THE QUEEN SERIES By
LJ MAAS
Ebook by PDAFiction.com
TO BECOME A QUEEN QUEST FOR A QUEEN THE HEART OF A QUEEN THE QUEEN OF MY HEART HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, GABRIELLE HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, XENA TO WALK THE PATH OF A QUEEN THE PERFECT GIFT
TO BECOME A QUEEN DISCLAIMER:
Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, etc. are ©copyright MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. I don't own them, I just play with them for a while and, like the good girl I am, I put them back when I'm done... okay, they get a little worn, but hey... I play hard! Absolutely no Copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fiction. It's intended as flattery toward the creators and actors of the characters. All other characters that appear are ©copyright
[email protected] This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way (unless, of course, Lucy, Renee, Rob, et al want to make my dream come true and hire me, hah!). Copies may be made for private use only and I'd appreciate if you included all copyright notices and this disclaimer. VIOLENCE WARNING: There is some violence (come on it's the Warrior Princess) and the after-effects of a
sexual assault in this story. It's mostly a hurt/comfort/longing type thing, but if you're sensitive to this kind of stuff, move on to something a little tamer. SEX: Yup, it's here! I mean it is Xena and Gabrielle, after all. It's not gratuitous, but it is explicit when it gets
going. This story shows consensual love/sex between two adult females. Consider yourself warned if you find that kind of thing offensive. If you're a hopeless romantic... this be the place! UNDERAGE WARNING: Hey, the Supreme Court said in Reno v. American Civil Liberties Union (1997) that
laws against making available, online, certain "indecent" materials for those under 18 was unconstitutional... look it up! Besides, this is perfectly "decent." I only know how others feel about my stories from feedback. Let me know what you think about it... homophobes need not apply, however. I'm at:
[email protected] TO BECOME A QUEEN
THE WARRIOR EASED up the reins of the golden mare, slowing her gait. Xena was near enough to the campsite she'd left Gabrielle at to relax a bit. Xena was returning from a village where the warrior had found the need to convince a few local thugs that it was in their best interest to move on. It hadn't taken much to convince them. You don't attack this village and I won't have to kill every last one of you. Why had she been in such a hurry to return? Once again she pondered the question, Argo's rhythmic hoof beats drawing her mind into an introspective mode. She had to leave Gabrielle behind on this trip, something that made for quite an unhappy bard. Of course, unhappy was an understatement. It took half the day for Xena to convince her the small village that requested help was a hard days ride to the south. With both of them on Argo it would take twice as long and they would be too late to be of any help to the villagers. Once Gabrielle saw the truth in this, she was disappointed, but understanding.
Gabrielle stood quietly by as Xena saddled Argo, turning away before Xena could see her wipe silent tears away. If only she knew how I feel leaving her behind, Xena thought as she grabbed Argo's reins. Of course, never one to be forthright with her feelings, she slid her warrior mask on and proceeded to give instructions to the bard.
"Remember, don't let yourself get caught too close to the stream if it rains... you should have plenty of firewood... you have enough food, don't you... don't sleep so sound you forget where you are... Gabrielle... are you listening to me?" "Xena," Gabrielle said as she placed her hands on the taller woman's arms, "I've done this before, remember?" Xena smiled at her own overprotective behavior where Gabrielle was concerned. "I know, Gabrielle... I'm sorry, but wouldn't you rather stay at the inn in Pelios till I get back? I'd feel a lot more comfortable with you there instead of out here leagues from nowhere." Gabrielle did her best imitation of a Warrior Princess eyebrow arch. "Right... I'd be much better off in town at an inn full of soldiers and drunks... no thanks! I feel safer out here. Again she asked herself the silent question. Why had she been in such a hurry to return? She knew the answer, but her heart and her head pulled her in two different directions of late. The answer was simple. Gabrielle... When did you change, Gabrielle? When did the little farm girl from Poteidaia become a woman? Not just a woman, the warrior mused to herself, but a very desirable one. It wasn't just the physical changes in Gabrielle that softened the warrior's gaze. Somewhere in the last few years Gabrielle had gone from a shy and naïve child to a beautiful, intelligent and compassionate woman. How did I miss it? When did you change,
Gabrielle? More importantly... when did you change, warrior? Xena was fully capable of inspecting her own motives and fears even as she was able to level that intense scrutiny at others. She may not have always liked what she saw in herself, but she never hid from herself either. One thing she was incapable of doing was lie to herself. Now, as she sat astride her horse, deep in thought, she was able to answer her own question, but that answer did little to ease her mind. Gabrielle was what
spurred her toward the campsite she had left the young woman at three days ago. "Gaia, this can't be happening to me!" she hissed between clenched teeth. How could I be in love with my best friend? There... she had voiced the thought that had been tormenting her days and nights for so many moons now. She seemed to make up endless excuses to touch Gabrielle lately. A hand gently placed on the elbow, fingers brushed against the other's when walking. Innocent physical contact that had her stomach doing major acrobatics. Lately her days had been filled with stolen glances at the beautiful young bard... her bard, while her nights were being consumed by a stronger passion. Her dreams were filled with visions of penetrating green eyes filled with desire. Moreover, in her dreams, the bard's passions were only quenched by her warrior. With each night that she succumbed to Morpheus' realm, the dreams became more vivid. The scene was never the same, but the intensity always was. One night their lovemaking would be slow and passionate, the next night they would throw themselves at one another with lustful abandon. It always started the same. Xena holding back her passions to the point of physical exhaustion, never wanting Gabrielle to discover that she wanted something more than friendship, desperately afraid her young friend would be repulsed by the warrior's affections, worse than that, leave her if she did know. Then came the moment when Xena could no longer control her emotions and an innocent kiss lasted moments longer than her good sense dictated. It was always Xena who tore her lips away in horror at her own actions, searching the green depths of Gabrielle's eyes for forgiveness. And, always Gabrielle who whispered, "Please, Xena... don't... don't stop." Xena shook her head as if to dispel the image of those green eyes before her. Oh, Gabrielle... will there ever come a day when I'll be able to tell you? "No," she muttered silently. Her friendship means too much to me now... I can't lose that. She's what keeps the Light going inside of me. Besides, even though she's Queen of the Amazons, I don't think Gabrielle even realizes women can love each other that way. Just keep it to yourself
warrior. At least this way I can have her close, even if it isn't all that I'd like it to be. Living in a realm of unrequited passions for her bard would have to suffice. Argo left the path before Xena even had to pull on her reins. "You know she's close too, don't you girl?" Xena dismounted and pulled the reins over the horse's head, leading the mare toward the campsite. Xena slowed her pace as she neared the camp. It seemed quiet, but since it was midmorning she assumed Gabrielle had only recently climbed out of her bedroll. The warrior allowed herself a smile, remembering the imaginative ways she had come up with to wake a sleepy bard. She's probably down by the stream she thought to herself as she entered the camp. Xena stopped and remained still as the hairs on the back of her neck stood up. Gabrielle's pack lay torn open, her scrolls strewn about the camp, the charred remains of a fish hung on a spit that leaned over the now cold firepit. "Gab-ri-elle...?" Xena slowly drawled as she knelt by what was left of the fire and felt the cold stones. Her eyes searched the camp and a tinge of fear swept through her body. "Gabrielle!" She shouted as she stood, reaching over her shoulder and drawing her sword, her body swirling around to scan the woods. Her eyes caught a glimpse of the bard's staff lying on the ground, one end covered in dried blood. Fear was quickly replaced with an emotion that was new to the warrior; terror. She circled the camp again and headed toward the stream, her long strides eating up the distance in between. No Gabrielle. Argo whinnied and pawed the ground nervously from a rise just beyond the campsite, the mare's movements drew Xena to the spot, but as she topped the rise she was unprepared for the site that awaited her. With a throat-tearing cry she fell to her knees as incomprehension hit her and anger flowed through every corner of her being. She swiftly brought her fingers to the side of the unconscious bard's neck and felt her own body tremble until she palpated the faint trace of a pulse. Gabrielle's face was a mass of bruises and her right arm was bent at an odd angle. Xena knew before she placed a hand on the limb that is was broken. Her top had been cut at the laces and her short amazon skirt was hiked above her waist,
dried blood smeared on the inside of her thighs. "Oh, Gabrielle," Xena moaned. There were no words that could take the pain from this moment, no tender embrace to make it allright again, no potion that could possibly stop the remembering. Xena's tears fell unheeded as she examined Gabrielle, checking for injuries. She splinted the broken arm immediately and gently lifted the bard into her arms. After settling Gabrielle on her bedroll at the camp, Xena hurried to the stream for water. Argo stood patiently by, but the warrior barely saw her. She grabbed bandages and some herbs from a saddlebag and set about getting a fire lit before hearing a soft moan. Kneeling beside the prone figure she stroked her hair and whispered her name. "Gabrielle?" There was no response from the bard and Xena willed herself not to fall apart now. Once she had heated the water that had been fetched from the stream, she began to clean and dress the young woman's other injuries. She mixed together a paste from one of the powders gathered from a leather pouch and placed the poultice on a particularly nasty bruise on the young woman's ribs. She wrapped a binding strip around Gabrielle's ribs, the action causing a small moan from the unconscious bard. She gently removed the remnants of Gabrielle's torn clothing, washing away the blood and the dirt from the small frame. She fought desperately to control her anger as she parted the bard's thighs, using a tender touch to examine and clean the damage the monsters had done. She placed Gabrielle in a clean shift and wrapped her still body in blankets, moving her closer to the warmth of the fire. Xena stood, stretching her muscles that had become tight with anger and exhaustion. "I'll make it better, Gabrielle... if it's the last thing I do before heading to the pits of Tartaurus... I'll make it better." Then Xena did something she had never done before. Falling to her knees, her arms tightly wrapped around her own torso, she openly sobbed and let her tears fall until even the Gods on Olympus felt the anguish of her heart breaking. She wept for an Amazon Queen and the gift that Queen had ripped from her, unable to give to her warrior.
* * *
Argo's muzzle pressed into Xena's back as the warrior realized darkness had descended on them. She managed to rise, feeling the pain of cramped muscles, and quietly removed Argo's saddle. The mare walked away, glad to be free of her burden for a while, knowing there would be no special attention from her mistress. Xena's eyes held a vacant sort of pain as she returned to kneel at Gabrielle's side. She stroked a flushed cheek, feeling the warmth of a fever. She would have to get her to a healer and Amazonia was 2 days ride to the north. Having decided what to do, Xena stretched her body out beside the sleeping form, wrapping her arms protectively around the bard, and for a short while slept soundly, connected by touch. "Noooo," Gabrielle screamed, clawing her way from Xena's sleeping embrace. Even with a broken arm, the bard's strength surprised the warrior, shaking off the vestiges of her slumber while trying to calm the terrified woman. "Gabrielle!" Xena shouted to be heard over the young woman's screams, pinning the bard's one good arm to her side. "Gabrielle... it's me..." "Get your hands off me!" Gabrielle spat out vehemently. Xena reacted like she'd been slapped, jerking her hands off the bard's body, falling back on her heels. The only sound was Gabrielle drawing in deep gulps of air as if she were drowning. "Gabrielle?" Xena questioned anxiously. "Xena?" Gabrielle's eyes began to lose their demented gaze and focused on the warrior in front of her. She squinted and shook her head as if fighting off the remnants of a nightmare, looking down at her splinted arm.
Then the memories assaulted her body with a jerk, looking into Xena's eyes, she cried out, "Oh, Xenaaaa." The young woman's sobs convulsed her small body, her lungs taking in ragged breaths. Xena was instantly at her side, crushing the bard's body to her own. Gabrielle froze and her whole body tensed at the contact. "Please..." Gabrielle pushed away from the warrior, "Please, Xena... just... don't touch me." Gabrielle crawled toward the end of the bedroll, wrapping her own arms around herself for comfort. She looked up into Xena's face, unable or unwilling to understand the hurt she saw in the warrior's eyes. "I'm sorry... I... I..." she mumbled so softly only the warrior's keen hearing picked up the words. "Gabrielle... Gabrielle?" she repeated, until the bard's eyes met hers. "It's allright, I do understand... Gabrielle, tell me, what can I do for you?" The bard's weeping continued as she shook her head back and forth. "Nothing," she cried, "there's nothing to be done." Xena knelt by the fire for a long time, listening to Gabrielle's tortured sobs. Her own body shook with rage, her mind exacting revenge over and over on the monsters responsible for the young woman's grief. Xena simply knelt there, unable to console her bard, unable to offer her the least bit of comfort. She was a warrior, a woman of actions, not of words. Words never came easy for her, emotions lay locked deep inside without being able to penetrate to the surface. She could never tell Gabrielle she loved her, that she was the only thing that held her together in this unforgiving world. Xena's embrace had always done that. She could never comfort by explaining that her past sometimes spilled into her present, an innocent bard all too often bearing the brunt of the warrior's guilt and shame. Those would be the times when Xena would stroke the bard's hair and pray to any God who would listen not to let Gabrielle leave her. Now, her caress, the only connection she had with the woman she so desperately loved had been torn into pieces. Gabrielle was repulsed by her touch.
Xena moved toward the fire, willing her body into action, though she felt as if she were simply going through the motions. Listening to Gabrielle's muffled sobs, she prepared a mug of tea, adding a pain killer and a sleeping draught to the warm liquid. Fearing her presence would only terrify the bard further, she placed the steaming mug in front of the young woman and moved back near the fire. "Please, Gabrielle... try to drink a little," Xena coaxed. Gabrielle drank the offered beverage and cried herself to sleep, her body curled up onto one of the blankets in a fetal position. Xena willed herself to move and lifted the sleeping bard, returning her to the bedroll and wrapping a blanket around her. Gabrielle twitched uneasily in her sleep, from nightmares or the fever Xena couldn't tell. There were a few more candlemarks till dawn and Xena pulled her bedroll so Gabrielle could see her lying across the fire from her if she should wake again. She lay there staring into the night, waiting for Morpheus to claim her. * * *
"Gabrielle... you need to drink this," Xena said, placing a bowl of warm broth to the young woman's lips. Xena kneeled behind the bard, her body supporting the smaller figure. Gabrielle was barely conscious, yet still she flinched at the touch as Xena wrapped one arm around her to hold her up, the other holding the wooden bowl. She could only add a small amount of painkiller to the liquid for fear of having Gabrielle slip further into the fevered sleep that now held her. No amount of prodding could wake the young bard beyond a few mumbled phrases. Her sleep was still plagued by nightmares, her small body trembled and jerked violently, tortured cries escaping her throat. All the while Xena did her best to watch over the bard. Gabrielle's
unresponsiveness allowed the warrior to hold the young woman, something the bard avoided in her cognizant moments. Xena redressed her wounds and reapplied poultices, looking through eyes filled with hurt and emptiness. She knew that some women never got over the emotions associated with an attack like this. Thinking of Gabrielle, the young woman whose loving nature and smile could melt her heart, a woman who exemplified the meaning of goodness, thinking that she might turn into a bitter and fearful individual tore at Xena's very core. By midday, Gabrielle's worsened condition warranted the risk of traveling to the Amazon village. Xena could no longer control the fever that raged inside of the younger woman. Even when she carried her limp body down to the stream and immersed her into the cold, shallow waters, until her own body became numb with the cold. She feared what might happen to her bard without the help of a healer. So, after wrapping an oblivious Gabrielle carefully in blankets, her arm in a protective sling held tight to her body, Xena climbed aboard Argo. With Gabrielle cautiously tucked sidesaddle in front of the warrior, her arms wrapped securely around the smaller woman, Xena urged Argo into a swift pace. The mare seemed to understand the urgency of the situation as she sped along the well-beaten trail. Sweat glistened on the broad chest of the golden mare as her hooves thundered along, her breath coming in loud bellows. The proud war-horse felt something she couldn't quite place emanating from the mistress who held her reins. Something that flowed off of the warrior like waves in the water. It felt a lot like... fear. Apollo had just begun his ascent into the sky, Xena finally slowing their pace as they entered Amazon territory, Argo's muscles twitching with exhaustion. The mare's nostrils flared as she blew out deep gusts of air. Xena silently cursed herself for having to push Argo to such an extreme, but the strong horse had turned a two-day journey into one. "We're here, Gabrielle," she whispered to the unconscious bard. Hearing a shrill birdcall from the trees, Xena stopped. Drawing her sword from the leather scabbard strapped to her back, in one fluid motion she
flung the blade, embedding it in the soft earth at Argo's feet. Five Amazon warriors jumped down from the trees above them. One of them pulled her mask off, concern already showing on her face. "Xena?" the Amazon questioned, staring at the still figure in Xena's arms. "Eponin," Xena acknowledged the dark-haired warrior, "It's Gabrielle... I need to get her to a healer, quickly!" "Sartori is in the village," Eponin abruptly answered. She grabbed the hilt of the sword, in the ground at her feet, and tossed it up to Xena. "Go!" she shouted as she slapped the mare's rump to get her started. Xena galloped off with her precious bundle wrapped securely in her arms. Eponin hurriedly barked orders to her comrades behind her and left three of the Amazons to guard the area as she and the younger, Tarazon quickly headed toward the village. Thinking of her Queen, Eponin's heart broke at the thought of her sick or injured. She, as well as most of the women in the village had shamelessly flirted with the young Queen during her visits, but it didn't take an idiot to see that Gabrielle only had eyes for Xena. "If only I could trade places with you for a day, you big dumb warrior," she muttered to herself. * * *
Sartori helped Xena lower Gabrielle to a cot in the healer's hut. Pulling the blankets away, a small gasp could be heard from Ephiny, who had just entered the small room. The Queen Regent had never seen her small friend so ill and the site of it took her breath away. Sartori pulled the hood of her cloak from away from her face and Xena noticed the long jagged scar that ran from the woman's temple, across her cheek, and along her jaw line. She began to carefully examine the prone
figure, occasionally interrupting the movement of her hands to question Xena. "How long has she had the fever?... Has she been drinking?... Does she respond to pain?... Have you medicated her?... Which herbs?" Xena did her best to focus on the older woman's interrogation, though days of no sleep and the arduous ride were beginning to make themselves felt by her fatigued body. By now, Eponin joined Ephiny in the room and a number of Amazons anxiously waited outside of the hut for news of their Queen. A loud moan escaped Gabrielle's lips as Sartori pressed the flat of her hand against the bard's abdomen, just below her navel. Turning back toward Xena, the healer saw a pained expression on the warrior's face and received an answer to her silent query. Pulling a bedcloth over Gabrielle, the healer stood and addressed the crowd on concerned faces. "I can't work with all of you here!" She said, motioning with her arms to the door. "Out! All of you... now." Ephiny placed a gentle hand on Xena's arm trying to pull the warrior outside. She wanted to hear what had happened to her young friend, but she also saw the pain in the warrior's eyes. She trusted Sartori's skills and knew Gabrielle was in good hands. She also knew the tall, raven-haired warrior looked like she could use a friend. Urging Xena to follow her, she was stopped by Sartori's voice. "Xena," the healer's voice that was so hard a moment before, now as soft as a caress, "May I have a moment with you... alone?" she added this last as Ephiny had turned also. "I'll wait outside," Ephiny said. Catching the silent nod from Sartori, the Regent noiselessly pulled the door to the hut closed behind her. "Xena," the older woman began, "How did Gabrielle receive these injuries?" Xena looked as if she hadn't heard the healer as she struggled with the
answer. Silently, she moved to the side of the cot and knelt on the floor, reaching out shaking fingers she swept a golden lock of hair off the bard's forehead. A silent tear rolled down the warrior's cheek and splashed softly on the bard's bare shoulder. "I need to know..." the healer placed a hand on the kneeling warrior's back. "I believe she's been hurt... inside." Xena continued to lovingly stroke Gabrielle's face and almost so quiet it was less that a whisper, she said, "she was... she was raped." Outside of the healer's hut, set slightly apart from the rest of the village, came the sound of a woman softly singing. It was not a happy song, nor the sound of mourning, but there was a haunted sadness about it. A few more women joined in and a drum began beating... slowly, like the beating of a heart. Xena knelt that way by Gabrielle's side, not hearing as Sartori moved around the hut, making preparations to treat her patient. Or should she say patients. Sartori watched Xena from the corner of her eye and couldn't help but notice the tender caresses the warrior placed on the young Queen, even though the warrior looked as if she might collapse from exhaustion at any moment herself. "Xena, lie down over here," the healer guided the warrior reluctantly from the Queen's bedside to a cot in the dark shadows of the room. "Drink this," she said, wrapping Xena's fingers around a mug of steaming liquid. Xena caught the unmistakable scent rising from the tea and raised her weary eyes to the healer. "I need to be with Gabrielle... I don't need to sleep" "Yes, warrior... you do need to sleep." Sartori said forcefully. "Frankly, you look like Tartaurus and if you're going to be of any use to that young woman over there," she nodded her head toward Gabrielle, "then you're
going to have to get some rest." "What if she wakes up, I want..." Xena started. "Xena," Sartori interrupted her, sitting on the bed next to the warrior. "I need to examine Gabrielle... inside. I believe she might have suffered a deep laceration that has become infected. That would explain her fever. If this is true, I'll need to lance the abscess and then I'll keep Gabrielle sedated for a day or two. Her body will need the rest after she's fought this fever for so long, and it will make the pain easier to bear. Pushing Xena back onto the cot, Sartori continued, "I'll let you know if there's any change at all." Sartori helped the warrior remove her armor as she sipped the warm tea. Xena eased her body back into the cushions of the cot, turning her face so she could see Gabrielle. She did something she rarely did, she relaxed her mind, releasing it from its constant vigil. By the time Sartori had collected everything she needed and placed it all on an undersized table near Gabrielle's cot, Xena's eyes had become heavy-lidded. Sartori plucked the empty mug from the warrior's grasp just as she began to lose her grip. She pulled a blanket around the already sleeping warrior and crossed the room, opening the door of the hut. "Ephiny," she said to the Regent who had been waiting on a bench in front of the entrance to the healer's hut. Ephiny took in the sleeping form of Xena on a cot in the corner as Sartori closed the door. "I gave her something to sleep," the healer answered the Regent's silent question. "Between you and me, I'm amazed she was able to stand." "You don't know Xena very well," Ephiny smiled, "especially where Gabrielle is concerned." "I'm beginning to get that feeling," Sartori allowed herself a small smile too.
Something she seldom did these days. "What happened, Sartori?" Ephiny questioned, motioning toward Gabrielle. The Regent was barely able to control her rage as she leaned over her young friend, investigating the mass of bruises that covered her face. "Who could have done this?" She said through clenched teeth. "Perhaps you should speak to Xena when she wakes," Sartori started to explain. Confused by the healer's words, Ephiny turned her body toward the Sartori, "If Xena had something to do with this..." She hissed. Sartori raised her hand, abruptly stopping the Regent. "Xena feels our Queen's pain as if it were her own. I only mean that the Queen should be allowed her privacy." Sartori struggled not to lie to the Regent, but the young Queen would have enough of a battle just dealing with her own emotions, without having the entire village know of her humiliation. Ephiny clenched her fists with frustration and anger. She didn't have to talk to Xena to know that Gabrielle had been attacked. She had seen the bruises on the young woman's thighs and abdomen during the healer's examination. Turning again toward Gabrielle's still form, "Will she be allright, Sartori?" "Time will be the deciding factor... I think she may have an internal injury. I need to work quickly... so, if you don't mind, Regent..." Sartori motioned toward the door. Turning back to face the healer before she strode through the open door, Ephiny asked, "Is there anything I can do, Sartori?" The healer stopped in the middle of the room, her back facing Ephiny. "Go to Artemis' temple. Perhaps an offering for the Goddess' Chosen might be in order."
* * *
Xena pulled Gabrielle on top of her and undid the laces of the smaller woman's green top. Sliding her hands under the loosened garment, she moaned into Gabrielle's mouth, her hands brushing across the wonderfully smooth flesh and the already stiff nipples. Gabrielle returned the moan as she directed her kisses along the warrior's jawbone taking an earlobe into her mouth and teasing the flesh with the tip of her tongue. "Gods, Gabrielle!" Xena groaned, throwing her head back when Gabrielle rolled a hardened nipple between her thumb and forefinger. The bard removed her lips from Xena's earlobe, but not before she took the sensitive flesh between her teeth and gently bit down. Xena groaned and began to writhe under the bard's electric touch. Her skin burning like fire wherever the bard's tongue stroked her. Gabrielle's tongue began to caress it's way down Xena's neck, stopping to cover the warrior's jugular with her mouth, sucking hard until a deep red mark appeared against the warrior's bronze skin. She continued the journey downward with her tongue, stopping occasionally to nip at the soft flesh. Her tongue traced imaginary patterns across Xena's breasts, never touching the nipple, but allowing her warm breath to kiss the hardened nub. "Please, Gabrielle!" Xena whimpered, entwining her hands in Gabrielle's hair and pulling the bard toward her. Gabrielle smiled and slowly licked the nipple, Xena arching her body toward the source of the delicious pleasure. Gabrielle began to lick the
nipple faster and faster until Xena's body felt a charged jolt directly from her swollen nipple to her center, as Gabrielle covered the entire nipple with her hot, wet mouth. "Ohhhh, Gods, yesss..." Xena moaned. "Gabrielle... Oh, Gabrielle..." * * *
Sartori finished re-packing the herb soaked moss and pulled the sheet up to cover Gabrielle. The young woman's fever was down and she no longer held the flushed, coloring in her cheeks. The healer's strong hands held the young woman up and Gabrielle unconsciously drank the water, laced with sedative, which was placed to her lips. She had only had to change the moss once today and even then it was covered in the clear fluid that indicated healing. She scrubbed her hands in a large bowl on the table and turned an eye toward the soft moans coming from the corner of the room. It had been two days and still the warrior slept, just as much from tension and fear, as from physical exhaustion. She placed a hand on Xena's forehead, and covered her once again with the sheet the warrior was determined to kick off in her sleep. "Gabrielle... Oh, Gabrielle" Xena moaned in her sleep. A wry smile found it's way to Sartori's face as she looked from the ravenhaired woman to her Queen. "I'll warrant she doesn't know you meet her in Morpheus' realm, does she, warrior?" She said, pulling up her cloak and walking from the hut to stretch her legs. * * *
"Oh, Gabrielle," Xena moaned at the contact as she slid her mound along Gabrielle's thigh, her juices leaving a slick trail. Xena smiled wickedly as Gabrielle's body shuddered with unspoken desire at the feel of the liquid fire between the warrior's legs. Struggling in vain, her hands securely held in the warrior's iron grip. "Xena, please... it doesn't have to be this way," the bard pleaded. How could she make the dark-haired warrior understand? Didn't she know the bard had spent so many moons praying that Xena would finally look at her with something more than friendship? Couldn't she see that Gabrielle longed for Xena's touch... her caress... her kiss. Gabrielle looked up into the eyes that once were a hypnotic blue, those eyes that had captivated her so many times, only to see the icy eyes of a stranger looking back at her. "Xena, ... please... no..." "Don't pretend, Gabrielle," Xena purred, "Isn't this what you wanted?" The warrior held the bard's hands tightly above her head in one of her own, the other pulling at the laces and ripping the green top from her body. Xena pinched the bard's nipple and Gabrielle tried to stifle a gasp. Xena's mouth hungrily covered the hardened nub, her teeth pulling at it painfully as she drew her lips away. Gabrielle began to thrash from side to side striving to escape from the warrior pinning her from above. The warrior's muscular frame held her down securely, her futile attempts only serving to excite Xena more. Xena's free hand ripped away the bard's skirt and she forced the young woman's legs apart with her knees. She drew her fingers to slide across the bard's wetness. "Your lips say no, but your body says yes," Xena growled. "Xena... please, no... Noooo!" Gabrielle screamed.
* * *
"No!" Gabrielle hissed behind clenched teeth. Her eyes opened wide as she woke suddenly, trying to focus in the dim light of the hut. "Sshhh... It's allright." A dark form moved toward the sleepy bard. "Xena?" Gabrielle whispered quietly. "No, my Queen. My name is Sartori." The healer answered as she moved into the light and pulled back her cloak. She searched Gabrielle's eyes for signs of fear or loathing, something that had become habit since she sported the jagged scar down the side of her face. In Gabrielle's green eyes, she saw none and was genuinely surprised. "Where am I?" Gabrielle said, trying to adjust her eyes to the dim light inside the hut. "You are in the Amazon Village, and I am your healer, my Queen." Sartori watched as Gabrielle's eyes slowly came awake and became accustomed to the absence of light within the room. She motioned toward the cot in the corner of the hut and Gabrielle saw the sleeping figure of Xena. Relief and dread filled her in the same instant. Sartori watched as a cloud of torment passed in front of the young woman's eyes. "The warrior's presence relieves you and troubles you at the same time, my Queen." It was not a question nor an accusation, merely an observation by the healer. "Is she allright?" Gabrielle stared at Xena's sleeping form. Memories were beginning to return. Xena holding her and dressing her wounds, Xena feeding her, Xena suffering the icy water of the stream to keep the bard's fever in check, Xena, hurling curses toward the Gods, sobbing in anger and frustration at Gabrielle's attack. Disjointed scenes raced passed her
eyes, as if she had been viewing them from outside herself. "I think..." Gabrielle said hoarsely, "I think I treated her badly." Sartori poured a mug of spring water from a pitcher on the table and stood before Gabrielle. "Some water?" She questioned. Gabrielle nodded silently and the Healer helped ease her into a sitting position, placing some pillows behind her and elevating her splinted arm. She took the offered cup in her good hand wincing with the effort and let the cool liquid slide down her parched throat. When she had drunk her fill she placed the cup into Sartori's waiting hands. "Why do you feel as though you've treated your friend badly, your highness?" Sartori questioned. "Please, Sartori... call me Gabrielle," the young Queen requested. Gabrielle had still never become comfortable with the formality surrounding someone addressing her. She continued to stare at Xena's sleeping form. The warrior lay on her side, her face toward the wall. "The things she's done for me... if you only knew the lengths she goes to in order to keep me safe... the things she's willing to do for me." Tears welled in the young Queen's eyes and spilled onto her cheeks as she squeezed her eyes shut and thought about the love she would never be able to share with her warrior. Now, the one place she had, her dreams, where her fantasies of a raven-haired warrior making love to her, had been destroyed. Every time Gabrielle closed her eyes to dream, Xena became her attacker. How cruel of the Gods, Gabrielle thought to herself. "Her heart is filled with love for you," Sartori whispered. "How could she love me now?" Gabrielle said in a small voice, "after... after what happened. I can't even give her the gift of myself anymore." "Gabrielle, aren't you forgetting that you were the victim of this attack?" Sartori asked the young woman knowingly. After all, the healer thought to
herself, wasn't she able to understand the Queen's pain better than most? There would be time enough to explain to the young woman all about the eyes of love, but now was not the time for rationalization. She understood the feelings of shame and worthlessness that now plagued Gabrielle. Later, when the young woman was stronger, she would show her the proof of the healer's words. "I can't seem to control these... these images in my mind..." Gabrielle swiped away the tears that continued to fall. "When Xena touches me, I mean... I just can't be touched by her." She finished, not able to admit to the Healer what her dreams held. Sartori nodded. This, too, she understood more than the young woman knew. Reaching a gentle hand under the bard's chin until their eyes met, "Gabrielle, do you know why it is that they call a woman's innocence a gift?" A small sob escaped Gabrielle's lips as she shook her head back and forth, a fresh stream of tears blurring her vision. The healer never broke eye contact with her young Queen saying, "It's because it is something that can never be taken away... only given." These unexpected words of hope and compassion released the last vestiges of Gabrielle's heartache and she wept cradled in the arms of the Healer who was not many seasons older than herself, but whom the Goddess Artemis selected to aid in her chosen's time of grief. The sounds of Gabrielle's weeping caused the Healer and the young Queen to be oblivious to any other sounds in the room and Xena was grateful. She stared silently at the wall as her own hot tears soaked the fur under her head. Could she have loved me? Would she have accepted
me loving her in that way? What difference does it make now... she doesn't want me to touch her... ever. Gabrielle's words had left the warrior with an empty ache that nothing in life could ease.
* * *
Dawn had barely begun streaking the sky with yellow and pinks swirls when Xena awakened again. She listened for the sound of Gabrielle's steady breathing, something she had grown accustomed to doing. Assured the young woman was still fast asleep, the warrior forced her stiff limbs up from the pallet. She found her saddlebags and her weapons at the foot of the cot and quietly picked them up, making her way out of the hut. Xena found her way to the warm spring baths. Steam curled throughout the expansive room. In the center of the large cavern was one large, deep pool. Further back, smaller pools were elevated on stair-stepped levels. At the far end, water from a hot spring cascaded down a small waterfall, draining into the Queen's pool. The morning sun had not yet risen to the point where it would be visible through the numerous round holes carved into the cavern's ceiling. Xena lit a few of the thick candles housed on the cavern ledges and their light bathed the room in eerie shadows that flickered and jumped on the walls and the surface of the water. Stripping her leathers from her body, she walked down the stone steps to the water. She took a breath and dove into the center of the deep pool, her body cut into the water with barely a ripple, surfacing on the other side. The warmth of the water penetrated her muscles, releasing the anger and tension in them. Xena lay against the side of the pool, floating atop the water's surface, her heart an empty void. She remained that way for some time neither awake nor asleep. Finally pulling herself from the water, she rummaged through her saddlebag for a clean shift to put on. She picked up the soiled leather tunic and began the task of cleaning the garment. This errand was another one of the many chores the warrior usually used at the end of a day to put her into a near meditative state. It freed her mind to roam and examine the
day's activities. By the time the last grommet was being polished she had found the peace she had been searching for. If not peace then at least a truce in her mind's eye.
Here I am feeling sorry for myself... miserable over what I'll never have. When all this time it's Gabrielle that's suffered the most. What did Sartori say to her? "Gabrielle, aren't you forgetting that you were the victim of this attack?" My bard is filled with pain and nothing but shame and I'm just thinking of myself... how miserable my life will be! How can I even profess to love her?!? By the Gods, I've been so selfish! I'm going to be there for you, Gabrielle. I'm going to help you get passed this. Even if it means that I'll never know your love that way... I will get you through this! * * *
Two shimmers of light illuminated the walls of the cave as Xena strode resolutely toward the Healer's hut. "Nice thing, ya did for the warrior babe, " said the figure draped in diaphanous veils. "Whatever do you mean, Aphrodite?" The Goddess Artemis said with a smirk as she gently touched her index finger to the pool of water to remove the enchantment she had placed there. "Right... and you were just here to, like, clean the pool, huh?" "I didn't interfere... I simply helped the warrior to look at things with a different perspective." Artemis hedged. "Have you seen Ares?" she asked, narrowing her eyes. "Nope, he seems to have made himself scarce during this whole bummer
of a scene." Aphrodite answered her hands on her hips. "Ya know, I was this close with those two... poor, Gabrielle." "If I find out leather-boy had anything to do with the attack on my chosen... I'll cut off his tiny balls and let Gabrielle hang them from her staff!" The sounds of approaching women quickly cut off the conversation between the two Goddesses and the only witness to their presence were the thin multicolored sparkles left in the wake of their transportation. * * *
Xena opened the door to the Healer's hut and found Gabrielle still resting quietly. Sartori was gone and the warrior deposited her weapons and bags on the floor by the door. Standing over Gabrielle, she knelt to one knee, glancing down at the young woman's sleeping face. Some of the bruises were already beginning to fade in the few days they had been in the Amazon village. Xena tried to push down the feelings of guilt, hanging her head at her own shame. If only I'd been there, Gabrielle... "Hi," the sleepy voice said. Xena looked up, momentarily startled. She found herself looking into the most beautiful sight in the known world. "Hi, there, yourself, sleepyhead!" She couldn't suppress the large, toothy grin from her face. "Wait a minute... I remember waking up yesterday and a certain warrior princess was snoring." "I do not snore," Xena replied, raising an eyebrow in mock anger. She enjoyed the bard's good-natured teasing, now more than any other time. It seemed to be a start. Gabrielle started to sit up, awkwardly with one arm wrapped and splinted.
Xena didn't know whether to help or not, knowing the young woman's reaction to her touch. "Do you need some help?" Xena asked shyly. "No, I guess I better get used to flying on one wing," Gabrielle answered quickly, looking up in time to catch the look of pain that crossed the warrior's face. "Could I have some water, though?" The warrior's face brightened at the request and moved toward the table in the center of the room. Xena, anxious to help in some way, quickly brought the requested water and resumed her kneeling position next to Gabrielle. "Can I do anything else, Gabrielle... are you hungry? I could--" Without thinking Xena rested her fingers on Gabrielle's thigh. Even through the blanket the warrior felt the muscles of Gabrielle's leg clench and she snapped her hand away, looking down at her fingers as if they were burned. I know you don't mean to, Gabrielle, but you have every right to
hate me for not being able to protect you. Gabrielle couldn't stop the involuntary reaction Xena's touch caused. She knew it was only because of the vivid images in her dreams. She also knew she had to get herself and her emotions under control. "I--I'm just having a hard time being... being touched right now." Gabrielle whispered. The bard's heart broke at the expression on Xena's face and tears welled in her own eyes. "Xena..." Gabrielle reached over and placed her hand over the warrior's own. Xena saw the muscles twitch in the young woman's hand, but it remained over the warrior's fingers. "You're still my best friend... right?" Gabrielle said softly, trying to make eye contact with the warrior. "Absolutely," Xena said without hesitation, giving the bard a lop-sided grin.
I know you're trying, Gabrielle.
"Could I ask you a huge favor then?" "Anything, Gabrielle... you know that," Xena answered seriously. "I really want a nice warm bath... and, well... I... it's kind of embarrassing, but I don't think I can do it alone." Xena just stared blankly at the young woman for a moment until Gabrielle raised her broken arm slightly. "Oh!" Xena exclaimed, the realization of the request hitting her. "Of course!" Xena stood but wasn't sure where to begin. This was going to be difficult enough, but it would be even harder if she couldn't touch the young woman.
Seeing you naked, Gabrielle... Gods, this is going to be rough! "It's okay, Xena... I'm not going to go to pieces if you touch me." Gabrielle tried to assure the warrior. This was beginning to feel like the hardest thing the young bard had ever done, but she needed to show Xena their friendship was still there. That she still needed her around, which was quite true. Her mind told her she still loved this woman with all her being. It was her body that reacted violently to the warrior's touch, and Gabrielle's heart that felt unworthy of such love right now. Having you undress me, warrior...
Gods, this is going to be rough! "Why don't we start by sitting on the edge of the bed, Gabrielle." A wave of dizziness washed over the bard as she planted her feet on the floor, her right hand squeezing Xena's forearm until it passed. "And, just what do you two think you are doing?" Sartori's voice sounded none to pleased. She had walked in so silently even Xena hadn't heard. Gabrielle looked the Healer straight in the eye and said, "I am going to take a bath... and she--," Gabrielle jerked her thumb in Xena's direction, "-is with me."
Xena looked at Sartori with a "whatever Gabrielle wants, Gabrielle gets" grin. The young Queen didn't leave much room for argument, however, and the young Healer instantly backed down. "At least let me get a couple of guards to--" "No," Gabrielle answered quickly. "Xena's going to help me." She finished, smiling ever so slightly at the warrior. The feelings in Xena's heart for this young bard literally radiated from her features. The warrior's face was one of love and pride, as she looked at Sartori a little smugly. Sartori caught the exchange between the two women and still wondered in her heart why Gabrielle had never seen the obvious. To be loved that much, the Healer thought to herself. "Then I will not argue, my Queen," Sartori said with a slight bow. * * *
Sartori provided a simple wrap around tunic for Gabrielle to wear and once Xena had collected the necessary bath items, she and the bard walked toward the baths. It was slow going for Gabrielle. Not only was her body one large bruise, she'd also been bedridden for nearly a week. "Gabrielle, do you want to rest for a minute?" Xena asked. Her right arm was wrapped around the young woman's waist so there was no chance the bard would fall, but Xena could see the light sheen of perspiration on the bards upper lip and the heavy breaths she was taking. "Yea... sounds... good," she answered, panting slightly. Truth be known, Gabrielle's muscles were twitching over more than just exertion. Part of her was breathless, as always, over Xena's touch the other part of her cringed
at the constant, violent images that were assaulting her brain. It was as if the Furies were waging a war within her mind, her exhausted body wavering between pain and desire. Ephiny saw the two slowly making their way toward the baths as she crossed the center of the village and silently thanked Artemis for Gabrielle's return to health. She had done as Sartori asked, staying away from the Healer's hut until Gabrielle and Xena both had a few days to mend. The Regent noticed it would be a while before the bruises disappeared, but the sight of her young friend up and about lightened her heart quite a bit. "Gabrielle, you look wonderful!" Ephiny said smiling at the two women, "Oh, yea... Xena, you look okay too," she finished with a dismissing wave toward the dark-haired warrior. "Yea, right!" Gabrielle answered while Xena just raised her eyebrow and smirked at the Regent. "Eph, if I look anything like I feel, it must be pretty bad." "How do you feel... really?" Ephiny asked with concern. "Like I was just run over by an oxcart... then they backed up and ran over me again, and then once more just for good measure." Gabrielle said cheerlessly. Ephiny laughed and said something about some queens doing anything for a little R&R and she left the two women with a promise to see them at lunch. The Regent caught up with Eponin and asked the warrior to see to it that their Queen had a little privacy in her bath. "And, Ep... be tactful, okay? I mean, just make it a suggestion." "Hey, I'm a warrior... I only know how to do things one way," Eponin said, winking. Gabrielle and Xena continued their slow progress to the baths and the
warrior couldn't shake the way Gabrielle acted when she had talked to Ephiny. The young bard barely made eye contact with the Regent, her glance constantly shifting toward the ground. Gabrielle talked like her old self, but her countenance was flaccid and lifeless, as if she were simply going through the motions. Xena kept trying to steal a look in the bard's eye while she spoke to Ephiny, finally she saw the truth. There was simply no light in the young woman's gaze, no sparkle to the usual mischievous green eyes. * * *
Bathing without touching turned out to be a harrowing experience for the two women. They attempted to get Gabrielle's shift removed a number of times, one of them always turning the wrong way at the last moment. The final straw came when Gabrielle's splinted arm swung around and cracked Xena in the jaw. The warrior rubbed her sore jaw as the bard looked up at the taller woman in horror. Their eyes met and they began to smile at one another, then the smiles turned into laughter. It was the first relaxing moment Gabrielle had experienced since she had stepped into this nightmare. "I don't suppose you let me do that on purpose," Gabrielle said, trying to cover her smile at their old joke. "Uh, uh" the warrior answered, failing in her attempt at being indignant. "Gabrielle... would you feel more comfortable... if someone else did this?" the warrior said soberly. "I don't know... It might look bad if I used one of my subject's head as a battering ram." Xena smiled and appreciated Gabrielle's attempt to make light of the
situation. "Gabrielle... how attached are you to that shift?" She said as she pulled her breast dagger from it's hiding place, an evil gleam in her eye. "I had a feeling that would be our only choice... okay," Gabrielle assented. Both women survived the trauma of cutting the shift off the young bard and getting her into the warm pool of water. Xena judiciously left her shift on as she stepped into the water to steady Gabrielle. The young bard ran through a gauntlet of emotions as Xena assisted her in scrubbing her back, washing her hair, and keeping her right arm as dry as possible. Once the quiet had descended between the two women, Gabrielle leaned her head against the stone edge of the small pool and soaked in the warmth of the water. Xena sat atop the pool's smooth edge and slid her dagger against a small whetstone in tiny circular motions. The warrior continually glanced down at Gabrielle, breathing deeply when the bard's beauty nearly made the breath catch in her throat. "Gabrielle," Xena said breaking the silence. "Mmmm," the bard responded without opening her eyes. "Do you want to talk about... it?" Xena questioned. "No." The bard returned quickly, sitting straight up. They both knew what they were talking about without really saying. "I just thought--" Xena started. "No, Xena. I just... I just feel like I'll lose it and I'm not quite ready to go there yet." The meditative mood of both women had been lost and Xena cursed herself for bringing the subject up. She had only meant to help Gabrielle, to get her to open up and talk about the attack, hoping it would bring the bard some measure of healing. Instead, they now sat in an awkward silence, the
moments of peaceful companionship gone. "I think I'm turning into a prune." Gabrielle stated, her way of getting the ball rolling again and changing the subject. Xena had been dreading this moment for what seemed like an eternity. Cutting off Gabrielle's shift and getting her in the water hadn't been nearly as bad as helping a naked bard out of the water, drying her off, and aiding her in dressing. Xena placed a gentle arm around Gabrielle's waist, supporting her as the young woman pulled herself from the pool. The water cascaded in thin rivulets down the bard's body, falling from firm breasts, down her muscled abdomen, and into the reddish-blonde patch of hair between her legs. Xena, in the meantime, was desperately trying to keep her hands and eyes everywhere but where they actually wanted to be. What Gods have I offended today to deserve this torture? Gabrielle was having problems of her own. She was still wet from the bath, but she felt herself starting to sweat. Xena's hands felt like silk against her skin. The warrior's shift was soaked through in places where Gabrielle had leaned against her, the cloth clinging to her well-muscled frame. One moment she envisioned Xena caressing her entire body, the next, a more violent vision of the warrior filled her senses... more pain melded with desire. Artemis, how have I offended you today to deserve such torture? "Feel better?" Xena asked as they now made their way out of the baths. "I feel cleaner, anyway," Gabrielle said wryly. "Xena, I don't want to go back to Sartori's hut. I want to stay in my own hut." The Queen's hut was closer to the center of the village and by now the entire Amazon village was up and at their daily tasks. Gabrielle was a well loved Queen and it seemed to Xena that everyone from here to the Centaur village stopped the two to inquire as to how the young Queen was getting along. Xena could see Gabrielle was beginning to tire, her knees looked a bit wobbly, besides, having people in her "space" was beginning to irritate the warrior. She bent down and placed her free arm under Gabrielle's knees and scooped her up into her arms.
"She needs some rest," was all Xena said to a few gaping inquiries, as she turned towards the hut with Gabrielle in her arms. "Xena, I can walk," Gabrielle said, unconvincingly. Xena never stopped walking as she raised one eyebrow at the bard, "I've seen new-born colts that were steadier on their feet." Truth be know, Gabrielle had secretly loved the gesture. The young woman pushed down the feelings and images that had begun to plague her every moment and rested her head against the warrior's shoulder. Closing her eyes, Gabrielle breathed in the scent that was distinctly the warrior's; jasmine and leather. She was fast asleep by the time the warrior tenderly placed her on the bed in her own quarters. * * *
Several candlemarks passed before Gabrielle was thrown into the same nightmare that she seemed to have whether she was awake or asleep. She felt herself being pulled from the Warlord Xena's dreamscape embrace. A delicate touch was pulling at the bard's shoulder and she slowly opened her eyes. Feeling as though she had slipped from one ordeal into another, Gabrielle jerked her body away from the blue penetrating gaze. "Gabrielle, it's me... Xena." The dark-haired warrior said, trying not to let Gabrielle's reaction bother her. "Xena... I'm sorry. I was having a nightmare and, uh... I must not have been quite awake yet," Gabrielle lied. "Are you sure you're allright now?" "Yea, thanks," Gabrielle answered running her fingers through her hair.
"Well, I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I better go find Eponin and see if she minds having a roommate for a while," Xena stood and stretched her back. Gabrielle watched Xena stretch her muscles and wondered how long the warrior had been kneeling by her bed, watching her. She had listened to Xena's words, but hadn't really heard them yet. When the realization hit her she didn't know exactly how to react. "Eponin? But... well, I guess I just thought..." Gabrielle stammered. "Thought... what?" Xena asked. While Gabrielle slept, Xena had decided that the young woman probably didn't want the warrior sleeping in the same hut. It seemed as if Xena's very presence was particularly hard on the bard. The warrior attributed it to her failure to protect Gabrielle, as if the bard couldn't help but blame her for not being there. The warrior certainly couldn't condemn Gabrielle for such feelings. Gabrielle, in the meantime, was trying hard to control tears that lay just under the surface. Of course, Xena wouldn't want to be here with her, not now. She was damaged goods, now, wasn't she. I guess it must get pretty
old having to save me all the time. Gabrielle's self worth lowered with each heartbeat that passed. Her bardic imagination began to turn the simplest of statements into mountains of selfloathing. Xena watched as Gabrielle's inner struggle continued. The warrior was getting mixed signals from the young woman and was no longer sure about her course of action. "Gabrielle, I just thought... that maybe... you'd like a little privacy is all..." Xena began to find something on the floor captivating, unable to meet Gabrielle's eyes. Her heart couldn't take it if the young woman looked gladdened about her leaving. Xena finally stole a glance at her bard. What she saw surprised her, and a Warrior Princess isn't often surprised.
Gabrielle was staring at the floor, silent tears beginning to spill from her eyes. "Gabrielle, what is it?" Xena moved quickly to kneel in front of the young bard, concern written across her features. "It's nothing... I shouldn't be crying... if you want to leave--" Gabrielle began to say through her tears. "But, I thought you wanted me to leave." Xena said, stunned by her own honest admission. "No," the bard exclaimed, a little more forcefully than she intended. "I don't want to be here alone... and I don't want to be here without you," she finished with a whisper. "I'd give you a hug, but I have a feeling that would only make it worse, huh?" Xena said tenderly, the corners of her mouth curling upward. Gabrielle paused and took in a few deep breaths, wiping her tears away with the palm of her hand. "I'm sorry, Xena... I know it's no picnic being around someone who can't seem to stop crying half the time and doesn't want anyone to touch her the other half. I just need to get myself under control... then I'll be better--" "Gabrielle," Xena placed her hands on the bed on each side of the bard, as the warrior continued to kneel in front of the woman. "Maybe that's just what you need to let go of right about now... some of that control. Look, I'm an expert at burying the past, thinking if I keep it locked up inside it won't hurt me. But it still does... when you least expect it, it'll hit you and knock you flat... unless you deal with it." "I just don't know if I can right now." "Every moment you wait makes it that much harder. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about here. Scream, cry, curse the Gods... hit me if you want someone to punch, but don't hold this in, Gabrielle."
Then Gabrielle did something Xena was also an expert at, but that she had never known her bard to be capable of. Gabrielle slid a warrior's mask in place. Her face became impassive and she took a slow, even breath to steady herself. "I just can't, Xena... not yet. Please, understand." Gabrielle pleaded. The warrior looked at the young bard with all of the love and compassion in her heart. "Just know that I'll be there for you when you need me, allright? Now, how about I go to Sartori's hut and see if we can borrow that extra cot she had?" Gabrielle gave a weak smile, but a pounding at the door cut her answer short. Xena rose and pulled open the door to find Ephiny struggling with a tray piled with food and a pitcher in her arms, and a wineskin thrown over one shoulder. "I figured you two were taking it easy," she entered the room with difficulty and deposited her gifts on the table, "... and, when I didn't see you in the food tent, I thought I'd make a little delivery." She finished with a smile. The Regent's entrance and beaming satisfaction earned a grin from both the women. The food did smell delicious, Gabrielle's stomach had decided, and chose that moment to make itself known. "Timing is everything, Eph," Xena said, pulling out a chair and motioning Gabrielle into it. "You had better feed that monster." She said to the bard with a smile. "I have a couple of errands to do, you two enjoy yourselves," Xena said as she snatched a couple olives from the tray and popped them into her mouth. "Xena, I didn't mean for you to leave--" Ephiny began, looking from Gabrielle to the tall warrior. "I need to check on Argo, anyway... she's probably got an attitude going
considering the way I left her when we rode in here." Xena picked up her weapons and attached her chakram to her belt, moving to stand beside Gabrielle. "Will you be allright?" the warrior asked, lowering her voice so that Ephiny barely heard it. Gabrielle nodded and Xena turned toward the door. "Hey, warrior," Gabrielle called out. Using her left hand she awkwardly threw an apple toward Xena, the taller woman catching the fruit before she had barely turned around to look. "Make sure you tell Argo it's from me." She smiled. Xena threw the red orb into the air and caught it again without looking. "She'll know... you always did say she'd follow the first pretty face with an apple!" Xena threw the apple in the air once more and walked out the door. "Well, a couple days sleep seems to have done a lot for the Warrior Princess' attitude." Ephiny stated as she sat across from the young Queen. "You should have seen her when she brought you in." "I guess we must have made quite a sight," Gabrielle said quietly. "I suppose the whole village saw me--" "Gabrielle... as far as the Amazon village is concerned, you and Xena ran into some rough characters on the road. Besides Sartori, Eponin and I are the only ones who know... well, who know about what happened." Gabrielle just stared at the table, an uncomfortable silence hanging between the two friends. Of course, the young Queen's stomach rumbled noisily, eliciting a grin from the two women. "Eat first..." Ephiny smiled, pouring a glass of cider for the Queen, "... talk later." The Regent kept Gabrielle's mind busy for two solid candlemarks filling her in on the latest village news and gossip, while they ate. Clearing the tray away, Ephiny filled two cups of wine from the skin she had brought and she
leaned back into her chair. "So, now we talk," the Regent said. "I thought that's what you've been doing!" Gabrielle laughed. "That's right... now it's your turn." Ephiny said seriously. Gabrielle's features took on a panicked look, "Xena and I just went though this, Eph... I'm just not ready to go into it yet. Please, I just can't... not yet." "You mean, you haven't talked with Xena about this either? I would think there wouldn't be anything you couldn't talk to your lover--" "We're not lovers." Gabrielle stated flatly. "Oh. I mean... well, I guess I just... assumed..." Ephiny let the statement drift off. I don't believe it! Not the way Xena looks at her. "Most people do." Gabrielle interjected. The young Queen couldn't stop the tears that welled up in her emerald eyes. "Remind me to play cards with you some time." Ephiny smirked. "What's that supposed to mean?" Gabrielle questioned. "That means, my dear friend, that either you are a hideous liar... or you wear your heart on your sleeve." The Regent finished, gently taking Gabrielle's hand in her own and reaching over to brush a few errant tears away from the young woman's cheeks. "You're in love with her, though, aren't you?" "What difference does it make now... after what's happened," Gabrielle said harshly as she pulled herself to her feet. She slowly moved to the window and took a deep breath of fresh air. "What in Tartaurus is that supposed to mean? Gabrielle..." The Regent crossed the room to stand in front of the Queen. "If Xena were in love with
you, do you actually think what's happened to you would affect the way she feels about you?" Gabrielle shrugged her shoulders, not meeting Ephiny's gaze. "And if the roles were reversed? If this had happened to Xena... would it change the love you have for her?" "Of course not!" Gabrielle demanded. "Yet, you have so little regard for her integrity... the woman you profess to love, that you would throw away an opportunity at happiness for the both of you, without even giving her a chance?" Ephiny's words hit the wall Gabrielle had so carefully constructed around her psyche and she felt her control begin to slip. "There's more you're not telling me, isn't there?" Ephiny said, placing gentle fingers under the young Queen's chin, and forcing their eyes to meet. Gabrielle nodded as tears slid down her bruised face. Ephiny pulled her friend into her arms and directed her toward the bed where they could both sit. Gabrielle hadn't meant to reveal her nightmares of the Warlord Xena, the terrifying apprehension at Xena's touch or the images that now tormented her waking moments as well as when she slept, but the comforting embrace of her friend had the words tumbling out of the bard's mouth. Ephiny held the young woman until she had no more tears to shed. "Xena was right... I do feel a little better after a good cry." Gabrielle admitted. "She cares a lot about you, Gabrielle... you should at least give her a chance to love you." "That's only a dream, Eph. Honestly, what could the great Warrior Princess possibly see in me?"
Ephiny grinned and began using her fingers to count. "Let's see... you're beautiful, intelligent, caring, beautiful, compassionate, funny, talented, and did I mention beautiful?" Gabrielle smiled sadly and reached her fingers up toward her face. "Yea, right... I know I look like a raccoon, even if Xena won't tell me!" She said, referring to the dark bruises under her eyes. "Yes, but raccoons are very cute. Besides I bet Xena sees you through loves eyes. "You're the second person that mentioned that phrase to me. I think Sartori said something about loves eyes the other day." Gabrielle had slept so much since then she couldn't quite remember the specifics. "I think you should get to know Sartori when you have the time. You might find the two of you have a great deal in common." Gabrielle saw the flicker of what she thought was the knowing of a secret in the Regent's eye, but dismissed the thought. Gabrielle stifled a yawn and grinned sheepishly. "It's not the company, Eph, I swear." "I've stayed too long already and you need some rest. Will you be allright?" Ephiny asked, rising to leave. "Seems I get asked that a lot lately... yea, I'll be fine. How much worse can things get, right? I mean, I'm hopelessly in love with a woman that the whole Amazon nation wants to sleep with and where do we go... Amazonia." Ephiny laughed out loud, and leaned toward her friend conspiratorially. "Not the whole Amazon Nation, Gabrielle... only half. The other half wants to bed you!" Enjoying the blush that began to creep up the Queen's neck, the Regent winked before closing the door behind her. * * *
Days turned into weeks as Xena and Gabrielle took part in the daily routine of the village. Xena occupied her days taking her turn at patrol and hunting. Every morning she went to the practice field to go through her own drills, taking time to spar with students anxious to learn from the warrior. Evenings were usually spent alone with Gabrielle, listening to the bard make up new stories. Gabrielle spent most of her day acting in her official capacity as Queen. Ephiny was always at her side and Gabrielle thanked Artemis for such a Regent. The days were filled with council meetings, treaty negotiations, and generally ruling on every aspect of Amazon life. The Queen had gotten in the habit of rising early to watch Xena on the practice field, something that surprised the dark-haired woman. The bard never tired of watching the warrior run through her drills. The days were the only time Xena left Gabrielle alone, although the bard didn't realize that fact. Wherever the young Queen went, Xena silently followed, determined never to leave Gabrielle unprotected again. Xena knew that the Royal Guard never left their Queen unattended until she was safely within Xena's sights again in the evening. Gabrielle learned that she could keep the horrific images of her nightmares at bay by keeping her mind busy. She had started out by telling Xena a story to pass the time and soon realized that she hadn't shuddered at Xena's touch once during the whole tale. So, it became a habit to retire to their hut early, Gabrielle weaving one tale after another until sleep claimed the two women. Gabrielle still had the nightmares, however. Every night a little different, but always Xena as her attacker. After one full moon had passed, Sartori removed the splint on Gabrielle's right arm. By this time the young Queen had managed to train her body against waking up screaming from the nightmares. When she woke in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat, she would head outside under the stars. Once her splint had been taken off, Gabrielle took this time to practice the strengthening exercises Xena had shown her. Eponin had told her to start drilling with her staff to build her
arm up and increase the mobility in her wrist. So, each night, sometimes two and three times in one night, Gabrielle awoke and headed outside to drill. Sometimes she would go to the stable and visit with Argo, receiving a friendly nicker of welcome. Usually it was less than a candlemark or so, but Xena always knew she was gone. The warrior would quietly follow the young woman, just to keep her out of harms way. So after two full moons of this late night activity, both the Queen and the warrior began to develop dark circles under their eyes from interrupted sleep. Gabrielle had taken Ephiny's advice and begun to get to know Sartori. The young Healer had a dry wit that Gabrielle could appreciate. Gabrielle learned that the Healer had a bondmate, but that she was in the northern territories and wouldn't be back for some time yet. She was also a Healer, but all Sartori would say was that Adia, her mate, healed "differently" than she did. Gabrielle could see the love between the two in Sartori's eyes when she talked of Adia. The Queen wondered if her face used to look that way when she spoke of Xena. The young Queen had become a different woman than she had been. Where she had been open and honest with a quick smile, now she had become a great deal like her warrior... burying certain emotions, keeping them held down by sheer force of will. Of course, there was a price. Gabrielle didn't smile quite as often, nor did she chatter on endlessly about nothing. Now care had to be taken before she spoke or thought. Prudence had to be exercised so as not to reveal too much of herself, lest she lose her hard fought control. Gabrielle had found a place to go when everything seemed to press in on her. It was a beautiful little pond where dragonflies with iridescent wings buzzed just atop the water. There was a small outcrop of rock that hung over the water's edge. Gabrielle would lay on her belly and watch the fish swim by and then roll over and try to imagine shapes in the clouds until she had pushed the demons of shame and self loathing down far enough to control. Gabrielle was still plagued by feelings she wouldn't even admit to Ephiny or Sartori, especially not Xena. The young woman felt that she had somehow
provoked her own attack. She berated herself for her provocative choice of clothing, for not going to a village to stay... a thousand things she went over and over about that day. If she had bothered to tell anyone about these feelings, they could have told her how very wrong she was, and perhaps they could have even made her understand. But, Gabrielle felt too ashamed and guilty to reveal these thoughts to anyone, so she came down to this pond when the feelings started to drag her into the abyss. Even though it seemed as if she was by herself, she was the Queen, after all. There were always at least one or two of the Royal Guard hidden amongst the branches ready to protect their Queen if needed. * * *
"I thought I might find you here," Sartori said, sitting cross-legged next to Gabrielle on the rocks. "Caught playing hooky." Gabrielle rolled over on her back and folded her hands under her head. Sartori watched dark shadows pass across Gabrielle's eyes, the young woman closing them and breathing deeply. Perhaps 2 heartbeats passed before the she saw Gabrielle open her eyes again and the Healer was met with the familiar sparkling green. Gods, she's getting good at that, pushing all her feelings away. Sartori silently prayed to Artemis that she was about to do the right thing... after all, she couldn't heal this part of the body like Adia could. "Eponin is fond of saying that it's rough at the top, My Queen. If that's true, I suppose you deserve to play hooky once in a while." Gabrielle smiled, not at the statement, but of Sartori's use of her title. No matter how many times she asked her new friend to call her Gabrielle, she was still address with formality by the Healer. The Queen had finally quit asking, but it still made her smile. Kind of like a game they played, for what
reason she didn't know. "Today's the day," Sartori said with a smile. "Adia returns home today... she should be here by mid-morning. "Oh, Sartori, that's wonderful." Gabrielle sat up and tucked one leg underneath her. "I know how much you must have missed her." "I feel as if my heart has been placed on a shelf just waiting for her return." Sartori mused as she pulled her legs up to her chin, wrapping her arms around them. "Even now I wonder what she possibly sees in me... it's evidently something I'm not aware of." "Ah, loves eyes." Gabrielle said, remembering. "You said that to me once, remember?" "It's an enigma that I can only explain with that phrase." Sartori rested her chin on the top of her knees and pulled the hood of her cloak back. Gabrielle watched as the young Healer absently stroked the angry scar that ran the length of her face. "I understand what you've gone through more than you realize, My Queen. I came to the Amazon Village when I was 11 seasons. My own village had been burned and raided, my family slaughtered like sheep in the field. I was raped by 3 soldiers." Tears had begun to slowly creep down Sartori's cheeks, but her eyes held a distant look as if she were reliving the nightmare of that day. Gabrielle ached to do or say something for one whose pain was so familiar to her own, but she sat silent and let the Healer continue. "The last soldier, who took me, gave me this," she again fingered the long scar. "I remember his words as if it were just yesterday. He told me that no one would want me now that I had been used, then right before he cut me he said that this would guarantee I could never be loved." Gabrielle hung her head and let her own tears fall. For her new friend's
torment as well as her own. She knew what that fear felt like... knowing you would never know love. The two women sat that way for a long time, the only sound between them were their quiet sounds of weeping. Sartori broke the silence first. "I don't even remember how I came to be here. Ramti, the village healer, took me in. That's how I developed my healing skills. Even Amazon children can be cruel, though. I took to wearing a cloak and hood so I wouldn't stand out so much." "Did Adia already live in the village?" Gabrielle couldn't help interjecting. "No," Sartori smiled now at this part of the story. "She came from a tribe far to the North for an Inter-Tribal festival one summer. As when any group of stranger's get together, the warriors seemed to gather with other warriors, royalty with royalty. Well, that's how Adia and I met. I was seventeen that summer. I had spent 6 seasons building walls around myself so I couldn't be hurt. I think the biggest hurt came from convincing myself that what that soldier had told me was true. That because of the way I looked, that I had been raped, I could never be attractive enough to be loved. Adia was the most beautiful woman I had ever laid eyes on. I couldn't understand why she followed me around, it seemed as if she just kept "accidentally" running into me. I guess I was pretty naïve." She grinned sheepishly at Gabrielle. "One afternoon I was meditating in the woods and, of course, Adia said she just happened to be going for a walk. I think even she realized how lame that sounded, she started laughing and she sat down and started telling me how incredible she thought I was. I think my heart was ready to pound out of my chest. Then she pulled my hood down. She did it do softly, her eyes were so captivating that I barely knew she had done it until it was off. I think I panicked for a moment and tried to push her away, but she just held me there, staring into my eyes. I felt, as if she could see into my very soul, but I knew once she saw what was there, she would be repulsed. Then do you know what this woman said to me?"
"Tori, you have the most beautiful gray eyes I've ever seen." Sartori unconsciously reached up to touch her scar, but Adia's fingers pushed them aside and tenderly caressed the length of her jaw, moving her face closer until Sartori could feel the other woman's breath on her lips. "You'll have to tell me about that sometime... when you're ready," Then their lips met in a kiss that promised a lifetime more to come. "I'd never been kissed before, My Queen, but if I had been kissed a thousand times I would have still said that, until that kiss, I had never been kissed before. She held me in her arms and we stayed that way all day, she never stopped telling me how in love with me she was. Then, she kissed my forehead and told me to sleep. I didn't tell her that I hardly ever slept because I was afraid, I still had the nightmares of that day. But, lying there in her arms I did sleep, and I had the nightmare as always. This time Adia was there, in my dream. She saved me... I was never raped... I never received this," she said motioning to the scar on her face. "It was the most amazing emotion I had ever experienced, waking up from that dream, such a feeling of peace. I knew, in my head, that my past hadn't changed, but my heart felt that the experience never happened. I tried to tell Adia and she smiled and kissed me and said she knew. That's when she told me about her gift. She was a dreamscape healer. She told me that she usually just created an environment where someone you love could enter your dream and help you heal yourself. This time, she wanted to be the one." "Adia told me I was beautiful and I felt she believed it. She saw me, not as others do, but through love's eyes. When I looked into her eyes I saw my own reflection, and there, in her gaze, I was once again innocent and clean... in her eyes I was beautiful." Gabrielle looked up and saw this young Healer as her lover saw her. "Sartori... you are beautiful."
The Healer looked at her Queen for the first time since she'd started relating her tale and smiled brightly. "You looked right past my scars, the first time we met... perhaps that is your gift." "Love's eyes..." Gabrielle mused aloud. "I wonder if it's always that easy?" "Nothing in life worth having is ever easy, My Queen. It took a huge leap of faith for me to believe in what I saw reflected in Adia's eyes. Believing she could love me was the hardest test I ever took." "Sartori... could Adia heal my dreams?" Gabrielle whispered, not allowing her heart to hope. "I believe she would try, your highness." Sartori breathed a silent sigh of relief. She saw behind Gabrielle's features, watching the silent struggle waged from within. She asked Artemis for strength for her Queen's warrior. She felt Xena would need it to fight the demons that tormented the Queen. "Tori?" Sartori's head snapped around at the sound of her name. Gabrielle knew immediately who the tall stranger behind them was by the look on the Healer's face. Sartori's countenance lightened, her smile reaching her eyes quickly. She jumped off the rock and into the tall stranger's arms in one leap. Sartori hadn't lied. Adia was truly one of the most beautiful women Gabrielle had ever seen. Dressed in trousers and tunic with knee high riding boots she looked more like a warrior than a healer. Her hair was the color of Xena's, her straight locks falling to just below her ears, slightly wind blown from riding. Ironically she was also every bit as tall as Gabrielle's warrior. Her eyes were a deep green flecked with gold. Adia came to where Gabrielle still sat and came down to one knee, placing her hand over her heart. "My Queen, forgive the intrusion. I am Adia, bondmate to Sartori..." She said, rising and placing an arm around Sartori's waist. "... I haven't seen this beautiful creature for five moons...
and I couldn't wait another moment." "Please, Adia... call me Gabrielle. Five moons is a long time to be away from the one you love," Gabrielle agreed. "It feels as if it's been half my life." Adia answered, staring at Sartori. Gabrielle watched the tall Healer and the gentle touches she placed on Sartori's face. She began to feel like a third wheel and rose to leave. "Well, I need to get back to work... it was a pleasure meeting you, Adia." "My-I mean, Gabrielle... please don't leave on my account." Adia apologized. "No, I've been away far too long already, it has nothing to do with you. Besides if I don't get back to the village I'm sure Ephiny will hear about it from the Guard." Gabrielle said, pointing into the trees. "I'm not supposed to know they're there." She whispered, winking. The two women promised not to reveal the Queen's secret as she left them. Turning back to look at the pair, Gabrielle saw Adia wrap Sartori in powerful arms and the two shared a soul-searing kiss. The Queen quickly turned away and continued walking, feeling as if she were intruding on a private moment. Witnessing the proof of love's eyes, Gabrielle thought of Xena and walked back to the village with a feeling like apprehension in her heart. She had given up the concept of hope, but in one morning, the smallest spark was lit within her battered heart. And so the first barrier fell. Gabrielle had just finished one of her funnier tales. It was a comedy of errors and it always made Xena laugh, this time was no exception. "I guess I should scribe that one so you can pull it out and read it whenever you need a good laugh," Gabrielle said as she poured the both of them a cup of wine.
"It wouldn't be the same without you telling it," the warrior looked up, smiling. She had been repairing a buckle on her leg armor and sat crosslegged on her cot. Gabrielle smiled back and crossed the room, handing Xena a cup of the wine. "Thanks," Xena said, placing the armor to one side and leaning up against the wall. Gabrielle had no idea how to begin this conversation, but just wade in came to mind. "Xena," Gabrielle began, "... do you think I'm pretty?" Xena nearly spit the mouthful of wine back out. Gaia, where did that come
from? "Gabrielle... you've had plenty of people tell you that, I'd think you'd know it by now." Xena tried to make light of the question, wondering where in the world the bard was going with this. Gabrielle leaned down to sit in front of the cot where Xena relaxed. Sitting with both legs tucked under her, she rested her arms on the cot in front of her. "But... am I still pretty," she said barely above a whisper, forcing herself to keep eye contact with the warrior. Xena knew what the bard meant. Even after she had been raped... would someone still want her? Oh, someone does, Gabrielle. The warrior wanted nothing more than to hold the bard in her arms, kiss her for all she was worth, and tell her exactly how pretty she thought she was. She couldn't find the courage, not until the warrior could touch Gabrielle without causing her to flinch or pull back in fright. No matter how much Xena wanted it. No, she would enjoy what her bard was able to offer, and settle for that. Xena furrowed her brow and stared long and hard at Gabrielle, the azure eyes attempting to convey to the young woman what her voice could not.
"Gabrielle... you're more than just pretty... you're beautiful." "I guess I just--" "I know." Xena answered understandingly. "Gabrielle, nothing has happened in the past... or ever will happen, that could possibly make you look anything but beautiful in my eyes." Xena's eyes never left the bard's. Gabrielle found herself caught up in the blue depths, swirling around her like a whirlpool. Desperate to see her reflection there and know the truth. Are they love's eyes, Xena? Gabrielle placed a hand on Xena's knee, "Thank you," was all the bard could say. * * *
Gabrielle sat bolt upright in bed, shivering as sweat poured from her lithe, muscular frame. She quickly glanced at Xena, lying on a cot across the room. Once the bard had stilled the pounding of her heart, she listened for the steady even breaths that would indicate the warrior still slept. Gabrielle rose and pulled her boots on, pausing to splash some water on her face. She grabbed her staff and slipped through the door without a sound. It had become a sixth sense for Xena, being able to keep track of her bard. She knew the moment the nightmare started. Gabrielle's nightmares had become so much a part of their nights, she could tell exactly when they would start. She heard the bard's sharp intake of breath, pointing out the fact that she had released her self from her dreamscape. Gods, she's gotten good at that... barely a sound. Xena forced her breathing to slow, not moving a muscle till she heard Gabrielle slip outside. Xena slid among the shadows as Gabrielle walked towards the stable. Slipping inside, the bard moved to the center of the building and began
some stretching exercises before she began to twirl her staff in a set of complicated drills. Effortlessly Xena worked her way into the loft to watch. The young woman and the patterns she wove through the air with her staff mesmerized the warrior. Xena had never even seen some of those moves before. Gabrielle's muscles rippled and flowed throughout her limbs as she moved without stopping for nearly a full candlemark. Finally the young woman stopped and stood motionless in the middle of the stable. Her chest heaved from the exertion, muscles quivering, and streams of sweat soaking her shift. Gabrielle just stood there, head thrown back, attempting to catch her breath. Xena simply stared at the young women as if caught in a spell. By the Gods! The warrior was thankful for the bard's loud gasps, as they covered up the fact that she was literally panting. The tightness in her loins was followed by the trickle of wetness that began to run down her thigh. Xena rolled over onto her back simply to take her eyes off of Gabrielle. She brought her breathing under control, pushing down the carnal images that ran through her mind. Gabrielle was soaked to the skin, but satiated in some odd way. She walked to the back of the stable and entered Argo's stall, the mare whinnied at her arrival. "Sorry, no apple tonight, my friend," she patted the horses neck, reaching in to hug the golden beast. The bard grabbed a brush and gently smoothed the mare's coat. If Xena had only known that the bard came to talk with Argo every night, to tell the silent animal her secrets, the warrior would have learned of Gabrielle's fears moons ago. As was the young woman's habit she told Argo what she felt she could tell no other, and tonight was no exception. "Even if it was love's eyes, it wouldn't matter, would it, Argo?" Gabrielle brushed the mare and whispered to her so softly it was only because of Xena's unnatural hearing, she was able to listen to the bard. "What would they say if they knew it was my fault? Ephiny... my people... Xena? Would
they be able to forgive me... would she? Oh, Argo I should have never been there! If I'd done what Xena told me... go stay at the inn. Why didn't I? That top, that skirt... how many drunks has Xena fought off because of how I look? I should have just started fighting right away..." The young woman had stopped her brushing and began to cry softly into the golden mare's neck. Xena fought with her own tears as she listened to her bard. The twinge in her chest turned into an agonizing ache, as she listened to Gabrielle's confession. She thinks she deserved it... that it was
her fault!? * * *
Xena had managed to hop through the window of the hut and slip under the covers moments before Gabrielle entered the room. The bard moved noiselessly through the room, but Xena cracked one eye, watching as the young woman stripped the soaked shift from her body. Moonlight fell across the front of the bard's torso and Xena could feel the wetness begin to flow between her legs again. She closed her eyes tight against the vision until she heard the familiar sleep pattern of Gabrielle breathing. Xena knew she wouldn't be able to sleep until she released the tension building between her legs. Glancing once more in the bard's direction, she checked to make sure she was asleep, all the while moving her hand under the covers. She reached up under her shift, fingers slipping between slick folds. Images of Gabrielle, her sweat soaked limbs guiding her Amazon staff, muscles rippling under her shift. Immersing herself completely within this fantasy image, Xena placed two fingers against her opening, her thumb vibrating strongly against her swollen nub. The fingers of her free hand reached up to pinch swollen nipples through the cotton shift, causing an increased flood of liquid between her legs. Her thighs began to tremble as she plunged the two fingers deep inside herself. Three more strokes and she could feel her body tighten and contract around her fingers. Oh, Gods... Gabrielle. Her hips arched into her orgasm, the only sound, a
ragged exhale from the warrior. Once the tremors had stopped completely, Xena was able to think clearly. She had been able to go so long, but seeing Gabrielle tonight had caused her to lose all control. She lay back on the cot, listening to the sounds of her bard's breathing, replaying in her mind the words Gabrielle had whispered in the stable. Xena knew what she had to do now, but there was only one flaw, as she saw it, in her plan... ... Gabrielle would probably never forgive her. * * *
Xena found Gabrielle in the food hut that morning. The warrior had been gone already when Gabrielle awoke, which wasn't unusual. The Queen had her breakfast and was just enjoying a cup of tea with Eponin and her new recruit, Tarazon, before heading to the training field to watch Xena spar. "I'm glad I caught up with you," Xena said with a hint of mischief before sitting next to Gabrielle. "What do you say to helping me train some of your recruits with the staff today? I figured since your almost better than I am with that thing you might want to help me put on a sparring display." Gabrielle wasn't sure Xena was talking to her with the request until the warrior stood and said, "So, how about it, Gabrielle? Meet me on the field in, say, two candlemarks?" "Yea," Gabrielle said nodding her head, "Yea, I think I'd enjoy kicking your butt in front of my subjects." Gabrielle teased. Xena walked away still laughing out loud. Forgive me, Gabrielle. * * *
Once word got around that The Queen was going to conduct a sparring match with the Warrior Princess, it was no longer just the trainees on the practice field, practically the whole village turned out to watch. Ephiny's words were true, half of the nation drooled after the dark-haired warrior, but the other half lusted after their young Queen. Both women had warmed up and stood facing one another within the sparring circle. Xena in her usual leathers and armor, while Gabrielle wore her Amazon leathers. It was a tiny bit unnerving for Xena to see Gabrielle in bracers and shoulder armor, her biceps showing the results of her nightly drills. The two women stepped to the center of the circle and lightly touched staffs. They both backed off into a fighting stance and the show had begun. Xena decided to play aggressor, predictably attacking towards the Queens right side, knowing that had been her broken arm. Of course, the warrior knew what the rest of the village didn't... that Gabrielle's broken bones were probably twice as strong now as they ever were. Xena quickly realized the truth in her earlier words; Gabrielle was almost better than she was. The Queen followed Xena's lead through a complex series of hand over hand moves and suddenly the Queen was the aggressor. The warrior found herself moving backward, beginning to actually tire, as she had to leap over Gabrielle's numerous leg sweeps. Gods, Gabrielle's good! Just when Gabrielle's confidence was building, Xena's battle cry rang out as she sprung into the air, somersaulting over the young woman's head. Most foes were surprised by this maneuver, however Gabrielle had fought in hundreds of battles, large and small, with the warrior. As Xena was in mid-air, Gabrielle grabbed the end of her staff and spun around. Just when the warrior was at her most vulnerable, as she was landing, Gabrielle's staff knocked the warrior's feet out from under her. The Queen watched, however, that as soon as Xena's back hit the ground, she used the momentum to flip right back onto her feet. Gods, Xena's good! Of course this spin had left Gabrielle open and the warrior took the
opportunity to tell her so. "I could have had you there, My Queen... is that what you did to lose in the woods outside Pelios?" It was only reflex that kept Gabrielle's movements going, when her mind froze. She couldn't have possibly said that. Xena continued her jabs, but she lightened the force, knowing that Gabrielle was still trying to register what the warrior had said. " Is that outfit meant to distract me, or just tease me?" Gabrielle swung wildly with that statement and pulled herself off balance. She nearly stopped, but Xena slowed with her, enough to keep her fighting. "Xena, what are you trying to do?" Gabrielle pleaded. "Win, My Queen... or don't you believe we all get what we deserve?" Xena momentarily felt as if she had overplayed her hand. Some Amazons at the perimeter of the circle eyed one another at the warrior's words, while the Royal Guard shifted nervously, not knowing if this was a part of the planned battle or not. "Come on, Gabrielle... you're not going to try to tell me it wasn't your fault, are you? You're a tease and you know it." Xena purred. Gabrielle stopped completely at that, her knuckles white as she tightly gripped her staff, struggling with her emotions. "You must have done something..." Xena heard the sound of all six of the Royal Guards swords being freed from their scabbards. They knew there was something wrong now. Ephiny could hear the exchange, but didn't immediately realize the truth of the matter. Once it dawned on her what Xena was doing, she recognized that the warrior was playing a very dangerous game. With a wave of her hand, Ephiny held back the Guard, and with one whispered sentence, she
had Solari start to disperse the onlookers. Gabrielle realized none of this, however. She was only cognizant of two things. The first was the anger that in seconds would no longer be able to be pushed down. The second was that Xena was the cause of that anger. Come on, Gabrielle... you and I both know it's true... you must have done something." "Noooo!" Gabrielle screamed. So quick that Xena barely had time for the block, Gabrielle's staff came at her midsection. Left, right, left in rapid succession. She anticipated the next right to her ribs, but she committed herself too soon and Gabrielle went for the kill shot. The right that Xena had planned to block at her ribs swung high instead and connected with a sickening crack to the side of Xena's face. The warrior's head snapped back, and while the force of the blow would have broken a man's jaw, Xena dropped to one knee, the staff falling from her hands. The ground spun up at her and she thought she was about to lose the contents of her stomach. Her eyes closed, fighting down the nausea, she heard Gabrielle. "It wasn't my fault! I didn't do anything wrong!" The young Queen screamed hysterically, raising her staff to finish the warrior. Xena swallowed hard and pulled her eyes up to meet Gabrielle's. The warrior tried to muster all the love that was in her heart for her bard in that one look. "That's right, Gabrielle... you didn't do anything wrong." She said softly. It took a moment for Gabrielle to grasp the affirmation spoken, but when she did, Xena's words from long ago came back to her.
... When you least expect it, it'll hit you and knock you flat... unless you deal with it.
And so it had. "I didn't do anything wrong..." Gabrielle whispered, more a statement than a question. She stared at the upraised staff in her grasp, letting it fall from her grip, sinking to her knees. "No, Gabrielle... you most certainly did not." The cries and sobs that were torn from the young Queen's throat sounded inhuman. Xena pulled the bard to her as Gabrielle clutched her friend as if to keep from falling into the pits of Tartaurus. Quite some time later, there were only two figures left on the practice field. "Gabrielle," Xena whispered, stroking the young woman's hair. Gabrielle looked up at the warrior through red, tear filled eyes. Xena gave the bard a lopsided grin. "Would you stop hitting me in the head... it's starting to hurt." And so the second barrier fell. * * *
By the next morning the skin around Xena's right jaw was streaked blue and purple, from her ear to her chin. Gabrielle cringed when she looked at the warrior, realizing she was responsible for the nasty looking bruise. She had never felt so completely and utterly out of control as she had out on that field. She had "lost" it, but Xena kept telling her that was a good thing. She had to admit, she felt lighter somehow. It didn't stop the nightmares,
though. Xena noticed a change in Gabrielle immediately. The young woman had actually begun to look people in the eye. It didn't stop her nightmares,
though. Secretly, Xena had hoped the nightmares and sleeplessness would stop instantly; she was wrong. Remembering the previous evening, Xena had felt Gabrielle's nightmare before she heard it. Following Gabrielle had been more of a challenge, since waves of dizziness assaulted Xena with every step. She was able to keep up, however, and soon they both slept the dreamless sleep of the truly exhausted. "Xena, I'm not sure I can do this," Gabrielle hesitated just beyond the entrance to the food hut. This was going to be the first time she had seen any of the villagers since the incident the day before. "You are Queen of the Amazon Nation, Gabrielle... you've done nothing to hang your head about. Besides..." the warrior continued, straightening her leathers and putting on a regal air, "... if I have to walk in there after I got my butt kicked by a short, blonde bard, the least you could do is back me up!" Gabrielle laughed and looked at the warrior with affection borne of admiration and respect. Xena held out her arm and whispered, "you don't have to touch me if it bothers you too much." Disregarding the warrior's fear, the young Queen placed her hand over the warrior's bracer. "Onward, my Champion," she smiled nervously. The hut was very nearly filled and, as the two women made their way through the large building, conversations started to dwindle and die. The room was almost completely silent by the time The Queen and her Champion had procured hot mugs of tea and taken a seat at the Queen's table. Ephiny jumped up from the Queen's seat as soon as she had seen Gabrielle walk into the building, moving to the other end of the table. Once Gabrielle was seated, Xena moved to the Queen's left and stood silently behind Eponin, claiming this first seat on the left as the Queen's Champion. Eponin silently moved down, unable to meet the warrior's gaze. It seemed the village waited to see what would go on at the Queen's table before continuing with their own conversations. Ephiny, Eponin, Solari,
Sartori, and Adia all sat motionless at the small table. It was Adia that broke the stall. Whether the Healer decided to throw caution to the wind and take her life into her hands or if she was just that naïve regarding the Warrior Princess no one ever knew. "Warrior..." Adia leaned toward Xena, but her voice could easily be heard throughout the hut. She gazed at Xena with a mixture of sympathy and total innocence. "Perhaps, you should learn to duck." She said very seriously. Xena just sat there with a look of stunned amazement on her face. In fact the whole building held their breaths as the Warrior Princess icily stared down the stranger." "Are you suicidal?" Xena hissed. Then it started. Gabrielle tried to pretend she was clearing her throat, but her quiet laughter was unmistakable to Xena's ears. The warrior slowly turned her head to try an intimidating stare on her companion, but it was lost on the young woman. Gabrielle's eyes met Xena's and the Queen quickly moved her hand up to cover her smile. Eponin was next, snorting into her drink. Solari soon followed. Ephiny tried her best, but even biting her lip couldn't stifle her laughter. Sartori simply covered her hands with her face. All the while Adia kept the innocent, deadpan look trained on Xena. By this time even Gabrielle was laughing out loud. "Who, in Tartaurus, are you?" Xena asked through clenched teeth, unable to think of a graceful way out of the situation. It was at this point that Eponin started laughing so hard she rolled off her stool, which sent the rest of the table into peals of uncontrollable laughter. It was nervous laughter, to be sure, but Xena had only to take one long look at Gabrielle to realize she would let the world laugh at her if only to see that light in her bard's eyes. For Gabrielle, Xena would play the game. "Don't laugh, Ep..." Xena said without looking down at the warrior,
"tomorrow, you fight her!" Eponin's laughter abruptly stopped. Xena took a drink from her mug, turned and winked at her bard, and a new round of laughter broke out at the uneasy look on the Amazon warrior's face. The people in the hut didn't exactly know what happened at the Queen's table, or even what had happened on the practice field the day before, but they knew, or they felt, they were a close knit community once again. * * *
"So... have you talked to Xena yet?" Eponin questioned. "We talk all the time." Gabrielle answered. Continuing to shuffle through parchments set on the table before her. "Yes, but do either of you ever listen?" frustration rang in the warrior's voice. "Ep, what difference does it make anyway?" Gabrielle tossed a scroll down in frustration. "Even if Adia could heal my dreamscape, Xena just doesn't think of me that way!" "Tell me you're not that thick! Xena is so in love with you, her body practically screams it every time she's near you." "Yes, she loves me, but not the way you think. I'm like something she feels she has to protect and care for now." Gabrielle threw back. "Because that's how a warrior treats the woman she loves!" "I just don't see it." Gabrielle continued. "Frankly, I'm getting to the point where I'm not even sure she likes women. I mean, as many times as we've been here, with all these Amazons literally throwing themselves at her feet,
have you ever seen Xena even look twice at any of them... ever?" "Arrrggggghhh!" Eponin groaned, her hands covering her face. "Okay... here's a stretch. Have you ever thought that it might be because she's in-love--with--you?" "You are making me crazy with this! Why are you and Ephiny so obsessed with my love life... or lack of?" Gabrielle began to pace across the floor of the Queen's hut. "Because it's meant to be. Allright... let's look at this logically, then. Gabrielle, have you ever been propositioned by any of the Amazons here. You know, offered a cozy place to spend the evening... the afternoon, whatever?" "Yes," Gabrielle answered slowly, not exactly sure where her friend was going with this. "And???" Eponin looked at her expectantly. "And, nothing... I never have." "Why?" the warrior shot back. "Because I'm in love--, Oh no... I see where this is going, now!" Eponin stopped Gabrielle from walking away from her by dropping to her knees in front of the exasperated Queen. "Do I have to get down on my knees and beg you to open your eyes?" Gabrielle couldn't help laughing as the Amazon warrior grabbed her hand, pulling it to her chest, and pleaded again. "Gabrielle, I'm begging you!" It was at that moment that the door swung open and Xena walked into the hut. The warrior froze at the sight of Eponin on her knees, Gabrielle's hand
in hers. Frankly, the only one who looked truly innocent was Gabrielle. Eponin knew how Xena felt about the Queen so she got a sort of "deer caught in your bow sights" look. Gabrielle wasn't quite sure, later, exactly how to describe the look Xena had on her face. It was a combination of fear, anger, and the distinct look someone gets just before they throw up all over your boots. For some reason Gabrielle began to think this whole situation didn't look too good. She had to tug twice to pull her hand out of Eponin's solid grasp, the warrior still on her knees, swallowing hard at the sight of six feet of Warrior Princess. Eponin would swear later that Xena looks much larger when you're on your knees. Gabrielle suddenly had the overwhelming urge to explain the situation to Xena. "This isn't really what it looks like," she said, punching at Eponin's shoulder to get her to come to her senses and stand up. "It looks like Eponin is in your hut on her knees," Xena commented dryly. "Well, I guess it's exactly what it looks like then." Gabrielle laughed nervously, continuing to punch the Amazon warrior. Eponin did try. She sent a very distinct message to her brain to tell her legs to move, but all she could do was stare up at Gabrielle and say weakly, "I don't think I can move." "Oh, then let me help you," Xena hissed with a feral grin. She crossed the room, one hand grabbing the neck of the warrior's tunic and literally dragging Eponin out the door. With one arm she vaulted the stunned warrior over the porch rail to the ground below. "Xena!" Gabrielle shouted. "Gabrielle, don't let her kill me..." A stunned Eponin begged, lying on the ground.
Gabrielle rushed between the two warriors, her hands on Xena's upper arms. Eponin, by this time, had finally gotten to her feet, backing away. "Gabrielle, move out of my way," Xena tried to move around the bard, but the young woman kept putting herself between Xena and Eponin. "Ep, there's only one thing to do in a situation like this... run!" Gabrielle shouted as her arms slipped from Xena's. Ephiny was one of the onlookers of the little show and had no idea what they were up to now. "Gabrielle... is that Xena chasing Eponin?" "Yea," the Queen said walking back toward her hut, shaking her head. "Don't ask... it's a long story." * * *
Gabrielle had been lying on her bed for nearly a candlemark before she heard the familiar scuff of boots at the door. They stopped and stood there for the longest time until finally the door slowly opened and a raven-haired warrior peered tentatively inside. Smiling, Gabrielle lifted herself up onto one elbow and looked at a very contrite warrior. "You didn't kill her, did you?" "I'm sorry, Gabrielle... I had no right to--" "It's, okay... just a misunderstanding, I'm sure." Gabrielle rubbed her temples. "I guess I gave you that headache, huh? Want me to fix you something for it?"
"No, thanks," she smiled at the warrior. "I promised Adia I'd see her today... I'm sure a walk will clear it right up." "I guess I'll go soak in a hot bath, then." Xena said. "I really am sorry, Gabrielle... I don't know what came over me." "Trying to protect me maybe?" The bard said sweetly. "Yea, I guess that's it." Xena answered, turning away before Gabrielle could see the truth in her eyes. * * *
"Tori said this was a favorite spot of yours," Adia motioned for Gabrielle to sit down. They had walked down to the pond that Gabrielle found so much peace at. "The first step is to be completely honest, Gabrielle. Not only with me, but also yourself. I know you've told me the gist of your nightmare, but I don't ask you to tell me about your dreams... I'd rather enter your dreamscape and see them for myself." The Healer said taking Gabrielle's hand. "You look a little nervous." "I guess I am. It's one thing to tell someone about a nightmare and leave out the parts you find too embarrassing... or terrible to mention, it's another to know someone's there watching you." Gabrielle rubbed her sweat soaked palms on her skirt apprehensively. "It won't be as bad as you think. This time when you enter your dreamscape, I'll be there, but you won't have to experience it as a victim. I want you to stand outside yourself and watch it with me. When you do this the only emotions you feel will be the ones you manufacture from watching someone else... do you feel like you can do that?" The young queen nodded her head.
"Now I want you to lay back, concentrate your mind on the clouds. I want you to think about the person in your dreamscape... think about Xena." It was easier to think of Xena without the violent images coming to mind, when the warrior wasn't in the same room with her. Gabrielle found herself smiling. Had Xena actually been jealous? Why else would she have
gone ballistic on Eponin? Gods, Xena, how I love you! Gabrielle tried to remember how long ago it had been. When had she fallen in love with the stoic warrior? For the life of her, she simply couldn't remember when it began. No momentous, earth shattering event or moment in time. It was as if she had always loved the dark warrior. It seemed so natural and right to the young bard. She had convinced herself that her feelings of love and desire, the unrequited love that burned in her, wouldn't matter, and she could just be happy having Xena love her as a friend. That's why the ache in her heart grew stronger everyday. She had once entertained the notion that maybe... just maybe, with a little help from the Gods, she could make Xena her own. Now, the images that Morpheus brought to her had effectively brainwashed her psyche into fearing the very thing she craved. Adia felt Gabrielle begin to slip away from the mortal realm. Swiftly, before the bard could be claimed completely by Morpheus, the Healer gently grasped her hand, and closed her own eyes. Gabrielle's dreamscape had begun. * * *
Xena lay back in one of the smaller pools in the bathhouse, steam rising around her long figure stretched across the length of the carved basin. I
can't even believe I did that... talk about Gabrielle "losing" it. What could I have been thinking?!
I'm not even sure what it is about you anymore, Gabrielle. You feel like an obsession, but one that I want to go on forever. I find every damn thing you do or say absolutely captivating. If I could keep my hormones under control when I'm around you I'd be content to do nothing more than hold you and enjoy simply being with you for the rest of our lives. Gods, Gabrielle, how I love you! * * *
For some time Adia lay on the outcrop of rocks next to Gabrielle, her hands clasped behind her head. The Healer looked over at the sleeping Queen. It had been so long since she slept without the nightmares that Adia didn't have the heart to wake her too soon. Xena would be the difficult one, though. If the warrior did indeed dream of Gabrielle, as Tori said, then she might be unwilling to allow the Queen to visit her dreamscape. Gabrielle stretched and woke to a feeling she hadn't known in so long... contentment. She rubbed her eyes sleepily, turning toward the Healer. "That was the most incredible experience," she said, shaking her head. "I don't even know how to describe it, but I feel so... so... I don't know, but it's better than I've felt in a long time." Adia smiled and pulled Gabrielle up so they were sitting facing one another. "I'm glad it wasn't too painful for you. I need to warn you right now that you may experience a more intense feeling when you dream tonight because of it, though. It seems that when we prolong the pain of a nightmare, it seems to double up on us later. I just wanted to let you know it's only temporary" Gabrielle nodded at the Healers words.
Now, comes the hard part. "Gabrielle, would you like to ask Xena for her help or shall I?" "Xena? I'm not sure I understand, help for what?" "Gabrielle, when people suffer from unexplainable dreams or are plagued by images of strangers, then I can enter their dreamscape as their champion. Your dreams are filled with someone you love, even more, someone who is already your Champion. Xena will have to be the one to enter your dreamscape and help you. Consequently, you'll enter her dreamscape as part of the healing process." Adia finished quietly. Gabrielle sat staring into her lap. "I can't let Xena see what's in my dreams... it wouldn't be fair, she's done nothing to cause this," the young woman hung her head in defeat. I was so close. "Besides, Xena would never let me see into her nightmares." "Our dreams aren't always nightmares. They don't always have to be unpleasant." Adia said hopefully. "With the Warrior Princess they are." Gabrielle said softly. "Let me talk with her," Adia tried. "No, please, Adia. Promise me you won't say anything to her about this. I'll talk to her." * * *
"No, Gabrielle... it sounds like playing with fire!" Xena paced the room that was becoming smaller to the warrior as the moments went by. "You don't know what you're asking me!" Gabrielle had not intended to even bring the dreamscape healing up. She had pretty much decided she would have to live with the way things were,
but something in her kept remembering the feeling she had wakened with earlier. It was a peace in her heart that she hadn't had in so long. Just the memory of it caused her very soul to ache. Xena was a strong woman, an understanding friend. She acted as if she loved the bard. She would understand the images in Gabrielle's dreams weren't the bard's doing, just the aftermath of her attack. The young woman approached the subject and Xena had immediately gone on the defensive. Xena couldn't believe what was transpiring. After all the pain the two women had already endured, the walking on eggshells, the sleepless nights... after almost having her damn jaw broke! Now, the Gods threw one more irony in the Warrior Princess' face. The only way to heal Gabrielle will be to expose her to thoughts and images Xena herself couldn't control. They had been discussing, which sounded a lot more like arguing to passerby's, this subject for the better part of the evening. Gabrielle was growing tired and Xena just became more agitated, the pacing continuing. If Xena allowed Gabrielle to enter her dreamscape, the bard would be privy to the desirous images that met Xena when she closed her eyes. There would be no way to explain them away and Xena knew their friendship would never be the same, provided the young woman didn't simply send her packing first. Gabrielle had watched the warrior pace back and forth till she was dizzy. She knew what Xena feared. The Destroyer of Nations had ten years worth of nightmares, brutality and horrors that Gabrielle's mind couldn't even begin to conjure up, buried in her dreamscape. She knew Xena did everything she could to keep that past away from the bard. That's why Gabrielle knew what Xena was going to say before the warrior spoke. "I'm sorry, Gabrielle... I just can't." Xena said without looking at her. The warrior turned and walked out into the warm evening air. * * *
It was nearly dawn before Xena returned to the hut the two women shared. Gabrielle lay whimpering in her sleep as Xena came closer and realized the young woman was dreaming. The warrior winced when the bard cried out. Lighting a candle, Xena watched Gabrielle's face in the dim light. Usually her bard scarcely made a sound, so accustomed to the nightmares she had become, but tonight the bard thrashed and cried like the threeheaded hound of Tartaurus was nipping at her heels. Xena hesitated to wake the young woman, but after half a candlemark of the tortured cries the warrior's heart felt as if it were being ripped from her chest. "Gabrielle," Xena called over and over, not touching the bard for fear of frightening the young woman. Gabrielle groaned as she pulled herself from the nightmare's embrace. "Gods..." she panted, looking up at Xena. Her eyes pulled back, but Xena had become used to that. The early morning had a chill that accentuated the goose flesh on Gabrielle's sweat drenched figure. Xena pulled a blanket around the young woman's shoulders and moved to start a fire. The bard wrapped the blanket around her and noticed Xena was completely dressed. She must not have even been to bed yet! Shortly the warrior had two mugs of steaming tea in her hand and she motioned for Gabrielle to follow her. Xena sat on the top step of the porch, Gabrielle arranging herself on the next step, between the warrior's legs. Closeness with Xena came with a price for Gabrielle, but the young woman's nightmare fatigued body was too tired to respond. She settled her back against the warrior's chest and Xena tucked the blanket tightly around her. Apollo's chariot rose into the sky, trailing great streaks of magenta and blue. The trees of the forest looked black, providing a stark foreground to the morning sky's brilliant color. "Beautiful," Gabrielle softly breathed. Yes... beautiful," Xena echoed, seeing only Gabrielle, craning her neck to
watch the sunrise reflected in the bard's eyes. Xena took advantage of the bard's drowsy state, wrapping her arms tightly around the young woman and kissing the top of her head. Once Gabrielle was sleeping soundly in the warrior's arms, she returned the Queen to her bed, the warrior heading off to find Adia's hut. * * *
Now that Xena was sitting in front of the outspoken Healer, she didn't quite know what to say. Pounding on their door at sunrise wasn't the kindest thing to do, but once Xena had decided upon a course of action, she was unstoppable. It had taken seeing Gabrielle this morning, and the pain the young woman suffered with silently, to convince Xena she would do anything to heal her bard. Even if it meant losing her. "Tell me what I need to do," she asked, her clear gaze resting on Adia. "In theory, it's very simple. You and Gabrielle will enter the dreamscape at the same time. I can't say who will cross over into the other's first. The reoccurring dreams will be visited. When the dreamscape has ended, you both return to the mortal realm. You won't be changing the past... only your perception of it. The reality will still be that Gabrielle was raped. Her perception, the way she feels about it, may be as if she heard about it second-hand... or a very old memory." "In theory," Xena repeated. "What about in reality?" "It will be the hardest thing you've ever done, and neither one of you will be the same after. You can change anything about the outcome of the dream, just as if you were actually there. You have to want to though. If some part of the dream appeals to you, on any level, you will be unable to undo its existence. It's a hard thing to face your demons, warrior. It's an even harder one to allow someone you love to face them with you in a realm where you
have no ability to hide your most personal desires and fears. I can't be Gabrielle's Champion that will fall to you. We'll start by entering your dreamscape, just as I did yesterday with Gabrielle." "When do we start?" Xena said, telling herself she was doing this for Gabrielle. "Right now," Adia answered. The Healer instructed Xena to relax and lie back against the cushions and keep her eyes on the beam of sunlight that came sparkling through a stone crystal hanging in the window. Adia's soothing tones relaxed the warrior until her eyelids felt heavy and began to close. "Now, tell me what you dream of, warrior..." Adia said softly. "Gabrielle..." Xena whispered. * * *
"Do these two ever get any sleep on their own," Adia mumbled to herself. As with Gabrielle, she had continued to let the warrior sleep after their session. I think I actually blushed! The tall healer mused, lingering on Xena's dreams. Gaia, will these two ever figure it out? Xena said she had wanted to take care of this today, she didn't want Gabrielle to suffer through one more nightmare. So, by the time Xena woke, Adia was done mixing together the potent combination of herbs needed for their dreamscape session. Xena sat up, watching the Healer move around the large hut. She avoided looking into Adia's eyes when the healer came and sat across from her. "Would it help if I told you I'd seen racier dreams than yours?" But not
many. Xena simply shook her head. "Where do you come up with the things you say?" the warrior smiled sheepishly. "It's late," Xena suddenly looked worried, "I didn't tell Gabrielle where I was going." "It's allright. I sent word letting her know you were here... I hope you don't mind." "No, thank you. Well..." Xena rose, "When should I return with Gabrielle?" "Have your noon meal, then don't eat or drink anything after that. Come back here late this afternoon. And, Xena... it won't matter if you're wearing your armor or not. In the dreamscape whatever you need will be there." Adia watched the warrior walk away. Gabrielle was a lucky woman. * * *
"Xena, are you sure about this?" Gabrielle asked tentatively. "Absolutely," Xena looked back at the young woman. The two sat on the floor of the Healer's hut, surrounded by cushions and furs, sipping the warm drink Adia had made for them. The Healer had given them all the instruction she could and revealed as much to each woman as she dared, before excusing herself from the hut. She explained that she would be back once they were asleep. "It tastes like the tea you make for me when my cycle is so bad." Gabrielle commented. "Raspberries..." Xena answered. "That's what the taste is," she explained in answer to the bard's puzzled look.
"Xena?" "Hmmm?" "I'm scared... Xena, I want you to know, whatever happens... whatever we see... I still... you need to know that--" the bard said faltering. "Yea... me too," Xena said tenderly. "Hey, you getting sleepy?" Gabrielle slowly nodded her head, realizing it was getting hard just to keep her eyes open. "Come here..." Xena said, opening her arms, the familiar warmth of Gabrielle's body settling against her as the bard snuggled into the warrior's embrace. Xena felt Gabrielle's breathing deepen, her own eyelids becoming leaden. Running her fingers through the already sleeping bard's hair, she whispered, "Know one thing, Gabrielle. No matter what you see, I do this because I love you." * * *
Xena stood in a tent that reminded her a lot of her Warlord days. Near the center of the tent two women writhed on a pallet that threatened to collapse at any moment. A fully clothed warrior had begun ripping the garments from the smaller figure under her.
"... it doesn't have to be this way," the bard pleaded. Gabrielle's pleading voice resounded in Xena's ears. Gabrielle?
"Don't pretend, Gabrielle... Isn't this what you wanted?"
"No, it's not what she wants!" Xena hissed grabbing the woman on top of her bard by her hair and tossing her off the prone figure underneath. Xena grabbed the neck of the kneeling warrior's tunic, drawing her muscular arm back for a blow to the face. Gathering momentum for what she hoped would be a single bone-crunching blow. The prostrate warrior flung her head back, shaking a wild mane of hair from her face with an evil grin. "What could you have possibly been thinking?" she drawled slowly. Xena froze. She simply hadn't been prepared for this. It seemed as if candlemarks were rushing by, while the blood of rage dissipated from her body. Gabrielle's nightmare stood toe to toe with her. Her dreamscape attacker... was Xena! In actuality it had only taken a heartbeat for the Warlord Xena to stand and reach out, quick as lightening, and wrap her fingers around her dreamscape twin's throat. Xena clutched at the fingers that held her in death's grip, unable to stop the crushing of her larynx. "Xena!" Gabrielle cried out. Both women's eyes turned in the bard's direction. "Is she the best you could come up with, my pet?" Warlord Xena growled. "You'll have to do better than that. Gods, she's not even the best parts of me. She's simply what was left of me... a whimpering, weak, lovesick fool!" she finished, drawing back with her freehand and landing a blow that broke Xena's nose with it's force. The Warlord continued to rain blows on Xena, never releasing the hold she had around the warrior's throat. "Please... No!" Gabrielle pleaded. The Warlord released Xena, kicking out at her right leg and crushing her kneecap, just before the warrior slumped to the floor. "You know if she dies in here, she dies out there! They didn't tell you that did they?" she directed
her comment toward Gabrielle. "Come here!" The Warlord ordered Gabrielle to her. Gabrielle hesitated and the Warlord pulled a dagger from her boot. Moving behind Xena's slumped, kneeling figure she jerked her head back and placed the blade to the warrior's throat. Gabrielle moved towards the two figures, a blanket held up to cover her body. "You get to decide, my pet. I keep you, and she lives. You resist me... this pathetic excuse for a warrior dies." "Gab... rielle..." Xena tried to rise, but the Warlord struck the hilt of the dagger across her temple, opening a fresh cut, causing more blood to flow into the one eye that wasn't already swollen shut. Grabbing Xena's wrist, the Warlord pulled back sharply and the sound of snapping bones filled the air. "Please! Please... don't hurt her anymore," Gabrielle tearfully begged. "I won't... I won't fight you." The bard hung her head, unable to look into Xena's face. The Warlord unceremoniously dumped Xena's limp body on the floor. Roughly grabbing the bard, she pulled the blanket away from the young woman's naked body. Standing behind the bard, she turned the young woman toward Xena leading her by the hair. "I'll tell you what... you've been so much fun, warrior... I'll let you watch me fuck her." The Warlord finished by jerking Gabrielle's face toward her, taking her mouth in a rough kiss, and biting her lower lip until a thin trickle of blood ran from the bard's mouth. A sound like a tortured growl emanated from the back of Xena's throat as the Warlord threw the bard back onto the cot, propelling the weight of her body on top of her.
Xena crawled with what seemed like agonizing slowness to where she could see Gabrielle's face. Tears streamed from the bard's face.
I'm sorry, Gabrielle. Forgive me. I failed you... I couldn't even defeat myself. If I can't face you with the truth, how can I possibly face myself? The truth... the truth! "Gabrielle," Xena whispered through blinding pain. "Gabrielle..." The bard turned glazed eyes toward the sound of Xena's voice. "Gabrielle... that's not me. You know I'd never do anything like that to you... that's not me. I'd never touch you that way... that's not me." Xena kept repeating the words over and over, her voice growing stronger in her mantra as she spoke the truth in her heart. "That's not me... that's not me... that's not me... that's not me... I love you, Gabrielle." The Warlord Xena howled in frustration as she felt her control of the bard's dreamscape start to slip. Then Gabrielle's mind was filled with the echoes of shrieking rage as the lies of her dreamscape were overcome by the warrior's truth. Suddenly Xena found herself at the campsite where she had found Gabrielle that day...
Argo left the path before Xena even had to pull on her reins. "You know she's close too, don't you girl?" Xena dismounted and pulled the reins over the horse's head, leading the mare toward the campsite. Xena slowed her pace as she neared the camp. It seemed quiet, but since it was midmorning she assumed Gabrielle had only recently climbed out of her bedroll. The warrior allowed herself a smile, remembering the imaginative ways she had come up with to wake a sleepy bard. She's probably down by the stream she thought to herself as she entered the camp.
Xena pulled up as 3 roadmen were confronting Gabrielle, just on the edge of the campsite. The bard held her staff menacingly in front of her. Xena let loose of Argo's reins and made her way up behind the bard. The young bard was anxious to be rid of these goons. Maybe she could talk her way out of this. "Look, I know you guys don't want trouble, and my friend will be back any minute... you might have heard of her... Xena?" "Yesss," Xena practically purred in answer to her name. Gabrielle whipped her body around to see the most wonderful sight on earth. "Xena!" She ran and wrapped her arms around the taller woman's waist. "You don't know how glad I am to see you!" Xena's heart nearly exploded out of her chest at the sweet agony of the dreamscape encounter. "And you, my bard, don't know how very happy I am to see you." Rewarding the bard with one of her sparkling smiles. "Now, boys... what can I do for you?" The Warrior Princess drawled at the roadmen. It was like watching a comedy act as the men ran into each other in their haste to put as much distance between the warrior and themselves. "Yea!" Gabrielle nodded her head, shouting after the would-be attackers. "Guess we showed them, huh?" she said turning toward her companion. "Yea... I guess WE did." Xena smiled, then grabbed the bard in a tight bear hug. "I missed you, Gabrielle." She whispered to the bard * * *
It's over, isn't it? Xena saved me... I know she saved me because I don't have all those pictures in my mind anymore. Okay, so where in Tartaurus am I? I guess if I have no idea where I am, this must be Xena's
dreamscape. The woods looked familiar. It was dark, but the area looked like the same small lake Xena had found trying to look for a shortcut once. It was just a few leagues or so outside of Ambracia. Gabrielle slowly approached the same campsite she and Xena had used. There was a roaring fire going, but Gabrielle was immediately hit by the sounds of someone... no, two someone's, moaning and gasping for air. Gabrielle would be able to place Xena's sounds anywhere, especially the distinct sounds of the warrior being pleasured. More than once she had almost embarrassed both Xena and herself by walking upon the warrior "taking matters into her own hands" so to speak. Gabrielle peered into the campsite and sure enough the warrior lay entwined with another woman on a bedroll not too far from the campfire. It was hard for the bard to tell where one woman ended and the other began, their flesh being so entangled. Xena lay across the figure below her, her raven hair enshrouding the other's face and torso. The warrior straddled the smaller woman's thigh, rocking her hips forward in a slow, sensual grind. A small gasp was drawn from the bard as she backed up into the shadows, not able to remove her eyes from the vision of Xena's flesh, slick with sweat and flushed with desire. Gabrielle found her back against a large tree and she tilted her head up to the stars, pressing her crown into the rough wood. Shutting her eyes tight, she tried to push down the ache that began to develop in the pit of her stomach. It was the same feeling she'd had on the ship, on the way to Ithaca, while she lay in a hammock listening to the sounds of Xena sharing her passion with another. It was as if someone had reached in and pulled her heart from her chest, leaving nothing but a raw emptiness in its place. Her chest throbbed with the anguish of it.
Why couldn't it ever be me, Xena? Gabrielle's gaze was once again drawn to the women within the fire's gentle shadows.
"Oh, yesss," Xena moaned, throwing her head back. Gabrielle felt the sharp intake of breath betray her. Xena's head thrown back in carnal rapture revealed the figure writhing in ecstasy beneath the warrior. The bard beheld her own image, wrapped in Xena's strong embrace. A hiss of breath alerted Xena to the fact the two lovers were not alone. She raised her head and stared hard into the black shadows surrounding them. She knew who observed her, unseen, from the shadows. It was the woman she held in her arms. Not really this one. This woman that fulfilled her every whim and desire wasn't really her bard. Just as Gabrielle had created the dreamscape Warlord Xena, so had the warrior fabricated the bard she shared her passionate evenings with. You know all my secrets now, don't you Gabrielle? Will you still think I'm you're Champion when you wake? Pressing herself further into the darkness, Gabrielle felt sure Xena was looking straight at her. "Gabrielle?" Xena whispered into the dark. "Yes, my love," the bard lying underneath Xena reached up to pull the warrior into a forceful kiss. Pushing the warrior backward, the bard ended up on top of the strong woman's body, her fingers drawing delicate circles around the warriors aching nipples. Finally, the bard let her fingertips brush softly across the erect nubs. "Gods, yesss... Gabrielle." Xena knew she should stop this. She felt Gabrielle watching her from the shadows, but here, too, was Gabrielle and Xena became lost in the physical sensations. The warrior began to feel her blood run hot, drowning in the excitement, not only of the woman making love to her, but also of the knowledge that the real Gabrielle was only several feet away, unable to turn away. Gabrielle had pulled back as far as she could go into the darkness of the forest, but she couldn't take her eyes off her warrior. She watched as the
dreamscape Gabrielle brought the warrior's body to a fevered pitch of excitement, the bard's own nipples hardening in response to what she saw. She watched Xena breath deeply, closing her eyes. The dreamscape bard began pinching and pulling Xena's nipples, the warrior gasping, arching her body into the rough touch.
By the Gods, Xena! Am I the one... the one you dream of in passion? Is this what you want? Am I what you want? "I'm going to take you." The twin said, looking down at the warrior, green eyes filled with burning desire. "Yes... please," Xena moaned. Gabrielle felt her own undergarments become thoroughly soaked as she saw her twin push three fingers deep inside Xena. Gabrielle stayed there, hidden and covered in the darkness of the trees while the dreamscape bard took the warrior in such forceful and commanding ways such as the genuine bard had been afraid to do in her own fantasies. Gabrielle watched Xena's face intently as the warrior's last orgasm ripped through her satiated body. The real Gabrielle would never forget the look of absolute bliss on her warrior's face at that moment, trying to memorize it, as if she could burn it into her soul to keep forever.
They were love's eyes, weren't they, Xena? Oh, but why, my love, wouldn't you ever tell me? * * *
Finally Adia's herbs began to lose their effectiveness and the dreams ended for both women. Their physical bodies continued to sleep in a dreamless state into the night, their minds at rest. The warrior continued to hold the bard until Apollo's chariot again made his way heavenward.
The healer's words to Xena had been true.
"It will be the hardest thing you've ever done, and neither one of you will be the same after. Xena had been sitting there staring at Gabrielle for quite some time. The bard looked so peaceful, Xena knew her dreamscape must have been healed. The young woman, dark eyelashes fluttering slightly, had the corners of her mouth curled up in a slight smile. The warrior forced herself to turn away, wondering how she would explain, what she could say to account for her actions to Gabrielle. Gabrielle woke lying on her side, wrapped in a soft fur. She didn't have to look long to find the warrior. Xena sat cross-legged next to the bard, absently biting her lip, staring down at her hands clasped loosely in her lap. The warrior raised her eyes when she heard Gabrielle stir. Gabrielle saw faint vestiges of pain in the haunted blue gaze of her friend.
Oh, Xena, your dream wasn't an expression of love for me at all, was it? You had no more control over in Morpheus' realm than I did, that's why you look as if your heart is breaking. A hurt so intense she could scarcely keep it from showing passed through the bard. I was so close. Still, she loved this woman with all her heart, and desperately wanted to ease the warrior's fears. Holding in tears that threatened to burst through, Gabrielle got to her knees and threw her arms around Xena's neck. "Thank you, Xena... I knew you'd save me." Xena's stomach flipped over at the touch of Gabrielle's arms around her. For a brief moment she thought Gabrielle was about to kiss her. The bard's eyes took on the soft gaze of love and Xena could have sworn she saw her own reflection in the green depths. When Gabrielle spoke and thanked her, the warrior knew the truth. What about my dream, Gabrielle? I guess I
have my answer, don't I? Guess you think if we don't mention it, it never
happened. Gabrielle could do nothing but cling to Xena and pray that she was getting her message across to the warrior. No matter what, they would always be there for each other. I love you Xena, and I'll take whatever you have to
offer. If it's only as your friend, so be it. Xena felt the bard's hold grow stronger and she silently thanked whatever Gods would listen for giving her Gabrielle back, whole and healthy, so the warrior wrapped her arms tightly around the smaller woman. I love you
Gabrielle, and I'll take whatever you have to offer. If it's only as your friend, so be it. The bard showed no signs of being averse to Xena's touch any longer so the warrior enfolded Gabrielle into her arms, holding the younger woman tightly against her chest. She rested her chin on the top of Gabrielle's head; rocking her and letting her purge the past dream images and feelings from her mind. The two women took pleasure in the innocent touches the other gave. Inside, each of their hearts broke from the wanting of more. It was unexplainable, though, this love they had for one another. It gave them the ability to push down their own wants and desires just to be a part of the other's life. And so the third barrier fell. * * *
The change in the young Queen was immediate. Gabrielle's smile lit up the room when she entered, her gift for open communication, a benefit at the treaty table, but Xena reaped the largest harvest. The two women smiled and laughed and talked, never tiring of teasing the other. The love they shared was utterly obvious to all those around them. Older joined Amazon
couples would shake their heads and look at one another, as if to say, "were we ever that young?" Gabrielle continued to watch Xena's morning drill and sparring sessions, even joining in for some staff practice with the young recruits. It was one such morning that Ephiny decided this had gone on long enough. She thought if she was subtle enough, she could have the two women in bed before the week was up. Xena walked over to where Ephiny lay in the grass and sprawled out next to the Regent. A line had started to form on the practice field of those warriors confident enough to test their strength and ability in a staff contest with the Queen. Gabrielle had taken to wearing her leathers while staying in the village and most of the Amazons agreed she was a sight to behold. Gabrielle began warming up, then competing in earnest with the first challenger. "She is incredible!" Ephiny remarked, truly awed by the young woman, "That she is," Xena agreed proudly. "Look at that body! You're a lucky warrior." "Eph, Gabrielle and I aren't--" Xena started to say, but was waved off by the Regent. "We're just friends." Xena finished. "Yea, right... when you're not watching, the way she looks at you? Well, let's just say she looks like she's got a lot more than friendship on her mind, that's all I can say." It seemed that everyday Ephiny found an opportunity to relate to Xena exactly how exciting this bard was and how absolutely desirable a woman she was. Ephiny could see she was getting underneath Xena's skin and the Regent was enjoying it. Xena on the other hand was becoming more uncomfortable as the week went by. Is it just my imagination or are women openly beginning to stare
at Gabrielle? Xena had been halfway successful at pushing down these desires after she and the bard had gone through the dreamscape healing. Now, she was finding it hard to stand next to Gabrielle without shivering. As far as the bard touching her, she simply turned into a six-foot puddle. Evenings seemed to be the worst. The two now shared the same bed much as they'd done everywhere they'd gone before Gabrielle's attack. The night of their dreamscape adventure Gabrielle quietly asked Xena if she would hold her through the night, the warrior was only too happy to comply. If either one of them wanted to change the sleeping arrangement after that, they didn't mention it. If Xena felt her desires ready to burst through, she would use some of her meditative techniques to hide those feelings deep inside. If this was all the warrior could have, she intended to relish in the love and friendship her bard was offering. Even though by morning's arrival Gabrielle seemed to be using most of Xena's body as a pillow. If there had ever been a time the warrior had not found this thoroughly enjoyable, she couldn't think of it now. Of course, now it was agony! It was the height of summer and the nights remained warm. Combined with the heat radiating from Xena's body, the warrior was practically suffocating. To top it off, complaining that she was too hot, two nights ago Gabrielle had gone to bed nude, only pulling up a thin sheet to cover herself. All Xena could do was to sleep on top of the covers with her shift on, praying she would die in her sleep. It would be the only way to effectively end her torture. Ephiny knew another way to end the warrior's torture and as soon as she had walked away from the practice field that day, she headed toward the council chamber to await Gabrielle's arrival. Once Gabrielle had bathed and redressed, she arrived to find Ephiny waiting to begin their day with more than an amused look on her face. Soon the Regent began to work on her Queen. While appealing to the physical side of their relationship was rather easy to drive Xena to the brink, another tactic was needed for Gabrielle. Ephiny knew that Gabrielle was young, inexperienced, and a hopeless romantic. Getting her Queen hot and bothered for the Warrior Princess was going to
be some game of words. Where as Xena would probably bolt before acting on her feelings, Ephiny had a feeling there was more to the bard than met the eye, and if pushed far enough, for long enough, she would make the move on a very bewildered warrior. "You looked pretty sharp out there today, my Queen." Ephiny flattered. "Thanks Eph... so what are we up to today?" "Nothing much," the Regent said. "Mostly getting ready for the Harvest Festival, it's at the end of the week." "Ah, yea... I'm kind of nervous. You know presiding over my first festival as 'official' Queen." Gabrielle answered nervously. "You'll do fine, besides it's the kind of party where not a lot is required of you. You do have to wear Queen's garb, though." "Can't I wear the leathers I usually do?" "Nope... it's tradition." Ephiny lied. "I'm having the seamstress work on your outfit now... she'll bring it by for you later this week." Like two heartbeats
before the party so you don't back out! Ephiny did agonize over this next part for quite a while. She really didn't see any way around it so she was just going to have to go ahead and ask Gabrielle to forgive her for lying later. Ephiny tried to put a preoccupied, worried look on her face. "Eph, is something bothering you?" Gabrielle asked. "Actually, yea. I've got a problem and it's kind of embarrassing. You're the only person I can think of to talk to who wouldn't laugh at me." "Eph, you've suffered through all my problems with me... what are friends for? So what's this thing you can't tell anyone else," Gabrielle asked understandingly.
"I'm in love... with a warrior. Except I don't know if she feels the same." "Why don't you just ask her? You've never seemed to be shy in that regard. Is it someone I know?" Gabrielle questioned.
Well, that's the pot calling the kettle black! "I don't want to say who it is yet... till I know for sure how she feels. It could jinx it or something and I don't want to look like an idiot. It's just that she's really special to me, Gabrielle, and I'd kind of like to know she feels at least something for me before I make a fool out of myself. You're the bard... what can you come up that's subtle and won't give me away to soon." Ephiny swore to Artemis she would go to the temple and make two offerings a day if she would forgive her for such shameful lies to her Chosen. Ephiny knew that being the bard and the romantic she was, Gabrielle could think up a barrel full of little ways to encourage a reluctant warrior's heart. Gabrielle sat pursing her lips, deep in thought. Suddenly she brightened. "Okay, Eph... this one's sure-fire. When you're talking, at some point place your hand on top of her thigh. Low enough so she won't suspect anything, but high enough so that it definitely gets her thinking. If she thinks of you only as a friend she won't blink an eye, just a friendly gesture, you know? If she interested in you it should be enough to definitely get her juices going." Gabrielle finished, with a satisfied smile. "I never knew you were so devious, My Queen," the Regent smiled devilishly. Xena why do I suddenly feel sorry for you? * * *
Of course the more Gabrielle thought of the advice she had given her friend, the more she wondered if it would actually work. What she read in
scrolls was so different from real life sometimes. Of course, when Gabrielle thought about trying her own advice out on somebody the only person around was a certain Warrior Princess. This could still work. At least I'll get to see the negative reaction and Ephiny can tell me how it worked on someone interested in her. Xena was at the table in their hut, scrolls containing maps spread out in front of her. She was taking note of some new acquisitions the Amazons had made recently. Gabrielle pulled up a seat next to her and began asking the warrior questions about Greece's city-states. Xena loved to teach and seemed thrilled the bard was finally taking an interest in the country around her. Gabrielle launched into a story about their last trip to Athens and Xena suddenly felt the bard's hand on her thigh. The warrior nearly leapt straight up into the air, knocking her chair over, as her body became airborne. Gabrielle just sat there with her mouth open. "Your... your h-hand," Xena stammered. Sweet Mother of Zeus! Think of something, warrior and do it quick! "It was ice cold," Xena said with a lopsided grin. Gabrielle crossed to where Xena stood, shivering slightly and gently rubbed the warriors upper arms, which caused Xena to shiver all the more. "Are you sure you're not coming down with something? You feel awfully warm." Gabrielle asked with concern. Six-foot puddle time, Xena thought to herself. "I'm okay, really. Um, Gabrielle... I forgot... I better go check on Argo, she wasn't exactly herself today. I'll be back in a bit." "Do you want me to go with you?" Gabrielle asked, moving toward the warrior. "No!" Xena said a little more forcefully than she intended. "I mean, there's no sense in both of us smelling like the stable is there?" she smiled at the bard before practically running through the door.
All Gabrielle could do was stare at Xena's hastily retreating figure, wondering what had just happened. * * *
Of course, the Regent knew Gabrielle would try out her theory on Xena. Being a bard, Gabrielle couldn't help but totally immerse herself in the action of her stories. The Regent also knew what would happen once the Queen tried out her little ploy on the warrior... she wasn't disappointed. The next day Gabrielle could barely manage to get village business out of the way before she and Ephiny started talking. "It worked," was all the Regent would say. "How do you know?" Gabrielle tried not to appear too inquisitive. "I put my hand on her thigh, you know... talking, totally casual. I swear, the woman almost leapt into the lake! Her whole body felt like it was on fire." The whole time Ephiny was talking, Gabrielle's eyes were getting wider and wider. And so the week started. Everyday Gabrielle would give advice to Ephiny and every night she would drive her warrior into near fits. Ephiny nearly lost her composure completely when she saw Xena, grumpily headed to the practice field before dawn one morning, heavy black circles under the warrior's eyes. The night before had been when Gabrielle had suggested gauging her potential partner's reaction to Ephiny's nude body in the baths. Since nothing Gabrielle said could entice Xena into the baths with her, she thought up the sleeping nude bit. Gabrielle smiled to herself that night as she rolled away from Xena to sleep. She was beginning to find it a little more than exciting driving Xena to distraction. A game no longer, the bard became more certain with each
day that her warrior indeed had feelings for her. She just couldn't figure out why Xena wouldn't say anything. The bard had pulled the sheet over her shoulder, feigning sleep, successfully exposing her backside to Xena's eyes. She smiled slightly upon hearing the warrior's groan. * * *
"Oh, I forgot to tell you, your new outfit is at Artemis' temple. I figured since that's where the ceremony starts you may as well get dressed there." Ephiny couldn't wait to see the Warrior Princess' face when Gabrielle made her walk from the temple to the village entrance. "I'm going for it tonight, Gabrielle." Ephiny stated emphatically. "You sure it's not too soon," Gabrielle asked nervously. "Gabrielle, I think if I wait any longer it just may kill her!" Ephiny grinned over at her friend. The days work had been completed and they sat in the council chambers sharing a cup of wine. Tonight was the Festival and with Amazon wine being what it was and Gabrielle's costume looking like it did, Ephiny figured if the warrior and her bard didn't connect tonight, they never would. "Ephiny..." Gabrielle over at the Regent seriously. "What if she tells you that she doesn't feel the same way?" Ephiny smiled at her young friend who was preparing to answer her heart's call. "Gabrielle, I'd bet my life she won't say that, but there is always that chance." "Could you still be friends? I mean, if she rejected you." The Queen asked with trepidation. "I guess it depends on how strong our friendship is in the first place." The
Regent answered. "And if she tries to hide her true feelings from you?" "Gabrielle, did you know that to become a great leader you have to be able to read between the scroll lines?" The Regent said. "Like being able to tell if someone is lying," Gabrielle added. "In a way... but then again it's more than that. You happen to be a great negotiator, have I ever told you that? Remember those treaties you hammered out with Therasia last season? I mean, you've got a few things going for you right off. Your youth and size tend to lull others into a false sense of security. They don't think a girl as sweet and charming as you would ever try to pull one over on them. Mostly, though... it's because you seem to know when you have them over a barrel and when you don't. It's always seemed as if you knew exactly how to get just one more concession out of them without driving them from the bargaining table." Ephiny paused to sip from her cup of wine. "Gabrielle, you have the gift of being able to read people in situations like those. When it comes to people you don't know, you seem to have an innate ability for knowing when they're trying to hide something from you. And that gift, just might turn you into the Queen that you are by right of caste," Ephiny finished, swallowing the remaining wine in one gulp. "Might--make me a Queen?" Gabrielle asked quietly. "My dear sister," Ephiny smiled as she used the Amazon term of endearment, "When you are able to read your friends thoughts as easily as your enemies... then you will become a Queen." "I guess the naïve farm girl in me doesn't think my friends would lie to me," Gabrielle responded with a half-hearted grin. "Not all lies are bad," Ephiny smiled at the young woman who had come to mean so much to her. "Remember when Eponin traded for those atrocious
red boots... then she asked you what you thought of them?" Gabrielle tried to stifle a laugh without success. "Well... she really seemed like she liked them... and. Well... I, uhm... I didn't want to hurt her feelings--" "So you lied to her." "Okay, okay... I get your point. There are times when friends don't tell you the whole truth to spare your feelings." "There are all kinds of reasons for it, Gabrielle. We want to spare the people we care about from hurt and pain, or we have some idea about misplaced honor, or we simply do it out of love." Ephiny watched Gabrielle's face and wondered if the young Queen grasped the notion of what she was really trying to say. The Regent was trying hard not to be obvious, better to have the young woman realize the truth in the words for herself. If she could just get Gabrielle to not only hear Xena speak, but to listen to what the warrior was telling her. " Mostly we do it out of love, but for whatever reason we do it, we tend to take away their freedom of choice. We don't give them all the information and trust them to make their own decisions. That's the unfair part. Gabrielle, sometimes what people are not saying to you is every bit as important as what they are."
Well, I've gone as far as I dare. You're a smart girl, Gabrielle, you figure out the rest. The Queen Regent stood and squeezed her friend's shoulder before she walked from the hut, leaving Gabrielle to ponder the immensity, and the double meaning, of the Regent's words. * * *
Xena soaked for a good long time in a steaming bath. Of course, the same warm water that soothed her aching muscles was the same warm wetness that started her thinking of Gabrielle. Then again, just about everything made her think of Gabrielle that way lately. If she didn't know Gabrielle so well she would have sworn the bard was playing games with her. Gabrielle went to the temple earlier for the ritual part of the festival. The young Queen would have to make a sacrifice of thanks to Artemis, and then also to Persephone and Demeter in thanks for a good Harvest. Ceremonial bathing, dressing. Gods... why did I have to think about those! Xena left the baths and returned to their hut. She cleaned and polished her leathers, adjusting the unfamiliar cloak on her shoulder armor. More like a cape, it was the same blue as Xena's eyes with white trim. Its color indicated Xena's status as the Queen's Champion.
Damn hot out for leathers and a cloak! She dressed in her full attire for Gabrielle. This was her bard's first official ceremony as Queen and the young woman was taking it quite seriously. * * *
"Ephiny, are you insane! I can't wear this... I mean, look at it!" Gabrielle was beside herself, pacing the length of the room wrapped in a towel. "Gabrielle, it's a tradition. Besides, we're all women here," Ephiny said with a smile. "AMAZON WOMEN!" the Queen shouted. "What will Xena think when she sees me?" Gabrielle looked horrified.
I can tell you exactly what she'll think. Ephiny could barely restrain herself from uttering this last thought aloud.
Suddenly Gabrielle had the exact same thought as her Regent. * * *
Xena was on her third cup of ale when the drums sounded the approach of the Queen, her Regent, and the Royal Guard as they made their way from the Temple of Artemis to the center of the village. Gabrielle would carry in a flame, a gift from Artemis, light the bonfire, and make the first toast. That's when the ale would go by the wayside in exchange for the legendary Amazon wine. Even Xena could never resist the brew. Seeing as it would be a quarter of a candlemark before the Queen's group arrived, Eponin and Xena decided to enjoy another ale. Figuring they still had time for one more quick drink, the two warriors grabbed a full pitcher and Xena prepared to fill their mugs. "Say when," Xena began to pour as the drums drew close. Xena had her back to the approaching ensemble, but the look on Eponin's face caused her to turn to watch the procession. The warrior opened her mouth as if to speak, but no sound came out. "When... Xena, when, when!" Eponin was shouting, pulling her hand away from the overflowing mug. Xena caught herself, but not before she had dumped half the contents of the pitcher onto the table. Xena simply couldn't believe it. She was awe struck not only by Gabrielle's obvious lack of modesty, but mostly from the Queen's beauty. Gabrielle led the procession with Ephiny a step or two behind her. Six members of the Royal Guard surrounded the two women, the musicians trailing along. All of the women wore their traditional ceremonial masks, but Xena would know Gabrielle's body anywhere, especially since she's been taking long looks at it the last couple of nights. The young Queen had her
hair braided back from her face and her Amazon finest adorned her neck and wrists, but it was the outfit, or rather lack of, that had hearts stopping within the village. Gabrielle's skirt consisted of nothing more than long, sweeping loincloths, held together with leather ties, fastened at each hip. The front and back loincloths reached the ground and were beautiful fawn leather. The undergarment was nothing more than thong, tied at each hip with the loincloth, giving the distinct appearance that the young woman was wearing nothing underneath. Gabrielle's top was little more than a wide strip of the same colored leather as the loincloth. It barely covered her breasts, tying in the back and leaving little to the imagination. Oh, but Xena's imagination was working! She quickly felt herself working toward that puddle state again. Then of course she began to look at the other women looking at HER bard. "Quit looking at her that way!" she hissed at Eponin. "But... just look at her." The Amazon warrior stammered. Xena realized she was on, but glared at Eponin as she made her way to where the procession had stopped in front of the bonfire. The warrior grabbed a bow and notched an arrow. Leaning toward Gabrielle she saw the bard's sparkling emerald eyes behind her Queen's mask. Gabrielle lit the arrow and Xena let it sail into the wood stacked high before them. The warrior was barely conscious of the toast the Queen made or of holding out an arm to lead Gabrielle to the dais where she would have to sit at her throne, accepting greetings for at least a little while before mingling with the rest of the Amazons. Xena became acutely aware of her surroundings, however once Gabrielle placed her hand on Xena's arm. Unlike the last time the warrior had led her into the food hut this way, Gabrielle placed her hand, not on Xena's bracer, but around the warm skin of her upper arm. Yep, six-foot puddle time. Gabrielle removed her mask once she was seated and profoundly enjoyed the effect she was having on her warrior. Although there was hardly a woman in the village that had not been similarly affected by the young
Queen, Gabrielle took no notice of them. The young Queen sat, regal and beautiful, sipping a cup of wine. Xena stood slightly behind and to the left of the Queen's throne as the Queen's Champion. It wasn't a formal occasion and Xena didn't exactly have to be in this traditional position, but by the looks Gabrielle was receiving from some of the warriors, Xena wouldn't have set foot off that dais if her life depended upon it. She stood straight and unmoving, her arms folded across her chest. More than a few women would have dearly loved the company of their Queen for the evening, but few were willing to defy the Warrior Princess to get it. One brave warrior got the closest, but even she yielded, looking behind the beautiful young Queen, at Xena, shooting a withering 'back off' glance in her direction. The end of the evening couldn't come too soon for Xena, but it eventually did. The warrior couldn't have been prouder or more in love with Gabrielle as she had been this evening, but damn, if the bard wasn't turning her inside out, lately. If Xena thought her troubles were over for the night, she was mistaken. If Gabrielle had anything to do with it, the warrior's problems were just beginning. * * *
"Let me help you with that," Gabrielle pushed Xena's hands aside and began to remove the warrior's armor. The bard's fingers could have made quick work of the familiar task, but she chose to linger, occasionally resting her fingers on Xena's leathers. Gabrielle kept her touch innocent, but she could see a flush creeping up the tanned body of the warrior. When the bard reached up, she leaned into Xena to remove her upper arm protectors. Gabrielle thought she detected a faint gasp from the warrior as their breasts pressed into each other.
The truth of the matter was that Xena was having a hard time just remembering to breathe. By the time Gabrielle was finished with her gentle seduction of the warrior's senses, Xena knew if she didn't put some distance between her and the bard, she would ravish the young woman on the spot. Gabrielle began to sense Xena spiraling toward the brink and as quickly as she had started, the young Queen turned away and began stripping off her own clothes, little as they were. By the time Xena's brain registered the fact that Gabrielle had moved away from her, the bard had removed the loincloth and turned her back toward Xena. "Xena, can you untie this for me, I can't reach the knot," the bard motioned toward the cloth that was wrapped around her top. Xena, however, had been caught up in the exquisite view she was being rewarded with. Gabrielle's undergarment had indeed been a thong. With only a small piece of leather covering the golden patch of hair between her legs, the thong completely exposing the bard's shapely backside. The warrior came to her senses, or as close as she could under the circumstances, and raised trembling hands to untie the knot. Gabrielle had lifted her arms, holding her hair up out of the way. The sleek, firm muscles of the bard's back rippled as she raised her arms causing the taller woman to breath especially hard. Gabrielle felt Xena's warm breath on her neck and it caused her to shiver, the sensation sending a definite jolt to her center. Gods, if the woman
wants me, why doesn't she just take me! Xena's somewhat shaky fingers worked slowly; desperately afraid the cloth would simply fall, exposing the treasures hidden beneath, while at the same time desperately afraid it wouldn't. It did. Gabrielle bent over to pick up the fallen leather, completely aware of the
fact that Xena still stood inches behind her. Xena's eyes nearly popped out of her skull, she backed up so fast she ran into the table. Gabrielle turned to see what had happened, the picture of innocence... naked innocence, Xena thought. The warrior had continued to move backward until she fell over the nearest chair. "Xena, are you allright?" Gabrielle asked with concern. "I think I need some air..." and with that Xena bolted from the hut. Gabrielle smiled at the closed door, knowing Xena would be back. The bard's actions this evening had guaranteed that, like a moth to a flame, the warrior would come back to their hut tonight. Gabrielle hoped she would be ready. * * *
Xena ran to the other end of the village, picking up speed when she hit the woods. She pulled up when her lungs began to burn and leaned heavily into the nearest tree, her forehead resting on a forearm glistening with sweat. Listening for sentries, she slipped her hand inside her now soaked breeches, through the dampened curls, and began to stroke herself. She had barely begun to touch herself before her orgasm took her, standing there against the tree.
Sweet ever-loving Gods! Scarcely heartbeats had gone by before she began moving her hand again. She thrust her hand against herself, her hips rocking against air, until another climax rolled through her body. The physical release was definitely that, but it did little to satiate her. As her breathing calmed she
knew the truth of the matter. Pleasuring herself would give her temporary release, but it would do little to quench her thirst, only one thing could do that. The warrior's need was Gabrielle... her total release would be Gabrielle, the only thing that could assuage her passions was the one thing she would never allow herself to have. * * *
Xena silently moved closer to the Queen's hut and saw Gabrielle still awake. The young woman was seated at the table, sipping pensively on a cup of wine, a far away look in her eyes. The warrior continued on toward the baths, perhaps if she had a good long bath, Gabrielle would be sound asleep by the time she got back. * * *
Xena sat on the edge of the bed that she and Gabrielle shared. The bard lay on her back sleeping silently as the warrior brushed away a stray lock of honey colored hair from the young woman's face. The warrior sat with one foot on the floor and her other tucked underneath her, a linen shift had replaced her leathers, her hair still damp from her recent bath. The room became filled with the clean damp scent of the warrior; jasmine, leather, and Gabrielle's favorite... cinnamon. The bard could never figure that one out until Xena confided that it was in the thick, soapy liquid the warrior used to wash her hair. Xena also told Gabrielle the only reason the bard liked it so much was because it reminded her of food. Xena smiled slightly at the memory.
Oh, Gabrielle, I love you so much. I know you can never return it the way I dream of, but I also know you love me, my bard, even if it's only in friendship. After all you went through, having my touch cause you so much pain, you still wanted me near, still wanted my friendship. Xena shook her head more in awe than sadness.
I'll never completely understand the light in you, but I thank any Gods who listen for the chance at being a part of your life's journey, for the love you are able to show me. I can't live without you, Gabrielle. No matter what it takes, my bard, I will never give into my desires... I'll never ruin what we have with my body's selfish lusts. Tears brimmed in the warrior's eyes and she quickly pushed them back. She didn't want sadness over her decision. She wanted to be happy and revel in the love and affection her bard was able to give. She vowed to give up some of her gruff warrior ways to see to it that Gabrielle's happiness always came first. What the warrior didn't realize was that, in her heart, she had already been doing just that. The warrior immediately lifted her head, the hairs on the back of her neck standing up. She tilted her head slightly, attempting to listen for any tell tale sounds from the intruder. Ares? He had been suspiciously absent as of late. No, Xena knew too well the prickling sensation than ran through her when the God of War was near. Definitely a God, but who? Does it
matter? "Thank You," the warrior whispered faintly. Xena, Warrior Princes, the woman who, at best, felt contempt for the petty Gods of Greece, knowing that they rarely did anything in the mortal realm that wasn't for their own personal amusement or satisfaction, was keeping her promise. She knew she would drop to her knees and prostrate herself before any God just to keep the woman beside her in her life. She would do anything. * * *
Two shimmering spectral images stood side by side in the shadows of the Amazon Queen's hut. Artemis rolled her eyes when she looked over at her sister. The goddess Aphrodite had tears streaming from her eyes and a saccharine smile plastered to her face. Artemis turned to gaze at the warrior, who in turn gazed lovingly at the goddess' chosen, lying asleep on the bed. The patron goddess of the Amazon's felt tears in her eyes as well, watching two women so much in love, so willing to give up everything for the other. Her tears fell in earnest when she heard the warrior's whisper of thanks. Aphrodite raised a hand and Artemis felt the energy increase around them. "You mustn't interfere," she whispered. "I'm not interfering... just waking up the Gabster. That girl of yours could sleep through the forces of Tartaurus storming Mt. Olympus!" The goddess of love exclaimed. The two Gods disappeared without a sound. * * *
Gabrielle felt as though she was being pulled from a dream that she couldn't seem to remember. She hadn't wanted to fall asleep, but a couple cups of wine had made for a hard time keeping vigil for her warrior. She quickly opened her eyes and was startled to see a figure sitting next to her. Realizing it was Xena, she became more concerned than frightened. "Xena, are you allright?" Xena was taken off guard with the speed with which Gabrielle awoke. One moment she was listening to the sounds of her bard dreaming, the next
heartbeat Gabrielle was sitting up facing her. Only one drawback to this situation. When Gabrielle sat up, the sheet fell away from her nude body, exposing the Warrior Princess to what she had been fighting against all evening. Xena's blue eyes widen instinctively at the sight. "Xena... are you okay? Are you ill?" Gabrielle questioned, worry in her voice. The Queen thought she saw a flush rise to Xena's cheeks, the moonlight bathing the hut in it's light. As soon as Gabrielle felt the cool night air on her body she realized what had caused the reaction in her beautiful warrior. Gabrielle felt small flames of desire slowly begin to burn their way through her body. She knew she couldn't wait any longer. If Xena truly wanted her and was simply fighting against the feeling to protect the bard, Gabrielle had no intention of letting it go on a minute longer. She had visited her warrior's dreamscape. She knew what Xena wanted, even if the warrior wouldn't admit it, even to herself. Tenderly Gabrielle reached out a hand and touched Xena's cheek with soft fingers, pushing to one side the damp locks of ebony hair that clung to the warrior's face. "I didn't mean to scare you..." the warrior drifted off. "It's allright. I'm just a little worried. Are you sure you feel okay?" Gabrielle never stopped stroking the warrior's face. Tender but innocent touches that couldn't be misconstrued as anything else. "Sure, I feel fine," Xena said with a catch in her voice. She tried to make the crack in her voice sound like she had meant to clear her throat. Gabrielle's touch was so soft, so refreshingly innocent, but the warrior was becoming unnerved and the resolve she had sworn to moments ago began to fade. "Gabrielle, you should stop..." the warrior whispered huskily. Gabrielle began to speak and all Xena could do was watch the young
woman's sensuous lips move, the warrior's hands rigidly clenched at her sides. She could hear the words the bard spoke, but all Xena could really concentrate on was the feeling of Gabrielle's fingers on her skin. It was pleasure combined with pain, the bard's touch. Xena's skin tingled in delight and yet burned like fire wherever Gabrielle caressed her. "I'm not sure why you want me to stop... are you protecting me again?" Xena could not answer the bard to save her own life and Gabrielle never stopped her assault on the warrior's heated skin. The bard felt her own body betray her as a warm trickle of wetness made it's way between her legs. She kept her touches innocuous and feather-light, knowing the sensation was causing explosions of desire within the warrior. Gabrielle's hand floated delicately across the warrior's jaw and across her chin, fingers rising up to brush lightly across Xena lips. She ran her hand through the still damp raven locks and brought her index finger down along the length of the warrior's ear and across her earlobe. "Ephiny and I had a very interesting talk this afternoon, shall I tell you about it?" Gabrielle continued. Xena parted her lips to speak and realized her voice would only betray her. Caught in the spell of Gabrielle's voice and her exquisite touch, the warrior could only nod her head in assent. "We talked about why the people who care about us keep secrets from us; why they hide their true feelings and emotions. Ephiny said it was either from their trying to protect us, misplaced honor... or love." Gabrielle's hand had continued its journey. She rested it momentarily on Xena's jaw, cupping the flesh lovingly. Once more those fingers moved across the warrior's jaw line, to her chin and started their descent down her neck, resting inside the cleavage where the cloth of the warrior's shift began. Xena's whole body began to tremble slightly, warring against her body's passions. Gabrielle slid her whole hand up and ran her index finger back
and forth across the taller woman's collarbone. Moving toward the warrior's shoulder, she deftly slid the strap of Xena's shift off her shoulder, the material falling away from the warrior's body, exposing most of her breast. Xena was breathing hard by now, the coolness of the night air having little to do with the uncovered nipple that stood at attention begging for the bard's fiery touch. Her hands clenched and unclenched into the sheet as she begged her body to fight the effects of Gabrielle's caress. "I guess I want to know what your reason is, Xena," Gabrielle whispered the warrior's name. "What do you hide from me... and why?" Gabrielle finished by lightly touching the uppermost swell of Xena's exposed breast, but nothing more than would have been available had the shift not fallen. Xena dropped her head, no longer able to watch Gabrielle's lips as she spoke, or look into the sparkling green eyes that held sparks of something Xena had never seen there before. "Gods, Gabrielle... you don't even know what you're doing to me." Xena muttered in what sounded like utter defeat. Gabrielle saw her chance as she steeled her nerves for what she would do next. The bard moved her hand under Xena's chin and tilted it upward; the bard's eyes locking on the blue of Xena's. Gabrielle had intended to kiss the warrior, but again her own body betrayed her by demanding more. The young woman moved her body closer to Xena's and straddled the warrior's thigh, the one that had a leg tucked underneath. Gabrielle's arms encircled the warrior's neck and she pulled herself toward the other woman, her desire coating Xena's thigh as she slid closer to the warrior. She moved her lips to Xena's ear and whispered. "Oh, but I do know what I'm doing to you, my love... I do," she said as her tongue ran the length of Xena's ear, taking the earlobe in her mouth and sucking gently. "Good Gods!" Xena moaned, pulling Gabrielle away, holding her at arms length. Xena was close to drowning in the depths of green in front of her.
This woman, her bestfriend, the woman she would give her life for, do anything for. Xena saw something new in those eyes. She saw want... need... and, finally ... love. "Gabrielle, is this... is this what you really want... am I what you really want?" Xena whispered falteringly, almost afraid to hear her bard's answer. Gabrielle said the only words she knew would spur the warrior on... the words the dreamscape Gabrielle used night after night in the warrior's dreams. "Please, Xena... don't stop." Gabrielle was right about how it would affect the warrior. Xena wrapped strong arms around the bard's waist and pulled the young woman to her, their bodies pressing tightly together. With one kiss, the warrior imparted the depth of her love to the young Queen. Their lips pressed together, soft flesh meeting soft flesh, until passion swept both women along on an immense wave. Xena's tongue slipped past lips parted quickly for her, feeling Gabrielle's intense heat rising as quickly as the warrior's own did. Xena lost herself in the bard's kiss just as she had all those times in her dreamscape Gabrielle had her fingers buried in Xena's dark locks, pulling the woman to her with strength and a passion she hadn't even known she possessed. Her hips began a slow rocking motion against the warrior's thigh, moaning against Xena's mouth at the pleasing friction against her center. Xena's hands traveled down the bard's back and she urged Gabrielle on, grasping the young woman's hips, encouraging the motion. Gabrielle pulled away from the kiss first, leaning her forehead on the warrior's chin, both of them gasping for breath. The bard's heart began pounding, and Gabrielle swore it was going to pound clear out of her chest. She had never experienced anything this intense... this raw before. All she
could focus on were the incredible sensations Xena's body was eliciting from her own. That and the overwhelming desire to take Xena as the dreamscape Gabrielle had done. "You have entirely too many clothes on," Gabrielle said in a commanding tone. Xena looked slightly shocked at the inflection in the bard's voice, pulling back to gaze into her eyes. Xena recognized the need there, just as her own eyes must have reflected that same passionate glaze. Xena saw something else there too. Now she knew for certain Gabrielle had hidden in the shadows, watching the warrior's dreamscape unfold. Xena's greatest fantasy, her most heavily concealed desire, and now the bard knew it too. Gabrielle had the same feral look in her smoldering gaze that the dreamscape Gabrielle had. Xena wasn't sure if she could handle this in reality. "Off." Gabrielle ordered, indicating the warrior's shift. Xena could feel her body immediately respond to the command as a raging river began to flow from her aroused sex. Her body hummed like an over-taut bowstring as she lifted the shift over her head in one swift movement, exposing herself completely to the bard's hungry eyes. Whether the warrior was willing to admit it or not, Gabrielle's domination over her excited her beyond words. Gabrielle pushed Xena back onto the bed; the warrior straightening out her leg which was now quite numb. Both women groaned at the feel of Gabrielle's weight on top of Xena's body. The bard's hand desperately exploring every inch of skin within her grasp, settling on Xena's breast, kneading the full flesh. Her fingers pulled on the warrior's nipple, eliciting a mild groan from Xena. Gabrielle soon found the harder she pulled the erect flesh, the louder the warrior's moans became. Moving her lips to capture Xena's own, the bard thrust her tongue past the warrior's lips, moving the invading muscle in rhythm to the pulls of the warrior's tender nipples.
Xena had to pull her mouth away from the bard, but Gabrielle never stopped her assault on the warrior's breast. The bard's devouring eyes watched as Xena ran her tongue over her lips and then parted them, pulling much needed air into her lungs, panting. Gabrielle moved to the warrior's neck, sucking and nipping at the soft flesh there. The bard bit the supple flesh of Xena's throat and began to suck harder. Xena's hands entwined in the bard's hair, pulling her closer. "Yesss, Gabrielle... harder..." Xena groaned. The warrior's request seemed to drive Gabrielle into a passionate frenzy. She lost awareness of the outside world. At that moment in time, there was only Xena, physical pleasure, and the bard's need to totally consume the dark warrior. Gabrielle's thigh moved in between Xena's legs and pressed against her soaking mound. "Oh, Gods..." Gabrielle moaned into the warrior's shoulder, feeling Xena's wetness against her. The bard's lips moved down the warrior's neck and across her shoulder each bite and caress of her tongue drawing gasps of pleasure from the writhing figure under her. "Please..." Xena moaned as she arched her back, silently begging Gabrielle to her breast. The bard's mouth moved closer to its prize, suddenly enclosing Xena's aching nipple in it's wet warmth. Gabrielle's tongue teased the hard flesh, flicking across it lightly, then sucking and grazing it through her teeth. Xena felt the wet pulling of her nipple straight through to her center, her hips beginning to thrust against the bard's thigh. The warrior quickly realized that each time she voiced her pleasure with a moan, she was rewarded with a harder sucking motion to her already swollen nipple. The sounds coming from the warrior soon became constant.
Once again Gabrielle captured the warrior's lips in a kiss filled with seductive fire. Moving her lips to Xena's ear she whispered, "Tell me what you want, Xena... I know, I saw into your dreams... now, I want you to tell me." Gabrielle whispered enticingly. Xena could barely breathe let alone speak. She should have known Gabrielle would be such a lover, yet as passionate as the young woman lived life, it was only a fraction of the passion she put into her lovemaking. The warrior immediately panicked when she heard the bard whisper in her ear. God's this is Gabrielle! I know what I want her to do, but can I say it...
to her? Gabrielle could feel the subtle change in the warrior's body as she warred within herself. The young Queen knew this would be hard for Xena. Can
she do it? Can she let go enough to surrender it all? Gabrielle continued to lick and kiss Xena's ear, while slowly moving her hand down across the warrior's stomach, along the top of a muscled thigh, bringing her fingers back up along the inside of the same leg. She let her hand rest lightly against the damp curls, feeling the heat radiating from Xena's center. The warrior raised her hips toward the bard's hand and Gabrielle slid her fingers across the slick folds, teasing, yet avoiding the hidden nub of flesh. Xena groaned long and loud in frustration when the bard abruptly pulled her hand away, leaning in again to whisper in the warrior's ear. "You know what I want... and you know that you want it too. Tell me, Xena... I want to hear you say it." Xena growled in frustration over her inability to put a voice to her passion when it was obvious it meant so much to her bard. Gabrielle sensed the warrior's growing disappointment in herself, and quickly worked around the warrior's inhibition.
"Then show me..." the bard whispered enticingly. Xena pulled Gabrielle to where she could look into the young woman's eyes, and captured her lips in a scorching kiss that very nearly stole the bard's resolve to have her way with the warrior. Gabrielle had never realized so much love and affection could be conveyed in one kiss. "Show me, my love..." Gabrielle said breathlessly, pressing her hand against Xena's mound. The warrior slid her hand down her own body, placing it over Gabrielle's smaller one. Wrapping her fingers within the bard's, she slid their hands into her wetness, positioning the bard's toward her opening. She moved Gabrielle's thumb across the swollen nub of flesh, crying out at the pleasure of the strokes. Xena raised her hips slightly, and Gabrielle felt herself being drawn inside the warrior. Xena looked at the bard, expecting to see shock or disgust in her eyes. Instead, the young woman's eyes burned with unreleased need and an, as yet, unfulfilled desire. Xena's breath caught in her throat when in one fluid motion, Gabrielle pushed three fingers deep into Xena's opening. Xena splayed her knees and with one foot still firmly planted on the floor she pushed herself up to meet the thrusts of Gabrielle's hand. "Like that?" Gabrielle whispered, with a knowing smile. "Yes... like that... right there... Oh, Gods, Gabrielle" Xena then lost her voice, and she gave up on speech, languid moans of sheer pleasure the only sounds she seemed capable of making. Gabrielle continued pushing hard into Xena, she felt time lose all meaning as her whole world became the sounds of Xena's passion and the warrior's velvet warmth surrounding her stroking fingers. Gabrielle followed the rhythm Xena's hips set, not even trying to suppress a groan when the warrior lifted her thigh up, and pressed it firmly against the bard's center. Gabrielle propelled her hips toward the warrior's leg, her own wetness
flowing down the sides of the warrior's thigh. Momentarily caught up in her own rapture, the bard opened her eyes to gaze down on her lover. Xena's hips continued to thrust harder and harder against Gabrielle's hand, the warrior's whole body beginning to tremble uncontrollably. Her eyes rolled back in her head just before her eyelids snapped shut. "Xena, Look at me." Gabrielle managed to gasp, her own body begging for release. Xena opened her eyes and lifted her head up slightly, cradling Gabrielle's face in her hands. The warrior could feel the tremors run through her body, she was teetering on the brink, but she found it impossible to convey to Gabrielle her terror at the complete control the bard demanded from her. Gabrielle, however, knew this warrior all too well. In the fraction of a heartbeat it took for the bard to feel Xena's fear, to search the blue depths turned dark with desire, the bard knew what she had to do. Gabrielle slowed the movement of her hand inside the warrior to deep, even strokes, never taking her eyes from her lover's. The bard too was breathing hard, but concentrated on the words Xena needed to hear. "I don't want you to surrender to me... I want you to surrender for me. Not to my will, my love... surrender to my love." The bard said in a voice hoarse with her own desire. "I love you, Xena..." The effect was immediate as Xena pulled the bard's lips to hers in a kiss filled with all of the warrior's feelings of freedom at surrendering to Gabrielle's love. The fire in the warrior's belly soon transferred itself into the bard's through that kiss. A growl of pure pleasure began to rumble from the warrior, deep in her chest. She could feel herself about to leap from the precipice, liquid fire rushing from her sex, washing over the bard's thrusting hand. "Gab... rielle..." Xena panted, a small groan the only sound the warrior made conveying her impending release to the bard.
Gabrielle wanted much more. The bard had begun to feel her own body being consumed by the intense heat of Xena's approaching orgasm, she felt as if she were literally on fire, flames spreading across her flesh slick with sweat. Thrusting her own hips hard against Xena's thigh, the bard cried out, "Sweet mother of Zeus, woman... let me hear you!" Xena's head slammed down into the bed at the sound of Gabrielle's command. The warrior's body convulsed and shook as wave after wave of intense pleasure swept through her. The growl that had started as a low rumble emerged from Xena's throat as an ear shattering sound that became part battle cry, and partly an incoherent scream of her lover's name. The sound was enough for Gabrielle. At her lover's cry, she joined the warrior in release, feeling her body being engulfed in flames, and then the bard began to melt. Before Xena's last orgasm had coursed through her body, another began as she felt Gabrielle's shuddering liberation from the exquisite torture. Xena smiled as Gabrielle's unintelligible cry echoed the warrior's in stamina. Neither woman made any attempt to move as the bard lay atop Xena, the warrior's arms enfolding the spent woman. They both tried in vain to bring their breathing under control, too unsure of their voices to speak. * * *
It is at this point when Eponin again joins our story. Actually we catch up with the Amazon warrior after she has only been asleep in her hut for a few candlemarks, enjoying a considerable amount of wine during the evenings festivities.
Her new recruit Tarazon had come to wake the older warrior for her shift at watch. Part of what was to follow, Eponin blamed solely on Tarazon. The older warrior swore that the recruit should have noticed that a warrior with a hangover is not the best person to have on watch and the young recruit should have volunteered to take the shift. Since no such offer was forthcoming, Eponin sucked it up and made her way to relieve the first shift. Eponin's night was about to change, but she had no way of knowing at this point how much. Things were indeed looking up for the warrior when Solari happened along and took pity on her friend. Solari could see the shape Eponin was in so she graciously offered to switch places with the warrior. Solari would take watch in the trees at the outskirts of the village for her friend, while Eponin would join the two members of the Royal Guard at the rather easy task of keeping watch on the Queen's hut. Eponin thanked her friend, leaving her a promise of owing her one, and thought to herself... how hard could it be? This was definitely going to be easy work, and Eponin was already planning on how to catch a quick nap, leaving the young but capable Royal Guards in charge. She caught up with the pair lounging a little farther from the Queen's hut than usual and wondered what on earth the younger women had been talking about, seeing as they were both blushing furiously. That's when she heard it. It was a blood-curdling yell that made the hairs on the back of her neck and arms stand up. On the battlefield it would not have phased her, but this came from the Queen's hut. Eponin may have been a little dense at times, but she was a warrior through and through, and a good one at that. Without thinking of her own safety, she rushed toward the door to the Queen's hut. The two members of the Royal Guard were as shocked by the screams coming from their Queen's hut as the older warrior had been, they had an advantage however. Instead of charging behind Eponin, they just turned redder. They thought about letting the warrior in on the whole story, but members of the Royal Guard tend to be a rather aloof bunch, and these
two immediately saw the makings of a great way to take a warrior down a peg. Eponin stormed the hut, taking all six steps in two leaps. She pulled her sword as she kicked open the door, ready for anything. Except for that. It had only been heartbeats for the two lovers, Gabrielle still lying in the embrace of one completely satisfied warrior, both women still breathing heavily, when the door to their hut was kicked in. Xena cursed herself for her mental lapse; her weapons still on the table. The warrior rolled over pulling Gabrielle under her to shield the young woman from their attacker. It was then that everything and everyone seemed to begin moving in slow motion. The two women inside the hut realized the intruder was Eponin a full two or three heartbeats before the warrior could take in what was happening. "Eponin!" Gabrielle shouted indignantly, pulling the sheet up in a feeble attempt to cover what the Amazon warrior was already staring at. Eponin seemed to be getting into a lot of these situations lately. Ones where her brain was practically shaking her silly in an attempt to get her body moving in a backward direction, but damn, if the warrior could focus on anything but the sight of the two naked women in front of her. Of course, her roving eyes soon caught up to Xena's. Now, Eponin had swore, from her earlier incident with Xena, that six feet of Warrior Princess coming at you looked much larger when you were on your knees. She soon found she would have to amend that statement. Six feet of naked Warrior Princess looked immense. Granted, the whole situation seemed unfortunate and if Eponin had turned around immediately things may have gotten better. Even if the Amazon had apologized a few heartbeats later, it would have gone down as a terribly embarrassing incident, and they could have all laughed about it later...
much later, in Xena's opinion. The problem, as the warrior saw it, was that Eponin wasn't leaving. She stood there holding her sword, just staring at them. Not just them, more particularly, Gabrielle. Suddenly Xena was remembering the way Eponin had ogled the young Queen at the party earlier. Then with deliberate slowness, the warrior rose from the bed and moved toward the frozen Amazon. Gabrielle was finally able to pull the sheet around her, effectively shaking Eponin out of her suspended state. That's when she first noticed the Warrior Princess coming at her. "Xena," Gabrielle pleaded behind the warrior's back, "remember... don't kill her." She finished with a smirk toward the Amazon. "Oh, I'm not gonna kill her," Xena began, "I'm just gonna hurt her real bad!" She hissed. Eponin would also testify later that she thought she saw faint wisps of smoke coming from the warrior's ears. Looking over at Gabrielle, she said weakly, "I guess this is where I run, huh?" "Too late!" Xena said grabbing the immobile Amazon by the neck of her tunic and dragging her outside. For the second time in as many weeks the Amazon warrior found herself being launched over the porch rail of the Queen's veranda. Xena simply walked back into the hut and slammed the door shut. Eponin lay on her back in the dirt next to the Queen's hut. Letting out a painful groan, she looked over to where the two members of the Royal Guard were bent over in laughter. "If I ever get up again... you two are dead." The warrior said flatly. The laughter stopped at once and both women swallowed hard, looking at one another.
* * *
Gabrielle's body shook with laughter as Xena walked into the hut, shaking her head, and casting her bard a sheepish grin over the antics of their Amazon friend. Xena could never stay mad at Eponin for very long. "You're going to break her back if you keep throwing her from the porch like that," Gabrielle said, brushing tears of laughter from her eyes. "She's a warrior, she's tough. Besides, I didn't much care for the way she was looking at you. I do however enjoy the way you're looking at me... that look in your eyes, my Queen, is very flattering." Xena said, arching an eyebrow suggestively. In the past Gabrielle had only been able to steal glances at her warrior's body, now she was taking advantage of their newfound relationship to devour her lover's admirable qualities openly with her eyes. Xena enjoyed the blush that found its way to Gabrielle's cheeks. The warrior leaned upon the bed on one knee, supporting herself with a strong arm, while reaching up to slowly pull down the sheet that covered Gabrielle. "Allow me to return the favor," Xena drawled, taking full advantage as the bard had. She stretched the length of her body out next to her bard and ran a hand up the entire measure of Gabrielle's figure, stopping to gently stroke the bard's face. Gabrielle leaned into the touch, turning her head to place a kiss on the warrior's sword callused palm. "Where were we..." Xena smiled, reaching down to capture the bard's lips. Gabrielle never knew Xena's touch could be that tender. The young woman moaned into Xena's mouth at the gentleness of the kiss that seemed to go on forever.
"Do you enjoy my kisses, my love?" The warrior asked, her lips moving along the young woman's jaw, down to her neck, and back up to her ear, where she suckled the bard's earlobe. "My touch?" She cupped the underside of the bard's breast and brushed her thumb across the nipple, the flesh hardening under her caress. "Ohhhh..." was the only sound Gabrielle could make. Hmmm... speechless, my bard?" Xena whispered, continuing to kiss and stroke the young woman beside her. "You put my body through such an exquisite torture, I thought I'd return the compliment. Oh, and I will make it a delicious sort of torture, Gabrielle." The bard shivered at the sound of her name being drawn out in a seductive whisper, the warrior's warm breath licking against her ear. Xena lowered her body down onto Gabrielle's, resting her weight on her arms. Gabrielle moaned in pleasure at the feel of the warrior's body. Xena lowered her head until she took Gabrielle's lips with her own, reveling in the taste of the young woman, the warrior's tongue running across the bard's bottom lip as a promise of the delights the warrior's tongue could bring her. When Xena went to move away, Gabrielle's hands reached up, wrapping themselves in the warrior's hair, drawing her into another passionate kiss. Xena moved to nuzzle the bard's neck, using her lips, tongue, and teeth to lead her down the woman's throat. . The warrior smiled at the rapidly pounding pulse she found there. Gabrielle gasped when Xena pulled the flesh into her mouth and sucked long and hard. "I'm marking you... you're mine now, Gabrielle." Xena growled. "Gods, yes!" Gabrielle cried. Gabrielle's nipples tightened as Xena's flesh slid down the young woman's body.
"Please," Gabrielle whispered, arching her back, as Xena's fingers brushed across her erect nipples. Xena slowly enclosed one of the hardened nubs into her mouth and sucked greedily. Gabrielle whimpered at the loss when Xena's mouth left her breast, the warrior ceasing the complaint by covering the bard's mouth with her own. Parting the bard's lips with her tongue the firm muscle began to explore the young woman's mouth with an intensity that soon made the bard dizzy. Allowing her fingertips to return to the bard's breasts, Xena circled around Gabrielle's nipples before taking them between her thumbs and forefingers and squeezing rhythmically. Xena used her knee to gently spread Gabrielle's legs apart and moved her thigh in against the warm wetness. "Gods, Gabrielle..." she groaned into the bard's ear. "You're so wet." Xena found her passions rising higher unable to stop her own wetness that began to soak the bard's leg. She ground her thigh against the bard's center, eliciting a gasp of delight, feeling Gabrielle begin to rock her hips against the warrior's thigh. Xena couldn't believe how responsive the bard was. Everywhere she touched the young woman evoked a sound from Gabrielle's throat and every moan and gasp from the bard caused a flood of wetness to pour from the warrior's aroused sex. Xena slowly moved downward, her mouth and tongue sliding across the firm muscles of the bard's stomach, Gabrielle's legs spreading further apart as the warrior settled her shoulders between them. Breathing deeply, Xena's mouth watered at the scent of Gabrielle's passion, then she teasingly ran her tongue up the inside of Gabrielle's thighs. Xena's body shivered in delicious anticipation at the thought of tasting the bard's sweet wetness. In a display of pure seduction, the warrior reached her fingers up to slide her them between the bard's soaked folds.
"Yesss..." Gabrielle moaned, leaning up on one elbow to watch the warrior. Xena locked her gaze with Gabrielle and the young woman watched through heavy-lidded eyes as the warrior pulled her fingers from Gabrielle and brought them to her mouth, licking the bard's juices from her hand. "Sweet Artemis," the bard groaned, slamming her body back against the bed. The young woman felt she was dangerously close to simply exploding from need. "Please, Xena... I need..." Gabrielle pleaded. "I know what you need, Baby..." Xena purred, and Gabrielle thought she had died and gone to Ellysia simply at the sound of that voice. Xena slipped her hands under the bard's hips, pulling her to the warrior's waiting mouth. She ran her tongue along the length of the bard's entire sex, feeling Gabrielle's body shiver in response. The bard spread her legs even further, encouraging the warrior, as Xena buried her tongue deep into the bard's sweetness. Xena allowed her tongue to roam and explore her lover, delighting in the moans of pleasure coming from the bard. She reveled in the textures and taste of her young lover, feeling Gabrielle's hips begin to thrust upward against her tongue. Xena moved her tongue up and softly began stroking the hidden nub, now swollen with need. She slid a finger into the bard's opening, then two, sliding easily again and again into Gabrielle's soaking depths, never slowing the ministrations of her tongue on the bard's center. Gabrielle could scarcely form rational thought, her focus on the outside world narrowed to the center of her being, that was being so lovingly ravished by her warrior. She wrapped her fingers tightly in the warrior's raven locks, pressing the warrior's tongue harder to her. "Oh, God's, Xena... please... please, don't stop." Gabrielle cried out, her hips rising off the bed, thrusting harder against the tongue and fingers that promised her release.
Xena wrapped her arms around her lover's rocking hips, burying her face deeper, sucking hard while her tongue moved rapidly across the swollen nub. Gabrielle cried out her lover's name again and again as waves of release washed through her, contracting against the warrior's fingers inside her, the young woman's body convulsing as a second and then a third orgasm exploded within her. As Gabrielle lay spent, Xena crawled slowly up and kissed her tenderly, pulling the young woman into her strong embrace. The bard nuzzled Xena's neck, unable to speak. "Xena," Gabrielle began once her breathing had returned to normal. "Do you mean to tell me... all these years together... and we could have been doing that?" Xena chuckled and kissed the top of her bard's head. "Guess we've got some making up to do, huh?" "Will it always be like this?" Gabrielle asked in awe. "I don't know, love... I've never had this experience before." "I've had many lovers, Gabrielle," Xena said seriously in answer to the bewildered look on her lover's face. "Even the ones I thought I loved... Marcus, Hercules... I don't think I even knew what love was as a Warlord. I don't think I was capable of love back then. I had to relearn emotions like that, and I think I started the day you walked into my life." Xena felt Gabrielle's silent tears splash on her neck as she continued. "Gabrielle, I am so much in love with you... you are my heart, the very thing that keeps me alive. I need you as much as I need air to breathe and water to drink. If you ceased to exist, I believe my heart would simply stop beating." The warrior whispered, pressing her lips gently to the bard's temple. "Thank you, my bard... thank you for saving me."
Gabrielle looked up at her warrior, tears streaming down her face. "Xena, I've never heard you talk that way." "I'm sorry, Gabrielle. I'm sorry that I don't always say the kind of things you need to hear, or that I'm not always the kind of person you'd like me to be. I may not always be successful, but I promise to try my damnedest not to disappoint you or embarrass you." Gabrielle had never heard Xena speak so openly about her feelings before and the young bard was rather stunned. "Oh, Xena... your love could never disappoint or embarrass me... did you mean it... when you said you were in love with me?" Gabrielle asked. Xena turned so she was facing Gabrielle, wrapping her arms tighter, pulling the bard closer to her. Xena kissed Gabrielle's forehead, and brushed her lips across tear stained cheeks. "With all my heart, my love... all my heart." Xena pulled back to look into Gabrielle's face, gently stroking it with the back of her fingers. "You deserve better, though, my love. I know, --" Xena placed a finger over the bard's lips to silence what she knew was coming. "You're a grown woman and you're free to choose to love whomever you wish. You've claimed me and my heart couldn't be happier, but for the life of me, I can't figure out what you see in a broken down old warrior like me." "Oh, Xena... I wish you could see yourself through my eyes." Gabrielle said before slipping a hand around Xena's neck and kissing her as thoroughly as the warrior had ever been kissed. "You are so beautiful and I love you so much. I love all of you, Xena... the woman, the warrior, the light and the dark, and everything in-between." She said amid kisses. It was Xena's turn for tears and although the warrior rarely let anyone see her cry, she enjoyed the bittersweet release, and savored the feel of being held, Gabrielle's fingers lightly stroking her hair.
Both women were very near to sleep, lying in each other's arms when Xena lazily opened one eye to look at the bard. "Gabrielle...?" "Mmm hhm," Gabrielle replied drowsily. "This week... the things you were doing, I mean when you--Gabrielle, were you seducing me?" Xena asked. Gabrielle's eyes were wide open and she was definitely awake now. "Uhm... yes?" "Are you asking me or telling me?" Xena too was now fully awake. "Telling you?" Gods, that even sounds pathetic to me. Xena turned from the bard's embrace and shifted her body more fully on top of the young woman. "Do you mean to tell me you were doing those things to me on purpose? And did you enjoy how crazy you were making me?" "Well... I--I... it seemed like a good thing to do at the time... and I really didn't do it on purpose... at first. But, I mean, by then I rather... well, enjoyed how it affected you." Gabrielle looked up at the warrior with her best innocent look. "You, my love, are a tease." Xena said raising an eyebrow at the woman under her. "Technically you can't call me a tease," the bard countered defiantly. "After all a tease is someone who acts suggestively, with no intention of following through on her promises... I, on the other hand, had every intention of making good on my promise." Gabrielle finished with a smug grin, feeling as though she just talked her way out of something.
"Gab-ri-elle..." Xena drawled. "Do you know what warriors do to women who tease them... even ones they love with all their heart?" Xena said the words slowly, wrapping her arms around the young women and leaning in to nuzzle the bard's neck, nipping the soft flesh. "Get even?" Gabrielle said weakly, the self-satisfied smile gone and her pulse beginning to race. "Mmm hmmm," Xena murmured, biting down softly on an earlobe.
I have a feeling this 'getting even' may be quite enjoyable... if it doesn't kill me first, was Gabrielle's last coherent thought as Xena covered the bard's mouth with a burning kiss.
THE END
QUEST FOR A QUEEN DISCLAIMER:
Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, etc. are ©copyright MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. I don't own them, I just play with them for a while and, like the good girl I am, I put them back when I'm done... okay, they get a little worn, but hey... I play hard! Absolutely no Copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fiction. It's intended as flattery toward the creators and actors of the characters. All other characters that appear are ©copyright
[email protected] This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way (unless, of course, Lucy, Renee, Rob, et al want to make my dream come true and hire me, hah!). Copies may be made for private use only and I'd appreciate if you included all copyright notices and this disclaimer. VIOLENCE WARNING: There is some violence (come on it's the Warrior Princess), battle scene type stuff. It
does get pretty bloody at the end, but if you can handle PG13 you shouldn't be too bothered. SEX: Yup, it's here! I mean it is Xena and Gabrielle, after all. It's not gratuitous, but it is explicit when it gets
going. This story shows consensual love/sex between two adult females. Consider yourself warned if you find that kind of thing offensive. UNDERAGE WARNING: Hey, the Supreme Court said in Reno v. American Civil Liberties Union (1997) that
laws against making available, online, certain "indecent" materials for those under 18 was unconstitutional... look it up! Besides, this is perfectly "decent." OTHER DISCLAIMERS: The words to the song that Xena sings to Gabrielle are actually the lyrics to the song
"No Place That Far", sung by Sara Evans (words & music: Sara Evans/Tom Shapiro/Tony Martin), and are used here without permission or intent to profit. MESSAGE FROM THE AUTHOR: I usually don't "explain" a title... you either get it or you don't, but I must be
getting soft. The title of this piece is apt and I thank my friend, Gloria for the use of her gray cells in coming up with it in the first place. It is not only the physical Quest for a woman, but also Gabrielle's own Quest to find out who she is as a woman, a bard, a lover & friend, and as an Amazon Queen. I only know how others feel about my stories from feedback. Let me know what you think about it, or what you might like to see in the future... homophobes need not apply, however. I'm at:
[email protected] I promised her I would... so here it is! A dedication to Gloria for her help in coming up with a title that I could live with for this piece. BTW... Here's to all my muses for this piece... The Xmas Misfits.
This is the second story in the "Queen" series. While not absolutely necessary, you may want to read the first story, "To Become A Queen," just to keep up.
QUEST FOR A QUEEN
PART I
THE FOOD HUT was mostly deserted, but Amazons were beginning to filter in for a midday meal. Gabrielle had been sitting there; just staring into the unknown, a full plate of food lying barely touched in front of her. Her slim, muscular frame rested in a wooden chair at the head of the Queen's table, her mind went where her mind spent most of its time in the last fortnight, to a certain Warrior Princess. Since they'd become lovers, their evenings were spent in a passionate haze behind a barred door to the Queen's quarters. Actually, more than just their evenings, the Queen mused to herself. Nighttime, daytime, afternoons, once sapphire blue eyes, captured emerald green a tacit message was passed, and the two lovers would find themselves creating reasons to be alone in the same room. They had christened nearly every hideaway available in the Amazon village, and most of the surrounding countryside. "Hi there," Xena said with a smile, kissing the top of the seated woman's
head, and pulling her from her reverie. Gabrielle reached behind her to embrace the dark-haired warrior, and pulled up short, immediately stopping the taller woman by placing the palm of her hand on the warrior's breastplate. "Eeewwww, Warrior... you smell," she said with a grimace, continuing to hold her at arms length. Xena chuckled as she straightened back up. "I ought to, considering I've been sparring with your best and brightest all morning. Here, I'll sit downwind... is that any better?" She finished, taking a seat on a bench just to the Queen's left. "Just barely," Gabrielle smiled. Suddenly she leaned over the table, capturing the warrior's lips in a gentle kiss that turned heated quickly. "Mmmm," Gabrielle moaned, "that was definitely worth the risk." The young Queen moved back into her seat, never releasing the azure eyes that now sparkled with unspoken desire. "Oh, get a room," Eponin exclaimed, witnessing the passionate exchange. "Is this a private army, or can anyone enlist?" the Amazon warrior asked with a mischievous smile, indicating a seat at the Queen's table. "Sit," both women invited in unison, never breaking their eye contact with one another. Eponin arranged herself at the table and began to eat her meal, watching with amusement, the exchange between Xena and Gabrielle. The walls
could fall down around them and I don't think they'd notice! "Hello?" Eponin asked, waving her hand between the two women. "How's your back, Ep?" Xena said with a wry smile, finally releasing the Queens' gaze. "Fine, no thanks to you!" Eponin exclaimed, trying to look fierce. She failed
considering the fact that she began to blush and it's hard for an Amazon Warrior to look tough while her ears are turning red. "What a nice shade of scarlet," Gabrielle smiled sweetly, looking at Xena and nodding her head in Eponin's direction. Which simply made Eponin turn an even brighter shade of red. Since the last incident involving Eponin, and a very naked Xena and Gabrielle, the Amazon had been having trouble looking her Queen directly in the eye. "Oh, thanks, Gabrielle... just jump on the bandwagon and kick me while I'm down." The warrior finished dejectedly. "Oh, Ep," the Queen laughed, "you're too cute!" "Gabrielle!" Eponin cried, lowering her voice to a whisper, "I'm a warrior... please don't call me cute." Still laughing at the embarrassed Amazon, Gabrielle rose from her seat, "I hate to leave when we're having so much fun at your expense, but I have work to do." Pushing her untouched plate of food toward Xena she indicated the warrior should finish it. "Gabrielle, you haven't even touched this," grasping the young woman's hand as she passed, "are you sure you feel allright?" Xena questioned with concern. "Yea, just not as hungry as I thought," Gabrielle smiled at her lover. "You better finish it," she said leaning in to whisper into Xena's ear, "you're going to need your strength... for later." She finished, kissing the warrior gently. "See ya, Ep," the young Queen said with a smile as she gracefully made her way through the maze of tables in the hut. Stopping to talk to one of the Royal Guard, Gabrielle smiled seductively in Xena's direction, before leaving the building. "Don't worry, Xena... she's fine, just in love that's all," Eponin said between
bites, motioning toward Gabrielle's uneaten food. "It's written all over her face. That pathetic 'I'm so in love' look. Trust me, I can tell it from a league away." Yea, well, how do I look?" Xena said turning to look at the Amazon. "Absolutely pathetic," Eponin returned. Xena laughed loud and long at the Amazon's characterization of her. Yep, I bet I do look absolutely pathetic, she thought to herself, unable to remove the goofy grin from her face. But, what a way to go! With that the warrior dug into Gabrielle's forgotten repast, taking the young Queen's promise literally. "Xena?" The warrior turned to see Daria, the member of the Royal Guard Gabrielle had been talking with before she left the food hut. Xena had finished her meal and now she and Eponin were sharing a drink before heading off to the baths. The Guard leaned toward the warrior slightly, lowering her voice. "Her Highness has requested that a bath be drawn for you in your quarters, she also said she would meet you there later." Daria looked slightly disconcerted at being the harbinger for what would most certainly turn out to be a romantic liaison between the Queen and her consort. The Amazon took it in stride, however, straightening herself and walking off, missing the amused, yet lustful glint in the eye of the Warrior Princess. * * *
"Stop, right there warrior." The voice ordered the instant Xena entered the hut she shared with Gabrielle. The warrior froze, her back facing the speaker, the hairs along the back of her neck rising in response. Xena's eyes instantly took in the interior of the hut, even before stepping
through the door. The storm shutters were pulled closed on the windows, leaving only the slats above each window open, allowing in the warm summer breeze. The room was heavy with moisture; tendrils of steam rose from heated water, dissipating into the air. The closed windows effectively eliminated the light of day, but candles of varying sizes had been placed throughout the hut, the light from their flames dancing and flickering against the walls. She briefly closed her eyes, taking in the fragrance of warmed rose oil, burning wax, and a scent the warrior had come to crave, one that made her mouth water from the mere notion... ... Gabrielle. "Don't turn around." Gabrielle demanded. Xena was utterly captivated by the commanding tone in the young Queen's voice. Gods, who'd have thought Gabrielle ordering me around could be
so arousing? Who would have thought I'd let anyone have that kind of power over me? "Remove your armor." Xena quickly began removing her weapons and armor beginning with her breastplate, ending with her greaves and shin guards. "Stop." Xena stood, leaving her leg protectors and boots untouched. "Slow down... I'm enjoying the view."
Six-foot puddle time! To Xena's ears the words were practically purred as she thought about melting into a puddle in the middle of the floor, just from the sound of her lover's voice. Not only her bard's words but also the tone and timbre caused an
immediate reaction in Xena's inflamed body. She felt the familiar tightening in her belly, followed by an increased flood of liquid between her legs. The warrior continued, slowly and painstakingly drawing leather straps through buckles, willing a little control into her already trembling fingers. Divested of her battle armor she stood waiting for her next command. "Your breeches... take them off." Xena hooked a thumb in each side of her now soaked undergarment and slid them down and off her legs. She was actually amazed the cloth pulled away from her body without a slurping sound, as wet as she was. "Now, turn around." Xena slowly turned and the breath caught in her throat. Gods, she's
beautiful. Gabrielle was leaning against the back of a narrow, yet long tub, the length easily able to accommodate the warrior's size. The young woman's arms lay draped across the outside rim, her fingers dangling in the water. The young Queen's body stretched out languidly in the steaming water, her face flushed from either the heat or simply desire. The bard's hair had been swept up and pulled back from her face and neck, held in place with a delicate ivory comb. Xena focused on the young woman's green eyes, dark with desire. "Start with the laces." Gabrielle said, not turning away from the warrior's gaze, beginning to feel an insistent pressure between her own legs that begged for release. Xena reached behind her and began to loosen the laces at her back. Stopping, she let her arms fall to her sides, lowering her eyes to the floor. "Very good... at least I have you well trained," Gabrielle praised. Xena's eyes shot up and captured the bard's with a touch of fire in the
azure depths, the muscles in her neck tightening. Gabrielle thought she had overplayed her hand by the look in her warrior's eye, but she continued, overlooking the battle of wills that was silently taking place. "Continue," the bard said encouragingly. Xena very nearly stopped the whole scenario. It took a lot for the warrior to succumb to another's will, even if the other was as beautiful as her bard was, then again, she knew there was a difference here. Xena knew there was love and trust here, it's the only reason this domination fantasy excited her. Her submission had never... would never, take place with anyone but Gabrielle. There was one more reason it thrilled her, and that's because it aroused her Amazon Queen every bit as much as the warrior. Xena slid the straps of the tunic off each shoulder and let her leathers fall down her body. This time it was Gabrielle's turn to gasp. She tried to hold it in, but the sight of the Warrior Princess, naked and prepared to submit to the bard's will, caused a sharp intake of breath, and an increased ache in her center. Xena's body was magnificent even streaked with grime and sweat from the practice field. "Get in," Gabrielle said huskily. Xena walked over and stepped into the tub, never breaking eye contact with the bard. "Turn around and sit." Gabrielle ordered, starting to breathe a little heavier now that her warrior was so close. The young woman reached for a cloth and soap, and began the slow process of lathering the skin of the warrior. She started at her neck, to her shoulders, well-muscled back, and down each strong arm. When the water covered the parts of the warrior's body that Gabrielle wanted to reach, she leaned against Xena's back, the young woman's nipples pressing deliciously into the warrior's flesh.
"Stand up," Gabrielle whispered in her ear. Xena stood, thin rivulets of water cascading down her perfectly toned body. Gabrielle continued her washing, bath cloth in hand, running down the outside of each long leg, returning up the inside, stopping just short of the dark patch of curls. She discarded the cloth and ran both soapy palms up the back of Xena's thighs, continuing up to massage the warrior's buttocks, enjoying the way the warrior's muscles jumped when they felt the smoothness of the bard's hand instead of the cloth. "Turn around and kneel," Gabrielle again commanded. Xena, once again, did as she was bid, kneeling in the heated water. Taking the soapy cloth, Gabrielle gave the front of her body the same treatment as the back, beginning at her neck. When the bard brushed the fabric over a hardened nipple, Xena managed to hold back a moan, but closed her eyes, arching her body into the pleasing touch. "Oh, no, warrior," Gabrielle warned. "I don't want you losing yourself in the sensations just yet. Keep your eyes open or I'll have to stop." Xena's eyelids snapped open at the admonition from the Queen. Gabrielle tossed the cloth into the water, running the soap through her fingers to create lather. She resumed her work on the warrior's body, once again foregoing the cloth and using her hands instead. The bard was having an enormous amount of difficulty just trying to stay focused. Xena's skin felt like the softest Egyptian silk against her slick fingers. She felt every muscle and sinew in the warrior's powerful chest, her thumbs lazily stroking the nipples into tightened nubs. Xena bit her lip to keep from crying out at the pleasure, but the bard's next move was too much for the warrior's already raging libido. Gabrielle slid her hands down the warrior's flat abdomen, the muscles clenching as she skimmed her hands across the flesh. She cautiously ran sudsy fingers through the dark curls between the warrior's legs. Slow and deliberate, the bard keeping her touch away from where Xena needed it
most. Suddenly the young woman slid her fingers down further, her soapy hand mingling with the warrior's warm wetness. "Oh, Gods," Xena threw her head back, eyes closing, and moaned. Gabrielle abruptly pulled away from the aroused warrior causing Xena to instantly realize her indiscretion. "It's apparent you didn't take my warning seriously, warrior... I think we're done here." Gabrielle snapped as she started to move away. "No!" Xena's hand shot out, grabbing the bard's wrist. Gabrielle merely looked at Xena's hand locked onto hers, raising an eyebrow and the warrior released her grip at once. Breathing hard, Xena willed her arms to the side of her body and lowered her eyes. "Please, forgive me my Queen," the warrior pleaded. By the Gods... am I
begging? By the Gods, is she begging? "This is your last chance... there will be no others. Don't make me tie your hands." Gabrielle said softly. Xena's pulse raced faster at the words, but she held her tongue, and Gabrielle decided to save that little fantasy for another time. The young Queen placed two fingers under the warrior's chin and tilted her face till their eyes met. Leaning in she began placing a series of kisses on Xena's mouth, none of which the warrior responded to. "Very good," Gabrielle smiled at the warrior's control. "Kiss me," she commanded, leaning in again to capture Xena's lips. The warrior responded fervently, straining against the idea of wrapping her arms around the bard and pulling the young woman closer to her. Suddenly Xena moaned into Gabrielle's kiss when, without warning, the bard's fingers resumed their exploration of Xena's slick folds. Breaking away from the kiss, Gabrielle moved to whisper in the warrior's
ear. "Is this what you wanted to feel?" "Oh, yes!" Xena responded quickly. "Do you see what happens when you're obedient?" Gabrielle questioned, not stopping the teasing motion of her fingers. "Yes, my Queen," Xena's labored breathing proof of the physical pleasure. The warrior's well-trained body promptly grasped the concept. Do as you're told and be rewarded. And, oh, she felt very rewarded. All too quickly the bard removed her fingers, eliciting a whimper of protest from the dark-haired woman. "Soon, my love... very soon," Gabrielle said, picking up a sponge to rinse the soap from Xena's body. Gabrielle washed the warrior's hair, then dipped her hands in the bowl of warm rose oil, massaging the slick liquid into the warrior's quivering muscles. Occasionally the bard would flick her tongue over a hardened nipple, slip a slender finger between the warrior's legs, and suck on a sensitive earlobe until Xena's body trembled constantly with unfulfilled desire. Xena could not tell how much time had passed since she first entered the hut; her body was being constantly rewarded, then deprived of the bard's fiery touch. "Stand up," Gabrielle said forcefully. Xena stretched her frame out of the water and stood before the kneeling Queen. The warrior felt Gabrielle's warm breath and it chilled her skin as the bard leaned in to capture a droplet of moisture with her tongue as it rolled down the warrior's abdomen. Advancing her tongue further, she slipped the tip past the dark patch of hair and into the warrior's sweet wetness. Xena balled her hands into fists, clenching them tightly against the white hot bolt of desire that swept through her body. She fought the
temptation to thrust her hips forward, not wanting to give in simply to have the bard pull away like before. "Spread your legs apart," Gabrielle murmured into Xena's flesh. Xena complied moving her feet up to the walls of the narrow tub. Gabrielle pushed her tongue in further and placed two fingers at Xena's opening, teasing the flesh there with small circular motions. A flood of wetness washed over the bard's tongue as Xena realized what was about to happen, her body responding to Gabrielle's stimulation. "Is this what you want, warrior?" Gabrielle said, replacing her tongue with her right thumb, continue to lightly stroke around the swollen folds. "Gods, Yesss," Xena panted. "My tongue... or my fingers?" Gabrielle smiled at the sudden look of indecision on the warrior's face. "I'll reward you with both, but first you have to promise me one more thing, warrior..." Xena looked down at the bard, looking mischievously back up at her. "You're not allowed to come until I give you permission." Xena groaned at the words the bard had just spoken. She was just beginning to think that she was so close to the edge now, only a few strokes from her lover's tongue and she would be screaming in ecstasy. "Warrior... do you enjoy pleasuring me... enjoy my taste?" Xena's mouth began to water at the mere thought of Gabrielle's taste, the spicy sweetness that flowed so easily from the young woman; that was so distinctly her bard. "Yes, my Queen," Xena gasped through ragged breaths. "If you come without my permission, I'll pleasure myself and this evening
will be over. Do you understand?" "Yes, my Queen... I understand." Xena answered. Upon Xena's assent, Gabrielle slipped her tongue inside the spread legs, pushing her fingers one step closer to their goal. Xena moaned loudly as wave after wave of previously denied pleasure washed over her body. Gabrielle removed her tongue and stilled her hand, licking away the wetness that coated the inside of the warrior's thighs. "Now, tell me, my warrior... what is it you want," Gabrielle looked up and asked the pleasure delirious woman. Xena, who had previously had trouble voicing her needs and desires to her young lover, looked down at the young woman with an intense gaze that burned red hot with need. "Fuck me, my Queen," she hissed through clenched teeth. The warrior gasped as Gabrielle plunged two fingers inside her, gliding the digits in and out with slow precision. "More." Xena begged until three then four fingers thrust themselves into her body. Barely able to form the words, Xena cried out, "harder... Gods, harder." She thrust herself against the bard's hand, her hips grinding down against her lover's muscular arm. "Remember, warrior... not without my permission." Xena growled in frustration, begging her body to back off, feeling she was quickly losing the battle when her thighs began to tremble uncontrollably, a new flood of wetness indicating her impending orgasm. Her hands clenched the rim of the tub, her knees threatening to give way. Xena's eyes met Gabrielle's; both women dangerously near the edge. "Please--my--Queen" Xena begged.
"Now," was all the Queen said. Xena threw back her head and howled her release, her legs finally giving way. As she dropped to her knees, her hands, still clamped onto the sides of the tub, were shaking wildly. Her body continued to convulse, pulsating rhythmically around the bard's fingers, and as the bard continued the motion of her hand inside her body, another orgasm ripped through the warrior's frame. Gabrielle wrapped deceivingly strong arms around the warrior, Xena's head buried in he smaller woman's shoulder. "I've got you, love... I've got you," Gabrielle whispered. * * *
"Oh, Gods... you are trying to get even, aren't you?" Gabrielle moaned lying completely spent on the bed the two women shared. Xena grinned and moved up the young woman's body, gently kissing the sensitive flesh, until their lips met in a passionate kiss filled with the promises of a lifetime to come. Gabrielle moaned again, as she tasted herself on the warrior's tongue. "How did you guess?" Xena said with an evil grin when both women finally pulled away to breathe. The warrior lay on her back and Gabrielle felt herself wrapped in strong loving arms. The bard nuzzled Xena's neck, lightly kissing the bruise she'd put there earlier. "Xena... do you think there's something wrong with me?" Gabrielle tentatively questioned. "Of course not, love... Gabrielle, why would you even ask such a thing?"
Xena answered, pulling away slightly to look at her lover. "It's just... well, this," she motioned with her hand toward the both of them. "I mean, well... the way we are... I mean--" "Gabrielle, you keep saying 'I mean', but I'm not sure what you mean." Xena said, confused by her lover's questioning. "I mean..." Gabrielle stopped at Xena's small smile at the same two words. "Xena, I want you all the time!" The bard blurted out. "I thought it was because it was all so new at first, but it only seems to be getting worse, if you know what I mean. It's like making love to you is some kind of need... I feel absolutely driven, and I know that can't be normal." The young woman finished with tears in her eyes. "Gabrielle," Xena said, gently cradling the bard's face in her strong hands, "It is a need... we've been in love with each other for so long, we do need each other, and there's nothing abnormal about that. As for the physical part of our relationship... I feel exactly the same way you do. Lately, it seems if I'm not making love to you, I'm thinking about making love to you. This is new... for both of us. I've never been in love like this before so we're just going to have to write our own rules and take each day as it comes. I know one thing, though, my love..." Xena flipped the bard over so she was on her back and began to lay gentle kisses on her neck, working her way toward Gabrielle's ear. "You are the most beautiful... most incredible... sexiest... woman I have ever known." The warrior punctuated each word with a kiss. "How could I not want you all the time?" she finished, capturing Gabrielle's lips in a burning kiss that immediately drove the young woman's doubts and fears away. "Xena?" Gabrielle was desperately trying not to be carried away by the warrior's kisses. "Mmmm?" was Xena's reply as she continued to kiss her way down the young woman's neck.
"I'd like to tell my family about us." Gabrielle finished, counting the heartbeats that went by, her eyes shut tight waiting for the explosion. "You want to what?" Xena said, astonished. "Gabrielle, your parents hate me... are you sure you're ready for the reaction you might get?" The young Queen's emerald eyes took on a serious hue, "I can kind of guess what kind of reaction I'll get, but it's something I need to do... more for me, rather... us, than anyone else. Xena, it's just that if anything should ever happen to us, I want people... our families... to know how we felt about one another... what we meant to each other. I want them to know that no matter what, I loved you until my dying day, and that I'd do anything... go anywhere... fight anyone, just to be by your side. Tears filled the warrior's blue eyes as she leaned up to lightly brush her lips across her lover's forehead, returning to snare the bard's soft full lips in a breath stealing kiss. Gabrielle was constantly amazed at how the former Destroyer of Nations could be so gentle, have a caress so delicate and full of love. "Oh, Gabrielle... do you know how much I love you? Even realize what you mean to me? That my heart beats only for you... because of you? My heart is so connected to yours... through all eternity, Gabrielle... you are my soul mate." Brushing away the bard's own tears of love, Xena continued, "Just one thing, my love. If you're determined to do this, then let's do it right. We'll both go to Potidaea and tell your family together. We can travel on to Amphipolis from there and tell my mother and Toris. What do you say?" "Xena, are you sure about telling your family, too?" "I've never been more sure of anything, my bard." Xena said with a kiss and a smile she reserved only for her bard. Gabrielle wrapped her arms tightly around the warrior's neck. "I love you, Xe." She whispered.
Xena smiled at her lover's use of a shortened version of her name. "I love you, too, Gabrielle." The warrior finally pulled away from the exquisite embrace. "Gabrielle, I have something for you," she said, leaving the bed to search through her saddlebags. "Actually," she continued to speak as she dug to the bottom of the bag, "I had this made quite a while ago, but I never thought I'd actually be giving it to you." Looking up with a bittersweet grin she caught the bard's gaze. "I guess I had it made because it was something I would have liked to give you if I'd ever had the courage to tell you how I felt about you." Returning to the bed, she sat next to the bard and handed her a small wooden box. Gabrielle reached out a tentative hand for the gift, wondering what the warrior could have had made, and kept a secret for so long. Lifting the lid, Gabrielle gasped aloud at the elegance of such a gift. The box was lined with purple silk and lying inside was a pendant unlike any other. Two hearts had been formed from the shape and scrollwork of Xena's breastplate, each heart holding a small stone, one blue sapphire and one emerald green. The hearts had been joined together at the points so that they created the letter X.
"Oh, Xena... it's so beautiful," Gabrielle said breathlessly. "Let's see how it looks on you, huh?" Xena said, smiling at the look of unadulterated love radiating from her bard's face. The warrior moved to sit behind the young Queen and clasped the delicate chain around her neck. Moving her arms around the smaller woman in front of her, Xena pressed her body in tightly against the bard and whispered in her ear. "This is more than just a pendant. I've never given away my heart like this before; I trust you to keep it safe for me. It also extracts a promise from you, Gabrielle. It puts an X, my mark, over your heart... my heart over your heart. It shows that you belong to me and no other, just as I belong to you." Gabrielle reached up and placed her hand over the pendant, lying above her heart, just as Xena placed her own hand on top of the bard's. The warrior reached down and placed soft kisses on the Queen's shoulder, pulling their bodies closer together. Sitting yoga style, each woman wrapped around the other, their hands over the pendant, it was as if they had truly become one. "I'll never let anyone take it from me," Gabrielle promised.
"Pain to the person who tries," Xena said gravely. With Xena's words Gabrielle felt her skin tingle where the pendant touched her. It had come and gone so quickly that the bard didn't know if the feeling had been real or imagined. "So, when do we go?" Gabrielle questioned. "Is day after tomorrow too soon?" Xena responded. "That's fine with me. Xena, did you want to be on the road again by now?" Gabrielle asked. Xena wrapped her arms even tighter around the Amazon Queen and spoke into her ear so softly it was barely a whisper; "I go where you go, my Queen... my home is where you are." Halting her words with a kiss then a caress; the two women once again lost themselves to their passions. * * *
Leaving the Amazon village was never easy for Gabrielle, but after so much time spent among her friends, their parting was a melancholy affair. Gabrielle leaned her cheek against Xena's back as they both rode atop Argo, thanking Artemis once again for a regent and a friend such as Ephiny. "Wake up, sleepyhead," Xena teased, placing a gentle hand on her lover's thigh. "Mmmm... I'm not sleeping, just thinking," was the bard's lazy reply. "Thinking or worrying?"
"You know me too well," the bard smiled and kissed Xena's neck. "I guess a little of both, though. I'm not sure if we shouldn't just keep Argo saddled and ready for a quick escape." Xena pulled Gabrielle's arms tighter around her waist and wrapped her own free arm around them protectively. "Remember, Brie... we're in this together." "What?" Xena asked, turning to look at Gabrielle after not having received a response from her bard. "It's just that I don't think you've ever called me anything but Gabrielle in all the time we've known each other. Why Brie?" "I don't know..." the warrior stammered, a slight blush beginning to creep up her neck. "... It just came out." "I like it. I especially like a name that only you call me." Gabrielle smiled against the skin of the warrior's neck. Gabrielle began to place a series of small kisses along the bare skin of Xena's neck and shoulders, anywhere her lips could reach that wasn't covered with armor. Her bard's tender lips caused a sensation that slammed hard into Xena's center, eliciting a groan from the warrior. "Gabrielle," the warrior said breathlessly. "At this rate it's going to take us a week to get to Potidaea." "Why is that, my love?" Gabrielle asked, feigning innocence, and pushing Xena's hair to one side to run the tip of her tongue along the nape of the warrior's neck. "Because we're making camp for the night!" Xena finished, abruptly guiding the mare off the well-traveled path and into the woods.
* * *
"Anybody home?" Gabrielle asked, waving her hand in front of her lover's eyes. "Oh, I'm sorry, Brie... I was just thinking." Xena returned from her thoughts as she stared into the flames of the campfire. "Thinking or worrying?" Xena flashed a smile to her young lover as her earlier words were tossed back at her. "A little bit of both I guess," she returned with a grin. "Can I help?" Gabrielle asked "As a matter of fact, yes... we need to talk, Brie." The warrior finished seriously. The look on the bard's face told Xena the young woman had misinterpreted her intentions. "Oh, no... it's nothing bad, just some stuff I thought we needed to talk about." "Oh," Gabrielle said smiling at her own anxiety. "I thought--well, I guess there's always a tiny part of me that's still waiting for you to leave me in Potidaea." She said, embarrassed at her own apprehension. "Never, my bard..." Xena pulled her lover into her lap and enveloped the smaller woman in her warm embrace. "Gabrielle, I'll say it again and again if you need to hear it, but I'll never leave you. I plan on making your life miserable until we're old and gray." The warrior finished with a twinkle in her blue eyes. "That's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about... being around until we're old and gray. I don't want you to take this the wrong way, considering, as you can plainly see, I have a hard time just keeping my hands off of you. It's just that... well... in the Amazon village we were pretty free to... well, kiss,
and... you know, whenever we wanted, but now that we're on the road again... strange people and towns--" "Oh, Xe, it's allright, I understand. I would never embarrass you in public--" "No, love... your touch could never embarrass me. You could kiss me thoroughly in front of my own mother and it wouldn't embarrass me." The warrior smiled tenderly. "I'll take you up on that someday, you know" Gabrielle teased. "I was thinking more about focus. I don't want us to get so caught up in each other that we lose track of what's going on around us. You know it could spell trouble if we become too oblivious to our surroundings. It's not a good thing for a warrior to be so distracted." "And am I a distraction?" Gabrielle asked, nuzzling the warrior's neck. "You, my love, are a most pleasant distraction," the warrior teased, kissing the tip of her lover's nose. "Gabrielle smiled and returned the gentle kiss. "So, not so much of this?" Gabrielle motioned toward their crumpled bedrolls that had been straightened and strewn about the camp twice since dinner. "Or maybe just when we stay at an inn or in town?" "Well, don't go crazy on me here," the warrior's body already beginning to feel denied. "I just thought maybe we should be a little more selective about the 'when and the where'... not necessarily the 'how often'." Gabrielle laughed at the dejected look on her lover's face. "I would never deny you, my love," she whispered seductively. Xena growled as the sultry sound of the bard's voice wrenched a reaction from her body. "I'd carry you to the bedroll this very second, but I want to check the area before we get too comfortable." She said putting some space between she and the bard before she gave up on that plan
altogether. "Xena," Gabrielle called as the warrior moved into the darkness. "Now that we're lovers it kind of gives 'checking the perimeter' a whole new meaning, doesn't it?" she smiled. Xena froze and turned to look back at the young woman. "You knew?" "Xe... what did you think I was doing back here when you went off to pleasure yourself?" Gabrielle asked, smiling sweetly. The vision that thrust itself to the forefront of the warrior's mind made her eyes go wide. She promptly turned to make her way to the edge of camp, but not before Gabrielle heard the warrior's low groan of arousal. * * *
Riding toward the small village of Potidaea, Xena felt Gabrielle's body language change, as the young woman in the saddle behind her pressed herself tighter against the warrior. To Xena, Gabrielle had always been happy to see her family, especially her sister Lila, but there was always a little imperceptible something that changed when the bard was back in her home village. "Why don't we take a break," Xena offered, "I'm kind of thirsty. Besides there's only another couple of candlemarks till we're in Potidaea." Gabrielle agreed a little rest would be a good idea. Actually, the closer she got to home the more nervous she became, until she was holding on to Xena so tight she feared she'd suffocate the poor warrior. Sitting under a tree, both women relaxed in the shade, realizing that summer's warm breezes were slowly coming to an end. "What was it like growing up in Potidaea, Brie?" Xena asked nonchalantly.
Gabrielle looked up at her warrior, a thin smile barely covering a look of pain. "I don't know... I guess like every other farming community in Greece." Xena continued. "It's just that you don't talk much about growing up here. I mean, I'm always telling you about how Lyceus and I went fishing or swimming, how I learned to ride a horse, or use a sword... I'll never figure out how you drag those stories out of me, anyway." She said with a smile toward her bard. Gabrielle shrugged as if to say there wasn't much to tell. "Come 'ere," Xena encouraged pulling the smaller woman into her lap. Kissing her temple, the warrior enjoyed the familiar warmth of her partner. "Growing up here wasn't a real happy time for me." Gabrielle said as she lay her head against the warrior's chest. "I gathered that much... can't you talk about it? Even to me, Brie?" Xena said tenderly stroking her lover's face. "It's just that I felt very... out of place here." Gabrielle said slowly. "Of course anyone with half a wit and a whole brain would, but it was more than just the town. Xe, I felt that way with my family. Lila and I have been as close as sisters can be, but my mother was always so distant, and... well, you know how my father treats me. It wasn't a whole lot better when I was younger. I just always felt like--like an outsider." She finished softly. "You and I, my love, have more in common than you think." The warrior commented, holding her lover to her tightly. "Can I ask a question?" "Hhmmm?" "Why is it so important for you to come here and tell them about us if that's the way you think they feel about you?" Xena asked. Straightening herself up to look in her lover's eyes, Gabrielle said determinedly, "Because I want them to know who I am... who I really am."
Xena sat there looking into the proud, beautiful features of her lover and felt another piece of that old wall around her heart, hit the ground. "Gabrielle... what did I ever do to deserve a woman as wonderful as you in my life." Punctuating her remarks with a heartfelt kiss. "I don't know, but you're stuck with me now," the bard laughed. Xena leapt to her feet still holding Gabrielle in her arms. "Well, you're too small to even throw back." The tall warrior teased. "Xena... put me down!" Gabrielle squealed. "You're going to have to ask nicer than that," the warrior said wiggling her eyebrows. Gabrielle began lightly kissing the warrior's neck. "Please, my love... would you put me down?" Then she wrapped both arms around Xena's neck and kissed her passionately. When the kiss finally ended, both women found breathing a little more difficult than when they started. "Gabrielle..." Xena said, her voice suddenly ragged with desire. The warrior's eyes looked into the bard's and then off into the woods, the silent plea understood by the woman in her arms. "Uh huh," Gabrielle nodded her assent, as the warrior carried her into the shadows of the forest. * * *
Xena pulled Gabrielle up into the saddle behind her, the smile of a truly satisfied warrior on her face.
"Xe," Gabrielle slapped her arm, "if you don't get that goofy grin off your face the whole town's going to know what we've been doing, and we won't need to tell my family anything!" "What goofy grin?" Xena made an effort to remove the smile, but failed. "That goofy grin," Gabrielle said, turning the warrior to face her slightly. "Well, you put it there... maybe you should do something to get rid of it. "Xena!" Gabrielle exclaimed. "Oh, allright... I'll try." Moments passed and Gabrielle quickly leaned up in the saddle to catch a glimpse of the warrior's face. "Xena!" "I'm trying!" the warrior shouted back. Placing a phony scowl on her face, she turned back to the bard. "Better?" "Yes. Thank you, love." A few more moments passed and the grin had again found it's way to the warrior's face. "Aaarrggh!" Gabrielle moaned. Shaking her head in vain against her lover's back. * * *
Lila was the first to catch a glimpse of the pair as they rode toward the small farm. "Gabrielle!" the younger girl shouted, waving. "Mother, come quick."
By the time the lovers rode up to the small cottage, Lila and Gabrielle's mother, Hecuba where waiting. Xena stood by and let the women greet and exchange pleasantries, not able to take her eyes off her beautiful bard. A fact that wasn't lost on Hecuba. "Hello, Xena," Hecuba offered, surprising the warrior with her cordiality. "Hecuba," Xena reached out her hand to grasp the older woman's. "Well, let's get inside, shall we? Xena if you'll be staying for a visit, you're welcome to stable your mare in the barn." Hecuba said brushing her hands brusquely across the folds of her apron. "Come on girls... Gabrielle, do you eat anything at all when you're traveling out on the road... you're skin and bones." The three women made their way toward the cottage as Xena led Argo in the direction of the barn. Lila turned in the direction of Gabrielle and said," Gabrielle, why does Xena have that goofy grin on her face?" Xena nearly choked when her uncanny hearing picked up the words from her lover's sister, a slow blush creeping up her neck, she stopped in her tracks, and had to force herself to look in Gabrielle's direction. The bard's eyes met hers and mouthed the words 'I told you so' before she spoke to Lila. "It's a warrior thing..." Gabrielle walked to the house, smiling. * * *
"Now I know where Gabrielle gets her culinary talent." Xena smiled as Hecuba offered the warrior another pastry.
"That always was the one thing this girl could get right... food." Hecuba laughed. Gabrielle noticed that Xena was really turning on the charm tonight, but it hadn't taken the sting from her mother's last words. Yea, the only thing I
ever did right was learning to cook. "Well, the good thing is, now she's very talented... at a lot of things." Xena chimed in to save the day, earning a look so full of love from Gabrielle, it was hard for her mother not to miss it. Meanwhile Gabrielle's father, Herodotus, silently glared at the warrior. "Here, let me get those," Xena said, taking plates and bowls from Hecuba's hands, and proceeding to clear the rest of the table. "Xena you're a guest here... you don't have to do that." Hecuba said a little dumbfounded, the large warrior appearing out of place in her kitchen. "No problem... Gabrielle has me well trained," she said with a wink toward the bard who just happened to enter the kitchen at that moment. "Just don't ask her to cook... unless you actually like your food black," Gabrielle threw back. "Ooooh, that hurts," the warrior came right back. Hecuba stood watching the exchange and knew right then, this Gabrielle was no longer the little girl who left Potidaea to chase after the Warrior Princess. She was an equal partner, and it was quite evident to the older woman that Gabrielle had found a life that made her happy and somewhere along the way, just possibly, a warrior whose heart was completely devoted to the young bard. "Brie, why don't you go and visit with your mother... I can finish this." "You don't have to do it alone," Gabrielle returned.
Once Hecuba had walked into the other room for more dishes, Xena whispered to the bard, "Please, Brie... I'd much rather be in here, than sitting there having your father scowl at me all night." Gabrielle smiled sadly. "I'm sorry about this, Xe." "Don't be... just go and have a good visit with your mom." The warrior whispered, kissing her lover on the forehead. * * *
Xena cleaned the kitchen and spent most of the evening giving Argo some much-deserved attention, successfully avoiding Gabrielle's father. She sat in the barn mending a spot in the golden mare's halter that was pulling apart, thinking of Gabrielle and wondering if she should be by her side right now. No, she wouldn't blurt it out like that. Knowing Gabrielle, she'll want
to plan it out... step by step. That thought, of course, made her think of Gabrielle's careful seduction of the warrior in the Amazon village and she was caught up in her own fantasies. A woman's scream just outside the barn brought Xena to the here and now in a heartbeat. Sword drawn she nearly ran down Lila as she burst through the barn doors. Lila was having her own problems at the moment trying to fend off the advances of an amorous young boy. The youngster, just barely on the verge of manhood saw Xena burst through the barn doors, moonlight reflecting off her sword, and almost fainted in fright. By the time Gabrielle and her parents made it around the side of the cottage, Xena had the young man by his throat, his feet dangling into the air, unable to touch ground. "You pathetic little bastard," the warrior hissed.
"What's going on?" Gabrielle shouted to be heard over Lila's sobs. "M--M--Malachus tried to kiss me... a--and I wouldn't let him." Lila hiccuped. The young man was gasping for air and Xena looked as if she had no intention of letting him breathe again... ever. "Xena!" Gabrielle called to her lover. "Xe," she said again, softly, reaching up to gently grab the warrior's chin, turning her face in Gabrielle's direction. Xena's eyes turned toward her lovers in an icy blue stare. Immediately seeing Gabrielle, the warrior's brow furrowed and her ice blue gaze began to melt into the adoration Hecuba had seen displayed earlier. "He's just a boy, Xe... let him go." Gabrielle practically whispered. The muscles in Xena's arm relaxed and the boy slid to the ground clutching his throat, gasping for air. Xena bent down and roughly pushed the boy's head down between his knees as if he'd had the wind knocked out of him. "Slow, deep breaths... it'll go away in a minute." The warrior advised him. "Everything's fine, father... go back to bed." Gabrielle said, trying to restore a little peace to the night. Herodotus spat on the ground and muttered something about beating up innocent villagers before turning and walking back into the house. "Get on your feet," Gabrielle commanded the young man. "Malachus, do you know who I am?" "Yes... you're Lila's sister. You travel with the Warrior Princess." The boy's voice shook when he spoke. "That's right," Gabrielle answered. "She cares a great deal for me," she continued, looking back at her warrior with eyes that held only love. "She would do anything for me... therefore she'd do anything for my family. I
know how young men like to talk to their friends... I'd hate to think you would spread lies or gossip about Lila and the events of this evening to those friends of yours." "Oh, no, Miss," he stammered, his eyes darting back and forth between Xena and Gabrielle. "I don't want to have to come back here looking for you, Malachus..." Xena interjected with a feral smile. "Oh, no... never, never," the young man seemed sufficiently terrified now that the warrior knew his name. "Then maybe you should start by apologizing to Lila," Gabrielle took over. Malachus couldn't apologize fast enough, but kept stumbling over his words so badly it came out as a truly pathetic apology. "Lila... I--I never meant to hurt you... I mean, I never would... I only wanted to, I mean I never..." He kept looking back at Xena and Gabrielle, leaning closer towards Lila, lowering his voice until he could barely be heard. "I--I--I never kissed a girl before... and you're so pretty..." Xena and Gabrielle looked at each other and tried to hide their smiles at the young man who had almost gotten himself killed, simply for lack of experience. "Say goodnight, Malachus," Xena said putting her arm around the boy's shoulder. "We need to have a talk," she said to him, pulling him in the direction of the village. Hecuba had stood there, rooted in place, while the event transpired. There would be two things she would always remember about the episode that evening. The first was the sheer strength within the warrior. When they had come upon Xena, holding Malachus up by the throat, Hecuba noticed the muscles bulging in the warrior's arm, forearm and biceps flexing strongly around the bone. The second thing would be how much in love her
daughter was with the tall warrior. * * *
"Why don't you want to stay in your old room with me, Gab?" Lila said helping Gabrielle spread out blankets and a bedroll in the loft. "Because my place is with Xena," Gabrielle said softly. Xena had come back from a long talk with young Malachus and made her way into the barn and heard the two young women in the loft. She hadn't meant to spy, it was a natural ability of the warrior's to walk around without making a sound, and she hadn't meant to hide the fact she was in Argo's stall beneath her lover and her sister. Now, however, she heard the questions being asked and she couldn't stop herself from listening to the bard's replies. "Do you really think Xena would do anything for you?" Lila asked slightly in awe. "I know she would... she proves it every day." Gabrielle smiled. "I like my friends too, but I wouldn't do just anything for them." "Xena and I would because we love each other." "Do you love her the way you loved Perdicus?" Lila's eyes seemed to go wide at her sister's confession. Xena's heart nearly stopped at Lila's words and she had to remind herself to breathe. In the short time the two women had been lovers, she and Gabrielle hadn't talked about anyone they had been with previously. In hindsight Xena knew how she must have hurt the bard with her casual flings with men like Ulysses. Even if the two women had talked, Xena didn't know if she'd ever have the courage to bring up Gabrielle's marriage to
Perdicus. It still hurt too much, knowing that the one woman who captured her warrior's heart had left her to be loved by another. Does she know now
how she broke my heart? Gabrielle stopped what she was doing and motioned for her sister to sit down beside her. "Lila... I'm going to tell you something... something that I've never even told Xena. I'm telling you because I want you to understand some things about love... about making choices, and being with the right person. I don't want you to have to experience the same hurts that I did." Gabrielle's eyes filled with tears and her sister knelt down next to her and took her hand in her own. "I don't love Xena anything at all like I loved Perdicus." Gabrielle stated sadly. Xena felt sure her heart had stopped this time. All the pain she could have ever imagined was rolled into that one statement. To not have been the first was disheartening, but to always be second best in Gabrielle's heart felt like being kicked in the gut without warning. "I didn't love Perdicus the way you should love your mate, the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. I loved him because he was a boy I grew up with, because he reminded me of the good things about home... I loved him as a friend, not a lover." "Gabrielle, why did you marry him if you knew you felt that way?" Lila asked. Tears streamed down Gabrielle's face, but she knew she needed to get the whole story out, to experience the cathartic cleansing her guilty heart begged for. "I married him because he asked me to... because he said he loved me... because I never thought I'd be able to do better." She finished with a whisper. "I was so in love with Xena and I never thought she would ever
love me that way... so I settled for less than my heart's desire. Lila, when Perdicus made love to me on our wedding night all I could think about was Xena... how I wished it had been her. I had made my decision and I was going to have to live with it, but even if Perdicus and I would have lived a long life together, I would have never loved him as much, as deeply as I love Xena." The bard and Lila continued to sit by one another, holding hands, feeling the comfort of just being sisters. Gabrielle wiped tears from her face and continued. "It's taken me a long time to get past the guilt of Perdicus' death. I used to drive myself insane thinking if I'd been honest with everyone... Xena, Perdicus, even myself, that none of it ever would have happened... that young boy would still be alive. I ended up hurting a lot of people. I know I hurt Xena... we've never spoken of it, but, Lila, I plan on spending the rest of my life proving to Xena that I wanted it to be her... that I wanted her to be first. I don't want her to ever again doubt the depth of my love for her." Hot tears slid down the warrior's cheeks as she listened to her bard's confessions of regret and remorse. What burdens her young lover had decided to bear by herself. Never, my bard... I'll never doubt your love. * * *
"Hey did you two fall asleep up there or what?" Xena called into the loft. The warrior had left the barn some time ago to not only compose herself, but to allow her lover some additional time to talk with her sister. The two sisters climbed down the ladder, smiling at the warrior. Xena could only hope her eyes didn't give away the fact she'd been crying like Gabrielle's did. "Well, it's late..." Lila said hesitantly. She turned and kissed her sister goodnight. "Night, Gab." Vacillating in front of the intimidating warrior, Lila seemed to decide on a course of action, and reached up and quickly
placed a kiss on the warrior's cheek. "Night, Xena." When Lila reached the door she turned and looked at Xena again. "Thanks for what you did tonight, Xena." Still a little taken aback by the kiss, Xena wasn't sure how to respond to the young woman. "For scaring the Tartaurus out of your beau... sure anytime," she said wryly. Lila giggled and ran through the door, leaving the two lovers alone at last. "What was that all about?" Xena asked. Laughing Gabrielle put her arms around the warrior's waist. "I think you just became a hero to one more woman in this family." "Great," the warrior said with an air of mock disdain. "I'm barely able to keep up with the first one!" "Very funny," the bard smiled, squeezing her arms around the warrior tighter. "Would you mind if I did something I've been waiting all evening to do?" Xena asked. "Is it going to make me happy?" the bard questioned. "If it doesn't... I'm not doing it right." Xena cradled the bard's face in her hands and kissed her gently, the soft touch of her lips and tongue lingering on the bard's own for quite some time. "Wow," Gabrielle said breathlessly. Xena chuckled and embraced her lover. "The finest bard in Greece, and the best you can come up with is wow?"
"Well," Gabrielle said, backtracking sheepishly, "when you do that it kind of turns my brain to mush." "Yes, but did it make you happy?" The warrior grinned back. "Oh, yea," Gabrielle said, still trying to catch her breath. * * *
"Gabrielle..." Xena whispered. Both women lay wrapped around each other on their makeshift bed in the hay of the loft. Neither one of them near sleep, but it felt good to relax and be away from others eyes. The barn was still warm; the two lovers in cotton shifts needed no blankets. "Gabrielle, I know you probably don't want to... well, you know, being your parents are so close, but it's driving me crazy, you lying with me without being able to feel your skin on mine." There I said it and now she thinks
I'm an insatiable animal. Gabrielle smiled and kissed the warrior's shoulder she was cuddled up to, grabbing the hem of her sleeping shift she pulled the fabric off her body in one swift motion. Reaching across to her lover, she helped the warrior do the same. Snuggling against one another, Gabrielle had to admit to herself that this was much better. "I can't help it, Brie... you feel so good." Xena said stroking the bare skin of her lover's back and shoulders. "I like that you have a hard time resisting me, you know," the young woman whispered. "It takes every bit of restraint I have most days, my love." The warrior returned with a smile.
"Xena... I need to say something to you," Gabrielle's demeanor turning serious. "I don't want there to be any lies between us anymore... we've both suffered enough from that already. When Lila and I were up here getting our bedroll ready, well... I want you to know--" "Gabrielle, I want to be honest with you too..." Xena knew the lies Gabrielle referred to... Hope... Ming Tien... they had been to Tartaurus and back because of the lies and half-truths they had told one another. The warrior knew she had to start this relationship off right, even if it meant small hurts along the way. At least those they could meet and deal with together. "... Brie, when you were talking with Lila I was--" "No, Xe... me first, okay?" Gabrielle placed soft fingers across the warrior's lips. Xena nodded silently and Gabrielle continued. "When I was up here in the loft, telling those things to Lila... I knew you were in the stall beneath us." "But... how... the whole ... you knew I was there the whole time?" Xena could feel her face turning warm with shame. "That's what I was just going to tell you... I'm so sorry, I never meant to--" "I know... it's allright, Xe. I said those things partly because I wanted Lila to understand the consequences we face when we make choices." "Partly?" Xena asked. "Yes." Gabrielle said, tears in her eyes. "The other reason was because I wanted to let you know what was in my heart... why I did what I did... and how very sorry I am that I ever hurt you. I wasn't sure I had the courage to tell you face to face."
"Oh, Brie... I love you more every day," the warrior confessed, wiping unshed tears from her bard's eyes. "Please, please, my love... let's not ever be afraid to tell each other anything." "I'm sorry I hurt you..." Gabrielle apologized. "I need your forgiveness more than you need mine. If I'd told you how much I loved you a long time ago you would have never left to marry Perdicus. I would have been your first... he would still be alive. Dahok, Hope... all of it... Gabrielle, I'm responsible for so much of your pain." "Stop it, Xe," Gabrielle said more sharply than she had intended. She pulled Xena's face so she could look into the blue depths. "You're doing it again, my love. Taking the whole weight of the world on your own shoulders. You're not Atlas... you haven't been condemned to do that for eternity." Now it was Gabrielle's turn to brush the tears from her lover's face. "Oh, Xe... we've both made mistakes, but they're a part of our past. We didn't have each other then, the way we do now. We don't ever have to go through anything alone... we'll always have each other." "I still wish I had been your first," the warrior said a little sadly. "I want you to be something better, my love," Gabrielle whispered, leaning over the warrior and tenderly stroking her face, "I want you to be my last." Xena let the tears escape from her eyes as she wrapped her arms around her young lover and kissed her as if to impart the very secrets of her soul. * * *
"Gab, I'm going to help uncle Delos tonight serving dinner at the inn. Why don't you and Xena come into town and maybe you could tell some
stories?" Lila pleaded. The four women were enjoying a morning cup of tea; Gabrielle's father had left at sunrise to work in the fields, much to Xena's relief. "I don't know, Lila... uncle Delos may already have a bard, besides, Xena and I sit in taverns all the time, I'm sure she doesn't want to do it here too." "Oh, I bet Xena likes to hear your stories, don't you Xena?" Lila pestered. "Absolutely," the warrior said without hesitation. Gabrielle raised an eyebrow and gave Xena the 'thanks for helping' look. "I'd really just rather stay at home and visit with mother." "Well, actually, Gabrielle... I'm helping Delos too. There's a large caravan passing through and the whole town's been turned on its ear. They were supposed to arrive this morning." "Well, if the whole family's going... I guess that settles it, huh?" Xena said to Gabrielle, slapping her knees and smiling brightly. "Don't think I won't get even, warrior," Gabrielle whispered into her lover's ear. Xena simply rolled her eyes and whistled, as much the picture of innocence as a Warrior Princess can get. * * *
"What's all this?" Gabrielle asked, finding Xena in the barn among their saddlebags. The young woman's Amazon leathers had been unpacked, along with arm bracers, leather belt, and jewelry. "I thought maybe... well, you talked about wanting your family to know who
you are. I thought this might be a good place to start." "I don't know about this, Xe..." The warrior moved behind her bard and wrapped strong arms around the smaller frame. "You said you wanted them to know who you really are, Brie. How about not telling a story about just the Warrior Princess tonight and tell them something original... tell them a story about how a scared little farm girl became Queen of the Amazon Nation." "Do you think they're ready for that kind of story from me?" "Probably as ready as they'll ever be, my love." Xena whispered into her lover's ear. * * *
"Ep?" Gabrielle shouted in disbelief, giving her Amazon friend a strong hug. The caravan had indeed ridden in that day and the tavern was packed to the rafters. Little did Xena and Gabrielle know that it was a caravan of Amazons. "What in the world are you all doing here?" Gabrielle asked awe struck. There must have been twenty to twenty-five Amazon warriors along with the townspeople in her uncle's inn. "We were up delivering the crop excess to the village of Olynthus, about two days ago as we were heading back to Amazonia we lost the axle on one of the wagons. So, we sent word ahead and decided to visit Potidaea." "It's so nice to see a friendly face," Gabrielle said giving her friend another hug. Xena dusted her hands off after bringing in a few extra kegs of port for
Delos, Gabrielle's uncle. Looking around she searched the room for her bard and found her talking to Eponin. What in the world? The site of her young lover dressed in her Amazon leathers easily took Xena's breath away. A soft brown leather bodice that fit like the bard's own skin, and a wraparound skirt that the young woman had become accustomed to wearing. The leather belt hung loosely at her hips, more for decoration than any functional purpose. Gabrielle had even chosen to wear her arm bracers for the occasion. The warrior stared with pride as the young Queen had foregone her beaded necklaces in favor of the pendant Xena had given her. The warrior noticed that Gabrielle never took the necklace off, even to bathe, and she smiled with the knowledge that anyone who saw her armor would instantly recognize it in the pattern of the hearts on the pendant. Gods, I hope
everything goes well tonight... if not my surprise isn't going to get much of a response. As Gabrielle and Eponin were sharing a friendly embrace, the Amazon warrior glanced up to see Xena making her way through the crowd to join them. Eponin realized where her hands were at and quickly ripped them away from the young Queen's waist as if they were on fire. "Who say's you can't teach old warriors anything," Xena growled at her old friend's actions. "Xe," Gabrielle admonished with a smile. "What in Zeus' name brings you here?" Xena grabbed her friend by the neck of her tunic and leaned in towards the woman. "If you're following your Queen, she's already spoken for," she growled under her breath. "Very funny... are you trying to give me some sort of complex or do you just like throwing me from great heights?" The two warriors enjoyed some good-natured teasing and Eponin related the story of how they ended up in Potidaea.
"Lila," Gabrielle grabbed her sister's arm as she passed by on her way to the kitchen for more trays. Eponin, I'd like you to meet my sister, Lila." The young Queen said proudly. Lila's eyes went wide at the sight of the good looking warrior who gently took her offered hand and brushed her lips lightly across the backs of her fingers. "Good evening, Princess," Eponin said charmingly. "Me? A Princess?" Lila said, blushing furiously. "Well, your sister is our Queen. Right of birth grants you the title of Amazon Princess." Eponin explained. Suddenly Gabrielle noticed that Eponin still held Lila's hand in her own, and turned to give a 'do something' glance at her warrior. Xena picked up on what would be henceforth known as 'the look' immediately. In years to come when Xena would do something stupid... drink too much, or if Gabrielle felt her lover was flirting with another woman, any type of social faux pas, Xena would earn 'the look'. As with this very moment it meant, do something warrior... do something right now! Xena stood behind Eponin, nudging her armor into her back. "Lila is Gabrielle's much--younger sister," the warrior said, enunciating every syllable. Eponin dropped Lila's hand and backed away from the young woman like she had Swamp Fever. Lila seemed confused, but turned to look at her sister, "Gabrielle... am I really a Princess?" "Come on Princess," the girls uncle, Delos said grinning, pushing Lila back toward the kitchen. "Get back into the kitchen while your head can still fit through the door!"
"Gabrielle..." Delos had his hands full of plates and mugs, his burly frame towering over the smaller one of his niece. "I know you're family, and I shouldn't be imposing, but I'll pay you all the dinars you want, if you'll tame this crowd down with a few tales." "Sure," the bard said with a smile. "Just let me get a cup of water." "Well, duty calls," Gabrielle said cheerily. "I'm going to say hello to some more of our sisters before I go on," she finished nodding toward a large table next to a makeshift stage. "Grab me before you go on, okay?" Xena said. Gabrielle leaned in close to her lover and whispered, "I'm not even gonna touch that one... it was way too easy." She said with a leer. "Gab-ri-elle." Xena cautioned, feeling the beginnings of a blush. Gabrielle's laughter rang through the tavern as she moved toward the other Amazons. She had simply meant to say hello to a few of the warriors she knew personally, forgetting the Amazons love of ceremony and protocol. "Tarazon... it's so nice to see you again," the young Queen began. Nearly twenty Amazons jumped up from their seats, immediately recognizing their Queen, dropping to one knee before a frozen Gabrielle. "My Queen," the young Tarazon said flattered that the beautiful Queen even remembered her. Conversation dwindled and then stopped completely at the tables surrounding the kneeling Amazons. Lila was just stepping out of the kitchen with a tray of plates laden with food. "Whoa," said the young girl at the impressive display before her. "Guys... guys, you can get up now," Gabrielle said more than a little self-
consciously. * * *
Xena was still chuckling when Gabrielle made her way back to the warrior. "Having a little trouble over there, my Queen?" "Oh, hush," Gabrielle replied, slapping her lover's arm affectionately. Xena glanced around the tavern as if searching for something. Spying the door to the storeroom where she had stacked the caskets of port earlier, she grabbed Gabrielle's hand and led the young woman into the dark room. "This is for luck," the warrior's sultry voice whispered into her lover's ear. Xena kissed the young bard for all she was worth, until both women grew dizzy and just as the warrior slipped an arm around the bard's waist, Gabrielle's knees buckled. "Wow..." Gabrielle said breathlessly. Smiling at her young lover, Xena felt exactly the same. "You're going to have to come up with something better, you know." "I don't know... I thought that kinda said it all." Gabrielle replied, kissing her warrior's neck. "Well, if you're very good tonight I'll have a surprise for you." Xena said cryptically. "Oh? And, will this surprise make me happy?" Gabrielle teased. "Well, I am a woman of many skills."
"I know... I like all of those skills, too," Gabrielle shot back as she turned to leave the room. Xena quickly grabbed her young lover from behind and pressed her body into the bard's, her warm breath teasing Gabrielle's ear. In a voice overwhelmed with sudden hunger the warrior answered. "You haven't experienced half of my skills yet, my love." That was all it took and instantly the bones in Gabrielle's knees turned to warm liquid. If the warrior's arm had not been enfolded around her so tightly the young Queen was sure she would have fallen into a heap on the floor. * * *
Xena enjoyed the flush upon Gabrielle's face as she walked to the chair on the makeshift stage, especially since the warrior realized, she was responsible for the bard's slightly breathless condition. The warrior turned toward the bar to grab the mug of port Delos sat down in front of her and she started to place a coin on the bar in exchange. "Your money's no good here, Xena... your practically family." The large man said. "I don't want to take advantage," Xena said. Arching her eyebrow she continued, "besides, I can drink a lot of port in an evening," she finished with a smile. Delos laughed heartily. "Well, you carried it all in, you ought to be the one to drink it! Anyway... I think she's worth it." He said nodding his head in Gabrielle's direction. She turned back to watch Gabrielle settle into her chair and take a drink from her cup of water. Xena found herself liking her lover's uncle, this giant
of a man with such a gentle soul. "That she is," the warrior said under her breath, "that she is." * * *
Finding a seat in the back of the room where she could see her bard, Xena leaned against the wall and stretched her long legs out in front of her. Gabrielle started out slow telling a few short, but exciting tales to spark the interest of the patrons, then the bard moved in to the tales of war. Beware Greeks, a tale about the Trojan War was always a favorite and Gabrielle told it well. A Good Day, related the events of Xena and Gabrielle's attempt to trick Caesar and Pompey's forces into fighting each other, wiping out nearly 20 legions of Roman soldiers. Xena was stabbed with guilt about that day. Her hatred of Caesar had again forced her to put Gabrielle into a situation where the bard had to choose between Xena and her own personal code of ethics. Even now, Xena remembered Gabrielle's sobs as the warrior held the young woman in the middle of a battlefield filled with the dead and the dying. As always, Gabrielle's tales of war were not romanticized as other bards were. She concentrated on the futility of war. There may be honor in dying for what one believes in on the battlefield, but what of the wives and children left behind... what of them? This is what her bard saw in war. A hopeless arena of destruction where the dead only know one thing... that it was better to be alive. Being the great bard that she was Gabrielle always knew how to gauge an audience's reaction, and she knew her stories of war, filled with sadness, could dampen the listener's spirits. With only a few moments pause, she began a lighter tale of her own she titled, Altared States. Xena watched as a few of the patrons wiped tears from their eyes after her bard's tales of the consequences of war. Even if the warrior had not lived
the story, Gabrielle's way with words would have had her too, held in the powerful web she wove. She smiled to herself as her bard began the story of how Xena had intervened to stop the sacrifice of a young boy by his father's misguided hand. Xena's smile grew as the bard launched into the details of the Warrior Princess' companion, and how said companion had become drugged by Henbane, and decided the rocks could 'talk' to her. Gabrielle never mentioned during her stories that she was the companion to the great Warrior Princess. She often told tales of the companion's rescue by her warrior friend, but never revealed the fact that it was Gabrielle herself who had assisted and saved the warrior countless times. Instead the bard let the light of her story reflect on a reformed Warlord, the former Destroyer of Nations who left an evil past behind and now traveled throughout the land on a quest for the redemption of her own soul. So, Xena closed her eyes and let the bard's words wash over her. It was her lover's voice that held the warrior, enraptured, at her stories. Xena remembered, as the bard said the words aloud from the stage, the cave where the young woman had finally stolen the warrior's heart.
"By the Gods! You--are-- beautiful!" Xena chuckled at the memory as most of the audience did at the stoned little companion who could barely stand, but once she had both eyes open, bared her heart. Little did the listener's realize that those words had been locked tightly into Gabrielle's heart, for what seemed like an eternity to the young woman, until the drug removed her inhibitions. The young Queen spied her lover in the back of the tavern, the warrior's eyes closed, but laughing at the revisited memory of the 'Henbane Incident'. Gabrielle knew right then that her life with Xena had changed. The proud warrior usually left the building when tales of the Warrior Princess began, or she sat, sipping her port, scowling at the fact she had become the center of attention. The warrior's eyes snapped open as she uncannily felt the heat of her lover's stare. Gabrielle nearly gasped at the cerulean desire emanating
from the raven-haired beauty's eyes. Almost losing her place in her story, Gabrielle continued on, but her face began to blush a deep pink. Again the warrior smiled, closing her eyes and enjoying the reaction she brought to her lover with one look. Suddenly remembering the way she too had felt at Gabrielle's declaration of her beauty. She knew now that she had been in love with her friend, even then. Of course, she always told herself it was friendship, but hadn't she known better... even back then?
Gods, I remember how she felt wrapped around me in that well. Hadn't I told myself back then, it was just because I hadn't shared the pleasures of a lover's bed in so long that I reacted so strongly? Xena allowed herself to revel in the feelings of that past incident and suddenly the bard's voice became very distant, and the room became a trifle warm. A slow trickle of wetness could be felt between her legs, and the warrior's eyes popped open. Oh, Gaia... I need some air! She said to herself as she quickly slid out the door into the cool evening air. * * *
Gabrielle found her warrior outside, in the dark at the back of the tavern. She sat back in the shadows on a large tree stump used for chopping logs. "Looks like I'm not the only one taking a break... what are you up to?" Gabrielle asked. "Just thinking..." the warrior drawled. "And from the look on your face I can guess what you've been thinking about," Gabrielle returned teasingly. Xena looked up with a seductive smile. "The well..."
"Ahhh, yea that part had me wishing we weren't in a public place too," Gabrielle whispered as she straddled the warrior's lap and sat down on the muscled thighs. Xena quickly pulled the bard closer to her, glancing around nervously. "It's allright, love... no one ever comes back here at night." Gabrielle whispered using her tongue to very quickly ignite a flame in the warrior's already smoldering passion. Two days had gone by since they last made love and that was a current record since they'd become lovers. In the state they were in their kisses alone could have sent either woman, very quickly, over the edge. Gabrielle, however, was feeling rather playful with her warrior. Slipping one hand between them, she moved her hand under the warrior's leather battle skirt, easily working her way into the already soaked leather breeches. A breathless moan escaped Xena's throat, followed by a whimper of protest as the bard removed her fingers, bringing them up to her mouth. "Is all this wet for me?" she asked enticingly, running her tongue over each digit and drawing them into her mouth, reveling in the taste and sweet, musky odor of her lover. "Oh, gods... Gabrielle," Xena breathed, unable to take her eyes from the bard's own. The bard slipped her fingers back into Xena's wetness and quickly drove them deep inside the warrior. She was instantly rewarded with groans of delight and the feel of her lover's hips thrusting against the palm of her hand. Xena willed her body to hold out longer, but her earlier fantasies and the bard's touch made her body all too willing to succumb to a breath-stealing climax. The warrior growled her release into her lover's ear, bringing a few control techniques into play to silence her passions, when all she really wanted to do was scream Gabrielle's name into the night.
"Gods, woman... please, don't start that again," the warrior begged as Gabrielle began to lick her lover's wetness from her hand. "You know... I'll pay you back... for this later... don't you?" Xena said, trying to bring her breathing under control. "I'm counting on it warrior." The young bard whispered into the warrior's ear. * * *
The two lovers had walked around to the front of the tavern, standing in the shadows, holding hands. "So, have you decided what story comes next?" The warrior asked. "I'm going to take your suggestion... the Amazon Queen." "Figured out what you're going to say yet?" "I guess I'll just wing it... I'm nervous though. I never thought it would feel so different telling a story in front of people who grew up with me as opposed to complete strangers." Xena took a cursory glance around and pulled the smaller woman into a loving embrace. "You will be wonderful, and you will tell a wonderful story, and all the people will love you as much as I do... well, maybe not quite that much, but enough." Gabrielle laughed and kissed her lover's lips tenderly, enjoying the soft embrace. "Just be prepared to make a hasty departure if they turn on me." She finished with a grin. Xena laughed and gently slapped the bard's retreating backside as they headed back toward the tavern. "You go on... I need a few minutes to... um,
compose myself after..." the warrior smiled motioning toward the back of the tavern. "I'll be in before you start." Gabrielle squeezed her lover's hand and walked into the tavern. "Xena," a voice said from the darkness. The warrior froze at the sound of the familiar voice, cursing herself for not realizing there might have been someone else outside. Hera's tits... how much of that did she hear? "Hecuba," the warrior said walking in the direction of the bench where Gabrielle's mother sat. "It got so warm in that kitchen I had to cool off... looks like you need to do the same," the older woman said. Xena's hand went up to her flushed cheek and she thought she was able to see a wry smile on Hecuba's face. Oh, sweet Aphrodite... Please, tell me
she didn't see us out back! "Would you answer me one question, warrior?" Hecuba asked softly. "If I can." "Do you love my daughter?" The woman's voice was barely a whisper now. "Hecuba, maybe you'd better wait and talk with Gabrielle--" "I know what her answer will be... I want to know what yours is. Do you love her?" "With all that I am," the warrior said without further hesitation. Hecuba smiled, "So, why in Tartaurus have you both been trying so hard to hide it?" Both woman laughed as Hecuba motioned the warrior to the seat next to her. "You've been good for her. I know you won't hear many people say that, but I see it... saw it right off. She's not a little girl anymore. Most
importantly she's something she would never have been if she had stayed in Potidaea... she's happy." Hecuba reached across and squeezed the warrior's large hand, Xena placing her other hand over Hecuba's. The older woman saw a sight that few others, besides Gabrielle, were able to witness... the gentle side of the Warrior Princess. "Would you do anything for her?" Hecuba asked. "I'd die for her." The warrior said resolutely. "Dying is easy, warrior... would you live for her?" "I'm sorry?" Xena said, not understanding the woman's meaning. "If you had to make a choice... a hard choice. Would you leave her if you thought it was best for her?" Xena could barely see Hecuba's face in the darkness, but could feel her penetrating stare. Searching her own mind for the truth, she answered. "I think, if there was no other way... if it would save Gabrielle's life... or if it would keep her from harm..." a sharp stab of pain clutched at Xena's heart as she said the words. "Yes... I think if it would keep her safe... I would leave her." "Don't! Don't ever do it!" Hecuba said vehemently, squeezing the warrior's hand tightly. "You're thinking only with the love you have for Gabrielle. Love is an emotion, Xena, and it can fool you. I know from past experience," she whispered, as her eyes took on a faraway look of someone reliving a memory. "Love can be used against you, to trick you into giving up everything you hold dear. You will only end up hurting yourself, the one you love, and even others around you," she said softly. "Always look into your heart for the truth, Xena. Your heart will never lie to you... if there comes a day, remember not to rely on your emotions. Look
into your soul and you'll find the truth there." Hecuba finished. "You sound like a woman who's been there, and then some." Xena replied. "Hecuba... does what you're saying have anything to do with Gabrielle's past?" The older woman smiled sadly and muttered to herself, "I'll need to tell her someday... but, now is not the time." * * *
"I'd like to tell you a story of a young girl who left her home, family, and everything that was safe, to travel the world with a dark fearsome warrior..." The bard began. Xena listened to the story as Gabrielle's mother sat beside her in the back of the tavern. The bard never mentioned the fact that she was the young girl in the story, nor that the Dark Warrior was Xena, the Warrior Princess. She hadn't even mentioned the Dark Warrior was a woman. The only physical descriptions she gave were of a tall, Dark Warrior with intense eyes and a smile, that when the warrior wanted to use it, could charm Medusa. Gabrielle said the story started out as a tale about only one. She told first of the young girl's quest. Simply to be free of a life that she was never destined for, people she was not destined to share her life with, a husband she was not destined to spend a lifetime with. The young girl was smart and creative, but always thought of herself as different and impulsive. And, when other girls were announcing their betrothals, she felt unequal and plain. When the girl first followed the warrior is was simply as a means of escape from the stifling life of her village. Soon, she found a friend in the uncommunicative warrior, although she admitted that at first, the thought of friendship was probably more on her part than the warrior's. Soon,
however, the girl began to feel a part of the warrior's life, until the warrior deemed to call this beautiful and open heart, sister and friend. This was the young girl's story and Gabrielle told of how she had been captured as a bride for the God Morpheus, freed the Titans, only to have to help recapture them again. How she met a tribe of Amazons and, after nearly giving her own life in an unsuccessful attempt to save the Amazon Princess, Terreis, became an Amazon Princess herself. And even though it was the young girl's story, the dark warrior was always there. In times of crisis, the warrior fought... in times of need, the warrior provided. Time and again the dark warrior sacrificed for and rescued the young girl. And, finally, the story became not of a girl turned Amazon Princess, but of an Amazon Princess and a Dark Warrior, not a story of one, but of two. Their life threads so tightly entwined that neither the Gods on Olympus nor mortals on earth had the strength to separate them. The two became as family and even though enemies tried to pull them apart, and they had each succumbed to death to protect the other, it was always the strength of that friendship that returned them from the spirit world to this mortal coil. Somewhere along this journey, that started with one and now belonged to two, the Amazon Princess became a beloved Queen of the Amazon Nation. The Dark Warrior, who had been feared because of past misdeeds, became a champion for the greater good. The two became inseparable, until even the listeners of the bard's story knew; it was because their friendship was becoming something more. And, when dalliances and impulses led their hearts astray, it was always the Fates wish that the two should be rejoined, and so their lives would be thrust together once more. They experienced life, love, death... and finally betrayal and hate. They inflicted pain upon one another in the ignorance of being blinded by their own hurt. And then, there was the healing.
Yet, throughout all of the anguish, came the promise... even in death... I will never leave you. Xena felt tears slip from her eyes at the memory of that promise. After all the pain and sadness their lies had caused them; The death of her son, Gabrielle taking the life of her own daughter, and then the warrior trying to kill Gabrielle. Xena replayed it in her mind as if watching someone else drag her beloved bard's body along to certain death. After all the healing
our time in Illusia had provided, Brie, what else was left to say? I still couldn't find the courage to tell you I loved you... and so, the promise... "... Even in death, Gabrielle... I will never leave you." Xena listened as her bard continued on, to tell of the brutal rape of the Amazon Queen, and of the suffering she and her Dark Warrior went through. Gods, she's telling it all! Gabrielle paused to sip from her cup of water and looked out at the rapt faces of her audience. Tears glistened in most of their eyes, and when she looked back at her warrior, she saw the uncharacteristic tears falling from her eyes too. She also noticed that her mother sat next to her lover, but the older woman's eyes remained cast down to the floor. The bard continued her story, but it began to sound uplifting and inspiring the way her Dark Warrior fought so bravely, within their dreamscape, for the Amazon Queen. She told of the friendship that had, as guessed by the listeners, grown into love for the two, only neither would confess, fearing the other's reaction. Then one day, unable to hold back any longer, the two professed their love for one another, committing not only their bodies and their hearts, but also their very souls to each other for all eternity. And in doing so, finally the story became, not of two, but of one again. Gabrielle finished her story to a thunderous round of applause, a number of Amazons drawing swords to pound upon the table in rousing approval of her tale. The bard smiled and accepted thanks, refusing any dinars for the evening's performance. As she left the stage, the tables full of Amazon
Warriors stood and placed their hands over their hearts in silent tribute to the Queen they had come to love so well. This time the young Queen was neither flustered nor embarrassed. She walked past the Amazons as proudly and regally as Queen Melosa had ever done, nodding her thanks to the noble warriors. If any of the inn's patrons that night wondered if their own Gabrielle was the Amazon Queen in the story, the warrior's display settled it for most of them. And, if there were any doubters still left, all they had to witness was the Queen walking through a crowd that parted without a word for her. When she reached the back of the tavern a tall dark warrior stood, her eyes as blue as the Aegean, and a smile, this night being reserved for her Amazon Queen, that could surely charm Medusa. * * *
If Xena had been anywhere else on earth she would have pulled her lover into the world's tightest embrace and kissed her until neither one of them could breathe. Since she was standing next to Gabrielle's mother, however, she was at a loss. Gaia, she is wonderful! Gabrielle, what you do to me. Not knowing what she should do she simply stood and offered a smile that had only ever been meant for her bard. Gabrielle was simply flying too high to give in to the restraints of propriety, or small town ideologies tonight. She slipped one arm around Xena's waist and the other around her neck. Standing on her toes, she kissed an absolutely stunned warrior. Xena stood there with her eyes still open watching the amused smiles of the patrons around them and seeing Eponin out of the corner of her eye, her jaw nearly dropping to the floor. Of course, the moment her brain was able to register Gabrielle's soft mouth on hers, her eyes closed and her lips became eager participants in the kiss.
"Ahem..." The two lovers pulled, very unwillingly, out of their kiss only to see Hecuba staring at them in an amused fashion. "Gabrielle..." Hecuba said "Yes, mother," Gabrielle answered, her arm still around the warrior's waist. "Do I at least get a hug?" Gabrielle smiled and moved to wrap her arms around her mother. "I never knew," Hecuba said, tears forming in her eyes. "Knew what, mother?" The young Queen asked. "Knew you," Hecuba replied in quiet admiration. Gabrielle smiled and started crying at the same time. She wrapped her arms tighter around the older woman, grateful for her understanding. Xena stood there for a moment and watched mother and daughter. The mother who held the secrets to her daughter's past and a daughter whose only wish was for a mother's unconditional love. The warrior decided to make herself scarce and joined her Amazon friends, leaving mother and daughter to begin to form a bridge. * * *
"Gabrielle?" The Queen turned to her sister's voice. She and Xena were just sneaking through the tavern doors for some much-needed time alone.
"What is it, sister?" Gabrielle replied in the way she always had when the two girls were much younger. It was obvious Lila had been crying, but most everyone had that night. "I just wanted to say... you're stories were... um, your story... well, wow." Gabrielle felt genuine laughter bubble to the surface and hugged her sister tightly. "Thanks, Lila... I think." "That wow stuff must run in the family," Xena whispered in the bard's ear. Gabrielle looked into the warrior's smiling eyes and gave her a playful smack on the arm. "Lila, tell your mother not to worry... Gabrielle and I won't be coming back to the house tonight. We'll be back in the morning." Xena said earning a strange look from both women. "Where are you guys going?" Lila asked. "Yea, where are we going?" Gabrielle chimed in. "To sleep under the stars," Xena said as the Queen took her warrior's offered hand and they left the tavern. * * *
Xena slid into Argo's saddle effortlessly, offering her hand to pull Gabrielle up. "Up front, okay?" the warrior indicated the spot in front of her. "I'd like to wrap my arms around you while we ride for a change," the warrior said as she settled her lover comfortably in her embrace.
They had been riding for nearly a full candlemark when Xena felt Gabrielle's sleeping form stir. The warrior had wanted to get to the campsite she had set up earlier, before the moon rose, but Gabrielle deserved the sleep after the night she had just had. And, the one I'm going to give her, the warrior thought to herself with a grin. So, she eased Argo into a gradual, even walk and they made their way slowly into the hills. Xena found herself humming absently, a love song that meant nothing to her when she first heard it, but now the melody struck a familiar chord in her heart. "Mmmm, I heard music," Gabrielle said drowsily. "Yes, you did." Was all Xena would say. "Was that you?" Gabrielle asked, suddenly very awake. "You've heard me sing before, Brie." "Only when you were very sad," Gabrielle said softly as she thought of the funeral pyres that she and her lover had stood in front of, while Xena would sing a Greek Burial lament. "Or when I am very happy," Xena whispered. "And are you very happy?" "My love, I am ecstatic." The warrior said as she continued to hum. "Are there words to that?" Gabrielle asked. "I'm not sure I remember all of them... would you like to hear what I do know?" The warrior asked, unable to deny her bard anything. "Yes, please," the bard replied. Gabrielle settled herself back against the warrior's chest and closed her eyes, listening to the rich tones of her lover's voice as she began to sing.
I can't imagine, any greater fear Than waking up, without you here. Though the sun, would still shine on My whole world, would all be gone... but not for long If I had to run... if I had to crawl If I had to swim a hundred rivers... just to climb a thousand walls Always know that I would find a way, to get to where you are There's no place that far. It doesn't matter, why we're apart Lonely miles, or two stubborn hearts Nothing short, of the Gods above Could keep me away, from your love... I need you that much If I had to run... if I had to crawl If I had to swim a hundred rivers... just to climb a thousand walls Always know that I would find a way, to get to where you are There's no place that far... Baby, there's no place that far.
"That's so beautiful, Xe," Gabrielle said breathlessly. "I didn't write it, but it's the way I feel." The warrior replied, kissing her lovers neck. "We're here, Brie." She said, holding tighter to the bard as Argo jumped up a steep embankment, disappearing into a copse of trees. "This is your surprise. Well, part of it at least." The perfect camp had already been prepared. Wood was stacked ready for the flame; their bedroll lay on a thick cushion of 2 extra blankets. A waterskin and a wineskin each hung from a low branch of a tree, and a
large hamper, from which arose some very tempting aromas, sat by the fire. "Xe, this is wonderful... I love it." Gabrielle exclaimed. Xena pulled the saddle and their bags from Argo and freed the mare to wander the area, knowing the horse was better than any guard was. Gabrielle found her way to the edge of the small lake and rinsed her face off. "Xe," she called over her shoulder, "This water is so warm... like bath water." "Yea, I found out the same thing when I was up here this afternoon. Must be fed by a warm spring somewhere underground." The warrior answered, rummaging through the saddlebags for her flint. "I could use a good warm bath... want to join me?" "Definitely," Gabrielle smiled thinking of the possibilities. "Just let me get a good fire going. The water may be warm but the air will be plenty cool when we get out." The warrior replied. Gabrielle had already begun removing her clothes, but still had not felt the warrior behind her move. She turned just as she was tying her hair back with a soft strip of leather. Xena had simply been staring at her young lover, unable to resume her previous task, actually, unable to resume any motion at all. If she had thought the site of Gabrielle's naked body was a wondrous thing from the back, she was unprepared for the site of the woman as she turned, her arms held up as she tied her hair back from her face. The bard's lips were moving, but Xena was lost to the sound. Gabrielle offered her a look that was so teasingly erotic it slammed into her like an energy bolt, waking up nerve endings that the warrior never even knew were there. "I said, do you want me to start that fire?" Gabrielle asked, taken back by her lover's electric blue eyes, slowly devouring her body.
Xena came back to the here and now as her bard's voice finally broke through the fantasy she was conjuring up in her mind. Quickly realizing she held a piece of flint and her dagger in her hand for a reason. "Xena? Do you want me to start a fire?" Gabrielle repeated. Xena smiled rather sheepishly, knowing her face must be showing the flush of desire, and turned to get a spark going into the tinder. "You already have, my love... you already have." The warrior replied hungrily. Gabrielle chuckled, "Then hurry up or I'll have to start without you." She said with a suggestive smile and splashed off into the warm water. A visual of the bard's threat assaulted the warrior's senses and all that could be heard was the click, click, click of flint frantically striking steel, while a warrior desperately prayed for a lightning bolt from the sky.
PART II
"DO YOU KNOW that monster even growls when you're asleep?" Xena told the bard. The two lovers lay wrapped in the soft large towels the warrior had talked Hecuba out of. Xena jumped up to open the food hamper as soon as she heard Gabrielle's stomach growl, chastising her lover for not eating dinner. "I was just too nervous to eat... I know that sounds weird, but it does happen." She said. "Wow, where in the world did you get all this food?"
"And who did you talk into making these for you?" Gabrielle asked, holding open the cloth that held the round pastries, with the red fruit center that her warrior loved so much. "I helped your mother." Xena said, never meeting the bard's gaze. "You, helped make them?" the bards asked suspiciously. "Well, I bought all the ingredients... that should count as helping." Xena said, grabbing one of the pastries and popping it in her mouth. "And, she makes them almost as good as you. Not quite, but almost." She finished, which earned her a kiss from her bard. After the two women had eaten their fill and Xena had added a few more logs to the fire, they removed their towels, lying naked in one another's arms, letting the warmth of the fire keep the cool evening at bay. "This is wonderful, Xe... all of it. Thank you so much, love." Gabrielle whispered. "You're welcome, but this is only part of your surprise." The warrior said in a sultry voice dripping with desire. Xena pulled Gabrielle to her, pressing her breasts into the smooth, muscled flesh of the bard's back. She could feel her nipples slide against her lover's skin, the small areas of flesh tightening in arousal. Grasping the young woman's hips, the warrior ground her mound into the bard's firm backside, eliciting a moan from deep in her lover's throat. "Didn't I tell you I would pay you back?" The warrior whispered, slightly breathless, into the bard's ear, remembering the way her bard had taken her earlier. Xena pulled the young woman to her even tighter and began to explore the front of the bard's body with strong, possessive hands. "Is this what you want, my Queen... to be taken by your warrior?"
"Oh, Gods... yes!" Gabrielle exclaimed "Tell me, my Queen... how would you like to be taken? Hard and fast... will you come for me with my hand pumping inside you?" Xena pushed her hand into the honey colored curls and swirled her fingers into her lover's wetness, as Gabrielle groaned and thrust her hips back into the warrior. "Or, would you like it slow and torturous, my tongue just teasing you until you beg me for release?" Xena thrust her hips back at the young woman, her own wetness causing a slick friction between her center and the bard's cheeks. "Ohhh," Gabrielle groaned helplessly. "Speechless?" The warrior asked. "Well, then let me tell you what I'm going to do to you, my Queen. I'm going to take you over and over until I've had my fill... as I like and how I please," she forcefully pulled the bard's body harder into hers, "Then I'll take you until you scream my name again and again." "By the Gods," Gabrielle's whole body shivered in delight as the warrior continued to paint a visual image of what the coming night would bring. As Xena began to carry out her promises, the young Queen's last coherent thought was that the 'getting even' part of their relationship was fast becoming a winner. * * *
"I'll never forget this place," Gabrielle said, looking back at the campsite she and the warrior were leaving in the distance as they rode atop the golden mare.
"We'll have to stop by and visit every time we come through here," Xena smiled, feeling the warm embrace of Gabrielle's arms around her waist. "Thank you, Xe... for everything," she added, raising an eyebrow suggestively. "I think I should be the one that's thanking you... besides, I'm not the one who's walking funny this morning." She finished a smug smile of satisfaction on her face. "Yes, but every bit of soreness was absolutely worth it!" she replied passionately, kissing the warrior's neck. Xena closed her eyes momentarily reliving the evening's passions. In her most erotic fantasies she never even dreamed Gabrielle would be this kind of lover; so responsive and so willing to try any new type of sensual pleasure. There wasn't a fantasy that Xena had locked in her mind that her bard wasn't willing to make a reality, and not just to please her warrior. Xena though that perhaps the most exciting thing about this beautiful lover of hers was the fact that, deep down, the young Queen's sexual fantasies and appetites, rivaled those of the Warrior Princess. They rode for a little more than a candlemark before arriving back at Gabrielle's parent's home. Lila was standing outside the barn, tears streaking her face, tightly hugging some small bags and Gabrielle's scroll case to her body. Both women quickly dismounted and ran to the terrified young girl. "I got all of your stuff before he could get to it," she sobbed. "He who... father?" Gabrielle asked. "Yes," she replied shakily. "Gabrielle, he wanted to burn your scrolls!" "That's right, I was gonna burn them," Herodotus sneered, coming from the barn.
"I didn't think our leaving the inn early last night would cause problems, father," Gabrielle said calmly. "It did more than cause problems... it caused talk! Every drunk in the tavern last night had something to say about you and that, that... harlot there!" Gabrielle's eyes turned to green fire and she moved toward her father. Xena grabbed the young woman by the shoulders to prevent her from moving any closer. Later that evening the warrior would be able to see bruises on the bard's shoulders where her fingers had gripped so tightly to the young woman simply to prevent her from flinging herself at the man. "It's not worth it, Brie," Xena whispered in her ear. Once she heard the soothing tones of her lover's voice, Gabrielle's temper began to cool. "We'll leave right away," she said to the retreating figure of her father. Xena began packing their belongings onto Argo, at the same time removing the items she borrowed from Hecuba the previous day. Gabrielle hugged Lila and spoke in quiet, hushed tones to calm the frightened girl. "Lila, I don't want you to be frightened. As usual, father's mad at me, not you. But, if you ever need to leave here... if you're ever too scared to stay you can always go to the Amazons, they'll protect you. All you have to do is get to the border of Amazon land and ask for Eponin, remember you met her? Ephiny is the Regent, who rules while I'm away. If anything ever happens..." Gabrielle didn't want to frighten her sister with what she thought might happen, but what if their father turned on Lila the way her had with her? The young girl needed a way to find her sister. "... If anything ever happens, find Ephiny or Eponin and they'll know how to find us, allright?" Gabrielle finished. Lila nodded her head, not really sure what the circumstance might be where she would have to run away and find the Amazons, but she knew she wasn't nearly as brave as her sister, and would be scared to death to run away from home.
Just then Hecuba came through the door to the cottage, carrying a bundle wrapped in cloth. "I'm sorry, Gabrielle... you know how he is," the older woman said sadly, not mentioning Herodotus' name. "It's allright mother. I never meant to embarrass you--" "No, don't ever think that way," her mother tenderly touched her daughter's cheek. "You've done nothing to hang your head in shame over. The men your father talked about were two drunks that Delos had to throw out of the tavern last night." Hecuba reached down and grasped the young woman's shoulders, "Everyone who heard your story last night is so proud of you... proud of what you've become... especially me." "Why has he always hated me?" Gabrielle finally spoke the words aloud that had plagued her for seasons. "It's not you, child... it's who he sees when he looks at you. Forgive me, Gabrielle, but I can't tell you more than that... I would if I could." "I don't understand why you're being so cryptic, mother, will there ever be a time when you can tell me what you're talking about?" Gabrielle asked "Yes... I'll figure out a way." The older woman said gently, kissing her daughter's forehead. Gabrielle acquiesced to her mother's wishes, albeit a little unwillingly. "Take care of your warrior, you'll never find another one like her." Hecuba said as Xena came to stand behind the bard. "And, Xena... take care of this little one. She'll get on your last nerve, that's to be sure..." Xena chuckled and Gabrielle began to blush at the statement. "... It'll be good practice for you when you have children of your own." Gabrielle would have loved to capture the look on Xena's face. The
warrior's eyes went wide and she got a look that was a cross between panic and amusement on her face. Hecuba's remarks lightened the mood as she tearfully watched her daughter and her companion mount Argo and ride away. "If you do nothing else... protect her," Hecuba mumbled aloud as she walked toward the cottage. * * *
"Ready to stop for the night?" Xena asked the young woman walking alongside her. She had worried at first when Gabrielle had said she wanted to walk. Her young lover's uncharacteristic silence always tended to worry the warrior, but this time she knew Gabrielle was trying to process all that had happened this morning, along with her mother's cryptic message. So, she rode the mare at a gentle pace and Gabrielle strode alongside at her own natural pace. Gabrielle knew she troubled Xena when she was quiet, but her warrior did seem to be taking it in stride today. The dark warrior appeared a little worried, so occasionally the bard reached over to lay a hand on the warrior's knee, or to smile up at her, just to let her know she appreciated the space she was being given. When Xena asked if she was ready to call it a day, her feet told her, 'for Gaia's sakes, yes!' It had been more than a few moons since they had traveled like this and the bard thought her body just needed a little time to get into shape again. Her back ached and she wished she were back at the warm spring fed lake in Potidaea. "I'm more than ready." Xena noticed Gabrielle stretch and massage her lower back, realizing with
that action what the new scent to Gabrielle was. She smiled because the bard probably didn't know it herself yet. Aside from everything that happened this morning, that too probably attributed to the bard's unusual quiet. Xena dismounted and led them up into the forest. She felt the cool dampness of a stream nearby and followed her instincts until they were at the inlet portion of a wide stream, the water pooling into a small pond surrounded by rocks and forest. Gabrielle went to relieve herself and found blood on her inner thighs. "Great! Just what I need... guess that explains the cramps and a backache." By the time the bard got back Xena had already collected firewood and had very nearly completed setting up camp. From the corner of her eye the warrior watched as Gabrielle rummaged through her bag for a cloth and the small leather belt the bard wore in place of her undergarment this time of the moon. "I need a bath," the bard said, not inviting the warrior to join her. Xena didn't take it personally and smiled affectionately at her lover. She felt a certain compassion for the young woman whose cycle was much worse than the warrior had ever experienced. "I'll go hunt up some dinner... take your time, love" Xena said gently. * * *
Gabrielle lay on her stomach on top of a large flat rock, enjoying the feel of the late afternoon sun on her back. She wore only the thin leather belt and the protective cloth, her clothes and staff lying on the rocks next to her.
Her mother's word kept rolling through her mind. It's not you, child... it's
who he sees when he looks at you. Who else could he see but me? Just then a small feeling wormed its way into her brain. Was it real, or had she simply imagined this memory?
"I swear, Hecuba, I'm going to break his neck someday!" "Delos, keep your voice down, the girls are taking a nap." "He has two daughters and he, by Gods, better start acting like it! He's treating little Gabrielle like I wouldn't treat my dog." "I know, brother... I don't know what more he wants ... I'm with him aren't I?" The flash of memory ended as abruptly as it had begun and Gabrielle thought she must have fallen asleep. A dream... that's all it was. She realized it must be getting late and Xena would get worried about her so, she quickly dressed and walked the short distance back to their campsite, the odd memory tugging at her psyche. Upon entering the clearing Gabrielle found Xena throwing small chunks of rabbit into a cooking pot along with a few wild vegetables, a small fire had already been started and water boiled in a kettle they used to make tea. "I guess I was gone for a while... I'm sorry, Xe." "Don't worry," the warrior smiled, "I checked on you a couple of times and you seemed like you were kind of out of it, so I started without you." She finished with a charming smile that so completely disarmed the young bard; she found her sour mood dissipating. Okay, why is she being so extraordinarily nice? Gabrielle wondered to herself. "Okay, Brie... you're on. I put it all in a pot just like you showed me... now do what you do, that I never seem to be able to do, that actually makes it
edible." The warrior said wryly. Gabrielle laughed and started to sprinkle an assortment of herbs into the stew, setting it on some rocks over the fire. The aroma that rose from the pot was testament to the warrior's words. Standing and turning back to her lover, Gabrielle was offered a steaming mug of tea that smelled of mint and raspberries. "How did you know?" She asked, the telltale sign being the tea her lover always made for her during bad cycles. "I know you," Xena replied pulling the young woman over to the bedroll she had made up. Argo's saddle had been placed against a fallen log, a couple of extra blankets placed over it as a cushion. She had draped their bedroll over that so Gabrielle would have a cushion to lean her back against. Xena settled the young woman onto the bedroll, allowing the bard to sip her tea. The warrior rose and quickly crossed to the fire, pouring hot water from the kettle into an empty water skin. Checking to make sure it didn't feel too hot; she brought the object over to the bedroll, and let the bard curl around its warmth. She began rubbing the young woman's back in small circular motions letting the bard lean against her as she did. "That does feel good... and this tastes good, thank you, Xe." She finished indicating the warm mug of tea. "There's something in there to help your back and the cramps." The warrior replied. "But, it'll make me sleepy, won't it?" Gabrielle asked. "That's right," Xena said as she tucked a blanket around the already drowsy form of her lover. "You take a little nap and by the time the stew is ready, you'll feel much better. Do you want me to lay down with you for a bit?"
Gabrielle nodded sleepily as she felt the comforting warmth of her warrior wrap around her, the palm of her hand now lightly massaging the bard's sore abdomen. Xena secretly loved the feel of the bard in her arms this way, and she couldn't help but smile at the 'little girl' look on her lover's face. Gabrielle sometimes tried to suffer in silence with the physical pain, and Xena could never bring herself to admit to the young woman that she felt useful and needed in this capacity. It was hard for the warrior to describe the feeling in words, even to herself. She had so little to offer the woman she loved, in physical terms. She did have abilities, however, and if those skills offered Gabrielle's life any small comfort at all, that's what the warrior's heart took pleasure in. When Xena felt ill or out of sorts she wanted to dig a hole and escape from humanity. Gabrielle had learned not to get too close on these occasions because the warrior would snap at the first sign of comforting. Gabrielle, however was a cuddler. Xena leaned against the saddle and relaxed at the pleasant feel of Gabrielle's back against her chest. She buried her face in the bard's hair and breathed deeply. Her senses were supernatural compared to most mortals. Whether it was something honed, as were her warrior skills or a gift from the Gods at birth, Xena used them to their fullest extent. She felt something stir in her heart as she breathed in the distinct scent of her lover, along with the sweet, metallic smell of blood that would linger for the next few days. The bard fell asleep quickly in Xena's comforting embrace, the warrior gently rocking and whispering soft sounds of love and comfort. * * *
"Hi, sleepyhead... hungry?" Xena asked when she saw Gabrielle stretch and yawn. "Uh huh," the bard nodded. "That smells good," she continued as Xena set a small wooden bowl in front of the woman and Gabrielle laid a loving
touch on the warrior's forearm. "I feel a lot better, thanks." The warrior smiled her reply. "Your mother even provided dessert," she said, unwrapping the small cloth covered bundle that Hecuba had made up for them. Inside was a loaf of nutbread and the small round pastries the warrior had become so fond of. The mention of her mother put a slight frown on the bard's face, and she remembered the dream she had earlier. Quietly finishing their meal, Xena then cleaned up the dishes and returned to add more logs to the fire and sat down on the bedroll, next to Gabrielle. "Dinar for your thoughts?" The warrior bantered. "I've been thinking about what my mother told me today," the bard looked away from Xena's gaze and began absently playing with a piece of her hair. "I thought that might be it." "Xe, what do you think she meant?" Gabrielle asked. Xena had steeled herself for this question. She wouldn't lie to her partner, but she dreaded the emotional turmoil this could put her bard through if Xena's hunch were in fact true. She also knew that Gabrielle was a smart woman and had learned to read people quite well. "Why don't you tell me what you think about all this first." The warrior replied. "I don't think Herodotus is my father." The bard stated flatly. Xena was momentarily stunned at the bard's admission. She had thought Gabrielle would skirt the issue or mull it around before coming to this conclusion. It was obvious the bard had been thinking about this. Xena had to admit, however, this was the same conclusion she had come to. "I think it might explain a few things," she said hesitantly, settling her hand
on Gabrielle's knee, simply to give comfort from the contact. "Like why I look nothing like him or Lila... these feelings of always being different... why he hates me so..." the bard trailed off. "Or," Xena drawled the word out, placing a gentle finger under her bard's chin, tilting her face until their eyes met. "We both could be letting our minds and emotions get the better of us here. We could be blowing this way out of proportion. Herodotus could be your father, and just mad as Hades that he lost his oldest child to, who he thinks, is a murderous Warlord. Brie, we've both seen natural fathers treat their children worse than this. I just want you to be open to all the possibilities for his behavior." "What about what mother said... it's about who he sees when he looks at me. Who does he see... my real father?" "Okay, I'll play Hades advocate here. Maybe she meant he sees me... he probably thinks I have you under my spell and you're a slave to me and my Warlord desires. That would make any father see red." "There's just one flaw to that theory, Xe. My father has treated me this way all my life." Warm tears began to roll down the bards cheeks and splash silently into her lap. "Oh, Brie," the warrior gently embraced the weeping bard. "Why haven't you ever told me any of this?" "I guess I was just too ashamed... I didn't want to admit it even to myself, but now all the pieces seem to fit too well for it to not be the truth." "I can understand the way you feel, love. But there's no reason to be ashamed in front of me... remember, my father tried to kill me when I was a child." The two women sat that way until a breaking log in the fire hissed, and sent sparks flying into the darkness of the night sky.
"I had the oddest dream when I was by the pond this afternoon, Xe." Gabrielle again started the conversation. "I don't know if it's something I made up or it was real. I was maybe five or six seasons old and I remembered my mother and uncle Delos arguing." Gabrielle told Xena all about the dream, that the bard was fast becoming convinced was a memory, and again the silence stole over the two. "I don't think it's coincidence, Xe... I don't think he's my father... and you think that too, don't you?" "Yes, love... I do." The warrior said softly, enfolding her lover in strong arms, cursing her inability to take this pain away from her bard. Then, holding Gabrielle in her embrace she felt a possessive twinge strike her and she wanted this woman in her arms to know that she would always be there, not just for now, but for always. She wanted the bard to know that she wanted no other... would never, could never... be with another; that a piece of the bard's heart and soul had been planted within the warrior. It was then that the warrior began to think of a way. How do you show the woman you love all these feelings you have in your heart? You marry her. * * *
"I sure can tell you feel better today," the warrior called down from her steed. "I feel great," Gabrielle replied keeping up the swift pace the warrior let her companion set. "What did you put in that tea anyway?" "Trade secret, my love. I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you," she commented, lowering her voice an octave. "Take it easy, though, Brie... I don't want to have to carry you into Amphipolis."
"Okay, I'll try not to push it. Of course, I figure we'll get to the inn oh, about dinnertime... well, and the way your mom cooks..." she let the thought trail. Xena let out a loud laugh as she dismounted and grabbed Argo's reins to walk beside the bard. "If you ever again accuse me of thinking solely with a certain part of my anatomy," she raised her eyebrows suggestively," "I'll remind you of this," the warrior finished jabbing her finger lightly at her lover's bare midriff. Both women laughed, the warrior watching Gabrielle's face for any signs of sadness or depression. Much to her happiness, the bard seemed to actually be taking the previous evening's revelations in stride. The young woman had finally admitted, before sleep overtook them both last night, that she almost felt better knowing that it wasn't anything she had done that caused Herodotus to treat her the way he had for so many years. * * *
"Gabrielle?" The older woman smiled at the young bard, and quickly encompassed her in a warm hug. "Where's Xena?" "Hi, Cyrene. Your daughter is stabling Argo... she'll be in shortly." Gabrielle smiled back at her lover's mother. Cyrene was one of the few family members, between she and Xena that the bard expected to take their news well. Gabrielle also truly loved this woman who reminded her so much of her warrior. It was easy to see where Xena's hard work ethic, honor and integrity came from. Cyrene kissed the young woman on the cheek and gave her a hug usually reserved for her daughter, but Gabrielle had become like a daughter to her and she loved this young woman who had so completely stolen her own daughters heart. If only Xena could see what others see she would know
how much this young woman loves her.
There was something different in the bard's eye, or maybe it was the way she carried herself, but Cyrene knew that something had changed. It was as if Gabrielle looked older, without actually aging. More mature. That was when the innkeeper noticed the pendant around the bard's neck. The shape of each heart looked exactly like the armor of Xena's breastplate, and on closer inspection, the two hearts joined to form and X. "She finally told you," Cyrene exclaimed, holding the pendant in her own fingers. Gabrielle's smile, coupled with the light that sparkled in her eyes was all the answer the innkeeper needed. A few heartbeats later, when Xena finally came through the entrance, her mother practically knocked her over with a fierce hug. The warrior, who had always been a little uncomfortable with public displays of affection in the past, thoroughly surprised her mother by returning her affections. Xena looked at her bard over her mother's shoulder with a questioning glance. Gabrielle returned the gaze, shrugging her shoulders and raising her hands in the air as if to say, I didn't say a word and I have no idea why
she's acting that way! "Well... it's good to see you too, mom," the warrior said hesitantly, with a half smile. "You finally did it... you finally told her you love her!" Cyrene said, not breaking the embrace. The remaining patrons at the bar started to look around and see what all the innkeeper's happiness was about. It was about now that Xena noticed people gawking at the large warrior and then looking the young bard over. The more her mother gushed, the redder the warrior's cheeks got. "I'm right... you did tell her?" Cyrene continued to say for all to hear. "Yes, mom... I told her," Xena said lowering her voice and disentangling
herself from the older woman. "Can we not tell the whole tavern?" "Then why are you turning all red? Don't tell me she turned you down?" Cyrene asked innocently. Gabrielle was enjoying this display immensely. Never had she ever been witness to the Warrior Princess as flustered or embarrassed as she was this minute. The bard nearly burst out laughing at her lover's predicament. No one can humiliate a child quite as well as a mother and even though she was a fearsome warrior, Xena was still a little girl to Cyrene. "No, she didn't turn me down." Xena replied. "By the Gods, Xena, don't tell me you haven't consummated the relationship yet?" Her mother asked, astounded. "Mother!" Gabrielle had just about lost it with that remark and the fact that Xena's face was completely red now. The young woman was one heartbeat away from laughing out loud at her lover's dilemma, when the dark-haired warrior noticed her bard. Xena was very uncomfortable right about now. It wasn't bad enough her mother was telling the whole bar about her new found relationship with Gabrielle, and she really didn't want to talk about her sex life with her own mother, but when Xena looked over and saw her bard grinning from ear to ear at her plight, she knew it was time to retaliate. "Gab-ri-elle..." the warrior drawled. The bard knew that look in her lover's eye and clamped a hand over her mouth to keep from bursting out laughing "Gabrielle, so help me Goddess, if you laugh... if you so much as have a smile on your face underneath that hand, I'm going to pick you up and throw you in the horse trough!"
The bard was fighting a losing battle and she knew it, but was holding on valiantly, when a man from the bar called out, "what's consummated?" Gabrielle nearly fell over she burst out laughing so hard. "Okay, that's it." Xena said as she quickly grabbed the young woman and threw her over her shoulder, heading for the door. "Xena!" Gabrielle shouted. A large framed man walked through the entrance to the inn just as Xena got to the door. His dark hair and blue eyes were unmistakable and he smiled broadly at his sister and the small bundle that fought her grasp. "Xena... if you've been fishing, you forgot to throw this one back... she's not nearly big enough to keep!" "Toris!" Gabrielle yelled. Xena's brother just continued to laugh heartily at the young bard's dilemma. "Xena," Gabrielle pleaded. "Please, let me down." "Are you sufficiently embarrassed yet?" "Yes!" The warrior brought the woman over her shoulder and caught her in an embrace before her feet touched the ground. "Good... then we're even," she finished, kissing the tip of her lover's nose and smiling down at her. Gabrielle slapped the warrior's arm playfully and did the same to Toris who was still watching the couple with a little bit of envy. "All right children..." Cyrene said as the three guiltily smiled at her. The older woman couldn't keep up the stern pretense, however, and smiled
back. "I know you two must be hungry... I'll have some food out here in no time," she said as her voice trailed off into the kitchen. Xena and Gabrielle were later in getting to the inn than they had hoped and dreams of a hot meal left their heads as the last few patrons were having some drinks at the bar. The two women smiled in delight, however, when Cyrene brought out plates of steaming food and mugs of ale. I already have Mellie making up your room, Xena... Toris, take the girls bags up for them, dear." Cyrene said as the women dove into their food. "We can get those, Toris... don't worry." Xena said to her brother. "No problem, I was headed to bed myself, I'll take them on the way up." He gave all three women a hug and carried the bags up the steps to the back of the inn. Xena sat sprawled across the bench with her legs up and a mug of port in her hand. She watched through heavy lidded eyes as her lover and her mother caught up on the kind of inconsequential talk the warrior was no good at. A delicious warmth spread within her body and she knew it was partly due to the fact that this was home. There was a certain comfort factor to being in the inn where she and Lyceus, and Toris had grown up and played. She felt her reflexes begin to relax a little. "So, when do I get to go to a wedding?" Cyrene asked in her no nonsense way. Xena's eyes popped open and she immediately looked over at Gabrielle to gauge her bard's reaction to the question. The young woman blushed slightly, but never said a word. Gabrielle yawned deeply and stood from the table with a sweet smile on her face. "I'm... um, I'm going to bed. I hope you two don't mind, but I'm really exhausted." She said, the truth in her words evident by the fatigued look of
her features. The young woman hugged Cyrene and wished her a good night and squeezed her warrior's shoulder as she passed. Xena moved to take the young woman's hand in her own and gently brushed her lips across the back of the bard's fingers. "I'll be up shortly, love," Xena said as her bard smiled and reached down to kiss the warrior's temple. The warrior's eyes closed and a look of pleasure crossed her features at the bard's gentle touch. Cyrene was astonished when she saw her daughter's reaction to Gabrielle's touch. She was surprised that Xena not only allowed the young woman to touch her in front of the older woman, but even more taken back by the absolute look of gratification on the warrior's face. Once Gabrielle was gone, Cyrene looked with worry at her daughter. "I take it I said the wrong thing?" "I haven't asked Gabrielle to marry me yet, mother," Xena said without looking up. "Sweet Artemis, young woman, what are you waiting for? Women like that girl upstairs only come around once in a lifetime, Xena. If I were you--" Xena held up a hand to stop her mother's tirade. "I said yet, mom." She smiled. "Actually, I just decided I would ask her last night, but it's a little more complicated than you might think. Gabrielle is Queen of the Amazon Nation; I can't just throw her over my shoulder and carry her off. I have to petition the tribe for permission to marry their Queen and then I have to make an official petition to Gabrielle. The whole thing has to be witnessed by a round of Amazon's. And then there's the fact that Gabrielle might not even want to marry me." She said this last, not wanting to even think of such a possibility, but it had to be considered. Gabrielle may love her, but did she really want to commit her life to a warrior? "Then there's been a lot of stuff going on in Gabrielle's life lately and I'm not
exactly sure she wants to make a decision like this right now." Xena quietly explained everything they had gone through in Potidaea, including the suspicions about Herodotus. "What an amazing girl," Cyrene started, "I'm proud to have her as an addition to our family," the older woman placed a loving hand over the large, callused one of her only daughter. "So, how many Amazon's is a round?" Cyrene asked her daughter with a smile. "Forty," the warrior answered. "I've got a plan, though. I'll need your help. Tomorrow I'll write a message to Ephiny explaining everything. It should only take a week at most to get them here. If you can find someone in the village to deliver the letter for me, we'll be in business." She beamed. "I don't know who is luckier... You or Gabrielle." Cyrene answered. * * *
"Welcome to my world," Gabrielle smiled sarcastically at Cyrene as Xena brusquely moved through the kitchen, past the two women, and out the door. The warrior had barely grunted a few words at Gabrielle and was gone. "She just gets that way sometimes," the bard said trying to reassure the older woman, wondering a little herself at her lover's humor that had been steadily getting worse over the last few days. The older woman threw a handful of flour on the wooden board she was about to knead some dough on. Gabrielle stood next to her, doing the same. The bard enjoyed the time she was spending at the inn with Xena's family. They were accepting and loving of their daughter's lover, and Gabrielle wished she felt as comfortable around her own mother as the
woman who now stood next to her. They had been in Amphipolis for ten days, Xena and Gabrielle both taking pleasure from helping Cyrene at the inn. Xena had borrowed a shirt and pants from her brother and pitched in to help her sibling finish off the addition of more rooms to the inn. Gabrielle was completely within her element and assisted Cyrene in the kitchen during the day, moving into the tavern to tell stories in the evening. Cyrene's business always picked up when Gabrielle was in town. She was an exceptional bard and even folks that didn't usually frequent the tavern, would stop by to hear some of her tales. Each night the patron's left her dinars in appreciation, and each night she tried to give them to Cyrene. When the innkeeper refused, the bard knew exactly what she would use the extra money for. She searched the village until she found a silversmith and put her money down for her gift. "How in the world do you put up with that, Gabrielle?" Cyrene asked, bringing the bard into the present once again. Gabrielle smiled one of her usual 'take it in stride' smiles and responded. "Some days are better than others. Oh, she's hardly like this at all anymore; you should have seen her when we first started traveling together. Back then if I could get her to share a complete a sentence in one day, I'd be happy." Gabrielle blew a wisp of hair from her forehead, wiping across it with her forearm. A small smudge of flour found it's way to her cheek as she stretched muscles that had begun to ache from candlemarks of kneading dough. She explored her own soul and felt herself smile at the journey her heart had taken on it's way to the unconditional love she now felt for her warrior. A knock on the kitchen door put a temporary halt to their conversation. Cyrene wiped her hands and pulled open the wooden door expecting some type of deliveryman. Instead a young boy from the silversmiths shop stood with a small package.
"Good morning ma'am, Calas asked me to bring this 'round to the young lady," he said, indicating Gabrielle and holding out the package. "Oh, wonderful," Gabrielle exclaimed, grinning. "Cyrene, would you take it for me, my hands are a mess." The older woman took the small package and gave the youngster a sweet cake, sending the excited boy on his way. "What is it?" Cyrene asked. "A present for Xe... open it will you, so I can see it?" The bard said rinsing the sticky dough from her fingers in a bucket of clean water. Gabrielle stood next to Cyrene drying her hands as the older woman opened the leather wrapping. "Oh, Gabrielle... it's beautiful!" Cyrene admitted. The pendant had been a design that the bard had toyed with in trying to envision something as unique and special as the one Xena had presented her with. It had to indicate that it was literally a piece of Gabrielle, but also be symbolic of the sharing of their lives. She had finally found an artisan who was willing to work with her and the final product was more than she could have ever hoped for. The pendant was silver, on a heavier chain than the one Gabrielle wore. The bard's initial was in the center, the letter G was fashioned in a script that mimicked the scrollwork of Xena's armor. On top of the initial lay a quill, but not the typical writing quill Gabrielle used everyday. This quill almost looked the same; a feather tapering to a point, but instead of a point to hold ink, there was a sword's hilt; a feather that was a sword. To the bard, it spoke of warrior and bard as one. "Cyrene, would you hold on to it for me? If Xena even thinks I'm trying to hide something from her she'll be like a kid on Solstice Eve. Patience isn't exactly one of her many skills, you know." The warrior's mother laughed, understanding that, in some ways, adulthood
had changed her daughter very little. She put the carefully wrapped package in the pouch at her waist and patted it. "It will be safe from prying eyes here." She said. * * *
Xena's bad mood was coming out in the worst way possible. She had sent off a message to Ephiny the day after they had arrived in Amphipolis telling of her wish to bond with Gabrielle and requesting the Regent's help. Three days later a rider arrived at the inn with a message for Xena from the Amazon Nation. Xena recognized Ephiny's seal and opened the scroll to a short, but encouraging message.
So the old tree that stands alone in the forest has finally fallen? I've been waiting years for them to cry 'timber' over you! It may take me a little more than a week to get things prepared on this end. I'll be coming along... wouldn't miss the look on Gabrielle's face for the world! Ephiny
It had been almost 7 days since she received the message from Ephiny and still no sign of the Amazons. The more time that went by the more nervous Xena got, until she was beginning to take it out on everyone around her, including Gabrielle. This is great. By the time they get here
and I can ask her to marry me, I'll be lucky if she's even speaking to me! Just then her ears picked up a sound like the whisper of a boot in the dirt.
The warrior smiled broadly and folded her arms across her chest. "It's about damn time you got here!" "Do you know how much I hate that you can do that?" Ephiny's voice hissed. The two women clutched one another's forearms in a gesture of friendship. "I slipped into town by myself," the regent whispered, "I've brought forty-five of the Amazon Nation's best... few extra so no one will scream about protocol. They're camped in the next valley... so what's you're plan Warrior Princess?" "Plan?" Xena asked. "Actually, my plan was just to get you here... I thought you might... you know, have a little input once you got here." She finished with a shy sort of grin. "Just so happens, I do," the Regent smiled and proceeded to share her idea with the warrior. * * *
Cyrene was just showing Gabrielle how to put a glaze on the sweet cakes she had made when Xena walked into the room. "Hi," the warrior said nervously, beginning to lose a bit of her resolve. "Hi," both women said in unison, not able to look of from their task. Xena walked over to her mother, standing next to Gabrielle, and quickly kissed the older woman on the top of the head. Cyrene looked at her daughter and then at Gabrielle who had finished the glaze and glanced up at the warrior.
"That means 'I'm sorry mother, and I won't be such a grump anymore'," Gabrielle explained Xena's kiss to Cyrene. Xena's eyes darted around the room searching for some means of escape, her ears beginning to turn red under her mother's scrutiny. "Yea... what she said," the warrior sheepishly admitted. "Uh, mom... I wonder if you could... I want to..." Xena looked at her mother, trying to convey with her eyes, her need to be alone with Gabrielle. "Oh..."Cyrene said. "I suddenly remember a pressing engagement." She finished with a smile and was immediately out the kitchen door. "Hey, are you baking bread or just bathing in flour?" The warrior teased, noticing the flour on the bard's cheek. Gabrielle smiled and stood on her toes to gently brush her lips against the tall warrior's. Xena tenderly cupped the beautiful woman's face, wiping off the smudge of flour. "Brie, I'm sorry I've been such a bear the last few days. I'd like to make it up to you if you'll let me." Gabrielle raised an eyebrow suggestively, quickly thinking of all the ways she'd like her warrior to make it up to her. "Well, there is that," the warrior said in a sultry voice, "but, I was thinking more along the lines of a picnic... just the two of us? I'd like to bring you up to the lake... the one with the waterfall I told you about." Gabrielle's eyes lit up. "Why, warrior... are you asking me out on a date?" Gabrielle teased. Xena took Gabrielle's hand and brought her fingers up to the warrior's lips, feeling traces of the sweet honey glaze on the bard's fingers. The warrior brought the bard's index finger to her lips, the tip of her tongue reaching out to slightly graze the sticky digit. Her warm mouth enveloped the tip of the
finger and as she swirled her tongue lightly, she began a slow sucking motion that the bard instantly felt between her legs. Xena closed her eyes, breathing deeply, as her mouth suddenly filled with the taste of her bard and sweet honey. "Yes," the warrior whispered her answer, reluctantly releasing the hold her tongue had on the bard's finger. "Huh?" Gabrielle asked, momentarily confused her face flush with sudden desire. "The answer to your question... it's yes," Xena repeated. "Oh, Gods," Gabrielle said breathlessly, "what was the question?" * * *
"It's breathtaking, Xe... did you and Lyceus really jump into the water from there?" The bard pointed, indicating the high waterfall that slid over rocks and flora to spill into the lake below. "Yep. I was in a lot better shape back then, though." "Oh, really? You mean..." Gabrielle drawled as Xena gently pulled her down from Argo, the bard's body pressing against the warrior's, "... This body was actually better at one time?" The corners of the warrior's mouth curled upward, her eyes narrowing slightly. "With age comes experience, and with experience... more skills." She said running her tongue against the length of the bard's ear. Gabrielle shivered at the warm moistness. "If you acquire any more skills, it just may kill me." Both women chuckled as they reluctantly pulled apart.
"It's starting to get a little chilly, why don't you grab some firewood and I'll setup our dinner... and anything else we may need," she finished with an inviting smile. Gabrielle walked off a short distance into the trees and Xena turned back to the mare and began unloading the packages they had packed into the saddlebags. The warrior knew her bard was hungry and would probably want to eat right away, but Xena was still trying to get her stomach to quit doing flip-flops. The picnic, which was a way to be alone with her bard it's true, was also a ruse to get her out of the village. The Amazons would enter Amphipolis and be quartered in the north end of town. When Xena was prepared to begin the ceremony, Gabrielle's presence would be requested, saying a petitioner requested an audience with the Queen of the Amazons. That's when the warrior figured she would probably throw up all over someone's boots. Not that she didn't want to bond with Gabrielle. She knew she loved the bard deeply and would never find another who could ever take the young woman's place in her heart. It's just that this was just about everything in this world that made Xena sick at her stomach; crowds, speaking in front of crowds, and above all, baring her soul to a crowd. The warrior shook herself from her worrying and once again began emptying their treasures from the saddlebags. She heard a rustling noise behind her. "That was fast," she smiled, not yet turning toward her bard. The bard didn't say a word. "Brie?" Xena said, turning toward her lover. Xena's blood ran cold at the sight in front of her. A tall warrior, the angular features of her face framed by her short blonde hair held a hand over Gabrielle's mouth, the bard's eyes wide in fear. In her other hand the warrior pressed the tip of a stiletto type dagger just inside the bard's ear.
The stranger, as well as Xena, knew the bard might live with a sliced throat, if her warrior could get to her in time, but the young Queen would never live once the dagger plunged into her ear, scrambling her brains. Xena's finger twitched slightly against the metal of her chakram, her eyes darting around her to see armed men among the trees. Pulling herself up to her full height, her eyes transformed to pale blue, her voice as cutting and cold as ice when she spoke. "Let her go or I'll cut your vicious heart out, you pathetic little bitch!" Gabrielle felt the woman behind her flinch slightly at the warrior's tone, the bard's own body shivering at the timber of her warrior's voice. "Why, Xena... aren't you even going to introduce me to your little friend here? Or is she a lover... wife... slave?" She spat out the last word, jerking the small woman in her arms as she did so, tightening her grip on the dagger. "Remove your weapons and your armor, Xena" the blonde commanded. Xena continued to stare down the woman, not moving to divest herself of her weapons. "Do it!" the blonde screamed. "Do you think I'm fucking around?" The blonde quickly slid her hand from Gabrielle's mouth to the bard's throat, wrapping her large hand around her neck; she slowly started to squeeze the life from the young woman. Xena loosened her chakram, then undid the straps that held her scabbard to her back, throwing both weapons on the ground at the blonde's feet. "Xena, no," Gabrielle whispered hoarsely as the woman behind her tightened her grip on the bard's throat to silence her. "Let Gabrielle go, Kirren... this is between me and you." Xena said, dispassionately, trying to keep her voice steady and devoid of emotion. She knew she couldn't let Kirren leave this grove with Gabrielle or the
chances were good her bard would never live to see her lover again. "Let her go... you don't want to fight me... it's a fight you can't win." Xena stated. The blonde chuckled, a deep evil laugh as Gabrielle began to scream. "Xena, behind you!" The warrior was so intent on watching Gabrielle; she lost track of the men behind her. Just as Gabrielle screamed Xena turned her head only to feel the heavy strike of a mallet across her temple. The warrior's knees hit the ground and she turned her head back toward her lover. "Gab--ri--elle," Xena groaned as she fell forward, her unconscious body hitting the dirt with a loud thud. Gabrielle screamed out her lover's name and struggled in her captor's grasp, not caring for her own safety. The tall woman Xena had called Kirren suddenly jerked Gabrielle by her hair, moving around to face the bard. Her long fingers pulled the young woman's head back, exposing her neck, pressing the point of the dagger just under the bard's chin until Gabrielle felt a warm drop of fluid roll down the skin of her neck. Realizing it was her own blood; the bard ceased her struggle and listened to the taller woman. "I'd like to have you around a little longer, Gabrielle, to torture your precious warrior, but don't test my patience. I'll kill you if I have to, and trust me, little one... I don't kill women quickly. I make it very, very slow... and very, very painful. So unless you want me to gut you from this furry little patch," she grabbed the bard's crotch, " to your scrawny neck, I'd quit trying to get on my bad side!" "Tie her hands and put on a blindfold." Kirren pushed the bard back into the waiting arms of a soldier who began to carry out the blonde warrior's order.
Walking over to the still form of the Warrior Princess, Kirren rolled the warrior over with the toe of her boot, squatting down on the balls of her feet she grinned. "Oh, how the mighty have fallen, eh, Xena?" the warrior whispered. "Guess we'll be able to have that showdown after all. See, I have the one thing that will guarantee you'll show up, don't I?" Kirren looked back at the bard as she was being hoisted into the saddle of a waiting horse and laughed. "Let's go... tie her hands and feet." The warrior indicated Xena's unconscious form as she mounted behind the blindfolded bard. "Let's not make it too easy for her." * * *
Darkness was beginning to descend over Amphipolis and Ephiny paced nervously around the inn. "Something's wrong. Xena told me she would be back before nightfall." The Regent said to Eponin. "Ep, take a few riders and wander out to that lake... make sure everything's okay." "And, if they're just otherwise engaged?" The warrior shot back. "Then try not to let Xena throw you over the waterfall." The Regent said with a wry smile. * * *
Eponin pulled up and caught the reins of the golden mare. Argo's saddle was still on and her saddlebags hung askew on the mare's rump.
"Easy girl," the warrior said in a soothing tone as she looked around to get her bearings. Spurring her own mount on, she quickly made her way straight for the area of forest surrounding the waterfall. Just as the Amazon riders broke through the copse of trees, they saw Xena's unconscious body. Feeling for a pulse, Eponin was relieved when she felt the even pounding in the warrior neck. Dried blood along the side of the warrior's face made her injury look worse than it was. "You two search the area for any signs of the Queen," Eponin nodded toward her two companions, but she already knew it was hopeless. If Xena had been bound and knocked unconscious, there was little chance Gabrielle would still be around. "Tarazon," Eponin indicated the fourth rider of their party. "Get back to the Regent and tell her to get up here quick... there's been trouble." For the next candlemark Eponin cleaned Xena's wound and tried to gently revive the dark-haired warrior. Xena's eyes slowly started to flutter and open, the blue eyes narrowing in an attempt to push down the pain in her head and focus. "Gabrielle!" Xena cried out, suddenly remembering the events that had led up to this moment. The warrior and Eponin both scrambled to their feet at the approaching sound of thundering hooves. Ephiny jumped from her horse before the animal had even come to a stop. "Xena, are you allright?" she asked noticing the blood that still oozed from an angry looking gash at the warrior's temple, the skin starting to discolor. "What happened to Gabrielle?" Before Xena had a chance to answer the two Amazons that Eponin had sent in search of any signs of their Queen returned.
"Regent?" One of the warriors held out Gabrielle's staff. "We found the tracks of riders... perhaps twenty. They're making their way into the northern hills." Xena grabbed the stave from the warrior's hands as if to connect with the bard herself from the contact with the wood. Looped around the top of the staff was a thin strip of leather that was tied around a large white feather. The plume had been dipped in blood. Every Amazon in the group recognized this symbolic gesture of revenge. Xena's thought processes were beginning to shut down on her. She couldn't get her mind to focus on anything but the terrified look in Gabrielle's eyes before the warrior was rendered unconscious. Even now, as the only woman she loved... ever would love, had been torn from her; a deep-seated anger filled her body. Darkness within her begged for release, her barely contained rage flowing through her veins along with her blood. The warrior turned away from the eyes of the Amazons, her limbs shaking as she struggled to keep her tenuous grip on reality. Suddenly not caring whose eyes watched her, she slowly sunk to her knees and let out a tortured howl. "GAB-RI-EEEELLEEEE!" The warrior's scream came from deep within her chest and it echoed throughout the hills. The lonely cry of anguish sent chills up the spines of the warriors who surrounded her, the creatures of the forest fearfully hastening towards safe hiding places. The sound echoed throughout the forest and against the mountains until there was only silence again. * * *
Gabrielle felt the horse she was on draw to a halt just as the last echoes of
her lover's anguished cry dissipated into the air. "Well... looks like Xena's awake." Kirren laughed. "She must have gotten the little present we left for her," she said to no one in particular, knowing the meaning of the blood-covered feather wouldn't be lost on Xena. "I need to relieve myself," Gabrielle asked the warrior behind her. "Hold it in!" Kirren sneered. "Please..." Gabrielle pleaded. With an exasperated sigh the warrior slid off her mount and roughly pulled the bard down to the ground. "Let's get some rules taken care of right now, shall we, your highness? I have no intention of killing you, Gabrielle but I will if I have to... do you believe me?" "Yes," the bard answered. "The blindfold stays on no matter what. If you take it off, then you force me to kill you. If you try to escape... I'll kill you, if you annoy me in any way possible... I'll kill you. Now, is there any part of that you don't understand?" "No," Gabrielle replied. You're trying to tell me you're a nut case... I get it. Kirren began to drag the bard off the path and practically threw her to the ground. The tall woman released one of the bard's hands and stood back. "Are you going to just stand there and watch me?" Gabrielle asked, her modesty overcoming her better judgment at questioning the woman. Even though she was unable to see, she felt the tall woman staring at her. "If you have to go bad enough, you'll go!" she hissed. The bard did what she had to do and stood up. Before she knew it she was once again being hoisted into the saddle in front of her captor.
Gabrielle wasn't about to give in to this woman. Kirren may hold all the cards, but the bard knew Xena wouldn't stop until she found her. The young bard had a stubborn streak and a hot temper once provoked, but she pushed all these emotions down and buried them. She needed to play this smart. No need to give Kirren a reason to hurt her in any way. Gabrielle thought about it and realized what the tall woman said was probably true. If she was going to so much trouble by blindfolding the bard, she must intend to release her at some point. Gabrielle also took the threats to her life seriously. This Kirren, whoever
she is... oh, let me guess... another one of Xena's old army buddies, is most definitely not working with a full deck. She says she won't kill me, but that look in her eyes... I think if I gave her half a reason she would. * * *
The bard could feel the pace the horse were being driven at and knew they must be leagues away from Amphipolis by now. She could feel the jerk and pull of the horse as the animal began to navigate over hilly terrain and she started to worry about Xena trailing the fast moving party. All the while, the young Queen fingered the beaded bracelet on her wrist. When they left the Amazon village Ephiny had called it a friendship bracelet, as she tied the leather together at the young woman's wrist. Gabrielle slowly worked at the ends of the bracelet until she had it untied. Pulling at the beads that made up the piece of jewelry, she carefully flicked one of the wooden beads off the end of the leather twine, never knowing where it landed. The bard began to count and when she thought a quarter of a candlemark had gone by she pulled another bead off the string. All she could do was hope it would be enough for Xena to follow. Kirren smiled smugly to herself. Xena hadn't been nearly as much of a challenge as she thought she would be. I have to keep an eye on this one,
though. She's smarter than Ares thinks, this little one. Why would an Amazon Queen be traveling with the Warrior Princess? The tall warrior felt the Amazon's body fall against her as the horse began a steep ascent. She felt the smaller woman's warmth between her legs and against her chest, smirking at the realization of why the former Destroyer of Nations had the young woman around. The blonde haired warrior chuckled to herself as the young Queen tried to pull her body away from hers by grabbing onto the saddlehorn. I know I promised I wouldn't touch her now,
but maybe after I defeat Xena and become Ares Chosen, I'll take this little one for myself. Kirren laughed aloud at the prospect. A laugh that sent chills running across Gabrielle's skin. * * *
The sound of agony and grief washed over the Amazons as they stood there, listening to the last of the echoes from Xena's tortured cry. Eponin made a move to comfort her friend, but Ephiny's grasp held her back. The Regent shook her head back and forth, waiting to see what the Warrior Princess would do with the anger that was obviously building within her. Xena's breathing became labored as she fought for control of her own will. She gripped hard and tried to push back the darkness that threatened to overtake her soul. A staggering sense of emptiness filled the warrior. Her world had just fallen apart and the pain that filled her soul was beyond anything she had ever felt before. Xena's knuckles turned white as they continued to tightly grip the wood of her lover's staff... Gabrielle's staff. Suddenly Xena found herself tenderly stroking the staff, no longer holding onto the cherished wood with a frantic grip, she caressed it's smoothness almost idly with her thumb, The feel of her bard replenishing her senses;
hope beginning to fill the emptiness. As if her darkness and anger were visible entities, Xena breathed deep and the emotions were inhaled, buried heavily with her past once more. Jumping to her feet the warrior turned sapphire eyes, now filled with clarity, toward the Regent. "She's got Gabrielle, but this means she's still alive," the warrior said, pulling the bloody feather from Gabrielle's staff. "We've got to find Gabrielle before that witch changes her mind, though!" Xena finished as she started toward Argo. "Xena, wait a minute," Ephiny said grabbing the dark warrior's arm. "We need some kind of a plan. Who took Gabrielle, and why?" Xena shrugged away from the Regent's grasp, checking Argo's reins and saddle before jumping into the saddle. "We don't have time... I'll tell you on the way." Xena looked down pleadingly at Ephiny. The Regent was more than a competent warrior, but the fear she saw in Xena's eyes was enough to convince her that immediate action was necessary if they were to save the Queen. Making her decision, she barked out a few short commands. "Kesta and Tanti... you two ride up front with Xena and I, and take us to where the tracks start. Amazons, mount!" Forty Amazon warriors were an impressive site on horseback and they galloped along, quickly becoming infected with Xena's sense of urgency. The Warrior Princess sent a quick prayer to Artemis that they would be enough. * * *
"Looks like they've split up into 3 groups," Kesta reported to the Regent. The young woman had a small build for an Amazon, but she knew how to use the sword strapped to her waist, and her tracking abilities were equaled only by the Warrior Princess. "There's really no way of telling which group has the Queen or even if they're all headed for the same destination." "What do you make of this?" Eponin rolled a small round object between her index finger and thumb. Ephiny wrapped a steel grip around the warrior's wrist and pulled Eponin's hand under the light of the torch. Xena knelt beside the two women as the Regent took possession of the small bead and held it up closer to the firelight. "It's a bead. From a necklace maybe?" Eponin said as they examined the small, carved bead, tinted blue with dye. "Was Gabrielle wearing--" The Amazon warrior was stopped abruptly by Xena's shaking head. "She only had her pendant on." Xena's voice said with a catch. The dark warrior stared intently at the round object trying to remember what Gabrielle had been wearing when they left the inn that day. Shaking her head in defeat, she lowered her eyes to the ground and watched as the light from the flame flickered across Ephiny's ankle. Ephiny followed Xena's eyes and stopped to rest on the ankle bracelet she wore. Ripping off the beaded anklet, the Regent held it up for Xena to compare with the solo bead. "I gave one to Gabrielle as a friendship bracelet..." Ephiny's voice trailed off, cursing her own stupidity for not realizing it sooner. "It means Gabrielle came this way," Eponin said excitedly. "It means more than that," Xena said, "It means she's alive... that's my girl!"
For the first time since Gabrielle's capture, the warrior's eyes held a true glimmer of hope. Ephiny quickly passed the bead around to show everyone what they were looking for and more torches were lit. It was about a week till the new moon and the darkness that fell once the sun had gone down made tracking nearly impossible. They had to walk, bringing up their mounts at a distance for fear they would trample some bit of evidence. They had searched for another candlemark, but in vain. They would have to backtrack and follow one of the other sets of tracks to search for more of Gabrielle's signs. "Xena," the Regent quietly pulled Xena aside. "We have to stop for the night." "No! We keep going." Xena began to pull away, but Ephiny held to her arm. "Xena, I understand how you feel, but this is getting us nowhere. I'm afraid in the dark we'll miss some sign that Gabrielle is trying to leave. Besides, these hills are getting steeper, I don't want anyone going over the edge of a cliff in the dark." Xena fought hard within herself as she listened to the Regent. "Xena, we're Amazons and we have a hard time picking our way through these hills. If we need to stop for the night then I'm sure they have to also." Xena couldn't refute Ephiny's logic and reluctantly agreed to make camp. They ran a cold camp so as not to alert Gabrielle's captors of their whereabouts. It was a quiet group as they all thought about the joyous reason they had come to Amphipolis, and how it had all turned out so horribly wrong. The Amazons sat in small groups, talking in quiet voices or cleaning their weapons. Ephiny noticed that Xena stayed slightly apart from the rest. The warrior sat on the ground a little ways off, just within the shadow of a tree, sharpening her sword.
As Ephiny approached she could her the sound of Xena's whetstone sliding across the metal of her blade. "You should eat something," the Regent said, offering the warrior a thick piece of jerky. Xena shook her head, never stopping the rhythm her hands set as they sharpened the sword. Ephiny didn't want Xena spiraling into a depression and she saw the frightening display the dark-haired warrior put on when they found the Queen's staff, so the Regent played her trump card. "Gabrielle wouldn't want you acting this way," She said. Xena stopped the motion of her hands without looking up. Finally she lifted her head and shook the dark locks from her eyes. A bittersweet smile appeared on her face. "You're right... she wouldn't." The warrior replied, holding her hand out to accept the piece of dried meat. Ephiny breathed a sigh of relief and sat down next her friend. "You told me Kirren was in your army... was she a soldier?" Ephiny asked. "She was an assassin," Xena replied as she chewed. "I used her for what I needed her for... she was good at her job. Even then I didn't like the look in her eyes. She didn't just kill people for money or even for sport... she killed simply for the pleasure of it. The things she did..." Xena's voice trailed off as her eyes took on the faraway look of a revisited memory. "Eph, I was a soulless, sadistic monster in those days and this girl made me afraid. I put up with her because I needed her, but pretty soon I knew I needed to get her out of my camp. I thought about just killing her... you don't have to watch your back so much when you end partnerships that way. She must have caught wind of what I was feeling because one day she up and challenges me in front of my men... I had no choice but to take her down."
"I take it she lived through the match," Ephiny referred to their present predicament. "It wasn't much of a match at all," Xena replied. "This was a girl who was a paid assassin. She knew a thousand ways to come up behind you and kill you without a sound, but she was a pretty pathetic warrior. I disarmed her half a dozen times, but she kept coming back for more. I resorted to slicing some pretty big cuts into her hands just so she couldn't pick up her sword any longer. When she finally gave up she told me she'd come back some day... someday when she was a better fighter than me, and she told me she would defeat me and take everything I had. Looks like she did." Xena finished with a grimace filled with bitter irony. "Why didn't you kill her?" Ephiny asked. "I just couldn't do it." The warrior looked straight at the Regent. "She was only fourteen, Eph." Xena said. "Sweet Artemis," the Regent responded, shaking her head sadly. "So, my past come back to bite Gabrielle again. When I kill, someone like Callisto tracks her down. When I don't kill... I guess you get the picture. When will I stop doing this to her?" Xena said as her eyes began to mist over. "We'd all put in for a new past if we could, Xena... you weren't the best person in the known world, but Gods know, you weren't the worst either. I think we both know that Gabrielle has always been aware of the possible consequences of loving a former Warlord." "I'm afraid, Eph," the warrior finally admitted in a soft voice. "Afraid of what I might become if something happens to Gabrielle. I can feel it starting already. Don't let me... don't let me break my promise to Gabrielle." Ephiny looked questioningly at the warrior. Xena lowered her eyes and spoke in a low whisper.
"I promised her if anything ever happened to her that I wouldn't become a monster. What if I can't control it... what do I do then?" Xena asked as, once again, she turned her blue eyes, brimming with tears, toward the Regent. "Promise me you won't let me break my promise. I'd rather feel your blade in my heart than to ever hurt Gabrielle. Promise me, Eph." "I promise," the Regent softly said. Long moments of silence passed until Ephiny heard the sound of the warrior's sharpening stone running across the metal of her sword. Neither woman spoke again, but Xena felt a strange comfort in having the Amazon seated beside her. If she didn't look up, she could almost imagine it was Gabrielle. * * *
"I don't believe this! That irritating little brat has turned her into a pathetic mess! She should be tearing up the countryside by now, instead she's sitting there whining about her past... how broken does that record sound." The God of War slumped into a chair and stroked his jaw thoughtfully. His plan had been simple, or so he thought. Kidnap the bard and watch Xena freak. Much to his disgust Ares had watched the two women become lovers and knew he had to make a move before Xena got any further away from him than she already had. He figured if Xena knew the psycho that had Gabrielle was probably going to torture and kill the brat, she'd lose it and Ares would be right there to pick up the pieces and offer his chosen an army to exact her revenge with. "She's just sitting there!" he bellowed. "What is it about that irritating blonde?" he mused.
"I've still got time." He smiled to himself. "It's a long way to the castle. You will be mine, Xena." * * *
Gabrielle was sore all over from the wild ride she had endured on horseback, not to mention the way she was pushed and dragged whenever she was led somewhere. She felt a rope being tied to the bindings on her wrist and she was pulled down to the ground and onto a blanket. Kirren fed a length of rope in between the Amazon's wrists and tied the other end to her belt. She used as few words as possible to explain to the young woman that she better lie down and not dare touch her. "I... um... what if I..." Gabrielle stammered. "What?" Kirren hissed. "Well, I... I tend to move around a lot and I usually end up using whoever I'm sleeping with as a pillow..." "Then you'd better stay awake because if I feel you touch me, I'll cut your hand off!" Kirren spat. "Look, I'm not trying to piss you off here. I'm trying to be honest so I don't get myself killed." Gabrielle said with a shaking voice. She was tired and knew she wouldn't be able to stay awake for the rest of the night. Kirren moved off the bedroll, reaching down and with a grunt lifting the bard to her feet, pushing the young woman to the ground until her back was pressed up against a tree. Gabrielle felt the length of rope go around the tree and attach again to her wrists. "Now, shut up." The woman said, flopping down to her bedroll once more.
"Don't I even get a blan--" Gabrielle's answer was cut short by the blanket that hit her in the face. Carefully maneuvering her bonds, she was able to cover herself with the threadbare blanket. Some time had gone by and Gabrielle could still not make herself fall asleep. She knew she would need her strength, but all she could think of was how much her heart ached for her warrior. For the first time since the ordeal began, Gabrielle allowed herself to give in to the tears that had threatened all evening. She prayed to any Gods that would listen to watch over her warrior and protect her. The young queen sat cross-legged and tucked her feet up under her, beginning a simple meditation, one that had always relaxed her in the past. Xena taught her that the goal was to clear your mind of all thoughts, but as the bard drifted closer to that elusive, peaceful state, all her thoughts... all that she was, turned to the woman who held her heart... * * *
"Xena..." The whisper came to her as light as the gentlest of caresses. "Gabrielle?" The warrior's mind questioned. "Xena... I don't think I can make this last very long, I'm not even sure how I'm doing it in the first place." The bard's faint voice came to her as a dream and Xena closed her eyes tightly. The corners of her mouth curled upward as she was rewarded with the vision she hoped for. Gabrielle stood before her, wisps of honey-colored hair being lifted by an unseen breeze, the sun reflecting its brilliance in her emerald eyes. This was the image that always filled the warrior's mind when she thought of her bard. Xena's favorite part of the vision was the way her own image was
always reflected back to her from within the emerald green depths. "Gabrielle..." Xena advanced. "No, Xena! If you touch me I know I won't be able to hold on to this." "Gabrielle, where are you? Has she hurt you?" Muscles clenched in the warrior's jaw at the thought of her bard being subjected to Kirren's cruelty. A brutality meant for the warrior. "Xena... it feels as if we've traveled forever... she's pushing the horses very fast. I can't see anything... she has me blindfolded, but I know we're going up some pretty steep hills." The bard's lips trembled as she fought her emotions for control. "Gabrielle..." Xena's strong voice brought her back to the moment. "I'll find you... there is nowhere Kirren can hide you from me," she hissed, her long fingers wrapping themselves into fists at her side. "But... she's taking me so far, Xena... She finally lost the control she had been fighting for and lowered her head, silent tears caressing her cheeks. She slowly lifted her eyes to have tear filled emerald green meet sapphire blue. The same tears glistened in Xena's eyes. "Gabrielle..." The vision of Gabrielle started to shimmer and Xena closed her eyes tighter, hot tears slipping from the closed lids, willing the bard back to her. "Don't give up, Gabrielle, I never will... I'll find you!" Gabrielle choked back a sob, "Xena... it feels like we'll never be together again..." Xena quickly closed the distance between the two of them and wrapped the bard in her arms. She held to her fiercely as the young woman's sobs shook her small frame. Xena pressed her lips to the golden locks and breathed in the scent of Gabrielle, the smell of sandalwood and summer rain. The warrior slipped her hand under Gabrielle's chin and tilted her face
upwards till their eyes were locked. Xena placed the palm of her hand over the pendant. "Brie, I'm always with you... right here." Pressing her lips gently to the soft, full ones of her lover, Xena then moved to lean her cheek against the bard's forehead, stroking her lover's soft hair with her fingers. "Don't give in to the despair, love, that's what she wants." All too soon the embrace was broken as Gabrielle looked up into Xena face. As always, the taller woman's beauty stunned her and she felt her grasp on the dream state she entered, fading. She took a step back to take in the beautiful warrior and slowly reached her hand out to her. Her voice was filled with defeat, "I love you, Xe, but I'm afraid you won't be able to find me... she's taken me so far..." "Gabrielle," Xena said tenderly as she reached out her hand to the younger woman. Their fingertips brushed together and multicolored sparks shimmered in the air, Gabrielle's image fading before her eyes, "I love you too, Brie... remember, there's no place that far, my love..." * * *
Gabrielle began the morning with a sense of renewed hope. Her dreamscape encounter with her lover had filled her with a sense of peace once again. They rode at the same pace as the previous day until the bard guessed it was late afternoon. The horses were brought to a halt and the young woman unceremoniously dumped to the ground. Gabrielle was getting good at tucking and rolling as soon as she hit the ground. As soon as the horse beneath her would come to a stop and she felt the tall rider behind her dismount, she would brace herself for a fall.
Slowly chewing the stale bread that was placed in her hands, she could feel quite a bit of activity around her as it sounded like riders had just made their way into the camp. "It's about time you got here," Kirren bellowed. "Now you can take care of the brat!" Gabrielle was surprised as she was quickly hoisted to her feet and thrust into a very solid body. Her hands, which had braced her body for an impact, felt the hard leather and metal of armor. A leather gloved hand reached out and almost gently lifted her chin. Although Gabrielle still wore her blindfold, the warrior wearing the armor must have been taller than Xena, as the bard felt her neck craned upward. "What is your name?" The armor clad figure asked. "G--Gabrielle," she replied. The young Queen had been surprised to hear the gentle voice of a woman come from the figure looming above her. "My name is Devlin. I'm sorry we must meet under these circumstances." "Not half as sorry as I am," Gabrielle blurted out before thinking. Devlin chuckled at the small blonde's statement. So young and innocent, but her features belied a pride and a nobility that Devlin had seen in Amazon women before. "Sit over here." The warrior carefully helped the bard to the ground. "Have you eaten?" "I had a piece of bread in my hand, but I lost it during our introduction." The bard said. Again the warrior chuckled and placed a cloth bundle in the smaller woman's lap, carefully opening the edges, Devlin took Gabrielle's smaller hand and placed it on the food inside. "Cheese... meat... olives," she said as she let Gabrielle's fingers touch
each of the offerings in her lap. "Are you thirsty?" The warrior asked. When Gabrielle nodded, she felt a waterskin placed at her feet. "Eat and get some rest, we'll be travelling through the night from here on in. If you need anything or if anyone bothers you, call my name." "Devlin," Gabrielle said. "Yes?" The warrior questioned. "Just testing," The bard said, feeling her hunger return with a vengeance at the first bite of food. * * *
"I didn't want anyone else to hear me because frankly I was afraid they'd think I was nuts!" Xena spoke in a hushed tone to the Regent as they rode their horses up the steep, hilly terrain. They had risen before dawn, The Warrior Princess could have sworn Apollo's chariot began it's daily journey through the sky quite a bit earlier than any other morning, but that could have just been her own wishing. As the first rays of light made there way to the forest floor, the Amazon warriors started to comb the ground for signs of riders or Gabrielle's elusive beads. "You mean to say Gabrielle actually talked to you... answered you?" Ephiny asked in amazement. "I can't give you any proof, Eph, only that it wasn't a dream, it was as real as you are to me now. She said they were still heading up into the hills and that she hadn't been hurt yet. The best news was that Kirren had her blindfolded."
The Regent caught on quickly. "Why would you blindfold someone you're going to kill later?" "Right!" Xena replied, excitedly. "It only makes sense to blindfold someone if you're going to let them go so they can't return to your hideout." "Our big problem right now is that they have a heck of a lead on us and they know where they're going, we don't. We might be able to catch a break if Gabrielle can leave some more signs." The warrior finished. As if on cue, Kesta came barreling down the slope farther to their right. As she neared Xena and the Regent, she held her hand aloft, showing off her prize. "We're on the wrong path... I found one of the beads!" The Amazon shouted. The warriors pulled up and cursed the delay, but thanked Artemis for their good fortune. Finally finding the path Gabrielle had obviously taken, they began finding beads spaced out every quarter of a league or so. They came to a flat open area nestled in the hills; the trampled space told the warriors that this was where Gabrielle's captors had spent the night. Continuing their ascent up the mountain slope, the group found two more of the bard's beads. The pace Xena and the Amazons had been keeping was relentless. As they began to close in the captors, Xena began to worry more about Gabrielle. The warrior knew that if they came bursting through the underbrush on horseback, the first thing Kirren would do is slit Gabrielle's throat... she would have nothing to lose by not doing it. Please Artemis...
she's your chosen. Keep Gabrielle safe. * * *
"Do you need anything else?" Devlin's warm voice asked the young Queen. "Um... a trip to the bushes would be nice." Gabrielle said, not knowing why she was suddenly becoming embarrassed at this point. Devlin guided the woman by her elbow, careful to lead her around the fallen trees. After they had walked a sufficient distance from the camp, the warrior reached over to untie both her wrists. Gabrielle delighted in the freedom and rotated and massaged the joints to get the blood flowing again. The warrior made no move to remove the blindfold and Gabrielle assumed that rule was still in effect. She was surprised however when the warrior led her into the forest instead of dumping her at the side of the road as Kirren had done. "I'm going to turn around so you can have a little privacy, Gabrielle. I know it's not much and I apologize, but I need to make you aware of two things. If I let you escape, I forfeit my life to Kirren..." "And, the other thing?" Gabrielle asked, surprised by the warrior's apparent honesty. She could feel the tall warrior leaning in toward her. Grasping the bard's hands in her own strong grasp Devlin pulled the bard against her till the young woman could feel the warrior's breath on her ear. "I have extremely good hearing... don't do anything foolish." Devlin returned. Gabrielle's skin broke out in goose bumps at the tone of the warrior's voice. It was very nearly a whisper, but still strong and commanding. She's
not a nut case like Kirren, but I bet she'd still cut me down where I stand. Gabrielle nodded her understanding and felt the warrior turn away, hearing Devlin's footsteps stop a short distance away. She wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth, but she wondered about the woman who was as
gentle with her as her own warrior, but obviously worked for a cruel, sadistic woman. * * *
When Gabrielle was led back to their camp she could hear the snoring sound of men asleep. They had ridden hard and were now taking a short nap before traveling through the night. Gabrielle was exhausted herself and quickly fell asleep on the blanket Devlin had provided. Feeling as though she had just closed her eyes, the bard woke to a thunderous grinding sound. It felt as if the ground were shaking beneath her as she wondered if they were in the middle of an earthquake. "Devlin?" she called out. "I'm right here, Gabrielle. It's nothing to be frightened of, don't worry." The warrior answered. "What is that noise?" The bard asked. "Gabrielle, it would probably be best if you didn't ask any questions from here on. Come on," the warrior said as she guided the bard to her feet and helped her mount a horse that seemed much further off the ground than Kirren's mount was. The party moved out and Gabrielle felt a cool dampness on her skin. The ground they traveled across seemed flatter than the hilly slopes they'd been riding up and down. The bard had actually begun to grow accustomed to not having her site. She seemed to hear so much more now. The beat of the horses hooves sounded like it was being echoed around them, and the faraway drip of water seemed to tell the bard they were in some sort of cave. Gabrielle could even hear the creak of leather coming from the warrior's armor, behind her.
She had slept so little in the last couple days; her mind started to grow fuzzy. She began to worry that she had no other way to leave a trail for Xena to follow since she had used up all the beads on the bracelet. As her thoughts carried her toward the comfortable feeling of her warrior's strong arms around her, she drifted off to sleep. * * *
"I don't understand it," Ephiny said for perhaps the third time. The Regent indicated the trampled area where the captors had obviously made camp, along with the numerous horse tracks that littered the area. They were fast losing the light of the day, but it looked like all signs of the party simply vanished. Scouts had circled the area again and again, but were unable to pick up any additional tracks. It was if the group had flown away entirely. "It has to be intervention from a God, then." Eponin said. "But, Gabrielle is Artemis' chosen... what God would be foolish enough to go against her?" Xena's skin crawled with the knowledge. "There's only one God I know who would be that arrogant. Ares..." The warrior drawled out. A spark of light grabbed the Amazons attention and in another instant they were looking at the God of War himself. "Ah, Xena... I knew you'd call for me sooner or later." Ares said as he stared appreciatively at the warrior. "I wasn't calling you at all, Ares. What have you done with Gabrielle?" Xena asked. "Me?" The God asked innocently, "I haven't touched her." He finished
smugly. "Then it's one of your little followers. You put Kirren up to this, didn't you... Why?" "Xena... aren't you forgetting, my dear. Kirren is one of your little followers, not mine." A flicker of pain crossed Xena's face as she thought about the implications of the statement. "Where are they going, Ares?" Xena asked in a steady, even voice. "Hmmm, let's see... I really don't know, but I suppose I could make a few inquiries on the irritating little blonde's behalf. It'll cost you, though, Xena." He whispered over her shoulder. Ephiny watched as the God of War came up behind Xena, stroking her arm tenderly. The Regent also saw the warrior's muscles jump at the God's touch. Ares dropped his voice until it was a low, seductive whisper. "You know what I want in return, Xena. I want you by my side once again. I'll give you an army of your own and you can demand exactly the kind of revenge you want against Kirren. You know you want to. After all, she's got your beloved Gabrielle, doesn't she?" Again the pain visibly washed across the warrior's features. "Give it up, Ares... it's never going to happen." Xena said firmly. "Oh, really? Even if I could deliver little Gabrielle into your arms this very minute... now, wouldn't that be worth it? Wouldn't you join me for the sake of the woman you say you love" Ares purred the words into Xena's ear. The warrior's brow furrowed together at the battle going inside her brain. Wouldn't she do anything to save Gabrielle's life, even die for her?
"Dying is easy, warrior... would you live for her?"
Hecuba's admonition came back to her.
"I think, if there was no other way... if it would save Gabrielle's life... or if it would keep her from harm..." a sharp stab of pain clutched at Xena's heart as she said the words. "Yes... I think if it would keep her safe... I would leave her." The words passed through the warrior's head and she felt the pain again as it clutched at her heart. Did she love Gabrielle enough to do this for her... give up to Ares?
"Love is an emotion, Xena, and it can fool you ... Love can be used against you, to trick you into giving up everything you hold dear. You will only end up hurting yourself, the one you love, and even others around you," Xena looked up into Ephiny's eyes. The Regent stood there waiting to hear Xena's answer to the God of War; her hand involuntarily went to the hilt of the sword at her waist. Ephiny held her breath, silently praying she would not have to carry out the promise she had made to the warrior the night before. Xena smiled the same bittersweet smile that Ephiny has seen on the woman's face last night. It was easy to tell the dark-haired warrior thought of only one thing. "No deal, Ares," Xena said the words as she looked into the Regent's eyes. "What?!" Ares bellowed. "Do you know what you're refusing?" "Yes, Ares, I do. If I say no to you there's every chance that Gabrielle may die, but if I join you it will kill her just as surely as any blade would, maybe not all at once, but a little bit every day, until the inevitable happens." Ares face began to turn red in his anger as he leaned close to the Warrior
Princes, but spoke loud enough to be heard by the rest of the Amazons. "Just remember this, Xena... if you say no to me, she'll still die a little at a time, I can guarantee you that. I'll let that psycho bitch torture your precious Gabrielle, one drop of blood at a time until you won't even recognize the body that's left!" Tears streaked the warrior's face as Ares left a burst of smoke and flame in his wake as he transported himself away. Sinking slowly to one knee, Xena shook her head. "Eph... what have I done?" "Something Gabrielle would be proud of," The Regent answered. * * *
Gabrielle felt her body jerk forward as she woke and Devlin's protective hand reached out to steady her. Suddenly the ground beneath the horse's hooves changed from the solid sound of the ground to the click that their shoes made on brick. The bard soon found herself being helped down from the huge mount and being led through a number of stairwells and hallways. The sounds around her were reminiscent of the castles she had been in, but she knew of no fortresses up in the northern hills. "She's your problem while she's here," the bard heard Kirren say. "Make sure she doesn't get into trouble... or you know who pays the price, don't you, Devlin?" "Yes, mistress," Devlin's stiff voice answered. Kirren turned to the warrior. "How is it Devlin that that you're the only one around here that can make 'yes, mistress' always sound like fuck you?" Kirren asked.
"I don't know, mistress," the warrior answered, a hint of amusement in the tone of her voice. "You'll have to head back out immediately... that damned warrior tracked us faster than I thought." Kirren's voice went on, ignoring the warrior's comment.
She always manages to sound like she's pissed off at somebody, Gabrielle thought to herself. Devlin silently led Gabrielle along more halls, carefully guiding her through a door that the warrior shut behind them. Devlin began to untie the bard's wrists, tossing the rope away. "Close your eyes and only open them a little at a time until they become used to the light." Devlin instructed. Gabrielle felt the blindfold being lifted off her eyes and did as she was instructed. "Wow, that feels better, thanks," she said to the warrior's back. Devlin turned toward the bard and Gabrielle couldn't help staring. The warrior was slightly taller than Xena with broad shoulders and muscular arms. She wore a sword strapped to her back and leather and brass covered her chest, abdomen, back, and shoulders. A chain mail cape was attached to her shoulder protectors, thick bracers covered both forearms, and she wore one leather glove, presumably on her sword hand. She wore a white shirt under her armor and brown brushed leather pants, that tucked into knee high boots. The warrior ran her fingers through her sun bleached locks a little self consciously under Gabrielle's frank gaze. It wasn't the warrior's closecropped hair that Gabrielle stared at, but her eyes. The color of blue cornflowers, of her own lover's eyes, stared back at the bard. A pounding on the door interrupted the two women.
"Enter," the warrior said cautiously. A young woman of perhaps fifteen summers entered the room. "Good, Lara... this is Gabrielle." The young girl gave a tentative smile in Gabrielle's direction. "She needs a hot bath and a good dinner. Can you take care of that for me?" The young girl nodded her head. Devlin was busy throwing some things into a small leather bag as she talked. "And, let Attius bring it all down here. I don't want you coming into this end of the castle without me here, allright?" Again the girl nodded her head and hurried out the door. "Are these your quarters?" Gabrielle asked as she looked around at the comfortable surroundings. "Yes, you should find it suitable for your stay, though." Another knock and a soldier Gabrielle recognized from the group that had kidnapped her entered the room. "The mistress wants you to bring the Amazon to the map room." He repeated Kirren's order. "We're right behind you," Devlin answered. Devlin and Gabrielle followed along behind the soldier and the warrior leaned over to whisper in the bard's ear. "Remember, Gabrielle... Kirren isn't a woman to be fooled with. If you want to go on to live a long life, do what she says immediately and without question. Can you handle that?" Gabrielle searched the blue eyes that held her own and silently nodded her
head. "Long time, no see... sit" Kirren commanded as soon as Gabrielle stepped into the room. Kirren indicated a seat at a table where a parchment, ink, and a quill had been laid out. Gabrielle did as ordered and looked from Kirren to Devlin, watching the way the blue-eyed warrior's jaw clenched in anger when she thought Kirren wasn't watching her. "You are going to write a little note to your Warrior Princess. As you can see I've already added the particulars about how she and I will meet on the battlefield, one fortnight from today. What's going to get her here is knowing the fact that you are alive and well. So do your little bard thing and write a brief message telling her you're safe." Gabrielle made a move to pick up the quill and felt her wrist locked in Kirren's iron grip. "Don't even think about sending any kind of a hidden message, your highness, or I'll know!" Kirren whispered. Gabrielle felt like writing Dear Mother, Athens is nice, wish you were here, but the bard remembered Devlin's warning and didn't think Kirren would get the joke. She'd probably just plunge the quill into my heart. I bet
Devlin would get it, though. At that thought the bard looked up to find Devlin watching her with a face as impassive as ever, but her blue eyes smiled as if she could read the bard's thoughts. Kirren's voice made the bard jump. "It doesn't have to be fucking Socrates, just tell her you're allright!" Gabrielle tried to be as succinct as possible. She believed what Kirren told her about hidden messages, but she was a bard after all and could make a market list sound like high drama. The bard could only pray to Artemis that Xena had a good memory. She handed the parchment to Kirren and the
tall woman read it over and over. "Looks safe enough. Do you have a ring or a signet with you... something with your seal on?" Kirren questioned. Gabrielle thought for a second and held her pendant up. Rolling the parchment up, Kirren tilted a candle until the warm wax dripped onto the scroll. Holding it out for the bard, Gabrielle pressed the hearts into the pliable wax. "Signed and sealed," Kirren said as she handed it to Devlin, who took the note and carefully placed it inside the leather across her chest. "Come, on, Gabrielle... I'll take you back downstairs." Devlin said, motioning for the bard to rise. "Guard!" Kirren shouted. "Take her back," she motioned to the soldier who leered openly at Gabrielle, then to Devlin she continued. "I need to go over something with you." The blue-eyed warrior frowned as Gabrielle was led away. * * *
Devlin quickly made her way through the hidden passages of the castle, arriving at the open door to her quarters just in time to see one soldier holding Gabrielle's arms behind her back as the other prepared to rip her top from her body. His eye caught the large pendant and he moved to grab the prize. A searing pain came from the piece of jewelry and shot into his hand. "It burned me," he howled in pain. The other soldier roughly turned Gabrielle's body to face him and made a grab for the piece. He jerked back with the same reaction as soon as he
touched the pendant, blisters popping up on the tips of his fingers. "I think she's a witch," Devlin said casually walking into the room. The three turned to look at the warrior, Gabrielle still slightly unnerved by the soldiers reactions to her pendant, and the soldiers moving behind Devlin as if for protection. The warrior turned toward the first soldier and looked at his fingers with concern. "I've seen them shrivel up and fall over from this kind of magic." Devlin said. "Actually... I wouldn't be surprised if something else didn't shrivel up and drop off," she finished looking at the soldier's crotch. A look like terror planted itself on both men's faces as they bolted for the door. Devlin chuckled at the sight and asked Gabrielle if she was allright. "You aren't a witch... are you?" she said with a slight grin. "No! I can't understand... I mean I have no idea what happened. Xena gave me this necklace." "Maybe she put a spell on it?" The warrior said thoughtfully. Gabrielle smiled at the thought. "Want to let me in on the joke?" Devlin said, bending down slightly to make eye contact with the bard. "She put a spell on me allright, but not like you might be thinking." Gabrielle confessed with a blush. Devlin watched the young woman and a feeling of envy stole over her. She envied this Xena, a warrior she had never met, and her ability to capture the heart of a woman such as Gabrielle. "Well, I'm off to meet with this warrior of yours." Devlin lowered her voice to
a whisper, "Do you have a message for her?" A thousand words ran through the bard's mind, but as she reached the palm of her hand up to cover the pendant on her chest, she chose only four, "she holds my heart. Please, tell her that she holds my heart." Another twinge of envy shot through the warrior as she nodded her head and pulled a key from a pouch at her waist. "Keep this main door locked, although I don't think any more of the soldiers will be bothering you," she said with a smile. "By the way, what does this warrior who holds your heart look like?" "Tall, beautiful, piercing blue eyes," Gabrielle said, blushing slightly as she looked up into the blue gaze of Devlin's stare. Moving to open the door at the sound of a knock, Devlin allowed a man into the room, two buckets of steaming water in his hands. Walking to the back of the room, the warrior pulled the curtains apart that separated the bathing area from the rest of the room. The older man seemed to possess an unseen strength as he easily dumped the contents of each bucket into a large wooden tub. "Gabrielle, this is Attius... if you need anything at all, just ask him. He'll come down a few times a day to bring you food and check on you. Attius, my friend... this is just between us, eh? We wouldn't want the mistress to find out, would we?" The warrior flashed a charming smile and Gabrielle wondered how many other workers in the castle defied Kirren's wishes for a glimpse of the blueeyed warrior's smile. "I'll be gone the better part of two days, Gabrielle. Please, your highness," Devlin added with a small grin, "try to stay out of trouble." Gabrielle thought of her own blue-eyed warrior, and how often Xena had said those very words to her, the bard's heart ached to see her even as Devlin quietly closed the door.
* * *
The Amazon scouts had spent the last day and a half traveling for leagues in every direction. Xena even began retracing their route; second-guessing the beads they thought had been a sign from the young Queen. It was midday, and the Warrior Princess rode into the Amazon camp at the base of the huge cliff. At the bottom of the solid face of rock had been where they last saw the tracks made by Gabrielle's captors. The rest of the group argued that since Ares was obviously a part of Gabrielle's abduction; he could have just transported the whole group to some, unknown to them, destination. Xena had to explain that wasn't the way the God of War operated. Even to get her back. Transporting individuals, yes, but she had never heard of whole groups of people at a time. Two Amazons rode up just as Xena dismounted, fatigue showing in the way the warrior carried herself. She pulled Argo's saddle off and let the horse graze the area, the mare deserving a rest. "Riders approaching, warrior," the scouts shouted in Xena's direction. "They carry a flag of truce." Xena jumped up just as a blonde haired warrior, flanked by two of Kirren's soldiers, rode into their camp. Ephiny saw the look in Xena's eyes and she went to the warrior's side. "Xena, let's at least hear them out." The Regent said. Devlin would have known the Warrior Princess without Gabrielle's description. Xena stood a head taller than any of the Amazons around her, and she was indeed beautiful. If the stories about her were true, however, Devlin had to wonder what it was about the woman that was capable of holding on to a heart as pure as Gabrielle's.
"You are the Warrior Princess?" Devlin asked. She hadn't bothered with an answer before continuing, which was good considering Xena wasn't answering. "Here's my show of good faith," Devlin finished, tossing Gabrielle's sealed parchment toward the warrior. Xena caught the parchment, never releasing the mounted rider's gaze. The warrior prided herself in being able to judge someone's heart simply by looking into their eyes. What Xena saw surprised her. She saw no malice or evil in the eyes the color of her own. Finally looking down at the scroll in her hand, Xena tenderly drew a finger across the wax seal. Gabrielle's pendant had been used; it's indentation staring back up at the warrior. Breaking open the seal, Xena read the words from Kirren and a small note at the bottom in Gabrielle's own handwriting. Devlin relaxed slightly as Xena read the note. The blond warrior barely turned her head as Xena handed the scroll to an Amazon standing next to her. Too quick for Devlin to stop her, Xena jumped up and jabbed her fingers into the warrior's neck. Devlin felt her muscles go weak, falling from her horse, as she struggled to pull air into her lungs. "I've just cut off the flow of blood to your brain... another thirty seconds and you'll be dead. Tell me why I shouldn't just kill you right here?" Devlin squeezed her eyes shut and tried to focus. Kirren had told her about this particular ability of the warrior's, but nothing could have prepared her for the feel of imminent death such as this. "If... I don't... come back... Gab... ri... elle... is dead." Devlin rasped. Xena seemed torn, but once again jabbed at the warrior's neck and Devlin sucked in a huge mouthful of air. Wiping the blood from her nose the warrior sank the rest of the way to her knees, trying to compose herself. "Why in a fortnight?" Ephiny asked Devlin.
"It should take you that long to get to the arranged meeting spot," Devlin said hoarsely. "Then how is it Kirren will kill Gabrielle if you don't make it back?" Xena asked without looking at the kneeling warrior. "I didn't say we were keeping Gabrielle at the meeting spot... only that Kirren wants to fight you there." "Why there, then?" Ephiny questioned again. This time Xena answered. "Because it's where I defeated her the first time." Devlin nodded her head with a sad smile. Mounting her horse once again, Devlin looked back at the warrior. "Don't follow me... any deviation from the instructions will end in your Queen's death, and I think we both know, warrior, that it will not be a quick death." Devlin turned her horse and ordered the soldiers to move out ahead of her. The two men rode ahead and Devlin very quickly leaned down from her saddle and spoke to Xena. "I have a personal message from Gabrielle... she says that you hold her heart, Xena. Is there an answer?" Devlin's eyes darted toward the two soldiers who rode on ahead of her; still Xena could see no sign of betrayal in the blond warrior's sparkling eyes. Something akin to jealousy quickly passed through Xena's mind as she thought of this warrior with eyes as blue as her own, delivering her message. "Tell her if I hold her heart, then she belongs to me... and. I'll let no one take what is mine!" Xena growled the last part of the message. "I have a feeling she already knows that, warrior, but I'll tell her just the same." Devlin smiled and turned her mount away, confident that she would not be followed.
PART III
THEIR OPTIONS WERE dwindling in a hurry. The group could simply start on their way inland, according to Kirren's instructions and Xena could battle Kirren. Ephiny reminded Xena that the former assassin wouldn't be challenging the Warrior Princess unless she were fairly confident she had the ability to beat her. And, they still had Ares to contend with, so they were pretty sure this wouldn't be a fair fight. The way Xena left it with Ares, it was a sure bet he wasn't just going to let the warrior walk off with Gabrielle once she defeated Kirren. The only thing they could do was to hope to find Gabrielle before the match and rescue her from where ever Kirren's stronghold was. Xena was convinced Gabrielle would have hidden some kind of message as to where to find her, in the scroll. Of course, Kirren would read it so it had to be part of the bard's message. "Gabrielle is smart that way... she'd find some way." Xena said. They had spent nearly two candlemarks, Eponin, Ephiny, and Xena, all trying to decipher what the bard might have meant in her note to Xena. "Okay she tells you she's okay and Kirren hasn't hurt her... nothing much there. What about this last line... I haven't been this nervous since the day I entered Academy in Athens?" Eponin asked. "That must be it... it's the only line that means something to you and nobody else," Ephiny added. Xena looked at the parchment as if she could gather her memory from the
bard's handwriting. "It must mean something because I don't remember her being nervous. I mean, she was excited; we were a little sad at separating.
Just a little sad, warrior? Do you remember the feeling in the pit of your stomach when she said she'd be away four or five years? "Gabrielle told me about the competition at the Academy," Ephiny smiled, remembering the time Gabrielle had confessed that she had to lie to get enrolled in the first place. "If I remember, she said you went off to fight a Cyclops in a neighboring town and she went to the Academy." Xena looked up at the two Amazons. The warrior certainly wasn't used to revealing her feelings to anyone but Gabrielle, especially not feelings that were about Gabrielle. She needed their input, however, if she was going to figure out the riddle that her bard had left her. "Well, the truth is... I guess I was having a little bit of a hard time letting Gabrielle walk out of my life. I kept telling myself I had to let her follow her dreams, but... I didn't tell Gabrielle I was in love with her back then. I wasn't sure what I felt was real." Xena was afraid to look either of the women in the eye. As for Ephiny and Eponin, the two Amazons had never heard Xena string so many words together at one time in their presence. They were awed and honored at the same time. "Xena," Eponin said placing a hand on the warrior's shoulder. We're not here to judge you about the past. Why don't you just tell us the story and see if anything new comes back to you." Xena gave the best effort at a smile she could under the circumstances, and launched into what she could remember. "I look back on it now and remember acting like an idiot. I wanted to tell Gabrielle how much I cared for her, but the best I could do was tell her I thought of her as a sister." Eponin rolled her eyes.
"I thought you weren't going to judge," Xena said. "Sorry," Eponin replied. "Well, I figured I had to let her do what was right for her so I offered to go with her to Athens. We went around with that a little, I think, but I finally talked her into having me travel to the city with her. I think it took us about three days to get there and that was it." "That's it? But, the scroll says the day she entered the Academy. What happened the day you arrived in Athens?" Ephiny interjected. "We didn't actually enter Athens together." Gabrielle, when I get you
home, marry you, and finally have you in my arms safe and sound you are gonna owe me so big for this humiliation. "What, you both went into the city from different directions?" Eponin asked, not following Xena's logic. "Actually, yes." Xena began to fidget uncomfortably. "Gabrielle doesn't think I went into Athens with her," she finally blurted out. "I left her at the gate, but I--I couldn't do it. So, I followed her all over Athens until she won the competition and decided to catch up with me outside Karamos. It's a good thing I had Argo or she would have beaten me there. I did almost blow it when some nutcase attacked one of the instructors... turns out it was all part of the class." Actually forgetting why they were hearing this story, Ephiny laughed gently at the warrior's plight. "Xena, what were you going to do if she'd stayed at the Academy; sneak around behind her for five years?" Xena had temporarily forgotten the reason too as she joined in the other woman's laughter. "To tell you the truth, I hadn't really thought that far ahead." "Okay so let's start back at the day you followed Gabrielle into Athens... start at the beginning of that day and let's see what we've got that Gabrielle
might be pointing us to." Ephiny said. "Allright," Xena began again, wearily. She closed her eyes and tried to visualize their last day together before Gabrielle left. "I figured this was going to be the last time that I'd see her for a while, so I kind of made it her day. We were camped just on the outskirts of Athens. I woke up early and went fishing for breakfast, as usual Gabrielle was still asleep when I got back so I put the fish on a spit and started some sword drills. Gabrielle woke up and we ate breakfast. We puttered around through the morning and we found a stream that had these freshwater crabs that Gabrielle loves. We made a fire, cooked the crabs up and had lunch. I think we went swimming after lunch... yea, because we were lying out on these great big rocks and Gabrielle fell asleep. I went and caught a few of those disgusting eels she likes and we had an early dinner. That evening she was headed into Athens." Nearly half a day had gone by and still the three women tried to decipher the message. "One more time, Xena" Eponin said. "I can't remember anything else. If I keep repeating it I'm afraid I'll start imaging details that didn't happen!" Xena rubbed her fingers against her temples, trying to fight off the headache that hung on the fringes of her awareness. "I just don't remember. Maybe the note doesn't mean anything... maybe I'm just pushing it because I want something to be there that isn't," she said, her voice heavy with defeat. The two Amazons saw a side of Xena that few had ever seen before. Her head hung low as tears of frustration started to form in her eyes. "You know what we're doing, don't you?" Eponin asked with a sudden shake of her head. "We're trying to figure this out as ourselves looking at something Gabrielle gave us. What we should be doing is putting ourselves in Gabrielle's place... think like she thinks." "Good point, Ep. What would Gabrielle write a clue about?" Ephiny asked.
"She'd write about what she knows," Xena said, warming to this new point of view. "What does Gabrielle equate everything in life to?" The warrior asked aloud. "Food!" All three women answered good-naturedly. They laughed at themselves, but Xena's eyes narrowed as she thought about this new turn. It seemed as if the other two women had the same thought at the same time. "Fish for breakfast," Xena said first. "Crab for lunch," Ephiny added. "Eel for dinner." Eponin finished. "She's around fish?" Eponin asked. "No, she smells fish," Ephiny countered. Xena smiled as it all fell into place... how could she have been so blind! "She smells more than fish... she smells the ocean!" The warrior slapped her hands together. "That's my girl! Eph, what's on the other side of this mountain?" "The Aegean, but how would they have gotten there already? It would take 10 days at best to go around this mountain." "It would be faster if you went through the mountain," Xena said, jumping to her feet. "I knew there was something bugging me about those tracks. They didn't just up and disappear. They were all facing toward the cliff. There was an opening and they walked in!" Xena and the Amazons spent the rest of the afternoon and evening on hands and knees, looking for any small piece of twig or rock that was a release for the entrance to the tunnel.
"How do we know it's a trap door thingy and not Ares just opening a hole for them to walk through?" Eponin asked. "Because, Devlin was adamant about us not following her, and if she wasn't back in what sounded like a day or two, Kirren would kill Gabrielle. I think she used another entrance to this tunnel that leads through the mountain and down to the sea. Somehow I don't picture Ares waiting around to be at everybody's beckon call." "What about this Devlin? She didn't exactly seem the type to be working for someone like this Kirren." Ephiny went on. Xena's eyes flashed with jealousy at the mention of Devlin's name. "I don't know what her story is where Kirren's concerned, but it did seem like she was trying to protect Gabrielle," Xena said reluctantly. Xena was abruptly thrown from the rock she had crawled across while grasping at a tree branch that looked old and rotten. The branch had been the lever and a thunderous sound filled the air. The Amazons scattered from the rock face and simply stood staring at the enormous tunnel before them. "Good Gods!" Eponin exclaimed. Xena smiled an evil sort of smile as she turned back to the Regent. "We've got some plans to make." Xena said as she continued to smile. * * *
"Well, I have to say, you feed your captives well around here," Gabrielle said to Devlin, green eyes flashing with laughter. The warrior had arrived back at the castle to find that the bard had taken
her advice and kept a low profile. They had just finished an enormous meal, the tall warrior was amazed at the amount of food the young woman was able to secret away. Devlin looked under the table, a suspicious glint in her eye. "What?" Gabrielle said, finally leaning back in her chair to relax. "Just wondering if you had a dog under there," Devlin deadpanned. Gabrielle's quick laughter attacked Devlin's senses and felt like nothing the warrior had ever experienced before. Again, she thought of the dark-haired warrior and what magic could possibly be invoked to make a heart such as Gabrielle's bind with the heart of a warrior with such a dark past. Gabrielle felt the weight of Devlin's stare and took another sip of her wine, a slow blush spread across her cheeks. She wasn't a stranger to leering looks, but the blue gaze that held her now felt so much like her own warrior's. She thought of Xena and her eyes closed, the corners of her mouth curling upward. "A dinar for your thoughts," the warrior interrupted. Gabrielle abruptly opened her eyes and the warrior watched the blush deepen. "Ah, let me guess," Devlin said, pouring another cup of wine. "Your Warrior Princess." When Gabrielle nodded, the warrior's eyes took on a serious expression. Leaning her elbows on the table to move in closer to the young woman seated across from her, Devlin finally asked the question aloud. "What is it, Gabrielle? What is it that makes a woman like you able to love a warrior whose past is as black as pitch?" Gabrielle didn't know at first whether to be flattered or offended at the warrior's question. She was always flattered when someone thought it was
she who was the special one in her relationship with Xena. Her natural defenses went up, however when someone brought up the past that Xena was trying so hard to redeem herself of. The young Queen looked up into Devlin's azure gaze and suddenly realized the double meaning of the question. She had wondered only briefly at the blonde-haired warrior's own past; at the kind of memories the gentle warrior was tormented by. Now she knew the warrior was not only inquiring as to her relationship with Xena, but also what kind of hope there was for her own heart. "Two bodies, one soul," Gabrielle said as she launched into the tale of Soulmates, for her audience of one. * * *
"We'll have to go on foot," Xena explained, "I don't like the time it will cost us, but we'll be too easy to hear coming through there on horseback." The warrior, along with the Amazon leaders, looked at a map of the terrain between Amphipolis and the Aegean. "If Kirren's stronghold is by the water, then I figure two to three days as the crow flies between this point and the Aegean." Xena finished by pointing to where they were, and across the mountain to the sea. "I'm more concerned with everyone's physical shape. We're going to have to keep up a pretty fast pace in there. Eph, do you think this bunch is in good enough shape? We've been pushing kind of hard the last few days." Xena questioned, noticing the dark circles under the Regent's eyes. Ephiny looked up from the map, a tired but determined look on her face. Suddenly the Regent broke out into a smile, "Well, if we're not... they sure are!" No less that thirty Amazon warriors broke through the clearing, led by
Solari. Ephiny took notice of the astonishment on Xena's face. "I sent for them when we left Amphipolis. I didn't know when they'd get here, but we have our fresh warriors." She finished with a smile. "Then we go in two groups," Xena said, her own heart lifting at the sight of the women. "The freshest warriors first, we'll make better time. Eph, I'll want you to lead the second group." Ephiny saw the logic in the warrior's words and nodded. "As long as you take Eponin and Solari in the first group. I'd feel better that way." Xena nodded and they began to form two groups. The first would start along at a run, Ephiny's group, comprised of the original warriors, would follow at a slower pace, giving them a little time to rest. Xena cautioned the Amazons about noise and demonstrated how she wanted their weapons fastened down so as not to make any clanging sounds as they ran. Torches were lit and the first group stood at the massive entrance to the tunnel. "Well, Ep... got your running boots on?" Xena said with a determined smile. "Five dinars I get there first!" The warrior returned, as they led the way into the dark passage at a quick jog. * * *
Devlin was entranced by the young Queen's ability to tell a tale. She had heard bards all over the known world, but none could compare to the woman seated across from her Suddenly the door to the warrior's quarters flew open and Kirren strode quickly through the entrance. Her eyes flashed angrily as Devlin stood to intercept the woman. Kirren stopped in front of the taller warrior and pulled
her arm back. She hit Devlin across the face with an open handed slap that would have thrown Gabrielle across the room. Devlin, the young Queen noticed, had her hands clenched into fists, her arms seemingly shaking under her control. She whipped her head back toward Kirren, but not before Gabrielle saw the electric blue fire that raged in her eyes. Still, the warrior never raised a hand to the angry woman before her. "You were followed," Kirren spat out. "That is impossible," the warrior said between clenched teeth. "Well, the scouts in the tunnel were attacked by a bunch of Amazons! The one that made it back alive said they were in the main passage, a day away." "They didn't get there by following me," the warrior repeated. Impatiently, Kirren looked around the room and seemed to see Gabrielle for the first time. The young Queen thought about returning the look with a haughty stare of her own, but thought better considering the mood Kirren was in. Gabrielle lowered her eyes, but could still feel the weight of the woman's scrutiny. Looking back at Devlin, Kirren said harshly, "Come with me!" Once outside the door to Devlin's quarters, Kirren slammed the door shut and turned to the warrior. "This speeds everything up. Have the army ready by dawn; we'll leave for the meeting place before they even get here. I want every available soldier to go with us. I'll not only kill Xena, but her precious Amazon friends too!" "You still plan on battling Xena alone, then?" Devlin asked. "Yes," Kirren answered looking as if she were lost in thought. "Except I think I might just want to give her a little more incentive to fight her hardest. We're going to get Xena on that battlefield alone to make the exchange for
her little bard. I want you at the top of the rise with the Amazon brat, far enough away so no one can get to you, but close enough so Xena can see you and Gabrielle. When I give you the signal... I want you to slit her throat." At first Devlin thought she had heard Kirren incorrectly, but then she looked at the woman's face. Kirren's evil grin and the bloodlust in her eye made the warrior's heart go ice cold. Not Gabrielle... please, not this. "But... I thought you said you only wanted the Warrior Princess... you said--" "I changed my mind!" Kirren snapped. "I don't need to remind you, who will pay the price if you disobey me, do I Devlin?" "No, mistress," the warrior answered with a sigh of defeat. * * *
Gabrielle watched as the warrior walked back into the room. Devlin went directly to the table; the two had been seated at earlier, and downed her cup of wine in two gulps. She seated herself rather wearily and ran a tired hand through her short hair. Gabrielle felt her future within the warrior's actions. She wasn't going to comment on what had just transpired, but the young Queen felt she had nothing further to lose. "From what I know of warriors, they don't submit to another's will very easily." Gabrielle commented. "No, as a rule they don't." Devlin said heavily. Gabrielle decided to wade right in. "Then what does Kirren use to control you?" Devlin had suddenly become too tired for games and innuendo. Her mind
strayed to the sleepy little fishing village she grew up in. "She keeps a garrison of soldiers outside my home village of Tarynth. In exchange for ten years of my life, she lets them live. If I refuse or disobey she'll slaughter the entire village. My mother, sisters, my friends... the people I grew up with..." Devlin trailed off. "She plans on killing me, doesn't she?" Gabrielle asked, fearing the answer. Devlin looked into the green depths of Gabrielle's eyes and realized there would be no redemption for her now; not after this. "Yes," the warrior answered. "And, you'll do it?" The young Queen sounded surprised. "What would you have me do, Gabrielle? You, a woman whose heart is filled with a light that soldiers like me can only dream of, what would you have me do? You speak of the greater good. Do I release you in exchange for the fifty lives of my people? Does your life outweigh theirs?" The warrior asked a hint of desperation in her voice. Gabrielle looked at the warrior whose choices in life seemed more than any mortal should have to bear. Once again, Devlin reminded the young woman of her own warrior. Wasn't there a time when Xena had questioned what she had become? When she attempted to break free of the cycle of violence and hate that she felt she was trapped in? What would have happened to Xena if the young bard hadn't entered her life? Was it fair to condemn Devlin when she had no one to trust and believe in her... to love her as Gabrielle had done for her dark-haired warrior? "No, Devlin," Gabrielle looked up at the warrior, tears burning into her own eyes, "I won't have innocent people lose their lives in my place." The warrior continued to stare at the young woman for a long time after that until she rose from her chair and left the room, knowing the action she took would mean another innocent life she would have to pay for.
* * *
"Arrrgghhhh," the soldier gasped as the life began to leave his body. "They're gone..." Xena watched as a thin trickle of blood made it's way from the soldier's nose. Another twenty seconds. "When and where?" Xena asked, not believing the castle was virtually empty. Ten seconds. "Y-Y-Yesterday morning... dawn... to the old... battlefield... please, I-I..." Xena jabbed at the fallen man's neck, releasing the pressure point. Two
seconds to spare. Xena and the other Amazons slumped to the floor in exhaustion. They had run for nearly two straight days to get to Kirren's hidden fortress, only to find that Gabrielle's captors were again a day ahead of them. "We'll wait for Ephiny to catch up," was all Xena said aloud as she leaned her head against the coolness of the brick wall, closing her eyes before tears of anger and frustration could spill out. * * *
Walking through the field sent chills up the bard's spine, even on horseback. The grassy plains were still littered with the bones of dead soldiers; most of their weapons and armor left untouched by mercenaries. When Xena had started out as a Warlord it was her intent to protect her homeland, and after nearly ten years the battlefield still stood as a reminder that the people of Amphipolis would not be conquered easily.
Gabrielle had become resigned to her fate, with the grace and dignity of a Queen, she merely requested some writing supplies from the blonde warrior who still acted as protector. Devlin's tent sat slightly apart from the rest of the encampment, another sign that she would never truly be one of them. Her eyes no longer held the sparkle of amusement when they looked at the bard, but rather the sad determination of a warrior on a slow path toward Tartaurus. Gabrielle stayed in the large tent alone when the warrior was away, spending her hours filling scrolls that Devlin had given her word to see delivered upon the Queen's death. It had become a waiting game now and the whole camp hummed with nervous tension as they awaited the Warrior Princess and her Amazon Army. * * *
Xena led the Amazons along the ridge overlooking the old battlefield. The only thing that this field haunted was the warrior's memories. Xena had not wished to walk among the bones of the Romans she had killed, she preferred to keep her eyes straight ahead and focus on Gabrielle. That task became difficult, however when she saw the tattered battle standard wave in the breeze. It was a hard mark to miss, the black and purple mark of the Destroyer of Nations. So it was, that three candlemarks after the Amazons had set up camp, a rider came forward with instructions for the Warrior Princess. "Xena this is crazy... you can't go alone." Ephiny paced back and forth inside the command tent. "If I don't do everything exactly the way Kirren wants, she'll kill Gabrielle. I think we just need to focus on that right now." Xena said adjusting her armor as she stood.
"And if Ares makes good on his threat to go ahead and kill Gabrielle?" Ephiny asked. Xena's brow furrowed and the blue of her eyes turned cold and pale. "Then there won't be a safe enough place for him to hide from me. I'll track him down until the halls of Mount Olympus run red with his blood!" The warrior hissed between clenched teeth. * * *
There was no other way to get to where Kirren sat astride her horse, soldiers on either flank. Xena made her way through the sprawled out bones of the men she had taken down that day. The warrior raised an eyebrow at Kirren's childish tactics. If Kirren thought she could wage a war of nerves with the Warrior Princess, she was mistaken. "Well, Xena... glad to see you made it. I thought maybe you didn't want your little Amazon very much. Bet it was quite a surprise when you got to the castle and there was nobody home?" She said smirking. Xena simply glared at the woman until she fidgeted uncomfortably in her saddle. Kirren made a motion with her left hand and pointed in the direction of the rise about 200 feet to Xena's left. Devlin and Gabrielle made their way up the hill on horseback. As soon as Gabrielle looked down and saw Xena looking up, the young woman's heart stopped. If this was to be the last vision of her warrior it was fitting. This is how she would always remember her lover. Xena sat astride Argo, her head and back erect as she threw stares filled with intimidation at those around her, a powerful figure in her leather and armor. Looking up to the rise, the Warrior Princess cast an ice blue gaze
up the hill. It was as if the power between the two women was a physical entity, the warrior's cold, and forbidding stare locking on her bard. Then, in only a heartbeat's time, the iciness of the warrior's eyes began to melt. It was as if a fire of enormous proportions burned out of control and the pale blue ice melted into deep azure pools. Gabrielle was lost in the sensations and never felt the small pin prick in the back of her neck. "There's your little Amazon, Xena," Kirren said pulling Xena's focus toward her again. "I'll fight you... let her go," Xena commanded. "Well, there's just one problem with that... I want to fight you at dawn tomorrow and I just don't think I can trust you till then. So here's the deal. Gabrielle gets to walk down that hill to her precious Amazons as long as you give up your weapons and stay here for the night." "This wasn't part of the deal," Xena snapped. "The deal is whatever I say it is!" Kirren shot back. "Now do you want your bard back or do I have her skinned alive right now?" Xena looked around her and weighed her chances against the surrounding soldiers, judging the distance between herself and Gabrielle. "Look Xena... I only want to fight you... no tricks, a fight to the death. I'm certain I'll be victorious, but I give you my word... I won't lay a hand on Gabrielle." Kirren said sincerely. Xena slid from Argo's saddle and hit the mare solidly on the rump; the mount quickly galloping off in the direction she came from. Never taking her eyes off Kirren, the warrior surrender her weapons and allowed the men to tie her solidly to a stone column in the middle of the field. Gabrielle had wanted to scream to Xena that it was all just a trap. Devlin would still kill her, but at least Xena would have a chance at escape. The
bard opened her mouth to speak, but couldn't be sure her mouth even opened. Her tongue felt thick and uncooperative. Her muscles began to feel numb, her legs became rubbery and weak, and if not for Devlin's arm around her waist, she would have sunk to the ground. "Now, that's not so bad is it?" Kirren started to turn her horse away from the immobile warrior. "What about Gabrielle?" Xena reminded. "Oh, yes, your little plaything. We almost forgot about her, didn't we?" Kirren leaned out of her saddle toward the bound warrior, "Here's my way of ensuring that you really do try your damnedest to kill me tomorrow and don't just slack off like you did the last time." Kirren finished and the look in her eye sent a trickle of sweat down the middle of the warrior's back, giving Xena an extremely uncomfortable feeling of foreboding. Kirren raised her hand to her own throat, making an imaginary slicing motion. Xena looked from Kirren, up the rise to Gabrielle. Devlin stood behind Gabrielle, the smaller woman's body pressed against the warrior's. The dagger was already in the blond warrior's hand, her free hand lifting the bard's chin up to expose her delicate neck. It was fast, but the warrior tied to the column saw it slowly and in extreme detail, details that would play over and over again in her nightmares for many years to come. Devlin's hand sliced the blade across Gabrielle's neck and blood flew from the blade of the dagger as the warrior swept her hand away. The front of Gabrielle's chest quickly covered in the red fluid as the bard slumped to the ground in a heap at Devlin's feet. The tortured screams that tore through the air sent the horses skittering around nervously. Xena wished she could stop the gut wrenching sounds, until she realized the screams were her own. The warrior bunched her muscles and pulled with the strength of a dozen men on the ropes that held her. Some of the bonds began to pull loose and the soldiers scurried around the madwoman to secure her with more rope.
"Looks like that ought to guarantee you're good and mad," Kirren said, pulling back in her saddle as the warrior attempted to lunge at her, even though the ropes held the thrashing woman's body securely. "I only promised you that I wouldn't lay a hand on her," Kirren said as she spurred her horse away. * * *
Darkness had fallen; the dark-haired warrior slumped over the ties that held her to the single stone column. She was neither unconscious nor awake; her mind swirled in a haze of pain she had previously thought could never reach such heights. Neither Light nor Dark was capable of filling her soul... there was only emptiness. A stinging slap jerked the warrior's head to one side. "Xena." Vacant eyes opened and focused as an animalistic growl was wrenched from deep within the warrior's chest. Another resounding slap, this time hard enough to rock the warrior's head back against the stone column. Xena strained against her bonds to reach her tormentor, the cause of all her pain. "Good, at least you recognize me," Devlin said to the warrior. "Xena listen to me," the warrior quickly glanced around, stepping over the dead body's of the men responsible for guarding the Warrior Princess through the night. "Gabrielle is not dead." Devlin said slowly, trying to see if the warrior understood her words. "I'm going to free you as a show of good faith, Xena... I prefer you didn't kill me right off. What you saw on that hill was a ruse... Gabrielle is very much alive."
Devlin raised her sword and easily sliced through the ropes that held the woman. Stepping back to prepare herself for an attack from the halfcrazed warrior she watched as Xena dropped to one knee, seemingly in pain. Devlin reached for the fallen warrior and felt Xena's fingers shoot out and close around her throat. The warrior wasn't in any hurry; she slowly tightened her grip until Devlin was on her knees, her free hand clutching at the warrior. "Sh-she's... not... not, dead," Devlin repeated. "Xe-Xena... I still... have... my sword..." Xena looked down and saw the blonde warrior's sword in her hand, dangerously close to Xena's belly, but Devlin hadn't made a move to use it. The mane of raven hair was thrown back as Xena stood, cascading down her shoulders, as she released the warrior below her. "I... I gave... her... emetia," Devlin coughed, slowly standing. Xena's eyes held pain and mistrust, but Devlin continued on. "I sealed her body in a basket myself, Kirren's soldiers should be delivering it to the Amazon camp shortly. Xena didn't need the warrior to explain the effects of emetia to her. A sort of paralyzing substance that slowed the heart down to a point where life was barely sustained. If anyone checked the bard's pulse, she would appear dead. Scant heartbeats earlier Xena's life had felt over, now this warrior was telling her it was a trick. She didn't want to believe, but a small spark full of hope began to burn in the warrior's heart. Devlin pulled herself up on the black gelding and offered a hand toward the Warrior Princess. Xena let the small spark take flame as she reached out and hoisted herself upon the horses back. * * *
The timing had been perfect. Devlin and Xena rode into the Amazon camp just after Kirren's two soldiers deposited their basket in front of a stunned Regent. The soldier's bodies were riddled with Amazon arrows, shot after they told the Regent what the basket contained. The two warriors rode up to Ephiny, Xena vaulting from the horse's back before they had stopped, tearing frantically at the seal on the basket. "Get a healer," Xena shouted to anyone who would listen, "tell her to bring some valeriana root." "Gabrielle," Xena moaned, gently lifting the still body from the basket and cradling her lover in her arms. A sharp intake of breath by Ephiny prompted Devlin's voice. "It's okay... it's not her blood," she said as she handed the kneeling warrior a damp cloth. Xena began to wipe the dried blood off of Gabrielle's neck and chest, lovingly caressing her fingers over the bard's neckline, which in reality hadn't a scratch on it. A young Amazon that Xena had never met knelt on the ground beside the warrior, following Xena's instructions, finally handing her a slice of the musky smelling herb. The warrior put the slice of the root into her mouth, chewing it into a fibrous paste, and carefully spitting the saliva out of her mouth. Cradling the bard's head in her lap, she opened Gabrielle's mouth and inserted the herb between the young woman's cheek and gum, massaging Gabrielle's throat to encourage her to swallow. Heartbeats went by, but to Xena it felt like days. Emetia wasn't a substance to be taken lightly. Every moment longer than necessary under its influence, was one less chance to recover from its body-altering effects.
"Come on, Brie... swallow for me... come on, baby," Xena felt tears running down her face as she held and rocked the young Queen in her arms on the ground in the middle of the Amazon camp. A sudden, convulsive intake of breath wracked the young woman's body and her eyes snapped open, not yet focusing on her surroundings. Quickly the warrior pulled the valeriana root from the bard's mouth. "Gabrielle... Gabrielle?" Xena cradled the young Queen's face in her hands searching for eye contact to assure the warrior that her lover was back. "Xena... Xe?" Gabrielle started and then unsuccessfully choked back a sob as she recognized the woman who held her. Gabrielle sobbed as Xena enveloped her in strong arms and rocked her gently; pressing her body hard against the young woman's, praying this wasn't a dream. Xena looked up into the firelight and caught Devlin's misty gaze. "Thank you," Xena said to the warrior, in a voice hoarse with emotion, "thank you..." It had been an emotionally charged day for warrior and bard, they lay on a pallet inside Xena's tent, the rest of the evening filled with soft touches and promises of love until Morpheus claimed them both. Physical exhaustion lay heavy on both women and they slept without waking, lying so close to their hearts desire. Even in sleep, Xena's arms stayed wrapped protectively around her young lover. * * *
Apollo's chariot was just beginning its flight, bright shafts of sunlight catching the dark-haired woman's armor and reflecting it back toward the sky. Xena stood with her arms folded as she contemplated the scene in
the valley below her. Kirren had over two hundred soldiers preparing for battle on the field where the Destroyer of Nations had pushed Rome back so many seasons ago. This time, like then, the village of Amphipolis was to be the prize. Kirren had not been amused when she found Devlin and Xena both gone. At dawn her screams could be heard from the hill where the warrior now stood. Xena had gone into 'Warlord Mode', as Gabrielle would call it, calculating the odds and developing strategies for a battle where she was seriously outnumbered. They had perhaps 75 Amazons, not counting herself or Gabrielle. She was determined to keep Gabrielle away from the fighting; it had been too close this last time. She guessed from the way Kirren set the battleground she would try to attack the Amazon camp in waves, rather than in one prolonged battle. Short bursts of attack were an advantage to the army with the largest numbers. It gave them time to regroup while some could keep fighting. The smaller army didn't have that luxury. Everyone fought or they rested, there weren't enough fighters to keep both going. Xena tilted her head slightly as she heard the tall warrior dismount. "Good news for a change," Devlin smiled wryly. "There's a man that just rode into camp, said he's your brother Toris. He had about forty men with him from the villages around Amphipolis, all halfway decent with a sword by the look of them." "That is good news," Xena said abruptly, moving past the warrior to make her way back to camp. She hadn't known what to say to the woman who had saved their lives, but asked for nothing in return. She owed this woman her life, but she also saw the way Devlin looked at Gabrielle and a feeling of jealousy rose in her again. "We better finish getting prepared," Xena said stiffly, turning back to Devlin. "It's going to be a long day."
* * *
"Xena, I am fine," Gabrielle argued, much like the warrior expected her to. "Gabrielle, it's not safe, and--" the warrior raised her fingers to the bard's lips to prevent her from responding, "--I'm not just talking about for you, I'm thinking of the warriors who'll fight next to you too. You need a little more time to make sure your body is over the effects of the emetia. You put everyone around you at risk if you're not one hundred percent." Xena appealed with the only argument she knew would stop the bard, the thought of putting others in jeopardy. Gabrielle looked angry, then thoughtful, then raised eyes filled with love at her warrior. "You don't fight fair," she said with a half smile. Xena relaxed a little and allowed herself a smile. Pulling the bard into her embrace, she kissed the top of the young woman's head. "I have to fight dirty with you, love... you're too quick for me... otherwise I'd lose every argument." The warrior explained squeezing the woman tighter. "Besides, with all these youngsters," Xena said referring to the Amazons around them, "I really need you back here. That young healer is still just Sartori's apprentice. I doubt she's ever treated anything worse than a hangnail. I'll need you to help her, Brie." "I really hate it when you make so much sense, you know. It makes it hard to come up with a good argument." Gabrielle said, kissing the warrior's smiling lips. * * *
The first wave of the attack lasted about 3 candlemarks, as it was mostly a test of defense and strategies on the part of the leaders. There were no losses from the Amazon camp, but a number of minor injuries, another reason why short, repeated attacks gave a large army the advantage. Walking around the encampment again, Xena realized she needed to protect this base camp for the sake of the wounded that would eventually fill the tents Ephiny had ordered erected. Showing a number of warriors what she had in mind, Xena stood back and watched as large spiked poles were interlocked to form a fence like structure around the camp. Xena walked into the makeshift infirmary and stopped short as she saw a seated Devlin with blood running down her arm, Gabrielle trying to make the uncooperative warrior sit still. "Gabrielle... it's not that bad," the warrior pleaded. "It may not be, but it needs stitches, and you might as well let me do it while I have time." Gabrielle commanded. Devlin resigned herself to the chair and watched the bard clean the long gash on her forearm, just above the bracer. The young woman's touch was gentle, yet powerful at the same time, and the lightheaded feeling that came over the warrior had, she suspected, little to do with the small amount of blood loss. "Not bad," Devlin remarked, inspecting the small even stitches. "I get a lot of practice," Gabrielle laughed, tenderly cradling the warrior's arm as she began to wrap a bandage around the wound. Xena watched the two and the feeling rose in her again. Gabrielle's eyes sparkled as she laughed with the warrior leaving the dark-haired woman to wonder what had really transpired between the two for so many days. This is ridiculous! Gabrielle would never betray our love. The warrior couldn't get the thought out of her head, however. The familiar way the bard
touched the wounded warrior set Xena's brain racing faster than her common sense. Would Gabrielle be seduced by a gentle speaking warrior with eyes the color of Xena's own? Could Gabrielle have let another woman turn a small spark of desire into a roaring flame? Would she... could she... had she? Gabrielle began to feel the weight of a stare and felt a familiar warmth flood her face. She slowly looked up and ran right into the thoughtful frown of her lover, staring hard at the bard, but seemingly lost in her own thoughts. The young Queen knew exactly what that frown indicated in her warrior. After all, hadn't she carried the same look every time a pretty barmaid lingered a little too long while serving the Warrior Princess a drink? Gabrielle quickly looked back at Devlin, looking at her, and was positive that what affected her warrior was simple jealousy. Xena's gaze remained locked on the bard's, the young woman conveying all she felt within her green eyes. Xena saw it all then. No, Gabrielle would never... could never... she had never. This was the ingredient that had been missing in every relationship the warrior had ever had, before Gabrielle, trust. Trust in their love and in one another. When Xena looked into the young Queen's eyes she saw all of this... trust, love, want, need, and desire. All of this meant only for her and no other. She smiled. The sparkling smile that she reserved only for this beautiful young woman. The smile went straight to the bard's heart. Xena's smile caught Gabrielle off guard, and she felt her body shiver slightly at the range of emotions this woman could make her feel with only a look and a smile. By the Gods, what she does to me. Xena walked over to the two women and Gabrielle easily slipped an arm around the warrior's waist, Xena placing her own across her lover's shoulder. "I know it's a little late, but you two haven't really been properly introduced yet," Gabrielle said squeezing Xena's waist slightly. "Xena of Amphipolis meet Devlin of Tarynth." She said with formality.
The two warriors clasped arms in a friendly gesture. "I owe you a debt," Xena said. "If you ever need anything, and it's in my power to grant it, then all you have to do is ask." Devlin laughed an easy and relaxed laugh. "I just may take you up on that some day, warrior." "You know, now that it's all over, how about telling me how you made it look to everyone like you were cutting my throat?" Gabrielle asked suddenly. "Actually, very easy. I hit you with the emetia a few moments ahead of time so you would hit the ground at the appropriate time. The blood was just a small bladder I filled with pig's blood. I pressed it between my thumb and the blade of the dagger and whoosh." Devlin said making a slicing motion across her own neck. "Pigs blood... lovely," Gabrielle said with a sour look on her face. "I'll never wear that top again!" * * *
Devlin and Xena had finished the last of the defenses to protect the small camp and prepared to once again meet Kirren's forces. "What is it?" Devlin asked. "What is what?" Xena replied as she followed Devlin's gaze behind them to where Gabrielle stood, giving directions and talking to the warriors. "What is it that makes women like that able to love warriors like us?" Devlin asked again. Xena understood the question that came from the tall warrior. Hadn't she
always asked herself the same thing? What could a woman with a heart as pure as goodness itself, possibly see in a warrior whose past was as dark as night. Xena also understood that Devlin asked the question, wondering if the same thing could happen for her. Xena watched as Gabrielle continued to help roll bandages, answering questions, and trying to put peoples minds at ease before the next wave of the battle. She moved from person to person and gave them a little touch or a smile, and Xena knew, that in a million years, she would never be able to answer Devlin's question. "It's a gift from the gods, my friend," Xena said as she watched the young woman who held her very soul, "it's a gift from the Gods." * * *
"Gabrielle," Xena's tone was low and cautioning. "Xena," Gabrielle replied. The young Queen wore bracers and shoulder armor; her staff held in one hand the point on the ground. "Xe, I can't stay back here when I'm healthy and we need every one who can fight out there." Gabrielle said, knowing what Xena would say. "These women would die for me... I need to show them that I would do the same for them." The warrior's brow furrowed together as she tried to come up with something to say to combat the bard's logic, but there was nothing. These women were Gabrielle's people, subjects that had willingly crossed many miles, who were preparing to face death on the battlefield all for the love of their Queen. Could Xena ask her bard to be less than she was? Would Gabrielle ask it of her? Taking her lover's face in her hands, she caressed the young woman's
cheeks with her thumbs, pulling her in for a kiss that would show this young woman all that was in her warrior's heart. "I just get afraid for you... I don't know what I would do if I lost you, Brie." Xena whispered in the bard's ear. "I know, love... I feel the same way every time you end up fighting. This is something we have to do and pray that Artemis watches over us. I promise I won't take stupid chances and I won't fight on the front line" Gabrielle replied. Tenderly kissing the young Queen's forehead, the warrior again whispered, "I love you, my bard." "And I you, my warrior... be safe." Gabrielle said as she kissed the palm of the warrior's hand. "They're coming!" The warriors on the point shouted as the first lines swept into the noisy battlefield. * * *
"Ayah!" Xena grunted as another of Kirren's soldiers went down in front of her, his belly sliced open despite the leather armor. The warrior was knee deep in the fray unable to spare even a moment to search the field for her bard. "Ayiyiyiyiyiyiyiy," Xena shouted her battle cry, somersaulting and turning to land behind three soldiers that looked around as if she'd taken flight and disappeared. It was then that Xena caught a glimpse of Gabrielle, her staff flying through the air, she hit two soldiers with an uppercut at the same time. The warrior breathed a sigh of relief, if such an act is possible in the middle of a battle, when she saw Devlin at Gabrielle's back, a long sword and a short blade in her hands, cutting through the limbs of screaming
soldiers in an untiring frenzy. Xena dispatched two more soldiers with one blade stroke and threw her chakram, hearing it slice through the ax handle that was about to come down on one Amazon warrior's back. The Amazon plunged her blade into the gut of the soldier behind her without even looking, giving Xena a smile of thanks. Ephiny and two members of the Royal Guard surrounded their Queen, but even as Xena glanced up, one of the guards fell to her death, an arrow through her heart. Xena tried to work her way closer to her bard, but for every soldier she cut down, two more took their place. Finally the pace began to slow and Xena could see the soldiers in the valley below beginning to drag wounded backward in a retreat. "Gabrielle!" Ephiny screamed, trying to pull the Queen out of the path of the arrow that seemed to be headed straight for the young woman. Ephiny yanked hard on Gabrielle's arm and lost her footing on the slick, blood covered grass; the Amazon fell to the ground, pulling Gabrielle down on top of her. The arrow sailed past where the bard was just standing as Devlin turned her head to help the Queen. The shaft of the arrow buried itself in the warrior's neck as she sank to her knees. By the time Xena was able to turn, all she saw was the tall warrior clutching her throat, her body falling the rest of the way to the ground. "NOOOOO!" Gabrielle screamed, crawling to where the blonde warrior lay, eyes closed tight against the pain. Xena dropped to the ground next to the fallen warrior, her hands quickly examining the arrow in Devlin's neck. "Xe... help her," Gabrielle sobbed. Xena's eyes met Devlin's. An understanding was passed and Xena could see the blonde warrior nod slightly. She had to be sure this was what
Devlin wanted... she needed Gabrielle to know. "Dev, can you understand what I'm saying?" Xena asked. "Yes," The warrior nodded, wincing at the pain of having to speak. Devlin raised a weak hand as if to pull the arrow from her neck. She grabbed Xena's hand and pulled the dark-haired warrior's hand up to the arrow. "Dev, you know where the arrow is... it's in your jugular." Xena took a deep breath and looked at Gabrielle with the warrior's head in her lap, before she continued. "If I leave the arrow in, you'll slowly bleed to death... it'll take a while... I can't fix this," Xena's voice broke as she explained. "If I pull it out... it'll be over in a few minutes at the most." Xena finished. Devlin closed her eyes and gripped the warrior's hand tightly, pulling Xena's face to within inches of the injured warrior's. Painfully the blondehaired warrior whispered to Xena and the dark-haired woman looked up at Gabrielle. Unshed tears filled Xena's eyes as she looked at her bard. "She wants to call in the debt I owe her," Xena repeated Devlin's words to Gabrielle. "She wants you to hold her when she dies." Gabrielle's sobs grew stronger as she drew questioning eyes to her own warrior. Xena nodded and helped ease the fallen woman into the bard's arms. Bracing one hand against Devlin's shoulder, Xena wiped her hands clean on a piece of cloth Ephiny handed her. Placing her fingers around the shaft of the arrow, Xena looked into the eyes of the woman who had given so much for her. Devlin put on a lopsided grin just as Xena pulled with all her strength, and in one swift motion, the arrow was free. Blood spurted forcefully from the jagged wound, saturating the people and the ground surrounding the fallen warrior. Xena let the tears fall down her own face as she gripped the warrior's hand. How could she refuse this last dying request from a warrior who had
given up everything to return Xena's whole life? To be held in Gabrielle's arms, the young Amazon Queen, Devlin had fallen so much in love with. Wouldn't it be what Xena herself would desire? "Nooo," Gabrielle moaned, placing her hand over the wound, pressing down hard against the warrior's neck. Blood continued to rush through the bard's fingers. Devlin reached up a weak hand and pulled Gabrielle's hand from her neck, shaking her head to the bard. The warrior smiled one last time and closed her eyes. * * *
"Gabrielle?" Xena stood just inside the tent that she and Gabrielle were using, the young woman had just fastened a leather halter top on. Xena walked into the tent, moving past the pile of bloody clothes her bard had just discarded. "Brie?" Xena had given Gabrielle the space she thought she needed, but now she was starting to get a little worried about the young woman. "I know... I need to get to the infirmary--," Gabrielle brushed past the warrior, "--and then I have to check on the supplies, and--" "Brie, stop," Xena commanded catching the woman with an arm around her waist, pulling her tightly against her body. "It's okay to just let go," Xena said softly. Gabrielle turned in the warrior's arms and held onto her lover as she sobbed uncontrollably. Xena could do nothing but hold the young woman and whisper soft words of love and comfort in her ear. The warrior told herself time and again the battlefield was no place for Gabrielle, she had
no warrior defenses built around her to weather the loss of friends and family. Her bard felt each consequent loss as strongly as the very first. Xena sat in a chair and pulled the young woman into her lap, letting her cry until she had no tears left. "Thank you, Xe," Gabrielle whispered. Eponin burst into the tent, "forgive me, your highness... they're on the move again, and it looks like Kirren's with them too." Gabrielle stood and watched as Xena rose from the chair. The warrior thought of a million arguments to use to keep Gabrielle from this battle, which would surely be the last. When she looked at the woman who stood beside her, however, dressed in Amazon leathers and armor, she didn't see the little girl from Potidaea that needed the Warrior Princess to rescue her. Xena saw a strong woman and a competent leader, someone who would live and die to protect her people, her friends, and her integrity. An Amazon Queen. The warrior saw the young Queen's staff leaning against the tent wall, near the entrance. She picked up the stave and tossed it back to her companion. "Be safe," Xena said. "Right back at ya," Gabrielle replied with determination. * * *
The tide had turned and those left among Kirren's soldiers who weren't dead or dying began to flee. There were perhaps fifty men that refused to give up, and they all seemed to converge on the Warrior Princess at once. "Ayah... Ayah!" Xena grunted and cried out with each slash and hack her
sword made as it tore into the human flesh around her. The field was slick with the blood of men and Amazons alike; the warrior growing weary of straining to hold on to the hilt of her blood drenched sword. Soon she saw nothing... felt nothing... thought nothing... heard no sounds of the battle around her; there was only the sound of her own blood pounding in her ears. Only the lightening quick movement of her blade as it sent soul after soul to Hades judgment. She was beyond feeling or caring, empty of everything but the skills that drove her to conquer. Her eyes lost a little of their blue tint with each blow she struck, until the clouded haze of battlelust stole the color from her irises completely. Any man who fought her and lived swore he had looked into the eyes of death that day. * * *
"Remember me?" Gabrielle shouted over the sounds of the battle. Kirren turned at the sound and the young Queen twisted her body hard, throwing all the weight she could into the sweeping right cross of her staff. Kirren took the blow well, considering it had broken more than one soldier's jaw today. Her sword went flying and she fell to her knees, but rolled as soon as she hit the ground, pulling a dagger from her boot, lunging at the bard with a look like astonishment on her face. Gabrielle was too exhausted to deflect the entire weight of the woman's body; she fell underneath Kirren as they both wrestled for the dagger in the warrior's hand. "You may have done it once, but there's no cheating Hades a second time!" Kirren screamed maniacally, raising the dagger above her head. Gabrielle knew she was too weak to keep the warrior's dagger from her
heart, looking into the vacant, insane stare of the woman on top of her. The bard held her breath and waited for the inevitable. A gurgling noise came from Kirren's throat as pinkish bubbles of blood formed on her lips. The dagger slipped heavily from her hand as the warrior looked, first at Gabrielle, then down at her chest at the point of a metal blade poking through her sternum. A large red stain slowly spread across Kirren's chest, the slicing sound of metal against bone, and the blade's tip disappeared. Ephiny pushed Kirren's body off of Gabrielle before the evil warrior even knew she was dead. She clutched weakly at Gabrielle's wrist as she fell to one side, gasping for breath. "Bite me," Gabrielle hissed, pushing the dying woman the rest of the way to the ground. By the time Kirren's flesh hit the blood stained grass, Hades was waiting for her. * * *
Sweat rolled into the warrior's eyes, blood and dirt covering her body as she swirled around to face her next attacker. She blinked hard, her eyes darting back and forth; her lungs on fire as they pulled in much need air. Xena realized there were no more. She had defeated the enemy, and now sank to one knee in an attempt to defeat the enemy within. The warrior leaned her head against her forearm, which rested heavily on the hilt of her sword, the tip of the blade buried in the red stained earth. "Xena?" Eponin cautiously reached a hand out to her friend. "Don't touch me!" Xena hissed, her jaw clenching spasmodically. "Xena, are you hurt?" The Amazon asked.
"It's not my blood," Xena said quietly. "Gabrielle?" Xena looked up at the warrior, sudden panic in her eyes. "She's allright, she's back at the camp treating the wounded in the infirmary. Kirren is dead." Eponin added. "I don't want Gabrielle to see me this way," Xena said rising to her feet. The warrior still looked slightly wild eyed, her hair matted with blood, gore covering her frame. "I need to get to my tent... keep Gabrielle out." Eponin helped the warrior into the camp and to her tent, standing resolutely as guard at the tent's entrance. Gabrielle looked calmer than she had moments before. She heard that Xena returned to the camp unharmed and the young Queen silently thanked Artemis, making her way to their tent. "Gods, why me?" Eponin muttered to herself, seeing Gabrielle walk toward her. Gabrielle tried to move past the Amazon, the warrior placing her body in front of the young woman. "My Queen," Eponin said nervously, "It would be better if you didn't go in." "Is Xena hurt?" Gabrielle asked, fearing she had not been told the truth. "Actually, its Xena's order... Gabrielle, she's not exactly... herself yet." Eponin added softly. Gabrielle looked stung by the Amazon's words. The young Queen tried to imagine a reason, something that would explain Xena's behavior. She's
not exactly herself. It had been so long since she and the warrior had been through a battle like this one; this was the first since they'd become lovers. Gabrielle had grown less and less suspicious of the time the warrior had spent by herself
after a large battle, presumably to find some sort of physical or sexual release. They were lovers now, however, and Gabrielle knew that if they didn't start here, it would be even harder the next time. "Move aside, Eponin," Gabrielle commanded. "Gabrielle..." Eponin wavered. "Eponin, perhaps you should refresh my memory... is Xena the Queen of the Amazon Nation?" Gabrielle asked, surprising her friend. "No, my Queen," "Then do I need to remind you who you serve?" "No, my Queen," Eponin answered, stepping aside. "Ep?" Gabrielle laid a hand on the warrior's shoulder. "If it sounds like my life is in danger... then you can protect me. Some things... even the ones we don't like to face, Xena and I need to work out for ourselves." Eponin pulled the tent flap back for Gabrielle to enter; thinking her friend never looked more like a Queen than she did at this moment. * * *
Gabrielle entered the tent and was immediately surrounded by an enigmatic energy that flowed from her warrior, crackling within the air of the canvas shelter. Xena was at the far end of the tent, her battle armor still on; she stood in a small washtub. Next to her was a large tub of steaming water. The warrior's arms held a wooden bucket high over her head, the warm water pouring over her face, hair, and body. Her back was to Gabrielle and she didn't appear to notice when the young Queen entered the tent. Xena bent to lift another bucket of water repeating the process. The bard saw bits of bone, blood, and other gore rinse away from the
warrior's body and off her armor, falling into the basin she stood in. Once the majority of the battle had been rinsed from her body, Xena stood, cradling the empty bucket in shaking arms. Her head went up and tilted slightly as she sniffed the air. Her senses were astounding in ordinary circumstance, but held in the passion of her battlelust as she still was, they were otherworldly. "Gab-ri-elle," she cautioned, "get out." The Queen didn't move and Xena threw the bucket to the floor, and stepped from the washtub, turning to face her. Water dripped from the warrior's body and she continued to bleed from a number of minor nicks and cuts too small to stitch closed. Gabrielle barely saw these, focusing on the warrior's eyes, as she strode slowly across the tent toward the Queen. Reaching out, Xena roughly grabbed the bard's arm and pulled her closer, a low growl emanating from the depths of Xena's chest. Their eyes met and Gabrielle saw that the warrior's still held the passionate haze of the battlefield. That struggle with life and death that, when she was victorious, gave the warrior powerful feelings and sensations that she could, indeed needed, to conquer anyone and everyone; to celebrate every physical aspect of being alive. This was battlelust and Gabrielle had never seen it directed at her from her lover's eyes before. Perhaps once... with the Horde, but she didn't really know what battlelust was back then. Warriors all conquered the battlelust with different methods. For the Warrior Princess it had always been sex. In the days when sex for her was wielded as power, the two became inextricably entwined. Had anyone ever asked the young Queen if she thought Xena would ever consciously hurt her, the answer would have always been an unequivocal no. Now, the bard saw a woman in front of her that was not completely cognizant of who she was or even where she was. It took every fiber of courage she had, for the Amazon Queen to look back into those eyes, glazed over with carnality, and not express that fear to her lover. Xena's whole body began to tremble and shake in her attempt to push
down the sensations that flooded her body and brain. Her effort at controlling her desires was winning until Gabrielle placed a gentle hand on the warrior's forearm. The sparkling blue eyes cleared momentarily, searching her lover's green depths. "Please... Gabrielle... leave," she said with between clenched teeth. Gabrielle's eyes were bright with their own fire. "I'm your lover, Xena... I won't leave you to release yourself by your own hand." She removed her warrior's grasp from her arm and tenderly placed the palm of her lover's hand over the pendant around her neck. "I belong to you... I'm the woman, and no other, whose bed you're to come to for pleasure or release." Gabrielle said softly. Xena pressed her palm over the pendant that lay atop her bard's heart as if to garner some form of calm from the piece. Being so close to the object of her desire, Xena leaned against the bard and breathed in the powerfully arousing scent of Gabrielle. Nothing would have pleased her battleclouded libido more than ravishing her lover right there, but still she held back. "I'm afraid, Brie..." she whispered near the bard's ear. "... Afraid... I'll hurt you. I don't know if I can control myself once I start." Gabrielle's answer was to entangle her fingers in Xena's wet, ebony locks and pull the warrior's mouth firmly to her own, and when Xena's tongue slid tentatively into the bard's open mouth, the warrior had her assurances. As Xena slipped her tongue between Gabrielle's soft lips, the bard moaned, the familiar taste of her lover filling her mouth. Pulling apart to breathe, the bard whispered the words that spent what little control the warrior had left. "I need to know all of you, Xena... the woman and the warrior!" The
Amazon Queen pleaded. Xena's demeanor changed before Gabrielle's eyes, the warrior's demon called battlelust rising and treading just beneath the surface. With one deep sigh the warrior breathed life into the beast and set it free to roam. Xena drew the younger woman to her, bruising her smaller body against the wet armor. Her fingers splayed through Gabrielle's hair, grabbing the golden locks aggressively in one hand, pulling the bard's lips roughly to her own. The kiss was frantic and full of need, powerful and urgent. The bard's mouth captured the fierce growl the warrior let loose. Gabrielle began to pull at the buckles that held the warriors breastplate and shoulder armor. Xena had priorities of her own. The warrior backed the young woman against the table, feverishly grinding her hips against her lover, drawing moans of pleasure from the bard. Lifting the smaller woman slightly so her buttocks sat on the edge of the table, Xena backed up to shrug off the loosened breastplate and nearly threw the heavy armor halfway across the tent. She removed her own breeches unceremoniously, clutching at the bard's belt and pulling the skirt away in one motion. Tugging once, then twice on Gabrielle's undergarment, she ripped the breeches off. The warrior thrust her knee against the young woman's heated center, grinding against the abundant wetness there. Once again the warrior grabbed Gabrielle's hair jerking her head back to expose her neck. She kissed and bit the length of the bard's neck, sucking on the flesh until she tasted blood. Straddling her lover's thigh, Xena was lost to anything but her wet sex rubbing along the bard's leg. Sliding both hands up the bard's back, Xena firmly grasped the leather halter and tore it in two, slipping the covering off her shoulders almost reverently compared to the way in which she rent the tanned hide. Xena released the bard's shoulders, pulling her lover's hands from around the warrior's neck, drawing them firmly behind the smaller woman's back. All the while Xena's hips drove against her lover's thigh. The warrior felt the bard's hips move up and against her, she shifted the bard's wrists to her left hand and whispered, letting her lips caress the bard's right ear.
"Is this what you want?" Sliding her fingers into the hot wetness between Gabrielle's legs. Gabrielle cried out in a voice hoarse with passion, her hips trying to rise from the table to draw the warrior's hand inside her. "Xena, please..." the Queen pleaded, "I need to feel you... I need to know all of you." Xena plunged into the bard with her hand, driving into her with a force she'd never used before. Gabrielle's response amazed the warrior, as the young woman began to thrust herself with abandon against the warrior's whole hand, which was slick with the bard's wetness. Gabrielle's groans of pleasure cut through the warrior's libidinous haze, searing jolts of desire beginning to swirl around her center. She continued to propel her right hand into her lover, releasing the young woman's wrists and reaching up with her left hand, she covered the pendant over Gabrielle's heart with her own palm. "Mine," the warrior said with a throaty growl. "You belong to me, Gabrielle... only me..." "Only you, my love," Gabrielle moaned, her own desire pushing her toward the edges of a powerful orgasm. Her bard's words captured the warrior's passions and sliced through to her very soul. She let herself fall into the whirlpool that swirled energetically around them, losing her focus on everything but the fire in her center and the motion of her arm that carried Gabrielle along with her. Each woman cried out the other's name as they fell into the center of the vortex together, feeling the air come alive with power and light. Clinging to one another and gasping for much needed air, the warrior turned her body to lean on the table, cradling the bard into her strong embrace. Long moments passed until they were both able to control their
breathing, then Xena began rubbing her hands lightly over the exposed flesh of the bard's small frame, all the while covering her mouth in affectionate kisses. To Gabrielle, her warrior's eyes still burned with an unspoken fire. "What is it, love?" The Queen asked between kisses. "Gabrielle... I need..." Xena whispered in a voice still raw with emotion. "Anything, Xe... anything." The bard replied tenderly. "I need to feel you... inside me..." Gabrielle slowly pulled the warrior toward the bath, and moving behind her, she loosened the laces of the warrior's leathers. The young Queen removed the warrior's boots, and then pulled the leathers down and off of Xena's body, taking her hand and leading her into the still heated water. She ran the soap across their bodies, cleaning off the last vestiges of the battle, massaging tension filled muscles until the warrior felt as liquid as the water surrounding the two lovers. Xena leaned against the wall of the tub, Gabrielle straddling the warrior's hips. Leaning forward to capture the bard's lips, the warrior moaned into the kiss as she felt the young woman's torso press firmly against her own, strong legs wrapping around the warrior's waist, the bard's warm center pressing against her belly, just above her own curls. Sliding her hand between them, Gabrielle continued on past the dark curls between the warrior's legs. Xena leaned back her head and growled passionately when the bard entered her with two fingers. Xena delighted in the bard's easy strokes, now unhurried and tender. Pressing her own hand firmly against the bard's sex, she tenderly stroked the swollen flesh. Gently, she caressed the length of her, avoiding the hardened bundle of nerves that soon begged for attention. Wrapped around one another, the Queen and her warrior went about bringing each
other toward a leisurely, mutual climax that left them both feeling, not only satiated, but also contented. Lying gratified in each other's arms, the warrior gingerly lifted her bard's chin, situating a well-deserved kiss upon Gabrielle's lips. * * *
It was a tearful reunion as Cyrene greeted her children, thanking the Gods who had listened to her prayers. At first the inn was a somber place as the injured Amazons were nursed back to health, and all involved in the battle confronted their own personal demons. Soon, however, the merriment returned to their eyes. It seemed as if everyone fed off the warrior and her bard. They had, at first, been quiet and keeping to themselves, dinners in their room; long talks into the night. As with everything in life, they were eventually able to put everything in its place, and look at life with a renewed perspective. They were all grouped around a large table in the tavern, having just listened to one of Gabrielle's tales. "You know, Eph," Gabrielle started, "I never did find out how all of you got here so fast... what was going on?" Xena's head shot up as she glared around the table. Ephiny actually began to make little stammering noises; the looks she was getting from the Warrior Princess were starting to unnerve her. In the meantime, Gabrielle leaned forward innocently awaiting the Regents answer, everyone else at the table finding things extremely interesting at the bottom of their mugs. "I, um... I... uh" Ephiny stared hard at Xena, mentally screaming at the warrior. Do something, Xena... do anything... now, now now!
It was then that Xena did the only thing she could think of doing. She proceeded to dump the entire contents of her mug down the front of Gabrielle's chest and into the bard's lap. "Good, Gods," Gabrielle exclaimed jumping up as the port soaked through her top and skirt. "I'm so sorry, Brie. You better soak that right away... here let me help you," Xena said as she pulled the bard by the hand toward their room. "Xena, are you sure you're feeling allright?" Gabrielle asked as she washed the port from her body with a damp cloth. "Sure... just a little clumsy I guess," Xena answered as she put the bard's clothes in a bucket of water to soak for the night. The warrior turned back to the bard, a very naked bard and felt a deep jolt of heat attack her body. Moving behind the young woman, Xena began to whisper into the bard's ear all the reasons she could possibly think of for not returning downstairs. By the time the bard was pulling off her warrior's leathers, Xena felt in the back of her mind that there was a reason she had not wanted Gabrielle to go back downstairs, but aside from the obvious, damn if she could think of it right now. * * *
Just as Xena had anticipated, she threw up.
My stomach hasn't been this nervous since I was a little kid. The warrior washed her mouth out, chewing on a handful of mint leaves to settle her stomach. I don't think I've thrown up since I was five! Xena would have felt a lot less ill if only she could be certain this was what Gabrielle wanted.
What if she turns me down... right in front of everybody?
"You look great," Eponin lied. "Right." Xena replied. "I'd feel a lot better if I only knew what her answer will be." Xena said shakily. "She talks to you, Ep... what's she gonna say?" "Xena, I can't tell you what Gabrielle and I talk about in private... urghhh! Thena... leth go ov my faith!" The warrior held onto the Amazon's face, squeezing Eponin's cheeks until her face began to turn blue. "Let me put it to you this way, Ep... tell me or I'll--kill--you!" Xena hissed. "Yeth... her anther will be yeth!" Eponin pulled away stretching and massaging her facial muscles to ease the soreness. Xena turned terrified eyes toward the Amazon. "She really does love me, doesn't she Ep?" Xena asked already knowing the answer. Eponin smiled, shaking her head at the normally stoic reserved warrior. "Yea, Xena... she really does love you." Xena smiled at that, her body language indicating the change in her emotions. "Um, by the way, Ep... that 'killing you' thing... well, that was just a joke. No hard feelings?" "Right," the warrior replied, rubbing her sore jaw. * * *
"Your highness," Ephiny addressed Gabrielle formally. "Eph?" Gabrielle questioned. It was midday and the bard had just finished
telling a bunch of schoolchildren a few stories. She sat at a small table, sharing a cup of tea with Cyrene, wondering why the midday meal crowd hadn't begun to filter in yet. "You have a visitor that brings a petition to the Amazon Nation and a formal request to the Queen." Ephiny stated cryptically. "Okay," Gabrielle rose to follow the Regent. "You'll need to wear formal attire," Ephiny said. "Well it'll take me a few minutes to get into my leathers..." Gabrielle started. "Actually, you have about two candlemarks till they get here," Ephiny took Gabrielle's arm and began to steer the Queen upstairs, "I'll help you." "Me too," Cyrene said jumping up from the table. "A nice hot bath might be just the thing to relax you," she said pulling on Gabrielle's other arm. "But I'm already relaxed," Gabrielle protested as the two women practically dragged her upstairs. * * *
Gabrielle had to admit that she did feel better after the bath. Cyrene had helped her pull her hair up and off her shoulders and the Regent stood behind the young Queen adjusting her shoulder armor. "Eph, who is presenting this petition?" Gabrielle asked. "Uhm... a Princess," Ephiny answered warily. "What does she want?" "Uh... to form an alliance," Ephiny smiled.
Gabrielle adjusted her boots one final time. "What do you think... is the alliance a good idea?" "Well, I think that should really be up to you to decide. I mean, listen to the petition and see if it would be something you could live with." "You must have an opinion?" Gabrielle asked. "Actually, my personal opinion is that I think it could, quite possibly, be a very mutually beneficial alliance." "Ready to go?" Ephiny asked, trying to avoid any further questions from her Queen. * * *
Ephiny led Gabrielle outside to the front porch of the inn. There were 4 steps to the top of the porch and it was agreed it would make a perfect dais. As Gabrielle walked out the front door of the inn the roadway was lined with Amazons on each side, who all dropped to one knee at their Queen's approach. Gabrielle rolled her eyes. Gods, I hate when they do
that! A round of drums began and the kneeling Amazons stood at attention as a processional made it's way up the roadway. Eponin led ten mounted Amazons; all of the riders had a small band of purple silk tied around their upper arms. Slowly the procession entered and the warrior dismounted. Eponin unrolled a scroll and began to read. "People of the Amazon Nation. Today a petition is presented to our Nation. For the first time since she has become our Queen, a proposal of Marriage is being sought after from outside our village. What say you Amazons? Do we allow the petitioner to state their case to our Queen?" Eponin finished.
"Aye," nearly 70 Amazon voices said in unison. If Gabrielle's jaw had dropped any lower it would have been sitting on the ground. Marriage?! Are they insane? Eponin came to stand in front of Gabrielle and knelt down on one knee, leaving the scroll at her feet. "My Queen, the Amazon Nation has given their permission for an outsider to request that you join with them in a Bonding ceremony. Will you allow the petitioner to plead their case?" Gabrielle searched the faces of her friends and subjects, suddenly wondering where Xena was. It hadn't occurred to her at first that her lover wasn't here. It can't be! She wouldn't... couldn't... Xena would fall on her
own sword before she'd get up in front of this many people... even for me! Still the Queen had to know, and when she dumbly nodded her head, a new processional entered the roadway. Gabrielle's breath caught in her throat and she had to keep reminding herself to breathe. You can do it...
breathe, in... out. Twenty Amazons surrounded the petitioner, breaking formation as they neared the inn to allow Xena to ride to the front of the group. The darkhaired warrior wore her hair loose, softly falling around the edges of her face, cascading down her back and across her broad shoulders. Rather than her usual armor, she wore tight black pants, tucked into knee high black leather boots, with silver trim. Instead of her usual leather tunic, the warrior wore a billowing, silk shirt, its long sleeves and purple color slightly hidden under the black leather vest that buckled down the front. The procession finally stopped and Xena dismounted. Gabrielle's senses were definitely on overload. When Xena stood still, her blue gaze captured the Queen's, the tightness of her pants, and the way the leather of the vest fit against her, left no doubt she was most definitely a woman. If at all possible, she actually looked more feminine in this attire,
than her revealing leathers, but every bit as powerful. "Your Highness," Xena bowed deeply. Realizing the warrior was waiting for some sort of acknowledgment before continuing, Gabrielle nodded. Xena turned to face the Amazons and, taking a deep breath, spoke in a loud clear voice. "People of the Amazon Nation, I give you my thanks for allowing me this petition." Then the warrior bowed again. Xena walked toward the Queen, slowly, each step filled with grace and power. Dropping down to one knee the warrior pulled her chakram from her belt, and slid her sword free from the scabbard that was strapped to her back. "Queen Gabrielle, I am Xena of Amphipolis. I am only a warrior. I have neither wealth to tempt you with nor kingdoms to ally yourself with. Actually, I have very little to offer you." Xena laid her weapons at the Queen's feet. "What little I do have I gladly give to you. I offer you my sword; to protect you and your people until I no longer have a breath left. I offer you my body, for your comfort, security, and pleasure until we no longer remain in this mortal realm. I cannot at this time give you my heart, however." A low murmur rose through the crowd and Gabrielle held up her hand to silence it, never releasing the warrior's gaze. When silence again reigned, the warrior continued. "As I said, I cannot at this time give you my heart, for after all, if you look closely you will realize that you already own it. You have held my heart from the very first moment I saw you." Xena rose and moved up the steps of the inn. Getting on her knees in front of the young Queen, she took the young woman's hand in her own. "Gabrielle, you are the only woman I have ever, will ever ask this question...
will you marry me?" Gabrielle had never felt so special, so loved before in her entire life. She had given up the hope that Xena would ever want to commit her life so completely, and, in her wildest fantasies, she never dreamed her warrior would make this big a production out of it. It thrilled her and frightened her all at once. She was speechless. Gabrielle was a bard, however, and the spectacular presentation and the love she felt for this woman before her, prompted her to display her own vocal abilities. "You say that you have very little to offer me. I think you underestimate your own worth," Gabrielle said, beginning to warm to the subject at hand. "But, I'll take what you offer, warrior. I'll accept your weapons and expect you to be the Champion to my throne and the defender of my honor. I'll take your body as well," she continued, raising an eyebrow suggestively. "Expecting you to serve only my needs and no other. And your heart... I'll keep your heart and give you another in exchange. I now give you my heart, which you stole so many seasons ago." Gabrielle turned to Xena's mother. "Cyrene, do you still have it?" Cyrene smiled and pulled the leather packet from her pouch. "Yes, Xena of Amphipolis, I will marry you," she said her tears matching the ones in the warrior's eyes. Gabrielle held up the necklace that she had made for her warrior, for all to see. "Xena, please take this necklace as my token of good faith, my pledge of sincerity, and a symbol of my love for you." Gabrielle leaned down and placed a warm kiss on the lips of the warrior as she placed the necklace over Xena's head. The air was immediately filled with clapping and shouting as the Amazon
Queen pulled the warrior to her feet and did what the warrior had thought she might someday... she kissed her thoroughly, right in front of her mother. "Wow," Xena said when the two finally pulled themselves apart. "The finest warrior in Greece, and the best you can come up with is, wow?" Gabrielle teased. "I don't know... I thought that kinda said it all." Xena said with a smile.
THE END
THE HEART OF A QUEEN DISCLAIMER:
Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, etc. are ©copyright MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. I don't own them, I just play with them for a while and, like the good girl I am, I put them back when I'm done…okay, they get a little worn, but hey…I play hard! Absolutely no Copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fiction. It's intended as flattery toward the creators, writers, and actors of the characters. All other characters that appear are ©copyright
[email protected]. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way (unless, of course, Lucy, Renee, Rob, et al want to make my dream come true and hire me, hah!). Copies may be made for private use only and I'd appreciate if you included all copyright notices and this disclaimer. VIOLENCE WARNING: There is some violence (come on it's the Warrior Princess). It's nothing more than
PG13. TIMELINE: My own making. Let's just say that India never happened, Eli never sucked the bard into buying
what he was selling, and Gabrielle never became a wimp and tossed her staff away. SEX: Yes, I'll have some, thank you. I mean, yes there is. It is our favorite two Soulmates, after all. It's not
gratuitous, but it is quite explicit when it gets going. This story shows consensual love, sex and yes, even some light bdsm between two adult females. Even when they get carried away, it's all done in love. If the thought of two women in a loving/sexual relationship bothers you…well, as Xena said, "Bite me!" HIGH ANGST WARNING: I was threatened within an inch of my life if I didn't start putting this disclaimer on
some (all?) of my work. I will henceforth rate the angst content with sad faces, one being the lowest and four being the highest. This story earns: 4 sad faces (for those without TT fonts). UNDERAGE WARNING: Hey, the Supreme Court said in Reno v. American Civil Liberties Union (1997) that
laws against making available, online, certain "indecent" materials for those under 18 was unconstitutional… look it up! Besides, this is perfectly "decent." I only know how others feel about my stories from feedback. Let me know what you think... homophobes need not apply, however. I'm at:
[email protected] A special thanks to Laura, a good friend of mine who wrote the poem, "Soulmates" that Xena gives Gabrielle. She is a talented bard in her own right and came up with the perfect words.
*This is the third story in the "Queen" series. While not absolutely necessary, it helps if you read themin sequence. The series begins with "To Become A Queen" and follows with "Quest For A Queen"
THE HEART OF A QUEEN
PART I
THE WARRIOR'S EYES hungrily followed the slim hips marching in front of her. Gods, she looks good. Xena licked her lips as she continued to watch her future wife walking before her. The dark-haired woman's hand held Argo's reins, her naturally long stride slowed on purpose. She loved having the young Queen by her side, but today she was letting her carnal thoughts run wild, enjoying the view from behind as the young woman kept the pace slightly ahead of her. Gabrielle's small physique had changed so much over the years they'd been traveling together. Years of using her staff had developed rock hard muscles in her arms, shoulders, and back, all covered by a soft, feminine skin that felt like Egyptian silk under the warrior's fingertips. They spent the winter in Amphipolis, which was something new for the pair. Except for the time Gabrielle spent recuperating in the Amazon village last year, they never stayed in one spot that long before. Cyrene was grateful for the help and the company over the cold winter months, and Xena and
her bard found out that having four walls around them for privacy definitely had its advantages. The wanderlust hit the both of them, however as soon as the first warm breezes of spring began. Xena remembered the night she lay in bed; Gabrielle wrapped tightly in her arms, the essence of their lovemaking permeating the room. She remembered also the look of love and adoration on the young Queen's face when the warrior asked her to travel to the Amazon Nation with her, and become her wife on the eve of the Summer Solstice. They sent Ephiny, the Queen Regent, a message stating their intentions. Since the Solstice was a good 3 moons away, it left plenty of time for the Amazons to prepare for their Queen's joining ceremony. They said their good-byes to Xena's family, with promises to see them again in the Amazon village for the wedding. That was nearly a moon ago. Ever since then it was one thing after another. Save a village from raiders here; take down an evil warlord there, non-stop requests from villagers everywhere they went. Neither woman thought anything about it really. Xena and Gabrielle made quite a formidable team, and it became easy for them to put aside their own personal desires for the greater good. It was starting to take its toll on the Warrior Princess' libido, however. If they weren't in the middle of a crisis, they were nursing small injuries, or they just plain dropped into their bedrolls at night exhausted beyond belief. So, the warrior was thoroughly enjoying their respite as saviors to Greece on this warm spring day, watching her bard move in front of her, fantasies of varying natures playing through her mind. "This way, Brie," The warrior stated, pulling Argo off the path and heading into the forest. "But--" Was all Gabrielle was able to get out before she had to run to catch up with the taller woman. "I really hate when you do that, you know." The young Queen said with a sly smile.
"I know," Xena said, smiling and lifting her eyebrows at her lover. "But, either Argo or I need a bath desperately... I'm not sure which one of us it is, so I'm playing the odds. I know where there's a nice quiet lake…small, but quiet. "How do you-oh, wait, I know…years ago your army came through here once," Gabrielle said, gesturing with her arms widely as if about to spin a tale. Xena couldn't help laughing at her lover's satiric use of her often-utilized line. "Well, it's true." The warrior said. "So where is this famous water?" Gabrielle teased. Xena never altered her stride nor looked at her lover through this entire exchange. Some things never changed, and as open with her feelings as the warrior had become with her bard nowadays, the majority of their travels were spent with Gabrielle talking and the warrior silent by her side. "Less talking, more walking and you'll find out." Xena replied. It wasn't very long until they reached the water. Oooh, nice, Xe." Gabrielle stated. The warrior smiled. She liked being able to surprise and please her bard. The two women went about setting up their camp quickly and without much discussion. Years of travel together had reduced this part of their journeying to a science. Once a fire was going and water put on to brew tea, Xena made a wide arc around their campsite, wanting to make sure they didn't run into any undesirable characters that might also be using the woods. Of course, her other intention was to make sure they were alone because the warrior had plans for her little bard. She still had a few of those fantasies running
through her mind from this afternoon that involved herself, her lover and absolutely no one else. "Brie?" The warrior called when she walked back into the empty camp. "I'm here, just be a heartbeat." Gabrielle called from the trees, then appeared moments later. Xena, in the meantime, sat down on the ground and began to remove her armor and boots. The warrior watched as Gabrielle came back into camp a disgusted look on her face. The young woman went to their saddlebags and tossed her undergarments into the pack. "I hate when this time of the moon comes around!" Gabrielle said, turning to look at Xena. "What?!" The warrior was stunned. Oh, please tell me this isn't happening... not now. "Didn't you just have it?" "Well, yes, love, but for some of us it does come around once a moon." Gabrielle explained. "Oh, great," Xena let her thoughts slip out. "I'm sorry, Xe." Gabrielle stood looking at the warrior, and when Xena looked up into her lover's face, she cursed her own selfishness. The look on the bard's face said that she knew she had disappointed her partner. "Oh, Brie…I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. Come here love," Xena held out her hand. Gabrielle stood by the seated warrior and Xena pulled the young woman down into her lap. "Please, forgive me, Brie. I didn't mean it to come out like that at all," the dark-haired woman kissed her lover's cheek, running her fingers through the young woman's hair. "I should have known, I usually do, I don't know where my mind's been at lately."
"I do," Gabrielle said, raising an eyebrow suggestively. "Well, maybe just a little," the warrior smiled sheepishly. "I still should have known, I can't understand why I didn't. Usually you give off a few signs, you know…backache, cramps…" the warrior trailed off. "It's just not a bad one, I'm not very uncomfortable at all. You know, Xe," Gabrielle leaned in to place a series of feather-light kisses on the warrior's neck. "I can still take care of you." Xena closed her eyes and marveled at the sensations that were running from the hypersensitive skin of her neck, straight to parts of her body further south. Oh, yes... this is exactly what I need. Leaning her head back, she released a low groan of desire. Suddenly the warrior opened her eyes. No, this isn't what I need... not like this. She didn't want sex to be used as merely a physical release, not anymore, and especially not with Gabrielle. "Brie, honey... wait," Xena forced herself to pull away from Gabrielle's touch. She placed her hands on the young woman's head, tilting it so she could look into the sea-green eyes that were looking into her own. "As much as I adore your touch... well, I'd rather wait for you." She said, kissing the tip of Gabrielle's slightly sunburned nose. "Are you sure," Gabrielle whispered back. "Yea, absolutely," Xena began to brush a line of light kisses along the young woman's jaw. When she reached the bard's ear, she whispered. "You know, Brie... we could... you know, anyway... I mean, it doesn't have to stop us." Xena finished pulling back slightly to see Gabrielle's reaction, hoping against hope. "Don't even go there, warrior." Gabrielle replied, abruptly getting up and walking down to the edge of the lake.
Xena let herself fall onto her back and hit the grass with a thud. It was days like this when she wished Gabrielle had more in the way of sexual experience, but she loved her just the way she was, puritan side and all.
Amazing... she can tie me to a bed and screw me all night long. Use a whip, phallus, and every other toy we have around, but when it comes time for her cycle, she turns into a Hestian virgin! She removed the rest of her clothing and went to join her lover in the cool water, taking deep breaths along the way to bank the smoldering fires that had nearly been a blazing inferno moments ago. * * *
Okay, tell her warrior. Just march right up to her, wrap your arms around her and take her up on the offer she made earlier. And what do I say? Gabrielle, if I don't have you and have you quick the top of my head's gonna explode? Nah, too gory an image. Okay, how about Honey... nope, if I start like that she'll know I want something. But, it's more than want. We're talking need here. That's it! Gabrielle, I need you. Perfect... Xena sat near the fire, sharpening stone in hand, until she had reached the perfect scenario in her mind. Gabrielle had already put away her scrolls and was settling down on the bedroll, listening to the rhythmic sounds of the warrior's stone on the metal of her blade. Making her way toward her bard, Xena laid her sword to one side and knelt beside the prone woman. "Gabrielle--" She began. Gabrielle looked at the dark-haired woman next to her, the bard felt the warmth of the fire relax her, causing the young woman to lean her head back, eyes closed tight, a let out a loud yawn. "I'm sorry, Xe... what is it you wanted to say?" Gabrielle asked. Xena looked at the beautiful young woman and every selfish thought she'd
been having simply flew away. "You look tired, baby," the warrior stroked the woman's cheek. Not attempting to say a thing about what she'd been thinking to herself. You,
my dear warrior, are a selfish twit... you don't even deserve this woman. "Get some sleep, love." she finished, kissing her lover tenderly on the lips, then once on the forehead. "Aren't you coming?" Gabrielle asked.
Nope, not tonight! "I'll be a little while longer, I need to finish sharpening my sword." Xena replied. Once the warrior settled herself on a log by the fire again, the internal battle began anew.
I can't believe you didn't even ask... she probably would have said yes. I mean, at least one of you would be going to sleep with a smile on your face. Yea, but she did look tired, and she looks so damn cute when she yawns like that. Oh, you are so whipped. Allright shut up! Oh, Gods... I'm yelling at voices in my head. This is going to be such a long night! All the while, Xena continued the long, steady strokes of the sharpening stone. Shiiing... Shiiiing... Shiiing... "Xena..." Gabrielle's voice called to her from their bedroll. Xena looked up... Shiiing... Shiiing--thump! The dark haired woman did something she never did before, not once in her entire life. She was in mid-slide across her blade when she looked up at Gabrielle. The stone simply kept going, on along to the end of the blade, and fell with a heavy sound to the ground. The warrior was absolutely in shock. Not so much by losing her grip on her sharpening stone, but for losing her grip on what little control remained in her hormone clouded
brain. Xena blinked her eyes hard, waiting for the mirage to disappear. Gabrielle leaned up on one elbow from the bedroll, one of the blankets falling low on her shoulder, exposing a beautiful breast to the stunned warrior. Xena thought about responding verbally to the young woman, but that would be impossible considering their was no longer the smallest particle of air to be found in or around the warrior's lungs. She would swear later, that she did open her mouth, but sound refused to issue forth. "See anything you like, warrior?" Gabrielle said in a husky voice, suddenly full of desire. Xena, the former Destroyer of Nations, who had nearly conquered all of Greece, the warrior who commanded armies of men, who, obeyed her not only out fear and respect, but because her battle speeches aroused them to such a pitch they willingly threw down their lives for her. This woman now sat a few feet away from the greatest invitation she would ever be given, and all she could do was nod dumbly. "Well, if what you want is way over here, my question is... what are you doing way over there?" Gabrielle asked. It wasn't just a question, it was a command. Xena's brain registered the waiting body language of her lover and nearly tripped over her own feet in her haste to get to the other side of the fire. Like an adolescent schoolboy, she couldn't get her boots off fast enough. That's when the warrior looked down at the woman waiting on the bedroll. A slow, delicious smile spread across Gabrielle's face and it seemed as if her features changed with that smile. The warrior had seen that look before. Xena knew at that moment that her lover was entering her Amazon Queen mode and the standing woman froze. A distinct whimper escaped the dark-haired woman's throat. Oh, dear Gods, Gabrielle... you are not
going to do this to me tonight... not when I'm in such a state already, are you?
Gabrielle arched an eyebrow at the warrior and pulled back the blankets of the bedroll to reveal her nude form. "Do you think you've done something to deserve this warrior?" Gabrielle asked.
Oh, yea... you are. Oh, my love you are truly wicked... and I love it! Allright, my little bard... I know you enjoy this, the Gods know I will... if I live through it. Xena immediately dropped to her knees and lowered her eyes to the ground. "No, my Queen... I'm sure I don't deserve this gift." Xena replied. "Then why do you think I should share this?" Gabrielle let her hand slide across a breast and down the length of her torso in a teasing motion. Xena watched as her lover's hand came to rest on her abdomen, just below her navel. The young woman wore only the thin leather belt around her hips and the cloth between her legs that she wore instead of an undergarment this time of the moon. The warrior quickly searched her brain for an answer that would appeal to the young Queen. "Because it pleases you?" Xena answered, hesitantly. "Good answer, warrior." Gabrielle pulled herself up until she was on her knees facing the kneeling warrior. The bard let herself lean into the taller woman until her nipples just grazed Xena's leathers. "Because, after all, it is about my pleasure, isn't it warrior?" Xena felt the hard points of flesh lightly touch against the leather covering her skin, just below her own breasts. "Always, my Queen." She replied a little breathless. No matter how many times they played this game, her warrior's subservient demeanor always amazed the young Queen. This was part of the
excitement, however, for Xena as well as Gabrielle. The young blonde raised herself up until she was standing before the kneeling woman, her hands on the warrior's shoulders. Gabrielle watched as Xena realized she was nearly eye to eye with the cloth that hid what the warrior so sought after. The kneeling woman took in a deep breath and closed her eyes, the corners of her mouth curling slightly upward. Xena couldn't help the expression that crossed her face. She tried to hold it back, but the sweet, metallic scent of blood, mixed with the fragrance of Gabrielle's own arousal, affected the warrior deeply. Gabrielle ran her fingers through the raven mane that fell across the warrior's broad shoulders, and enticingly down her back. Again Xena closed her eyes at the tingling sensation as Gabrielle raked her fingernails seductively across the kneeling woman's scalp. Xena could have stopped what she did next, but she went ahead and did it anyway. Gabrielle was so close to her and the Queen's scent was driving her mad. She reached her tongue out and slid the tip in a delicate stroke against the young woman's abdomen. She felt her head pulled back sharply, Gabrielle's finger entwined in her hair. The pain, mixed with the taste of her lover's skin on her tongue caused her to smirk up at the woman above her. "Did you enjoy that?" Gabrielle asked, pulling back harder on the warrior's hair. Xena tried not to react, but her smirk grew larger. "I think you do things like this on purpose, warrior..." Gabrielle pulled the woman's head back even further until she was whispering in her ear. She never wanted to hurt her lover, but with the Warrior Princess, a little pain always seemed to fire up the woman's libido. "I think it's because you enjoy your punishments almost as much as your rewards," Gabrielle whispered, running her own tongue down the length of
Xena's ear. The combination of that action and the promise the young Queen was making was enough to cause the warrior's whole body to tremble with desire. Gabrielle suddenly released the kneeling woman's hair and moved away. Xena knew better than to turn around and look to see where her lover had gone. She could hear her rummaging through their bags and her stomach did a slight flip in anticipation at what the bard would come up with. Did I
say something about her lack of sexual experience... what could I have possibly been thinking? Xena knelt there obediently. She had pushed it far enough already, but Gabrielle always expected her to do at least something to be punished for. If she went too far, her lover would accuse the warrior of not playing the game, and the whole night would be over. Xena thought that an idle threat until she tested the young Queen's limits one night. Gabrielle got up from the bed and put on her robe, telling the warrior if she couldn't play the game right; she could damn well play by herself. Xena was shocked that Gabrielle actually carried through on the threat. The warrior never repeated that mistake. Now would be a miserable time for that to happen to her again. Xena lowered her eyes to the ground and wiped the smirk off her face as she heard Gabrielle walk up behind her. The young woman placed a few objects on the bedroll just out of Xena's line of sight. "Do you know why you're being punished?" Gabrielle knelt behind the warrior. "Yes, my Queen... I disobeyed your order." Xena answered. "And what is the only command that I give you... one little command, that you can't seem to follow?" Gabrielle slapped the inside of Xena's thighs lightly, indicating that the kneeling warrior should widen her stance, then the bard pressed her body against the warrior's back. "I cannot experience any pleasure without your permission, my Queen." Xena answered, feeling Gabrielle's breasts press against her leather covered back.
"Now, what part of that don't you understand?" "I do understand, my Queen... forgive me, I--I lost control." "Well, then that's what we'll have to work on, warrior, isn't it? Your control." Gabrielle began to unlace the back of Xena's leathers. She never usually loosened them so completely, it was a pain to thread them again, but she wanted to take the tunic off over the warrior's head. Once the task was completed and the leathers were removed, she pressed herself against her lover again; reveling in the feeling of Xena's sweat soaked body. She ran her fingers up the sides of the warrior's torso, along the sides of her breasts. She ran her fingertips just underneath the top of the breeches the kneeling woman still had on. Then she removed her hands altogether. Xena felt the cool touch of metal against her abdomen. "Go ahead and look," Gabrielle commanded. The warrior looked down and just as she suspected, Gabrielle held Xena's breast dagger in her hand, the flat of the blade pressed against the warrior's skin. For her part, Gabrielle was doing everything she could to test the warrior's legendary control. She slid the blade up until the metal slipped over Xena's nipple, a barely discernible gasp coming from the warrior. The Queen decided to overlook this slight loss of control considering the circumstances. She knew she was the only one in the known world who had ever... would ever come this close with a blade to the Warrior Princess. She continued to move the blade downward until the tip hooked itself in the top of the warrior's breeches, over her leg. Sliding it in until it poked out and rested against a muscular thigh, Gabrielle jerked the blade upward, slicing through the material in one stroke. She repeated her action on the other side until the rent garment fell to the ground. Gabrielle threw the blade onto the ground and used her hands on the newly exposed skin to drive the warrior to the brink of insanity. Her nails ran up the back of Xena's thighs and on to her buttocks, squeezing the muscular flesh. Her
hands roamed around the warrior's hips, caressing a taut abdomen, then sliding down to swirl into the damp curls between the warrior's legs. Xena was holding on much better than Gabrielle thought she would by this point. The evening breeze blew against the warrior's damp skin and the Queen mused to herself, wondering if it was the cold or her attentions that caused the dark-haired woman's nipples to grow rock hard. The bard let her index finger circle the pebbled flesh. "Are you ready for your punishment to begin?" Gabrielle whispered into her ear. An unexpected groan escaped through the warrior's lips and Gabrielle chuckled. "Oh, no... we haven't even begun, my warrior. Now, give me your hands." Xena placed her hands behind her at the small of her back and felt Gabrielle begin to bind her wrists tightly together with a length of leather. The young Queen pulled tight, but didn't tie it off, instead placing the end of the binding strip in Xena's palm. If anything happened or if the warrior wanted to stop the game, all she had to do was release the end of the leather to free herself. "Do you think you can hold on to that for me, warrior... the whole time?" Gabrielle asked, pulling on the leather. "Anything for you, my Queen," Xena panted. "Good," Gabrielle said, carefully moving around to face the warrior. "Magnificent," the young Queen breathed, sitting back on her heels to enjoy this view of her warrior, the woman's arms and shoulders pulled back, causing her breasts to jut forward more than usual. Gabrielle looked at the dark-haired woman's body before her as if she were some feral creature the Queen had just captured, wild and sensual in her dark beauty. Now it was time to tame the beast.
Gabrielle lifted the lid from a small clay jar and dipped one finger inside. Removing her honey-coated finger, she lifted it to Xena's breast and began to coat the warrior's nipple with the sticky liquid. Xena could guess what was coming next and steeled herself against a response when she saw her lover bend her head down, and wrap her lips around the hardened flesh. The warrior held on as wave after wave of delicious pleasure crashed over and through her. The sounds of delight her bard was making as she completed her task weren't helping either. The warrior's chest heaved and her body was covered in a fine sheen of sweat, but she kept the rest of her body in check. Then Gabrielle tried something different. She began to lightly nibble on the warrior's erect nipple. Very gently, but non-stop, as if she were planning on devouring the flesh. She used her teeth to delicately chew on the hard nub of flesh until she could hear the warrior's audible gasps with each breath. Then she repeated the whole procedure with the other breast. Xena had her eyes screwed shut, knowing if she looked down, even once, she would explode in a massive climax. She could feel her wetness tickling her as it flowed from her aroused sex, and slid down the inside of her thighs. Gabrielle too, could see the results of her warrior's arousal glistening on her thighs in the firelight. She slid a finger through the dark curls, dipping it into the warrior's cleft, steering clear of the area that begged for her attention. The young queen brought her glistening finger up to her lips and stopped. "Open your eyes, warrior. I want you to watch me." Gabrielle commanded. Xena's eyes snapped opened to the sight of Gabrielle, reaching out a pink tongue to lick Xena's essence from the bard's own finger. "Mmmm, warrior, you taste so good." Gabrielle murmured. Still Xena held on, pulling in air through her mouth. Gabrielle was amazed at her lover. For her, this is what this game came down to. It wasn't about
the power. Oh, sure, there was a definite thrill at having a completely willing woman, prostrate before her, but the power game was Xena's territory. The Warrior Princess loved the games where total control came with surrender. For her, the sexual excitement was in her partner's desire to be conquered. The Amazon Queen looked at their little scenarios differently. For Gabrielle the complete joy and raw excitement was taken from watching her warrior take control of her own body. The Queen smiled to herself as she moved closer to Xena, reaching onto the bedroll for the last item they would use tonight. If the positions were reversed, Gabrielle would have been begging for Xena to take her quite some time ago. Xena's mind clearly forgot it was a game half the time. The bard smiled again. She never really knew if it was Xena's determination to win or if she just did it to please Gabrielle, but her warrior hung on till she was on the brink of sexual exhaustion before she would ever give in. Gods, she is incredible. Gabrielle moved so close to the kneeling warrior, the bard's nipples grazed the taller woman's skin. She began to kiss Xena's neck, nipping at the tender flesh. That's when Xena felt it. "Oh, Gods!" the warrior exclaimed. Gabrielle moved the tip of the ivory phallus and circled it around the warrior's opening. "Is this too much for you, warrior?" Gabrielle asked in a whisper. "If it is, all you have to do is tell me." The bard tugged gently on Xena's earlobe with her teeth. Gabrielle was absolutely in awe at her lover's mastery over her own flesh. The dark-haired woman breathed as if she were running the race of her life, her body drenched in sweat. The Queen watched as a slight penetrating motion with the phallus sent shudders of pleasure through the warrior. The taller woman's muscles fairly quivered from the restraint she was showing.
"You can have this, warrior." Gabrielle swirled the toy. "Isn't that what you'd like... all of me, deep inside you? Answer me." Gabrielle ordered. "Yes, my Queen, that's exactly what I'd like." Xena answered in a shaky voice. "Mmmm, that's exactly what I'd like to give you, too. Hard and fast... that's how you like it, isn't it?" "Yes, m--my Queen." "Let me give it to you... all you have to do is accept defeat... beg me for it, warrior." Gabrielle tempted. "Never, my Queen," Xena hissed. Gabrielle pulled back to meet the blue eyes that challenged hers with the tiniest of grins. "Very well, warrior... if you want to act like a wild beast, then I believe I'll have to tame you like one." Gabrielle said as she thrust the phallus deep inside, holding it there momentarily, before sliding it in and out in a slow and deliberate rhythm. "Sweet, Athena!" Xena cried out, her hips quickly becoming seduced by the erotic rhythm that Gabrielle's hand set. The young Queen swirled, dipped, and teased the cylindrical object inside her lover's body until the warrior's hips began to thrust themselves against the bard's hand. "Oh, Gods!" Xena cried out, throwing back her head and allowing her body to give in to the physical pleasure. Through clenched teeth the warrior growled, "Harder!" Gabrielle deliberately slowed, then stilled her movement. "Please..." the warrior pleaded, still unwilling to admit defeat.
"I'll give you what you want, once you give me what I want. You know what I want to hear, warrior," Gabrielle whispered in Xena's ear, pressing her body tightly to the warrior's, then once again beginning the beguiling movement of the object buried deep inside the writhing warrior. "Ohhh, please, Gabrielle... please, I'm begging you my Queen, don't stop fucking me!" Xena begged, her body now beginning to melt into the relief Gabrielle's talented hands promised. The young Queen only had one thought in her head once she heard the warrior's tortured plea. Her intentions became clear. She spread the fingers of her free hand, sliding them through her lover's dark curls, then smiled, as she stroked the ignored bit of flesh, now slick with the warrior's impending orgasm. Meanwhile she followed the wishes of her lover as the dark-haired beauty begged to be taken harder and faster. The young Queen wielded the phallus until Xena screamed her release into the nighttime sky. Xena slumped against Gabrielle's shoulder, her breathing still ragged and uneven. The bard had to practically uncurl the warrior's fingers from the leather binding. She eased the spent woman down onto the bedroll, massaging her aching shoulders. Xena lay against the bard, the warrior's face buried in the young woman's neck. "Gabrielle," Xena panted. "Do you have any idea what you do to me? You are a truly wicked young woman. I'm so glad I belong to you." The warrior said with a smile and closed her eyes. "Trust me, you give as good as you get, my love." Gabrielle responded to the warrior's flattery. "Oh, Brie," Xena rolled onto her back, arms flung out in a gesture of defeat. "I'm not even in your league!" Gabrielle laughed and moved herself over her lover. "Just remember that, Warrior." The young Queen said.
Xena growled into the passionate kiss that the two exchanged, rolling the bard onto her back. "I accepted your punishment my Queen," Xena purred. "Now, I want my reward." She finished as she covered Gabrielle's neck in a shower of kisses. * * *
"Where in the known world have you two been." Eponin asked, rising from her kneeling position in front of her Queen. The Amazon warrior caught the look that passed between the Queen and her Consort. Gabrielle started to speak, but she must have thought better of it because she closed her mouth immediately, a lovely pink flush rising to her cheeks. "Oh, don't even go there, Gabrielle. I don't want to know, do I?" "No, you don't." Xena snickered with a wicked smile and an air of a very satisfied warrior, walking past their Amazon friend and on toward the village. "Gabrielle!" The Queen Regent gave the approaching young woman a smile that could only be described as relief, followed by a heartfelt hug. "Sorry, Xena, didn't mean to ignore you, but Gabrielle you don't know how very glad I am that you're finally here. Where have you two been anyway?" Ephiny asked. "Don't ask." Eponin said flatly, coming up behind the trio. Ephiny caught the innuendo in the timber of Eponin's voice and raised an eyebrow at the blue-eyed warrior that stood by the Queen's side.
"Hey, I didn't know we were on a time table, okay?! We were busy doing..." the warrior eyed the women around them and paused to come up with a suitable word, suddenly realizing that she should have let her bard talk them out of this one. "... Stuff." she finished weakly. She couldn't very well tell these Amazons that she'd just spent the last three days taking their Queen in every way imaginable, in nearly every conceivable spot along the Greek countryside. She and Gabrielle exchanged a look, the young Queen not making any effort to jump in and fish the warrior out of the deep pond she'd just jumped into. As a matter of fact, to the warrior, it looked like her bard had a rather amused expression on her face. Oh, I'll remember this, my heart. Just you wait. Truth be known, Gabrielle was indeed enjoying herself watching her warrior tread water. Nor did she miss the imperceptible expression in Xena's eye, when the dark-haired woman caught the young Queen's glance. I know I'll
pay later, my love, but sometimes, seeing you lose that cool demeanor, makes it worth it all. "Okay, we're here now," Gabrielle shook herself from that road of thought. "First I'd like a hot meal and something cool to drink. Why don't we go to the food hut and you can tell me what all the excitement is about." The friends sat at the Queen's table, and Gabrielle's appetite being legendary among the Amazons, it was quite some time before the young Queen's stomach monster was finally sated. They pushed their plates aside and began the visit in earnest. Xena and Eponin spoke of the winter in Amphipolis, the Amazon talking Xena into helping her give a weapons demonstration to a class of new recruits later that day. Hearing their Queen had returned, the healers, Adia and Sartori entered the food hut and made their way to the Queen's table, where the conversation was beginning to get louder.
"Sartori!" Gabrielle exclaimed, jumping up to hug her friend. "My Queen," the healer responded, never forgoing her formality with her young friend. Uncharacteristically, Xena stood and shared an embrace with each of the healers. The warrior would never forget the debt she felt she owed to the two women. Sartori, for healing Gabrielle's body after she was attacked last season, and Adia, for helping to heal the young Queen's mind. Xena didn't even like to think about how different this past season would have been had she and Gabrielle never admitted their feelings for one another. The Queen's table became quite busy as friends and well wishers stopped by to wish the Queen and her Consort a happy and joyous Bonding ceremony. It went unnoticed by many, but Sartori's watchful eye caught it and she nudged her mate, she and Adia exchanging a knowing glance. They both smiled at the way Xena pushed her chair back from the table, still conversing with Eponin, and nonchalantly placed an arm around the young Queen's shoulders, absently allowing her thumb to stroke the bard's skin as she talked. Just as effortlessly, Gabrielle moved slightly to lean into the casual embrace. They were completely unconscious gestures by the two women, which is the very reason it appeared so natural and loving. "So, Eph, what's the panic about?" Gabrielle finally asked. "We're having company and I really am not prepared for this part of the job." The Regent replied. "You remember King Tralos... the land agreement from last spring? He wants his daughter to see, and I use his words, how a real Queen runs a nation!" "Oh, no." Gabrielle looked momentarily stunned. "Oh, yes My Queen. His daughter is his only child and heir to the throne. He wants her to learn how to rule and he's quite adamant that her tutelage be with her Royal Majesty, Queen Gabrielle." Ephiny continued with a smirk.
"But, why me? I mean she could go to Athens and learn everything she needs to know about politics and royalty." "I tried to narrow him down on that, but he just said that once I met her it would become apparent why he wanted her to learn here." Ephiny shrugged her shoulders. "Sorry, Gabrielle. I know this isn't what you need right now with the wedding and all, but you know important those land rights are to our Southern borders." "Of course, Eph, I understand. I don't think I can teach anyone how to be a Queen, though." Gabrielle leaned closer to the Regent. "I'm winging it most of the time myself, but I'll gladly make myself available. I wonder what King Tralos means, though... we'll know when we see her." The Queen mused aloud. "Maybe she's an incredibly gorgeous woman who wants to know what Amazon life is really like." Eponin said with a glint in her eye and a suggestive smile. Xena leaned back her head and laughed, slapping the warrior on the back. "You just keep dreaming, Ep." The warrior said * * *
After the midday meal, Gabrielle headed straight for the council chambers to catch up on village business and prepare for the Princess' arrival. Xena was ambushed immediately by Eponin's class of young warriors. The Amazons were anxious to learn, but even more anxious to test their skill with the Warrior Princess. By the time the grimy warrior arrived at the Queen's hut, Gabrielle was already soaking in a steaming bath. Leaning back, her eyes closed in relaxation, the young Queen let her mouth curl upward realizing who entered the room.
"Mmmm," Xena murmured as she bent to place a delicate kiss on Gabrielle's neck. The warrior's lips lingered there for a moment enjoying the taste of her lover's skin. "I have to warn you, I'm a betrothed woman." The Queen remarked, her eyes remaining closed. "Oh? Is your joining to be soon?" Xena played along, hastily removing her armor. "Very soon, in fact." "Well then, we don't have any time to waste, do we? Is your lover the jealous type?" Xena asked in a sultry voice, as she shrugged out of her leathers. "Very much so. She is the Warrior Princess, after all." "Ahh, she's highly over rated from what I hear." Xena stepped into the tub behind Gabrielle; the young woman moving up to make room for the warrior. The dark-haired woman slipped an arm around the Queen's waist and pulled the small blonde toward her. Gabrielle leaned back against the warrior's chest, feeling the hard points of aroused flesh press into her back. The young Queen's breath quickened as the warrior ran gentle fingertips up and down the length of her arm. "And, this jealous Warrior of yours, does she satisfy you?" "Oh, yes," Gabrielle answered without hesitation. "Ahhh, that's only because you haven't yet experienced the pleasures that my body can bring to you. Would you like to hear what I'd like to do to you, My Queen?" Xena whispered seductively. The warrior began to paint a vivid picture with her words that caused
Gabrielle's pulse to race and her breathing to become ragged. The combination of the warrior's sultry voice and the pleasures she promised pushed the young Queen's body to the brink. "Gabrielle..." Xena purred in a hot breath against her lover's ear. "Yes, love?" "I need... I need you to..." Xena hesitated. "Yes, love... anything." Gabrielle responded breathlessly. "I need you to... wash my back." The warrior responded a large toothy grin on her face. She held up a bath cloth in front of the young Queen's eyes. "What?!?" Gabrielle sputtered. "I need you to wash my back, Xena replied matter of factly. The warrior never had a soapy bathing cloth flung into her face before. It was definitely something new. * * *
"Thought I might find you here." Ephiny took a seat on an overturned bucket, watching Xena brush down Argo. The Golden mare nickered softly at the gentle attentions from her mistress. "What's up?" Xena questioned, blinking and rubbing her right eye. "You okay?" The Regent inquired. "Yea," Xena turned her face away from the Amazon in hopes she wouldn't see the blush the warrior knew was heating up her face. "I just got some soap in my eyes while I was taking a bath."
"Oh. Well, I just wanted to let you know that we're having a little celebration tonight in honor of Gabrielle's return to the village--" "That figures." Xena snorted. "What's that supposed to mean?" Ephiny directed a confused gaze toward the warrior. "It means, my Amazon friend, that you women will do anything to have a party." "Hey, we like to enjoy ourselves," The Regent deadpanned back at the warrior. "That much is apparent." Xena responded in a low voice. "Well, I wanted to tell you so that you and Gabrielle could make sure... you know, that you have, uhm... a good time tonight." "We will Eph, thanks." Xena chuckled.
Sweet Artemis, she's not getting it. "No, I mean a real good time... tonight... later." The Regent added. "Sure, Eph." Xena looked perplexed as the Amazon just continued to stand there, her arms now folded across her chest. Biting her lip as if to keep from saying anything else. "Ephiny, being coy doesn't suit you, besides it's annoying the Tartaurus out of me. Whatever you have to say, spill it." Xena said firmly. * * *
Gabrielle sat back in her chair taking a sip of the tea that had grown cold.
The young Queen split the seal on another scroll and began to read the document. If there was one unappealing aspect to being Queen, this was it. There's so damn much paperwork! She stretched and took another swallow of the tepid, amber liquid. That's when she heard it. The shout was definitely her lover's voice and it came from the direction of the stables. "Are you insane?" Xena yelled. Gabrielle wondered if she should investigate, but hearing neither the clash of swords nor the zing of a chakram slicing through the air, she realized her Warrior was probably talking Athenian politics with Adia again. Those two could act as if they were going to come to blows half the time, then walk off and enjoy a mug of mead a candlemark later. Almost a quarter of a candlemark later, Xena stalked into the hut and the Queen immediately sensed that she should go into her keep out of the warrior's way mode. The dark-haired woman looked down at her lover and the rage expressed on her face seemed to melt away on the breeze. The warrior gave the seated woman a small grin and dropped into the seat next to the small blonde. "Gabrielle, have you done much studying regarding the Amazon customs for when their Queen takes a Consort?" Xena finally asked. "Well, I'm trying to. Ephiny dumped about twenty scrolls off a while ago, but I have to admit some of the laws look pretty old. It's been an awfully long time since they had a Queen that wasn't bonded before she took the throne. Besides the fact that some of them seem to have been written by scholars that had a little too much of the legendary Amazon wine. I mean, they're about as clear as the river Styx." Gabrielle punctuated her statement by tossing a scroll in the warrior's direction. Xena looked at the offending parchment and shook her head at the double-entendre in the lines of script. "We need to talk, honey." Xena said, looking into confused green eyes.
* * *
Ephiny was determined to be nowhere in sight when the Queen received Xena's message. She left the stables a heartbeat after Xena did. By the time she was halfway across the village, Gabrielle's shout could be coming from the Queen's hut. "Are you insane?" Gabrielle's usually calm voice bellowed. The Regent winced and decided hiding out until tonight's festivities, might be a good thing. * * *
"Would you please repeat that? Because I am desperately hoping that I heard you wrong." Gabrielle, who was now standing, asked the seated warrior. "We have to abstain from sex until our wedding night." Xena repeated flatly. "This is part of Amazon law? Are you absolutely sure?" Gabrielle began pacing the room until the warrior grew dizzy watching. Xena nearly pummeled poor Ephiny when the Regent made a sly wisecrack about Xena's libido where Gabrielle was concerned. Now it was the warrior's job to calm her future bride down. "Gabrielle... Brie," Xena called softly, reaching a hand out to coax the young Queen into her lap.
Once Gabrielle had settled herself in the warrior's strong embrace, nuzzling the tanned skin of her lover's neck, Xena explained. "All I know is what little Ephiny said she was able to tell me. She said the abstinence is part of a test. For one full moon before our bonding ceremony, we have to remain celibate. We're both to meet with the high priestess, in the Temple of Artemis tomorrow, it's some kind of interview." The warrior looked down at her lover and saw Gabrielle's face tucked into a frown. She chuckled silently to herself at the young Queen's reaction. When Xena first heard the news from Ephiny, she would have sworn that their roles would be reversed right now. Yet, here was the young woman of her heart, not all that long ago being innocent to the touch of the warrior, now obsessing over their forced lack of intimacy. Xena used two fingers to gently lift the young Queen's chin until the sapphire and emerald green orbs locked together. "Let's not think about the time we'll have to refrain, let's think about how incredible our wedding night will be." Xena said with a seductive smile that always had a way of turning Gabrielle's knees weak. "I'm sorry, love. I didn't mean to get so, well, it's just that... you know..." "I know, my heart... I know. Me too." The warrior added before lightly brushing her lips against the soft ones that belonged to the woman she loved. Gabrielle never ceased to be amazed at the tenderness and patience that the former Warlord could bestow upon the young Queen. This was a side of herself that the warrior rarely allowed others to see; instead she reserved this tender aspect of her personality only for the young woman she called, her heart. To Xena, Gabrielle was her heart. The warrior knew that should anything ever happen to Gabrielle, Xena would feel the pain as if it were her own. When the warrior looked down the road at their future, she was certain that when Gabrielle's time within the mortal realm was through and she would
be taken home to the Elyssian Fields, that Xena's heart would stop beating as well. Her heart was so thoroughly possessed by the young woman from Potidaea, Xena knew it could be no other way. The warrior felt the weight of a pendant against her throat. Gabrielle had the piece of jewelry crafted for her as a symbol of the young Queen's love. Its presence reminded Xena that Gabrielle had entrusted her heart to the warrior as well. "Well, I have good news and bad news." Xena said, shaking the serious thoughts from her mind. "And the bad news would be?" Gabrielle asked. "Today is the last day we have to enjoy the pleasure of one another for the next moon." "And you said you had good news?" The Queen inquired, while a mischievous smile played on her warrior's face. Xena got an embarrassed look and shrugged her shoulders. "They're throwing you a party tonight?" She said weakly. "Oh, wonderful!" Gabrielle exclaimed with a laugh. "We have to celebrate our chastity, too." "On the bright side," Xena said, standing up swiftly with Gabrielle still in her arms, "We have a few candlemarks until the party and I'd like for you to teach me everything you know about being an Amazon Queen." "Hhmm," Gabrielle murmured against the warrior's already heated skin as she began to caress the woman's neck with her lips and tongue. "It seems that everyone is anxious to learn under me, lately." She finished, tugging gently at the skin with her teeth. "Oh, yes, My Queen," Xena moaned, her eyes heavy-lidded, the hoarseness of her voice betraying the depth of her arousal. "I look forward to your instruction." She added breathlessly.
* * *
Ephiny lifted her cup of wine in toast as the other Amazons around her did the same. "Gabrielle, we are always honored when you share your presence with your subjects, even more so with the upcoming occasion of your Bonding Ceremony. We drink to your continued good health and happiness. To her Royal Majesty Queen Gabrielle and her soon to be Consort, her Highness Xena." Ephiny finished the toast to murmurs of approval from the rest of the tribe. Xena just stared at the Regent, one eyebrow arching in suspicion at the toast. The warrior leaned closer to Gabrielle, who sat by her side nodding her thanks. "They're not really gonna start calling me Your Highness, are they?" Xena whispered out of the side of her mouth. "It's not so funny when it's you, is it?" Gabrielle shot back, the frozen smile still on her face as she continued to smile and nod. The party started to become exciting as the musicians came forward and the dancing started. Gabrielle was even able to entice Xena to share some slow dances, which the warrior enjoyed thoroughly. She spent the entire dance whispering some very erotic fantasies into her bard's ear, then enjoyed watching the young Queen's composure slip a few notches. A young Amazon made her way to the Queen's table and offered the Queen and her intended Consort another cup of wine. Gabrielle quickly held up her hand. "I'd much prefer some cider, thank you."
Xena smiled at her young lover. She knew Gabrielle fell asleep after two cups of wine and the young Queen had no intention of making it an early night tonight. The warrior reached for another cup, but Gabrielle quickly placed her own hand over Xena's and leaned in close to the warrior. Ephiny had a hard time keeping the grin off her usually serious face. Gabrielle lowered her voice to speak to Xena, but it was loud enough that the Regent picked up part of the message. The Queen simply wanted her Consort to have all her faculties for the activities they would enjoy later in their hut. There was something else Ephiny heard a piece of. It had something to do with the Warrior Princess and her brains being intact by the end of the night. The Regent snorted into her drink, but noticed that Xena quickly shook her head to the offer of additional wine. * * *
The Queen and her Consort enjoyed the evening's festivities for as long as they were required to, staying only as long as propriety dictated. It would look bad if the Queen left any party before the first guest did. The Regent took pity on her young friend and, even though she would have liked to stay and enjoy the party, she bade her Queen goodnight. It only took moments before Gabrielle and Xena did likewise. Once they were in their own hut, Xena wrapped strong arms around her future bride and placed a kiss on the smaller woman's lips that was as delicate as a light breeze. One kiss soon turned into many, but Gabrielle could feel that Xena was holding back her passion. She imagined that the warrior was trying to savor this last evening of intimacy by making it gentle and soft. She knew that Xena would try and do something like this for her. The young Queen, however, imagined a different night of passion in her bardic mind. Gabrielle realized her warrior would have to be seduced into the idea she had in mind, but she also knew that it wouldn't take much for the dark-
haired beauty to succumb. The young woman let her hands roam across the areas of Xena's body unprotected by armor. It didn't take long before Xena was moaning into their kisses. The young Queen initiated her plan with subtle moves intended to arouse the warrior out of her controlled passion. She started by nibbling slightly on the warrior's lower lip, but taking an extra firm nip as she pulled away. Gabrielle's lips wrapped around an earlobe, her tongue stroking the tender skin until she could feel Xena shiver within her embrace, then she bit down on the flesh until she heard the warrior groan with a sound borne of pleasure and pain. The small blonde took care to let her teeth, none too gently, tug at the taut skin of the warrior's neck, while her fingernails clawed a path up the back of Xena's muscled thighs and under her leather battle skirt. Small growls of pleasure escaped from the warrior's throat, as she pulled the young Queen closer, her touch becoming possessive and more demanding. Slowly Gabrielle pulled away and began removing the warrior's armor, until only Xena's leather shift and her boots remained. The dark-haired woman allowed herself to be led to a chair where she was directed to sit. The Queen knelt between the warrior's legs and quickly removed the heavy boots and protectors, massaging Xena's calf muscles until the seated woman's eyes were nearly closed. That's when Gabrielle made her desires plain. "What would the Warrior Princess desire this evening?" The young woman purred. It was only one sentence, but it's hidden meaning hit Xena like a white hot bolt of energy. It exploded in her chest and suddenly the flames were licking at her body, creating a heat that settled directly between her legs. The warrior's eyes snapped open to find Gabrielle still kneeling in front of her, the young woman's hands folded in her lap, her eyes bowed to the floor. Xena closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, then, leaning forward slightly she whispered in the small blonde's ear.
"Are you sure, my heart... is this what you want?" "Oh, yes... please" Gabrielle whimpered. Xena leaned hard against the back of the chair. She closed her eyes and mumbled. "Give me a second." The warrior needed to switch gears. Thinking she was about to be most lovingly ravished by her bard, she now had to swallow those emotions and release the Warlord Xena. That's the only time Gabrielle ever referred to her as the Warrior Princess. Xena's head was spinning at the curve she'd been thrown, but she could see the need in her lover's face and her own body said it had been too long since they played this little game. A few more deep breaths and the Consort to the Amazon Queen, was safely tucked away, and the Warlord Xena sat in her place. Xena's mind never forgot who she was or that this woman kneeling before her was her intended, not a slave she'd just captured, but the warrior's body became ruled by the Destroyer of Nations; the woman who took her pleasure where and how she pleased. This was the lover that Gabrielle wanted tonight, the sort of sensual memories that she wanted to carry her through the days till the next new moon. Xena reached over and as gently as she ever had, lifted Gabrielle's chin until the young Queen's eyes were held captive by the stranger's above her. The warrior's lips curled upward in a smile that spoke of seduction with a tinge of wickedness. The glint in the cerulean gaze made Gabrielle swallow involuntarily, and when a long, slender finger ran the length of the young Queen's jaw, Gabrielle felt a delicious trickle of wetness start its descent down her inner thigh. "I think I'd like a massage first." Xena said casually, willing her voice not to betray the absolute craving that was building up inside for this young woman kneeling before her. Gabrielle moved with grace and speed to gather a towel and some oils to be used for the warrior's massage. Xena slipped out of her leathers and
pulled her cotton shift over her head as she walked to the large bed by the window. She doused the candles closest to the window and opened the shutter to let in the evening breeze. Her mouth lifted in an evil grin while she watched as Gabrielle turned to see what the warrior was doing. The Queen wasn't in a position to argue even as she realized that the whole village would probably hear them through the open window tonight. The small blonde could feel the heat rising to her face as she heard Xena's chuckle. The warrior stretched her lean frame across the length of the mattress. Lying on her side, her head resting in the palm of her hand, she watched as the blonde carefully chose the scented oil she would use. "You are wearing entirely too many clothes." Xena's voice issued an unspoken command and she wondered how long it would take her usually obstinate lover to understand and comply. Gabrielle immediately put the items in her hand down and began to remove her garments. Once divested of all clothing, she stood facing the warrior, head down, arms at her side, as if waiting for approval to continue. In the meantime, Xena was finding the air in the room a little close. Oh, the amazing things that subservience could do to a Warlord's libido. "Come here." Xena's voice ordered. Gabrielle swiftly scooped up the items beside her and deposited them at the end of the bed, kneeling on the floor, eyes bowed in submission before her lover. With lightning speed the warrior reached out and grabbed a handful of the small bard's hair, pulling her head back so that her eyes looked directly into Xena's. Gabrielle saw the blue fire that looked like the inner portion of a flame burning out at her from her Consort's eyes and she obediently tried to avert her eyes.
Oh, yes... subservience. Xena felt the nerve endings along her skin begin to tingle. "When I tell you to come, it means to drop everything, not to finish your task first." Xena growled.
"Yes... forgive me, Mistress."
Ahh, obedience. Xena involuntarily parted her thighs, the luscious scent of her arousal causing the bard to clench her hands to keep from lunging at the woman. "It's good that you're so apologetic. We wouldn't want to spoil your perfect skin with the whip, now would we?" Gabrielle's eyes opened wide, the black pupils contracting to pinpoints. Xena had never used a whip on her bard before, but the soft length of leather was always within reach during their games. Gabrielle's body shivered, knowing that simply because Xena hadn't used it, didn't mean she wouldn't.
Gods... fear. The warrior was keeping a reign on her excitement up to this point, but suddenly a rush of molten fluid flowed from her eager sex and a simple massage was the last thing she wanted to settle for. She took the young Queen's mouth in a kiss that made up in intensity what it lacked in tenderness. Pulling herself up to sit on the edge of the mattress, she spread her legs wide and pulled the bard closer to her. "I've changed my mind. The massage can wait." Xena still had a grasp on the Queen's hair and she pulled the young woman's head so close to her center, Gabrielle could have stuck out her tongue and captured the droplets of her lovers essence that glistened there. "Please..." Gabrielle whimpered, her warm breath causing the dark-haired woman's body to shudder in delight. "I think you know what I like... and, how I like it." Xena commanded, finally releasing her hold on the young woman. Those words were the last coherent sounds either of the two lovers made until Apollo's chariot raced across the sky, carrying the fire of a new day in
its wake. * * *
The warrior groaned as the thin shaft of sunlight hit her between the eyes. She rolled over, wrapping the blankets around her, snuggling further into the slightly askew mattress. Sleeping in wasn't usually a part of her repertoire, but her body demanded the rest this morning. She felt an unconscious sense of loss and quickly realized that Gabrielle's side of the bed was empty. Xena half sat up to glance around the room and an audible groan escaped her lips.
Gods, am I sore! If I feel this way, I can't even picture Brie being able to walk. She was amazed the young Queen was already out of bed. Xena felt like a centaur had kicked her around. She thought back to the time she'd suffered through the Gauntlet, realizing that even the pain of cuts, bruises, and near broken bones couldn't compare to the morning after a night's passion with the young Amazon Queen. Ah, but the warrior wouldn't have it any other way. Xena winced and gave up on sitting, sprawling across the entire bed. She had just returned to a pleasant snore when Gabrielle walked in with a breakfast tray filled with food and drinks. The aroma of hot food wafted toward the prone woman and she raised her head, eyes still at half-mast. "Good morning, Sleepyhead." Gabrielle smiled as she brought a mug of steaming tea over toward the dark-haired woman. "Do you know how many seasons I've waited to use that expression on you?" Gabrielle asked, a smug smile of satisfaction lighting up her features. Xena groaned and gave a weak grin. "You're not human, you realize that don't you?"
Gabrielle laughed good naturally and set the tea by the bed. Xena reached for the young woman, but Gabrielle quickly moved out of arms reach. "Ah, ah, ah. Today starts our test of abstinence until our wedding night." "I only wanted to give you a kiss." Xena said with an evil smile. "Uh huh... well, I'd believe that a little more if you weren't completely naked." Gabrielle finished indicating the warrior's unclad form, sprawled across the bed. "What?" Xena arranged her body in a seductive pose. "You don't like what you see?" "Don't go there, Warrior." Gabrielle leaned closer until she was within inches of Xena's face. "Paybacks are a bitch." She swiftly kissed the top of her lover's head and moved back toward the table. "Drink your tea. Are you hungry?" The Queen asked as Xena wrapped the sheet around her and joined her lover at the table. "Starved." Xena replied as she fidgeted uncomfortably in her chair. "Gods, Brie... aren't you sore at all?" "Hades teeth, yes." Gabrielle replied quickly. "It was definitely worth it though." She smiled knowingly at Xena. "Thank you, love." "The pleasure was all mine. Well," Xena smirked, "maybe not all mine, but a lot anyway." They enjoyed a leisurely breakfast, something they were rarely able to do. When they were finished, Xena stood and grabbed a simple wrap around robe from a hook on the wall. "I'm going to go soak in a hot tub, want to join me?" Gabrielle just raised an eyebrow in frustration.
"Hey, we bathed together for quite a few summers before any of this." She indicated the bed, whose mattress was nearly lying on the floor. "You wouldn't think it would be so hard, would you?" She finished as if in answer to her own question. "Go take your bath." Gabrielle chuckled at the retreating form of her lover. "And, don't forget the interview today at the temple." "Be back in half a candlemark." Xena said before closing the door. * * *
Xena's body jerked forward and she caught herself from going under the water by reaching out a hand to the pool's rock ledge. She quickly scanned the pool area to make sure no one caught that smooth move. She hadn't been this tired in, she couldn't remember how long, and the steaming water relaxed her body to the point that she actually fell asleep. Not just one-eyeopen kind of sleep, but a dead-to-the-world variety of slumber. She leaned her head against the ledge and floated in the hot water. One eye opened in response to Eponin dumping her belongings on the ledge and sliding into the hot water. "Hey," Xena called out quietly. "Hey yourself." The Amazon stretched a little to work out some of the kinks that last night's party had left her with. "Gods, Xena." Eponin gasped. "What?" Xena asked as a hand went to her throat, following the direction the Amazon's eyes took. "You look like a wild animal attacked you." Eponin snorted in laughter, pointing out the bruises and red marks on the warrior's neck and chest. Xena closed her eyes and leaned back again, an ever so slight upward
curl of her lips the only sign that she was remembering last evening's passions with her young Queen. "I'm not so sure one didn't." The warrior deadpanned. "Oh, Hades, I have to go. I promised Gabrielle I wouldn't be long." Xena said pulling her body from the warm water. "Ka-ching," Eponin made a noise that sounded like a whip cracking in mid air, while at the same time imitating the same motion with her hand. Xena bent and reached for her robe just as the Amazon noticed the warrior's back. The dark-haired woman followed the Amazon's eyes once more and looked over her own shoulder to the upper portion of her back that was covered in scratches. "Oh," the Warrior Princess commented. "Did Gabrielle--" "Uh huh," Xena nodded. "Now, what were you saying?" The Amazon swallowed once or twice while the visual of that last though played across her mind's eye. "I... was... saying... what an extremely lucky woman you are." "Ep, you don't know the half of it." Xena chuckled, leaving the Amazon with her fantasies of her young Queen. * * *
"My, Queen." The high priestess bowed slightly to Gabrielle as the young Queen left an offering of scented oil and spices on the altar. "Will you and your Consort follow me?" Without waiting the woman turned and Xena and Gabrielle dutifully followed along behind the older woman as she led them through the maze
of hallways of the large temple. Amazingly enough, Gabrielle had been back into this private area of the temple for Amazon ceremonies before, but she was never able to remember her way on her own. She wanted to ask Xena if she would remember, but in the stillness of the temple, her own voice seemed like it would be out of place. Xena looked over at her young lover and saw the pensive frown on the small blonde's face. She reached out a sword callused hand and entwined Gabrielle's smaller fingers within her own. When the young Queen looked up into the warrior's face, her frown disappeared and was immediately replaced with a smile filled with the sunshine of her heart. The smile affected the warrior deeply and she couldn't keep herself from smiling back. The three women came to a stop in front of a large pair of doors. When the doors swung open without human assistance, Xena and Gabrielle knew they had never been to this part of the temple before. "Wait here, please." The priestess said. Gabrielle turned to say something, but the woman had already gone. "Well, that was... quick." Gabrielle said with a nervous smile in Xena's direction. "It's allright, Brie, relax." Xena responded by placing her hands on the smaller woman's shoulders and squeezing them lightly in a gesture of reassurance. "My Queen." The voice said seconds after a swirl of multicolored sparkles transported the Goddess Artemis into the room. "Artemis." Gabrielle said, quickly dropping to one knee. Xena raised an eyebrow, but continued standing, folding her arms across her chest. It used to bother her when Gabrielle did this, but the warrior had finally come to realize that Artemis was the Amazon's benefactor and by proxy, that made her the young Queen's patron Goddess. While Artemis
had protected the Queen and her Warrior on more than one occasion, Xena still had a difficult time ridding herself of her natural distrust for the Gods of Olympus. They were always after something and the proud warrior was there to see to it that something wasn't her bard. "Relax, Warrior. You came to see me, remember?" Artemis laughed as Xena realized, even with her concentration techniques, her thoughts had been utterly transparent to the Goddess. "Please, rise my young Queen. I think you're making your warrior nervous." Gabrielle stood and positioned herself until she was, once again, standing beside Xena. "So, you are finally to be joined." Artemis mused, sitting down in an oversized chair against the wall. "My sister, Aphrodite, is beside herself with joy, you know." She chuckled. "As a matter of fact, I'd like to drag Ares down here to witness the occasion." The Goddess watched the expressions on the faces of the two women. Gabrielle's seemed frightened, while Xena appeared sullen and angry. "Don't worry," the Goddess hurriedly continued. "I wouldn't ruin your day like that. You have to admit, though, it would be fun to rub his face in it." Artemis finished, all three women letting a slight smile play across their lips. "Gabrielle, I have a scroll for you that will make some of the rituals you will undergo in the next couple of fortnights, a little more understandable. I don't know what those women were thinking when they came up with that last set of scrolls." Artemis seemingly produced the thickly rolled parchment from thin air, handing it to the small blonde. Gabrielle smiled up at the taller Goddess, bowing her head in respect. "Have a seat here for a few moments, My Queen. Xena... come walk with
me in the garden." Artemis finished, walking away without waiting for the warrior's response. "I'll be allright." Gabrielle answered her lover's questioning look. * * *
"You seemed rather upset when I mentioned Ares coming to your wedding." Artemis asked the warrior as the two women walked side by side throughout the immense garden. "It's no secret how I feel about Ares and I don't like when he upsets Gabrielle." Xena replied tightly. "Well, aside from the obvious reason, that he's a low-life snake, why do you think he upsets Gabrielle?" "I think..." Xena started, but stopped abruptly. She couldn't believe she was about to confide in a God, but she might as well at this point, since Artemis probably read her thoughts already. "I think Gabrielle feels Ares might be able to make me a better offer someday. That he might be able to give me something she can't." "And, could he?" Artemis questioned. Xena stopped to stare into the gray eyes of the Goddess who was only slightly taller than she was. The warrior turned and looked back from where they stood in the courtyard. She could see through the open window where Gabrielle sat immersed in the scroll the Goddess had given her. The small blonde's brow was furrowed in concentration and she absently tugged at her lower lip while she read. The innocent gesture tore painfully at the warrior's heart. "No," she said as her voice broke. "In this life or any other, Ares could never offer me anything as compelling as that woman's heart."
Artemis smiled as she watched the warrior brusquely brush a tear from her cheek; Xena seemed embarrassed that she had lost her composure in front of this God. "Just remember, Xena, this is the woman of your heart. Misplaced anger has destroyed more civilizations than it has built up." Artemis said cryptically. Have a seat and relax, while I go talk to our young Queen." By the time Xena turned, the Goddess had vanished. I hate when they do that. The warrior sunk to a stone bench and waited for her lover's interview to be finished. * * *
"Were you able to discover anything important?" Artemis indicated the scroll in the Queen's hand. "No disrespect intended, but I think I've learned that it's a lot easier to get married when you're not a Queen." Gabrielle said bluntly. Artemis laughed and to Gabrielle's ears the sound reminded her of her own laughter. "I'm sure you'll live through it, My Queen. Tell me, Gabrielle. Why the fearful look when I mentioned Ares? I mean, aside from the fact that he's obsessed with your intended and a pathetic excuse for a God." Gabrielle chuckled slightly then her features grew serious. "It's just that I don't trust him when it comes to Xena." "Then shouldn't the question be whether you trust Xena?" "No! I trust Xena completely." Gabrielle returned fiercely. "I get afraid, though. I'm afraid sometimes that I don't have enough of whatever it takes
to keep Xena happy in this relationship. I'm not sure I can compete with someone like Ares." The bard finished and lowered her eyes to the ground. This was a fear that nagged at the young Queen for a long while, but it was the first time she was openly admitting it. She knew Xena loved her, but what if a better offer came along? "Gabrielle," Artemis commanded the young Queen to raise her eyes with her voice alone. "You already possess the most formidable weapon you'll ever need. Your heart." Artemis took a half turn and glanced out the window, looking out at the warrior, fidgeting nervously on a stone bench. Xena began to absently twirl her chakram around in her hand and the Goddess thought she better wrap this up or she might soon be missing the tall stemmed flowers the warrior began to eye. "Remember, My Queen, ultimate trust is not without its price. Sometimes when all those around you say a thing is black, it is up to you to say it is white. If for no other reason than because your heart says it's so." Gabrielle couldn't quite understand how the Goddess' words applied, but she smiled into the gray eyes anyway. "Now, go keep your warrior from decimating my garden." Artemis said and was gone before the Queen's eyes. * * *
Xena sat eyeing the long row of double red poppy's, flipping her chakram over and over. A bored warrior is a dangerous thing and this warrior was definitely getting bored. Raising her gaze up to the sky, she tossed a bit of dry grass in the air and watched it blow to her left. She looked at the brick
wall, the well, and the stone image of a deer. Finally she extended her arm and released the metal ring in a hard, swift motion. Gabrielle came down the garden path just as her Consort's weapon sliced evenly through three dozen flowers leaving their lonely stems bereft of their heads. "Hah!" Xena said out loud, a large toothy grin on her face. Just then the warrior looked up. Gabrielle stood facing the smiling warrior with her arms folded, her face pulling into a scowl as an eyebrow arched under her blonde bangs. She looked at the decapitated flowers, then at Xena. "Uhm... that was an accident." Xena quickly lied. Gabrielle shook her head and turned to leave the temple. A small smile found its way to her lips and she turned back to the dark-haired woman. "You wear me out, Warrior. You definitely wear me out." She chuckled. The Amazon Queen walked up the pathway that led out of the garden, as the taller woman jumped up, and like a contrite puppy, followed obediently along behind. Xena couldn't quite rid herself of her triumphant grin, or the sheepish blush that covered her face. * * *
Artemis removed her cumbersome breastplate and sunk heavily into a cushioned chair before accepting a glass of wine. "How did it go?" "Weren't you watching?" The Goddess inquired.
"You know I don't like to intrude on the privacy of mortals." The Goddess smiled at her brother. How very much like the woman she just left. "I gave them the information they will need. Whether they use it or not is up to them." "But, they're mortals. It's not fair to put them through this." "There are hard times coming for my Amazons. They'll need a strong Queen who has an even stronger Champion standing at her side. If it's not to be Gabrielle and Xena, I need to know." Artemis argued in return. "They're Soulmates, their destiny is together." The God gave the only reason he could think of to change his sister's mind. "You act like I'm responsible. It's the will of the Fates, Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos. I'm only lucky that those three owed me a favor, otherwise I wouldn't have been allowed to intervene this much." "Will they get past it?" Artemis looked out onto the lush landscape of the paradise that was Mount Olympus. She shook her head sadly at her brother. "I'm not sure that even these two will be able to get past the pain of this." She answered, walking from the room and leaving her wine untouched. * * *
"I still don't see why I can't ride out and greet them myself." Gabrielle complained, trying to fasten the cape onto the back of Xena's shoulder armor.
Brie, you're the Queen; people come to you, not the other way around. Visiting dignitaries to the Nation, have to be taken care of with a certain amount of formality, you know that. Besides, how do you think I feel? Frankly, I had no idea that the Queen's Consort had to be the official welcome wagon. Seriously Brie, am I really the first person you think of, when you think of diplomacy?" Xena inquired. Gabrielle laughed and slapped the warrior across the arm. She stood back and admired the tall warrior in front of her. Xena had given up her leather battle skirt for a silk shirt and brushed leather pants that tucked into her usual boots. She wore her same armor, but the shirt did a better job at hiding the scratches on her shoulders and back her young Queen put there two evenings ago. The cape was simply a part of the formality recognizing her as the Queen's Champion. Xena and Gabrielle walked hand in hand toward the center of the village. A young Amazon stood holding Argo's reins, waiting for the warrior to mount. "Your Highness," the young woman handed the mare's reins to Xena. The warrior growled under her breath and rolled her eyes at Gabrielle, who simply laughed at the dark-haired woman's discomfort. "Can't you order them to stop that?" Xena asked. "Yea, right! I'm having waayyy too much fun with this." The young Queen exclaimed. The warrior growled a low rumbling sound, starting deep in her chest. She wrapped an arm around her bard's waist and pulled her closer. "Just remember that I better be the only one you have this much fun with." She said with a twinkle in her sparkling blue gaze. Xena kissed the smaller woman and vaulted her body effortlessly into the saddle. "I'll be back before you know it." She said, reaching her hand down and
letting her fingers brush against the silkiness of her bard's cheek. She remained that way, lost in the emerald green gaze, until she abruptly pulled on Argo's reins and the rest of the welcoming committee followed suit. * * *
"Her Highness, Xena would like to welcome--" Eponin was interrupted before she finished. "Oh, I don't think we need to be quite that formal." A young woman of perhaps nineteen stepped forward from the circle of guards that protected her. "Well met, Xena, my name is Jordan. King Tralos is my father."
Once you meet her it will be apparent why she is to learn here... The King's words made sense as soon as the young woman stepped from the protective circle of her guards. Standing taller than any woman around her, she was dressed in a simple tunic, hunter's leather pants, and boots. She carried no armor or weapons, but held herself as one who had been trained in the art of self-defense. Xena felt herself smile as she took the offered arm in a warrior's grasp. She especially liked the woman's no nonsense approach. Oh, yea... she and Brie will get along wonderfully. "Princess Jordan, this is a member of the Amazon First guard, Eponin." Xena said as she started the introductions. "Princess," Eponin said before dropping to one knee. Jordan looked as obviously uncomfortable at the kneeling figure as Xena always was around the Amazon's servility toward royalty. Xena leaned toward the young Princess. "You can't get them to stop, believe me I've tried." The warrior whispered to Jordan's amusement.
"Xena, this is the Captain of my father's guard. Adrian--" "Yes, your majesty, Xena and I are old friends." The auburn-haired woman stood very nearly as tall as the Warrior Princess, but didn't have Xena's powerful body. She appeared more slender and carried her sword on her hip. She offered her arm up to the dark-haired warrior and her pale blue eyes seemed to laugh at the warrior's obvious discomfort. "Adrian." Xena answered tersely, swiftly grasping the woman's forearm, then pulling back just as quickly. Xena hated being surprised and this one definitely threw her. She hadn't expected to meet this woman again, especially not here, and most especially not when her joining ceremony with Gabrielle was only a moon away. "Shall we go, Princess?" Xena carefully covered her shaken demeanor with a smile in Jordan's direction. "The Queen will be waiting." Xena and Jordan moved off toward their respective mounts, leaving Adrian with a cold, fixed smile on her face. Well, if the Warrior Princess wants to
play it this way, fine. I wonder why she's trying to keep it a secret? After all, we were lovers for nearly a whole season. * * *
Adrian and Eponin rode slightly behind Xena and the Princess. The rest of the company rode in front of and behind the small party. "So, how long has Xena been an Amazon?" Adrian asked the woman who rode beside her.
"She's not." Eponin answered honestly. "She's the Queen's Consort. They're to be joined in one moon's time."
So that's why the cold-shoulder. You can't very well have your Queen knowing how you spent your Warlord years, can you? The Warrior Princess married... how very interesting. "So," Adrian said with a genuine smile, "tell me more about this Amazon Queen." * * *
"I hope my presence isn't too much of an inconvenience for the Queen." Jordan said to the dark-haired warrior who rode beside her. "Absolutely not," Xena tried to allay the girl's fears. "Gabrielle is looking forward to meeting you." "Tell me, Xena, what's it like to be an Amazon?" "I wouldn't know," the dark-haired warrior chuckled. "Oh, but when they introduced you, I thought..." Jordan stammered. "I'm not an Amazon myself, I only belong to one," Xena smiled. "Gabrielle will become my wife at the next new moon." "Well, congratulations are in order then." "Princess, have you never heard of me?" Xena asked, somewhat surprised at the young woman's ease around her. "I've heard the stories of the Warrior Princess, yes, but I've never heard them tell about the woman that rides beside me." Jordan answered.
Xena looked at the young woman and found that she liked this smart young Princess. She was struck at the young woman's physical resemblance to the warrior she had known all too briefly. Devlin had given her own life to see that Xena's heart was kept safe. The blue eyes and short cropped blonde hair that Xena looked at now, reminded her of that warrior who fell in love with the Amazon Queen and gave her life because of that love. "I've heard," Jordan said, pulling Xena from her thoughts. "That the Queen is a very beautiful woman." Xena arched an eyebrow at the young Princess' boldness. "Oh, I mean no disrespect, seeing that she is your intended." Jordan was quick to add. Xena laughed out loud at the young woman's panicked expression. "No offense taken, Princess. Besides, you heard right... she is." Xena rewarded the young woman with a smile that she reserved for those she felt most comfortable around. * * *
Xena could see the absolute awe displayed in the face of the young Princess. Gabrielle intended on making an impression, but little did she know how enamored the young woman already was. The throne was set up on the dais in the middle of the village, the Royal Guard, Ephiny, and Gabrielle all wore their leathers and ceremonial masks. "My Queen." Xena said bowing deeply much to Gabrielle's surprise. "May I present her Royal Highness, Princess Jordan. Princess, allow me to introduce you to her Majesty, Queen Gabrielle." In an instant Jordan dropped to one knee before the Amazon Queen as Gabrielle lifted her mask from her head. Even Xena's breath caught when
Gabrielle's emerald green gaze smiled down on the women. The young Queen, in the meantime, was wondering where in the world her lover had acquired such diplomatic skills. In the short amount of time it took for the Queen and the Princess to go from a formal greeting to a first name basis, Xena was sure of a couple of things. The first one being that Gabrielle would always make a wonderful ruler for these Amazons. The second was that the young Princess had a major crush going and Xena smiled to herself, thankful that this time it wasn't on her. While Xena gave some instructions, as to settling the Princess and her party into the guest quarters, Adrian was once again rebuffed by the darkhaired warrior. Xena wanted time alone with Gabrielle to explain things before she introduced the two women. Adrian simply chuckled at the warrior's apparent displeasure, watching the Amazon Queen stroll up to them. "Your Majesty," Adrian said to Gabrielle's approaching figure. Xena turned quickly and tried to lead Gabrielle away from the woman. "Aren't you hungry, love?" "Believe it or not, no." Gabrielle smiled. The Queen looked into her lover's blue eyes and watched as they bounced nervously around. She looked over at the warrior that came with the Princess' party. "Please, call me Gabrielle. Xe are you going to introduce us?" Gabrielle asked, slightly suspicious of why Xena seemed so ill at ease. "This is Adrian, Captain of the guard." Xena replied tightly. "She's an old... she's someone I used to know." Gabrielle hadn't expected that and she could tell by the way Xena looked down at her, that the warrior had more to say, but privately. Neither one of
the lovers were prepared for Adrian to take matters into her own hands, however. "It's an honor to meet you Gabrielle. I'm so glad you're not the jealous type. It could make my stay here rather difficult, to say the least. What's in the past is past, eh? But, then I'm sure Xena has already told you about us. Suffice to say, we were very young." The dark-haired warrior looked into Gabrielle's eyes with a mixture of apology and trepidation. God's, Brie, I'm so sorry. I never meant for you to
find out like this, my heart. "Yes, of course." The young Queen fixed a smile on her face and leaned against the warrior's body when she felt the familiar arm wrap protectively around her shoulder. Gabrielle felt as if she'd just been kicked in the stomach, but the proud young woman wasn't about to let this stranger see how very affected she was by this sudden news. Xena felt Gabrielle's body lean into her own as the warrior placed a comforting arm around her. Thank you, Brie. She silently applauded her lover for keeping her composure. The warrior knew that Adrian did this simply to get a rise from the young blonde and Gabrielle had no intention of giving in. Even though Xena could feel the warmth of the small body as it pressed against her own; she could also feel the stiffness of the bard's posture. Gods, this is going to be one Tartaurus of a fight.
PART II
THE DINNER GABRIELLE and her Amazons prepared for the young Princess and her entourage was extraordinary. Xena had little chance to catch her lover alone before the dinner started, and so their smiles seemed tight and forced. Xena was amiable enough and did enjoy chatting with Jordan. The dark-haired warrior was simply thankful that Adrian was seated at another table. When Adrian's eyes did capture Xena's, the warrior simply glared and unconsciously moved her seat closer to Gabrielle's chair. Gabrielle thought she was doing a good job, all things considered. The news had rocked her to be sure, but now she sensed Xena as being distant. Perhaps it was just the strangers that sat at their table, which caused the attentive lover in her Consort to go into hiding. There had been no time to talk, between the time she'd been surprised by this old lover of Xena's and the banquet. She tried to pretend that nothing was out of the ordinary, but she couldn't make her heart believe that. Suddenly she felt the familiar warmth of a hand grasping her own under the table. Gabrielle looked up into well-known pools of blue that drew her in. A small smile nervously appeared on the warrior's face as Gabrielle's quickly mirrored that action. Uncharacteristically Xena reached over and brushed her lips gently against her lover's forehead. Showing affection in public had always been difficult for the proud warrior, but she looked into Gabrielle's viridian gaze and the rest of the people at the table ceased to exist. For that moment there was only the two lovers. "I do love you, Brie." The warrior whispered into the smaller woman's ear. Gabrielle reached up and touched the warrior's cheek. They would still need to talk, but at least the two didn't feel so distant anymore. The two lovers became so lost in themselves and keeping their guests happy, they never saw the auburn-haired woman rise abruptly from her seat and leave the party. * * *
Xena sat in only her cotton shift, relaxing on furs and cushions in front of the fireplace. She watched out of the corner of her eye as Gabrielle removed her clothes, pulling a sleeping shift over her head. The warrior closed her eyes and took deep breaths, trying to pull her thoughts away from her lover's body. Their test of abstinence was only a day and a half old, but already the warrior felt a desperate need to feel Gabrielle under her. It was the forced celibacy that necessitated the need for sleeping shifts. Gabrielle walked to the fire, stopping to close a shutter on one of the many windows to the hut. The evening had turned cool and suddenly the warmth of the fire, and her lover's arms became a welcome idea. "Brie?" Xena held out her hand, waiting to feel Gabrielle's smaller hand in her own. The young Queen moved slowly and the moment her fingertips met the callused digits of her lover, a log split in two, popping loudly while sparks jumped within the stone fireplace. It only took a moment for Gabrielle to find herself wrapped in a strong embrace, her Warrior's warm lips kissing her temple. The small blonde felt shivers run along the length of her body. "Cold?" Xena asked. Gabrielle shook her head back and forth. She was afraid that once she heard her own voice speak this delicate spell would be broken. In this hut, here in Xena's arms, they were the only two that existed. This was the extent of Gabrielle's world. In this moment in time, neither woman had a past, nor was there ever anyone else to deal with. The young woman snuggled deeper into her lover's embrace. Xena felt her bard's body quiver once again. She smiled this time, realizing what caused the reaction. "Is it me?" She asked hesitantly
This time Gabrielle nodded without looking up. Xena wrapped her arms even tighter around her lover, burying her face in the sweet smell of her long blond locks. Once again the warrior repeated her words from earlier in the evening. "I love you, my heart." Gabrielle knew that the time for her silence was over. "Did you love her?" Xena pulled back and cradled the small face in her hands. "Gabrielle," the warrior drawled. The young Queen lifted her eyes to meet the azure gaze that burned fire into hers with its intensity. The bard adored hearing her lover say her name that way. She had a way of making it the most seductive sound in all the known world. "Gabrielle, I never loved anyone until I met you. I never even remembered what love was until you reminded me. And, I have never, ever felt for anyone the way I feel for you." Xena completed the statement with a kiss that was soft and passionate at the same time. "Oh, Xe, I'm sorry. I was just so angry--" "Honey, It's me that should be sorry. Adrian did that on purpose just to get a rise out of you." Xena tilted the Queen's face up to her own again. "Thank you for not giving her what she wanted. She can be a spiteful woman. I'm so sorry that she hurt you." They shared another kiss and Gabrielle nestled into her Warrior's strong arms once more. "Tell me, Xe... about Adrian." Xena took a deep breath knowing that Gabrielle would want to know. She rested her chin on top of the small blonde's head and closed her own eyes. There wasn't much to tell, but Xena found it easier to say if she didn't have to look into her bard's eyes. She had never yet seen the harsh glare of
judgment in those beautiful green eyes, but it was something she always lived in fear of. "It was the season before I... well, before I met Caesar. There's not a lot to tell. She was a warrior in my army. Not a great warrior, but decent enough. I was lonely and she was available. She didn't want to go to sea so we parted three or four moons before I ran into Caesar. That was all there was to it, Brie." "How long were you lovers?" "About a season, maybe less. Brie, we were never lovers in the sense that you might be thinking. She met a physical need and that was all. We never talked; we weren't close. It was only about--" "Sex." Gabrielle answered. "Yea." Xena said in a voice that was barely a whisper. "Thank you, Xe, for telling me. I know how hard that is. I also know you're not proud of that part of your life and you'd rather forget about it, but sometimes there are things I need to know." "I just get afraid sometimes." Xena said, her brows furrowing together and her voice becoming raspy with emotion. "I worry that someday you'll hear something that I've done and it will be so bad that you won't be able to forgive me." Xena finished as tears filled her eyes. "Xena, you don't ever have to be afraid of that happening." It was Gabrielle's turn and she soothed her Warrior with gentle tones and a loving touch. "The past can't hurt us anymore, my love. Not as long as we have each other." "Come to bed, Xe and let me hold you for a change." Gabrielle said rising and pulling the warrior along with her. Xena allowed herself to be enveloped in her bard's embrace. Placing her
head upon Gabrielle's chest, she listened to the steady, even heartbeat, its rhythm pulling her into the realm of Morpheus. "My heart," she whispered softly, just as sleep claimed them both. * * *
Gabrielle and Princess Jordan watched as Eponin finished leading a class of young girls in staff drills. Jordan seemed very impressed with the practice facilities the Amazons used. Adrian appeared to always be at her charge's side and this morning was no different. "I have to admit I'm only versed in hand combat. Everything I know was taught to me by Adrian." Jordan commented to Gabrielle. "Well, if the Queen is willing, I could show her a few moves. That way she wouldn't need a Champion to fight for her." Adrian said. The comment could have been interpreted as quite innocent, but Gabrielle saw the look in the Captain's eye as she finished. "Queen Gabrielle is already highly skilled in the art of self defense, especially with a staff." Eponin added, suddenly disliking the taunting tone in this stranger's voice. "Oh, is that so? Forgive me your Majesty, I wasn't aware that you were also a skilled warrior. Perhaps then you would care to spar with me. I happen to be rather well-trained with the stave myself." Adrian again taunted. To anyone else the conversation would have seemed like simple friendly banter. Gabrielle and Adrian both wore fixed smiles on their faces, their voices never raised above a normal level. The Captain kept prodding and Gabrielle politely refused. Finally Adrian struck her mark. "Very well, your Majesty. I guess I'll just have to allow the Warrior Princess
to show me a few of her moves then." Adrian said with a smug grin. The desired effect was attained. Gabrielle's eyes filled with a green fire at the innuendo in the woman's words. "Come on." Gabrielle said hotly, leading the way to one of the practice fields. "Gabrielle, is this a wise thing to do?" Eponin questioned the small blonde as she briskly made her way onto the practice area. "Sure, Ep. After all," the Queen looked in the Captain's direction, "it's just a little friendly sparring, right?" "Absolutely." Adrian said with a very serpentine smile. The two women walked onto the field as a helpless Princess watched. Eponin called a youngster of about nine summers over. "Go get Xena, she's with Ephiny on the far field." Hades, why me? The Amazon cursed to herself. * * *
"Your Highness?" the young girl called out as the Regent and the darkhaired warrior took a breather. Xena thought the girl was after Ephiny until she realized the youngster was looking at her. "What is it, little one?" "Eponin asked that I come for you right away. Queen Gabrielle is on the practice field." Xena and Ephiny looked at one another and immediately followed the young girl.
"You know it has been a week of no... well, you know," Xena said to Ephiny. "Maybe she finally snapped under the strain." Ephiny replied in a comic tone. The Regent and the warrior came up just as Gabrielle and Adrian were each doing a few warm-up routines. "I'm glad you showed up," Jordan sounded worried. "Maybe you should talk them out of this." "She's a big girl. If she gets her butt whipped it's her own problem." Xena said matter of factly. Jordan looked at the warrior in shock. "I would think that you would have a little more compassion for the woman you're about to marry. Is that how you think of Gabrielle?" "Gabrielle?" Xena's face expressed complete surprise. "I was talking about your Captain! Gabrielle is gonna kick her ass." The warrior chuckled. Sure enough, in three moves the young Queen had the Captain flat on her back. Gabrielle could tell immediately that her skill was far superior to the taller woman's. She stepped back, giving the Captain time to regain her feet once more. The small blonde looked over to see Xena watching with some concern and a hint of amusement on her features. When the warrior winked at her lover, Gabrielle knew she had the upper hand. Xena would have never let her continue if there was the slightest chance she would be injured. Gabrielle slowed the pace a bit. She was going to beat the smirk off this woman's face, and she was damn well going to enjoy it, too. Again and again the Queen knocked the Captain to the ground, but each time the auburn-haired woman refused to yield. She had a bloody lip and
her ribs would be a mass of bruises in the morning, but each time Gabrielle bested the woman, she got back up. A little slower each time until she groaned with the pain of rising. "Stay down." Gabrielle ordered as the woman rose to face her once again. Just as easily, Gabrielle took the woman's legs out from under her. "Yield!" The Queen hissed through her teeth. "I don't want to hurt you anymore. Yield." Gabrielle pleaded, her staff pressed close to the fallen woman's throat. "Never." Adrian sneered. "Very well," Gabrielle stepped away from the prone woman and threw her own staff to the ground. "I yield." All sound stopped as Gabrielle turned and walked off the practice field. Then just as suddenly those around the area applauded their Queen. Gabrielle stopped in front of Xena, a tiny grin on her lover's face. The Queen shook her head back and forth. "Some warrior's have such hard heads." Xena laughed and pulled the smaller woman into her arms. "Come on, killer... I'm hungry." She said as she steered her bard in the direction of the food hut. Adrian rose to one knee, holding her arms close to her left side. "That was some display." Princess Jordan said flatly. "Hey, I won." Adrian responded. "Then you're the only one in this village who thinks so, Adrian." Jordan replied, turning on her heel and walking away from the injured woman. * * *
"Mmmm" Xena moaned into her lover's kisses. "Gods, Brie... do you know how much I want you?" "Oh, Xe... you feel so good" Gabrielle said as she began to kiss the particular spot on Xena's neck that always caused the warrior to writhe in pleasure. Xena groaned at the feel of her lover's lips on her already heated skin. She pulled the small blonde's hips tighter against her, her own grinding down in an almost unconscious gesture of need. The warrior's hand began to knead a firm breast through the fabric of Gabrielle's shift. Xena could feel the nipple grow hard under the cloth. "Xena... we need... to stop." Gabrielle panted. "Oh, baby... not now." Xena groaned as if in pain. "Yes. Right now." "I know, I know. My head agrees. My heart agrees. It's just my body, that I can't get to go along with the other two." Xena responded between kisses. Finally the warrior pushed her body away from the small blonde's. Xena lay flat on her back, her forearms across her eyes as her chest heaved. Gabrielle's small body mirrored the warrior's as both women fought to get their emotions, and their bodies under control. "You gonna be okay?" Xena asked. "Sooner or later. You?" Gabrielle returned. "Eventually." The two women looked at one another and could only laugh at their predicament.
"Come on," Xena said jumping to her feet and scooping her lover into her arms. "Let's see if we can get some sleep without having to go jump in a cold lake. You are going to be the death of me woman, you know that, don't you?" Xena remarked as she slid under the sheets and cradled her lover in her arms. They shared a brief kiss, which only served to remind the dark-haired warrior of what she was missing out on. Her low growl rumbled through her chest and Gabrielle felt the vibration of it against her skin. The young Queen heard her lover's growls in every shape and form. There was the rumble of anger or intimidation, the sexy purr of seduction, and the growl, way back in her throat of lust and passion. The one she listened to now was definitely new. It turned out the reverberation in the dark-haired beauty's chest was simply the absolute sound of frustration. * * *
Gabrielle leaned her head against the high back of the Queen's chair, her tired eyes closing for a few moments. She thought she would just close her eyes while she waited for her tea to cool down. The few sounds in the food hut melded into the background as the small blonde felt herself falling asleep. Movement next to her alerted the Queen and she quickly straightened herself in her chair. Gods, if I can't get any sleep at night in
the same bed with my Warrior, I'm going to become a zombie! "Rough night, Queen Gabrielle?" Jordan smiled down and indicated the empty seat next to the bard with her free hand; the other wrapped around a steaming mug of tea. "Jordan, good morning, please call me Gabrielle, yes, you may sit, and trust me... you don't know the half of it." Gabrielle smiled at the young woman.
The young Queen noticed right off, the resemblance the young Princess bore to the warrior Devlin. Gabrielle chose not to say anything until Xena brought it up one night over their evening meal. Gabrielle was happy that Xena could think of the gentle blonde-haired warrior with fondness. The young Queen surmised it was Jordan's similarity to Devlin that had Xena treating the young Princess like a kid sister. It soon became apparent that Jordan had as much to learn from the Warrior Princess as she did from the Amazon Queen. So much so, in fact, that Jordan actually spent half her day with Gabrielle and at least a few candlemarks with the dark-haired warrior. Jordan looked a little rumpled herself, barely able to keep her own eyes open. "I hope you don't get offended, but you don't look that much better than I do." Gabrielle chuckled. "Well," a sheepish grin stole across the young woman's features, "a pretty Amazon asked... who was I to say no?" "Jordan." Gabrielle feigned shock. "I don't think I even knew what sex was when I was your age." The Royal pair smiled at one another conspiratorially. "Actually, I've found that sleeping alone can help one get a little rest." The Princess teased. "That's pretty much my problem. You see Xena and I, well we can't... we're not allowed to... oh, Hades this is embarrassing." "Gabrielle," Jordan said gently, placing her hand over the Queen's. "I know I may be a little younger than you, but I'd like to consider myself your friend." The young Queen gave the hand over hers a squeeze. "I feel the same way." "So, if I can help just by listening, well, sometimes it helps merely to be able voice certain concerns."
"Well," Gabrielle leaned closer to the Princess. The last thing she needed was the entire village knowing their predicament. Although anyone who had to deal with the short-tempered Queen or her Warrior lately, realized something was up. "Xena and I have to endure a test of abstinence until our wedding night. It's been a Fortnight and we're beginning to snap at each other, aside from everyone else around us. I never would have thought the denial would affect us this way, but here I am... a frustrated mess and Xe seems to be getting crankier by the minute." "Hmmm, I'm not sure I can really come up with any alternatives. Although, well, uhm... self-involvement does come to mind." "Jordan, if I become any more involved with my self, I'll forget how to do it the other way." The young Princess leaned back and laughed at the expression the Queen had on her face. "Oh, Gabrielle, I'm sorry, but you are absolutely priceless. Let me ask you, is that why you nearly took my Captain's head off yesterday? I mean, that and she was acting like an arrogant ass?" Gabrielle grew slightly serious. "Actually, Jordan, Adrian and I have been at odds since the day she came into the village. It seems she and my Consort have somewhat of a... history." "Gabrielle, I'm so sorry. You should have told me. I'll have Adrian sent back home immediately, I don't want there to be bad feelings between us because of that." "Jordan, consider this one of the lessons your father sent you here to learn. We can't always run from the difficulties in life. Sometimes we have to face them." It was at that moment that Adrian decided to enter the nearly deserted food hut. The auburn-haired woman sported a bruised mouth and cheek and it was apparent that she was nursing the left side of her body. She came toward the Queen like she had a purpose.
"Queen Ga--, Gabrielle," The Captain inquired haltingly. "I would like to take a moment and apologize to you about yesterday." "Apology accepted, Adrian." Gabrielle said perfunctorily. The Captain searched the Queen's eyes then, with a slight bow to both women she turned to go. After about half a dozen steps the Captain turned back. "You're not really accepting my apology, are you?" Adrian inquired. "Jordan, I wonder if you would excuse us? Adrian do you feel up for a walk?" Gabrielle asked. * * *
"This has always been a favorite place of mine." Gabrielle indicated a log the two of them could sit down on. "Especially in the spring, like it is now. Everything just coming to life again." Gabrielle remembered back to over a season ago when she and Xena had stayed in the Amazon village after the young Queen had been attacked. There were days that were so dark that the young woman didn't think she would ever see the light of another day. This was the small pond she came to sit by, watching the fish swim in lazy circles in the clear water. "You accused me of not really accepting your apology." Gabrielle stated. "I don't think you were sincere in your acceptance." Adrian's eyes never left the emerald gaze of the Queen. "I don't think you were sincere in your offering." Gabrielle countered. "I think you made the offer to save your job in front of the Princess, not because of any contrition you really felt toward me."
Adrian stared at the small blonde whose gaze burned with an intelligent fire far beyond her years. "What... what is it about you?" The Captain found herself smiling. She didn't know whether she was really asking the young Queen or trying to fathom the answer herself. "Your people love you, yet I understand you don't live here in the village year 'round. Any one of them would die, right now, defending your honor or your throne, even if you begged them not to. Your size can lull an adversary asleep, but you've got the punch of a bull. And, you've managed to take the fiercest warrior in all of Greece and wrap her around your little finger." Adrian stopped to shake her head. "I guess the thing that bothers me the most is that I find myself liking you when I really want to hate you." Adrian finished, surprising even herself at the honesty in the words. "I have to admit to that sentiment myself. It's not an easy thing to accept, that you knew Xena before I did." Gabrielle said. "Gabrielle, what Xena and I had back then, it was... well, it was what it was, nothing more than that. I see what the two of you share now and it's like she's an entirely different person." "She is." Gabrielle answered quickly. "I guess my pride had a hard time dealing with that. I do apologize, Gabrielle. That's not the kind of petty woman I am and I'd like to offer you my friendship, if you'll have it. I offer it to you and Xena. I hope you two have a wonderful life together." Adrian said. "I accept your apology, Adrian, and your friendship. I hope you'll stay with the Princess' party for the wedding." Gabrielle smiled. "I wouldn't miss it." Adrian returned the smile.
"Gabrielle?" The low alto of Xena's voice seemed strained and tense. Gabrielle turned at the sound of her lover's voice and found a glare on the warrior's face as she gazed at the two women seated on the log. The young Queen quickly stood and wrapped her arm around Xena's waist. "We've signed a truce." Gabrielle stated simply. "Well, good." Xena hesitated. "I thought you might like to share a midday meal with me." Xena asked, speaking to Gabrielle, yet looking back at the still seated woman. "Of course, love." Gabrielle replied. The two lovers left the small pond, not saying much until they were safely in the privacy of their own hut. "Wow, what did I do to deserve all this?" Gabrielle said, indicating the food that Xena had brought to their hut. Xena poured her partner a cup of cider before she sat down next to the woman. "Well, it's just my way of apologizing for being a little short-tempered last night." Xena sat softly. "Xe, it's okay." "No, Brie, it's not okay. I shouldn't be acting like a temperamental child just because I haven't had sex in a fortnight." "Allright," Gabrielle responded with a wry smile. "Why don't we just say that we've both been a little on edge and leave it at that. I know all these preparations, having Jordan visiting, and now this Adrian thing, well, they haven't done anything to ease the burden, have they?" "Speaking of Adrian, what were you two doing out there?"
"She wanted to apologize, for everything. Plus, she offered her friendship to both of us. I didn't want to believe her at first, Xe, but she came across as very sincere." Gabrielle finished as she began eating an assortment of dried fruit. "I still don't trust her, Brie. I know that sounds a little vindictive, after all this time, but it's a feeling I have. I don't want you to end up getting hurt again by my past." "Well, my hard sell Warrior, I don't trust her either. That's why I'm taking the advice of a certain Warrior Princess." "Which is?" Xena was intrigued. "You once told me the best way to keep tabs on an enemy--" "Is to invite him into your camp." Xena finished. "When did you get so smart?" "I think no sex must do that to you." Gabrielle countered with a mischievous grin. Xena leaned across the table to place a warm kiss on her lover's soft lips. Pulling back, her blue eyes seemed to sparkle with humor. "Frankly, I'd rather be dumb." Xena quickly countered. * * *
"Gabrielle, please ask her for me." "Jordan, it's not very attractive when a Princess begs." Gabrielle responded, tilting the candle in her hand while the wax dripped onto a scroll she held in her other hand.
"Oh, I don't know... that's not what I was told last night." Jordan replied with a grin that even made Gabrielle blush. The Queen raised an eyebrow at the young woman just as she finished pressing her amulet into the soft wax, sealing the scroll together. "Jordan, are you trying to sleep your way through my subjects?" "Wanna here what happened?" Jordan asked, teasing her friend. "No! The only thing worse than hearing about incredible sex second-hand, is hearing about it and not being able to do it." Gabrielle shot back. "Back to the subject at hand. Why don't you ask Xena to teach you yourself?" The small blonde inquired. "Because I know how she felt about teaching you the sword. When she told me about that she had such regret in her voice. I know she doesn't like teaching others how to kill, but I'm not a little girl, Gabrielle." "No, you're not, but carrying a weapon, especially a sword, bears certain responsibilities with it. Xena taught me a long time ago that the minute you pick up a sword, you're a target." "But, you know the ways of the sword, Gabrielle, and you don't carry one. That's all I want to be a confident ruler. Just to know that I have the skill to use one if ever the need should arise." "So, what's the real reason you want me to ask for you?" Gabrielle asked. "Well," Jordan hedged. "It's no huge secret that the Warrior Princess finds it hard to deny you anything." "Allright," Gabrielle couldn't keep from laughing. "Let's go find my Warrior." * * *
It became quite a heated discussion on the practice field that morning. Xena's usually reserved manner and Gabrielle's expected pleasant demeanor had been altered of late. Their sexual frustration was spilling over into their everyday actions. Even though they pulled apart from the others, you could hear their raised voices across the whole practice area. When it was finally decided that Xena would teach Jordan a limited amount of moves for her to practice, the Queen and her Warrior broke apart from one another without their customary kiss. It seemed as if they'd both been under more strain than usual. They lost their patience with those around them easier than they had in the past. Now, it was beginning to affect how they treated one another. There was one woman on the practice field that watched the exchange between the two lovers with enormous interest. She had heard the rumors about the test of abstinence the Queen and her Consort had been undergoing. She had a feeling that the Warrior Princess' libido couldn't hold out forever. She just had to maneuver it so she was the one around when the dark-haired beauty's inner time bomb exploded. * * *
"Don't you ever get tired?" Jordan asked the dark-haired warrior. "Okay, I can take a hint." Xena replied. This had been the third day that she and Jordan had been practicing and the young Princess had a natural aptitude for it. "Go take a hot bath, you smell." Xena smiled, wiping a sweaty forearm across her brow. Adrian tossed a waterskin at Xena. "Is it possible that you're getting better as you get older?"
Xena took a few mouthfuls of the water, spitting the last one out on the ground. "I think there's every possibility of that, but I think the more likely explanation is that you're just getting slower." The warrior laughed back. Xena tried not to give in, but she found herself liking this new Adrian. The auburn-haired Captain was polite and amusing. She talked to Gabrielle as a true friend and she sparred with Jordan and the Warrior Princess as good-naturedly as the rest of the Amazons. She and Xena were even able to share a few of their lighter moments from the old days. Of course, that didn't sit too well with Gabrielle. It seemed nothing Xena did lately was right with Gabrielle. They'd begun to fight more often than not. Last night had been the first time the two lovers ever slept in the same room, but not in the same bed. Xena made the mistake of saying something about how much Adrian had changed. The young Queen acted as if the warrior had committed a serious breach of loyalty. Xena ended up falling asleep, what little sleep she did get, on the furs in front of the fireplace. Gabrielle was wrapped in a blanket on the bed and Xena thought she could hear her bard crying, but for the life of the warrior, she couldn't make herself get up and apologize. It was like there was an unwarranted anger building inside her and it was being directed at the woman she loved. She didn't want it to continue, she loved Gabrielle, but she seemed powerless to stop herself. When she was away from her bard, she felt miserable about their petty squabbling, but when they were together Xena got a feeling of unease, not her usual experience of comfort and security. Xena promised herself she would talk with Gabrielle this evening and make her understand that she was being slightly unreasonable. With all the wedding preparations the warrior barely saw the young Queen during the day. The evening seemed to be the only time they had together and then they fought during that time. In the past Xena would try to secret the bard away during the midday meal, but now every time she surprised her lover, Jordan was there ahead of her.
Another sore spot. The amorous young Princess seemed to go beyond the call of learning by always hanging around Gabrielle. Xena began to feel that the young girl was beating her time with her future bride. Xena knew in her heart that was an unreasonable fear, but her head told her differently. The warrior lost a bit of control today, clashing swords just a little harder than she should have with her young protégé. She couldn't rid her mind's eye of the picture of Jordan and her bard together. She pulled up just in time, too; otherwise someone could have been seriously injured. Xena shook her head and turned back toward Adrian. She and the woman were the only people left on the practice field. The Captain said something that Xena must have missed, so she simply smiled back at her. In the meantime a very tired Queen left the council chambers, intent on a hot bath and the swirling waters in the bathing pools. Gabrielle pinched her brow together to try to forestall the headache she felt coming on. She thought she would concoct some of that Willow bark tea that Xena used that seemed to work so well. Maybe I can even drag Xe off to the baths
with me and apologize for last night. It was then that Gabrielle saw the two women standing on the practice field. They were laughing together and Xena reached out a hand to help the Captain to her feet. To Gabrielle's eyes, Xena held on to the Captain's hand a few heartbeats longer than was necessary. The small blonde's eyes watched their interaction before turning and heading off toward the baths alone. The young Queen's eyes weren't the only stares the pair brought about, as they joked with one another. The Queen Regent watched as Gabrielle turned eyes filled with hurt and pain away from the two warriors. The Amazon unconsciously clenched her fingers into fists at the side of her body. She continued to watch the two in serious conversation until they went their separate ways. Xena passed mere feet in front of the Regent, but the warrior practically ignored the Amazon. The dark-haired woman was headed for the bathing pools, a deep scowl etched on her face.
* * *
"You really gave the kid a workout today. I thought you were going to take her head off a couple of times." Adrian said from her seated position on the ground. Xena shook her head as if to get back into the conversation. Why was she having so much trouble staying focused lately? "Yea, I guess I was kind of hard on her." "Give me hand, will you?" Adrian held out an arm, which Xena grasped and effortlessly assisted the woman up. "You might want to keep an eye on her when she's around Gabrielle, though." Adrian stated matter of factly. "What's that supposed to mean," Xena sneered. Adrian quickly held up both hands. "Look, Xena, I'm not trying to start trouble, but I've known Jordan since she was a child. She has a way with women and she loves a conquest. She's just young enough to think that love is still a game. I'm saying that it wouldn't be the first time she started making moves on someone else's wife. I still have the battle scars to prove it too. We had to fight our way out of an inn at Pelios because the innkeepers wife became a little too enamored of the Princess' charms." Xena didn't say anything; but then again she didn't have to. Adrian knew what the warrior's temper was like these past few days. It wouldn't take much for her to explode. She could see the dark-haired warrior's brain working overtime. "Look, Gabrielle must not have seen us over here. It looks as if she's headed off to the bathing pools." Adrian commented in an offhand manner. The Captain never gave it a second thought when Xena stalked off in the
direction of the bathing pools. The place she sent her young protégé a quarter of a candlemark ago and the spot her bride to be seemed headed. * * *
"Gabrielle, are you allright?" Jordan asked. The warm spring baths were nearly empty at the end of the day. Steam curled throughout the cavernous expanse. In the center of the large cavern was one large, deep pool. Further back, smaller pools were elevated on stair-stepped levels. At the far end, water from a hot spring cascaded down a small waterfall, draining into the Queen's pool. It was here that Gabrielle sought her solitude. The afternoon sun had moved to the point where it was barely visible through the numerous round holes carved into the cavern's ceiling. The thick candles housed on the cavern ledges bathed the room in eerie shadows that flickered and jumped on the walls and the surface of the water. Jordan pulled herself easily from the large pool and wrapped a short robe around her body. "I'm getting a little worried about you. Maybe all these wedding preparations are too much. Don't you have someone that can help take a little of the burden off of you?" The young Princess inquired as she sat on the stone ledge to the Queen's pool. "I'll be allright, Jordan, thanks" Gabrielle replied, resting her hand over Jordan's. "I think I will ask Ephiny to help me out. I guess I'm just tired is all." "Well, if I'd known you came to bathe with my soon to be wife, I would have drilled you longer." Xena's low alto sounded ominous reverberating against the walls of the cavern.
Jordan turned abruptly, suddenly not sure how to take the frozen look in Xena's eye. The Princess looked between the two lovers, first looking at Gabrielle then back at the warrior. "Perhaps I should go." Jordan said. "Perhaps you should." Xena agreed. "I'll see you both in the morning." Jordan said before leaving the cavern. "I think you scared the poor girl." Gabrielle said as she watched Xena remove her garments and slide into the hot water. The warrior dipped her fingers into a hollowed out spot on the stone ledge that contained a soapy mixture. She ran it through her hair and across her body before submerging under the water again and breaking the surface in front of the young Queen. "Well, what was I to think? I come in and she's holding your hand." "Xe, it wasn't like that." Gabrielle answered as the warrior drew herself closer to the small blonde. Xena arms wrapped around the Queen's waist and pulled her body tightly against her own. She kissed the woman hotly, her mouth quickly swallowing any protest Gabrielle may have tried to voice. She moved her kisses down her bard's throat, Gabrielle's eyes closing to the pleasurable sensation. "Who do you belong to?" Xena rasped. "What?" Gabrielle pulled apart slightly to look on her lover's face, only it wasn't the face of the woman she loved. Gabrielle wasn't sure who this stranger was, but her eyes held a hard, lustful look that Xena had never fixed on her bard before. "Who do you belong to?" Xena repeated, biting a small portion of flesh on the Queen's neck before continuing. "Who does this belong to?" The
warrior said, cupping her hand over the blonde curls between Gabrielle's legs. The young Queen swallowed once and gave her response immediately. It would do no good to reason or question right now. "You, my love... it's all for you." Xena's eyes seemed to clear momentarily, and then she took the Queen's mouth in another scorching kiss, while her hands began to roam across soft flesh. Xena's hands moved to part the bard's thighs further apart. "Xe, please stop." Gabrielle whispered. The warrior continued on as if she hadn't heard the impassioned plea. Her fingers moved closer to their prize. "Xe, stop, right now." The dark-haired warrior had no intention of stopping and her body language made that apparent. She moved both hands up to grip the young Queen's shoulders to hold her in place. "Xena, you're hurting me!" Gabrielle cried. Xena froze, and then she released her grip, moving her hands and body back a few inches from Gabrielle's. She didn't meet her lovers gaze, but Gabrielle could see that the blue eyes of her lover had returned, although the eyes now filled with tears. Xena looked at the reddened marks on her lover's arms where the warrior had held her so tightly. "Gods, Brie, I'm so sorry... I--I don't know what came over me." Gabrielle could see that Xena's whole body was trembling. At first she thought it was from desire, but she quickly realized it was fear. The warrior was heartbeats away from committing the most unpardonable sin against her lover.
"Xe... Xena?" Gabrielle tried to get her Warrior to look into her eyes. She gently placed her fingers under the woman's chin. When Xena raised hers to the bard, she had tears streaming down her face. Gabrielle beckoned her into her comforting embrace. "It's allright love... shhh, it's allright." The young Queen held her Consort that way for what seemed like candlemarks. She too, realized what they had narrowly avoided. For the space of a dozen heartbeats, Gabrielle had no idea who the stranger in front of her was. Xena's body shook in absolute fear because she indeed realized who she had become. For that short space in time, when she was about to take her lover by force, simply because she could, because she owned her, she had become the Conqueror of Nations. The woman who took her pleasure whenever and wherever, with whomever she pleased. The blood in Xena's head pounded in rhythm to the erratic beat of her heart as she realized that for those heartbeats in time, she had absolutely no control over her body or her mind. * * *
"Xe, do you want to talk about it?" Gabrielle asked as she attempted to sit down by the uncommunicative warrior. "No. Gabrielle, I am so sorry, but I don't know what came over me... I don't know what else you want me to say." Gabrielle stood up and paced across the floor, her own anger at the situation was beginning to show through. "Dammit, Xena I want you to say that there was a reason you almost raped me tonight!" If there could have been a way for Gabrielle to mortally wound her Warrior, without striking a blow, that would have been it.
Xena's face looked like she'd been slapped, the words stunned her with their intensity. She didn't jump up and bolt from the room, slamming the door behind her. Instead she slowly stood and without looking up at her lover she walked outside, pulling the door closed, without a sound behind her. Gabrielle woke suddenly to the light of the moon shining into the hut. She had fallen asleep with her clothes on waiting for Xena to return. The warrior never came back, and as Gabrielle wiped the drowsiness from her eyes, she stood to go find her lover. Opening the door, Gabrielle didn't have to look far. Curled into a tight ball on the bench outside the door, was her Warrior. Her arms were hugged around her own body for warmth; she shivered even though the evening was warm. "Xe, my love... come in to bed." Gabrielle said, pulling the tall woman into the hut with her. "Gods, my head hurts, Brie." Xena said as she allowed herself to be led to the bed, her clothes removed and warm blankets wrapped around her. Gabrielle quickly made some Willow bark tea and helped the warrior to sip most of a mug before the pain began to subside. The bard removed her own clothes and held her lover in her arms, gently rubbing her fingers in small circles against the warrior's temple. It was quite a while before Xena finally relaxed into her lover's embrace, both of the women at last drifting off to the realm of Morpheus. * * *
Gabrielle opened her eyes to a gentle touch on her arm. When she focused her gaze, she found her Warrior leaning over her, a worried look on her face.
"Hey," Xena whispered. "Hey, yourself." Gabrielle smiled. That smile meant more to Xena than anything on this earth could. She didn't deserve her lover's forgiveness for her brutal actions of yesterday, but she breathed a sigh of relief when the absolution was offered. A knock on the door to the Queen's hut interrupted their thoughts. Gabrielle stood and pulled on her robe as Xena opened the door. "Morning." Jordan smiled at the dark-haired warrior. The young Princess didn't quite know what to make of Xena's moods lately, but she sympathized with the reason. "It's a little early, isn't it?" Xena said to the Princess in a flat, humorless voice. "Well, Gabrielle asked me to come get her this morning, the seamstress needs to do another fitting for her wedding gown and she's got a list as long as my arm of petitions to wade through." Jordan finished while Xena simply glared at her. "I'm sorry, Xe, I forgot about making it an early morning with Jordan." Gabrielle apologized to Xena. Xena's contrite demeanor seemed to change before the Queen's eyes, the warrior never taking her eyes off the young Princess. Gabrielle could see the tight line of the warrior's jaw clenching and unclenching as she ground her teeth. "Why don't you give us a few minutes." Xena said in a thinly controlled voice. The Princess looked at Gabrielle before the door was closed in her face. "I am sorry, Xe, I do need to get all that work done. It's all beginning to pile up on me with everything else I have to do."
"I understand your obligations, Gabrielle, but do you have to spend every minute of the day with her?" Xena hissed. "She's here to learn, I'm trying to be a good teacher." Gabrielle rose and stood toe to toe with her Warrior. "Just remember that being a good Queen is the only thing you're supposed to teach her." Xena sneered down at her lover. The slap to the warrior's jaw surprised both women. Xena could still feel the sting, her eyes narrowing, the blue color turning pale. Gabrielle didn't hold anything back with the powerful strike, her hand smarting from the force of the blow. The young Queen's eyes burned with a fire that was just as intense as the blaze that smoldered in the warrior's. Both women let their anger sweep them away; neither wanted to be the first to acquiesce. Xena raised her hand to her own temple as a stab of pain shot through her head. Gabrielle flinched and unconsciously moved back a step. The warrior's brow furrowed, her eyes darting back and forth as she watched her lover. "Did you think I'd hit you, Brie?" Xena barely whispered. Tears filled the Queen's emerald green gaze. "I'm just not sure anymore." Gabrielle replied in a voice so low that even Xena's hearing barely made it out. Xena felt a jolt of anger rush through her veins, coursing through her body until it settled as the furious pounding of her blood in her own ears. For a split second she did want to hit Gabrielle. That was the feeling that shocked the warrior into awareness. Looking down at the clenched fist that shook slightly, Xena felt her nails digging painfully into the palm of her hand. Realizing how close she'd come once more, the warrior turned and without a word she stalked out of the hut. She pushed Jordan out of her way, striding off into the woods. * * *
Jordan sat on a small stool not really hearing the young Queen and her seamstress in the corner of the hut. The Queen had given the Princess a petition to secure a judgment on, but the tall blonde was having trouble coming up with a solution that would be equitable. Gods, I'm going to
make a terrible ruler. While Gabrielle's rule didn't usually extend to anything or anyone outside of the Amazon borders, there were non-Amazons who leased land from the tribe, usually to farm its borders. Sometimes disputes arose and it was up to Amazon justice to prevail. Jordan put her elbow on one knee and cupped her chin in hand. She was finding it difficult to concentrate on a farmer and a plow that wasn't paid for. Her mind kept going back to the scenario in the Queen's hut about two candlemarks ago. Xena had looked at her like she wanted to run her through, it was the same feeling she got at the baths the other afternoon. The fight was so loud, the Princess moved off the veranda so it wouldn't look like she was spying. The slap that resounded from the Queen's hut caused the young Princess to move toward the building in a hurry. She stood on the porch ready to stop Xena if she had to; also knowing the warrior would probably kill her with one blow. Watching the dark-haired woman fly by her, Jordan noticed the red mark on her cheek. The Princess breathed a very audible sigh of relief that she wouldn't have to defend Gabrielle's honor against her own betrothed. Jordan sighed and shook herself from her musings. She wondered what kind of trick of the Gods could take two women who loved each other as much as these two, and turn them against one another so thoroughly. The Princess looked up and her breath caught in her throat. Gabrielle stood straight and proud in the gown that she would wear on her wedding day. "You're breathtaking." Was all Jordan could manage. "Thank you, Jordan. Now let's just hope I get to wear it." Gabrielle said
sadly as her eyes misted over in tears. "Gabrielle, I'm sure what you two are going through is just a little prewedding jitters. It seems perfectly normal." "Do you think so?" She sniffed, smoothing down the silk of her dress. "Sure." the Princess lied. Jordan couldn't bear the look of heartache on her friend's face. She could only hope Xena was somewhere feeling miserable enough that she would see what she had and come apologize. * * *
"Oh, yeah... right there." Xena groaned. How many times have you popped this thing out of its socket?" Adrian asked, indicating Xena's sore shoulder. "Lost track a long time ago," Xena grunted at the soothing feeling the Captains strong fingers were having on her shoulder, then her neck. Xena's breastplate lay on the ground at her feet, pulled off so that she could pop her shoulder back into its socket. The warrior closed her eyes and barely recognized that Adrian wasn't just massaging her injured shoulder anymore. The Captains fingertips began more of a caressing motion, slipping under the leather strap and pushing it off the warrior's shoulder in one swift move. Adrian bent down to the seated woman and brushed her lips against the bare shoulder. Xena moaned slightly and inclined her head as a non-verbal command to continue. Adrian cupped a hand over the warrior's breast and could feel the nipple grow hard even through the thick leather bodice. Finally, she pulled the warrior to her feet and pressed her mouth hard against Xena's, backing the dark-haired woman against a tree.
Xena felt herself slip away to Gabrielle's caress. It was odd, but they didn't feel like Gabrielle's fingertips on her skin, but the sensation was only one caused by the warrior's lover. The hands caressing her grew strong and forceful. Gabrielle never had to demand; she knew Xena always gave in to her exquisite touch. At last, lips covered Xena's own, hot, imperious, searching. The sensation was purely sensual, but the warrior felt her brow furrow in confusion. She must be dreaming because the terrible pounding in her head was gone. Gabrielle's lips never felt like this when they made love. They were never rough and cruel. Xena's eyes finally opened. These were not her bard's lips! "What in Hades do you think you're doing?" Xena rasped, pushing Adrian away from her with a force that the Captain didn't think she was capable in her state. "Don't pretend anymore, Warrior Princess. You know you want this as badly as I do." Adrian pressed her lips firmly against the warrior's. Xena abruptly pushed the woman away and held her at arm's length. Her brain was still foggy and she was having trouble switching gears. "Excuse me," Ephiny's voice pulled Xena's eyes to where the Regent stood leading her horse. "Just thought I'd get away from it all, didn't know someone beat me to it." Ephiny continued to move, shooting a withering glance at the warrior who still had both her arms around Adrian's shoulders. Xena roughly pushed the smirking Captain away from her. She quickly grabbed her weapons and armor and ran to catch up with the Regent. "Eph, that wasn't anything like what you saw back there." Xena explained. Ephiny stopped and turned to face the warrior. "Xena, you've become a good friend over the seasons, but remember one thing. Gabrielle is my friend too, more than that she is my Queen. Don't think for a moment that I will allow you to hurt her. She deserves better than that Xena, especially the
fortnight before her wedding. Don't break her heart." Ephiny finished, turning to leave. "I would never betray Gabrielle." Xena said pulling on the Regent's arm to stop her. Ephiny looked down at the strong grip that held her forearm. "I swear, if you do, Xena... there won't be a place far enough away for you to hide from me." Ephiny whispered the threat that made Xena release the Amazon's arm and step away. * * *
"I'm sorry, Brie," Xena whispered, nuzzling the back of the soft blonde hair of her bard. Gabrielle sat at the table in the hut they shared, her back to the closed door. She put down the scroll she was reading and reached up to entwine her fingers within the warrior's ebony locks. The long hair was damp and smelled faintly of cinnamon. "I'm sorry too, Xe. Seems like we spend a lot of time saying that lately." "Yea, I know." Xena replied softly. "I missed you for the evening meal." "I was soaking in the baths. Thought you wouldn't mind me staying out of your hair." Xena said wryly. Gabrielle rose and turned to embrace her lover. The kiss they shared was the gentlest act they had experienced in weeks. The bard kissed the warrior's jaw where she placed the stinging slap earlier that morning. The Queen froze at the sight of the bruise at the base of her Warrior's throat.
"Did it get a little rough on the practice field today?" The Queen asked in a tight voice. Xena's hand immediately went to the mark on her neck. She reflexively covered the bruise with her hand, reminded that the small bite and red mark was from Adrian's mouth. She'd seen her reflection in the baths and thought that perhaps Gabrielle wouldn't notice. The warrior should have known better. "Brie, let me explain." "Oh, now you want to talk. Perhaps if you'd done more of that earlier, you wouldn't have this!" Gabrielle shot back. "Gabrielle," Xena drawled in her warning tone. The warrior wanted to tell her lover what had gone on today and that Adrian's trusting little friend routine was a ruse, but Gabrielle was being unreasonable again and that accursed pounding was back in her head. "Are you going to let me explain, or act like a child?" Gabrielle seethed at Xena's reference to her. She wanted to slap her and a whole lot more this time. "I at least hope your neck was the only part of your body that she made a meal of." "Oh, Hera's tits, this isn't even worth it!" Xena exclaimed as she turned and walked out, slamming the door soundly behind her. * * *
A knock on the door to the Queen's hut brought Gabrielle from her thoughts and back to the here and now. Xena never came home last night and as much as Gabrielle didn't want to believe that her warrior would ever betray their love, she just didn't know anymore.
"Come in," The Queen called out, clasping together her belt that was more decoration than functional. "Morning," Eponin smiled, coming into the room. The Amazon noticed the red, puffy eyes and could tell what Gabrielle spent most of her night doing. "She spent the night in my hut. I figured you'd want to know that she wasn't out, well... we just had a few skins of wine and she eventually passed out." Eponin finished. "Thanks, Ep... I owe you one." Gabrielle said in a broken voice. "You're damned right you do," the Amazon said as she turned to leave. "She snores!" Eponin winked before closing the door. * * *
Gabrielle finally finished her tiring day. There was a bustle of activity in the center of the village as she passed by. Today was Jordan's twentieth birthday and she was being given a party this evening. Gabrielle made her way back to the Queen's hut and opened the door. To her surprise the room was darkened, candles flickering in the low light. Xena, who always faced the door of a room, lay stretched out in a steaming tub of water. The warrior's head was tilted back, her eyes half closed. Seeing her warrior like this, relaxed and calm, the day's previous anger and tension seemed to melt away. Xena's eyes opened fully and her sapphire gaze told Gabrielle all she needed to hear. "Is their room in there for me?" Gabrielle asked. "Absolutely." Xena replied. Gabrielle started to move off to the other end of the hut to remove her garments.
"Please, let me watch you, Brie." Gabrielle turned at the sound of her warrior's voice. The intensity of Xena's blue gaze drew Gabrielle back in front of the woman and she slowly began to remove her clothes. Xena watched as the young Queen slowly let her garments fall to the floor. As Gabrielle stepped closer to the tub, Xena extended her hand in invitation. Gabrielle excepted the offered hand and moments later found herself wrapped in the strong embrace of her warrior. Gabrielle sat between Xena's parted legs, her own head leaning back, resting upon the warrior's shoulder. Xena placed a feather light kiss upon every area of Gabrielle's exposed body. She ran a sponge along Gabrielle's fair skin, more caressing taking place than actual washing. Gabrielle ran her hands along the top of the warrior's muscled thighs, letting her fingertips barely graze the inner portion of the dark-haired woman's legs. Xena let out a sigh at the touch and with an arm slipped around Gabrielle's waist; she pulled the smaller woman's body closer against her. Xena began a simple exploration of her lover's body, her fingertips leaving long trails of fire along the young Queen's skin. Xena's moves were slow and deliberate, taking the time to make a memory of the feel and the taste of her lover's skin. The warrior's heavy-lidded expression wasn't only from the state of pleasure she felt. She had to drink three mugs of Willow bark tea, adding a slight pinch of a heavier painkiller to the draught before the pain in her head subsided to a slight throb. The warrior's hands took gentle possession of the Queen's breasts, cupping them so lightly, the hard points of flesh barely tickled her palms. Her lips and tongue grazing the length of her lovers ear, she softly whispered the words that Gabrielle's heart ached for. "Only you, Brie... No one else." Gabrielle let out a small moan as Xena's lips blazed a trail down the young woman's neck, stopping to let her tongue caress the erratically beating
pulse point. The Queen placed her hands over the warrior's, pressing them against her breasts in a firm, insisting manner. Xena was breathing hoarsely now, her kisses becoming more purposeful in their intent. She released one hand from its prize and used her fingertips to guide the small blonde's head to tilt back in her direction. Her mouth covered Gabrielle's in a kiss that spoke of desire and passion, and when their tongues touched, it was like a release of energy bounced back and forth between the two. "Gods, Xe, I don't want to stop." Gabrielle groaned in frustration. Xena's free hand led Gabrielle's across her belly, stopping just above the honey colored curls. Xena's hand moved away as she whispered. "Touch yourself." She gently commanded. "I--I don't know if I can." Gabrielle responded breathlessly. In all their lovemaking, the two had never shared this before. "Please, Brie. I want to watch you." Xena pleaded in a sultry voice. Xena brought her hands up once again to caress Gabrielle's breasts, her fingertips drawing small circles around the pale pink, pebbled flesh. She grasped the hard nodules between thumb and forefinger, squeezing and pulling at the same time. Gabrielle gasped as her head fell back against Xena, her fingers unconsciously sliding into the slick folds of her sex. Feeling her fingers stroking her own flesh while her lover gazed down the length of her body caused a wetness to cover her hand that had little to do with the water that surrounded them. Xena leaned back against the high wall of the tub, pulling Gabrielle to lie against her. She spread her own legs wide apart allowing Gabrielle the access she needed and the warrior, the view she desperately desired. The dark-haired woman turned her head, nuzzling her face into the intoxicating scent of her lover's hair.
Gabrielle could feel the hard points of aroused flesh that pressed into her back. She watched as Xena clutched the outside rim of the tub to keep her hands away from temptation. The warrior's knuckles grew white with tension. Gabrielle could feel the warrior's warm, ragged breath in panting spurts against her neck and blowing into her ear. Gabrielle could stand the slow torture no longer. She spread her lips apart and placed two fingers at her opening, teasing the wet flesh. Her thumb began to flick across the swollen bundle of nerves at the top of her cleft and she found her hips rocking against the sweet sensation. Xena began moaning and suddenly the Queen felt the warrior's hand reach between their bodies and bury itself in between her own dark curls. Both women were moaning and rolling their hips as they brought themselves closer to their own climax. Gabrielle was the first to feel the waves of pleasure crash around her. Xena's eyes snapped open as she felt the first tremors of her lover's orgasm begin. The moans of pleasure accompanied by the quivering body against her sent her crashing over the edge moments later. "I sure hope that doesn't get us in trouble with Artemis." Xena commented dryly when she finally had her breathing leveled out. Gabrielle laughed and let her lover wrap her arms tighter around her. The only disturbing note was that she just now realized that was the first humorous thing her often, dry-witted warrior, said in weeks. The warrior lifted the smaller women from the tub easily, drying her off with a delicate touch, and then the two lay down on the bed and fell instantly asleep. * * *
"Xe, honey, we need to get ready for the party." Gabrielle whispered in her
sleeping lover's ear. Xena groaned when she opened her eyes. The pounding in the warrior's head returned with a vengeance. She sat on the end of the bed and lightly massaged her temples. "Xe, is your headache back again?" Gabrielle asked, with concern. "Yea." Xena groaned. "Maybe you should see one of the healers." Gabrielle said. "It's just a headache, Brie." Xena responded gruffly. Gabrielle turned away from the warrior and Xena immediately regretted her harsh words. She fought to push back down the anger that seemed to be rising abruptly from nowhere. Xena's eyes watched as Gabrielle spun away. "I promise, first thing in the morning. If I still have this pain I'll go see Sartori." Xena managed a weak smile. Gabrielle returned her lover's smile and let the backs of her fingers glide gently across the warrior's high cheekbones. The Amazon village breathed a collective sigh of relief when they saw the Queen and her Consort join the party hand-in-hand. In a small village such as this, it became hard to keep relationship woes a secret. Ephiny was still the only one, however who was aware of the illicit kiss shared between Adrian and Xena. Xena wanted to tell Gabrielle about Adrian's forced kiss, but there never seemed to be a good time. The two were sharing what seemed like a precarious truce right at the moment and Xena didn't want to do anything that might topple their house of cards. The pounding in Xena's head grew stronger as the night wore on. She switched from drinking Amazon wine to the stronger port in hopes that she could beat the pain back to a dull ache. The laughter from those around her and the beating of the drums did nothing to ease her discomfort.
Adrian came up to the Queen and tried to entice her into a dance. When Gabrielle politely refused, Adrian made the same offer to Xena. The warrior simply glared at the Captain of the Guard and the auburn haired woman walked off smiling. "What was that look all about?" Gabrielle asked. "I'll tell you later." Xena said shortly. "Is there something I should know about?" "I said, I would tell you about it later." Xena hissed, instantly regretting the way her words came out, but finding herself unable to stop them. "Fine." Gabrielle answered in a tight voice. The young Queen rose from her seated position next to the warrior and joined a group of young Amazon's surrounding Princess Jordan. Xena watched as her intended laughed and joked with her subjects. The small blonde always seemed to have a smile for everyone and that was part of her charm. Most times Xena would watch the young Queen and become mesmerized by her ability to beguile those around her. This was not one of those times however. The more Xena's head hurt, the more quickly she began to consume large mugs of port, which hastily began to cloud her perception of Gabrielle's activities. Xena's eye became heavy lidded, as she leaned forward, her shoulders slumping. The Warrior Princess never let her eyes leave the graceful form of her Queen. The blue orbs burned with an electric fire as she watched Princess Jordan lead Gabrielle into a slow dance. Part of Xena's brain fought to tell her that her anger was misplaced, but that tiny voice could barely be heard over the incessant pounding in her skull. Had she been a little less inebriated, she would have stood and challenged the Princess as the Queen's Champion. As it was however, she had to narrow her gaze just to be able to focus on the two dancing women. The warrior simply brooded and continued to consume the alcohol before her at an
alarming rate. Gabrielle thanked Jordan for the dance, turning down the offer of another. The young Queen watched as the evening wore on and her warrior became more sullen and uncommunicative. Gabrielle went about the evening mingling and socializing with the other Amazons; always keeping one eye fastened on the still seated warrior. Once the party had dwindled down to a scattered few, the young Queen braced herself to approach her now drunken warrior. "I think I've had all the party I can handle for one evening. Xena?" Gabrielle asked gently. It was late and Gabrielle desperately wanted not only to go to bed, but also to be alone with her warrior. The Queen watched as those around the table looked to see what Xena's response would be. Adrian, Eponin, and two or three other warriors sat at the long wooden table. Xena knew that the best thing for her right now would simply be too allow her Queen to assist her in returning to their hut. She could barely stand and she didn't have to look up to realize that Gabrielle's eyes were very nearly pleading with her. Leaving would have been the reasonable thing to do. Of course, the amount of liquor the warrior had consumed during the entire evening left her feeling anything but reasonable. "I haven't finished my port, I'll be there shortly." Xena replied gruffly without looking up. Gabrielle's pride wouldn't allow her a hurt or humiliated look. She stood there for a few heartbeats, willing her warrior to look up and into her eyes. Xena's gaze however was fixated into the bottom of her mug. The young Queen was left in the position where all she could do to save her dignity was turn and walk away. * * *
It started out as a drinking game. Solari was the first to go, then Eponin, until the only two combatants left upright were the Warrior Princess and her nemesis. Xena made a move for her mug and, seeing three of them on the table before her, grabbed at the one in the middle. Unfortunately, her depth perception being what it was at this point, the mug tipped over, the contents of the cup spilling onto the table. "Here, I'll pour us one more to get home by." Adrian slurred, placing a full mug in front of the warrior. "Bottoms up." The Captain raised her glass and downed the whole mug in three long swallows, encouraging Xena to do the same. Xena knew she had to get herself in motion. Gabrielle would be mad as Tartaurus as it was. The warrior pushed herself away from the table and walked, moving more sideways than forward, the twenty feet to the horse's trough. She kneeled herself in front of the basin and dipped her face into the cool water. Leaning heavily on the stone trough, she felt the pounding in her head escalate to the sound of a thousand hoofbeats. She tried to rise from her kneeling position on the ground and suddenly felt her knees go out on her. Besides the noise in her ears, her eyesight narrowed until it felt as if she were looking through a tunnel. Half-lying on the ground, she felt as if something came flying into her brain and exploded into a chaos of sound. "Hey, Warrior Princess, let me give you a hand." Adrian said, attempting to help Xena, but not much steadier on her own feet. "Thanks... I--" Xena shook her head, but the cobwebs remained. "Need ta get home." She slurred heavily. "Queen's hut, huh?" Adrian asked. Xena could only nod; her power of speech seemed to be absent. Her brain knew what she wanted to say, but the thoughts wouldn't filter down to her tongue. She looked at Adrian and for a moment and thought she looked
just like Gabrielle, but that wasn't right either. She remembered that she should be mad at Gabrielle, but couldn't think why... mad at Adrian or Gabrielle... why? She fell heavily to one knee, bringing Adrian along with her. "Shit, warrior, work with me here a little." Adrian rasped, trying to lift the nearly dead weight of the warrior off toward the huts. * * *
Xena sat up sharply from her prone position. She had passed out, but the sharp pain in her head brought her to with a start. "Sssh, you're okay." "Brie?" Xena questioned. The haze in front of her eyes made it difficult to make out her lover's form. "Yes, love." The voice answered. Xena felt the soft, naked flesh of her lover move on top of her. Soon she felt exquisitely soft lips on her skin, teasing, biting and sucking all the flesh they came in contact with. The warrior knew there was a reason they shouldn't be doing this, but suddenly her body felt like it was floating along in mid air. She wasn't even sure if she was moving her own arms, but her brain said she had. She kissed the woman above her, letting her lover take possession of her mouth in a way she never had before. The mouth left hers and sucked hard on the taut flesh of her neck. "Gods, Brie." Xena groaned. Adrian lifted her body up and tossed her hair from her face with a shake of her head.
"Whatever you want to call me... it works for me." The Captain leered at the naked woman below her. * * *
"No one seems to know where she went." Ephiny said to Gabrielle. "I send for Eponin, she was there, she'll know." The Regent finished in that reassuring tone the Amazon always seemed to reserve for her small friend. Two of the Royal Guard walked in practically holding Eponin up between them. The drunken Amazon was soaking wet. It was apparent the Guard had been given orders to get the warrior awake enough to talk to the Queen. It looked as if a midnight swim in the cold lake had done the trick. "Ep," Ephiny pulled the warrior's chin up to meet her eyes. "Where's Xena at? Wasn't she with you?" "Uhm... we were playing sworzz," she answered. Gabrielle looked confused and Ephiny rolled her eyes. "She means, swords." She said to the Queen. "It's a drinking game." "Ep, what happened? Who else was there? Were you there when Xena left?" The Regent questioned. "Yea, I mean no. Uhm, me and Sol. Oh, and Adrian too, I think. I--I don't know where they went... sorry, Gabrielle." "It's allright, Ep, go get some sleep." Gabrielle said, looking at the Guard and motioning them to help the warrior back to her own hut. Once the Queen and her Regent were alone Ephiny began to pace the room. "I'm going over to that slut's quarters and I swear, Gabrielle, if Xena is there I'll--"
"You'll do nothing." Gabrielle said as she looked out the window into the village. "What? Gabrielle--" "Eph, please. Let me do this my way." Gabrielle's voice shook and it was obvious to the Regent her small friend was trying to hold on to some semblance of dignity through the whole ugly situation. "Gabrielle, at least let me go look and see if Xena is there. I guess something actually could have happened to her and we need to know if she's hurt somewhere or not." The Queen nodded. "If she's not there, come and get me so we can form a search party right away." "And, if she is there?" Ephiny asked. "You're to do nothing tonight." Gabrielle held up her hand to stop the Regent's protests. "Eph, if Xena is with Adrian, she went there of her own will. If that is what's to become of us every time we run into one of her old lovers, then I suppose it's better we find out now." "Gabrielle, I'm so sorry." Ephiny turned to the young Queen before she left, giving her a strong hug. When the door closed behind the Regent Gabrielle stood in the middle of the large room alone. She looked very small and felt nothing like a Queen. She felt like her own death was beginning. She crossed the room and sat in the chair that faced the open window. After a candlemark of time had passed her gaze fell on Xena's weapons and armor, placed neatly beside the bed as always. Ephiny hadn't returned and so the Amazon Queen sat and waited, shedding no tears, instead willing her body to wait until it was safe to fall apart.
* * *
Xena rolled over and fought off the nausea that rose and threatened to overtake her. Her eyes could barely open and her head felt like it teetered ominously on her shoulders, but she knew last night she would have one Tartaurus of a hangover this morning. "Brie?" She nudged the still form next to her. "Gods, go away and lemme sleep." Xena's eyes were open now. She flew out of the bed so fast she felt as if she'd left her aching head behind. Once her brain registered the fact that it was Adrian's naked body in the bed, she looked around the room and for the first time realized she wasn't in the Queen's hut. Then she realized she too was naked. "By the Gods, what have I done." She croaked. The warrior threw on her clothes and boots and made it out the door just in time to lose the contents of her stomach over the porch rail. Her muscles continued to heave until the alcohol she consumed the previous evening was expelled. Rising cautiously, she noticed the sun was barely rising. The warrior made her way to the stables to try to clean up before attempting to enter the Queen's hut. Xena removed her shirt and dunked her whole torso into the barrel of rainwater around the back of the stable. She looked down at her own body and cringed when she saw the evidence of her betrayal. Her chest and breasts were covered in bruises and bites and, she could see in the water's reflection, that her neck wasn't any better off. Her hands shook and she knew the nausea she now felt had nothing to do with a hangover. She had betrayed Gabrielle in the worst way possible. Not only a lover's deception, but the humiliation the young Queen would
suffer in front of her people. "Oh, Gods..." Xena bent over the barrel. "Artemis, please help me." The warrior uncharacteristically prayed. "Oh, Brie..." "Maybe you should have thought of her last night." Ephiny said from inside the stable. Xena quickly reached for her shirt, but it was gone. Ephiny held out the cloth and Xena snatched it from her hand. The warrior covered her body as quickly as she could, turning her back to the Regent's disgusted look. "I don't remember what happened... I was drunk." "You're right, you could barely stand. Oh, but it doesn't take a whole lot of standing to get fucked now, does it?" Ephiny sneered. Xena pushed past the Amazon to go back to the village. They were nearly in front of the Queen's hut when Ephiny's voice rang out. "I warned you Xena. I told you not to hurt her." Ephiny said in a throaty ominous tone. "I didn't mean to... I don't remember!" Xena turned back just in time for Ephiny's backhand to connect with the warrior's mouth. It rocked the warrior back a step, but she didn't even raise her hand to protect herself from the next blow or the next. It was a small enough punishment for her crime. "Stop." Gabrielle's voice cut through the discord. Ephiny's arm was raised in mid air, her fist clenched and unclenched trying to decide whether she would obey her Queen or not. Obedience won as she turned on her heel and stalked away. Xena fell down to one knee, her lip and nose bloodied by the Regent's beating. Gabrielle motioned to a member of the Guard to help the injured
warrior into the hut. Xena accepted help rising, but brushed off the Guard's assistance after that. She walked past Gabrielle, but never had the courage to raise her eyes from the ground. Gabrielle walked up and stood on the veranda, listening to the sounds of water as Xena poured some in a basin and wiped the blood away. The young Queen took a few deep breaths and realized that as with anything painful, this too, would be over soon. * * *
Xena stood in one corner of the room; her back against the wall and her arms folded around her torso. She fastened the laces of the shirt as high as she could to try and hide the marks of her disloyalty. Her hands still shook, but it was with fear. It was a new experience for the warrior and when she stopped to think about it, fear wasn't something she was even aware of until this small farm girl from Potidaea came into her life. Once the warrior fell in love with Gabrielle, fear became a very real entity. Xena feared for the young woman's safety, feared for her life, but most of all, she feared losing her love. Gabrielle walked into the room and stood there looking rather lost. Xena's heart broke as she realized that this time, she was the sole source of her bard's pain. Xena wanted to say something, but she wasn't sure what, if anything, would make a difference. She decided to be honest. "I don't--I don't know what to say, Brie." Gabrielle turned and looked at the warrior as if just noticing that she was in the room, too. She walked over and stood in front of the warrior; whose eyes couldn't even meet the pain filled emerald stare. Gabrielle reached up and tenderly touched the cut lip that trembled slightly. The Queen let her fingers follow the throat and stopped when she reached the collar of the shirt. Slowly Gabrielle's fingers began to unlace the leather ties.
The warrior never tried to stop her; she simply stood there and let Gabrielle untie the laces. Xena's lowered gaze could only watch, tears falling from her eyes to splash onto the Queen's fingers. When Gabrielle pulled the shirt open she squeezed her eyes shut momentarily. It had happened after all. There would be no explaining it away and Xena didn't even try to. The warrior reached for the small hand that still rested on her chest. "Don't..." Gabrielle pleaded, pulling from the warrior's grasp. "Don't touch me." Gabrielle turned away and walked to the open window. The sun finally rose over the treetops, but its light seemed like a harsh glare today. "Why, Xe?" Gabrielle asked in a shaking voice. "Oh, Brie, I don't know. I'm so sorry. I--I don't remember, I... I was drunk." Xena couldn't stop the tears now. She wanted so much to fall on the ground and beg for Gabrielle's forgiveness; to do something, anything to make this right again, but she knew that right now none of that would help. Maybe later, in a day or two when the pain wasn't so fresh for her bard. "Xena?" Gabrielle interrupted the warrior's mental ramblings. "Where is your amulet?" Xena's eyes met Gabrielle's and the warrior's hand slid up to her throat, her fixed gaze never breaking from the Queen's penetrating stare. She hadn't even noticed it missing, it had become such a part of her, always dangling just below the hollow of her throat. "My heart," Xena barely whispered. That's when the warrior knew. There would be no time to explain; no reconciliation. She had taken the token of Gabrielle's love for her and simply lost it. It didn't matter why or how, but the symbolism behind her action was clear. She had paid so little attention to its care that it slipped
from her grasp. The emblem of her heart and she had thrown it away. Xena's blue eyes continued to stare at her lover, even as they filled with more tears, to roll silently down her cheeks. Gabrielle's tears started then; just as silently streaking down her own face. "I want you to leave, Xena." Gabrielle said, watching the warrior wince inwardly as though struck by a blow. "I--I can stay with Ep... at least until--" "No. I want you to leave the village." The Queen said turning her back on the woman. "You're not welcome here anymore." Gabrielle finished in a heavy voice. It took a moment for Xena to realize what Gabrielle was saying. She had prayed against this coming true, but hadn't she known it would? If the positions were reversed, would Xena offer forgiveness? Didn't Gabrielle deserve the best, especially in a lover? Xena had known all along that she didn't deserve a love such as Gabrielle's and now, Gabrielle knew it too. The warrior had proved last night that she was far from the best. Gabrielle looked out the window, too afraid to turn around to see the shock on her lover's face. She knew that if she turned, she wouldn't have the strength to do what she must. Instead she looked out the window as she heard Xena slowly move around the room and collect her belongings. Once she had her saddlebags and weapons in hand, she moved up behind the young Queen. Xena still couldn't stop the tears that fell as she thought how small and vulnerable Gabrielle looked right now. "I know you don't want to hear this right now, but I do love you, Brie. I'd give anything if I could go back and undo this... anything. I never meant to hurt you. I didn't... I don't even remember what happened. I know that's a pathetic excuse, there can be no excuse." The warrior wiped her tears with the back of her hand.
"I never thought I'd be the cause of this kind of pain for you." Xena's voice was now so broken it was only a whisper. She moved closer to the young woman and saw her shoulders shaking with her own sobs. She wished she could at least hold the woman in her arms one more time. "Remember, you'll always be my heart... I love you, Brie." Xena wrapped a hand around Gabrielle's left arm and pulled her back to her. She pressed a kiss onto the top of the small blonde's head. Turning abruptly, she walked through the still open door. "I love you too, Xena." Gabrielle whispered around her tears as she watched through the open window as Xena strode to the stables. The warrior came out moments later leading the golden mare. She vaulted into the saddle and turned the horse's neck. She looked back at the young Queen, her small body framed within the hut's window. Bringing her fingertips up to her lips, she placed them over her heart and quickly spurred her mount away from the village.
PART III
"PLEASE, JUST LET me see her, just for a moment." Jordan's voice came from the other side of the door. "Let her in, Eph." Gabrielle's tired voice said. Jordan moved past the Amazon and quickly knelt in front of the chair Gabrielle sat in. The young Queen's face was swollen and her eyes were red. She offered up a weak smile to the Princess.
"I won't need that dress after all." She remarked, her eyes filling with fresh tears. "Gabrielle, tell me what's going on. Everyone has a different story. What in Tartaurus happened this morning?" "If you're going to sleep this late you're going to miss a few of our Amazon mini-dramas, you know." Gabrielle smiled at the young Princess through her tears. "Your Captain is the one to blame for all this." Ephiny stood protectively beside her Queen. "Adrian... and... Xena?" Jordan looked at Gabrielle in disbelief. The Princess watched as Gabrielle's face clouded over in pain at the words. "Gabrielle, I'm so sorry." "That bitch!" Jordan jumped up and headed for the door. "Where are you going? I won't have you dismiss her." Gabrielle called after her friend. "Dismiss her? I'm going to run her through!" Jordan shouted back. "Stop her!" Gabrielle cried out. Ephiny reached out and effortlessly grabbed the young Princess by the back of her neck. "Owww, hey." Jordan squirmed in the strong Amazon's grip. "Let me go." Ephiny pulled the young woman over to where Gabrielle now stood and released her. "Gabrielle, what she did--" Jordan began. "What she did, she didn't do alone. What do I do, Jordan? Punish every
woman in the land that my Consort decides to be unfaithful with?" "You talk like you still plan on marrying Xena?" Ephiny looked at the Queen in amazement. "That's a subject for later." Gabrielle looked at her Amazon friend and caught the distinct look of disapproval. "Adrian's only crime here was an ethical one. I have no right to take out my anger on her." The Queen explained to Jordan. "But, she's responsible for half the blame!" Jordan reasoned. "Jordan," Gabrielle said firmly. "Adrian isn't the one who I trusted." The young Princess finally gave in to the Queen's wishes. As Gabrielle turned to look out the window, Jordan thought she looked lost in thought. As Gabrielle's eyes filled with tears once again, the Princess could only surmise the Queen's contemplation was of a certain dark-haired warrior. * * *
Xena rode until Argo stumbled in the darkness. She removed the mare's saddle and left her free to graze. Without Gabrielle there didn't seem much point in starting a fire or hunting, for that matter. What good would food be to someone who had no stomach for it? Xena sat on the ground with her back against a tree. For perhaps the hundredth time that day, she put her face in her hands and wept. She eased her body onto the cold earth and wrapped her own arms around her body for comfort. She didn't even bother to lie out her bedroll. What would be the point? She knew she wouldn't sleep. She was too lost in selfrecrimination to relax. Each time she thought she had no more tears in her, they would again fill
her eyes and spill down her cheeks. Gods, how it hurts! The warrior hadn't felt this pain before. To love and lose, this was why people gave up, afraid to love again. The pain was too great. The warrior lay there like that until first light. When the grayness before dawn filtered down to earth, she pulled herself onto her horse and continued her journey. She had only one place to go where she knew she would be taken in. It was ironic that the only reason she had a family and a town to go back to was because of the small girl from Potidaea who followed her to Amphipolis one spring morning. The day's light began to wane just as the town came into view. Day or night would not have mattered to the woman on the golden mare. She never looked around, only staring straight ahead, unable to focus because of the tears. The view of the lush Greek countryside and rolling hills of her homeland could have been charred and in ruins, and still it would have been lost on the dark-haired warrior. The door to the inn opened quietly. The customers in the tavern paid no attention to the tall warrior who laid her saddle by the door, carrying her weapons and saddlebags in her hands. Toris was tending the bar. He helped out during busy times, leaving his farm in the capable hands of a hired man. "Xena?" Toris knit his brow together just like Xena always did. He couldn't believe his eyes, he barely recognized his sister. "Mom?" He called to the kitchen. Cyrene came through the doors immediately upon hearing her name. She instantly started to smile when she saw her tall daughter standing in the middle of the room, but stopped the motion with one look into her child's eyes. "Xena, what's happened? Where is Gabrielle?" Cyrene questioned with concern.
Xena looked down at the floor and when she raised her gaze back up, tears fell from her eyes. When she tried to talk her voice shook so badly she couldn't make sense. Cyrene put her arms around her daughter and drew her toward the back of the inn where their living quarters were. Looking back at the worried face of her son she called out. "Toris, heat some water for a bath in Xena's room." Toris left the tavern duties to one of the helpers and quickly ordered heated water. Moments later he knocked on the door to Xena's room before entering. Rolling in the large tub, he found his mother and sister seated on the bed. Cyrene had her arms around the dark-haired woman trying to soothe her weeping. Toris couldn't ever remember seeing Xena like this. Even as a young girl she had a tough as nails veneer. When the water was eventually ready, two young girls helped to carry it up and left it at the door. Toris brought it in himself and told his mother to call if they needed help. Cyrene finally calmed her daughter slightly and the older woman began to help Xena undress. Cyrene couldn't remember a time when Xena looked so ill. Her leather battle skirt was gone, replaced with a shirt and trousers. The warrior's clothes were dirty and her hair a wild, wind blown mane. Xena was pale and the blue of her irises seemed almost dull, deep set, dark circles lay underneath her eyes. Xena had stepped into the tub of steaming water, and only then did she remove the shirt that still clung to her broad shoulders. Cyrene gasped when she saw the marks on her daughter's body. "Xena, by the Gods. Who did this to you?" "It's not---I wasn't attacked." It was the only thing Xena could think of to say. The look on her mother's face said that she thought her daughter had been physically assaulted. Xena didn't know how to tell her mother what she'd done. How she'd taken the most precious thing in the world to her and carelessly tossed it away.
That's when her crying started again. She was very nearly dehydrated and had no more tears to shed, but her body shook with sobs so great that the water in the tub began to spill over the sides. By the time Cyrene had finally bathed her daughter and wrapped in warm blankets, lying her on the pallet in her childhood room, Xena was nearly catatonic. Her eyes glazed over; she no longer cried or spoke, she just curled herself into a tight ball and lay there. Cyrene got a mug of steaming tea and put twice as much of a sleeping draught in it as usual. Eventually the warrior slept, but her dreams were still haunted as her long frame twitched with spasms, in seeming pain. Cyrene went back downstairs into the Tavern to speak with her son. "Toris," Cyrene asked. "When you come back in the morning, bring a shirt and some trousers for Xena." "What happened to her... do you think Gabrielle is allright?" The darkhaired man asked with concern. "I'm not sure, son, but whatever happened, it was bad enough to put Xena in this state. I think we need to get a letter to the Amazons. That's where the girls were headed last. See if you can get Daxell to use some of those messenger pigeons he's always bragging about. I'm going to write a message now, I want you to go over there tonight." * * *
"Brie?" Xena asked sleepily. "No, honey, it's mom." Cyrene answered her daughter. Realization wandered into Xena face and her brow furrowed in pain. Looking up at the full moon shining through the open window, the warrior's
painful expression melted into one of confusion. "How long have I been sleeping?" Xena asked. "All last night and all day today, it's already late evening. I used some sleeping powder, it seemed like your body needed it." Cyrene commented, smoothing back the dark bangs that fell across her daughter's eyes. "Xena, I got a message from Gabrielle late tonight." Cyrene began. Xena looked up with an expression of alarm. "Is she allri--" "Nothing happened, dear, I contacted her. I was worried that perhaps something had happened to her to make you so despondent." "Did--did she tell you what happened?" Xena said, swallowing hard and lowering her eyes to the floor. "You can read the message if you like, but all she said was that the two of you had some problems that needed to be worked out." Xena sat up in the bed, raising her knee and resting her elbow there. Her head fell forward, held securely in the palm of her hand. "That's just like her isn't it... still trying to protect my image." Xena said softly. Finally the warrior turned to her mother and told the older woman the entire story. "Oh, Xena." Cyrene sat on the bed next to her daughter and wiped away her tears. "I know it seems like the end of the world for you now, but Gabrielle loves you. You still may be able to work all of this out, but you'll have to give her some time and the space she needs to cope right now. When the hurt isn't as fresh, she may see things differently. What you did though, my daughter, it may take a very long time for Gabrielle to trust you again." "I'll try to hold on to that, mom, but if you could have seen the look in her
eyes. I hurt her so much." "Yes, you did, there's no denying that fact. You have to own up to that, Xena." Cyrene responded. "But, I didn't even know what I was doing, I was drunk." Xena replied in a feeble tone. "But, nobody forced you to drink, did they?" Xena looked up at the loving and understanding expression of her mother. The woman, who gave Xena many of her ideas on honesty and integrity, wasn't pulling any punches. Xena thought back to the times she had a chance to reverse the events of that evening. If only she would have left the party with Gabrielle, if she would have listened to that small voice of reason, if she hadn't started drinking in the first place. "You're right. It is my fault." "Xena, I'm not telling you this to berate you, but if and when Gabrielle is ready to talk about this, I'm sure she'll appreciate a woman who accepts her responsibilities and not someone willing to simply place blame." Xena nodded. She thought about the reason that she started drinking in the first place. It was that damned headache, but her head seemed fine now. The warrior lay back down as her mother blew out the candles in the room. Xena finally fell into a fitful sleep, but at least she now held the hope that someday Gabrielle might forgive her. * * *
"This wasn't part of the deal!" The Goddess Artemis stormed through the lair of the Fates. The giant spinning wheel groaned and creaked as new threads were
added and existing lines were woven into, sometimes complex, patterns. Atropos sat poised with her shears, reading to complete the will of the Fates. "It is the way that the thread runs." The old crone said matter of factly. Artemis paced the floor. She was so close, why did the Fates have to intervene now of all times. "If this changes, then the structure of our agreement is changed." Artemis reasoned. The three women looked at one another and silently nodded their heads. "Then I want new rules. I want to be able to talk to each of them." Artemis said confidently. She was pushing it, but thought a little bravado might fool the old bats into thinking she had the upper hand. The three silently agreed once again. "But," Clotho began, "You may not reveal the outcome." "Done." Artemis agreed, now hoping that Xena and Gabrielle could hold on for just a little bit longer, endure just a little more pain. * * *
"Look, either you want something to drink, or not!" Xena slammed an impatient fist down on the bar. "Xena, dear," Cyrene called to her daughter. "Why don't you take a walk and get some fresh air?" Cyrene shushed the tall warrior out from behind the bar and pushed her outside. She loved the girl, but the mood her daughter was in was
beginning to drive the patrons away. Xena found herself in the stable with Argo. The horse had been brushed and scrubbed until her coat practically glowed. A streak of multicolored light alerted the warrior to the immortal presence before the figure actually materialized. A heartbeat later Artemis was in standing in the middle of the stable. "Oh, just what I need." Xena turned back to the horse. "Oh, look who has an attitude all of a sudden." "Hey, I actually prayed to you and all I got for my trouble was a bloody nose." Xena replied hotly. "You prayed once and expected me to pull you out of the fire? Hey, how did you get into that mess in the first place?" Artemis retorted. Xena couldn't hide the wounded expression that took over her features. "What do you want, Artemis?" The warrior asked between clenched teeth. "You need to get back to the Amazon village." She simply said. "In case you're not up on current events, I'd probably end up with an arrow through my heart. I'm not exactly well loved there right now." "Well, I don't care how you do it, but it has to be done. You have no idea what's at stake, warrior." "Is Gabrielle allright? Does this have to do with her?" Xena asked in alarm. "I can't say any more than I already have, Xena. In the next couple of days I'm going to provide a way for you to get back to the village. Swallow your damnable pride and make sure you take it." Artemis explained and then disappeared into a shimmer of light.
* * *
"Good morning my Queen." Artemis said softly to the young Queen. Gabrielle just made an offering to the Goddess in her temple, but didn't expect to see her benefactor in person. "Good Morning," Gabrielle answered, kneeling before the Goddess. Artemis smiled down on the young woman who looked like she hadn't slept in days. She assisted the Queen to her feet and marveled again at the demeanor in one so young. Frankly, she never thought Gabrielle would be strong enough for this setback. She was about to see what lengths she could push the girl. "Gabrielle, I understand that you're hurting right now, but there is a matter we haven't addressed yet." The young Queen looked up questioningly. "Xena has committed a breach of faith against the Amazon Nation. She must be arrested and brought back here for trial as swiftly as possible." The Goddess finished. "Arrested?" Gabrielle said in a very small voice. "There must be another way." "No, I'm afraid there isn't. You must send out riders today, immediately. Tell them to approach Xena unarmed. If the warrior sees that they will not harm her, then she will go willingly." Tears filled Gabrielle's eyes and the Goddess' own heart nearly broke at the small woman's pain. "Yes, Artemis," Gabrielle replied and walked out of the temple.
Gabrielle told Ephiny and Eponin of Artemis' orders to have Xena arrested. Ep, I know it's asking a lot, but I think if she sees your face, she might be less likely to hurt anyone." "Gabrielle, do you remember how well Xena likes to beat the Tartaurus out of me?" "I know, but it's that friendship I want her to see." Gabrielle proceeded to give them all the instruction that Artemis had given her. Then with a safe journey blessing, they were off. Eponin frowned as she thought of the young Queen's careful admonition that they arrest Xena unarmed. If Xena didn't want to come with, there wasn't much anyone, armed or not, would be able to do against her. If she had to go against her, she knew it would probably take Xena three blows to kill her. That would be enough to let her get in one really good hit before she died. After what Xena had done to Gabrielle, that one hit was going to feel mighty good. * * *
"Ep?" Xena inquired, looking at her Amazon friend standing in the middle of the tavern. The warrior looked around at the grim faces of the dozen Amazons with her and knew it wasn't going to be good news. "Xena of Amphipolis?" Eponin inquired formally. Once again Xena looked at the faces around her. Women she had fought and hunted with, all looking at her with contempt in their eyes. She realized it was deserved. Xena silently nodded her head at Eponin. "As an emissary of the Amazon Nation I have been ordered to place you
under arrest and bring you back to the Amazon village to await trial." "Thanks, Artemis." Xena muttered angrily under her breath. "By whose order?" Xena asked. "Her Royal Majesty Queen Gabrielle." Eponin answered. Xena realized her mother was right. Cyrene told her that Gabrielle's first reaction, after the initial pain had eased, would be anger. Looks like mom
is right again. "And, what are the charges?" Xena asked the Amazon. Eponin looked a little uncomfortable in this position of authority, and she lowered her head slightly as she answered. "Breach of faith." Xena closed her eyes briefly and nodded. "Allright, Ep," the warrior answered and held out both her hands. "That won't be necessary, Xena. I won't have to restrain you until we're on Amazon land." "Xena?" Cyrene watched as the whole episode took place and found it difficult to believe that Gabrielle could be this vindictive, but a woman scorned is always a sight to behold. "I'm coming with you, daughter." "No, mom, please. I'll send word as soon as I know what's going on." Xena turned and embraced her mother, softly kissing the top of her head. "Thanks, mom... for being there when I needed you." "Take care of yourself, I love you Xena." "I love you too, mom." Xena murmured and Cyrene thought that it had been a very long time since she'd heard her daughter say those words.
The older woman watched as her daughter was led out the door by the Amazon warriors. * * *
Gabrielle leaned back and stretched until she heard the small popping sound from her neck. She yawned and ran her fingers through her blonde hair. The warm summer air made her little pond a beautiful spot to hide out. She rose from her prone position on the rock ledge that overlooked the surface of the water and moved back to take a seat on a log under the shade of a large olive tree. Her fingers massaged her temples, trying to free her head of the pounding noise that invaded her skull. She had her staff with her, but Ephiny would be livid since Gabrielle had managed to elude her Royal Guard and get some much-needed personal time. The young Queen simply wanted to hide in bed and pull the covers over her head. Being the Queen, however, she wasn't afforded that luxury. She figured that she would just have to hold out and have her breakdown on her own time. Her heart ached with a pain so deep she wondered if it would ever stop. Will it ever get any easier? The young Queen wondered what was happening in Amphipolis right now and if Xena would agree to an Amazon trial. She had done everything Artemis asked of her, but the God's be damned, she would never allow Xena to be punished for her infidelity. It was true that her unfaithfulness broke Gabrielle's heart and left her with a hurt that nothing in life would be able to take away, but she would give up her throne before she would see her proud warrior humbled in that way. A small noise alerted her to the fact that she wasn't alone. She reached down to her feet and felt her fingers wrap around the smooth wood of her staff. She heard the faint metal jingle of a horse's bridle. Waiting until she knew where the sound was coming from, she jumped to her feet and swung the staff around her head and down. The stave stopped less than a
handswidth away from Adrian's chest. "Ares Balls, woman, you scared the Tartaurus out of me." Adrian said shakily. Gabrielle pulled up the staff and fixed a neutral gaze on the Captain. "Adrian." "Gabrielle." Adrian's horse wandered along the path, his bridle jingling as he shook his head back and forth. "Jordan told me that it's only because of you that I'm still alive right now. Is that true?" "I wouldn't put it quite that dramatically." Gabrielle answered. The Captain was waiting for the anger, the hate to come exploding forth. She had braced herself for the strike that was surely to come from the smaller woman's staff. Adrian watched as the small blonde sat back down on the log and looked out over the water. This wasn't the scenario she'd planned on. "What is it with you?" Adrian questioned, dropping her guard and her usual cocky demeanor. "Meaning?" "Meaning you should be trying to take my head off, at the very least ordering one of your Amazon's to do it!" "Is that what you want?" Gabrielle's soft, defeated voice struck at some part, deep inside the Captain. "At least it would be expected. I don't know how to handle this." She gestured at Gabrielle, indicating the young Queen's attitude. "I mean, a
fortnight ago you tried to break my ribs on the practice field. Now, after what I've done and all you can do is sit there." "First of all," Gabrielle began. Then a sharp stab of pain momentarily interrupted her thoughts. She shook her head trying to remember what she was saying. When the fog in her brain cleared, she continued. "First of all, you didn't do what you did by yourself. Secondly, when I fought with you on the practice field I was fighting for something that I thought still belonged to me. I've never met a warrior yet who felt the need to go on fighting after the war was lost." Gabrielle finished with sadness. "I guess I just didn't expect this kind of complacency." Adrian said quietly. Gabrielle stood and looked up at the taller woman as tears filled her gentle green eyes. Adrian was still able to see a glint of green fire smoldering there. "Complacency? Adrian, the only thing that has ever truly meant anything to me has been taken away. I simply don't have anything to fight for anymore." "What about the anger. Gods you must at least be angry with me." Adrian's voice rose an octave. Again that soft defeated smile. "It would take too much energy." Gabrielle began to walk away from the auburn-haired woman. Adrian roughly grabbed the bard by the shoulder and spun her around. "Hate, disrespect, loathing? You must feel at least a little." "Maybe I will... later. Right now I'm just too damn tired." Gabrielle responded evenly. Adrian wheeled angrily around and pulled her horses reins over the animal's head. Holding the leather strips securely in one hand she prepared to mount, but stopped abruptly. When she turned, Gabrielle was seated again, looking back over the expanse of the pond, tears streaming
down her face. "What is it in you that gives you the infinite capability to touch people this way?" Adrian said so low that it was a whisper. "Why is it when a warrior looks at you they suddenly develop a conscience?" Adrian fought against tears that hadn't fallen from her eyes in nearly ten seasons. The Captain watched the small woman for a few heartbeats like that. When she saw Gabrielle on that very first day, she thought of her as nothing more than a farm girl, playing at being an Amazon. Now, looking at the vision of a woman who felt like she had lost everything in life that had any meaning, Adrian was taken back. The small blonde had a dignity and a bearing that all the Queens in the world couldn't equal. Adrian turned to leave once more, but even she couldn't leave it like this. "I may be a bitch, but even I'm not that evil." Adrian muttered, reaching into her saddlebag and pulling out a small object. Crossing the grassy area to where the Queen sat, Adrian pressed the object into the smaller woman's hand. Gabrielle opened her hand to reveal Xena's amulet. "Gabrielle, Xena didn't lose it. I ripped it off her once the knockout drug I gave her took effect." Gabrielle looked up at the woman with disbelieving eyes. Then her gaze returned to the necklace in her hand. "After you left, the night of the party. I slipped Xena a sleeping draught, enough to knock over a bear. I took the necklace, stripped her, and put those love bites on her long after she was passed out. Trust me, she couldn't have fucked anyone to save her life. I do admit to her kissing me once, but that was only because she thought it was you." "Gabrielle, Xena never betrayed you... I did." "But... why?" It was the only thing Gabrielle could think of to say.
"Because I wanted Xena to know what it was like to have the woman you love, hate you. You don't though, do you? That's not in you. Hades, you don't even have it in you to hate me." Gabrielle stood and clenched the amulet in her fist. Another sharp stab of pain and now it felt like there were drums in her head. "I'm sorry, Gabrielle." The young Queen cried out as she fell to one knee. "Gabrielle!" "My head." She moaned. "Gabrielle, is it a pounding noise?" Adrian asked in a voice suddenly filled with fear. Gabrielle could only nod weakly; her eyes squeezed tightly shut. "Gabrielle, did you eat or drink anything that belonged to Xena in the last day or two?" Adrian received no answer as the young Queen fell unconscious in the Captain's arms. "I should just leave you here and ride away, you know that don't you? Aw, Hades, I'm gonna hang for this one, for sure!" Adrian said as she easily lifted the smaller woman into her arms and pulled the two of them onto her horse. * * *
"Xe?" Gabrielle murmured, trying to pull herself up.
"Easy, my Queen. It's Sartori." The healer answered. "I'm going to open the shutters a bit, I want you to open your eyes gradually." Gabrielle followed the healer's instructions until she was sitting up, the daylight streaming into the Queen's hut. She was groggy, but the pain in her head was completely gone. Sartori smiled and opened the door. A concerned Ephiny immediately went to Gabrielle's side. "She's been waiting quite a while to see you." "Gabrielle, don't you ever scare me like that again." The Regent gave her friend's hand a squeeze. "No problem. Now, how about telling me what exactly I did." The Queen responded, looking extremely confused. "The last thing I remember was talking to Adrian by the pond." "Don't worry, she's safe and sound in the jail." The Regent remarked. "The jail?" Gabrielle turned to look in each of their faces, trying to make some sense of the whole mess. "Someone better start at the beginning." The Regent looked at Sartori who seemed to know the most about what happened to their young Queen. She started the story where Gabrielle's memory ended. "Adrian brought you into the camp unconscious. She was very upset, but she kept saying the words poison and began ransacking your hut. It seemed like she was looking for something in particular. When she found an unfinished skin of wine, she gave it to me and said the poison was in the wineskin. I tried, but I just couldn't distinguish what kind of poison it was, being so diluted. I had no idea what to use as an antidote and your breathing was getting shallower and shallower. That's when Adrian went and gave herself up to Ephiny." Sartori paused to make sure Gabrielle still felt strong enough to go on and the Queen motioned for her to continue. "The Captain gave me a leather pouch filled with powder and said it was
the poison she had used on Xena and, inadvertently, you. Once I was able to determine that it was a substance called Rhadam, I knew exactly how to treat you." Gabrielle was still in a disbelieving state. "Poison? I don't understand that part. Why would she give Xena poison? She already admitted to me that the supposed night they spent together was a ruse." "A ruse? This is the first I'm hearing about that." Ephiny responded. Gabrielle held up her hand. "One story at a time." She indicated that Sartori should proceed. "Adrian has been slipping Xena this substance practically since her first day in our village. It's a combination of some very ancient plants. Rhadam attacks the brain, constricting the vessels that carry blood. Much like the pinch of the Warrior Princess. Given in correct amounts over a period of time, though, it causes agitation, unreasonable anger, and extreme headaches accompanied by a pounding in the ears. It's been known to drive men insane. Prolonged use is usually fatal." "Which does explain why you and Xena were arguing all the time." Ephiny added. "The only way to abate it from your system is to do exactly what I did in your case. Heavy sedation opens up the flow of blood to the brain. In the simplest term you have to sleep it off. You've been asleep for a full day." "Xena?" Gabrielle looked terrified. "Take it easy. I got a message this morning from Ep. Xena is with them and Eponin didn't say anything about her being ill in any way." The Regent quieted the young woman. "So how did I get it?" Gabrielle questioned. "One of the ways Adrian made sure Xena got a dose was in her wine. She
gave Xena two full skins of Ambracian wine as gift. Evidently you poured some in the last couple of days from that skin. Sartori said that since the dosage was calculated for Xena's height and weight, it sent you flying." Ephiny replied. "Now, how about this story of what went on between Adrian and Xena?" Gabrielle related what really happened the night of the party. Sartori reached into a pouch at her belt and produced Xena's amulet. "You wouldn't let go of it. I had to wait till you were sedated before I could pry it from your fingers." Sartori smiled. "So, Xena didn't, well..." Ephiny said "No, she didn't. Yet she still gave herself up. Xena was telling the truth, she really doesn't remember what happened." Gabrielle stated. "So, she immediately thought the worst about herself." Ephiny continued the thought. "And, we did too." Gabrielle said sadly. "I never even thought about another explanation, I was too willing to believe the obvious one. Eph, I'm going to need your help when Xena gets here." "Just tell me what to do, my friend." * * *
The heavy iron and wood door creaked as the Amazon guard opened it for her Queen. Gabrielle stepped into the jail cell. Adrian looked up from the pallet she sat on, her hands in chains attached to the wall. "Release those, please." Gabrielle commanded the guard, indicating the manacles.
"But, your majesty," the young Amazon began. Gabrielle arched one eyebrow and fixed her gaze on the guard. "Yes, my Queen," the Amazon muttered and quickly began releasing the chains. Adrian loved the glare Gabrielle was intimidating the young guard with. This small slip of a woman had the ability to conjure up a look that could have a grown warrior begging at her feet. "Thanks." Adrian said, rubbing her wrists and watching the guard leave the room. The young Queen had her staff with her and Adrian eyed it suspiciously. "Did you finally get angry? Is this the part where you beat the stuffing out of the prisoner with your stave?" Adrian managed a wry grin. "Don't tempt me." Gabrielle answered ominously. "But, you did save my life." "Let's not forget I'm the one that tried to take it, too." The Captain shot back. "You could have run. Then later in the village, you could have let me die." "No," Adrian shook her head slowly and her eyes softened as she looked up at the young Queen before her. "I couldn't do that, Gabrielle. Not to you." "Jordan said that she's giving you up to Amazon law to try you. There's only one problem with that. You're not an Amazon, nor do you have any ties to the Nation. I have no jurisdiction over you, Adrian. You're free to go." Adrian looked at the standing woman with disbelief, eyeing the open door. "You don't have to plan an escape, you really are free to go." Gabrielle said, watching the woman's face.
Adrian stood and tentatively walked to the open door. She stopped to look back at the Queen, who simply stood in a relaxed pose, gazing across the small room at her. The Captain turned her back, but as she moved once again toward the open door, she shook her head and paused. Placing her hands on her hips, she swiveled her head around to see Gabrielle watching her every move. "You know I won't go, don't you?" "I know no such thing." Gabrielle answered. "I do know, however, that Jordan says you were once a woman of honor." Adrian turned to face Gabrielle, shaking her head as in complete disbelief over her own actions "Gabrielle, I don't think even Xena knows what she has in you. What kind of punishment are we talking here?" "It would be up to the whole council to judge your guilt or innocence. For a crime such as this my best guess would be time in a labor camp or the lash." Gabrielle replied. Adrian took a deep breath. She weighed the options quickly in her head. Everything in her told her to run from this place and never look back. There was a very small voice that the Captain hadn't listened to in quite a long time, though. This tiny voice told her to stay and take what she had coming. The auburn-haired woman walked across the room and stood in front of Gabrielle. Deciding to listen to the tiny voice in her head, Adrian admitted defeat to the petite Queen with a heart unlike anyone she'd ever met. "I'll accept the Amazon judgment and any punishment that falls my way." Adrian stated. "I must be nuts, but I'll do it." She chuckled. Gabrielle smiled at the woman and applauded the courage of her decision. "Can I ask for one favor?" Adrian's voice caught. She wasn't used to asking for anything.
"If I have the power to grant it, yes." Gabrielle answered. "Will you give me your word that Xena won't kill me when she finds out the truth about what happened?" "I think you overestimate the kind of power I have over Xena, but you have my word that I'll do my best." "With you, Gabrielle, that's all that a warrior need ask for." Adrian offered up a wry grin. "You won't need the chains anymore and I'll leave the door to the cell open. I could put you under house arrest, but I think, for your own safety, you may want to stay in the jail." Gabrielle explained. "You mean if I stayed out in the village I could wake up in the morning with a dagger in my chest via some loyal Amazon?" Adrian quipped. "Something like that," Gabrielle said. Then the young Queen turned her back and was gone. * * *
"Xena," Eponin called the party to a halt, dismounting her own horse. We're approaching the edge of our land. I need to, uhm..." The Amazon indicated the wrist manacles in her hands. Xena arched an eyebrow that disappeared under ebony bangs. She looked at the iron restraints in her friend's hand and took a deep breath. This went against everything inside of her, but she wanted to prove to Gabrielle that she was willing to accept punishment for her behavior. "Front or back?" Xena questioned.
"Back." Eponin answered. Xena held her hands behind her and suddenly found herself taking in deep gulps of air, forcing tears down and remembering the last time she did this. It was a very different scenario when she and her bard made love by a lake in the countryside of Macedon. Eponin shackled the Warrior's wrists together and thought how differently this was going. Not how she planned it at all. Xena wasn't exactly being her usual Warrior Princess self. She did as she was directed and hadn't said a word during the whole trip; not that anyone would talk to her. She was amazed at the way the dark-haired woman silently endured the glares of the Amazon warriors around her. When they stopped to make camp last night, she watched as Xena sat apart from the others. At one point she awoke in the middle of the night to find the warrior seated on the ground, her back against a tree and the rays of the moon lighting up her face. Xena's eyes were raised to the dark sky and silent tears streaked her face. Her friend's pain touched her deeply and Eponin realized, for the first time during this whole mess, that there was never just one side to any story. Gabrielle's throne was set up on a dais much like the day that Jordan and her party rode into the village. Just as it was then, Gabrielle, her Regent, and the Royal Guard made an impressive sight in masks and their Amazon finest. Xena expected to see more of the village turn out to see the Warrior Princess brought back in chains. She was unaware that Gabrielle had personally explained and requested that her Amazons not be present at the display. She didn't want to humiliate Xena anymore than the warrior wanted to be in this position. Xena finally raised her eyes and felt an old familiar heat creep up her body. She suddenly became very uncomfortable in her saddle as the party drew nearer to the Queen's throne. Oh, yes... Gabrielle is very mad. The young Queen sat in the same outfit that she wore when on the night she officiated over her first Amazon ceremony. It also happened to be the
outfit she was wearing when her gentle seduction of the dark-haired warrior had finally come to its fruition. Barely enough to be called an outfit; the soft leather of the loincloth showed the Queen's body off to great advantage. Gabrielle's emerald eyes sparkled and from behind her mask, at this distance, she could watch every move her warrior made without being noticed. Her heart fluttered slightly when she saw the warrior's look of desire and the flush that slowly rose up her neck. The pain in Xena's eyes prompted Gabrielle to swallow hard. She caught herself from rushing forth and simply throwing her arms around her lover to ease the woman's distress. Gabrielle had to remind herself of who she was and why she was doing this. Artemis was still her patron and Goddess knows she didn't need another God mad at her. She already had her hands full with Ares' intense dislike of her. She, along with Ephiny's help would comply with Artemis' order to try Xena for Breach of Faith. "Xena of Amphipolis," Ephiny began. "You have been arrested and returned to the Amazon village to be tried for crimes committed against the Amazon Nation. The charge against you is Breach of Faith. How does the defendant plead?" Xena looked up at Gabrielle and noticed how her green eyes sparkled behind the Queen's mask. The warrior's brow knit together in confusion. Those were Gabrielle's smiling eyes, or the ones that peeked through when she was up to something truly mischievous. "Does the prisoner plead guilty?" Ephiny said slowly, enunciating the last word carefully. Now, Xena looked at Ephiny in confusion. The Regent was never supposed to lead a person into pleading one way or another like that. The warrior had planned on pleading guilty all along, but now she felt she had to, simply to see what all this was about. "Guilty?" Xena said, more a question than a statement.
Gabrielle raised a hand and motioned to a couple of the Royal Guard. "Detain the prisoner to await her judgment." "Judgment? Wait a minute, don't I get a trial?" Xena stammered, as two guards attempted to pull her away. Gabrielle leaned down from the dais. "Do you want one?"
What in Hades is this all about? Of course I want one! Xena then watched the way Gabrielle tilted her mask, as if she were smiling at her. The warrior cast a curious glance at all of the Amazons on the dais. They looked equally amused. Finally directing her gaze at Eponin, she was glad at least one other person looked as confused as she did. She had no idea what was causing the breach in protocol, but decided to go with it. "No?" She again hesitantly answered. Gabrielle simply waved her hand and Xena was escorted away. "What was that all about?" Eponin said between clenched teeth. Once Xena was out of sight Gabrielle pulled off her mask. "It's a long, but wonderful story, Ep. Let Ephiny fill you in. I have a warrior to pronounce sentence on." * * *
The two members of the Royal Guard stopped in front of the Queen's hut and began to climb the stairs up the veranda. "Why aren't we going to the jail?" Xena questioned. "We're full up there." One of the Guards answered. "Full up?" Xena returned as she was shoved inside the room.
Moments later Gabrielle came through the door and the breathing of three adult women stopped altogether for a full heartbeat. "Please, take those off," the Queen indicated the manacles. The Guard released the warrior from her restraints and she flexed her wrists to work out the stiffness. Gabrielle, in the meantime, walked across the room and bent down, placing her ceremonial mask in a chest by the bed. The view of the young Queen from that angle was breathtaking, but Xena realized there were others in the room who thought so too. "What do you think you're looking at?" The warrior growled at the two Guards. "Nothing." They said in unison, nearly tripping over their own feet in their haste to put some distance between themselves, and the now free warrior. Gabrielle stood, and with her back still toward her warrior, she smiled. There was something supremely satisfying in hearing that tone of possessiveness in Xena's voice. "You are dismissed." Gabrielle said, turning and watching the Guards move cautiously past the tall warrior. Gabrielle finally walked over and looked into her Warrior's face. She couldn't remember ever having seen Xena look so thin. Her usually tanned face was paler than it normally was. The dark circles under her eyes matched the ones on Gabrielle's face. Gabrielle I--" Xena started. Gabrielle's fingers extended forward and covered her lover's lips, interrupting the words. The Queen reached up and placed her lips over Xena's mouth and her own fingers. The warrior and Queen alike, both whimpered into the kiss. Xena was too stunned to even move. All she knew was that she didn't want
this incredible feeling to ever end. Her heart told her that her bard was willing to forgive her, but a small part of the warrior feared that the young Queen was toying with her emotions. Under normal circumstances Gabrielle wouldn't react that way, but Xena had pushed the young woman, perhaps to her limit. Gabrielle could see that her Warrior was trying to stay in control. The Queen had backed Xena against the wall; the warrior's palms braced flat against the smooth wooden surface. Xena's lips never stopped their participation in the kiss, however. Eventually, Gabrielle moved her kisses along the warrior's jaw and down her neck. "Gabrielle," Xena breathed heavily, I want you to know... that I'm willing... Oh, Gods... I'm willing to accept... whatever punishment you... want to hand down. I know I hurt you--" "I've given the matter ... careful... consideration..." Gabrielle punctuated each pause with a kiss or a nip of the smooth flesh of the warrior's neck. "My ruling is that I find you innocent of all charges." "Does that mean you forgive me, Brie?" Xena closed her eyes, waiting for the answer. "Oh, Xe... Xena?" Gabrielle waited for her warrior to open her eyes. "Please forgive me, my love." "Forgive you? For what?" Xena asked, her arms suddenly finding the will to move. They slipped easily around the Queen's body. "For doubting you. I should have believed in you. I told Artemis that I trusted you completely, but I should have trusted in you, even when you didn't trust yourself." Gabrielle pulled back and told Xena everything that she learned from Adrian, with the exception of the poison. When the Queen had finished her tale, she dangled Xena's amulet before the dark-haired woman. Gabrielle had the clasp fixed and it was once again the symbol of her heart for her
Warrior. As she moved to place it over the warrior's head, Xena pulled back slightly. "Things could have turned out differently that night. I should have listened to you. Are you sure, Brie?" "Xena, you're sorry and I forgive you. I'm sorry and you forgive me. Please, let's make this a part of our past so we don't have to worry about it ever again." Xena's blue eyes sparkled and she reached out to stroke the face of the woman she loved more than life. She lowered her head and Gabrielle placed the chain around her neck. "I love you, Xena... through everything, I never stopped loving you." "Oh, Brie... I can be so proud sometimes, but never, ever doubt my love for you." Xena replied as tears of a different kind filled her eyes. "Come and sit down, I need to tell you the rest." Gabrielle pulled Xena to sit on the furs and cushions in front of the empty fireplace. "The rest?" "Remember the headaches you were having... are you still having any?" "No, as a matter of fact, they stopped when I got home." Xena answered confusion evident on her face. Xena nodded once again when Gabrielle described the pain as a pounding in her ears. "How do you know that?" It was a poison. Sartori said it blocked the flow of blood to the brain, causing anger, headaches, and the noise. That's why you seemed so angry with me all the time. It wasn't you, Xe, it was the drug." "That evil bitch." Xena muttered and Gabrielle realized the warrior referred to Adrian. "What was this stuff?"
"Sartori called it, Rhadam. Have you ever heard of it?" "I've heard of it, but I haven't seen any for a good many seasons. That stuff is lethal. Enough of it and your brain will explode. How did you find out she did this, surely she wasn't stupid enough to come right out and confess to poisoning the Queen's Consort?" Xena gave a wry smile to the smaller woman in her arms. "Nooo," Gabrielle said slowly, drawing the word out as she tried to think of a way to explain. Just saying it all at once ought to work. "But, she did confess to poisoning the Queen." Gabrielle felt Xena's whole body tense at those words. "You?" Xena asked in a tightly controlled voice. "It was an accident, Xe. I drank from the Ambracian wineskins she gave you, the poison was in the wine." Gabrielle hurriedly explained. "You?" Was still the only word the warrior could verbalize. Suddenly Xena was on her feet and moving out of the hut. She remembered when the members of the Royal Guard said the jail was "full up". That's the first place she headed. Gabrielle was calling her name, but she didn't stop to listen. When the warrior burst through the main door, Adrian wondered what the commotion was about. When she saw Xena moving through the open door of her cell, she felt her mouth go dry and her knees grow weak. "Xena." Adrian raised her hands and backed up. Xena was across the room in two long strides and by the time Gabrielle got there, Adrian's feet were barely touching the ground, the Warrior Princess had her by the throat and was slowly squeezing the life out of her. "Xena!" Gabrielle shouted. "I gave her my word that you wouldn't hurt her."
"You're about to break that promise because I'm going to cut her heart out. Me, I can believe, but Gabrielle?" Xena hissed the last sentence. The warrior dropped the Captain to the floor and, by habit, reached over her right shoulder for a sword that wasn't there. Gabrielle thanked the Gods that Xena was unarmed. The look in her lover's eye told her that Adrian would have been dead had it been otherwise. The Queen took that momentary lapse when Xena realized her sword was not strapped to her back and positioned herself between the two warriors. "Gabrielle..." Xena drawled in that slow warning tone. "Xe, I gave her my word. She agreed to accept Amazon law and whatever punishment we hand down. We've already found her guilty and the council meets this afternoon for sentencing. Xena glared past Gabrielle at Adrian for a few heartbeats, but to the Captain it seemed an eternity. "Whatever they sentence you with... it won't be enough." Xena hissed. "Xe... come on, please, love lets go." Gabrielle said softly as she pulled Xena away from the Captain. The Queen and her warrior left the jail, arm in arm. * * *
Adrian sat in front of a long wooden table. As Queen, Gabrielle sat in the middle of the council, but in this case did not get a vote since she was the victim of the crime. Three of her Amazon sisters sat to each side of her. Ephiny, as Regent, read the charges aloud then asked the prisoner to come forward and stand for sentencing. "Adrian of Chalcis, after having been found guilty of crimes against the
Amazon Nation your sentence has been agreed upon. Three moons or thirty lashes, the sentence will start tomorrow morning. The choice is yours. The first choice will be three moons in the labor camp in Olynthus. Your second choice is to accept thirty lashes of the whip. At the conclusion of either your debt will be considered paid. How do you choose?" Ephiny asked. Adrian swallowed hard. Labor camps weren't prisons, but they generally weren't much better. Thirty lashes with the whip was a lot. The punishment would be over faster, but to wear the scars of the whip, especially for a warrior, that was a hard thing. "I'll take the lash, but on one condition. I'm invoking my Right of the Accused." Adrian said to the murmurs of the crowd of onlookers. "You're not an Amazon," Ephiny sneered, "you can't invoke that right." "On the contrary, my Regent," Elda, a council member on Gabrielle's left spoke up. The Captain has given herself over to Amazon law and has agreed to accept Amazon punishment, so for that reason she does indeed have the rights of an Amazon in this case." Gabrielle knew what the Right of the Accused was from her readings in the scrolls. The young Queen wondered how on earth Adrian found out about the clause. She sat there praying that the Captain wasn't going to ask for what she thought she might. Ephiny sighed deeply and looked at Gabrielle before continuing. "By invoking the Right of the Accused you may request that your punishment be handed out by the Amazon of your choosing. The punishment that has been agreed on is thirty lashes with the whip. Who do you request mete out the punishment. Every ear that heard the ruling knew what the prisoner was about to say; only some of them were only half right about why.
"Queen Gabrielle." The prisoner answered. * * *
Gabrielle stood in front of the open window in the Queen's hut, the light of the waning moon spreading brightly across her skin. Xena sat on the cushions by the fire and watched her silent lover as Gabrielle contemplated what tomorrow would bring. The warrior sighed and thanked Artemis for her part in bringing her back here. She didn't know how long she would have lasted without Gabrielle's love. Xena watched as the moon filtered through the strands of the bard's hair, her eyes traveled across the young woman's body and as always, wondered what Gabrielle saw in her. Xena rose and walked up behind the young Queen. "You're thinking too much." The warrior stated. "This isn't the first time you've had to sentence someone like this. It's the first time that I've had to carry out the punishment." Gabrielle said in a shaky voice. Xena moved her hands to the young woman's shoulders and could feel the tension in the way the flesh bunched and tightened. She began to massage the stress from the Queen's muscles, finally placing a kiss on her bard's neck and drawing her close. "Gabrielle, you are a Queen, the Ruler and final authority of this Nation. There are times when being a ruler means making and carrying out unpleasant tasks, and hard decisions. As a Ruler, it's up to you to show your people that you would never ask them to do something that you yourself are not willing to do. It's not very fun to be in charge, is it?" Xena said the last with a smile and a kiss to the young Queen's cheek. "But, what will you think of me?" Gabrielle asked.
"What? Brie, what do you mean?" "Seeing me use the whip on someone. It's a cruel punishment and I don't like it. I--" Gabrielle couldn't finish because her tears overtook her. "Oh, Brie," Xena turned the woman around and held her tightly in her arms. "Someone has committed a crime and it's the duty of whoever is in charge to carry out the punishment for that crime. I wouldn't expect you to shirk your duty for anyone, my heart, especially for me." Xena tenderly kissed the small woman she held in her arms. Gods, how I missed this. The warrior ran her kisses along her lover's jaw, just underneath her ear. "Gabrielle, I love you and not because you're a Queen or an Amazon, or a bard, or because you have a smile that can make my knees go weak, or even because you have the most beautiful green eyes the Gods ever bestowed to any mortal woman. I love you, my heart, because of who and what you are... deep in here." Xena said as she pressed the palm of her hand over the bard's heart. "I would never ask you to be less than you are," she kissed along the edge of the young Queen's ear and felt the shiver of the smaller woman's body that accompanied that act. "Just as you have never asked it of me." She whispered. The pair slept little that night and it wasn't because of frustration or anger. They talked and held one another as the embers of the fire turned into small glowing coals. For that night, alone and away from the eyes of the world, they weren't an Amazon Queen and the Warrior Princess. They simply became two women in love. * * *
Xena watched as Gabrielle stood by impassively as Adrian was stripped from the waist up and placed between two poles, each as thick as a large tree, set into the ground. Each of the Captain's wrists, were tied with a length of rope to a metal ring set into the pole. Xena had given her young lover all the tips and techniques, any subtle nuances she could think of regarding the use of the whip. Gabrielle was technically proficient with her own whip, which was a six-foot length of braided leather, as opposed to the eight-foot bullwhip that Xena favored. The warrior taught Gabrielle everything from how far away to stand to how to clean the leather after. Xena kept herself at a distance from the young Queen, knowing this was the time that Gabrielle needed to be inside herself. The small blonde wore her customary Amazon leathers and had her hair pulled back into a loose braid down her back. She walked over to where Adrian was restrained and retied the ropes to give the Captain more slack in her arms. Xena smiled to herself as she watched. Her bard had listened well. If there was no slack, the tighter your back muscles would be and the more it would not only hurt, but cut as well. Adrian's head turned and she noted the expression on the young Queen's face. Trepidation tinged with a bit of fear. "Gabrielle, have you ever done this before?" Adrian asked, trying to swallow but finding out her mouth had gone dry. "I find this an most peculiar time to ask that question." Gabrielle responded. "Just remember that nothing ever hurts as bad as you think it will. Have you ever felt the whip?" "Once in a brothel in Corinth, but I guess that's not the same thing, huh?" The Captain said with a grin full of bravado. Gabrielle shook her head at the woman and tried to hide the beginnings of a smile. "No, not exactly." The Queen's face turned serious and she placed an arm on Adrian's shoulder.
"I'll make it as quick as I possibly can." Gabrielle said in a low voice and positioned herself behind the restrained prisoner. Gabrielle extended her right arm and let the coils of the leather whip stretch out to their full length. She whipped the braided leather into the air to untangle its length, then ran her hand along it's span. Xena told her the softer the leather, the less of a bite and her whip had been oiled and softened to perfection. The first strike was the hardest on Gabrielle, yet the easiest on the prisoner. By the time a dozen passes had been completed, Adrian's small whimpers turned into groans and Gabrielle was soaked in sweat. On number fifteen, the Queen switched hands and worked the opposite side of the prisoner's back. Xena also taught her to start out with her dominant hand, that way by the time you switched and the prisoner was in continual pain, your lesser hand would strike with a lighter touch. By number twenty, the welts began to split open and each strike of the leather began to cut deeper into the flesh. By number twenty-five, Gabrielle had tears in her own eyes as Adrian lost her footing and hung from her wrists. Gabrielle refused to stop and in moments the punishment was complete. If any Amazon that witnessed the punishment on that day, ever thought Adrian chose Gabrielle to wield the whip because she thought the sensitive Queen would show leniency, they quickly learned that was not the case. Ephiny stood in front of the near unconscious woman and read the official declaration. It ended simply with; "Your debt has been paid." Gabrielle turned and walked a few feet, dropping her whip into a bucket of water that one of the guards provided. The young Queen watched for a few heartbeats as her leather whip tinged the water a crimson color, then she continued walking, entering her own hut. Xena already stood inside their hut and, opening her arms, she beckoned the Queen into her embrace. The warrior had assisted two young girls in
filling the Queen's bath inside the hut and now Xena tenderly undressed her lover and helped her into the steaming water. Gabrielle hadn't said a word, but her tears continued to run down her face. The warrior gently washed her lover, helping her from the tub and wrapping her in a warm blanket. She laid down on the furs and cushions and wrapped strong arms around the still crying woman, rocking her gently. "I d-don't f-feel much like a Queen right n-now." Gabrielle sobbed against her lover's shoulder. "But, you are, my heart," Xena responded. "More than even you know." * * *
Gabrielle stood on the veranda of the Queen's hut, anxiously peering down the well-worn path that led out of the village. A strong pair of hands slipped around her waist while soft lips caressed her neck. "Mmmm." Gabrielle moaned, closing her eyes at the feel and the scent of her lover. Leaning back even further into the embrace, she encountered the sensation of cold metal against her back. Turning in her lover's arms, she found herself looking at a familiar sight. Xena stood in her customary battle skirt; her scrolled armor breastplate set firmly in place. "Hey, you look good." Gabrielle smiled. "But, this is what you've seen me wear everyday for the past five seasons." Xena replied, grinning down at her lover. She knew how Gabrielle felt about her revealing leather attire. The warrior had never really thought of her body as beautiful. It served its purpose and that was always enough, but then there was the way her bard looked at her sometimes Every once in a while she would catch the young woman in a
definite daydream state, the bard's eyes running the length of the warrior's legs. She'd been wearing trousers and a tunic long enough. Besides Gabrielle's definite affinity for the leather garb, Xena was anxious to feel like her old self again. Her lover would soon have the chance to see her in her trousers again for their wedding. Xena recalled yesterday afternoon as she stood semi-patiently for another fitting. When they first showed her the design, she balked at the colors. They had her wearing her traditional black and purple, from her days as Conqueror. The warrior categorically refused, instead choosing the light blue color of the Queen's Champion. Gabrielle kissed the skin of Xena's chest just above her armor effectively bringing the warrior out of her own thoughts. "Mmmm, you taste good, too." Gabrielle teased with a seductive smile. "I take it that you're feeling better today?" Xena asked. Gabrielle nodded her head. She spent the remainder of the day of Adrian's punishment in her own hut wrapped around the warrior. She slept later than usual yesterday and then spent the afternoon with the Captain in the healer's hut. Ephiny took on the task of dealing with some of the ceremony preparations, so Gabrielle wouldn't feel so overwhelmed. She was finally feeling a little more like her old self again. Once her mother and Lila got here, they could see to some of the smaller details of the ceremony. "You know they won't be here for another candlemark or so." Xena said. The warrior watched the young Queen's face with amusement. "How come you always know what I'm thinking?" Gabrielle asked. Xena chuckled. "Because that's what a good wife does. Besides, my heart, you have a look on your face like a child on Solstice Eve. That can only mean that you're looking forward to something and I'd say that something, is seeing our families again."
"We could ride out to meet them." Gabrielle offered. "You?" Xena asked with disbelief, "You want to ride somewhere?" Xena teased the small woman in her arms. Gods, this feels so good! "Well, riding behind you in the saddle does give me an excuse to put my arms around you." Gabrielle quipped right back at the dark-haired warrior.
Gods, this feels so good! "Ahh, the truth comes out," Xena responded. "Well, now what if I wanted you to ride in front of me so I could hold you in my arms?" Gabrielle took a heartbeat to think about it as she smiled mischievously up at the warrior. "Hhmmm, well, a good wife would never say no to her warrior." The young Queen said, smiling at the double entendre. * * *
Xena and the Queen met their families halfway to the village. The warrior ended up getting her way and the pair made a striking impression as always on the large golden mare. Gabrielle sat in front of the warrior; Xena held Argo's reins in one hand, her other wrapped loosely around her bard's waist. The two women thoroughly enjoyed the ride, both proclaiming it much too short. Xena spent most of the trip nuzzling the soft skin of the young Queen's neck. When they caught up with the two wagons that carried their family members, Toris was just splitting off to go stay in the Centaur village until the ceremony, which was still four days off. One wagon carried Cyrene and a huge amount of food that she promised the village cooks she would shop for on her way there. The other wagon carried Gabrielle's mother and her younger sister.
The young Queen's father was suspiciously absent, but that didn't come as a great surprise to Gabrielle. Xena, on the other hand, was hoping Herodotus would have a change of heart and want to see his oldest daughter married. She had hoped he would bury the hatchet and want to be a part of the event. Instead his absence was a glaring reminder to the young Queen of all she didn't know about her parents. Hecuba's mysterious message, the last time they met, hadn't been far from Gabrielle's thoughts as her wedding day drew closer. Hugs and kisses went around and Gabrielle couldn't believe that Xena not only allowed the contact from Hecuba and Lila, but the tall woman seemed to be enjoying the whole thing. Toris swept Gabrielle into his arms as he always did, ignoring his sister's mock glare. "This is your last chance, Gabrielle. Leave this no good warrior and become a farmer's wife." He quipped. "Oh, Toris, as tempting as that does sound," Gabrielle said with a look that said being a farmer's wife was the last thing on earth she wanted to be, "I think I'll stick with what I've got." "Always the diplomatic Queen." Toris laughed and released the young woman. After they had stopped to visit for nearly a half a candlemark, Toris grabbed his mount's reins to head off to the Centaur camp. "Toris," Gabrielle called. "I wonder if I could walk with you for a few minutes?" "Sure, Gabrielle." The dark-haired man answered. Xena directed a questioning look at her lover. Gabrielle drew close to the warrior and kissed her on the cheek. "I'll catch up, love. There's something I just thought of asking Toris. I'll fill you in later, 'kay?" Gabrielle's emerald green eyes with the tiny flecks of pure
gold sparkled in the sunlight and the warrior was powerless to refuse her anything. Xena lost the power of speech for a quick moment and could only nod at the beautiful young Queen. Shaking her head once Gabrielle turned and walked away with her brother, Xena told the women and the Amazons accompanying them that they would walk for a bit until Gabrielle caught up with them. Xena barely had to nod her head in Gabrielle's direction and three Amazons quickly jumped up into the trees to follow the Queen. * * *
"Gabrielle," Toris slowly drawled her name and the young Queen thought how much like her lover the timbre of his voice was. Of course, her Warrior had the ability to turn her bones into warm liquid with that drawl. "Don't look up, but I think someone is in the tree watching us," Toris' hand went to the hilt of his sword. Gabrielle's lilting laughter filled the air around them. Her arm slipped through the tall young man's and her hand stayed his sword. "It's okay, they're just watching me. I'm sure about half a heartbeat after you and I walked away, your sister sent a few guards to keep tabs. Being Queen doesn't afford a lot of private time. The only time they allow me out of their sight is when I'm with Xena." "You two really know each other well, don't you?" Toris asked in amazement. "Some days better than others." Gabrielle tossed back, still smiling. "Toris, I wanted to ask you for a favor." She continued. "It's obvious Herodotus won't be here for our Joining and I'm much too petrified to walk down the steps of the temple by myself. I know that your
love and acceptance of Xena and I means a great deal to her. Actually, it means a lot to me too. I wonder if I could talk you into escorting me down the temple steps?" Gabrielle was almost afraid the dark-haired man would turn her down. Toris stopped walking and let go his horses halter to take both of Gabrielle's small hands within his own. "Gabrielle, seeing you and Xena together, watching the love you two share. Well, in a way it's almost like a balm to my own heart. I wandered around for so long with such pain inside me that didn't think I could ever stop hurting. Then I met up with you two, remember?" Gabrielle smiled and nodded her head, remembering the man whom Xena introduced with so much contempt that fall day. "Knowing that you and my sister can have something so special like this, it gives my own heart hope that it will happen for me too, someday. I'd be honored to escort you, Gabrielle." * * *
"You don't mind then?" Gabrielle asked Xena as the two women walked back to their own hut. "Of course not, I'm actually kind of glad Toris will be standing there. Moral support." She winked at the small blonde. "Oh?" Gabrielle chuckled. "You make this sound like you're getting married at sword point, my Warrior." Gabrielle replied. "Weelll," Xena drew the word out as she climbed the steps of the veranda. Gabrielle playfully swatted the retreating backside of the dark-haired woman in front of her. Xena turned quickly and wrapped a strong arm
around the Queen, pinning the smaller woman's arms, and then the warrior began to tickle her lover, Gabrielle unable to stop giggling. A commotion at the entrance to the village drew their attention away from one another. Three Amazon warrior's rode up with a man screaming at the top of his lungs that his wife was being held by vicious Amazon killers against her will. "Oh no," the two lovers said in unison. The man tied between Eponin and a younger warrior named Tarazon was Gabrielle's father, Herodotus. Villagers came to see what the commotion was, along with Hecuba, Lila, and Cyrene. In the meantime, Eponin had to practically drag the man close to the veranda so they could speak to Gabrielle. "There she is. There's the harlot that's keeping my wife away from me!" The man spat. Gabrielle didn't know if he meant her or Xena, but she wasn't of a mind to put up with the man's foolishness. This time they were in her home. Gabrielle pulled away from her lover slightly and Xena watched the young Queen, wondering what she would do. "I'm sorry your majesty," Eponin addressed Gabrielle as she pulled a knife and sliced through the cords that held the man's wrists together. "But, he was extremely belligerent and struck one of the younger warriors." Gabrielle raised an eyebrow at the news. It was peculiar that at this very moment she felt very little for the man standing on the ground below her. Growing up, Gabrielle had tried in every way she knew how to gain the love and acceptance of the man that acted like she wasn't even in the room half the time. After his behavior the last time they met, even more so now, she truly believed that this man with such a bitter heart could not be her father. She took a deep breath and stepped to the railing of the veranda. "You are welcome to attend my Joining ceremony, of course, Herodotus,
but I must ask you to be respectful, not only to myself, but to my subjects." The man's name sounded foreign, coming from Gabrielle's lips that way. He sneered as he looked up at the young Queen with contempt. "Respect... Why? You're no Queen. Didn't you tell them that you're just a poor farm girl?" He scoffed. Xena came up to the porch railing beside her lover and lightly placed a hand on the Queen's shoulder. The warmth seemed to infuse Gabrielle with a renewed strength and she continued, just as calmly as before. "I don't ask you to treat me as anything special. Just give me the respect that every human being deserves." Gabrielle said. "Human?" The older man's voice went up an octave and her looked over to where his wife stood. "You never even told her!" He shouted in Hecuba's direction. Hecuba made her way to stand in front of the angry man. "Herodotus, please, just go home. Don't ruin this time for Gabrielle." The older woman pleaded. Herodotus looked as if he were going to explode at the thought of his wife siding against him. Even though his next move was still a flicker in his eye, Xena caught it. Gabrielle turned in surprise as her Warrior vaulted her body over the porch rail to land directly behind the man. As her feet hit the ground, his arm was in mid air to strike the older woman in front of him. Xena caught the man's wrist in a grip that tore a howl from his throat. "You draw this back again and I'll see to it you leave with a stump." Xena whispered in a low ominous voice that was so quiet only he and Hecuba could hear it. Gabrielle couldn't make out what the warrior said, but she watched as the man's face took on a white pallor and he licked his lips, trying hard to swallow. Gabrielle's mind was still a few sentences back where Herodotus
practically accused her of not being human. The Queen walked down the stairs and planted herself firmly in front of the man. Green fire flashed from her eyes and suddenly she looked very much like an Amazon Queen. "Herodotus, you will be escorted off Amazon land, and if I ever so much as hear a rumor that you ever raised your hand against my mother, my sister, or any one of my people... so help me, I'll come after you myself." Gabrielle nodded to Eponin who took great satisfaction in carrying out her Queen's orders. "Thanks." Gabrielle smiled up at her Consort. Turning to Hecuba, the young Queen's eyes took on a look of anger and concern. "Mother... we need to talk." Gabrielle said as she led the older woman up the stairs to her hut. * * *
"I'm so sorry, Gabrielle, I didn't think he'd follow us." Hecuba sat in front of the young Queen, the older woman wringing her hands nervously. "Mother," Gabrielle stopped and took a deep breath. She didn't want her voice to carry that Queen's tone, not with her mother. "Mother," she began again in a softer manner. "I need to know the truth. No cryptic messages this time, no semantics or word games. I just want to know who my father is." Hecuba sat with her head bowed, listening to her daughter's entreaty. She sat that way until Gabrielle felt that the older woman was refusing her request. "Mother, all this time you've kept this secret, but don't you know that I've
always felt that something was out of place, that something wasn't right about me? For nearly all the seasons of my life I felt like there was something wrong with me, that it was my fault. I refuse to believe that anymore, mother. I refuse to believe that I'm the different one. Please, please tell me the truth." Gabrielle pleaded tearfully. "Oh, Gabrielle," Hecuba said, tears in her own eyes. The older woman cupped her daughter's face gently. "There has never been anything wrong with you... don't you know how gifted you are? If you thought you were different, it was only because those around you paled in comparison." "And, Herodotus?" Gabrielle questioned. "No, my daughter... Herodotus was never your father. I thought... he promised he would be good to you... It's my fault that you felt so unloved as a child." Hecuba's tears fell freely now. "Oh, mother," Gabrielle moved beside the woman and put her arms around the weeping woman. "I'm glad I finally know, please, don't cry." Hecuba let herself be comforted by her oldest child, fearing to tell the rest of the story. She should have known Gabrielle would not let it go. "So, if it isn't Herodotus... who is it?" The young Queen tentatively asked. "Gabrielle, do you truly want to know? Wait--" Hecuba motioned for her daughter to let her continue. "--Even if it is someone you would rather not know about?" Gabrielle thought about that statement. Could it possibly be someone that she would be better off not knowing about? What would she do then? But, could the truth ever hurt her more than the childhood she'd already experienced? The young Queen only knew one thing, and that was if she had Xena by her side, she would be able to face anything. "Yes, mother. I truly want to know who my father is." Gabrielle replied calmly.
"Then the first thing we'll need to do is go to the temple of Artemis." Hecuba rose and Gabrielle did likewise, following her mother from the hut. Xena sat on the steps of the porch, knowing Gabrielle would want some privacy with her mother. She was surprised when the two came out of the hut after so short a time. She was just getting prepared to find something to occupy her time. "I want Xena to come too." Gabrielle said and Hecuba nodded her head. Gabrielle explained to her Warrior what little she knew as she walked along the familiar path to the temple, her mother a few strides in front of them. Once in front of the altar that was made of polished wood so smooth it fairly glowed, Gabrielle and Xena took a step back as Hecuba knelt and prepared an offering. The two lovers watched in confusion as the older woman pulled a light chain from around her neck. She weighed it momentarily in the palm of her hand, then slipped a ring off of the chain. She placed the golden ring onto the wooden altar. The familiar form of the Goddess Artemis materialized at once next to where Hecuba knelt. The tall woman bent and with gentle hands assisted Hecuba to her feet. "So, you've come at last, my friend." Artemis spoke to Gabrielle's mother. "It's time." Hecuba responded. The warrior and the young Queen exchanged a look of surprise, if not awe, at the look of friendship that existed between the Goddess and Gabrielle's mother. It was either the transparency of their thoughts or the look on their faces, but Hecuba and Artemis turned around at the same time and laughed at the two of them. It was a rather solemn and frightening occasion for her young daughter, but Hecuba couldn't resist trying to make the moment a little lighter.
"And, you thought your mother never got around." She said coyly. Gabrielle's nervous smile prompted Xena to place an arm around her shoulder, trying to give her lover a focal point from which to draw strength. "Gabrielle, is it true, that you want to know who your real father is... no matter what the consequences might be?" Artemis asked her young Queen. Gabrielle looked at the warrior next to her, then placed a worried gaze at her mother and Artemis. "You guys make it sound like it's somebody horrible." She responded with the same worried look. "No, Gabrielle," Artemis chuckled and Xena could feel some of the tension leave the smaller woman's body. "It's simply that there are circumstances," Artemis couldn't help but look at Xena when she said this, "that may inhibit your acceptance of your father." "I've waited so long," Gabrielle said, "to know why I am the way I am. I am afraid... afraid my life will change somehow, but I'd like to know, even if it hurts the truth has to be better than nor knowing." "Ah, always the truth with you, Gabrielle." Artemis replied. Then she turned to Hecuba. "She does have a lot of her father in her." "Yes," Hecuba agreed. "The very best parts." Artemis bent to the altar and picked up the ring that Hecuba placed there. She crossed to where Gabrielle and Xena stood and the warrior relinquished her hold on the small blonde. Lifting her hand, the Goddess slipped the thin circle of gold onto the ring finger of Gabrielle's right hand. "Gabrielle, as long as you have this ring all you ever have to do to request your father's presence is speak his name." Artemis said and took a step back.
Gabrielle fingered the thin gold band and looked into the faces of each woman there. She watched the ring as she twirled it around her finger. Looking up she spoke the words, "Father..." It was slow; perhaps that was his natural shyness showing through. A form finally materialized to stand beside Artemis. Xena watched Gabrielle, knowing she wouldn't recognize the God, after all Xena had only seen him once herself. The warrior took in the light sandy hair, the compassionate green eyes, and as he smiled his nose seemed to crinkle in exactly the same way as Gabrielle's, and Xena knew this to be the truth. Why she had never stopped to think about it before was beyond her. It made so much sense, didn't it? Gabrielle, the young woman who was filled with the very light of goodness itself, whose talent as a bard was unequaled, and who believed in moderation in everything, these were exactly the virtues the daughter of Apollo would manifest. Apollo was a quiet God; content to play his lyre and captain the chariot that brought the sun into the mortal realm's sky every day. He was a poet who was gifted in healing and prophecy and from him all of Greece came to say, Pan Metron Ariston, which means "everything in moderation." This would always explain Artemis' seemingly personal interest in her young Queen's well being. Being Apollo's twin sister, she was Gabrielle's aunt.
Yes, Xena thought to herself, there is definitely truth in this. No one said a word as the God and the young Queen gazed at one another. Finally Xena moved to stand behind Gabrielle, placing both her hands on the small blonde's shoulders. "Brie... this is Apollo... your father." Xena whispered to her lover. Apollo took a step forward and raised a hesitant hand in Gabrielle's direction. Immediately the small blonde shifted away until her back was pressed tight against Xena's armor.
"It's okay, I'm right here, my heart... I won't let anything happen that you don't want to." "I can't do this!" Gabrielle said, then the warrior watched in surprise as the young woman ran from the altar room. "Uhm, let me go talk to her." Xena said, following her lover out the door. Xena found her lover in the anteroom to the temple, sitting amongst stacks of scrolls and empty baskets. She was crying, but making a valiant effort to hold it back in. "Brie, honey, are you okay?" Xena said, kneeling down in front of the young Queen. "I thought it would be... I don't know, maybe one of the other men from her village... I just didn't think... It's okay, Xe, you don't have to marry me, I understand how you feel about them and with me you'd be marrying in to it and--" "Whoa, whoa, whoa." Xena said placing her fingers on Gabrielle's lips to quiet her. "You're making me dizzy, baby. Now, try and relax," Xena said wiping the tears from the woman's cheeks. "First of all, my heart, there are plenty of worse guys in the world that could be your father. I mean as Gods go Apollo's a pretty decent one. Hey, how'd you like to have my rumors... that Ares is your father, hmmm?" Xena moved to sit by her lover, pulling the young woman into her lap and wrapping strong arms around the small blonde. She realized that her bard had suffered through a great deal lately, more than any woman her age should have had to. Today was just one more weight, added to the young woman's shoulders. "Brie, if you think this or any other thing in this world, in any world for that fact, could make me give up taking you as my wife, you are sadly mistaken. Hey, I've worked too hard to get you to say yes," Xena said lifting the woman's chin until their eyes met, "I'm not going to let you slip away
now." Gabrielle looked into the deep pools of blue and felt the power of speech leave her. Never in all her life would she know why this strong warrior, who could have any lover in the known world, would choose her. She wrapped her arms tightly around Xena's neck and kissed her. "Thanks, Xe... I needed to hear that." "Do you feel like going back in there, just for a little longer?" Xena asked. Gabrielle nodded her head and swallowed the nervous lump in her throat as she took her Warrior's hand and walked into the altar room again. * * *
Gabrielle and Apollo walked through the temple garden as Xena watched from the temple window. "Would you like to sit here?" Apollo indicated the rocks around a small pool of water. Gabrielle nodded. "I love the sound of water, it's so... I don't know, relaxing, I guess." Apollo waved his hand and small rivers of water began to cascade down the rocks and into the pool where they sat. "Wow, I'd like to be able to do that." Gabrielle remarked. "You probably could, you know, with a little instruction." The God responded. "No thanks." Gabrielle chuckled. It was amazing how comfortable she felt with this God, completely unlike most of the other inhabitants of Mount
Olympus she'd met. "You should have seen how many times I hit myself in the head trying to learn how to use my staff. I can't even imagine the damage I could do learning something like that. I'd probably start flash floods all over the countryside." Gabrielle finished, still laughing at herself. Apollo leaned his head back and a round of genuine laughter came from deep in his chest. "Gabrielle, your wit has always been a constant source of pleasure for me." Gabrielle smiled, then looked rather surprised. "Do you... do you watch me?" Apollo's eyes turned a soft, sea-green color and his voice mellowed just slightly. "Gabrielle, there isn't a day that goes by when you're not in my thoughts and I can only let so much time go by before I have to take a look and see what you're up to." "You haven't seen anything... embarrassing?" Gabrielle quickly thought to the times she and Xena, well, best not even think those thoughts, or... "Are you humming?" Gabrielle couldn't figure out where the sound was coming from. "Uh, yes, I am." Apollo uncharacteristically stammered. He quickly explained to Gabrielle's questioning look. "If I hum or sing, I can't read your thoughts." He finished and Gabrielle smiled because she thought she saw him blush. "So, you've watched me?" The young Queen wasn't sure how she felt about that. "Sometimes... Sometimes I would have liked to knock you in the head, then sometimes I wanted to be able to give you a hug, and then there were times when I wished I could have told you that any father would be proud to have a daughter like you, Gabrielle." The young woman suddenly felt herself choke on a sob as she tried to hold
the rush of emotions back. Tears filled her eyes and Apollo moved quickly to put his arms around the small woman. Surprisingly, Gabrielle gave herself up to the embrace and allowed the God to hold her. "I'm sorry, it's... well, I've wanted all my life for my father to say those words to me." She paused. "Gabrielle," he whispered, kissing her temple, "he just did." The two stayed like that for quite some time. Xena, satisfied that her bard was in safe hands, finally turned away from the window to allow the father and daughter their time together.
PART IV
GABRIELLE AND XENA walked behind Hecuba toward the Amazon village. The older woman appeared lost in her own memories, but a smile played on her face and she felt better than she had in many seasons. She told her daughter to give her a little more time and she would tell her the whole story of how she met Artemis and Apollo. "I think it went pretty well, after my initial bout of insanity, what do you think?" Gabrielle joked with her Warrior and Xena was glad to see that light in her bard's smile. I think I'm going to have to keep a closer eye on you than ever. Now with all these godly powers, who knows how many women will be throwing themselves at your feet." Xena teased. "Hah! I don't think I have any godly powers."
"I don't know you're pretty good at reading other people's thoughts." Xena responded. "Here," she stopped her lover and wrapped her arms tightly around her, placing a slow, lingering kiss on the smaller woman's lips. "What am I thinking right now?" The dark-haired woman asked, raising an eyebrow in an unmistakable expression of seduction. "Shame on you, Warrior... besides, you only have four days left to wait until our wedding night." Gabrielle reprimanded. "See, you've got those powers already." Xena said as she resumed walking. "Oh, right, like it takes a God to know what you're thinking about half the time." Xena stopped and turned to look down at her lover with a small grin. "Are you saying I have a one track mind?" "I'm saying," Gabrielle punctuated her words by poking her index finger into the warrior's chest. "That you, my Warrior, are absolutely insatiable!" Xena arched an eyebrow and grabbed Gabrielle's hand. Without looking at the woman by her side she muttered out of the side of her mouth, "Seems like that's the pot calling the kettle black." Suddenly the warrior felt a small stab of pain behind her right temple. She stopped and looked down at Gabrielle, who returned her gaze with a worried one of her own. * * *
"There has to be another way. We could make a deal... something?" Artemis pleaded to the uncaring women before her. "There are no deals to make... it is the way of the thread." Atropos
responded, her counterparts nodding in agreement. The old crone lifted her shears to the mighty bunches of threads that wove themselves in and out of one another with seeming random. She looked for the one that would guide her. It was so white it practically glowed. For quite some time, this had been the thread that she used to hold her place. It stood out in stark contrast to the threads that sometimes wove themselves to it. Some were practically black, but once their pattern pulled them away from the white thread, their colors changed. Lightening to, sometimes, brilliant pastel hues. Running alongside the white thread ran a lavender thread. It wasn't always this pale color. Once it was a dark purple, so dark it was almost black. Then it began to run alongside the white thread, in places they wove together so tightly, they looked as one, and this was one of those times. Atropos slipped the large shears into the exact spot in the thread, careful not to cut the white thread, but they were so close, the old crone knew it would be almost impossible to cut one without it affecting the other. Lachesis looked on, her thoughts being interpreted easily by her counterparts. She was hesitant in her duty this time and expressed a certain sadness to the other two. "We owe this one a debt that we haven't fully repaid," She mused. "But, the thread beckons," Atropos said... * * *
"Xe, are you okay?" Gabrielle asked.
Xena saw her lover's lips moving, but she couldn't quite make out what she was saying. It sounded like her bard was under water. The hand that held Gabrielle's was still held snugly in the Queen's grasp, but Xena couldn't feel it. Worry and then pain filled her features. That's when she felt a sharp pain that took her breath away. "Brie?" The warrior gasped weakly.
Atropos clenched her hand muscles and the shears came together, their razor sharp blades slicing cleaning through the lavender thread. The thread fluttered loosely to the floor, its anchor unwinding and hanging limply across the bright white thread. Xena realized the ground was coming up at her, as her knee protectors hit the ground with a sharp thud, all the warrior's weight behind the fall.
"Wait!" Lachesis' hand was quicker than lightning, plucking the thread that fluttered lightly from mid air before it ever touched the ground. The warrior never heard Gabrielle shouting, nor felt the small woman as she caught the warrior before her head hit the ground.
"It is done." Atropos said * * *
Gabrielle was nearly hysterical by the time the Amazons carried Xena's unresponsive body to the healer's hut. Sartori pushed everyone out of the way, leaving Gabrielle alone in the room. The young Queen finally grew quiet as she watched the Healer, but Sartori could hear the sobs being choked back into the young woman's throat. Sartori's first determination was that the warrior suffered from no sickness,
anything contagious that could be spread to the Queen. She took a sharp instrument made of bone and pierced the warrior's skin, even ran it along the inside of her thigh sharply, there was no response. Sartori lifted Xena's left eyelid and watched the pupil contract, as it should when she brought the light of the flame closer. The Healer lifted the right eyelid and was shocked by what she saw. The warrior's pupil filled her entire eye. It remained fixed and unmoving when Sartori repeatedly moved the flame closer, then farther away. Sartori took a deep breath and turned to meet the young Queen's eyes. "Gabrielle," Sartori said the Queen's name softly. It sounded odd between the two of them; the Healer never called Gabrielle by her first name before. "Perhaps... we should send for the warrior's mother... and her brother." Gabrielle looked at the healer in disbelief, searching the woman's eyes for some shred of hope. Then she looked down at the still body of her lover who had just moment ago wrapped her arms around her and kissed her. "No," Gabrielle shook her head slowly back and forth. She placed her hand on Xena's chest. "Her heart is still beating!" Gabrielle cried. Sartori had no way to explain in a way that Gabrielle would understand. "She's a strong woman with a strong heart, it may beat for sometime time yet, but I fear your Consort is gone, my Queen." "No!" Gabrielle cried, pushing the Healer back away from the pallet. The Queen's cries brought Ephiny into the hut and Sartori explained in a low whisper. Tears immediately sprang to the Regent's eyes as she went to stand beside Gabrielle. The young Queen moved behind the warrior, pulling Xena to lie in her lap. The sounds she made as she cried went straight up to heaven and the sound echoed loudly throughout the hall of the Fates. The sound was enough to touch the heart of the Goddess Artemis and she fled from the hall, to seek her own sanctuary. By the time Cyrene was brought into the room, word had passed through
the village of the Warrior's fall. Cyrene walked into the room that was silent but for the sound of Gabrielle's weeping. The older woman's hand covered her mouth as she saw the still body of her daughter and the young bard who refused to loosen her grasp. The others left the room as Cyrene knelt beside the two women, her own tears joining with Gabrielle's. Candlemarks went by and soon Toris rode up, having been told of his sister's accident. He found his mother silent on the steps of the Queen's hut and inside he watched as a few Amazons he recognized, tried to get Gabrielle to relinquish her hold on her lover. Toris returned to the steps and sat beside his mother, placing a comforting arm around the older woman's shoulder. Inside they could still her the young Queen crying in torment. "Gabrielle," Ephiny said to her Queen after half the day had gone. "We should prepare--" "No, don't touch her!" Gabrielle cried, slapping the gentle hand that Ephiny had placed on Xena's arm. "She's not going anywhere... she wouldn't leave me! Don't you dare leave me, Xena!" The young Queen practically screamed the words and, to Ephiny, the scene was hauntingly familiar. The Regent remembered an afternoon in Thessaly, in a bombed out shell of a temple, where she watched Xena scream, cry, and plead just as Gabrielle was doing. For the warrior, her prayers were heard, but for Gabrielle, it seemed no miracle would be coming as Xena's body remained still and unmoving. Gabrielle rocked Her Warrior, thinking it impossible that Xena could be gone. Xena would fight; she would fight to get back to her bard. The Warrior would beg, borrow, and steal from every God she knew to get back. Gabrielle pressed her lips to Xena's. They still felt warm to the touch. She placed her hand over her Warrior's chest and felt the beating of the woman's heart. A sob full of heartache broke free from the young Queen's chest as she realized that her Warrior's heartbeat was much fainter than it had been. She wrapped her arms even tighter around her lover and never
heard the door open when Ephiny and Eponin walked into the room. Gabrielle's loud sobs had subsided to constant tears, which fell from her eyes and splashed onto the Warrior's armor. The young Queen watched as the firelight danced across the ring that Artemis gave her just this afternoon. The small blonde touched the ring and never hesitated. "Father." She whispered. The two Amazons nearly fell backwards in their chairs as the figure of a man materialized in the center of the room. Apollo knelt beside his daughter and listened to the sound of her tortured cries. He, along with the other Gods on Olympus, had already heard of the Warrior's outcome with the Fates. "Please... please, help her." Gabrielle pleaded through her tears. "Gabrielle, it's the whim of the Fates. Artemis has already fought for Xena, but they have refused to change the Warrior's fate." "Please..." His daughter's tears broke Apollo's heart just as they would have torn at any other father's soul. "I'll do what I can." The God said and stood, bending down once to place a gentle kiss on his daughter's forehead. After that, he was gone. The two Amazon's who sat in the corner looked at one another and slowly rose to go outside. After that, Gabrielle ordered everyone out unless the family wished to come in. Hecuba tried to get her daughter to rest for a while, but the young Queen seemed not to hear as she held and rocked Xena in her arms. "Please, don't leave me, Xe. I won't be able to go on without you. You always call me, your heart, but don't you know that you're mine too? If your heart stops beating, then my life ends too. I won't go on for one day without you, my love. I'll fall on a sword if I have to just to follow you. I'm sorry, love, but I have to be with you."
Gabrielle whispered to her Warrior. Then the young Queen began talking of all they'd done and all they had yet to do. * * *
Apollo, usually the mildest natured of all the Gods on Olympus, entered the hall of the Fates with the sounds of his daughter's weeping still ringing in his ears. "We haven't been graced with your presence in a long while," Clotho observed as the three women went about their tasks. "I'm here about my daughter." Apollo said firmly. "You have a daughter?" Clotho asked. "Yes, he does indeed and I think I know why you're here." Lachesis answered for the God. Lachesis indicated the loose thread that still lay in her lap, her thoughts transferring to her counterparts easily. "The Warrior's thread has fallen, the will of the Fates is final." Atropos ruled. "And, Gabrielle? What will become of my daughter because of this?" Apollo stepped toward the women and the ever-turning spindle the threads ran on. "Her thread runs on, that is the will of the Fates." The old crone answered. "And if she chooses to alter your plans?" Apollo questioned.
"She cannot... it is the Fates wish that she go on." "Evidently you haven't had much contact with my daughter. Her will is very strong, and her heart even stronger. As a matter of fact, isn't that her thread there?" Apollo pointed out the bright white thread and all three of the Fates turned to look at once. Even as they watched, the brightness of the thread dimmed and grew dull. It slowly began to fade to gray, and then something happened that surprised even the Fates. Suddenly the threads near the Fading thread began to darken, and then the ones that wove themselves tightly to the once bright thread began to darken. The Fates were beside themselves. No one had ever displayed such power over other threads before. "How do we undo what we have already decreed?" Atropos inquired. "I have an idea," Lachesis said. She quickly picked up the loose thread that had been cut earlier and began weaving it within the fading thread. She tightened and straightened until the lavender thread and the fading thread looked as one. The three Fates held their breath as they waited to see the outcome of their handiwork. Apollo smiled at the result, even though he had very little to do with it. Of course, there was a half-mortal Amazon Queen who would never believe that she could have had the strength of heart to change the will of the Fates. * * *
Gabrielle continued to hold her Warrior, feeling Xena's heartbeat grow
weaker. Finally, with a sorrow greater than at any time in her life, she moved from behind the Warrior and gently laid her dark-haired lover down on the pallet. The young Queen began removing her Consort's armor, talking to her as if she could her the small blonde's voice. "I don't know what I'll do without you telling me to get up in the morning, or not having you around to tell me to feed my stomach monster. I'm going to miss you so much, Xe..." Gabrielle placed the pieces of armor on the chair by the bed, until the Warrior was left in her leather shift. Gabrielle sniffed and wiped her still falling tears away. "I probably won't be able to sleep at night without hearing you snoring next to me." "I don't snore..." The low alto of Xena's voice penetrated the Queen's musing. Gabrielle turned to the sound of her lover's voice to see Xena's blue eyes flutter open and a loud yawn escape her. Gabrielle sobbed as she looked at her lover, not sure whether it was a vision or not. "Brie... honey, what's wrong?" Xena asked in alarm, seeing Gabrielle's face. "Are you real?" Was all Gabrielle could think to say. "Am I--of course, I am... baby, what's wrong, did I pass out or something?" Xena was getting a little worried about her bard. "Oh, Xe!" Gabrielle threw herself into her Warrior's arms, sobbing. Eponin thought she heard voices inside the hut. She walked quietly in the door and found Gabrielle sprawled across Xena's body. Suddenly the Amazon saw Xena's hands move along Gabrielle's back. Eponin backed out through the open door so fast that when her hips hit the porch railing, the astounded Amazon's body flipped right off the porch. Sartori among others quickly moved to help the warrior who still lay on her back in the dirt.
As a matter of fact if the scenario hadn't been so frightening, she would have laughed. It seemed that no matter what; Eponin ended up flying off the Queen's porch in some manner. Everyone was circled around the fallen warrior when Eponin raised her arm and stammered nonsensically, pointing up to the entrance of the Queen's hut. Ephiny grabbed the warrior. "Ep, what's wrong... what did you see?" The Regent asked. "Zuh--Zuh--Xena!" Eponin pointed her arm wildly. "Yea?" Xena stood in the doorway, her arm around Gabrielle's shoulder, and both the Queen's arms around the dark-haired woman's waist. Xena appeared as if she needed to lean upon Gabrielle, but the Warrior looked very much alive. "Oh, Xena," Cyrene ran to her daughter and the taller woman hugged her tightly. "I'm okay, mom... really." Xena whispered, receiving the same tight embrace from her brother. Xena was still a little unsteady on her feet, but she never appeared it, as she pulled Gabrielle close to her and rested her chin on top of the small blonde's head. "Gee," she whispered to her lover, "you'd think they never saw anyone die and come back to life before. It happens to us all the time" * * *
Gabrielle didn't have to push very hard to get the Warrior into bed. Xena admitted that she felt like she'd waged war all day. The young Queen smiled realizing her Warrior didn't yet know how very close to the truth that
statement was. Finally, the last person left to see her was Sartori. She examined the woman and shook her head in amazement. "It is truly a gift from the gods, Xena. I can't explain it any other way." The Healer remarked. "I'll take free gifts where I can get 'em," Xena grinned, then yawned deeply. "Sleep is the best thing right now. Gabrielle, don't hesitate to send for me if there's any change." Sartori said before leaving. Xena snuggled into the extra pillow Gabrielle had provided and sighed pleasantly as she watched her lover move about the room. Suddenly Xena's senses picked up a familiar tingling feeling. "Brie?" Xena barely had time to say, before Apollo's figure materialized in the middle of the room. Gabrielle took one look at her father and threw herself into the man's arms. Xena couldn't help but smile broadly at the sight. Gabrielle was such an openly affectionate person that she surprised people sometimes. Apollo had a look on his face that reminded Xena of what her face must surely have looked like the first time the small blonde embraced her that way. For a full heartbeat the handsome God looked terrified, then confused, but as soon as he registered the fact that this was his beloved daughter, he wrapped his arms tightly around the young woman and returned the affection. "Thank you," Gabrielle said, pulling away and wiping the tears from her eyes. Xena sat up slightly and commented on the sight. "I take it that you either missed each other or, Apollo, you had something to do with my sudden restoration."
"Actually, Xena I had very little to do with bringing you back. To tell the truth, the reason the Fates changed their minds was mostly because of Gabrielle." "That doesn't surprise me in the least." The Warrior said, glancing at her lover with a crystal blue gaze. * * *
Xena settled into her lover's arms, Gabrielle stoking her hair, her face, the young Queen's eyes never leaving the dark-haired woman in her embrace. The Warrior could barely keep her eyes open and her lovers touch had her floating on a cloud. Xena noticed that Gabrielle fought against closing her eyes, keeping watch over the Warrior. "Brie," Xena said sleepily, "you can go to sleep, my heart... I'm not going anywhere." Gabrielle smiled against the ebony wisps of hair that fell against her face.
She knows me so well. "Xe?" Gabrielle asked softly. "Hhmmm?" The Warrior answered. "What do you think I could have done that would have made the Fates change their mind?" It was Xena's turned to smile. She tenderly kissed her lover's neck, nuzzling the warm skin. "I'm sure you were just being you." Xena said before sleep claimed her. * * *
The three Fates continued to watch the thread closely. Hours had passed in the mortal realm, but to these three, barely the flicker of an eye had gone by. The thread they watched so intently had already begun to lose its dull color and glowed softly. The lavender thread twisted and looped around the white and Lachesis ran her fingers over the filaments she so recently wove, nodding to the other two. She tugged experimentally and already found them bound together as one. While they watched, the strands of the lavender thread spread around and through the white, until both cords changed into the palest, most beautiful hue of blue-green. * * *
"Are you still asleep?" Gabrielle asked, a little surprised that her warrior was still snoring away at midday. "No... It's a new form of meditation I'm working on." Xena responded grumpily. Waking up a bit more, the warrior apologized. "Sorry, Brie. I feel like a cranky five-year-old, though. I hate being this tired." "Should I be worried?" Gabrielle asked, but Xena could tell by the sound of her voice that the young Queen was already worried. "No, your father said it was to be expected." Xena yawned, surprising even herself at how easily that phrase slid off her tongue.
Speaking of which, I had to have a talk with Ep and Ephiny this morning. They were in the room when my father, boy, that's gonna take a little getting used to saying. Anyway, when he showed up the first time last night, they were here with me. I asked them not to tell everyone in the whole country, but I had to explain it to them." "Xe... Xe, are you listening to me?" Xena's only response was a gentle snore that told the Queen her warrior was definitely not listening. She smoothed the hair back from the unknowing face and kissed her lover's cheek. * * *
Xena stretched and yawned contentedly. Rolling over, she ran right into a pair of emerald eyes staring her way. "Hey," the warrior said in a sleepy voice. "Hey, yourself, sleepy. Hungry? I brought over a tray in case you woke up." "Absolutely famished!" The warrior responded enthusiastically. Xena pulled on her robe and sat down at the table with Gabrielle, but not before placing a kiss on the top of the small blonde's head. "Did you eat already?" Xena asked as she devoured more food than was her custom. "Uh huh." Gabrielle nodded, stealing a ripe fig from the tray anyway. "Should I get more?" She asked with surprise. "I can't understand it, but I guess this coming back to life takes a lot of your body's energy." Xena replied with a sheepish grin.
"You've missed a lot of guests arriving today." Gabrielle said. "Oh, yea that breaks my heart. Who are they, some Kings come to see if you're really off the market?" Xena teased. "No." Gabrielle slapped her warrior's arm. "Let's see Hercules and Iolaus came by first thing this morning. Some of my Amazons were having a hard time controlling themselves, so they're staying in the Centaur village." Gabrielle laughed. "Oh, and the messengers finally tracked down Autolycus, everyone's favorite thief should be here tomorrow." "Better tell the temple guards to nail down everything they don't want to disappear." Xena deadpanned. "Salmoneus wandered into the village. He said he was, being such a close personal friend to the Warrior Princess and all, sure that his invitation to the wedding must have been delayed. I took off once he started talking about selling Xena and Gabrielle dolls. Can you even believe such a thing? I mean, who in their right mind would buy a doll of us? He seems to think there's this huge market for it." "Hah!" Xena laughed. "I can see his sales pitch right now... Xena swords, Gabrielle staffs, imitation chakrams! Doesn't he realize that people would never spend good dinars on junk like that?" Xena let out a loud yawn. "I feel like I'm doing a lot of that, sorry, Brie." "Well, I guess I'd rather have you doing that now, than on our wedding night." The young Queen teased. Xena took the young woman's hand and pulled her into the warrior's lap. "Oh, I don't thing there's any chance of that, my heart." Xena replied, kissing her lover tenderly. "You know, everyone is coming back tonight for a little get together. Do you think you might be up for it?" Gabrielle asked hopefully.
"Oh, Brie, I don't see how I could stay awake. I'm ready to go to sleep again right now." Xena noticed the crestfallen expression on her lover's face and stroked her face gently. "Why don't you go? After all you've been through lately you could certainly use a night out." "Oh, it's not that big a deal." Gabrielle answered quickly. "Brie," Xena said softly. "You remember you did the same thing last time?" Both women understood the incident the warrior spoke of. When Xena died and Gabrielle brought her back to life with a taste of Ambrosia, the bard was anxious for weeks. It took the young Queen quite a while before she could allow the warrior out of her sight without experiencing feelings of dread. Gabrielle hovered over and watched Xena no matter what she did or where she went. Xena saw the same fear in her lover's eyes as she did back then. "Brie... honey, with the exception of being very hungry and very sleepy, I'm okay now. You don't have to keep watch, allright?" Xena pointed out. Slow tears fell from the young Queen's eyes and Xena wrapped her arms tightly around the smaller woman, the warrior's own heart aching at the pain her bard endured because of her. The dark-haired woman forced down the fatigue she felt and held her lover until Gabrielle had purged her mind and heart of the past day's pain. "Hey, why don't you get cleaned up and go meet our friends this evening, allright? Make my apologies and promise me you'll let loose and have a really good time, okay?" Gabrielle smiled, wiped her eyes, and nodded her head at her lover. As Xena watched Gabrielle walk off to the bathing pools, she made sure there were at least two Royal Guards not far behind the young Queen. Finally, the warrior fell back onto the bed and was instantly asleep.
* * *
"Ep, how many mugs of wine have you poured for Gabrielle so far?" Ephiny whispered out of the side of her mouth. Eponin sat closest to Gabrielle for most of the night and Ephiny began to notice that the Young Queen's words were beginning to slur together a bit. She also noticed that Gabrielle's mug never got more than half empty before Eponin jumped up to refill it. "I don't know, guess I lost count. For being such a tiny thing, she sure can put it away with the best of 'em though, huh?" The Amazon grinned. "Ep, do you have a death wish, or what?" Ephiny replied. "Do you know what will happen if Xena finds out you got Gabrielle drunk?" "Hey, Xena's the one that told me to do it." The warrior looked slightly wounded. "Xena... the Warrior Princess? She told you to get her bride to be drunk? Were those her exact words, Ep?" "Weelll, she said to make sure Gabrielle let go and had a really good time tonight." Eponin thought hard, trying to remember what the dark-haired warrior had actually said. "I have a feeling," Ephiny began watching as the newly arrived Autolycus and Gabrielle were drunkenly exchanging dirty limericks, "that Xena didn't mean this good of a time. Just keep an eye on her." Three candlemarks and many wineskins later, the partygoers had dwindled down to Ephiny, Eponin, Autolycus, Hercules, Iolaus, Princess Jordan, and Solari. With the proper encouragement, Gabrielle had been telling perhaps more about a certain warrior than said warrior would have cared, had she
been present. "Well, I probably shouldn't even say this, but..." Gabrielle started. Seven people leaned forward at the same time. "Do you know what Xena really likes? You guys don't really want ta hear about this, do ya?" "Yes!" Seven voices answered at once. Hard as it was for any of them to admit, but there was something, deep inside that wanted to know what this small, sometimes delicate, woman could possibly do, that would keep the Warrior Princess entertained when the candles were blown out at night. It was a question that no one would ever come out and ask, but here Gabrielle was offering the information. It didn't seem to matter at this point that the young Queen was absolutely soused. "Well, when I--" "Gabrielle?" The familiar low drawl of Xena's voice broke through the night and everyone at the table looked up into a piercing blue gaze that did not look amused. The warrior stood with her arms folded across her chest, her eyes focused on the small blonde at the other end of the table. Xena wore only her leather shift, but she still made an impressive figure and the rest of the guests suddenly remembered to whom the young Queen belonged. "Xena, nice to see you feeling allright." Hercules said, while those around him nodded profusely. "Well, I'm beat, how 'bout you?" He hit Iolaus on the back. "Oh, yeah... long day." His companion nervously agreed. Autolycus stretched his arms and let out a deep yawn. "Wow, is it that late? Well... g'night." Xena never moved and her gaze never wavered as the guests all rushed to put as much distance between themselves and the warrior as possible.
Gabrielle continued to look into her mug, feeling the weight of Xena's stare on her. "Gabrielle?" Xena's questioning voice was low and ominous. "You told me to have a good time." Gabrielle said meekly, looking up with what she hoped was a contrite expression. Xena just glared, and then just as suddenly realized she could no longer keep up the pretense of anger at her lover. The previous look she wore was mostly for the benefit of the other revelers. It would never do for all of them to know that Gabrielle had the warrior completely wrapped around her little finger. Xena gave her lover a little lopsided grin. "I guess I was the one that told you to enjoy yourself, wasn't I? I guess I didn't realize you'd enjoy yourself into the middle of the night." "Sorry, Xe." Gabrielle attempted to stand and promptly found herself on her backside beside her chair, a thoroughly confused look on her face. "Hey," Xena said, moving quickly to her young lover. "You okay?" "Me? Sure, nothing to this. I've been walking nearly all my life." Gabrielle replied. "You need some help standing?" Xena asked with a knowing smile. "You mean I'm not?" The Queen looked as if she was in another world. "Right!" Xena said, scooping the slight woman up in her arms, moving toward their hut. "Brie, stop that." Xena was having a hard time walking and holding her cherished cargo while her lover kissed her neck that way. Gabrielle's kisses turned passionate as she tugged at the skin on the warrior's neck with her lips and teeth. Xena breathed deeply, controlling
her emotions, and kept walking. When her lover started to knead her breast through the leather shift, Xena began to lose her cool. She could feel her own skin responding to her lover's touch and soon found that she had stopped moving. "Gabrielle..." Xena's low warning tone rang out. "I want to taste you." Gabrielle purred. "Oh, Brie... Gods, give me strength!" Xena responded, lifting the young woman and tossing her over her shoulder. "Hey," Gabrielle protested, the warrior continued to walk. "Gabrielle, stop that!" Xena said sharply, looking around to see who might be watching. From the young Queen's position, slung over the warrior's shoulder like a sack of dried fruit, she couldn't resist slipping her hand within the petals of the warrior's battle skirt and fondling the tall woman's shapely backside. Xena pulled the small woman into her arms again, trying to hold off what seemed like a dozen pairs of hands at once. "Where are we going?" Gabrielle murmured against the warrior's neck. "Where we can have privacy," Xena responded. "Brie... I just want you to know I'm doing this because I love you." Xena replied in exasperation, stopping at the edge of a sandy bank. The warrior pried her lover's hands from around her neck and unceremoniously tossed the woman into the cold water of the lake. Xena waded out to her knees and when Gabrielle's head surfaced, the warrior grabbed the neck of the tunic she had on. "Hold your breath," she warned Gabrielle. The young Queen wasn't so far gone she couldn't see what was coming.
She obediently held her breath as Xena dunked her head into the cold water two more times. Sputtering water and teeth chattering loudly, the young woman was a lot more sober than before. "Are you ready to behave and go to bed?" Xena asked sternly, barely able to contain the smile that threatened to reveal itself. Gabrielle shivered and nodded without looking up at the warrior. She followed along repentantly as Xena stepped from the water. The warrior moved to pick up the trembling woman again, but Gabrielle stepped back a pace. "I can walk now, Xe." She sad sadly. Xena looked at her lover and felt her heart slip away all over again. The warrior took a quick step forward, "I know," and instantly the small blonde was lifted into the dark-haired woman's arms. "But I kind of like it this way." She finished, interrupting the sentiment with a tender kiss to her lover's wet forehead. "Come on, my heart... let's get some sleep." * * *
"Oh, Gods!" Gabrielle moaned as she rolled away from the sun that shone into the room, intent on hitting the young Queen straight in the eye. "Gee, feel kind of bad this morning, huh?" Xena appeared beside the bed, a cup in her hand. "I'd have to be dead for a week to feel any worse." Gabrielle groaned, trying to rise to a sitting position. "Here, this will help," the warrior held out the cup.
"Dear Gods, it smells horrible! I don't want to know what's in this, do I?" "Nope," Xena replied. "Look, do you want to have a hangover when we meet with Artemis, or do you want to be right as rain in a couple of candlemarks?" "Well," Gabrielle tentatively stared at the concoction. "I guess I feel like throwing up anyway, a little bit more of that feeling won't kill me." The young Queen swallowed the liquid in two gulps. For a few heartbeats the small blonde looked as if she actually would be sick, but by degrees the greenish caste left her face and her color began to return to normal. Slowly Gabrielle sat up completely, leaning against the head of the bed. She saw the tub full of steaming bath water and looked at the mug of piping hot tea her lover handed her, and was immediately suspicious. "A bath? Did you bring that in here yourself?" "Nope…I roped some of your loyal subjects into it. Boy, did you give them an earful. You were snoring so loud the roof almost fell in." Xena laughed, watching her young lover and sipping on a mug of tea herself. "Xe! I do not snore." "You do when you're drunk. It was kind of a cute, I've never heard you do that before." She laughed again. Gabrielle tried to stretch muscles that seemed tight an uncooperative. "Xe, did we go swimming last night?" Xena laughed aloud. "In a manner of speaking." Then she explained how Gabrielle's amorous attentions drove her to distraction, hence the need for the late night dip. "So, why are you being so nice to me now?" "Well, I do feel a little responsible. I told you to have a good time, and I told
Ep to see that you loosened up a bit. I didn't anticipate that she would ply you with wine to do it, though. Stomach feeling better?" Gabrielle nodded and ran her hands through her hair, wincing and wondering how even her hair could hurt. "Well, I'm going to take Argo out for a long ride. You, soak for a while until you lose that hangover. Don't forget we have to meet with Artemis at midmorning, okay?" Xena said while adjusting her armor. "Yes, dear," Gabrielle smiled at her lover and received a grin in return. "Thanks, Xe." The Queen added. "What for?" "For taking such good care of me." Gabrielle answered. "I kind of like that job." Xena replied. "Xe, what do you think Artemis will say about... us? I mean, after everything that went on, do you still think she'll give her blessing to the marriage?" "Don't worry, she'll be fair." Xena responded, wondering herself at the outcome. In the warrior's mind Gabrielle had passed their tests with ease, but Xena was another matter. Even though the incident with Adrian turned out to be a pack of lies, the warrior did get drunk and she very well could have committed the acts she was accused of. Secretly, she worried that Artemis wouldn't give her blessing to the ceremony. She didn't know what either of them would do in that case. "Hey, she's your aunt... how bad will it be?" Xena said, before winking at her lover and walking out the door. * * *
The young Queen and her warrior both seemed a little more nervous than the first time they stood here waiting for the Goddess to make her appearance. This time when Artemis appeared she ushered both women into the garden. "So, did we--" Gabrielle began, but was interrupted by the Goddess. "Gabrielle," Artemis held up her hand slightly, sinking somewhat wearily onto a marble bench. "I want you to realize that even though you are my niece, by birth, you are also the Queen to my Chosen people. Part of your destiny was to become the Ruler to the Amazons, it was fate, however, that brought you that leadership. It had nothing to do with our family relationship. My desire has always been for a strong Queen to lead my people, to have someone strong enough to Rule by example. You have always done just that, until this recent turn of events. It seems you and your warrior almost came apart at the seams." Artemis watched as the young Queen lowered her head. Her niece didn't burst into tears and beg forgiveness... that was the strength in her. The Goddess smiled inside at the young woman who seemed to internalize everything that happened to her. Gabrielle always thought it was something she had done. Xena came to stand behind her lover, resting her hands on the smaller woman's shoulders. She stood close enough for the young Queen to feel her chest pressed against the blonde's back. "Artemis, that was my fault, not Gabrielle's." Xena argued. "No matter how many people a civilization contains, when it rises, it rises as one... when it falls, it falls as one." Artemis countered. "Xena," Artemis looked thoughtfully at the warrior, "What would you do if
you didn't have my blessing on your Joining?" Xena tensed at the question. She had hoped that Artemis would see their relationship for what is was and what it could be; not the mistake she had so recently made. "Then I suppose we wouldn't be Joined." Xena answered flatly. Tears came to the warrior's eyes knowing her actions had jeopardized her future to take Gabrielle as her wife. Artemis raised an eyebrow at the warrior's answer, but listened as Xena continued. "Without your blessing, the marriage of your Queen could be challenged. I don't want the shame that would bring, for Gabrielle or for the Amazons. I would never leave her side, though. Whether I'm her Consort or her lover, blessed or not, I will never leave her or stop loving her." Xena squeezed Gabrielle's shoulders, placing a soft kiss against the back of her head. "And you, Gabrielle? If I made you choose between my Amazons and a life with this warrior?" Artemis asked. "I'm sorry, Artemis, but I would give up my throne before I would ever leave Xena." Artemis stared at the two. "Xena you failed your test." The Goddess said abruptly. "I'm so sorry, Brie." The warrior wrapped her arms around the smaller woman, Gabrielle resting her hands on the arms that encircled her. "Don't be too sorry. Gabrielle, you failed also." "Wha--?" The warrior and the young Queen said in unison. Artemis stood and paced a small distance before turning back to the two confused lovers.
"Xena, you didn't fail for the reason you're thinking. I wasn't testing your fidelity to your lover, rather your fealty to the Queen." Artemis continued to explain to the perplexed looks of warrior and Queen alike. "Xena, your whole trouble started because you wouldn't get up and leave when the Queen asked you. You sat there and continued to drink until it got you in huge trouble. Granted, you were poisoned and not responsible for all the anger you felt toward Gabrielle, but at one time, when Gabrielle stood there and asked you to leave the party that night. Didn't you know what the right thing to do was? Wasn't there still a little voice that told you to follow Gabrielle?" Xena had searched her heart over this matter so often that she didn't have to think long. "Yes." "That is why you failed. The test wasn't if you would stay loyal to your bed partner. The test was would you remain loyal to your Queen. You may not be Amazon, Xena, but to marry this woman before you, there must be an oath. You must find the strength to swear fealty to Gabrielle as the Queen of this Nation, and like any other Royal Consort; you must follow where she leads. I know that takes a great deal, for a warrior like you, and there will be those around you, friends and foes, that will scoff at you for what they perceive as a weakness. I am here to tell you, my warrior friend, that it takes a warrior of exceptional integrity and strength to follow another's lead." "Gabrielle, my Queen, your bardic memory is so good. Do you remember the exact words I told you the first time you came to visit me, here in my temple?" Gabrielle lifted her head and repeated the words she had gone over a thousand times in her own head since the incident with Adrian.
"You said that ultimate trust is not without its price and that sometimes when all those around you say a thing is black, it is up to you to say it is white. If for no other reason than because your heart says it's so." Artemis nodded at the contrite look on her niece's face. "Your test was your trust in Xena. Gabrielle you are a Queen of one of the fiercest Nations of warrior's Greece will ever know. There will be those who want to see you fall for no other reason than it serves their purpose at the time. You are a woman with an open heart and you can do little to change at this point. It is one of the many qualities that make up who you are. Enemies will use that, however, and see that their chance to hurt and influence you will be through your love for your Consort. When you banished Xena from the village, did you do it out of hurt and pain, or wounded pride?" Artemis asked at last. "I didn't want to look like a fool, so I guess it was out of pride." Gabrielle answered softly. "You will soon learn that the very foundation of your relationship with your Consort is one of trust. If you realize that, then there is nothing that can wedge itself between you, not even the most plausible lie." After a few heartbeats of silence passed, Xena and Gabrielle looked at one another. "So, what happens when both the Queen and her Consort fail the test?" Xena asked. "Actually, that's never happened before. I guess it simply means you're both completely hopeless and you're perfect for each other." The Goddess smiled, her gray eyes sparkling, waiting for the comprehension of her words to strike the two women. "Then we...?" Gabrielle faltered. "Yes, my dear niece and Queen. You have my blessing for a very long and
happy life, officially Bonded together." Gabrielle did what makes her Gabrielle. She threw her arms around the Goddess and surprised the tall woman with her embrace. Like her brother, she looked unsure of how to react, but this was her niece after all, and she found herself returning the affection wholeheartedly. Even Xena and Artemis embraced briefly, the Goddess placing a light kiss on the warrior's cheek. The dark-haired woman accepted the affection with uncharacteristic grace, realizing that all she held dear in the world was now within her grasp. Xena watched Gabrielle spend a few more moments with the tall Goddess, and the warrior couldn't take her eyes off the small blonde. This, to swear fealty and to obey this young woman before her, no matter what, would be the hardest thing Xena would ever do. There would always be a part of the warrior that would think of Gabrielle as the little, hero-worshipping girl that she let follow her out of Amphipolis that day. She had been determined to send her back home the first day. Then on the second day she was going to leave her in the first sizable town they came to. On the third day, her fate had been sealed. And, even though the Fates had caused the two women more grief and heartache than two people had any right to experience, the warrior said a little thank you under her breath, a thank you for that third day.
Atropos, Lachesis, and Clotho all smiled at once. Smiles were a rare occurrence among them, but the warrior's thoughts moved even the Fates. No one had ever thought to thank them before. Lachesis was touched at the gesture and secretly, which was hard to do, kept a promise in her heart. She would someday repay this warrior who stopped to thank them for their work. She watched as the threads moved along, the single thread that looked somewhat thicker than the others, glowed brightly.
* * *
"Are you ready, Gabrielle?" Toris asked the small blonde who paced the anteroom of the temple nervously. "Is it time?" The young Queen questioned, her face a mixed expression of emotions. Gabrielle stopped and the priestess' moved around her, straightening and pulling. Finally determining that the Queen was picture perfect, they bowed and were gone. Four members of the Royal Guard entered the temple bowing before their Queen. Two of them stood ready to open the large wooden doors to the temple, the other two would walk ahead of the Queen and the Amazons that opened the doors would bring up the rear. The two Guards stood poised awaiting the sign from their Queen. Toris held out his arm for Gabrielle and she placed her hand over the tall man's forearm. "Toris... do you think I'm doing the right thing?" Suddenly Gabrielle became terrified at what she was about to do. What if she couldn't keep her warrior happy? A thousand other what ifs ran through her mind. "I find this a most interesting time to ask that question, but yes, I think you're doing the right thing. Gabrielle," Toris stopped and took both of the small woman's hands within his own. "You and Xena love one another, you care for each other, and today you're simply promising in front of witnesses what you've already been promising one another. Besides, Xena is the most bullheaded woman I know and you are surely, just as obstinate. I think you're a match for the ages." He chuckled. Ephiny came in through the side entrance of the temple just as Gabrielle was embracing Toris. "Gabrielle, your guests are getting a little antsy and your warrior is getting a
very terrified look on her face. I think she believes you're standing her up." The Regent smiled at her apprehensive Queen. "Oh, go on, I'm coming." Gabrielle said with a waving motion of her hand. Once they gave Ephiny, who was presiding over the ceremony, enough time to get back, Gabrielle once again took the arm Toris offered. Nodding slightly to the Guards, Gabrielle watched as the large Mahogany doors were opened wide. Every eye turned to the top of the temple steps to watch as a most regal looking Queen and her escort descended. It was perhaps a dozen yards down the steps and to the dais where Xena stood, but Gabrielle thought it was the most frightening promenade she ever took Toris wore the same tunic, pants, and boots as Xena. Everything the brother and sister wore was black and silver, except for the light blue color running up Xena's sleeves and the diagonal red pattern across her chest. Xena's tunic held Gabrielle's crest, while Toris' bore the mark of Amphipolis. The blue indicated her status as the Queen's champion, the red color signifying Amazon Royalty. This was the color of the Egyptian silk dress that Gabrielle wore. Xena watched as her lover walked toward her and today, like every other day she stopped to really look at her bard, she thought the small blonde the most beautiful woman she had ever laid eyes on. Gabrielle's hair was held up and off her neck by two small silver combs, whose designed matched the intricate hooks that fastened the warrior's tunic. The red dress wrapped around the young Queen's body, leaving her arms and shoulders bare of any adornment. Amazons and guests alike bowed when Gabrielle passed by. The young Queen only noticed her warrior, however. Xena looked up from her boots and shook her raven hair from her eyes and Gabrielle's heart melted. The warrior now stood tall and proud and any doubts or fears Gabrielle had, simply vanished. The sapphire gaze connected with the viridian eyes that displayed very openly, the young Queen's heart. The love and commitment
that were being shared here today caused both women to swallow hard at its significance. Toris moved aside as Gabrielle mounted the steps to the dais. Everyone witnessing the Bonding ceremony waited for this moment to arrive. Once Gabrielle stopped in front of her lover, it was expected that the warrior would swear her fealty to the Queen in some way. Most everyone attending expected a perfunctory bow from the Warrior Princess. There were a very few only, that realized to what extent the warrior was willing to go to for her Queen. When Gabrielle came to a stop before the Regent and her warrior, Xena not only dropped to one knee, but bowed her head and remained that way until a gentle touch from her lover, brought her to her feet again. It seemed a small gesture to some, but for those who knew the warrior from Amphipolis, they realized what it signified. Anyone with ears to hear; heard the sound of one heart surrendering to another. The traditional ceremony went as planned and the Joining belt was wrapped around the two lovers clasped hands. Ephiny's voice rang out as she said the words that hadn't been spoken within the Amazon village for ten lifetimes. "The Queen has taken a Consort. What the Goddess Artemis has blessed, let no other God nor mortal man seek to destroy." The Regent proclaimed. The Queen and her Consort consummated the words with a kiss and the party began. * * *
"We've spent have the evening mingling and thanking people, is it time yet, my Queen?" Xena whispered into Gabrielle's ear.
The small blonde was having exactly the same thought. Well, that thought and a lot of others that included her Consort. "Oh yes," Gabrielle nodded. "Let me go ahead, okay? I want to get out of this and... well, just give me a quarter of a candlemark." "I could help," the warrior said helpfully with a gleam in her eye. "Xe, it took me a good candlemark to get in this thing. Just... have another drink, allright?" Xena smiled and watched as her wife walked to their hut, two Royal Guards close behind. The warrior found a mug of wine thrust into her hand, Ephiny pulling Xena's eyes away from the small blonde's figure. "You're supposed to give the new bride some time to prepare." The Regent explained. "Eph, it's not like Gabrielle's a... I mean, we've been lovers for nearly a season." Xena answered. "Yea, but you've never made love as a Joined couple... puts a whole new spin on things." "So, where did you learn so much about married couples?" Xena asked. "Well, my warrior friend, while you had our Queen, and I mean the term quite literally, doing the Gods know what all over the Greek countryside, I was back here officiating at half a dozen Bonding Ceremonies a season!" Ephiny answered with a grin. "Here... you have a drink and by the time you're finished, your Queen will be more than ready." Ephiny grinned again, but more at the look of frustration on the warrior's face. * * *
Gabrielle saw the scroll the moment she entered the hut. It was set on the table with a tag that said, read me. She knew the precise angular mark of the quill belonged to Xena, so she waited until she removed her dress and changed into a new silk robe before sitting down to read it. When the young Queen opened the parchment, she realized it was a poem and smiled. Xena rarely wrote, but on the occasions she had, it was usually something heartfelt and profound. The top of the scroll read very simply... TO MY WIFE ON THE DAY OF OUR MARRIAGE I don't always express how I feel but on this day, the first day of our life as one I say to you, Love comes and goes but only once do you find your soulmate where two souls become as one. Dreams, thoughts, and desires flow freely between two. Although our styles may differ somewhat, in reality they are exactly the same One may want to shout from the hilltops the other stands back in silence but our love is the same. As soulmates I would never betray you, my heart Because being as one, I would only have dishonored myself For you are part of me. Even in times of despair when there is no light when things are not as they seem search deep inside , Gabrielle , to find our love. Our hearts and souls are intertwined
our love and passion is undeniable we were destined to be one. Destined to share all the laughter and joy, the sadness and grief, the worries and jobs. Our love is etched in my heart, and our future is etched in the stars. Never be afraid to reach for them I will always be there to catch you when you fall. I have waited so long to say these words to you. Since I first met you, I have somehow changed, I am a better person because of you you are all the goodness in me. Sometimes without a word, or even a look we know the others' thoughts Soulmates are one for ever and ever. I will love and cherish you til the end of eternity.
Gabrielle sat for some time with the scroll in her lap, tears running down her face. She had never known such happiness in her life. "It was supposed to make you happy, not make you cry." Xena's voice said softly from the doorway. "It has made me happy, love... so happy I had to cry." Gabrielle smiled through her tears at her Consort. "I still don't think I get that, but I'll take your word for it." Xena said softly. The warrior wanted a present that Gabrielle would love and she congratulated herself on her choice. Her wife was a woman of words. They
touched her heart and filtered into her soul like nothing else could. Xena knew that to satisfy a woman such as this, she would have to give her words. The warrior's gift was twofold, however. Xena not only gave her bard words, but she gave of herself. No one would ever know this woman, the one that revealed herself so fully to her new wife. Only this Amazon Queen could ever penetrate the heart buried beneath walls of past pain. Brick by brick, the small blonde tore away the barrier until she finally found the woman within. Xena could have told her it wasn't worth the trouble, but Gabrielle thought differently. The young Queen happened to think she had found the very best that life had to offer and Xena found out that it was impossible to argue with an Amazon. * * *
"Gabrielle, you are so beautiful."
I removed my clothes and knelt before her as she still sat in the chair. She had never asked me to disrobe in front of her before, not simply for her own pleasure. It was because it brought her pleasure that I complied, just as I would do anything to make my bard happy. I could feel the weight of her stare and the green eyes burned with a viridescent fire. I parted her legs and moved closer to her body and when the silk robe she wore fell open, and the treasures underneath were exposed, I wanted more than anything to feel her against me. I drew her body to me until I could feel her center pressed against my belly and we both groaned at the contact. Only one moon had gone by and it felt like an entire season. As if I didn't already crave her touch, the kiss we shared simply took on a life of its own and set me on fire. She entwined her fingers in my hair and I could feel the strength in her arms as she pulled me harder against her. Wrapping her legs around my waist, I could feel her wetness as she
gently rocked her hips against me. I slid my hands lower, caressing and massaging her backside, squeezing her against me, assisting in the rhythm she already set. In all this time my lips never left hers. Finally I broke away to taste the rest of her skin, her face, her neck, her shoulders. She leaned back and moaned as my lips found a nipple. I let the tip of my tongue tease the erect nub only slightly before wrapping my lips around the pebbled flesh. It was second nature by now, making love to her. I knew what she liked and when she wanted it. I started to suck on the offered breast tenderly at first. Then those fingers still wrapped in my hair pulled me against her harder. "Please." Gabrielle murmured.
I sucked harder, pulling at the hardened nub with my teeth, flicking over it with my tongue. It thrilled me to feel her silent shivers as I made love to her breasts. I wanted to tell her how extraordinary I thought she was and how exquisite she felt in my arms. I wanted her to know that the hardness of her nipple within my mouth was getting me wetter by the heartbeat, but, I'm not a woman of words. Instead I let my body tell her all I wanted her to know. There were no words I could utter at that moment, but she felt my passion for her when she reached down and dipped her index finger to my cleft. She felt my possessiveness as my mouth sought to mark her as mine, and finally she knew my strength when I stood, carrying her in my arms to make my way to the bed. I sat on the bed and she straddled my lap. I reached down between her legs to feel her. Her drenched apex nearly threw me into an orgasm right there. She moaned, pressing herself hard against the palm of my hand. Her hips worked faster, but I pulled back. "I want to taste you." I whispered to her and she moaned her pleasure at the thought.
I lay down with my back flat on the bed and she crawled up my body, straddling my face. I moved onto the center of the bed a little more and she grasped the rails of the headboard, leaning over me. Her scent was beyond arousing to my overloaded senses. I let my tongue run up her inner thigh to sample her wetness, the muscles in her legs tightening in anticipation. I let my warm breath blow across her center and she grunted with satisfaction. I knew my wife well and I snaked one arm around her waist, while holding onto her hip with the other. The instant I ran my tongue along the entire length of her sex, she bucked against me, burying my mouth within the blond curls. She groaned, as did I. the taste of her was unlike anything or anyone I'd ever had. The deeper I slipped my tongue inside her, the louder her moans and the wetter she became. I lapped at the sweet fluid coming from her and opened my mouth to moan against her. The vibration sent chills through her and she called out my name, beginning to grind her hips onto my mouth. I loved the way she rolled her hips on top of me, forcing my tongue even deeper within her. I drew back, but she only whimpered for a heartbeat until she realized that I was moving toward my goal. I flicked the hooded nub of flesh with my tongue until it began to swell in arousal, Gabrielle began to softly chant my name. It wouldn't be long before she exploded. I could already feel her wetness begin to increase again, warning of her climax. Her thrusts against my tongue became more forceful and frantic. "Gods, yes... oh, Xe... please, don't stop, oh, Gods don't stop. Your fingers... now..."
I wrapped my lips around the hard bundle of nerves, sucking softly as I pressed two fingers into her opening. She pumped herself with abandon on my fingers and when I heard her breathing change to a ragged gasping; I sucked the nub hard between my teeth and ever so gently bit down. It was that technique that always brought her to climax. I could hear
her scream, but only barely as my focus was on containing every drop of her precious essence on my tongue. I eased my tongue from her center, but I continued the motion of my fingers inside her. I pressed high and hard, curling my fingers against the spot that she needed to feel. She exploded again, this time I could feel the warm wetness running down my hand as she shivered and convulsed against my fingers. Gods, woman! I wanted to tell her that she was so rapturously beautiful at that moment of orgasm. That for as long as I lived there would be no other lover who could possibly compare. No other lover who could possibly make me feel anywhere close to the way I feel when loving her. I wanted to tell her so much, yet all I could do at that moment was cry. Her breathing returning to normal, she moved off my body and lay next to me, taking my mouth in a kiss that reminded me that my own arousal was far from sated. She ran her tongue along my lips, sharing in her sweet musky taste, then she kissed the tears from my cheeks. "Tears, my love?" She whispered.
I smiled a little lopsided smile just for her. "You told me it was possible to be so happy you just had to cry." * * *
I pulled back to look at her, I suppose to see if she was making fun of me. She enjoyed teasing me and I admit to liking the attention, but this time she was serious. I wiped the tears from her cheeks and my heart felt like it would swell and explode from my chest. My warrior could say so much without uttering a single word and her tears told me far more about her
undying love for me than a profession from her lips ever could have. I moved my body on top of hers and ran my kisses along her jaw to her ear, where I began to whisper softly. I knew she was already in a state, but whereas she will let her body talk for her, I on the other hand use my tongue in a variety of ways to please her. I let my imagination run wild and soon I have her groaning and grinding her hips into the mattress as I explain in great detail what I will do and how I will touch her. She parts her legs wide and I press my knee into the wet flesh. Gods, she is dripping wet! I ease back on the pressure I place on her center and I can hear her whimper at the loss. She grabs by backside and pulls me into her, moaning as the increased pressure causes a greater friction on the large swollen bundle of nerves. She begins to thrust against me like that, but I force myself to slow her down. I ease the pace by kissing and licking every inch of exposed skin I can find. By the time I get close to her breast, she is already pleading. "Please, Brie... suck me... Oh, Gods, harder."
I do as she asks and she is beside herself. I am always amazed that I am able to elicit these sounds from this warrior. She has had so many skilled lovers, yet it's always my name she cries out as her body throws itself over the precipice, into the arms of orgasm. I pull my lips away from the erect nipple and she groans in frustration, but in the same breath she cries out as I slip my fingers into the wet silkiness of her sex. I stay as far from the sensitive bit of flesh as I can; I want this to last for her. My fingers trace her outer lips and continue slipping inside to spread the abundant moisture along every fold and crevice. "You like the way, this feels?" I ask, knowing the answer, but I want to hear
her tell me anyway. "Oh, yesss... Oh, baby... it feels so good."
I feel her hand slide down her body and suddenly her fingers are sliding
in her wetness along with my own. She takes my hand and slides it into her opening. A low long growl escapes from her throat. "I want all of you inside me, Brie... please, baby."
She knows she has only to tell me what she wants and I will be glad to comply, besides the feel of her already has my own center damp again, as I straddle her thigh and rub myself against her muscled leg. She spreads herself wide allowing my hand to enter her completely. Her eyes are closed and she remains still while I give her the time she needs to accommodate my whole hand inside of her. Finally I feel her begin to rock against my hand. She raises her leg slightly and I cry out at the marvelous pressure that puts on my center. I press my legs together slightly, lost in the sensation of being inside her and feeling her wellmuscled thigh between my legs. I begin to move my hand and my own hips in time to her thrusts. Her hips rise up in silent plea and I watch as her smile turns feral, her groans increase as I move deeper and harder. She asks for more of both and I refuse her nothing. I am always amazed at the feel of my whole hand rocking inside of her. The movement of her hips grows frantic and I struggle to keep up the motion of my hand while my center begins to catch fire. "Gods, Xena."
I cry out and I feel her body begin a small series of tremors, her thighs tremble and finally her back arches and she is still. She is frozen within her passion while I continue the motion of my hand inside her. I feel her inner muscles contract around my fingers and clamp down around my wrist. The cry that tears from her throat is what sends me over the edge to follow her. Our bodies shudder and convulse as we hold on to one another. My hand carefully slips from her and I do what it is that bards do. I cradle
her in my arms and whisper words of love into her ear. Some of the things I say probably make no sense, but the words gentle my warrior until we are both breathing normally again. "I love you, my wife." She says softly before the whole day catches up to
her and she uncharacteristically falls asleep before me. "And, I you, my Consort." I return, not knowing if she has heard me before
falling into the realm of Morpheus. * * *
Princess Jordan's party prepared to ride out as the Queen and her Consort said their farewells and thanks. "Jordan, you're welcome in this village anytime you would like to visit." Gabrielle said. "Gabrielle, Xena," the young Princess returned, "I have never felt so well cherished by friends before. I pray that our Nations become prosperous and that we will always be allies." Before mounting their horses, Adrian came to take Gabrielle's hand. Xena stood behind the Queen, her hands resting protectively on the smaller woman's shoulders. While Gabrielle had befriended the Captain, Xena glared, not knowing if she would ever be able to forgive the woman for the pain the Queen and her Consort suffered because of her lies. The Captain stood a little stiff, but the scars on her back would be a while in healing. She had no words for the small Queen, but hoped her eyes would convey what was in her heart. "Good luck, Adrian. Be well." Gabrielle said, smiling.
Adrian returned the smile, knowing the Queen had seen what was in her heart. They began to mount and the soldiers around Princess Jordan began talking as they rode away. "So," began one of the women under Adrian's command. "Is that what the great Warrior Princess is going to settle for? The heart of that farm girl... a Potidaean?" "No, Adrian smiled, looking back at the small blonde and the tall warrior. "The heart of a Queen." THE END
THE QUEEN OF MY HEART DISCLAIMER:
Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, etc. are ©copyright MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. I don't own them, I just play with them for a while and, like the good girl I am, I put them back when I'm done…okay, they get a little worn, but hey…I play hard! Absolutely no Copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fiction. It's intended as flattery toward the creators, writers, and actors of the characters. All other characters that appear are ©copyright
[email protected]. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies may be made for private use only and I'd appreciate if you included all copyright notices and this disclaimer. VIOLENCE WARNING: There is some violence (come on it's the Warrior Princess). It's nothing more than
PG13. SPOILER ALERT: Many of the episodes from seasons 1-4 are glanced over. Be warned if you haven't yet seen
them. TIMELINE: My own making. Instead of Xenaverse... it's Gabrielleverse! Let's just say that India never
happened, Eli never sucked the bard into buying what he was selling, and Gabrielle never became a wimp and tossed her staff away. SEX: Yes, I'll have some, thank you. Ooops! I mean, yes there is. It is our favorite two Soulmates, after all. It's
not gratuitous, but it is quite explicit when it gets going. This story shows consensual love, sex and yes, even some light bdsm between two adult females. Even when they get carried away, it's all done in love. If the thought of two women in a loving/sexual relationship bothers you…well, as Xena said, "Bite me!" HIGH ANGST WARNING: I was threatened within an inch of my life if I didn't start putting this disclaimer on
some (all?) of my work. I will henceforth rate the angst content with sad faces, one being the lowest and four being the highest. This story earns: 2 sad faces for those without TT Fonts UNDERAGE WARNING: Hey, the Supreme Court said in Reno v. American Civil Liberties Union (1997) that
laws against making available, online, certain "indecent" materials for those under 18 was unconstitutional… look it up! Besides, this is perfectly "decent." I only know how others feel about my stories from feedback. Let me know what you think... homophobes need not apply, however. I'm at:
[email protected] This is the fourth story in the "Queen" series. While not absolutely necessary, it helps if you read them in sequence. The series begins with To Become A Queen and follows with Quest For A Queen, and The Heart of a Queen.
THE QUEEN OF MY HEART
I DON'T KNOW why, but I felt the uneasiness set in the moment we decided to make a visit to the Amazon village. My anxiety grew with every step we took. I couldn't say for what reason, but it set me on edge, a fact my beautiful wife was quick to notice. I knew she was aware that something was bothering me, but like the intelligent wife she was, she simply raised an eyebrow at my edginess and silently kept the pace, walking ahead of me. We were perhaps three days south of the village and that night as we slept under the stars, Gabrielle awoke screaming. She threw herself into my arms sobbing once I settled my nerves enough to pry my hand away from the hilt of my sword. Her scream, an ear splitting sound, hastened the end of my life by a good five summers, I'm sure. I wrapped my arms around her shivering body and pulled her close to me. She lay so tightly against me I could feel her heartbeat pounding out of control.
"Sshh, baby, it's allright... just a bad dream." "Oh, Xe, it felt so real. I thought... I thought I lost you." "I'm right here, my heart. You haven't lost me anywhere." I replied. Once I soothed her nerves, by holding her and whispering words of love and comfort to her, she quieted enough to tell me the dream. I never ignored Gabrielle's dreams, even though they may seem only nightmares to another. My wife's dreams have an unusual way of coming to pass, albeit in bits and pieces. Now, with the knowledge of her heritage, it does not surprise me that she has a touch of the oracle in her. I reached away from her momentarily and stretched out the length of my body. Gabrielle gathered wood earlier and set aside two small logs in case the night turned cold. I tossed the logs she gathered on the glowing pile of embers and the dry wood immediately took spark and flamed. The warmth and the light, not to mention me, holding her in my protective embrace; aided in her comfort and she finally settled against me in relief. "You got sick, Xe and I couldn't make you understand me. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't get through to you, but I heard you. In my mind I heard you talking to me and telling me it would be allright." "Then that should show you that it's nothing too serious, Brie. Number one, I never get sick and even if I do, I heal so fast that I feel better in no time. Second, if I was telling you in your dream that everything would be okay, then I'm sure it will turn out that way." I responded confidently. "That's the only problem. When you told me things would be allright... your voice didn't sound like you believed it." Gabrielle said with worry. I could only stare at her for a few heartbeats. What could I say? That I would never lie to her if the prognosis looked grim? She knew me better than that, hence her fear. "I'll do my level best to stay healthy. I'll drink a mug of medicinal herb tea
every morning, will that help?" I asked her as I tilted her chin up and grinned. Once her beautiful eyes met mine, she returned the small grin and nodded her head. When she leaned forward to kiss me, the weight of her body pushed my back flat against the bedroll and all I could do was moan at the sweetness of those lips and the feel of her body against mine. Her caresses became more earnest and suddenly my body felt the way it always does with Gabrielle draped across it. A slow fire began to burn in my belly and there was only one thing that would quench it, this woman's touch. I pulled back before I went further than Gabrielle wanted. She just awoke from some startling visions and being held may have been all she had in mind. I needed to know now, so I could douse the sparks that were quickly turning into flames, burning hot and settling right between my legs. She looked into my eyes and I could see her need burning as fiercely as my own. I growled and moved to take control when I felt her hands press against my shoulders, stopping me from going any further. "Please, Xe... I need... let me make love to you." She said softly. I've never heard Gabrielle use that phrase before... I need. I could instantly see the truth in her eyes. She looked as if she needed to ground herself, to find some way to purge the mental images that recently haunted her sleep. I would never deny this woman anything and I wonder if she knows it. Besides, I think, as a small smile comes to my lips. There are far worse ways to spend an evening, but few better than to be made love to by an Amazon Queen. I pull her close to me once more and we kiss. Just before our lips touch; just as they are delicately brushing together, I whisper to her. The vibration against her mouth causes her to smile. "Yesss." I whisper slowly, and then I give myself up to her talented body. I close my eyes and revel in the feel of her naked skin pressed against
mine, her legs straddling my thigh. We do nothing but kiss for a long time and that seems to be enough at first. Our kisses are slow and loving, more of an exploration, really, as our tongues meet and small jolts of energy pass between us. I feel myself floating on a wave of pure pleasure, sensations washing over me in a torrent of passion. Gabrielle's mouth presses harder; becomes more insistent, more demanding. My body begins to betray me in more ways than one. Gentle moans filled the air and I am actually surprised that it is the sound of my own voice I am hearing. Gabrielle's hands seem to be everywhere at once and soon her lips follow, and that tongue, by the Gods, where did she learn that?! My moans turn into whimpers of need and I silently curse myself. I meant to hold out far longer than this, but the woman was turning my body into six feet of liquid fire. She settled her attentions on my breasts, using her lips and tongue to stroke the tender flesh into submission. It wasn't much of a battle; I surrendered immediately. Her mouth wrapped around a dark colored nipple and although her seduction started out softly enough, she was soon sucking the pebbled flesh hard between her lips and teeth, tugging at the taut flesh with the voracity of a starving newborn. "Oh, yesss, Brie... just like that," I moan in ecstasy. I don't need to tell her that, she knows exactly what I like and how I like it. My fingers entwine in her golden hair and press her mouth even harder to my chest, but even that gesture is habit and completely unnecessary. There is no fear that she will pull away for any reason. She will not stop until I've had my fill and she tells me so, murmuring the words against my skin, into the hollow between my breasts. Secure in that knowledge, I relax just a little bit more and give my mind as well as my body up to her. She slides down my body to settle between my legs and in the state I'm in it feels as if she is liquid and simply flows along my skin to her destination, pooling in the spot where I need her the most. She kisses the dark triangle of hair and I feel her pause. If I were more in control of my body I would smile. I love the habit she has of pausing ever so slightly before tasting me.
It's always the same. She breathes deeply as if it will be the last time that I will allow her this pleasure. She takes one long, languid stroke against my sex and immediately I groan at the tenderness of the caress, lifting my hips higher toward the source of the pleasure. My body shudders and there is nothing I can do to stop the involuntary motion. The warm wetness of her tongue slides within every fold until I am gasping as the muscle slips slowly inside of me. There is a certain deliberateness to her actions and I try to hang on, letting my body simply experience the pleasure of it all. Thank the Gods she has avoided the bundle of nerves that is now swollen and pulses insistently. Gods, she knows how to play me! By now I am clenching handfuls of the bedroll, my hips rising and falling to keep up a steady motion against the rhythm of Gabrielle's strokes. I know the sounds that I am making are probably waking up the whole forest, but I am helpless to stop. My legs begin to tremble; I spread them wider in silent invitation for my wife to take all of me that she will. That's when she does. She presses the flat of her tongue in a firm swipe across the hooded bundle of nerves that swells even more at the exquisite contact. "Gods, yesss, Brie. Stoke it... just... like... oh, Gods!" I explode from within before I can even finish my thought. It didn't matter because my wife knew exactly what I was going to say and she did exactly what I meant. The roar I heard was surely my own voice, but I only heard it from within a fog. I was lost in a place created of absolute delectation. I could barely feel my own body continue to shiver and twitch as Gabrielle proceeded to lap at the fluid between my legs, careful not to lose a drop. * * *
I hear her stir in the bedroll and know she is awake before her eyes are
even open. I sit there, cross-legged on the ground and tug a length of heavy twine through a piece of leather that holds the stirrup to Argo's saddle. As was my habit, I rose just before dawn. It was something inside of me that bid me to rise at that hour every morning, I'd been that way since I was a small child. My wife stretched and I suddenly find my hand poised in mid air over my work. How does she do that to me? She looks around the small camp, her sleepy eyes landing on me and suddenly I am alive. No, correction, suddenly I am living for her. It's as if everything I do, everything that I think and feel, suddenly revolves around her. I don't understand it, the Gods know I ponder it often enough, even dwell on the amazement of it, but I never... ever question it. That would be as insulting as questioning a gift. When something is truly wonderful and it is given to you without thought of whether you deserve it or not, you should never ask why. So, she flashes bright green eyes my way and I look at her and grin. It's a goofy grin, she's told me so on many occasions, but when I look at her, especially after the incredible passion we shared last night, I simply can't keep the grin from my face "Morning, love... you let me sleep late," Gabrielle murmured, looking up at the sun's position in the sky. "Well, we're not in any big hurry." "Hey, you've already caught breakfast!" She remarked after her nose alerted her to the scent of cooking fish. I smile proudly, looking over at the three fish that were gutted and stuck on long sticks leaning over the heat of the fire. I take a lot of teasing, mostly from Gabrielle, my mother, and anyone else that either has a death wish or feels just plain suicidal, about my culinary talents. I admit, I'm not much of a cook. I was never the kind of a daughter that hung around the kitchen with my mother. I was too busy fishing and riding with my little brother for that. There are days, though, and I would never admit this to my mother even upon pain of death, but there are days when I wished I'd learned just a tad
more from Cyrene. I can stick anything on a spit and cook it and if you don't mind the burned bits it's really not too bad, you just have to pick off the really black parts. Because of this, it was a small treat for my wife to wake up to find breakfast already cooking. Gabrielle rose and checked the fish, moving them further from the fire. "I'm going to take a bath, I'll be back before they're done. Do you mind?" She looked at me then after she had soap and a towel, and a few other items in her hands. I registered the look on her face and realized I had my tongue hanging out look fixed on my naked wife. I don't know why I do that or at least why I can't be a little more subtle about it. People would think that Gabrielle was the woman of the world and I, the inexperienced one in our relationship. All I could do was give her that; I've been caught sort of half-smile and blush in embarrassment. Gabrielle smiled sweetly and without a word she reached out and gently stroked my cheek. This was her way of thanking me for the compliment my eyes were paying her. It didn't matter that she was twenty-four summers old, I think that when she is old and gray I will still be looking through love's eyes and thinking lascivious thoughts of her. I watch approvingly as she picks up her staff before strolling down to the stream. She was out of my line of sight, but I could hear the soft splashing noises she made in the water. I sensed her good mood and was glad that the memories of last evening's nightmares didn't continue to haunt her. Gabrielle and I would be married for a full year in another two moons. Gods, will it be the Summer Solstice already? I remember back to the time, just before our joining ceremony, when we discovered that Apollo was Gabrielle's real father. It's no mystery to me now as to why my wife's dreams are tinged through with prophecy. Considering her parentage, it's a surprise she doesn't have more powers than she does. Apollo mentioned in a conversation with me that Gabrielle has powers to rival a full Goddess, but her powers are a natural part of her. No, she can't pop around within the universe, but he explained that her goodness and compassion exceeds that of ordinary mortals, the tremendous capacity for
selfless love that resides within her heart, being one of those powers. I smile now remembering that conversation... as if I needed a God to tell me that. I could have told anyone that about Gabrielle. Apollo did speak to both Gabrielle and I at length one evening by the fire. He told Gabrielle that she had access to a great many hidden powers that she could cultivate if she cared to. He explained that should the time come when she had a desire to learn more about these godly talents, he would be happy to instruct her. My wife politely told her father that she had no desire to accumulate any more power than she already had. I, personally, think that she still remembers the incident with the Titans... she doesn't say it, but I can see the remorse in her eye at the feeling of once having wielded such power only to have abused it. When the two of us were alone, we discussed it at length. I was often sorry that the life we chose to lead didn't afford me the kind of money that would have made Gabrielle's life easier. I guess I always want Gabrielle to have the best of everything and I told her so. I don't think I will ever forget the look of absolute devotion in her eyes when she tenderly kissed me and told me that as long as she had my love, she already had the best of everything. Gods! How the woman can leave me speechless sometimes. * * *
"Boadicea?" Gabrielle asked hesitantly. "Unh uh," I shake my head. It's turning out to be a beautiful early summer day and my wife and I walk along the worn path, Argo enjoying the rest that using my own legs gives her. Gabrielle and I pass the time traveling in many ways. We often play this guessing game, and I still love the way Gabrielle is determined to beat me. My favorite way to travel is in silence, but I rarely get that, not while
Gabrielle is in a good mood anyway. When her mood is light, she chatters on about everything under the stars and I nod and grunt in what I think are the appropriate places. After almost six seasons together you'd think I'd be used to it, but Gods, the girl can talk! I suddenly realize I am walking by myself and turn around to see my wife standing there with her hands on her slim hips arching an eyebrow at me. Arching her eyebrow at me... can you believe it? By the Gods, I perfected the move! "What?" I ask, trying to muster as much innocence into my voice as I can. I only pray that she doesn't get the Godly ability to read my mind. "You've got that grin on your face." Gabrielle smirked. I could feel my face start to get hot. "I swear, Brie, I was not thinking about you that way." "Oh, I know that," she began as she walked to catch up to me. "It's that other grin you've got going. I've known you long enough to know the difference between your, I want her and I want her now grin and the smile that just tugs at the corners of your lips when you're thinking Gods I love her, but I wish she'd just be quiet for half a candlemark." I chuckled out loud that I'd been caught, which earned me an unexpected swat in the stomach. It wasn't very hard, though. Gabrielle rapped her knuckles more than once against my armor and she was beginning to learn that she had to wait until I got into the bedroll at night to whack me. I am constantly amazed that the woman who sets down a scroll and a quarter of a candlemark later, can't remember where she put it, that this woman can remember that my eyes lingered a heartbeat longer than necessary on a pretty barmaid, and will backhand me in the stomach for the infraction as I close my eyes to sleep. "Oh, I got it," Gabrielle stopped moving and grabbed my arm, "it's Cyane!" She said excitedly.
I turned and grabbed her arm in the same fashion, the same excitement on my face. That's when I gave her an evil little grin and said breathlessly, "Nope." "Oh, you!" She laughed and slapped my arm. I caught her around the waist and pulled her to me for no other reason than to feel her lips on mine and to tell her how happy she made me. She smiled up at me and I realized how far my life had come in six seasons, all due to the woman I now held in my arms. We slowly pulled away and began to walk again. I realized that now was as good a time to talk to my wife as any. It was still hard for me to open up and bare my feelings, even around Gabrielle, but she has taught me that communication is the key ingredient to our having a successful relationship. So, I push aside the feelings of embarrassment I get whenever I express my heart and begin to feel Gabrielle out on the subject. "Brie... have you ever thought about us settling down someplace? You know, having trouble come to us instead of going out and looking for it?" I asked, joking at the end so as not to sound too serious. "Have you?" Gabrielle returned immediately. "Don't answer a question with a question." "You do it all the time." She reminded me. "Yea, well... that's me. It's okay when I do it." I answered with a grin. She nudged me in the arm and slipped her hand within mine as we walked. "I guess I'd be lying if I said that I never thought about us settling somewhere permanently, finally giving up the road as a way of life, maybe even raising a child." Gabrielle answered tentatively. I felt a familiar pain pull at my heart and knew that it made its way to my
face when I looked at Gabrielle. "I'm sorry, Xe," she said quickly, lowering her eyes from mine, "I know that since Solon..." "No, my heart, that's not it," I tried to reassure her. I knew she was feeling guilty again over the circumstances that led to my son's death, but those were hurts we'd forgiven one another for ages ago. I stopped and turned to face her, gently cupping her face in both my hands. "Do you know that I would do anything for you, my heart? If you asked for the Golden Fleece, I'd go on a journey tomorrow to get it for you. If you asked me to give you a child... Brie, that's the one thing in this life that I can't give to you. What's worse is that the only obvious way for you to have a child would be for you to do something that I don't know if I can handle. I don't know if I could take the idea of you being with anyone else, even if it is just for that reason." I stopped speaking because I knew that if I kept talking I would only make more of a fool of myself. I could already feel hot tears burning my eyes and brusquely brushed away the few that spilled out onto my cheeks. Okay this was why I didn't bare my feelings more. I always end up in tears, a very unwarrior thing to do. "Oh, Xe," Gabrielle said softly as she pressed herself close to me. She laid her cheek against my chest, just above my armor and I wrapped my arms around her and kissed the top of her head. "First of all, we're not really at that point in our lives yet, are we?" She pulled away to look at me and I had to laugh at myself. I smiled through the tears and admitted that I was doing what my wife usually did. I was worrying about things that were a long way off for us yet. "No, we're not exactly at that point." I answered hoarsely. Gabrielle smiled and wiped the rest of the tears from my face. Besides, I feel exactly the same as you do about it, Xe. When the time is right, we'll
both know it and maybe by then," she kissed my chin, "well, maybe by then we can see if those Godly powers my father talks about include things like that. I mean, there ought to be some perks to being Apollo's daughter, huh?" My wife smiled up at me, and it was plain to see that she was in her take care of the warrior mode. Even though I would never openly admit it to anyone but her, I had fears and insecurities just like the rest of humanity. Gabrielle was the only one I would ever voice those concerns to. She was the only person that I didn't feel weak around for having those feelings. "I love you, Brie." I whispered and kissed her in a way that would convince her of the fact. "You do know that if you wanted a baby... I wouldn't put up a fight?" I said as my way of apologizing for being selfish. "I know, love, but let's reverse our positions here. If you were the one who was going to carry our child, do you honestly picture me casually standing by while you did it with some guy... even if it was just to get pregnant?" I couldn't help it, I know my wife too well. I snorted and gave her my best smirk. Gabrielle turns into a fury if another woman even licks her lips while looking me over. I picture her ripping the arms off any man brave enough to want to assist us in starting our family. "I see you've gotten the picture. So, do you know what I mean when I tell you I understand where you're coming from?" "Yes, love I do," I answered with a chuckle. "Of, course don't look like it will never happen. We do know that you're perfectly capable of having a healthy baby." I arched my eyebrow at the young woman. "Oh, don't look at me that way," Gabrielle nudged me. "Are you going to stand there and tell me that you honestly don't remember what a wonderful feeling it was to have a life growing inside you?"
I searched my mind and was surprised at how quickly the memories surfaced. I felt alone and scared most of the time that I carried Solon. I was a different woman back then. I was only interested in being a Warlord, of having power and all that came with it. Perhaps if I had cared for Borias more, if I'd been in love with him instead of in lust, I would have felt differently. I do remember what Gabrielle was referring to, however. It was sort of a feeling of awe that a real live thing was growing inside of you. I realized I was lost in my thoughts for a few moments when I looked down to see Gabrielle smiling back up at me. She knew from the look on my face that what she said was true. I touched her face tenderly as a sign of agreement. Of course, being who I am, I couldn't just let it go. "Yea, well... do you want to know what I remember most about being pregnant?" "What?" Gabrielle said excitedly, falling right into my trap. "Oh... throwing up about three times a day, never getting a decent night's sleep because I had to make a trip out to the bushes about twice a night, and getting so huge even Argo looked terrified when I went to mount her." Gabrielle laughed and put her arm around my waist. "Yea, but it was worth it all, wasn't it?" "Yea... it was." I added softly, slipping my own arm around her shoulders as we walked. "So, you could do it again..." Gabrielle trailed off, with a slight grin. "I was a lot younger back then! Kind of around the age you are right now. No, my heart, when the time comes, you get to have all our babies." I laughed. "Babies? As in more than one?" Gabrielle pulled away slightly to look into my eyes, her own filled with amusement.
"Well, I... uh..." How do I get such a tiny tongue so twisted in knots? I stammered, which I only end up doing in front of either Gabrielle or my mother. My wife's lilting laughter filled my senses. "Don't worry, Xe... when the time comes, I'll be more than happy to have your children." I reached over and kissed her cheek and we continued to walk along like that. I let out the fact that someday I would like to see us settled and with children, that was a big step for me. Neither one of us knew when, but at least we were on the same path with our thinking. I also let it slip that just one child would probably not be enough. I mean, if you're going to raise a child you might as well do a few of them at once, right? "So, when someday arrives... where would you like to start a home?" I asked. "Mmm, I thought you might want to live in Amphipolis, help Cyrene with the Inn?" Gabrielle answered. "Oh, sweetheart, I love my mother, but if I had to live by her I'd probably end up killing her." "Then I guess the logical place would be with the Amazons." Gabrielle said with some hesitation. We both pretty much knew that the Amazon village would be where we would live out our lives. I was Consort to the Amazon Queen and that meant that neither of our lives were completely our own. The day we were Joined I knelt and swore an oath to follow and obey her as my Queen. On the road, I was in charge of our lives, but once we permanently settled with the Amazons and Gabrielle took invariable possession of her crown, I would be living under her rule. I would be the Queen's Consort, Champion to her throne, and resident warrior. No longer would I carry the feared title of Warrior Princess that those throughout Greece knew me by. I wondered if I was ready for that kind of anonymity.
It was for these reasons that my wife was using such a tentative voice. It was also why she was looking at me with that expectant expression on her face, which I could see from out of the corner of my eye. I wanted to dispel any thoughts from her head that would lead her to believe I would not follow her to the ends of the known world. I repeated the words that I told her on the night I gave her the amulet that she now wears around her throat. "I go where you go, my Queen…my home is where you are." * * *
It was two days later when we reached the edge of Amazon land. The familiar sound of ropes falling from the trees above us gave way to the site of masked warriors, immediately recognizing us and kneeling at our feet. Gabrielle had long ago become accustomed to her subject's actions upon her arrival back onto Amazon land, but it still made me feel strange, people kneeling at my feet. An equally familiar voice came from behind the mask of the first kneeling figure. "Your Majesty... Your Highness... greetings." Gabrielle bid the warriors rise and all three removed their masks. We knew their leader, young Tarazon, who had turned into a fine warrior. She was now a watch commander, but she didn't look at all well. "Tarazon, are you ill?" Gabrielle questioned before I could ask the same question. "As well as can be expected your majesty. There seems to be a fever of some sort going around the village, there are many women a lot worse off than I am." The young Amazon answered. "What kind of a fever?" Gabrielle and I asked in unison. I know we were
both thinking about her dream. "I don't think Sartori knows," the young warrior answered. "It seems to have hit some of the women quite hard. The Queen Regent has erected tents to be used as infirmaries within the compound. Can I escort you to your quarters Your Majesty?" "No, that's not necessary Tarazon, but I am ordering you back to the village with us." Gabrielle answered. "But, Queen Gabr--" "Gabrielle is right, Tarazon, you look as though you're none too steady on your feet and the trees are no place for you in that kind of condition." I interrupted. "Yes, Your Highness." The Amazon answered. I groaned under my breath, I'll never get used to someone using that title. The young Commander gave instructions to the other warriors and left with us to head into the village. Gabrielle was quiet all of a sudden and I knew she was thinking about the visions in her dream. I hate to admit it, but it was on my mind too, the fact that Gabrielle's dream seemed to have some basis in fact. Tarazon answered our questions, but the girl just didn't seem like herself. I suspected that perhaps she felt worse than she was letting on. That suspicion was confirmed as we walked into the village. Ephiny was in the center of the village directing the construction of what seemed a small building. Just as she saw us and began walking in our direction, Tarazon's knees buckled underneath her. I caught the young woman before she hit the ground. The Regent ran the rest of the way and felt the young warrior's face. I'm sure she felt the same thing as I did. The heat coming from the girl's body was definitely a massive fever. "Bring her into the tent over by Sartori's hut," Ephiny asked. I lifted the young woman into my arms and carried her into the tent. Placing
her on the nearest pallet, I looked around at the tent and saw that it was almost filled to capacity. "Greetings Your Highness, Queen Gabrielle." Sartori acknowledged both of us as she began removing Tarazon's armor and stripped the girl down to her shift, placing a cold compress on her forehead. "Sartori, what in Tartaurus is going on here?" Gabrielle asked in a voice filled with concern and tinged with a bit of fear. Sartori washed her hands and stood before us once more. The healer was about my age, maybe a summer or two younger, but it was obvious she was bone tired. She looked much older than her years and I could see part of her pain was the frustration over her inability to fight this disease. Ephiny answered for the healer. "It started about a moon ago, Gabrielle. Nothing the healers have tried has worked. It seems to start like an ordinary summer fever, but it lingers. The women who caught the fever first are starting to get very bad," The Regent lowered her voice to just above a whisper. "Their weakened condition simply won't allow their bodies to fight off whatever infection has taken hold." "I'm sorry, My Queen, but no medicine I come up with seems to help." Sartori said in defeat. "Tori..." Adia, the healer's bondmate came into the tent and placed her hands gently on her partner's shoulders. "Gabrielle... Xena," Adia smiled at the newcomers. The tall healer never stood on ceremony with the two women. "Tori, you're about ready to fall down, you need to get some rest, love." Adia said softly. "There aren't enough hands, I can't leave right now." Sartori answered her lover. "There are now," Gabrielle spoke up. "Sartori, you do look like you're
about to drop. I want you to go get some sleep, that's an order," Gabrielle said emphatically as the Healer was about to protest. Sartori closed her mouth again, unwilling to argue with her Queen. "Come, on love." Adia said. "I'll stay here and help as I can. "I don't have too bad of a bedside manner, I can help." I heard my own voice saying. I looked over at Gabrielle and I saw the fear in her face, but she said nothing. "I'll stay and help too, now go on Sartori. We need you to stay healthy." Gabrielle added. "Xe?" Gabrielle questioned me as the others walked away to the task at hand. What could I say to my wife? That I neither took her dreams seriously nor feared catching the mysterious illness? That would have been a lie and I think she alone knew how I felt. To actually admit fear, wasn't in me, however, and I gently kissed her forehead. "I'll be careful," was the only promise I could think to make. Gabrielle could have ordered me to our quarters, Hades, she could have pleaded with those deep green eyes she has and I would have obeyed. My oath upon our Joining would not have allowed disobedience and if I was nothing else, I was a woman of my word. I knew though that my wife would never do that. Gabrielle would never embarrass me by making me look weak in the eyes of the warriors around us. She reached out and touched my face then brushed the hair away from my eyes. I saw her push down her own fear with that action. She was telling me that she would never ask me to give up being who I was. "I love you, Brie," I whispered. "Love you too, Warrior," she returned just before she turned to make her
way across the tent. I made my first stop next door to Sartori's hut. I gathered up a few herbs that perhaps the Healer hadn't thought to try yet and brought them into a corner of the tent to work. I watched from across the tent as Gabrielle donned an apron and spoke with some of the women lying on the pallets. I removed my weapons and armor and put on a similar apron, but could immediately feel a change in the atmosphere of the tent. The young women, who were sick and weak, smiled as their Queen, sat beside them offering them sips of cool water, holding their hands or just offering a few words of encouragement. "She really shouldn't be in here, Xena." Ephiny whispered to me looking in Gabrielle's direction. "If this is some kind of mystery illness, we don't need our Queen succumbing to it." I stopped to watch my wife as she paused next to every woman lying on a pallet, if only to give a look and a smile to each Amazon. Her very touch became healing to these women, for that was Gabrielle's nature. "I can't ask her to be less than she is, Eph." I responded to the Regent. * * *
The sun had been down for hours when Sartori walked into the tent looking refreshed from her hours of sleep. Her look changed to one of sheer joy when we told her that the two worst cases had been able to swallow a bit of the medicine I prepared. It held their fever in check for the last few hours at least and Sartori thanked me profusely. I explained that I was no Healer, not of her caliber anyway, but I picked up a few things here and there in my travels. Sartori also brought with her a new wave of helpers and I was finally able to pull Gabrielle away to our hut. I had a young girl from the food hut send
some dinner to our quarters and steered my wife in the direction of the baths. Once we'd steamed the ache in our muscles loose, we made out way to the hut for some much welcome food and privacy. Gabrielle uncharacteristically pushed her half-full plate away from her, leaning back and stretching her back. I looked up at her with concern. When my wife didn't eat good food, there was definitely something to worry about. I gave her that questioning look of mine and she smiled tiredly. "I feel fine... I think I'm just too tired to eat." She yawned. I watched as she stretched again, but she winced in pain this time. "Hey, come over here," I stood and walked over to our bed. "Take off your robe," I commanded and she complied quickly. I gazed at her body and even though my spirit was more than willing to pleasure the young Queen, my body was just too damned tired. "Lay down on your stomach." Gabrielle stretched out on our bed and when I sat down next to her with a jar of scented oil she finally realized what I had in mind and smiled contentedly. I warmed the oil in the palms of my hands and began to massage the stiff muscles of my wife's shoulders and back. I worked the knots and tension loose and before I had barely begun, Gabrielle's purrs of satisfaction had changed to a heavy breathing that told me she was sound asleep. I tossed my own robe on the chair beside the bed and wrapped my body around Gabrielle's. She unconsciously pressed her back further into my chest and I held her close, enjoying the feeling of her body against mine. Exhaustion finally claimed me and I fell into the deep, dreamless embrace of Morpheus. * * *
Both of us bolted upright at the pounding on the hut's door. "Gods, I feel like we just went to sleep." Gabrielle muttered sleepily.
"We did," I answered, noticing the moon was still high in the sky. I threw on my robe and Gabrielle did likewise before I opened the door. It was Medra, Sartori's apprentice healer. The young woman looked as tired as Sartori had earlier and there was an expression like panic in her eyes. "Forgive the intrusion, your Highness, but one of the women has taken a turn for the worse and Sartori asked if the Queen would come?" "Of course, Medra, tell Sartori that I'm on my way." Gabrielle rose to stand beside me. When the young Amazon left to deliver the message, Gabrielle immediately started dressing, and I followed suit. "Xe, you don't have to come." Gabrielle said and I knew what she was thinking, because she refused to let her eyes meet mine. "Brie, let's not let fear get the best of us, allright?" I returned. I wanted Gabrielle to know that I refused to live my life according to an oracle's prediction, even if that oracle happened to be my wife. "I just..." she began. "I know, love... I know." I replied, placing a cloak over her shoulders and laying a gentle kiss on the top of her head before we stepped out into the cool night air. Gabrielle sat on the edge of the pallet, close to the dying woman. I recognized the young Amazon as one of Gabrielle's Royal Guard although I couldn't recall her name. It's strange the things we remember at times, but I suddenly recalled that on one occasion she walked into the room as Gabrielle and I were in the middle of a rather amorous embrace. The young Guard turned about ten shades of scarlet once she realized where my hand was, yet vainly attempted to deliver her message. The few times I ran into her after that incident, proved to be rather traumatic for her. She seemed unable to look at Gabrielle or I without becoming absolutely
tongue-tied. Now, I watched as Gabrielle cried very real tears as the young Guard held on to her Queen for some sort of strength. There were a number of us gathered there and we could only watch as Gabrielle began to speak to the young woman. "Don't be afraid, Kiza." Gabrielle said, not much above a whisper. "Passing over is just another adventure for an Amazon as brave as you. I've been to the Amazon Land of the Dead, have I ever told you that?" I watched and felt no shame as the tears fell from my own eyes. Gods, how my wife could take this young woman's death and turn it into a glorious ballad for the young Amazon. I knew, deep down, Gabrielle would prefer not to be in this situation. Sometimes her heart is too tender to lose those she loves, and she does indeed love all her sisters. You would never have known that she was shivering and crying on the inside, though. She put herself into her bard mode and her voice held a strength and compassion that caused the ill woman to open her eyes and fix them on her Queen. Gabrielle told her of the wonder of the castle within the Great Mountains of the Amazon lands and of the brave and mighty women that would be there to greet her with open arms. My own heart tightened a bit as I recalled the memory of standing in front of that mountain, the cold wind blowing in my face. I remember thinking I would never see my Gabrielle again, choosing to fight Alti and help the Northern Amazons that I had wronged when I was so much younger. I knew at the time that it would be what Gabrielle would have wanted me to do and that's what got me through. I wondered at the time if I would ever see my heart again and I don't think I'll ever be able to express the feelings I had when I came across Gabrielle that day. I was tracking Hope, the realization that the young bard I loved, but never told that fact, was gone from me forever, caused an ache deep in my soul that nothing in life could ease. I was determined this time. Without Gabrielle there was no sense in living and if Dahok's spawn was alive, I knew I would kill her and suffer the consequences the fates would throw at me.
When I charged upon her, the forest became deathly silent. I swung my sword up and looked into that face. I knew it would be hard to do, kill the monster that wore Gabrielle's face, but I wasn't prepared for that look. It took only a fraction of a second to realize that my heart never pounded that hard unless Gabrielle, the real Gabrielle focused those deep green eyes in my direction. When she spoke my name... Gods, there was never a sweeter sound, was there? When I finally broke from my reverie, the sound of weeping filled the Healer's hut where they'd brought the young Amazon. I looked down and watched as Gabrielle took the oils that Ephiny offered her and anointed young Kiza. A sheer length of gauze was put in place to cover her face and Gabrielle stood to let the young woman's family come closer. I came up behind Gabrielle and she leaned back instinctively, feeling my presence behind her. She didn't turn into my embrace, but I could feel her shoulders shaking as she wept for the young Amazon. Even though it was the middle of the night, we started our day. Those who where physically able, helped with the sick and did everything from caring for the patients to boiling cloths and sheets, burning furs and clothing, anything that might be blamed for the infection. We were running out of options and even the medicine I had concocted the previous day, no longer worked. It was as if the sickness was fought back momentarily, but then it realized what the medicine was and came up with a way to fight it. The fact disturbed me, the idea that we might be fighting an entity of some sort as opposed to a random disease. Another disturbing fact I mentioned to Adia, pulling her outside of the tent so no one would hear me. "Adia, have you noticed there are no older patients?" I asked "And none under the age of puberty." She answered. So, it wasn't just me, someone else noticed it too.
"Okay, I'm not about to tell a Healer her job, but don't you find that odd? I mean, children and the elderly are the first casualties when it comes to the ravages of an illness. Every woman in these tents is a strong warrior of child bearing age." I explained. "I know, Xena. I don't think anyone else has stopped to think about it, but it makes me feel that this is no desultory illness. Do you have any idea at all how we go about finding out what this could be? Could it be a curse of some sort?" Adia turned and I could see the concern burning in her gaze. A concern, not only for her people, but for her own lover as well. I also saw a keen understanding of what we could be fighting against should this illness be more along the lines of magic rather than a natural sickness of the body. Adia was a mind healer, a woman accustomed to dealing in a person's dreamscape and fantasies. I knew that she could comprehend better than most the concept of fighting black magic, battling on a level other than the physical. "I suppose all we can do for the time being is continue to come up with new ways to combat the fever, that seems to be what's taking the fight out of them the quickest. I must know fifty different mixtures to stave off a fever, I'm sure Sartori knows more. I think what's slowing us down is the fact that we keep giving them the medicine even though it's stopped working. You think Sartori would be up for an experiment?" I asked. "I think she'll try just about anything at this point." Adia answered. "Let's try this," I explained leading her in the direction of Sartori's hut. "We make up a new mixture everyday. If the body doesn't have time to get used to it, we may be able to keep the fever at bay a little longer. Nobody gets the same mixture twice." We walked into Sartori's hut just as Gabrielle was placing a sheet of gauze across a young Amazon's face. This had been the second woman to contract the illness. Now, it was obvious that the progression of the disease was rapid. It took only a little more than one moon for it to claim it's first two victims.
After the family left the hut, Adia and I collected the herbs we would need and quickly made our way out. "Xena," Gabrielle called and I handed the items in my hand to Adia before I turned, knowing that the time for a confrontation had come between my wife and I. "Yes, my heart?" I answered sincerely as I moved closer. "Xe, I don't want you helping in the tents anymore." Gabrielle said tightly, lowering her voice so that only I could hear. "Gab-ri-elle," I responded slowly. Tears suddenly sprung to my wife's eyes. "Women are dying, Xena, this is a serious situation and in my dream--" That's when she broke down and I moved to wrap my arms around her. I lifted her chin slightly so that I could see her face. She had dark circles under her eyes and I knew she must be utterly drained, the exhaustion only feeding her fear. "Oh, Brie, I know you would like to see me safe and sound just like I always want you to be out of harm's way. I may not be Amazon, but in a way, these women are my people too. They've come to mean a great deal to me and I can't just desert them to save my own life." I held her closer and tenderly kissed her temple, feeling her tears wet my shoulder I leaned closer to her ear and whispered. "Brie, is this what you would have me do? Because you know that if you make it a command, I will follow it." Gabrielle was silent for a moment and I gave her time to process what I said. I could still feel her wet tears on my shoulder, and then I felt the warmth of her lips as they pressed themselves against the skin there.
"No," she whispered back, "I can't ask that of you, Xe. You wouldn't ask it of me, would you?" The inflection of her voice led me to believe that she already knew the answer to that question. "Gods, I would want to, my heart. I would want to so badly, but I could never ask you to stop being who you are." My wife smiled up at me through her tears and my heart leapt into my throat and broke at the same instant. The two of us came to a precipice that few couples ever have to look over. We were at a point where our own lives and the precious love we held for one another became secondary to the needs of our people. "Then we'll just have to trust that Artemis will protect us." My wife stated. I reached down and pressed my lips firmly to hers, not wanting the sensation to end. Gods, how the woman has grown in these past five summers. When we are alone and away from all responsibility she turns into the young girl from Potidaea, so carefree and full of adventure and fun. Now, she was the woman I married, all grown up and making grown up decisions. Today she was the Amazon Queen. We kissed once more and unwillingly pushed away from one another. We each breathed deeply, tucking our affection into a safe spot until we could be alone together later. We entered the tent and Gabrielle squeezed my hand to go off toward the pallets. I refused to release the small hand, pulling it up to my lips instead. I placed a light kiss in her palm and let go. She smiled again and it was as if a piece of the sun came down to touch me. I worked in a corner of the tent with Adia after we told Sartori of our plan. The Healer agreed wholeheartedly with our strategy at reducing the fever with varying herbal mixtures. I looked up occasionally to spot Gabrielle. She looked exhausted, but the ill women lying around her saw only their
Queen's loving smile. I absently reached a hand up to touch my own face, relieved to have the skin feel cool. I certainly hadn't discounted my wife's dreams and tried to push the thought away. I wouldn't live my life in fear; that much was a certainty, but I couldn't dispel the images Gabrielle saw in her dream. Perhaps if we weren't both concentrating so intently on protecting me, we would have noticed the flush to Gabrielle's cheeks and the nagging cough she suddenly developed. * * *
"You look like you're asleep on your feet." I said to Gabrielle. I came up to her and waved my hand in front of her face to bring her back from wherever she'd gone. "You don't look well, Brie." I said with more concern than I normally would have. "I'm just exhausted," she returned a small smile filled with fatigue. "Come on, you're going to bed." I said the words in such a way that even Gabrielle refused to argue with me. I was secretly glad she didn't because I was fully prepared to throw the woman over my shoulder if she had. The night air had a definite chill to it and even I shuddered when it first caressed my sweat soaked skin, goose bumps rising on my arms. Gabrielle lifted her hair and seemed to welcome the coolness, closing her eyes and standing still as a slight breeze swept across the village compound. I watched the small blonde at my side and suddenly her brow knit together and she appeared to be falling forward. She reached out her hand and I quickly caught her as she leaned heavily against me.
"Xe?" Gabrielle asked as if she didn't understand what was going on with her own body. I knew in an instant. All I had to do was feel her skin, a hot dry heat rising off of her. Gods, how could I have been so stupid? "Brie?" I questioned. I scooped her small body into my arms just as Medra was passing by us on her way into the infirmary. "Your Highness--" the young woman started. "Medra go inside and tell Sartori to come to the Queen's tent and bring a dose of the fever medicine we just mixed up." "Is the Queen--" "Now!" I hissed under my breath, turning and walking away to get Gabrielle inside our own quarters. Once inside I pulled the blankets off the bed until only a thin sheet remained. I removed Gabrielle's clothing down to her cotton shift and poured some water from a pitcher on the table into a nearby bowl. I soaked some cloths in the cool water and began sponging off her heated skin. "Oh, Gabrielle." I murmured aloud, waiting impatiently for Sartori to arrive. * * *
I knew it was the Healer because there was a hurried knock on the door and then it opened. No one in the village would come in unannounced except a Healer whose only focus was on her Queen. Sartori kneeled down next to the bed and placed a hand on Gabrielle's face, grimacing at the warmth rising from the small Queen's skin.
"No, no..." Sartori muttered. "Did you bring the medicine?" I asked. There was little I could do for my own wife that we hadn't already tried on the other women, but I would be damned if I was going to let her go without one Tartaurus of a fight. Sartori nodded and handed me the mug from her hand. I sat on the bed and pulled Gabrielle to me so that she was secure against my body, her weight upon my chest. "Brie," I whispered gently. "Come on, sweetheart... you need to wake up for me." Gabrielle's eyes fluttered open and she seemed lost for a few heartbeats until her eyes focused and took in Sartori and the fact that she was wrapped in my arms. "You need to swallow some of this, Brie," I said as I held the cup to her lips. She groaned at the taste and I'd forgotten that I used to lace medicinal herbs with honey for my wife. She would literally cover her head with a blanket when she was sick and I would offer her a cure. She realized that this was not one of those simple headache remedies, it was far more serious, and so she took a small sip. "More than that, Brie... come on, take a big swallow." She did as she was directed and I handed the cup back to Sartori, placing a small kiss on Gabrielle's temple. "This wasn't in my dream," Gabrielle looked up at me and said dryly. I couldn't help smiling, but it was bittersweet in its release. I explained to Sartori's questioning gaze the dream Gabrielle had that it would be I who was ill. I held my wife tighter and knew she would have her sense of humor as long as she had her strength. Then she surprised me with her next words; they were not ones I was prepared to hear.
"Ephiny... I have to give Ephiny my right of caste." She said weakly. "No, not yet." I replied vehemently. "Xe..." Gabrielle responded and I knew she didn't have the strength to argue with me. Although I shouldn't have, I took advantage of that fact. "There will be time for that later if it's necessary." I told her, wiping a cool cloth across her face. Gabrielle nodded her assent and relaxed back into my arms. I could see that Sartori felt entirely helpless. It was her job to keep the Queen healthy and I'm sure that she thought she failed Gabrielle in some way. I observed the same emotions playing across the Healer's face as my own. I could easily guess what she was thinking. No matter what Gabrielle thought, no mater the amount of protest, she was the Queen and we should not have allowed her to be in those tents. I cursed myself now, but it was hindsight. I was the Queen's Champion and I let her walk right into the danger. "Sartori," I whispered as Gabrielle began to nod off again, "would you have someone bring me the baskets of plants and herbs that I gathered this afternoon. I'll make tomorrow's dose for the fever, but I'm not going to leave Gabrielle. I can do it just as easily from here." The healer nodded and without saying anything more she walked out of the hut. I must have fallen asleep because when I opened my eyes and looked out the window by the bed, the moon was low on the other side of the sky. My body was so tired I might have slept through until dawn, but it was the small body next to mine that awoke me. Gabrielle lay curled tightly against me, the heat pouring off her in waves, her body shivering uncontrollably. I extricated myself from the tiny figure and grabbed a mug of water. I pulled my leathers off until I was clad only in my shift and moved to lay back down with my wife. Gabrielle opened her eyes and her teeth chattered as if there were snow on the ground all
around her. "Here, baby... drink some water... come on, just a little more, good girl." "Xena, can't I have a blanket? I'm so cold." She pleaded and it tore at my heart. "No, sweetheart, it will only make your fever worse. Come here and lay against me, I'll keep you warm." I lay down on the bed and allowed Gabrielle to wrap the thin sheet around her and pulled her body close to mine. Gods, the heat coming off her was stifling and began to make me sweat, but she continued to shiver and shake and so I rubbed my hands along her skin to see if I couldn't relax her enough into falling back asleep. If I could just get her fever down so she could sleep, her body might retain enough strength to fight off the infection. I don't know if the fever abated somewhat or if my wife's exhausted body finally gave up working it's tired muscles, but some time later she was still and I could hear her deep, even breathing. I felt her skin and realized that the fever was as strong as ever. Her body fell into an exhausted slumber despite the illness. I slipped from her embrace and sat at the table in the middle of our hut. Medra brought over all the herbs I was working with and I began on a new mixture for tomorrow, which was only a short time away. My mind ran through the different possibilities regarding the strange illness. The fever appeared to affect only Amazons. Apart from myself, there were few non-Amazon women in the village, who hadn't contracted it. What was even more puzzling was the fact that only young, healthy women were contracting the disease. It was breaking every traditional rule that I could think of. There were a number of Amazons who hadn't contracted any symptoms at all, probably due to some natural immunity. If this wasn't just a random illness, then who could have the power to kill off an entire race of people? The Amazon's were the chosen people of the Goddess Artemis, Apollo's twin sister. If this were the doing of another God, then why would
Artemis be allowing it to happen? More importantly, why doesn't Apollo do something to save his daughter? I could only think of questions in my mind as I crushed the leaves with a mortar and pestle. I was coming to no conclusions and never having been one to shy away from confrontations with Greek Gods, I decided I would walk to Artemis' temple when the sun came up in the morning and get some answers for myself. * * *
"Artemis! Get your scrawny butt down here!" I shouted for the third time. The priestess' scurried through the temple on my arrival and my belligerent attitude and shouting at the top of my lungs, certainly wasn't the way to endear myself to them. I finally stalked from the claustrophobic silence of the temple, nearly running down Ephiny in the process. The look in her eye told me more than enough. "How long have you known that Artemis has deserted the temple?" I asked, sorry for the accusatory tone, but unable to keep it from my voice. "Just after the fever started. The high priestess came to me." The Regent answered, lowering her head slightly. "Xena, I didn't want the women to lose heart. If they know their Goddess has deserted them they'll give up hope." I turned away abruptly and began walking toward the Queen's hut. I don't know if I'd have done things differently from the way Ephiny handled it, but I was angry and I needed to take it out on someone. "Xena, my people are dying." She tossed at my back. "My wife is dying!" I turned back around to face her, my fists clenched together tightly so I wouldn't lose my temper completely and start
something that wouldn't help anyone in the long run. I paused and took a deep breath, turning my eyes skyward to push back the tears that statement caused. "At least we have our confirmation that this just isn't some random infectious fever. Come on, Eph. Maybe Gabrielle can call up Apollo and we can find out what's going on." I said. I waited for the Regent to catch up with me and we walked down the winding path back to the village. We were rather silent companions; each of us caught up in our own worries of what we stood to lose. * * *
"What's wrong?" I asked, not sure if I wanted to know the answer when I burst through the door of our hut. Medra was outside crying and silent eyes followed the Regent and I into the building. I left Gabrielle in Sartori's care earlier, but the Healer only looked at me with a pain in her eyes that betrayed her own fear. "I can't get Gabrielle to respond any longer." Sartori answered ominously. I wasn't willing to believe this latest bit of news. I just looked at the faces of the women in the room and rushed to my wife's bed. "Brie... come on, honey, wake up." I prodded the small figure that lay there, looking rather tiny in the large bed we had made to fit my warrior's physique. I stoked her face, only to feel the fever still ravaging her body. Running my hands gently through her golden hair, I didn't know what else to do. She was the only thing that kept me together in a chaotic world that had a tendency to go mad every once in a while and I just didn't know what to do.
I am a warrior and I could not see the enemy that I needed to fight in order to protect my wife's life. "Xena?" I felt Ephiny's hand on my shoulder, but didn't turn around. "This makes sense if this is a spell to curse the Amazons. Gabrielle is our Queen, she would be affected the most and for the longest time since she represents all of Amazonia." "A curse against the Amazons?" Sartori looked astounded. Suddenly the Healer nodded her head. "Yes... it fits doesn't it? Xena, who would have the power to do such a thing?" I just shook my head, never releasing the small blonde lying in the bed from my gaze. "We need to discuss this with the council." Ephiny began. "There must be something that can be done. Sartori, how many members of the council are unaffected by the sickness?" "There's you, Adia, and three or four of the older council members. Elda has sat on the council the longest, but she is very loyal to the Queen," the Healer added. "Xena... Xena..." Ephiny said. I could hear the Regent talking, but I wasn't really paying attention. All my thoughts and cares were wrapped around Gabrielle's well being. "Xena, we're going to need your help, my friend." The Regent said again and I knew she was right. Out of everyone involved I had the most dealings with Gods and their curses, even though most of my interactions had been forced on me. I realized, as I sat staring at my wife's still form, that finding the reason behind and putting a stop to the cause of the fever would be the only way I could save Gabrielle. I turned finally to look up at the Regent. "I need to talk to Adia before we meet with the council. I think I have an
idea about how we can find out what's going on." I made my way out to the woods where I knew I would be alone. I didn't want any of the others to see the confrontation I was going to have. "Ares." I snarled the name aloud and my face broke into a sneer as I spoke the word. I couldn't help it, my distaste for the God of War was no secret and he tried to trick and betray me into fighting at his side on more than one occasion. Usually the God showed up within a heartbeat of me calling his name, but not this time. I paced until I grew tired of the waiting. I had just about given up, turning back toward the village when I felt his presence. I turned around and there he stood, looking odd in full battle armor, dirt and grime streaked across his arms. "This better be good, Xena, I'm kind of in the middle of something here." The God of War said testily. "What's going on, Ares... where's Artemis and why are the Amazons dying? I know one of you is at the bottom of this." "You know you're beautiful when you're angry." He said in that leering way of his. "Then you're about to see how drop-dead gorgeous I can be because if anything happens to Gabrielle--" I stopped my ranting in mid sentence as he cocked his head to the side and suddenly vanished. "Ares... Arrreeessss!" I screamed, letting my own frustration loose. I continued to scream until my throat was raw. I needed to let loose the anger that was building up and this seemed about as safe a way as any. I leaned my back against a tree and closed my eyes, refusing to let the tears fall. I knew once I started, I wouldn't be able to stop. Besides, I wasn't about
to admit defeat. It would take all the Gods on Olympus to separate me from Gabrielle. I wasn't about to let Hades have her just yet. I pushed myself away from the large olive tree and strode back to the village, a new determination in my heart. I had an idea, but now I had to see if Adia was as good a dreamscape Healer as I thought she was. * * *
"Xena, what you're asking..." Adia lowered her head, her voice trailing off into nothing. "It's the only way we can summon a God, Adia. Gabrielle is the only one who can call Apollo to her side with her ring, if I could, then I would. Ares made it sound like something is happening, but he left so quickly I couldn't learn anything from him. Something big is going down on Olympus, it's not like Ares to leave when he could stick around and gloat because of my pain over Gabrielle." "Xena, I've never entered the dreamscape of a person so physically ill before, I don't know what it will do." I think she caught the look on my face and she hurriedly went on. "I'm not worried for me... I fear for Gabrielle. Xena, what if my attempt does more harm than good. I don't know if I could live with myself knowing I caused injury to my Queen with these efforts." She finished softly. Once again I was taken back at the magnitude of love and loyalty Gabrielle's Amazons had for her. My wife earned every ounce of respect and adoration these women expressed and it surely didn't surprise me, but sometimes the enormity of it still astonished me. "Adia, I do understand what you're saying, more than you know. I only know that I won't be able to live with myself either if anything happens to
Gabrielle and I haven't tried everything within my power to prevent it." I didn't mean to cry, Gods I hardly ever cry in front of anyone besides Gabrielle, but the emotions of the day finally caught up to me and I could feel the tears sliding down my cheeks. It was good in a way because I saw a look in Adia's eye at my emotional display, one that I interpreted to mean she was reversing our positions in her mind. What if Sartori were the one ill. It's funny what you can see when you really look into someone's eyes. I saw the tall, dark-haired woman make a decision without saying a word. "Come on, the sooner the better." She said abruptly and I followed her, stride for stride to my wife's bedside. Once we were able to explain what we had in mind and Adia talked privately with her own wife, the dreamscape Healer asked us all to leave. I was more than a little nervous, but Adia reassured me that it might take hours in real time once she entered Gabrielle's dreamscape. She said that I could come back in and check on them at any time, once she was in a deep enough state to cross over to that other reality. I nodded, and not knowing what else to say, I squeezed the tall woman's hand and whispered a word of encouragement. She smiled that crooked smile of hers that told me my wife would be safe if she had anything to do with it. Just before I closed the door to the hut I saw the dark-haired woman seat herself crosslegged on the floor, her back against Gabrielle's bed. She closed her eyes and I pulled the door shut. I sat down on the top step of the stairs to the veranda. I was nervous and frightened and I didn't even attempt to hide the emotions that manifested themselves physically. I folded my hands together and pressed my knuckles to my lips, mumbling prayers to any God that would still listen to an old warrior. I could feel my body start to rock back and forth.
Hades, I haven't done this since I was a child, when the howling winds of the winter storms used to keep me awake at night. There was a tree outside my bedroom window, over the inn that my mother owned, that was struck by lightning long before I was born. The tree was bent at an odd angle and whipped against the wooden shutters when the winds grew
strong. The sound terrified my for one reason or another. I was four summers old and my mother would come in and snuggle against me in the warm blankets of my bed and rock me back and forth until I fell asleep again. The motion became a sort of comfort movement after that, but it was years since I'd relied on it to ease my frightened heart. I felt the weight as Ephiny sat down beside me on the step. The Regent placed her hand on my shoulder and for the first time today I realized I wasn't wearing my armor. Gods, this was a first. I forgot to put on something that was as much a part of me as my very skin. I remembered now that it was placed on the small stool beside the bed, my sword lying over it. "Adia will come through for us. She's smart and she knows her stuff." Ephiny said in the way of encouragement. I just nodded, unable to speak. "Xena... Gods, I know this sounds indelicate, but you know how I am. About Gabrielle's right of caste--" "That's my fault." I answered, quickly looking across at my friend. "I'm sorry, Eph, Gabrielle wanted to give you her right of caste when she first became sick, but I wouldn't let her." Ephiny looked up in surprise as I continued. "I thought... I thought if I could keep her from giving you her right of caste, that I could stop the inevitable. I'm sorry, I was being selfish. I wasn't thinking of the Amazons I was only thinking about myself and how much I don't want to lose Gabrielle." "Xena," Ephiny paused, waiting until my eyes met her own. "I can only hope that someday I find something and someone that will invoke those same feelings of love within me. It's easy for me to put aside my life and think only of the good of my people because I have no one in that way. I understand, my friend, and you have done nothing to feel guilty about." I allowed my well-trained veneer to slip aside just a bit for this woman who
had become a dear friend to my wife as well as myself. "The only real reason I bring any of this up, Xena, is because I thing we should all know what's expected of us no matter what happens." My face must have displayed the question in my mind as I gazed at the Regent. "If, Artemis forbid, anything should happen to Gabrielle, and she hasn't willed her right of caste to anyone, then the throne reverts to her rightful heir." "Gabrielle doesn't have any children, Eph, you know that." I responded. "Then it goes to her spouse, that would be you." The Regent finished. I just sat there in silence. I didn't want to think about this possible scenario, but I couldn't be a good warrior unless I examined every venue, so I nodded and accepted by responsibility as Gabrielle's Consort. "You know if it came to that, Eph, I would turn the crown over to you." I stated simply. Ephiny remained silent, not moving for a few long moments. Finally she cleared her throat and when she spoke I knew it was from her heart. "I can understand why you would want to do that, Xena, but remember to think about what Gabrielle would want for you." "I just don't think I could do it, Eph," and I felt my voice break slightly. "If anything does happen to Gabrielle, I don't think I could stay here, there would be too much pain in everything I would see everyday." The Regent nodded, but continued on. "I can understand that, but there are people here who could make it easier to bear. The women of this village love you, Xena." I smirked at her and she grinned just a bit. "Okay, you don't have that open,
accepting exterior that Gabrielle does, but it doesn't mean the women feel anything less. We are warriors too, my friend, and there isn't a woman in this village that doesn't understand that you and Gabrielle are simply two sides of the same coin. Besides, you still have a promise to keep to your wife, don't you?" I didn't have to ask her what promise. It was the one vow I was determined not to break, whether I could help it or not. It was a few summers ago that I made that promise to Gabrielle, when we considered ourselves only best friends and I hadn't yet confessed my love for her. I promised that no matter what happened, in life or death, to my bard, I would not become the monster I was as the Destroyer of Nations. I extracted a promise from the Queen Regent that if it looked as if I would ever break my vow to Gabrielle, that Ephiny should strike me down with her blade before I could shame Gabrielle's name and my love for her. "It's just something I think you should think about Xena. I pray we never have to deal with that circumstance, but we both know that Gabrielle would want you somewhere that you could live your life in peace and happiness, not traveling alone with your pain. You always have somewhere that you belong, Xena... remember that." Ephiny finished. "That means more to me than you could possibly know, Eph." I answered and the tears that were becoming annoyingly familiar sprung to my eyes once again. I couldn't say it to Ephiny, but as I sat there awaiting word on Gabrielle's well being I knew that should anything ever happen to my beloved bard... happiness would never exist for me again. * * *
"I had a feeling you'd be here." Adia said as she stepped lightly upon the rock formation that Gabrielle sat on.
The young Queen looked tired, but she was surprisingly alert given the circumstances. When Adia entered Gabrielle's dreamscape in the Amazon village, the Healer had no idea where to look for the Queen. Then she remembered the first time they met. Gabrielle was sitting at this pond with Sartori on that sunny day. Gabrielle clasped the Healer's strong hands and she couldn't keep from wrapping her arms around the taller woman's waist and starting to cry. "Sshh, Gabrielle... it will be allright, you don't have to be afraid." Adia murmured, just as she always did to calm her own wife. "Xena sent me after you... she said something about not being able to find where you put anything so you have to get better." Gabrielle laughed and started to cry at the same time, but Adia knew the small jest relieved the young blonde somewhat. "Come on, let's sit over here and talk about what's going on." Adia sat and seated Gabrielle on a fallen log, realizing the young Queen leaned on her as if for support. "I'm getting weaker every moment. That's not normal... shouldn't I be healthy in my dreams?" Gabrielle asked. "Gabrielle, Xena thinks that this fever has something to do with the Gods, it's not just any random illness. Artemis deserted her temple; even the high priestess can't summon her. Your warrior also thinks the other Gods are involved. We need you to try to call your father into your dreamscape. We need to know how to fight whatever this is." "Can I do that, Adia... summon Apollo into my dreams?" "It's certainly worth a try... we're running out of ideas back there." Adia added softly.
"This was in my dream, Adia." Gabrielle sounded like she was almost musing aloud. Noticing the Healer's confused explanation, she hurried on to explain. "I had a dream I told, Xena about, only in it I thought she was sick because I couldn't make her understand me, although I kept trying to reach her. The truth is I can hear everything that everyone is saying around me. It's so strange, like floating outside of myself, but I can't seem to wake my body up." Gabrielle's tears began to fall at the frustration she felt and once again, the tall Healer embraced the small Queen. "It's allright, Gabrielle, I'll tell Xena that. It will do her heart good to know that you can hear her." Adia brushed away the young woman's tears. "Gabrielle, we need to see if we can rouse Apollo, do you feel strong enough for this?" Gabrielle nodded. "Try to concentrate on the fact that you're in a dream. You want Apollo to know exactly where you are... not in the Amazon village, but in your dreamscape. Ready?" Gabrielle nodded again and closed her eyes. Xena taught her well and she immediately began to meditate, concentrating on everything Adia explained to her. After a few moments that seemed like candlemarks to the Healer, Gabrielle touched the band on the finger of her right hand. "Father..." The young Queen said aloud. The young Queen opened her eyes, but unlike the previous occasions she called upon her father, this time Apollo did not appear. Long moments passed and Gabrielle closed her eyes tightly, imagining her dreamscape and concentrating on every detail.
"It's not working, Adia." Gabrielle opened her eyes in frustration. "Give it time, Gabrielle," the Healer replied. Adia took one of Gabrielle's hands in both of her own, trying to infuse a little strength into her ailing Queen. Finally a small shimmering line, almost a tear in the fabric of the air appeared. Materializing in all his godly splendor was Gabrielle's father, Apollo. His golden armor, usually polished to a high sheen, was scuffed and dirty. It was obvious the God fought in a battle, and one against other Gods, for him to look so disheveled. There was something that overrode the God's own dealings, however, and that was evident by the concern etched in the lines of the usually happy face. It was concern for his daughter. "Gabrielle." Apollo said sharply as he moved to his daughter's side. Apollo understood the situation the moment he realized that Gabrielle called to him from her dreamscape. In an instant he felt the gravity of the situation. If he didn't know what he and his siblings were fighting for, then he certainly recognized it now. Why hadn't it occurred to him that if his sister's Amazons died, their Queen would too? Gabrielle intended to be strong in front of her father, but the sickness and her worry over Xena, the tragedy of the whole business came crashing around her and she sobbed as the handsome God knelt and held his daughter's weakened body. "Gabrielle, my child... we'll get through this. I won't let anything happen to you." Apollo murmured to comfort his daughter, knowing that it might not be the truth. "They're dying... all my people are dying... I think I'm going to die too." Gabrielle said through her tears. Apollo quieted the young woman even as his head began to formulate a plan. He knew it would take someone of exceptional abilities to attempt
what he had in mind. "Gabrielle, is Xena in the Amazon village with you?" Gabrielle nodded. I believe I have a way that we can defeat this, but you'll have to trust me for a while. I have to go, very quickly back to Olympus, but I'll return in the morning. I want to talk to your warrior, then I explain what's going on to Xena and I'll come back to your dreamscape too." "You don't have to, father, I can hear everything that goes on out there." Gabrielle assured him. "Gabrielle, I'm going to put a circle of protection around you. I can't heal you, but my protection will prevent you from getting any worse." "Please," Gabrielle placed her hand on the God's arm. "Not just me, father... all of the women here?" Even though time was a rapidly fleeing commodity, Apollo took the time to smile gently at his daughter. Her concern was always for others and it endeared her even more to the ancient God. Apollo nodded his head and stood. Clapping his hands together once, he rubbed the palms until a glowing ball of light emerged in his hand. He tossed the light high into the air and it fell in tiny tendrils, the long trails of light forming a canopy over the Amazon village. Apollo bent once more and brushed his lips lightly to his daughter's forehead. "I have to leave, Gabrielle, but I'll return to speak with Xena in the morning. Don't give up hope, my child." He whispered and suddenly there were only multi colored sparkles in the air where he stood. I stood even as Ephiny rose beside me. Candlemarks passed as we sat
on the steps of the Queen's hut. I didn't dare leave in case Adia should wake with good news and the Regent, ever the concerned friend, waited next to me. Now, we both stood staring at the evening sky as tendrils of light fell all around the village. I remembered seeing something called sky rockets when I was in Chin that were made with the black powder and these lights looked much the same, only these didn't fade into the blackness of the sky. The branches of light that covered the village sparkled and pulsed as if they were alive in some way. "I don't know what it is, but it doesn't feel bad." Ephiny stated simply and I had to agree with her. It was another candlemark or so before Adia awoke. She was understandably exhausted, but gave me an update before she dropped her body down onto the extra cot in the hut. "First of all," the Healer looked up with a tired grin, "Gabrielle says to tell you that she loves you." I found myself grinning with tears springing to my eyes all at once. More tears, Hades, I have to stop this, it's getting to be a habit. "The interesting thing is that she can hear us... hear everything that's going on around her. We can talk to her and she'll hear us. She was able to summon Apollo," the Healer added with a yawn. "He placed a spell of protection over the entire village. No one will get any worse, but he can't heal them either. He said he'd be here in the morning to talk to you, Xena. He sounded like he had a plan of some sort." Sartori seated herself next to Adia and listened to what her wife had to say. "You know, Xena, Apollo looked a little... well, beat up. He was in full armor, but he looked like he'd been fighting." Adia commented before she yawned again. "I know what you mean," I answered the Healer. "Ares looked the same way when I saw him."
"Well, we've been reprieved... for a while anyway." Ephiny said. "Yea, I guess there isn't much more we can do until morning." I responded. "Adia, thank you." It sounded rather weak to my own ears. Here, the Healer risked her own physical well being for my wife and the best I could come up with was thank you. The dark-haired woman understood, however and gave me a wry smile. "Lets get you to your hut so you can get some rest." I said aloud. "Sartori and I can do it," Ephiny responded. "You stay with Gabrielle." When I closed the door to the hut behind the three women, I was suddenly glad to be alone with Gabrielle. Even though our conversation would be a little one sided, it thrilled my heart just to know that she was aware... of me, of our love... that there was still time to say the things I wanted her to hear. I slipped on a cotton shift and got into bed with my wife as I have done for a long time now. I pulled her against my chest and wrapped my arms around her. Her skin didn't feel as hot and I figured that was Apollo's doing. "I gotta tell ya, hon... this warrior's bones must be getting old because this bed sure does feel good at the end of the day. Remember when we first stayed in the Amazon village, when you accepted Terreis' right of caste? Remember how I could hardly sleep until I laid a blanket on the floor?" I chuckled to myself at that memory. I was so accustomed to the hard ground that a soft pallet felt unnatural. I remember my wife felt like she was in Ellysia when she laid her body down on the soft, feather stuffed mattress. Of course, Gabrielle wasn't my wife back then. I gently kissed her temple and realized that was one of the memories I wanted to share with her. "Gabrielle, do you remember when you met the Amazons and became their Princess?" I asked aloud. "Did you know that I was in love with you back then? Gods, I know I didn't show it, but I was sure it was just because
you were so young and innocent and you looked up to me. I talked myself out of it every chance I got because I knew the last thing an innocent girl like you needed was a warrior like me in your life. I ended up hurting your feelings half the time with all of my quirky ways. I guess the other reason I never told you was that I never thought a young, intelligent, beautiful girl like you could ever love someone like me." I brushed the hair off her face and realized that if I was going to bare my soul here I might as well go all the way. I mean how many times would I have to talk to Gabrielle without her being able to get a word in edgewise. "You know why they put both of us in the same hut when we stayed with the Amazons? Melosa thought you were my body slave. I know I should have said something right then and there, but it seemed kind of convenient, ya know? You were so damned cute in those new leathers and I needed a way to keep those Amazons away from you. Well, most of them were terrified of me anyway so it worked out pretty well." I smiled to myself because I knew that wherever Gabrielle was right now, her eyes were about to get as big as full moons. "Melosa was pretty taken with you, too. I think she was the first to guess that you meant a lot more to me than I let on. She asked to... uhm, well, let's say... borrow you for an evening. I had to explain to her that I don't share my property well. She caught me watching you on the practice field with Eponin one afternoon; as usual I couldn't take my eyes off of you. She told me I didn't have to lie; I could have just told her that I was in love with you. Everyone knew how we felt about each other but us, my heart. Why in the world did it take us so long?" I finished in a whisper. Finally, the candlemarks being awake caught up to me and I relaxed, holding Gabrielle in my arms, hearing her deep, even breathing. I felt the steady rise of her chest and the comforting feeling of all this took me gently into Morpheus' realm. * * *
I felt the odd sensation before I was fully awake; perhaps that added to my confusion. I jumped from the bed clad only in my shift, grabbing my sword in one swift move. Hades materialized at the foot of the bed and a fear like I've never known clutched at my heart. I knew only one thing in this terrifying moment, and that was that I had no intention of giving Gabrielle to him. "You can't have her." I hissed, raising my sword in what I hoped was a menacing manner, even though I knew it was futile to threaten the God of the Underworld. Hades' brow knit together and his blue eyes looked confused. He didn't appear to be in a good humor and when he finally realized what I was talking about, he pushed my sword away in exasperation. "Take it easy, warrior, I don't want the girl any more than you want to give her up. Apollo said we were to meet here." Now it was I who was confused, that is until my senses went on overload and they started to materialize. Apollo was the next to show, followed by Ares, Athena, Aphrodite, and even Hermes. I met each of them at one time or another in my travels, but that didn't make me feel any less uncomfortable standing in the middle of my own hut, wearing only a thin cotton shift, and surrounded by half of the Olympian Gods. Apollo immediately walked over to the bed and knelt beside Gabrielle, while I grabbed my leathers and tugged at the laces behind my back. Once I was dressed and pulled my boots on I felt a little more like myself. Apollo rose and gently took my hand. Gabrielle's father surprised me by leaning closer and placing a soft kiss on my cheek, much to Ares' consternation. I greeted the tall God as my father in law and could see nothing but concern etched in his features. "Xena," he said and it was all I could do not to burst into tears right there... Gods, was I getting hormonal or what?
When I looked up they were all pretty much staring at their feet and, too late I realized that they were all Gods and had the ability to read my mind. This was gonna be a long meeting. "Apollo, what's going on?" I asked, focusing my attention on the one person here I felt I could trust. "I think you better give her the short version and speed this up, Apollo." Athena hastened her brother. "She has to know exactly what she's getting in to, what's expected of her." Apollo turned his head in Athena's direction. "Hey, I got an idea," I said testily, "how about talking directly to me instead of about me!" Athena lowered her head, but looked a little put out. She and I had kind of a long running thing going. It can only be described as adversdefault, yet in a non-violent way. She thought of herself as the ultimate female warrior and never liked the fact that most people thought I could kick her butt. I mean, she's a Goddess so that could never happen, but I think, deep down, she knew that if she didn't have the Godly powers... yea, I'd kick her butt. "Xena, it does tend to get complicated in spots, but the long and the short of it is that Hera is trying to destroy mankind again." "I thought since the little incident with Prometheus, Zeus had her under some kind of oath that said she agreed not to interfere directly with mankind?" I asked, knowing how the Gods could manipulate an oath to their own advantage. "That's just it," Ares interrupted, "she's not doing anything to hurt mankind directly." I looked back to Apollo for a less cryptic explanation. "Hera is out to destroy all of you through us." Apollo explained. "She's
declared war on the rest of Olympus, Xena, and as each God falls, so does the section of mankind that they patron. If she captures Ares," he nodded to his brother, "then warriors will fall. If Aphrodite is taken... lovers. Do you see? She's found the perfect way to destroy man, without spilling a drop of his blood herself." "Then I take it Artemis has already been taken." I said flatly. "Artemis was wounded, Xena" Apollo said, a pronounced wave of pain passing across his features. "She's dying." He finished and no one said a word, knowing that Apollo and his twin sister were like one entity. "Yes, Xena, there are ways that Gods can kill one another too." He added in answer to my look of surprise. "And, if Artemis dies..." I started, not really wanting to finish that line. "So do the Amazons... all of the Amazons." Aphrodite finished looking down at Gabrielle's still form. "So, what's this plan you've got?" I said shortly, not wanting to deal with the possibility of losing Gabrielle. "The Elixir of Life." Apollo answered. I paused to look up into his face. "I thought that was just a myth." "It's kept on the island of Delos." "Frankly, I thought Delos was a myth too." I replied. "Hardly, Xena, it's just well protected from human eyes. Delos is my birthplace and the Elixir is kept there, deep in the bowels of the island. One drop will cure mortal or God from any wound or sickness." "So why don't you just get it and heal your sister?" I asked, always the suspicious one. "First of all the protection placed around the Elixir won't allow any immortal
into the room where it's kept. Secondly, the minute one of us interferes directly, that gives Hera leave to do the same. I think you and I both know what kind of power she wields. She could destroy this entire world in a single day. If we simply help you to obtain the Elixir--" "You're playing by the rules." I finished. "Gods... you're worse than a bunch of children." I snapped. Not one of them disagreed with me. They needed my help just as much as I needed theirs so they were being unusually tolerant. I regretted my outburst when I finally looked at Apollo and saw that he watched Gabrielle's unconscious form. He had a big stake in this too it seemed. He finally got to know his daughter after all these years and it was apparent to me from the start that he loved her dearly. Not nearly as much as her wife, however. "Okay, how and when? Give me all you got and let's get this show on the road." I said quickly. I didn't need to consult with anyone else, their fears and opinions wouldn't change my mind. I told Gabrielle that if she wanted the Golden Fleece, I'd leave on the journey tomorrow. Well, indirectly she needed this mysterious Elixir and one journey is much like another to a warrior. * * *
Apollo and I sat at the table inside the Queen's hut. The rest of the Gods joined their forces on Olympus to keep Hera's armies at bay. We chose to talk here so Gabrielle would know what we were doing and when. It drives my wife crazy not to be a part of my adventures. It was almost noon and the sun was high in the sky and Apollo was still explaining portions of the map to me. He described pitfalls and traps, monsters and guards until I began to feel this wasn't going to be an in & out kind of job. At one point he paused and looked up at me.
"Xena, will you be able to remember all this?" I just raised an eyebrow up high and gave him my best smirk. He smiled back, a touch of embarrassment in his face. I think he'd momentarily forgotten to whom he was speaking. "The Stone Palace is at the center of the island." He said, referring to the island that was situated deep underground, in the very depths of Delos. "I've already alerted my priests, they won't give you any trouble and they'll help you where they can. You will find trouble from Hera's men, though. She sent warriors to guard the Palace the moment fighting broke out among us. I haven't told anyone else this, Xena, but I think Hera wants the Elixir too. Not just so we can't get our hands on it, but I think she wants it on hand should anything happen to her own self." "That sounds pretty much like Hera... always out for number one." I couldn't help muttering. "Don't underestimate her warriors, Xena, they're very good." Apollo commented. "I'm better." I stated matter of factly. Apollo smiled again and for the umpteenth time I was reminded of how similar he and Gabrielle were. His green eyes sparkled when he spoke and when he smiled, his nose kind of turned up like hers does. Gods, I miss her. I was staring at her still form when I felt the touch on my arm. "We all want this, Xena and I'll do everything in my power to defeat Hera." Apollo said sincerely. I placed my other hand on top of his. "I know you will Apollo. That makes two of us." "You're going to have more than just guard trouble once you're inside the Stone Palace. The place is a maze of locks and traps. Anyone who makes it that far had better be able to pick a lock."
"Then I know just the person I need to go with me." I smiled as I thought of an old friend. "So, how do I get to Delos in the first place?" I asked. "Time is the all important factor. You'll have to allow me to transport you there and bring you back. Anything else would take too long. I nodded my head even though I hated the thought of leaving my body in the hands of a God, hoping that when I arrived where I was supposed to be that I had all my parts with me. "You're going to have to let me off in Corinth before we go on to Delos. There's a certain King of Thieves that I'll need to take with me and last I heard he was spending a small fortune up in a brothel in Corinth. "A brothel?" Apollo arched an eyebrow. "Then he may not want to go with." Oh, he'll go allright... once I convince him that it would be a wise move, health wise." Apollo chuckled. "Then we'll go at first light. I can travel to Corinth with you and send the two of you on to Delos from there. Are you up for all of this, Xena?" "Sounds like the kind of outing I dream of." I answered. A few more moments of chit-chat and Gabrielle's father left. It was late afternoon by the time I ate a little something and told Ephiny what I was doing. As usual, the Regent wanted to come with, at the very least send some Amazons along. I had to explain to her that this was the kind of trek where having more people around would only make it that much more difficult. She gave in but I could tell she didn't like it. When I got to the hut, Sartori sat by the side of the bed. She was reading from some scrolls to Gabrielle. I smiled at the sight. I guess that's what I looked like in here, talking to Gabrielle like she was going to get up and answer me any minute. Sartori read a list of petitions that were to be decided on by the Queen. When she saw me she lowered the scroll and
looked as if she just realized how late it was. She stood and gave Gabrielle's hand a squeeze. "Just a little work that the Queen will have waiting for her on her return." She said, holding the scroll up. "Don't you think for a minute that you'll be able to get out of work this way, my Queen." Sartori finished, speaking directly to Gabrielle. Once more I was alone with my wife, lying in bed, her body resting in my arms. "I love you, Brie." I said softly, simply because it had been a while since the last time I said it. "I would go anywhere and do anything for you, my heart, you know that don't you? I'd follow you to the very ends of the world, Gabrielle." I couldn't help chuckling a little at that statement. I remembered when I followed her around Athens without her knowing, another story I wanted her to know about. "Brie, do you remember when you left to go to the Academy For Performing Bards in Athens? Remember how easily it seemed that I let you go, not that I could have or would have stopped you from fulfilling your dreams, but did you ever wonder about that? I never really left you, love. Of course, I know you're going to smack me as soon as you get back, but I followed you around Athens. Honey, I didn't know what else to do." Okay, I realized to myself, now I sound like I'm trying to rationalize the whole experience. "I mean, I couldn't stand just letting you leave and I would have been worrying about you all the time anyway. I guess by then I pretty much thought of you as mine and I didn't like the fact that it might not be true. Gods, I drove you crazy back then didn't I, my heart? I wouldn't allow myself the luxury of having you because I didn't think I was good enough for you, but I didn't want anyone else to have you either." I kissed Gabrielle's warm lips and held her tighter. It was very true. I could
never find the courage to tell Gabrielle of the feelings that grew inside of me for the young bard, feelings that grew stronger and more powerful every day. I even had physical flings on occasion just to try and talk myself out of the notion that my heart was no longer my own. The experiences were disappointing at best. Each time I kissed someone else I likened the feeling to what I felt simply being close to Gabrielle. In the end nothing could compare. I watched, and on some occasions I thought I saw a flicker of the same passion being returned in kind, but still I kept my silence. I never said a word, even on that day that I play over and over again in my mind. I know I should be past it all now, I mean, Gabrielle is my wife and we love each other, but I should have been her first. There are times when I'm lying in the darkness, holding Gabrielle close to me, that I think of the day she married Perdicus. I can't go back and berate myself because Gabrielle and I have both made our peace, as well as forgiveness, with one another. We realize what is in the past cannot be undone, but sometimes... sometimes the wanting of it so bad overwhelms me. If I could have but one wish in my life with Gabrielle, I wouldn't ask for wealth or an expensive home. If I were granted just one wish, it would be to go back to that day when Gabrielle told Perdicus yes. I would swallow my damnable pride and bare my heart to the young bard, who was still more girl than woman. I would offer to love her and protect her for the rest of our lives if she would only choose me... If I could be her first. * * *
"I have to go now, Brie." I bent over to kiss my wife. It felt strange to kiss those lips that didn't respond to my touch. They were warm, though, and if I didn't know better, I would have swore that the corners curled up ever so slightly in a smile. "I love you, my heart." I whispered. "Remember... I'll never be gone from you for long, Brie, and to find me all you have to do is look inside your
heart." I kissed my wife again and stood at the open door to the hut as Ephiny walked in with an armload of scrolls and a small bag of personal belongings. The Regent agreed to stay in the hut and look after Gabrielle while I was gone. I smiled slightly at the juggling act the Amazon was doing before she finally dumped the items on the bedside table. Ephiny acted like I wasn't even in the room as she began speaking to Gabrielle and my smile grew even larger. "Don't think for one minute that you can get out of work this easy, my Queen. I'm going to sit here and read every one of these petitions and treaty requests to you and when you get back you can damn well do your own work!" The Regent's low voice deadpanned and I knew wherever Gabrielle was she was having a good laugh at her friend. I looked back through the open door once more in my wife's direction and found it hard to get my feet to take that first step. "I'll keep a close eye on things here. Best speed, Xena." The Regent said. "I'll do my best Eph. So long, Brie. I'll be back before you even have time to miss me." Then I took a deep breath and walked out of the hut. Apollo was already waiting for me, but when I reached the bottom of the steps I almost ran into Eponin standing there outfitted for a journey. I immediately knew what the dark-haired Amazon had in mind. "I go this one alone, Ep." I said. "Look, before you say no, think about this Xena. I know you don't need a whole tribe in your way, I know how you like to work. I understand the need for having Autolycus there, but you need at least one more warrior in case things get dicey." I was prepared to argue, but barely got passed opening my mouth and taking a breath.
"Xena..." The warrior paused and I watched as she struggled with the tears that were common place around here now. "Gabrielle means a great deal to me, as do you. Please... as a warrior I can't sit here protected in this village while someone else goes off to save my own people. Don't ask me to do that, my friend." What was I supposed to counter that one with? I understood exactly what she was saying and as a warrior I agreed with every word. "Hope ya know how to cook," I held out my hand as she grasped my forearm, "because without Gabrielle along we could get mighty hungry before this is all over." We exchanged a warrior's handshake and Eponin looked up at me. "Wait a minute, you mean Gabrielle does all the cooking? Well, I may have to rethink this now." I punched her in the arm good-naturedly and indicated to Apollo that we were ready. "First stop, a brothel in Corinth." I said to the God and without any more of a preamble than that I found my body experiencing the strangest sensation I'd ever felt. It felt as if my body exploded into a million minuscule pieces, then those pieces rushed forward as if caught in the center of a swirling vortex. I knew my brain was still together because I was able to think, but I wasn't aware that I had any physical shape. Suddenly, as swiftly as we took off, it seemed like all those tiny pieces were coming together again. Gods, I hoped they all ended up in the right spot. Apollo easily materialized in front of us, but I felt like my body was suddenly way too heavy and I had to bring myself up sharply to avoid landing on my face. Eponin did just that, ending up face down in the dirt. That's when my stomach caught up to the rest of me and I fought desperately to keep my breakfast down. Much as I anticipated, Eponin lost her battle with her morning repast.
"That's gonna get old in a hurry." I drawled to Apollo, helping a weak-kneed Eponin to her feet. "Sorry about that, Xena, I should have warned you. Mortals tend to have a bit of trouble with materializing that way." Apollo apologized. Apollo hit pretty close to the mark by dropping us in one of the many side alleys off Corinth's busy city streets. "I wasn't sure which brothel you were interested in." The blonde God said. "So, I put us in the district." "You mean we're going to an actually brothel?" Eponin asked. "What did you think I meant when I said we're going to a brothel in Corinth?" I asked the confused Amazon. "I don't know... I thought maybe it was a code word for something." Ep looked up, her face turning a little pink. I laughed at my traveling companion. "We need Autolycus and last I heard he was staying at a brothel in Corinth. Chances are it's at Tai Li's place, but if my hunch is wrong, she'll know where we can find him." "How do you know this Tai Li?" Eponin asked the question I hoped no one would. "I refuse to answer on the grounds that I met her long before I knew Gabrielle." I said in a low drawl. Even Apollo couldn't help but grin a tiny bit. "It's called the Pink Lotus, come on, it's a couple of streets north of here." I replied and we set off. * * *
"Well, well, the Warrior Princess finally come to visit me again and she bring friends." We all turned at once to see the slender Asian woman walk directly up to me and put on a most seductive smile. The small woman was older than her body displayed her to be and when she ran her hands along the muscles of my arms, it was extremely hard to tell my body not to react. "Tai Li," I said grabbing her wandering hands and holding them prisoner in my own. "I don't go by that title anymore. A lot has changed since the last time we saw each other." I knew my face must have been turning red because right then and there a vision of what I did in this brothel the last time I was here with this beautiful woman flashed into my mind. "I'm looking for a man." I added. "You... looking for a man? You right, things have changed." She laughed and I could hear Eponin give a little snort. All I could do was turn even redder. "I mean I'm looking for a friend, I have reason to suspect he might be enjoying some of the scenery in your establishment. He's tall, dark hair, a tad good looking, and much more full of himself than he has a right to be." "Ahhh, the King of Thieves!" "That would be him." I answered. Only Autolycus would bandy that title about in a whorehouse. "Oh, yea, he been staying in the suite on the top floor. With the way he throw his money around, I give him any girl he want, as long as he want. What about you warrior?" Tai Li started those hands moving again and I felt like I was trying to keep track of a giant squid with a hundred tentacles. "I remember a time when you used to come in and throw money around plenty too."
By this time Eponin had her hand over her mouth and I just knew it was to stifle the laughter that was about to break free any minute now. I was more worried about the expression that I couldn't see on Apollo's face. My father in law was watching another woman paw at me and he was behind me so I couldn't catch a glimpse of his face. Gods had a lot of quirky ways and seeing his only daughter's wife playing touchy-feely with the Madame of a whorehouse might be the kind of thing he would not find amusing. "Uhm, Tai Li... look... I'm married." I finally blurted out. The Madame looked a little stunned by the news. She folded her arms across her ample chest and stared at me in disbelief. I hadn’t told her, to whom I was married yet, perhaps she forgot who Gabrielle was. A few summers back after I helped out in that ridiculous Miss Known World pageant, Gabrielle and I decided we deserved a week in a big city. I suggested Athens and I figured Gabrielle would jump at the chance. My bard wanted to see Corinth. I didn’t have as good a time as I thought I might, at least when we were out in public. A lot of people knew the Warrior Princess in this town, correction... a lot of women knew the Warrior Princess in this town. I had garnered a reputation in a lot of parts of Greece, but Corinth and it’s plentiful whorehouses saw quite a bit of my action in the old days. Gabrielle and I were strolling around the lanes of the market booths when I saw Tai Li coming straight for us. The small Asian woman was stopping at various booths examining the wares. She looked up as Gabrielle and I passed and as much as I wanted to ignore her so it wouldn’t come out who she was, my integrity wouldn’t allow it. If I was able to walk into the Pink Lotus in broad daylight, then I certainly shouldn’t be embarrassed to know the women that worked there. Introductions were made and for a brief heartbeat, I thought I saw a flash of jealousy in Gabrielle’s emerald eyes. Hindsight tells me now that’s what it was, but at the time I didn’t think it possible. Of course, my bard being the young woman she was, graciously spoke with Tai Li and soon I found
myself strolling behind the two small women, holding a growing pile of market purchases. The Madame was gracious in her own way. It wasn’t good business to let husband’s wives know their men did business at the local brothel and so Tai Li was very closed mouth in answering my bard’s questions. I was sure she assumed Gabrielle was my lover and I didn’t discourage that notion. By the time we left the market, Gabrielle knew no more about my history with Tai Li and the Pink Lotus than when we all met. The Madame, however, discovered just about everything about my small companion. Finally, when Gabrielle walked over to look at a market stall filled with delicate hair combs, Tai Li pulled me down to her level and whispered in my ear. "Don't you come by my place no more, warrior. Little Amazon Princess should be all you need from here on in." Then she smiled and waved to Gabrielle, leaving me standing there rather speechless. When I walked up to Gabrielle she was holding a small ivory hair comb and when I saw her hand it back to the vendor, realizing it wouldn't fit into our budget, I plucked it from her fingers. Reaching into my pouch I pulled a few hidden dinars out and paid for the comb, then, much to my bard's surprise, I handed the gift to her. "What's this for?" She looked at me rather stunned. "For just being you, Gabrielle," was the only answer I could give. I assumed when I first walked in the Pink Lotus that Tai Li thought I left the small blonde by the wayside, since she was looking like she wanted to pounce and devour me. Now she stared at me like I just handed her a bit of information that was impossible to believe. "You... married... for real?" She finally asked. "Let me see." She ordered as she held her hand out. So she did remember who Gabrielle was after all.
I pulled my gauntlet off and extended my right arm. She took hold of my hand and turned it over to look at the inside of my wrist. There, no larger than a dinar, was a small tattoo, an Amazon marriage knot. The mark was a sign that I was a bondmate to Amazon royalty, Gabrielle had a similar tattoo on the inside of her wrist. In many ways the mark was a comfort to me. To the rest of the world, it was a sign of commitment. A person may be able to hide a piece of jewelry that signified their marriage, but this was a little harder to disguise. To me, my mark was a like a brand, signifying ownership and all the responsibilities that entailed. I belonged to Gabrielle just as she belonged to me and the mere notion comforted me. It is a major responsibility... to own someone so completely, to be held accountable for their well-being and happiness. It was one that I know Gabrielle took as seriously as I did. "Well, Amazon Princess got you after all, eh?" Tai Li smiled and for the first time since entering the establishment I felt relaxed. I smiled back at her and nodded my head. "Only now she's an Amazon Queen and I think I'm the one who finally caught her." She laughed again, understanding the significance of that statement. "I just send new girl up to your friend's room. Why don't you have a drink on the house and he be done soon." I looked around and my companions agreed, except for Eponin. The Amazon and Tai Li were making a little eye contact and when Apollo and I sat down at the table in the corner to enjoy our port, Eponin rushed up to the table with a definite gleam in her eye. "Xena, can you lend me some dinars?" The warrior asked. "Hey, I told you we were coming to a brothel first, you should have brought some from home." I ribbed her. "Oh yea, right. Like you ever take care of the purse strings." She jibed right back.
I looked up sheepishly at that remark for it was true. Gabrielle usually took care of our money and I rarely knew how much we had if I didn't ask. Apollo reached into the tattered cloak he wore to hide his armor and tossed a small bag of coins at Eponin. "Have the time of your life, warrior." He smiled, and like his daughter, when Apollo smiled all those around him smiled. "Hey, Xena," Eponin whispered to me, "is she worth it?" "Ep, she'll make you see colors you never knew existed." I told her and watched as the Amazon and Tai Li walked upstairs arm in arm. Apollo and I made small talk through 2 mugs of port, but finally a silence descended on us and when I looked up at last I realized that it was the small blonde back home that captured both of our thoughts. I cleared my throat and pushed away from the table. The last thing I wanted to do was start crying again. "I think I'll head upstairs to find Autolycus... I shouldn't be too long." I said and the God nodded his head, not knowing what else to say either. I could tell from the sounds coming from the other side of the door that things were just winding down. This was the room the bartender indicated belonged to my friend and so I figured barging in would be completely appropriate. Hey, I let him finish, which I thought was pretty big of me considering the circumstances. I pounded heavily on the door and then thrust it open. I leaned against the open door frame and waited for the thief to look up. The young woman saw me first and tried to cover herself, which I find extremely odd considering where we are. That's when Autolycus covered his ass with the sheet and looked over his shoulder. "Auto, baby," I drawled... our little long-standing joke. "Xena... I should have known, he pulled the sheet higher and rolled off the young woman. "What, some orphans need rescuing and you just can't do it
without my help, right? Only you would bust in at a time like this." "If I remember correctly you did the same thing to me once... and we were most definitely not finished." I said referring to a time in Amphipolis. We stayed at mother's inn and Autolycus was there too. Gabrielle and I started a little something in the baths that we shouldn't have and once we got rolling, we simply had too hard of a time stopping, so we went for it. "Hey, if I remember correctly that was not a private bath and if you hadn't of wanted to be caught you should have stuck a chair under the doorknob." He replied. "It was definitely worth the price of admission, though." He grinned. "I need your help, Autolycus." I said seriously. "Oh great. Whenever you need my help it means it's for the greater good, which means there's nothing in it for me. Besides, what are you doing in a place like this? Gabrielle wouldn't let you within a league of this place. Where is the little chatterbox anyway?" I don't know if it was what I said or the look on my face that changed his mind. "Gabrielle's... she's not well." I stated. He was silent for a few heartbeats, all the while staring into my eyes. "Give me a few minutes to get dressed," was all he said. "I'll be downstairs." I responded soberly and left the way I'd come. * * *
I felt a hand on my shoulder and then saw Autolycus slide into a seat at our table.
"Autolycus, this is Gabrielle's father," I explained. "But, I thought--" "Her real father." I finished. He shook hands with Apollo. I left it to the God if he wanted to tell my friend who he really was. "Well, The King of Thieves at your service. You look rather familiar to me." Autolycus mused as he shook the God's hand. "I should Autolycus, you've stolen enough goods from my temples, I'm sure my face was on some of it." Apollo said with a grin. Auto looked at me and I couldn't help smiling too. My friend looked a little panicky. "Apollo, my friend Autolycus." I said, trying to stifle my laughter. "Did I say King of Thieves? Well, what's in a title... it's a label and I hate to label people, why just the other day--" "Autolycus... he doesn't care." I stopped my friend's rambling. "No harm done, Autolycus." Apollo said with a small smile. They all stared at me then, expecting me to speak. For Autolycus' benefit I related the condensed version of what was happening and watched as the expression on his face grew more serious. I knew I would take grief from the thief for sucking him in on this little vacation in Tartaurus, but that didn't matter much to me now. I wondered how well I hid my shock when Autolycus looked me in the eye and said, "When do we leave?" I looked in turn at my friends and lowered my eyes to my own hands, folded
on the table in front of me. "Look, you two need to know that this could very well be a one way trip. All of a sudden I don't feel so comfortable bringing you in on this and I'd prefer it if you both just stayed here." I blurted out. I tried to give them out in case they were as worried about this journey as I was. I needn't have worried about their level of commitment. "Oh, sure, I'm beginning to see how this is gonna be," Autolycus nudged Eponin and I could only stare at him in confusion. "The great Warrior Princess goes off on her own and saves the known world, and when they ask us where we were during the whole thing, we can say we were in a bar. Then all the glory goes to the Warrior... nobody will even remember the name of the thief and the Amazon. Well, forget it. I'm not about to be left out on all the loot that could come my way from this one." Eponin had a huge grin on her face during the thief's tirade. "Ditto." She stated. I could only shake my head at the two. It was hard for me to except such unconditional friendship from anyone but Gabrielle... I was at a loss for words. "You two are completely pathetic... and I love you." I'm not sure I really meant for that to come out and we all kind of gruffly exchanged the sentiment in low mumbles. Gods, I am getting hormonal! Autolycus had a few things to attend to before he left and Eponin said since we were waiting for him, she trailed off as her eyes settled on Tai Li. I motioned them both away and told them we'd all meet here in the bar in two candlemarks. Apollo decided to pop onto Olympus and see if there were any changes in the way the battle was progressing, which left me on my own. I found a nice table in the back, against the wall, and ordered a port. I
leaned my chair back on two legs and watched the patron come and go through the bar and then into Tai Li's establishment. It didn't take long before I was thinking of Gabrielle and wondering how she was. I wondered if she would be able to grasp my thoughts from so far away and I gave her a silent 'I love you' just in case. Autolycus surprised me, but then again it was really no surprise. I think once he knew it was Gabrielle in trouble he already decided he would stand up and fight, so to speak. You see, Autolycus was in love with Gabrielle. It didn't bother me because first of all I knew my friend would never do anything about it, and secondly, just about everyone we ever ran into fell at least a little for the small blonde. He admitted it on my wedding day of all days. Oh, I don't think he knew what he was confessing to, but as we stood apart from Gabrielle and some of her Amazons, Autolycus seemed to sober up.
"Don't ever mess this one up Xena." Autolycus said. "Don't ever get tripped up and fall on your face with this one." "Why?" I chuckled. "Because there are too many of us waiting in line to take your place." I laughed out loud and slapped his back. "I'll keep an eye on my feet." I replied. I could tell by the look in his eye that he was serious. He and I had always shared a great deal of sexual innuendo in our verbal spars with one another, but the look on his face told me that the way he felt about Gabrielle was on a whole other level. Then of course he had kissed her. I mean, I kissed her, he was just along for the ride. Gods, that kiss. It was one of the most perfect moments in my entire life... and I was dead. Before Gabrielle was able to save a small bit of the Ambrosia, enough to bring me back to life, I didn't think I would ever see her again. When she opened her eyes and was in a level of reality where she could actually see me, I nearly wept. I had so much I wanted to say to her, first and foremost
was how much I loved her. And not as in 'you're my best friend' kind of love, but deep down, 'this is it and it's forever kind of love.' That's when I realized I couldn't do that to her. If I confessed my love and wasn't able to return to the living, what would my bard go through? She would have all these feelings, that she may not have shared, just dumped on her and she would have to through the rest of her life trying to reconcile them without me around. And, what if she did feel the same way? Would that have been any less cruel? So I kissed her. It was a truly perfect kiss, our tongues barely making contact as we parted our lips. I knew, for at least that one moment, that Gabrielle felt something for me too. If she hadn't let her mind wander, we would have stayed in that alternate plane. I remember thinking later that it was a good thing Gabrielle's concentration faltered or else I would have had a very hard time letting go of that sweet mouth. I wonder now if it was Autolycus' hand on her backside that brought her back to reality. Gods if my wife could have seen the look on her face when the thief asked her if we got everything straightened out... the expression was priceless. It makes no sense to lie to myself and I have to admit that Autolycus was a good sport about being smacked around later. You see it was my hand that found its way to Gabrielle's rear. I mean, it was his hand, but... well, I put it there. I guess I can admit it in my own thoughts, but I definitely felt that if I wasn't going to return to the living, well, I figured I was going to grab a handful of that attractive ass on my way out. I know, pretty lame from a warrior with a code of honor, but desperate times sometimes make you do crazy things. Love makes you do even crazier ones. Soon, my companions joined me and I was amazed that I was sitting there reminiscing for over two candlemarks. When Apollo joined up with us all he would say was,
"No change. Gabrielle is still fine, though." I knew he said that for my benefit and I guess the word fine was a relative term here. I understood that Gabrielle could get no worse physically, but I'm sure living alone in her dreamscape is a form of Tartaurus for her. We stopped in a few shops at the north end of town and purchased some supplies we would need. It was mid afternoon by the time we were ready to go. I was rather shocked at the way Apollo grabbed me and hugged me, placing a very gentle kiss on my cheek. It was something a father would do and the weird part about it was I kind of liked it. "I'll be placing you on Delos, right in front of the cavern that will lead down to the Stone Palace. Do you remember the map and all I told you, Xena?" I nodded my head. I found myself unable to speak, overwhelmed by emotions. Apollo looked scared to death and I knew that this just wasn't about me and Gabrielle anymore; this was about every last human in the world. "I won't fail." I found myself saying with a steely resolve. "I have one last gift to give you." The God said and Apollo grasped my hand. Surges of I don't know what shot through me and I nearly dropped to my knees at the sensation. It was an incredibly powerful impression and my face flushed in embarrassment considering the feeling reminded me of something akin to an orgasm. This exchange only lasted for a few heartbeats, but it left my hands shaky as Apollo loosed his grasp on me. "The strangeness will wear away in a moment or two." He responded, understanding what I was going through. "It won't help you materialize any fireballs, but the strength I've given you will give you an added edge." He explained. "When you need the most strength, concentrate on what gives you power in life, and the force will be there for you.
Then I knew what the unbelievable feeling was. It was adrenaline, plain and simple. The rush that went through me was like the feeling I get when I start to fight; only this was much more concentrated and intense. "Sure, she gets the God powers, we get swords." Autolycus looked at Eponin as he deadpanned. "That seems fair." Without another word Apollo sent us on our way. * * *
The trip to Delos barely affected me this time and I could only surmise that the cause was the power that Apollo infused me with. On the other hand my two companions were on their knees in the sand, tossing up the port that they consumed earlier. "How many more times do we have to do that?" Eponin asked, rising to her feet. "Sorry about that guys," I apologized and helped each of them to stand and get their bearings. "Hopefully the next time we do that we'll be going home." "I won't be recommending this anytime soon to my travel agent." Autolycus fussed, trying to compose himself. "Okay, Xena…what now?" They both looked at me and I had the pleasant task of informing them that we were to enter the yawning cavern we faced. "I was afraid that's what your answer would be." Eponin muttered as we prepared to enter the cave. We were all a little in awe of the massive cavern. I don't think I've ever been something quite as large before and the walls seemed to be made of some type of multicolored crystals that sparkled when the light from our
torches hit them. Apollo said to immediately take the path to the right and we veered that way, feeling the path grow steeper as we went. Finally we came to the edge of the cliff, below us a drop off into complete blackness. I tossed one of our torches down into the blackness, knowing we wouldn't need them once we descended. All three of us leaned over the edge and waited for what seemed like an eternity until the flame was extinguished by the inky blackness. We all straightened up and looked at one another. A loud audible gulp was heard as we all three swallowed at once. "You sure he said veer to the right?" Autolycus asked, worry evident in his voice. "Yea, we have just to make a little climb to get to the bottom." I answered. "Xena I don't think we have enough rope to make it even half the way there." Eponin added. I pulled the pack from my shoulders and rummaged until I found three lengths of rope. Apollo said they were a gift from Aphrodite. I had a few gifts like this in the sack that I carried, and my father in law said I would know when each of them would be needed. This seemed like a good time for the rope, especially since there was three of us and three lengths of rope. "Is that to hang ourselves with, because you don't seriously think that is going to take us to the bottom?" Autolycus complained. "They're a gift from Aphrodite and the rope is supposed to grow in length as you need it." I tossed the other lengths of rope to my companions and tied the end of mine to a stalagmite, which appeared to be growing out of the cavern floor. I fastened the other end around my waist and back again and waited while the other two prepared theirs similarly. Once they were finished we all looked down again and they looked to me.
"I take it that means I go first?" I asked dryly. "Well, it is your expedition." Autolycus answered watching a bit of gravel go over the side. I positioned the balls of my feet on the edge of the drop off and tentatively let my weight go against the rope. I gave a weak grin and motioned for Eponin to hand me one of the torches. I found it a bit unsettling that the last thought to roam through my head, as I let my complete weight lean into the rope I was suspended from, was that I hope Aphrodite didn't take all those wise cracks of mine personally. This would be a very bad time for her to get even. I descended into the dark and once the cliff face disappeared and I lost a place to put my feet, I felt a few heartbeats of apprehension. I could feel the length of rope dangling behind me, but miraculously it grew as our descent continued. Dropping into the pitch black, no sound but our own breathing and drops of water as they fell into cavern pools, I began to talk to my friends. When Eponin answered the first time I could tell by the strain in her voice that she felt the same anxiety. I hoped that if they had something to concentrate on, it would take their minds off of the nothingness we plunged into. "Ep, has Autolycus ever told you about the statue of Pax?" I started with a grin. "Pax? What the heck is that?" Eponin answered. "Oh, just a little statue about twenty feet high that was supposed to be the personification of peace. The thing came up missing during the annual celebration and guess who happened to be in town." "Autolycus... I'm impressed." Eponin replied. "How did you make off with something that big?" "I didn't, hey, Xena... tell her what really happened!" Autolycus responded.
I had them talking at least. Hopefully now their minds were on the story being related and not what was below us. I encouraged Autolycus to tell the tale. I only kept one ear open, since I lived it along with the thief. I have to admit that suddenly my thoughts strayed to my bard once again. She and I had decided to play a couple of outrageous character in Auto's little espionage ploy. He pleaded with me saying he had to get his title as the King of Thieves back and so Gabrielle and I promised to do it his way... finesse and subterfuge over brawn. We had to head to Mykonos to follow the thief who really stole the statue, but I'll forever remember a very short interlude Gabrielle and I shared in that bedroom. Of course, this was before my wife and I revealed our feelings for one another, but this was about three years after I met Gabrielle. We had experienced some intense healing after the rift that developed between us. It was right after some very emotional times. Most memorable to me was the time spent in that barn, waiting for the Persian army to attack and realizing that if my bard died from that poison arrow, I would rather die in battle than live without her. That's when I made her the second biggest promise of our lives, that even in death, I would never leave her. Gabrielle went through the torture of playing judge, jury, and executioner for Crassus while we were in Rome and she finally felt the healing waters from Mnemosyne's temple after that. It was a rough season for us emotionally, but Gabrielle and I grew closer as friends, not realizing that both of us wanted to progress further in the relationship. I often wonder how differently things would have turned out for Gabrielle and I had Autolycus not burst into that room on the island of Mykonos when he did. We saved the statue and Autolycus regained his crown, but we were forced to wait until the next day to sail from the island. That night was only one of many torturous evenings I spent being consumed by my desire for my innocent young bard. * * *
"Xena, you're hurt," Gabrielle said when I turned toward her after I closed the door to our room. I followed her eyes and remembered the wound that I acquired earlier that day. It was right underneath the left breast portion of my armor, a small slice in my leather where my ribs began. "Oh, yea... I kinda forgot." "Forgot? Xena, it looks like it's three inches long." Gabrielle fussed in that way that made me realize that there would be no rest until I let her stitch it closed for me. By the time Gabrielle gathered a few first aid items from our bags, placed water in a bowl, and was waiting for me on the edge of the bed, I actually thought about where my wound was. "Here let me help you." Gabrielle said, relieving my fingers, which suddenly went quite numb, of the task of removing my breastplate. "Pull your leathers down," she said rather matter of factly. I was so thankful that she turned her head to thread the needle after she said that. My eyes were about to pop out of my skull at the thought of Gabrielle attending to me a few inches away from where I really needed her to be ministering to me. I stole a few glances back at the door and simply thought about bolting, but what would I use as an excuse? Gabrielle turned to face me again. "Xena... what are you waiting for? Are you okay?" "Oh, sure." I managed to croak out. I slid the leather straps off of my shoulders and peeled the close fitting leather down my body. I steeled my jaw as my body reacted to the cool air, not to mention the blonde's stare. I had it down to my waist when Gabrielle spoke up.
"You might as well take them off for the night and I'll sew that tear for you too." Oh, yes... let the torture begin. I was left standing in front of the woman who captured all my fantasies and secret desires with nothing but my breeches on, and when she placed her hands gently against the outside of my breast, I wanted to moan, groan... whimper. I wanted to pull her head closer and watch her enclose a very tight, aching nipple into that warm inviting mouth of hers. Instead I clamped down and began grinding my teeth together. "Xena, this is kind of difficult when you clench your stomach muscles like that. Here, why don't you lay on the bed." I sat down and felt the pressure of her hand on my shoulder push me back against the bed. Oh, Gods... Hades take me now because Tartaurus couldn't possibly hold a worse torture for me. I lay there and had to resort to meditative practices. Gabrielle's soft touch and gentle loving manner was sidling its way into my very soul and I wondered what she would think if I reached out and took her hand in mine, placing it over my breast? At the very least, I wondered what she would say if I asked to kiss her, to make love to her? She finished and helped me with a cotton shift. The wound wasn't affecting me at all, but the bard's nearness definitely did something to my control. "Gabrielle... I need to ask you something." "Yes, Xena?" I thought I saw a touch of something odd in her eyes that day, in that moment, but I dismissed it. I look back now and wonder what a fool I was not to have recognized my wife's look that tells me she loves me and that I am her whole world. Back then I sure missed it.
I leaned closer and whether it was the scent of her skin, or the warmth in those green eyes, I knew I was going to kiss her. That's when the door burst open and Autolycus barged in. "Hey, either of you two have a little salve I can put on these aching muscles? Uhm... oops, did I interrupt something?" Autolycus broke in. "No!" We both answered in unison a little forcefully. We both began to blush so I have no doubt in my mind what the thief suspected. After all, he was there the season before for the kiss. I don't know if he and Gabrielle exchanged any words, I only remember stalking off in my cotton shift and boots, with a mumbled, "gonna go check on Argo." I was halfway through the castle when I realized that we took a ship to the island and Argo was back on the mainland in a cozy stable. * * *
I was so caught up in my own memories that I didn't notice how light it was becoming all around us and I wondered how long it had been that way. We could see the bottom of the cavern now and were perhaps two hundred feet from the gravel surface. I was amazed at the beauty of such a place and my first thought was how very much Gabrielle would love this place. The thought of my wife was what brought me out of my memories of the past. When my feet touched down on a firm surface once again I had to shake the stiffness out of them. It took Eponin and Autolycus a moment or two until they had their legs back under them also. We still held our torches in the air and I was rather amazed that what Apollo explained to me was absolutely true. He said we wouldn't need torches or lamps beyond this first immense cavern because of something called Fire Quartz. I didn't know what that substance was, but I put the torch out and motioned to
Eponin to do the same. I turned and gazed at the walls of the huge cave and noticed they sparkled and glowed as if lit from behind. The walls of the structure looked like folded draperies found in castles that stretched from ceiling to floor. A waterfall from high above fell into a pool below bathed in an eerie green light. It too glowed as if from its own light source. Great stalactites hung from portions of the ceiling, while stalagmites pushed up from the floor. It was the largest, most beautiful cave I ever saw and judging by the silence, my friends agreed. To the left of where we stood was the great waterfall and just to the left of the pool where the water fell, was an opening about half as tall as myself. I started moving and had to remember that this wasn't a sight seeing trip. "Remember, keep your eyes open. This is just the beginning." I said to the two behind me as we crawled through the undersized opening. We barely began traveling along the well-lit path that Apollo gave me instructions to follow when a large armored soldier jumped into the middle of the path we were on. Interestingly enough, his armor was all flash. Painted flames adorned the breastplate and the mask he wore over his face had the image of a skull painted on it. He did a few high kicks in the air and began tossing his sword from hand to hand, taunting me. I looked at the guy like he'd lost his mind. I couldn't sense anyone else around so I just turned my head slightly to look at Eponin. The Amazon shrugged her shoulders and loosened her crossbow from her back. We watched the lunatic warrior for the few heartbeats it took for Ep to notch an arrow, and then she took a step forward. "Stand down and surrender your sword." She commanded. He began to twirl the sword around a little more forcefully and took a step closer to me. I already had my sword drawn and this guy must have known who I was, still he advanced. Finally he lunged at me and as sparks jumped from our blades, where metal encountered metal, I took one last look at the Amazon.
"Go for it, Ep." I said. Eponin raised her crossbow and the mysterious warrior never wavered. Ep let loose an arrow that buried itself easily into his flimsy armor. The arrow imbedded itself deep into his chest and he sunk to his knees, his face in the dirt. I kicked him a couple times before reaching down to remove his mask. A burning sensation rose in my throat as I swallowed down the bile that forced its way up. Lifting the mask pulled the warrior's whole helmet off and thousand of beetles and roaches poured from the form of the man. I backed up quickly, but not before the stench of rotting flesh assailed my nostrils. "I guess Hera knows we're here." I said simply. * * *
The path we were on widened and we stopped to take a few swallows from our water skins. It was time to share a little more about where we were going in case the unthinkable happened and I was injured or incapacitated in some way. I knelt down to the cave floor and began drawing in the dirt, going slowly to ensure that my friends remembered this little lesson. By the time we stood and were ready to continue, I was ready to tell them about the next chamber we would be entering. Apollo called it the Cavern of Lost Souls. He wouldn't tell me who these lost souls were, but he was very explicit in his directions, do not listen to them. I explained this to my companions. "I don't get it," Autolycus responded. "What could they know about us?" "I don't know the details, I only know Apollo said they would try to get in your
mind and mess with your head. Their goal is to get you to take their place and they'll use any thought in your head to do that. Remember... don't listen to what they have to say." I finished and we continued on down the wide path that kept leading us steadily downhill. The walls on either side of the path soon contained a gruesome display. As we walked we noticed that the rock face was carved with hundreds of faces, some captured in a moment of agony, others looking forlorn and weary. We passed by the carvings, keeping our eyes on the path ahead of us and moving as quickly as we could. Suddenly, I had the uneasy feeling that I was being watched. When I looked up to assuage my fear, I couldn't stop the gasp that left my throat. "Don't look up... not even to save your life. Keep your eyes in the path. And keep following me." I yelled behind me before they had a chance to look up also. I stared and became horrified, and I have seen a lot in my lifetime. The carvings were all real flesh and blood and the terrifying thing was that the faces all looked familiar to me. I kept putting one foot in front of the other, slowly plodding along, trying not to acknowledge that their eyes followed after me. That's when I first heard it. "Xena... Xena?" A male voice called out to me and I knew immediately who it was. I tried not to respond, but it was so hard. Finally I caught sight of him. "Lyceus?" I asked. He nodded as much as his limited movement would allow. "This is your doing, Xena. If you had been quicker, I wouldn't have died at Cortes' hand that day. Why Xena... why did you let him kill me?" "No, Lyceus, that's not how it happened and you know it." I knew I shouldn't be responding but it was torture not to.
"I'm dead because of you, Xena. You let your little brother die that day. Wouldn't you trade places with me if you could?" The face that looked like Lyceus asked. "No. I'm sorry, I can't. It's not really you!" I turned my face from the wall and moved forward quickly. I felt the cool breeze hit my face and I knew we were almost out. I should have known they would save the best for last. "Don't leave without me, Xe... you promised. You promised..." Gabrielle's mournful wail called after me and I kept walking. "Even in death you said... even in death you would never leave me. I died, Xe. Before you could get back with the Elixir, I died." "Nooo!" I shouted, covering my ears. "You failed, Xena. You were my champion and you let me get sick and now I'm dead. You can't bring me back this time." Gabrielle's facial apparition accused. "I'm so sorry... ." I cried, my hands still over my ears to try and block the sound. "Xe... join me. Even in death... that's what you promised. Is there really any reason to go on if we can't be together?" I felt my head shaking back and forth. It was true. Gabrielle died; I failed her again. What good would life be without my bard? I found my hand reaching out, extending to some unseen force to bring me to my wife. I tried to move my feet forward, but after a few steps I was frozen in place. "Nooooo! Stop it!" I screamed, trying to take control once again. A sharp blow to the small of my back surprised me and knocked the air from my lungs. Lying on my stomach just inside the entrance to another portion of the caves, my head felt clearer already. I lay there gasping for breath, and looked to the ground beside me to see both Eponin and Autolycus, each on one side. It appeared as if my companions had literally
shoved me the remaining few feet of the way. "Sorry," Ep said. "I didn't know what in Tartaurus was going on, but I wanted out of that place in a hurry." "I never thought I'd be so thankful for someone hitting me." I smiled weakly. We got to our feet and decided to take a break and catch our breath. A pool of fresh water was not too far away and Autolycus volunteered to fill the water skins. I sat down on a rock ledge and began chewing absently on a piece of dried beef. The words that I heard that manifestation of Gabrielle saying continued to echo through my consciousness. I remembered that day... that promise. I made promises to no one in this life, but Gabrielle. And I never uttered the words unless I truly believed them. My wife always seemed able to extract an oath from me, especially if she asked for one. On that day, though, she didn't ask, not with words or in any way that a bystander would recognize. Perhaps it was because she didn't ask that I made the vow.
Even in death, Gabrielle... I will never leave you. And I meant it. I did something I never thought I'd do. I gave up. Me, who can always pull that one last little trick or perform one final miracle to save the day. I couldn't save my bard and I knew that life would hold no appeal for me once I was without her. And, she looked at me, her eyes so full of confidence in the decision she once made, two summers before, to follow an ex-warlord. To leave her home and all that she knew and loved. Her eyes burned with the fever of the poison, but I saw something else on that day. I saw a fire in those green depths that told me that my young companion developed beyond me. She surpassed me with her wisdom and convictions. Like the warrior she spent two summers emulating, her courage became all she had and she stood at the very entrance to Hades Domain and felt no fear. When the apparition accused me of failure, it got to me because that's
exactly what I was feeling lately. I am the Queen's Champion and it is my job to protect the Throne from seen as well as unseen foes. It was too late now, but it's true, I should never have allowed the Queen in those infirmary tents. My feelings went deeper than failure, however. It was guilt, plain and simple, that was plaguing me now. If I couldn't save my wife from this illness, just like I couldn't reverse the effects of the poison from that Persian arrow, was I still willing to follow her into death? That was what troubled my thoughts since my wife fell ill. There was a time when I would have had to die; life would have been unbearably painful without Gabrielle in it. Now, the pain would be no less, but through my wife's love and compassion to this old warrior's soul, she showed me that perhaps I could go on. I would not want to, and life would probably hold little else besides loneliness, but Gabrielle has infused a strength in me that I never knew I didn't have. She has given me something I never knew was missing before... the strength to live my life without her. And, for that I felt guilty. Eponin came over and sat down beside me, bringing me out of my melancholy thoughts. "Can you talk about it... what happened back there? I mean, what was that all about, Xena?" The Amazon asked in a quiet voice. I didn't look up, just continued to stare at my boots. "Guilt." I answered. I didn't offer any more explanation than that and she didn't press. Before too long we were on our way again and I had a feeling that what I just experienced, was only the beginning. * * *
When Autolycus returned from filling up the skins we were more than ready to put some additional distance between us, and the Cavern of the Lost Souls. We passed by the large pool that Autolycus just left and, referring to the map in my head, I easily located the ledge we needed to climb to. It wasn't anything I couldn't flip to, but might be a little trickier for my companions. It was a ledge that extended over the pool of water, a good twelve to fifteen feet above the water's surface. The bad part was that if you stood on the pool's edge, jumped and missed the ledge, you would end up sliding straight down a deep ravine. We quickly decided that I would jump to the outcropping and lower my whip to give the others a hand. Eponin came after me with no problem, but I was grunting at the effort of pulling up the thief. "You're getting old, Xena." Autolycus teased, once at the top. "Hah. You need to go on a diet." I countered. "Oh you think so, huh? I'll have you know that this figure has tempted the greatest beauties of Greece." "Tempted them to do what?" Eponin shot back. "Oh, I get it... you women all stick together." We all chuckled good-naturedly. For a few moments it was almost as if we weren't on a mission for our lives, but merely having a benign adventure. Autolycus thought twice about his weight as we peered over the ledge. We came to a dead end and this was the bottleneck Apollo told me about. Handholds were cut into the rock all the way down the wall like a built in ladder. About forty or fifty feet down the hand holds disappeared into a hole in the ground. I knew, from Apollo's instructions, the tunnel would narrow considerably, before we hit the ground. Then the tunnel was supposed to open up into another large cavern approximately twenty feet further. Eponin was an excellent rock climber so she volunteered to go first. Autolycus would follow her and I would bring up the rear, just in case there
was anyone following us. I had to admit that from Apollo's warnings, I expected more in the way of armed soldiers. "Just remember, Auto... you fall on me and I'll break you like a twig." Eponin said with a wink in the tall man's direction. "I just love it when a woman plays rough." Autolycus replied with a grin. The climb over the ledge and down wasn't too difficult, rather like climbing down a stationary ladder. The only tricky part was keeping your grip. This cave was like any other and water dripped from every rock and through every crevice. Water seeped from the cliff face and the carved hand and foot holds not only became slippery, but ages of erosion wore the carved areas smooth in some places. Eponin took her time and carefully checked each spot, making sure it was safe, before placing her booted foot in the next opening. I heard Autolycus groan and knew the big man was at the bottleneck. We had our packs in our hands and we passed them down to Ep, who tossed them to the bottom. I already removed my scabbard from my back and handed my sword down as well. I could feel my armor scrape along the tunnel, but I was able to make it through the narrow shaft without any trouble. Once we put our feet on solid ground, we had to duck our heads slightly to move through the rest of the passageway. We came out into a long wide cavern, not as high as the first cave we entered, but longer. Immediately to our left was a deep pool, in which water fell from the crevices in the rocks above. The stalagmites that rose up from the cave's floor were numerous; some came down from the ceiling in thick columns. It looked like a forest of stone and suddenly I had that feeling. It was a tingling down my spine that told me trouble was near. "I got a bad feeling about this place." I said to my companions and all three of us drew our swords. It didn't take long until they stepped from behind the columns. They all wore the same flashy armor as the first warrior Eponin nailed, but these guys
were a lot better. There were three of us and perhaps twenty-five of them... I figured the odds weren't bad. I didn't wait around for them to talk or make an offer; I pretty much knew their order was probably to bring Hera my head. I gave out with a throaty battle cry and did a front flip in front of the closest two. I brought my sword sharply against the first one's blade and at the same time kicked out with my right leg and doubled over the second. When his knees hit the ground, his head soon followed. I spun and brought my blade across the first warrior's middle, the steel easily slicing him in two. I caught their movement out of the corner of my eye as Autolycus and Eponin both used their swords effectively, the Amazon adding a short sword in her free hand that confused the warriors with broadswords. Autolycus wasn't trained as a warrior, but he held his own as well and I focused my attention on the next four that came at me. I leaped into the air, my boot heading straight for the chest of the first attacker. He fell and took the legs out of the second man. The remaining two smartened up and stopped their charge, waiting for me to come to them. I advanced a little slower, but they didn't worry me much. By this point instinct took over and I was all skill and intuition. Besides, now I could feel some of Apollo's power flowing through me and I wasn't getting as tired as I usually did. I leaped again and split my legs apart, kicking each man with an uppercut to the chin at the same time. It didn't incapacitate them, but it sure made them think twice. Before they could even rise to their feet, I instinctively thrust my blade behind me, pulling it in a swift motion, from the chest of one of the warriors. We pushed on; the three of us staying relatively close together. We advanced toward the back of the cavern and suddenly there was only us. The bodies that were strewn about the cavern floor were either dead or dying. "Well, that could have been worse." Autolycus panted. Without warning, two or three dozen more men rushed from the end of the
cave we'd just come from. "You were saying." I shouted over the oncoming clamor. We worked ourselves out onto a flat ledge and when I looked down I realized where we were. Below us was a steep incline of rock and mud. I knew this was where we had to go anyway so I crept closer to the edge and peered over again. It was about a five-foot drop from the ledge to the incline. "Remember the lake I said we had to go through to get to the palace?" I barked. They both looked at me and then over the side, realizing what I was suggesting. "Whatever we're gonna do, we better do it in a hurry!" Eponin yelled. "Follow me!" I cried as I flung my body over the ledge and landed on my backside, sliding straight down the steep hill. It was wet so I picked up momentum in a hurry. I hit the water with such an impact that I almost skipped across the surface like a stone. It wasn't easy treading water with the heaviness of my armor weighing me down and a sword in one hand. Once the other two hit the water I motioned them under the outcrop of rock where we could hang onto the rocks to catch our breath and, especially, where we would be safe from the volley of crossbow arrows that were coming our way. "Okay, we needed to be here anyway. The opening is at the bottom of this pool, about twenty feet down. Just take a deep breath and follow me. Any questions?" When they shook their heads I took a couple deep breaths and dove under. I didn't have to expel much strength as my own weight carried me rapidly to the bottom. I could see the opening easily as if there were light coming from the other side. When I pushed my way through I experienced
the same odd sensation that I did when I came through the underwater portal to the Underworld. I hit the ground and unfortunately, heartbeats later; Autolycus came through and landed on top of me, knocking the air from my lungs. "Oh, yea... you're definitely going on a diet." I grumbled once I could stand and talk. Amazingly enough our clothes and packs were perfectly dry. Part of me wanted to press on immediately, but we were to make a right turn and cross the Black Lake by way of a rope bridge, suspended hundreds of feet above the water. I had a feeling such a spot had the makings for a perfect ambush, so I elected that we rest for a while. We agreed that we needed the rest and would sleep for a candlemark each, leaving two of us awake at all times. Autolycus and Ep said they were too fired up to sleep so I stuffed my pack under my head and like a good warrior, fell asleep almost the instant I closed my eyes. My last thought was a vision of a blonde head and bright green eyes. * * *
At first I didn't realize I was dreaming, it all seemed so real. The sun was high up in the sky and birds and butterflies flew across my field of vision. Then, I saw the small blonde lying on an outcropping of rock, her arm hung over the low ledge as she twirled her fingers absently in the clear pond water. This was Gabrielle's place, the small pond outside of the Amazon village where she came to get away from everything. Adia told me this was where she found my wife when she entered her dreamscape. Gabrielle and I did this once before, but it was a mystery as to how we could end up sharing a dreamscape. I only knew that it would give me the chance to hold my bard again. "Brie?" I called out softly.
She turned her head and the look on her face could melt any warrior's heart, this one in particular. The look of unconditional love and devotion that always smiled out at me from Gabrielle's face still had a way of stealing my breath away. "Oh, Xe!" she exclaimed, once her brain registered that I was truly there. I barely let her feet touch the ground once I caught her up in my arms. "Gods, I love you, Brie." I cried out. "Xena, I missed you so much." Gabrielle murmured against my neck. "I missed you too, baby. Brie, how did you do this... get me into your dreamscape?" "Me? I thought you did it. I'm already asleep." my wife countered. "I'm afraid it was me." A deep voice behind me answered. I turned, quickly positioning my body between the stranger and Gabrielle. I drew my sword before I stopped to think that if this were a dream, what was a stranger doing there? He was tall, nearly seven feet tall was my guess. He had a small mustache and beard and deep set brown eyes, and his skin was the color of polished ebony. His bald head and flowing robes caused him to look like a mystic. That's when I realized who he was. "Morpheus." "Very good, warrior. Apollo's daughter..." he bowed slightly in Gabrielle's direction. "Are you really Morpheus?" my wife asked. "Yes, your Majesty, I am." The tall God responded, out of respect for my wife's Amazon status.
"I'm not sure I understand." I said warily. "I am not a warrior, Xena, I am a God with, shall we say, limited skills. I focus my abilities in the world you see around you, the dreamscape. Apollo explained to me the gravity of our situation against Hera and I am here to do my part. I cannot give you powers or stand with a sword at your side, but I can give you and your Queen this time together. It may not be all that you desire, but remember... it is your dream." He didn't say another word, just dematerialized in front of us, leaving us both a little shocked, yet deliriously elated. "Should I have brought up the trial he put me through to become his bride." Gabrielle said with an arch to her eyebrow. "I don't think Morpheus ever had anything to do with that, love. That was simply a case of his priests and henchman debasing his temple and the mystic beliefs." I answered. "Hey," I said turning and wrapping my arms around my wife. "Where were we?" I leaned down and pressed my lips to Gabrielle's soft full ones. She felt so good, she always felt like the perfect fit with my arms draped around her. I didn't want to think about the reality that waited for me when I awoke. I simply wanted to be with my wife and enjoy the deep, abiding love we shared. "What have you been up to all this time?" I asked as we walked to the sunny ledge and sat down. I watched as a number of large trout swam under the shaded area the outcropping provided. "Hey, I bet the fishing's great." That comment earned me a smack in the arm, but I expected it. As a matter of fact that was the reason I said it. Gabrielle was never much of a fishing buddy, but she sure loved to eat them.
"I talk to myself most of the time, or talk to the trees and the butterflies, just about anything to stay sane. I don't know how you do it, Xe, enjoy the silence. It's deafening." I laughed out loud at my wife's description of the blessed silence I reveled in. "So, what have you been talking to the trees about, love?" She snuggled up against me and we sat there, shoulder to shoulder. "I've been working on some new stories. At first I didn't think I could because I didn't have any writing materials, but then as soon as I thought about it a quill and parchment showed up, lying right beside me. I tried that with food, but it's just not the same." She looked rather serious and I couldn't help laughing again. "Would you like to hear a story?" she asked with excitement. Now, this is the point where I usually groan or roll my eyes. Gabrielle is unequaled as a bard, but I still give her a hard time over listening to her stories. I'm sure that part of her expected the same treatment and it felt so good to be able to surprise her. "Yes, please." I replied with just the proper amount of enthusiasm. Oh, I love that look. Gabrielle's eyes sparkled and her smile stretched across her whole face. It was an expression of more than joy. Even before we became lovers, she seemed to come alive at my praise. Her whole being displayed her happiness at pleasing me, and when I took the pleasure she offered, it only served to intensify her satisfaction. She motioned me toward her and rearranged herself so that my head lay in her lap. The exquisite feel of being cradled by my wife was second only to being able to gaze up at her beautiful face as she wove her tale. The story she told was light and funny and I found myself laughing out loud in spots. Gabrielle had a great sense of humor and she spiced up the narrative by making it slapstick funny in certain areas, and dryly
humorous in others. She threw in just enough sex; the lines delivered in a low sexy voice, that at the end of the recital I could feel a growing dampness between my thighs. As her tale concluded, Gabrielle reached down and flicked my lips with her tongue before capturing my mouth in a breath-stealing kiss. "Oh Gods, Brie." I groaned, feeling the dampness become a slow trickle of liquid fire "Xe, can we make love in the dreamscape?" I returned her question with a sexy, lopsided smile. "I don't see why not... My Heart, I've made love to you in my dreams for seasons now." I pulled her down until she lay beside me. I had a thought and decided to see if the dreamscape could be controlled the way Gabrielle conjured up a quill and parchment. I closed my eyes and wished. Suddenly, my wife and I had our naked bodies pressed together and a shudder ran down the length of my spine at the delicious contact. We both moaned at the feel of bare flesh. The trickle suddenly became a flowing river. It was no where near enough, however, and I spread my legs and pulled my wife's body tightly to me. This time it was Gabrielle's turn to groan once her thigh made contact with my drenched center. She wedged her muscled leg between mine and began a slow sensual grind against me. With each smooth movement, a little more pressure was applied, and I felt the tight bundle of nerves between my legs pulsate strongly. Gabrielle leaned over me and I couldn't resist the full breasts, swaying above me, just out of my reach. The moment my wife saw what I had my eyes on, she began to tease, keeping the flesh just out of reach. She had
to have known that I could be teased only so long considering the state of arousal I was in. I growled loudly and grabbed the firm mounds of flesh, pulling them each toward me and enclosing my mouth around both nipples at once. "By the Gods! Oh, Xe... yes." Gabrielle moaned. My wife's moans filled the air, not to mention the sound of wet flesh slipping and sliding together. The sounds, the scent of Gabrielle's arousal, her touch as she positioned her fingers between her thigh and my sensitive folds, all served to carry me higher. She used her thigh to press her fingers harder into my flesh. My hips bucked at the sensation and I knew that I didn't want to come alone. Not to be left out, I slipped my own long fingers into my wife's silky folds, teasing and reveling in the soft, warm wetness. Gabrielle cried out and spread her legs further, continuing the motion against me. As she eased herself lower I thrust three fingers inside her and pumped in and out, letting her hips dictate the rhythm. Just as suddenly I felt my wife enter me. I felt so full I had to wonder how much of her hand she had inside me. Her thumb ran in a tight little circle against my clit and I knew that if she kept that little move up, I was toast. I used my free hand to massage the breasts that swayed temptingly before me. I was so close, but I wanted Gabrielle with me. I pulled her to my mouth and sucked on one nipple as if it was the first time I tasted the delicacy. "Oh Xena... Gods... yes, oh yea... oh yea..." My wife began to chant, rocking her hand inside me and pressing her chest against me harder. I felt the tremors in my own legs first. I continued the thrusting in and out until Gabrielle's moans stopped and turned into high-pitched whimpers. Just as I felt the first spasms clenched at my fingers buried deep inside her, none too gently, I bit down on the nipple inside my mouth.
Gabrielle's whole body convulsed violently against my own and, unable to control my own passion, the sound of her ecstasy brought me to my own climax. We shivered in each other's arms as tiny aftershocks reeled us both. There was a word for this kind of satisfaction... absolute bliss. I love you, My Heart." I whispered, once I could breath again. "Mmm, love you too, warrior." Gabrielle replied sleepily, snuggling deeper into my embrace. Neither of us could keep our eyes open and yet we knew that when I awoke, it would be into the waking world. "Xena... your watch." I heard Eponin say and I was instantly awake. I splashed some cold water onto my face and looked with aching sadness at my reflection in the shallow pool. I missed my wife already and yet, I felt the way I always do after making love to that woman... invigorated, loved, and completely satisfied. I came back to discover Eponin fast asleep and Autolycus drawing in the dirt with his dagger. Before I could wipe it off my face Auto looked up. From the expression on his face, I could tell he suspected what my goofy grin was all about. "Must have been one Tartaurus of a dream, that's all I have to say." I chuckled softly so as not to wake Eponin. "You don't even know the half of it, friend." Autolycus took his turn at rest and when I sat down next to Eponin, she had an expression on her face that told me something was up. "Okay... what?" I asked after a few more heartbeats passed. "You were making some rather interesting noises in your sleep. Kind of like... uhm..."
"Like I was getting laid?" I finished for her. "Yea... exactly like that." she admitted with a grin. "Well, Ep, you get married and you'll be dreaming like that too." I responded. She laughed at that. "Don't need to get married. I have those dreams all the time." "Yea, well, you get married and you get to make them come true." I arched an eyebrow as I finished the sentence. Eponin just lowered her head and shook it back and forth, a large smile on her face. "Marriage is good for you, Xena." "Keeps me out of trouble." I quipped. "I mean it... Gabrielle's been good for you." she said seriously. I wasn't prepared for this serious turn in the conversation and I wasn't sure how to respond. "Yea, well... she's an incredible girl." "You're probably the last woman I know who stills calls her that." Eponin commented. I thought about it a moment and agreed. Aside from Hecuba, Gabrielle's mother, I was probably the only woman around who thought of Brie that way. She was a grown woman, Queen to the Amazon Nation, yet part of me would always remember the young girl I met outside of Poteidaia. No matter what she will ever look like or how old we will grow, when I close my eyes I will still be able to picture the long blonde hair, blue peasant blouse, and dirty brown skirt. "I might add that the opposite is just as true. You've been good for Gabrielle as well." Eponin added. "Oh, yea, I'm sure getting kidnapped and having her life threatened
continually has done wonders for her." "You know what I mean. Gods, I remember when she first came to the village. She looked like a refugee from a camp somewhere. We all thought she was your--" She stopped abruptly. "I mean... it's just that the two of you..." "I know," I interrupted, "that's the way I wanted it. Hey, give a warrior a little credit for having a brain cell functioning... a pretty blonde virgin? There was no way I was letting any of you know she didn't belong to me." "And now she does." the Amazon stated. "Now she does." I repeated softly with a smile that I knew gave away what was in my heart. "Come on big tough warrior. Let's wake up Auto and get moving." Eponin rose and lifted her pack. "Hey, come on, I've got a reputation to think of." I joked. * * *
Once again I thought of my beautiful bard as we packed our meager supplies and pushed on, the memories of our lovemaking still fresh in my mind, even if it was in a dreamscape. The memory was the sweetest one I would be able to afford my wife for quite a while. "Apollo called her the Oracle of T an." I told them as we walked along the narrow path toward the bridge. I didn't sound pleased. Like it was any big surprise to anyone that I would enjoy confronting a prophet. It's not that I didn't respect true seers and oracles, it was that I wasn't a big fan of anyone telling me that my future
was going to go a certain way and there was nothing I could do about it. When I commanded an army, I watched as many of my men based the way that they fought, even the days they would fight, on a soothsayer's predictions. It usually turned out that they ended up getting their heads lopped off, not because of fate, but because they refused to believe they could command their own future. "We're supposed to pay a price to the Oracle before we can cross the bridge. Let's just hope that Hera's men didn't have the fee." I continued. "How much will it cost us for passage?" Autolycus asked. "Apollo would only tell me that whatever the Oracle asked, it would never be more than we had. I have a sneaky feeling he wasn't talking dinars, however." "Well we're about to find out." Autolycus chimed up as we rounded a large column of rocks. The rope bridge seemed sturdy enough from this distance. It was about thirty feet long and spanned the gap, high over the Black Lake, and there, in what looked almost like a throne, was the Oracle of T an. I knew it was the Oracle, but I had to admit that she looked wildly out of place. First of all a throne in the bowels of the earth was not something you saw everyday. Second, she was quite elderly, yet looked as regal as some dowager queen. "You are the Oracle of T an." I stated without question. "Very good Warrior Princess. Perhaps you should be an Oracle." she commented with a small smile. I sneered slightly in reply. "There is something about me you do not care for, warrior?" she asked me.
She worried me a tad. She was unlike any Oracle I ever met before and she had a sparkle in her eyes that looked strangely like amusement. "I don't much go in for fortune tellers." I replied. "That is because you do not care to know what your future holds, do you?" "I'd rather make my own future... I don't like relying on fate, or giving up control." I could see my two companions watching me out of the corners of my eyes. "Perhaps that's because you haven't yet learned the difference between your fate and your destiny." she responded. "And, the difference is?" I asked. "You can change your fate. Your whole life you were expected to take the left fork in the road, but when you arrive, suddenly you take the path to your right. In doing so you have changed the fate that awaited you." "And, my destiny?" "Your destiny was simply to be on the road in the first place." She leaned forward in her chair, her elbows resting on her thighs. "Try as you might, you cannot change your destiny, Xena." I was growing tired of her word games and was anxious for us to be on our way. "We need to cross the bridge. Apollo said there would be a price." I said shortly, my legendary patience already wearing thin. "Young people are in such a hurry, never time to talk with an old woman." the Oracle replied, shaking her head back and forth. I was about to reply, my tongue getting ready to throw a few barbs her way, when Eponin saved me from myself.
"Forgive us, Grandmother, but the quest that we are on is of the greatest importance. Hera's men may have already beaten us to the other side." "Ahh, Hera... she is nothing to me." The Oracle said with a wave of her hand. "She is a Goddess of considerable strength." Eponin stated the obvious. "She is a petulant child." The Oracle exclaimed and drew and unexpected smile from all of us. "Hera feels this world is hers and all those in it, her playthings. She has not seen all that I have seen, not traversed the universe as I. I was here long before the Gods decided to make this world their toy, when everything was quite new. My sisters and I have always been here, shaping the universe's fortune." She seemed to be lost in her own thoughts as she told us of her life. That's when I took a guess at who the Oracle's three sisters might be. "That's right, warrior... Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos." She responded to my unasked question. "The three fates." I explained to my companion's stares. "They're her sisters." "You are a quick one, warrior. Apollo's daughter chose well." she smiled. She unnerved me with that one. "Do we get to pass or not?" I responded brusquely. Again she lowered her head and shook it slightly. When she raised her eyes, her age suddenly manifested itself through her gray eyes. "So much strength and pride, Xena... if only you could reveal your heart, half as well as you control the physical world around you. You may pass to the other side. The price of your passage I demand from you." "How much?" I asked quickly. This woman was starting to freak me out and I wanted to put some distance between us.
"The price is your past and your future. Two questions will I ask of you and only if you answer honestly and listen to my words will I allow you safe passage." I didn't like what she was asking. Frankly, I didn't want to answer anything an Oracle might ask me... if they were a seer, shouldn't they already know the answers? "Hey, why don't you ask me... my life's an open scroll." Autolycus finally spoke from his spot to the left of me. Leave it to Auto... always trying to be gallant. The old woman laughed and suddenly her eyes were sparkling again. "Autolycus, you are indeed known to me, and in other circumstances, I would enjoy hearing about your amoral experiences, it would make my heart young again." Her face grew serious once more. "But, the payment I seek is from the warrior." she finished, looking at me. I folded my arms across my armored chest and looked at her, my lips raising into a sneer. "Allright," I hissed, "what do you want to know?" "Come here... take my hands. I want to see the truth of it in your eyes." she requested, but it felt more like an order and I bristled. I extended my hands and she took both of them in her own. I was rather amazed at how smooth her skin felt against my own worn and callused palms. "When you were a young girl, who was your best friend?" she asked. It was a strange question and I wasn't prepared for it. I thought about that for a few moments and thought of my brother. "My brother, Lyceus." I finally answered.
She seemed to think about that as she watched my eyes and I stared back, my blue gaze unwavering. "Do you love your Gabrielle?" "With all that I am." I shot back immediately. I didn't need to think about that one at all, the response was natural. The Oracle smiled at my reply and nodded her head. Then her brow furrowed and if I didn't know better I would say there were tears in her eyes. "Xena... a great sadness is going to come upon you." she began. All of a sudden I knew I didn't want to be here, in front of this woman, and I didn't want to hear what she had to say. I could feel my body going into fight mode and my eyes searched for a way to pass her by. I tried to move around her. I didn't want to hear that I was going to lose Gabrielle... how could this old woman be so cruel? "I don't want to hear this!" I rasped, trying to pull myself from her firm grasp. She held tightly to my wrists and I found that her frail appearance was deceiving. She easily held me solidly in place. There was nothing I could do but listen to her words. "Calm yourself, child. It's true that from this sadness will come a heartbreak that will be so great that you will wish for your own death. But, from this pain will come a miracle for you Xena... you will begin a new chapter in your life that will make you curse the day you thought to choose death over life." Without warning she released my hands and I pulled away fiercely. "You may pass," she said to all three of us, waving her arm. I moved first and didn't even look back to see if my companions followed me. I was unnerved by the Oracle's statement and all I could think about as we traversed the swinging bridge was how thoroughly empty my life would be without my bard in it.
* * *
I looked over the edge of the rope and peered down. The Black Lake was two or three hundred feet below us. It wasn't just dark because of lack of light. It was truly as black as ink. Having crossed the bridge we made our way across a ledge that seemed physically impossible to exist the way it did. We were walking across it, but it sure didn't seem to be attached to anything much for support. Perhaps a hundred feet ahead, the ledge fell away into an endless pattern of stairs. The steps were hewn from the cavern rock itself, making their way down to where I knew was the entrance to the Stone Palace. It took a while to make our way down. We were at a disadvantage, not knowing if Hera's soldiers waited at the bottom and we didn't want to announce our coming. The second reason we were going a little slow is that the steps had no rails of any kind between their surface and the depths below. It wasn't a problem for me, but my friend Autolycus, not usually afraid of heights, blanched a little at the task. It was hard to blame him. The air was close and muggy the lower we got, unusual for a cave, and it made breathing a bit more difficult. Plus water and erosion had done their part and some portions of the carved series of steps were tricky. We reached the halfway point and I remembered from Apollo's drawings that the rock ledge we now stood on was actually the top of the Stone Palace. We took a moment to prepare our weapons in case of a confrontation at the bottom and pressed on. Only about five hundred more steps, I thought to myself. Nearing the bottom, it surprised me that Hera's soldiers were making so much noise. As silently as possible we made it to the base, behind the huge stalagmites swelling from the ground. The large rock formation surrounded the Palace gates and effectively hid the three of us from the soldier's eyes. Crouching down I saw two men playing a dice game and six
others, leaning wearily against the Palace doors. They looked like a motley bunch, not up to Hera's usual standards. That's when I realized that if Hera was waging war against the other Olympians, then chances are she was suffering some losses too. Maybe these guys were just plain tired, or maybe they were simply replacements. Whatever the reason was, it was to our advantage. We moved closer, keeping low to stay covered by the rocks. Now, we could have charged them and easily won, but why expend the energy? I motioned to Autolycus and Ep, and pointed to the two men playing dice. They each quietly freed their crossbow. They would take care of those two, now the other six were my problem. I was working on the logistics of how to slit their throats with one chakram toss when I looked over their heads. Overhead, just above the Palace Doors hung a huge, narrow block of stone. Thick chains that disappeared into the palace, through the stone wall, suspended the slab of rock. The block of stone could apparently be lowered from the inside to block the doors of the Palace. Since it was on the outside and the doors opened in I could only surmise that it was to keep someone from getting out of the Palace, not to stop someone from getting in. I hoped that my chakram was up to it. I motioned for the others to wait and let the metal disc fly. It hit two rocks before settling itself between the two chains that held up the block of stone. It bounced rapidly back and forth between the heavy chain, cutting gouges into the strong metal. The sound of metal striking metal and the resulting groan as the slab of stone readjusted its weight, caused the six soldiers to look up. Just as they did, a few tons of granite came down on them. As that was happening, Autolycus and Eponin took out the dice players with an arrow apiece. "You know I thought we were trying to keep a low profile." Autolycus said, stepping over the large slab of stone. "Why do you think we used arrows?" "Yea, well, I like to keep my methods fresh." I answered and we pushed the heavy doors open.
Inside was a medium size foyer, two regular size doors just ahead of us. "It's probably locked." Autolycus said, pulling a lock pick from his pouch. "Ya think?" I responded sarcastically. "Here," Ep said, getting ready to kick the doors in. "What's with you two and these destructive tendencies?" Autolycus asked, pushing Eponin aside and getting down on one knee to examine the lock. "Ahh, Corinthian steel. These are some of the finest locks made in the Known World. Why the spring mechanism alone... look, let me just--" Ep and I rolled our eyes and took one look at each other. The silent message was passed and just as Auto bent to have a closer look at the metal lock, we each raised a leg and kicked hard against the solid wood. The door went swinging open, leaving the thief on his knees in front of the open passage. "Or," Autolycus drawled. "Don't sweat these, Auto," I reassured my friend. "The finesse part comes when we enter the maze." "A maze... well, doesn't that sound like fun." Eponin bantered. I didn't have time to explain to my companions, but they followed me without a word down the twisting castle halls until we stood in front of another door made of solid wood. I motioned for the both of them to stop behind me and, standing about three feet away from the doorway, I drew my sword. I stretched my arms forward and thrust the tip of my sword against the wooden door. I heard a faint click and suddenly a portion of the brick floor in front of me fell away to reveal a yawning hole leading into who knows where. "Think you can reach the lock from here?" I asked Autolycus. "Just stand back and watch the master." He replied.
Sure enough it took him less than ten heartbeats before the door swung open. We hopped over the trap door and into the next room. I stopped as we came to a wall with a long hall running to the left and to the right. I closed my eyes until I could see Apollo's map in my mind. Left, left, right, left, right, right, left, left... I had the sequence burned into my mind, so when Autolycus piped up with one of his usual quips, he got nothing but a hard glare from me. We walked carefully down the stone corridor, taking in every detail around us. I told my friends that Apollo instructed me on the traps and pitfalls that were a part of the Palace, but there was no way of knowing how many little snares Hera may have set up for us. I slowed down, staring at my feet, then stopped completely. I bent to one knee and scooped a bit of dirt and sand into my palm and tossed it into the middle of the corridor. The dirt revealed a thin filament, intricately tied into a grid-like pattern, the squares of the grid large enough to place my foot through. Eponin kneeled down beside me to get a closer look. "I've never seen anything so fine. It's like human hair." "You'd never even know you were running into it until it was too late." I said. I motioned them back a step and gave a slight tug to one of the strands of fiber. Immediately, small holes opened up an each side of the stone passageway, short arrows hissing from the openings. The feathered shafts hit the walls and fell harmlessly to the floor. I stood up and explained how we needed to cross the twenty feet of mined corridor. "Just remember to lift your foot up high enough to clear the line, the slightest pressure will spring the trap and there's a lot more arrows where these came from," I said, examining the shaft of one of the fallen darts. As I stood a smell that was a cross between rotting eggs and decaying
flesh assailed my nostrils. I looked to my right to find Autolycus suspiciously eyeing me. "Don't look at me." I drawled. "Then where is that coming--" I heard a shuffling noise behind us and we all three quickly turned, swords drawn. "What in Hades are those?" Eponin said as disgust filled her voice. "Xena, please tell me those are not giant rats underneath that armor." Autolycus said and I heard the fear in his voice too. "Skaven." I hissed. There were at least six of them; they never traveled alone. They were in every way like their four-footed brethren, quick, vicious, and cunning. These creatures weren't your everyday big rats with beady eyes and long wormlike tails, though. These creatures were bipedal man-sized killing machines. My one and only encounter with them was when Hera sent a few of them after me when I was in a castle a lot like this one. I was after the sword Hercules and I eventually used to free Prometheus and I rounded a corner and found these guys staring at me. I found, that on their own, they were ill-disciplined and complete cowards, but together, in large packs, they become fanatically over-confident and bold. They wore filthy rags and scraps of armor, some brandishing crude weapons and others with more sophisticated gear. On everything, helmets, shields, or shoulder armor, they painted their standard, the Great Horned Rat, the dark god of the Skaven. So, I attempted to do now what I did back then. "Turn around and start moving... carefully, and when I say run, you better be able to high step or you'll end up full of arrows." I said in a low voice. "I'll
keep them busy for as long as I can." I didn't fully have it in my mind what I was going to do yet, but I sure hoped it would come to me. My companions turned, slowly at first and began to maneuver through the trap. The Skaven hissed and sniffed the air at our movement. Two of them rushed forward in a false charge to see if I'd cower in fear. I did just the opposite. I twirled my word with a flip of my wrist and started screaming at the top of my lungs. It scared the shit out of them, which was evident by the floor around them. There was only one major flaw in my plan. Skaven don't like to be afraid. It unnerves them to the point that they'll do the last thing you could think of. In this case that meant charging right at me. They were in an absolute frenzy now and I didn't want to be anywhere close to those rabid fangs. I turned around to see my friends were almost there. "Run!" I shouted and took my own advice. It only took a heartbeat and they were nearly on top of me. I could hear them chittering and feel their hot breath on my neck. If one of them had been smart enough to reach out a paw, he could have dragged me to the ground. Actually, I was surprised the smell alone didn't knock me out. I figured that since they were right on my back I'd see if I had any of Apollo's infused power left. I saw that Auto finally cleared the trap and when Eponin saw me barreling down the corridor, she dove the remaining few feet. I ran through that passageway like my life depended on it, which it did. I never bothered with trying to avoid the hair-like filaments; I just barreled on through, setting off the traps. The arrows made a sharp hissing sound as they passed me, but I twisted, turned, and dodged until I skidded to a stop in front of my friends who were still standing there, a look of open-mouthed wonder on their faces. I turned around and all six of the hideous creatures were riddled with arrows, breathing their last. One other thing about Skaven... they're not notoriously bright.
* * *
Two more lefts and a right and we found a secure room where we could take a break. Apollo said it was a storage room for the priests. We found it mostly empty, a number of baskets and other paraphernalia lined up against one wall. I closed and bolted the door; it was the only way in and out, according to my father in law. We sat and caught our breath, eating some dry rations; the only sound was our own breathing. I heard a sound outside the bolted door that caused the skin at the nape of my neck to prickle. It was a Gods awful racket like a man half-yelling, half moaning in agony. Whatever it was, it was from Hera's back of tricks. Either that or Apollo forgot to tell me something. Suddenly something crashed against the locked door... something big. The pounding continued as I realized we were trapped in here with no other way out. Whatever it was, we were going to have to confront it to escape. The hinges on the door began to rip apart and finally chunks of the wooden door flew to bits. When the door was flung into the room what stood in the entrance was the most powerful looking warrior I'd ever seen, and believe me, I've gone up against the biggest and the baddest. He came straight for me, no preamble, no "I'm gonna kill you, Xena." He was making a ghostly moaning sound that could only mean he was a Beserker. Once men, they were trapped within their armor, usually by Gods or sorcerers. They, like the Skaven we just encountered knew only one thing, how to destroy your enemy. They never slept or ate, and never got tired. They simply fought until they were killed or killed you. Killing a Beserker was a challenge in itself. This one had on massive amounts of black and white armor over a coat of chain mail. His gloved hands came down into gauntlets that were all hard leather and metal. Over his boots and up to his thighs was the same leather and metal combination. His face was covered completely in a metal helmet, a long slit cut into the device for him to see through. In the very top of the helmet
was a sharp curved spike the color of bone, covered in dried blood from some other unfortunate victim. I met his charge against my blade with my own battle cry. Soon I was in full fight mode and could only hear my own blood pounding in my ears as instinct took over. I could occasionally feel myself grunting or shouting as I wielded my blade, but for the most part I was lost inside the part of me that is a warrior. Nothing existed for me beyond those boundaries. Unfortunately, even with Apollo's strength, I was not a Beserker and I began to tire. That's when I came to an awareness of my companions. Eponin and Autolycus both entered the fray with their swords, but even with three of us combining our strength, the creature could not be brought down. Finally, he tossed his sword aside and pulled what looked like a huge sledgehammer that he was carrying on his back. The wooden-handled hammer was a big thick block of metal at its head with spikes sticking out of it. He swung the weapon in a wide arc, fending off our blows with a large round shield held securely in his other hand. Stepping back to catch my breath, my companions charged in to give me a moment. It was then that I saw the area I needed to attack. The Beserker's gauntlet came almost to his armored elbow protector, but there was a gap of two or three inches between the elbow protector and where his shoulder armor came down onto his upper arm. It was just about the only unprotected area on his body. Eponin was slammed against the wall, the spikes from the creature's hammer slicing open a thick cut on her arm. I stepped in front of the fallen Amazon to try to draw the creature's attention away, but he smelled blood now. That turned out to my advantage because while he was totally focused on the fallen warrior I stepped in. I would only have one chance and the timing had to be perfect. The only time the gap in his armor showed was when his arms were raised. I waited until he brought his weapon hand up, to finish off Eponin, then I saw it. I raise my sword and with all my strength, brought it down, just as his arm was striking downward in the Amazon's direction.
I could feel the difference in texture immediately. Instead of striking hammered metal, my sword felt like it was slicing through a soft melon. The howl the creature let loose made my ears ring as my blade sliced the arm from his body. Still he wouldn't quit fighting and I knew he wouldn't until he was dead. Autolycus and I took turns harassing him and he swung at us with the shield in his remaining arm. Seeing an opening, I severed his other arm just as I had the first. I kicked him in the chest and he toppled to the floor. I moved to Eponin who had already staunched the flow of blood from her arm with a tourniquet. The wound was wide, but not nearly as deep as I first thought. "I'll sew it up for you as soon as we get out of here." I said and she nodded as I pulled a clean cloth from my pack to put around it in the meantime. The Beserker was still moaning and howling on the floor, but without his arms he couldn't go anywhere. The loss of blood was finally causing him to grow weaker and he lay there panting. Autolycus went near him and I could see the kind-hearted thief was going to try to get the creature's helmet off, in an attempt to help him breath. "Don't touch him." I said quickly and Auto jumped back like he was just exposed to swamp fever. "If you remove a Beserker's helmet and look into his face, you end up condemned to take on his fate. You trade places with him." I said, which caused Auto to back up even further. "Are we just gonna leave him like that?" Eponin asked. "Beserker's were once warrior's just like you and I." I explained, wrapping the clean bandage around her arm. "Then one day they gave in to the seduction of a God or a sorcerer. The promise of power and strength that would be theirs forever was what turned this one into what you see now. They have no recollection of their previous lives, they only know of death and conquest."
I looked over at the fallen creature as I spoke and knew that it was taking its last breaths. "He made his choice. He'll have to see it to the end." I answered. We helped Ep to her feet and she told us she was fine. We left through the destroyed doorway and I realized that Hera was playing for keeps this time and I wondered how long our strength and our luck would hold out. * * *
All three of us were in need of a little sleep and some warm food, even myself, yet we pushed on through the semi-dark corridors of the Stone Palace. I could feel the very slight downward slope that the passageway had and whether my companions realized or not, we were descending lower with every step. Ultimately, by the time we reached the Diamond Chamber we would be fifteen levels further below where we entered the Stone Palace. I heard footfalls behind us, obviously not someone trying to cover the sound from us. Actually, it sounded like they were trying to keep quiet, but they were failing miserably. "Keep moving," I said to my friends as we rounded the next corner. I flattened myself against the wall and waited as Ep and Autolycus moved on. The stranger's footsteps grew nearer and just when they were about to round the corner, I reached out and grabbed the man's collar. He wore priest robes and carried no weapons. By the time my two companions heard the noise and rushed back, the priest was on his knees after I'd interrupted the flow of blood to his brain. "Who are you?" I questioned and he struggled to speak. "T-The... strength of... Apollo... f-flows in y-you." he gasped.
I quickly recognized the safe phrase Apollo gave me and released the pinch from the terrified priest. He fell to the floor, sucking in great gulps of air. My father in law told me that any priests that were loyal to him might aid us along the way. He gave me this phrase as a way I might be able to recognize them from any that were turned to Hera's cause. I helped the man to his feet and apologized, but we needed to be sure. He bowed slightly at all of us. "I have been told to bring you to a safe place where you may rest for a time." He said. "The Trias?" I asked. "Yes... you will follow me?" I looked at Ep and Autolycus and indicated that we should follow the priest. The Trias was one of the two places in the Stone Palace where immortals could not go. Well, they could but Apollo's exact words were that they would be, "rendered powerless." I knew we'd be safe there. With a wave of my arm, I bid the priest lead us. I knew round about where the Trias was according to Apollo's map, but only the priests knew the secret passageways into the sacred temple. Even Apollo himself was not privy to this mortal shrine in his honor. Delos was set up this way by Apollo himself to protect the Elixir of Life from just the sort of thing we were going through now. Lying in a soft palette, a warm stew filling my belly, I thought I could sleep for a week. I knew the half a dozen candlemarks we agreed on would be more than enough, however. After we ate and I stitched Eponin's arm, we were each shown to a separate room, probably one of the many priest's quarters. A steaming tub of warm water awaited me and I reveled in its soothing heat, thinking that I was getting far too old for all of this. Now, nearing sleep, I remembered the last time I was in a temple that belonged to Apollo. How strange to revisit that memory and know that now
Gabrielle was the God's daughter. I was so in love with her then. If I could have known then that I was to lose my bard when she tried to bring Hope to her death, just a few moons later, I would have surely told her what was in my heart.
Keeping my wife and Tara apart was a little tricky since Tara was convinced she would be my next partner. If only the girl understood what Gabrielle really meant to me. Tara later admitted that she initially thought Gabrielle was merely my body slave, a girl that I kept around to meet my physical needs. I almost laughed out loud when I heard that. Seems most of Greece thought that about Brie. Someday I'll have to ask her if she knew that. I set the youngster straight, and told her that Gabrielle and I were just friends. She looked rather like she didn't know whether she should believe me or not. I remember trying to stay in between the two of them. I loved Gabrielle and no one could have ever come between us, but I saw something in Tara. It was like looking at a younger version of myself. I knew, right off, that bad girl image was a lot of bluster on her part. The first night we spent together, when Tara sidled herself up to my bedroll in Gabrielle's usual spot, I was in a fix. I didn't want to make too much of it for fear my bard would think I was getting a bit too possessive and wonder why her best friend simply had to sleep by her. So, I blew it off and Gabrielle settled further away from me than usual and the loss I felt at the mere few feet was immediate. I was just losing myself to sleep when I felt the small hand on my thigh. I don't think I knew what was going on right away, since my sleep fogged brain was trying to register the fact that Gabrielle usually slept beside me and sliding her hand up the inside of my thigh was certainly not one of the things my bard usually did. Then the fingers on that hand began to slide under my breeches and my eyes shot open as sudden realization flooded over me. I grabbed Tara's wrist and, without a sound, I gently pushed her hand
away from me. I could already hear Gabrielle's deep, even breathing telling me she was asleep, thank the Gods. I felt the young girl's insistent hand return and this time I roughly stopped her wandering fingers and leaned up on one elbow, glaring down at her. "Stop!" I hissed quietly, trying not to wake Gabrielle. "But, you said you two were just friends." Tara whispered in response to my glance over at Gabrielle's bedroll. "It doesn't matter, Tara." I replied, and suddenly I wanted to be honest with the girl. "Gabrielle holds my heart and this would be a betrayal of that affection. "Doesn't she even know... I mean, that you love her?" "No, and I would rather keep it that way for now. Tara, someday I hope you find someone that will open their heart and be willing to forgive all the wrong things that you've done in your past. Someone that will love you no matter what you've done or who you've been. Gabrielle is that person for me and I will never again do anything to jeopardize that love." I finished. "I'm trusting you with this knowledge, Tara, I hope you won't let me down." I finished. "I won't, Xena." Tara said finally, turning over to sleep. Of course, I should have known that Tara was too immature to process what I told her that night. She proceeded to push Gabrielle, in her jealousy over me, until my wife had no choice left but to pummel some sense into the girl. It was an act filled with an odd, almost bizarre satisfaction from all parties concerned. Tara found out that she wasn't so bad after all and that just because a person was long-suffering and tolerant, it didn't mean they were weak. Gabrielle learned that some heads are hard, but that doesn't necessarily mean they are a lost cause. Then there was me.
Once we returned the Urn of Apollo to the temple, Tara and Gabrielle stayed for the cleansing ceremony. I heard Tara's question to Gabrielle loud and clear. "Doesn't she want to be forgiven?" she asked. My bard simply turned and looked at me. She alone knew the thoughts that ran through my head. I would not, could not allow myself forgiveness. I was determined to earn my place in Ellysia by trying to atone for every life I took. Nothing could bring back those people from my past and no amount of forgiveness could absolve me from the shame and the guilt. I would give back one day at a time until Hades came for me. My words to Tara reminded me that forgiveness for my crimes against humanity would have to come from Hades himself at the end of my time in the mortal realm, all other forgiveness I received from my bard. Through trial and tribulation, she forgave me all my past misdeeds. How did I know this to be so? Because she told me so everyday, in a thousand little ways. There would never be any need for another's forgiveness... I had Gabrielle. * * *
My internal clock woke me just shy of the time we were to wake. The priests fed us a morning breakfast of bread and cheese, although it only felt like morning since I slept uninterrupted for six candlemarks. In truth I had about lost track of whether it was night or day in the world above us. I sat inside the temple, a most interesting place, architecturally speaking. The Trias was set up with three altars, for reasons I hadn't yet learned from Apollo. He said it was a place of great strength and that the three altars
were aligned so that they literally drew energy from the forces of nature. Because of this, the priests explained to me that it was a place with great healing powers. "Xena..." Eponin came into the room, "you have got to see this," she said. She removed the bandage from her arm and showed me the thin line of stitches I put in earlier. Underneath the suture line the skin was completely healed. I pulled my breast dagger out and cut away the light twine I used to hold her wound together. "Well, Ep, it looks like you're living proof of the power of this place." "Now we know why they keep it such a well guarded secret." She responded, still amazed at her body's miraculous ability to heal within the confines of the temple. Autolycus entered the room we sat in, rubbing his shoulder and stretching his back. "I didn't even know I had this many muscles that could ache." He said. I chuckled at my friend and realized that life's little everyday pains must not be on a grand enough scale for the Trias to play a part in healing. We munched on our food and spoke with a few of the priests, but they couldn't give me much more information than I already knew. I explained the rest of our journey, drawing some simple sketches on a piece of parchment one of the priests gave to me. The rest of the maze turned into a spiral, circling down, lower and lower until we would enter the Great Hall. Across from the Great Hall lay the Diamond Chamber. "Look, what we've experienced so far has just been a taste of what Hera can throw at us," I began. "Actually, a lot depends on how the battle on Olympus is going. If Hera's is busy enough, she may lose track of us. Even better would be if the battle is going badly for her, then she may ignore us completely." "But, we can't depend on that, right?" Autolycus stated.
"Right. We have to plan for the worst, though. That's why if either of you want to stay here with the priests until this thing is over with, I'll understand." I added. They both looked at each other, then at me. "I think you know what my answer is, Xena. I'm here for my people and if I have to die to prove my worth to Artemis, then so be it." Eponin responded. Autolycus had his head lowered and when he raised his eyes to mine I could see that there was no jest in them. "Xena, this just isn't about Gabrielle or even the Amazons anymore. It's about all of us... humanity. Hey, I'm the first guy to admit that there are a few unsavory types that I could do without, but I don't think we should all get dumped on because of it." he finished with a grin. "Allright then... let's get on with it." I replied, standing up and shouldering my pack. * * *
The priest that originally led us to the Trias again led us out through hidden, twisting and turning passageways. He never gave his name and so I respected his silence. He explained where we would end up and I was happy to know that we would be avoiding the level where Apollo said they kept the Serpent of the Undead. Now, I am no coward, but I was in no hurry to confront anything with a name even remotely similar to that. Apollo tried to ease my worries by saying the serpent was nothing compared to what followed him around. I took a moment after the priest left us to get my bearings. Two, maybe three candlemarks passed as we walked in silence, carefully avoiding the traps that were in place. It seemed like there was a door every ten feet and
Autolycus was sure doing his part with his trusty lock pick. The corridor started widening and soon we were walking through passageways nearly forty feet across. I realized, noticing the numerous doors that lined the corridor's walls, had we not had Apollo's instructions, we could have wandered this castle for years. I knew which doors to take, however and we plodded along, anticipation increasing the closer we got to the Great Hall. A familiar odor wafted through the corridors to engulf us and I begin searching the passageway with my eyes, trying to figure out which door would make a good direction for a hasty exit. "Do not tell me it's the rats again." Autolycus stated. I wasn't sure, but for the smell to be that powerful this far away; it would have to be a whole platoon of Skaven. If that was the case, we didn't stand a chance. The roar we heard coming from the passage ahead caused me to freeze in my tracks. A moment of panic, something I am unaccustomed to feeling on a routine basis, clutched at me. Had I turned the wrong way somewhere? Apollo warned me that the Serpent of the Undead had an ear splitting roar that could cause an otherwise fearless warrior to cringe in fear. We were not supposed to be on this level, had the priest lied? My brain searched for these answers in the few heartbeats that passed before we saw the huge beast shuffling toward us. "By--the--Gods!" Eponin enunciated each word severely. "Oh, this can't be good." Autolycus responded to the approaching serpent. I drew my sword, mentally going through the items Apollo loaded in my pack, wondering if one of them was meant for this creature. Well, nothing was coming to me so I drew my sword and headed toward the beast. It was a sickly, rotting green color; it's skin hanging off its body in tatters, completely exposing the bone in some places. When he attempted to roar again a portion of his lower jaw simply fell off. The thing was big and lumbered along slowly, causing me some concern at what would back this
thing up. "Careful, keep your eyes open. Apollo said something worse backs this thing up." I shouted over the monster's din. "Worse? Worse than an undead dragon?!?" Autolycus shouted, his voice raising an octave. "It's dead, how dangerous can it be?" I responded and immediately moved forward to cut a deep gash in the monster's belly. Now, I'm a seasoned warrior. I've seen sick horrible things, watched them happen, Hades, I've done some of them myself, but never have I ever felt as sickened as when I stepped back from the rush of, Gods know what, that spilled from that creatures belly. A mixture of maggots, worms, and black beetles poured from the wound, followed by the thumps of human body parts as they hit the ground. Autolycus promptly turned around and threw up his breakfast. As disgusting as this mass of unliving flesh was, it wasn't much of a threat. It snapped it's jaws, but bits of him kept dropping off all over the place. Along his long neck, the skin had fallen away, revealing some loose bits of muscle. What was most prominent was the cream color of the two lengths of vertebrae than ran to the dragon's head. I stepped in and with one strong blow I severed the creatures head. Of course, that didn't stop him, he was already dead after all. The beast's body still flailed about, huge wings flapping, trying to impale one of us with the large claws on the end of each joint of his tattered wings. Eponin thought quickly and, removing her crossbow from her back, she notched an arrow and let it fly. I was about to shout a warning that it would do no good to fill it with arrows when I saw where the first shaft struck the creature. Eponin shot it's wing, just as the animal was raising the limb and the appendage was pinned to the wall, as the Amazon's arrow was imbedded into the mortar. Autolycus took the warrior's lead and let fly with his own arrows. Another few heartbeats and they succeeded in pinning the animal to the wall, at least enough for us to pass.
Auto and I went closer to examine the beast. "Well, when Hera wants ya dead she sure doesn't skimp, does she?" Auto deadpanned. I realized then that it wasn't I who made a mistake. We were in exactly the spot I thought we were. "Somehow, Hera let this thing loose on this level. I guess that means she's here... and she's not happy." I said aloud. "So, why doesn't she just nail us herself, and I thought you said the Gods didn't have powers down here?" Auto asked. "First of all it's that direct intervention thing. Zeus prohibits Hera from interfering directly in the lives of humans. Her answer is to kill us or slow us down with these things." I kicked some of the still crawling bugs from my boots. "And, the Gods do have their powers down here, but they're limited. I would probably be on equal terms when it came to fighting them, but I seriously doubt Hera's going to challenge me one on one down here. There are only two places the Gods can't go down here... or two that I know of, the Trias and the Diamond Chamber. Actually, they lose all their powers if they enter one of those places." I felt an odd warmth against the back of my neck and a drop of wetness struck my shoulder armor. When I turned my head slightly I was looking into the face of a salivating hydra. I grabbed Autolycus and we dove just as two sets of jaws snapped into the air where we had been standing. We all drew our swords and carefully prepared to fight off the advancing five heads. Long and low to the ground its body appeared to be like a big lizard. Well-muscled and protected by heavy scales a few of the creature's heads turned toward the still bound dragon and sniffed the beast. It used one of its short legs to push at the dragon as if it were an injured pet. That's when it turned and headed in our direction. If it was possible for a hydra to look pissed, then this one definitely was.
"Remember to ask me on this kind of adventure again, Xena... it just keeps getting better and better." Autolycus quipped. I got ready to see how many of the heads I could take off with my chakram, but the problem with a hydra was unless you cut all five heads off at once, they would grow back. I remembered my pack and Apollo's words. I would know when I needed them. I fell back to where it lay on the ground and grabbed for it while Eponin and Auto distracted the hydra. Feeling the smooth metal I pulled out a disk that looked suspiciously like my chakram. It had five layers to it, which seemed perfect for this little problem, but I wondered if it was meant to act like a chakram. Well, if it looks like a chakram, feels like a chakram... I used all my strength, and some that Apollo gave me, to fling the object in the hydra's direction. The metal object split apart into five separate disks, just before slicing through each one of the five necks that reached for us. The beast writhed for a moment and then was still. We were all breathing hard and I suspect it was more from adrenaline than actual exertion. Leave it to Autolycus to break the silence. "I just want to know one thing... how come you get all the cool toys?" I laughed so hard tears came to my eyes. * * *
We again made our way into the depths of the Stone Palace, traveling for what seemed like candlemarks. Thank the Gods, we didn't run into anymore of Hera's little monsters, but I didn't want to let down my guard in case she planned it that way. More likely than not the other Olympians were giving her more than she could handle up on Olympus. We stopped to rest our legs for a while and to share some of the water the priests filled our skins with. I sat on the ground, my back situated against
the wall, my eyes closed as I rested. The musty smell of the Palace and the caves reminded me of another time. I lost Gabrielle to death more than once during our travels together, but by far the pain I remember the most was that day in a bombed out temple in Thessaly. The musty smell of the Stone Palace reminded me of the temple we chose to take refuge in. It took me so by surprise, Gabrielle dying that day. That wasn't supposed to happen... couldn't happen... not to my Gabrielle. When those around me told me to ease up, to let her pass over to the other side, I was in shock. There are no words to describe what I was feeling, mostly because I didn't take the time to examine my own feelings. I only know that I absolutely refused to let Gabrielle leave me. I acted on instinct alone and my sole reaction was anger. I was angry with the Gods for stealing away the young woman that I knew I was in love with even back then. We had only been traveling together for just under a season, yet I already knew there was something different about this girl, something that would save me. I grew angry with myself for a hundred different reasons. It was my fault we were there in the first place; I led the woman I cared for; who depended on me, right into the arms of danger. My damnable pride led us into again, yet I should have been thinking more of Gabrielle than my own abilities. I was angry because I never told Gabrielle of my feelings for her, and because I wasn't able to save her from death. Lastly, I was angry with Gabrielle. She had no business going out into the battle zone; she should have known her own limitations. Mostly I was angry with my beautiful bard because she died. She had the audacity to die, to die on me... I was the Warrior Princess for Goddess sake! I didn't say any of these feelings of anger would make sense or were in the least rational, but it's all I can remember going through my mind at the time. To tell the truth I didn't even remember half the things I said until, in privacy, I asked Ephiny to go over it with me.
"She is not dead... I wouldn't let her. Come on, Gabrielle, wake up. Come on, wake up. Come on, wake up. You're scaring me. Wake up. Wake up. Gabrielle, breathe. Come on. Come on, breathe, breathe. Maybe she
just needs air. I need to get some air in her lungs. Come on, breathe!" "No. No... Come on, Gabrielle. Come on. Come on. Don't leave me. Don't you leave me! Don't leave me! Don't leave me! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!" Funny, but she never asked why or looked like I was asking her anything odd at all. I think she always knew how I felt about Gabrielle and I'm sure she suspected why I asked her. There are very few times in my life that I have truly "lost it," been so whacked out that I couldn't remember all my actions. Up until that day, when I lost Gabrielle on that altar, the last time it happened was when I became a true killer. It was the day M'lila was killed and I swore I would kill Caesar... kill all Rome to balance the scales. What got me through the incident with Gabrielle in Thessaly was the time we spent together after, once her body began to heal. I was ecstatic that my bard was alive and I should have shown her how much, but what did I do? I ran off and hid. For days I helped the villagers rebuild and played healer until I dropped down at night next to Gabrielle's pallet exhausted, falling instantly into a deep slumber. I was guilty and wondered if Gabrielle blamed me, but I was also ashamed at myself for failing to protect her. Finally she caught me one night and, like always, Gabrielle had to speak up first.
I wandered down to the small lake beyond the temple and took a real bath. My skin and hair hadn't seen soap in a while and when I was through I was so clean I almost squeaked. I returned to the temple clad only in my leathers, still toweling dry my damp hair. I found a comfortable spot in one corner of the temple earlier on for Gabrielle and constructed a palette so she wouldn't have to lie on the floor. I fastened one of our blankets up as a makeshift wall and my bard was able to rest and enjoy a slight bit of privacy. Hippocrates stopped me on my way in and pushed a bowl of warm stew into my hands, saying something about not taking care of myself. I had to admit I was a little lost in that arena. Gabrielle usually took care of me
in those little ways. I eased my tired body down onto the blanket on the floor beside Gabrielle's pallet. I just settled down when I heard my bard begin to moan as if in pain. It wasn't a sharp cry, but Gabrielle's body tossed back and forth restlessly, small sounds of discomfort coming from her throat. I knelt beside the bed and raised a hand, brushing back the hair from her face. "Gabrielle? Gabrielle, are you allright?" "Xena? I'm sorry I guess I just hurt." "I know, your body's not used to being so banged up. Let me fix you something." I stood and rushed off, but it didn't take me long to fix some willow bark tea with a pinch of painkiller. When I returned Gabrielle was awake, leaning up on one elbow. She looked uncomfortable as all get out and considering what happened to her in the last few days it was no wonder. "Here, drink this, it will take the edge off your aches and pains." I wrapped her fingers around the warm mug and she just continued to look at me, not yet taking a drink. "Xena... would you sit up here with me?" "I didn't make that pallet for a warrior, Gabrielle, I made it bard sized." I returned lightly, trying not to meet her eyes. "Please?" Gabrielle pleaded. When I looked up I was trapped. The combination of soulful green eyes displaying a combination of trepidation and pain and the plea from her voice. I simply couldn't refuse. "Move forward a little." I said, moving to sit at the head of the pallet. I stretched one long leg on the pallet and one foot remained flatly on the
floor. I eased Gabrielle's sore body so she was sitting between my legs, her back resting against my chest. "How's that?" I asked, knowing it felt like Ellysia to me. "Much, much better, thanks. Xena?" "Sshh... drink your tea first." I ordered gently. I wasn't sure I was ready for what Gabrielle wanted to say. My bard finished the warm drink and I placed the mug on the floor. There was continued silence and I thought that Gabrielle might have dropped off to sleep. "Xena?" Gabrielle whispered my name, "Hhmm?" "I'm glad you brought me back," was all she said. "It was you that came back," I answered as I brushed my fingers through her honey colored hair. Gabrielle leaned her head back and rested it on my shoulder so I continued to stroke her hair and face. "I'll bet you would have rather woken up in Ellysia than still here with this old warrior." "Don't say that... I came back because of you. I love you, Xena." Gabrielle responded and the words rendered me speechless. Gabrielle meant that she loved me as a friend and a piece of my heart broke, longing for more, but most of my heart was flying high. Even as a friend... she loves me. After all we go through, all that she knows I've done... and still. "I love you too, Gabrielle." I surprised myself by saying, with a catch in my voice. We just lay there together after that. I continued to stroke my friend's face
and hair, running a gentle hand along her bruised arm. I could feel Gabrielle snuggle into my body further and I wrapped my arms around her tighter and held her. "Does this warrior pillow feel better than a hard pallet?" I teased with a whisper. Gabrielle chuckled and I felt her head nod. I kissed the back of her hair and held her, moving very slightly in a rocking motion. I began to hum softly into her ear and the combination of all of this, plus the effects of the tea, soon had my bard sleeping peacefully. I suppose I could have removed myself from the pallet. Certainly the painkiller would allow Gabrielle to sleep through the night, but I had no wish to be anywhere else in the world. This was my best friend and she loved me enough to postpone Ellysia to be with me. I held the bard closer and knew that whatever the two of us would encounter in our future, we would always be best friends. I jerked awake at the sound of boots next to me. Eponin was rising and stretching her back. "Ready?" She asked. I nodded, realizing that I hadn't been asleep long, just enough to dream of my bard. As I stood and stretched, working the stiffness out, I thought about how much my wife always sacrificed for me. Starting down the corridor once again I wondered if Gabrielle would have enough strength to forgo Ellysia for me one more time. * * *
We prepared ourselves for the final leg of our journey. We were now on the
fifteenth and lowest level of the Stone Palace. Walking along the wide corridor I felt my apprehension grow waiting for Hera's next move. It was a bit unsettling not to know whether there would be an attack or whether she had her hands already full on Olympus. I didn't need to think along those lines for long, though. When we rounded the next corner we ran right into our friends with the flashy armor. There wasn't much time to think of anything beyond staying alive. The soldiers outnumbered us three to one, but each of us fought our hardest. "Ayah." I grunted, my blade slicing into another soldier. Each time I killed or incapacitated one of Hera's soldiers it seemed that another came in quickly to take his place. I'd been in bloodier battles against more dangerous foes than this, so I acted on instinct alone. Cutting…stabbing…punching…another soldier came at me and I parried his first blow, kicking out behind me like a mule to take out a sneak attack. My battle cry rang out and the more I fought, the less aware I became of my surroundings. The blade in my hand and the opponent before me became the only things I could focus on. My brain absolutely refused to focus on anything else. Perhaps that was why I lost track of Eponin and Autolycus so easily. I looked up for a fraction of a moment and Eponin and Autolycus were fighting side by side, suddenly the floor opened up as they backed onto a trap door and both of my companions went sliding out of sight. "Noooo!" I heard myself scream, which only brought more soldiers my way. I was quickly becoming outnumbered as soldier after soldier charged to take a chance against my blade. More often than not he found himself impaled against it, but they were coming closer and closer to taking my head. I backed off further down the corridor, and then with a cry and a front flip, I sailed over their heads. Before they had time to turn around, I kicked in the only door available and rushed through. Fate was with me, a large gate lock hung above the door. I jumped up and slid the wooden bar in place. The door held securely as the soldiers on the other side pounded a
few times then gave up. I thought that a little curious until I heard her voice. "Hello, Xena…how good of you to join me." I cursed my own lack of foresight to have fallen for her trick. I let myself be herded exactly where she wanted me. I turned and put a look of casual defiance on my face, realizing that I stood in the Great Hall. "Hello, Hera." I answered. * * *
"Now, there are two ways to do everything, Xena--" "Yea, yea…the easy way and the hard way, yadda, yadda. Get on with it." "You should take care with that tongue of yours warrior, it's liable to get your throat slit." Hera hissed back at me. "Hera, let's not fool ourselves. If you wanted me dead I'd already be that way…not that you haven't tried since I've been on this little holiday. You obviously need me for something, so let's cut to the chase, shall we?" I replied. Her plastered on smile disappeared and her demeanor became a little less intimidating. I kept looking around the huge empty hall, but saw no one beyond the Goddess and myself. I felt that weird nagging feeling that something was wrong, though. It was that tingling that I get down my spine, when the bad guys are just around the corner. Carefully scrutinizing the expansive room with its high stone walls, I could see nothing out of the ordinary so I returned my focus to the Goddess. Hera sat, in what appeared to be, a makeshift throne of some sort, her elbows resting on the arms of the chair and the fingertips of each hand lightly tapping together. "Allright, Xena... let's talk, shall we? There is something I want, but as much
as it pains me to say it, I need your help to get it." Hera finished, her pale eyes watching every move I made. "Keep talking, Hera, but if you ask me to get the Elixir of Life for you the answer will be one you won't want to hear." I replied coyly. "I could make it worth your while, warrior." "Hah. What could you possibly offer me that would make me turn my back on the rest of humanity?" I questioned. "Gabrielle's life." She said easily and I knew that she read my mind before I could attempt to hide my thoughts. "What makes you think I could even do such a thing, trade Gabrielle's life for the lives of every single man and woman in this world?" "Xena," she smiled, and I didn't like the smug attitude she displayed. "That's probably the most ridiculous question you've ever asked of anyone. Even if I couldn't read your thoughts, it doesn't take a seer to know that you would do absolutely anything to ensure your young Queen's health." I became more careful and quickly slid a mask down over my thoughts. "How would you save Gabrielle without healing Artemis?" I asked. "All it takes is one drop of the Elixir. Gabrielle would be healed and you could go your own way." "With the rest of humanity dead?" I stated more than asked. "Oh, I'm sure we can come to some kind of arrangement..." she trailed off. She thought she had me over a barrel and in a way she did. I would do anything for Gabrielle, go anywhere, face any foe, but there is one thing that I would never do and that is to place Gabrielle in a situation like that. If I saved Gabrielle's life at the cost of the lives of, not just the people we love and care about, but the lives of every other human, what kind of life would
she have? It would be an existence filled with pain and incredible emptiness. I loved my wife more than my own life, surely, but I would have to say goodbye and hope to meet her in the Fields if this was to be our only choice. I know Gabrielle would not only applaud my decision, she would love me all the more for it. "No deal, Hera. Not now, not ever... the cost is too high." I answered, realizing that if she had her full powers down here she would have used them by now. She stood up so fast she almost knocked the makeshift throne backward. It took her a moment to calm herself, I could see she just wanted to blast me with a fireball right then and there. Finally, she smiled, and that worried me more than anything. "You are a fool Xena. We shall see how quickly you change your mind once you see Gabrielle's life wane slowly and painfully away. Trust me, I'm sure I can get you to change your mind." she finished. "You and what army?" I snorted. "Well, it's rather amusing that you put it like that..." the Goddess motioned into the air with one of her hands I raised my sword, which I hadn't yet placed back in its scabbard. I turned in a complete circle, and didn't immediately see anyone, but that sense I had was raising the hairs on the back of my neck. Suddenly, my eyes widened in surprise, as the walls seemed to come alive. I think I even shook my head a little to shake the odd hallucination from my field of vision. Unfortunately, Hera has played me again and once more I find myself cursing the fact that I am only mortal. Hera's immortal army stepped away from the walls; their armor painted the same color, in the same stone design. When they were pressed up against the walls their armor blended so well that I couldn't tell that there were even beings standing there. Now, I had a hundred swords pointed in my direction just waiting to plunge
themselves into my body. I ground my teeth together and tried to be smart, which isn't always in my nature. I am a warrior by nature and sometimes walking away from a battle is a difficult feat to accomplish. I lowered my blade and chakram to the floor and stood glaring at Hera. This time I was taking the advice I had so often given my wife... sometimes it's best to be able to live to fight another day. "Chain her." Hera said. She was smart. I could only wonder if Hephaestus fashioned these locks for her. I was shacked by my ankles with metal cuffs and a bar that held my legs a shoulder's width apart. My arms were raised above my head and the same, shackles with a bar in the middle, was attached. A length of chain was lowered from the ceiling and was attached to the top bar, fitted through a metal ring in the middle of the solid rod. I was left standing, but I'm sure hoisting me up would be part of the entertainment she had planned. I gave her a look that told her she'd have to do better than this, to which she responded with a slap to my face. I found myself grinning back at her when I felt the strike. Being down here definitely sapped a God's power. She struck me and the force of it wouldn't didn't even make me think twice. "You won't have that smirk for long, warrior." She commented. I understood what she meant. She needed me. I was mortal and could retrieve the Elixir for her, but that didn't mean I needed to have all my body parts to do it. I knew she would torture me, and that just came with the territory, of being a warrior on this kind of a mission. I already knew I would die before I would help her, but I wondered how much blood I would lose and how long it would take her to realize that fact. The first strike is always the hardest, when you see your own blood or hear your bones break. After that it's all down hill. To tell the truth I think she told her guy to go easy on me. When he backed away, signaling that the first round was over, I felt sore and generally beat up, but nothing nearly like I anticipated. I have to say the worst pain was the sting of my split lip. I knew
it could and probably would get a lot worse as time went on. "I'll give you some time to think it over, Xena," Hera said. I wondered if her powers were waning further or it was my mental blocking that kept her from reading my thoughts. She dematerialized and was gone and the soldiers filed out of the great hall. I stood there, suspended but with my feet still touching the floor. I thought of Eponin and Autolycus for about the hundredth time that candlemark and could only hope that they were still alive. I looked up at my manacles and realized a good thief would be just the thing to have right about now. * * *
I leaned my head back and raised up onto my toes to ease the ache that was beginning in my shoulders from having my arms raised so high. Better than a thief... I'd give my chakram for one of Gabrielle's back rubs, the kind where she can ease the kink out my left shoulder, the one I always seem to dislocate. Of course, now I am remembering the time I was in Ellysia during one of my wife's massages, the time that ended up with me in a position much like the one I was in right now. I thought of Thalassa, a young woman much like my bard, and a silent pain swept through me at the memory. I wronged the woman... terribly, but just like Gabrielle, Thalassa eventually forgave me and was more concerned about when I would forgive myself. I will always remember her words to me before I left that island.
"My ability to do good had been crippled... the evil Xena, she did that to me... don't let her do it to you." This latter became a great deal more difficult to accomplish. As a matter of fact... have I yet? Brie had it right when we said goodbye on those docks before they hauled me away to the island prison. She knew there was
more going on inside my head, but she accepted my answer, if not my decision. I was no longer looking for redemption when I accepted incarceration; I desired only punishment. When I looked into Gabrielle's face, standing there on the dock, waiting for me to be shipped away, I realized this was my real punishment. If only they all knew that all they ever had to do to me to make me pay for my crimes, was to take me away from my bard. I tried to tell her, tell her how much I loved her, how much I would always love her. I wanted her to know, but just when I reached out to her, they grabbed me and dragged me to the ship. I know my bard didn't understand why I let them take me. Her cries echoed in my ears for a long time as I sat huddled in the hold of the ship, until I clamped my hands over my ears to drown out the still lingering pleas.
"Xena. Xena! Xena, listen to me! Xena, please don't do this! Xena!" I hadn't forgotten Alti's vision. Somewhere, deep inside, past all my pain at the knowledge that I would never see my Gabrielle again, was the realization that if I were not in my bard's life, I would not end up leading her to her death. The vision of the snow covering the top of Mt. Amaro and Gabrielle and I being crucified began to haunt my waking as well as my sleeping moments. If this were the price to pay to keep Gabrielle safe, to live out the rest of her life, then I became willing to pay it. I didn't even realize that Gabrielle and Thalassa kept in touch with one another, until after my wife and I were married. We stopped at the Amazon village while on our way to visit Jordan, the young heir that became such a close friend to both Gabrielle and I, during the young Princess' stay in the village before our wedding. Gabrielle always fit in time for a little paperwork when we visited the Amazons. Friends that my wife corresponded with knew that if they sent their scroll on to the Amazons, Gabrielle would eventually see it.
Brie told me that Thalassa and her new friend hadn't been able to make it to our joining and sent regrets. I was shocked. I had no idea Gabrielle stayed in contact with the woman from the small fishing village in the Saronic Gulf. My wife explained that Thalassa was no longer
Commandant of the prison on Shark Island. She left the place that was as much a penitentiary for her own soul, as for the criminals that were sentenced there. She did go about making some wonderful reforms to the place, and although it is still a penal colony for hardened criminals, the treatments are more just and the facilities somewhat more humane. It was working with a commission from Athens that lead her to her friend, who in truth, Gabrielle said, was her lover. When Brie first mentioned paying a social call on Thalassa and friend, I balked at the idea. Of course, the Queen does have a way about her and when she read me some of the scrolls that the redhead sent her, I was a goner. I was rather impressed at the healing process that Thalassa finally allowed herself and the brightness to her letter to Gabrielle. She told my wife of the love she found with a woman who saw her for who she was and thanked Gabrielle for explaining the concept of looking through "love's eyes". She spoke of me in a friendly, an even joking manner, and I could tell that I must have been a source of conversation between the woman and my wife on more than one occasion. I was especially suspicious when Gabrielle insisted on reading the scrolls to me, refusing to let me see them myself. "Brie... come on, let me read them." I pleaded. "Xe." She looked at me with exasperation. "These are private letters." "So you have been telling her about me." "Only... some things... I mean, we talk." Gabrielle hedged. "What kind of things... Gods, you don't tell her what we do in bed, do you?" Now I was worried. "No! I mean... well... not... a lot..." "What? Gabrielle! Give me those scrolls." I demanded.
"Xena! They're my letters and we really don't talk about you... much. I mean, they're, well they're... you know woman to woman stuff." Gabrielle was doing a pitiful job at getting herself out of this one. My usually eloquent bard was digging this hole deeper and deeper, so I thought I'd have a little fun. "In case you haven't noticed lately, my lovely bride, but I am a woman too." She smiled as her face took on a beautiful blush. "Yes, I know. You proved that fact quite well last night." "And, again this morning." I added. I reached for the scrolls and she backed up just out of my reach. "Xe... it's a wife thing." "And, I would be?" I folded my arms across my chest, tapping my boot against the floor. By this time my poor wife was in a frazzle. She didn't know whether I was teasing or serious and she looked as if she didn't know whether to giggle or cry. "It's just not a warrior thing, okay?" She finally admitted, somewhat near tears. I smiled and kissed her forehead. "Well, why didn't you just say that, my heart?"She smacked me in the arm and reached up to kiss me, finally realizing I was teasing. I wrapped my arms around her, intent on proving to her for the second time that day that I was indeed a woman. I think Hera believed that I fell asleep and she wasn't at all pleased that I was becoming so relaxed. She snapped at everyone from the guard who
held the door for her, to the henchman that cracked his knuckles loudly before starting to throw punches at me."Unhhh." I couldn't quite keep my mouth closed that time as I was punched right in the stomach. I had a hard time catching my breath, but it could have been worse... he could have been aiming for my ribs. "You know, Xena... I can keep this up for a very long time." Hera said from her temporary throne.I lifted my head and sneered. "What about Olympus... how much time have you really got?"I received a boot to my midsection that time. Gods my stomach is going to be sore for days. Hera glared at me with those pale eyes that were like chips of ice and I could see her arms were shaking in her anger."Don't think I won't kill you, warrior." The Goddess hissed.I shrugged, well; I gave as much of a shrug as I could under the circumstances. Nobody really wants to die and I didn't think Hera would actually do it, but if I had to go, then this was the kind of thing I wanted to go out doing. Gabrielle taught me about fighting for the greater good and there was no better example than this. Perhaps I was delaying Hera just long enough for Apollo and the rest of the Gods to win the battle on Olympus. Hopefully Auto and Eponin were still alive and could find a way to the Diamond Chamber. There were other ways this could still play out. I so wanted my wife to be able to go on, to experience all the goodness that life had to offer. If the Olympians failed; my sweet Brie having her life cut short, and I was to meet Hades right now, then at least I would be able to hold my head up when I met my wife in the Fields, knowing I did what was right. I looked at the goddess through the one eye that wasn't swollen shut. "Give it up, Hera... it's never going to happen." "Bring her down!" Hera ordered. I felt the chain that held my feet off the floor give a little, but when my feet were finally within reach of the ground, I found I couldn't hold the chains and myself up. I dropped to my knees and when the chain continued to lower my arms, they too fell to the ground until I was on all fours, my back and shoulder muscles screaming in relief."I want her head." Hera said slowly and I knew that she said it that way just so it would sink in.The interrogator turned executioner pulled a broadsword from a scabbard on the table. I
tried to even out my breathing, my mind searching for that one last trick, my body trying to pull itself together for one last stand. I couldn't accomplish either. "No, use her own sword. That makes it so much more fitting, doesn't it Xena?" Hera was enjoying this now. I'm not sure what the Goddess expected me to do. She knew me better than to think I would beg and plead for my life. I would plead for Gabrielle's if I thought it would do any good, but I knew that wasn't the case. I had no intention of leaving the mortal realm with any less dignity than the way I lived while I was here. "The way you kill me doesn't really matter, Hera... I'll be just as dead. If you're thinking you can frighten me into changing my mind then think again. No one will help you Hera, not after what you've done to mortals already." I gained a little strength from my soliloquy and raised my body up to sit back on my heels. "There isn't a mortal alive who will help you to destroy this world, Hera. If you kill me you lose your one chance at getting the Elixir... who else will help you?" I raised my voice. "Who will help you when I'm dead, Hera? Who, eh? Who will get the Elixir for you then?" I was nearly screaming as the executioner lifted my sword. "I will." A steady voice came from the back of the Great Hall. Half of me wanted to shout with joy at the sound of the familiar voice, while the other half wanted to scream in agony over my friend's decision. Everyone, including Hera turned at the sound. "Spare Xena's life and lives of the Amazons and I'll retrieve the Elixir for you." Eponin said. "Well, it seems you brought an Amazon with you on your noble little quest, Xena." Hera responded to Eponin's statement, turning back to look at me.
The executioner still held my own sword over my neck and it crossed my mind to hope that his arms weren't getting tired. Eponin came forward slowly and half a dozen soldiers made a move to intercept her. Hera backed them off with a wave of her hand and I realized that Eponin had no idea what she was getting herself into. I searched the Amazon's eyes, looking for a sign, something meant for me alone. Perhaps she planned an escape and this was all part of her plan. I realized, however, as I penetrated those brown eyes with my own intense gaze that this was no ruse. Eponin had every intention of carrying out Hera's wish. "Ep, don't do this." I pleaded. "We don't have a choice, Xena." Ep replied. "We do have a choice, Ep. We don't let her fucking win, that's our choice, that's the only choice!" I was surprised that Hera was letting me talk, but I think it amused her to see us at odds. I'm sure she was as pleased as all get out to see me in chains at her feet trying to reason with my friend. "Gabrielle is my Queen, Xena... the Amazons are all I have. I have to at least try." "Do you really think Gabrielle will want to continue living that way, Ep? You know her nearly as well as I do. Do you honestly believe Gabrielle will want to go on living knowing her mortality was paid for with the blood of all humanity? For the love of Artemis, Eponin, don't do this." Eponin looked like she was actually thinking about what I said, but when she turned to Hera, I knew I'd lost. The Amazon made her decision and, chained as I was, I was helpless to stop what came next. "Hera, my name is Eponin, in case you aren't aware. I will go in and obtain the Elixir, but in exchange I demand the lives of Xena, Gabrielle, and all the Amazon nation be spared." "You're not in much of a position to demand anything, Amazon." Hera replied.
"Actually, I am. I'm an Amazon Warrior and I can be just as stubborn and strong as Xena. If you want to behead both of then so be it, but I'm your last chance at getting into the Diamond Chamber." Eponin lowered her head. I hated her at that moment, but at the same time I couldn't condemn her. She was only doing what she thought was right. She was risking her life, her mortal soul, for her friends and her people. She just didn't realize how misguided her actions were. Hera gazed at the bowed head for a few long moments. "Nooo, you're not my last chance... there is another. Your thoughts give you away Amazon. Where is the thief?" the Goddess asked. I watched as my Amazon friend lifted her head, tears coming from her eyes, rolling down her cheek to spill from the edge of a hard set jaw. "He's dead." She replied softly, and I felt a sharp stab of pain in my own chest. "I can feel the truth of it." Hera responded to Eponin's admission. "Very well, Amazon. If you keep your part of the bargain and deliver the Elixir to me, I will spare the warrior and all the Amazons from annihilation. I know the oath of an Amazon warrior is strong. Do you swear on your Queen's life that you will bring the Elixir to me?" Eponin's brow furrowed and I watched as a bead of sweat trickled from her scalp and then down the side of her face. "I swear on the life of my Queen and by all that is sacred to the Amazons, that I will retrieve and deliver the diamond bottle to you alone." Eponin said through clenched teeth. If the sound of destiny could have made a noise it would have been heard in the echo of Eponin's voice, resounding off the high stone walls, as she swore a blood oath to the High Goddess of Olympus. "The chamber is across from this room. Shall we my young Amazon
friend?" Hera motioned with a wave of her hand, allowing Eponin to go first. "But, Xena... I may need her help." Ep stammered. "I'm afraid Xena can't be trusted just yet. Lift her back up." Hera ordered and my executioner returned my sword to its scabbard and left it on the table. "She'll be here safe and sound when we return." The large soldier turned the wheel against the stone wall and I was returned to a standing position, but thankfully he left my feet still on the ground. "Eponin!" I called out. "Please..." "I'm sorry, Xena... I have to do it this way." The Amazon replied. My executioner folded his massive arms and remained within close range, but Hera seemed to have other ideas. "She's not going anywhere... come." She ordered and the soldiers filed out behind my friend and the Goddess. With that action I knew that Hera had no intention of keeping her end of the bargain. Once she took possession of the diamond bottle, she would murder Ep and leave for Olympus. I assumed that was the reason that she took all her soldiers with her. My suspicions were confirmed when Hera strolled back into the Great Hall alone. She walked up close to me and ran a hand along my face. "You would have been a handsome addition to my collection of concubines, warrior." Hera remarked. I snapped my teeth at the hand that burned like acid against my skin. Jerking my head away from her touch, I snarled at her. "Well, perhaps your little Gabrielle will be able to fill that spot." Hera purred. "Don't flatter yourself. Besides, I'm not an idiot, Hera. I know you plan on having us killed once you get the Elixir. Eponin is just a little more trusting
than I am. How do you plan on enslaving Gabrielle if she's dead?" "As for Gabrielle... All it will take is one drop of the Elixir to cure her. Surely, I will be able to spare one drop. Then I'll take your little Amazon whore and keep her as my own. She and I will have a wonderful time. From the stories that I hear about the two of you she'll make a lovely body slave, don't you think? "Gabrielle will die before she lets you touch her!" I hissed. "Oh no, warrior," Hera moved in and lowered her voice to a whisper. "I'll make her mine and after I'm through training her, she will beg me to touch her... and she'll love it." There was no way I could pretend that those words didn't affect me. That voice inside my head told me I would never stand for anyone else touching my bard. Her love and her body belonged to me alone. Her laughter and her tears... only I would be able to see that side of the Queen. Hera laughed at my frustration, knowing full well how her words struck me. I tilted my head back and let out an angry howl that sounded part human, part beast. By the time the sound carried throughout the Hall and slowly echoed back to me, Hera was gone. I shook the chains and tried to use what strength I had to bend the bar that was between my wrists. After a candlemark of failed attempts, I let my muscles go slack to ease the sharp pains that ripped through my aching muscles. I wanted to scream or even cry, but I no longer had the strength. Starvation and dehydration weren't pleasant ways to die and I seriously began regretting that Hera didn't take my head when she threatened to. * * *
"You feel like a stone wall behind me, Xe... what's wrong?"
I rode in my usual position atop Argo, behind Gabrielle. I always said it was because I was a better rider, but if the truth were to be known... it was only because I enjoy where my hands get to roam. "It's this whole situation. Brie, I know you and Thalassa have become good friends, but I don't know if going to see them is such a good idea. I feel... I feel odd. I mean, Gods... what is her lover going to do? If the positions were reversed I'd be inviting me here to kill me!" I finished in a slight panic. "It's not like that at all, sweetheart... hey, trust me, okay? I would never put you in that kind of situation." I felt her hand rest softly against my forearm and she turned her head, already leaning back against my chest, then placed a gentle kiss at the hollow of my throat. As always, I melted at my bard's touch and repeated the often-used phrase in my head. Whatever Gabrielle wants... Gabrielle gets. Thalassa and her partner, Suko owned a small inn, no more than four rooms, but they had big plans. I was a little unnerved when the redhead introduced her lover. I expected her to go for the warrior type, then I expected I would have to go for my sword, but her partner was rather like... Gabrielle? Petite and blonde, with a personality and exuberance for life that just screamed Gabrielle. Thalassa found someone she loved, but that someone favored my bard's appearance, My bard! That threw me a little. The two women were a joy to be around and I felt myself relaxing a bit more than I thought I'd be able to. I really was enjoying myself, right up until the moment when I noticed Thalassa watching Gabrielle when she though no one else was watching, and probably a little closer than was necessary. By the end of the evening it was apparent she was flirting... well, at least it was apparent to me! Gabrielle said she was just being nice.
"It's still about two candlemarks till we serve dinner, Gabrielle. What don't you and Xena go to your room and settle in. Suko is making sure there's a nice hot bath waiting for you in a tub that just happens to be warrior sized. Thalassa said. Well, that sounded like just the thing, but Thalassa cornered me outside our room and asked me to take a walk with her. I reluctantly went and listened to her speak of her newfound love and how she'd put all the feelings of self-loathing behind her. I couldn't help but admire her courage for taking that first step into a new life. I wanted to let her know that I was watching her all afternoon, while she watched my wife. I wanted to call her on it, but damn, if the woman didn't beat me to the punch and leave me tongue tied at the same time. "You've come a long way, Thalassa, and I'm very happy for you. It still feels strange..." I started to apologize for the past once again. "Let's not even go there, Xena," she said softly, lightly touching my arm. I nodded and we spoke of the inn and the plans the two women had. Finally the redhead turned to me and stopped walking. "It would probably be best if I was completely honest with you, Xena. I suppose you've already noticed how Suko tends to favor our favorite Amazon Queen?" she asked, but I knew it was a rhetorical question. "I didn't bring you here or make friends with Gabrielle to try and steal her from you, warrior." "That would probably be a wise move on your part," I responded with a high arch to one eyebrow, folding my arms across my chest. "I suppose everyone falls a little in love with your bard, don't they?" Thalassa asked seriously.
My bard... interesting choice of words and I'm glad she phrased it that way. I wasn't at the 'smoke coming out my ears' jealousy stage yet, but at least I knew I wasn't going crazy or becoming more paranoid than I know I can be. "I'm not sure I know what to say to this." I answered. "But, no, you wouldn't be the first person to become enamored of my wife." I threw in that that possessive term of endearment for her benefit. "Between you and I, Xena... she doesn't know she does that to people, does she?" I chuckled. "No, Thalassa, the woman has no idea what she does in that regard. It's my job to see that no one takes advantage of her innocence when it comes to those matters." Thalassa and I stared at one another; neither of us seemed willing to be the first to back down. I could feel my gaze beginning to turn fiery at the thought of anyone else trying to take my place with Gabrielle and I think Thalassa was smart enough to see it. She lowered her eyes and began to speak. "I love Suko very much. I had no idea, in my conscious mind anyway, that I was comparing her to Gabrielle. I may have become attracted to Suko for that reason, but it's not why I fell in love or why I want to spend the rest of my life with her." Thalassa turned and began walking again and I followed alongside. "Xena, I would never think of coming between you and Gabrielle." She paused. "Always a good thing to know." I quipped. I didn't joke to embarrass, but I wanted her to know that I understood what she was saying. Sure there was this little voice in my head that told me to beat the Tartaurus out of the bitch for even thinking about Gabrielle that
way, but I was getting extremely good at blowing off that little sound in my head. I knew, better than anyone did, just how hard it was to resist Gabrielle's innocent charms. Nothing is more of a turn on than a woman who has no idea how beautiful she is. "I'm sorry," I apologized, "go on." "Don't apologize, Xena... I feel better just speaking to you about this. I know that tonight I'm going to have Hades to pay when Suko and I get alone. She had no idea what Gabrielle looked like. Xena, I'm afraid Suko will think that's the only reason I love her." She stopped at looked at me expectantly. I thought for a moment and wondered how I would convince Gabrielle if our positions in this little scenario were reversed. I let my lips stretch into a small smile. "You'll have to convince her." I said. "But, what if she doesn't believe me... no matter what I say?" Thalassa asked. "Sometimes words aren't enough. There are times and circumstances when you can't merely tell someone they're loved... you have to show them how much. Make Suko believe that she is the only woman in your heart." "Oh." The redhead responded with a blank look. "Ohhhh." She then added as realization flowed through her. She looked at me with a devilish grin. "So, is that what works for you?" "Absolutely." I affirmed with a smile. Thalassa laughed out loud. "No wonder Gabrielle is such a happy woman."
"I haven't had any complaints yet." I responded, bowing slightly at the waist. Thalassa laughed again. "Oh, Xena... Gabrielle was right about you." "What about me?" "That you have a one track mind." The redhead answered laughing loudly at my embarrassment. "Hey... she's telling all my secrets!" I laughed just as loudly. It felt good, being there and laughing next to a woman that I could now call friend. Suddenly Thalassa's scars disappeared from my eyes and the woman I saw was lovely, on the inside as well as the outside. All it took was for her to believe it herself and for someone to look at her through love's eyes. The young woman looked at me and I felt her offer up an unseen olive branch. Thalassa moved on past the horrible life I condemned her to live and I could see that she wanted me to do the same. As we walked back to the inn I felt something stir inside of me, and if it wasn't forgiveness, it felt a lot like it. * * *
By the time I got back to our room, Gabrielle was already reclining in a large tub, steam rising in thin wisps around her. Gods, she looked incredible and she belonged to me. Never mind that most of the time I was just thankful that I belonged to my young Queen. Suddenly, however, my talk with Thalassa had me feeling very possessive. That small voice was back and it repeated one word over and over again, echoing in my head. Mine.
I bent down and kissed her neck. I could tell that she already knew I was there, even though I slipped in rather silently. Gods, she's getting good at that. "Well, did you two have a good talk?" Gabrielle asked. "Quite enlightening." I answered. I removed my garments quickly and knelt down outside of the large tub just behind Gabrielle. I began to massage her neck, then her shoulders, moving my hands lower along her back until she moved forward to give me clear access. I saw my opportunity and slipped into the bath behind my wife. I pulled her to me until I could feel her backside press against the dark curls between my legs. It took everything in me not to moan at the pleasurable sensation. I picked up a soft bathing cloth and a little soap and began the gentle seduction of my wife's skin. I ran the soapy cloth all across her skin, never lingering in one area. I brushed quickly over her sensitive nipples, feeling her breath quicken, then I ran the cloth lightly between her legs, to be rewarded with a slight gasp at the action. When I turned her around and handed her the cloth, indicating it was my turn, she grinned, putting my body through the same wondrous torture. When she made a move to leave the still warm water I pulled her back against me again, slipping an arm around her waist and spreading my legs wider just to feel her against me. I caressed her ear, first with my tongue, then running my teeth along the heated skin. I spread her legs wide and ran both my hands along the inside of her thighs, letting my fingers run along the crease where her legs met the rest of her body. "Xe... we can't do this." Gabrielle breathed heavily and I already knew that she was close to begging me. "Sweetheart, we're guests here... ohhhh, yes... how will it sound?"
"It will sound like I'm having my way with my wife." I replied, pulling her body more tightly to my own and relishing in the small sparks of fire that came as my breasts slid against her back, the dark nipples growing hard from just that small bit of contact. My hands have made love to her hundreds of times, they know every inch of her skin like it was my own and I let those hands roam to explore all the spots on her body that I was sure would cause her to change her mind. I breathed in the scent of her hair and kissed her shoulders and neck, letting my tongue reach out to slide against her skin. I couldn't help smiling when I felt her body shiver as the taste of her exploded on my tongue. "Xe, we can't... not here. It could be embarrassing." My wife made an extremely have hearted attempt to move away from me. I stopped, but kept my arm locked around her waist. "I cause you embarrassment?" I asked. I admit, my jealousy and possessiveness in regards to my wife was pushing me into warlord mode, and there is nothing more fragile than a reformed warlord's ego. Gabrielle turned her head back to me quickly and the look on her face told me I might be wrong, but it was the way she voiced the single word she spoke that convinced me that I was mistaken. "Never," she practically hissed. I reached out and let my fingertips gently touch the cheek of the face that was turned toward me. My hand slid down and held her chin, reaching in to place a soft kiss on those contrite lips. It was my wife who escalated the tender kiss into one filled with heat and passion. She knew what it did to me when she ran her tongue teasingly along my upper lip that way and I groaned as the sensation heightened my own arousal. My hand found its way to a beautifully smooth breast and I covered the flesh with the palm
of my hand while continuing to let my wife tease my mouth. When I felt a hard point press against my palm, I began to knead the flesh, to receive Gabrielle's breathless moan in reward. She pulled away and I could see she was breathing a little faster. She searched my eyes and then lowered them, a charming blush spreading across her cheeks. "Xe... it's just the things you do to me... I know I'll be... I mean, I'll be loud. I'll embarrass the both of us." She finished. Once more I lifted the proud chin until her eyes met mine. I moved in swiftly and took possession of my wife's mouth. It was a fiery kiss that left little doubt as to who the Queen of my heart really was. We both had difficulty breathing when our lips finally parted. "Who do you belong to, Gabrielle?" She never hesitated. "You, Xena... always you, my love." I kissed her again, harder this time as if to reaffirm my ownership. I was never long on words and usually just when I needed them the most they failed me, but the site of this woman, relinquishing her body... her very soul to me, gave me the ability to speak. "You could never embarrass me, my heart. I want you to be loud, Gabrielle. I want everyone within ten leagues of this inn to know that you belong to me, to know that no one else can make you feel the way I do. I want them to hear you and know that no other will ever know this indescribable pleasure but me. I want them to hear how absolutely beautiful you sound when you come for me. I want them to know that you're mine." Her chest was heaving, trying to bring in air, and I knew that my words did indeed work their magic. Gabrielle turned her body until she sat in my lap, facing me, and wrapped her muscled legs around my waist.
"Get me out of this tub and I'll scream your name until they hear me on Olympus." she rasped in a desperate tone. I didn't have to be asked twice. I stood and lifted us both from the water, Gabrielle's legs wrapping around me tighter, her arms encircling my neck. I stopped and kneeled at the end of the bed and lay Gabrielle on her back so that her knees dangled over the edge of the large mattress. I spread her thighs apart and ran my hands along the top of the trim, muscled legs, licking my lips in anticipation when I caught the scent of her arousal. I continued on across her belly, finally cupping a breast in each hand. The water ran in thin trickles down her body and I used my tongue, everywhere I could reach, to gather up the moisture that flowed across her satiny skin. Gabrielle moaned and leaned up on one elbow to watch me deliver the tantalizing strokes and I took care to run my tongue across the muscled plane of her abdomen. A tiny drop of water mesmerized me as it made its way down her chest, rolling along one perfect breast. Just as the droplet let go of the hardened point of flesh, I speared out my tongue and felt the moisture fall there. Gabrielle groaned loudly as I swiftly enveloped the pale pink nipple in my mouth. I alternated between each breast, relentlessly licking, sucking, and then nibbling on the stiff peaks. "Xena... please." Gabrielle pleaded. I smiled at the sound and knew that I wasn't about to make it that easy. I leaned back on my heels and moved in once more to taste the passion that seemed to emanate from Gabrielle's skin. I worked my tongue up the inside of each thigh and it took all my efforts at control not to cry out in ecstasy when my tongue slid through the delicious wetness clinging to the inner part of her legs. Breathing deeply, I exhaled a warm breath against her center and she strained to propel her hips in my direction.
I pulled back slightly and chuckled, a low rumbling sound that caused my wife to whimper in frustration. Allowing only the tip of my tongue to graze across her swollen lips, I pulled back again to listen to her groan sharply in disappointment. "Is this what you want to feel?" "Oh Xena, you know it is." Gabrielle responded, then thrust her hips in my direction once more. "Then let me hear how badly you want to feel me." "Gods, Xena... please, do it!" Gabrielle practically screamed. That's what I wanted to hear. I nearly climaxed right then and there at the heady scent of Gabrielle, combined with the pure adrenaline that shot through my veins. I pulled the writhing hips toward me and slipped my tongue within the drenched folds. The first taste of my lover was like an aphrodisiac to me. I was in a frenzy and I simply couldn't get enough. Plus, the sounds Gabrielle was making urged me even higher, knowing full well that anyone within a stone's throw of our room could hear the sounds of her pleasure. I was absolutely lost in the sensual delight located at the apex of my wife's thighs. Her scent and that sweet musky taste, they caused me to relish in every exquisite detail. I lingered, exploring and comparing the textures under my tongue. Gabrielle reached down and slid her own fingers into her wetness, brushing past my tongue to finger the hardened area that was now swollen with need. During our lovemaking I encouraged my wife to touch herself, my own pleasure derived at the site of her caressing herself. This was not to be one of those times and I quickly claimed the hand in mine and growled. "No... mine!" I pushed the hand away and urged her thighs further apart. Within
moments, the wayward hand returned. This time Gabrielle moved in slowly, it was her way of telling me I was moving much to slowly to suit her. The threatening snarl was something I was barely aware of as coming from myself, and the sound reminded me of a wild animal, protecting its territory, daring another to take what was theirs. My wife was slow to grasp the concept and she reached in once more. I swiftly grabbed both her wrists and held them at the side of her body, while I leveled an intense blue gaze on her. "Gabrielle, this is mine. Your body belongs to me right now and I am in control, of you and of the pleasure you will be allowed. Do you understand?" I could see my proud wife warring with herself, her panting breaths the only sound in the room. Gabrielle and I had enjoyed a little play acting in the past with me in warlord mode, but it was never this intense. This was different because it was real, and although I would explain it to her later, right now I wanted to see how freely my wife would give herself up to me. Her next action should not have surprised me. Gabrielle slowly lay back onto the bed and I released her wrists. She raised a hand to run her fingertips across my cheek and deliberately placed her arms above her head, her fingers digging into the blankets. I smiled at her choice. "Oh yes, that's my girl, Brie." I rose up and leaned over her prone form, pressing my body down on top of her. Sliding my hand into the golden mane, I held her hair in one hand and pulled back gently, exposing her throat to my kisses. I sucked hard at the flesh on her neck, marking her as mine. I let my skin slide against her own as I moved lower, continuing to mark the skin on her chest, breasts, and belly. I repeated the action along the inside of her thighs and when I nipped the sensitive skin, hard enough to leave my teeth marks embedded there, Gabrielle cried out from a mix of pleasure and
pain and spread her legs wider. I released another involuntary growl that had little to do with anger as I swiftly buried my face within the soaked, honey-blonde curls. Gabrielle cried out in delight and relief, and I enthusiastically situated my tongue so that it felt like it was everywhere at once. Her hips thrust themselves harder against my face and by this point I was surprised someone from the inn had not yet come to see what all the noise was about. My wife was being her usual audible self, and I did nothing to discourage the sounds. I captured the hard swelling between my lips and sucked on the flesh, my tongue occasionally flicking over it. I also slipped a finger inside, followed by another and Gabrielle was so close, she was trembling in mere anticipation of the moment. "Oh yes... Xena I--" Gabrielle started to call out, and when I raised my eyes, never stopping my tongue or the in and out gliding motion of my hand, she realized her error and clamped her mouth closed. I was well acquainted with my wife's body and I knew what she desired. I was proud at the way she was willing to forgo her own enjoyment, simply to accede to my demand to be in control of her pleasure. Rewarding such behavior would only bring about pleasurable results the next time we were in this situation, so I did reward my bard. I looked up with a devilish grin. "More?" I asked. "Oh yes, please!" she pleaded. I slid my fingers from their slick haven and thrust three fingers deep inside. Gabrielle's hips thrust back hard onto my hand again and again and I resumed tonguing the pulsing area at the top of her cleft. "Oh Gods... yes... yes... Oh, right there... Xena..." I could feel her body as
it trembled uncontrollably, her cries taking on strength. Suddenly her back arched and her body froze as I continued to penetrate her, leading her into the arms of her climax. "Gods... Xeeennnnnaaaa!" The scream that girl let out must have truly been heard at least on the foothills of Olympus. I cried out sharply as my own release ripped through my body, simply from feeling the convulsive tremors as my wife clenched down hard around my fingers. We could do no more than lie there, each of us taking in great breaths of air. I sunk down to the floor and rested my cheek against one of Gabrielle's thighs. I tenderly slid my fingers from her, as her body still quivered from aftershocks. I knew without looking that the smile on her face matched my own. I reached in and placed a feather light kiss on that very intimate, sensitive area. "Mine." I whispered against the damp flesh. * * *
"You're the only woman I know who can have erotic dreams while bleeding and hanging up in chains." The voice came from above me and I realized that I had been in a deep sleep, naturally dreaming of my bard. I was going to have to start being careful about talking in my sleep. I became oblivious to my surroundings, but I wasn't so bewildered that I couldn't place that smart-ass voice. "Auto?" "The one and only King of Thieves." He tossed back.
By the Gods... I thought... I thought you were dead." I tried to say it without my voice breaking. I could feel tears rise to my eyes. "Can you get me out of these things?" I shook the manacles. "Can I?" Auto's voice was tinged with indignation. "Sorry... will you?" "Workin' on it now. You've got these things so bent up... what in the world have you been doing?" "Oh, not much... just hanging around. Come on Auto..." Both manacles came loose at once and I dropped like a sack of dried fruit. I felt my friend unlocking the restraints around my ankles, but I just laid back and closed my eyes for a moment to fight away a sudden attack of nausea. Autolycus helped me to sit up and offered me a waterskin, which I guzzled from. He pulled a cloth from the pack he still carried and poured some water on it, wiping the majority of the blood and dirt from my face. I was sure I looked a lot worse than I really was. Hera had her guy knock me around, not beat me to a pulp. "Tell me Eponin is in this with you." "Her idea... great little actress, huh?" "I hope she doesn't act her way to getting her throat slit. Hera doesn't have any intention of letting us live... what was she thinking?" I held out a hand and groaned as Autolycus helped me to my feet. I found my armor, pack, and weapons laid neatly on the closest table as if simply waiting for my return. "What's her plan?" I asked my friend. "Well..." he hesitated, "she does what you saw her go off and do, and I get
you out of the chains... and..." he trailed off. "And? And what?" I began to feel stronger once my armor was in place and the realization dawned on me. "There is no plan, is there?" I asked flatly. "Oh, like you always have a plan." Auto responded. "Great. Come on." I marched toward the main door. Stopping abruptly I turned and looked at the thief. "Thanks, Auto... I owe you big time." "And, don't think I won't collect." He answered with a wink. "Come on," I smiled, ignoring the pain that action caused my bloodied lip. "Let's go give our Amazon actress a hand." * * *
Autolycus lead me up along the narrow passage that he came down through earlier. It was like an attic that led out the Great Hall and left an opening high up on the ceiling. The entrance to the tunnel was covered with a small wooden door, painted to blend perfectly with the stone. Without really examining the trapdoor, one would never realize it wasn't a part of the ceiling. We made our way on our hands and knees, thankfully we didn't run into any of my favorite rodent friends. Seems like every castle tunnel or dungeon I get thrown into, that I end up being accosted by rats. When we reached the end of the passage and we quietly lifted the trapdoor off its frame, we found out than we were nearly on top of the whole scene playing out below us.
Our timing was perfect. I could see that Eponin was just coming through the open door of the Diamond Chamber. I had no idea what she thought she was going to do once she turned over the brightly sparkling bottle of Elixir. Was she waiting for me to come up with a way to snatch it before it actually fell into Hera's hands? Damn! I found myself mentally cursing my friends for not being clear on what the plan was to be. I suddenly realized that I sounded like Brie. She hated the way I constantly told her to simply trust me. She always wanted to know ahead of time what the plan was. It wasn't that I was being mean to her, only that most of the time I didn't have a plan. I went by instinct and, being the hedonist I am, what felt good at the time. So, as I watched my Amazon friend begin to extend her arm, the diamond bottle held loosely in her hand, I did exactly what Gabrielle would have done to me. I took a huge breath, let out an insanely loud battle cry, and jumped right into the middle of the whole mess. Hera tried to snatch the bottle from Eponin's grasp, but missed when the warrior turned toward me, a look of surprise on both their faces. Hera did appear genuinely astonished to see me, which I loved. I had to nail the few soldiers, who were quick enough to come to their senses and attack me, but I was moving in one direction, and that was toward Hera. I heard Auto drop to the floor behind me and caught the sound of metal against metal as he drew his sword and attacked. I tossed my chakram with a hard flick of the wrist and took out the next three advancing soldiers. Eponin saw where I was headed, but damn if she didn't make one move to... well, move! She had the strangest look on her face when I thought she realized just what I was up to. I could hear Auto still at my back and I prayed that Ep would get with it and at least move away from Hera. I knew the minute the Goddess got her hands on the bottle, she would dematerialize and be gone. It all happened in only a few fractions of a moment, but I knew there was only one way I could keep that bottle from the Goddess, and that was if she had no powers at all. We just happened to be standing in front of the place that would do it. I feigned swordplay with one of Hera's soldiers on my right,
but out of the corner of my eyes I saw where Hera's hand was headed and Eponin appeared oblivious. "Xena, No!" Eponin cried out. I flew right at the Goddess and just as her fingers wrapped themselves around the neck of the small gleaming bottle, I hit her in the midsection propelling the both of us through the open doorway of the Diamond Chamber. Eponin was right behind me, shouting something unintelligible, Auto brought up the rear just as I slammed the door shut. "Are you nuts?!" Eponin stood in front of me and shouted. "Me? What was that back there... could you have been anymore dense about what I was trying to do?" I shouted back. "You let her snatch it from you like she was some sort of expert pick-pocket!" "I had a plan and it was working!" "Oh, it was, was it. Well, what was this great, almighty plan of yours, to just give the damn thing to her?" I questioned, my voice raising about an octave in pitch. "Yes!" Eponin glared back at me. I didn't need to see the huge smirk on her face to realize what I'd done. I closed my eyes, lowered my head, and placed my hands on my hips before I spoke in a, softer than even normal, tone. "The Elixir isn't in the bottle." I phrased it as a statement since I now knew the answer. Eponin held up a small waterskin that had been looped through her belt, hanging by her left hip. "I looked up and rubbed my hand across my face. "Have I told you how good it is to see you again?"
Ep chuckled and shook her head. "You look like Tartaurus. Looks like your face ran into somebody's fist again." "Uh, ladies... I do hate to break up this touching moment, but I'd like to point out that we happen to be in a locked room with a very pissed off Goddess and her fan club out there doesn't seem to like it." Autolycus said, putting Ep and I in action. "Don't sweat the small stuff, my friend." I said to the thief, walking toward Hera, who was seated on the floor. "As you can see," I said, pointing to Hera, "she barely has enough strength to stand in here. That's what the place does to immortals. And these guys, who are beginning to become a pain in the ass, won't fare any better." To demonstrate my point and to stop the infernal pounding, I unlocked the door and pulled it open, swiftly dragging the closest of Hera's soldiers into the small room. He immediately sank to his knees as if his armor were to heavy to hold up. His mates took one giant step backward, the heroes that they were. "This is what happens to you when you come in here!" I shouted out the door, scooping up the fallen warrior and tossing him out the doorway. The minute he was out of the Diamond Chamber, his strength returned and he led the way for his friends as they turned tail and fled. "Brave bunch you got there." I said to Hera as I again slammed the door shut, just so the Goddess wouldn't try and crawl away. "See, things aren't so bad." I said to my friends as I circled the small room, hands on my hips, searching the ceiling for some means of escape. "Yup... only one little problem at this point." I drawled. "We're trapped in here." We all said in unison. * * *
"Well, I've been over every inch of this room... twice, and I only have one thing to say." Autolycus paused and looked over at us. "We're stuck here." He finished. "That's just what I wanted to hear." Eponin growled and glared at Hera. "You shouldn't have put your faith in the Warrior Princess," Hera commented. "She has a habit of letting people down." "Shut up before I slit your throat!" Eponin drew a dagger from her boot and advanced on the weakened Goddess. I stepped in front of Ep before she made it to Hera. The Goddess was sitting on the floor, her back leaning against the rough stone wall. She saw Eponin coming at her, but in her present condition there was nothing she could do to fend off the angry Amazon. "Ep... take it easy." I tried to calm her. "Don't tell me you're going to defend her?" "There's nothing I'd enjoy better than to see her get what she has coming, but while she's in here it would be tantamount to murder. I won't even kill an enemy unless they have a fighting chance, not in cold blood like this, Ep." I touched the top of her hand that held the dagger and she slowly put the weapon back in its sheath, hidden down in her boot. "Why Xena, I didn't know you cared." Hera said in a tired voice, still able to fix a superior smile on her face. "I said I wouldn't kill you, I didn't say anything about not beating the crap out of you, so just sit there and shut up." I turned and hissed at her, while Ep stood off to the side, grinning. "Tell me again why Apollo just can't zap us out of here?" Autolycus said
picking at some loose mortar surrounding a piece of stone. "Because he can't enter the Diamond Chamber or he'd be as useless as her." I pointed in Hera's direction. "As it is just being in the caverns severely limits any use of their powers." A few moments of silence passed until Eponin spoke. "What's that look for?" Eponin asked and I realized I must have that glazed over look going. "I was just thinking about something Apollo said to me... remember when he infused me with his power before we left? He said, When you need the
most strength, concentrate on what gives you power in life, and the force will be there for you. I didn't really focus on what he was trying to tell me at the time." I continued to stare at the wall where Autolycus chipped away some loose mortar. "You know, if I had enough of Apollo's power left, I bet I could blast through this wall." They all looked at me as if I was a Cyclops with two eyes. Brother, I was going to have to explain. "When I traveled in Chin I learned a great deal. Ep, you remember me telling you about Lao Ma?" Ep nodded her head and waited for me to continue. "She taught me a lot about how to channel certain types of energy and turn that energy into raw power, chi she called it." I paused as I remembered the woman that I loved before I knew my bard. "So, you're trying to tell us you're just gonna use this mind power and blast through ten feet of stone?" Autolycus had that look on his face and I'm sure he rolled his eyes when I turned my back. "I just need to concentrate is all." I said, standing in front of the back wall. "This is an outside wall, so to speak. I figure if we can get through, we'll end up in the cavern recesses. At least Apollo would be able to get to us there."
I loosened up a little so I could focus. The last time I tried to use Lao Ma's powers was when Gabrielle and I ended up in Chin. I was out for revenge against the Green Dragon and it turned out my innocent little bard made a deal with Ares to get her there before me. Brie thought she was trying to save me from myself by betraying my intentions to Ming Tien, turned out she was just jealous. I look back and wonder how I could have been so thick. Was that the action of a best friend or a woman in love? Oh well, it's a moot point now. I was about to be executed when I started remembering all the things Lao Ma said to me in her subtle way of teaching. She was the first person to ever call me, Warrior Princess, and to this day I'm sorry I bastardized the title with my headstrong lust for power. She meant it to be a title for me as a changed woman, a keeper of peace. I was never really able to call the power out again, certainly not at will. I always saw traces of it, but not nearly enough for what I needed to do now. I thought about her words, the ones I heard in my head just as I was to be executed.
"The entire world is driven by a will... blind and ruthless. In order to transcend the limitations of that world, you need to stop willing. Stop desiring. Stop hating." I bent my neck to the left and to the right, hearing the bones pop. I concentrated on the wall then I closed my eyes. I tried everything that Lao Ma taught me in the next few candlemarks, but I still couldn't harness more than a bad headache. I snarled in defeat and a small chunk of rock broke off and fell to the floor. Autolycus leaned over and picked up the piece of stone, no larger than his palm. "Oh hey, it works. What do ya think... another forty or fifty seasons and we'll be out of here." "Auto." Ep cautioned as I turned my back on all of them to go sit in the corner.
"I just need to think." I mumbled and they let me be. I couldn't figure out why Lao Ma's words incited me to such power when Gabrielle and I were in Chin, I mean, I broke the whole damn palace apart. I'm still the same me, well a little more whipped than in those days, but what the hell, belonging to Gabrielle has always been worth a little humiliation. So, why didn't it work this time? I was concentrating on the same teachings that Lao Ma instilled in me. The only thing different between then and now is that Gabrielle was there. I leaned back against the cool stone and sighed in exasperation. I tried to concentrate, but all I could focus on now was Gabrielle. * * *
"Xena?" "Hhmm?" "It's kind of cold out tonight." "Yea, I'm a little cool myself. Here, let me throw some more wood on the fire, that should help." I leave my bedroll and throw a few small pieces of wood that Gabrielle gathered earlier, onto the fire. I'm not really cold, but I know she would feel she was imposing if I got up to do this just for her. Gods, the girl can be funny sometimes. I go back to my own bedroll, on the other side of the campfire, and sit there, pretending to be drinking from the waterskin by my bed. I can't sleep and I know she can't either. We need to talk, to go over what's happened. We both need explanations and some reassurance, but neither of us makes the first move. Being the closed mouth warrior I am, I wait for the bard to begin. She doesn't and that
confuses me. There is only one thing that could stop this girl from talking and that's if she thought that I was angry with her. "Want some?" I hold up the skin. I see her shake her head, but she looks unhappy and that breaks my heart. She doesn't know that I've fallen in love with her and that now I can feel her pain as my own. I was angry, earlier... when I first put it all together, but it didn't last long. It took about a fortnight for me to piece it all together. Gabrielle would wake up screaming at some point in the night and be unable to return to sleep. She started to lose weight, of which she could ill afford, and the dark circles that hung under her eyes made her look sullen. Then Gabrielle started talking in her sleep. Once I heard the truth from her own lips, that she'd made a deal with Ares to get her to Chin ahead of me, I was shocked... then I was angry. I tried to think of all the reasons Gabrielle could have for doing such a thing, but when I learned the truth, all that anger melted away. My sweet, beautiful bard. I professed to love her, but when a debt needed to be paid on account of an old lover, I left her knowing I would probably never return. I told her it was a one way ticket and refused to even explain who Lao Ma was. So caught up in my own hurt that I never even looked up to see Gabrielle's suffering. She was jealous and afraid and so she made a rash decision. Of course, how well I know how Ares can incite one's emotions. I was losing Gabrielle and it was tearing me apart. We went through the healing of Illusia and grew even closer when we thought we were to lose our lives against the Persians. Gabrielle lay dying from a poisoned arrow wound and so I prepared to journey with her to meet Hades, and die in battle. All this we suffered through and now I had to watch the woman of my heart die a little bit every day because of her guilt. That's when I knew Gabrielle would have to go through Mnemosyne's ritual if she were ever to have a chance to get past this.
I knew if I led Gabrielle there on the pretense of meeting me, she would go in. I watched from a long ways off as she tried to decide what she would do. I sat there and cried for a long time after she entered the temple. I knew she was in a great deal of pain and she didn't know why herself yet. I wouldn't have blamed her if she had taken Mnemosyne's cure. I cried because I realized that the next time I saw Gabrielle she might have no recollection of who I was and what we meant to one another. That was the cruelest pain of all. Now, I stare at her face and I see that the pain of hiding the truth is gone, but it's been replaced with something new. Gabrielle has that look on her face, as she curls under her blanket and stares into the fire, that she used to get a lot when we first started traveling together. It was a cross between fear and sadness and she would grow melancholy whenever I grew moody and she thought I was about to ship her back to Potidaea. If she only knew I gave up that idea after only a few days of traveling together. I see it will be up to me to reassure my friend. I love this young Amazon Queen, and whether it's in friendship or as a lover, I want to show her all she does for me, and exactly what she means to me. I rise and pick up my bedroll and blanket and move to her side of the fire, lying my blanket down right next to her. "I don't know about you, but I'm kinda cold. Do you mind if we share both blankets?" I asked with as much innocence as I could muster. Gabrielle brightened immediately and I felt my heart grow lighter. I was right in my assumption about what was still troubling her and it felt good to be able to make her smile. I brushed my arm against hers and she was cold, but I also knew she got that way when she was nervous. "Move over here." I said and put my arm around her shoulder. I lay there on my back and Gabrielle rested her head on my shoulder. I
kissed the top of her head and I think she took that as a bit of encouragement. "I'm so sorry, Xena." Then the tears began. Usually I will do anything to stop those tears because they break my heart so, but I let my bard cry and wrapped my arms around her and stroked the blonde hair. When she cried all her tears out I lifted her chin and kissed her forehead. "After what we've gone through in the past year... Gabrielle, I'm just happy you're still my friend. We are still best friends, huh?" She nodded and smiled. "Always." "Always." I repeated. "I can't say that I would have acted any differently, if you'd just gone off and left me. I'm sorry, Gabrielle, I never meant to hurt you. You're my bestfriend and I love you, you know that, right?" "I do now." Gabrielle answered softly and I realized that too many times I didn't let her know that. "I love you, too, Xena." "Gabrielle, I know I don't tell you the kind of things you'd like to hear all the time and I know I can be brooding and sullen, and a royal pain in the ass most of the time, but don't ever think that it's because of you. Do you know how much you mean to me? You're the only thing that keeps me going sometimes. You're funny and smart and strong and just so many things I can't name them all." I paused and encouraged her to lift her chin again and look at me. "Do you know on the day we met, I had given up hope. Not just hope at ever seeing my family, or of being loved. I didn't want to live this life any longer. When I buried my armor and my weapons I wasn't just giving up being a warrior, I was giving up on life. I had every intention of taking my own life that day, then I saw you. When you offered to take the place of those other women and then when you started beating the Tartaurus out
of those slavers, at that moment I knew." "Knew what?" Gabrielle asked gently, her green eyes looking up at me. "I knew that you were the bravest girl I'd ever seen, braver than even me." "Oh, Xena." Gabrielle thought I was teasing her. "I mean it, Gabrielle," I continued. "Me, Xena, the Warrior Princess, I gave up. Then here comes this tiny thing that knew she was never going to win a fight against grown men, but that didn't stop her from trying. That's why you will always be my source, Gabrielle. Whenever I need strength all I ever have to do is think of you and I find a force available that I didn't have before. You, my friend, are what gives me power in this life." "Do I really do all that, Xena?" I chuckled and pulled the blanket over her shoulder. "Go to sleep, Gabrielle." I said and kissed the top of her head one more time. * * *
"To conquer others is to have power; to conquer yourself is to know the way." Lao Ma's words rang in my head and sudden realization spread over me. There was a difference back in Chin when I last used the power of the chi. I learned the way that Lao Ma was speaking of, lying there on that wooden board, waiting to meet Hades. I remember looking over at Gabrielle and realizing that in the scheme of things, I was really nothing. Every good thing about me was because of Gabrielle... she was my way. That young woman who gave all of herself to me, everyday. She willingly
shared the light of her heart with an old warrior that walked a thin line just this side of Tartaurus. That 's what was different back then... Gabrielle. With all my thoughts and focus on my wife, I could suddenly feel the rush of power as it surged through me like adrenaline. I stood up quickly and crossed the room to the far wall. No one said a word as I stared so hard at the stone and concrete I thought I was going to be able to see through it. "Get back." I said in a low, even voice. I didn't look, but they must have seen the look in my eye because I could hear them moving to the other side of the room. I couldn't keep my arms from trembling as I held back the force that was rushing to get out. I raised both hands; arms extended in front of me, and felt a tremendous pressure in my chest, swirling around like a whirlpool. My eyes narrowed to slits and my body jerked as the enormous bolt of energy was launched from my hands. I cried out at the almost cathartic release and watched in fascination as stone, mortar, and rock wall were blown backward. The dust settled and no one was more amazed than I was. I shuddered a little to think that the power of my love for Gabrielle could be harnessed in such a way. Frankly, something this strong worried me a little and I wasn't in a hurry to do it again. In the past I thought it was solely because of Lao Ma's teachings that I had this ability. Now, knowing the truth, it doesn't surprise me. I have always said that it is because of Gabrielle that I do any good in this world at all. * * *
"Well, you guys coming, or not?" I turned around to face an awestruck audience of three. Even Hera looked a tad impressed.
"Ep, you better keep her back her until Apollo shows." I indicated the Goddess on the floor. Eponin handed me the waterskin, now filled with the Elixir. "Xena... that was the most incredible thing I've ever seen." "Nah, it was nothin'." I replied with a wink before making my way out to the caverns. I had one last item from my pack of toys and I definitely knew what this one was for. I reached into the small leather pouch at my waist and pulled out a thin metallic band. It was the exact replica of the one Gabrielle received from her father. Apollo gave it to me before we left and told me to use it when we were ready to return home. I knew I was going to feel a little foolish doing this and I kind of wondered why he didn't enchant the ring differently, but it was only a word. "Father." I called out. In only took a heartbeat and I figured that with Hera out of commission, he must have been waiting for my call. When the God materialized he held a figure in his arms. For a moment panic seized me as I thought it might be Gabrielle. As he knelt to the ground I could see that the woman he carried was Artemis. She looked pretty bad. There was a large gash on her head and a similar wound along her ribs. Her face was a mass of cuts and bruises and it was obvious that Hera did a number on her. I knelt down beside the two and Apollo reached out and took my hand in his own, squeezing it tightly. I felt I was looking into Gabrielle's own green eyes when I gave him a slightly embarrassed smile. "I knew, Xena... I just knew you would be the one to save us all." He said in a voice filled with emotion. I handed him the waterskin and he looked at it strangely. "It's a long story, but it's the Elixir." I assured him.
Apollo uncorked the skin and gently tipped the flask forward. One drop was all the God said that it would take and he was right. The single drop of liquid fell onto Artemis' lips and the effect was immediate. I'm not sure I would have completely believed this part of the story if I hadn't seen it for myself. Her bruises began to fade and quickly disappear, followed by the injury to her side. When the head wound closed itself and rapidly shrunk away to nothing, the Goddess' dark eyelashes fluttered open. Apollo handed me the waterskin and wrapped his arms around his twin. It took Artemis a second to figure out what happened, but her gray eyes warmed at the site of her beloved brother. When she turned to see me she smiled and I held out a hand to help her rise to her feet. She was a little wobbly, but near death experiences will do that to you and I told her so. "Xena... why am I not surprised to see you here?" She said and then indicated my own battered face. "Hey, trouble just seems to show up when I do, what can I say?" I replied, nonchalantly. Ares showed up next, followed by the same group who popped into the Queen's hut that morning. Right now, that day seemed like an eternity ago. "Where is she?" Artemis asked, the color returning to her face and then some. Autolycus stepped back toward the opening in the rubble, trying to stay out of the way. Artemis caught the movement and drew the blade at her hip. It was probably foolish, but I stopped her in much the same manner that I intercepted Eponin earlier. "Move out of my way, Xena." "Artemis I can't let you do that. She's completely helpless in that room." I reasoned. "As helpless as you will be if you enter." Apollo explained. "Let it go, sister.
We have already won." Artemis slowly thrust her short sword back into its scabbard with a heavy sigh. I knew how she felt. Revenge is a hard thing for a warrior to walk away from. "My Amazons!" Artemis cried out and dematerialized before our eyes. "She'll be back in a moment as soon as she learns that they're fine." Apollo seemed to find it necessary to explain his sister's hasty departure. "So, has anyone come up with any brilliant ideas to get them out of here?" Ares jerked a thumb in my direction. I raised an eyebrow in Apollo's direction. "Come--up--with any ideas?" I enunciated slowly. A few of the Gods shifted around nervously. "We've run into something that I didn't anticipate." Apollo said. * * *
"Gabrielle... wake up, my Queen." Gabrielle yawned and stretched to the smiles of the women in the hut. The green eyes opened in wonder and surprise at the sight before her. "Artemis!" The Goddess sat down on the edge of the bed and wrapped her arms around her niece. Pulling away, Gabrielle opened her mouth to speak. "She is fine." Artemis anticipated the young Queen's question. Tears filled the Queen's green eyes. "She did it then? I just knew she
would." "Yes, she most certainly did. Did you know that you are married to the most wonderful woman in the Known World?" Artemis asked. Gabrielle did what was so naturally her. She blushed and smiled at her aunt. "Yes, I know that already, but thanks for saying it." "I have to go back now, it seems we've run into a snag." Gabrielle looked worried and the Goddess reassured her. "It's nothing that can't be fixed. It's just that I left a bunch of men in charge and you know how that can be." The Queen laughed and Artemis touched gentle fingertips to the young blonde's cheek. "Now, you better get out of this bed, my Queen. Take a bath and put on something very attractive because I'm going to be sending your warrior home shortly." At that, Artemis kissed her niece's forehead and was gone. * * *
"It's not something I knew would happen, Xena... just give me a moment and I'll thing of something." Apollo was saying to me just as Artemis popped back in. Artemis took one look at my face and turned to her brother. "I take it she knows." "She does," I said, "and she's not happy."
"It seems as if the caverns here on Delos render us, while not powerless, a little lacking. We can transport ourselves, but don't have the power to send anyone else." Apollo explained to his sister. "I know, I heard your thoughts, brother. I have a simple solution." Everyone looked at Artemis, especially me. "No one of us has enough power to do the trick, but there is a way for each of us to give you a small fraction of our power. With a little of all of our strength in you, you will have the ability to transport yourself and your friends back in the same way as my brother sent you here." Artemis explained to me. I know what my face looked like at that moment and it wasn't pleasant. There wasn't an immortal in the room that didn't know that getting any kind of godly powers was the last thing in this life that I wanted. "Xena?" Artemis asked finally. My mouth remained closed and I was weighing the options. The only thing that made up my mind was Artemis. "Xena... Gabrielle is waiting for you." "Oh, you Gods play dirty." I smirked. "Well, I guess beggars can't be choosers. Let's do it." The six Gods stood in a circle and placed their right hands into the middle of the circle. They all touched hands and a warm glow began in each of their chests until the light moved down their arms. When it released itself into a burst of blinding light at their hands, Apollo scooped up the pulsating sphere and came toward me. "Ready?" he asked. I nodded.
"It will be much more intense than the last time. "Do it." Apollo held the ball of light in his hand and took my hand in his own. The light felt warm, but not painful. I could feel it worming its way up my arm before I even saw the flash when it entered my chest, feeling like it was exploding into a thousand pieces and spreading rapidly throughout my body. I sunk to my knees at the intensity. "Good Gods!" I exclaimed as I was helped back up again. My body felt like an over strung bow. It felt... I didn't think I could describe it. I could see out of my eye too. Before my eye was almost swollen shut and now; not one ache or pain. "Kind of makes you want to be a God, huh?" Ares gloated. I just glared. I was in a hurry to be away from here. I had a strange fluttering in my belly and a growing ache in my groin, which I attributed to knowing I would be with Gabrielle in a few short moments. "Watch out... it'll make ya as horny as all get out." Ares sounded off again. "Well, if it does, leather boy, I have a feeling you'll be the last person she asks to relieve it for her." Artemis grinned as she one-upped the God of War. "Allright can we get this show on the road." I interrupted. "Ep, Auto!" I shouted for my companions. The growing ache between my legs was getting downright urgent. "Xena... I owe you my life, thank you." Artemis thanked me. I didn't expect that and so simply clasped hands and mumbled something unintelligible. She said something about seeing us in the village later and disappeared. As if on cue the others took off and Apollo and Ares were the only ones left. "What do I do with her?" Eponin asked Apollo and nodded her head back
toward Hera. "I think we'll let Zeus deal with her." Apollo replied. "We owe the three of you a debt of gratitude." He finished as Autolycus came into view. I noticed the thief was a bit chunky around the middle and I rolled my eyes. "Auto... put them back." "Aw, Xena... the place is lousy with them, who's gonna miss a few rocks." he responded. I arched an eyebrow impatiently and he opened his shirt and tossed the diamonds out. Apollo laughed at my friend's actions. He bent down and retrieved two of the larger stones and held them out to Ep and Auto. "A small reward." "Thanks but no thanks." Ep replied. "I'd probably just get into trouble with some girl over it." "I think I'll sell mine and get into trouble with a lot of girls," Auto said, then caught my disapproving glare. "On second thought," Auto began again. "I couldn't possible accept anything, it was after all for the greater good." He spat the last two words in my direction. I chuckled and turned to Apollo. "So, what do I need to do?" "It's simple. You just picture where you want to be and that's where you'll end up." He answered. "Wait a minute... you mean you're powering us back?" Ep asked. I think I was as afraid as she was. "Don't worry... piece of cake." I lied. "I sure hope so," Auto added. "I'd hate to get there and find out you left an
important piece of me behind." "You're telling me." I whispered under my breath. "Uhm, you better tell her that last thing." Ares nudged Apollo. Apollo looked stricken. "Didn't Artemis--" "Nope." Ares answered smugly. Apollo pulled me away from my two companions and tried to say something, but his face was red and he stammered a lot. "He's trying to say don't nail the irritating little blonde as soon as you get back." Ares jumped in. Apollo glared at his brother. "What he means, Xena, is that... well with the power... it's very... potent... even for women. You might want to... well, wait just to be sure." I just nodded like I understood what in the world he was talking about. So, he was trying to say that I'd have some residual power left for a while... big deal. Truth was, all I could focus on was the rather intense need to see my wife. * * *
It wasn't so bad; I could get used to this kind of travel. Hey, and nobody threw up this time, we must be getting better, I thought as we made a landing in the middle of the Amazon village. We were given a hero's welcome, the likes of which I am sure Hercules never even saw. Amid all the noise and back slapping the door to the Queen's hut opened. No one heard the door actually open, but all eyes were drawn that way anyway. I turned and thought I would surely never breath again. Gabrielle
stood in the doorway looking as breathtaking and regal as any Goddess. The outfit she was wearing, or not wearing depending on how you looked at it, was my favorite. The same fawn colored doeskin that she was wearing the night she first seduced me. One slim piece of leather barely covered her breasts, and the loincloth touched the ground in front and behind. Gabrielle stood there and I realized that she was waiting for me to come to her. If anyone expected me to do anything different then they didn't know me very well. I just about ran across the compound and flew up the half a dozen steps in two long strides. I swept the small figure into my harms and held to her tightly. "I missed you, my heart." I whispered. "Missed you too, Warrior." Gabrielle returned and I felt the soft breath from her response against my cheek. Now who would have thought that nothing more than the sweet scent of her breath so close to me would send me into such a tailspin? The whole world narrowed down to this porch and this woman in my arms. Nothing else in life existed for me. That ache between my legs returned with a vengeance. I leaned down and kissed my wife in a way that she could not possible mistake for anything but what it was. It was my, I need you and I need you now kiss. Gabrielle pulled back and those beautiful emerald eyes, that I thought I might never see again, sparkled back up at me. "Yes," she responded softly to my unspoken plea. I couldn't hold back any longer as I swept her up into my arms and entered our hut, slamming the door closed with my foot. "Well," Ephiny began, watching the door slam close. "I think we'd best get some drinks and music going because I think it's going to be a very noisy night." She laughed.
* * *
I remember thinking for a very brief moment about what Ares and Apollo told me. Something about not making love to Gabrielle right away, but I couldn't remember if they said why. It's very hard to remember anything when an Amazon Queen has her tongue in your mouth and her hand in your breeches. I think we got into this position so fast by me saying something about not being able to wait. Now I had my back up against the door as I prepared to be taken by my wild young Queen while I was still standing there fully clothed. "Oh Gods, Brie." My head slammed against the wooden door as I groaned in a mixture of pleasure and relief. The pounding ache at my center turned into a burning need and Gabrielle's fingers were taking the edge off of it quite nicely. I sounded like my wife when I came and it did cross my mind that I should be embarrassed or that I should at least be a little more quiet, but neither thought was getting through right now. Gabrielle never stopped the motion of her hand and the slow fuck brought me quickly to another climax. By the time I reached the third, my knees were telling me, for Goddess' sake lie down on the bed. We tossed leather and armor all across the room, setting some sort of record for disrobing, I'm sure. I sat on the bed and asked Brie to leave the thong on for now. She looked so incredible with just the tiny patch of leather covering her mound, her very shapely backside exposed to my caresses. Now, usually I end up leading the way in our love making, if for no other reason than I'm bigger and stronger and can usually get my way. Suddenly, though, it was if my brain were between my legs and some other highly sensitive parts of my body. I knew what lust was, hey, I had no morals or
scruples at one point in my life so I took who I wanted when I wanted, but this feeling I had now was beyond normal lust or desire. It was becoming damned uncomfortable. So, I guess that's why when my wife slid to her knees between my legs I not only didn't stop her, I encouraged her. There was no pretense, no teasing arousal. Gabrielle was a smart woman and I'm sure she could see that my need went way beyond foreplay at this very moment. I did manage to remember Apollo's warning and it struck me that was the reason why I was so damned insatiable... must be the power they gave me. I wanted to warn Brie that this could go on for a while. "Brie... honey... The Gods gave me this, oh, I don't know... some power and I really shouldn't be doing all this yet. I mean, that's what your father said. He said I should wait and Gods, I think I'd die if I had to wait... do you mind if I'm a little... I don't know... ravenous?" I panted and looked down. She moved closer to me, and the minute I saw that lovely pink tongue spear out of her mouth, I was a goner. I groaned and wrapped a hand into those golden locks and pulled her head in the rest of the way. Situating her right where I needed her the most. The feeling... even the sound of her licking at my sex was extraordinary. I felt instant relief from the pounding ache that was consuming me and within moments I came. Of course, just because I was finished rather quickly didn't mean my Queen had any intention of finishing with me. Okay, now I admit I could be considered pretty whipped where Gabrielle is concerned. I mean, if Brie wanted some, well, day or night... I'd be there, ready and willing. I have, however, never been a complete slave to my desire before. If I had to, I could say no. Not this time, though. Gabrielle continued to take in the abundant wetness between my thighs and I could no more have stopped her than I could keep night from descending. I lost count of the number of orgasms my wife's talented tongue brought me to. I was finally sated; well that might be pushing it. Let's just say the edge was taken off. I picked Gabrielle off the floor and placed her on the bed,
covering her body with my own. I kissed the lips that had my own taste on them and that started a burning fire all over again. No part of my beautiful wife's body went untouched by my hands, my lips and tongue. By the time my shoulders were situated between her legs, the small patch of leather between her legs was soaked. I used the tip of my tongue to caress her all along the edge of the drenched garment and she shivered and pressed her hips toward my face. "Please... Xe, I didn't tease you." "No, you certainly didn't, my heart. Thank you." Without further delay I wrapped two fingers around the thin tie of the thong and with one strong tug the material was in my hand and I tossed it to the end of the bed. The scent that had previously been contained was now released and the fragrance of my wife's need just about undid me. I buried my face in that wetness and ate and drank like it was ambrosia. My hand found its way to my own center and I touched myself, circling and sliding my fingers across my own need in time to the rhythmic way Gabrielle's hips pushed against my tongue. When she sped up the movement of those thrusting hips, I increased the movement of my own fingers. Gabrielle's cry at her release was like music to my ears as I let myself go simultaneously. I moved up to hold the still quivering woman of my heart. Gabrielle's legs wrapped around me tightly, which only served to press my mound against hers. That's all the encouragement I needed. I began a slow, sensual grind against already sensitive flesh. "Oh Gods, Xe... yes." I smiled and kissed her again, our tongues only reminding us of the soft, wet flesh that pressed together further south. Gabrielle spread her thighs farther apart and I reached my hand down between us. Spreading my lips apart, I pressed into her again and we both immediately groaned at the feel of the silky wet folds. Gabrielle moved her own hands down to imitate
my action and another jolt of arousal hit me as she opened herself for me and I slid across the heated, velvety flesh. "Baby, don't stop." I pleaded, as my wife lifted and rocked her hips in counter rhythm to my own. It might have been my own sex filled imagination but I swear I could feel every fold, every nuance and texture as I slid against her wet flesh. When we sped up our movement it happened as if we were one, both our minds linked much the same way as our flesh. I could feel her increasing wetness and I wrapped my lips around a very erect nipple, sucking harder when I felt the centers of our desire rubbing against one another. We both climaxed in what seemed like a blinding flash. There was no light or otherworldly effects, but when I closed my eyes, the sparkling lights and the colors were definitely there. I lifted myself up onto my hands and pressed myself into Gabrielle firmly until I could feel her convulse against me as she came again. I groaned loudly at the feel of her trembling body and felt a warm rush of liquid flow from me at another release. I could feel my essence overflow onto Gabrielle, only to be swallowed up by her open sex. I eased my body down and kissed Gabrielle's cheek. "Thank you." She mumbled, still trying to get her breath back. I smiled and waited a few moments and kissed her again. I pressed my lips so softly against hers that she opened her eyes at my tenderness. "Hi, honey... I'm home." I said quietly. Brie started laughing first, which was contagious enough for me to begin. We ended up collapsing into one another's arms, blissfully sated, laughing until we cried. * * *
"Okay that's it Brie... you're worrying me." I said to my wife who happened to be hung over the rail of our porch, tossing up her morning meal. I helped her back inside and she washed her mouth out and brushed her teeth. I gave her a few mint leaves to chew on and prepared to fix her a tea to settle her stomach. "I'm sure it's just a stomach thing going around, maybe some residual effects of the spell." Gabrielle tried to explain. "That was two moons ago, Brie. You are going to see Sartori and it's going to be this morning." I added. I turned and looked at her with my best no nonsense glare. "Yes, Xena." She said in defeat. Walking across the compound, hand in hand, I had to admit that I did feel comfortable in this village. It was the one spot in the Known World where I knew that people cared about us and we didn't have to hide who we were, our feelings for one another, or my past. When we arrived at Sartori's hut the healer who, to Gabrielle's great joy, finally started calling her by her first name, welcomed us. My wife explained how she was feeling of late and Sartori listened. "Do you feel nauseous at any other time?" "Nope," Gabrielle replied. "It seems to only happen after my morning meal... sometimes it's as soon as I wake up, then blech." The motion of Gabrielle's hand indicated what came next. "Are you more tired than usual?" "Well, yes as a matter of fact I am." Gabrielle started to look a little worried herself now and that worried me.
"Do you know something, Sartori?" I asked and the healer looked at me in the strangest way. "Uhm, why don't you step outside for a few moments, Xena, and let me examine Gabrielle." The healer replied. I looked at the healer and then at Gabrielle. Now I was really worried. "I'll be allright, Xe." Gabrielle squeezed my hand and so I reluctantly rose and left the hut. Within moments Eponin wandered up. "Hey there, tall, dark, and deadly... what's the scoop with Gabrielle?" Just as I opened my mouth to speak Ephiny walked up as well. "Is Gabrielle allright?" I shook my head. "You Amazons are worse than old women. Gossip moves like wildfire around here. Actually she's just got a bit of an upset stomach... probably something that's going around." I finished, sitting down on the bench outside the hut. "Would you like a little company while you wait?" Ephiny asked, placing her hand on my shoulder. I looked up the two women, concern visible in their faces, and nodded nervously. * * *
"Well?" Gabrielle asked as she finished refastening her skirt. "Gabrielle... have you missed your time of the moon, say the last few times?" Sartori began.
"Well, as a matter of fact the last two, but I thought it was probably some lingering effects of the sickness. It's not?" "Have you ever been late before or missed it completely?" "Never." Gabrielle answered and Sartori suddenly realized just how young her Queen really was. "Is it something terrible?" the Queen asked and Sartori chuckled, then smiled. "No, Gabrielle, it's something wonderful, but I'm not sure how it happened, which is none of my business, and I'm also not sure how to tell you. Actually, Gabrielle, you're a bright girl... I bet you can figure it out." Gabrielle wasn't so worried now that Sartori seemed relieved. The healer actually appeared glad. See I told Xe I was allright. The blonde's brows furrowed together and thought about this whole thing. She was young, but she wasn't a complete idiot. She was sick in the morning, tired all the time, and she'd missed her last two cycles. She ate like there was no tomorrow, but that was nothing new. Now that she thought about it, though, her skirt was a little tighter around the middle than usual. Gabrielle laughed slightly. "Well, if I didn't know any better I'd say I was--" Gabrielle looked up into Sartori's smiling face and froze. "Oh Tori, I can't be... I don't know how such a thing could have happened. I mean, I know how it happens; I just don't know how it happened to me! I haven't... I would never... oh Gods, Xena's going to freak!" Gabrielle's mind searched for an answer. She just knew that Xena would never believe this and think she'd cheated on her. Xena was the only one she'd been to bed with in a long time, like almost ever! When her wife returned from the mission to obtain the Elixir, it was the first time they'd been together since they arrived in the village. Gods, that was one
incredible night! Xena was absolutely insatiable... she had the
constitution of a God! Gabrielle looked up at the healer in astonishment as realization flooded over her. "Oh, it's not possible." She said aloud to a confused Sartori.
It did feel like it at the time though, didn't it? Gabrielle asked herself as she placed the flat of her hand over her belly. The last time they made love the day of Xena's return. When their release washed over them, Gabrielle had the strangest feeling, like she could feel life surging into and through her. Then from a place far in the back of her memory she replayed what Xena said that day, trying to tell Gabrielle something about what Apollo warned her about.
"Brie... honey... The Gods gave me this, oh, I don't know... some power and I really shouldn't be doing all this yet. I mean, that's what your father said. He said I should wait and Gods, I think I'd die if I had to wait... do you mind if I'm a little... I don't know... ravenous?" I panted and looked down. How could she not have told me? Gabrielle fumed to herself. "I'm simply going to kill her!" the Queen said aloud. Turning toward the doorway she stood there and shouted. "Xena!" Sartori watched as Gabrielle's features clouded over and she arched an eyebrow high up under her blonde bangs. The young Queen folded her arms across her chest and waited. Within a heartbeat I was through the door, fear running through me at Gabrielle's shout. "Brie?" I took in my wife's demeanor and knew this wasn't going to go well for me. Ephiny and Eponin bumped into me as they ran in to back me up. Yea, that's perfect, all a warrior wants is for her friends to be there when she's about to get reamed by her wife for some inexcusable thing she's done.
"Honey?" I asked, not feeling the endearment was going to get me out of whatever Gabrielle found that I was guilty of. "Gabrielle, what is it... what's wrong?" I asked, knowing, like any good warrior wife would, that whatever was making her so unhappy was my fault any way you looked at it. "I'm going to have a baby!" Gabrielle said in a deep even tone. I knew I was in some serious centaur stuff now because my wife only uses that husky tone when we're in bed or when I am so dead. Then I realized what she just said. "You're what?" I said with a highly improbable laugh. "A baby... with child... up the duff! How many ways do you want me to phrase it for you? You and I are having a child together. So, Xena... why don't you explain to me how this happened?" "I--" I stopped and looked around the room and wondered myself. Then all of a sudden I knew the only way it could have happened and my blood began to boil. "Oh, no," Gabrielle stared at me, obviously knowing where my mind was headed. "Guess again. Go back to the day a certain Warrior Princess got home from a certain mission." I looked at her as though she'd lost her mind. Staring down at my boots, I remembered that day, Gods, I don't think I'll ever forget it, I couldn't walk without it hurting for three days. It was actually pretty incredible, I couldn't get enough and all due to that little burst of power that--Oh, shit! Gabrielle had a way of reading my mind as well as my face and when I looked up at her, she had sort of a look of triumph across her own features. "I thought... he said that I probably shouldn't... but then he didn't say why... I mean, he said potent, but I figured... I never even thought about... I mean who knew?"
I stammered badly as I realized just what Apollo's admonition meant. He didn't mean that I would have an unquenchable appetite for my wife... that just happened as a side effect. When he said potent, he meant that I would be carrying this powerful seed and my sweet Gabrielle could very well be ripe for the planting. That's why he warned me to wait. Hades, that warning was about as clear as the Styx. Everybody realized what was going on by this time and Sartori still smiled, Eponin snorted at my obviously pathetic attempts at an explanation, Ephiny hid her grin under a well placed hand. I should have been on my knees begging Gabrielle's forgiveness for not warning her about what her father said; I should have looked contrite, or even ashamed. All I could manage, though was this huge, shit-eating grin when I thought about the fact that Gabrielle was pregnant with my child. Gabrielle seemed supremely satisfied that I made a fool of myself in front of our friends and I could tell by the way the corners of her mouth pulled up that she was fighting off a smile. "This is a good thing, though... right?" Gabrielle asked hesitantly. My grin grew wider if that was possible and I moved to take her in my arms. "This is a very good thing, my heart." I said. That's when she punched me in the stomach. Gods, I have to remember to wear my armor more when we're in the village. "What do you have to say for yourself, Warrior?" she looked up at me with more than a hint of amusement in those green eyes. Okay this is your chance. Say what she wants to hear. Something all mushy and sentimental, kind of flowery like those poems she likes to read. You're Xena, the Warrior Princess... come on you eloquent devil... say it. "Oops?" I shrugged.
I was pathetic when it came to words and she understood that. I could tell that she saw it in my eyes, though, that she would always be the Queen of my heart. She didn't care what the words I voiced to her were. And, in the end it didn't matter what I said... she stood up on her tiptoes and kissed me anyway. THE END
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, GABRIELLE DISCLAIMER:
Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, etc. are ©copyright MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. I don’t own them, I just play with them for a while and, like the good girl I am, I put them back when I’m done…okay, they get a little worn, but hey…I play hard! Absolutely no Copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fiction. It’s intended as flattery toward the creators and actors of the characters. All other characters that appear are ©copyright
[email protected] This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies may be made for private use only and I’d appreciate if you included all copyright notices and this disclaimer. VIOLENCE WARNING: That isn’t really where this one is going. SEX: Thank you, I accept. Uhm…I mean, it is Xena and Gabrielle, after all. This is my version of a PWP…you
know the kind of story we bards like to write just as an excuse for Xena & Gabrielle to have some great sex! This story shows consensual love/sex between two adult females. Consider yourself warned if you find that kind of thing offensive. UNDERAGE WARNING: Hey, the Supreme Court said in Reno v. American Civil Liberties Union (1997) that
laws against making available, online, certain “indecent” materials for those under 18 was unconstitutional… look it up! Besides, this is perfectly “decent.” I only know how others feel about my stories from feedback. Let me know what you think about it… homophobes need not apply, however. I’m at:
[email protected] First of all, this story is a part of the Queen series and starts about four weeks after “The Queen of My Heart.” This is a little tidbit that celebrates a couple of things. The Summer Solstice is Xena and Gabrielle’s first anniversary and this just happens to be the Warrior’s present to her bard. It also takes care of one of Xena’s biggest desires…to have been Gabrielle’s first lover. So, what would happen if Xena had the ability to go back to that day? You know…the infamous one when Perdicus asked Gabrielle to marry him? Would said Warrior finally swallow her pride and tell the bard about her feelings, or will she let history repeat itself?
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, GABRIELLE
I WATCHED AS Gabrielle pushed the food around on her plate. I knew something was wrong, but couldn’t figure out what and with a pregnant woman…Gods, it could be anything. Of course, I knew that whatever it was, it was my fault. I am an exceptional warrior and I like to consider myself a good wife. Being a good warrior wife I know that when the woman who is carrying my child is bothered, angry, sad, whatever…chances are it’s my fault. I’ve done something stupid, like looking at another woman with more than passing interest or not holding her hand long enough during the noon meal. She obviously gave me the look, but I must have missed it. So, now I have to commit the most unpardonable of sins. I have to ask what is bothering her instead of reading her mind like she thinks I should be able to. “Brie, what’s wrong?” I ask and lean back in my chair in case I should have to duck quickly. She lifted her head and those beautiful green eyes were filled with tears. “I’m fat…huge.” She replied. “Gabrielle, you’re barely showing yet. You are by no stretch of the
imagination, fat.” I responded with an amused chuckle. Gods this girl could be dramatic. “I will be though, just in time for our first anniversary. I’ll be fat and you’ll be around all these gorgeous Amazons…” “Okay, time out. Come here, my heart.” I took Gabrielle’s hand and pulled her into my lap. Her hormones were taking her on one wild emotional ride lately, so I attempted to let my kiss and my protective embrace speak for me. I tried to remember what I used to do to get through these feelings when I was carrying Solan. Okay, well I used to kill people and raid villages…guess that won’t work here. “First off I think we should establish the fact that you will not be fat. You’re carrying a child, you’re just going to look…uhm…” “Fat.” She finished dejectedly. “Not fat. Brie, you’re going to look pregnant, but you shouldn’t be ashamed of it. You’ll get bigger with our child…our child, my heart. Did you ever think we would be able to say something like that? Besides, there is no way you could ever look anything but sexy to me!” I added this last and wiggled my eyebrows, reaching in to nuzzle the soft skin of her neck. Gabrielle couldn’t help but let out a small giggle. “You mean to say you would find me sexy…attractive?” “Oh, yea.” I answered quickly and I meant it. “Even if I was eight moons along?” my wife asked in disbelief. “I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off of you.” “You, my Warrior, have some very kinky ideas running around up there,” Gabrielle pointed a finger at the top of my head. “And, you’re just figuring this out?” I leered.
Gabrielle laughed out loud and squirmed in my embrace as I moved my kisses down her chest. “Xe? Even on our anniversary, you’ll find me attractive?” she suddenly asked in a small voice. So that’s what this was really about. It was all tied up with our anniversary. We were married on the Summer Solstice and wanted to spend the anniversary of our joining in the Amazon village. Gabrielle’s sister Amazon’s, who I might add would do anything for a good party, already began preparations for a large celebration. Being a little distracted for the last fortnight; I didn’t even have a gift for my wife yet…I know, bad warrior. “Gabrielle, I don’t care if it turns out that you’re carrying twins. On our anniversary I will think the same thing that I do every single time I look at you. That you are the most beautiful woman in the world and how lucky I am that you picked me.” “Oh, Xe.” Gabrielle said wrapping her arms around my neck. I was proud of myself and breathed a sigh of relief. Okay, that was the right answer. Not that I didn’t absolutely believe the words I voiced, but these days making my wife believe that it was the truth was another story. I was rewarded with a kiss that made me want to be out of my leathers in a hurry. Gabrielle’s tongue and her hands were suddenly everywhere at once. The heat started between my legs and soon enveloped my whole body. I barely had enough strength left to stand and maneuver us both onto the bed. I think my brain must go into a total meltdown when Gabrielle begins to make love to me. Either that or she’s been taking some sleight of hand lessons from Autolycus, because before I knew it, my clothes were in a heap on the floor, and I couldn’t even remember how it happened. Before I could concentrate on how I wanted to take my wife, she had me on my back in a completely submissive posture. In this time of hormones running amuck, Gabrielle could wake up one
morning and could have all the tenderness of a rampaging cyclone. On those kinds of days she could make Velasca look like a Hestian Priestess. Then there were times like the one we were experiencing right now. When her body couldn’t seem to give, or receive for that matter, enough pleasure. My young Queen was in an extremely rewarding mood, and I was more than happy to be the recipient of all that affection. Oh, yes, I thought as I closed my eyes in sensual delight. I feel very rewarded. * * *
“Ep, you are no help at all.” I commented to my friend as I easily parried her sword thrust. “Hey, you want to spar, I’m your woman. If it’s advice on your love life, go ask another Amazon.” The warrior responded the sound of metal meeting metal resounding across the practice field. “I don’t need that kind of advice, my love life is just fine.” “So, I heard last night. As a matter of fact the whole village heard last night.” Eponin stopped all movement and looked me straight in the eye. “She made you scream, Xena. I mean, she had you begging; I heard it. Come on…share with another warrior. What does she do that could possibly make you, the Warrior Princess scream?” “Honorable warriors don’t kiss and tell.” I realized our sparring session was at an end and I picked up a rag from the ground and began to wipe my blade clean. “Aw, come on, Xena.” “Warriors don’t whine either, Ep.” I continued cleaning my blade realizing I was driving my friend crazy. “You’d whine too if you hadn’t been with a woman for nearly a whole
season.” She responded. “A whole season?! Gods, Ep…another moon or two and technically you’ll be a virgin again.” I couldn’t help but laugh at my friend’s dilemma. I know it seemed cruel, but that’s the kind of relationship Ep and I had. We loved being able to take cheap shots at each other. “Okay, how about a trade?” she asked. “Trade? For what?” “I’ll tell you the perfect gift that will not only make you a happy woman, but will score you many major points with your wife.” Eponin answered. Well, I couldn’t resist this one. I love Gabrielle with all my heart and there will never be another for me, but because I can be more warrior than woman some days, I end up in Gabrielle’s doghouse a lot. A gift that would make me happy plus earn points I could store up for one of those “doghouse” days? Whatever my Amazon friend was asking, I was in for. “Okay, sold. What do you want in return?” I asked suspiciously. “I want to know, just one little thing that Gabrielle does to make someone like you beg and scream for mercy.” “Forget it.” I moved to walk away. If my wife ever found out that I was talking about our sex life, there wouldn’t be a safe enough place for me to hide. That doghouse would need a big bed, because I’d be sleeping there for a good long time. “Okay, but don’t forget that you gave up the chance to make Gabrielle’s dreams come true.” Ep’s voice followed after me. That stopped me in my tracks. Gods, I was so whipped. It never mattered what needed to be done, I would do it just to make my bard happy. I turned around and Ep already had a look of triumph on her face. I wiped the look off her face with one of my own. I grabbed her by the neck of her tunic and
pulled her into a copse of trees, looking around to make sure we wouldn’t be overheard. “You realize that if my wife, your Queen, ever finds out I told you this we’re both toast.” I sneered. “I’ll take it to the grave.” She replied. I moved in closer. “If you don’t, I’ll take you to the grave.” I hissed, and she swallowed hard. “Okay, you first.” I said as I let her go. She wasn’t in a position to argue so she began. “Well, you know how you’ve said it kind of bugs you not to have been Gabrielle’s first?” I folded my arms and glared at her. “And, you reminding me of that fact is supposed to make me feel better how?” “Calm down and listen. What if you could go back to the day when Perdicus married Gabrielle? You could tell her you love her and, wham! Happy ending.” I just continued to stare at her. “What if I just become the Queen of Egypt and send for her on my barge?” “Oh, that’s very funny, did you have to pay extra for that sense of humor?” Eponin answered. “Look, Xena, you and Gabrielle have both done Adia’s dreamscape thing. You’ve even done it without Adia’s herbs on occasion. I’m saying that you and Gabrielle go back to that day in your dreamscape.” I continued to stare at Ep’s victorious smile and slowly the idea began to take on a certain appeal. It’s true that I have regretted nothing more than when I gave Gabrielle up to a man that she didn’t completely love all because of my own fear and pride. Some nights, as I held my bard, I thought of little else. So, what if I could go back and change it all? Just like when we healed Gabrielle’s dreamscape the very first time, it wouldn’t change the reality, but it would alter our perception of it. If it worked out the
way I anticipated, then to Gabrielle and I, her first experience would always have been with me. “Well?” Eponin cocked her head slightly trying to meet my hidden gaze. When I looked up I had a broad smile across my face. “I like it,” was all I said. “Excellent! Okay, give it up, warrior.” “Okay, you sure you’re ready for this?” I teased. “Come on, Xena.” “Okay, just remember, this is Gabrielle’s own unique technique. If she gets wind of this, she’ll know I talked and that will make her extremely unhappy. And do you know what happens when Gabrielle is unhappy?” “You get unhappy?” Ep replied, pretty sure that was the right answer. “Yup. And, do you know what happens if I get unhappy?” “I get dead.” she stated the obvious. “You catch on quick, my friend.” We turned and walked farther away from the practice field, toward the baths to clean up. “Okay, Xena, tell me.” Eponin was practically begging. “Well, it’s like this,” I pulled her closer and spoke under my breath into her ear. “How?” she asked, pulling away. “Her teeth.” I answered and kept walking.
“Get out!” the Amazon replied. “Isn’t that dangerous?” “It can be if you’re not careful…and if you buck around too much.” I answered nonchalantly. “That’s not the best part, though. You see…” I moved closer to her again as a group of young women passed us headed toward the practice field, and whispered the rest. “Gabrielle does that?! Using what?” “Oh, anything that’s handy.” I grinned at the temporarily stunned Amazon. “Never underestimate the value of a good toy.” I added. I don’t know if she was more shocked at our technique or the fact that her mind was probably conjuring up a vision of my sweet and innocent looking Gabrielle performing said maneuver. Eponin veered right as we approached the warm spring baths, housed in the caverns just ahead. “Hey, I thought we were going to get cleaned up?” I asked as she walked away from me. “You go on. I’m going down to the lake for my bath…the nice cold lake.” I laughed out loud at my friend’s retreating figure. Poor Ep. She needed a woman and she needed one soon. * * *
“Adia…I can’t believe you’d turn me down after all Gabrielle has been through lately.” It was like talking to a stone wall. I spent the last candlemark pleading my case, but the stubborn healer just couldn’t open up her eyes enough to see it my way. The healer, who was every bit as tall and strong as me, simply
stood with her arms folded, shaking her head. Damn, she reminded me a lot of me. “Xena, walking around in the dreamscape is not a game. It’s serious business. Anything can go wrong and if I’m not there to pull you out of it then someone could end up hurt. Doing something like this for your personal pleasure is hardly why I go to the trouble of perfecting my gift.” She finished just as her wife walked in. Once Sartori asked what the commotion was about, Adia and I both clammed up. The small healer had a way, though, and she reminded me of Gabrielle as she openly glared at us. We were both at least a head taller than she was, but that look and the tapping foot caused Adia and I to look at one another and immediately we took turns telling the small healer what the disagreement was about. She listened to the two of us and turned to her mate. “Adia, do you mean to tell me that Xena wants to fulfill a private dream for our Queen and you would refuse her this beautiful gift?” Sartori asked in disbelief. “Yes, but--” “I can’t believe that you would be so heartless as to turn down a request obviously made out of love.” “But, Tori--” “One that could bring such happiness to two people that we care so much about.” “But, you see--” “No buts, my dear wife. This is a request brought to you out of love and from her Highness. If you don’t think that love is worth risking your precious reputation over then perhaps you and your gift would be happier sleeping over in the healer’s hut tonight.”
That said, Sartori turned on her heel and left one very stammering embarrassed wife in her wake. I could afford the luxury of a huge grin, since it was someone else getting dressed down by her wife and not me for a change. “Kind of reminds me of another small blonde I know,” I mentioned. “You’re telling me.” Adia answered as she nervously watched her wife walk away. “I know of what I speak, so don’t take this the wrong way,” I said to the tall healer. “It’s rough to be so whipped.” I grinned and Adia elbowed me in the ribs. “You should know, my friend,” she laughed. “You should know. Okay when do you want this to happen?” “The day of our anniversary, but before the party.” I answered. “Alright, my friend. I’ll mix the herbs together and give them to you the day before the party.” I clasped the healer’s hand and walked away from that hut feeling like my whole world was about to come together. I was going to fulfill a personal fantasy of my own, while giving Gabrielle a present that would live forever as a memory. My palms grew sweaty and suddenly I wondered if swallowing my pride in the dreamscape would be easier than it had been in real life. After all, I never really confessed my love to Gabrielle, until after she seduced me that night here in the village. Once I was reliving the situation in the dreamscape, could I find a way to make my bard realize just how much I wanted her to be with me? Could I convince her that I wanted to love her forever and not just for one night? Suddenly, I was nervous and anticipating the day of the party with a mixture of fear and elation.
* * *
“You look stunning.” I told Gabrielle, as she turned around to look at her own reflection in the mirror. “It’s so beautiful, thank you, Xe.” She said, running over and wrapping her arms around my neck. Yep, that definitely made it all worth it. Gabrielle was only four moons along, but having such a tiny build in the first place, her growing belly began to show right away. She started to feel slightly self-conscious in her somewhat revealing garments and now wore loose fitting tunics. Of course, that didn’t stop everyone that knew her from coming up to her to pat her stomach, but she finally learned to smile politely, and then roll her eyes when they turned their back. Part of my anniversary gift to my wife consisted of the tunic she wore right now. I wrote to my mother and asked her to commission it from a seamstress that I knew in Amphipolis. The woman dealt in Egyptian silk and I knew it would turn out beautifully, which it had. It was emerald green, to match Brie’s eyes, with the royal Amazon crest discreetly sewn into the pattern. My mother had it with her when she arrived for our party yesterday. That was a whole story in itself, trying to explain to my mother just how Gabrielle became pregnant with my child. With a bit of explanation, however, we managed to get the idea across that Cyrene’s first grandchild would indeed be a part of Gabrielle and myself. The best part was when Mom hugged Gabrielle, and through her tears, told the young Queen she was making her the happiest woman in the Known World. Of course, I stood there wondering why Gabrielle was getting all the credit. I mean; I was pretty much responsible for getting her this way in the first place. Okay, Gabrielle was doing the hard part, but still. We just finished our noon meal and, to avoid the heat of the day, the party wasn’t to begin until sundown. For that reason, we weren’t the only ones in
our hut preparing for a short afternoon nap. Most of the village planned on being up until the sun rose, so everyone was trying to catch up on a little rest. Gabrielle seemed determined to disguise the fact that she was dead tired this time everyday, until I explained that it was perfectly normal, considering her pregnancy. I watched as my wife carefully slipped out of the new garment and pulled on her robe, folding the silk top and laying it across the chair to wear later. Adia gave me the herbs that would place us as willing participants in our dreamscape, in a powder form. I explained to her that I didn’t want Gabrielle to know what I was doing, that I wanted it to be a surprise. The powder was tasteless and I easily placed it in the cup of cider, Gabrielle now drank from. I had mine in a bit of port and swallowed it off before beckoning Gabrielle into my embrace. In the winter our favorite spot was on a heap of cushions in front of the small fireplace. During the warm summers we simply tossed the cushions near the head of the bed and relaxed there. I watched as Gabrielle snuggled against me, a large yawn taking over her features. Now came the hard part. Adia explained that the difficulty would be in getting the person who didn’t know about the little scheme to actually meet you in the right dreamscape. They had to be thinking of the same approximate event in time as you, not exactly just roundabout. I picked the point I wanted to start the dream at. I would concentrate on that evening when I caught Perdicus sneaking into our camp, before we even knew Callisto was up to her usual tricks again. If I started us out before we went to sleep that evening, I could ask Gabrielle to be mine before what’s his name even arrived, simple as that. Somehow, I had to get my wife to think of that day, but without causing her pain. The choices Gabrielle made and what happened to that young man at Callisto’s hand were things that still had the power to resurface and bite at Gabrielle occasionally. So, how do you remind the woman you love that she married someone else? Well, as I am so fond of saying to myself, I am a warrior. I can be sneaky, underhanded, smooth, conniving, but I cannot be subtle; it’s just not in my nature. I leave subtlety and tact to my wife. So, I did what I usually do, barrel
in with sword drawn. “I still wish I could have been the first person that you ever experienced pleasure with.” I said, running gentle fingertips along her arm. “Oh Xe, please don’t think like that anymore. We’re together now. Besides,” she continued, turning to look at me with a small smile. “I wasn’t your first either.” I snorted in a combination of laughter and incredulity. “Brie…you would have had to get to me a lot sooner than you did to even be close, you know that. I’m sorry, my heart, it’s not something I’m proud of.” Gabrielle yawned again. I had to steer her off this topic or Goddess knows where we’d end up. “How much sooner?” my wife asked, seriously. “When I was sixteen summers, satisfied?” “Mmm Hmm,” she responded sleepily. “It would have been incredible…making love to you for the first time under the stars.” “I would have been scared to death, I didn’t know anything then.” She mumbled. “I know, that’s part of the fun,” I smiled against the warm skin of her neck. “I would have been very gentle. Remember how beautiful it was that night before Perdicus showed up? The moon was full and the smell of lotus blossoms came down from the mountains on the warm breeze.” I watched as Gabrielle’s lips formed a tiny smile and then her eyes closed and I knew I had her. She was dreaming of that night and I fell into the dreamscape moments behind her.
* * *
“Xena…are you listening to this story at all?” “Huh?” I answered when I heard Gabrielle’s voice, not realizing I was in the dreamscape. “I said, are you listening?” she passed her hand in front of my face and smiled at my uncharacteristic disorientation. “Oh yea, Brie…uh…I mean, Gabrielle, I’m sorry. I guess I got caught up in my thoughts.” “What a surprise.” She replied and smiled at me again. I nearly lost my breath at that smile. “Do you want me to stop or keep going?” she asked. I’m sure she was expecting me to ask her to stop. I could tell by the look of slight disappointment in her face. I used to put that look there quite a bit in the old days and I’ve regretted it every day since then. Perhaps that’s why she nearly stumbled into the fire when I said I’d love to hear it, but could she start from the beginning again. I jumped up and grabbed her around the waist, pulling her back against my body. Without my armor on I’m sure she could feel exactly how my body was reacting to the closeness of hers, even through my leathers. “Are you alright?” I asked softly, enjoying the shiver my whisper against her ear brought to her body. “Uhm…yea, thanks. I guess I tripped.” “Did you hurt yourself?” I answered, not yet releasing my hold on her. Funny thing but she wasn’t exactly acting like she was in a hurry to get away from my embrace. “Uh, maybe I just turned my ankle…I’ll be fine, though.” Gabrielle
stammered. I didn’t think twice about it, that’s the good part of knowing this was a dream. I reached down and scooped Gabrielle into my arms and carried her over to our bedrolls, already spread out. “Let me take a look.” I said as I carried her and gently set her on the blanket. I unlaced her boot and took my time in examining the tender flesh. I ran the tips of my fingers along her skin until she was breathing just a tad faster than normal. This was becoming kind of fun and I smiled up at my companion. Gabrielle’s cheeks held a light pink flush to them and I wondered why I never saw this before. Why was I so convinced that Gabrielle could never love a woman like me? It was there, right in front of me, and I never saw it. I suppose I thought it so outlandish a thought that I was oblivious. “Here, lay back and get comfortable. Can I get you anything?” I asked. “Xena, I can barely feel it, you don’t have to fuss over me. I’ll be alright.” Gabrielle responded to my concern. Actually, I think she thought I was losing my mind. I removed my boots and flopped down next to her. “Okay, story time.” “Xena, are you feeling okay? You’re not going to hit me when I relax are you?” she asked suspiciously. “No!” I answered, adding an offended tinge to my voice. It was true, though, and she was smart enough to see through me. It had only been a fortnight from this point in time when Gabrielle whacked me a good one, sure that I would stop her like I always did. She became rather convinced that I let her catch me unaware, but the truth is that she took me completely by surprise. Gods, the girl almost broke my nose. She definitely bruised my pride.
“Gabrielle, I just wanted to relax and, well…you’re a great bard.” “I am?” “Of course. Now do I get to hear this new story or what?” It was just like it used to be and there was a definite comfort factor, knowing that the pressure was off, that when we woke it would be to a reality where Gabrielle was mine. Lying next to each other, I waited and listened to Gabrielle’s beautiful voice as she wove her tale. I would wait until she was through with her story and I would tell her I loved her and that I never wanted to be without her. Yea, that’s what I’d do. It was hard to lie there and not wrap my arms around Gabrielle as I usually did. It was as much a delight for me to hold Brie as for her to be held. I settled for the knowledge that by morning she would know of my love for her and the best part, she would probably be using most of my body for a pillow. I clasped my hands behind my head and smiled to myself, rather smugly I must admit. The one thing I didn’t anticipate was falling asleep. * * *
Hades! How can you fall asleep in your dream?! I grumbled and raged inside my own head as I quickly put on my boots, realizing that rustle I heard was farm boy walking like a Cyclops through the forest. Well, I missed my opportunity, but he hasn’t asked yet and Gabrielle certainly hasn’t answered, so I still have time. “Hello, Perdicus…not the smartest way to pay us a visit.” Okay, the first time this happened I didn’t hit him, but I let my foot slip a little this time and before I knew it he was sitting on the ground, rubbing his jaw.” “Oops.” I said; realizing Gabrielle was now behind me. “Let me help you
up.” “Perdicus!” Gabrielle exclaimed, my heart immediately ending up in my throat to hear my bard call out anyone else’s name that way. “I just had to see something.” Perdicus started and I knew I didn’t want to hear what was coming next. “What?” Gabrielle asked. “Perdicus! You must be dead on your feet.” I said loudly, stepping between the boy and my wife. “We’ve got an extra blanket,” I said grabbing Gabrielle’s and tossing it into his arms. “Over here, right by the fire…there you go.” I practically pushed him to the ground. “But, I--” he stammered. “Xena’s right,” Gabrielle agreed. “Get some sleep and we can talk in the morning, okay?” Perdicus watched as we settled down on our bedrolls together, he on the other side of the fire, reluctantly lying down. He must have thought there was something odd about that, but I think he was too confused to argue. “Okay.” He muttered. I gave him Gabrielle’s blanket, knowing how cold my bard gets at night. I hit her with the double whammy. She’d not only have to share my blanket, but I could already feel her inching closer against my back. “Thanks, Xena…for being so nice to Perdicus. I know he’s always gotten on your nerves a bit.” Gabrielle whispered in my ear and I felt that warm breath all the way down to my toes. I turned and gave her a little grin, pushing most of the blanket her way. I guess Perdicus had always gotten on my nerves, but I couldn’t very well tell her that. I think for the most part the young man from Potidaea trusted that I would always take good care of Gabrielle, which is more than her parents
thought of me at first. I felt a little bad for hitting him earlier and okay, maybe just a bit guilty at deceiving Gabrielle. Here, she thought I was being nice to the boy and I was simply attempting to shut him up. Gods, this dream certainly wasn’t turning out like I’d planned. * * *
I was up and scouting around for breakfast early. I knew Gabrielle would sleep for a while and Perdicus was still sawing logs when I left the camp. When I returned from a highly unsuccessful fishing venture, the sun was already up. I couldn’t focus on the task at hand so instead of fish I figured I could hunt up a couple of small rabbits. “Aw, shit!” I said out loud. I saw the two empty bedrolls and no one in the camp, and realized that farmer boy was off telling Gabrielle what he planned on saying last night before I interrupted him. They weren’t far off and I stopped a discreet distance away. I never knew what Perdicus said the first time all of this happened, so since it was my dream, I used that to rationalize the fact that I was entitled to hear what this young farmer had to say. I easily climbed into a nearby tree, able to see and hear everything quite well from here. “So, what have you been doing since you left Troy?” Gabrielle asked. “Fighting. That’s all I’ve been doing it seems.”
Yea, well you are supposed to be a soldier, I thought to myself. “After Troy I wandered into another war. One day I killed three men. I started to have dreams about all the men whose lives I’d taken.”
Right…try being me, I’ll show you dreams of regret.
“I couldn’t stand it. One night I had a dagger at my heart…”
Wimp! “…then I saw something.” Perdicus paused. “What?” Gabrielle asked, falling right into his trap. There was nothing I could do but listen. “Your face.” He replied. “Perdicus, I don’t know if I’m really who you think I am. I mean I fight.”
That’s it…you tell him, Brie. “But you never kill, I know that. Gabrielle, we were to be married once, and you decided that wasn’t to be. You were right. I wasn’t ready either, but I am now.”
Oh no! “I love you, and if you’ll take me, I want you to be my wife.”
Son of a Bacchae! The bad part about getting really mad while perched precariously upon a tree limb is that the ground sometimes mysteriously rises up to meet you. I fell right out of that tree and as I hurtled to the dirt, I saw Gabrielle look up. Timing…it’s everything. “I’m sorry I…just excuse me, okay?” Gabrielle said hastily, rushing over to where I fell. By the time I shook off the fall I looked up and found myself staring at Gabrielle’s boots. “Xena? What are you doing?” she asked, standing over me.
I jumped to my feet, rubbing the tender spot on my backside that felt the most impact when I landed. “I was trying to hunt up some rabbits for breakfast.” I mumbled. Gabrielle looked up and I could see by the expression on her face she wanted to believe me, but she was staring high up into the tree then back down at me like I just told her I could sprout wings and fly. “From up there?” she finally asked. What else could I possibly say that wouldn’t make me look like more of an imbecile than I already did? My pride and my dignity all but vanished. I decided to play bad tempered warrior, which was pretty close to the truth by this time, and grumble as I walked away. “You can see ‘em better from up there,” was all I could think to say, as I limped my sore butt back to camp. Gods, this dream certainly wasn’t turning out like I’d planned. * * *
So, for the second miserable time in my life I was carrying on this conversation with Gabrielle. I didn’t want it to get this far. I thought by this time we’d be making love somewhere. How had it gone so wrong, so fast? When did I lose control of this dreamscape? Just wait till I see Adia…I’ll tell her just where she can stick those herbs of hers. The crazy thing is that I found myself saying the same inane things to Gabrielle as I did the first time. “So, what’s your answer?” I asked. I had to wait until she told me what he said this time around, which wasted a lot of precious time. Gods, what if we woke up before I was able to…well, consummate the whole thing? “No, of course.” Gabrielle answered.
“Why don’t you tell him?” I heard myself asking, feeling déjà vu course through me. “I’m waiting for the right time.” “He’s…” I couldn’t believe I was saying this again. “He’s a good man.” I declared, but my heart wasn’t in it and I think she might have sensed it. “He is.” She agreed. “He’s so sensitive and kind. I’ve never known anyone that I’ve ever felt so comfortable around. Besides you.” She finished and she had a look of expectation on her face that broke my heart. Gods, why didn’t I see that expression the first time? I guess because I was too busy trying to hide my own pain. I looked at her out of the corner of my eye and caught her staring intently at me. We both knew she was waiting for me to say something, if not exactly a declaration of love, to at least ask her not to break up our friendship. I would rather spend eternity in Tartaurus than to say the words I said the first time. This wasn’t exactly the moonlight and orchids I wanted it to be, but time was fleeting and I was working on a deadline here. “Gabrielle…” I paused and realized my mouth had gone dust dry. What if Gabrielle wasn’t as ready to be with me back then as she claimed? Hindsight is one thing, but Gabrielle was still a virgin and the whole prospect of this new kind of loving, with another woman, might be a bit more than she had in mind. “Yes, Xena?” she stopped and looked at me expectantly. “Gabrielle, I…I need to ask you something. I mean, tell you something.” I took a big breath. “Gabrielle, I lo--” “Xena…Xena! It’s Callisto, she’s out!” Joxer’s panicky shouting told me I’d taken too long about this. “Son of a mother fucking Bacchae!” I muttered under my breath.
* * *
You see, this time I knew what the deal was. I sent Perdicus charging in on Argo and I slipped into the small village from the woods. With all the fighting and confusion, Callisto never even saw me until it was too late. She was so fixed on that blonde mare it was almost too easy. There would be no child I had to save or threats about killing my soul. This time Callisto was trussed up and her army either dead or on the run by the time the local militia showed up. It didn’t take too much time, only problem was, the time it did take was valuable. By the time I was through wrestling Callisto to the ground in a surprise attack and finishing off what was left of her men, I saw the fated moment I dreaded. I was too far off to do anything but watch as I fought with Callisto’s lackeys. Perdicus threw his blade to the ground and all I could think was, what an idiot! He left himself and Gabrielle without a sword’s protection while there was still fighting going on around them. “I can’t do this anymore. If you don’t want to come with me, it’s not going to change the way I feel about you. I love you more than anything, but I’m done fighting. I’m going home.” Perdicus said in defeat. “Yeah, but…but…” Gabrielle found herself talking to air until I was able to get there. “Where’s he going?” I had to ask the same stupid question as last time, but I prayed that maybe he hadn’t said what I thought he said. “The answer’s yes, Xena.” Gabrielle looked at me as if waiting for a response. I knew what her next words were going to be, but it still rocked my world, having to listen to them again. “I’m going to marry him.”
Gods, this dream was turning into a nightmare! * * *
It was a small village, but at least it had a decent inn. Once I got Argo stabled I met my wife and the man she was going to marry once again inside the tavern portion of the inn. A few of the local thugs were leaning a little too close to Gabrielle and farm boy was so love-struck that he was oblivious. “Back off.” I hissed from behind the small blonde. The ruffians scurried away when they looked up and caught a glimpse of the expression I was sporting. I was not a happy warrior right about now. I got up before dawn, fell from a tree and almost broke my neck. As a matter of fact, my ass still hurt from landing on the ground like I had no abilities in the trees whatsoever. I had to listen to my wife tell me she was marrying someone else, only to come into the tavern to see Perdicus apparently expecting to share a room with Gabrielle. I don’t think so. “Xena,” Perdicus finally noticed me glaring at him. “We were just getting a room. We can stay the night and be joined by the magistrate in the morning. You’re staying for the ceremony, of course?” Oh, this was too much. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply through my nose to fight down the desire to lift that kid up by his scrawny neck and toss him through the first available door. “Xena, are you alright?” Gabrielle touched my forearm and my eyes opened in a flash. “Gabrielle, I love you.” I blurted out all at once. Gabrielle looked around a little self-consciously. “I love you too, Xena, you
know that.” I shook my head and suddenly there were tears in my eyes. This was a dream, yet it seemed so damned important to get it right this time. Of course, Gabrielle didn’t quite know me as the sensitive type. I think I was scaring the Tartaurus out of her. She probably thought I’d taken a blow to the head in our most recent skirmish. “No, I mean I love you, Gabrielle. I’m in love with you and I want to be with you for the rest of our lives.” She just stared at me, then looked over at Perdicus, around the crowded tavern, then her eyes settled on me again. I thought that this would be the hardest thing in my life to ever do. As a warrior fighting for the greater good, my pride and my honor were all I had that I could call my own. I imagined that this would be the ultimate sacrifice, the most difficult, humiliating thing to ever do, but in reality it was absurdly easy. Now that the moment was upon me, I didn’t even have to think twice. I got down on my knees in that noisy tavern, right in front of Gabrielle. She continued to stare at me, her mouth open slightly. Perdicus seemed stunned and there were a few snickers at what the men there thought I was doing on my knees in front of the small blonde. I placed my hands on her hips and they almost circled her waist she was so slim. I looked up into those emerald eyes that always held love and adoration for me and I spoke my heart. “Gabrielle, I do love you. I’ve felt this way for so long now, but I never had the courage to tell you. I never thought I deserved someone as good as you in my life, and certainly not as my lover. I don’t have one thing to offer you but my love, that, and the promise that I will love you and protect you for as long as I live. There will never be anyone in my heart but you, Gabrielle and I swear that I will spend every day of our lives together proving just that, if you will only choose me. Marry me, Gabrielle.” Gabrielle seemed to be in shock, but no more so than the rest of the inn. “I…I…” she stammered as she looked from Perdicus’ shocked face to my
own. That’s when I felt it. She was torn and she didn’t know what to do. I felt her body pull away from me and I released the hold that I had around her waist. I knelt there for a moment and simply looked into those gorgeous eyes that misted over with tears, confusion and fear apparent in that gaze. I thought that all I would have to do would be to tell Gabrielle that I loved her and she would fall into my arms, but that wasn’t the way real life was. This was all just a dream that Gabrielle and I were sharing, but the outcome would have a definite impact on our lives in the waking world. We might shake it off and say that she chose Perdicus because it was just a dream, and we would still love one another and grow old together, but there would always be this, hanging silently between us. I couldn’t force Gabrielle or overwhelm her, or even trick her into choosing me. She had to make that choice on her own and when she took a step further away from me, I knew I had my answer. This dream was not to be. I rose and made arrangements for a room, gathering my things in my hand, I turned back to Gabrielle. “If you care at all…if you want to be with me. All you have to do is come to the room.” I said. I leaned down and kissed her on the lips. It was soft and gentle and she didn’t pull away. I almost lost it when she pressed her lips to mine for more contact. When I stepped away, she had the most heartbroken look on her face, but I had to make my bard choose. I had to know what the truth was. I turned and walked up the stairs to my room and once the door closed behind me, my tears fell in earnest. * * *
It was late into the night by the position of the full moon sinking into the
night sky. This was a silly dream and yet I sat there on the bed in nothing but my shift and cried. I knew I was letting this affect me far more than I intended, but the thought of Gabrielle in a room with Perdicus right now, stole my strength from me. I sat there and continued to cry like a baby. The knock at the door stopped me momentarily and I knew that whoever was there was sure to have heard my sobs already. So, when I threw open the door I didn’t even bother to hide the fact. Gabrielle stood there, in her bare feet, looking rather timid and more nervous than she usually did around me. “Can I come in?” I opened the door wider in silent invitation. “Xena, I wanted to explain--” “Gabrielle, it’s alright. You don’t owe me an explanation.” She wanted to explain why she was choosing Perdicus over me? I didn’t think I was up for this. I sat down on the bed and realized she was looking into a very tear-stained face. “Really,” I tried to smile and think I succeeded. “I understand.” I finished and used my hands to wipe most of the wetness from my cheeks. “Oh…you do? Then maybe you’ll explain it to me.” She answered. “Huh?” I looked up in confusion. “Well, I mean, my best friend, who practically ignores me half the time and appears to tolerate me the rest of the time, waits until I’m betrothed to someone else and not only reveals all these hidden feelings of love, but she does it in the middle of a busy tavern, while drawing every eye in the place to the fact that she’s on her knees. What was I supposed to say to that, Xena?” “I…I…” I lowered my head because I couldn’t meet her inquiring stare.
“I didn’t want it to be like that. I wanted it to be beautiful and romantic, but when I saw you two in the tavern…I assumed that Perdicus wanted to spend the night with you--” “And you thought I would? I thought you knew me better than that.” Gabrielle walked across the room and I watched as she poured some water from a pitcher into a bowl, and then wet a hand cloth. Gabrielle returned and stood in front of me and I never protested as she wiped the cool cloth across my face, wiping the tears away. “Did you mean it…what you said downstairs?” she asked in a very soft voice. “Every word. I know I don’t use them as well as you, but everything I told you was the truth. I do love you, Gabrielle.” I answered. “How do you know who you’re really in love with, Xena? Can you tell when they kiss you?” she asked absently, allowing her own fingertips to rest on her lips. “That’s part of it,” I replied. “When I kissed you downstairs I never wanted it to end. I felt it in more than just my body. I felt it in my soul, Gabrielle.” Her eyes rose up quickly to search mine and she looked alarmed. She walked away and stood in front of the open window, the warm breeze blowing wisps of golden hair away from her face. “I kissed Perdicus tonight,” she stated simply. Gods…I really did not want to hear about what they did in their room. Gabrielle was here to tell me she finally decided that she loved me, that she already slept with Perdicus, and we would all live happily ever after, but I would end up getting seconds again. It was already too late. “It didn’t feel the same as when you kissed me,” she answered quietly.
It took a few heartbeats, but I finally understood without the whole stone wall falling in on me. I wanted to smile like an idiot. I wanted to climb to the top of the roof and scream. Instead, I rose and walked over to where Gabrielle stood, looking out the window. “How did you feel when I kissed you, Gabrielle?” I asked, leaning into her, but not touching. She turned and looked up at me and I knew that whatever she asked me for at this moment, I would agree to. “Would you kiss me again, so I can be sure?” I smiled a very small smile. “Absolutely,” I answered. When I leaned in for that kiss, I felt my destiny click into place. The kiss was soft and passionate, tender and hungry all at once. By the time I parted my lips to let my bard’s inquisitive tongue enter my mouth, she had her arms around my neck and I was pulling her body tightly against my own. I moaned at the warm softness as her tongue caressed my own and I regretfully had to eventually come up for air. “Gods, Gabrielle…where did you learn to kiss like that?” I asked, breathlessly. She gently touched her hand to my cheek and I could see she was trying hard to control her own breathing. “I asked Perdicus to stop because when he kissed me, it didn’t feel anything at all like this. When I kiss you, Xena, I feel it all the way down into my soul. It feels right.” Gabrielle said. “So, you and he didn’t?” I couldn’t bring myself to say it, but I needed this confirmation. She shook her head back and forth and I felt like my heart was going to pound right out of my chest.
“I told him that I would always love him as a dear friend, but it wouldn’t be fair for me to marry him when I was in love with someone else.” I reached down and lifted her chin until her eyes met mine. “I love you, Gabrielle.” “I love you, too. For a long time now.” she added. “Gabrielle, why didn’t you ever say anything?” I chided. “Because I didn’t think I could ever be loved that way, especially not by you. I didn’t think…I didn’t think you would ever want a tag along farm-girl as your lover.” “Oh sweetheart, you are so much more than that. You are everything to me, my heart. You are my world.” I said and now she was crying too. I took her face in my hands and kissed her again, slower this time, taking my time to explore every subtle nuance of her mouth. “Gabrielle, I want to make love to you. If you think it’s too fast, we can wait, but I--” “I don’t want to wait, Xena. I want it more than anything. But…” “But what?” I looked up in a hurry. “I don’t know what to…I mean, I’ve never…” she stammered a bit, but I already knew what she was trying to say. “Then let me make love to you.” I answered knowingly. My sweet bard smiled up at me and I thought that no Queen on earth could possibly tempt me while I had this treasure. I took her by the hand and led her to the bed. I sat down and pulled her closer until she was standing between my legs. I wanted to do this right and I had quite a few seasons of fantasizing exactly how I wanted our first time to be. When I raised my hands to begin untying the laces that held her small top together, I noticed
that I was trembling. As I pushed the top from her small, muscular shoulders, I think I must have groaned aloud. “Xena, are you okay?” Gabrielle asked. I realized what I’d done and grinned in embarrassment. “If you mean am I aware that I must be in Ellysia, then yes, I’m okay.” Gabrielle smiled shyly and helped me as I removed her belt and skirt. “Gods, Gabrielle, you are so beautiful.” I murmured, pressing my lips against the silken skin of her stomach, which fluttered lightly at my touch. I pulled her to sit down beside me, then to lie back onto the bed. I was about to lie beside her, when my bard stopped me. “Xena…I want to see you too,” she requested. “Oh,” I said, because I couldn’t make my brain come up with anything wittier. I sat up and removed my shift and heard the small gasp that came from Gabrielle’s throat. “You’ve seen me naked before.” I commented, already feeling myself grow wet at her hungry stare. “Not like this,” she answered, rising up and leaning on one hand. I understood what she meant. We bathed together, dressed together, and if we wanted to see more of our partner’s body, we stole casual glimpses out of the corner of our eyes. Starting right now, we would no longer have to sneak an eyeful of the other. Gabrielle knew that starting right this moment, my body belonged to her and she could look as long as she pleased. “May I touch you?” she asked. I swallowed and seemed to have lost the ability for speech. I could only nod
as she reached out her hand and let her fingers slide against my already overheated skin. “Where do you like to be touched, Xena?” she asked me and something in me knew it was a rhetorical question. Gabrielle didn’t seem to expect an answer, which was just as well because I couldn’t verbalize a single word. I watched her eyes as they followed the progress of her hand from my face down along the length of my throat. “Here?” I nodded and felt the pressure of her fingertips as I swallowed. She continued on, down into the hollow of my chest, spreading the palm of her hand over one breast. When she squeezed the flesh just slightly, I groaned and felt my nipple harden and press against her palm. I think she moaned at the sensation, too. “Here?” she asked again, her voice taking on a sensuous throaty quality. When she concentrated her efforts on the hardened nipple I moaned again. “Oh, yes.” I breathed and I closed my eyes, simply in awe at my young bard’s boldness. My eyes flashed open when I felt her fingers move through the dark triangle of curls and graze across my clit. “Gods, Gabrielle!” I exclaimed and grasped her wandering hand in mine. This seduction wasn’t going exactly as planned and if I continued to let my bard have her way; I’d end up being taken, instead of the other way around. Gabrielle smiled as I pushed her back against the bed and stretched my body out alongside of her. I think she already had an inkling of the power she held over me. “Gabrielle…Gods, how I want you.” I whispered, and then kissed her in a way that would show her just how much. I directed my kisses lower, along
her throat and the upper swell of her breasts. “Xena…will it hurt?” she interrupted and I kissed her lips in reassurance. “Some women feel more pain than others. Any hurt that you feel will be swallowed up by the pleasure, I promise you, my heart.” Saying that I let my right hand roam across her body, gently kneading the flesh of her breast, leaning down to place a soft kiss on the pebbled flesh that quickly became erect with desire, finally spreading her thighs apart and running my fingers along the smooth skin on the inside of her thigh. Gabrielle was beginning to understand about the pleasure outweighing the pain and her breathless moans were like music to my ears. I touched her that way for a long time until my lovely bard finally indicated she could stand the evasive caresses no longer. She arched her back and I let her hand draw my head down to her breast. I started out gentle, with a kiss and an occasional flick of my tongue along the soft curves of her flesh, but soon it wasn’t enough for either of us. I covered a very rigid nipple with my mouth and sucked, working the area over with my tongue, and then sucking it into my mouth even harder, before releasing it between my teeth. “Xena…yes,” Gabrielle exclaimed, pressing her body against my own. I continued making love to her breasts, alternating between the two, leaving my lover gasping for breath and anxious for release. Reaching my hand down between her thighs, I let my fingers lightly stroke along the length of her sex, so that she barely knew she was being touched. “Gods…you’re so wet.” I moaned at that first touch. “I—I’ve never been this wet before, Xena, even when I’ve touched myself. Is that alright?” I got an instant visual of Gabrielle pleasuring herself and let of a long sigh at the sensation. “It is very alright, love. It shows me that you’re enjoying my touch.” I
responded. “Oh, I am.” Gabrielle answered enthusiastically and I felt her move her legs wider apart in encouragement. I wasn’t sure how much Gabrielle knew about women pleasuring one another. I tended to keep her rather close to me when we made our occasional visits to the Amazons, for obvious reasons. When I slid my body down to position myself closer to her center, she seemed to know exactly where I was headed and spread her legs open further. I took my time here as well, using my lips and my tongue to blaze a path along the sensitive skin of her inner thighs. Her skin tasted faintly musky and I felt a hitch in my breathing as my tongue ran across the wetness that had made its way onto her leg. It only fed my craving and before long I simply couldn’t hold back any longer. Oh, Xena!” Gabrielle cried out as my tongue slipped through the reddishblonde curls, exploring every crease and fold that was drenched in my bard’s wetness. I was lost in a place of pure delight. The sensation my wife’s taste was causing on my tongue could not be compared to anything in the real world. The more I allowed myself, the more I wanted until I finally wrapped my arms around her smooth thighs and pulled her closer, drinking like a parched woman in the desert at the luscious gift she offered. I pressed my tongue against her opening, testing the tightness by barely slipping my tongue inside. “Gods, Oh Gods!” Gabrielle practically screamed at the sensation and wrapped both her hands in my hair, pulling me tighter against her. I began to ease my tongue in an out of the sensitive entrance, Gabrielle’s hips beginning to move against me, as she continued to hold my hair in both her hands. I heard her uncontrollable breathing and constant moans and felt her muscles begin to twitch in anticipation. I slid my tongue to the top of her cleft, concentrating on the area I knew would bring her the most pleasure. As I did this, I pressed the tip of my index finger just inside her,
the liquid fire flowing from her making the task quite easy. I pressed in, never stopping my tongue’s motion against her, groaning in absolute pleasure at the feel of the warm velvety flesh that surrounded my finger. “Oh, Xena, please. I want to feel you inside of me.” She tried to thrust her hips onto my hand, but I pulled back so as not to cause her pain too soon. I replaced my tongue with my thumb and let it make slow steady circles across that swollen bit of flesh. I moved my finger in and out to a slower rhythm than my bard’s hips dictated, but she would thank me for going slow later. Finally, my young lover reduced her efforts and went along at the pace I set, beginning to groan aloud at the fire she could feel gradually building between her legs. I moved my own body up, lying over her, pressing kisses against her throat, letting my tongue slide along the edge of her ear. I could feel her legs beginning to tremble, my own center quivering in ecstatic empathy. I continued the in and out motion of my index finger, careful not to penetrate to far, my thumb pressing down harder against her sensitive flesh. “I want to be inside of you too, my bard.” I whispered, flicking my tongue against her ear. “Think how good it will feel, Gabrielle.” I breathed against her. “Xena, oh Gods, Xena, yes…yes…” “That’s it, my heart, let go. I can tell you’re right there…that’s it, baby. Come on, sweetheart. Melt for me, Gabrielle…melt for me.” I bit down gently on her neck just as the first scream left her throat. When she convulsed against me a second time, I quickly thrust my index finger deep inside, easily tearing past the fleshy membrane. Before she could think about the pain, I pressed my thumb against her clit, moving it against the tender area, and Gabrielle cried out again in pleasure at her second release. My own climax ripped through me as I felt Gabrielle’s tightness clamp around my finger, her inner muscles clenching and unclenching
involuntarily. My body was trembling nearly as much as Gabrielle’s. I held her close to me with one arm and simply let her feel the fullness of my finger, still deep inside her. When she was silent for a few moments I gently eased my finger from her, causing another small volley of aftershocks. Gabrielle finally focused on my face and I saw the green eyes clear of their sensuous haze. “Oh, Xena…I never knew…I mean, I didn’t think it would be…I just…” she stammered. I chuckled as I caught my own breath and kissed her forehead, partly covered by damp blonde bangs. “Yea, me too, my heart…me too.” I answered. Gabrielle wrapped her arms around me and snuggled herself against me. I held her tight and closed my eyes, sighing deeply. It was a sound of contentment and of dreams fulfilled. And, when I opened my eyes again, I wasn’t lying in a bed in an unknown inn, holding a young lover. I was in my own bed in the Amazon village and in my arms I held the greatest treasure of all, my wife. Gabrielle looked up into my face with a mix of wonder and happiness on her face. “Did…Xena, did that really happen?” she asked hesitantly. “For us it did, my heart. Thanks in part to Adia’s herbs.” “Oh Xe, it was wonderful. Gods, you put yourself through all of that again for me?” her eyes filled with tears of joy. I kissed her and knew that I would go through anything for her. I wanted to tell her so, that I would stand through any trial, suffer any harm or ill. That I would go anywhere, do anything, be anyone, just to be with her. I wanted to
tell her all of this, but as usual, when she looked up at me with those loving emerald eyes, my tongue froze. I settled for the few words that really mattered on a day such as this. “Happy anniversary, Gabrielle.” THE END
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, XENA DISCLAIMER: Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, etc. are ©copyright MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. I don’t
own them, I just play with them for a while and, like the good girl I am, I put them back when I’m done…okay, they get a little worn, but hey…I play hard! Absolutely no Copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fiction. It’s intended as flattery toward the creators and actors of the characters. All other characters that appear are ©copyright
[email protected] This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies may be made for private use only and I’d appreciate if you included all copyright notices and this disclaimer. VIOLENCE WARNING: That isn’t really where this one is going. SEX: Thank you, I accept. Uhm…I mean, it is Xena and Gabrielle, after all. This is my version of a PWP…you
know the kind of story we bards like to write just as an excuse for Xena & Gabrielle to have some great sex! This story shows consensual love/sex between two adult females. Consider yourself warned if you find that kind of thing offensive. UNDERAGE WARNING: Hey, the Supreme Court said in Reno v. American Civil Liberties Union (1997) that
laws against making available, online, certain “indecent” materials for those under 18 was unconstitutional… look it up! Besides, this is perfectly “decent.” I only know how others feel about my stories from feedback. Let me know what you think about it… homophobes need not apply, however. I’m at:
[email protected] First of all, this story is a part of the Queen series and starts about four weeks after “The Queen of My Heart.” To make absolute sense, you will want to read that story along with "Happy Anniversary,Gabrielle" first. This is a little tidbit that celebrates a couple of things. The Summer Solstice is Xena and Gabrielle’s first anniversary and this just happens to be the Bard’s present to her Warrior. Turnabout is fair play, as they say, and Gabrielle has a surprise for Xena. So, we’ve seen what can happen within the dreamscape when two people try to relive an event in the past. Gabrielle is ecstatic about the memory that resides in her brain, that Xena was her first lover, even though the reality of her marriage to Perdicus never changed. So what about Xena’s first time? The young Queen begins to wonder what would have happened that summer that Xena turned sixteen, if the bard had actually met her wife as that young woman.
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, XENA
EVERYTHING WAS PERFECT, absolutely perfect. The evening, the party, my Warrior, and most of all, the gift she gave me. Oh, I know Xena came up with something that was just as much a gift for her as for me, but all that I put her through in that dreamscape, reliving what was a heart breaking time for the both of us. Well, she deserves my love and thanks and, of course, she has both. I couldn’t wait to get back to our hut to give Xena her present. Well, her second present. The first was a new saddle I had made for Argo. A saddle doesn’t sound like much, but my wife started complaining, a while back, about the used leather of her current one. I thought the new one was functional as well as beautiful and Xena did as well. She especially seemed to like the added touch that I had its creator burn into the saddlebags that went along with it. Each bag had the impressions of the jewelry each one of us wore around our neck, branded into the leather. After Xena and I received a toast for our continued happiness together and spoke with our family and close friends, the first person I sought out was Adia. The tall healer stood next to her wife and when I walked up to her, she commented on the size of the grin I had on my face.
“May I assume that is a smile of satisfaction?” she said quietly. “You may assume that. Oh, Adia!” I threw my arms around her and kissed her cheek. “Thank you so much.” When I released her, she had the same look on her face that most people get. Why is it that these warrior-types are so unused to displays of affection? Eventually the shocked look was replaced by a smile and I turned to Sartori. “I hope you don’t mind, Sartori…I just had to.” “Well, if you weren’t my Queen and if I didn’t suspect the reason, you and I would probably have to talk.” The healer said in her usual matter of fact tone. I wondered just what it would take to get this healer, who was not much taller or older than myself, angry. She always had a cool calm exterior, no matter what. “Adia, I have a favor I want to ask of you.” I began. It was like the woman knew what I was going to say. I wonder if she’s an oracle as well as a healer? “Here,” she held out a small pouch and dropped it into my hands with a few simple instructions. “How did you know this was what I was going to ask?” “I figured that it could go one of two ways. Either you would have had a miserable experience and in that case I’d be making plans for an extended visit to the Northern tribes, or you would have the time of your life and want to reciprocate that experience for Xena.” “Wow, she’s good.” I winked at Sartori. “Happy anniversary,” they both said in unison and when I turned back after
having walked away, I watched the tender kiss the two shared. They reminded me of Xena and I in so many ways. Now, three candlemarks and my limit of two mugs of wine later, I nervously fingered the pouch in the pocket of my tunic. I kept thinking about Xena’s gift to me and the thought that lingered was…why couldn’t I do the same thing? Xena admitted that she was sixteen summers old when she lost her innocence, the year before Cortese attacked her village and her own personal nightmare began. So, why couldn’t I get both of us in the dreamscape and go back to Amphipolis the summer that she turned sixteen? I’m a bard and a Queen, surely that can’t be too difficult a chore. I mean, it’s only a dream, right? How hard could it be? I suppose if Xena and I talked a bit longer about all she went through in our most recent dreamscape encounter, I might have thought twice about it. As it was, I thought that if I planned out a careful and loving enough seduction, it would all fall into place. We would both be sixteen, but I would know what I know now... yea that's it. How was I to know that what happens in our dreams cannot always be controlled. * * *
Our lovemaking on this evening was all I could have hoped for. It was tender and passionate, and even though I had developed a small belly, that was growing larger each day, Xena treated me as if I were the only woman in the world that existed. This warrior could exasperate me to no end some days, but I had to admit, she was bearing the brunt of my mood swings and tantrums lately with uncharacteristic grace. I got up from our bed on the pretense of getting something to drink. “Xe, do you want something?”
“Sure, what are you having?” she asked. “Cider.” She wrinkled up her nose and I laughed. “Would you care for some more wine?” She smiled happily and nodded her head. When I saw that she had her hands clasped under her head and her eyes at half-mast, I quickly mixed the powder into the mugs. I lay back on the bed with her and we each took a couple of long swallows from our drinks. Xena’s brow furrowed and I cursed her extraordinary senses. I leaned over and kissed her before she had time to think about it too long, slipping my tongue inside her mouth. I figured with the taste of cider from my mouth, and well, the fact that my tongue was there too, it would take her mind, and her taste buds, off of Adia’s powder. It must have done the trick because soon we drained our mugs, trading kisses the whole while. She yawned and I followed suit. We usually slept with Xena holding me, but I wanted to feel her in my arms tonight and I told her so. She smiled and situated herself against me, snuggling against the warm skin of my neck. I felt her lips kiss the skin there and I shivered at the tender touch. I ran my hands through the long dark hair, letting my nails run along her scalp and I saw goose bumps rise on her arms. I felt, rather than heard, the sound of contentment that rumbled out from her chest, sounding something like a purr. “Thank you, Xe…for making sure that you were my first.” I said softly. “Mmm, that was my pleasure, my heart.” “And what about you and the season you turned sixteen? Would you have rather it had been me back then?” I asked innocently. “That would have been beautiful.” She answered sleepily.
Xena told me about Talon, the young man she lost her virginity to. She didn’t say much, but what else is new, right? She did say that the reason it was Talon was because she thought she loved him, and that they had a future together. She found out later that he won a bet by sleeping with her, the beauty that no one else could capture. I was sure it broke her heart, what sixteen-year-old girl wouldn’t have been crushed? Of course, when she told me, she shrugged it off. I could see the tears in those blue eyes, however, and I knew that if I ever ran into Talon again, he would have one very pissed off Amazon Queen to deal with. I would make him sorry…right before I kicked his ass. “Tell me what you were like when you were sixteen, Xe.” I whispered. She yawned again and I didn’t know which of us fell asleep first, but the next thing I knew…I was walking through the gates of Amphipolis. I tripped a little at the sudden sensation of walking, when moments ago I was lying in bed. The sun was bright and I looked around at a landscape that was very new to me. It struck me then how much of Amphipolis was ravaged and destroyed when Cortese and his army attacked. Now, the hills were so green and I could almost see the top of the falls where Xena said she and Lyceus played. There were farmers working in fields as far as the eye could see, working in the moderate temperatures of early summer. I heard birds singing and as I drew closer to the village gates, I could smell and hear all the sights and sounds of a bustling community. I captured endearing smiles from every old woman who passed me by, and their caring expressions were getting to me a bit. I was so caught up in the sensory overload that was going on around me that I never thought to look at myself. Maybe they’re staring because I’m dressed funny or the way I’m carrying my staff. When I looked down and caught a glimpse of my large belly I was helpless to do more than let out my Warrior’s favorite exclamation. “Son of a mother fucking Bacchae!” I hissed under my breath. I was pregnant!
* * *
Oh this isn’t fair! I’m not supposed to be pregnant…this is my dream. I’m supposed to be a teenager! How in the world is this going to work now? Gods, this could only happen to me. I sunk down on the nearest bench and seriously thought about having a good cry. I know. I’ll just concentrate really hard and I’ll be me…like when I was sixteen. Some time later I opened my eyes again to see nothing had changed. Okay, how about if I just concentrate on waking up. That way I can just start this whole thing over. Again I reopened my eyes and that’s when I was about to give in to the tears.
How in Hades do I get out of this dreamscape? “Wake--Up!” I punctuated each word with a smack to my head. “I say the same thing to myself some days.” The alto voice commented from behind me. I didn’t have to turn to know who the tall shadow looming over me belonged to. It was her. I didn’t need to recognize the scent of jasmine that she put in her bath or the odor of the sandalwood soap she always used. I could smell her; the scent of her very skin, that was so distinctly my Warrior that I would be able to place it anywhere. When I did stand and turn around I was looking up into smiling blue eyes, the color of cornflowers. The only lines on her face were those around her mouth and she displayed why, when she smiled at me. On the day we were married she was the most beautiful woman I had ever known. Today looking into her face twenty years earlier, I thought only one thing. “Breathtaking.” I said slowly and realized as her cheeks flushed pink that I said the words aloud.
“Thank you.” She said, as if it were the first time anyone ever said those words to her. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to embarrass you.” I responded, not really sure what to say. “That’s all right. My name is Xena.” She said as she extended her hand. I grasped the warm hand and I think she felt something too because her brows furrowed together in momentary confusion. “Do I know you?” she asked. How was I supposed to answer that one? As a matter of fact, twenty years
from now you’ll marry me, oh, and by the way, this is your child I’m carrying. Right. She’ll be calling the local healer over and they’ll toss me into the nearest cell. “I don’t believe we’ve met, I’m Gabrielle.” I said, still unwilling to relinquish her hand. “Are you new to the village, Gabrielle?” Xena asked and I couldn’t believe how good my name sounded coming from her. “Actually I just arrived.” “Are you waiting for someone?” she looked around the busy square for other strangers. “No.” “Traveling with someone?” “Nope.” I answered and followed her eyes down to my middle, then back up to mine. “Are you visiting family here in Amphipolis?” she at last tried.
“I’m afraid I don’t know a soul.” I replied with a smile and I could see that she was hesitant to leave me alone here. I never would have thought Xena was like this as a young woman. She was a lot like…well, like me. “Look. My mother runs the local inn. Why don’t you come stay with us for a while, huh? At least come and share a meal with us.” At the thought of Cyrene’s cooking, my stomach rumbled loudly. “I’ll take that to mean yes.” Xena giggled.
My Xena, giggling…who would have thought it? She put an arm around my shoulder and led me through the busy streets to the inn. She said hello to people on the street and they returned the greeting. I don’t think she stopped talking the whole way there and I simply couldn’t believe this was my Xena. Gods, this must be how Xena feels when I start talking. My stomach protested again and Xena looked down at me and laughed. “My little brother has a monster like that too.” She said as she pushed open the doors to the inn and held them open for me. So that’s where she got that. I wonder if Lyceus had the same type of appetite as I do, though. “Wait here, Gabrielle, I’m sure my mother is in the kitchen.” Xena commented and I heard her calling her mother’s name. I could hear their exchange and I wondered if either of them knew that their voices were carrying into this room. Xena, what took you so long, dear?” “Sorry, mom, but I brought somebody home with me…they looked kind of lost.” “Xena! You did not bring one of your strays home again, did you?” Cyrene’s accusation made me smile. I’d never been called a stray before.
“Ssh, mom, she’ll hear you.” Xena growled. “She? Oh no, young lady. The last time it was a girl she had little ones two moons later.” I was about to burst out laughing and I wish I could have seen the look on Xena’s face at her mother’s confusion. “But, she’s already pregnant.” “Oh Xena, I swear if you brought a pup about to have--” “Pup? Mom, it’s a girl…a real girl. Her name is Gabrielle.” There was silence and I could only imagine the looks those two women I loved were giving each other. The doors that separated the tavern portion of the inn and the kitchen swung open and Cyrene came through, followed by my Warrior. I had my hand over my mouth to hide the smile and my eyes widened in surprise. Cyrene was truly beautiful and it was evident at this age where Xena obtained her natural beauty. “I’m sorry, dear, my daughter and I seemed to have a bit of confusion over your identity.” Cyrene wiped her hands on an apron tied around her waist and held out one hand to me. “She thought you were a dog.” Xena added with a smirk and I laughed. Gods, she was just so damned cute. “Xena, hush.” Cyrene chided in embarrassment. I shook Cyrene’s hand and she smiled warmly, briefly touching my stomach, as everyone did. “Mother! I bet she hates when people do that.” Xena remarked. She knew me better than she realized. “It’s alright, I’m used to it.” I grinned.
“Well, dear, do you need a place to stay? Xena tells me you’re lost.” Cyrene asked me. “Well, not lost exactly, but I do need a place to stay. I--” I realized I didn’t have any dinars with me. “I’m a little short on money right now, but I’m a good cook, I could work in the kitchen, or I could tell stories to your customers and give you my tips, I’m a bard.” “You’re a bard?” Xena replied excitedly. “Have you been on adventures… have you been to the Academy in Athens…can you tell us a story?” “Xena!” Cyrene admonished. “Let the girl breathe. Here, Gabrielle, let’s sit here.” She motioned to an empty table. I smiled over at Xena who was giving me a younger version of her ‘I got caught being an idiot’ grin. I placed my hand over hers. “Yes, on all counts, Xena.” She blushed again and mumbled an apology. All I could think of was that I couldn’t wait to get back to my Xena because I was never going to let her forget this. “I’d be happy to have a bard entertain, but you look like you could use something to eat and a place to have a lie down first. Is there no one waiting for you child…no one expecting you?” “Uhm, I was going to visit the Amazons, but no one is waiting for me.” It was the only thing I could think of and I only hoped that there weren’t any Amazons in Amphipolis. I didn’t think I’d be able to explain to Queen Melosa who I was. “I thought your clothes looked like the women from the southern tribes.” Cyrene added and Xena’s eyes went wide. “You’re an Amazon? Really? Is that an Amazon staff…are you good with it… could you give me a few pointers?” Xena rattled off her questions in one breath and I wanted to laugh out loud.
Cyrene simply turned and raised an eyebrow in her daughter’s direction. So, that’s where Xena got that. My young warrior-to-be looked up at her mother and smiled. “I know. Xena, shut up.” Cyrene laughed and reached over and gave her daughter a hug. It felt so good to watch mother and daughter together. My Xena still lived with the knowledge that at one time in her life; her mother pretended she didn’t have a daughter. I sure wished someone here knew me, I thought as the mother and daughter embraced. I was beginning to feel alone all of a sudden and I could feel hot tears beginning to form in my eyes. Cyrene must have seen it too. “Why don’t we get you some hot food and a room to get settled in, before we do anything else, alright? The world always looks better on a full stomach and a little sleep. I know when I was carrying this one; all I wanted was to lie down on a nice soft mattress half the time. I have a large pot of lamb stew all ready and you can eat your fill, how does that sound?” “It sounds wonderful, but you may want to take that offer back, it takes quite a bit to fill me up.” Cyrene laughed and I was sure she thought I was teasing. “Well, we’ll just have to take our chances there won’t we?” Cyrene responded, rising from her seat. “Oh, I’ll get it for you, Gabrielle.” Xena said, jumping up and taking long strides into the kitchen. Cyrene watched her daughter disappear into the kitchen and turned back to face me. “Well, Gabrielle, I think I’m going to like having you here if you can get Xena to serve up food. Between you and me,” she leaned her head closer, lowering her voice. “The girl doesn’t really have any talent in the kitchen, so it’s just as well she enjoys fishing and hunting with her brothers more.”
I laughed and watched as an eager Xena juggled stew, bread, and some fresh fruit on a serving tray. She set the food in front of me and sat back, not knowing what to say next. She did seem rather eager to please me, and considering I was a stranger, maybe that meant she felt a spark of something between us. “Oh, a spoon…and a napkin.” She jumped up again. “Would you like something to drink, Gabrielle?” “Some water will be fine, thanks.” “Nonsense. Xena, bring some fresh milk. You need to be drinking fresh goat’s milk if you want your baby to be healthy.” Cyrene added. I put on a fake smile. Great…goat’s milk. Just what I need to make this dream a complete nightmare! “I think you’ll be a good influence on my daughter, Gabrielle. I’ve never seen her so helpful in the kitchen. She could use a friend like you.” Cyrene patted my hand and rose to help her daughter in the kitchen. I sure bet she wouldn’t feel that way if she knew I was here to take her only daughter’s virginity, a young girl, who in my estimation, just happens to be about eight seasons younger than me. Talk about robbing the cradle. This is just great! How in the world is Xena going to find a woman eight years older than herself, and pregnant to boot, attractive enough to fall in love with?
Gods, am I ever going to wake up? * * *
“What?” I asked as Xena peered under the table at my feet.
“I was looking for the dog that must have followed you in,” she said seriously. “What dog?” I watched as she grinned from ear to ear. Gods, she is so cute when she
does that. “Very funny.” I responded to her tease. “I’m all done.” I said, pushing the third empty bowl away from me. “Are you sure? Because there’s plenty more--” I slapped her in the arm and she laughed along with me. “Would you like to go to your room? I can show you the way.” Xena said. “Sure.” I replied and I followed her down the hall, just past her own bedroom. “I put you in the room next to mine. That way if you ever need anything, all you have to do is shout.” She smiled proudly. Xena opened the shutters and let the warm southern breeze into the room. It smelled lovely and as she stood in front of the window, the sunlight hitting her face, I could only stare. She turned and came and sat on the bed with me, looking like she wanted to ask something serious. When she did, it surprised the Tartaurus out of me. “Gabrielle, You’re older and you’ve traveled around, so I figure you probably know a lot more than me. Most of the girls my age are already married, but I…I don’t know. How do you know when you’re in love? When it’s the right person?” “I found out through a kiss. I never wanted the kiss to end and I felt it all the way down into my soul.” I answered, using my most recent dreamscape encounter with my Warrior as an example.
“Was it your husband?” she asked. Now how do I answer this one? “No…my wife.” I searched her eyes for disappointment, but didn’t see any. “Oh, that’s right,” she grinned in embarrassment. “You’re an Amazon.” “I guess the important thing to remember is that if you have any doubt in your mind…then it’s probably not the right person.” I added, just in case I should miss the infamous Talon. “Why isn’t your wife here with you?” Xena asked, realizing her mistake. “I’m sorry, that’s none of my business.” “It’s alright.” I answered wondering what I was going to come up with. “She’s no longer here.” Xena looked genuinely distressed and it was easy to see that she took my news as I intended. Making my wife sound dead seemed like the only explanation to give. “That must be so hard for you, to be alone now.” Xena said softly. “You have no idea.” I answered, knowing that right now I would love nothing more than to have my Xena holding me. “You’re still happy about it then…having this baby?” “Yes,” I nodded my head, “very much so.” That’s when it hit me. Why I didn’t remember until now is beyond me. When Xena and I entered the dreamscape for the very first time, Adia said something to us that came to me just now. She explained that if any part of the dream appealed to us, on any level, we wouldn’t be able to change it. That’s why I was pregnant in the dreamscape…I loved carrying Xena’s baby. “Well, I better leave you alone for a while so you can rest.” Xena noticed the
far off look in my face. “I’m glad I met you today, Gabrielle,” she said, standing at the door to leave. “Not near as happy as I am, Xena.” I replied, and she rewarded me with a cute blush in response. I lay down thinking if I could only fall asleep I would be able to wake myself up from this nightmare. I guess it wasn’t too bad. At least I got to meet my Warrior and see what she was like as a young woman, but my whole plan was to make love to her in this dreamscape. How could I do that when I was pregnant, eight seasons older than her, and quickly becoming her best friend?
Please, oh please, let me wake up soon. * * *
The sound of breaking pottery woke me instantly and my first realization was that I was still at the inn, so much for going to sleep in the dreamscape. The next think I knew was that the sound coming from the inn was continuing. One broken plate I could figure, but a lot of them? I grabbed my staff, which was pretty much second nature, and left my room to see about the commotion. When I walked into the main dining area of the inn, two larger boys seemed to be terrorizing one younger fellow, who was sprawled out on the floor. An overturned chair and a few broken crocks were proof as to who was winning. They all turned to look at me as I entered and the blonde haired boy picked himself up off the floor. His sparkling blue eyes and proud chin told me he was Lyceus and I smiled just knowing that now I could always say that I met the young man who was such a special part of my wife’s life. “Who’s this, Lyceus…your new babysitter?” one of the larger boys asked.
“I think if you boys are in the mood to cause trouble, then you should do it somewhere else.” I spoke up. “Yea…who’s gonna make us?” the largest bully questioned me. “I think I can convince you.” I replied. I had about one nerve left in this silly dreamscape and these two were on it. They moved toward me and I could see that Lyceus didn’t know what to think. I held my staff in a defensive posture, but didn’t strike the first blow. They were boys, after all, not the ruffians I was used to dealing with. “And, you think you can, little mommy?” the larger bully asked while elbowing his partner in the ribs. “Why don’t you just be about your business and we’ll forget about the mess you’ve made.” I raised my staff further as they approached closer. I was willing to talk first, but now I could see what Xena always meant when she said that some heads are just harder than others. These boys weren’t about to let it go and I could tell it by the looks in their eyes. The biggest one reached out and grasped my staff as the other made a move toward me. “Hey!” Lyceus jumped to help me, but it was over by the time he crossed the room. I kicked out and stopped the smaller boy with a boot to his midsection, which doubled him over, gasping for breath. At the same time I jerked up on my staff and the end caught the larger boy right under the chin. He let go, but came at me just the same. One-two-three, a move I practiced a thousand times. Two blows to the middle and a sweep behind the knees. A heartbeat later he was lying on his back trying to catch his breath. “Wow.” Lyceus whistled through his teeth. I turned to smile at the boy’s comments, but the instant that I did, bully
number one was on his feet and ready to nail me from behind. I saw the expression on Lyceus’ face, but by the time I swung around, the larger boys fist was coming at me. His wrist was grabbed, inches before his clenched hand was about to meet my face. We all looked over to the person who held the boy’s arm in an iron grip. “I don’t think so, Xena’s low voice uttered. “Don’t you know it’s not nice to hit a woman from behind, Pelas, especially after she just kicked your butt, fair and square? Go on…get out of here before I call the magistrate.” Xena pushed him away from me and I realized that even though she was a wide-eyed innocent at this age, she was still a very strong girl. She looked rather imposing in the first place because she no longer wore a skirt and blouse, but now sported a man’s shirt and trousers. “Come on…let’s get out of this place.” Pelas said to his friend, helping him up from the floor. “It’s not right…girls fighting.” I laughed as the two bullies left the inn and thanked my hero, which caused her to blush slightly. “Sorry, Xe…they hit me when I wasn’t looking.” Lyceus apologized and Xena put an arm around the brother that I knew she loved so well. She mussed his hair and told him they would practice some moves later. “Gabrielle, this is my younger brother, Lyceus. Thanks for helping him out. Those moves are amazing. Do you think you could show me a few later on?” “I’m not sure you need any help, but sure.” I answered Xena’s request. “Nice to meet you, Lyceus.” I said as I extended my hand. He took my hand, but I could see his face was turning scarlet. Boys at the age of thirteen aren’t notorious for their conversational skills so I took no offense when he shook my hand than practically bolted from the room.
“I think he likes you.” Xena said with a wink after her brother dashed from the inn. Great…just what I need. Your brother falls for me! * * *
“I’m going out to bring my brother Toris a meal.” Xena said, carefully placing bundles of wrapped food in a cloth sack. “He farms a small parcel of land just outside of the village. It’s where we grow all the fruits and vegetables for the inn. Would you like to come?” “Yes, I’d love to.” I found myself answering. Feeling pretty good about the time I’d get alone with Xena. That is until I saw our mode of transportation. The tall young woman vaulted herself easily onto the large gray mare, and then offered her hand to me. It was no secret how I felt about horses, but this old girl was even taller than Argo. “You don’t like getting up on horses?” Xena asked. I’m sure she was wondering exactly what kind of Amazon I was. “Oh, it’s not the getting up that bothers me. It’s how far down to the ground once I fall off that worries me.” Xena laughed and continued to hold out her hand. “I won’t let you fall off, silly. Come on, you can sit in front and I’ll hold on to you, okay?” Well, how could I refuse an offer like that? In no time we were riding through the village gates and I didn’t complain one bit when Xena wrapped her arm around my waist for reassurance. We must have made an odd looking pair. A tall girl in her brother’s borrowed clothes and a small, pregnant Amazon. “Put your hands over your ears.” Xena ordered.
“What?” I laughed. “Just do as I say,” she smiled back. Yea, that sounded very much like my Warrior. I held my hands over my ears and it was a good thing too. As we approached the field where a man worked far off in the distance, Xena stood up in the stirrups and yelled. “Ay-yah!” followed by a very familiar, “ayiyiyiyiyi.” So, she’s been doing this before she made it a battle cry. I lowered my hands and watched as a figure that must be Toris waved, jumping on a nearby horse, and riding over. Xena jumped off the horse and helped me down. A few moments later, Toris made his way to the road. “Hey, Sis, what have you got there?” he asked indicating me as he drank deeply from a waterskin. “This is Gabrielle, she’s staying with us. She’s an Amazon.” Xena added and I had a hard time trying to keep from smiling at her youthful exuberance. “Oh, she is, is she?” Toris grinned down at me. “Kind of on the small side to be an Amazon, aren’t ya?” “A scorpion’s rather a small thing, but that doesn’t make its sting any less deadly.” I shot right back. “Oh, is that what that’s for,” he indicated my staff. “Is this what you’re going to use to sting me, little Amazon?” “Toris you’re being rude.” Xena warned her brother. “No I’m not,” he replied as he continued to smile at me. “I just want to see how a real Amazon uses her staff. Come on, little scorpion, try and sting me.”
“Toris.” Xena growled, indicating her patience with her brother was nearing its end. “It’s alright, Xena.” I smiled right back at the tall man who I already thought of as an older brother. “It’s just a friendly little demonstration, right, Toris?” “Oh, right.” He replied and although I dearly loved him I wanted nothing more than to knock that smirk right off his boyish face. “So, come and get me, little scorpion.” He laughed. “I tell you what…why don’t you pretend to attack me.” I responded. Toris thought what most of my opponents thought, that they would use their size and strength to intimidate me. That worked once, but when you spar with the Warrior Princess on a daily basis, you tend to get over that real quick. One of the first things Xena taught me was that a larger opponent was usually slower and could always be beaten with speed. Toris made a quick grab for my staff, but that was such a predictable move…it’s what they all did first. I let him take hold of the top of my staff and swung the bottom portion to crack him on the knee. When he yelped in surprise and let go of the staff, I brought it down to rap sharply on his knuckles. “Ow,” he said, rubbing his hand and backing away. Now I could see that he knew he was going to have to think about this. I knew what his next move would be before he knew it himself. He went for my body, hoping to grab me around the middle, but like all wrestlers, he planted his lead foot out at the same time he lunged. Just as he grabbed for me, I swung my staff around and took out that foot nearly tossing his whole body into the air. He landed on his backside and a cloud of dirt rose at the impact. Xena burst out into laughter and I don’t think I’ve ever heard such a beautiful sound. I looked to her brother and tried to gauge whether he was angry or not. It was hard with men, they hated being bested by anyone, but
a small, pregnant woman was probably lowest on that list. Toris took one look at me, lay back against the ground, and grinned. “Okay, okay…she’s an Amazon.” I knew I loved this man for a reason. Xena and I both helped him up and we kept him company for the next candlemark as he ate his meal. When he was finished he tossed the empty sack back at Xena before draining the last of the skin. “Thanks, Sis. Gabrielle, it was nice meeting you. Don’t go and show this sister of mine any of those moves. She’s already almost as good as I am with a sword, I don’t need her knowing another way to beat me up.” Toris laughed, then turned and rode away. We were almost home when Xena commented on what her brother said. “You don’t think it’s strange, then…me wanting to learn how to use a sword more than wanting to learn to cook?” “I’m an Amazon, Xena. The last thing I think is strange is a woman warrior.” I answered. “Really…is that what you think I am then?” “I guess it’s more important to ask yourself that question. Is that how you see yourself, Xena?” She was silent for a few moments, obviously thinking about that question herself. “I know my mother would love me no matter what I was, and she knows that I just don’t like all those daughter type things. I can sew pretty well, but I’m hopeless in the kitchen, and cleaning…Gods, I’m pathetic. Why is it that all of the things woman are supposed to like, involve staying in the house? I hate being cooped up like that. I like being outside. I like being strong and knowing how to take care of myself.”
She stopped and I turned in the saddle to see her face. She looked like she was about to cry and I wondered why until she spoke again. “Some of the girls my age say that if I act like this, I’ll never find anyone to love me. I guess they’re right. Who would want a warrior for a wife?” she commented sadly. “Someone who loved you for what you are and not what society tells them you should be like. You’ll love yourself a lot more if you just be yourself, Xena. And when you love yourself, it’s hard for others not to.” She smiled and the innocence in that expression, pierced my heart. “You’re so smart, Gabrielle. I bet your wife used to tell you that all the time.” I laughed so hard I almost fell out of the saddle. “Not exactly. Mostly she told me to try and stay out of trouble.” “Were you in trouble a lot?” Xena asked in a confused voice. “Well, let’s just say it has a habit of following me around.” I answered, hoping this dreamscape adventure wouldn’t prove me right on that count. Xena took the opportunity to show me some of the sights around Amphipolis and by the time we got back to the inn it was almost time for the evening meal. I apologized to Cyrene as soon as we entered the establishment for being away so long, but she just smiled and asked me if Xena and I had a good time. “Oh, Xena, dear…you’d better get changed, Talon is here looking for you.” “Did someone mention my name?” a male voice asked from behind us. Now this was just too good to be true, I thought, as I spun around to meet the guy’s butt that was going to get kicked from here to Athens by my boot. When I turned, I had to look quite a ways up to see his face, though. He stood there like a tree, with more muscles than Hercules, and a face like a Greek God. Oh, life just isn’t fair. How in the Known World am I going to get
Xena to give up that for me? I felt like crying.
I’d really like to wake up now, please. * * *
“Xena, what in the world are you doing dressed like that?” Talon asked. It broke my heart, not to mention really pissed me off, at the way Xena turned red and felt she had to explain our whole day to this hunk of rock. “Talon, this is Gabrielle. She’s staying with us.” Xena introduced me and Talon did pretty much what I expected. He mostly ignored me. “Look, Xena,” Talon said turning his back on me to face Xena, effectively telling me my presence wasn’t wanted. “I thought that maybe you’d like to take a ride and watch the sunset with me.” Xena looked over at me and I could see she was torn. I kind of liked that. “I’d love to Talon, but really, it’s Gabrielle’s first day here and I hate to leave her alone. I mean, she is my guest.” Talon turned to look down at me. “Well, your friend could come along, I suppose.” He grudgingly uttered each syllable and I knew having me tag along was the last thing he really wanted. Xena’s eyes lit up and again I felt my heart lurch, seeing my wife fawn over some guy whose brains were in his biceps. It was sweet of her to think of me and suddenly I realized that I was going to make it my mission in life to see that Xena and Talon were never alone. “Gabrielle?” Xena asked if I wanted to go with. “Well, thank you, it sounds lovely, but…well, I was rather thinking of telling some stories this evening to help out your mother.”
“Stories?” Xena’s eyes popped open and I knew I had her. Yep, reel her in. “Oh, Talon, Gabrielle’s been to the Academy in Athens, why don’t we stay here and listen to her tales?” While Xena was looking at Talon, stud-boy was looking at me. I smirked, a really large, self-satisfying kind of smirk. When Talon’s eyes met mine I knew that we both understood one another. Not one other person at the inn knew what was passing between the young man and myself, but we were setting the ground rules to this little game, and we were both aware that the prize would be Xena. “Sure.” Talon agreed, turning to look at Xena, but not before winking in my direction. It felt great doing the bard thing in a crowded tavern again and Cyrene kept thanking me for helping keep the rowdy crowd at bay. I decided to relate some of the adventures Xena and I had, but I changed the names. The stories of a strong female warrior and the bard that became her closest friend turned out to be very popular. Especially to one blue-eyed, ravenhaired beauty that sat right in front, listening intently to every word. Talon sulked most of the evening, but the only thing that really had my attention was the fact that Xena only had eyes for me. I could see that Talon tried over and over again to lure Xena away into the moonlight, but at the end of each tale, I would start one even more exciting and Xena was glued to her chair. I laughed to myself thinking the next time my Xena rolled her eyes at the telling of another story, I would remind her of this memory. I won on this night; Talon never did get Xena to leave the inn. I saw him say goodnight to Xena and she had a look of sadness on her face from whatever he whispered to her, until I called her over and asked her to reach something on a high shelf for me. I was glad that I could cause her to forget stud boy so quickly.
* * *
A week went by and then another and I began to wonder if I would ever wake from this dream. How long could this go on? I enjoyed my time with Xena and her family. It was great fun and I felt Xena and I were growing closer every day. Toris took a special liking to me, but he never treated me like anything other than a sister and it felt nice. Xena and I spent nearly every moment together and so far I’d been pretty successful in keeping she and Talon apart. Xena invited me along every time the young man asked her to go walking and under normal circumstances I would have felt like an unwanted third wheel. This was a special case, however, and I delighted in spoiling Talon’s fun. I began to wonder that if Xena liked this guy so much, why did she ask me to go with all the time? For the first time since this dreamscape encounter began, I felt hope that Xena was beginning to develop feelings for me that went beyond mere friendship. One particular morning I was talking with Cyrene and enjoying a hot mug of tea when Xena came in. I forgot how many days went by since the dreamscape began, but suddenly I wasn’t in such a hurry to end the pleasant experiences with my very youthful Xena. Cyrene got up to start cooking for the lunch crowd that would come through later, just as Xena walked in. She smiled at me and I felt my heart stop for a moment. Sitting down across the table from me, Xena cleared her throat a few times as if she were preparing me for some big news. I felt my knees go a little weak as I wondered if she were about to tell me how she really felt about me. “Gabrielle…I know you’re a lot older, but I wondered…I mean, well the Summer Solstice is almost here and there’s this dance they have in the village square. I was kind of wondering…I know this is a lot to ask, but you’ve become really special to me and I knew you wouldn’t laugh at me.” She paused and cracked her knuckles, folding her hands together on top of the table.
I placed my hands over hers and gave them a squeeze until she looked up and shook away the dark bangs from her face. I smiled to encourage her. “Xena, I think you know how special you are to me too. I’d never laugh at anything you would say. Go ahead, Xe…ask me.” I finished softly. “Well, Gabrielle… would you do me a huge favor and ask Lyceus to go to the dance with you?” It would have been impossible to hide the crestfallen look on my face. Here I thought that the woman I loved was about to tell me that she felt the same way and she only wanted me to go out with her brother. “Gabrielle, it wouldn’t be a real date, he’d only be your escort. Please don’t be mad. I know Lyceus is just a boy, but he has such a crush on you and it would do so much for his self esteem if someone like you would ask him. I’d do it, but I’m going with Talon, and Lyceus would rather die than be seen there with me, anyway.” She spoke rapidly and I knew she misunderstood the look on my face. I felt I was going to cry and there was nothing I could do to stop it. My eyes filled with tears and I let them fall. I was frustrated, heartsick and unhappy and it came out all at once. “Gabrielle, I’m so sorry. Please, don’t cry…please?. Whatever I said I take it back…please, just don’t cry.” Xena looked as if she were going to burst into tears herself. She touched the back of her fingers to my cheek and it caused me to cry that much harder. “It’s alright, Xena. It has nothing to do with you. Pregnant women cry sometimes for no reason at all.” I explained and she looked a little better, but not completely convinced. I wiped the wet tears from my cheeks and smiled for her. “Of course I’ll ask Lyceus to escort me. We’ll have a great time.” “Are you sure? There isn’t anything else bothering you?” she asked.
“Absolutely! There’s nothing else.” I plastered a fake grin on my face, determined to make it easier on my young friend. Xena smiled and quickly leaned over and placed a kiss on my cheek. When she pulled back she had the oddest look on her face and when she stood up, the normally graceful young woman, turned, tripped and ran right into Toris. “Whoa, Sis…where’s the fire?” “Sorry, Tor. I have to go find Lyceus, Gabrielle’s going to go to the Solstice dance with him and I’m going with Talon.” Xena said excitedly. “Talon, eh?” Toris arched an eyebrow; apparently it was a family trait. Toris made it no secret that he didn’t like Talon, but he told me in confidence one day that sisters rarely listen to their brothers about such things. “Oh Toris, don’t act that way.” Xena chided her brother. “Hey, who am I supposed to go with, if the two best looking girls in the village are taken?” He shouted to his sisters fleeing form. I turned around, with my back to the table along the long bench, and felt Toris sit down beside me. I couldn’t stop the tears in front of him anymore than I could halt them for Xena. “I take it this means you don’t like Talon anymore than I do, huh?” he asked. I laughed bitterly and he handed me a clean hankie from his vest pocket. “He’s going to hurt her.” I said at last. “I know. There’s only one thing a guy like Talon wants from a beautiful girl like Xena.” Toris added and I nodded my head in agreement. “I don’t want to see her get hurt like that.” I said. “I agree, but this said, my little Amazon friend, I have to wonder at something.” Toris paused until I looked up at him.
“I don’t want to see Xena lose her innocence to a jerk like Talon, because she’s my sister. What’s your reason?” I turned my head away quickly before Toris could see it in my eyes. Of course, he was never an idiot and he must already suspect or he wouldn’t be asking the question in the first place. I remembered that Toris was one of the first people to ever accept the love that my Xena and I shared. I wondered if he would feel differently now. Oh well, the way I was feeling at this moment, getting thrown out onto the street would just round out my day nicely. “I love her.” I whispered as more tears streaked their way down my cheeks. I felt a strong arm around my shoulder and I leaned into Toris’ brotherly touch. “Yea…that was my first guess.” He said softly. “Oh, it’s stupid. I’m eight season’s older than her; I’m pregnant for Goddess’ sake! She has a boyfriend that’s as big as Mount Olympus, why am I doing this to myself?” I ranted. “Maybe because you already feel what Xena is just too inexperienced or afraid to acknowledge? She’s young and she’s never been away from Amphipolis before. She has no idea how the rest of the world lives. It’s easy to give into peer pressure when this is all you know.” “How come I never knew you were this sensitive?” I teased. Toris grinned. “Because you were too busy kicking my ass.” We both laughed and I hugged him fiercely. “Give her time, Gabrielle. Xena’s a smart girl. Once she puts two and two together, she’ll see who really cares about her.” I nodded my head and reached over to the young man who would always
be like a brother to me. To his surprise and embarrassment I kissed him on the cheek. It was then that Xena walked back into the room and the look she had on her face was one I’d seen a hundred times on my Xena’s face. The expression was pure jealousy and the only problem with this Xena was that she didn’t know what she was feeling or why. She turned and walked away with the same odd look on her face. * * *
“What do you think of this?” Cyrene held a dress up that was a beautiful pale green color with touches of pink here and there. “It’s beautiful.” I answered. “Will you wear it to the dance?” “Me? Gods, no. It’s for you, child.” She responded. “Me? Cyrene I can’t wear that, it’s way too long for one thing and I’m too big around the middle for it.” “Yes, but I’m very good with a needle and thread and I just know we can make it work for you. Let me at least try, Gabrielle.” I smiled and looked at the beautiful dress. It was lovely and I nodded my head, hoping Cyrene was as good a seamstress as she said. Lyceus strutted around for the next two days like he was taking Cleopatra herself to the dance. I couldn’t really understand why a thirteen-year-old boy would even want to escort a pregnant woman to a dance, but for some reason the male population of Amphipolis seemed to hold me in high esteem. Cyrene admonished her youngest son to act like a gentleman at all times and he was taking it quite seriously, going so far as to have Toris teach him how to dance. “Cyrene, it’s so beautiful, you’ve done a marvelous job.” I said turning to
see my reflection in the mirror. The dress was cut to flatter my figure and my belly hardly stuck out at all. It was cut low, but Cyrene just winked at me and said that would keep their eyes from my middle. She made her way back out to the inn and I looked into the mirror one more time at the gown that I thought was much too lovely for me. When I raised my eyes to the mirror once more Xena’s figure was reflected back at me, alongside my own. She had the same odd look on her face as the day she saw me hug Toris and I began to wonder if my young Warrior would ever see what was right in front of her. She simply continued to stare and I began to feel self-conscious. “What…is it terrible? It looks hideous, doesn’t it?” I said, twirling around and looking at the material. “No.” Xena exclaimed, and then a small smile formed on her face. “It looks…you’re beautiful, Gabrielle.” It was my turn to blush and it seemed to please the dark-haired young woman that her words could have that affect on me. “Are you sure it looks okay?” I asked one last time. “Very sure.” Xena replied softly, her eyes never leaving mine. * * *
The party and the dance should have been fun, but all I could think about was the fact that my wife was there with someone else. Not that Xena was ever far away. If the whole situation hadn’t been so heart breaking I could have died laughing at some of the looks my lovely young friend was giving the young men around me, when they asked to share a dance. Of course, I’m sure I had the same pleasant demeanor on my own face when Xena danced with Talon.
She didn’t look as happy as I thought she might and I wondered if Xena was as torn between her feeling for me and Talon as I was between her and Perdicus at one time. I came to the right conclusion, but I was older than Xena is now and I’d known her a lot longer than this sixteen-year-old Xena has known me. I sat at a table and watched as Xena and Talon slow danced together. When they turned, those blues met mine and I smiled at her, or what I thought was a good attempt at a smile. When she returned the smile, it was as if she were in pain, and not the happy young woman I had come to know. Lyceus turned out to be the perfect gentleman. He danced with me and looked more than proud to be my escort. Even he wondered at the silence between Xena and I. “Did you and Xe have a fight or something, Gabrielle?” What could I say? I told him everything was just fine and that girls are complicated sometimes. He nodded his head enthusiastically. Suddenly Toris stood before me and I felt myself being drawn onto the dance area. It was a slow dance and if I closed my eyes I could imagine that Xena’s brother was my own Warrior. “We should have done this earlier in the evening.” Toris said. “Why?” I questioned. “Because, little scorpion, the only way to wake some people up and appreciate what they have, is to take it away from them. Take a look at Xena’s face. I ask you…is that the look of a young woman in love with the man she’s dancing with?” I slowly raised my eyes to see cobalt fire flashing in my direction. Xena seemed more interested in what Toris and I were doing than at what was going on with her own dance partner. That’s when Talon turned Xena and his eyes met mine. That smile said it all. He was telling me that I may have won all the battles, but he won the war. I turned away to face Toris and by
the time I looked up again, Talon and Xena were nowhere to be seen. “Well, that plan worked just great.” I said to Toris and walked from the dance area. * * *
I drummed my fingers nervously against the table. Almost a candlemark went by and Xena never returned. I was halfway between anger and tears and wasn’t sure in which direction I should lean. “Okay, Gabrielle…I think we’re to the point where the games need to stop.” Toris said and I looked up at him in confusion. “Look, Xena is about to make a huge mistake. I know you love her and you want her to come to you, but now is the time to think about what’s more important. Will your silence be worth Xena having her heart broken, or worse?” It only took me two heartbeats to decide. “Where would they have gone?” I stood up from the table. “To the stable behind the inn.” Lyceus leaned over and whispered. Both Toris and I just stared at the boy. “Hey…a guy hears things, ya know?” I smiled and grabbed that young man and pulled him to his feet. “Lyceus, you are wonderful.” I exclaimed and kissed him hard. I ran off to the inn, but not before I heard a number of young men hooting and cheering for Xena’s younger brother.
Xena taught me a few things and although I could never sneak up on my Xena, this one was another story. She and Talon stood in the middle of the barn talking and I couldn’t hear much they were saying to one another. Xena had that same sad and confused look on her face and she was explaining something to Talon. This little chat session of theirs should buy me a few minutes and so I slipped into the inn to retrieve my staff. I wasn’t much competition for Talon, but at least if I had my staff I could get one good whack in, right before he killed me, anyway, and I knew just where I wanted to place that one blow. It was a good thing I didn’t change out of my dress, which crossed my mind. By the time I got back to the barn it sounded like their little discussion was turning ugly. “Look, Talon, I’m just feeling…I’m just a little confused right now. It’s not a good time to make a decision like this.” Xena explained to a very agitated Talon. “Xena, how long do you think I can wait? Do you think I don’t know what this is all about? It’s all about that little Amazon, isn’t it?” The large man seethed. “Gabrielle?” Xena asked, and even now I thought the way she said my name was the sexiest sound in the world. “Don’t play all innocent with me, Xena.” Talon was suddenly beside Xena and had his hands on her in the blink of an eye. “You gave it up for your little Amazon, you can give it up for me.” Even at sixteen my young warrior would never fit into the helpless female category. Just as I was moving toward the couple, not having any idea how I would stop this wall with legs, Xena spurred herself into action. She elbowed Talon in the ribs, hard enough to cause him to release her, and then she caught him again in the chin. Finally she whirled around and slapped him hard across the face. I stopped where I was because they hadn’t seen me yet.
“You shouldn’t have done that, Xena.” Talon hissed, rubbing his jaw and taking a step toward her again. “Well, if she hadn’t, I would have.” I remarked from my spot about ten feet away. “Gabrielle?” Xena sounded frightened and amazed at the same time. I admit I must have made for an odd sight. A small, pregnant woman in a fancy dress, holding her stave and preparing to get her butt kicked by a guy that could pick up mountains and move them by hand. “Well, what do we have here?” Talon grinned, turning in my direction. I had a feeling he was feeling a little sexually frustrated about now and I was certain he was about to direct some of that aggression at me. “Gabrielle, don’t…please, go back inside. I don’t want to see you get hurt.” Xena cried out. “Oh, it’s too late for that.” Talon grinned evilly. Our entire exchange took all of five heartbeats. The large man grabbed for me and I went into attack mode. I fought him off pretty well until my staff got hooked in my dress and it simply spun me around. Talon used one booted foot to kick me in the back and he knocked me to the ground, unable to catch my breath. At the same time I was falling I saw Xena moving toward me. She caught my body before I hit the ground and lowered me the rest of the way. I saw the look in her eye when she reached for my staff and I almost felt sorry for Talon…almost. The tall young woman had a look in her eye that caused the large man to back up a step, but that didn’t stop Xena. She used my staff and put a power behind her blows that I couldn’t come close to. She attacked Talon’s midsection first and when he tried to grab at the stave, Xena spun around and put all her strength into a blow that hit his upper arm. A crack rang
through the air, the kind that sounds just like a bone snapping. Before Talon could finish howling in pain, Xena spun around the other way and used her whole body to bring the staff under and across Talon’s jaw, nearly lifting his whole body into the air before he fell. That second crack was sure to be his jaw breaking I remembered thinking, still trying to catch my breath. Xena stood over the fallen young man, who was whimpering in pain by this time. “Don’t you ever touch her! If you ever lay a hand on her again, I’ll kill you.” Xena hissed. I looked up at her, chest heaving in a combination of exertion and adrenaline, her dark hair in a tangle across her face. If I would have heard her say the word, mine, I would have swore it was my Xena. The sound of her voice, as she threatened Talon, made it quite clear who I belonged to. She backed away from the fallen man and he half crawled, half ran from the barn. Suddenly Xena shook her head as if realizing where she was. “Gabrielle, are you okay?” there were tears in her eyes as she knelt down beside me. “What were you thinking? You could have been killed, the baby--” “I’m okay.” I touched her cheek and she just kept staring at me. She helped me to my feet, but she refused to let go of me and frankly, I wasn’t in a hurry to see that happen either. She held me tighter and I could feel her heart start to beat faster as our bodies connected. I leaned against her as much for support as love. Xena finally pressed her lips to my forehead and I could feel my own heart begin to race. I looked up into her blue eyes and I couldn’t tell what she was thinking. She searched my eyes as if trying to ascertain the answer to some age old question. And, when she leaned down to me, I met her halfway. I felt an
absolute bolt of white-hot desire surge through me, not as much because of the kiss, but at the moan that escaped Xena’s throat as she took my mouth in a kiss that surprised even me. I was lost to a sensation of pure delight as Xena’s tongue demanded entry into my mouth and then moved against mine in a passionate war for dominance. She easily won and I simply floated along on that wave of pleasure. Xena pulled away abruptly, leaving both of us panting and me, certainly wanting for more. She held me at arm’s length and looked in my face, but I didn’t understand what was wrong. She looked terrified and when she finally spoke, I understood her fear. “Gabrielle, I never meant to…I’m so sorry.” “Xena,” I tried to reassure her. “It’s alright.” She kept searching my eyes and if I’d known what she was thinking, I could have easily avoided all the pain the next two candlemarks would bring, but at the time I had no idea what was going through her mind. “Xena?” I asked and reached out to gently touch her cheek. It was obviously the wrong move because she mumbled another apology and bolted from the stable. I called out her name once more and was greeted by nothing but silence. I scared the Tartaurus out of her. All these new feelings and emotions and I take advantage of her. But, Gods, she kissed me like she wanted me. I picked up my staff and looked down at my torn dress. Heading into the house to change I tried to think of the places I could go to search for Xena. I was tired and exasperated and my back was beginning to hurt where I was kicked. I wanted nothing more than for this dreamscape to be over, ending my torture. I finally messed it up entirely. Not only had I just lost any chance at making Xena my lover in this reality, but also, I think I just lost my
best friend. * * *
Two candlemarks of searching and I couldn’t find Xena. I was starting to get really worried, but I didn’t want to concern anyone else in the family, so I simply hoped that she wanted to be off by herself and would come home soon. I looked up and realized that there was one place I hadn’t searched. Xena and I spent a lot of time sitting in the hayloft talking and trading stories, maybe she went up there and fell asleep or something. By the time I reached the top my last hope was dashed. The loft was empty except for sheaves of wheat and hay mounded up at one end. There was a blanket laid out onto the hay that we sat on, but no Xena. I sank down to the blanket and began to cry. I couldn’t seem to stop once I started. “Oh Xena…I messed this whole thing up so badly. I’m so sorry.” I said out loud in between my sobs. “Please, don’t cry, Gabrielle.” I jerked my head up and Xena was peering from behind the wall of hay in the corner. I couldn’t stop crying, though and Xena came toward me and sat beside me on the blanket. “Please, Gabrielle…I can’t stand it when you cry.” Xena moved to wipe the tears away from my face and before we knew it I was in her arms again, only this time she didn’t pull away. “It makes me so sad when you cry.” Xena held me and rocked me in her arms until I had no more tears left. She touched my face and lifted it until our eyes met. “Better?” I nodded and wiped the rest of my face off with the back of my hand. “Xena, why on earth did you run away like that?”
“Because…I--” she ran her hands through her long hair and turned away from me. “Is it because you kissed me?” “I’m sorry, Gabrielle, I should have never…I mean, I know I’m a lot younger than you.” She let the thought trail off. It hit me then what this was all about. Xena was attracted to me, but thought I didn’t want her. Oh Gods…this just gets better and better. “Xena,” I began, hoping I was doing the right thing. “Did you ever stop to think that I might have enjoyed that kiss too?” “Gabrielle, you don’t have to say that just to make me feel better.” Xena responded. “Gods woman, you can be so thick sometimes.” I said in exasperation, then I grabbed Xena’s chin and turned her to face me. I leaned closer and kissed her hard. I pulled back enough for her to catch her breath and then I kissed her again, pushing her back onto the blanket with no intention of stopping until I made a believer out of her. I think my message finally got through when I felt strong arms pulling me against her body and small whimpers escaping in between the kisses. I pulled back and leaned up on one elbow, smiling smugly. “So, do those feel like the kisses of a woman who doesn’t feel the same as you do?” I asked. She gave me a typically Xena grin. “I don’t know…maybe we should try again just to be sure.” I laughed and reached down, but this time I gently brushed my lips against hers. “I love you, Xena.” I whispered. “Oh Gods, Gabrielle, I love you too. I just thought that…I mean, why didn’t you say something sooner.”
“Oh, right!” I leaned up again and grinned. “Your boyfriend was tall, dark, and muscle-bound! I’m eight seasons older than you, and a woman who’s carrying a child. How could I ever hope to compete?” Xena reached up, that lovely, beautiful smile still on her face. “There was never any competition. You had my heart from the very first day.” She said as she traced the contours of my face with her fingertips. “Gabrielle, would you stay with me… marry me? I feel like I can do anything when you’re beside me. I could work at the inn or I could help Toris with the land, I could help to raise the baby.” “Would you want to do that, Xena? You’re a young woman and you may want to go on some of those adventures.” I asked her. “Adventures wouldn’t be any fun without you. I love you so much, Gabrielle, and I want to be a part of your life, if you’ll let me.” She answered. “Yes, my love, I always want to be with you. Right now or in twenty seasons, in this reality or in any other. I always want to be with you, Xe.” We kissed…we kissed for a very long time. Eventually, those intimate touches took on a fire all their own and an inexperienced sixteen year old was soon growling in frustration. Xena’s touches grew bolder and I did nothing to discourage her caresses, but I could see she wanted more and didn’t exactly know how to go about it. Now, my Warrior’s libido is the stuff legends are made of, but at sixteen…I wondered if I should be scared? I allowed my hands to roam and when I cupped Xena’s breast through the fabric of her dress, and let my thumb brush back and forth across her nipple, she groaned as if she were in pain. “Gods, Gabrielle! That feels so…” I pinched the hardened nipple lightly through the coarse fabric. “Gods, so…so good!” she finished at last.
I pulled back slightly so at least one of us could be strong. Xena pulled me back against her and nuzzled my neck, kissing the taut skin there. “Gabrielle…please don’t stop.” Xena pleaded. “Xena, maybe we need to think about this.” I tried to focus, but it was extremely difficult to do considering Xena was now sucking on my neck and I always let her have her way when she starts to do that. “I’m tired of thinking about this, Gabrielle. I don’t want to think, I want to feel. I want it to be you,” she whispered. “I want the first one to be you.” She gently pushed me away and sat up on her knees. She unlaced the front of her dress and pushed it off her shoulders. When it came to rest at her waist I was a goner. “Hades teeth!” I exclaimed as I felt every last bit of self-control flying away. Xena continued and pushed the dress down, removing her breeches at the same time. She knelt there wearing nothing but a smile and she watched as I reacted to the sight. “By the Gods, woman…you are beautiful.” I stammered. Xena reached for the catches to my tunic and I covered her hands in my own. “Xena, I’m pregnant.” I said, realizing it sounded pretty stupid, but I was suddenly feeling very self-conscious. She smiled and I had to wonder where she got this burst of confidence all of a sudden. “I know,” she whispered in return and proceeded to undress me. Once we were lying next to one another, she covered my belly with the palm of her hand and explored the curves there. “Gabrielle, I can’t even believe that a woman as beautiful as you would want to be with me.” “Don’t you have any idea, my love how beautiful you are?” I said and her
skin flushed a deep pink. “It’s true, Xena. You are so beautiful,” I continued as I let my hand explore her body. “I want to make love to you, I want to be the first person to ever touch you this way, I want mine to be the name that you cry out when you come for me. Is that what you want, Xena?” “Oh Gods, yes.” She replied. With that answer I couldn’t hold back any longer. I began to make love to this woman for the first time of what would be thousands of times over many seasons. And of those times, we would both remember this one as the beginning of our lives together. My hands moved over her skin as my mouth pressed against her lips. She slipped her tongue past my lips and I began to suck on the strong muscle. I could feel the pull of her flesh as I sucked on her tongue, and I matched it to the rhythm in which she rolled her hips against my thigh, pressed firmly between her legs. She spread her legs wider and I could feel her wetness as she rubbed her clit harder against the muscles in my leg. I knew, as I moved myself lower along her body, that I would be spending a great deal of time with her breasts. The first touch was exquisite; the first taste was enough to send both of us out of our minds with lust. “Gabrielle…please…don’t stop. Don’t ever stop.” Xena incoherently moaned as I used my lips, tongue, and teeth to bring her higher and higher. I alternated between each breast and while I had my mouth on one, I used my hand on the other. Xena’s body was constantly trembling now and she called out to me as I slid lower. “It’s alright, love. If I do anything that you don’t like or feel comfortable with, all you have to do is say so and I’ll stop. Okay?” I asked. Xena nodded her head and lay back against the blanket. Once every inch of her skin felt the touch of my lips, I settled myself between her legs and pressed my palms against the inside of her thighs. Instantly, her legs
parted and the sweet, musky scent of her made me lightheaded. “Oh, Xena.” I breathed, kissing the soft skin of her inner thigh until I reached those dark curls. She was so wet and I told her so and how happy that made me. I pressed my tongue against that sweet, flesh and almost climaxed right then and there from the mere taste of her. Xena groaned sharply and lifted her hips so as to not lose the contact of my tongue. My excitement increased as I thought about the fact that I was the first person to ever touch her in this way, in this spot. I moved my tongue slowly, but relentlessly. Sometimes teasing the folds with my tongue, other times using the muscle to press against that tight opening, causing another groan to rumble from Xena’s chest. She began to rotate her hips in a counter rhythm against the strokes of my tongue, lifting up and pressing her clit as hard as she could against me, over and over again, until I slowly began to pick up speed. She tried to hold back the sounds she was making, but in the nearly empty barn, set far in back of the inn, I knew no one would hear us. I eased one finger inside her, never slowing the movement of my tongue. The slight penetration was enough sensation for her to crave more. I felt long fingers on my shoulders, then grasping my hair, forcing my tongue against her harder. “Gabrielle…Oh, Gabrielle, yes…please…” Xena moaned. In one even movement I slid inside of her. Her hips froze, and she gasped at the penetration combined with the act of me wrapping my mouth around that sensitive area of nerves and sucking it in gently. Her hips resumed their motion, now with an intensity that didn’t surprise me. I slid my finger almost all the way from her and plunged it in again. I repeated the action again and again as I sucked harder on the bit of flesh between my lips. Finally, I felt the muscles in her body shiver all at once and her legs parted as wide as she could make them. I sucked harder and flicked my tongue
across that tiny area that would bring her such pleasure. Xena’s back arched and I could hear her take in a deep breath, then one shout of pleasure escaped her lips. “Oh, Gabrielle!” With that her body climaxed and I opened my eyes in time to see the wonder and rapture her face held at that moment of intense pleasure. I wasn’t disappointed. Xena had never been more beautiful and as her body shook against me, I felt the warm rush of wetness on my tongue that flowed from her sex. After a few moments I slid my finger from that satiny warmth and felt her tremble as aftershocks of desire enveloped her. I resumed my tongue’s action and continued to lap gently at the tender flesh. I licked at the sweet juices that flowed from her, taking care to steer clear of the too sensitive flesh at the top of her cleft. It was gentle and relaxed and I simply couldn’t stop tasting of her. Once again, I felt the movement begin in Xena’s hips as she gently rolled them in a rhythm against my tongue’s strokes against her. “Oh, yes.” She soon murmured and I decided to feast again on that more than willing flesh. I wrapped my strong arms around those luscious thighs and drank deeply of the ambrosia found within those folds. I pressed into her and let my tongue replace the action my finger had just finished with. In and out, I penetrated her and I could feel her impale herself on my tongue a little more with every thrust of her hips. She did more of the work herself this time, dictating how hard and deep, but it didn’t take long until she cried out and that wet flesh quivered under my tongue as she felt a second release engulf her. Her body was still trembling when I came up beside her and wrapped my arms around her. I rocked her and whispered my love to her as she cried. I understood her tears and her inability to put voice to why exactly they were there, but as I would tell my wife on the day we were married, sometimes you’re just so happy, you have to cry.
I closed my eyes and felt the warmth that lay in my arms and when I heard that voice, we both cried. “I love you, my heart.” Xena’s low alto intonation had become deeper as she grew older. I opened my eyes to look into the warm blue color that I loved so well. This was my wife, the warrior who gave me the child I now carried. The lines along her forehead and around her eyes showed my Warrior’s true age, but in my mind, she would always be the sixteen-year-old girl I fell in love with in Amphipolis. “Happy Anniversary, Xena.” I whispered. THE END
TO WALK THE PATH OF A QUEEN DISCLAIMER: Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, etc. are ©copyright MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. I don't own them, I just play with them for a while and, like the good girl I am, I put them back when I'm done…okay, they get a little worn, but hey…I play hard! Absolutely no Copyright infringement is intended in the writing of this fiction. All other characters that appear are ©copyright to the author,
[email protected]. This story may not be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies may be made for private use only and I'd appreciate if you included all copyright notices and this disclaimer.
VIOLENCE WARNING: There is some violence (come on it's the Warrior Princess). There is also a dream sequence that depicts violence against a baby (it's not too terrible…just wanted folks to know).
TIMELINE: My own making. Instead of Xenaverse... it's Gabrielleverse! Let's just say that India never happened, Eli never sucked the bard into buying what he was selling, Gabrielle never became a wimp and tossed her staff away, Ephiny never died, and our ladies were never crucified. I think I blocked out all the episodes of XWP I didn't care for midway of season four! This is mostly how I wanted the series to go.
HIGH ANGST WARNING: I was threatened within an inch of my life if I didn't start putting this disclaimer on some (all?) of my work. I will henceforth rate the angst content with sad faces, one being the lowest and four being the highest. That being said…this story earns: 6 sad …yep, "off the scale sad." I do, however, always believe in happy endings!)
SEX: Yes, I'll have some, thank you. I mean, yes there is. It is our favorite two Soulmates, after all. It's not gratuitous, but it is quite explicit when it gets going. This story shows consensual love/sex & even occasional light bondage between two adult females. Even when they get carried away, it's all done in love.
UNDERAGE WARNING: Hey, the Supreme Court said in Reno v. American Civil Liberties Union (1997) that laws against making available, online, certain "indecent" materials for those under 18 was unconstitutional…look it up! Besides, this is perfectly "decent."
SPECIAL THANKS: Goes to the Ex-Guard (Now The Bards' Village) mail list for all their valuable feedback. To KT, for her poem, Looking Back At You. I only know how others feel about my stories from feedback. Let me know what you think... I'm at:
[email protected] *This is the fifth story in the "Queen" series. You may be more than a tad lost if you don't read them in sequence. The series begins with "To Become A Queen" and follows with "Quest for A Queen," "The Heart of a Queen," and is followed by "The Queen of My Heart."
AUTHOR'S FOREWORD
This is not a light hearted tale. The first part is sad, plain and simple. I can only describe it by saying that we all have trials and tribulations in our lives. It is not whether we come through them or not, which makes us great individuals. It is the journey through the pain, the path we take, that shows what kind of people we are inside. I've written this one to reflect those thoughts. It's Gabrielle's journey. You will like the end, however.
TO WALK THE PATH OF A QUEEN
CHAPTER 1
"THWACK!" "Thwack!" Gabrielle listened to the sound the long handled axe made as it bit deeply into the wood. A Queen's paperwork forgotten, she cupped her chin in her hand and watched in equal parts fascination and desire, at the strength in her warrior's frame. A heavy sigh escaped her, remembering the sharp words she'd thrown at Xena just before the dark-haired woman left the hut. Her wife bore the stinging words with the good grace that was fast
becoming the warrior's trademark during Gabrielle's last few moons of pregnancy. Xena would nod her head, calmly accepting blame for whatever indiscretion her wife thought the tall woman guilty of, and then be there a candlemark or so later, to hold Gabrielle in her strong arms, as the Queen apologized and wept over her unmanageable mood swings. The hard sound of the axe disappeared, the sound of a pounding hammer taking its place. Xena was laboring hard to complete the final work on the addition to their home. The extra room would come in handy with the baby arriving, and all too soon, Gabrielle thought to herself, it would become the child's bedroom. The warrior wore a shirt with the sleeves ripped off and a pair of leather trousers while she worked with the wood. The clothing felt a bit stifling to the woman who was accustomed to much less attire, but it protected her skin more. Xena finally gave in and switched from her leather battle skirt to the leather trousers when she got tired of picking splinters out of skin. The weather was hot, as it had been most of the summer. Even now, as they entered the harvest season, the sun continued to burn down. Rain was scarce this summer and the meager harvest showed it. All across the Amazon lands, dried creeks and ponds turned into nothing more than cracked, parched landscapes. Gabrielle continued to stare at Xena, a myriad of fantasies playing themselves out before her mind's eye. She sat there with a little half smile on her face and a dreamy expression in her eyes. The young Queen knew she was a basket case full of conflicting emotions lately. Each fortnight that passed her libido traveled further and further away. She adored making love to Xena and found it intensely satisfying, but she couldn't even explain to her partner why she had no interest in Xena pleasuring her. How could she explain something she had no answers for herself. It brought her to tears on more than one occasion, Xena's patient love, and understanding coming into play to calm the overwrought Queen. Xena would eventually reward her with a tiny, all-knowing grin, and tell her it was normal and Gods help them when the young woman was ready.
Gabrielle felt as if that time had finally come. She felt for her wife, watching the warrior work so hard. There would be days when intimacy, even at the talented hands of her wife, was the last thing Gabrielle had on her mind. She still worried, even after Xena's reassurances, that she would never feel that spark of passion drive through her like a lightning bolt scorching the earth; that she would never again feel desire possess her body so completely that only a certain dark-haired Warrior Princess could release her from its spell. She gazed out the window just as Xena paused to take a drink of water from a skin, conveniently hanging on a nearby tree branch. She watched as the tall warrior tilted her head back, drinking deeply. Gabrielle realized her mouth was hanging open, her breathing coming in small, shallow pants. Tiny rivulets of water escaped past the seal of the waterskin where it met Xena's lips. The thin streams trickled down her chin, falling onto her chest, soaking the shirt, and causing the fabric to cling to the well-developed chest. Gabrielle swallowed hard and felt a warmth flush her skin, a feeling she hadn't felt in moons. Amazing! Of all times to be ready. I'm nearly ready to
give birth and I want hot and heavy sex! Get a grip, woman! The young Queen gazed down at her swollen belly, looking quite large on her small frame. "Oh, yea…that's attractive." Gabrielle grumbled aloud to no one but herself. Her eyes were drawn once again to the warrior outside. She felt her heart do that little stutter that it always did when she thought about her love for Xena. Gods! That does feel good, though. It's been so long since I've
wanted Xena to touch me. Xena paused to wipe the sweat from her eyes. She tried to get the majority of the heavy work done in the early morning and evening hours, taking a much deserved rest during the heat of the afternoon. She reached for a waterskin and drank deeply, feeling the unnerving sensation of being watched. When she raised her eyes and scanned the area, she
immediately locked on to her wife's penetrating gaze. Her eyes met Gabrielle's and the waterskin very nearly fell from her grasp. Her need clawed at her belly as if it were a living entity. Not the need for pleasure, Gods, Gabrielle had been more than generous with her affections, well, the last two weeks had been pretty dicey, but it could have been worse. Xena hadn't made love to her wife in moons. She couldn't really blame the young Queen, though. Xena remembered when she was carrying Solon. She had an insatiable need to satisfy Borias, her lover at the time and Solon's father, yet her own body was off limits. She didn't know why, but she assumed it had something to do with the way she felt in her body at the time. She definitely remembered that it was no fun having that huge belly going ahead of her at all times. Frankly, she felt like a pregnant mare. Because of this, she neither complained nor fussed about her wife's decreasing libido. She accepted what Gabrielle was able to give and took pleasure in the fact that Gabrielle did appear to be deriving a certain amount of gratification from satisfying her warrior. Xena was content that the young Queen would give her some sort of a signal when she was ready. Xena recognized that her wife was sending her a signal so large it might as well have been a bonfire. The look in Gabrielle's eye was unmistakable, and pregnant or not, Xena still thought she was the most beautiful creature in the Known World. She had to admit, going the last fortnight without Gabrielle even touching her made her more than willing for anything the young woman might have in mind. She was rather hoping Gabrielle would have had the baby by the time her dry spell snapped, but she was the Warrior Princess, after all. She was willing to improvise. She was getting laid this afternoon and the look in her wife's eye, told her the pleasure would be reciprocated. "It's getting hot out here, warrior." Xena caught herself staring off into space. She quickly looked down with a sheepish grin at the small blonde standing beside her. Gabrielle's emerald
eyes sparkled with undisguised lust and the warrior was struck speechless. You have no idea how hot, my heart! "Thinking about taking a break for a while?" Gabrielle asked. "As a matter of fact, I was thinking of heading of to the baths right now." "Sound like a good idea," the Queen replied quickly. Xena heard the tenor in Gabrielle's voice. The sound was a combination command and desperation. The notion, in itself, that Gabrielle wanted Xena, made her wet. She could feel her arousal washing over her like a penetrating warmth. "Be right back, love," the warrior bent down to steal a quick kiss. Xena practically ran to the hut for a clean shift and took off in the direction of the baths. Gabrielle chuckled to herself, thinking once again of the small surprise she had fashioned for her warrior. A worried frown creased her brow, wondering if Xena would have a problem with something like this. No, it's not like we've never used anything like this before, she shook off the nagging worry. She owed her wife a good time after what she'd been putting her through lately, and this would be the perfect way to satisfy Xena for a good long time. * * *
"Mmmm…feels so good. Brie, if you keep that up…" Xena yawned, "I'm going to fall asleep." "It's okay to fall asleep, love," the Queen responded. Gabrielle's hands gently massaged the scented oil into the muscles across the warrior's broad back. She used a light and loving touch, meant to relax
and not arouse. "But, I don't want to fall asleep during this…" Xena answered sleepily. "It's not that kind of massage, Xe. Just relax," Gabrielle whispered close to the warrior's ear and smiled at the goose bumps that rose up on Xena's skin. "I want you to take a good long nap because you're going to need all your strength when you wake up." If Xena heard that last statement, she never gave any indication as the light sound of the warrior's snores filled the room. * * *
Xena felt she was floating on a cloud. The hands that cupped her breasts…she would know the feel of those hands anywhere. The fingers moved to run in teasing strokes up and down her body as she lay on her back across their large pallet. Nails lightly raked up the inside of her thighs and she felt a delicious trickle of wetness between her legs. Still halfway between sleep and the waking world, Xena sighed as she felt soft lips kiss across her chest. "Oh Gods, Brie…yes!" She exclaimed when she felt a warm wet mouth enclose an aching nipple in its grasp. Xena opened her eyes to a beautiful site. Gabrielle's golden hair fell across her chest as her wife teased and suckled her breasts. The young Queen bit down gently on the tender flesh in her mouth and Xena arched her body into the sensation. Her forward progress was halted immediately and Xena's eyes flew open wide. She tugged experimentally to discover she was bound to the bed by thick leather straps at her wrists.
"What in--" "Sshh, love…relax…" Gabrielle said softly, bending once more to administer her loving touch upon the warrior's body. "Brie!" Xena's voice sounded panicky to her own ears. Gabrielle raised her head in concern. She stroked Xena's smooth cheek, attempting to gentle her. "Xe…it's all right. It was my doing. Relax and let me love you." Xena tried. She took deep breaths of air, attempting to concentrate on her wife's touch. Her heart was racing along and she couldn't seem to slow its pace. She realized she wasn't getting enough air. Gabrielle moved up to look into her lover's face. The sound of Xena's breathing grew loud, exhaling in short bursts. It resounded throughout the room and Gabrielle thought her wife was very close to having an anxiety attack. She'd never seen the warrior in this state and it frightened her. "Xe…it's okay, love, we've done this before." I--I can't…" Xena tugged hard on the leather straps, and feeling no give to them at all, she panicked all that much more. "Let me loose, Gabrielle." Gabrielle had no idea what was happening, but she immediately tried to respond to her warrior's request, which soon became a demand. "Now! Gabrielle, please…get these off!" Xena was pulling with all her strength by this time and even the headboard of the large wooden bed creaked and groaned under the stress, but the thick leather held. Gabrielle was trying to loosen the straps, but by now, Xena's constant tugging had tightened them considerably. Her wife's eyes were wide in what Gabrielle could only determine was fear. The warrior's chest rose and fell deeply, but she couldn't seem to take in enough air.
"Gabrielle!" Xena's panicked plea cut through Gabrielle's confusion at this turn of events and she quickly looked to the floor. Swiftly reaching down and grabbing Xena's breast dagger, the Queen sliced through the thick leather in heartbeats. Pushing her wife's naked body aside, Xena leapt from the pallet. The warrior had a crazed look in her eye as she searched the room for her clothes. Tugging on her breeches and leathers, she pulled the laces of the leather battle dress closed, and slipped into her boots. "Xena? Are you okay?" Gabrielle asked in total confusion. "I--I…" Xena stammered, but the warrior refused to raise her eyes to her wife. "Xe…I'm so sorry. I had no idea--" "It's…it's…I need some air." Xena rasped, swinging the door open and rushing out into the late afternoon sun. Gabrielle looked at the shredded toys that she purchased and wondered what in Hades just happened. Her wife just panicked at being tied up and made love to. That was definitely different. She rose up from the pallet and put her robe on, removing what remained of the leather straps. She wondered if she should run after Xena to try to explain, but with Xena, that was never a good idea. Gabrielle decided to give the warrior a candlemark or two to calm herself, but if she weren't back by then, the Queen would go looking for her herself. "Gabrielle," the young woman shook her head and spoke aloud. "The next time I wonder if something is a good idea…maybe I better just go with my first instinct!"
* * *
The small blonde reclined against a number of pillows stacked into their favorite corner by the fireplace. It was too warm for a fire, but it was still the coziest spot in the hut. She and Xena usually sat together, talking and making plans for the baby. It surprised the young Queen when she first heard Xena speaking of their family and a future. She never would have thought her warrior would ever become this domesticated, but it was as if Xena made a decision. The warrior confessed to Gabrielle that she wanted to be around for her wife and child. She couldn't afford to take foolish risks anymore, not with a family and a future to think about. Gabrielle cried tears of joy that night, watching her warrior sleep. She realized that for all these seasons, what kept Xena from enjoying any aspect of her life…it was the future. The warrior never thought she would last long enough within the mortal realm to ever fall in love, have a wife, and a family. Now that it was happening, Xena actually seemed relaxed. In the past, she stoically participated in Amazon life within the village, but it was usually for Gabrielle's benefit. Now, Xena appeared to actually take pleasure in a place that would become home, for herself, and those she loved. Gabrielle sat alone, but knew that as soon as the candle on the table burned down another quarter of a mark, she would go in search of her warrior. Before the thought was gone from her head, she heard the door softly open. She didn't look behind her; there was no need. She caught the unmistakable scent of her wife, that familiar combination of jasmine, leather, and wood smoke. She closed her eyes and breathed in, enjoying the feeling of comfort that scent provided. Xena removed two of the large pillows Gabrielle leaned against, sliding behind her wife and replacing the cushions with her body, the young Queen settling herself in her favorite position. "How do you feel, Xe?" Gabrielle wasn't sure what to ask.
"Incredibly stupid, that's how I feel." A small silence ensued before each woman attempted to break it at the same time. "Gabrielle…" "Xena…" They each paused a heartbeat, "I'm so sorry…" "I'm so sorry…" They said in unison, looking up at one another and smiling. Gabrielle noted her wife's red-rimmed eyes and knew the warrior had been out, crying tears of frustration for being less than perfect. "Xe, I am sorry…I never thought…I mean we've done that before, and--" Xena grasped her lover's hand and brought it to her lips. "Never like that," the warrior whispered softly against the fingertips pressed against her lips. "I'm sorry for over reacting, Brie. It's just that before…well, I've always had an out…you know, a way to release myself. This way I…I just had no… no…" "Control," Gabrielle finished knowingly. Xena lowered her head in shame and admission. She knew what this was telling her wife about the amount of trust she held in her. How could Xena explain, when she didn't understand it herself? Gabrielle turned in her wife's embrace in order to see her better. The Queen lifted the proud chin with her fingertips and looked again into the beautiful blue eyes she so loved. She could tell from the set of the warrior's
jaw that Xena was disappointed and angry with herself. The warrior had so few flaws to her character that Gabrielle understood how this affected the strong woman. Xena did what she always did. She pointed the finger at herself and found this to be some serious failing in her. Gabrielle looked deep into her wife's eyes until the warrior felt the young Queen must have surely been reading her thoughts. As always, the young woman said just the right words to ease the warrior's heartache. "Xe, I know this doesn't have anything to do with us." Xena gave her wife a small smile for her understanding. "I know you are the consummate warrior, and that there haven't been any situations that you haven't been able to get yourself out of. You do know, however, that someday that may happen. It's inevitable, my love. Someday you're going to run into a situation that you simply can't control. It will be out of your hands and I'm afraid that if you don't deal with that eventuality, it will hurt you…badly." Xena took the hand that stroked her cheek and placed a light kiss in the palm, entwining her own fingers within the smaller one. "I'm not sure I can change that about myself, Brie. I have always had a warrior's mentality. I never accept defeat because I've always managed to come out on top. Even when I have to lie and cheat my way out of a situation, I eventually win. Look at our lives, my heart. All that we've been through, all the pain, and yet now we know such happiness." "That doesn't mean that sadness can't still touch us," Gabrielle answered. The Queen watched her wife's face turn confused, her brows coming together. "Xe? What's wrong?" "What you just said, the Oracle of T¬ an told me that very thing. When we
were in the caverns on Delos, we ran into an old woman who said she was an Oracle," Xena related the events that she all but forgot before this moment. "You met the Oracle of T¬ an and you didn't tell me?" Gabrielle asked in amazement. "Frankly, I didn't think she was too famous…I never heard of her." "Now that surprises me, my all knowing warrior." Gabrielle smiled at the woman who smirked down at her. "Only some of the very oldest scrolls mention her. She's supposed to be an elder sister to the fates. It's said that it was she, who assisted Gaea in giving birth to Uranus, to form the world that we know. If it's true, then she was here long before the Gods, Olympian or otherwise, ever were," Gabrielle finished in excitement. "I can't believe you didn't tell me this." "Yea, well, we were a little busy once I got back if you'll remember," Xena grinned. Gabrielle grinned right back, feeling the twinges of desire that assaulted her earlier, returning. "Anyway," Xena continued. "I don't think she was much of an Oracle. She told me something terrible would happen, but that I would rise above it… something like that. Wait…no; she said a sadness, just like you just did. She said a great sadness would come upon me. Hades, everyone knew that! You were back here, somewhere between life and death because of Hera's spell over the Amazons and I didn't know if I would be able to defeat Hera in time. It didn't take an Oracle to give me a prediction like that." "Are you sure that was the incident she was referring to?" Gabrielle asked, a worried frown creasing her brow. "Sure…it was obvious," Xena replied. She had to admit to herself, however, that she hadn't really thought about the Oracle's words since that time.
"I'm sorry for throwing you in a panic…you know…earlier," Gabrielle apologized again. She turned and snuggled into Xena's embrace and the warrior kissed the top of the golden head. The warrior placed both her hands over the large swell of Gabrielle's stomach and caressed the swollen area, smiling when she felt the baby's kick against her hand. "I'm sorry I ruined your plans for the day…it seemed as if you had something very specific in mind," the warrior kissed the edge of her wife's ear, allowing the tip of her tongue to graze the skin there. Xena's smile grew when she felt the shiver that ran through Gabrielle's body. Oh yes, warrior…you still have a chance here. "Come on, let's go to bed." Xena stood, scooping her wife into her arms with her. "Are we through discussing this?" Gabrielle asked, desire sparkling in her eyes. "Oh yea…. I'm all through talking for the night," Xena replied. She leaned in and placed a passionate kiss on her wife's lips. Gabrielle's immediate responsiveness to the kiss told the warrior that her wife was indeed ready for pleasure. Gently placing Gabrielle onto the bed, she quickly removed her own boots. She slowly removed her clothes, standing before the young Queen who leaned up on one elbow to watch the seductive display. The last time Xena disrobed this way, strictly for Gabrielle's pleasure, was on their wedding night. Xena lay alongside her wife and began to pull open the wrap around shift Gabrielle wore. A small hand stopped her and the warrior looked up, captured by a very pensive expression. "What, love?" Xena reached in and brushed her lips lightly against her wife's.
Gabrielle paused before answering, her insecurities surrounding her own body, putting a damper on the overwhelming passion she felt moments before. "I look so different than the last time you touched me. I don't even know how we're going to manage this. I mean, I'm so huge, Xe--" "Brie." The compassionate tone in her wife's voice cut right through to the heart of the young Queen's fears. Xena's fingers tenderly caressed her wife's face. "Gabrielle, don't you know how beautiful you are like this?" Xena whispered, never stopping her hand's caresses. "You are absolutely breathtaking," she added. Gabrielle looked into her warrior's eyes and for the first time since she became pregnant, she actually believed it. She saw the truth of the warrior's words mirrored in blue eyes and finally, Gabrielle saw herself through her wife's eyes. "Why didn't you say it like this before?" the Queen asked. Xena paused and lay facing Gabrielle once more. Leaning upon a bent elbow, her head resting in the palm of her hand, she smiled that particular grin of embarrassment, the smile that would only ever be witnessed by this young Amazon Queen. "I was afraid it might…I don't know, frighten you. At the very least make you think you were married to some kind of pervert that gets off on pregnant women," Xena chuckled and Gabrielle laughed along with her. "Oh, Xe, the things you think of to worry over," Gabrielle wrapped her arms around Xena's neck, drawing her closer. "Thank you, love. You've made me feel more beautiful than ever. "You are Gabrielle. When we are quite old and can't even remember what these bodies looked like in our prime, I will always be looking at you and thinking how beautiful you are. It's because your beauty comes from the inside, my heart. It has very little to do with the exquisite shell that you
happen to be wrapped up in at the moment. You and I are destined to be together, Brie, I believe that now, with all my heart. Lifetime after lifetime, no matter what mortal guise we wear, you will always be mine. Your heart will always belong to me, just as you will forever possess mine." Xena punctuated the profound sentiment with a breath-stealing kiss, which left Gabrielle softly moaning and pleading for more. Xena slowly pulled the Queen's shift open and ran the palm of her hand across Gabrielle's belly. She bent down and kissed the smooth skin. Her hand slid up to tenderly cup a full breast, delighting in the way the flesh around the nipple pebbled and grew taut as her lips grew closer. She smiled inwardly, realizing that before long, she would be sharing this precious treasure with her child. She left a soft trail of kisses from the swollen belly, up to Gabrielle's lips, the young woman offering up a sigh into the teasing kiss upon her lips. "Oh, Xe…it feels so good…" "Mmm, you're absolutely right," Xena breathed in her ear, the warrior's touch, as well as her kisses becoming more passionate. Gabrielle's passion rose at the same pace as her warrior's and soon frustrated growls escaped from the smaller woman's throat. "Xe…this is so hard. I want to feel you pressed against me. I want to be able to feel you," Gabrielle pleaded through her kisses. "Roll over," Xena said quickly, "onto your side, facing away from me." Gabrielle complied, then felt Xena pull the shift completely from her, the warrior's body wrapping around her from behind. Xena's hands were everywhere at once, tender and demanding. The Queen could feel the tightened points of Xena's hard nipples, sliding against her back. She groaned loudly when Xena pressed her mound against the young woman's backside, leaving a wet trail as evidence of the warrior's arousal.
Xena kissed, licked, and nipped at her lover's skin, not able to get enough of the taste of her. Carefully, using a lighter than normal touch, she grasped the elongated nipples, pinching and pulling them ever so slightly. The sensation skyrocketed Gabrielle and she covered the warrior's hands with her own and pressed into the touch. "Yesss…harder," Gabrielle begged, pressing Xena's hands against her chest. The warrior tugged the flesh between her thumb and forefinger repeatedly, until Gabrielle was writhing and moaning against her. Sliding one hand between her wife's legs, Xena stroked the drenched folds of Gabrielle's sex. Gabrielle cried out at the pleasure as Xena's fingers explored her sex. The sensation was unbelievable and she wanted nothing more than to make this feeling last forever, but she could feel her climax already beginning. Xena's fingers pleasured her with expert care. Gabrielle reached her own hand up to touch the breast that Xena abandoned. Her slender fingers tugged at the sensitive nipple just as the warrior had done. Xena watched as Gabrielle thrust her body against the hand between her legs. The warrior could feel Gabrielle's body begin trembling with the small tremors she experienced just before release. She looked on as the Queen stroked her own breasts, and Xena knew she couldn't hang on long after that sight. "Oh, Gods, Brie!" Xena slid her own screaming clit against her wife's backside, while stroking Gabrielle's. Xena held out until Gabrielle screamed out the warrior's name and they lay there, wrapped around one another, shivering and shaking as aftershocks of pleasure passed through their bodies with even the slightest movement. "Gods! That was wonderful," Gabrielle exclaimed, "but too soon."
"What?" Xena asked. "I'm a little out of practice," Gabrielle turned her head with a seductive smile. "It felt so good, I couldn't hold out, but I didn't want it to be over so fast…I wanted it to last," she finished with disappointment. Xena chuckled, kissing her wife's neck and shoulders. "I have a plan beta for just such a problem," the warrior whispered in a voice that sent shivers up the small blonde's spine. "Oh? And, what would plan beta be?" "A repeat performance," the warrior expressed her intent by pressing her body against her wife's once more.
CHAPTER 2
"GABRIELLE!" Xena's impatient voice rang out and Gabrielle stopped in her tracks. She plastered an innocent expression on her face before turning to face her warrior. By the time she turned, Xena was at her side and grabbed the bucket of mud from the smaller woman's hands. "What?" Gabrielle tried to sound like she didn't know that she'd been caught. "Brie, this is way too heavy to be lifting. Sartori said that you needed to take it easy. That means rest, not helping me mortar the foundation." Xena's voice was sharper than she intended, but she was trying to make a
point. Gabrielle nearly scared the life out of her when she experienced a bout of painful stomach cramps a few days earlier. The pains eased up, eventually disappearing altogether. Sartori, the village healer, examined the Queen and could find nothing wrong with the young woman, but given the fact that the baby dropped so low, she advised Gabrielle not to do anything that might strain her abdominal or lower back muscles. Xena wiped her hands and pulled her dejected wife in for a hug. "I'm sorry, Brie, I didn't mean to yell, but I think it's important for you to listen to Sartori. I'm only concerned because--" "You love me," Gabrielle sighed. Xena chuckled at the young Queen's pout. "If only your subjects could see you now," she teased, touching a clean finger to the lower lip that Gabrielle stuck out. "Very funny, warrior. I'm sorry I'm not doing what I'm told, Xe, but I'm going crazy not being able to lift so much as my own dinner plate." "I know, my heart, but think of the consequences. Just do it my way for once, okay?" Xena asked. "But, you're doing all the work on the house!" "Sweetheart," Xena tried to control her laughter, "You are going to give birth to our child. You do realize that you're doing the hard part, right?" "I'm only having a baby. It's not the same as building a new house," Gabrielle replied. "Tell me that when your first labor pains hit," Xena mumbled to herself once she turned away and resumed working. "I thought you said it wouldn't be that bad?" Gabrielle looked truly frightened now. She thought the pain she went through giving birth to Hope was caused by the unnatural acceleration of the pregnancy.
Damn! Her hearing is getting better everyday. "I didn't mean it like that…I was just joking. I mean, it's not going to be painless, Brie, but some women, especially first time mothers, have their babies so fast, that there's no time for it to hurt." "Oh." Gabrielle said quietly, obviously thinking about that. "Just take it easy, all right?" Xena pleaded, slapping another handful of mud in between the roughly hewn logs. "Oh, okay," the dejected Queen finally gave in. "Promise?" Xena asked. She knew she was probably pushing it, but Gabrielle and their unborn baby's safety came above all else. "I promise…I don't have to like it, but I do promise to behave," Gabrielle promised. "I tell you what…let me clean all the mud off and I'll take you to the food hut for a midday meal. How does that sound?" Xena asked, knowing the only sure way to get her wife's mind off the subject. Gabrielle's eyes brightened immediately. "Now you're talking, warrior!" She exclaimed with a smile. * * *
Gabrielle drummed her fingers on the table impatiently. She looked around their now spacious surroundings and couldn't believe they once called this, the Queen's hut. It looked more like a mansion now. Xena started out intending to only add on a room. Something to give them a little more space and a place that in another season or so could be used as their child's bedroom, or their bedroom, depending on how they worked it. Naturally, being the Warrior Princess, she never did anything in a small
way. With some help from Eponin and a number of other Amazons, Xena was able to build two more rooms and a separate area to be used as a bathing chamber. Gabrielle rose and paced the room. "She's not going to a ball, just the food hut. What in Hades is taking her so long?" She said to no one but herself. The young woman began to tidy up. She'd rearranged the bedroom a hundred times already. Xena did what she promised to do since the day they became lovers. She built a warrior size bed for them. The baby's cradle sat beside the bed, one corner of their new bedroom situated for the child's cradle and other assorted items. A large chest already held clothes and diapers, everything they would need. Everything was ready and in place, but Gabrielle couldn't help arranging and rearranging until she knew she was going to drive her warrior mad. She lifted a small pile of clothes and bent to place them into the chest, on the floor. The strangest sensation of being watched came over the Queen, but when she stood, looking around the room, the warrior she expected to see smirking at her, was not there. She shook her head and grinned at herself, bending slightly to move the wooden cradle just a little bit more to the left. A white-hot bolt of pain seared its way across Gabrielle's abdomen. Her hands fell from the cradle she was attempting to move and she dropped to one knee from the pain's intensity. She reached out and clutched the side of the bed, her fingers clawing at the blanket and balling it under her fist. She finally found her voice enough to gasp, but as quickly as the pain came over her, it disappeared. Gabrielle wiped the sweat from her forehead and slowly eased herself back up until she was sitting on the bed. She took slow, deep breaths, running the palm of her hand over her large belly. She could still feel the after effects; small twinges in her abdomen that she knew weren't normal labor pains. Gabrielle sat and cursed herself for attempting to move the
cradle. She promised Xena she wouldn't do anything like that, yet the first time the warrior wasn't around she broke her word. She wasn't sure if it was that or the muscle spasm that hurt worse. "Hey, you must be famished by now." Xena strode into the room. "Y-Yea…you ready?" Gabrielle asked, rising slowly from the bed. She knew she should tell Xena about what just happened, but she also knew that Xena would be angry and disappointed in her. I swear, I will be more careful from now on, just don't let anything be wrong, Gabrielle silently prayed to any Gods willing to listen. Brie? Are you okay?" Xena asked.
More lies, to cover up the first one. Oh, forgive me, Xe. "Yes, of course. Ready to go?" Gabrielle put on a smile and headed for the door. Xena stopped to kiss her wife and they walked outside, toward the center of the village. Gabrielle felt no residual pain and thanked the Gods above for listening to her pleas. The only change in the young Queen was that she suddenly lost her appetite. Xena knew how that could be. You had a craving one moment, but once it passed, you were on to something else. The warrior never pushed or prodded. She simply rubbed her wife's back, watching as the young woman pushed her food around on her plate. * * *
Gabrielle felt her abdomen cramp up again and winced slightly. It wasn't the sharp pain that she experienced earlier, rather the discomfort she often felt when it was her time of the moon. The pains didn't seem to be increasing in intensity, only frequency. Unable to ignore her wife's
countenance any longer, Xena leaned over to whisper in Gabrielle's ear. "Brie, what's wrong? Are you in pain?" The look of understanding and concern on her warrior's face caused Gabrielle to rethink her earlier idea of keeping silent about breaking her promise. Something was wrong and her only thoughts were of her baby's welfare now, not the fact that this would probably start a fight between she and Xena. The young Queen decided to tell the warrior exactly what happened. "Xe, I--Oh Gods!" Gabrielle grabbed the edge of the table as a particularly strong spasm shot through her abdomen. "Gabrielle, what's wrong?" Xena looked up sharply. The others at the Queen's table were beginning to realize something was wrong and paused in their own meals or conversations to watch the Queen and her Consort. "Oh, Xe…I--I…" Gabrielle willed the words to her tongue, but they wouldn't come. She needed to tell Xena the truth. She, of all people, knew where lies and half-truths could bring a couple. "Gabrielle, you are in pain, aren't you?" Gabrielle nodded. "It's like my time of the moon, at least it started out that way. Now it's getting worse. Oh, Xe, I--" "Sshh, love," Xena slipped her hand inside Gabrielle's shift and placed it, palm side down, against the lowest part of her wife's belly. Gabrielle felt another cramp begin and tensed. "There was that it, did you feel the pain just now?" Xena questioned. Gabrielle could only nod her head again. She looked up into her wife's blue eyes, expecting to see fear or worry. Instead, a broad smile broke out
across Xena's face. "Brie, it's all right. I think your labor pains have started, that's all there is to it. Gods, your good, woman, almost nine moons to the day." Are you sure, that's all, Xena? I mean, my water didn't even break yet." "It will, not to worry. How long have you been having them?" "Since just before we came to lunch." Gabrielle finally let herself relax. It wasn't something she'd done at all; it was simply her labor beginning. There was nothing wrong with her baby. She allowed herself a weak grin in her wife's direction. "I guess it's time, huh?" "I guess so, my heart," the warrior grinned back * * *
Sartori felt Gabrielle's abdomen just as Xena did moments earlier. "Do you two want to go home or over to the healer's hut?" The healer asked. "Home," they both answered in unison. "Well, since the contractions are coming closer together, why don't you two head over there? I'll go get some things I'll need and Adia and I will meet you there. Gabrielle, who will bless the child?" Sartori asked about the blessing, knowing that Gabrielle's best friend within the village was Ephiny. It was still a formality that had to be taken care of. This wasn't just any child coming into the world; this was the Queen's heir. If it was a boy, he would be blessed in the Amazon fashion, and the Gods thanked. If the child of the Queen and her consort were a girl,
the infant would be blessed in the same manner, but she would immediately be recognized as Amazon royalty and given Gabrielle's right of caste. The Queen's Consort would then present the child to Artemis for her blessing. Xena and Gabrielle walked from the large food hut. The tall warrior had her arm wrapped around the young Queen's shoulder, moving at a very slow pace to accommodate the smaller woman. Xena was nervous now. She'd been through this before when she gave birth to Solon, and she remembered how difficult and painful her own labor was. It stabbed at her heart to think of Gabrielle going through that kind of pain. She knew her wife would consider it all worth it, just as she had when it was over, but that didn't make it any easier to take right now. "Oh, Gods!" Gabrielle paused and squeezed the hand Xena offered. The pains were coming one after another and suddenly Gabrielle felt the wet warmth that she knew could only be one thing. "Great," the Queen muttered. Xena took in the dark stain on Gabrielle's shift and nodded her understanding. "Your water broke?" Gabrielle nodded and took a step forward. The moment she placed her foot on the ground a pain unlike any of the others ripped through her body. She screamed and fell back, Xena's arms scooping her up before she fell to the dirt. "Brie!" Xena cradled Gabrielle's body to her own. "It hurts…Gods, Xe!" Gabrielle hissed out between clenched teeth. "Something feels wrong." Gabrielle didn't have to explain any more than that. Xena knew that her wife had a sense about things, being half Goddess; she had abilities that Xena stopped questioning. She turned away from the path that led to their home and moved toward the healer's hut. She met Sartori and Adia coming her
way. "Something's wrong," Xena said in a tense voice. Both Healer's stopped and turned to rush ahead of the warrior, carrying the near hysterical Queen. Ephiny appeared only moments later to find the Healer's hut in a state of controlled chaos. Adia handed Sartori herbs as she mixed some medicines together, while Xena tried desperately to calm her wife, who was nearly shrieking in pain. Sartori pressed a small piece of root into Xena's hand. The warrior immediately recognized the plant and knew what to do. "Brie, baby, look at me," Xena requested. Gabrielle focused terrified eyes on her wife and the calmness that Xena willed into her gaze infected the Queen. Xena moved Gabrielle forward on the pallet and sat behind her, the support immediately lessening the lower back pain the young woman was experiencing. "Bite down on this, love," Xena said, slipping the small piece of root into her wife's mouth. Gabrielle was in no position to argue. She bit into the soft root and obeyed Xena's further instructions. She pressed down, swallowing the saliva that tasted like almonds. The effects were immediate, as Gabrielle felt lightheaded. Her pain was still there, but for some reason she felt slightly disconnected from it. Xena searched her wife's eyes and noticed the telltale glazed over look. She also took note that Gabrielle's breathing slowed down considerably, the undesirable side effect to the medicinal pain-killing root. "Spit it out, Brie." Xena commanded, holding her hand in front of her wife's mouth. When the young woman spit out what remained, the warrior tossed it away, looking up at Sartori. The Healer wore a fresh apron and bent down to
examine Gabrielle. "Oh Gods!" Gabrielle exclaimed, pressing herself into Xena's strong body behind her. "Okay, Gabrielle it's a contraction, don't try to fight it or bear down, just try to work with it the way we discussed." Gabrielle closed her eyes to concentrate on going with the flow of the contraction. She could feel the pressure between her legs and suddenly the cramping sensation was easing up. "Good…good job. I can just see the baby's head. You're doing fine, Gabrielle," Sartori encouraged. Gabrielle's scream took everyone by surprise, especially the Healers and Xena, who knew she shouldn't be able to experience the pain because of the herb's anesthetic properties. The young woman went rigid in Xena's arms, not even able to breath. The pain was unlike anything Gabrielle ever felt before. She knew that if a blade sliced her belly open to the core; it would have felt just like this. She never knew a person could experience or tolerate this much pain and still be conscious. "Something's wrong!" Xena shouted over Gabrielle's screams to Sartori. "The baby's nearly here. Gabrielle you have to try, just push once," Sartori shouted back. Gabrielle didn't think she could. She didn't think she could even breathe much longer. She could hear Xena talking to her, but she wasn't able to make out the words…just sounds, wonderful, loving sounds of strength and encouragement. She took a deep gulp of air and pushed. The pain was worse when she did, but Gabrielle grit her teeth and willed her mind to forget the pain for her baby's sake. She felt something like a release, and then the pressure between her legs was gone, replaced by a warm wetness.
"That's it!" Sartori cried out. "It's a girl," she held the child up to clear an airway. Before either the parents or anyone else could breathe a sigh of relief or speak congratulations, they waited for the cry. The silence was deafening. Xena held Gabrielle as she watched Sartori frantically clear the baby's mouth and nose, smack the infants' bottom, rub its chest, anything to induce that first breath of life. Gabrielle screamed once more as another volley of spasms took control of her body. "Adia," Sartori held the child up for her own wife. "It's the afterbirth," she commented quickly. Xena was still splitting her attention between the woman who writhed in agony in her arms and her child. Adia and Ephiny were hunched over the baby, attempting to breath air into its lungs, Adia pulled some powders from the shelf and Xena could see her try one after another on the baby's tongue, all while Ephiny attempted to breath for the baby, massaging her tiny chest. Gabrielle fell still and Sartori looked even more worried than before. Xena felt powerless and was about to rise from the bed to assist in saving her child. "She's bleeding," the Healer stated. Sartori's face looked strained yet she moved quickly and without panic. She set the package of the afterbirth aside, as was the custom for the blessing. She also pushed a handful of cloth bandages to the floor. Xena looked down at the bandages in uncharacteristic silence. They weren't just bloody cloths; they were completely soaked in blood. The Healer repeated the action and Xena could only watch as Sartori pushed large cloths to the floor, saturated in Gabrielle's blood. Gabrielle felt pain free at last, but tired and cold, so very cold. She wanted to close her eyes and go to sleep, but her baby…she knew something was
wrong and couldn't focus on the chaos around her to know what was happening. She hadn't heard her baby cry. A terrible fear clutched at her heart and the pain was nearly as great as the physical pain she suffered from moments ago. She knew now that her labor hadn't been normal. She'd done something to her baby because of her own stubbornness. Xena would hate her, but she had to tell her wife that she was responsible for whatever was happening to their child. "Xe…" Xena looked down at her wife's face just as Gabrielle's head hit the warrior's shoulder, slumping to one side. Gabrielle's eyes fluttered as if she were struggling to keep them open. That's when Xena heard both voices come at her. "I can't stop the bleeding," Sartori's voice was tinged with fear. "I don't know what else to do," Adia sighed in defeat. Xena watched as Sartori jumped up from her position at the end of the bed. The Healer moved two wooden blocks over to the end of the bed. The warrior saw that Ephiny continued to breath for the tiny infant, but Xena knew it was too long. She made the only decision she felt she could make. "Brie? Gabrielle!" Xena gently slapped her wife's face until the green eyes tried to pull her into focus. "Stay awake, baby. Don't go to sleep." Xena slipped out from behind the young woman and moved to the end of the bed, lifting it up as Sartori placed the large blocks under the rear legs of the pallet. The end of the bed was raised up into the air and Xena quickly returned to Gabrielle's side. "Brie! Stay with me, baby." Gabrielle did all she could do to muster a weak smile for her wife. "I'm so cold, Xe. Xena, I've done something…I have to tell you…" "Sshh…" Xena calmed the young woman, quickly jabbing two fingers at
the area where Gabrielle's thigh met her hip. "You're cold because you're bleeding too much, Brie. I'm going to use the pinch on this area to stop the flow of blood, then I'll release it after a few seconds. That should eventually slow it down, okay?" Gabrielle squeezed her wife's hand in response. Xena looked up as she repeatedly released the pinch from her wife's artery. She watched with tears filling her eyes as Ephiny and Adia took turns breathing their own air into her child's body. She brusquely wiped the tears away, turning back and releasing the ancient hold on Gabrielle once more. She had to make a decision. She couldn't take her attention away from her wife, and so, she had to leave her child's life in the hands of competent and caring friends. She'd lost Gabrielle before, she was determined not to let her beloved's life slip away again. When Xena looked up at Gabrielle, she saw the Queen more alert, looking on the scene of Adia, Ephiny, and their child. When the Queen's eyes pulled themselves away to look into her Consort's eyes, their exchanged gaze spoke the truth. Xena and Gabrielle both knew that too much time had passed. The unspoken acknowledgment passed between them and tears fell from the Queen's eyes as she laid her head back down. Her eyes held an incredible pain and guilt so immense, Gabrielle wasn't sure she knew how to overcome it. At the same time, Xena watched her wife, her own gaze screaming out her frustrated helplessness and overwhelming anger. Xena released the pinch again, silently counting the beats between releases. "Xena, it's slowing," Sartori said, tossing more bandages aside. She couldn't look up at the warrior, her own guilt over the situation behind her apparent. The second Sartori spoke those words; Xena shot up and crossed the room to where her child lay. She knew. She knew when she pushed her friends aside and attempted to breathe life in to her child's limp and
unmoving body, she knew it would do no good. The warrior tried every healer's trick she'd ever been taught, even using a few herbs that surprised Adia. Time passed quickly, but to Xena those long moments in time lasted an eternity. "I'm…I'm so sorry, Xena…it's been too long," Adia's tears stained her own face as she watched her friend lean her body protectively over her baby, her large hands stroking the dark head. Xena nodded her head when she felt Ephiny's hand on her shoulder, but she didn't move. She couldn't bring herself to step away from the child. That would be to admit that it was over. It was with a supreme effort that she stood and looked at Ephiny. "Bless her," Xena said in a voice thick with emotion. "Xena, she--" "Do it! Please, Eph…it's the only way they'll know." The warrior choked out the rest. Ephiny immediately understood why Xena wanted the blessing. Amazon royalty were blessed at birth as heirs to the throne. This way, their heritage or parentage could never come into question. The warrior wanted people to forever remember that this child belonged to Xena of Amphipolis and Gabrielle of Potidaea. The Regent nodded and turned to bathe the tiny, still figure. Xena moved to the bed where Sartori already stripped the blood soaked sheets from the bed and put fresh bandages in place. Xena gently sat beside her wife, taking her hand in her own. Gabrielle's eyes opened, her jaw clenched against what she knew her wife was about to say. "Brie…" Xena whispered hoarsely, trying to keep a reign on her own emotions. "I know," Gabrielle replied flatly.
Ephiny placed a tiny feather choker around the baby's neck, smudging herbs across her cheeks and forehead. She wrapped the child up in a clean blanket and picked the still body up. "What will she be named?" The Regent asked, looking between Xena and Gabrielle as the Queen and her Consort sat gazing at one another. "Brianna," Xena answered without hesitation. Gabrielle looked into the blue eyes filled with as much pain and sadness as her own. They argued many nights back and forth about their baby's name. The young Queen was adamant about not naming her daughter after herself. Xena, on the other hand, wanted their first child to be called at least something similar to the name that she loved so well. The stoic, dark-haired woman refused to cry, attempting to be strong for her wife. Xena's voice left no room for discussion, however, as to what their daughter would be named. Gabrielle looked over at Ephiny and nodded, returning her gaze to the warrior who looked as if the rug had just been pulled away from her entire life. Gabrielle squeezed Xena's hand, acquiescing to her wife's wish. She ground her teeth together listening to the sounds of Ephiny's chanting. She would not fall apart. Gabrielle would not allow herself to cry any more tears. She would bear it as an Amazon Queen should, knowing her wife was in as much pain as she. Ephiny turned and held the infant's body in her arms. She wasn't sure either of the women wanted to actually hold the child, and so she simply stood there. "The Princess Brianna," she whispered softly. "Daughter of Queen Gabrielle and her Consort Xena of Amphipolis." Gabrielle took some very deep breaths and Xena could see that the young Queen was trying very hard not to break down.
Xena could only look on the sight of her wife, her jaw clenching and releasing as she fought back tears. This seemed to be the last straw. One last knife in her warrior's heart was the sight of her tender and compassionate wife, stifling back her own emotions. Xena was keeping a tenuous hold on her quickly mounting anger, anger brought on by this immense sorrow. That hold snapped when Xena rose from the bed, holding out her arms for her child. Ephiny placed the infant in its mother's arms, gazing in concern at the expression in Xena's eyes. "Xena?" Ephiny asked. "Now she meets Artemis!" Xena sneered. The warrior turned toward the entrance and strode angrily out, slamming the door loudly behind her.
CHAPTER 3
XENA DIDN'T REALLY want to examine her feelings or even think about what she actually held in her arms. Her warrior's brain pushed aside the pain and the agony of her broken heart. She placed emotions like that into a spot where they couldn't interfere with her capabilities as a warrior. She shoved to one corner of her conscious mind, the fact that she had a wife back in the Healer's hut whose world was falling apart also. A sharp stab, like a thorn penetrating her skin, pierced her heart. It was difficult to put on that warrior's mask when it came to Gabrielle. She briefly thought of the horror of the crimes she committed when her only child, Solon, was murdered. She remembered the anguish and completely empty state of her heart. That's what Gabrielle was going through right now
and it frightened the warrior. It wasn't exactly what her wife would do, that worried the dark-haired woman. What terrified Xena the most was that she didn't know what she would do. She didn't know if she could be there for Gabrielle. How could she be a source of strength, to encourage her wife to grieve, heal, and then continue with her life, when Xena felt like falling apart herself? Through all of the life and death tragedies the warrior and her bard suffered, it always fell on one of them to carry the load for the other. Over the seasons, it became a truly equal partnership. When Xena felt she'd lost her way, Gabrielle was always there…her beacon, the light that would guide her. When Gabrielle found herself lost in the trials and consequences of life, Xena's love for her bard was always the one thing that could be counted upon. Now, the two women found themselves faced with perhaps the greatest challenge of their lives. This time they both hurt. This time one could not carry the load for the other. Xena looked down at the baby in her arms. Her lips were pale and lifeless, but otherwise she looked as if she were sleeping. The warrior paused at the entrance to Artemis' temple. She looked down on her daughter's lifeless body and reached down to kiss her forehead. "It's not that I don't love you, my Bri, nor will I ever forget you, but your mother needs me, maybe more than she ever has before. I have to be hard and strong for her. You understand, don't you?" Xena paused as if expecting some sort of answer. She swallowed her tears and pushed the doors to the Temple open. Striding purposefully up to the altar, she laid her daughter gently down across the polished stone. "Artemis! Your faithful requests your presence!" Xena shouted out. I took only heartbeats for the Goddess' shape to materialize from shimmering sparkles, to the tall, lithe form of Artemis. Her gray eyes immediately smiled at the offering on her alter.
"Xena, at last…Apollo will awfully upset he missed--" Artemis scanned the warrior's mind. Unlike her brother, Apollo, she felt no qualms at invading the mortal's minds in her care. She stared hard at the warrior and the vehemence projected from the warrior's thoughts was like a physical blow to the tall Goddess. "No," she stated, "that wasn't fated to happen!" Artemis rushed to the lifeless form and tenderly lifted the child to her. Her own heart ached and she reached out to touch her brother's mind. It was rare, but Apollo's thoughts were unavailable to her. "I'll be back," Artemis hissed and instantly disappeared. The Goddess reappeared moments later, but she stood in a great hall, massive spinning wheels turning and weaving threads in enormously complex patterns. An eerie blue light glowed, now and again changing to green, them magenta. The Fates went about their tasks, the women never bothering to look up when Artemis came forward. The Olympian Gods only came here for one reason, which was when they didn't like the way the threads fell. "Do you see this?" Artemis tried to control the rage in her voice. It did no good to anger the three women, who literally held her mortal's lives within their hands. Clotho looked up first. "A mortal child." "Yes, the child of my chosen and her Consort. The child is dead," Artemis replied. "That is impossible. Look," Atropos indicated a bright white thread, still glistening with its newness. "This is the child of Xena and Gabrielle, the Princess Brianna." "This is the child, just from its mother's womb!" Artemis held the baby out before her.
All three sisters passed their hands over the lifeless form to ascertain the truth of the child's identity. They exchanged worried glances at the impossibility of the situation. "This cannot be," Lachesis sat down near the glistening thread. "This was not fated for the child of Xena and Gabrielle, this was not the way. See, the thread still holds strong." Atropos tested threads further away from the bright one of the baby, Brianna, to discover that threads were darkening and shriveling up farther and farther down the line. "This child's fate was to touch so many lives…to save so many. The threads are changing because the child will no longer live to bring salvation to those in the future. Innocents will die over this." "The structure of humanity will change over this," Clotho added. "We will call upon our sister, we have no other choice." "She will not listen. It will be useless to summon her, she has never desired to intervene." "The Oracle of Taan is our only hope. She will not wish to see humanity's destruction." Clotho looked at the Goddess. "There is nothing we can do to reverse what has befallen the infant. A powerful hand was needed to change the will of the Fates. There are few with that power. We will do what we can, but the mortals are not to know of this incident." Artemis understood why they gave her that directive. The last thing the Fates wanted to get out was the fact that there might possibly be a power in the universe that could outwit them. She nodded and left the great hall. * * *
It was only heartbeats later, within the mortal realm, when Artemis appeared before Xena again. The Goddess felt the wave of anguish as soon as she materialized before the warrior. She may not be able to tell Xena the outcome of her talk with the Fates, but she was not about to let her chosen, who just happened to be her niece, lose her firstborn child. The Goddess cradled the infant within her arms; a soft warm glow surrounded her hand as it made it's way across the child's flesh. Artemis worked twice as long as necessary, trying to bring life back into the child. Nothing happened, the baby didn't even stir and Xena looked on in heartbreak, even as Artemis gazed at the warrior in confusion. "I don't understand. I have always had Athena's blessing to heal," Artemis whispered. The Goddess reached her mind out to encounter her sister's mind. She begged, searching the universe for Athena's thoughts, they were as absent to her as her brother's were earlier. Artemis walked down the steps and approached the warrior again. "I'm sorry, Xena. I'm so very sorry. I swear to you, I won't rest until I find out who took your child's life." As much as she detested most of the Gods, she was perfectly willing to risk anything to be able to place her living, breathing daughter in her mother's arms. Xena's eyes burned blue fire in the Goddess' direction. The warrior hated relying on others. It was nearly impossible for her to bring her child here, knowing it was tantamount to begging. She hated not being in control of the situation, having her fate placed in another's hands. Xena set her jaw firmly in place. "Neither will I."
The warrior took the child from Artemis' grasp, and she carefully cradled the infant in her arms as if the child were still alive. Xena didn't say another word to the tall Goddess who appeared as distressed as the warrior herself did. Xena turned and left the Temple, making her way back to the Healer's hut. The warrior cursed the fact that she would have to tell her wife that she failed. * * *
"Xe?" Gabrielle called out. The Queen didn't even have to ask. She could see, by the look on her wife's face, there would be no miracles for their child. Ephiny sat by Gabrielle's side. She patted her friend's hand and moved to leave the hut. Sartori and Adia rose to leave also. "We'll give you some privacy," Adia said to no one in particular. She squeezed her friend's arm as she passed the warrior with the body of her child in her arms. It was long moments later, when it was only Xena and Gabrielle left in the room, before the warrior lifted her eyes to her wife. She noticed Gabrielle's color was a little better, but only just. "I'm so sorry, Brie. I--I couldn't…" Xena trailed off, fearing her tears would start. She would be useless to Gabrielle if she broke down, so she swallowed up the pain and the regret, and all the guilt she felt, and moved to lay the lifeless infant in Gabrielle's arms. Xena hesitated, pulling back slightly, wondering if Gabrielle would rather not hold a child that she would soon have to put to rest. Gabrielle held her arms out and the warrior gently placed the delicate bundle in her wife's embrace. Xena sat beside the young woman, leaning
down to place a tender kiss on the Queen's forehead. "She could practically be asleep, Xe. If I didn't know better, I would think she was sleeping," Gabrielle said in a far away, dreamy kind of voice. Xena realized Sartori must have given her a painkiller or a sedative. "See, I knew she would have your hair color…see?" Gabrielle lovingly stroked the thick patch of hair on top of the child's head. "Yes, my heart, I see…you were right," Xena replied. The warrior put an arm around her wife and the two women said their own goodbyes to the child that they would never see grow. At length Ephiny came back in and accepted the child. She told Gabrielle they would begin the purification and would send the Princess' spirit to the Amazon Land of the Dead on the sacred flames. Once Xena and Gabrielle were alone, they simply stayed close and held onto one another. "Xe?" Gabrielle asked. "Yes, my heart?" "I want to go home…I want to sleep in my own bed." The warrior pulled back to look into her wife's eyes. Gabrielle hadn't really accepted anything yet. Her face held a drugged sort of expression, but she looked so tired. "I'll check with Sartori," Xena responded. Xena returned a few moments later, followed by the Healer. "I'll come see you in the morning, Gabrielle," Sartori touched the side of the Queen's face. "Check the bandages for any bleeding," she whispered to Xena. Xena nodded and tucked an extra blanket around the still pale woman. The warrior easily lifted the young Queen into her arms and they left the
Healer's hut. Gabrielle buried her face against Xena's neck, wrapping her arms around the warrior's neck. Xena looked neither right nor left, not caring to meet the sorrowful glances directed their way. She carried the precious bundle in her arms and placed her in their own bed. She went to make a cup of warm tea for the both of them, suddenly needing something to keep her busy. When the warrior returned to the bedroom, she saw Gabrielle reaching out with one hand to gently rock the cradle that lay beside the bed. "Do you want me to move that, Brie?" Gabrielle looked up and shook her head. "Not yet," she said simply. The two women settled into bed, Xena's strong embrace tighter than normal around her wife. There were no words to say, not yet anyway. Each woman buried herself in her own pain and guilt. The hurt was the same for each of them; only the reasons for their guilt were different. Xena burned with the shame of failing to save her child's life. She knew there must have been something more she could have done, some way to save Gabrielle and their baby at the same time. Gabrielle knew that she would have to live with this guilt for the rest of her life. She knew in her heart, that she killed their baby, just as surely as if it had been a knife she plunged into the child. If she'd listened and not acted like a stubborn child, she never would have overexerted herself to the point where she put her child's life in jeopardy. She knew she would have to tell Xena. Of course, she also felt that if she admitted her crime to her wife, Xena's love would quickly grow cold. Normally, she would never dream that a tragedy like this would be able to drive a wedge between she and her wife, but she already killed Xena's first child. Would her warrior be able to handle Gabrielle being at fault a second time? With one act, one moment in time, Gabrielle felt she destroyed, not only her baby's life, but her marriage, too. Everything she held dear to her was now slipping from her grasp and she could do no more than watch as
it slid away and shattered against the earth.
CHAPTER 4
GABRIELLE'S SCREAMS STARTLED Xena from her own fitful sleep. The young Queen thrashed about, Xena finally able to hold on to her and bring the young woman against the warrior's own body, to still her movements until she awoke more fully. "It's all right, Brie, just a bad dream," Xena said while stroking the young woman's hair. Gabrielle pulled slightly away from Xena, looking down at her own stomach, and absently placing the flat of her hand against her abdomen. She looked up at Xena and all the previous candlemarks flashed by her mind's eye in a swirling rush. The young woman remembered the events and looked at her wife, tears filling deep green eyes until they spilled down her pale cheeks. "Oh Xe, I'm so sorry…" Gabrielle sobbed. She slumped forward, Xena quickly pulling the small woman back into her embrace. Gabrielle's wracking sobs shook her small frame. The warrior held her wife, wishing she could join her in her tears, but Xena refused. She had to remain strong for Gabrielle. Falling apart would never do. She would wait, and then later, when the crisis was over and Gabrielle was stronger, then she would allow herself to examine her own pain. Now, she swallowed the rising anger and hurt down, holding Gabrielle closer, and rocking her body in a soothing motion. "It's okay, baby…I'm here," Xena whispered repeatedly. "You have nothing
to be sorry about, my heart." The warrior kissed the top of the blonde head, stroking Gabrielle's face, wiping the wet tear stained cheeks with her hands. "I'm right here, Brie. Talk to me, love." "Xena…I--I…" she looked up into the blue depths of the warrior's eyes, seeing only love and understanding in her wife's gaze.
Why isn't she angry? Cursing the Gods or even screaming? Gabrielle couldn't bring herself to admit it. She wanted to tell Xena, to unburden her own heart, but the warrior looked at her as though she was willing to do anything for Gabrielle. The Queen was taken back once more by the selflessness within her spouse's heart. She only ever thinks of me, Gabrielle thought to herself. "Talk to me, my heart," Xena repeated. At last, Gabrielle shook her head slowly back and forth. "I can't," she muttered. Xena settled the young woman against her larger body once more. "I understand," she pulled back to kiss her wife's forehead. "Whenever you're ready, Brie. I'll be right here." * * *
Gabrielle opened her eyes when she felt a gentle kiss on her cheek. Xena sat on the outside edge of the bed, fully dressed, and reached out to brush her fingers against her wife's cheek. "Morning," Xena said. "Morning," Gabrielle returned, trying to match the look of love in her
warrior's eyes. "How do you feel, Brie? Any pain or cramping?" Gabrielle shook her head back and forth, in answer to the latter question, but ignored the first. Xena seemed to understand and didn't press. "I need to check the bandages and packing, unless you'd rather have Sartori do it?" Xena said tentatively. "No, Xe…I think I'd rather have you do it." Xena removed the bandages and the packing that the Healer left in place after the great amount of bleeding Gabrielle experienced. "How does it look?" Gabrielle cautiously raised her head to see what Xena was doing. "Good. Actually, there's hardly a spot on these cloths. I find that a little strange, Brie. You bled more than anyone I've ever seen that didn't have a fatal battle wound. I'll put these fresh bandages in place under your breeches just in case." "I really don't understand it, though," Xena repeated, shaking her head. "Guess you're getting to be as fast a healer as me." Xena said as she rose and poured some water from a pitcher into a bowl to wash her hands. The warrior came and sat by her wife's side once more. "Tired?" She asked, running her hands through Gabrielle's golden hair. Gabrielle nodded. Her eyes, swollen from crying, felt scratchy and burned. "It's to be expected. You've been through a lot" "We've been through a lot," Gabrielle interrupted, squeezing the hand that now held her own. "Yes, but my body didn't go through the same physical trauma that yours
did," Xena answered. "You need rest and lots of it." "Xe, I need to tell you--" "Sshh…" Xena pressed two fingers against Gabrielle's lips, preventing the young woman from continuing. "All I want you to do is rest today, Brie, no heavy thoughts. Give your body a chance to heal. Okay?" Gabrielle offered her wife a weak smile and Xena helped to make the young woman more comfortable, pulling the thick blanket up to the small blonde's chin. The warrior situated herself beside Gabrielle, stroking her hair and face, feeling the young woman relax little by little. Eventually, Gabrielle's deep even breathing told the warrior that her wife was finally asleep. Unfortunately, as soon as Gabrielle fell into a deep sleeping pattern, the nightmares were there. The Queen didn't wake, but her moans and soft cries tore at Xena's heart in a way that nothing else in life could. The darkhaired woman pulled the sleeping form closer, rubbing her back, and stroking her hair. With a deep sigh, Xena tilted her head back against the bed's headboard and let her own pain wash over her. It was an odd transformation, almost physical, as the warrior let down her guard for just a few moments. The expression on her face, which only moments before was full of love and compassion for her partner, turned into one of anguish. She thought if she could release some of her pain and hurt, just a little at a time, then lock it back up again, at least she would be more of a help to her wife. Gabrielle didn't need the added burden of worrying about how Xena was handling the loss of their child. The warrior would simply handle her grief privately, and then be there for Gabrielle when her wife needed her. And so, the warrior let the tears spill from her eyes, silent sobs causing only slight tremors to shake through her body. She kissed the top of her wife's head, the warrior's tears splashing onto the small figure in her embrace. Like the consummate warrior she was, Xena took control of herself and stilled her tears after only a short time. Taking deep breaths,
her fingers curled into tight fists, she fought the need to scream and curse at the world around them. Gabrielle finally slept, but Xena could tell that nightmarish images still plagued the Queen's rest. The young woman's body twitched and jerked, with her moans occasionally turning to cries. Xena sat at the small wooden table, and nibbled at some bread and cheese. Eponin brought it by and seemed as reluctant to speak as Xena did. Warriors had different ways of coming to terms with death than others, so the two sat on the steps of the veranda. The Amazon inquired as to Gabrielle's well being and they spoke of hunting, fishing, even combat training for the younger Amazons. When Eponin stood to go, she placed one hand on Xena's shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. Without looking up, Xena placed her own hand over the Amazon's. "Thanks, Ep." "No problem, my friend. Make sure Gabrielle eats something." Eponin didn't have to tell Xena to be sure she ate. She was a warrior, and would eat for nourishment and strength, no matter how little of an appetite she had. So, Xena sat at the table, her hands warmed by a hot mug of tea, and took small bites of the food before her. It lay, tasteless on her tongue, but her warrior's instinct for survival pushed her to chew and swallow, repeating the action until she couldn't bear to take another bite. Xena felt the chill in the room as the sun crept lower in the sky. She always enjoyed summer and the evenings when it took Apollo many candlemarks to pilot his chariot toward the horizon. She got up and checked on Gabrielle, sleeping silently at last. She would visit the food hut in a while and wake her wife then. Some warm broth would do the exhausted Queen much good. The warrior pulled the blanket back over her wife's body and leaned down, pressing a tender kiss against the sleeping woman's temple. Xena
stepped outside and walked to the back of the house, to a woodpile that she laid in last season. Stacking a few logs in her arms, she heard the sound of someone clearing their throat. When Xena turned, she saw two of Gabrielle's Royal Guard. The Guard were always stationed at the Queen's home and these two were probably walking the area, when they spotted the warrior. They just stared for a moment, until the taller of the two worked up her courage to speak. "Our hearts are with the both of you, your Highness," she said. "Thank you, we cherish the thoughts," Xena replied using the customary Amazon statement. Xena mounted the steps back into the house, thinking how uncharacteristic it was for her to have taken part in such a traditional conversation. The Guards offered her the customary sentiment on the loss of a loved one. The two women looked a little taken back at the warrior's response, but Xena knew it's what Gabrielle would have said. It wasn't as if she was unaware of Amazon custom, therefore she responded with the expected response when offered bereavement thoughts from the two Guards. Right now, Xena knew she had to take her wife's place in front of these people. She would have to be Gabrielle's Consort and hold up her end of things. For once, she couldn't frown or roll her eyes at the Amazon's longstanding customs. Xena would have to take a deep breath and try her best to be the Consort this village expected. Xena walked in to find Gabrielle sitting up in bed, her eyes still held the confusion of sleep. A chill breeze entered the room with the warrior and Gabrielle pulled the blanket around her shoulders. "Just give me a moment to get a fire lit," Xena said as she placed the logs in the fireplace, "and it will warm up in no time." "It's funny how the heat can be scorching during the day, yet the instant the sun goes down, I'm freezing, Gabrielle answered.
True to her word, Xena had a blaze going in no time and it quickly took the chill off the room. "How do you feel?" Xena asked in concern, coming over to sit beside her wife. The warrior noticed the dark shadows under the Queen's eyes, due in part to the amount of blood she lost the previous day. Xena also understood that no matter how long Gabrielle slept, if the nightmares continued to plague her sleep, the young woman would never get any rest. They had quite a bit of personal experience with that scenario a few seasons back. After Gabrielle's attack, violent images began to haunt her sleeping moments until she looked like a wraith. The young woman was so tiny, it only took a few days, and she lost weight, and sleep, at an alarming rate. Xena could see the same troubled expression in Gabrielle's eyes as she did back then. "Like I could use a hot bath. Do you think…I mean, would it be okay?" Gabrielle asked. "It should be fine. Let me go and set some water on the fire in there." Xena replied, gone to fulfill the request before Gabrielle could say another word. Xena designed the bathing chamber like the one's they had in Athens. A large tank outside the house held water and when a spigot was turned inside, the water rushed into the large basin. During the summer, the sun heated the water in the outside tank, making for a nice temperature for bathwater. Xena filled the basing for her wife, adding a few drops of the hyacinth oil Gabrielle loved. Once filled, she started a fire in the fireplace and placed two metal containers, filled with water, over the heat. "I've got some water over the fire now. It should be ready in no time." Xena came back into the room and addressed the small blonde. Gabrielle wore a long robe, made of a light, cottony material. She sat on the edge of the bed, staring down at her own hands. She felt the mattress shift as Xena sat down beside her and watched as her wife's large hand
reached across to cover her own. Without the warrior's greaves covering her forearms, the tattoo that ran around her wrist was completely visible. The marks matched the ones on Gabrielle's own wrist, the sign of a Royal Amazon marriage. The Queen traced along the outline of the pattern on her partner's wrist with her own index finger. "You didn't sleep well," Xena said softly. Gabrielle nodded. "Bad dreams?" The warrior asked. Gabrielle looked up in alarm. "Was I talking in my sleep?" "No, but I heard you cry out." Xena answered. The warrior remembered the last time. Gabrielle let herself become ill, trying to keep the truth of her dreams from Xena. The dark-haired woman moved to kneel in front of Gabrielle, taking both of the young Queen's hands within her own. "Brie, you know that you can tell me anything…even what happens in your dreams. You do know that, right?" Xena reassured. "I know…" Gabrielle answered reluctantly. "I just don't want you becoming ill because you're trying to be strong and bottling it all up. You don't have to be the Queen in front of me, my heart." Xena looked up into pools of forest green. Gabrielle raised a hand and cupped her wife's face within the graceful touch. "You take such good care of me," the young woman said softly. Xena lowered her eyes. "Not good enough," she said in a voice so soft, it was barely a whisper. "Don't!" Gabrielle said sharply. She placed her fingers under Xena's chin
and tilted her face up, drawing the blue gaze to her own. "Don't ever think you're to blame, Xe. I couldn't bear it if I knew you felt that way. Please, my love," Gabrielle pleaded. Xena was somewhat startled at Gabrielle's reaction. She looked in the emerald gaze that stared back at her with a sort of quiet desperation. The warrior formed what she hoped came across as a halfway decent smile. "I'll try as long as you'll do the same," Xena said. Gabrielle conveniently brushed aside the part of the answer that pertained to her. "Try hard, Xe…please?" Xena took the hand that still held her chin and placed a gentle kiss in the palm. "I'd do anything for you, Brie. You know that, don't you?" "Yes…I do," Gabrielle replied in a very small voice. The young Queen only hoped that her wife couldn't hear the strained sadness within her answer. * * *
Xena poured the steaming water from the small metal bucket and the instant the hot water mixed with the hyacinth oil, the whole room filled with the tantalizing floral scent. Gabrielle stepped into the large tub and Xena kneeled down beside the basin. The warrior picked up a sponge and began to wash her wife's back. "Ep brought by a basket of food. She brought some of that sweet cheese you like." Xena said, hoping to entice her wife to eat. "That was thoughtful of her," Gabrielle answered, "but I'm not very hungry right now."
"You need to eat, Brie." Xena said as gently as possible. "I know…you're right. I'll try to eat something when I'm through here." "I'm going to go to the food hut, you need something hot in your stomach. It shouldn't be too hard to get down a bowl of broth and some bread, will it?" "I don't get a choice in this do I?" Gabrielle asked. "Not much of one, no," Xena replied, kissing the young woman's ear. "Then I guess broth sounds fine. Thank you, love." "Do you want help with your hair?" The warrior asked. "No, I can get it, thanks." "Okay," Xena said, rising from the floor. "I'll be back by the time you're done. Anything else sound good to you?" Gabrielle shook her head. Even the thought of eating the broth made her nauseas, but she didn't want to disappoint Xena. "Be back…" Xena kissed the top of her head and left the room. Gabrielle washed her body, wincing as the hand cloth passed over the tender flesh between her legs. She washed and rinsed her hair, then reached for the ivory comb that sat on the rim of the metal tub. Gently running the comb through her long hair to remove the tangles, she realized her hair grew quite a bit in the last season. She needed to get a bit cut off. She hated having to tie her hair back when she practiced with her staff, although she hadn't been out to the practice field in moons. She would never understand how Xena fought with her raven mane whipping around her face. Gabrielle found it most distracting. Her mind wandered around to nearly every inconsequential thought in her head, neatly avoiding the one that caused the most pain. Eventually, there
was no way to avoid it. She leaned an arm against the metal tub's rim and laid her cheek down on her forearm. Xena was being so loving and understanding towards the young Queen. If only she knew what I'd done. I don't think she'd look at me with such compassion if she knew that I'm to blame. As Gabrielle stepped from the tub and dried herself off, she felt only guilt and pain when she thought of her wife taking such good care of her. Each one of Xena's kind words was like a slap to Gabrielle. Each loving look; a bitter strike, this is the way her own guilt pulled at Gabrielle's head. Pulling on her robe, she played with the delicate ring on her finger, the one her father gave her. She thought about it…last night, calling her father and asking the God to intervene on her and Xena's behalf. When she managed to pull herself, screaming, from her nightmare, she asked Xena what Artemis said to her in the temple. Her wife told her of Artemis' inability to heal Brianna, and of Apollo's absence, which the warrior thought odd. Gabrielle thought it odd, too. Apollo acted almost as excited about the baby's first appearance, as Xena and Gabrielle. He is a God, after all.
Wouldn't he know I was in labor…wouldn't he know something went wrong? The young Queen had one hope left and she hung onto it as if it were her lifeline to salvation. Feeling the warm metal of the ring on her finger, Gabrielle opened her mouth to speak, but slowly closed her mouth again. He was a God after all, wasn't he? She thought to herself. Gabrielle knew that her father would have seen exactly what happened, the birth of her child and everything leading up to that moment. She was sure he saw the things she did to put her baby's life in jeopardy, stubbornly refusing to listen to Sartori or Xena. That's why he was noticeably absent. Her father turned his face away from her too. If she would have taken the time to examine the whole situation, to talk with her warrior, or the Healers, who cared so much for their young Queen, she may have learned the truth. Sometimes it's so much easier to believe the
outlandish or the near impossible. When your grief clouds your vision and your judgment, the unfeasible becomes truth and reality. Gabrielle pulled her thoughts away from the ring. She would not beg for anyone's forgiveness. Her crime was too great. She didn't deserve forgiveness. She pulled her robe tighter and walked into the other room. * * *
Gabrielle sat at the table, looking at the unappealing basket of food. She wanted to please Xena by eating something, she just hoped her stomach didn't rebel at the first bit of food she put in it. The door opened and Xena came in, leaving the door slightly ajar. "Hey, you look good," she kissed Gabrielle's cheek. "No dizziness, pain, or anything?" "No, I'm fine." Gabrielle returned. "Brie, I met Ephiny halfway between here and the food hut and she was on her way here with a dinner tray for us. She wanted me to check with you first, whether or not you wanted to see her. She's waiting at the bottom of the steps." Gabrielle thought of the woman who was perhaps her best friend, aside from Xena. Ephiny was not only her Regent, but also the first Amazon that the young Queen ever had the chance to know. Most of her early perceptions about her people were based on Ephiny's teachings. "Of course, Xe, tell her to come in." A moment later, the Regent came through the door carrying a tray of hot food. She placed the tray on the table and Gabrielle stood to greet her friend.
"Please, Gabrielle, don't get up for me." "It's all right, I'm feeling a lot better physically." Gabrielle tried to offer the older woman a smile, but it was a weak attempt. Ephiny came to where Gabrielle stood and she hugged the younger woman, situating a light kiss on her cheek. "Sure you're feeling okay?" She asked warmly. "Yea," Gabrielle answered, her voice breaking a little. "Eph, what…I mean, I've never…I don't know what's expected at the funeral, what Xena and I are supposed to do." Xena stood silently by and Ephiny watched as the warrior clenched her jaw and looked down at the floor. "Gabrielle, don't worry about that, we can go over it later--" "No, now," Gabrielle answered. "Please, can we go over it now?" Ephiny looked confused. She never intended this conversation to be taking place just now. She looked up again and found Xena looking back at her. The warrior nodded her head slightly. "Okay…why don't we sit down?" Ephiny directed them to the table. Xena reached over to hold Gabrielle's hand as it rested on top of the table. The Queen turned sad eyes on her wife and squeezed the hand in response. "Adia and two of the elders are preparing Brianna for her journey to the Amazon Land of the Dead. For two more days, the Princess will go through the purification ceremony. You're both familiar with those rites, correct?" Ephiny looked on as each of the women before her nodded their heads.
"The day after tomorrow, early in the morning, the village will begin to construct the funeral pyre. When…when someone from the Royal family passes over, every person in the village comes by and lays wood on the pyre. Just before sundown, we'll gather. I'll call on one of you," she paused to look between them, "to start the flames." Xena noticed that Gabrielle's hands trembled at the thought of setting her daughter's funeral pyre aflame. The warrior squeezed the hand within her own tighter. "I'll do it," Xena said. Gabrielle lowered her eyes to the table and when she lifted them up again, tears clouded the green gaze. "Go on…" The Queen prompted Ephiny. The Royal Guard will stand watch through the night as the pyre burns down. Princess Brianna's ashes will be sealed in a container and placed in the Temple of Artemis," Ephiny finished. The Regent watched as Gabrielle rose, reached over, and hugged her. "Thanks, Eph. Excuse me, please." Gabrielle said, all but rushing from the room. Both women watched the young Queen hurry from the room. Xena's first instinct was to follow the young woman, to be there for her, but the warrior had to remind herself that Gabrielle needed time to herself too. Just not too much time. "How are you doing?" Ephiny asked the warrior. Xena looked at the Regent and Ephiny knew that stoic, tightly held façade that Xena put on for the world, for everyone but Gabrielle. She could see the warrior pulling back within herself slightly. "Fine…I'm doing fine," she answered. "I really didn't mean to do this now…" Ephiny said, turning to look at the
door Gabrielle rushed through. "She hasn't really…she's still denying it. I mean, she's accepted what's happened, but I think she's denying her feelings. I can't seem to get her to talk about it. She's been having nightmares." Ephiny understood the warrior's fear concerning Gabrielle's nightmares. The Queen and her Consort were to Tartarus and back a few seasons back. After Gabrielle's attack, she spent moons suffering in silence from the violent images that haunted her dreamscape. She knew also that Xena blamed herself for being unable to get Gabrielle to open up to her about the dreams. "It's only been a day, Xena. It may not be the same this time; they may go away of their own accord. We just have to get her talking about it in a way that will be conducive to her healing…a way for both of you to heal." Ephiny pointed out the obvious, but she knew the warrior mentality or mindset. She especially knew Xena and Gabrielle. Xena would walk through fire, denying her own welfare and safety, to care for Gabrielle. Xena was going to argue. She raised her head, prepared to confront the Regent regarding her ability to put aside her own hurt, and why it was more important to take care of Gabrielle. Gabrielle came first. Xena stopped and simply stared at the Amazon, realizing that this was only because Gabrielle came first in her heart. She would do her wife no good if she didn't grieve herself. Now may not be the time, but Xena understood that she couldn't put her emotions about her daughter on hold forever. The warrior lowered her head again, nodding in agreement with Ephiny.
Well, that's different. Xena agreeing? She must be hurting more than even I understand. If Xena is feeling this much pain, I can only think that Gabrielle is absolutely devastated. Ephiny kept her thoughts to herself, but reached out and placed her hand on Xena's arm. "Hey, we're all here for you Xena…for the both of you, please, don't forget
that. You can come and rant at me when you need to, but just remember that you and Gabrielle need to talk to each other too." Xena looked up at the Regent once more and Ephiny couldn't quite place the emotion within the unwavering blue gaze. It was somewhere between sadness and jealousy. "There's a little problem with getting Gabrielle to talk to me," Xena paused, her jaw clenched tighter. "I get the distinct impression that she's deliberately hiding something from me."
CHAPTER 5
XENA OPENED HER eyes, instantly fully awake. That's simply the way her body was. She usually woke slightly before dawn, immediately aware of all her surroundings. She remembered the time, right after she and Gabrielle first became lovers. Xena never could understand, in the seasons they traveled together, why her young lover was so difficult to rouse in the morning. It was as if Gabrielle hadn't any sleep during the night. It shocked, surprised, and flattered the warrior to find that the young woman sat up in the middle of the might, for candlemarks, simply looking down at the beautiful dark-haired woman. * * *
One night, the warrior felt Gabrielle's body, leaning down over her. She
silently opened one eye, surprising the small blonde. "Gabrielle, why are you staring at me when you should be asleep?" "I--I'm not staring!" Gabrielle replied defensively, flopping down onto the bedroll. The bard rolled away from her lover, taking most of the blanket along with her. Xena was awake now and in the mood to tease her new lover. She pressed her long figure to Gabrielle's back, snuggling up against the small blonde. "Hey, you have all the blanket now. I'm cold too," Xena lied. She pressed her body tighter against the young woman, nuzzling her neck and placing small kisses on the smooth skin. "Brie?" "Hhmm?" Gabrielle answered. She was rather enjoying the sensation. "Do you always sit up at night, watching me?" Xena asked the question in a sultry voice, interjecting it at just the right moment. Gabrielle had her eyes closed, neck tilted to one side, and a dreamy expression on her face. Her eyes opened wide when the warrior's words registered. "Oh, you!" The bard brought her elbow back sharply into the warrior's midsection. Xena knew the young woman and braced her abdominal muscles, anticipating the blow. She chuckled as Gabrielle rolled further away. "Brie, I'm sorry…I was just teasing." She lightly touched Gabrielle's shoulder. "I don't know what you want with me anyway. You're the Warrior
Princess…I'm such a nobody," the bard said forlornly. Xena lost the expression of mirth, replacing it with a frown. Realization dawned bright and she pulled the reluctant woman toward her. "Gabrielle, don't you know how beautiful and wonderful you are?" "To you." "To everyone, my heart. Everyone we meet can see the light in your soul, can feel the warmth burning there." Gabrielle finally let herself relax in the warrior's embrace, but to Xena, it felt more like a gesture of defeat. She wrapped her arms tightly around the young woman and kissed the back of her head. "But, you…you're…well, you're you, Xe. People will always wonder what you see in me." "Yes, love, people do know of me, but only you know the real me. I've been across the Known World; my reputation has traveled far and wide. People recognize me the minute I walk into a town. They've seen many of my faces over the seasons and they think they know the me inside this shell, but more often than not, I'm ashamed for the reasons they know me. There is only one thing that I'm proud for people to know about me, my heart." "What's that?" Gabrielle asked. Xena smiled and kissed the mouth that turned toward her. "That I won your heart," the warrior answered. Gabrielle reached up to capture the lips again that, in return, pressed against hers so softly.
"It wasn't much of a contest, Xe," she whispered as they pulled apart. "All you had to do was ask." * * *
As she always did, Xena simply felt Gabrielle's presence. Therefore, when she opened her eyes, she wasn't surprised to see her wife, lying in bed next to her. Gabrielle leaned up on one elbow, looking down on the warrior. Xena noticed that the emerald eyes, which gazed down at her, generally filled with love and adoration, were filled with something more. Clouding those emotions was a look of guilt and sorrow that was new to the warrior. Her wife's face mirrored the grief they both experienced over the last three days. Now, when the warrior looked up, it was as if Xena caught Gabrielle looking down at her with feelings of remorse etched across her face. Xena reached out to pull Gabrielle to her, but instantly felt her wife's hand on her chest, discouraging the ploy. The warrior's questioning expression urged the Queen to quickly explain. "I…um, my chest…it's a bit tender." Xena sat up and with an extremely light touch, cupped her hand around one of her wife's swollen breasts. Her fingers delicately brushed the skin, feeling the hard fullness. Gabrielle winced, even at the gentle touch. "Seems like a lot tender would be a better way to put it," Xena said. "How do they actually feel, besides tender?" Xena asked in concern. "Painful," Gabrielle answered. "They feel strange…full and hard as rocks. This didn't happen with--before." Gabrielle didn't even want to say Hope's name to herself, not now when she was on the verge of some sort of breakdown already. "I'm sorry, Brie, I should have prepared for this the other day, but I think
it's…well, it's from the…the milk you're producing." Xena wasn't shy or embarrassed about the topic, but she hated bringing up one more thing that would remind her wife of their loss. Gabrielle looked across at her wife. She didn't want to let it out, but she couldn't seem to hold back. Silent and unexpected tears tracked their way down the Queen's cheeks. "I'm sorry," she said, wiping the tears away with her hand. "I didn't mean to cry again." "Brie…it's okay," Xena reassured, reaching out her own hand to brush her fingers against the young woman's cheek. "It's something that reminded you of our loss. It's okay to cry about it." Gabrielle nodded her head, too unsure of her voice to speak. Xena sat against the head of the bed and encouraged the young woman to lay with her back against the warrior's chest. Finally settled, Xena said, "I can ask Sartori, I know she has the herbs. I can make a tea and all you have to do is drink a mug in the morning for around seven days or so. It will…it will dry up…" Xena couldn't finish. Gabrielle placed a hand on the warrior's forearm, which was resting across her abdomen. "Not yet, Xe." Xena was thankful that her wife's back was to her, so the Queen couldn't see the expression forming on the warrior's face. It took a few moments until realization broke across the features that were frowning in confusion. At first, Xena couldn't think of a reason or understand why Gabrielle wouldn't want the pain of her current condition removed. Why would she want the reminder…the pain? Understanding flowed through her and the warrior knew that was the reason. The pain was Gabrielle's last reminder that only three days ago, she carried their child. Three days ago, she was looking forward to a future with the life growing inside of her. For nine moons, the young Queen bonded with and grew attached to their child, and
now, all she had to remind her of Brianna's existence was the physical pain. Xena kissed the back of her wife's head and they lay together, no conversation breaking the painful silence that hung between them. The sun was in hiding this morning under the slightly overcast conditions, and now, dark clouds moved into view. They watched through the large window, by the small wooden table, as the gray-black clouds hung low in the sky, the morning light growing dimmer. Normally shuttered during the winter months, a thin gauzy curtain covered the window when the days were so unbearably warm, as they had been recently. It occurred to Xena that they usually kept the curtain drawn until they were awake and about. "Brie, did you open the curtain?" "Yes. I opened it earlier when I had some tea. I was just watching the sun come up." Gabrielle didn't tell her wife that she was thinking, rather forlornly, of her father as she watched dawn break over the Amazon village. "I never even heard you get up," Xena said with a hint of amazement. "You were sound asleep," Gabrielle replied, squeezing the warrior's hand. "You looked like you needed the sleep as much as me." "Couldn't you sleep?" Xena asked. "Something like that." "Dreams again?" Gabrielle nodded and sighed deeply. "Brie, do you remember when you were afraid to tell me your nightmare because you thought it would hurt me?" Xena questioned her wife. She didn't have to say when, they both knew. "Yes," Gabrielle replied.
"My heart, there isn't anything that you can't tell me. I'll understand. You know as well as I that our dreamscapes don't always tell the truth. Sometimes they're just bits and pieces of our own thoughts or guilt." Xena tried to explain as best she could, but she also knew her wife. If Gabrielle was determined that something remain a secret, the warrior could talk until sundown and still never convince the bard to open up. The warrior suspected what her wife's nightmares held. Obviously, they revolved around the sudden death of their child, but Xena knew that she probably factored in there somewhere too. Xena's own guilt over her inability to save Brianna gnawed deeply at the warrior's conscience. She understood Gabrielle's pain. How could her wife keep from blaming her, even unconsciously? She was the Warrior Princess, the woman who conquered death and most of the known Gods. She never accepted defeat, and yet, this time she was beaten. Why this
time, Gabrielle? Xena never blamed Gabrielle for the dreams, not the last time, especially not now. The feelings were real for Gabrielle and the dreamscape is where they made their presence known for the young Queen. Xena simply wished that she could convince her mate that it was a normal response and that it wouldn't hurt the warrior to know of her wife's dreams. "I'll understand whatever you're feeling, Brie. I just wish you'd talk to me. It's been three days, love, and you've hardly eaten a bite. You've already lost all the weight you gained." Xena ran her hand along Gabrielle's belly, noting the flat lines that were so recently hidden by soft flesh. "Yesterday, you worked out with Eponin for nearly half the day. Please, don't bury yourself in that like the last time. I know it helps to be able to focus your mind on something, but don't immerse yourself in being a warrior just to hide from the truth. Please, talk to me, baby," Xena at last pleaded. "Xe…I--" Gabrielle stopped abruptly.
The Queen was about to unburden herself of her terrible secret. Her wife was so loving, willing to do or suffer anything for her. Gabrielle listened as Xena explained, and there was truth to the warrior's words. The last couple of days, Gabrielle felt herself slipping into the same hardened mode she fell into a few seasons previous. Her heart told her that Xena would find a way to forgive the young woman, but Gabrielle's head pulled her in another direction completely.
Not again, not this time, Gabrielle thought to herself. She forgave me the death of her child the first time, how could she ever do it again? How could I stand losing her love? I'll die, I'm sure of it, if I ever have to see her look at me with contempt or hate again. "Xe," Gabrielle whispered in a broken voice. "Not today…maybe..." she sighed heavily, "just not today. Okay?" Xena kissed the young woman's cheek. Today was their daughter's burial rites and she understood Gabrielle's wish to wait. "Of course, my heart. I'm always here for you, Brie, always just a step away." Thunder rumbled from a distance and rolled through the village, the two women feeling the vibration of it, deep within their chests. Shortly after, a light rain followed, and the couple lay in bed, watching it fall. "That seems apt," Gabrielle said softly. Xena nodded her head in complete understanding. Both their hearts mirrored the dark dreariness of this day. They lay in bed, knowing that in a few candlemarks, they would fight their greatest battle yet. Their hearts held pain and regret, sadness and guilt. A plan formulated in the young Queen's brain, just then, the agony of her situation effectively clouding her reason. A way in which she could pay for her own sin, and not have to see Xena look on her with anything but the warrior's customary expression of love and devotion. It would be painful,
but her own suffering would be her penance. She regretted the hurt she would cause her wife, knowing Xena's feelings would still turn to anger and hate, but this way, Gabrielle wouldn't have to see the look in her wife's eyes. The Queen wouldn't have to watch, as her warrior's love grew cold.
CHAPTER 6
GABRIELLE HELPED HER wife fasten the top catch on her tunic. Once the jacket was secure, Xena took a step back, but not before brushing the back of her fingers along Gabrielle's cheek. The Queen gave the warrior a weak smile and Xena returned one of the same. Xena watched as the small blonde turned away to finish dressing herself. The dark-haired woman wore the outfit she used for diplomatic purposes as the Queen's Consort. Black leather trousers, a long sleeved silk shirt that laced up the front and the tight fitting jacket with the Amazon Queen's insignia on the sleeves. Xena felt stiff and uncomfortable in the outfit, but she thought that fitting. She didn't want to wear her customary leathers; she would feel too relaxed in her battle skirt. She didn't want to wear something that would remind her; each time she put it on, of this day. No, better to be ill at ease now, the warrior thought to herself. The two women were preparing for their customary visitation before their daughter's funeral ceremony began. They would have their time alone, then, along with the Queen Regent and several other witnesses, they would watch as the Healers sealed Brianna's body into the tiny sarcophagus the woodworker carved. Crista fashioned the small box. In only two days, the woman completed an ornately decorated cover, in which to send off the little Princess. She carved the Queen's crest into the lid and added small areas of red paint, to
signify royalty. The older woman brought the carved lid by their home the previous day, in order to obtain the Queen's approval. Xena stood, gazing pensively out the window, watching as the light rain fell from the sky. She always loved the rain. She loved the way it made everything smell; the humid, earthy scent that hung heavy in the air. Fresh and clean, the rain always washed away the dust from the roads. Now, Xena feared that, with the coming seasons, she would only remember one thing about the rain…that it fell on the day of her daughter's funeral. She turned her head to watch Gabrielle. The young Queen wore one of her longer leather skirts, belted at the waist with a length of braided, soft leather. The skirt came well past her knees and the top was made of the same soft leather. Xena showed Gabrielle how to cushion her swollen and tender breasts with one of her tighter undergarments, placing soft cloth in the center of the cups of the top. Gabrielle refused the tea the warrior offered to make her, so she had to face, not only the discomfort of her breasts, full and heavy with milk, but a natural side effect of that also. The cloth was to protect her top from the unbidden instances when the droplets of milk would leak from her body and wet her garment. Gabrielle gathered one last item from the room, placing it in a cloth sack and wrapping it up carefully. She paused, and then looked up at her wife. The tall woman crossed the room and opened a chest, lying on the floor. She picked up a small item and tucked it into her tunic. Rising again, Xena retrieved the Queen's cloak from a peg on the wall and held it open for her. "Xe, it's awfully warm for that, it's only a little rain." It was true. Although the rain was providing the precipitation that they desperately needed, it was still extremely warm outside. The rain managed to simply make everything unbearably humid. "I know, love, but you'll get soaked by the time we get back here and I don't want you to catch your--" Xena caught herself. "I just don't want you to get soaked," she added quickly.
Gabrielle knew it was pointless to argue. She simply nodded her head and turned around so her warrior could drape the cloak across her shoulders. She felt the strong arms embrace her from behind and a kiss against the back of her head. She would have liked to turn and sob heavily in the warrior's arms, to just let go and have Xena pet her, kiss her forehead, and whisper reassuringly in her ear. Gabrielle refused to allow herself even this small bit of comfort. She wouldn't allow Xena to use all the warrior's own strength, simply for her. She couldn't allow her wife to take on the burden of carrying Gabrielle. The Queen set her jaw in a show of fierce determination. She would have to show them…everyone…that the Queen could walk down this path herself. * * *
It was difficult for the Queen and her Consort to accept that this small, gauze wrapped package was their daughter. The tiny form lay in the small sarcophagus, which sat upon a low-lying table. The two women sat in silence, one on each side. In truth, Gabrielle, admittedly a woman of words, found that she had none. Not any that made sense, anyway, and she needed to make sense of this. Gods, maybe I am becoming too much the warrior. She realized this was how Xena got through. Trying to sort events, especially the tragic ones, and placing them in an appropriate place, just waiting for the day when you would have time to examine them closer. Only, that day never comes, but the hope is that enough times passes and makes the happening easier to bear. Suddenly she found herself thinking of Crista, the wood carver who fashioned Brianna's sarcophagus. Gabrielle tried to follow her train of thought backward, wondering what prompted her to think of the woman. It was because she was remembering when she and Xena walked through the village, on their way here, to this small hut set apart from all the others
of the village. Gabrielle remembered thinking that to most of the Amazon village, this was just another day in their lives. They probably had no idea at the depth of the pain she and her wife were enduring. They would be sad, and respectful, and some would shed tears, but they wouldn't feel as she and Xena felt. They wouldn't sense that their whole world just became devoid of pleasure or happiness. No one would feel that…but Crista would. Last season, the woman lost her only child. Gabrielle presided over the burial rites, in a somewhat less formal situation than today. The Queen truly thought, on that day, that she was feeling the woman's sadness as her own. Now, having encountered the sorrow and the loss, Gabrielle realized that she felt nothing of what the woman was experiencing on that day. The Queen looked over and slipped her hand within her Consort's, which lay resting atop the casket. Without looking over at her, Xena squeezed the small hand reassuringly. The thumb of the larger hand stroked the trembling fingers, as the two women silently shared the immense burden of their anguish. Gabrielle knew, the women whose eyes followed them through the village today, could not truly understand what she an Xena were feeling. She merely hoped and prayed that none of them would ever discover it first hand. Sartori's hands came to rest, first on one of Xena's shoulders, then on Gabrielle's shoulder. The Healer could think of no appropriate words. Saying, ‘it was time,' seemed so harsh and final for the two women who most certainly suffered their fair share of trials in their young lives. "Would you like a little more time…to offer your gifts?" Sartori asked. Both women nodded and the Healer moved to a corner of the small hut where her own wife stood. Adia, the taller of the two, wrapped an arm around the smaller woman's shoulder, Sartori's arm slipping around the tall Healer's waist without much conscious thought.
Xena looked over at Gabrielle for a few long moments, trying to decipher the expression on the young Queen's face, wondering if her thoughts took the same meandering paths as the warrior's did for the last candlemark. The dark-haired woman lifted the small hand, cradled gently in her own, to her lips, placing a light kiss on it. Gabrielle looked across at her wife, noting the dark circles under the warrior's eyes. The skin that was usually a dark bronze from the sun, uncharacteristically pale. The blonde understood the unspoken question the blue eyes posed. Gabrielle reluctantly nodded her head in response. Both of them rose at once, each appearing somewhat unwilling to release the other's hand. When at last they broke apart, Xena stood and waited as Gabrielle bent to retrieve the small sack she carried from their home. Pulling the object from its covering, Gabrielle paused, understanding that this gesture was a release of sorts. She hesitated because she really wasn't sure if she was ready to let go. Knowing she had no other option, the Queen pulled the object completely free of its wrapping to reveal an Amazon Mask. Amazon tradition required the reigning Queen to create the mask for her future heir. Gabrielle spent many painstaking hours creating just the right combination of paint, feathers, beads, and carvings. The final product was an impressive mask, one in which the small blonde hoped conveyed just the right amount of ceremony, tradition, and intimidation. Gabrielle looked at the mask as she held it in both her hands. The young Queen's face was unreadable, even to her lover. At last, Gabrielle gently placed the mask inside the sarcophagus, beside her lifeless infant. As Gabrielle withdrew a step from the casket, Xena unfastened one of the middle catches on her tunic and reached into the open jacket. She pulled a small object out. It was a shock of sweet lemongrass, braided, and then fastened into a loop. Every inch or so, along the length of the braid, was a decorative knot.
Cyrene showed the warrior how to fashion the complicated knot pattern. The older woman explained to her daughter that when Xena was an infant, Cyrene fashioned the braided grass, just as her own mother showed her. According to Xena's grandmother, the object was a teething ring. The circular shape gave the infant's hand something to easily grasp, the anesthetic properties of the lemongrass eased the baby's teething discomfort, and the knotted areas were a symbol of a mother's love. Those decorative knots began with an intricate series of over and under moves. The result was a tight loop in the shape of a heart. The warrior hunched over her child's casket, the carefully constructed gift in her hand, fingering each knot in turn. Usually, Amazon tradition allowed for the family to send their loved one off with one gift from each of them, something of special meaning to the deceased. It was believed, that when the departed began their journey to the Amazon Land of the Dead, special memories from the gifts surrounding them would guarantee that the love of family would never be forgotten…even in death. The warrior returned to her standing position after having laid the small gift beside her daughter's body. She stepped back beside her wife and the two women watched as the ceremony was performed to seal the royal casket. Xena and Gabrielle stood side by side, the length of their arms touching the entire time. Some would be surprised that the Queen and her Consort were not sharing an embrace or clasping hands tightly, during this heart-wrenching scene. Those onlookers would be mistaken, however, if they thought the two women stood separate in their pain, for not a moment passed when they weren't in physical contact some way. The connection they shared, in their grief, was very nearly psychic. No words needed to be spoken or sentiments shared between them. This was a bond created by pain, and shared on this level between only these two. Four Royal Guard surrounded the sarcophagus, waiting patiently, for Xena to escort the Queen to the area of the funeral pyre. The Queen and the warrior exchanged a brief glance; unshed tears held in check by both women. Gabrielle turned, and in a slow deliberate motion, crossed the small room, pausing at the open door.
The young woman experienced a sudden attack of dizziness, fighting a wave of nausea back with deep breaths. Xena moved quickly when she saw Gabrielle clutch at the doorpost, her nails digging into the soft wood. The warrior watched, as the Queen's mask nearly fell from her grasp. Gabrielle leaned her body back against the tower of warm strength behind her. Xena's body pressed up against the Queen's back, the warrior's hands gently holding the young woman steady. The episode of lightheadedness passed and Gabrielle sighed heavily, as if there were no strength left in her body. "Easy, my heart…breathe," Xena whispered. "Okay?" The tall woman pressed her lips against the back of her wife's head and felt the motion of Gabrielle slightly nodding.
What would I do without her, Gabrielle thought to herself. No…what will I do without her. Gabrielle took a small step forward, breaking away from the comforting embrace of her wife. She raised the Queen's mask in both hands and, taking one last, deep breath, she placed the mask across her face. She felt an odd comfort from the act. She felt as if she were not only hiding her face away, but her heart, as well. This…this would make it bearable, her mind comforted. The wall that could be slipped around one's emotions, the wall that warriors were so famous for, that her own warrior spent seasons trying to overcome. This was Gabrielle's salvation and she wondered why such a thing as a warrior's trick should come so easily to her now. Xena took her position beside Gabrielle, sparing a fleeting moment to glance down at the small woman, before she slipped on the mask. The thought that stuck in the warrior's mind was how familiar the look of emptiness and grim determination looked on her lover's face. Familiar expressions, but out of place on her wife. What the warrior really thought, as she felt Gabrielle move beside her toward the pyre, was how much Gabrielle looked like her. The ache in her heart was caused by the knowledge that when they stepped from the small hut, Xena no longer saw the sweet bard of Potidaea, only the Queen of the Amazons.
The Guard followed half a dozen paces behind the Queen and her Consort. Xena was glad she made her wife wear the cloak, as the rain fell lightly, but steadily. The young Queen could barely see the rain, let alone feel it. Nearly in front of the large pyre, Gabrielle unconsciously reached out for Xena's hand, the warrior sensing the contact before it arrived. They walked the rest of the way like that, stony expressions masking their true emotions. Forced to control their display of grief because of who they were, what they represented. For this small space in time, they were not allowed to be two women enduring perhaps the most difficult day of their lives. They existed as rulers and leaders within this community, and because of this, their lives were not fully their own. The Guard slid the sarcophagus onto the platform above the wood that the village carefully situated for the fire. The funeral rites began, chanting and songs, some in a language Xena didn't understand, but that she had only heard before. It's happening so quickly was Xena's first thought. At the same time, the warrior felt the day would take an eternity to end. The warrior disappeared into herself, the only connection to the physical world was the small hand that trembled in hers. Xena looked next to her, blocking out the happenings around her, she watched the young Queen by her side. Gabrielle stared straight ahead, her body tight as a bowstring, but trembling all over at the same time. The fearsome mask covered the Queen's beautiful face, hiding Gabrielle's usually expressive visage. She could have been carved in stone, but for the tears Xena saw slide out from under the mask. The warrior no longer held back her own tears as they mixed with the rain that wet her face. She watched as two of the Guards poured a thick black substance out onto the base of the pyre. All along the wood, they poured the viscous liquid from the hollowed out gourds used as containers. The rain made the wood wet and so; Greek Fire seemed to be the answer to give the damp logs a chance to catch and burn.
Even behind the Queen's mask, Gabrielle appeared stunned that they had been standing there for nearly a candlemark. Two of the Royal Guard broke their stiff formation, one carrying a large brass bowl, filled with hot coals, the other a long bow with one arrow. The coals were placed at Gabrielle's feet and the Guard knelt before the Queen, offering up the bow and arrow. Gabrielle didn't move, she simply stared down at the bow as if she didn't know what to do. Xena cursed herself for the hundredth time. The pyre was to be lit by either she or Gabrielle. Xena agreed to do it when Ephiny first explained the Royal funeral rites to them. The warrior didn't want her wife to have to experience one more brand of pain. Gabrielle argued with her all last evening, becoming upset and breaking into tears. She was so adamant about being the one to light the pyre that Xena agreed, simply to calm her wife down. Now, watching Gabrielle struggle with the burden, Xena had to clench her fists to keep from stepping in. Gabrielle realized that she was the one they were waiting for. Her mind went completely blank. The only thing she was aware of was the sharp hissing noise the raindrops made as the splashed into the bucket of hot coals. She watched as her own hands reached out for the offered bow, seeming as if they belonged to someone else's body and not her own. Gazing at the trembling fingers as they wrapped themselves around the unfamiliar weapon, she felt as if she were watching herself from far off, not even feeling she was really in her own body. It was a matter of memory, the limited lessons that Eponin taught her on how to use the bow, that Gabrielle fell back on now. The head of the arrow was wrapped in gauze and dipped in Greek Fire. The Queen notched the arrow, standing still for the longest time. Ephiny looked over and searched for some sign that Gabrielle would be unable to continue. The Regent was comforted by the fact that Xena edged herself closer to her wife, noticing Gabrielle's erratic behavior. Gabrielle took a deep breath, the first one having caught it her throat. Her limbs felt frozen, too heavy to lift. With what the Queen thought of as a massive effort, she bent and slowly let the coals spark the arrow into flame.
Her warrior watched the slow movements, understanding the hesitation in her wife's momentum. Once the arrow flew, it would be over. There would be no redemption from the Gods, nothing Xena could do to save the day. The Queen brought the bow up and drew back the string. The flame from the arrow felt hot against her hand as she pulled the bowstring back farther, then Gabrielle froze. She could neither continue, nor go back, and so she froze in place. Xena watched on as Gabrielle's motion stopped. It was longer than necessary and the warrior wasn't sure how long she should wait before stepping in. Finally, Gabrielle's arms began to shake with the effort at holding back the taut bowstring. Xena was so close; all she had to do was grasp the bow in her left hand, covering Gabrielle's small hand. The warrior reached her right arm around the Queen and plucked the bowstring from Gabrielle's shaky fingers. "We can do this, Brie," Xena's low voice whispered in the blonde's ear. Gabrielle nodded, unable to speak, and let the warrior's strength flow into her. Together, the Queen and her Consort let fly the arrow. The flaming projectile imbedded itself into a large log at the base of the pyre and the fire spread quickly until it was a roaring blaze. The singing and chanting continued around the two women, but they were as oblivious to that as to the rain that fell steadily from the sky. Gabrielle felt limp and never resisted when Xena turned the small woman in her arms and they stood there, the Amazon Queen wrapped in the warrior's embrace. Her mask pressed against her face as Gabrielle rested her head on her wife's chest. They stood like this for some time, two, then three candlemarks having gone by before Ephiny could convince Xena that the only way Gabrielle would go inside, would be if the warrior led the way. Xena once again cursed her own foolishness at risking Gabrielle's health. The warrior eventually led the young Queen from their place in front of the still blazing fire, back to their home. Ephiny watched the Royal couple walk away and prayed to Artemis that
she would intervene at some point. There were some things that people came back from, even Xena and Gabrielle, but this one would be a test of epic proportions. The Regent knew other couples whose love for one another grew cold over their inability to cope with the death of a child. She hoped and prayed that the Queen and her Consort were prepared for the battle ahead. * * *
"Noooooo…" Gabrielle's scream broke through the stillness of the early morning once more. Xena quickly wrapped her own body around the small one wrapped into a fetal position beside her. "Sshh…baby, I've got you. It's okay…" the warrior murmured to the exhausted young woman. Xena felt Gabrielle's body eventually go still again, deep, even breaths coming from the sleeping Queen. Even though the warrior's sleep was fitful, she at least slept. Gabrielle spent the previous night and day passing between sleep and her nightmare-laden dreamscape. After the exhausting funeral yesterday, Xena tried to allow Gabrielle time to rest today, but the dreamscape images that haunted her bard, simply became stronger. Having finally slept for a few uninterrupted candlemarks, Gabrielle rose to find the day sunny and warm, as if yesterday's rain had never been. Xena walked into the house, dirt, and sweat plastered to the warrior's skin. She carried a tray of food and Gabrielle couldn't help but notice her wife and the friend who tagged behind the tall warrior. Gabrielle envied the look of peace on her wife's face, brought about, no doubt, by a strenuous workout on the practice field. Xena told her on more than one occasion that was the way warriors worked things out.
She's working it out…why can't I? Well, that's easy…she wasn't responsible for her child's death. Gabrielle felt sleepy, battered, and beyond weary, but the expression on Eponin's face caused the young Queen to make the attempt at a smile. Eponin timidly followed Xena into the house. Seeing Gabrielle bathed and dressed was a relief to Xena. The young woman looked a little battleweary, but at least functional. The warrior didn't like the dark circles that hung under the bard's eyes, which grew darker every day. Her wife's weight did not escape the warrior's scrutiny either. In four days, Gabrielle managed to lose a considerable amount of body mass. Yes, Xena admitted, a great deal was due to the birth, but her wife wasn't eating, and that worried the warrior as much as the constant nightmares that plagued the young Queen. "Gabrielle?" Eponin asked quietly. The small blonde met the warrior halfway across the room to accept a hug. Eponin gingerly placed her arms around the young woman, using as gentle a touch as she could. "It's okay, Ep," Gabrielle said, pulling out of the embrace. "I won't break." The Amazon smiled back and let out a short sigh of relief. Eponin wasn't used to dealing with these kinds of situations and it broke her heart that it was happening to two of her closest friends. "I didn't know what to say…yesterday…" "It's okay…I understand," Gabrielle mustered up another smile that tugged painfully at her friend's heart. "But, I'm not that fragile…you're not going to crush me or anything with a hug." Gabrielle tried to tease the serious warrior and received that relieved expression once again. "I'm not so sure." Eponin grinned. "When's the last time this woman fed you?" the Amazon jerked a thumb in Xena's direction.
The Queen and her Consort exchanged a hurried glance that spoke volumes to the Amazon. "Well, I've been here all of two heartbeats and I've already put my foot in it, haven't I?" Eponin muttered. The warrior could have kicked herself, realizing that Gabrielle probably had no stomach for food, and that it was certainly already an issue between her two friends. "Hey, no big deal," Xena said, coming forward to slap the Amazon on the back. The tall warrior slipped an arm around her wife's shoulders and gave her a tender kiss. "We were just going to sit down for a bite, right Brie?" Xena indicated the tray of food on the table. Gabrielle nodded. Her wife stepped in just in time to save everyone from embarrassment. "There's plenty, Ep," Gabrielle looked at the large wooden platter of food. "Why don't you join us?" Xena was surprised at the request for company her wife made. She took it as a good sign, however, and nodded her head up and down at the Amazon standing in front of her. "Sure, if you really want me to," Eponin replied. It took about a quarter of a candlemark before the Amazon warrior felt comfortable again in front of her old friends. Eponin figured it was a warrior thing, the ability she and Xena had to slip right back into their easy friendship. Xena didn't talk about anything touchy–feely and Eponin tried to veer as far away from any sensitive type moments as she could. It was the perfect solution. Gabrielle was a different story. The Amazon felt like she was walking on eggshells with her Queen. Gabrielle had a sensitive nature and Eponin felt as if she was sure to say the wrong thing. If Gabrielle cried, Ep didn't know what she'd do, well, after she got up off the floor, because she was certain that's where the Warrior Princess would put the Amazon if she did make the small blonde cry.
Gabrielle tried to keep up her end of the conversation, but she was failing miserably and she knew it. She just didn't feel like talking. She didn't want to see anyone or be with anyone. It was almost like a hollow spot, the space within her soul that knew love and compassion. It was once filled, but now all she could sense was this emptiness there and no matter how hard she tried to pull herself out of this funk, she couldn't get past it. She was reminded of a deep, dark pit. She kept trying to climb up the sides, little by little finding some purchase, but all of a sudden, for no reason at all, the walls would crumble within her grasp, and she would slip back into the darkness once again. She would try again, but Gabrielle knew that if she didn't make it out soon, she might eventually lack the strength to try anymore. The young Queen couldn't hide her lack of appetite from her wife or the Amazon warrior who shared their meal. Gabrielle made a good show regarding the food on her plate, but all she was really doing was moving it around from place to place. The two warriors eventually ate their fill, but neither mentioned the fact that Gabrielle consumed a total of one piece of cheese; unless you counted the small piece of flatbread, she nibbled on throughout the meal. "You two look as though you had quite a workout," Gabrielle mentioned. "Yep," the Amazon replied. "There's nothin' like taking on a class full of zealous students, to get your mind in focus." "Does it help you like that, Xe?" Gabrielle asked Xena with curiosity. "Yea, I guess it helps…some." Xena answered. Her wife caught her off guard with that one. It wasn't like Gabrielle to question the ways of a warrior. "Then maybe I should head out to the practice field." The young Queen answered. "That's a great idea, Gabrielle. Get a good workout and you'll have that appetite back in no time!" Eponin responded, perhaps a little too
enthusiastically. Xena just stared at the small blonde for a moment or two. The silence became slightly uncomfortable and the Amazon suddenly understood that she might have overstepped her bounds. "Of course, you want to take it easy…you know, just…um…well, uh slow, yea, slow to start…" Xena could only stare at her wife. She recognized that look within Gabrielle's green gaze; the warrior had seen it before. Gabrielle was struggling with something from within, something that went far deeper than the loss of their child. She gave the impression of a woman who was trying to keep herself afloat in a sea of insanity. Her bard was grasping, reaching out to try to find something to hold onto. How can I deny her anything that
might help bring her back to me? "You don't want to overdo it," Xena said, reaching over to place her hand upon Gabrielle's forearm. "You know, make sure you stretch and loosen up some of those tight areas before getting into anything." Gabrielle heard the reluctance in her wife's voice, but she also heard the tender concern, and that pained her. I'm hurting her more everyday and I
can't seem to stop myself. Oh, Xe, why can't you be harsh or angry with me…at least make this easier for me to bear? "Yea, well…um, lunch was great guys…so, maybe I'll see you on the practice field, Gabrielle," Eponin said, rising from her seat. She watched as Xena raised an eyebrow in her direction and quickly added, "or not… you know, whatever…" "I think you scared her," Gabrielle said to her own warrior once Eponin closed the door. "Sorry…I didn't mean anything by it," Xena responded, a contrite expression on her face. "Brie, if you want to get your mind off things and get in shape, I think it's great that you want to get out on the practice field,
but I don't want to have to worry about you the whole time." "Meaning?" "Meaning that you are losing too much weight, you're hardly sleeping a full candlemark the entire night, and you're not eating enough to keep a bird alive. If you start overexerting yourself, I'm afraid you might become ill, or worse, hurt yourself. Suffering from sleep deprivation and malnutrition are hardly conducive to safe weaponry practice." Xena took a deep breath, just this moment realizing she'd risen and begun to pace the floor. She circled around, having no recollection of getting this far. She turned around to face her wife, just in time to see Gabrielle approaching, a small smile on the young woman's face. "What?" the warrior asked a little defensively. Gabrielle reached the tall woman and slipped her arms around the warrior's waist. "Thanks for always worrying about me." "You mean, you're not going to yell at me and tell me you're a grown woman, and can make your own decisions?" "Would it stop you from worrying?" Gabrielle asked. "No." "That's what I thought," the Queen responded. The two met in a gentle kiss, her wife's sweet touch lighting a fire within her, as always. Xena responded to the kiss by pressing her mouth harder, pulling her wife's body against her and enjoying the feel. Gabrielle was the first to pull away, pressing her hand to the warrior's chest. "Hey," Gabrielle whispered. "I better get out to the practice field while it's still daylight. Xena reached down to nuzzle the Queen's neck, placing soft kisses on the
skin there. "You could postpone that workout. Or, I could give you a private workout," Xena whispered seductively. Gabrielle pushed herself further away from the warrior, but not before she caught the wounded expression on Xena's face. "How long were you out on the practice field?" Gabrielle asked, trying to change the subject. "Huh? A couple candlemarks, I guess. Why?" "You need a bath, warrior," the Queen answered with a grin. "You could help…" the warrior offered. Gabrielle broke completely free of the taller woman's embrace and tried to make it sound as if she were teasing. How could she explain to Xena that she simply had no desire…even for her wife? "I better go or I'll never get in that workout," Gabrielle answered. Before Xena knew it, she was standing in the room alone. The warrior wondered how one minute she could feel like whisking her wife off to bed, then the next moment be standing there, feeling rather abandoned.
Hades! Gods woman, that was pushing…no wonder she ran off. You're pushing too hard, warrior; give her a chance. Xena wanted to make love to her wife, but it wasn't out of random lust. She wanted to be with Gabrielle, and no other, simply out of love. She felt like being close to the small woman, feeling that bond…their lovemaking always brought about. The only problem was that the feeling she received from her wife, didn't appear to be mutual. Gabrielle…pushing me away? Gods, I have to give
her some more time. You thick headed, warrior! Xena crossed to the window and watched as her wife walked with her staff,
toward the end of the village. "You take all the time you need, Brie," Xena whispered aloud. "I'll be here when you find your way back."
CHAPTER 7
"ANYONE HOME?" "Xena," Adia welcomed the tall warrior into the home she shared with her mate, Sartori. "Of course, come in." The tall blonde rose, dusting her hands of powdered herbs, and then clasped the warrior's forearm in greeting. A number of sacks and wooden bowls were scattered atop a small wooden table and Adia pulled over another chair, indicating it to Xena. "Please, sit." "I didn't mean to interrupt…if you're busy…" Xena let the statement trail off. "No, no, come on, sit down," the Healer pushed aside some of the bowls. Xena sat down in the chair and the worried expression on her face told Adia that this wasn't merely a social call. Besides, the warrior wasn't exactly the type for chatty visits over nothing. Just then, the door to the bedroom opened and Sartori appeared in the doorway. "Xena, how wonderful to see you," the small Healer welcomed. "I was just going to make some tea, won't you join us?"
"Um…well, actually…I kind of wanted to…well, to talk to Adia," Xena responded hesitantly. Sartori was a smart woman and considering her wife's area of Healing, whenever they had visitors that asked for her mate, Sartori made herself scarce. "Of course. Well, how about a cup of tea anyway? I have a patient to see in the infirmary, so I can get out of your hair for a while." Before the warrior knew it, she was sipping on a soothing mug of raspberry mint tea as the small Healer gave her wife a kiss on the cheek before heading out the door. "I won't be long." Xena said, half rising from her seat. "Nonsense, I'll be busy for candlemarks. Take all the time you need." Sartori gave the warrior's arm a squeeze on her way out and Xena responded with a grateful smile. Xena gazed around the room, then at the floor, seemingly unable to start the conversation, now that she was sitting here in front of the Healer. Adia recognized the reticence, having seen it in many patients, especially warriors. There were some who always found it more difficult than others to ask for the help they desired. "How about grabbing a bowl and helping?" Adia asked her friend, hoping that the act of sorting through herbs might calm Xena's mind. In truth, Xena was one of the few, actually, she was the only person Adia ever let see the herbs she used for her dreamscape healings. Xena knew nearly as much as the Healer about the medicines used in the procedures, so there was no fear the knowledge would be abused. The two women sat there in silence, sipping on mugs of tea and stripping the tiny dried leaves off the stiff green branches. Adia was patient; her understanding of her friend's ways went deeper than even Xena
understood. She allowed the comfortable silence to continue, not feeling the need to fill it up with mindless chatter. Eventually, Xena's mind sorted through her thoughts and she began to speak. "Do you remember when you helped Gabrielle and I to heal her dreamscape?" Xena asked the Healer. Adia nodded. "Yes, yes, I do." It wasn't something she would easily forget, knowing the two women loved and cared for one another so much, yet having to hold back from telling each of them how the other felt. Her job as a Healer had often put her into that position, a reason why she and her wife were so well trusted. The two Healers knew virtually every secret, of every Amazon in the village, but they were very closed mouth about their patient's private lives. Everyone was entitled to privacy, even in such a small village. "She's having nightmares…I mean, not just regular bad dreams," Xena was quick to interject. "She's having some kind of hellish dreams. She wakes up screaming, crying, she pleads for forgiveness in her sleep, but when I try to get her to tell me about them, she starts crying, saying she can't. Not that she doesn't remember, or anything like that, but she says she can't." Xena paused and tossed the stripped branch into a basket on the floor. "You should hear her, Adia, begging in her dreams. She sounds so frightened, terrified of not being forgiven. It's so hard to listen to," Xena finished. "Xena, you know I'd do anything to help Gabrielle, but she has to want the help. I'm curious as to why she didn't come to me and ask herself. She's never been afraid to talk to me." "I know it sounds like I'm making more out of this than there may be, but I have the strangest feeling that she doesn't feel like she deserves forgiveness for whatever she thinks she's done. I even thought maybe…" Xena stopped abruptly and tears welled up in her eyes. "I thought maybe
she blamed me in her dreams again…you know, in a way she can't control," she hastily added. "Maybe that's why she feels guilty…for blaming me." "Xena, do you think Gabrielle holds you responsible in some way for your daughter's death?" Adia asked in confusion. "I don't know!" the warrior jumped up. Xena began to pace the floor and the Healer realized that she was one of the few who would ever see the Warrior Princess this way, the warrior wringing her hands in frustration. Xena's heart, her entire world, was so focused on Gabrielle that the Healer didn't even want to think what would become of Xena, should any harm ever befall the Queen. "I only know that she's pulling away. Not just from me," Xena lifted concerned blue eyes to the Healer, "but from life. When Gabrielle suffers heartbreak, she writes or buries herself in something to get her focus back. Do you know where she is right now?" Adia silently shook her head back and forth. "She's down on the practice field with her staff." Xena responded. The Healer raised her eyebrows slightly. "Well, I admit, that is rather uncharacteristic of Gabrielle," Adia muttered, almost to herself. "It's what I do, Adia," Xena said in exasperation. "I do it because at one time I didn't know any better. Because I had no idea, what it meant to be in touch with my feelings or my emotions. They were foreign to me. Most of all, I still do it because there are days when I look into my own heart and what I see there, what I've done in my past, still terrifies me. What I want to know is, why is my wife feeling that way? How could someone so full of compassion and light, be afraid to confront their feelings?" The warrior's passionate plea struck right at the Healer's heart. She'd heard of the things that lay in Xena's past and she knew that the stories she'd heard were probably only the things people would dare speak. She
cringed to think of the atrocities that people were too afraid to mention regarding the woman before her. If anyone understood or recognized the concept of being too afraid to deal with something from the past, it was Xena. "How about if I talk to Gabrielle? Let me see if I can't encourage her to enter the dreamscape with you?" Adia said. Relief flowed across Xena's face and the look on the warrior's face told Adia that if the dark-haired woman hadn't thanked the Healer so quickly, and nearly rushed from the room, Xena would have broken down in tears. The tall Healer stood in the middle of the room; hands on her hips, trying to decide the best way to handle someone like Gabrielle. Unsure of her Queen's frame of mind, Adia was sure of one thing, however. She walked into the bedroom and retrieved a long staff from one corner, then opened the large chest at the end of the bed. It was quite a long time ago when she last used them, but when she unwrapped the soft leather, they looked the same as when they were first forged. She tested their weight, one in each hand, grinning and flipping them easily, then sliding them, one into each boot. Adia left the hut, headed for the practice field. The Healer knew what it was like to feel rage, pain, and hurt. Because of her nature, and her gift, the accepted outlet had always been compassion, to help and heal. There was a time, though, when she couldn't find her way to feel those emotions. She could barely sustain them for another, let alone herself. She needed a way to sort through the mess her life was in, a way to create order from chaos. She needed a path to follow; perhaps it was just a way to channel all that anger. Even though the rage was what she leveled at herself out of her own guilt. Adia hummed a tune she remembered from those days. She paused when she neared the practice field. Closing her eyes, hearing the shouts and cries of women sparring, and hearing the sounds of their weapons striking against one another, it all combined to bring the Healer back to another time. Some decent memories, but most…ones she would rather not relive.
* * *
"It's been an honor, my Queen." The young woman said, bowing stiffly to Gabrielle. Gabrielle smiled up at the fifteen-summers-old warrior, who was already taller than she was. The smile was genuine and not forced, that felt good. This was the first time in nearly two candlemarks that the small blonde thought about herself, her pain…her guilt. When she was fighting, there was no thinking, only doing. She acted on instinct and learned skills, her world revolving on only the amount of space between herself and her opponent. Eponin very gently cuffed her student in the back of the head. "Honor? You let a woman half your size kick the crap out of you!" Gabrielle smiled again. She remembered her friend's manner of teaching, reminiscing back to the days when Eponin and Ephiny first taught her to use a staff. They treated her like the novice she was and she became a better student because of it. "Well, yes I did, Weapons Master, but…well, she is the wife of the Warrior Princess, after all." The young warrior grinned. Eponin looked at Gabrielle, giving her a wink, then turned back to glare at her student. "Oh, I see. So, you were…shall we say, holding back some, out of courtesy, of course." "Yea, that's it," the youth said, lowering her voice in case her Queen should be listening. "I mean…she is our Queen and I wouldn't want to--" "Hurt her," Eponin finished for the girl. "Yea, that's it."
"I see," Eponin drawled, watching as Gabrielle walked up behind the young student. "Well," she turned the girl and enjoyed the expression, a combination of embarrassment and fear, which came across the girl's face. "I'm sure since your Queen knows how you feel now, she wouldn't dream of making you hold back. As a matter of fact, I bet she'll try twice as hard this time…just for you." The young woman swallowed the lump that suddenly formed in her throat, causing an audible sound heard throughout the camp. Suddenly her classmates, catching on to the ruse, started laughing at their comrade. Seeing that her bragging had undone her, the young warrior bowed deeply to the Queen. "My apologies, your highness," she said with a disarming smile. "Go on…get out of here!" Eponin barked, trying to keep the look of amusement off her own face. Once they stood alone, Eponin turned to Gabrielle, noticing the Queen still breathing rather heavily. "I guess it'll take more than one day to get into shape," Gabrielle commented. "You need more than practice to get in shape," the Amazon said under her breath. "What's that supposed to mean?" "It means that you need to eat, sleep, and practice to be a healthy warrior, Gabrielle." Eponin didn't want to come down on her friend so soon after the tragedy in Gabrielle's life, but this was the only way she knew to be. "Ep, I am not a warrior," Gabrielle replied. "Could have fooled me."
Gabrielle smiled slightly. "Yea, I guess I did kick a few butts out here today." "Perhaps that's because you haven't been fighting anyone your own size," a voice commented from behind the Queen. Gabrielle turned and the exclamation of surprise written on her face was quite evident. The Queen looked at the tall woman who, in Gabrielle's mind up to this point, was a peace-loving Healer. Adia stood as tall as Xena, looking more the part of a warrior than any healer did. The Amazon casually leaned on a staff that appeared to be a bit longer than Gabrielle's stave, plus, she had two weapons peeking out of the top cuff of each of her leather boots. "Adia, I've been using this thing quite a long time," Gabrielle said to her friend, unsure of how to dissuade the tall woman from the sparring match she seemed intent on having. "Well, then a warrior of your skill won't have any trouble holding back if it should become necessary," Adia drawled with confidence. The comment got under her skin just a tiny bit. Something about the Healer's mild arrogance reminded Gabrielle of her wife. "I'm not a warrior," Gabrielle added flatly. "Gabrielle," Adia smiled in a friendly manner. "You've lived enough of life to know that things aren't always as they appear. The same holds true for people." "So, you've used the staff before?" Gabrielle asked in surprise. "Like you, My Queen, I have found that occasionally peace works best when it comes at the end of a very large stick." Adia twirled the stave expertly, to seemingly prove her skill. "All right…" Gabrielle smiled. Adia tried to appear unaffected by that smile, but it seemed awfully close
to the one Xena got, just before she laid someone out with one blow. "Step into the ring, you who are so much more than a Healer," Gabrielle finished. Adia stepped forward and bowed slightly, never taking her eyes off the smaller woman. "I am honored, you who are so much more than a bard." * * *
Gabrielle was breathing through her mouth, but Adia didn't seem to be in much better shape herself.
Gods, this girl is good! Adia thought to herself, narrowly avoiding having her legs swept from underneath her.
Hades! Where does a Healer learn to fight like this, Gabrielle thought, going on the defensive once more. In two quick moves, Gabrielle managed to put the Healer on her back, the staff flying from her grip. The Queen moved her stave in to her opponent's throat, to command the victory, but Adia pulled what looked like a cross between a short sword and a dagger from each boot and succeeded in blocking Gabrielle's staff away from her prone body. The match was on once more as Adia continually fought off Gabrielle's attacks with nothing more than the oddly shaped handles of the weapons, which looked like curved prongs. The Healer blocked, parried, and even managed to hook Gabrielle's leg, flipping the small woman to the ground. Gabrielle rolled and brought herself up quickly, more than surprising the stunned Healer. That was all the advantage Gabrielle needed. A swing right, then left, dealt a stinging blow to both of the Healer's hands, causing
Adia's weapons to go flying. Adia was certain that Gabrielle saw she had disable the Healer, but Gabrielle didn't seem to realize that fact. Either that or she didn't want to recognize it. The end of the Queen's staff ended up coming across and Gabrielle brought the powerful strike up into the Healer's ribcage. It wasn't until Adia was on her knees, gasping for air, that Eponin's shouts got through to the young Queen. "Oh, Gods!" Gabrielle exclaimed, dropping her staff and rushing over to the fallen woman. "Okay," Adia croaked. "I'm okay." Gabrielle helped the Healer to her feet, apologizing repeatedly. "Gabrielle, it's okay," Adia said, lowering herself to sit upon one of the low benches that were situated around the field. "No need to apologize, you didn't mean to do it." Adia looked up into Gabrielle's silent face. "That is unless you did mean to do it," she added softly. Gabrielle and the Healer simply stared at one another knowingly. Suddenly Eponin felt as if she were intruding. "Uh, I guess if you two are through beating on each other…um, I'm gonna take off." Gabrielle acknowledged the warrior with a nod, never taking her eyes from the seated woman. "Sit down before you fall down," the Healer ordered, once Eponin left them alone. "And, if you say you're sorry one more time…" she grinned. "What's going on, Gabrielle?" the Healer decided to pull no punches. Gabrielle brushed sweaty bangs from her face, shaking her head back and forth, as tears filled her eyes. "I'm not sure I know. All of a sudden…I'm not very sure of who I am."
"Then you happen to be in luck, my friend," Adia responded, placing an arm around the small, forlorn woman's shoulders. "I just happen to be having a special today on helping people figure out that very thing." Adia grinned down at the young Queen and Gabrielle leaned against the taller woman, relieved to be able to let go of this burden…if only for a little while. "I hurt, Adia, and I don't know how to make the feeling go away," Gabrielle said. "I know you do, Gabrielle. I wish I could tell you that I had some type of herb that would make the pain go away, some medicine you could take, but there is only one healing agent for pain like this." Gabrielle looked up expectantly. "Time," Adia finished. Gabrielle lowered her head again. "In most cases I would agree with you. In this situation, time is my enemy." "I think you're going to have to explain that statement." "With every candlemark that goes by, the pain is worse. Every moment that passes buries me a little bit more until I feel as if I'll never get the real Gabrielle back again. Even just now, Adia, when I hit you. I'm acting like a warrior, but I don't have enough of a warrior's mentality to make those kinds of decisions. I feel almost as though I have a skill I can't control. The odd thing is, I don't even know why I'm turning to this. I am not a warrior." Gabrielle added that last as if she were trying to convince herself. The Healer thought about what she'd just heard, trying to convince herself that this was still Gabrielle, but it simply didn't sound like her friend. She decided to take a stab in the dark and hope she hit on the truth. "Gabrielle, I only know of one thing that would cause pain to grow worse over time instead of becoming easier to bear. That would be guilt."
"I know," the young Queen nodded her head sorrowfully. Gabrielle held her head in her hands as Adia looked on. The Healer was slightly stunned to hear this revelation from the young woman. "Gabrielle, talk to me. What could you have possibly done to cause such guilt?" Adia asked in disbelief. Again, the Queen shook her head. "My baby…" Gabrielle trailed off, realizing suddenly that she couldn't admit the truth to Adia. There was only one woman she could possibly share this grief with, but that was the very woman that Gabrielle couldn't tell. She couldn't admit the truth to Xena. What she had would surely end then. "I can't, Adia…I just can't talk about it." "Not even to Xena? Gabrielle, do remember what happened the last time you said that to me? It turned out that Xena acted as your champion in your dreamscape, as well as in reality." "I can't say anything to anyone, especially not Xena," Gabrielle responded, her eyes closing and a heavy sigh escaping past her lips. "I'm so tired, Adia." "Gabrielle, Xena told me about your nightmares. She loves you, she would understand anything she saw in your dreamscape." "Not this," she answered, her eyes filling with tears. "Then let me help you," Adia offered. "It won't work," Gabrielle answered. "What do you mean by that?" "You told me the first time that if anything in the dreamscape appealed to
us, we wouldn't be able to change its outcome." "Do you feel as though you deserve this guilt?" Adia asked. "Yes," Gabrielle's tears fell in earnest with her answer. Adia reached over and held the young woman in her arms, feeling the tension in the body she was holding. She could tell that Gabrielle hadn't completely allowed her guard to go down. "We can work around that, my friend. The first thing we need to do is to get in there and stop the nightmare. Will you let me at least try?" Gabrielle straightened herself up and wondered if she should at least try to end the nightmares. She couldn't tell the Healer that the pain could never be taken away, but perhaps if just the nightmares would end. "I keep doing something in my dream…I can't tell you why, but I can't stop it. The harder I try, the worse it is. It's like someone else is directing my body, making it do something terrible." "Should we get Xena and try this right away?" "No! Not Xena," Gabrielle exclaimed. "It can't be Xena…she can't see…I don't want her to know." "But, Gabrielle--" "No, please, Adia, can't you do it? Please?" "All right, it's okay," Adia tried to calm the young woman. As soon as the Healer mentioned Xena, Gabrielle became nearly hysterical. "I'll enter your dreamscape, but I won't do it behind your wife's back. Xena is the Queen's champion, on any plane of reality. You'll have to explain to her why you want me to take her place." Gabrielle's face twisted into such a tortured grimace that Adia almost gave in. Finally, Gabrielle's desire to rid herself of the horrible nightmares was
greater than the fear of explaining to her wife. She nodded to the woman seated next to her. "Give me a few candlemarks to clean up and explain things to Xe. Can you come by our house?" "Of course. I'll ask Sartori to come along as a little moral support for Xena, okay?" The silent nod of Gabrielle's head again. Adia wondered what in the known world could be plaguing Gabrielle's dreams, to turn a normally open and loving person into such an uncommunicative woman. Gabrielle rose to go. "What are those little things you fought with?" she asked. Adia grinned. "They're called sais. I learned to use the sai when I traveled around Chin for a few seasons. It seemed deadlier than a staff, but it didn't have to be if I didn't want it to." The Healer pulled them from her boots and handed over the weapons, which looked a bit larger in her smaller friend's hands. Gabrielle flipped them; end to handle, easily and the sudden smile on the Queen's face surprised Adia. She looked on as Gabrielle tested their weight in her hands, looking quite as ease with the weapons. "Would you like to learn how to use them?" Adia didn't know for certain why she even asked. She knew that Gabrielle was skilled with a blade, having seen her spar with Xena once or twice, but it was rare. She knew that Gabrielle never really came to grips with the idea of killing anyone, even an enemy. It was something in the young woman's eyes, in the way she appeared completely comfortable with the sais that caused Adia to ask. She thought that Gabrielle looked rather natural with a weapon that could be used for defense, but could also be made to kill.
"Yes, please…they feel very…I'm not sure, but they give me a feeling of security, in a way," Gabrielle answered. Gabrielle finally remembered the seated woman and flipped the sais back, exactly as Adia had, handing them to the Healer. "No, you keep them, my friend," Adia smiled. "I think they know who to belong to better than we." "Oh no, I--" "Please, Gabrielle. I have no need for them anymore." Gabrielle accepted the gift and Adia demonstrated some of the fundamental moves. The Queen caught on quicker than the Healer had, all those years ago. She remembered what her instructor told her, back in Chin, that anyone who wielded a staff, as a weapon, already possessed the skills to become expert with a sai. Adia watched the young woman walk away, Gabrielle flipping the sais in her hands as she strolled along. The Healer was curious as to what could be so terrible in Gabrielle's dreamscape that she couldn't make her own wife privy to it. She knew Xena would do anything to see Gabrielle well, but she certainly didn't envy the small blonde the task of explaining to the Warrior Princess that she would not be the Queen's champion this time. * * *
Gabrielle walked into their home with a heavy heart. She was torn between ridding herself of her nightmares, and allowing anyone else to see the terrifying images that existed within her mind's eye. She didn't understand why Morpheus was torturing her so; she thought the God had befriended them after Xena fought against Hera to save all the Olympian Gods. Morpheus even made it possible for Xena and Gabrielle to meet in the
dreamscape, when the Queen was lying ill and dying and Xena searched for the Elixir of Life in the caverns below Delos. The young woman grew sadder as she realized that even Morpheus knew of her guilt. Her father wouldn't come to her, now Morpheus was trying to punish her through her dreams. Gabrielle enjoyed the way the small sais felt in her hands. It was a strange sensation, rather like when she fought with her staff. The wood became an extension of her, just as these small weapons seemed a part of her. Using a sword wasn't completely foreign to her. Xena taught her the basics, and it must have been assimilation, from watching her warrior fight and practice, which added what little polish she had to her swordplay. Gabrielle never felt comfortable with the heavy blade in her hand, however. Whereas Xena literally felt it was another part of her body, the young Queen thought it felt unnatural to her. With a heavy sigh, Gabrielle opened the door and immediately the lovely scent of lilac assailed her. She sat the weapons on the table as Xena appeared in the doorway of the bathing chamber, a knowing look on her face. "I saw you coming up the hill and thought I'd get a bath ready for you. If your muscles ache anything like mine do after a layoff, you probably need it about now." "Thank you, Xe…you're too good to me…I don't deserve you," Gabrielle added sadly. The warrior quickly moved across the room and enfolded the small woman within her embrace. Xena made it a gentle hug, not even hinting at the desire she felt whenever she touched Gabrielle. She wanted the woman in her arms to know she was safe here and that Xena would wait as long as need be, for her wife to find her way back to herself again. "You're right…you don't deserve me," Xena teased. "No one as wonderful as you, my heart, deserves to be trapped with this old warrior for the rest of their lives. But, you made an honest woman of me, so I guess you're stuck
with me." Gabrielle wrapped her arms around the warrior's waist and squeezed tightly. "Hey, did I put my foot in it again?" Xena asked, pulling back slightly. She tenderly lifted Gabrielle's face and saw the fatigue, along with the hurt, written on the young woman's face. "Brie, what is it? I was only joking, you know that, right?" "It's not that, Xe," Gabrielle answered, closing the distance between them once more. The smaller woman laid her head against the soft leather covering the warrior's chest, listening to the steady heartbeat. How could she tell her wife how true the statement was? She doesn't even realize that I don't
deserve her. She doesn't see that all I ever do is bring her hurt and pain. "I talked with Adia," Gabrielle said. "Oh…did she tell you I talked to her?" Xena asked. The warrior didn't think now would be the best time to start lying to Gabrielle about it. The Queen nodded her head. "Mad at me?" The warrior questioned. Xena didn't think her wife was angry. This definitely wasn't Gabrielle's ‘you are toast, warrior' face. "No, honey, but we have to talk." "Okay…" Xena drawled hesitantly. She had never known those words to preface anything but bad news. "It's not as bad as you think, warrior." Gabrielle offered up a grim smile. "Do you mind if I take that bath first?" "No, come on…" Xena began to lead the way, but stopped abruptly. "I mean, well you probably don't want me in there. I'll just--"
Gabrielle reached out and grabbed Xena's hand, pulling her into the bathing room. "Come on, warrior. You're on back washing detail." * * *
Xena sat on a small stool beside the large tub. She gently ran the soapy sponge along Gabrielle's shoulders and back, watching as her wife stretched some of her tired muscles. "Brie! You've got a pretty nasty bruise under your shoulder blade," Xena exclaimed. "I think I got that when I hit the ground. It's okay, I think it must look worse than it feels," Gabrielle answered with a deliberate air of nonchalance. The Queen caught her wife out of the corner of her eye, seeing Xena wince as the warrior examined the bruise. The dark-haired woman fought harder every season, trying to stay unaffected, as the woman she loved became increasingly more like a warrior. Gabrielle saw Xena's expression and she wanted to reassure her, show her as much love as Xena had shown her in the difficult times. Gabrielle closed her eyes for a moment. She wanted to reach out to Xena; to explain what she was going through, but she simply couldn't. Gabrielle could barely understand the feelings of aggression and anger, hurt and betrayal that she was experiencing. If she didn't understand why she seemed drawn to a warrior's path; why the pain only lessened when she fought, then how in the world could she explain any of it to her wife? "Did someone give you a new toy?" Xena referred to the weapons that Gabrielle laid on the table when she came in from the practice field. "Yes, as a matter of fact. Adia showed me how to use them. I was just… taken with them I guess. Does that bother you, Xe?"
"Yes and no, I guess. I'm proud of you Gabrielle, proud that you can take care of yourself, be a strong leader for your people. I worry less because I know that you're not only smart, but you're skilled with a weapon too. I have to admit, though, I truly wish we lived in a world where the woman I loved didn't feel the need to carry a weapon. I've killed so many people, Gabrielle, even in the name of good, and I know how that affects a person. Sometimes I even carry guilt because I feel as if I'm to blame for setting you on this path in the first place." "Xena, you never forced me to pick up a weapon, that was my own choice." "Maybe…maybe not," Xena replied. "Was it really your own choice, Brie? I let you travel with me, knowing what a headstrong, stubborn girl you were. I should have put my foot down, shipped you off to the Academy in Athens that day you bought the breast dagger." "Then why didn't you?" Gabrielle asked with a tinge of irritation in her voice. "For completely selfish reasons. I think I was in love with you by then." Gabrielle's ire disappeared like ice melting away. She turned her body to look into the beautiful blue eyes that captured her heart so many seasons ago. "Xe, when you say things like that…you make it impossible for me to argue with you. You know that, don't you?" Gabrielle said with a small smile. Xena responded with a sad smile of her own. "Don't you see what I mean, Brie? I should have known that you wouldn't be content standing behind me, allowing me to protect you all the time. I should have known that being around a warrior would set you on the same path, as well. It was all because I was too selfish. I didn't want to let you go, and so I've watched, saying nothing all these seasons while you strayed further and further from your own path."
"And what path would that be? Bard, Queen, Amazon, your wife? Xe, which path is mine…which one am I supposed to follow?" Gabrielle responded. "It seems as if you're following a warrior's path lately," Xena said quietly, her eyes unable to meet Gabrielle's. "I'm not a warrior," Gabrielle repeated for the third time that day. "And if I was, what would be so bad about being like you?" Gabrielle added, turning her face away from her wife's intense gaze. Xena's hand shot out and she quickly turned Gabrielle's face toward her own. "Gabrielle, I am not someone to emulate! You of all people should know that I am the way I am due mostly to the horrible, awful things that I've seen or done. Sweetheart, don't you know yet that any good qualities I possess are because of you, and what you've given me?" Xena finished with tears in her eyes. Tears rose up in Gabrielle's own eyes at the warrior's powerful statement. "I'm sorry, Xe…I just don't see those qualities in me anymore." Xena smiled and cupped the small blonde's face in one hand, brushing away an errant tear with her thumb. "Do you remember the first time we made love?" Xena asked. Gabrielle's eyes sparkled for a moment. "It's hard to forget that evening. It was perfect," she answered. You told me something then, when I explained to you that I had no idea what you could possibly see in an old warrior like me that would be worth loving. You said that you would just have to teach me to look at myself through your eyes." Xena reached over and placed a gentle kiss on her wife's forehead. "That's what I need to teach you, to see yourself through my eyes. No matter what happens, Brie, now or in the future, you will always look like that young girl who ran away from Potidaea to follow me."
Neither of them exchanged another word as Gabrielle rose from the tub, the warrior wrapping a large towel around the small blonde. Gabrielle toweled the dampness from her long hair and sat beside the fire in the bathing area, letting the heat from the flames dry the golden locks. Finally, Gabrielle dressed and she and Xena moved to sit at the table in the main room. They shared a mug of tea, neither of them knowing what more to say. Gabrielle knew there could be no other way but to simply say it, so she held her breath and stepped right into it. "I told you I spoke with Adia…" Xena nodded her head. Every muscle in her body felt tense, as if she were prepared to do battle. "Yea…how'd it go?" she asked in a soft voice. Gabrielle reached over and placed a hand on top of the warrior's hand. "We're going to try entering my dreamscape…to see if it will help me to get rid of the nightmares," Gabrielle responded, keeping her eyes trained on the table. Xena breathed a thankful sigh of relief. She noticed quickly, however, that Gabrielle wouldn't raise her head up to meet the warrior's eyes. That's when Xena first saw it. It was in the way Gabrielle held her body, and how she brushed her thumb across Xena's own hand. It looked a lot like her wife was trying very hard to break something to the warrior. "When you say we, you mean you and I, right?" Finally, Gabrielle looked up. "No, Xe. I mean Adia and I." Xena's jaw tightened. It was a reflexive response and few people would have noticed, but those others didn't know this woman's every move… every breath as Gabrielle did. She recognized the barely discernable move as Xena's way of coping with something new and unpleasant. She was grinding her teeth together, trying not to make her displeasure apparent. "I see," the warrior eventually replied in a controlled voice. "So, the Queen
is appointing a new Champion?" Gabrielle let out a heavy sigh; she knew this wasn't going to be easy. "Xena--" "No, I just want to be clear on this." They stared at one another for a brief moment. Xena didn't want to act this way. In fact, she didn't understand why she was reacting this way. She wanted Gabrielle healed…that was the purpose, right? Did it really matter who entered the dreamscape? It was just the niggling fear that her wife was choosing another over her. For the first time in their relationship, Xena felt Gabrielle was lying to her. That's where her anger came from. It wasn't simply anger…it was fear. "Gabrielle…why are you lying to me?" Xena decided to come straight out with it. "Hades! Xena, why do you have to make such a big deal out of this?" Gabrielle jumped up from the table and began pacing the floor. "Why aren't you being honest with me?" "Because you wouldn't understand!" Gabrielle shot back. "Then explain it to me," Xena stood in front of the agitated woman. "Brie, help me to understand." "That's impossible! It would change things…change the way you feel!" "Brie, didn't I just explain that could never happen?" "It's what you say now, but--" Xena's anger sparked with those words. "So, you're either telling me I'm a liar, or that you simply don't believe me." Gabrielle took a deep breath. "I believe that you want to believe it, Xe,"
Gabrielle admitted in exasperation. "When you say you'll love me, no matter what, I know you think you mean it, but there are things…things that could change that…that will change it." "And you won't tell me what those things might be," Xena straightened herself up, a grim expression on her face. "No," Gabrielle said softly, turning to face away from the warrior. Gabrielle didn't have to turn around to know that when she heard the closing of the door, she was standing alone in the large room.
CHAPTER 8
"LET'S WAIT JUST a little longer, okay?" Gabrielle asked the two Healers. "Sure, we have some time." Adia responded. The tall woman proceeded to set up the rest of the items she might need, exchanging a concerned glance with her wife. Sartori took the boiling teakettle from the fire to refill it again. The water boiled away twice already, but still Gabrielle wanted to wait, hoping Xena would appear. The young Queen stood with her back to the two Healers, her arms folded across her chest, looking out the large window. Gabrielle would have to go ahead with this, but she so wished Xena would change her mind and return. She knew she didn't deserve her wife's understanding, but it didn't stop her from wanting it, needing it. Gabrielle held nothing against her warrior. The Queen thought she would be acting in much the same manner if their roles were reversed. She wondered if it were herself out there,
seething over her wife's refusal to share the truth with her, if she would stubbornly hold onto her anger, or if she would come back to support her wife. She couldn't answer the hypothetical question, even to herself. She had no idea what she would do in a similar situation.
Oh, Xe, I know I don't deserve your help or your compassion, but I dearly would love both right about now. Even if this helps, I'm just prolonging the inevitable aren't I? There's only one way you'll be able to forgive me… that's if you forget me. I can put it off for a little longer, though, can't I? I just have to make sure that you don't find out…just a little more time… * * *
Once Xena was outside all she wanted to do was get away; from the anger and the hurt, so she ran. She ran through the woods until her lungs burned with the same fire that she felt in the muscles in her legs. She felt the strength leave her body and she leaned back against an old tree, sliding along its length until she was seated at its base. She cried out and slammed both fists into the ground at once. Why couldn't Gabrielle tell her? What could her wife be experiencing that could be so terrible? More importantly, why can't I deal with it? Xena froze, listening intently to the slight sound of the branches high above her, creak under someone's weight. The warrior wasn't in the mood for games or enemies tonight. "Whoever you are and whatever you're up to, you'd better make yourself known pretty quick, unless you want to find out what a really bad mood I'm in!" It took only heartbeats for a length of braided horsehair rope to drop from the branches, a tall, slim figure following the rope to stand at Xena's feet.
"Ep! What in Hades are you trying to do, get yourself killed?" Xena hissed. "Hey, I was here first," the Amazon countered. She dropped down beside her friend and pulled up a few blades of grass, tossing them into the breeze. "I was going to say something when I first saw you, but then, well, I heard you yell and…well, by then I figured it might embarrass one or both of us if I said anything." "It's okay," Xena responded tiredly. "Um, look Xena, a bunch of us are going into the mountains hunting. We should be gone about a fortnight." "A little early for it," Xena instantly replied. A dozen or so warriors and students gathered twice a season to hunt for the village. It was late summer now, but the deer didn't usually fill the forests until early fall. "Yea, well, we heard there was a big herd of elk running in the high mountains. I thought it might be the perfect opportunity to bring along some of the younger hunter and tracker wannabes." "Ah," Xena responded. "I was thinking…actually wondering…why don't you come with us, Xena." "I can't leave Gabrielle, Ep, not right now, anyway." "I just wondered if maybe some time apart…well, if it wouldn't…you know, help each of you get a different perspective on things. Shit, I know I'm not putting this well at all, but--" "Ep," Xena placed a hand on the Amazon's arm, quieting her. "It's okay… and I do understand, but I just can't leave Gabrielle alone right now." "Okay, just thought I'd offer, ya know. If you change your mind, we're not leaving till morning, after the hunters get the Queen's blessing." "If anything changes, I'll let you know," Xena replied.
The two warrior's exchanged farewells and Eponin jogged off in the opposite direction. Xena sat still, waiting for some sort of enlightenment to come to her. She was ashamed that she'd run from the situation. Gods, she and Gabrielle's roles were reversing more and more lately. The warrior thought about why she was so angry with Gabrielle for not confiding in her. There was fear, yes, but something more…helplessness. Xena was a woman of actions, not words, or emotions. When Gabrielle needed help, Xena was always there. Now, Gabrielle was telling her that she didn't need the warrior's help, that she could work it out on her own. Xena winced internally at the number of times she did that very thing, not allowing Gabrielle to help the warrior heal. Why is this so important? If she needs to get a handle on this herself, why should I be angry about it? Why am I taking it so personally, when I've done the very same thing to her?
Control. The answer simply popped into her brain and she recognized it immediately as the truth. Xena's whole life was about control, more importantly, getting back the control she'd lost. It wasn't merely a warrior thing; it was something in Xena. Yes, admittedly, Xena chose a warrior's path, not simply out of necessity, but because it was something, she was born to do. Her natural abilities and strengths all but foretold that it would be the path she was destined to choose. Ever since that day when Cortese attacked her village, she'd been fighting to get it back. The things that were ripped from her on that day…she'd been raped, her brother murdered, her mother's love lost…all things that put a subconscious message inside of her head. The message was a need really; a need that said, if she could control, a situation, she would never have to depend on anyone else again. Gabrielle refusing to allow Xena to be a part of the Queen's healing process, removed that control from Xena's hands, thus creating the feelings of helplessness and anger she was now experiencing. The warrior looked at her wrists, remembering the claustrophobic fear that
encompassed her when she realized that Gabrielle had actually removed the warrior's control in their bed.
That's what it's all about for me, isn't it? Controlling any situation. My grief at losing Brianna…it hurt a hundred times more because I didn't have control of the situation. So, now that I know what my major malfunction is, how do I overcome it? Even more, what do I do if I never can? Xena's thoughts turned logically to Gabrielle, once more. If it wasn't for her,
I wouldn't be able to let go as much as I do. Okay, I admit, I had an inkling of what giving up some of that control was like before I met Brie, but if compassion is something that grows like a plant, then the seed was sown the day I saved that baby from its death. Gabrielle's been the one to nurture this wild rose, though. I can't give up on her now. How many times has she stuck by me, never knowing the whole story? If part of loving you, Brie, means letting you keep some things to yourself, then I'll just have to find a way to live with that. Xena was constantly amazed. For all the times she felt the Fate's hand treated her unkindly, if not cruelly, she still felt blessed at the path she was allowed to travel, which led her to Gabrielle. Through it all…through life and death, and even their most recent, heartbreaking turn of events, Xena swore she wouldn't change a thing about her often times painful life, if by changing one small thing, it would have caused her to stray from the path on which she met her bard. "Thank you," Xena whispered aloud. It was the second time the warrior thanked the Fates. This time, her thanks would not go unnoticed. * * *
Lachesis still held the bright thread between her fingers. She didn't understand the power that could reverse the will of the Fates. What was
odder still was the fact that the mortal child's life had ended; yet still the thread glowed brightly, just as brilliantly as the mother's, who came before. Lachesis heard the warrior's thanks, and the thought echoed softly throughout the hall. "Yes, I hear your thoughts, sister," Atropos paused her busy work to turn her head, shears still poised above a twisting network of threads. "A debt still hasn't been paid and we find we owe another." "For such repayment, the gift should be suitable," Lachesis replied. She was overjoyed her sister felt the same way. It became increasingly difficult to hide the fact that she wished to bestow a gift upon the warrior and her Queen. "I know what the gift should be," Clotho added with uncharacteristic enthusiasm. "Impossible!" Atropos said immediately. The other two sisters looked at one another. They would be able to sway their sister, and before the thought was complete, Atropos nodded her head in agreement. "We should wait for our sister, however. She deals well with the Gods. It should come from her lips." "But, we haven't the time," Clotho said. "Besides, she cares little for mortals or Gods any longer, what if she refuses to aid us?" "I will go," Lachesis said with an air of finality. She rose, even as the other two nodded their heads in agreement. Lachesis swept through the Hall of the Fates, leaving her balls of threads on the stool where she was sitting. It was mere moments, simple fragments of time, before Lachesis stood
in the chambers of the God of the Underworld. "It must be a matter of great importance for you to be separated from your sisters," Hades commented. "We would ask a boon of you," Lachesis stated simply. "The Fates asking blessings and favors of the Gods? That's rather new. And what would you have, if I were able to grant it?" Lachesis explained. For the first time the sisters were in disagreement. She could hear Atropos arguing in her head. The God would only be persuaded if he was told the truth of what happened, but Atropos was against telling. She argued that the universe would become chaotic if the Olympian Gods were to discover that someone, somewhere developed a power strong enough to defeat the will of the Fates. Lachesis weighed her sister's argument, but also realized that if the God granted their request, the time must be now. She explained all to the quiet and thoughtful God. When she was finished with her tale, he sat down and brought his hands together until only the very tips of his fingers were touching. "It appears that we both have a chance to repay a debt…" * * *
Gabrielle turned toward the women in the center of the room. "We might as well begin," she said with a heavy voice. Just then the door opened wide and Xena's tall frame filled the doorway. "Sorry I'm late," she said to Adia and Sartori. The warrior walked to where Gabrielle stood and tenderly touched the back of her hand to the Queen's cheek.
"No matter what," the tall woman said softly as Gabrielle put her arms around the warrior's waist. Adia quickly prepared the tea for Gabrielle and as she drank, the four women discussed the nuances of the dreamscape. They spoke in much the same way that Adia explained things seasons ago, when they first entered the realm of unconscious reality. Gabrielle settled herself in Xena's arms, on the cushioned loveseat, while Adia chose to remain seated on the floor. The Healer's preferred spot for dreamscape healing was sitting, cross-legged, her back firmly against the wall. Adia smiled at Sartori, sitting on a wooden chair beside the tall Healer, reaching her hand out to touch her wife. Adia didn't reveal the fact to many, but when she used her gift and entered another's dreamscape, there was always the very real chance that she would be trapped or even killed there. Sartori knew the risks as well as her mate, but she couldn't ask the woman to be less than she was. Adia watched as Xena brushed Gabrielle's bangs from her forehead, gently kissing the young woman's head. The Healer would actually have preferred that Xena not be present for the healing. The more Adia thought about it, the more she was convinced that the Queen and her Consort had more than just a loving bond between them. Their relationship seemed to exist on a number of levels, considering their ability to join one another in the dreamscape, fueled on mere thought and desire alone. Many times, Adia wished she had the nerve to tell her friends that the times they entered the dreamscape on their first anniversary, over the Summer Solstice, they did so without the aid of herbs. What she gave them was no more than a placebo, a harmless herbal sleeping concoction. The Healer was quite amazed that day when Gabrielle thanked Adia endlessly for her help. Now, she was thankful that Gabrielle was more relaxed with Xena near her, but a small part of the Healer feared what would happen if Xena saw the nightmares, that Gabrielle seemed so desperate to keep from the warrior.
"Remember, Gabrielle, if any part of the dreamscape appeals to you, in any way, you won't be able to stop it, nor will I be able to change it. I'm going to leave you with two thoughts before you sleep," Adia told the sleepy young woman. "First, I want you to believe that we can change your dreamscape, no matter how you feel. Second, I'm going to give you the power to end the dreamscape at any time, by simply asking for my help. The moment you use the words, ‘help me,' you'll awake. Do you understand, Gabrielle?" Gabrielle struggled to open her eyes, grown weary with fatigue. Her tongue felt uncooperative so she merely nodded her head before falling into a heavy sleep. "Remember, Xena…Tori, under no circumstances are you to wake me or Gabrielle from the dreamscape. If it doesn't end of its own accord or by her own will, using the phrase I gave her, there's no telling how long I could be trapped there. Okay?" Xena nodded, settling Gabrielle against her chest and wrapping her arms around the small figure. Adia smiled one last time at her own wife, as the Healer adjusted her back against the wall, and closed her eyes. Adia had performed this routine so many times, it took only a dozen heartbeats for her to fall into her meditation, and slide into the young Queen's dreamscape. * * *
Adia paused to catch her breath, moving quickly after Gabrielle once more. She wasn't sure she could even consider the woman she'd been fighting for candlemarks now, her friend Gabrielle. If we all had a personage that was our complete opposite, then that's who the Healer had been battling.
Adia spent the entire dreamscape on the run after Gabrielle. It started on the steps of the Temple of Artemis. Gabrielle had a baby in her arms and the Healer didn't have to think very hard to guess who the child was. Once the bard was inside the Temple, she set the child down and turned around, prepared to fight the taller woman. Adia did all she could in trying to reason with Gabrielle, but the small blonde never spoke a word. She disarmed the Healer easily; armed with the sais that Adia gave her. Gabrielle scooped up the child and took off through the Temple. Adia had never seen the underground tunnels beneath the Temple. There were rumors, of course, but she was even more amazed at the fact that Gabrielle knew her way. The Queen traveled along the passages, and then just when Adia would catch up to her, the young Queen would pause to confront the Healer. These continual encounters usually ended up with Adia flat on her back as Gabrielle picked up the child and ran off again. Adia skidded to a halt as the passageway opened into a large circular room. Located in the center of the room was an altar, where the baby lay on top of the stone altar, quiet yet moving its arms and legs. Amazon warriors circled the perimeter of the room, their gazes fixed upon a hooded figure in a red silk robe. The individual hovered over the child and looked up as the Healer came into view. The hood was pushed back, revealing Gabrielle's face, the Queen looked at Adia with eyes that were colorless and devoid of any emotion. The Healer slowly walked toward the Queen, all the while speaking as if this apparition truly was Gabrielle. The robed version of Gabrielle opened her mouth to speak, but all eyes in the room were suddenly drawn to the main entrance. "Oh Gods!" Adia exclaimed under her breath. Gabrielle took one look as Xena appeared in the doorway and nodded her head in the direction of the Amazon warriors. This was Gabrielle's dreamscape, after all, so it shouldn't have surprised Adia or Xena how quickly the Amazons moved. One moment Gabrielle's guards stood
there, silent and unmoving, the next moment they pinned the two women to the wall as if they were rag dolls. "Xena, what have you done?!" Adia shouted at the warrior. "I didn't mean to…I don't know what happened," Xena turned a confused face to the Healer. Gabrielle never seemed to be aware of the two intruders, with the exception of ordering their bondage. She moved around the altar as if making preparations. Finally, pulling the blanket away from the infant, Gabrielle opened a wooden box that sat beside the altar. When the young Queen revealed the contents of the box, Adia was the first to catch on. By the time the small blonde held up the gleaming dagger, Xena's eyes grew wide. "Gabrielle!" Xena cried out. The hooded figure looked up and Gabrielle's lifeless eyes stared at the warrior as Xena cried out the young woman's name, begging and pleading for her to stop. Suddenly, Gabrielle's brow came together and her face softened, color flowing back into the green eyes. The Queen looked around the room as if realizing where she was for the first time. Adia realized that the apparition had indeed transformed into the real Gabrielle.The Queen's gaze dropped down to her baby, lying on the stone altar, then at the blade in her hand. As quickly as she gained comprehension, her expression turned into one of fear. The Queen's body trembled as her arms fought against a course of action that could not be stopped. Xena and Adia both screamed now, their voices hoarse with the effort. Gabrielle raised the blade until it was directly over her child's heart, tears streaming down her own face. She looked up one last time to the two strangers in her dreamscape and whispered the words her unconscious mind held onto, in order to ease the pain.
"Help me…" she begged in a strained voice. It was apparent that Gabrielle was unable to control her body as some unseen force controlled her actions. Gabrielle could only continue to scream out the words over and over again, praying for an end to the torture. "Why isn't it ending?" Xena shouted through her tears, unable to look away from what she knew her wife was about to do. The warrior struggled in vain against her captors. "Why can't we help her?" "I don't know…I don't understand…" Adia said, watching horror stricken as Gabrielle's arms came down. "Brie…no…"Xena said in barely a whisper, as her strength left her. "Help Meeee!" Gabrielle screamed as the blade came down and settled into the infant's chest. * * *
Sartori's heart nearly stopped at the blood-chilling scream that came from Gabrielle's throat. Within heartbeats of one another, all three of the women awoke, Gabrielle continuing her terrified wail. Adia was doubled over, unable to catch her breath, then Xena became aware of the woman in her arms, whose screams had just turned to sobs. Sartori placed a small amount of foul smelling herbs under Adia's nose. The Healer took a deep breath and gagged, pushing her wife's hand away. "I'm okay…I'm all right." Gabrielle sobbed even more as she came into awareness, remembering
the dream's events and who was present in the dreamscape. She looked up into Xena's face, the warrior's expression a mask of confusion. The warrior didn't mean to, but as soon as Gabrielle looked at her, Xena pulled back, physically as well as mentally. It was a very human reaction to what she'd just witnessed, but to Gabrielle, it was the confirmation of her greatest fear. The Queen jumped up and bolted through the front door of the small home. Xena wasn't quite sure what just happened. The warrior looked at her own hands, turning them over and inspecting them, as if she expected to find blood on them. "Gabrielle," Adia rasped at Sartori. "Don't let her do anything foolish." Realization flowed through the warrior's entire being at the Healer's words. Xena scrambled from her seat and bolted out the door, in search of her wife. "Addy, what happened?" Sartori asked fearfully. Adia could only shake her head, hoping the strong cup of port her wife offered her would soothe her nerves. She eventually calmed, hoping Xena was able to catch up with Gabrielle. When the Healer explained what she could repeat to her wife, Sartori was as shocked as anyone. "I don't understand, Tori. Gabrielle used the safe word I gave her and still it wouldn't end. She had no control over her actions and we were completely helpless to stop her. I've never visited a dreamscape like that before, and I thought I'd seen some bad ones," Adia explained. "Addy, you know as well as I, Gabrielle could never have harmed her own child," Sartori responded. "All I can say is that if she didn't, then she thinks she has. Something must have happened to convince the girl that she did something terrible to her baby. Either that…or Morpheus has some pretty sick ideas and a grudge
against that young woman," Adia replied. * * *
Xena was only a half a dozen strides behind the young woman as Gabrielle rushed into the stables. The warrior rounded the corner to see her wife curled into a ball, hiding in the corner of the nearest stall. Lying in the hay, it was as if the young woman was trying to burrow in, and find a hiding place from the world. Xena's sob wasn't even heard over the gut wrenching wails that Gabrielle was making. The warrior approached her wife and dropped down beside her in the hay. Gabrielle scrambled to move away from her wife; unable to bear the look of disgust and hate she would see in the warrior's face. Xena reached out, to have her hands pushed away by Gabrielle. Using her speed and long arms, the dark-haired woman quickly grabbed the smaller woman and drew Gabrielle to her, pinning her flailing arms to her body. "Brie…Gods, please, Brie…baby it was only a dream…" Gabrielle continued her struggles and Xena's heartache turned to fear when she saw the vacant look in her wife's eyes. The warrior knew insanity and what it felt like, first hand. She remembered the fear and the confusion that stole her mind when the Furies cursed her. She could only hold on to the woman in her arms, praying to anyone who would listen, for their help. "It's just a dream, baby…it's not real…" Xena repeated, holding tightly to Gabrielle. She felt the small blonde's struggles cease, but the weeping continued. She held and rocked the young woman as her own tears fell, until she began to feel Gabrielle's body trembling uncontrollably. "Brie…baby, are you with me?"
"So…c-c-cold…" Gabrielle's teeth chattered, her body curling tighter into herself. "Okay, baby, come on…we need to get you home," Xena said, lifting the small woman into her arms." * * *
Adia still sat on the floor when Xena flung open the door. Both Healers jumped up to assist the warrior as she carried Gabrielle into the room and gently placed her into bed. She grabbed two more blankets from the end of the large bed and wrapped them around the shivering young Queen. "She's in shock," Xena stated to Sartori as the Healer nodded her confirmation. Sartori began to care for her patient as Xena stacked three large logs in the fireplace, a roaring blaze crackling in the hearth in heartbeats. The warrior gulped down a large helping of the port and stood beside Adia while Sartori wrapped some warmed towels around Gabrielle's body. "How could you let all this happen in there?" Xena finally spoke to Adia. "Let which part happen? The part where you showed up in the dreamscape, unannounced, or the part where your wife went screaming into the night?" Adia shot back. Xena turned quickly and grabbed the Healer by the throat of her tunic. It was only Sartori's interruption that kept Adia from being tossed across the room. "Quiet!" she hissed. "Go outside if you want to hit each other." Both women froze, each prepared to strike the other. "I don't want to hit you, Adia…I just…I just wanted to hit something…I'm sorry," Xena
muttered. "Me too," the Healer replied. "Adia, what did happen? I had no intention of entering that dreamscape," Xena whispered. "I honestly don't know. I've never…I just don't understand it." Xena could feel the betrayal in simply voicing the words, but she couldn't stop them. "Did Gabrielle kill our child?" "I don't believe that anymore than you do," Adia snapped. "Then how do you explain what happened? Can misplaced guilt cause that kind of a reaction?" Xena hissed. "It's possible…" "I know that anything is possible, but I thought only someone guilty of their crime could illicit uncontrollable dreamscapes like that. I want to know if you have ever experienced misplaced guilt reacting like that." "No," Adia answered, realizing the conclusion that Xena was coming to. "But, you can't tell me that you actually believe that Gabrielle did anything--" "I don't know what I believe anymore," Xena ran a hand through her hair in exasperation, her voice sounding tired and fragile. "She h-hates me…she hates m-me, now, d-doesn't she?" Adia and Xena both heard the question Gabrielle directed at Sartori. Xena's face fell and as soon as she heard the sound in her wife's voice, she moved to the young woman's side. It was easier for the warrior to believe outlandish thoughts when she wasn't close to the young woman, but hearing Gabrielle's voice, seeing the terrified and lonely expression on the small woman's face, Xena didn't want to believe there was any validity to the dreams.
"It's okay, Brie," Xena sat on the bed, taking the smaller figure in her arms. "I'm right here, baby…it's going to be okay." "I'm s-sorry, Xe…s-so sorry…" Gabrielle cried softly as Xena held and rocked her. "Ssh, it'll be okay." "She'll be all right as long as she stays warm," Sartori said. "Gabrielle, try to drink some of this…it will relax you so you can sleep." "No!" The young woman pushed the cup away with one hand. "I can't go back there." Xena shook her head at the Healer. "It's okay, sweetheart, don't be afraid. I'll be right here to wake you up if the dreams start again." Gabrielle seemed to relax at that thought and grew silent. "I'll wake her up every couple of candlemarks, that should do the trick." Xena said to the Healers. "We'll be okay for tonight." Adia knelt down, on the floor near the bed. The Healer was experiencing her own epiphany, never having experienced a situation within the dreamscape that she couldn't control. "I'm not going to give up, Xena," the Healer whispered. Placing a hand on the warrior's arm, she gave it a gentle squeeze. "There are a lot of meditative, even hypnotic techniques that I can use to rid Gabrielle of the images in her dreamscape. She just needs a fortnight or so of rest. I have some medicines that will calm her down enough to sleep without dreaming. We'll get her through this, Xena, I promise…it's just going to take a little time." Adia and Sartori both nodded their heads to the warrior, returning some order to the room, and then quietly pulling the door closed behind them. Almost two candlemarks later, Gabrielle's body twitched and jerked as she
moaned in her sleep. "Gabrielle…Brie, wake up," Xena gently shook the young woman awake. Gabrielle gazed up into the worried blue eyes looking down at her. She knew she would see this expression. Her wife was trying not to hate her, condemn her; things had already changed. Xena watched as tears welled up in the sad green eyes, spilling over the edges. Gabrielle tried to roll away from her wife, but the warrior was stronger. She held the young Queen in her arms, too afraid to let her go, yet just as terrified at the thoughts that were racing through her head. "Talk to me, Brie…" the warrior said. Gabrielle slowly shook her head, turning away from her wife. There isn't
any point is there? She was there…I can see it in her eyes…she knows what I've done. It's changed already. Xena continued to hold the small woman in her arms, the dark-haired woman's mind racing with the implications of what Gabrielle had done, and what the warrior saw for herself in her wife's dreamscape.
There's an explanation…I know it, there has to be. Gabrielle wouldn't… she couldn't. The Gods…that's it! It was one of them…they've been suspiciously silent lately. Gabrielle says she did it…why would she say that if she were innocent? Please no, don't let it be true. Please, just don't let it be. Would Gabrielle have made a deal with one of the Gods? Maybe to save someone, to save me…thinking she was doing the right thing. No! She wouldn't do that! She did, though…once before, didn't she? That was different…she was confused…she thought she was doing what was best--
It cost Solon his life, though… No! That's not who Gabrielle is! But, she did it before… Xena closed her eyes and pressed the back of her head against the headboard in a futile attempt to silence the voices at war within her head. Every explanation she could come up with, the strong voice in her mind reasoned away. Upon opening her eyes, she saw Gabrielle staring back at her. They both knew the expression the other was wearing; they'd seen them before. Gabrielle's held sorrow and regret, coupled with a pain so enormous that it took all of Xena's strength just to hold the eye contact and return her wife's gaze. The warrior didn't even have enough strength left to muster a weak smile. She ran her fingers through Gabrielle's hair, watching as tiny bits of straw and chaff fell from the blonde strands. She gathered what love and understanding she could from the warring factions of her brain, and expressed it through her eyes. Xena knew it wasn't much, and try as she would, she was simply too confused to offer any more. Xena situated Gabrielle's head to rest on her chest, her own chin resting atop the blonde head. "Gabrielle, I'm…I'm going to go with the warriors in the morning on their hunt." Xena paused. Gabrielle became so still, the warrior wondered if her wife fell asleep. The small blonde stirred slightly, but she just lay there as if she knew there would be more. "It will only be a fortnight and…I think we could both use some time--it's just that I need to sort things out…get it straight in my head, you know? Adia will be here, she's got some really good ideas…she has medicines she hasn't even tried yet." Xena ran her fingers through Gabrielle's hair, smoothing long bangs away from a furrowed brow.
"She can help you, sweetheart," Xena's voice broke and she knew what she was doing, even as she cursed herself for doing it. What she did now, she did for herself, not her wife. Her own tormented mind left her confused and unable to help anyone, not even herself. "She'll take good care of you, baby. You just…just need some rest, that's all. Some rest…plenty of sleep without any dreams. You relax and get well and I'll be back in no time." Xena looked down at Gabrielle and the young woman had her eyes closed. The warrior could tell from Gabrielle's breathing that her wife wasn't asleep, but she understood the smaller woman's behavior. Xena wondered if she would react any differently if Gabrielle decided to abandon her. * * *
"Well, well…how the innocent have fallen," a female voice laughed evilly. "I will see you chained on the highest mountain top until the vultures pick your bones clean." Again, the laughter. Apollo struggled against his bonds until his wrists and arms were raw and bleeding. His efforts were futile. The oppressive air that existed in the small cell sapped a God's powers entirely. He wasn't alone in the small area that enclosed him. A tall figure was bound next to him, a blindfold fixed across the hooded figure's eyes. The cell was familiar to the handsome God, as it should be, since he was the one who created it. The small room, deep underground in the subterranean caverns on the island of Delos, was created to remove the strength of any God or mortal that should attempt to steal the Elixir of life
that was housed there. The Elixir had since been removed and a new hiding place created, but Hera never forgot the site of her defeat. The small room had one wall blown out, compliments of the Warrior Princess. Now, the open space was covered with bars, fashioned by some Godly spell. They sparkled and shimmered, the illusion of solidity. "Did I tell you it was a girl? Yes, you had a granddaughter, Apollo…well, for a heartbeat…until I stole her life-force." "Why, Hera? I do understand how you could be that evil, it wouldn't be the first time you've taken the life of an innocent child, but what's the point in destroying my daughter's relationship with Xena? What have you to gain?" "Oh, Apollo," Hera spoke from the other side of the barred cell. "You have no idea what I will gain. You don't understand what it's like to feel that rush when you see your enemies crushed under your feet. Especially the ones that were so smug when they thought they'd bested me. It's your turn to fall, Apollo. You and Xena stole victory from me last time, now it's payback time, and I'll settle for nothing less than your complete destruction." "If it's me you want, Hera, then so be it, but please…I beg of you, not Gabrielle." Apollo's eyes filled with tears at the visions he'd already seen, his own daughter ready to give up on life and Xena believing her wife had slipped into madness. "But you're missing the point, Apollo. I've discovered the one thing to bring about the sure annihilation of you and the warrior with one blow. It's ironic that the God of Healing and the Warrior Princess should both have only one true weakness…and imagine my delight that it's the same thing. There is only one vulnerability that you share with that mortal warrior, and that is the little Amazon Queen." Hera made the scrying bowl disappear with a wave of her hand. She
stood outside the bars, forcing the young God to watch some of what transpired in his daughter's life thus far. "Aren't you forgetting, Hera? People will miss me. Don't you think my sister will wonder where I am? Gabrielle will call to me…the sun can't set without me," Apollo spat. "Oh, dear Apollo, the mortal world has experienced many sunsets since you've been…shall we say, detained. I've found someone to fill in quite nicely, riding that little chariot of yours. And, do try to be a little more unassuming. Your sister wonders where you are, but that little tramp is too stupid to figure it out, and as for your pathetic Gabrielle, I've arranged for her to believe that you've turned your back on her." "That's impossible! Gabrielle will never give in to the kind of despair you're talking about." "Guess again, young Apollo. Your cellmate has made it excruciatingly easy to manipulate the little blonde. You see, with Morpheus bound, he is but a prisoner. With his sight denied, he cannot enter the dreamscape…Gabrielle's or any other. I've been using an old friend of mine, a mystic from the wrong side of the road, if you will. He was happy to help in exchange for a little R&R from Tartarus." "On the other hand, perhaps you'd like to keep up…" The Goddess returned the scrying bowl, allowing Apollo to view his daughter once more. "Take a good look, Apollo. By the time the sun sets tonight, your daughter will slit her own throat. Her warrior will fall on her sword once she finds out. All's well that ends well." Hera's laughter continued long after she disappeared, just as Apollo's screams echoed off the walls of the caverns. * * *
"Just look after her, okay?" Xena asked the Regent. The warrior rose early and packed enough supplies for the fortnight away. She checked to find Gabrielle sleeping soundly for a change. Xena knew that leaving to join the hunt would not go over well with Ephiny. The Regent made it clear that she felt Xena was deserting Gabrielle, just when the Queen needed her the most. "Look, I know I don't know everything that's gone on with you two in the last couple of days, but leaving Gabrielle…you can't tell me that's going to help," Ephiny said. "I'm not leaving her!" Xena hissed. "I am going on the hunt for fourteen days, maybe less. Adia is going to be seeing Gabrielle and helping her to…to work out some issues, but I am not leaving her." "Does Gabrielle know that? Tell me, Xena, do you think if you say it enough times, you'll start to believe it?" Ephiny asked softly. Suddenly Xena lost the hard edge to her voice. "I don't know what else to do, Eph. I swear, if I could come up with another way, I would. Right now, I just don't know what's going on with Gabrielle and I don't want her to see that everyday in my face. I'm not asking you to believe me, or even agree with me, I'm only asking that you be a friend to Gabrielle." "Xena…you never have to ask me to do that. Gabrielle was my friend, long before she became my Queen. You're my friend too…" Ephiny placed a hand on Xena's shoulder. "If I can do anything to help you deal with all of this, Xena…" "Just keep an eye on Gabrielle. That will help more than you know," Xena finished before leaving. * * *
"Hey," Xena said softly as she walked in to find Gabrielle fastening her leather belt around her hips. The young Queen was dressed in the traditional leather top and skirt that she wore to many official ceremonies. "Hi," Gabrielle said, quickly lowering her eyes to the floor. She could barely look at Xena, now that the warrior knew the truth. "I wanted to say…to see you before I left," Xena stammered. She wanted to say so much, but her tongue felt heavy and uncooperative. She crossed the room to retrieve her weapons and saddlebags, laying them on the table. "You'll see me at the ceremony. You'll need to be blessed if you want to join in the hunt." "I know, but…I meant alone." "Oh," Gabrielle replied, turning to look out the window. "I guess…I'll see you in a fortnight, then," Xena said. "Are you coming back, Xe?" Gabrielle asked in a low whisper. The young Queen's voice sounded so forlorn and frightened that Xena moved behind the woman and wrapped her arms around the small figure. "I'm your wife, Gabrielle, of course I'll be back. Please believe that." Xena kissed the back of her wife's head. Quickly grabbing her belongings from the table, the warrior walked out the door and toward Eponin's hut. Gabrielle swallowed back the sobs that rose up in her throat. She took note that her wife said nothing about love. Because she's my wife, she'll
return…out of duty…you shouldn't have to live that way, Xe.
CHAPTER 9
GABRIELLE WAS NEARING the last few hunters. She blessed the experienced, then the hopeful students, many of them, obviously waiting all their life for a chance to bow down before their Queen as a hunter and receive her mark of faith. The young Queen chose not to hide behind her mask today, although a part of her desperately wanted to. She knew she looked like Tartarus, her eyes red rimmed and swollen, dark circles underneath, and her face drawn and pale. She looked down at the last woman to kneel before her, recognizing the dark head. She placed her hand on top of the raven hair and spoke the same words the other hunters heard, "You have the blessing of the Queen." Gabrielle watched as the face lifted, but Xena made no move to rise from her knees. The warrior's blue eyes sparkled with unshed tears. "Soon, Brie…I'll be back soon." Gabrielle placed her hand on Xena's cheek, touching the soft skin as though she were committing it to memory. She gathered the last of her resolve and offered a smile to her wife. The Queen was amazed and grateful that Xena put up with her this long. "Good bye, Xena," Gabrielle whispered softly. The warrior's keen hearing picked up the soft-spoken farewell. She was glad that Gabrielle was actually speaking to her, but there was something in her wife's eyes, something she couldn't place. Xena looked momentarily confused, then gave a small smile to her wife, right before she jumped on Argo and trailed after the other members of the hunting party.
* * *
"Is what she said true?" Apollo asked his cellmate. "Sadly, my friend, it is. These ropes mean nothing to me; the dreamscape knows no physical boundaries and nothing can bind it. Having my eyes blindfolded, however, means a great deal. I can see, but cannot enter your daughter's dreamscape at all." "What do you see, Morpheus? Is Hera telling the truth…did she kill my grandchild?" "I fear for your little one. Hera speaks the truth; she stole the child from its mother's womb only candlemarks before its birth. Your daughter…Hera is manipulating the young girl's dreamscape to the point…I fear Gabrielle has given up. Unless we can intervene in some way, Hera's words will come true…your child will take her own life and give up the mortal realm." Once again, Apollo strained and lunged at his bindings, but in this cavern room, now converted to a cell, his strength was less than even a mortal man. His arms and wrists bled, his shoulders sagged forward in an unmistakable posture of defeat. Gods never experienced pain or defeat; they were new emotions. Many of the Olympian Gods had numerous children, sprinkled throughout the mortal realm, the product of romantic dalliances with mortal women. Apollo felt this loss especially hard, as Gabrielle was the only child he had. The handsome God was never one for trysts with mortals, but he fell in love with Gabrielle's mother the very first time he saw her walking along the river with his sister. It pained him to see the life she now led, living with a man who became more bitter and angry as the seasons past. Because of his promise to Hecuba, he never told the girl that he was her real father, content to watch
and hope that someday, Gabrielle would learn who the people were that truly loved her. He did break his promise on occasion. There were times in his child's life that required the intervention of a God. Apollo would never forget the day he carried Gabrielle's burned and broken body to the Halls of Olympus, requesting his father's permission to return life to the girl. Gabrielle gave her own life that day, pushing Hope into the lava pit, simply to save the woman she loved. Zeus looked down in compassion at the young God, acquiescing to Apollo's wish. Gabrielle never knew that she'd been dead, then reborn. It became one of the many instances in her life that she could not explain, yet did not examine too closely. Deep inside, the young Amazon Queen feared what she would see as an answer to the unexplained miracles in her life. A shimmering flash appeared on the other side of the illusionary bars. Apollo looked up, disappointed, but realizing that this would be the obvious choice for Hera's partner in crime. "Man, little bro…that chariot is a bitch to drive!" Ares flicked some imaginary dust from his arms. "Hera says she'll let you out once you've learned not to mess around with her. Hey," the dark-haired God said in alarm. "Don't pull on the ropes, bro…look what you're doing to yourself. Hera says your punishment will be over soon and she'll let you out of here." Apollo took a deep breath. Ares was not a stupid man, but a pair of pretty eyes always had the power to sway him. He could be incredibly dense at times. Apollo didn't want to sound to panicky or patronizing. Ares was his brother, after all, faults and all. "Ares, please listen closely. Hera is punishing me, it's true, but this is not temporary. She is going to destroy me and Morpheus…I expect Artemis will come next--"
"She said you might tell me something like that…said you didn't want to take your defeat like a man." Ares smirked. "Ares please…look here in the scrying bowl…the image of Gabrielle. Hera is using the girl's dreams to push Gabrielle into killing herself, and when that happens, Xena will take her own life out of guilt and remorse. Please, brother, just look into the image in the bowl." Ares peered past the bars, into the bowl. He could only see the blurry shapes of movement from his angle. "Oh, sure…I step in there to look in the bowl. Right!" Apollo let out an exasperated sigh, but held his temper. "Ares, open up the image for yourself." "Oh, yea…" Ares waved his hand and the shimmering image of Gabrielle came into focus. "What's the deal?" Ares grew concerned when he saw the young woman laid a sharp dagger beside the tub. "Step into her mind and you'll se the truth, Ares," Apollo pleaded. "This is a trick, right? You said if I ever entered her mind again you'd have Athena castrate me," Ares drawled. "Ares…this is an emergency, just do it!" Ares' brow furrowed together, staring intently at his younger brother. It wasn't like Apollo to become this agitated over anything. The dark-haired God turned back to the spectral image before him and concentrated on the small blonde. The Queen filled the tub in the bathing area with hot water. Gabrielle once read that if you cut an artery, the pain would be short lived; it would feel as though you were going to sleep. She also read that warm water would prevent the blood from clotting, and ease the sensation of being cold,
which followed when the human body suffered a large amount of blood loss. The last thing the Queen did before disrobing was to place her Queen's dagger beside the tub. It was her ceremonial dagger, more for decoration than practical use, yet she didn't have anything symbolic in mind; it was simply the sharpest dagger she owned. The young woman wanted to die, not cause herself unnecessary pain.
Ares pulled his mind back from the small blonde's and had to take a deep breath. The mortal's emotions of despair and sorrow were a step beyond intense. The God looked over at Apollo. "Is this a trick, Apollo? I swear if you an Artie are--" "Damn it all, Ares, my child is about to kill herself!" Tears streamed down Apollo's face. "Please, Ares…help her," the God begged in a small voice. "Okay, I'm confused all of a sudden…give me a heartbeat." "Gabrielle doesn't have a heartbeat!" Apollo shouted at the top of his voice. Ares looked from his brother to the image before him. Gabrielle sat in the tub, her eyes closed. Suddenly, with a fierce look of determination, the young Queen picked up the dagger. * * *
"I'll take that, thanks," Ares said, plucking the dagger deftly from Gabrielle's fingers. "Ares! What in Hades…get out of here and leave me be, you miserable
son-of-a-bacchae!" the Queen hissed vehemently. "You're getting a mouth on you like a soldier. Didn't anyone ever tell you that a Queen isn't supposed to talk that way?" Ares shot back. "This is serious stuff here, Gabrielle…is this some sort of a trick?" Ares asked, turning his head to look around the room. The despair in Gabrielle's voice was apparent. "Ares…just go. This is my business." "Okay, give me a heartbeat, here," the God said in concern, pacing across the room. "It could be a trick…and I ought to let you do it, for all the times you tried to make me look like an idiot. I gotta check on this, though." Ares mused this last part to himself. "Don't do anything stupid until I get back." Ares turned to go. "Ares…my dagger…" Gabrielle held out a hand. Ares nearly placed the weapon in the young woman's hand, but pulled back at the last moment. "Nah, you never do anything your told, that much I do know." The God swirled a hand over the Queen's head and Gabrielle felt a tingling sensation in her chest. "The power of might against the power of will, on this day will stand…The heart's judgment I will prevent, to keep you from hurt at your own hand." Ares handed the dagger to Gabrielle. "That ought to hold you till I can get this mess figured out," Ares said, quickly leaving in a flash of blue shimmering light. Gabrielle thought she understood the spell the God placed on her, but she immediately tested her theory. Raising her arm, dagger in hand, she attempted to slice open her own wrist. Her arms shook and sweat broke out across her forehead at the strain to get the blade close to her skin. The frustrated woman snarled, tossing the blade across the room. Ares put a
spell of protection on Gabrielle…to protect the Queen from herself. "Ares! Arrreeeesss!" All in the village heard Gabrielle's screams. The Royal Guard had to explain to the perturbed Queen what they were suddenly doing in her bath, but since there was no foe to be found, the chagrined guards left as quietly as possible, offering only a shrug to the Regent, who arched an eyebrow in return. * * *
"Do you want to talk about the dream?" Adia asked. "No," Gabrielle replied. Her failed attempt to end her life put her in a dour mood. She knew…as soon as Xena looked at her through eyes that held something less than the unconditional love they always shared…Gabrielle knew this was the only way. Her grief-stricken mind reasoned that it made perfect sense. Unbeknownst to the young Queen, Hera's interference in Gabrielle's mind, caused her to believe that Xena would be hurt at first, but Gabrielle was sure her wife would breath a sigh of relief. The Healer and the Queen sat outside in the warm afternoon sun. The entire village knew this small cove as Gabrielle's Pond. It was where the young Queen often spent her quiet time, when she needed peace from the rigors of managing the Amazon Nation. Adia thought this would be the perfect spot for she and Gabrielle to talk about last night's events. The Healer was a little surprised to hear Xena was leaving on the hunt. A small part of her, however, expected something of the sort. Adia admitted to her wife later that she had been, quite literally, terrified of a dreamscape encounter in which she had no control whatsoever. She never before saw Xena in the shape she was last evening. It wasn't the same warrior who faced any challenge, braved any terror, for her wife. Xena appeared to
believe what she saw, rather than what her heart told her about the woman she loved. The Healer could see Xena trying to believe in Gabrielle. Adia just wished she had spoken to the warrior before she left. The Healer would have liked to tell the dark-haired woman to discount what she saw in Gabrielle's dreams and trust in her love for the young Queen. Adia lost her opportunity when the warrior stopped by to quickly tell Adia and Sartori, she was leaving Gabrielle in their care for the next fortnight. Xena was taken back to hear that Sartori would be traveling with the hunt. For some reason Xena appeared suspicious, perhaps wondering if the Healer meant simply to keep an eye on the warrior. Sartori talked at length, attempting to convince the dark-haired woman that with all the students traveling with the other Amazons in the hunting party, a healer seemed a smart idea. Especially after last season's incident where one of Eponin's own students accidentally shot her in the leg with a practice arrow. So, with her wife gone, Adia saw no reason to waste any time. Once the hunting party left the village, the Healer was prepared to give Gabrielle a couple of candlemarks before Adia showed up at the young Queen's door. The screams from the Queen's quarters and the Royal Guard's inability to explain why, prompted the Healer's visit even sooner. "How was Xena feeling about what happened?" Adia asked. "I guess you'd have to ask her." "Did you sleep last night?" "A little…off and on," Gabrielle answered tersely. Adia sighed heavily, falling backward from her seated position, her back hitting the grass with a soft thump. "Gabrielle…" she began, "little one…" she said softly rising to one elbow. That got the Queen's attention, as Gabrielle turned and looked in surprise at the Healer. "I've never heard you call me that before."
"I'm sorry, Gabrielle. Does it bother you?" Adia asked in concern. "No…no, it's just that…when Xena and I first traveled together…she called me that sometimes." "I apologize, I hope I haven't brought up any bad memories," Adia commented. "Not at all…good ones, as a matter of fact." A small smile appeared on the Queen's face. "Why did you…call me that?" "It…it was just a slip of the tongue, that's all. I guess because you exasperate me, my Queen, like someone else I used to know." "Who?" "Never mind, it's not important," Adia replied. "So, you ask me all the questions…I tell you my most terrifying fears. You want me to confide the secret I don't want to share with anyone, but you won't even answer one simple question," Gabrielle responded. Adia listened and, not only heard, but agreed with the young woman. She looked up at the Queen, who was sitting on a log beside the Healer, and expressed her apology in the form of sheepish grin. "Well said. You're right, Gabrielle…it's not fair for me to expect you to open your heart and your mind to my examinations, without being as candid myself." Adia sat up again and folded her hands in her lap. "The endearment really did just slip out, Gabrielle. I used to call my sister that. I'm so tall and she was a tiny thing…I guess you just remind me of her." "What's her name?" Gabrielle asked. "Her name was Emily."
"Was?" "She died a number of seasons ago…a fever took her," Adia added unconvincingly. "Oh Adia, I'm so sorry. Was she ill for long?" Adia ran her fingers through her short hair. Looking up at Gabrielle, tears entered the Healer's eyes. "I'm sorry, Gabrielle…that was a lie. Emily wasn't ill, not like that anyway. She…she was beautiful, she loved everyone, and I don't think she had a hurtful bone in her body." Adia paused and cleared her throat, the Queen sat, listening intently to every word. "Emily had one problem…she heard voices. She could go on for moons, simply being the loving girl she was born to be. Then, for no apparent reason, something would set her off and she would do the oddest things. Just when everyone was sure that she was completely mad, she'd come back to herself again. It was always the same. Sometimes the voices would disappear for a whole season and we thought that she'd beaten it, that perhaps we appeased whatever God afflicted her with the curse. Then as quickly as it left, it would return. Finally, when the voices returned, Em began trying to hurt herself…trying to kill herself. She said the voices told her to. I tried to take care of her after our mother died. I told her everyday how important it was not to listen to them…not to give in to what the voices said." The Healer drew her legs up against her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs, resting her chin on her knees. "She became worse one winter and I thought her mind finally left her for good. She was like that for 3 seasons. The hardest part was to have her come up to me when she would be lucid and ask me to call her, little one. It was my pet name for her and I always knew she was all right when she would do that. I think the worst of it, for her, as she grew older, she was always aware that something was wrong with her. Some time later, she
simply couldn't take listening to them anymore. She turned up missing and I tore the forest apart searching for her, the whole tribe did. They found her in the bottom of a deep ravine; her tiny body was so broken. She was barely alive, but when they brought her into the village, she asked me to call her, little one. She said she did the only thing she could think of to frighten the voices out of her head. She said when she jumped from the cliff; the voices all ran away. She looked so…so happy that day. She said she finally got something right. I think I lost a piece of myself that day. I could go into a person's dreamscape, into their mind, but I couldn't heal my own sister enough to make her want to live." Gabrielle placed a hand on Adia's shoulder, squeezing slightly. "Why do I remind you of your sister?" You're both small in stature, but enormous in heart. She had a smile filled with light, just like yours. She also had a secret. It took many seasons before I even found out about the voices. She kept it to herself; afraid she would hurt our family name or me. She finally gave into her despair, though. I wasn't good enough to save Em." Long moments of absolute silence passed between the two women. When at last, Adia wiped her tears on her shirtsleeve and looked up, she met with the sight of Gabrielle, sitting hunched over, as if in pain. Tears streamed down the young Queen's face. She turned to Adia, and in that moment, the Healer did indeed think the young Queen reminded her of Emily. "Do I remind you of her because you believe I'm going mad?" the Queen's small voice asked. "Oh, Gabrielle…" Adia said, opening her arms to the young woman. It was all the encouragement the Queen needed and she fell into the embrace, sobbing. Adia let her cry for a long while, until Gabrielle's eyes
had no more tears to offer. "Promise me. Adia…please, promise me…I don't want anyone to know…I don't even want you to know, but I want you to see that I'm not crazy." "I don't think you're crazy at all. Why don't you want to tell me your fears, Gabrielle? Do you think I'll change my opinion of you…once I hear?" Gabrielle nodded her head. "I know you will…you won't be able to help it." "My dear, Gabrielle, I can't begin to explain what I've seen in my travels through the dreamscape. I've witnessed the worst that humanity can offer to his fellow man. I've seen into the hearts and souls of the most heartless of killers. There is nothing you can show me that will change my mind about what kind of a woman you are. "I murdered my baby," Gabrielle stated flatly. "Why do you believe this to be true?" "Because it's what happened," Gabrielle explained. "Sartori told me… Xena told me…I knew what I was supposed to do, but I didn't. I cared nothing for the welfare of my child and I did what I wanted to do." "Why?" Adia asked, trying to decide if it were true or if Gabrielle's grief was clouding her judgment. "I don't know," Gabrielle answered. "Pride? I was tired of having everyone tell me to take it easy. Xena began to care so much about the baby's safety; I felt that I didn't matter. I really don't know why, but it's not something I did once…I did it again and again." "Gabrielle, that is called an accident, not murder," Adia explained. The Healer held the small Queen in her arms, stroking her hair, feeling the young woman shake her head back and forth in disagreement. Adia was fighting an uphill battle, but she believed that with some time and patience, she and Gabrielle could overcome the guilt that plagued the woman. What
the Healer had a hard time understanding was how Gabrielle could have let this build up so high in her mind. It was tragic and terrible, but it wasn't justification for the label of ‘murderer' that Gabrielle stamped upon herself. The Queen was usually a very patient and intelligent woman. This kind of hysteria simply wasn't normal for Gabrielle. Adia explained, in detail, where she wanted to go from here, regarding Gabrielle's treatment. The young Queen nodded, but the Healer thought she saw something unusual in Gabrielle's gaze. It looked suspiciously like defeat, even though; suicide was also uncharacteristic for the Bard. "Little one, I want you to promise me something. Promise me, Gabrielle, that you won't…won't hurt yourself. I know what despondency does; it plays tricks with the mind. Don't let your misery dictate your actions." Gabrielle answered the plea very carefully, for as Adia spoke, the young Queen already formulated a plan. Gabrielle knew what she would have to do. One way or another, she would free her wife of the burden of having to see Gabrielle's face…having to live with the shame. "You have my word, Adia, I won't try to kill myself, if that's what you're worried about," Gabrielle answered. * * *
Nightfall seemed as if it took an eternity in coming. Gabrielle spent the rest of the day preparing. She realized that Ares, for whatever sick reasons he had, wasn't about to let the Queen harm herself by committing suicide. There would be only one other way for Gabrielle to free Xena of her obligation…if she disappeared. Half the village already thought her touched with a grief-induced madness. They would believe she ran off, happy they didn't have to deal with an insane Queen. Then there was Xena. Gabrielle's chest felt a stabbing pain
whenever she thought of her beloved warrior. Xena would take off after her. The warrior would search, but Gabrielle believed the warrior wouldn't look long. Her Consort would breathe her own sigh of relief, simply glad that Gabrielle chose an honorable way out. In the young Queen's mind, this was the only path she could take. She would run…far away, where they didn't know Greeks and had never heard of the young woman who followed the Warrior Princess. Gabrielle outfitted herself with only a small pack. She brought a sack full of Amazonian dinars along, tied to her belt, yet hidden by her cloak. The problem was that Gabrielle was well known as the Amazon Queen, her own tales of her travels with Xena were told in taverns and inns all across Greece. Her clothes, her looks, even the staff she carried, and fought with, she had a reputation with all of them. They marked her as who she was, and when Xena asked around, Gabrielle would be an easy target to follow. Gabrielle thought about it and realized she would have to become something, or someone, who no one would expect. She would have to become something she knew was inside of her. She crossed the room and lifted the sais Adia gave her. An unknown woman warrior, that was who she would have to become. She dressed in a soft leather outfit, the kind of clothing she wore hunting. The shirt had long sleeves, long enough to cover the marriage tattoo, on her wrist. A loose, short sleeve covering that fell down past her thighs went over that, along with leather trousers. Plain brown boots finished off her new outfit. She needed to look completely different, so that any mention of a blonde haired warrior would not spark attention. She gazed into the polished looking glass Xena placed on the wall by their bed. Gabrielle ran her fingers through her long blonde tresses. "Completely opposite," she said with sadness. The Queen reached for the Amazon dagger one last time and began to slice through the long lengths of her hair. She congratulated herself, as she looked in the mirror, rather impressed at the job she'd done. She quickly
tossed the long strands of hair into the fireplace. Gabrielle looked longingly at her staff. She would feel naked and unprotected without it. She sewed some leather loops onto her own boots to give her sais a resting place. She had to admit that she had some natural ability with the weapons. She learned extremely fast and felt confident enough to use them in a fight. That, combined with the hand-tohand arts that Xena made sure the Queen mastered, would protect her. The problem was that Gabrielle could use a staff in her sleep. "No one ever said this would be easy," she muttered. The young Queen recognized the fact that she could be killed trying to defend herself with untested weapons. That's when Gabrielle's determination grew. If Ares wouldn't let her kill herself, perhaps she could work around this spell of protection. If she fought with the sais, chances are her end would come more sooner than later. Gabrielle collected the necessary travel items and placed them in her small pack. There were two items the Queen refused to part with. She removed the ring her father gave her and placed it on the opposite hand. Lastly, she tucked the long chain and medallion that Xena made for her, under her shirt. Two hearts had been formed from the shape and scrollwork of Xena's breastplate, each heart holding a small stone, one blue sapphire, and one emerald green. The hearts were joined together at the points so they created the letter X. With a heavy sigh, Gabrielle turned her head to look around the room. Her writings, small tokens and gifts, she was giving up her life in order to allow Xena the freedom the warrior deserved. Tears welled up into her eyes, but the Queen refused to release them. She wouldn't cry, not over this. She was doing this for Xena, just as the older woman made sacrifices for her. Gabrielle's last thought, as she left their home, was that she hoped Xena wouldn't hurt for very long. The small blonde found it no easy task to sneak out of the protective embrace of the Royal Guard, or to elude the sentries in the trees, but she
was an Amazon Queen after all. That and seasons spent with the Warrior Princess were all Gabrielle found necessary to slip from the Amazon village in the dead of night. There were three small towns, half a day's walk in any direction. Gabrielle vowed she would bypass them and would not stop until she neared the large city of Pella. There, perhaps, she could lose herself at an inn. The most important point was simply not to head in the direction of either Amphipolis or Potidaea. Once she reached Pella, she would stay north of her homeland, crossing the Strymon, making for Abdera. From that point in Thrace, she could book passage on a ship and head anywhere in the known world. The night was still warm, yet Gabrielle moved quickly. She was focused on her goal…to place as much distance between herself and who she had been as possible. She used the meditative technique her father taught her, in order to close her mind to prying Gods. The last thing she needed was Ares telling Xena where the Queen was. "Good bye, Xe. Please believe that I loved you…to the very end," Gabrielle whispered to herself, slipping from the open road, to follow a path, deep within the woods.
CHAPTER 10
"SO, ARE YOU going to speak to me at all on this trip?" Xena asked in a tense voice. "I'm not sure it would be a good idea," Eponin answered. The two warriors laid their bedrolls on opposite sides of the large
campfire, slightly apart from the rest of the group. One of the other experienced hunters noticed the friction between the two earlier in the day, in the way they intentionally avoided one another. She passed the word to a couple of the others and managed to get the students to keep their distance for a spell, at least so they could get through this first night. "Meaning?" Xena asked through clenched teeth. Eponin already stretched out on her blanket, watching the stars in the night sky. She sat up to look at Xena, who seated herself on a nearby log. "Meaning that I can't understand what you're doing out here, babysitting a bunch of students, when you should be home with your wife." Xena sighed. She knew she would take some hits over the fact that she left Gabrielle at the worst possible time, but she left her in Adia's hands…that was a good thing, wasn't it? It made perfect sense to the warrior. Xena knew one thing in her heart…she still loved her wife. It was her head, the logical part of her brain, that seemed as if it were under another's control. It was causing her to think and feel things that she knew couldn't be true. Her brain made such good arguments regarding those thoughts, though. Her mind reasoned and the answer sounded plausible, it was simply that Xena felt almost…manipulated. Since she couldn't narrow anything down, beyond a vague feeling of unease, she took it all as a part of her own grief. "You don't understand everything that's gone on," Xena replied. "I know that, Xena, and whether you want to admit it or not, I know you're hurting, but Gods, Gabrielle is hurting too. I just don't get why you wouldn't want to be there for her." "I don't understand it either," the warrior said softly. Xena lowered her head and stared at her own hands in the yellow glow of the campfire. "We're going through…it's pretty private, Ep. I don't know if it would be right for me to talk about it. I don't know if Gabrielle would want anyone to know. I just knew that it was the kind of thing that we needed to be apart for a little while to get a new perspective on."
"Do you still love her?" "Of course I still love her!" Xena exclaimed, bringing her head up quickly. "What kind of question is that?" "Sorry, I just…well, you know I don't know anything about women in that way or being married or anything. Hades, I count myself lucky that I can get laid once or twice a season," the Amazon said dryly. "It's just that…well, you know…I get kinda protective when it comes to Gabrielle." "I never would have noticed," Xena said. The warrior grinned over at the Amazon and Eponin felt embarrassed enough to lower her head to stare into the flames of the fire. Xena realized something that she forgot on occasion. The fact that Gabrielle not only had loyal subjects in her Amazons, but that more than a few of them were enamored of her lovely wife. It helped that Gabrielle never had eyes for anyone other than the Warrior Princess, but Xena knew that if anything ever happened to her, Gabrielle would never lack for a suitable mate. The warrior shook that thought from her head. "I know you care for her, Ep, I do too. Trust me when I say I need this time. I wouldn't be any good to Gabrielle, in fact I feel like I would have done more harm than good if I stayed with her in the village." Eponin nodded her head. If the Amazon didn't completely understand her friend's reasoning; it was apparent that Xena was struggling from within over it. She'd never known the warrior to make a decision in haste. Xena most definitely had the look of a tortured woman on her face. "Hey," the Amazon said quietly. "I'll be here when you want to talk, Xena." "Thanks, Ep." Xena offered up a small smile in relief. "Well, I can still think of a reason you should have stayed back in the village," the Amazon said seriously, lying back on her blanket.
"What?" Xena tensed for her friend's next words. "You snore so damn loud, you're liable to scare away all the game," Eponin said matter of factly. Xena stood and nudged her boot at the prone woman's backside. "I do not snore!" Xena said. The warrior walked away, content that she at least had things settled a bit with Eponin. The warrior in her hated these kinds of emotional confrontations, preferring to settle things with as little talk as possible. Gabrielle did the sensitive chats. She thought of her wife and the first time Xena broached the subject of sensitive chats with Gabrielle. The warrior lay back upon her own blanket, staring in to the sky. She smiled into the dark as her mind's eye filled with the vision of Gabrielle, thinking Xena quite mad, just as the flying parchment fell from the sky and nailed the young woman. The warrior chuckled aloud, looking at the stars, just as she and Gabrielle did every night when it was warm enough to camp out of doors. Up before sunrise, it turned out to be a long day for the young hunters. By midday, some of the younger ones were lying in their bedrolls, exhausted. A couple of the older Amazons took down an elk apiece, putting everyone in a good mood. At least they were in the right spot and the rumors of the elk herd were true. Xena was able to keep her mind busy, teaching the younger girls the subtle nuances of tracking, the kind of things that took more than skill. She taught them that technique and skill would take you far, but natural ability and your own instincts would carry home the prize. The warrior watched the girls work together within her small group. More often than not, Sali, a tall, hulking young girl, became the butt of their jokes. At first, Xena thought the silent girl slow witted, never having interacted with her before. Sali would simply smile slightly and lower her head in embarrassment at the other girls' attempts to humiliate her. Xena shook
her head, keeping a protective eye on the tall Amazon. It turned out, however, Sali needed little help in tracking, and she was already an above average hunter for a girl her age. It still saddened the warrior, always amazed at the ways people could be cruel to one another. So, besides being a teacher, Xena felt like she'd suddenly become a mother too. No matter what the dark-haired woman said to the girls, no matter how many times she explained, she couldn't get the students to call her by name. She now knew how embarrassed and frustrated her wife became at being called ‘Your Highness' all day. Given her babysitting chores for the day, Xena was exhausted when her body hit her bedroll. The warrior who single-handedly held off the Persian army was coming close to defeat at the hands of seven wide-eyed, not-so-very innocent Amazons. A few girls giggled and whispered in the darkness of night. "I am waking you before sunrise tomorrow, so I advise you all to close your eyes!" Xena said to no one in particular. The warrior heard Eponin's muffled laughter. Xena simply rolled over, muttering words about the difference between glorified babysitters and hunters. It was a long time before sleep finally claimed the Warrior Princess. Her dreams were filled of unsettling visions and her heart was filled with a disturbing feeling of dread for her wife. * * *
"All right, you've each received your instructions from Eponin," Xena went over the directions for the day's exercise, one more time. "Your Highness, perhaps you should go over it one more time," a young student asked sweetly. "I mean, for Sali's sake…she never gets things the first time around."
Muffled laughter filtered around the group. Xena watched as Sali lowered her head, seemingly enthralled with the dust on her boots. "Perhaps you should keep your mind on your own map, Talissa. You worry about yourself and let me do the worrying for the rest of the group," Xena said in a tightly controlled voice. The warrior had to keep reminding herself that these were students, but her temper was understandably short these days. "Choose partners and head out in the direction your map indicates. Collect all the information required by your map and return to the camp by nightfall. It's going to be a long day and this is no contest, so take your time and be careful," Xena instructed. The young students were embarking on a daylong journey through the woods, in an area that few of them ever traveled before. They weren't aware of the fact that the older Amazons were taking time out from the hunt to keep an eye on the younger girls. ‘Watch without being seen' was Xena's directive, step in only when injury or illness threatens. It would be one of the few chances the girls would have, to lose themselves in the wildness of the forest, while still being this protected by their elders. "Your Highness, we're a person short." Talissa said, standing before Xena. "You could be my partner, though." Xena was becoming more and more certain, that Talissa probably wasn't known as the nicest girl in her class. She was manipulative and unkind, two things Xena couldn't tolerate. "Sorry, kid, but Sali already asked me to be her partner." "What? Her?" the girl exclaimed, as if offended. Sali looked as surprised as the other girls in the group did. "Me?" she asked Xena with surprise. "Let's go," Xena said. "Everyone, remember to be back by nightfall."
Xena walked off with a stunned Sali by her side. Once they were out of earshot of the rest of the group, Xena looked down at the girl, who wasn't that much shorter than she was. "Have you got your map? You'll do most of the work, but I'll point you in the right direction." "Oh, yes. It's right here, your Highness," Sali said, unrolling the parchment she'd received. Xena stopped her movement and put an arm around the young girl's shoulder. "Okay, kiddo, here's the deal…you will earn major points with me by calling me Xena, instead of my title, okay?" "But, your Hi--I mean, Xena," the girl quickly recovered, "my mother said I must always treat you and the Queen with respect, that I should always use your titles. She said it would be disrespectful to address you any other way." Xena sighed. It was going to be difficult to challenge a mother. "And your mother is teaching you properly, I admire that," she responded as they walked along a slightly beaten down animal trail. "What do you call my wife, when you see her?" "I say, ‘hello, Queen Gabrielle' or I call her, ‘your Majesty,' just like mom said." "Uh huh. And what does Gabrielle do when she hears that?" Xena asked. Sali giggled. "She rolls her eyes a lot." "Do you know why we act like that?" Sali shook her head back and forth. "Because we don't really expect our friends to use our titles. Friends should only have to use our names…kind of casual like." Xena answered the young girl.
"Do you mean me? That I'm your friend?" Sali asked in wonder. Xena felt a twinge of sorrow for the girl. Somewhere along the line, her height had made her an outcast, an easy target for childish teasing and pranks. She acted as if she didn't know what it was like to have friends. "Yea," she answered with a smile. "That's just what I mean. Are you interested?" "Yes!" Sali answered quickly. The youngster never had anyone ask her to be a friend, especially not someone like the Warrior Princess. "The Queen, too? Would she be my friend?" "Absolutely," Xena chuckled. "Come one…show me how well you can read a map." "All right, Xena," Sali replied happily. The girl was better than Xena thought she'd be, leading them to the exact spots marked on the parchment. Sali occasionally stopped to mark down on her parchment the tracks she spied or the important plants and herbs that certain animals fed on. During their relatively silent trip through the forest, Xena noted the happy enthusiasm Sali put into everything she did. It reminded her of her bard. That's all it took for thoughts of her wife to consume the warrior. Unfortunately for every happy memory she shared with the young Queen, two more unhappy ones popped into her head. Her mind battled back and forth, even through the time when she and Sali rested and had a bite to eat. Xena felt her head and her heart torn into two different directions, lost in her own thoughts until Sali's voice brought her to attention. "Xena, I've never seen tracks like this." The warrior looked down at Sali's hand, the girl's fingers spread out beside a paw print, embedded in the soft earth. The print dwarfed the girl's hand.
"It's big," Sali remarked. Xena spread her own large hand out, just covering the print. "Damn big." The warrior stood up, hands on her hips, scanning the area, tilting her head, listening to the sounds of the forest around them. She glanced down at the print again, noting, not only its size, but also the deep impression it made in the dirt. "It's a cat, one big, heavy cat from the looks of those prints," Xena said softly. "Sali, I think we better cut our afternoon short. We should get back to let the others know that we need to keep our guard up." "Okay, Xena," Sali replied, casting a frightened glance in the warrior's direction. "Don't worry, you'll have quite a tale to tell the other girls tonight." Xena gave the young girl's shoulder a squeeze and they made their way back down the same trail they came up. This wasn't anything new for Xena. She'd spent the last six years anticipating trouble and attacking it in such a manner as to protect Gabrielle. She was used to thinking of someone else beside herself in a dangerous situation, but for the last few seasons, Gabrielle had become a consummate warrior herself. It had been quite some time since Xena had to act as guardian or protector to a young woman who couldn't defend herself. The path widened out and Xena's senses went on full alert. She had that tingling along her spine that warned her of trouble. It was the same feeling she got when she felt she was being watched. She searched the trees around them, seeing nothing. Examining the path closer, she discovered more prints, these coming at them, as if something had been trailing along behind them. "Stop, Sali," Xena said in a low voice. The girl froze and Xena thanked the Gods for a well-trained Amazon
student. In addition, the warrior sent a silent thank you to the Amazons who instructed the girl. "You see these prints?" Xena asked. "See what direction they're facing?" Even as Sali nodded, realization dawned brightly. "They're coming up the trail, facing towards us, not like the others that moved away from us." "That's right. I have the feeling this cat was ahead of us on the trail and heard us. I think he circled back and was following us," Xena replied. "Do you think he means to make us dinner?" Xena was surprised at the calm in the girl's voice. "Not if I can help it." The warrior grinned at the girl, who grinned back. "Just tell me what to do, Xena." "I think he's out there, watching us. He could be crouched low or even up in the trees." Xena looked up, trying to see the sky past the dense canopy of trees. "He'll probably wait until the sun goes down and try to catch us outside of camp. He has the advantage in the dark." "Will we be able to make it back to camp before it's dark, especially if we have to go this slow just to keep track of him?" Sali asked. "No we won't." Xena looked up at the girl, trying to determine if this was the best course of action. All the concerns in the world didn't much matter, considering that they had no options left. It was the law of the forest out here; either hunt or be hunted. "The best defense is a good offense," Xena began. We're going to turn the table on this guy, but I'm going to need your help. Do you think you're up to the task?" "Yes, I am!" the girl stated clearly. Xena couldn't help but smile. The girl didn't make excuses or say, she
would try, she simply said she was up to the task. The Queen didn't know the diamond in the rough she had with this one. "How good are you with that thing…accuracy wise?" Xena indicated the bow slung across the young woman's back. "I can hit the center of a target from fifty yards," Sali replied proudly. "Good. If everything goes according to plan, you won't need it, but if something happens, I want you to let go one arrow and only one. Then I want you to jump into the nearest tree. We'll rig a rope so you're prepared for a fast lift off, but I want you to know something ahead of time. An arrow to the heart of a cat is usually enough to bring him down, but this is one big mother, you can tell by his paw print. It'll take two or three to knock him off his feet, but by that time, he usually has his paws on you." "What will you be doing?" "I'm going to try to lure him down the trail. If he's smart he'll take the big meal first, that's me," Xena winked. "When he thinks he has an easy kill, I'll slit his throat with a toss from this." Xena held up the chakram at her side. "Remember, Sali…If anything at all happens to me, shoot one arrow, and get in the tree. You can nail him from there, but it's best to play it safe and not be a tough guy. Okay?" "Okay, Xena." The girl nodded her head, suddenly licking dry lips. "Are you any good in the trees?" Xena asked, tossing the girl's tree harness over a high branch. "Yes. I just pull on this rope and it will lift me clear," the girl replied. "You'll do fine," the warrior said before heading up the trail the way they'd just come. "I believe in you." Even as Xena said the words, she knew why she did. They were the very words that she wished she was able to say to Gabrielle. No matter what.
That's what she promised her wife, but then she didn't keep her promise, did she? She wanted to see her wife's face again, simply to tell the small blonde that her warrior believed in her. Xena lifted her hand and tousled the girl's hair, turning and walking up the sparse trail. Sali watched as the warrior removed her dagger, lifting it and making a quick slice in her own hand. She held the hand away from her body and allowed the blood to flow from the wound, falling onto the ground below. Xena continued to walk away, pausing every twenty yards to allow the blood to drip from her hand. In no time at all, the warrior was out of view and the young Amazon stood alone, her back to a large tree, one arrow notched to her bow. * * *
Xena's keen hearing picked up the cat's low growl and could tell it was pacing in the underbrush. Suddenly the high-pitched scream of the cat echoed through the forest. Xena tilted her head slightly, trying to get a better fix on the animal's exact location. It must have been a trick of the dense forest. She heard the snapping of the underbrush as the cat roamed back and forth, just near the edge of the trail. The smart animal tried to resist being lured out into the open, but the smell of human blood on the path called to the beast. "Here, kitty-kitty," she whispered under her breath. Xena hid just off the path, knowing that all she had to do was wait for the animal to give in to its nature, following the scent of the blood. It was moving closer and eventually, she saw the cat slink out of the green growth of the forest. It was much smaller than she thought it would be and was tempted to allow the beast to live to hunt another day. The thought entered her brain too late, however, as the black cat sniffed at the drops of blood on the trail, catching the warrior's scent.
It took only heartbeats for the beast to cover the dozen paces that separated the two. He was in mid air when the blade of the chakram neatly sliced through his throat. The black cat lay still and unmoving when the warrior nudged it with the toe of her booted foot. She squinted down at the animal, much too small to have made the tracks she and Sali saw earlier. She nudged the beast again. "You couldn't possibly--" That's when she heard it. The yowl of a cat, farther down the trail, the way she'd just come…where she'd left Sali. Xena took off running, dodging trees and jumping over logs, moving as fast as she could. The warrior cursed herself, realizing that there were two animals, and the larger of the two was now bearing down on Sali. The howl of the cat sounded angry and frustrated. All at once, the animal's roar turned into a scream of pain. The warrior flipped herself into the clearing just as Sali's arrow imbedded itself deep within the huge beast's chest. It slowed the animal momentarily and the warrior prepared herself for an off balance chakram throw. She helplessly watched as the young Amazon disregarded the warrior's advice and calmly, without a trace of panic in her movements, notched a second arrow and let it fly. The cat stumbled and rolled as the second arrow hit its mark, but the creature rose and launched itself in the girl's direction. Xena was caught, unable to throw her weapon without taking the chance that it would ricochet into the girl in front of her. In the half of a heartbeat that this took, Sali had a third arrow sailing toward the massive beast. At the same time, Xena lunged, putting her body into the air. The warrior landed on the big cat's back, Xena, and the animal landing in the dirt at the terrified girl's feet. The cat wasn't dead, but gasped as a thin line of blood trickled from its nose. The warrior quickly grabbed the animal's head and twisted hard, ending its misery. "You okay?" Xena asked the girl. Sali nodded, sliding her back down the tree until she was in a sitting
position before the massive animal. "Wow," was all the girl could say. "Sorry I didn't get here sooner," Xena explained about the second cat, silently thanking Artemis for watching out for this young Amazon. "You remind me of my wife," Xena said, retrieving the waterskin and kneeling down to give the young girl a drink. What do you mean?" Sali looked perplexed. "She never does what I tell her to either." Xena grinned. "I know I was supposed to jump in the trees, but all of a sudden I thought that if he got this far, he must have hurt you. I just…I figured I didn't want him to get away with that." "Yea, well, don't feel too bad about it," Xena replied. "I never jumped into the trees when my brother told me to either," Xena finished with a knowing smile. The young Amazon moved to the large beast, running her fingers through the sleek coat, so black it shone blue in the waning light. Tears filled the girl's eyes as she examined the massive creature. "What a waste. Such a beautiful creature…it's a shame he couldn't have lived a longer life." Tears rolled down the girl's face and when she looked back up at Xena, she was smiling. "Do I really remind you of the Queen?" Sali obviously took the remark as a compliment. The warrior gazed upon the young girl with the skill of a seasoned warrior, yet the compassion of a grown woman. Xena thought of her wife more than once today, but Sali's actions were exactly what Gabrielle would do. "More than you know, my young friend…more than you know."
Sali smiled up at the warrior, honored at the comparison. "Hey, we're losing the light. We'll never get this beast down to the camp with just the two of us. How about building a fire and we'll skin them here? This one should make a rice winter robe." "I've never skinned anything this large before. I'm not sure how." "Come on, I'll show you," Xena answered. "We'll do a quick cutting now and finish the job in camp tomorrow." It took another three candlemarks before the two reached the base camp again. Eponin confided to Xena that if she hadn't been the one with Sali, the Amazon would have sent out a search party long ago. When the warrior rolled out the two skins, there were exclamations from around the camp, but when the Xena told them how Sali brought the largest cat down, they were astounded. Suddenly all the girls wanted to know this quiet girl, whom they'd teased and made fun of. Talissa was relegated to a back seat position and the youngster didn't care for that. Xena listened to the girls' conversations as she sat farther away, sipping on a warm mug of tea. "So, then what happened, Sali?" One of the girls asked. "Well, Xena told me--" It isn't respectful to call the Queen's consort, Xena," Talissa said with a superior smile. "Oh, but she told me to," Sali said in earnest. The poor girl never seemed to realize that Talissa was baiting her. This time, however, right beat might. "Xena said that friends don't have to use titles like that…she told me I should call her Xena." "She really told you she was your friend?" another youngster asked.
"Sure," Sali replied, "and the Queen too. She said I should call her Gabrielle." A collective sound of awe came from the group of girls and judging from the looks that Eponin and Xena exchanged, the warriors were having a difficult time keeping a straight face. Xena enjoyed the fact that she'd helped the young girl go from outcast to hero in a single day, but realized that it would have happened anyway. There were some people in the world that were destined to be thrust into the limelight, it just came a little slower for others. The warrior grabbed a towel and some soap, prepared to head to the river and wash the dirt and blood from her body. She couldn't resist playing her part, however, in Sali's little scenario. She rose and walked into the circle of youngsters, knowing what kind of an impression that would make. They were seated on logs around the fire and had to crane their necks high, in order to see the warrior's face. Their mouths tended to drop open a bit and Xena knew it was simply the armor and her physical stature that caused the young girls to view her in rather mythic proportions. "Sali," Xena said and the young Amazon jumped up, to stand before the warrior. "Exceptional work today," Xena said and offered her arm to the youngster. Sali grasped the warrior's forearm in the fashion she saw older Amazon's display their camaraderie. The young girl's mouth went dry and she mumbled, "thank you, Xena." Xena chuckled, as the other girls were awed into silence, the warrior walking away and heading off to her bath. * * *
The next day, Eponin split all the students into three groups. One group went with her for some weapon practice and drills and one went with the hunters, after more game. The final group stayed with Xena in camp, the warrior instructing them on the intricacies of skinning and preparing furs, using the cats from the previous night as examples. It was a dirty, messy job, but the girls enjoyed learning from the Warrior Princess, plus the warrior had a surprise for them at the end of the day. Xena found a small waterfall with only a ten or twelve foot drop. The pool the water cascaded into made for a wonderful swimming hole to clean the sight and smell of blood from them. The warrior demonstrated the fun they could have by quickly stripping off her armor and leathers and diving from the top of the falls. The group of youngsters quickly followed the darkhaired woman's example, and soon Xena lay in the warm sun, keeping a watchful eye on her charges, still cavorting in the water. It was an exhausting day and Xena lay in her bedroll as the campfire slowly burned away to embers, aware of why she was unable to sleep. She'd hunted and taught, worked damn hard throughout the entire day, but when her mind stopped focusing on the tasks meant to keep her busy, and she lay down to sleep, thoughts of her wife kept her awake. The warrior decided to quit fighting the elusive rest and left her blankets. Throwing another log on the fire and watching it finally spark to life, she gathered herself up and took a walk through the woods. She ended up at the top of a rise that looked down into the camp, only to find that someone beat her to the spot. "Is this hill taken or can anyone join in?" Xena said dryly. Sartori jumped a bit in surprise before recognizing the warrior's voice. "Xena…of course, please, sit." "I thought I was the only one that couldn't sleep at night," Xena commented, dropping to the ground beside the Healer. "I just don't sleep right when Adia's not beside me. I suppose you find that
silly," Sartori said. "Not at all," Xena answered, realizing she felt the same thing for her own wife. "It makes a lot of sense to me." "I'm sure she's doing fine, Xena." The warrior grinned. "So, now you're a mind reader, as well. Tell me…what am I thinking now?" Xena chuckled, placing her fingers on her temples. Sartori smiled slightly at the warrior's antics, but kept her serious expression. "That you shouldn't have left her in the first place." Xena suddenly lost her smile and she lowered her hands, folding them in her lap. "Well…you don't pull any punches when you read minds do you?" "I'm sorry, Xena, but you know, it doesn't take a seer to see that you're suffering too." "I don't think some people see that," Xena responded in a quiet voice. "I think that's so for a number of reasons. We're used to seeing you hide everything behind that warrior's mask. We get quite used to you taking it on the chin and always bouncing back…always being the strong one. Then of course, it seems that all of us seem to have a soft spot for Gabrielle. She's only a few seasons younger than I am, but she has some quality about her…almost as if she could be anyone's daughter. Because of that, we become very protective of her. However, like any caring parents, we tend to want to guard her from everything and when she suffers, we feel her pain as our own. It's very human of us to want to blame someone for her pain… you often tend to bear the brunt of that particular accusation." Sartori finished the explanation and Xena could only nod, unable to find the words to agree. "I'm having dreams at night. I didn't want to tell Gabrielle, she had enough to deal with," Xena carefully explained. "They're dreams full of doubt… doubt of Gabrielle…of how I feel about her. Tori, to you honestly think
Gabrielle could have done something, anything, to our baby?" Xena had tears in her eyes when she looked at the Healer, seated beside her. Sartori only saw the warrior reduced to this condition in situations involving Gabrielle, a testament to the strength of their bond. "No, Xena, I honestly don't believe it. Personally, I don't think Gabrielle could ever have done anything to your child, to harm it in any way. Professionally, I saw no evidence of anything out of the ordinary. It was simply unexplainable." Xena rubbed her face, trying to hold on to a notion that hung just on the fringes of her conscious mind, but the harder she tried, the more it faded into the dark recesses. "Xena, you need some sleep. You do no one any good in this shape, least of all yourself. Why don't you let me make you something that will help you sleep?" "I'll be all right," the warrior replied with a sigh. "I would hate to think what could have happened to you and Sali up there on the mountain if you were as tired as you are now. If your reflexes had been off the slightest bit…" Sartori trailed off. It was enough to get at Xena. The warrior rarely did things for herself, but the Healer played the dark-haired woman correctly, prodding her at her weakest point…her need to care and protect others. "Yea, okay," Xena complied, "but not something that will drug me into incoherency." "I've been using something new that Adia brought back from the tribes up north. It's a plant named mazellia. As opposed to most of our sleeping mixtures, which affect your muscles and nerves to sedate you, mazellia acts directly on the brain. It won't cause you to sleep for any more hours than you usually do, but it will block out any thoughts from outside of your
conscious mind. Simply meaning, you won't dream about things rolling around in your subconscious. I know Adia was going to start using it on Gabrielle in a day or two, if the Queen's dreams continued." "That sounds great, Tori, thanks…for everything." "No thanks necessary, Xena. You and Gabrielle are like family to us. Remember that you never have to go through pain alone. Come one," Sartori said, rising to her feet, "let's get that tea for you." * * *
By the time Xena sipped the hot tea, which tasted oddly of celery, she was already feeling its effects. The warrior fought it off for a while, enjoying the sudden clarity with which she was able to think of her wife. Gone were the doubts and the fears that plagued her mind for the past week. All she could think of was how nonsensical her petty thoughts were and how terrible she'd treated Gabrielle, running off as if she believed that Gabrielle was actually capable of hurting anyone. Xena thought only of Gabrielle and how precious the Queen had become to Xena; how important the young woman came to be over the seasons, cradled protectively inside the warrior's heart. "I do love you, Gabrielle…" Xena whispered, just as sleep claimed her. Xena proved Sartori wrong. She did indeed dream, but the visions in her mind's eye, were ones that came from her own heart and not any outside source. A smile broke across the sleeping warrior's face, seeing Gabrielle in her dreams, that first night… * * *
"I was gonna follow you, until you were in some jam. It's so cold out there, and I couldn't get a fire started, and the mosquitoes are as big as eagles." "You know, I'm sending you home in the morning." "I won't stay home. I don't belong there, Xena. I'm not the little girl that my parents wanted me to be. * * *
"Gabrielle-- I want you to understand something. We both have families we were born into, but sometimes families change, and we have to build our own. For me, our friendship binds us closer than blood ever could." * * *
"I thought you had a pony when you were young." "I did. His name was Tympani." "Did you leave Tympani with your sister?" "No-- actually-- he got very sick one day, and-- I thought he would get better, but-- it's just what happens with things that you love. Sometimes they just leave you." * * *
"Watch out for a man with a double-edged sword." "What?" "I had a dream-- and he came through the roof. Just be careful." "Always looking out for me, huh?" "Always. Xena? About Chin…I hope you know I never meant to hurt you. I only did what I thought was right." "Gabrielle, that's all in the past. All I want is to be with you right now. You're my best friend…my family. I love you, Gabrielle." "I love you, Xena." "Till the other side, then…we'll be together." "Till then." * * *
"A long time ago, I accepted the consequences of our life together…that it might one day come to this. It has. I'm not afraid." "You always said that I was the brave one. Look at you now. If this is to be our destiny, let's see it out together. Even in death, Gabrielle—I will never leave you." * * *
"No! Hope!" Gabrielle screamed and Xena watched as the young woman flung herself at her daughter. "Ahhhhhhh! Gabrielle!" "Xenaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" "Gab--" She could hear Callisto's cackling laughter. "I never thought I'd feel so good again! Seeing poor, dear Gabrielle sacrifice herself makes it all worthwhile. It finally gives me a reason…for living, and I have you to thank for it, Xena!" "Ahhhhhhh!" Xena screamed, turning to plunge the Hind's dagger into her enemy. "No more living for you." * * *
"Gabrielle!" Xena cried out breathlessly. The warrior grabbed her sword and leapt up from her blankets in one swift move. The closest Amazons, including Eponin, were on their feet in an instant at the warrior's cry. Most of them realized that it was a dream that startled the warrior into the waking world, but Eponin and Sartori were there at her side to calm Xena within moments. "Xena?" Eponin gave her a questioning look. "Gabrielle…something's happening to Gabrielle," Xena rasped. The
warrior began grabbing her belongings and stuffing them into her saddlebags. "I have to go back." The Amazon took in the wild-eyed expression on her friend's face, but she also understood the bond that the two shared. "Okay, Xena, give me a minute, we'll all go back. If Gabrielle is in trouble, then we're all needed back at the village." "There's not enough time…it will take too long. I can't believe I didn't see it before." "Xena, what can we do to help?" the Healer asked. "Sartori, what you said to me last night about Gabrielle," Xena paused for a moment. " When you said what happened when she lost the baby was unexplainable…" "I'm sorry that I didn't have time to talk to you about this before things started going a bit wild back in the village, Xena, but there wasn't anything to indicate why she lost that baby. If a woman is injured, or suffers a strain of some sort, there would be a tear, some type of explainable reason as to why she was bleeding. In Gabrielle's case, it appeared as if it was almost spontaneous. That girl bled, nearly to the point of death, yet I couldn't see any point of origin…there was simply no reason for it. It was almost as if…" "Someone made it happen," Xena finished in a low, ominous tone. "Yes…" Sartori whispered her answer. She was afraid to mention it before, fearing she could be wrong, but the longer she thought on it, over the last few days, the more convinced she was that she was right, that Godly intervention was the cause. "Someone did and I think whoever it was has been planting these dreams that Gabrielle and I have been having. They've found a way to work around Morpheus, either that or he's switched sides. They've been planting ideas and thoughts in our head that we wouldn't normally accept. Like the notion that Gabrielle could have killed our baby," Xena finished.
"You actually believed that Gabrielle did that?" Eponin asked with a hard edge to her voice. "My heart didn't, but my head did," Xena explained. "Last night, the tea you gave me," Xena motioned to Sartori. "You said it blocked thoughts from outside our body, well it works because for the first time in a week, I had true thoughts about Gabrielle…dreamed real dreams." "So, what does all this mean, Xena?" Eponin voiced the question that she and Sartori both wanted an answer to. "One of the Gods killed your baby… why?" "I don't know, but I'll tell you one thing, there won't be a safe enough place for the Olympians to hide once I find out who did it," Xena hissed. By this time, Xena was saddling Argo as she spoke. "If they're still playing with our dreams, causing us to doubt our commitment to one another, then they aren't satisfied yet. I don't want to think about what Gabrielle might try to do if they keep at her this way. I just hope Adia used the same tea on her." "I'll go with you," Eponin stated, tossing her own horse's saddle on the mare's back. "I'll wake everyone else," Sartori looked about the camp as adults and children began to wake at the sounds the three were making. "We'll be on our way by first light and should reach the village by midday." Xena merely nodded her head and quickly squeezed the hand that the Healer offered. The warrior grabbed Argo's reins and the horse sped off into the night, followed by Eponin's brown mare. "Please get to her in time," Sartori whispered under her breath, praying that Xena arrived before Gabrielle had time to do anything the young Queen would regret.
* * *
"Well, we've lost her." The Mystic said. "I told you not to let anyone get near her with a sleeping draught. We've lost our link now." "Well, get it back!" Hera ordered. "Perhaps it will come as news to you, but I can't be everywhere at once!" she snapped. "Do you know how many moons it takes to develop that kind of connection? It's impossible to duplicate." Hera sat back in the large, throne-like chair. "There's nothing to be done about the warrior, then. No matter," she said suddenly, with a casual wave of her hand. "Our little runaway Queen has quite a lead on Xena. As long as that blonde slut continues to feel as though she is undeserving of life, she'll keep running." Hera smiled an evil smile that turned her pale blue eyes a translucent, colorless hue. "And as long as Gabrielle keeps running, my revenge against the Warrior Princess grows closer and closer to its completion." The Goddess' laughter echoed through the halls of her Olympian chamber.
CHAPTER 11
GABRIELLE ENTERED THE smoky tavern, stiffening herself against the odor of stale sweat and sour ale that assaulted her nostrils. Here in Pella,
there were three areas to the capital city of Macedon. The extremely wealthy section, the middle class, and the ne'er do well's area. The small blonde chose the end of town where only the most destitute or those wanted by the law congregated. It was part of her plan to do everything the opposite of what Xena would think her to do. It would throw the warrior off, if and when she came searching for Gabrielle. It was early evening and Gabrielle had been walking or running for nearly twenty-four candlemarks. She was able to hitch a ride with a few farmers and a wealthy trader. She had to pull her hood far over her face, once she realized the trader who stopped his wagon to give her a lift, was the same man who just left the Amazon village. He sold a number of Thessalian horses, excellent stock, to the young Queen and her village. Gabrielle congratulated herself, once the man left her off near the crossroads at Timinus. He'd talked for three solid candlemarks and never realized to whom he was speaking. The small woman crossed the room, feeling the weight of the stares that followed her into the tavern. She realized that must be how Xena felt whenever she walked into a room. The looks that were a combination of wonder, leering, and fearful. Gabrielle decided to play her part to the hilt. After all, when one has no regard for their life, it's easy to bandy it about. "A room for the night," Gabrielle asked the man serving drinks behind the counter. She set her voice lower than usual, imagining what her wife sounded like, speaking with just a hint of intimidation. The bartender looked over at the cloaked figure and watched as a beautiful woman pulled back the hood of the cloak. He grinned, but the smile froze on his face as soon as he met the green eyes. They stared back at him with an emotionless glint and he followed the length of her small body down to the floor to capture the sight of long dagger-like weapons protruding from each of her boots. He swallowed, smart enough to know that warriors came in all shapes and sizes…even genders. "That'll be six dinars," he said.
"Six!" Gabrielle responded before thinking. She knew that was highway robbery, but considering that's probably what half the current customers did for a living; she had no choice. The small blonde loved nothing better than a good haggle, but that would be the first thing Gabrielle would do. Completely opposite, she said to herself. "Yes…b-but that includes a hot meal." Gabrielle was tired, hungry, and her feet hurt something terrible. She arched an eyebrow and fixed the gaze on the young man. "For a little extra, I can see you get a hot bath…private…in your room, of course," he added nervously. "How much extra?" The words, hot bath, suddenly interested her. "Three more dinars." Gabrielle grumbled a bit as the young man showed her to a table and he ordered a serving girl to bring the blonde a plate of food. Gabrielle ordered mead, a drink she usually avoided, but was determined to carry out her vow to do things differently. The young man stood at the table, once he delivered her drink, apparently waiting for his pay. Gabrielle remembered Xena's words, to never allow anyone to see your money purse. Keeping that in mind, she slipped a hand inside her cloak, reaching into her bag of dinars, she pulled out the appropriate amount. She dropped the coins into the man's hand and watched as he examined the money. She held her breath as his gaze went from the coin, then back to her again. "Amazonian dinars…" he said thoughtfully. "Silver is silver, isn't it?" "Oh, sure…it's just that we don't see too many of these down here anymore."
Gabrielle gave the man a disarming smile. "I just sold a sizeable herd of Thessalian horses to an Amazon village." "Ahh, yes, I heard tell of a big herd of horses moving from down south. Funny," he grinned nervously as he glanced at the coin once more. "She looks kinda like you," the young man referred to the embossed image on the coin. Gabrielle's smile was beginning to cause the young man to blush. "Can I help it if one good-looking girl looks pretty much like another?" she lied about the one thing she forgot. It was Gabrielle's own image on the silver coin. The young man laughed. "Corlis!" Get over here boy and leave the warrior be!" an older man shouted from behind the bar. The young man excused himself quickly and left Gabrielle to her meal. * * *
Gabrielle leaned her back against the wall, taking in the assortment of characters inside the busy tavern. She sat in the back, beside the kitchen door, sipping on her second mug of mead. The heavy meal, the warm fire, and the drink, all combined to put her in an easy, relaxed state; something she hadn't felt in quite some time. A woman walked into the tavern, a quiet baby in her arms, a small child hiding behind her skirt. The woman appeared timid and afraid, but there was a certain look of determination in her eyes. Gabrielle watched as the woman bravely approached the older man that tended bar beside the younger one, who first greeted Gabrielle. The small blonde noticed more than mere determination in the woman's gaze. It was almost a fierce, yet
silent desperation. "Excuse me, sir. Would you have a room for the night, something I could work in exchange for? I can cook, clean, or serve," she explained with a hopeful look. "Just gave away the last room. You can bed in the stable if there's an empty stall," the older man said gruffly. As the woman nodded and turned away, he called back to her. "Look, if you want a hot meal, I'll give you enough for you and the kid. Got a tubful of dishes in the kitchen that need washin'." "Thank you, sir," the woman said and Gabrielle continued to watch until the woman passed her, to walk into the kitchen. As the woman moved past, Gabrielle felt that the stranger was probably many seasons younger than her physical appearance indicated. She stared at Gabrielle, pulling her child along by the hand. The small blonde simply stared at the small bundle in the strange woman's arms. The stranger paused at Gabrielle's stare, unconsciously pulling her children closer to her. Gabrielle sighed deeply and got up from her seat, approaching the older man at the bar. "Give that woman my room," she said shortly. "You crazy?" Gabrielle had to stand on her tiptoes to do it, but she grabbed the neck of the man's shirt, pulling him hard down to the bar. The smaller woman had surprise on her side; that and the fact that she was in no mood for an argument at this point in the evening. "I am going to sleep in that spot in the stable," Gabrielle hissed. "You are to tell the woman that, out of the goodness of your heart, she doesn't have to cook or clean your miserable dishes." Gabrielle flipped another few
dinars onto the wooden counter. "This is for her food. I'll be here all night. If I find out that the woman didn't get the room…or the hot bath I paid for, I'll be back to discuss this further with you. Do you understand?" The muscles in Gabrielle's arm stood out against the tight leather of her sleeve and the portly man could only nod, the small woman's surprising strength holding his face down to her level. Gabrielle shoved the man back slightly and walked from the tavern, a number of admiring eyes following the small warrior in the dark cloak. * * *
Gabrielle had slept in worse places by far. Actually, she experienced a pang of lonesome homesickness, lying on the soft, dry hay in the stable's loft. She remembered the times she and her sister, Lila, spent the hot summer evenings sleeping in the loft of the barn in Potidaea. Her reminiscing turned painful when she thought about the nights she and Xena would have been more than grateful for a nice dry stall sleep in. She shook off the waves of anguish that threatened to overwhelm her. She could no longer afford to feel sorry for herself, breaking down into tears at the slightest provocation. She was out in a world where human frailties were considered a weakness. There was no one to protect her from those who were stronger or smarter. She was on her own and the only way to stay alive was to keep up your guard. With that thought rolling through her brain, the young Queen fell into an exhausted slumber. For the first time in her life, Gabrielle slept lightly, knowing she was the only thing to stand between danger and herself. She surprised herself by waking just before dawn the following morning. Actually, the sky was a rather predawn gray and seemed to stay that way for the longest time. Gabrielle was up and washed before the sun eventually made it's way into the sky. The Queen couldn't help wondering what her father would be doing, allowing so much time to lapse before he piloted his chariot across the sky.
Gabrielle had a thought just before she fell asleep the previous evening. It was an idea, although she wasn't sure it was the smartest idea she'd ever had, but it was a plan, and it most certainly was the opposite of what Gabrielle would ever do. "I need to purchase a mount," she said to the man who walked into the stable that morning. The grizzled looking man rubbed his hand over a few days worth of beard growth as he appraised the small figure in front of him. She was a tiny thing, but he'd lived in this part of Greece long enough to know that size didn't count for much. He'd seen smart warriors live a heck of a lot longer than the big, dumb beefy ones. "Heard you sold a herd up at the Amazon village?" he asked. "Word travels quick around here," Gabrielle responded warily. "That ain't the half of it. Guess I was wonderin' what happened to your own mount if you brought a herd up from Thessaly." The man made a good point, but Gabrielle was finding that she was becoming a quick thinker, or liar, however you wanted to look at it. "I sold him, too. Hey, I saw the money the Amazons were offering for Thessalian horseflesh," Gabrielle grinned sheepishly, "guess my greed got the better of me." The man laughed loudly. It appeared that Gabrielle came up with a concept that the old man could understand. "Let's walk out to the corral. I'll show ya what I got." Gabrielle took one step and looked down at her boot. The soft mud she thought she stepped in was something else entirely. "Lovely," she whispered. "What a nice way to start the day."
The old man laughed again, slapping Gabrielle on the back as he passed. "If it's brown and it's warm, it ain't mud!" He continued laughing as Gabrielle followed along, rolling her eyes. Note to self, stable hands have an odd sense of humor! Gabrielle kept the last thought to herself. They walked up to the corral where a couple of patrons from the tavern were already haggling over a scrawny looking mare. "Now this one here is nice and gentle, she--" "That one. How much?" Gabrielle asked, pointing her finger to the far side of the fenced in area. "Are you insane?" "How much?" Gabrielle insisted. "You do know that's a stallion, don't ya? He ain't no ridin' in the country animal, he's a warhorse, and as wild an' unbroke as they come." "How big do you think he is?" Gabrielle asked the man, quietly reevaluating the insane notion. I'd say 15 hands to his back would be a fair guess," he answered. The old man looked at Gabrielle, waiting to see if he'd misjudged her. Gabrielle swallowed hard. She decided she needed a horse to help her put some distance between her and her home. Gabrielle would definitely choose the gentle mare, and anyone asking after her would certainly be told that a short blonde bought the most timid animal of the lot, and they would immediately know that the buyer was Gabrielle. Completely opposite, she repeated. The snow-white stallion reared up on its hind legs and kicked the fence nearby where the men from the tavern were dealing. They scrambled out of the way, throwing curses toward the beast.
"Oh, yea…this is turning out to be a great day," Gabrielle muttered. "Name your price…with a saddle," Gabrielle added pointedly, and she and the old man shook on it. It took three men to get a bridle and saddle on the wild horse, but they each held a noose around the stallion's neck as Gabrielle approached. The horse eyed her warily as she stepped up, the animal's muscles jumping and quivering with anticipation. It snorted air through its nostrils and to the small woman; it may as well have been fire. Gabrielle gingerly took the reins, the horse pawed at the ground with his front hoof when she placed a hand against the saddle. Xena taught Gabrielle to ride, but she never considered doing anything this crazy. Gabrielle knew the Thessalian secret to breaking horses, but she'd never practiced it. She was seriously wondering if it was truth or just a rumor she'd gleaned from a drunken centaur. The Queen caught the men from the tavern out of the corner of her eye. They added a few more to their number in the last few moments and she watched as three more showed up. They exchanged handshakes and began tossing money in a pile, and she suddenly realized they were betting on her little situation. She was rather curious as to whether they were betting on her or the horse. The old man stood behind her and laced his fingers together to give her a leg up. "As soon as your ass hits the saddle, they drop the ropes," he said in warning. Gabrielle nodded her head and took a deep breath. Well, this is about as
opposite as you can get, old girl. Gabrielle took the hand up and the instant she hit the saddle, she tucked both feet into the stirrups. The men dropped the ropes and scrambled for the fence. There must have been a dozen gamblers around the corral now. There was only one problem with it all…the horse wouldn't move.
The animal looked at the men scrambling over the fences as though he didn't even know anyone sat astride him yet. The long white neck turned and the animal was very nearly eye-to-eye with the Queen. Gabrielle thought if it hadn't been so damned dangerous, the stallion's antics would actually be laughable. She thought that for all of three heartbeats, because that's how long it took the animal to realize she was there. "Hey, there," she murmured nervously to the horse. She didn't know it was possible for a horse to jump straight into the air. She certainly never saw Argo do that. She did a good job of hanging on while the animal was airborne, but the minute the streak of lightning hit the ground, the Queen, and the saddle parted company. She even fancied she heard one of the men saying that he didn't know a woman could fly straight up into the air like that. Of course, in the young Queen's mind, the flying part wasn't so bad. It was when she landed in the dirt, and assorted other soft piles of things she would rather not mention, that her day started getting worse. She looked up from her position on the ground, flat on her back and swore the horse was laughing as loudly as the men watching the display were. "Well, this day just keeps getting better and better," Gabrielle got up slowly, wiping a foul smelling mess off her sleeve. That's when she heard it. "Hey, little darlin'," one of the tavern patrons called out. "If you're lookin' for somethin' to mount, I'll give you a ride that'll be a lot safer!" "Get him back over here!" Gabrielle said coldly and the stable hands were quick to comply. The whole routine was about to begin again, but this time Gabrielle wasn't going to waste time. She would have to put her plan into action the moment she hit the saddle. She took a deep breath, just like the last time. If this trick didn't work, she was silently reminding herself to go back to that bar in Athens, where she waited all afternoon for Xena, and castrate a certain drunken centaur.
The stallion was waiting around this time. The moment he felt Gabrielle's weight, slight as it was, he was airborne. The Queen didn't waste her opportunity either. She felt herself rising from the saddle and leaned over the beast's neck, quickly grasping one of the animal's ears. She lowered her head further and bit into the horse's ear. It wasn't a little nip, but a fullfledged bite. Gabrielle wondered if she went too far when she felt her own teeth, bite into each other. The stallion came straight to earth on all four legs. It let out a neigh, that while it wasn't a scream, it was the highest pitched sound Gabrielle ever heard come from a horse's throat. The animal stood stock still, quivering from tip to tail, sort of like a dog, shaking the water from its coat. The animal pawed the ground once and snorted, shaking his mane back and forth. Gabrielle composed herself, listening to the deafening silence around her, a smug smile appearing unbidden on her lips. She clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth and tested the stallion against the rein. He did exactly what his mistress bid, but the look in his eye indicated he wasn't sure why. Suddenly the noise began and men started laughing, talking, and arguing all at once. The amazed and the ones who said they knew she could do it, all congratulated the small blonde. Gabrielle thanked the well-wishers, doing her best to slink away in the ensuing commotion. The last thing she needed was talk of a small blonde who tamed a fierce stallion. Although, the more she thought about it, the more she realized that Xena and the Amazons would never take the character in the legend these men were about to spread, for their Gabrielle. She dismounted and led the huge stallion from the corral. "I never would have believed it, if I hadn't of seen if fer myself!" the old man exclaimed, almost to himself, as Gabrielle left the stable. * * *
Gabrielle made her way through the end of town, managing to ignore the stares of those who simply had to do a double take at the tiny woman on the huge stallion's back. She started past the maze of market vendors and she paused her horse when she saw the woman from last night. She watched as the young woman gave her small daughter a hard chunk of bread to chew on and tucked the young girl into the top of a wagon, loaded with household and personal belongings. The woman looked into a bundle of moving cloth beside the girl, smiling as she adjusted the objects around the baby to protect her on all sides. The youngster appeared to be three or four summers, judging by her height. She gnawed on the piece of bread, distracted by the sites and sounds from the market. "Ooh, mama…look at the sweets there." The young girl pointed in Gabrielle's direction. When Gabrielle pulled even with the wagon, the woman was on the other side, securing the harness that held the roan mare pulling the old wagon. The youngster looked at the blonde and smiled broadly. "I remember you," she said. "From last night." Gabrielle enjoyed the way the easy smile transformed the little blondehaired girl's face into a small bundle of sunshine. What captured the Queen completely were the incredible green eyes that made her feel as if she were looking at her own image. "I remember you, too," Gabrielle replied. "Wanna bite?" the girl asked, holding her bread out to the Queen. Gabrielle chuckled. "No, but thank you. I don't think I'll have any breakfast this morning."
"Oh," the girl responded seriously, "you don't have money for food neither, huh?" Gabrielle's heart broke at the words and the expression on the child's face. Just then, the girl's mother climbed aboard the front of the wagon, and when she looked back to her children, she met Gabrielle's eyes. The young Queen saw another mirror image in the woman's face. Pain and unhappiness made themselves known from within the stranger's carefully guarded features. The woman pulled back at Gabrielle's attempt to draw the stranger in with a smile. "Good morning," the small blonde finally said. "Tai, don't bother the warrior," the woman said and snapped the reins on the horse's back. She steered the wagon clear of the growing throng of people visiting the market and left. The young girl waved a tiny hand at Gabrielle and the young woman found herself repeating the action. Gabrielle noted the wagon taking the same road she would be using, since it was the least traveled path into Thrace. The Queen visited a few of the food vendors and bought more food than she would be able to eat in days. She tied the sack onto her horse's saddle and looked back toward the booth that had so captured the young girl's attention. She smiled at her horse and patted his neck. The white stallion snorted a bit in response. "Yea, I know," Gabrielle said to her mount. "I shouldn't, but I'm a sucker." The Queen walked over to the vendor and when she returned, she tucked the small sack into the larger one on the saddle. It was a good thing she worked with a staff and built up her upper body strength, she told herself. Mounting her horse again was an athletic feat, considering his back was about as high as the top of her head. She was actually starting to get the hang of jumping up and pulling her body onto the beast's back.
It was a good two candlemarks later by the time the small blonde had the blacksmith fashion a new set of shoes for her horse, and she was traveling down the quiet road. Most of the roads to Pella were non-stop traffic, but Gabrielle knew that roads like this, in poor condition, or used by farmers for cattle and sheep, were the most likely route for someone trying to stay out of the flow of the city. There was just one real drawback to that fact and as she spied the woman's wagon up ahead of her, she saw four of them surrounding the woman and her children. Trail thieves were always common, but you took your chances when you traveled the back roads. They knew the people who used the out-of-theway side roads, usually had something to hide themselves, therefore they were the least likely to report the bandits. They all looked up as Gabrielle strolled in on the huge white stallion, stopping beside the wagon. She acted as if she hadn't a clue as to what was going on. "Nice day, isn't it?" Gabrielle commented to the men, cheerily. "Think we'll get any rain?" she asked, looking into the sky. One of the young men on the ground in front of her followed her eyes, looking up into the sky. The man next to him slapped him in the head; he was obviously the leader of the group. Gabrielle lifted her leg over her horse's neck and jumped to the ground, landing in front of the men. The leader eyed her stature, and then followed her body down to the weapons in her boots. "What do you want?" he asked suspiciously. "My friends were waiting her for me to catch up with them," Gabrielle offered, keeping a hand on the stallion's rump as she spoke. "No they weren't, we stopped ‘em," the first young man replied, only to be slapped in the head again by his friend. "I see," Gabrielle began.
Two of the four men began to sidle their way behind the small blonde. The white stallion neighed and shook his head back and forth. "That horse of yer's is a might skittish," the leader said, drawing his sword and taking a step forward. Gabrielle reached for her sais and easily flipped them over so the handles were in her grasp, the shafts tucked against the inside of her forearms. "I guess he just doesn't like anyone behind him," the Queen said. Without moving her eyes, she saw the shadow the man moving up behind her, cast on the ground ahead of her. "Neither do I," Gabrielle finished ominously. Reaching out quickly with her left hand, Gabrielle placed a gentle, yet well placed jab into her horse's rear flank. The stallion knew exactly what the young woman was thinking because he kicked out with both of his rear legs, striking each man and causing them to sail a good 10 feet away. The Queen stepped into action, easily knocking out the first man in front of her. She knocked aside a few blows from the leader's sword, waiting for her opening. It came and she took advantage, rendering the tall man unconscious with a shocking uppercut to the jaw. By the time Gabrielle looked at the four, very unconscious men, the young girl that the woman called, Tai, was jumping up and down in the back of the wagon. "Wow, mama did you see that…did you see that?" she giggled with glee. "You better start off and put as much distance as you can between you and these guys before they wake up," Gabrielle instructed the woman. "Oh, wait." The Queen turned back to her horse, patting him on the neck. "Good boy," she said softly. She grabbed the large sack of food and stood before the
woman. The woman eyed her with something more than wariness; almost fear. "I don't have any money…anything of value. You can look, but it's just personal stuff in the wagon, I promise. I just ask that you don't hurt my babies." "What?" Gabrielle asked in awe. "Do you think--look, I'm not like them. I'm not a thief, and I most certainly would never hurt your children. I…uhm, I have too much, she said, holding out the sack to the woman. "I hate to see it go to waste." When the woman wouldn't take the bag, Gabrielle laid it beside her in the wagon. "Look, I know you don't have to believe me, but I really am a nice person. I just--" Gabrielle turned her head sharply at the sound of the baby crying, tears filling the Queen's eyes at the natural response. "I just thought that maybe since we seem to be headed the same way, we might travel together for a while. As you can see," Gabrielle offered a small smile, waving her hands around her. "I can come in rather handy at times." For the first time the woman smiled and Gabrielle thought it made all the difference to her appearance. "Well, I have to admit, you're right there. I do thank you for the protection… and yes, we'd be happy for you to keep us company for a spell." "Great," Gabrielle jumped up on the stallion's back and rode beside the woman in the wagon. It was simply nice to have someone to talk to again. "Just one thing, warrior," the stranger said. Gabrielle looked up, waiting for the other shoe to drop. "Someone should have told you, but…well, you smell pretty bad," she said to Gabrielle. The Queen's entire face flushed scarlet. "I…uhm…" Gabrielle looked down
at her clothes, unwilling to think about what the stuff was that had dried and caked on her leather shirt and trousers. "I had an accident. I'll wash them, and me, as soon as we stop." "Es okay," Tai said, listening from her spot in the wagon. "That happens to me sometimes, too." "Thanks," Gabrielle said, fighting off a grin, simply happy for some human company.
CHAPTER 12
"…DEN I TURNED OVER, and wham! I knocked the big monster down…and den I--" "Tai! Honey," the woman said to the bundle of non-stop energy in the back of the wagon. "Why don't you take a nap, sweetie?" "Not tired!" Tai answered, jumping up and down as Gabrielle turned her head to avoid having the child see the grin on her face. "See what I have? I'm gonna be a warrior someday, too!" She smiled brightly and pulled out a small wooden sword. "And how old are you, little warrior?" Gabrielle asked. The woman in the wagon didn't say much, her daughter carrying on the bulk of the conversation with Gabrielle. The Queen was rather desperate for a little talk, even if it was with a child. "This many." Tai held up her hand, extending all five fingers in Gabrielle's direction.
"Five summers?" The Queen asked in surprise. "Uh huh…and I'm gonna be a warrior, just like you!" Gabrielle blanched a little at that. I wonder if this is how Xena felt when I
tried to be like her? The stranger's voice broke into Gabrielle's musings. "She's small for her age. I've been telling her all her life that she was too small to be a warrior," she gave the Queen a slight smile. "Seeing someone like you, well I guess I'm going to have to let her have her dreams now." They were able to cover quite a bit of ground before the sun was high up in the sky. They traveled at something more than a leisurely pace, Gabrielle often wondering during the trip, what her new friends were running from.
Now you're letting that bard's imagination get the best of you. She may be in a hurry simply because she's running to someone! "Wus your name?" Tai asked a surprised Gabrielle. The small blonde never really thought about what she would say to anyone who would ask her name. "Brianna," she answered without thinking. "Pretty name," Tai answered. "Hey, my little warrior friend, are you hungry?" Gabrielle asked. The youngster looked up at Gabrielle hopefully, then over at her mother and shook her head back and forth. The woman reached out a hand to tousle her daughter's blonde hair, a sad smile on her face. The action pained Gabrielle. Too damn young, to have to do without. "It's okay. I have plenty of food," Gabrielle looked at Tai, then her mother.
"Look," she spoke to the woman driving the wagon. "I understand not wanting to be obligated to anyone, but lets just say the food is payment. I mean, you are letting me travel with you, after all." Gabrielle smiled, and when she did, most people had trouble refusing her anything. The stranger found that she could count herself among the many caught in the power of the small blonde's spell. "All right, it's a deal," the woman answered with a smile of her own. "I bet you're about ready for a break," Gabrielle told her. "Why don't we follow this creek into the trees and stop for a rest, and something to eat?" "I guess I could do with a walk around. Driving a wagon all day can be back breaking, that's for sure."' "Come on, up this way," Gabrielle led the way. "I promise I'll sit downwind until I can clean up." * * *
Gabrielle scrubbed her face and hands, removing her outer leather shirt, which had the worst of the corral muck on it. She would wait until they stopped for the night and wash her clothes, allowing them time to dry overnight. When the Queen returned to the wagon, she found Tai, fighting imaginary foes in the grass, and the woman, cradling the baby against her chest, as the infant fed greedily on the breast she clutched with tiny hands. Gabrielle paused a moment, fighting down the feelings of her own loss, as she watched the sight. The woman looked up and caught the expression on Gabrielle's face. The Queen tried to cover her momentary anguish with a smile. "She's big." Gabrielle stated the obvious.
"Yes, eight moons, now, and she just keeps getting bigger. I swear, she'll be as tall as this one is tiny," she indicated Tai, still battling her imaginary monsters, oblivious to her mother's softly spoken words. There was an awkward silence before Gabrielle turned and pounced on Tai. The girl giggled and screamed as she tried to squirm away from the small blonde. "Would you like to eat?" Gabrielle asked the girl in her arms. "Yes, please." Tai giggled again. "Okay, lets get you cleaned up first," Gabrielle replied, carrying the youngster down to the creek. The woman looked up with concern as the small blonde walked away with her daughter, but she watched as the usually shy and reticent young girl, put her arms around the blonde's neck and allowed herself to be carried to the water's edge. The woman kept her eyes on the pair the entire time, relaxing only when she saw them returning, hand in hand. By the time Gabrielle set out the food from the sack, the woman was just finishing changing the baby. The slender, dark-haired woman tried to hold the baby and see to it that Tai ate the food before her. Gabrielle watched as the woman attempted to do three things at once. "Here, let me hold the baby while you and Tai eat," Gabrielle offered. The woman appeared to want to trust Gabrielle, but there was something in her eye. It was a look of wariness, as if the stranger was still not convinced that Gabrielle meant her no harm. She had the air of someone who spent a long while building up a natural mistrust for people. Eventually, she conceded, and placed the large bundle in Gabrielle's arms. The stranger watched, as Gabrielle's eyes took on a haunted expression, looking down on the now sleeping baby. The woman's brow furrowed
together, still unable to ascertain whether the small warrior could be completely trusted or not. "She's so beautiful," the Queen said softly. "Just like you," she reached out and poked one finger at Tai's belly. The small girl laughed and scrambled closer to the small blonde. Having eaten her fill, a luxury Tai hadn't experienced in a fortnight, she laid her head against Gabrielle's thigh and promptly fell asleep. The young woman reached down a hand to gently stroke the girl's hair. Quickly pushing down the feelings that were rising insistently to the surface, Gabrielle laughed off the intense emotions that she couldn't erase from her face. "As bad as I smell, I can't believe she could fall asleep like that; so fast." "She's like that," the woman replied. "One minute she's running in circles, the next, she's curled up, sound asleep. She usually doesn't take to strangers so well, though." "Guess I just have that way with kids," Gabrielle smiled sadly. "Maybe it's because I'm not much bigger than they are," she added dryly. Gabrielle smiled down at the sleeping infant, tenderly brushing her fingertips across the baby's cheek. "What's her name?" "Emery," the woman answered. She took another bite of the bread in her hand, continuing to watch, and feel there was more to this small woman than she understood. "My name is Helen," she added, hesitating slightly. Gabrielle couldn't help it, looking down at the baby who grabbed one of the blonde's fingers and held on tightly. The young Queen's eyes misted over and she felt a single tear roll down her cheek. "You're a very lucky woman, Helen," Gabrielle responded hoarsely. The stranger examined the myriad of emotions that passed across the
young woman's features. She never expected tears from a warrior, but then again, she never met a warrior quite like this sensitive woman. The tears spoke volumes to the stranger, a silent message that communicated in a language that only another tortured heart would understand. "Brianna," the woman said to Gabrielle. "My name isn't Helen…it's Ella. Helen is my sister's name." Gabrielle never looked up at the woman, knowing what a step it was for Ella to put her trust in a stranger. The young Queen felt that she could do no less than reciprocate with the truth. "And my name isn't Brianna…it's Gabrielle," the Queen finally looked up into the relieved eyes of her new friend. "It's very nice to meet you, Ella," she smiled. Ella released a nervous laugh. "If only my sister knew that I've been using her name since we left Ambracia. So, Gabrielle, who is the real Brianna… your sister?" A pained look flashed across her features as Gabrielle prepared to speak. "No…I…it's not my sister." Gabrielle wasn't quite prepared to open up just yet, unsure of exactly what she could reveal about herself; what her heart would allow her to say, without breaking down completely. "It's a subject better spoken of later." Ella nodded in understanding. She could see the young woman suffered, and Ella definitely knew something of suffering. "Later," she agreed. "Perhaps we should get back on the road…cover some more ground before we camp for the night." Gabrielle nodded, wondering how she would explain her traveling companion. How to I describe who I really am and why I'm running away
from my life? * * *
"Having fun up here?" Gabrielle asked the small girl seated in front of her. "Uh huh," Tai nodded her head up and down, pausing to turn and smile up at the blonde. Gabrielle found that Tai's naturally rambunctious behavior was sedated as long as she rode astride the Queen's white stallion. The small girl held onto the pommel with both hands, appearing to enjoy the view from atop the large horse. They walked beside the wagon, the stallion's height putting them on the same level as Ella, driving the rig. "Make him go fast, Bri," Tai pleaded, rocking forward as if her own motion might propel the horse onward at a speedier pace. "Honey," Ella called out to her daughter. "Her name is Gabrielle." "Nooo…she said…before, Mama. She said Bri…bri-ranna." Ella looked across at Gabrielle. "Well, she was just teasing you then, sweetie. Her name is Gabrielle." "Gabri…llel," Tai tried to wrap her tongue around the new name. "Bri…I like Bri." The youngster was adamant, and seemed happy about her decision. Ella opened her mouth to object, but Gabrielle held her hand up to the woman. "It's okay, someone else used to call me that," a bittersweet smile appeared on the young Queen's face. "I'm used to it…really." Ella shook her head back and forth, an amused grin on her face. "I swear, that girl could get away with murder around you, Gabrielle." The small blonde laughed and Gabrielle realized she couldn't remember
the last time she did that. Gods, not to know how long it's been since I laughed. What's happening to me? Somewhere in the far recesses of the Queen's mind, something called to her, trying to make itself known. It was like a gnawing ache, never increasing in intensity, but always there, steady and uncomfortable. "Come on, Bri…make him go fast!" Tai began bouncing in the saddle. "You want to go fast, huh?" Gabrielle asked, wrapping her arm more securely around the youngster's middle. "Yah!" Gabrielle cried out as she used her heels to spur the white stallion forward. Ella laughed at her daughter's squeal of delight as the huge animal carried the small blonde and her giggling package quickly down the road and up the hill in only heartbeats. Ella surprised herself, having no fear that Gabrielle would harm her child. Here they'd known the small blonde for less than a day, and already Gabrielle felt like an old friend. She continued to watch them as they topped the rise and looked into the valley below. Suddenly, Gabrielle spurred her mount, swiftly riding back to the wagon. "Here you go, pumpkin," Gabrielle said, breathlessly, as she lifted Tai off the horse's back and into the wagon. "Gabrielle, is something wrong?" Ella asked in response to the look of concern on the small blonde's face. "Ella, I need to leave you alone for a bit. Don't worry…" Gabrielle hurriedly added at the woman's frightened expression, "…I won't be far. I'll be in those woods over there and I'll be able to see everything that happens." "Gabrielle, I don't understand. Did you see something over the hill?" "I'm sorry, I'm not explaining this well. There's a small band of warriors…it's okay, they're Amazons and they won't harm you. It's just…well, I just can't let them see me. Please, say you understand?" "Gabrielle…are these the people you're running from?" Ella asked.
"Yes," the young Queen answered. "They won't bother you, but I know them and they may see you alone and insist on helping you out. If they do want to escort you, I--" "I can handle them," Ella answered confidently. She took note of Gabrielle's worried frown when the blonde looked over at Tai. "Tai, honey," Ella began. "Remember when we left home and I told you that when strangers come around, you had to be quiet as a mouse?" Tai nodded her head in understanding. "Tai," Gabrielle drew the young girl's attention toward her. "I don't want you to lie, because that's bad, right?" Again, the youngster nodded. "Some women are coming down the road; warrior women, but I want to ask you not to say my name while they're here. Do you understand? Pretend you're a warrior and that you're keeping a big secret. Okay?" The small girl held up her hand; her thumb and forefinger just a pinch apart. "Quiet as a little mouse," Tai whispered. "Go on, before someone spots you," Ella said as the blonde quickly turned her animal away from the road. "Gabrielle," Ella called out. Gabrielle turned, a frantic look of trepidation etched across her face. "Don't worry, my friend," Ella smiled reassuringly. A quick smile from Gabrielle was all the blonde allowed herself, before urging her horse off into the trees. * * *
Gabrielle watched from deep within the darkened forest as the small group of Amazons hailed and approached the wagon. The young Queen knew the leader well. She remembered her first meeting with Tarazon. The young warrior literally fell unconscious before she and Xena last season, when Hera's sleeping sickness spread through their village. Tarazon started out in the guards, under Eponin's direction, quickly being promoted to Watch Commander. Gabrielle had no idea the small group of Amazons would be coming back from Thrace so soon. They were visiting their sisters, in the northernmost provinces, but weren't expected back, into Gabrielle's village, for another week. She could only assume that Tarazon was missing her new bride. The young Queen pulled further back, into the shadows, to watch the meeting that was taking place in the road below. "Good Afternoon," Tarazon hailed the woman driving the wagon. "Afternoon," Ella answered with what she hoped was a convincing smile. "What can I help you with?" "Are you traveling all alone?" Tarazon asked. "I don't mean to pry, and we mean you no harm, but it can be dangerous for a woman alone on these back roads. Won't you allow us to escort you?" "Oh, I'm almost there now." Ella laughed. "I could have used you a few days back, but there's no need at this point. My children and I are going to live with my sister and her husband…it's just the next farming community up the road." "Still, it's not the safest area in the known world, and Queen Gabrielle would have my hide if--" "Excuse me, what did you say?" Ella wondered if she heard the name right. "My Queen doesn't teach us to neglect those in need," Tarazon said slowly, smiling at the youngster seated beside the dark-haired woman.
"Your Queen…Gabrielle?" Ella was simply dumbfounded. Had she been traveling with the Queen of the Amazons all day? No, that's impossible, it's
another Gabrielle…It would explain it, though, wouldn't it? A small warrior…woman warrior. Tarazon was beginning to think the woman simple-minded, but she shook her head and smiled. "Sorry, my thoughts were elsewhere. Honestly, my brother in law will be on his way already to the crossroads. He's going t meet me there. I do appreciate the offer, but--" "And what's your name?" Tarazon interrupted to smile at Tai. Tai sidled closer to her mother. "She's shy is all," Ella explained. "I can understand that," Tarazon grinned, reaching over to muss the young girl's blonde hair. "Oooh, pretty," Tai said before she could catch herself. The youngster immediately slapped her own small hand over her mouth. Tarazon chuckled. "It's okay. You like this, huh? It's called a tattoo," the Amazon turned her wrist over to display the Amazon wedding symbol tattooed there. "See these blue feathers? Now if I was a Princess or a Queen, those feathers would be red." "It's very nice," Ella responded. "Well, I best be going…I don't want my brother in law to have to wait long." "All right, if you insist, I defer to your judgment," Tarazon answered. "It was very nice meeting you. And you too," she pointed at Tai and the girl finally smiled. "Let's be on our way," Tarazon called to the women riding behind her.
When they rode away, Gabrielle watched as Ella steered the wagon slowly up the road. The Queen followed the Amazons for a short while until a younger woman called, Alli, looked behind her nervously, once or twice. Gabrielle knew the Amazons were now headed for home. She turned her horse and urged him into a light canter, easily catching up to Ella and the children. Getting closer to the wagon, Gabrielle reached down and rubbed the white stallion's neck, slowing the animal down to a walk. "I don't even know what to call you yet. It's funny I was always so afraid of horses, but I don't feel that way sitting up here on you. You move as quick as lightning…so how about that for a name? Do you approve, Lightning?" The stallion snorted in response. "I'll take that as a yes, then. Come on, Lightning, lets catch up with the others." * * *
"By the Gods, what did you roll in while wearing these?" Ella sat on the bank of the creek, taking a soap and stiff brush to Gabrielle's leathers. The Queen held Tai, both she and the youngster taking a much-needed bath in a deep pool. The small and winding creek ended within a secluded copse of trees. Gabrielle was rather proud of herself for finding such a good campsite. She relied on Xena for many seasons for those skills. "Ella, I told you, leave those be, I can scrub my clothes," Gabrielle answered. "Nonsense. You're the one doing me a favor. Someone among us hates to get a b-a-t-h," Ella spelled out the word.
Ella paused to watch her daughter and the small blonde woman. The two laughed and giggled as if they were the only two people in the world. Ella appreciated the fact that Gabrielle's presence caused her daughter to open up and live the carefree life of a child again. She regretted her own actions, the ones that stole her daughter's childhood, putting them on the road, and demanded that Tai grow up too soon. Gabrielle sat Tai on a large flat rock, slightly above the surface of the water. Gabrielle worked the soap into a lather and massaged it into her hair, repeating the procedure on the small girl. Gabrielle used the foamy lather to create spikes in her hairdo, just as she and Lila did when they were children. Tai laughed and clapped her hands. "Me, too, Bri!" The youngster looked into the water at her own reflection, pointing at the stiff points that stuck out at weird angles from her head. Gabrielle changed the shape by flattening the hair into one long line down the middle of the girl's head. "Okay, let me show you how warrior's rinse the soap off, okay?" Tai nodded as Gabrielle scooped her into her arms and walked into the waist high water. "Now, we hold our breath under the water…" "I can do that!" Tai exclaimed. "Good girl! Okay, we hold our nose, go under the water, and shake our head back and forth," Gabrielle explained, trying to make it sound like a fun game. "Ready?" Tai had no fear of the water and held onto her nose, just as Gabrielle, did. The blonde held onto the girl in her arms and ducked under the water, rubbing the soap as the youngster had her eyes squeezed shut, shaking
her head. They popped up and Gabrielle rinsed the last bit of soap from their heads. "Ready to eat some of that stew?" The Queen asked. "Yes, please…I'm hungry!" "Well, we better see this big warrior gets her fill Ella," Gabrielle laughed. She deposited the child in her mother's waiting arms, the woman wrapping a large towel around the youngster. When Gabrielle stretched out her arms to set Tai down, Ella looked for the mark that, in her heart, she knew would already be there. The young Queen never saw the dark-haired woman's eyes widen in surprise when she glanced at the artistic design tattooed on the inside of Gabriele's wrist. There, set into the Amazon crest, were a pair of red feathers.
So, what are you running from, my small Amazon Queen? Gabrielle dried herself off and put on the extra shift Ella lent her. Since they decided to stop for the night, Gabrielle accepted the clothing, draping her own leathers on sturdy branches by the fire. The Queen merely hoped they didn't run into any trouble during the night. It was hard for the small blonde to look intimidating under the best of circumstances. It would be nigh unto impossible in nothing but a cotton slip. Gabrielle sat on a log beside the fire, breathing in the tempting aroma of the stew that Ella stirred in the cook pot. Gabrielle intended to set a snare for a rabbit, but a small peccary crossed her path and she brought him down quickly with her bow. It was an unusual thing for the young Queen to be camping under the stars and actually having someone else cook. A wave of lonesome nostalgia washed across her and she sat, pensively staring into the orange flames. Ella noticed that Gabrielle was quieter than she had been all day, the young woman simply watching as Ella fed Tai and Emery, then as the darkhaired woman gently put each child to sleep. Finally, it was only the two
women, alone at the fire. Ella could see the pain in the small blonde's face and she couldn't help but wonder what would make a woman who had everything, run away from her life? She knew if she came right out and asked, she would get that sad, mysterious smile of Gabrielle's. Ella, being the kind of person she was, felt the need to help her new friend. She drew in a deep breath and began. "I'm not exactly who people think I am, Gabrielle." "Few of us are, my friend," Gabrielle answered distractedly. Ella took in another breath and held it for a moment. She almost couldn't understand it, risking so much for someone she hardly knew, but for some reason, she felt it was important to help this sad, young woman; that somewhere, in the total scheme of things, it would become essential that Gabrielle return to the way of life she was running away from. "I killed a man," Ella said softly. Gabrielle's head snapped around at that, her eyes searching the darkhaired woman's face. "You?" Ella nodded her head, nervously licking dry lips. "It was an accident, right?" Gabrielle questioned. "Or self defense…you probably had to. You had no other choice?" "No…no, Gabrielle…I meant it," Ella responded, suddenly feeling the need to whisper. "I wanted him dead." "I…I don't know what to say? What…I mean, can I do anything…to help you?" Gabrielle asked. "Yes, you can, actually. I need someone, Gabrielle…someone I can trust. If I could just tell someone about it, maybe…well, maybe I wouldn't have all these horrible feelings of guilt. "Oh, Ella," Gabrielle placed a hand on the woman's arm. "Of course…if
you think it will help, I'm here for you." "I want someone to know what really happened, Gabrielle, in case…well, in case anything should happen to me, I want someone to be able to tell Tai and Emery the truth about what happened." Once again, the dark-haired woman was taken back at the compassion and friendship offered by the small blonde. Not only had Ella never experienced this kind of unconditional friendship before, but she never would have expected this amount of sympathy from a stranger; an Amazon warrior. Gabrielle watched as the woman seated next to her turned to stare into the fire, as if taking her eyes off Gabrielle could make it easier to tell her story. "He was my husband," Ella began. "I first met him when my uncle brought him to dinner one evening. My father had just passed over and my mother and I were left alone to run our farm. It wasn't a big farm, but it was enough for us. My mother and my uncle decided that I should marry someone who could stay and run the farm." Ella paused long enough to take a sip of her tea. "He was nice enough at first, but it was hard for me. I grew up on fairy tales…stories that said if you waited long enough, you would find the love of your life. Damar was a short man. I only mention that, because I truly think it's what made him such a mean person. It was like he had an obsession about it. He was always comparing another man to himself, not by his character, but by how much physically taller he was than Damar." "For some reason, Damar took it into his head that he was a small man on the inside, simply because he was small on the outside. As the years passed, he grew more and more angry. He eventually turned to drink, because when he was drunk, he felt like a big man. Damar did a lot of things…bad things, to make himself feel big in his own eyes. I wasn't too bad to look at back then," Ella self-consciously pushed a lock of hair behind her ear.
"You know, he used to take me to town with him, just to show me off to the other men, as if that too would make him a big man. Eventually, even that changed. It was humiliating for me. As long as Damar wasn't drinking, I was a bauble to make other men jealous. Once the liquor got to him, he would accuse me of flirting, say terrible, hurtful things to me. Then he would get angry with the other men, for watching me. He would lose control over the very reason he brought me there in the first place. By the time we would get home, it would be my fault, of course. At first it would be the men, then it would be me." "But, why you? Why not take his anger out at the men looking at you?" Gabrielle asked. "I suppose because he knew I couldn't hit him back. It took me a long time to realize Damar was a frightened coward." "Ella…he hit you?" Gabrielle felt the wet tears on her own cheeks. "I was surprised the first time, and the second, and even the third time it happened. The next morning, Damar would always be sorry and he would promise that it would never happen it again. At first, I believed him. Then I continued to believe him because I wanted to believe. By then, it was too late. I was caught in a life I couldn't get free of. One day, Damar hit Tai. It wasn't enough to hurt here on the outside, but I know it affected her deeply. I swore then, that I would never allow him to hurt his daughters, the way he hurt me. I planned it all out. I began packing a little at a time, saving dinars when I could." Tears ran down Ella's face and she brushed them away. Gabrielle jumped up and brought the waterskin back with her. The dark-haired woman took a few swallows and then continued. "I was ready to leave. I wrote to my sister in Abdera and she and her husband said I could come stay with her. I knew her husband didn't really want me there, but I had no other options. I knew Damar wouldn't let me just leave, so we planned to sneak away when he was in town, but he came
back early. He was drunk and very angry…I don't even remember how it happened exactly, but I do remember seeing him grab Tai by the back of the neck. I think…it happened so fast, Gabrielle, it was like I was watching myself take this big iron skillet and hit Damar in the back of the head. He didn't move…didn't breathe. Then we ran. I just scooped up my babies and ran…there was so much blood…" Ella mused, pausing in her narrative and staring into the flames. "It was an accident, Ella. You couldn't allow that man to hurt your children," Gabrielle reasoned. "I keep telling myself that, but I wonder if I'm just trying to justify what I did. Do you really think that, Gabrielle? You wouldn't say it just to make me feel better, would you?" "I don't think I'm saying it for that reason at all, Ella. You went through a terribly abusive experience and it wasn't as if you planned on that happening. I know what it's like to do anything at all to protect the people you love. I know what it feels like to give up your whole life; everything you have, in the hope that you're making their life better." Ella watched as Gabrielle turned back toward the fire, as if speaking aloud to herself. The dark-haired woman's heart felt lighter in the unburdening of her own secret. She never thought it would be possible for anyone to hear her tale, and still not judge her harshly. Amazingly enough, it was a stranger with her own tortured past who offered Ella absolution. "Gabrielle, why does it sound like you're harboring some of your own demons?" Ella asked, laying a gentle hand on the small blonde's arm. Tears filled Gabrielle's eyes and slowly spilled out, tracking their way down her tanned cheeks. Emerald eyes burned a deep green as the flames from the fire danced within the viridian orbs. "What I'm running from, Ella, can't be compared to you or what you've done. The blood on my hands isn't there from anything noble at all. I--"
Gabrielle broke down, sobbing, drawing her knees up to her chest, unable to continue. "Oh, Gabrielle," Ella put her arm around the young woman, listening to her cries. The dark-haired woman patiently waited for the blonde's tears to abate. "It's all right. I couldn't possibly think badly of you. I don't see that in you, the ability to hurt people." "But I do," Gabrielle wiped the tears from her face. "Ella, I killed my baby." The dark-haired woman knew how important the next few moments would be to the young Queen; how vital Ella's reaction would be to Gabrielle. Ella mustered all the compassion she could and let it shine from her eyes. Pulling back to look into Gabrielle's face, Ella offered the blonde a sympathetic smile. "Gabrielle, you just told me that you know how it feels to be me, but I know some of what you're going through, too. I know what it's like to think the whole world is watching you, waiting to judge you. What it's like to feel guilt and pain pulling at you so hard that you don't think life is worth living anymore. Knowing these things, I have a very hard time thinking you could have possibly done anything to harm your own baby," Ella finished. "I did. My baby…I was pregnant," Gabrielle replied calmly through her continued tears. "The Healer told me time and again, my wife told me… they said that I had to take it easy…that I couldn't do things, but I did them anyway." "Gabrielle, that is not an unforgivable crime. We often don't heed the advice given to us, even when it's important, but that is an accident, not murder. Surely the people who care about you…your wife, surely she told you this?" "I--I couldn't tell her what I did. She knows my nightmares, though," Gabrielle paused long enough to explain the dreamscape to her new friend.
In explaining the dreamscape to Ella, Gabrielle soon found herself describing more than she planned about herself, the village, and her friends. She looked up suddenly, realizing that she began to use the word Amazon. She wondered if she already revealed too much, falling silent. "Gabrielle," Ella said softly. "I already know." "Know?" Ella reached out and gently grasped Gabrielle's wrist, turning it over. "It's hard to miss this." "Oh," Gabrielle looked down at the tattoo. "Well, it's an Amazon tradition… all married couples have them" "Yes, but only royalty have the feathers colored in red, don't they?" Gabrielle was surprised at the woman's knowledge. How long had her new friend known? Gods, it must have been Tarazon! "You're Gabrielle of Potidaea, aren't you?" Ella asked. "How in the known world did you know that?" a stunned bard asked. Ella smiled. "I once heard some wonderful stories from a traveling bard. He came into town and we listened to him at the local tavern. I don't remember his name, but I remember the stories he told. They were all about the Warrior Princess and how she mended her ways, all for the love of a small Amazon Queen, Gabrielle, the bard from Potidaea. That is you, isn't it?" Smiling sadly through her tears, Gabrielle lowered her head and nodded. "Tell me more, Gabrielle, of your life." Ella requested. Gabrielle nodded and began again. It took a very long time, however, for the young Queen to bring up Xena. Eventually, Gabrielle found herself revealing her thoughts and fears to Ella. The small blonde did think it odd, though. While she was speaking to Ella, she realized how all of this
sounded. It sounded…well, unbelievable. "So, if all of this seems so unbelievable to my heart…to other people, why does it appear to make so much sense to my head?" Gabrielle asked. Ella smiled at her friend. At least confusion was a start. Uncertainty looked much better on this young Amazon, rather than the firm conviction of her own guilt. Ella wasn't sure she had the answers that Gabrielle needed to hear, though. "Gabrielle, I don't know if I can answer that. I do think you need to start questioning some of your feelings instead of just accepting them as the absolute truth." "Like what kind of questions?" Gabrielle asked in a quiet voice. Ella actually forgot her own sorrow for a time, seeing an uncharacteristic vulnerability in the small woman seated beside her, a frailty that hadn't been evident up to this point. The dark-haired woman thought it encouraging. She recognized how important it was for a warrior not to question their emotions, but she could only imagine the burden of guilt this young woman was struggling to carry. Ella couldn't even fathom the grief she would be experiencing if she'd lived in Gabrielle's place. "Well, first of all, I can tell by the things you've told me about Xena that you and she share a very special kind of love. Now, does it make sense that a woman who would risk her life, time and again, would leave you at the first sign of trouble?" "I guess not…" Gabrielle drawled, biting her lip. The Queen's brow furrowed as a look of intense concentration settled on her face. "What is it, Gabrielle?" "I…" Gabrielle shook her head back and forth, as if trying to shake the cobwebs loose. "I feel like something…answers are right there," Gabrielle reached out her hand, grasping air, "but the harder I try to reach them, the
further they move away from me." Gabrielle looked over at her knew friend, running a hand through newly shorn blonde locks. "Do I sound as crazy to you as I do to myself?" Nervous laughter erupted from her throat. Ella laid a hand over Gabrielle's own. "Not crazy, only confused, my friend. Think about what you do, Gabrielle. Think very hard. I don't know why, but for some reason I feel as if a great deal depends on how you resolve all of this." Ella laughed aloud. "Now, I'm the one who sounds crazy, seeing shadows where there are none." "You're a good friend, Ella. I'm glad I met you." Gabrielle entwined her fingers within Ella's delicate hand. "My thoughts exactly," the dark-haired woman smiled.
CHAPTER 13
"XENA LOOK OUT!" Gabrielle cried out, sitting up immediately and snatching her weapons. "Mama, Bri's having bad dreams," Tai said loudly, which caused Emery to start crying. Gabrielle's eyes quickly adjusted to the predawn darkness. She shivered, not from the cool of the morning, but from the last vestiges of the nightmare that still clung to her awareness. Moving swiftly, she knelt down beside Tai. "Ssh, Tai, your mama needs her sleep."
"Too late," Ella grinned, stepping in the light that the burning coals in the campfire made. The slender woman held Emery in her arms and sat down to feed the fussing baby. "Mama, I'm hungry, too," Tai chimed in. "There's still time to sleep, Tai, don't you want to snuggle down in the blankets for a little while longer?" Gabrielle asked. "Uh uh," the youngster shook her head back and forth. Ella laughed at Gabrielle's attempt. "We might as well start our day," Ella chuckled. Gabrielle rose and placed another log on the fire, watching as the dry wood caught spark and threw flames into the air, pushing back the darkness from around their small camp. They enjoyed a breakfast of fruit and cheese, Gabrielle helping Tai, while Ella fed the baby, Emery. By the time the sky had lightened to a pale gray, the small band was on their way. "That same dream again?" Ella asked Gabrielle as the blonde road beside the wagon. Gabrielle shook her head, turning to look at the dark-haired woman. "It was different this time. It was…I dreamed of Xena. This is the first time I haven't had that same nightmare I told you about." "How was it different?" Ella asked. Xe was in trouble," Gabrielle stated, flatly. They rode along in relative silence, Tai's occasional chatter the only thing interrupting the quiet. Even the youngster eventually noticed the strained look on the blonde Amazon's face. Tai fell still, seated beside her mother on the slow moving wagon. Ella watched the young woman out of the corner of her eye, realizing it would be up to her to persuade the Amazon to open up her thoughts.
"It would help if you talked about it," Ella said at last. "Hmph," Gabrielle snorted. Seeing the slightly wounded look on Ella's face, the young Queen immediately regretted her callous action. She thought back to the time when a young blonde bard, hopelessly infatuated with the tall dark warrior she traveled with, experienced the same thing. Gabrielle remembered the hurt she suffered every time Xena, unwittingly, remained distant…keeping to herself, acting as if Gabrielle weren't even there. The young woman mustered up a small smile and offered it to Ella in apology. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disregard you that way," Gabrielle added to the smile. "I understand, Gabrielle. It's not in a warrior's nature to open up." Gabrielle offered a bittersweet smile. "I'm not really a warrior, not a true one anyway." "I suppose we always see ourselves differently than others view us," Ella responded. "Tell me what you're thinking so hard about today." "What you said I should be thinking hard about," Gabrielle answered. "I've been trying to sort things out in my mind, you know, wondering why they make so much sense one minute and the same thoughts seem absolutely ludicrous the next. I dreamed of Xena," she added softly. "It looked like she was in trouble. I saw a large black panther stalking her…the rest was just bits here and there. It was different, though. Now, suddenly, part of me still thinks I'm doing the right thing, but then there's a very small part that wonders what in the known world I'm doing." "Well, that's good, right?" Ella questioned. "I'm not so sure. Ella, I've set myself on a path. I can't let a few doubts and insecurities steer me off course." "Gabrielle, you talk about yourself as though you were a ship in the middle
of a wild sea. You're a human being, filled with thought and emotions, many of them unpredictable and uncontrollable. You can't simply say, ‘I will be a certain way' and then expect it to miraculously be that way." "That's exactly what I expect, Ella. My friend," Gabrielle softened her voice to explain. "A warrior can't afford to get caught up in feeling things. If I'm in the middle of a fight and I allow my emotions, my feelings, to get the better of me…I could get myself killed. What's worse, I could get someone around me killed." "What are you smiling at?" Gabrielle asked. "You," Ella kept her eyes straight ahead. "For a woman who keeps telling everyone that she's not a warrior, you sure do enjoy talking about what a warrior should be." "I--" Gabrielle began, opening her mouth to speak. Knowing she was beat, the Queen simply closed her mouth again and turned her head, but not before she grinned affectionately at her friend. * * *
"What is this?" Hera screamed at the dark-skinned man. "I was told you were a mystic who had abilities to rival a God. God of what? Stupidity?! "Forgive me, my Queen, but--" "Quiet!" Hera shouted as she paced one of the spacious rooms in the castle on Olympus. "You let Xena slip through your grasp and now you're losing her Amazon slut." "I wouldn't exactly say, losing her," Ortolan said. "Oh, no? Well, Mighty Mystic of Stupidity, what would you say? She's
starting to think her own thoughts." "Well, she is a Queen with considerable strengths and a strong will… argh--" Immediately Ortolan dropped to his knees, fighting for breath. Hera sat down on a marble chair that appeared very throne-like. Ortolan gasped for air as an unseen force closed around his throat, crushing his windpipe. Hera smiled her most evil smile as the mystic finally realized it was the Goddess who was slowly squeezing the life from him. "I am a Queen with considerable strength and it is my will alone that can either save you or crush you." Ortolan nodded, groveling along the tile on his belly, clawing at the smooth floor. He nodded again. Hera waved her hand distractedly and the only sounds in the chamber were the loud gasps of breath taken by the mystic, while the Goddess appeared lost in thought. She rose and quickly made her way from the room, pausing in front of the open doorway with her back to the darkskinned man. "Ortolan, are we clear on who is the Queen and who is the whore? Hmmm?" "Quite, my Queen." The mystic rose, massaging his throat with a large hand. "I will not fail you." Hera laughed then, the harsh and unforgiving sound echoing off the high columned walls. "If you do, Ortolan, I'll not simply put you back in the pits of Tartarus myself. I'll tie a rope around your neck and you'll spend eternity as an anchor for Charon's boat." The Goddess' cold laughter filtered back to the mystic as he watched her walk briskly from the room. The fear the Olympic Queen could instill,
even in a heartless soul such as Ortolan's, caused his nonexistent blood to chill. * * *
They stopped in a quiet looking meadow for a short rest. The food Gabrielle purchased in Pella was running low and they would need to buy some more supplies in the next town. The small blonde began to feel guilty over the way she'd treated Ella and Tai during the morning. Baby Emery was oblivious, and as she held the child while Ella and Tai washed up, Gabrielle was taken back at what the unconditional love of a child felt like. Emery smiled and giggled as the blonde played peek-a-boo and kissed the baby's belly. "She likes you, Bri. Doesn't she mama?" Tai and Ella slipped up without Gabrielle noticing and the Queen blushed in embarrassment at being caught in the child-play. Ella smiled and nodded to her daughter. "We all like you, Bri." Tai smiled, but Gabrielle could see the tiny reservation in the girl's eyes.
Gods, I bet this is how Xena used to feel when she would snap at me. I'd still be nice to her and she would feel like a complete jerk. Gabrielle remembered the small sack of treats she purchased in Pella and quickly rose, returning to sit beside the small girl again. "I was kind of a grump this morning, huh?" Gabrielle said to the child who now smiled brightly. "But not anymore. Right?" Tai asked, hopefully.
"No, not anymore. How could I be in a bad mood with a cutie like you around?" Gabrielle reached over and scooped the small child in her arms; tickling the youngster until the girl laughed so hard, she couldn't breathe. Gabrielle released the child and reached into the small sack. She pulled out a handful of soft candies, a chewy sweet treat made from the dark molasses that grew in the Greek Islands. "Are your hands clean?" Tai nodded enthusiastically, straining her neck to see what the Queen was going to pull out of the small bag. "Hold out your hands," Gabrielle instructed. A heartbeat later, the youngster held out both hands. Gabrielle pushed the hands together and placed a number of the treats in the girl's cupped hands. The look of surprise on Tai's face was something that Gabrielle swore she would never forget. "All for me?" she asked softly. "Yes, sweetheart, all for you. I'm sorry I was such a bear this morning," Gabrielle answered. "Thank you, Bri," Tai threw her arms around the Queen's neck, both tiny hands clutching the sticky candy. Running to her mother's side, Tai held out her treasures. "Here, mama, want one?" "No, sweetie, those are just for you," Ella chuckled, looking at the soft candies being mashed in her daughter's hands. Tai retrieved her wooden sword and fought with her imaginary foes in the high grass a short distance away. Gabrielle sat down next to Ella as the dark-haired woman fed Emery. "She's such a good baby. I hardly ever hear her cry or fuss," Gabrielle commented.
"I've been lucky, Tai was the same way." Ella paused, formulating the words in her head. "Thank you, Gabrielle. It hurts so much not to be able to do little things like that for my daughter." Tears flowed down the darkhaired woman's face. "Oh, Ella," Gabrielle put an arm around her new friend and let her cry for a long while. "It will get better, I know it will. Just don't give up hope, all right? Tai and Emery both need you to keep that. Besides, I feel your future is going to get better starting right now." "You do, eh?" "Yep." Gabrielle answered and held open the sack she still had in her possession. Ella leaned over and peered into the bag. "Oh, honeyed dates!" She looked up into the smiling blonde's face. "I haven't had these in such a long time." "Well hand over that little bundle asleep in your arms and I'll trade you," Gabrielle held out the sack. "You are too much, my friend…simply too much!" * * *
The old woman watched them from the side of the dirt road. Antira wasn't a big town, but the village was on one of the alternate roads into Abdera, therefore strangers were always plentiful. This small party caught her eye, even among the throng of people the festival attracted. She thought about the advantages to being old. People passed her on the side of the road without a second glance. She was as invisible as the air to them, yet she was thankful for that fact today. She was getting rather hungry, however, but the wooden bowl she held out to the men and women who passed her by
was still empty. She silently watched as the women uneasily wended their way through the crowds of people. Observation, that was the key. The people, who branded her as a witch, and more, never knew the half of it. She learned more about people from simply watching them, than she could ever learn from the bottom of a tea mug. The dark-haired woman was slender, yet held the reins of the wagon as though she'd worked behind a farm team all her life. A bright young soul bounced on the seat next to her, one moment wide-eyed at the sights and sounds around her, the next moment, the youngster was sliding closer to the woman. Fear wasn't something children had by nature, and so the woman shook her head at the reasons why a child of this age would fear strangers. The one on the horse was intriguing. Her eyes, bright and intelligent, never stopped moving, even when she turned her head and spoke to the child, saying something that made the youngster laugh. Even then, the small blonde's eyes searched the crowds, always aware of what was happening around her. She rode upon a massive warhorse, snow white, the animal watching the strangers around him with as much unease as his mistress. The young woman's leathers couldn't hide the way the muscles in her neck and shoulders bunched and tensed among the people. The small warrior kept her mount positioned rather protectively alongside the wagon. It became clear as to why when the wagon stopped at the end of the row of open market tents. The warrior tied her horse off to the wagon and dismounted, opening her arms just in time to capture the laughing girl from the wagon. The dark-haired woman reached into a well cushioned spot directly behind her seat and scooped up a small baby. The old woman continued to beg at the side of the road, waiting for her opportunity. * * *
"What do you think?" Ella asked Gabrielle nervously. "Well, I certainly didn't anticipate this many people. It must be some kind of local summer festival. How about I simply replenish our supplies while you wait here? It's just too many people for my liking," Gabrielle responded. Ella nodded her head and Gabrielle strolled off. Both women were unaware of the eyes that followed them. The small blonde finished the task rather quickly, amazing herself. Gabrielle usually loved to shop, strolling through the vendor's tents, haggling over the price of tomatoes. Now, all she could think about was getting what she needed, so they could be on their way as quickly as possible. The sheer number of celebrating citizens put her nerves on edge. Gabrielle made her way back to the wagon, running into two soldiers talking to Ella. The blonde noticed the insignia on their armor was from the Athenian garrison. They were a long way from their own territory and from the way one of them was listing to port, they'd been drinking for a while. She took in the nervous glances Ella threw at them, then the one of relief when the dark-haired woman saw Gabrielle approach. Gabrielle put on the mask she reserved for occasions like this. She placed her sacks in the back of the wagon and called to Tai. The youngster ran from her mother's skirts into the blonde's arms, Gabrielle lifting the child into the back of the wagon. "Ella, get in the wagon," Gabrielle said in a tight voice, paying no heed to the soldiers. Both men turned drunken eyes to the small blonde. Ella took that opportunity to quickly climb into the wagon, turning to assure herself that Tai and Emery were both safe. Gabrielle knew the soldiers wouldn't start anything major with this many people around, but drunken men are unpredictable.
"Hey, who in Hades do you think you are?" The largest man slurred. He made the monumental mistake of grabbing Gabrielle's arm, pulling her around to face him. The small woman's eyes burned emerald fire, even as her voice was devoid of emotion. "If you don't get your hand off of me, I'll slice it off." The vehemence in the young woman's glare was enough to cause the second man to back up a step. It was obvious he was a little more sober than his friend. "You little--" "Come on, mate, can't you see how it is?" the second man said. Gabrielle knew he was thinking that she and Ella were lovers, but in this particular instance, she wasn't in a hurry to dispel the notion. The drunken man allowed himself to be led away by his friend, but Gabrielle watched as they met up with two other men in front of the tavern. They walked into the establishment, laughing and throwing some curious glances in Gabrielle's direction. "Well, that wasn't very pleasant," Gabrielle gave a weak smile to her friend. "Gods, you scared even me. Do you think they're gone for good?" Ella questioned. "We can only hope so. I think we ought to move on, though, just in case they decide to come back. Sometimes, drink can make a man brave, or at the very least make him do something stupid." The two women steered their way to the edge of town, allowing them to take an easy breath as the festival revelers thinned considerably. Gabrielle walked beside the slow moving wagon, leading Lightning along behind her. She felt more relaxed now that there weren't as many people to watch. Again, the thought of Xena popped into her head. This must be why Xena
hates crowds. She's almost claustrophobic, but now I can relate. I always depended on her abilities to keep us out of harm's way. It's a completely different story when it all falls on your shoulders. A slight commotion on the side of the small road instantly brought the Queen out of her thoughts and into the present. A man, obviously in a hurry to reach the center of town, rushed by an old woman begging at the edge of the dirt road. He knocked a small bowl from her hands and hurried on his way, never looking back to the frail looking woman, sprawled in the dirt. Gabrielle let loose of Lightning's reins and rushed over to the old woman, helping her get to stand. "Why aren't you the kind soul," the old woman smiled at Gabrielle. "Are you all right?" "Oh, I may be old, but my bones aren't brittle yet. I just don't bounce as well as I did in my younger days." The old woman offered her most endearing smile to the small blonde. "I think I'm just a little weak…I haven't eaten anything today." The woman watched a pain flash across the young woman's green eyes. Yes…she's the one. "Come with us, we were just going to stop for a meal and we have plenty," Gabrielle offered, leading the woman over to the wagon. * * *
Ella offered the old woman a seat next to her in the wagon and Gabrielle provided some fruit and cheese, along with a slice of flat bread. They ate as they traveled, just enough to appease their growling stomachs. They wanted to put a bit of distance between themselves and the previous town. Neither Ella nor Gabrielle spoke of it, but each woman had experienced a curious feeling of foreboding while in the small village. They were more than happy to put off their midday meal until farther away.
After a few candlemarks of travel, the party stopped in a quiet area of the forest. They shared all they had with the old woman. "What's your name, my friend?" Gabrielle asked as they sat under the shade provided by the large olive trees. "Oh my, I've been called so many things and for so long…do you know it's been so long since someone asked, I'm not sure I remember what it is in my own language, but you would pronounce it, Bedilia." "You're not from Greece?" Ella asked. "Heavens no, but I've been here for so long now that I've come to think of it as home." "How long is that?" Gabrielle asked the indelicate question before she realized it. "Before time began my dear, before time began," Bedilia answered. Gabrielle looked at Ella and the dark-haired woman hid a smile behind her hand. The young Queen rolled her eyes a bit, as they humored Bedilia and listened attentively to story after story the old woman told. Bedilia finished a tale and leaned back, her eyes showing no signs of the age her body did. "So, my dear, I've been telling tales for quite a while now," Bedilia said to Gabrielle, "but we have yet to hear you grace us with a story." Gabrielle looked up in surprise, the smile gone from her face. "I'm not much of a storyteller," she mumbled. "Hmm, I find that odd. The air around you fairly screams of your talents in that direction." "You're a seer, is that it?" Ella tried to make light of the old woman's questions, knowing Gabrielle wanted no one to know she was a bard.
"I admit, I charge a small price for what I see," Bedilia admitted. "Ahh, a fortune teller, then," Gabrielle replied with a worried smile. The small blonde was hesitant now. The few times she had run into so called fortune tellers, they had an uncanny knack of predicting something catastrophic in her life. "I see you are a doubter." The old woman smiled at Gabrielle. Bedilia knew that the blonde's manner came from belief in the powers of a seer, not disbelief. "Nooo," Gabrielle drawled thoughtfully. "I just feel like we have to make our own future." Even as Gabrielle said the words, the Queen thought she sounded a lot like her wife. "Perhaps you, little one," Bedilia pulled Tai into her lap and the normally shy girl smiled up at her. The old woman took the girl's hands in her own and then Bedilia smiled. "We have a great warrior in our midst. Tai will grow up to be a Champion to a Queen." Gabrielle arched an eyebrow. "And Ella?" Bedilia asked, holding out her hand. It was obvious that the dark-haired woman had reservations about relinquishing her hands, but her curiosity appeared to override any other concern. Bedilia took the offered hands and paused, her brow creasing. She took in a deep breath, releasing it slowly. "It's difficult to start anew, isn't it?" Bedilia asked. Ella quickly looked up at Gabrielle, pulling her hand from the old woman's grasp. The slender woman laughed nervously, her hand going to her throat. "I'm sure I don't know what you mean," she responded. Bedilia smiled, one of those charming smiles that elderly women us with young children. "Well, my dear, I suppose that's why you should listen to the
young warrior here," Bedilia indicated Gabrielle. "Perhaps it's not a good idea to put too much belief in a fortune teller." "I'm not a warrior," Gabrielle said automatically. Bedilia turned to the small blonde. "Now for you, my cynical young friend," she said, extending her hands. "Don't tell me you're afraid?" "The truth doesn't scare me," The Queen responded. "Then you have nothing to be frightened of, do you?" Gabrielle felt the old woman was challenging her, but she suddenly laughed to herself. Why in the known world should I be afraid of anything this sweet, crazy old woman could tell me? "Very well," Gabrielle replied with a smug grin. She moved to kneel in front of the old woman, presenting both her hands, palm up. "Give me your best shot." Bedilia smiled and wrapped her hands around those of the young woman before her. In an instant, the old woman's head was filled with visions of the probable and the impossible. A soul, whose existence spanned nearly as much time in this world as the old woman's, cried out. Many pasts and futures spun their web before her mind's eye, yet all along, she saw the other. There was never one without the other, through the good and the bad, the trying and the terrible. Then there was the intervention. Bedilia saw it finally, so well hidden that even the Gods themselves would not have spied it out. There, like a tiny kernel, it was planted. It started small and spread quickly, but its hold was growing tenuous for no apparent reason. Gabrielle lost her smug smile as soon as the old woman took hold of her hands. The small blonde became nearly frantic as she felt Bedilia taking hold of her mind as well. The Queen tried to pull away, but found herself
caught in a strong grip, much stronger than the old woman's frail appearance indicated the grasp should be. At last, her ears heard the old woman's voice, yet Gabrielle was uncertain whether the sound was real or in her head. "You must rejoin her, Gabrielle. The very fabric of all that exists will be changed if you do not." Finally, the woman released the Queen and Gabrielle fell backward from the force of trying to pull her hands free. "Are you all right, dear?" the old woman asked. "What…what did you say? What did she say?" Gabrielle looked at Ella. "Nothing, Gabrielle, she said nothing," the dark-haired woman responded. "It works that way sometime," Bedilia straightened herself and then laughed at the serious look on the faces of those around her. "I told you, you shouldn't put too much stock in these things," she commented offhandedly. After all, my ability to tell the future is simply a matter of observation…good guesses." The old woman smiled and it was so genuine that Gabrielle and Ella both believed her. Gabrielle chuckled softly, realizing that it probably was simple observation. Calling Tai a future warrior, well, that wouldn't be difficult considering the wooden sword the girl carried with her. Then there was Ella. I do suppose seeing a woman traveling alone…with two children…it would be natural to think her a widow, someone starting out to being her life fresh. Yes, that it. They made their way back to the wagon to travel a little longer before nightfall. Bedilia led the way, hand in hand with Tai. Suddenly, Ella pulled at Gabrielle's elbow, slowing the pair down. "Gabrielle, do you believe her? What she said about it all being a trick?"
"Sure…don't you?" "No." Gabrielle looked ahead to watch Tai and Bedilia stroll along, and then faced Ella. "Why would you think that?" she asked with concern. "Because," Ella glanced ahead to the old woman and her daughter once more, "we never told her our names, Gabrielle."
CHAPTER 14
THE SMALL BLONDE opened her mouth to speak, to refute the suspicion in some way. Her mind rapidly ran through the time they spent with Bedilia and it was true. The Queen couldn't remember having told the old woman who they were, yet she still seemed to know all about them. "I don't know what to think," Gabrielle responded in a hesitant voice. "Why would an old woman, an oracle, try to set us up?" Both women realized they had completely stopped moving and glanced ahead nervously. They were caught with the guilty expressions fixed on their faces just as Bedilia turned to look at them. The old woman smiled, but her face appeared so unnervingly honest that a shiver passed through Gabrielle's body. The woman looked only at Gabrielle and the young Queen felt something pass between them. Try as she might, Gabrielle couldn't pick up any evil or hidden intentions from the old woman. Bedilia turned away, chuckling as she did so. "Coming ladies?" Ella watched as her daughter held the old woman's hand. "Gabrielle, I--"
"Hey, it's okay," Gabrielle could see the concern etched across Ella's face. "I know this is going to sound a little strange, considering everything we just heard, but I don't get a bad feeling from this woman. I know there's more to her than she's letting on, but I think Tai's safe. I don't think that she means us any harm." "I know what you mean, Gabrielle. She unnerves me something terrible, but I don't feel any wrongness about her," Ella agreed. "Why don't we just get back on the road and continue on. If her finding us was no accident, I'm sure the reason will become apparent soon enough. Okay?" "Right," Ella nodded. "Oh this just keeps getting better," Gabrielle responded, looking past Ella toward the wagon. Grouped around the wooden wagon were the soldiers from town. They looked slightly more sober, but not by much. Bedilia already sat in the front of the vehicle, Tai right behind her. Ella, Emery in her arms, moved to rush to Tai's defense, but Gabriele's strong grip held her in place. "Don't let them see you panic," the Queen said in a fierce tone. "Walk right by them and get up in the wagon." "Well, well, the two lovebirds…" the first man said when Ella and Gabrielle came forward. Gabrielle saw the look in the man's eye as she walked past him, giving Ella a hand into the wagon. She saw a lot more than a rebuffed suitor in his expression. She saw anger there, and the look frightened her. "Come on, let's get on with it," one of the men said impatiently.
"All in good time," the first soldier responded with an evil grin. "Look, you said they had sacks of dinars and we'd get half!" "He lied to you," Gabrielle chimed in, still standing beside the wagon. "We don't have anything of value." The fourth soldier looked up into the wagon, then over at Gabrielle. "Then maybe we'll just have to take it out of you in trade," he laughed. "If I wanted a woman, I would've stayed in the village an' took one what was willing. I don't need this." "They got money all right and if they don't got it, they'll fetch a good price on the block," the first man continued to grin. "Let's be reasonable," Gabrielle said evenly, putting herself between the first soldier and the wagon, where Tai sat. She looked the soldier up and down trying to gauge any weakness he might have. She did notice that only two of the men wore swords. The insignia on the soldiers shoulder armor caught the small blonde's eye. "You fight under the banner of Petracles," she commented. "Petracles is at war with Gaul, you're a long way from the front," Gabrielle continued. The men cast nervous glances at one another. The fourth man, obviously the most reluctant of the bunch, was the first to cave. "That's it…I'm getting out of here." "Wait a minute, you gonna let a little bitch like this, scare you off?" "I ain't scared, but this don't seem worth it. I told you someone would figure it out!" "You're deserters," Gabrielle said aloud. "You shut up!" the first soldier screamed at her, drawing his sword.
Gabrielle retrieved both sais from her boots so quickly, two of the soldiers backed up a step. "Deserters…I should have known," Gabrielle provoked the man further. "Cowards disgust me." "You ain't seen what I've seen, girl," the soldier growled, circling the Queen until he was beside the wagon. "You have no idea…" Gabrielle returned. "Well, if you're gonna put up such a fight, maybe we'll just take this one!" For a drunken man, the soldier moved surprisingly fast. He balanced himself with his sword hand placed on the wagon and reached in, grabbing Tai by the collar. Gabrielle was faster and all her protective instincts kicked in when she saw the man reach for the child. The blonde raised the metal sai over her head and brought it down with the full force of her weight, directly into the man's hand, resting upon the wagon. The point of the dagger-like weapon pierced the back of the soldier's hand, biting deep into the wood underneath. The soldier screamed in agony as the weapon pinned his sword hand to the side of the wagon. His screams simply grew louder when he tugged on his hand in an attempt to free himself. The other man carrying a sword stepped in to attack Gabrielle from behind. He lunged forward with his sword just as Gabrielle hit the ground, rolling and scooping up the first soldier's fallen sword. The second man realized the small woman had moved a heartbeat too late and he was unable to stop his forward momentum. His sword plunged easily into his friend's abdomen. Gabrielle seemed more surprised than anyone else, when Bedilia took the bucket at her feet, picked it up and struck the second man over the head with it. Gabrielle then plunged his own blade into his heart. The small blonde reached over and pulled on the sai, feeling the bones crunch as it slid through the dead man's hand. She immediately spun around and prepared to meet the second two, more reluctant, attackers.
It was a fight that seemed to last much longer in Gabrielle's mind than in reality. Neither of the two men had a weapon, but they were soldiers and skilled in hand-to-hand combat. Gabrielle had turned into quite a warrior, no matter how often she would try to dispute the fact with others. She was good, but the blonde was tiring and there were two of them. Gabrielle wasn't quite sure how it happened afterward, but she did remember one thing. In her line of sight, as she looked over the largest man's left shoulder, she saw Bedilia. Whether it was a trick of the sun or her own mind, she couldn't be sure, but it appeared as if the old woman grinned at her. A heartbeat later, Gabrielle felt her legs go out from underneath her, her head striking the ground sharply. The last thing she saw before darkness enveloped her conscious mind was the shadow of the two men looming over her. * * *
"Don't touch her!" The hard-edged voice was enough to cause both men to snap their heads around. Ella stood up in the wagon, a medium size crossbow shaking ever so slightly in her tense grip. Don't let them see you panic, that's what Gabrielle said. The dark-haired woman fixed what she thought looked like a proper scowl on her face. The crossbow was small, but held three arrows in a fitting, one above the other. The arrows were nearly half the size of regular ones, looking more like twelve inch darts. The detachable fitting held the arrows one above the other. The moment one was shot, the next dropped down to be notched and ready to fire. "Step away from her and be on your way and we'll call this over. Trust me, I know how to shoot this," her voice covered the nervousness she felt. She was frightened out of her wits, not knowing whether her friend on the ground was seriously injured or not.
"Aaah," the shortest man discounted the woman's threat and moved toward Gabrielle, suddenly spying the bag of dinars on the unconscious woman's belt. Ella didn't lie to the man. She may have been nervous as all Tartarus, but her aim was true. She squeezed the trigger just as the man's hand was in mid reach toward the fallen blonde. The arrow caught the man just below his wrist, running halfway through. His screams were more pain than anger and the second man simply stood there with his eyes as wide as saucers. "All right, all right!" the second man said raising both hands. He grabbed the screaming and crying man and pulled him to his feet. "We're goin', we're goin'…just keep your head about ya." "On your horses…now!" Ella shouted and the men moved faster. "You broads been without men way too long!" he shouted back. Ella immediately turned and hugged her terrified daughter. "It's okay, it's all over, sweetie," then she jumped from the wagon, followed by Bedilia. "Gabrielle?" Ella cried out, kneeling beside the blonde's prone form. She quickly examined the still figure. "She's still breathing," Ella told Bedilia. The old woman slipped a hand underneath the small blonde's head, tenderly probing the young woman's skull. "There's no blood, but she has a lump the size of Olympus back here," Bedilia commented. "Why won't she wake up? Are you sure it's not serious?" Ella asked in a tearful voice. "No need to fear, my dear. The young Queen is experiencing a restful peace that she hasn't experienced in a long while now. I knew she'd never be tricked into taking a sleeping draught, you see…" Bedilia responded with a genuine smile.
The old woman ran gentle fingers through the golden blonde hair and looked down upon the quiet figure with an expression that was equal parts sadness and admiration. "This one is an inspiration to an old woman like me. So long have we floundered without just one. We have to put her on the path back to those who love her. She'll feel differently about life once she wakes up again. I suggest," Bedilia turned to a slightly stunned Ella, "that we should camp here for the evening." The older woman rose slowly, walking back toward the wagon. She looked around, fully expecting to see the dark-haired woman beside her. Ella still sat beside Gabrielle in a sort of stunned silence. "Who are you?" the slender young woman finally asked in exasperation. * * *
"Oh, shit," Ortolan said to himself. The mystic's words might as well have been shouted from the steps of the Acropolis. They echoed through the halls of Olympus and filtered into Hera's mind, settling there as easily as a feather wafting to the ground. The Goddess was in no position to split her concentration at the moment, but she stored the feeling of anger for later. Hera knew that if Ortolan was upset it meant that something had gone wrong with his controlling connection of her granddaughter's mind. The Amazon bitch was always causing problems, Hera thought to herself. This time, the Goddess was determined to put an end to the small blonde. Ares helped her; he was just stupid enough to believe the lies he told her. The others…they would always believe that it was revenge against the Warrior Princess, but Hera knew the truth. There
were none, especially within the mortal realm, who knew the old ways like Hera did. She'd found the signs quite by accident, but it was apparent to her, of whom the ancient scrolls spoke. There would be only one way to see that the prophecies never happened and that was to wipe Gabrielle and any who followed her from the mortal realm. Hera smiled to herself. What was that expression the humans used? Ahhh, yes. Like shooting fish in a barrel. * * *
"Don't be offended, but I've never heard of you," Ella told the old woman after hearing her story. Bedilia chuckled aloud. "I wouldn't expect you to, child. There are few mortals, with the exception of scholars and bards, who even know of or acknowledge my existence. I stopped being offended long ago by those who have forgotten that I was here before the Gods ever took possession of this mortal realm. Before they were even a thought, before Cronus ever was, my sisters and I had possession of the timeless space this world inhabited." "And here I thought you were just a crazy old woman," Gabrielle's sleepy voice came from the other side of the fire. "Gabrielle!" Ella exclaimed rushing to offer her friend a hug. "How are you?" "Bri!" Tai ran past her mother and jumped into the small blonde's arms. "Was you hurt?" "Yes I was," Gabrielle gave the youngster a hug. "But I feel much better now. Except for this bump on the back of my head," she added in Bedilia's direction. "You know I had the strangest feeling, old woman," Gabrielle smirked, "as I was falling, just before I got conked on the head, that you
were the one who actually hit me." Bedilia smiled affectionately at the small blonde, moving to the other side of the fire and handing the Queen a hot mug of tea. "I'm not sure I should take all the credit, after all, it wasn't me who started the fight, not did I encourage those men to follow us here. I will admit to a bit of mind bending to get you to lose your footing. You're too good, you know. I was beginning to think I'd never get an opportunity to send you to sleep." The young Queen sat cross-legged on the ground, sipping her mug of tea. Tai sat in her lap, the youngster handling the events of the day rather well, considering all that she saw. The child leaned back against Gabrielle's chest, Tai's eyes already growing heavy with fatigue. "Okay, let's take a giant step back here. Why again did you want to knock me out?" Gabrielle asked. "I think, your highness," Bedilia began, watching Gabrielle's eyes widen at the mention of her title. "That perhaps my intentions would be best discussed in private." Ella smiled at both women as she reached forward and scooped her sleeping daughter from Gabrielle's lap. "I have a feeling that's my cue. Don't worry," Ella raised a hand when Gabrielle opened her mouth to explain. "There seems to be a lot more to you than I know, my friend, and frankly, I'm not sure I need to know it all. Go on, you two go take a walk, me and the girls are going to get some sleep." "Are you up for a late night walk?" Gabrielle asked the old woman. "I think the question should be…are you?" Bedilia asked. The old woman's voice held such an ominous tone that Gabrielle had to wonder if she was. * * *
"You idiot!" Hera screamed. "Your Highness…I swear to you, this was not my doing. The Amazon fell and struck her head. I told you this was always a possibility. There were two ways to sever the connection; a blow to the head that would bring about unconsciousness or a sleeping potion." Ortolan spoke quickly, attempting to dissuade the powerful Goddess from following the course of action she had promised should he fail. "Your Highness, there truly was no way for me to anticipate this would happen. I thought perhaps you were watching the Amazon…" "Contrary to human belief, Ortolan," she spat out the mystic's name, "I occasionally have other places I have to be, other interests to pursue. What I'm saying is that I don't have time to watch that fucking brat every candlemark of every day! You had better have something better than this drivel to use in your defense!" "My Queen…the Amazon and her friend stopped in a town. They picked up an old woman on their way out of town, and then they left. A group of soldiers, deserters, attacked them. I did nothing to stop it, it's true, but…I mean, I thought you wanted the Amazon dead?" "Not in the middle of nowhere, you idiot! I wanted her dead where that butch warrior would find her! She was strong enough to resist the planted idea to kill herself, I let you get away with that, you imbecile, but this?! I want Xena to suffer trying to find this one, and then just when she catches up to her, I want Gabrielle to die…slowly and painfully. I want the warrior to see it all and know what it truly means to be helpless." "There was no way to prevent what I didn't know was going to happen, my Queen. I swear; it was simply the will of the Fates."
"What did you say?" Hera's voice turned colder, if that was possible, her pale blue eyes turning into colorless chips of ice. "What…when, I mean, what part?" the mystic stammered. "What old woman?" "Well…she was…I mean, she was a beggar on the side of the road, she-" "Show me!" the Goddess ordered, indicating the scrying bowl before the dark-skinned man. Ortolan breathed a sigh of relief; thankful the Goddess had found someone else to focus her ire on. He concentrated and swirled the waters of the hammered brass dish until the liquid bubbled and steamed. In moments the mist cleared and the mystic honed in on the scene around a campfire. The Amazon Queen, her friend, and the old woman sat around the fire, speaking in low tones. "Are you out of your pathetic, dead mind, Ortolan? Don't you recognize an Odessian witch when you see one! Hera screamed. "I--I didn't even know there was such a thing…" "You absolute moron! You miserable weakling! How could you let that Odessian bitch near Gabrielle?! You have no idea what you've done." "I'm sorry, my Queen…I accept responsibility for my actions…I wasn't aware…I apologize--" Hera sat down on the low marble chair, looking out the open-air balcony, into the mist surrounding Olympus. As Ortolan spoke, she raised her hand, apparently distracted by her own thoughts. The gesture brought forth a massive eunuch, a scimitar like blade within his strong grasp. He raised the blade up and brought it down in one even motion, slicing the
mystic's head from his shoulders. The dark-skinned man's words were cut off in mid sentence, even as the same was happening to his head. The skull rolled along the floor, coming to a stop before the Goddess' chair. "Apology accepted," Hera said in almost a whisper. The Goddess leaned back and tried not to panic. There were always two ways of doing everything. Right about now the old woman was telling Gabrielle everything, well, perhaps not everything. Even the witch wouldn't be that foolish. With her granddaughter's thoughts her own, she would surely journey back to the Amazon village and the Warrior Princess. What to do? The smile that appeared on Hera's face was ever so slight, but her eyes gave away her pleasure. The orbs lost their prosaic tint and warmed to a pale blue color. "Very well," she said aloud, looking directly at the lifeless head at her feet. "We shall adapt, won't we Ortolan? Let the Amazon return to her warrior. I will make it a reunion that Xena will never forget. Oh, yes…I forgot about that…the Teshian River is dry as a bone this summer, isn't it? It would be a tragedy if rain started falling in the mountains…hhmm, the young friend, her children, that stupid witch will live I'm sure, but I'm afraid I see a few people perishing in a slight mishap. I can see it now, my friend," Hera placed her elbow on one knee, leaning toward the lifeless gaze of Ortolan's severed head. "You can just picture it can't you? Xena and the Amazons come upon the river just as Gabrielle is breathing her last. Oh yes, I like this." Hera rose, laughing at her own ingenuity. She kicked the bloody head away from her and her laughter grew louder as she walked out of the room and back toward her own chambers.
CHAPTER 15
"IT'S BEAUTIFUL WHEN the moon is full like this. Xena and I always--" Gabrielle stopped abruptly and looked down at the old woman seated on a large log. "What have I been doing?" "That was the question uppermost in all our minds, until I realized your mind wasn't your own of late." "The things I've done," Gabrielle said, running her hand through her short blonde hair. She sat down heavily beside the old woman, hanging her head low. "The things I've said. How could I believe that Xe would just let me walk out of her life?" "Gabrielle," Bedilia said softly. "It's time for you…" "Time for what?" the Queen raised her head. "To forgive yourself…to show yourself a little of the compassion that you give so willingly to others." The Queen lowered her head again. "And what if I don't deserve forgiveness. I can't help thinking that even though you say I've been under some kind of a spell…well, I can't help thinking that maybe part of the guilt is reasonable. I did…a couple of times I did things that I wasn't supposed to do. I could have hurt my baby…" "Gabrielle," Bedilia said sharply to get the Queen's full attention. "You did nothing to harm your baby." "I think my guilt…some of it anyway…I think it's real, not just from this spell.
A small part of me really believes that I don't deserve any of the good things that have happened to me." "If you thought anything else, felt any other way, you wouldn't be you, Gabrielle," Bedilia said softly. "I wish we had the time to convince you of your goodness and your place in this world, but time is a commodity that is running seriously thin for us, my child." "So, are you going to start at the beginning or am I supposed to just jump into the middle of this story?" Gabrielle asked. "Well, I suppose I can give you the overview now and answer your questions while we travel." The old woman answered. "I didn't lie to you when I told you that my name was Bedilia nor when I said that I was older than time. That charade of me as a beggar woman, well, I hope you'll forgive me that ruse. I knew you, Gabrielle, so much like your father. I knew that you wouldn't be able to refuse me assistance." "You knew my father…my real father?" the Queen asked doubtfully. Bedilia smiled and nudged the young woman's shoulder with her own. "When Apollo was as young and as much trouble as you." Gabrielle smiled, but then suddenly blanched at the thought of her father, still somewhat doubtful that the handsome God forgave Gabrielle for the loss of her baby. "Gabrielle, how many times do I have to tell you that you did nothing wrong? Perhaps I should simply hit the high points and put your mind to rest in certain areas." "You really are a seer, aren't you?" Gabrielle was amazed that the old woman read her thoughts so easily. Her father taught her the technique of constructing a block around her mind so the Gods wouldn't be able to see what she was thinking or even tell where she was. Since Ares hadn't shown himself, she was sure it was working.
Bedilia laughed at that. "Gabrielle, I am one of the first, and there is little in this, or any other realm, which can hide from me. You already know of me, my young bard. When you were nine summers old, a traveling bard told you my story. He had many of the details wrong, but I try not to hold that against them, at least they try. On that fall evening, on the day you turned nine, you studied the stars, praying to the heavens, and asked me to relieve you of your gift. Do you remember that day, Gabrielle?" "I went outside…I told my mother that I was thirsty and wanted a drink of spring water," Gabrielle said, relating the story in hushed tones. "I got on my knees and prayed that the first mother, this woman who came before even Gaia, would take away the gift she'd given me." "And do you remember what that gift was?" "I knew what was going to happen before it ever did," Gabrielle replied, tears filling her eyes. "It was too much. It frightened me and I was tired of being odd. I couldn't keep the visions to myself, sometimes I had to tell, just to help people." "They didn't understand the gift I gave you. I'm sorry it caused you so much pain. I wanted to help. I intended it as a gift to the daughter of Apollo, the child whose own father was forbidden from bestowing any gifts on her. I knew I made a mistake when I heard your prayers that night. It was too much for a young girl, too great a power to possess without guidance. So, I did as you bid. I took back the gift and left in its place a mere speck of that power. The small bit that I left would only come to you in times of life threatening need, usually as dreams. Do you know who I am now, Gabrielle?" "The Oracle of Täan…" Gabrielle whispered, almost as if to herself. That is certainly another name that I am known by," Bedilia smiled. "Xena met you…on Delos." "Yes. I had hoped to warn the Warrior with my words. Forgive me, but my
sisters tell me I am out of touch and my words are too cryptic for mortals to understand. On the other hand, even immortals and Gods have rules they must follow or they throw the universe into a chaotic jumble. It's when they break the rules that I must step in." "I don't understand…you knew all this was going to happen to me…to us?" Gabrielle questioned. Bedilia reached out and placed her withered looking hand upon the smooth skin of Gabrielle's hand. "My sisters contacted me as soon as your fate went awry. I knew what they did not, that a force would be discovered that would be stronger than the fates themselves. The power, for lack of a better word, could only be wielded by the chosen of the ancients. If the power were to be gained and used by another, it would give the user the ability to control mortals as well as other Gods, until the strength of it destroyed all creation. For some, the temptation has been great to possess it. Most died attempting to harness its power." "I take it someone succeeded?" Bedilia nodded her head. "Obviously someone who doesn't care too much for me." Gabrielle looked over at the silent old woman. It didn't take the blonde long to run through a list of sworn enemies. It would have to be a God, someone who hated both she and Xena, someone who had enough hate in their heart to thoughtlessly kill her unborn child. "Hera…" she breathed out with a sigh. "The Queen of the Olympian Gods," Bedilia confirmed. * * *
"That bitch took my baby…did this to me?" Gabrielle stood up quickly, the muscles in her shoulders tightening as her hands clenched into fists. "Xena? Did she experience the same kind of emotional manipulation as I did?" she asked, worried about her wife's fate. "Yes, it was Hera, but she didn't take your child's life force, she simply stopped the baby's life. It gets rather complicated I'm afraid, but a child created of the union between you and the Warrior Princess, is much too dangerous for Hera to keep alive. That's another tale, however." Bedilia added cryptically. "As for your Consort, she is finally coming to her senses as well. Even as we speak, Xena is sipping a tea with a sleeping draught in it. In both your cases, an involuntary sleep is enough to break the connection with whomever Hera recruited to do this job." "She'll be all right, then? Will she still…when she left she…" "Xena's actions were induce by Hera just as yours were. The doubt, guilt, pain…they all increased tenfold, causing you to believe them." "That's why my head and my heart were telling me two different things," Gabrielle pondered. "Correct. Your Consort's love and devotion for you still exists, and it burns just as brightly as it ever did." Gabrielle nodded her head, a feeling like relief washing over her. Her jaw tightened when she thought about the Goddess. "So, Hera wanted my baby dead. She got her wish," Gabrielle's voice now had a hard edge to it. "She had Xena and I separated and miserable. What does she hope to gain, especially now that we know what she's doing?" "She's not done yet, Gabrielle. Hera knows that as long as you and Xena both exist, and the fact that you are half Goddess yourself, there will always exist the chance of you carrying Xena's child. The only way for to ensure that is to kill one or the both of you. I expect, being that she has a penchant for revenge, she will want to kill you first, making it clear to Xena who was responsible for your demise."
"That makes sense," Gabrielle turned her face away from the old woman. "My father, why hasn't he come to me? Why couldn't Artemis heal my baby? I don't understand some of this." "Gabrielle, there are many questions unanswered for us all. Even I am not all seeing and all knowing. I am powerful, I admit, but even my power has limits and restriction" "I know…interference, the world, and the chaos thing, right?" Bedilia chuckled at the young woman's offbeat sense of humor during a most difficult time. "Indeed. I can only do so much. Beside the restriction to the use of my powers, I find that I am not privy to certain forces that I would usually have command of. I fear that is due to Hera's grasp of the ancient scrolls. It seems apparent that, added to her already considerable power, she may have learned to harness a certain strength against her own kind." "So, she's truly become the Queen of the Gods…she finally got her wish," Gabrielle responded bitterly. "I fear for Apollo. We've been unable to reach him. I have learned that Hera is once again using Ares in her plans. He was seen piloting your father's chariot." "So, father hasn't been responsible for the sun rising?" "No. I think Hera knows that if she destroys you, she must destroy him as well. It's important, Gabrielle, that you continue to use your will to block the Gods from your mind," Bedilia said, already knowing of the young woman's attempts. "It's always possible it will work against us. We could use a little Godly power on our behalf, but if one of them knows where you are, all of them will know. So far, I can only assume that Hera doesn't know exactly where you're at." "I don't understand. If Ares is helping Hera to kill me, why would he suddenly help me?" Gabrielle asked.
Bedilia looked up in surprise. "It just goes to show you that I don't see everything," she replied. "When did this happen?" "Back in the Amazon village," Gabrielle turned away in shame. "I tried to kill myself…to cut my wrists open. Ares stopped me and placed some sort of spell over me so that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't harm myself." "Well, that does put a new spin on things, doesn't it?" the old woman commented. "Gabrielle, we must start back to the Amazons at once. Whatever Hera has planned, you and Xena will both be stronger if you're together." "I agree. I want Xe to know I'm all right. I'll need to talk to Ella about all of this first," the Queen replied. Bedilia nodded and smiled sadly. "I think if you ask her the right questions, my dear, you'll find that she won't be all that adverse to living among your Amazons. Now, we have a number of plans to make before morning. Sit back down here and let me tell you a few things," the old woman patted the log where she sat. The two talked for another three candlemarks, until the moon was dropping low into the horizon. Gabrielle began to wonder how she could have ever mistaken Bedilia for an uneducated beggar woman. They planned a route back to Amazonia, their heads held close, whispering as if the very woods around them could hear. * * *
"Ella?" Gabrielle whispered, placing a gentle hand on the woman's shoulder. Gabrielle had thrown another log on the fire when she returned to camp. Now she kneeled beside her sleeping friend, trying to rouse her without
waking the children. "Gabrielle? Wha--?" "Sshh, it's okay. I just needed to talk with you before morning." Ella blinked her eyes a few times, trying to adjust from sleep to the waking world. She noticed the predawn gray of the sky and gave a wry smile to the small blonde. "Gabrielle, it is morning." "Sorry," Gabrielle gave a little half smile. Ella took note of the red-rimmed eyes on the young woman, instantly alarmed. "Gabrielle, are you okay? Have you been crying?" "Yea, but it's all right. Yes, I'm okay…or at least I will be…I think. Sorry, to be so cryptic," Gabrielle sat down beside Ella and smiled. "I did have a good cry, but I think I needed it. There's a lot I haven't dealt with," she looked up in embarrassment. "You were right. Grieving isn't the same thing as surviving and surviving is nothing at all like living." Ella breathed a sigh of relief. She finally saw something in the young Queen that she hadn't been able to before. Gabrielle looked relaxed. There was a tense line gone from around her mouth. The blonde still appeared apprehensive, but Ella was convinced that her friend had experienced some sort of hope from Bedilia's prophecies. "I'm glad you're looking at things differently. What will you do now?" Ella asked. Gabrielle heard the hesitant, almost frightened undertone in the question. Once Bedilia told the Queen that her loved ones would accept her with open arms, Gabrielle never even considered that Ella might not want to go with her. She has her own family to go to, Gabrielle thought to herself as she prepared to explain things to her friend.
"…if you ask her the right questions…" Bedilia's words, from only a few candlemarks ago, came back to Gabrielle. Okay…let's just barrel in and see if I hit on the right question. "Ella, I have to go back," Gabrielle answered honestly. "Not because I have to, but because I finally realized there are people who love me back there. Someone in particular whom I love a great deal." "I had a feeling that would be your answer," Ella responded. "I don't know whether to be sad or elated. I'm really very glad you're going back to your people. I think they need someone like you and I bet they miss having you around." "Well, that's debatable. They may say it depends on what phase of the moon it is," the blonde grinned. "Ella, I know you have a sister in Abdera, but I've grown rather fond of you…and the children. Being around you has been like having my sister Lila to pal around with…" "Gabrielle," Ella placed her hand on Gabrielle's arm. "You don't have to feel obligated at all. We'll be okay on our own." "You mean with your sister, right?" "Um, yea…of course, that's what I mean," Ella answered nervously.
"…if you ask her the right questions…" "Ella…you don't have a sister in Abdera, do you?" "No," the dark-haired woman shook her head back and forth slowly. "You shouldn't worry, though, Gabrielle. Tai, Emery, and I…we're survivors." "Ella…you were the one who told me that surviving isn't living, it's simply existing. Don't you want more for your girls?" "I--" Ella opened her mouth to explain, to refute her own words in some way.
"My friend, the Amazon village could use someone like you. Besides, I kind of like having you around too," Gabrielle interrupted. "But, Gabrielle…" Ella lowered her voice to an embarrassed whisper. "I don't like women that way…I mean, I like men." Gabrielle laughed aloud, clapping a hand over her mouth to stop the noise. "Well, there's no accounting for taste," the Queen replied flippantly. "Ella, I'm teasing! You don't have to sleep with women to be an Amazon, although it does help because women are all who live there," she grinned again. "I thought," Ella began sheepishly. "No. In fact, we have a number of women and their families living within the protection of the Village. You don't even have to become an Amazon. Trust me, you should see the way half the women in the Village drool whenever Hercules and Iolus come around." "Hercules? The son of Zeus…you know him?" Ella asked, astounded. "He's a very good friend," Gabrielle smiled. "It's a long story, actually. Ella, I do have to warn you. Coming with me may be dangerous. You see, Hercules isn't the only God, technically Demigod, but still…I'm just trying to say that--" "Gabrielle, I've heard some of the stories about you and Xena, remember? I think I'll take my chances with you and the Amazons, no matter what Gods we have to go through to get there." Gabrielle reached over and hugged her friend, tears filling her eyes. "You know, Xena once told me that we have two kinds of families, the one we're born into and the one we create along the journey of life. I just want you to know that I couldn't care about you more if you were my own sister." "Oh, Gabrielle." Ella returned the hug.
"Just don't tell my sister, Lila I said that," the Queen grinned. Bedilia entered the campsite just as Emery made the fact that she was awake and hungry known. "I take that sound to mean it's time for breakfast…for us all, eh?" the spry old woman began to lay out there breakfast as the two younger women realized who was now in charge of their little party. * * *
"Hera…what's going on here?" Ares strode into the Goddess' private chambers. "I thought this whole thing was about getting Apollo to grovel and apologize…you know a little humiliation for what he did to you on Delos." "Ares, don't you ever announce yourself first," Hera answered coldly. The leather clad God stood there, shifting his weight uneasily. He'd been full of bravado when he thought about confronting his mother, but now that he was actually in front of her, the pale blue eyes staring at him with contempt, he had to wonder if this was such a bright idea. I don't believe it…just like when we were five. Every time I let Apollo talk me into something, I end up getting my ass kicked, and there's nothing worse than getting your ass kicked by a chick. "How long am I supposed to do the chariot thing? I mean, isn't it about time you let Apollo go? This is getting to be a serious pain in the ass. Between you and me," he crossed his arms against his chest, "it's putting a serious crimp in my style." Hera stood and crossed the room. She wasn't a tall woman, but her bearing certainly filled the room. She glared at Ares, her gaze hard. She
never spoke, never blinked; she simply waited to see who would acquiesce first. The God of War was the first to flinch, even as he cursed himself for giving in. He knew what few of the other Olympians knew, however, that Hera, the Queen of the Gods had suddenly become more powerful than any two of them combined. The pecking order on Olympus just changed, as Hera truly became the strongest God, second only to Zeus. Hera smiled, satisfied that she'd won this small battle of wills. "You're not in a position to demand anything, Ares. If you wish to continue on in your position as the God of War, then I suggest you change the tone in your voice from demanding to pleading," Hera's icy voice said. This means only one thing, Ares thought to himself, out of the reach of Hera's probing mind. Looks like I'm going to be doing some major ass kissing! "Hey, let's not lose our heads about this, huh? I just want you to know where I stand on--" "Don't make me laugh, Ares!" Hera turned to pace the room. The need for her weakling son was soon ending and Hera no longer found it necessary to beat around the bush with him. The time for subtlety had come to a close. "You and I both know that your interest in helping me was merely to get you closer to the Warrior Princess. That abomination of a mortal woman stands between me and what I want. If you wish to stand with her, then you're both against me. Not a good place to be, Ares." "You never said anything about Xena. All you ever said--" "Don't be such an idiot! Do you really think that I have any intention of releasing Apollo?" Hera turned and walked through the marble columned room. "Do you think I'm going to let that half breed daughter of his live? Now, even you're not this stupid, Ares. Let me say this slowly so
your tiny brain can grasp this. Apollo will die…Gabrielle will die…and Xena will most certainly die. Anyone who stands against me will fall and traitors will be dealt with swiftly and severely." Ares stood there fighting every impulse to lash out at the Goddess. She was insane; he knew that now. The only problem was that she had the power to back it up. "Now, tell me, Ares, what part of that don't you understand?" "I just thought that what I could do is--" Hera crossed the room and sat upon a cushioned recliner, three young women rushed over to serve the Goddess, seeing to her comfort. "What you can do is what you're told." "But, I--" "Ares!" Hera turned her back on the dark-haired God. "Be a good boy and go polish your sword or something." He debated this time. No, better leave it be, he didn't get to be the God of War by jumping into every battle. Sometimes you have to choose when and where you'll fight. There was never any shame in living to fight another day. Ares left in a flash of blue, listening to the sound of Hera's evil laughter. The leather clad God appeared within the small cavern outside the makeshift prison that held Apollo and Morpheus. "Ares," Apollo tried to sit up fully, pulling against his bonds. "Did you find Gabrielle?" "Nope, she's still incommunicado. Why you had to teach her how to block a mind probe is beyond me…what were you thinking?"
"Ares, if you just came here to gloat or to be Hera's message boy, I'm sorry, but I just don't care anymore," the sandy-haired man replied in a dejected tone. "Now, little bro…is that anyway to treat your favorite big brother?" Ares face grew serious and he moved closer to the bars, examining them as they shimmered and pulsed. "I've got a plan I think you're gonna like," Ares grinned as he examined the illusionary prison bars once more.
CHAPTER 16
"HYAH!" Xena's cry spurred Argo faster, the horse's gait much steadier now that they were on the dirt road. The warrior hadn't pushed her horse this fast, this far, in a long while. Eponin's mare was having a hard time keeping up, but Xena didn't dare slow the pace. She could sense it now, an ominous feeling of foreboding. She seemed to feel a lot now…since whoever had control of her mind and her dreams had been temporarily defeated.
Well, maybe not defeated…slowed down, she thought. Xena knew one thing for sure. She and Gabrielle amassed quite a few enemies over the seasons, both mortal and God. Whichever one of them was responsible for the death of her child, and any harm that might come to her wife, they weren't about to give up after failing with her.
Gods, Brie…what have they done to you? My heart…what have I done to you?
Xena had plenty of time to curse and berate herself. She cut the day long journey in half, but that still left plenty of time in which to go over the things that she would have done differently, the things she said to Gabrielle that she would like to take back. She scolded herself nonstop, not allowing her common sense to kick in and explain to her obstinate brain that she'd been under another's influence. That would never do for the Warrior Princess. She was an expert at accepting guilt, and when it came to Gabrielle, Xena already felt as if she failed her wife in some way. She should have done more, been stronger…smarter. The sun was midway in the sky by the time they reached Amazon territory. Eponin and Xena fairly flew by the stunned sentries, who didn't know who they were at first. It was only Eponin cries of; "The Queen's in danger!" which saved them from a volley of arrows shot their way. Ephiny was out of her hut by the time Xena and Eponin skidded to a halt in the middle of the Village. "What's wrong?" Ephiny said to Xena's back. The warrior jumped off Argo and was already on her way to the home she and Gabrielle shared. "Xena says that Gabrielle's in trouble," Eponin answered. "What?" Ephiny responded, obviously confused. Xena raced back to where Ephiny stood, fear apparent in the dark-haired warrior's facial features. "Where's Gabrielle," Xena asked breathlessly. "Where's Gabrielle?" Ephiny echoed. "Well, she's with…" Ephiny looked between Eponin and Xena. "…she's not with you?" "With us?" Xena was trying hard to control her emotions. "I left Gabrielle here in the Village a week ago. What's going on, Eph?" "Gabrielle left the day after you did," the Regent explained to a stunned Consort. "She went to be with you on the hunt."
"Well she never made it," Xena's jaw tightened. "What did she say, exactly?" "Well, I never talked to her directly," the Regent's eyes began to take on a concerned look. "She left me a scroll, saying she changed her mind and that she needed to be with you. I didn't worry since Callas and Lara, two of the Royal Guard, went with her." Eponin looked at Xena, the Consort turning her face away for a moment to rein in her anger. "Eph, Callas and Lara weren't guarding the Queen this week. They were supposed to head up to our campsite the day after we left to bring the rest of the supplies," Eponin said softly. "Oh no," Ephiny breathed out, finally realizing the possibilities. "Gabrielle was in such a fragile state of mind…I should have questioned her decision, I--" "You let your Queen just stroll out of the protection of the Village!" Xena turned angry eyes toward the Amazon. "Hades balls! Do you mean to tell me that not one of her Guard, not one sentry even knew it?!" the warrior shouted. "It's not like Gabrielle hasn't been trained as an Amazon and a warrior, she's certainly skilled enough to--," Ephiny began. "And who taught her how to be a bad ass Amazon?" Xena interrupted. "Who taught her how to be a warrior?!" the Regent shot back. The two women took a step toward one another. "Okay, okay," Eponin stepped directly in between both warriors. "Laying blame and arguing about who did what is not helping us here." "That's right," Xena agreed, still glaring at Ephiny. "We need to question
everyone, see if anyone knows anything, try to narrow down whether Gabrielle was abducted or left of her own will." "Yes, your Highness," Ephiny answered. Xena raised an eyebrow. There was no animosity in the Regent's voice, but Xena couldn't understand Ephiny agreeing with her. They were usually always at odds when it came to Gabrielle. "Okay, what's going on? Are you patronizing me or working with me?" Xena asked suspiciously. "Xena, I acknowledge that the fault lies with me over Gabrielle's disappearance, I accept the consequences that should befall me over this. With your permission, I'll begin by questioning the members of the Royal Guard?" Xena was completely nonplussed by the Regent's demeanor. She could only nod and watch Ephiny turn and stiffly walk away. "What the hell was that?" Xena looked at Eponin. The Amazon shifted her weight from foot to foot. "Xena, Ephiny is the Queen's Regent…she serves only when the Queen assigns her that duty upon leaving the village. When something happens to the Queen, however, the throne becomes the responsibility of her heir." "Gabrielle doesn't have an heir, you know that." "Right…that means that you're the acting Queen, until Gabrielle is found, at least. Eph is having an attack of the guilts; you know she thinks of Gabrielle as a kid sister. Plus, she knows that you outrank her." "Oh, swell!" Xena exclaimed. "All right, you don't have to look at me that way, I'll talk to her…later. Right now, I want to see what Adia has to say. She was supposed to spend some time with Gabrielle. Can you start questioning people, anyone who might have seen anything unusual after we left?"
"Sure thing, Xena," Eponin didn't have to ask twice. The next time Xena saw the Amazon; she was in front of the food hut, questioning the cooks. Xena wanted to smile, despite the circumstances. Knowing Gabrielle, Eponin was trying to start in the most likely place. Xena didn't have to go far. By the time she was making her way to the edge of the Village, and the Healer's hut, she spied Adia coming toward her. "Xena, I'm so sorry, I should have known," were the first words out of the Healer's mouth. "It's okay, Adia…I've been saying that a lot lately." * * *
"Anything you can tell me will help," Xena said to the Healer. The two women moved off into the forest. All of Xena's instincts screamed inside her to just jump on Argo and take off after her wife. This time her sensibilities won. What direction would she go? Did Gabrielle leave of her own will or was she kidnapped? The warrior forced herself to relax and think. She needed to ask these questions of Adia and the others before starting out impulsively. She took the time and she and Adia stopped along the stream to talk. Xena explained what she and Sartori already discovered regarding a mind manipulation and the sleeping draught that broke the psychic link. "We only talked the day you left. She was so despondent. You were there; you saw the nightmares she was having. Gods, I can't believe I never though about Godly intervention…I knew this wasn't like Gabrielle, well not entirely anyway."
What's that supposed to mean?" "When you and I were in Gabrielle's dreamscape, remember?" Adia prompted and Xena nodded her head. "After I talked to Gabrielle the last time, I finally figured out why she was unable to end her dream. Now, with what you're telling me about someone manipulating her thoughts and dreams, it makes sense. If Gabrielle felt the same way about losing her child as you did, if she was able to come to terms with it a little better, the herbs I gave her for the dream quest would have broken the mental link, just as the tea you drank did." "That's right. Why didn't it?" Adia looked uncomfortable at the warrior's inquiry. "Xena, you know I wouldn't tell you this unless I thought a lot rode on the outcome." "Adia," Xena laid a gentle hand on the Healer's arm. "I would never ask you to discuss what you and Gabrielle spoke of, but this could be my wife's life we're talking about." Adia nodded silently. "Gabrielle couldn't break free of the mind link for the same reason a person can't change anything about their dreamscape if any part of it appeals to them." "Are you trying to tell me Gabrielle did hurt our baby?" Xena asked haltingly. "No, absolutely not. As a Healer, I would say that Gabrielle did nothing to harm your child, Xena. No, what appealed to Gabrielle, on an unconscious level was the guilt. She truly thought she was guilty, aside from the thoughts that were being put into her head and her dreams." "I don't understand." "After you left, Gabrielle confided that she didn't follow all the directions on inactivity that Tori and you must have given her. She was absolutely certain that it was one of those incidents that did harm to the baby."
"That's ridiculous, Brie knows better than that," Xena furrowed her brow, attempting to remember the times she scolded her wife for any heavy lifting. "You and I both know that doing a few things that are bad for you couldn't possibly be the cause of delivering a stillborn baby. Has Gabrielle ever been around babies or pregnant women? I know we treated her like she was glass, but that's simply because she's the Queen." "No, she's never been around enough pregnant women to know that most of us have our babies, and then go back out into battle," Xena whispered to herself. "I took her away from her village before she had a chance for that." "Look, there isn't time for you to take on anymore guilt, my friend," Adia replied sharply. "We're all responsible for putting our Queen on that pedestal, all right? I'm just trying to tell you that Gabrielle did nothing to harm your baby, but she believes she did. It's her belief in her guilt that won't let her out of the mind link completely, even with sedation. Even if we can manage to break the connection, a part of her still believes this as truth and I'm afraid of what it might eventually cause her to do." Adia saw the fear light up in Xena's eyes. "I'm not trying to frighten the wits out of you, Xena. I'm just trying to tell you that until Gabrielle resolves this in her own mind, it may affect her decisions, especially about protecting herself. She may get the very misplaced notion that giving her life to save someone else's would atone for what she perceives as her sin. Plus, I don't think Gabrielle was abducted. My gut feeling is that she left. In her mind, she was probably sparing everyone from having to live with someone so unworthy of life." "I think I agree with you," Xena said, rising quickly from her seated position atop the rocks. "I'm going back to the Village. I need to see what Ep and Ephiny found out. If this is what we suspect," Xena said as she and the Healer began to jog back in the direction of the Village, "then I need to figure out where she would go first and take off in a hurry."
Xena went back to the house she and Gabrielle shared to find Ephiny already there. "Sorry, I didn't mean to intrude…I thought maybe I could get an idea about-" "Eph, I'm sorry too. You know how I get when it comes to Gabrielle. I was wrong back there, I shouldn't have jumped all over you." "I'm sorry, too, Xena. I guess I felt more than a little guilty for letting Gabrielle down…for letting you down." "I think we're all riding the guilt trip wagon right about now, Eph, no one more than me." Xena explained what she and Adia spoke of and her suspicions about Gabrielle leaving on her own. "I think that makes sense. She certainly didn't take anything with her, not even her staff," Ephiny commented. Xena looked carefully through the small house. Gabrielle's clothes were neatly stacked in a chest at the foot of the bed. The only articles of clothing missing were her hunting clothes. Her scrolls were neatly stacked in a straw chest beside the Queen's desk, her staff leaning beside the door where it always stood. Xena opened the small wooden box that Gabrielle kept the small pieces of jewelry she owned. The warrior fingered the Queen's Amazon necklace, strung with a variety of beads and feathers. There were some hair combs and bracelets, most all of them gifts that Xena purchased for her bard over the seasons. Xena was glad about not seeing the ring from Apollo and the pendant the warrior fashioned for Gabrielle. Xena unconsciously toyed with her own necklace, thankful her wife still wanted to keep that item with her. Ephiny watched as Xena stood in the middle of the room, attempting to gather just one additional bit of information to go on. The warrior noticed
something unusual in the fireplace and crossed the room to get a better look. Stooping down, she retrieved what her eyes had spied out. Lying in the unused fireplace were long lengths of Gabrielle's golden hair. Tears spilled from Xena's eyes at the thought of her beloved wife, so downhearted and unhappy that she would run away, hide from those who loved and cared for her most. Xena stood up and turned around to face Ephiny, not bothering to hide the tears on her face. "She's run away," Xena said brokenly. "I think she's trying to change who she is so I won't be able to find her." "Then that just shows how much she needs you…needs all of us, Xena," Ephiny reminded the warrior. "Let's go," Xena suddenly said, moving to leave the hut, but not before she grabbed a piece of cloth and wrapped the golden hair in it, carefully storing it in a chest of her belongings. "Me, Ep and half a dozen others, no more," Xena said as she re-saddled Argo. One of the stable girls had taken care of the beautiful mare as soon as the warrior let go of the animal's reins. "Any more than that and we'll just slow down," Xena explained to Ephiny. "Perhaps we should send scouts to Amphipolis or Potidaea," Ephiny suggested. "Not a bad idea, just in case," Xena continued to settle Argo's saddle in place, cinching it around the mare's belly. "I don't think we're likely to find her in either of those places, though. She's dressed different, has cut her hair, and the only weapons I see missing are the sais Adia gave her. She's trying to hide out, or at the very least, not be recognized for who she is. I think home is the first place she'd think that I'd look and the last place she'd go." "I'd like to go with, Xena," Ephiny said in a pleading tone.
"Eph, this has nothing to do with what went on earlier, but with Gabrielle and I both away, I need you to stay here. Besides, if something should happen to Brie and I…the Village will need you." Ephiny walked alongside the warrior as she led Argo outside, into the center of the Village. They found Eponin waiting, having already chosen six of the best warriors the Amazons had to offer. Xena raised an eyebrow at the women gathered there, then stared at Eponin. "Hey, what can I say, I know how you think," the weapons master grinned. "Take care, may Artemis be with all of you," Ephiny said as the warriors mounted their horses. "Xena," Ephiny took the dark-haired woman's hand within her own. "She's out there on her own and she doesn't believe in herself. She left her staff and everything that marks her as an Amazon behind. That's a bad combination." "I'll find her," Xena answered, spurring Argo out of the Village. Ephiny's smile was genuine. It encouraged her heart to hear the confidence in Xena's voice. She knew that if Xena were determined to get Gabrielle back, the Gods themselves would be hard pressed to stop her. * * *
"Okay, let me get this straight," Gabrielle stood with her hands on her hips, glaring at the women who surrounded her. "I'm about to face down the Queen of the Gods and you're all just going to leave me on my own?" The small blonde glared at the three women the mortal world knew as the Fates, Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos. They came to claim their sister, Bedilia, assuring Gabrielle this was a matter that affected her as well. Ella sat silently atop the wagon, watching in awe.
"Well, I have to say I'm not too thrilled with your timing," Gabrielle shook her head. "We anticipate that Hera won't attempt anything until she realizes you've returned to the Amazon Village," Lachesis responded. "Bedilia," Gabrielle looked to the old woman. "Do you see anything that can help me?" "I'm afraid, my dear, that my powers are rather limited in this instance. Hera seems to be blocking me from her intentions, just as you have the ability to wall off your own thoughts from the Gods. I tend to agree with my sisters, however. I don't see Hera making any moves until she can get you and Xena together. You should prepare your people once you return." "I think we need to tell her," Bedilia turned to her sisters. All three women looked rather perturbed.
Perhaps you should… Communicate with us… Without involving the mortals. "That seems rude, doesn't it?" Bedilia answered her sisters. Atropos shook her head from side to side. "You have been too long among them, Bedilia." The old woman chuckled. "And you, my sisters, have been too long with only yourselves as company. I say this as a compliment my sisters. What you have initiated for the Queen and her Consort…it is the most human thing you have ever done." The Fates were left speechless by their sister's words. It hadn't seemed exceptionally noble of them, only the repayment of a debt. They admitted there were underlying motives. The death of Xena and Gabrielle's baby
was not a part of the child's fate. The sisters were determined to fight against a force that had the power to go against the will of the Fates. There was also the matter of the way the threads of life ran together. The young Amazon Queen's thread was a perfect example of the way one life force could affect so many others. The child known as Brianna was to have that affect on others. Her thread would touch many as it wove its way along a path meant only for her. "I do hate to interrupt, especially since I think I'm only getting part of this conversation, but what is it I need to be told?" Gabrielle questioned Bedilia. The three Fates nodded and Bedilia spoke. "It seems, Gabrielle, that my sisters have found your father." "Father?" Gabrielle took a step forward, her demeanor instantly changing. Suddenly the young woman turned from hardened warrior, to her father's daughter. "It appears as if Hera is responsible for Apollo's absence," Bedilia answered. "Something we suspected all along. "He is alive, Gabrielle, but Hera's intention is to kill him," Lachesis spoke aloud to the Queen. "We need Bedilia's power to assist in acquiring Apollo's freedom." "My ring," Gabrielle held out her hand to the women. "My father gave me this ring to call him when I needed him. Perhaps if I used it?" "It would do no good, my dear," Bedilia answered. "Apollo is surrounded by a spell with considerable age and strength to it." "Can you reverse it?" Gabrielle asked, concern evident in her gaze. "It was I who created it for Apollo, long ago to protect the Elixir of Life. If I can find a way to slip past Hera's defenses, I'm confident that I can. Gods are curious beings Gabrielle and sometimes assistance can come from
the unlikeliest of sources," Bedilia smiled mysteriously. The young Queen knew better than to question the oracle further. Gabrielle moved forward to hug the old woman. "Thank you. Now what are you still doing here…go on, get out of here," she said with a smile. * * *
Two days passed before Gabrielle and Ella were back near Pella. Tai was more excited than ever, constantly asking for stories about the Amazon Village where they would live. The two adults talked about everything under the sun. Gabrielle found that having someone who had no preconceived notions about her past made for an easy person to talk to. She shared a number of her fears over the situation at hand, even surprising herself by revealing her parentage to a very stunned Ella. The slender, dark-haired woman seemed to take it all in stride, however. "Thank you, Gabrielle," Ella said, breaking the silence of the morning. "You're welcome. For what?" Gabrielle grinned. Ella chuckled slightly. Gabrielle seemed much less like a warrior now. The blonde's smile shone through brighter and the haunting look of pain in her eyes was greatly diminished. She seemed more content, even relaxed. Ella had to wonder at the strength and courage one would have to possess to do what this young Queen was doing. She was saddled with a woman and her two children, possibly riding right into the middle of a fight with the Queen of the Gods. The dark-haired woman could do no more than smile. "Thank you for everything. I feel like my life has changed so much since I met you. I prayed at night that no matter what would happen to me, as long as my girls grew up safe and healthy, and happy, I would be thankful. I feel like you're a part of that somehow. Offering us a place in your Village and with your people…I think it may make all the difference in their lives," she
indicated the two children in the back of the wagon. "That's what friends do for each other, Ella," Gabrielle replied. "Oh, lovely!" Ella stared straight ahead, pulling the wagon to a halt. Gabrielle followed her friend's gaze to the bridge that crossed the Teshian River. The wooden structure was in a state that was beyond repair. It looked like a lightning bolt had literally come from the sky and destroyed half the bridge. "Lovely is right! It'll take us at least another two days to follow the valley and go around. I've never been that way. I'm not even sure I can get us there from here." "Gabrielle, the riverbed looks as dry as stone. Could we try crossing down there?" Ella pointed down the steep bank. The Queen looked down into the riverbed. The hot, dry summer took its toll on many of the creeks and rivers, this one being no exception. "It looks a little steep, but I think we might be able to handle it if we empty out the wagon a bit. It doesn't look too bad on the other side. See that sandy bank over there?" Gabrielle raised her hand and Ella followed the direction the blonde pointed. "If we can steer for that area of the bank, I think we'll be okay." The first step was to relieve the wagon of excess weight. By the time they sat Tai to watch her sister and unloaded the heaviest items from the wagon, Gabrielle actually began to believe they could succeed. "You stay up here with the girls and I'll drive the wagon," Gabrielle said, preparing to climb into the farm cart. "Gabrielle, that doesn't make much sense. I'm the one who's spent all my life driving these things. How long has it been since you drove a wagon? Besides, I can't ride Lightning, you'd have to walk back again to get her." "Point taken," Gabrielle admitted grudgingly. "Okay, you get the wagon
across, then once you're safe on the other side, I'll bring Tai and Emery with me on Lightning." "Okay…let's do it," Ella said happily. Ella was stronger than Gabrielle gave her credit for being. The dark-haired woman leaned backward; tendons in her arms standing out in an effort to guide the wagon safely down the steep slope. The wagon tilted precariously on its way down the steep embankment, but Ella kept a firm hand on the reins. Finally, she reached the bottom of the dry riverbed and began to cross the wide river. "It's not as dry as we though…kind of muddy," Ella shouted back, "but I should be okay if the wagon keeps rolling." Gabrielle watched as the wagon began to slow down, eventually the wagon became mired altogether. "Dry as stone, huh?" she shouted out to her friend." The Queen saw the wagon was slowly sinking, not by much, but enough. It was settling into the mud of the riverbed and suddenly Gabrielle was concerned. She moved the basket Emery slept in so that it was protected by some bushes. "Tai, you stay here and watch Emery, okay? I have to take Lightning out there and help your mom. Can you sit here and do that for me?" "'Kay, Bri," the child stood beside her sleeping sister, pretending she was on guard duty. Gabrielle coiled a piece of rope they unloaded from the wagon, jumped on Lightning, and let the horse feel his way across the mucky ground. "The wagon's sinking!" she exclaimed, sliding from the stallion's back and immediately sinking up to her ankles in the soft dirt. "It's silt," she explained. "Like on the bottom of the Nile. It can be quite deep. We've got to get this thing moving or we'll lose it."
"Let me help," Ella moved to get off the wagon. "No, you steer it out. I'm going to tie this rope to the front rig. Lightning should be strong enough to pull it if I help from down here." The blonde had trouble getting her footing in the mud, but she tied off the rope, one end to the harness on the wagon, the other on Lightning's saddle. "Okay, let's give it a try," Gabrielle positioned herself in front of the white stallion, holding his front halter. "Now!" Ella snapped the reins against her mares back and felt the wagon ease from the mud a bit, but then it slowly slipped back down. They were trying to move slightly uphill so the grade wasn't helping them. "Wait," Gabrielle shouted and eased back on her animals halter. Gabrielle moved around to the back of the wagon. Only one of the wheels was buried further into the mud than the others. "Let's try it again. Lightning knows what to do and I'll see if my giving it a push from this end helps." Gabrielle positioned herself at the back wheel. If she braced her foot against the outside of the wheel and pushed the wagon up as the horses where pulling, she thought it might work. Each time she set her foot, her muddy boots slipped through the spokes in the wagon. Eventually, she planted her foot, but raised her head when she heard a familiar sound. "Do you hear that?" Gabrielle asked. "Yes, faintly. It sounds like thunder, but from a long way off. Horses maybe?" "Could be. We better do it this time…I don't get a good feeling about this," Gabrielle answered. "Okay, now!" The wagon inched forward under the strain of both horses and Gabrielle
pulled at the spokes of the wheel with her hands, pressing up with her back against the bottom of the wagon. Just as she felt the wooden vehicle begin to move forward, the sound of thunder filled her ears. "Gabrielle!" Ella screamed as the small blonde looked up. The thundering sound was accompanied by a wall of water rushing directly toward them. It happened so fast that by the time Gabrielle straightened her body up, the freezing cold water was rushing all around them.
Flash flood! Gabrielle remembered Xena telling her once what could happen to a dry riverbed once it began raining in the mountains. By the time these thoughts filtered through her brain, the wagon was tipping over from the force of the water rushing around them. "Ella!" Gabrielle watched as the wagon came down on its side toward her. Ella leaned forward, a knife in her hand. She was slicing through the leather harness and ropes, in order to free the animals from the weight of the wagon. "Ella let go!" Gabrielle shouted, holding onto the side of the wagon as the surge of pounding water sought to drive her down river. Gabrielle's foot slipped through the spokes of the wheel and as the wagon tilted over further and further, the wheel sank into the mud more, imprisoning the young woman's ankle. With an additional surge of water, the wagon slipped again with a violent jerk, throwing Ella into the water, the rigging carried by the rush of water, falling on top of her. "Ella!" Gabrielle screamed again, using her hands to pull on her own leg, trying to free her ankle from the wagon as it continued to slowly sink. She tugged once more and felt the ring her father gave her, slip from her finger. " No!" she cried out. All the weight she'd lost caused the ring to literally fall
from her hand. The dark head bobbed to the surface, gasping for air, the knife still in her hand. Ella clutched at the side of the wagon, but that merely caused the cart to move onto its side more and Gabrielle screamed as it bent her ankle along the way. "I'm caught!" Ella shouted over the sound of the water. The dark-haired woman was struggling to stay afloat. The rigging that threatened to carry her away, tangled about her below the surface of the water. Each new rush of water dragged her below the surface, but her only purchase was on the side of the wagon. Ella's weight on the side of the wooden vehicle pulled it over, further into the water, pressing Gabrielle's trapped foot down into the mud. The water was now up to Gabrielle's chest, but when Ella's weight toppled the wagon over, it pushed the blonde head beneath the surface. "Hang on, Ella!" Gabrielle tried to push the wagon back against the water that continued to charge down river. It was impossible to get any leverage with the water knocking her off balance, aside from the fact that each time Ella took hold of the wagon; her weight pulled the vehicle over so that it pushed Gabrielle under the water. It took some quick communication between two women to arrange things so each of them could stay above the surface of the water. Gabrielle bore the brunt of this arrangement, however. By pressing her shoulders and back to the wagon's side, she could keep it from toppling over and at the same time, Ella could hold on to bring her head above water. Ella could see that Gabrielle was tiring. Their teeth chattered as they spoke, the freezing water swirling around them. The dark-haired woman shouted to Tai, the young girl standing crying on the riverbank. Ella called out to her daughter, trying to offer reassurances to the youngster. She knew, however, that if she and Gabrielle continued on this way, chances were slim that either of them would survive. Tears ran down the woman's cheeks realizing it would leave her girls alone and leagues from anyone
who could help. "Ella, don't worry, we'll get out of this," Gabrielle said as she watched her friend cry. The blonde's back muscles were screaming at the effort of holding the wagon against the strength of the water. At the same time, the rest of Gabrielle's body was going numb from the ice-cold water. The wagon slipped a bit and the weight of the vehicle pushed Gabrielle into the water before she could regain her footing in the soft mud. "Gabrielle," Ella called out. "I'm okay…it's okay." Gabrielle looked across at her friend, watching as Ella raised the knife she still held in her hands. With shaking fingers, the slender woman began slicing through the leather straps wrapped around her. "Ella, what are you doing?!" Gabrielle cried out. "Gabrielle, I have to." "No, please don't give up…we can do this. Xena and I were in plenty of spots worse than this--" "Gabrielle, this isn't going to get better, you and I both know that," Ella shouted back, continuing to cut through the rope wrapped around her leg. "If I cut myself free, I can let go of the wagon." "You can't swim in this, Ella. The current's too strong!" "I have to try, Gabrielle…please understand, one of us has to live." "We will both live…I can do this!" "Gabrielle, this isn't something you can fight your way out of. Promise me…"
"What?" Gabrielle asked in confusion. "My girls…promise me, Gabrielle. Promise me you'll take care of my girls," Ella pleaded. "Don't do this, Ella, please, don't do this…" "Promise me! With you…no one else. All I want is for my children to be raised by someone who loves them." Ella pushed the cut leather straps from her body. "Please, Gabrielle." "I promise…" Gabrielle said, her voice barely heard over the rushing water. Ella wasted no time. She knew if she didn't do it right away, she'd lose her nerve. The dark-haired woman looked to the other side of the bank where her daughter stood. She knew she was doing the right thing. Something inside her understood all along that the young Amazon Queen would play a large part in her daughter's lives. "Thank you, my friend," Ella said, releasing her grip on the side of the wagon. "Noooo!" Gabrielle screamed, reaching out as far as her body would allow, trying to capture the slender woman. Ella disappeared immediately beneath the swirling water, Gabrielle's screams of pain and frustration lost in the sound of roaring whitewater. It was only a matter of heartbeats, but to Gabrielle it felt like an eternity. She struggled to free her trapped foot from the spokes of the wheel, but the wagon held fast in the soft mud. She watched as Tai ran back and forth, crying and calling out her mother's name. Suddenly the child ran off, Gabrielle shouting the youngster's name. A horse's neigh caught her attention and she craned her neck to see Lightning on the other side of the river. The white stallion reared back on its hind legs, attempting to enter the fast moving water.
"No!" Gabrielle shouted, somehow sure that her mount understood her. "No, Stay back!" The animal continued to paw at the ground, shaking his massive head back and forth. She searched the shore for signs of Tai, but the young girl was nowhere along the river's edge. The water continued to rise as the Queen realized that her friend's death would be for nothing unless Gabrielle could find a way to free herself.
CHAPTER 17
THEY'D BEEN TRAVELING nearly non-stop since they talked with the man at the stables in Pella. The story he told about the small blonde and the way she broke the wild stallion made Xena grin from ear to ear. Eponin wasn't sure if it was pride, she saw in her friend's face, or sheer happiness at the notion that Gabrielle had been seen, alive and well. Xena felt driven, but she had a goal now. She felt Argo's muscles moving underneath her, the sound of the other horses hooves pounding in her ears. She'd been doing nothing but thinking about Gabrielle, not just her wife, but also their life together. Xena had always been the one in control, even after she met Gabrielle. Her bard trusted Xena to take care of them in every way. Now, their lives were changing, had changed. They lived in a place where Gabrielle took care of them. Xena wondered if she ever really thought about that until now. Her need for control was great and now she truly had to relinquish that need. Now, she had to do more than say, she could do this; she had to prove it. "Son of a Bacchae!" Xena broke out of her introspection, just in time to avoid trampling a child who came running into the middle of the road.
The warrior brought up Argo hard, the mare skidding to a halt in front of the terrified youngster. The child cried hysterically and pointed toward the river. Xena and the Amazons heard the water break free, knowing a flash flood could be a devastating thing, should anyone be caught in the riverbed. The child had short blonde hair and her eyes were the color of Gabrielle's. The youngster's cry brought Xena up short. "Come now…please, help Bri!" Xena lifted the child up by her shoulders and looked into the tear-stained face. The warrior knew. There could only be one person in the known world that sent that particular chill up her spine. One woman whose heart called out to Xena in such a way that the warrior just knew she was near. Xena held the child to her and jumped into Argo's saddle, spurring the animal toward the river. The warrior's actions were swift and smooth. She came to the edge of the river, close to the spot of the large bridge that looked as though it had recently been destroyed. Reining in Argo, Xena slid from the saddle and deposited the child safely on the ground. Xena took it all in at a single glance. As she rode to a halt before the river's edge, the warrior saw the wagon in the middle of the river, white water rushing all around the precariously tilting vehicle. A blonde head struggled to stay above the water's surface. The warrior didn't have to think; her response to the situation was as natural as breathing. "Gabrielle!" Xena screamed. Xena ran for the river's edge, making it in half a dozen strides. When her feet hit the edge, she launched her body into the air, hitting the water below. The warrior sliced through the surface of the churning water fighting the rushing torrent to reach the wagon. "Gabrielle," Xena called out breathlessly, pulling even with the wagon and
grabbing the leaning cart. "Xena?" Gabrielle looked around in confusion. The cold water was affecting her; it had to be. The small blonde could have swore she heard-"Xena?" Gabrielle came face to face with brilliant sapphire orbs. It was quick, an instant and no more. Gabrielle realized that no matter how far she ran or for how long they were apart, looking into those loving eyes would always be like coming home. "Oh Gods, Xena!" Gabrielle's tears began again. "Gabrielle," Xena cradled her wife's head in one hand, kissing the lips that she had begun to fear would never be within her reach again. "Baby, we have to get you out of here. Hold on to me." "Xena, I can't. My foot…it's caught. I can't get loose." "Hang on, baby, let me take a look." Xena took a deep breath and dove under the water. The water was thick with dirt and sand, preventing Xena from even opening her eyes. She felt Gabrielle's foot, wedged between the spokes of the wagon wheel. The Queen's foot was buried up to mid calf in the mud at the bottom of the river. Xena tried digging away the silt, but as soon as she scooped a handful away, the water settled more over that spot. The need for air brought her to the surface again. Already Eponin had three Amazons in the water, ropes tethering them together and anchored at the river's edge. They quickly made their way to the wagon, attempting to use their combined strength to return the wagon to an upright position. Just when they thought they could fight the water and upend the wagon, Gabrielle screamed. "My leg…" she cried out to Xena.
Another dive into the icy waters and Xena saw her wife's predicament. Gabrielle's leg had been buried when the wagon was on an angle. Her foot was so firmly entrenched in the mud of the river bottom that each time the Amazons tilted the wagon to its normal upright position, it bent the young Queen's leg to almost a breaking point. Perhaps a quarter of a candlemark passed. Xena noted that the water, which had been up to Gabrielle's neck, now came to just below her chin. Xena stared at the water line, her wife's shivering voice breaking her from her reverie. "I'm not going to make it, am I?" she couldn't keep the tears from taking over once more. "Don't say that! Don't you dare say that. I'll think of a way, Brie…don't I always?" Xena brushed away the tears and cupped Gabrielle's face in her hand, holding the tear-streaked face upward to keep her from swallowing any more water. Xena wrapped her arm around the smaller woman in an attempt to keep her from freezing; the Queen's lips already a dusky hue. "Gabrielle…baby, use your ring, the one Apollo gave you. Call him for help." Gabrielle shook her head, even though Xena held it firmly in her grasp. "It won't work…it's a long story," she answered Xena's furrowed brow. "It might…at least try," Xena pleaded. "You'll have to use yours," Gabrielle sputtered as a rush of water tossed a wave in her direction. "Mine fell off when I tried to pull my leg free." "Oh Gods, Brie," Xena exclaimed. The warrior looked into Gabrielle's eyes, the warrior's own filling with tears. "Brie…I left it at home when I went hunting. I…I didn't want to lose it." Gabrielle chuckled under the disastrous circumstances. "It's all right, love. Maybe it was meant to be this way." The blonde hadn't meant to sound
defeatist, but the water was so cold and she was getting very tired. Her brain wanted to fight, but her body just kept telling her to give up. "No! Damn you Gabrielle, we lost our daughter, I will not lose you…not again!" "Xena…Xe," Gabrielle said in a softer tone. "It's okay, really it is. I'm just so happy I got to look into your eyes one last time, kiss you, and tell you how very much I love you. I'm sorry, Xe…I never meant to hurt you…" "I don't want to listen to you talk this way, Gabrielle," Xena's voice broke. "I won't let you give up." "You might have to, Xe." "No! I won't let you go, Gabrielle." Tears streamed down Xena's face, washed away by the waves that swirled and splashed into their faces. "I won't be without you…I'll follow you. I won't live this life without you. I can't, Brie…I just can't…not without you, my heart." "No! Xena, I made a promise and it's up to you to keep it for me." The river was past the small woman's chin and she spat out the water as she spoke. Xena tilted her wife's head up further, but soon the warrior knew; it would be too high for Gabrielle to breathe. "Xe…" Gabrielle watched as the blue eyes before her darted around. Gabrielle could sense her warrior trying to devise a plan in her head. "Xena, look at me!" Gabrielle called out sharply. Xena focused all her attention on the small woman in her arms. "Brie… when the water gets too high, let me give you a breath of air. We can do that to buy some more time," Xena finished, watching the Amazons around her repeatedly diving beneath the surface to dig the mud away. "Xe, I need to say this," Gabrielle struggled to keep her mouth above the water line. "The girl…on the shore. Her name is Tai…she has a baby sister
in the bushes." "It's okay, Gabrielle," Eponin said breathlessly. The Amazon had just resurfaced and was breathing heavily. "We found the baby…she and the little girl…they're okay…Maris is with them." "Thanks, Ep…for everything," Gabrielle said quickly. "Ella…" a new flood of tears began and Gabrielle coughed as she swallowed more of the river water. "Xe, their mother has been such a good friend to me. We were both trapped here and she gave her life so I could live to raise her children. I promised her, and now I need you to promise me," Gabrielle looked up expectantly. "No, don't ask me to promise you that," Xena returned. "I am asking, Xe. I'm begging you. Take care of these children. I promised Ella that I would raise them and no one else. Don't you see, love? You are me. We are one, in life as well as death. I know in my heart that if I leave these children with you, it will be the same as raising them myself. You will be a wonderful mother, Xe." The water had risen too far and Gabrielle could only look on as her wife cried tears of pain and frustration. "I…I don't want to do any of it without you, Brie," Xena said in a soft, childlike voice. Gabrielle could only look on, watching as Xena turned a head toward the riverbank and gazed at the small blonde-haired child that cried in an Amazon's arms. The warrior turned back to Gabrielle, blue eyes so intense, and simply nodded. "On one condition…you have to hold on a little longer for me, Brie." Gabrielle started to shake her head back and forth, but Xena shook her by her shoulders. "Yes! You at least have to try…for me. Now, I'm going to breath for you."
It took only heartbeats to explain the procedure to the Queen and soon Xena and Gabrielle were trading off breaths. In between breaths, Xena took a large gulp of air and dove beneath the water's surface. Their actions and the water's movement disturbed the riverbed so much that she couldn't see a thing. The silt hung heavy in the water, obscuring her sight. She felt along the river bottom, sifting the top layer through her fingers. The warrior concentrated along the area closest to Gabrielle's foot. Xena didn't have time to find out why Gabrielle thought her ring wouldn't work in summoning the small blonde's father. She searched for the band, hanging on its promise as her last hope. When Gabrielle was ready for a breath, she would tug on the warrior's shoulder and the whole process would repeat itself.
Please, Apollo, Artemis, Athena…Gods, please…Ares, I'd get down on my knees to you, just please don't let me lose her…not my heart… Xena prayed as she repeatedly dove into the freezing water. She didn't care to whom she owed what. The warrior would gladly pay any price to keep this light alive.
Please just let her live…just let her live… * * *
"Oh, my…that was some trip," Bedilia took a deep breath and let go of Hades' arm. "It's about time you showed up …" Ares took one look at the ancient looking woman on his uncle's arm and weakly finished the sentence. "… with reinforcements? Who is she?" Ares raised his voice in pitch as well as strength. "I just knew it! The one and only time I try to do something good and you guys are gonna get me killed for it."
"Ares!" Apollo called out to his brother. "Take it easy…we know her." Bedilia stood before the illusionary prison, feeling the raw power the simulated bars gave off. They shimmered and sparkled, but appeared to hold strong. "Hello, Bedilia," Apollo offered a weak smile to the old woman. "Hello yourself," she smiled back at the handsome God, ignoring Ares leaning over her shoulder. "In a bit of a jam, I believe your daughter would say." "You saw her?" Apollo's expression turned to one of pain as he thought about his daughter and the unbearable sorrow she was going through alone. "Oh, my yes…that girl," Bedilia chuckled. "She is her father's daughter, Apollo. Why do you know--" "I do hate to interrupt, but we're kind of on a time table here," Ares broke in. "You always were the most impatient one of the lot, Ares," Bedilia remarked without taking her eyes off the bars in front of her. "Even as a child." Ares blanched at the sound of that, clearing his throat, and then blushing slightly. Apollo smiled in relief at the old woman's words. "Where is she? Does she know what's going on? Hera's spell…did you remove it?" "Calm down my friend," the old woman answered. "Gabrielle is on her way back to the Amazon Village. She is aware of some, but not all of what has been happening. She does know I was on my way to see you. I
thought my sisters told me that Hera forced you to watch through her scrying bowl?" "It seems it only worked when Hera wanted me to see something," Apollo indicated the hammered brass bowl with a nod of his head. "It's bad enough I can't free myself or Morpheus, but my powers have all but disappeared in here." "We tried, but our powers don't seem to work from out here either," Ares and Hades both acknowledged. Ares spoke slowly and loudly, considering the old woman's age. "Is he simple?" Bedilia whispered to Hades. The dark-haired God laughed loudly and laughed even more and the indignant look on his nephew's face. I'll bet he never thought being on the good team would humiliate him so much, Hades thought to himself. "Well, first things first," Bedilia responded. With a wave of her hand, the restraints suddenly dropped from the wrists of both confined Gods. "Whoa," Ares tilted his head to one side. "How did she do that?" "Then," Bedilia passed her hand before the opening of the cavern again. A steamy mist rose from the scrying bowl, a hissing sound emitted from the metal. The liquid swirled about as Apollo strained to see past the bubbling brew. "Whoa, how'd she…hey, how'd you do that?" Ares asked in awe. "Nooo!" Apollo cried out, peering into the scrying bowl, the window to the mortal realm. "Gabrielle! Bedilia quick, get me out of here!" "Removing this spell so Hera isn't aware it's been broken requires something other than speed," the old woman answered.
Bedilia opened her mind to the vision the God was staring at in the bowl. She could see Gabrielle, under water, but her Consort wouldn't concede the battle for the young Queen's life. "Hera has found out that Gabrielle is free of the mind control. She can see where the young woman is. We can still have a modicum of surprise on our side, but we'll have to act quickly." Bedilia spoke in rapid tones. A small inflection in her speech appeared when she spoke quickly like that. Her vowels rolled off the tongue, giving away the fact that she'd grown up speaking a dialect more ancient than even the Olympians themselves. "One of you must go to Gabrielle. Even now, the Warrior Princess is about to call you to her Apollo. If you used the spell on that ring that I think you did, it will draw you to Gabrielle before you have a chance to object. Your essence will shatter into a thousand pieces as soon as it passes through these prison bars." All eyes turned to Ares. "Oh, nooo! No, no, no! She'll fry me…Hera will cut me up into tiny pieces and serve me with a cream sauce on the side!" Ares paced behind the old woman. Bedilia cried out as the bars sparked, small flames of molten lava falling to the cavern floor. "Go now!" "No! No! N--aw, shit!" The God disappeared in a blue flash. "Please, Bedilia…I know you need time, but…it's not that I don't trust Ares, but he--" "Apollo!" Bedilia uttered sharply, her eyes closed in concentration. "It took me a millennium to develop the spell to keep Gods out of this room. I would think that you could afford me a dozen heartbeats to see to it that
we can get back in." The sandy-haired God lowered his head, but the old woman saw his hands wringing together out of fear and frustration. "Don't worry so much, Apollo…how like your daughter you are…how much you two manage to feel. She opened one eyelid and peered at him. "Besides, your brother will be a more than adequate surrogate. I suspect that after this, he may be unable to keep the true nature of his relationship a secret much longer." The old woman's words took Apollo's mind off the impossible task of waiting patiently when his daughter so desperately needed his help. "Gabrielle will be furious at me for not telling her," he said. Bedilia chuckled. "If you think your daughter will be angry…just wait till the Warrior Princess finds out. Then we will truly learn the meaning of mortal displeasure." Bedilia continued to smile with her eyes closed. The majority of her concentration focused on the ancient words, blending the threads together and mixing the incantation like a true witches brew. A small part of her mind, however, found these mortals, even the Gods who constantly dabbled in the humans' lives, wildly amusing. The happiness and the tragedy, it all completed the circle. She grinned from ear to ear, splitting her concentration among the tasks at hand. "What are you smiling at, old woman?" Apollo asked suspiciously. Bedilia chuckled again under her breath. "Things that keep me young." * * *
Xena broke the surface of the water, even as she was slipping the ring on her finger. "Fa--" A hand clamped across her mouth and strong fingers plucked the golden ring from her fingers. Xena felt herself pushed aside, losing her hold on Gabrielle. The warrior looked on in horror as Ares stood in the freezing water, eying the ring and pushing it into his shirt pocket. "Aresss!" Xena screamed, throwing an uppercut into the God of War's chin. Ares' head rocked back under the force of the blow, the God acknowledging the fact that there weren't many mortals with the power to do that to him. "Xena! Get a grip, woman!" Then Ares did something Xena never thought she would ever see. The God raised a hand and instantly the rushing water stopped and with another wave of his hand, the surging river pushed itself up river. Gabrielle took one long gasp as she brought much needed air into her lungs. The young Queen fell over into Xena's arms, the small blonde's body trembling with cold and fatigue. Ares grabbed the wagon with both hands, gently lifting the wooden cart up from the mud, the suction carrying Gabrielle's trapped foot to the surface also. Xena reached down and extracted the bard's foot from the spokes of the wagon wheel, while a band of stunned Amazons looked on with their mouths hanging open. They all knew about Xena's past with Ares and the times the God of War put their Queen's life in jeopardy, simply to further his own quest to regain the Warrior Princess as his own. Even Xena seemed a little bewildered at Ares' actions. "Well, are you all gonna stand there and stare at me all day or get her out of the river?" Ares shouted impatiently. "Geez, you'd think I never do
anything good," he muttered under his breath. The Amazons scrambled to the shore, but Xena had eyes only for the woman she now held closely to her body, cradling Gabrielle's shivering form in her strong embrace. Eponin helped Xena us the steep embankment with the Queen. Gabrielle was nearly blue, unable to control her trembling body. "Get a fire started…now!" Eponin shouted as the warriors around her rushed to gather wood. Xena grabbed two nearby blankets and wrapped them around her wife's body, rubbing her skin to circulate some warmth into the slight frame. "S-S-So c-cold…" Gabrielle's thoughts trailed off as she closed her eyes tightly, trying to fend off the sleep that threatened. Ares walked up to the camp just as the Amazons tossed the gathered wood into a pile. "Xe…I-I'm really c-c-cold," Gabrielle's teeth chattered together loudly. "I know, baby, we're--" Suddenly the pile of logs and dried wood burst into flames, nearly knocking Eponin backwards. She glared at the God of War, but Ares gave up his best innocent look. "Hey, it wasn't me," he pointed out, raising both eyebrows in the Queen's direction. All eyes turned toward Gabrielle. "Brie?" Xena questioned, only half believing. The warrior knew her wife was half Goddess, but she never saw Gabrielle demonstrate any abilities like this. "I-I'm sorry, Xe…I d-didn't mean it, but Gods, I w-w-was so cold," Gabrielle
answered. Xena laughed aloud and pulled her wife closer. "Don't worry, baby. Hey, look at it this way, camping out is going to be way easy now," the warrior grinned. Gabrielle flashed a weak smile at Xena, holding onto the warrior as though someone threatened to tear the two apart. The small blonde thought of Ella and her promise to her friend. The Queen put her feelings in a safe place until she could deal with them later, knowing she would have to make time to reflect and mourn later. Ares watched the pair, especially the small blonde in whom everyone seemed to hold so high a regard. Grudgingly, the God had to admit, that the kid grew on him. When his brother came to him, right before Gabrielle was born, and asked him for a favor, Ares never knew it would be this one. Once he found out that Gabrielle was fated to capture the Warrior Princess from him, acquiring not only the warrior's heart, but also her very soul, Ares was livid. He accused Apollo of trickery and refused to carry out the sacred tradition. The God of War tried a number of ways to rid himself of Gabrielle's presence, but he could never really hurt her. He got pretty close on a few occasions, but his bond to the girl was a sacred one and like a hundred before him, man and woman, both mortal and God, he found himself a willing prisoner to her compassionate ways, easy charm, and unassuming grace. Ares casually raised a hand and with a warm rush of air, the party found themselves in dry clothing. Gabrielle looked down to find that she was not only warm, but her hair was dry as well. "Ares!" Gabrielle said sharply to the God. Ares was trying to blend into the background without actually leaving, but Gabrielle's voice brought him back to center stage. He fixed a bored look onto his face and stood in front of the seated woman. Gabrielle reached out her hand and took Ares hand within her own. "Thank
you, Ares…for everything," she said in a soft voice. Xena couldn't hide her smile any longer when she noticed what her wife was wearing. Ares caught one look at the smiling blue eyes and had to smile himself.
Hey, she may be family, but the girl is still damn hot! "What are you grinning at?" Gabrielle asked suspiciously. "Um…" Xena motioned with her hand toward Gabrielle. The Queen looked down at her own body and blushed. So, he does have a sense of humor…and I thought he was all libido. The small blonde was dressed in the green top and skirt she wore for seasons as she and Xena traveled across the countryside. Gabrielle found out, many seasons later, Xena always had a thing for the top, even though the warrior took every opportunity available to comment about its hideous appearance. Now, the top and skirt were about half the size they should have been and Gabrielle looked suspiciously like the women who danced in those taverns she passed when she and Xena last visited Athens. Gabrielle couldn't help her own ironic smile. "You're pathetic," she chuckled as she dropped Ares' hand. "You'll never change." With another wave of his hand, he returned Gabrielle to a more modest version of her old outfit. "Hey, can't blame a God for trying," Ares quipped. "I can," Xena responded flatly, arching an eyebrow at her former mentor. The warrior's voice softened, as did her expression as she pulled Gabrielle to her once more. "Thank you, Ares. Hey," she looked down at Gabrielle, "what do you mean, thanking him for everything?" Xena teased. Gabrielle looked up at Ares, remembering when the God refused to let Gabrielle harm herself. To the young Queen, it seemed as if it were a season ago, not just a week. She looked back at her wife and pressed herself into the warrior's warm body.
"I guess we have a lot of talking to do, huh? Xe, I--" "Bri! Bri!" The youngster's body followed Tai's voice as the small child sped toward the Queen, leaping into the familiar embrace. "I'm sorry, My Queen," Maris walked up behind Tai. "She fell asleep, but when she woke up and didn't see you…" Maris' voice trailed off. Gabrielle shook off the apology from the Amazon and noted Emery, sound asleep as usual in Maris' arms. "I found some baka fruit for her," Maris explained to the Queen. The sweet, milky juice of the baka made an excellent short-term substitute for mother's milk. "I found enough to hold her till we can get to the Village." "I think this must be one of those things we have to talk about, eh?" Xena indicated the children, watching the blonde-haired child in her wife's lap, even as the girl eyed the warrior with a slight air of distrust. "Yes," Gabrielle answered. "Tai, honey…this is Xena, my wife. Remember, I told you about her?" Tai had her arms tightly wound around Gabrielle's neck as she turned her head to look over at the dark-haired woman. Xena gave her a little half smile. The youngster openly stared at the strong woman, spying the hilt of the sword strapped to Xena's back. "Ooh…a warrior," Tai said reverently. Xena grinned. "Yeah." "Me too," Tai responded, pointing out the wooden sword strapped to her waist." "I would have been able to tell right off," Xena answered in a gentle voice. "I bet you were a big help to Brie." Xena had no idea how the child came to call Gabrielle by the warrior's own pet name for her wife, but Xena's heart
went out to the child for whom Gabrielle had somehow become protector. "I didn't help too much," Tai answered shyly. Turning back to Gabrielle, matching green eyes stared at one another. "Mama's gone." Tai said in her childlike voice. "Uh, huh," Gabrielle nodded, her own eyes filling with tears. "I'm so sorry, Tai, but yes, she's gone." The girl tightened her hold on the Queen, burying her face against Gabrielle's neck. "Will you go too?" she asked tearfully. Gabrielle wanted to crush the girl in her strong arms, offering up a promise right then and there. She thought of her wife and knew she wasn't alone anymore. What if Xena didn't want a ready-made family…someone else's children? What would Gabrielle do then? The small blonde raised her eyes and met the powerful emotions directed at her from the blue gaze next to her. Xena's own eyes sparkled with unshed tears and the warrior, like she did so many times in the past, offered Gabrielle an answer without words. The expression was a familiar one to the Amazons who couldn't help but watch the interaction between their Queen and her Consort. They saw the look bestowed upon the small blonde many times and for many reasons. The warrior's expression said that she would do anything for Gabrielle. No request would be too small, no danger too great…in life or death, near or far. Anything…anything at all is what Xena would give to keep this light in her life. Xena raised a hand, first to gently touch the backs of her fingers to Gabrielle's cheek, then to place the same hand on Tai's small head. "Bri isn't going anywhere, Tai," Xena said to the youngster who turned her tear-stained face to the warrior. "She won't go…not without us," Xena smiled at the girl, and then reached over to place a gentle kiss against her wife's forehead. "Okay, I think I'm going to be ill now," Ares said with a heavy sound of
sarcasm. "Is the love fest over yet?" "Tai," Xena said drawing the girl to sit in her own lap. "That's what happens to bad warriors," Xena pointed to the God of War. "Ooh," Tai used her favorite expression, settling comfortably in the warrior's embrace. "So, that's the thanks I get. I turn up and play hero and all I get is to be the butt of Warrior Princess jokes. After everything I did today…do you know how long it takes leather to dry?" he indicated his pants. "Awww," Xena drawled for Ares' benefit. Tai's head went back and forth from the warrior holding her, to the giant man standing in front of them. She watched as the two traded insults back and forth. "Excuse me!" Gabrielle spoke up. She leaned closer to Tai. "They really do like each other," she said to the youngster. Then, looking up at Xena and Ares, "see how they can shake hands and be friends…even when they disagree about things?" Xena opened her mouth to refute that idea completely, but watched as Gabrielle gave her the look. The warrior sighed in resignation and handed Tai back to Gabrielle, rising to her feet, a slight look of disgust on her face. Ares looked down at Gabrielle just as the Queen silently mouthed the word, please. Suddenly the God's expression matched the one on Xena's face. He reluctantly extended his hand, refusing to look at the warrior. Xena turned back to Gabrielle once more and saw a raised eyebrow. Then she looked at the earnest expression on Tai's face and realized immediately, she would be making a great many concessions in her life from here on in. The God of War and the Warrior Princess clasped hands in a, none to gentle, handshake. Their eyes turned feral, but the pleasant smiles remained fixed upon their faces. Each of them stood their ground, while
trying to assert their strength in the form of an iron grip, neither one of them willing to concede and pull away. "Whipped," Ares muttered under his breath. "Asshole," Xena hissed through her teeth. Gabrielle jumped up and with a smile on her own face, pushed the two physically apart. "See?" she said to Tai, throwing a look of caution at both Ares and Xena. "Bri…I'm hungry," Tai piped up. Gabrielle looked over at the youngster and smiled at the girl. Tai had already gone through so much in her young life, but she appeared to have an unusual ability to accept life as it came. The Queen only hoped that what lay ahead for all of them would be easier to bear than what they'd experienced recently.
CHAPTER 18
SUDDENLY THEY HEARD shouting, a few well-chosen curses were tossed about, and the loud neigh, almost bray, of a horse. Rushing past the line of trees, closer to the river's edge, the party came upon two of their number trying desperately to control one very out of control horse. The white stallion reared back on its hind legs, threatening to lash out at the Amazons who ran closer in an attempt to grab the animal's reins. "Lightning! Stop!" Gabrielle shouted,
Instantly, like water dousing a flame, the beast dropped to all four legs and calmed. He moved slowly in Gabrielle's direction, lowering his massive head when he reached the small blonde. The Queen threw her arms around the animal's neck. "I'm so glad you're okay. You have to behave, these are my friends," the Amazons smiled as their Queen spoke to the horse as if he understood. They were most impressed, since most of them knew that Gabrielle's least favorite place in the known world was on top of a horse's back. "That is the biggest fucking horse I've ever seen!" Eponin exclaimed. "Ep!" Xena said sharply. "Little pitchers," the warrior hinted. "Oh," the Amazon responded. "Sorry, big guy," Eponin apologized to the horse. Xena simply looked at Gabrielle, the Queen using a strategically placed hand to cover her smile. Xena rolled her eyes, shaking her head back and forth, as she turned to the Amazon once more. "Some days I'm amazed that you've lived this long." "What?" Eponin asked innocently. "I wasn't talking about the horse lame brain." Xena nodded her head to indicate the child standing between them. "Ohhh," the Amazon grinned in embarrassment. "I tend to agree with her though, Brie…where on earth did he come from?" Xena asked. Gabrielle related the story of how she came to purchase Lightning. The small group exchanged some skeptical looks once the Queen finished the tale.
"Gabrielle," Xena began. "Please, don't tell me you actually tried out the fairy tale that one-eyed centaur told you." "He wasn't missing an eye, he was missing a leg. Besides, it worked." Gabrielle replied. "Right," Xena grinned at her wife. He still looks a little rank to me, hon." "He's gentle as a lamb." "Uh huh. Mind if I give him a spin?" "Well, um…no, but you probably should--" Xena sprang into the saddle before Gabrielle could finish her sentence. Lightning watched as his mistress spoke to another human, but suddenly the other human was sitting on his back, his mistress' customary spot. The stallion had learned not to balk at the feel of a rider, but this human was much heavier in the saddle than his mistress was. The animal's natural instincts kicked in and he reacted in much the same manner as the first time Gabrielle mounted him. Gabrielle made a move to scoop up Tai before Lightning could trample them all, but it didn't take that long. The stallion bucked and kicked twice. On the second spin in the air, the Warrior Princess went sailing over the group's heads. Xena came down with a crash into the dirt. "Xe!" Gabrielle called out. She and Tai rushed over to the fallen warrior. "What was it you were trying to say?" Xena asked Gabrielle. "I was going to say that you probably should let me introduce the two of you first," Gabrielle replied. "You could have tried a little harder to tell me," Xena grimaced, rising to a sitting position. "What…and spoil all the fun?"
"That was payback for all the seasons I let Argo make fun of you, wasn't it?" Tai started laughing and pointed to Xena. "You funny!" Xena looked up, rising to her feet with a groan. "Thanks, kid," she responded, rubbing her backside. "I did that just for you, ya know." "Do it again, Xena!" Tai pleaded, slipping her hand inside the warrior's. Xena looked panicked and Gabrielle merely looked amused. "Maybe later," Xena muttered. "All right, the show is over. Gabrielle said to everyone gathered around. "We're losing the light, so we'd better camp here for the night. We can start for home at first light. Um, we're a little short of camping supplies…Ares?" "Oh yeah…suck up to the God when you need something." Gabrielle realized that for some reason she had a small little bit of power over the God who usually was trying to kill her, merely tolerating her at best. She mustered up a rather beguiling look and tossed it in Ares' direction. "Okay," Ares replied immediately, "guess I'm getting soft." The God snapped his fingers and three large tents circled the fire. Gabrielle knew that when she looked inside, not an amenity would be missing. The Queen proceeded to tell the warriors around her what she wanted and soon the camp was teeming with activity. Xena paused to watch her wife as she gave commands and answered questions. I guess this is the beginning, she thought to herself. In the past, even though Gabrielle was Queen, she deferred to Xena's judgment when outside the Village or in battle. In the warrior's eyes, this whole experience changed Gabrielle. It wasn't a bad thing; actually, it was a very good thing. It was, however, one step closer to anonymity for Xena. She felt it inside,
the fact that she was quickly becoming, not Xena, the Warrior Princess, but merely Queen Gabrielle's Consort, Xena. She knew in her heart that Gabrielle would never relegate Xena to either a subservient position or a spot within the Queen's shadow. The warrior remembered the words Gabrielle once spoke to her…
"A long time ago, I accepted the consequences of our life together…that it might one day come to this. It has. I'm not afraid." Xena smiled to herself. Her wife had meant those words to mean something entirely different from the situation Xena now faced, but to the warrior, the sentiment was the same. Xena fell in love with, and married, an Amazon Queen. She knew that someday Gabrielle would assume her throne on a full time basis. Now, it was the warrior's turn to accept. It was time for Xena to accept the consequences of a life with Gabrielle, completely aware of all that life might bring. The warrior's smile reached her face as she silently undertook her destiny. Gabrielle turned her head and locked eyes with Xena from across the camp. The warrior's smile said more than her words ever could. Xena knew in her heart that she could finally be content in this role. She would never play the helpless female to anyone, but for Gabrielle, she would gladly step to the rear. This need she possessed for so long, to control, situations as well as people, she felt it loosening its hold on her. Life was too short and most of the time, it came at such a cost. Xena wasn't about to spend one more heartbeat in this mortal realm either away or at odds with her soulmate, not if she had anything to say about it. She watched as Gabrielle crossed the camp to stand before her. "I'll take Ep with me and we'll hunt up some dinner. I don't want to owe him too much," Xena whispered into Gabrielle's ear. "Will you be okay… especially with him here?" The warrior placed her arms around the small blonde, oblivious to those watching. Her action surprised some of the onlookers, Xena never having been known for public displays of affection in front of the Amazons.
Gabrielle nodded and reached up to kiss her wife. "It feels good to be able to do that again," the Queen smiled. "Feels pretty nice on this end, too," the warrior grinned. Xena felt a tug on her battle skirt and looked down. "Can I go wit you? Tai asked. Xena couldn't stop herself, and that surprised her more than anyone else. "Hunting, eh? Sure you can." She scooped the child into her arms and noticed Gabrielle's worried frown. "We're just going after a few rabbits, not to worry." "All right. Take care of her, though, Xe." Xena chuckled as she walked away with Tai in her arms, rolling her eyes slightly. * * *
Gabrielle sat alone, enjoying the sounds of the camp a short distance away. She had fed and held Emery, seeing to it the child fell comfortably asleep, and then entrusted the sleeping infant to Maris' arms once again. She smiled at the memory of the child in her embrace. She never expected it to feel that way, the act of holding a baby. The young Queen shook her head to dispel the thoughts she knew might eventually turn maudlin. Suddenly she felt a sensation against her skin that reminded her of the way the flesh on her arms would rise up with goose bumps at a cold breeze. She grinned. So, that's how Xena always knows. "Hello, Ares," Gabrielle said aloud.
"You're getting good at that." He said, sitting down next to the young woman. "Just thought I'd pop back and let you know about your dad." "Is he safe, what's going on…did you see him," Gabrielle quickly rattled off her questions. "Whoa, take a deep breath. Yea, I saw him. He's not doing too badly considering what he's been through lately. We're working on getting him free right now. I guess you know by now that Hera was the one who caused all of this." Gabrielle nodded. "Bedilia told me." "Yea, the old broad." Gabrielle chuckled and shook her head back and forth. "Ares, you can be so shallow." All of a sudden, Gabrielle tilted her head as if listening to something. She knew the feeling well, but decided to let it be, for the moment. "Did…did my father ask about me?" Gabrielle asked hesitantly. "Gabrielle," Ares voice took on a genuine tone. "You're just about the only thing he's been thinking about. Apollo was the one who sent me to you… you know, that night," he referred to Gabrielle's failed suicide attempt. "Thanks again," she responded. "I know you say father sent you, but knowing how you feel about me, Ares…well, you didn't have to do what you did." "Yeah, I did," he answered softly. Ares looked over at Gabrielle's questioning face and rubbed a hand over his face, nervously playing with his mustache. He didn't have to tell the girl the truth, but he knew he would anyway. "You know I remember the day that your mom told Apollo she was pregnant
with you. He came to me, so excited I thought he just challenged Zeus and won. I didn't see what all the fuss was, over a kid I mean, but Apollo just laughed at me and told me I'd get it someday. He asked me a favor, one that I said yes to before I knew the full extent of what I was signing on for." "Father tricked you into something?" Gabrielle interrupted. "He says no, but I guess the jury's still out on that one," Ares smirked. "So, what was the big favor? He didn't talk you into being my guardian angel, did he? Because I gotta tell you, if that's the case, you're not doing it right," Gabrielle laughed at her own joke. She looked up, concerned at the God's continued silence. Ares looked up and Gabrielle saw something she'd never before seen in his face. It was guilt. "Oh no…no, I don't believe it!" "What can I say? He came to me and asked me. Gabrielle, do you know what an honor it is for a God to ask another God to be Guardian to his child?" "Don't! Don't say one more word!" Gabrielle placed her hands over her face, pulling them away to stare at the dark-haired God. "What…Gods, I don't even believe I'm asking this. What does a Guardian do?" "Well, I guess I can't blame you too much for your thoroughly underwhelming response to the news. Guardian to a God's child is like being there for the kid when their old man can't be. When they get older, the Guardian becomes a sort of…" Ares looked at Gabrielle, suddenly unsure he should be telling the girl with such a volatile temper all of this. "A sort of what?" Gabrielle enunciated each word carefully. "A sort of mentor. Somebody who helps the kid out with learning about their powers and stuff."
"You?!" "Yeah, well I guess I wasn't always there for you…" "Ares, you were never there for me!" Gabrielle raised her voice. "Well, I wasn't that bad…" "Weren't that bad? Ares, can you even count the number of times I've been kidnapped because you talked some warlord into thinking it would be a great way to get back at Xena? How about Xena and the Furies, remember that one?" "Well, I--" the God shrugged his shoulders as Gabrielle continued. "Oh, and what about Hope…Callisto…have you forgotten that you all but forced me into knocking Hope into that lava pit?" "Hey, I never thought you'd jump in there with her, what was that all about? Besides Apollo brought you back." "My father? Is that how I…" Gabrielle's words trailed off. Somewhere in the back of her memory, she did remember a kiss on the forehead by a man who cradled her in strong arms. She thought at the time she was dreaming of a father figure she wished for instead of the mortal man she grew up thinking of as her real father. Abruptly, Gabrielle turned and slapped the God across the arm. "I can't believe-you-never-told me!" The small blonde punctuated nearly every word with an additional slap. "Okay, okay! I'm a selfish bastard. You knew that already." The Queen finally quieted herself. "Why, Ares?" she asked. "What was so wrong with me?" The God of War should have known this would be his niece's reaction. If
someone had given him the same news about himself, Ares would have discounted them as having something seriously wrong with them. Gabrielle would always be Gabrielle. She internalized everything, thinking an incident such as this could only mean some serious flaw in her own character. "Nothing, Gabrielle, there was nothing wrong with you," Ares said softly, even surprising himself by believing the words. "It was just…I had plans and--" "That involved Xena," Gabrielle stated simply. Ares didn't have to answer. He nodded his head and leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees. "I guess I always figured Apollo saw that you and Xena were destined to meet and fall in love before I did. I thought he did it as a way to keep you safe from me." Gabrielle's ire eased somewhat as she truly looked at Ares for the first time. She knew what it felt like to be the child that was different from everyone else, even worse, to be the black sheep of the siblings. She remembered never being able to please her father, never being able to do quite enough to become favored. She understood how those feelings could lead to mistrust of a brother. "Maybe he did it because you were his brother and he loved you," Gabriele responded. "What now, Ares?" Gabrielle asked about their future. "I don't know," he answered wearily. "Seems pretty clear, even to me, that Xena has what she wants, even if it's not what I wanted for her. Besides, if you don't learn how to use some of those powers you have, you'll become a rogue." "Rogue?" "Yeah, someone who has enough Godly blood in them to give them a few powers. Mostly just enough to make them dangerous, and at the rate you're going," he pointed a finger in her direction, "you could wake up in the morning and find out that you set the house on fire in your sleep."
"Could that really happen?" Gabrielle asked in alarm. "Sure, but don't worry, we won't let that happen. I know how you feel about Gods and power, yadda-yadda-yadda, but you've got to learn how to use them before you can control them." "Learn to use my powers…great," Gabrielle answered less than enthusiastically. "Hey, there are worse things that could happen to a girl." "Oh yeah? You're not married to Xena." "Right…rub it in," Ares replied dryly. "You'll never give up, not completely, will you?" Gabrielle asked with a smile. "Yeah, well if she ends up getting as old as that broad, Bedilia, I may. Can't go there." "Ares, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Bedilia is a beautiful woman." "Are we talking about the same person? She's about a billion seasons old. Between you and me, she passed her prime a looong time ago." "That's where we're different, Ares. I can't wait to grow old with Xena, seeing her at fifty, and then, sixty, seventy, surrounded by her own grandchildren and great grandchildren. I have a feeling she's going to be very sexy looking with gray hair," Gabrielle grinned at the God's apparent discomfort at that vision. "And they tell me I have some sick fantasies," Ares responded. "So, let me ask you. The fire you started back there, was that the first time you felt that kind of power?" Gabrielle looked up guiltily. "No, not really. I've felt it a few times before, usually when I'm fighting. It's like if I want something badly enough, with no
doubt in my mind that I want it, well, it happens." "I've got a theory about that, I mean, if you want to hear it?" "You've got a theory?" Gabrielle asked. "Hey, I'm full of 'em," Ares responded smugly. "I always knew you were full of something, Ares," Gabrielle teased. "Yeah, actually--" the God paused, his brows knit together. "Ahh…I get it…full of it…yeah! Like I was saying, I've got a theory about what went on today." "Which is?" Ares expression turned serious. "That maybe you started the fire when you didn't know you could, because you really wanted it. If you can manipulate your power that way, Gabrielle, you should have been able to push the wagon right off of you, down there, in the river. That is unless…unless you didn't really want to live." Gabrielle sat perfectly still, not daring to raise her eyes to the dark-haired God. His guess wasn't far off the mark and the young Queen knew it. "I think…sometimes," Gabrielle began, "I don't think I'm worthy…of anything. Maybe a part of me thought it would be better if I wasn't around anymore." "Well it wouldn't," Ares said sharply. "Be better, I mean." "I know it's hard for a God to understand, but some days, I still feel like a farm girl from Potidaea." "That's because you don't believe in yourself," Ares answered. "Gabrielle, why do those women in the camp obey you?" "They have to," she muttered in reply. "I'm the Queen."
"If Xena told them what to do, before she was even your Consort, would they obey her?" "Probably. They know she can be trusted and that she knows what she's doing…" "Wrong! They follow her because they believe in her, and they believe in her because she believes in herself. Gabrielle, you have to believe in yourself before you can expect others to. Hey," he reached out and gently touched Gabrielle's chin. "That's something we'll work on. Okay?" "Okay," the Queen smiled, wiping away an errant tear. An uncomfortable silence descended upon them both. They each turned toward the other with bewildered expressions. "You're actually being nice to me," Gabrielle said first. "I was just thinking the same thing about you. You know you're not such an irritating blonde when you're mouth isn't getting in the way," Ares teased. "Yeah? I was just thinking that you're not quite so self centered when your ego isn't getting in the way," Gabrielle shot back. The two chuckled and Gabrielle rose to go. "Let me tell Xena about all this. All right?" she asked. "I never get to have any fun anymore." "Please?" "Okay, okay, don't beg. It's not very becoming." "One other thing, Ares," Gabrielle paused, placing a hand on the God's shoulder. She lowered her voice so Ares had to strain to hear her. "I know that Xena has been up in the trees the entire time we've been sitting here. I
know she's been listening to us talk. Do me a favor and don't tell her I know about that either. Okay?" Ares shook his head. "You two have some strange ideas about communication. I'll let you know when I find out more about Apollo. Keep your head down. Hera's not going to be happy once she finds out what went down." The God of War rose to stand before the small blonde. "Hey, what's that?" he pointed to Gabrielle's chest. Gabrielle looked down at the spot on her chest that Ares indicated, only to have the God's finger snap up and tweak her nose. Ares laughed at the gullible reaction. "I can't believe you still fall for that," he laughed, and then was gone in a blue flash, his laughter lingering. Gabrielle rolled her eyes, suddenly standing alone in the woods. "He can be such a jerk," she laughed. * * *
Xena leaned her head back against the tree, watching until Gabrielle was gone from sight. The warrior's first instinct had been to rush from her hiding place to confront Ares. His news that he was Gabrielle's Guardian completely stunned Xena. She wanted the God to take it back, to admit that he was lying for some selfish purpose of his own, but she knew that wasn't true. Deep down, she had a feeling that Ares behavior was genuine and the God of War spoke the truth. She watched his interaction with Gabrielle and realized she'd never seen the God that way…acting rather… human. What worried Xena the most was Gabrielle's admission about the events
in the river. The warrior always knew that Gabrielle suffered from a certain lack of self-esteem. Of course, traveling with the great Warrior Princess never helped the young woman's sense of worth. During their time together, Gabrielle spoke to Xena of a number of things during the younger woman's childhood that helped to shape the bard's life. Xena didn't doubt the verity of Gabrielle's love for the warrior, nor her devotion to the bard, but Xena wondered if she'd been showing Gabrielle the support she needed. Was Xena's love holding her wife up, helping her to grow, or was it smothering? Had she spent most of their time together simply telling her wife what was best or had the warrior offered an opinion and then let Gabrielle choose her own way? Had Xena let Gabrielle select her own path, following her own way, or had the dark-haired woman simply allowed Gabrielle to trail along behind, pursuing Xena's path? Xena jumped from the trees and made her way back to their camp. The sun was nearly set and she felt a powerful need to be near her wife. They'd been apart for too long now and the warrior was determined to begin her part, to see that the small blonde truly came to believe in herself. * * *
"Were you able to get her back to sleep?" Xena asked the small blonde. "Finally. I think she's just used to having someone there when she wakes up." Gabrielle settled herself against Xena's chest as they sat before the campfire. The young Queen explained what she knew about Tai's life so far from what Ella had confided in her. Gabrielle told Xena the story as Ella told her that night. "Maybe we should be in there with her." Xena suggested. "She's sound asleep, Xe, I think she'll be okay for a bit. Besides, I think we need to talk…just the two of us."
"Yeah," Xena answered, once again fearful of what those words implied. Would Gabrielle ever leave her for the life of a Demi-Goddess? "What are you thinking?" Gabrielle asked. "What?" Xena looked up quickly to find her wife's head turned, green eyes gazing into deep blue. "What are you thinking; right this minute?" "I…uh…can you read my thoughts?" the warrior asked in concern. "Yes, but not the way you're thinking, silly," Gabrielle chuckled, which calmed the warrior considerably. "I--" Xena began, but Gabrielle interrupted. "The truth, Xe. What are you really wondering?" "With all your new abilities I was wondering when you'll get tired of being with me," Xena answered, unable to meet her wife's eyes. "Want to know the answer?" Xena nodded, certain this was 'the talk' that Gabrielle wanted to have, yet unconvinced that she wanted to hear the answer. "Never." Gabrielle lifted a hand to guide the warrior's face toward her, placing a light kiss upon smooth lips. "Never, Xe, but I'll tell you something. I was sort of wondering the same thing myself. Wondering how long you would be willing to stay with a woman who just happens to be half of the very thing you detest." "You don't ever have to think that way, Gabrielle. I love you…all of you. No matter who your parents are or what kinds of abilities you have, I will always want to be with only you." Xena wrapped strong arms around the smaller woman, pulling her tightly
against her. "Besides, It's not the Gods I detest, it's the way they meddle in my life that I hate. I'm already used to you meddling in my life, so I think we're safe." Gabrielle laughed aloud; not only at the words, but also at the deadpan manner in which they were delivered. Xena smiled, enjoying the sound of her bard's genuine laughter. "That's good to hear, Brie, your laughter." "It feels good, too," Gabrielle responded. "All of this feels good." "Which part, exactly? The part where the Gods are after us again or the part where we actually had to depend on Ares for help?" Xena quipped, kissing the small blonde's ear lightly. Gabrielle giggled this time. "I was thinking about the part where you were holding me in your arms, telling me you loved me and you would never leave me." Xena tightened her hold and placed a gentle kiss on her wife's neck. "I'll always be yours, Brie…always." "Even when I makes promises to strangers to raise their children?" Gabrielle asked hesitantly. Xena took a deep breath before answering. "You must have come to care for Ella quite deeply to do a thing like that." "I did, Xe. She was very special. I felt as if we had known each other for ages." "I see," Xena's arms unconsciously loosened from around Gabrielle and she heard the rather hurt tone in the warrior's voice. "Oh, Xe, no…" Gabrielle turned in the warrior's arms to face her. "It wasn't anything like that." Gabrielle could see it in the warrior's eyes, a hurt expression that told the Queen the warrior thought more than friendship
went on between Gabrielle and Ella. "I thought maybe…I mean, you were alone and under Hera's spell--" "I could never be controlled that much, Xena, not to know that you're the one that lives in my heart." "I shouldn't have doubted you that way," the warrior replied. "You're not alone, I'd be doing the same thing if our positions were reversed," Gabrielle replied. "The time I spent with Ella reminded me a lot of being with Lila. I never thought once about her in any other way." "Sorry," Xena responded sincerely. "What about Tai and Emery, Xe?" Gabrielle changed the subject. "You'll keep your promise," Xena answered. "But, will you be able to love them?" Xena leaned back again, once again holding the smaller woman against the warrior's chest. She rested her chin atop the golden head. "Children are easy to love," Xena answered noncommittally. "Like your own, Xe? Could you love them like your own?" Gabrielle asked. "I'll try, Brie. I'll try very hard. Okay?" Gabrielle silently nodded her head. "Is that what you want, my heart? For me to love these girls like I would have loved Brianna?" Xena asked after a moment's pause. "I guess what I want is for you to wake me up in the middle of the night sometime, just to tell me yes, that you could love these children just like your own. It sounds silly, doesn't it?"
"No love, not silly at all. I will try, I promise. Hey, you ready to get some sleep?" "As a second choice, it sounds pretty good." Gabrielle answered. "Second choice? And just what would your first choice be?" Xena questioned with a sly grin, already knowing the answer. Gabrielle pulled away and rose, turning back to the warrior; she bent down and whispered into Xena's ear. The warrior's eyebrows disappeared under ebony bangs, a slow blush creeping into her cheeks at the Queen's words. Gabrielle laughed and pulled Xena to her feet. "Ready to get some rest?" "You expect me to sleep, after that?" Xena exclaimed. "Just consider it a debt that that still needs to be repaid," Gabrielle chuckled. * * *
"Mama…" Tai's small voice cried. Xena hadn't slept yet, lying on her back staring at the roof of the tent. One arm around Gabrielle who had her head nestled comfortable on the warrior's chest, the other bent at the elbow, hand tucked under her head. She waited to see if the youngster was dreaming or awake. Continued sniffles convinced her it was the latter. "Tai?" Xena whispered. As soon as the warrior whispered the child's name, Tai was at her side in a shot. Pressed up against the tall woman's side, Xena felt like a sandwich between Gabrielle and the girl.
"Hey there, kiddo. You okay?" Xena asked. Tai nodded slowly. "Scary dreams of the bad man," the child-like voice said.
Too damn young for nightmares, especially ones where her own father is the villain. "Yeah, I know what those are like." "You have scary dreams too?" "Yeah. I used to get them a lot, but not so much anymore." "Why?" Xena smiled. "Because Brie makes them go away." "But, why?" Somewhere in the back of her mind, Xena knew this line of questioning would end in a vicious circle, but she decided to take a run at it. "Just because she can." Xena knew she chickened out on that one. She had memories of her own mother's voice saying, 'because I said so, dear, that's why!' "The bad dreams will go away soon, Tai, just you wait and see." Xena ran a hand through the fine blond hair, now resting on her stomach. Looking between Tai and Gabrielle, the warrior smirked into the dark. "Bookends. Meet Xena, Warrior Pillow," she whispered to herself. "Wha?" Tai asked. Nothing," Xena replied with a low chuckle. Tai scooted her body up until she was lying beside the warrior, the child's face inches away from Xena's own.
"Hi there," the warrior said, trying not to laugh. "Hi," Tai grinned. "I like her," Tai said, watching Gabrielle's beautiful face as the Queen slept. "Me too," Xena responded. "Xena, I'm cold," Tai snuggled against the warrior. Xena lifted the blanket a small way. "Come here you." Tai wiggled her small body under the blanket, resting her head on Xena's shoulder. The warrior soon found her arm locked around the youngster. "Can I really stay with you…for always?" Tai whispered, tickling Xena's ear. The warrior turned to look into the earnest face, blonde hair framing large green eyes, ironically enough the color of Gabrielle's. "Is that what you'd like?" Tai nodded enthusiastically. "Why?" Xena asked, curious as to what was running through the child's brain. "Cuz you and Brie are strong," Tai whispered. "So, when somebody comes and wants ta hurt me, you wouldn't let 'em. You could beat 'em up. I would be real good too. I would do what I wuz told an' I would be very, very good an' I would try not to eat too much, just small itsy bitsy pieces. Then you would be happy, cuz I would be your little girl." Xena thought it was fortunate they were lying in a darkened tent. She felt hot tears run down the side of her face. The warrior's heart broke for the small girl who would try so hard, to simply be wanted and loved. Leaning down, Xena placed a gentle kiss on the child's forehead.
"You already are our little girl, Tai, and I won't let anybody say any different. I know you'll try your best to be good and that will be always good enough for us, but I don't want to ever hear that you're not eating as much as you should. Okay?" Tai snuggled herself against Xena's neck. The warrior could feel the tiny smile against her skin. Within moments, she noted the telltale breathing, steady and deep, indicating the child was asleep. Xena cried a few more tears, thinking of the girl who could very well be her own daughter. The warrior brushed the tears away and turned to her wife. "Brie? Honey, wake up." "Hmmm?" Gabrielle finally tried to open sleepy green eyes. "I need to tell you something," Xena whispered. "I'm awake…" Xena chuckled. "Then how come your eyes are still closed?" "Are they?" Gabrielle answered. "I just thought it was really dark in here." "Are you really awake?" Finally, the eyes opened and Xena waited a moment until she could tell that the green orbs actually focused in on her. Then, the warrior leaned over and kissed Gabrielle soundly, placing a second kiss on the tip of her nose. "Mmm, what was that for? Not that I'm complaining mind you." "That, my heart, means the answer is yes." "Okay. What was the question?" Xena chuckled. "Yes, I can love these children just like our own."
Gabrielle's eyes opened further and she half sat up before she spied the tiny figure tucked against the warrior's frame. The Queen smiled broadly, then tears filled her eyes. "I love you. You do know that, don't you?" Gabrielle whispered softly. Xena looked into her wife's face, serious green eyes staring back at her with so much love and adoration, it was hard to miss. "Yes, my heart, and I'll try every day of my life to be worthy of such a wonderful woman's love." The two women knew they should get some sleep, looking ahead to a day of wondering what the Gods had planned for them. Neither of them could will their bodies to rest and they whispered long into the night, making plans and discussing what the future might bring them.
CHAPTER 19
"STILL?" ARES' VOICE boomed out when he saw the old woman muttering under her breath, standing in front of the illusionary cell that still held Apollo. "How long does it take anyway?" Bedilia arched an eyebrow and glared out of one raised eyelid at the dark-haired God. Apollo stood beside Morpheus, fixing a perturbed stare in his brother's direction. "It takes time, Ares." Apollo said in answer. "I know, I know. Hey, Apollo…come 'ere," Ares indicated the far end of the cell. "I saw what you did, thank you, Ares." Apollo thanked his brother with
tears in his eyes. "It wasn't much," the dark-haired God mumbled. "It was to me," Apollo answered sincerely. "Yeah, well…she's a pretty good kid, I guess. Look, Bro, let me ask you something…" Bedilia rose and wrapped her fingers around the imaginary bars in front of the cell. She moved them along the entire length until she was standing next to Ares. The God paused and looked down at the old woman. "Do you mind? This is kinda private." Ares said out of the side of his mouth. Bedilia simply ignored the God and moved away of her own accord. "Geez, that old broad has got some attitude," Ares whispered. "Look, Bro, I wanted to ask you…I mean, I was talking with Gabrielle and she said something that kind of triggered something, you know? Anyway, I just thought I'd ask. Why did you really ask me to be Gabrielle's Epitropos ?" Apollo smiled at his brother's sincere question. The sandy-haired God wished many times that his brother would someday be able to honor his commitment as Epitropos , or Guardian, to his daughter. Apollo had made the offer in good faith, but once Ares learned of the Warrior Princess' involvement with Apollo's daughter, a rift developed. "Ares," Apollo smiled gently. "I asked you because you are my brother and I knew I could count on you." Ares nodded his head. "Just had to be sure." Both Gods turned their heads at the stranger that materialized beside
them. Outside the cell, Ares drew his sword, since no one but Hera was supposed to know where they were. Bedilia and Apollo both exchanged perplexed looks. "Ella?" they both asked in unison. "What? Oh!" the stranger's voice was one the Gods recognized. "Boy oh boy! This gal's wardrobe is a fashion nightmare," Ella said as her face and body began to change shape. A heartbeat later Aphrodite stood before the stunned trio. "Aphrodite?" they all asked. "I thought there was something strange about your mind," Bedilia commented. "Yeah, you almost ruined it for me grandma. I had to hide out inside this gal's mind just to hide from you. Man, what a lot of guilt there is there!" "Dite, what's going on?" Ares asked in confusion. "Well, it's sort of complicated, but I couldn't let little Gabrielle go through this alone," Aphrodite explained. "Okay, Aphrodite, you better start at the beginning," Apollo chided. "Oh, all right! See, Artie told me what happened to the bard and that you guys were putting out the feelers for her, but no go. She told me to keep my eyes open. Well, I have this little temple outside Pella, you know what some of these mortals leave as an offering, why just the other day--" "Aphrodite!" Apollo called out. "Gabrielle?" "Oh, yea. Well, in wanders this poor, skinny looking thing with two little kids. She looked like she hadn't eaten in a week. She gave me the only thing she had, this old looking necklace. She put it on the altar, tucked
her kids around her, and fell asleep. Poor thing, she just never woke up, and next thing I know Celesta shows up. Her little girl was crying and I didn't know what to do, I mean I couldn't leave the little rugrats on their own…so I…uhm…" "You became Ella," Bedilia finished in amazement. "Uh huh," Aphrodite nodded her head. "I mean, I was only going to do it until I could figure out something to do with the little squirts, but…they kinda grow on you, ya know?" "Then you ran into Gabrielle," Apollo added. "I didn't even know her at first, zowie, she had that mind of hers locked up tighter than Tartarus! I told Artie right away, what I was doing and how I ran into her Queen. She told me not to tell her anymore and to stick with the bard. She spilled the beans about what Hera was up to and told me to keep my thoughts to myself and not let anyone find out where we were. I haven't seen sis since." "So, that's why Artemis hasn't been seen," Ares noted. "She probably didn't want to take a chance on Hera catching her thoughts. If my guess is right, our sister went in search of Zeus. He's the only one who can control Hera." "Perhaps not the only one," Bedilia responded, clapping her hands with a flourish. The shimmering bars faded from sight and Apollo and Morpheus were, at last, able to walk out of the cell. "All right!" Ares exclaimed. "Hey wait a minute," the dark-haired God turned back to Aphrodite. "Why didn't you pull Gabrielle out of the water?" "Oh, uhm…about that," Aphrodite let out a nervous laugh. "I think I must have hit my head or something when I hit that water, 'cause all of a
sudden, I was this Ella, ya know? It wasn't till I woke up, leagues down stream, that I knew what in the world even happened to me. Sorry, Bro," she looked in Apollo's direction. "By the time I popped back, the little Queen ran into her warrior and everything seemed hunky dory." "Aphrodite," Apollo hugged his sister. "Thank you so much." "I learned an awful lot about that little girl of yours. She's pretty special," Aphrodite replied. "May I suggest we all move this party to a spot less accessible to Hera?" Bedilia suggested. They all agreed and left for the one place Bedilia knew they could protect against Hera…the Hall of the Fates. * * *
It was the next evening before they arrived in the Amazon Village. They were tired and had much to tell the Amazons and the Queen Regent. Gabrielle sat with Ephiny, explaining the highlights of what occurred during her absence, while Xena and Eponin met with the Village warriors, preparing them for the eventuality of Hera's visit. The Queen and her Consort both expected Hera to show up in person this time. She would be angry and unreasonable at having lost and Xena and Gabrielle didn't want to lose Amazonia or its inhabitants over the out of control Goddess. The warrior and her bard made love that first night back. They were exhausted and it was by no means earth shattering, rather tender and gentle, enough to confirm the love and commitment they held for one another. They thought it would be harder than it was to get Tai to sleep in the other room with her baby sister. Xena and Gabrielle wondered if they should
allow the girls to stay in their room, but Tai seemed genuinely thrilled at the prospect of a room of her own. The youngster only asked if she could keep a lantern lit for the night. The warrior figured it was a small price to pay and both women were surprised that the girl slept through the entire night without waking. The next morning Xena and Gabrielle talked, not just of one thing, but of a hundred. They realized that although Hera's spell caused both women undue guilt, it was the tiny seed of their own true culpability that helped the Goddess' spell to flourish. Promises of love and forever punctuated their discussion, which stopped abruptly because of one fully rested five-year-old. Gabrielle and Xena took both children around the Village. Showing the girls their new home, introducing them to the people of the Village, and cautioning Tai about where she could and could not go. Later, after their shared midday meal, Xena sat outside on the veranda, Tai remaining by the warrior's side, much to Gabrielle's amusement and Xena's consternation. The Queen kept Emery inside, feeding the baby with the ingenious skins one of the other Amazons presented to her. They were small waterskins that could be filled with milk, having a nipple fashioned at one end. Emery seemed fussy about eating; stopping far short of what Gabrielle thought a baby should be eating. The Queen questioned Sartori and the Healer confirmed that babies would eat as much as they needed, and since the child seemed healthy and content, it obviously wasn't hurting her. Gabrielle sat at her desk, near the window, listening to the questions Tai threw in quick succession in Xena's direction. "Was dis, Xena? Ooh, look at dat! Can you do dis?" Xena surprised the young Queen. The warrior seemed neither harried nor put out by the young girl's questions, answering them all and teaching at the same time. Finally, the young girl tired and came to stand beside the seated warrior. Xena felt the small body as Tai sat beside her on the steps leading up to
the veranda. The youngster hadn't said anything else in a long while, but the warrior could feel the weight of the girl's stare. "What was your baby's name?" Tai finally asked. Xena raised an eyebrow, wondering if Gabrielle had mentioned their daughter. "Brianna," the warrior answered, unable to remember if she'd said the name aloud before this. "You miss her?" "Xena looked at the youngster, unsure if Tai was asking a question or stating fact. "Yes, very much. I…I never really had the time to get to know her." "I miss my mama." "I know you do, Tai," Xena answered reaching out to touch the child's face. I know how that can hurt, losing someone that you love very much." "Mama says good people go to Fields," Tai stated. Xena smiled. "That's right. It's called Elysium and It's full of grassy hills and pretty woods, and they laugh and play music all day long. The sun always shines and it's never dark," Xena explained. "Is little Bri dere, too?" Xena chuckled at Tai's discernment between Gabrielle and Brianna. "No, Brianna is an Amazon, so she goes where all the Amazons go. Someone will take care of her there, just like Gabrielle and I would here. You know, Tai, the dead can hear our thoughts. If you want to talk to your mother, all you ever have to do is think about her, and she'll be able to hear you." "Okay," Tai smiled up at the warrior. Gabrielle sat inside, listening to the conversation that was taking place near her window. She smiled once more at the child's resilience and her
warrior's loving patience with the girl. "Are you a good warrior, Xena?" Tai asked. Once again, the youngster was able to make Xena smile. "Some people think I'm pretty good." The youngster inched her way closer to the dark-haired woman. "Would you teach me?" "I suppose," Xena answered quietly. "Mama said I should be strong when we left home. I don' feel like it, Xena." The young girl sniffed and moved closer until Xena pulled the child into her lap. The warrior reached down and brushed the unruly blonde hair back that fell into the youngster's eyes. "I know how you feel, Tai. Sometimes it's so hard when everyone expects you to be strong, but you don't feel very strong at all." "Oh," the girl answered. Xena realized she hadn't really given the child an answer she could use. "Sometimes, Tai, you just have to realize that it's okay for a warrior to cry." No sooner were the words out of the warrior's mouth, before the young girl turned her head into Xena's chest, tears falling from sad green eyes. The dark-haired woman held the girl and stroked her hair, allowing her own eyes to mist over. Gabrielle shed her own silent tears, listening to the exchange outside. * * *
Hades form materialized within the large Hall of the Fates. "We feared…" "You would be unable…" "To keep your end of the bargain." The three Fates said as one. "This is a debt I owe as well, however there were reasons to give as to why the Princess' soul did not arrive in the Amazon land of the dead." "I think I may be able to convince the sisters of those lands of the importance of our request," Bedilia responded. Hades and Apollo met one another and the older God put his arms around his nephew in a heartfelt display of affection. "A gift for you to give to your daughter," Hades said. The God held out a small silver box with a hinged lid. The ornately decorated box felt as if it were alive, an age-old power pulsing from within. "Thank you, I don't know how to repay you for this," Apollo replied in a broken voice. A breathless Ares materialized before them all. "It's show time, folks. Hera's making her move." * * *
Xena and Gabrielle sat in front of the fire, the evenings finally having grown cold enough to need one. They relaxed and enjoyed a cup of wine before going to sleep for the night. They sat side-by-side, leaning in to one another as though the touch alone gave each of them strength.
Gabrielle turned her head to look at her wife. The flames from the fireplace dancing within sparkling blue eyes. "What?" Xena asked without turning her head. Gabrielle smiled at her wife's senses. "We've changed so much, haven't we?" Xena turned then, wanting to read the expression in her wife's face. The warrior returned the smile, realizing the small blonde meant it in an introspective, rather than bad, way. "I guess we have. It's funny; I've so often thought that you began following my path, simply because I was the one doing the leading, that because I was a warrior, you became a warrior. I used to think that I left you no choice, but to change who you were; to become me. Pretty arrogant thinking, huh?" Gabrielle smiled; understanding the direction the conversation headed. "Not arrogant, love, merely an assumption, laced with a little guilt, I suspect. Xena, our paths were so different at first. It's a testament to our love…our friendship really. That two people, so opposite, could come together and grow. It tells me we truly are soulmates." Gabrielle reached over and brushed a strand of raven hair from her Consort's cheek, letting her fingertips graze the skin there. "If a stranger were to look at us now, they'd think that I gave up my way for yours. They would only see a peace-loving bard who took up the path of a warrior. It looks so different standing from where I do. I see two women whose paths crisscross and intersect so often that it's hard to tell where one starts and the other ends. I see two women who have grown so much, a bard who's a warrior-Queen…a gentle woman who learned to be hard. I see a Warrior Princess turned Consort…a hard woman who learned to be gentle. Some days I look at the two of us, Xe, and I think that you're walking my path, just as much as you think I'm walking yours." "When did you get to be so smart?" Xena asked. Gabrielle chuckled, then her expression turned serious. "I never thanked
you, Xe…for being so strong for me after we lost Brianna." The pain flooded into Xena's features and she furrowed her brow to contain the wave of emotion that threatened to break loose. The warrior felt Gabrielle's arms go around her, suddenly finding her own head resting on the soft shoulder of her wife. "Let me be strong for you now," Gabrielle said. The Queen remembered the words the warrior spoke to Tai underneath her window. She also remembered the strain in the warrior's voice at holding back her own tears. "Sometimes, Xe, you just have to realize that it's okay for a warrior to cry." The bard's words hit Xena at exactly the right moment. The very ones she used to allow Tai the freedom to express her grief were the words that broke down the walls holding the warrior's pain inside. The dark-haired woman cried, safe and protected, in the arms of the young woman who shed tears of a similar sadness. Some time later, long after the flames of the fire burned down into glowing embers, the two women wrapped a fur robe around their bodies and drifted off to sleep.
CHAPTER 20
GABRIELLE WOKE UP the next morning in bed, vaguely aware that her wife carried her there before the sun rose. Finding the space next to her unoccupied, she saw a scroll wrapped up, laying on the pillow, along with a beautiful orchid. She smiled to herself, already knowing who had left the gift. Opening the scroll, she saw a smaller piece of parchment rolled up inside. The large scroll had a quick note scrawled on it.
Tai and I went off fishing, we'll bring back some fresh lunch. I left Emery with Maris and Kiana so you could do your Queenly stuff today. See you at lunch,
X
The second parchment was sealed with a small bit of wax and the pendant that Xena wore around her neck, a gift from Gabrielle on the day they were engaged. The Queen opened the parchment and had to keep the paper held away from her so her tears wouldn't destroy the beautiful words her wife had written there. Xena wrote down her thoughts on few occasions, but they were always profound and heartfelt. LOOKING BACK AT YOU As I stand alone on the line between this world and the next, I look back among the days of my life. There , in every joyous moment, you were at the center, holding me up higher, guiding me towards the sun. You, the only reason I ever was anything respectable; my strength, my light my soul and my heart.
If there is but one thing on this earth I will miss, it's the undying passion and love I felt in every kiss, and every touch, and every time we made love. I can't believe that one person could change me so, but you truly did. All that I am is because of you and for as long as I have any sort of existence , I will love you.
X
Gabrielle could do little else but cry for a long time. Her wife rarely expressed her emotions and even then, only to Gabrielle. When the warrior did reveal her heart, it always moved the small blonde to tears. Gabrielle took the time to prepare herself to face her council. She promised herself that she wouldn't turn into a coward, but that she would meet her sisters and apologize for leaving them in the manner she had. The young Queen needn't have worried at all. The members of the council, along with her Regent, greeted her with open arms and loving embraces. Once again, Gabrielle thanked Artemis for all the young woman had been given in her life.
* * *
"Show me again, Xena! Please?" Tai jumped up and down along side the tall woman. Xena and Tai caught nearly a whole basket of fish. They were just returning from their early morning expedition. Crossing the center of the Village, they made their way to the food hut to give the majority of them to the cook. The youngster was completely taken with Xena's chakram and begged the warrior for another demonstration. "Okay," Xena chuckled and put the basket on the ground. With a practiced hand, she tossed the round weapon away from her. Tai watched, completely mesmerized, as the object struck two trees and a tent pole before returning to Xena's waiting hand. The warrior clutched the chakram, pulling it from the air and watched as Tai jumped up and down, clapping her hands. That's when the warrior felt it. It was a tingling feeling, the same warning sensation she felt when Ares was near, but this one was slightly different. This sensation seemed tinged with something like malice, some sort of sensation that caused a moment of fear to run through the warrior. She bent down and pulled Tai close, whispering in the child's ear. The youngster looked up into serious blue eyes, turned, and ran. Xena watched until Tai ran up the stairs and disappeared into the hut where the Queen's council met. Even as the shape materialized behind her, Xena knew who it was. "Hera!" the warrior sneered, turning to face the Goddess. "Doing all your dirty work yourself now?" "Xena…you and that Amazon slut have more lives than a pair of cats." Hera watched the warrior's jaw tighten, but Hera could see that Xena
wasn't about to give in unless the Goddess played her trump card. "You'll never know how truly satisfying it was, Xena, to feel my hands around your baby's life force…as I ripped it from Gabrielle's body!" Xena drew her sword even as her body was in mid air. The warrior gave in to her anger, going against everything her instincts told her. She launched her body at Hera, only to be thrown backward by a bolt of power hurled into her midsection. The blow not only knocked her from her feet, but flung her halfway across the Village, to land in a freshly stacked pile of firewood. Xena shook her head to clear away the cobwebs, cursing herself for her own stupidity. She should have known that Hera would fight dirty. Xena tried to get to her feet, but was immediately hit with another surge of power that left her flat on her back. "I can do this all day, Xena, and believe me I will. I'm going to crush every bone in your body and then have you watch while I do the same thing to that abomination of Apollo's," Hera promised. The Goddess drew her arm back for another blow intended to pulverize internal organs, but instead she met with a woman's scream and a burning sensation in her arm. "Nooo!" Gabrielle shouted out, her own arm pitching forward. The young Queen rushed from the hut, stepping in between the Goddess and the fallen warrior. Gabrielle had no idea what was happening or what she was doing, but reacted on instinct alone. A white-hot orb of power shot from the young Queen's hand, hitting Hera's arm and knocking the bolt of power aside to skitter harmlessly in the dirt. The Goddess screamed in frustration, turning toward her attacker. Hera's entire face calmed when she realized who had thrown the energy bolt. Pale eyes gleamed and she offered up one of her infamously evil smiles. "Oh, my little Amazon, do you really think you're strong enough to play with me?" Hera didn't hesitate. The Goddess hurled two energy-laden spheres at the small blonde. Gabrielle bent to retrieve her sais, pulling them effortlessly
free of her boots, and successfully deflected each bolt of power with the handles. Hera watched with almost an air of admiration, right before she launched a half a dozen more of the objects at the young woman. Gabrielle was able to deflect the first five, but the last one hit her shoulder, causing her weapon to sail from her grasp. The force of the blow slammed her to the ground. "Gabrielle!" Xena shouted out, rising to her feet. Hera laughed at the warrior's attempt. "Watch, Xena, see how this feels," Hera laughed aloud as she tossed an even stronger bolt of pure energy at the young Queen who was trying to stand. Xena remembered hearing her own scream just before the blue orb slammed into Gabrielle's chest. Suddenly the flat part of a large blade appeared before Gabrielle, deflecting the bolt. Ares and Apollo both stood between Gabrielle and Hera causing another scream of anger from the Goddess. "You have really got to start picking on folks your own size," Ares smirked. "You will regret this, Ares," Hera screamed. The Goddess turned to Xena, the warrior on her feet, but unprotected from the angry Goddess' weapons of destruction. Before Hera could attack, the center of the Amazon Village filled with Gods. Athena stood before Xena, while Aphrodite, Hephaestus, Hermes, and finally Hades flanked Hera. As if on cue, the Gods used their own combined energy to form a restraint of sorts around Hera. The Amazon Village was silent as its residents looked upon more Gods than many did in an entire lifetime. They knew of their Queen being the daughter of Apollo, but seeing Gabrielle's newfound powers displayed before them like this, it stunned them into silence. "Father?" Gabrielle asked, to see Apollo turn to her with a smile on his
face. The God swept the young woman into his embrace, his golden armor gleaming brightly. With the bow that he was an expert with slung across his back and his traditional gold helmet atop his head, he looked every bit the hero. "Gabrielle," he whispered. "I've missed you so much, my child." The Queen quickly turned her head at the sound of her warrior's battle cry. Xena, sword in hand, charged toward Hera, obviously ready to attempt to destroy the Goddess if she could. "Xena!" Gabrielle shouted. Hades and Ares both moved forward to intercept the warrior. One God on each side of the struggling warrior, they held her back from the Goddess. Gabrielle rushed to Xena's side, attempting to calm the distraught woman. "Xena, please wait," Apollo moved to stand before Xena. "You don't understand, Apollo. She killed my child!" Xena hissed through her tears. "Because that's what she's good at." The deep voice came from behind them and when they turned to see whom the voice belonged to, no one was more surprised than Xena. "Hercules?" Xena and Gabrielle said almost in unison. Hercules drew closer, followed by Artemis, and an older man that Gabrielle didn't recognize. The handsome God wrapped strong arms first around Xena, then Gabrielle.< "I know exactly what you're going through," Hercules whispered to Xena. Xena knew that Hera destroyed her friend's family just as the Goddess had taken Brianna's life. "I know," she whispered back.
Artemis gently offered a kiss on the forehead to Gabrielle, then moving to her twin brother's side, sharing an embrace and a smile. "Hey, when those two say they're going to get away from it all for a while," she nodded her head in Hercules' direction, "they really mean it. You don't know how many places I had to look before I found them," Artemis answered. "Ahh," the old man stepped in front of Gabrielle. "So, this is my granddaughter. You've done well, Apollo." "You're Zeus?" Gabrielle asked. "Yes, I am. Disappointed?" "A little," Gabrielle arched an eyebrow at the God. "I think you need to keep a tighter leash on your wife." Those in attendance took a collective breath and held it. Xena couldn't hide the smile that played across her face. Her wife would never be one to be impressed with someone if it wasn't deserved. Zeus laughed aloud at the young woman's forward remark. "Cheeky, my dear Gabrielle, but sadly true. It wasn't always like this," Zeus shook his head and turned his face toward his own wife. "Hera has always been headstrong, but it has been my own wayward actions that have made her into the jealous and bitter woman she now is. Do you know that our wedding was such a happy occasion that it lasted for three hundred seasons?" "You are a bard, Gabrielle. Have you ever heard tell of the time that Hera stole my thunderbolt?" Zeus asked. Gabrielle gave a small smile, wondering if the God had a repeat plan in mind. "Yes, Hera dared to steal the thunderbolt that belonged to the King of the Gods. It's said that you punished her by hanging her in the sky with anvils tied to her feet, and didn't free her until she repented."
"Quite true, too," Zeus added. "For a hundred seasons the stubborn woman hung there, too. For this, attempting to destroy my children and my children's children…I fear it may be a great deal longer this time, don't you, my dear?" he asked of his wife. Having said those words, Zeus and Hera both disappeared. Gabrielle moved into her wife's embrace, while the Gods around them looked on in approval. Tai had finally freed herself from Ephiny's grasp, running on tiny legs and jumping into Xena's arms. "See, I told you so," Tai whispered into the warrior's ear. "What?" "I knew you and Bri wuz strong. I knew you could beat up anybody." Both women laughed, mostly at the youngster who seemed to have an innate ability to let life roll so easily off her back. They introduced Apollo to Tai, the young woman taking to the kind hearted God immediately. Tai still looked at Ares with an air of distrust and Xena wasn't in a hurry to dispel any of the youngster's notions of the God of War. The Fates appeared, along with Bedilia. Gabrielle and the old woman embraced, while Xena and the oracle met for the second time. Bedilia handed over a silver box to Apollo and the old woman spoke for the group. There were things Bedilia didn't reveal to the young Queen, her future, and what the oracle knew Gabrielle and Xena's destinies to be. Bedilia convinced Aphrodite to tell Gabrielle the story of Ella once the confusion was at an end. The old woman thought it important for Gabrielle to know that the events in Ella's life were all true, but the friend the young Queen met and learned to love, was none other than Aphrodite herself. Besides, Bedilia knew that Gabrielle held a bit of guilt over Ella's death. The oracle wanted the young Queen to know what really happened, and what would have happened to Tai and Emery had the Queen and
Aphrodite not crossed paths. "Gabrielle and Xena, you have both been a friend to the Olympians, and on many occasions your faithfulness has been repaid in less than a satisfying manner. We would like to repay our debts to the both of you with this gift." Bedilia motioned to Apollo, who stepped forward with a smile on his face. The sandy-haired God opened the hinged lid and scooped his hand into the velvet-lined box. Withdrawing his hand, he held it out before Xena and Gabrielle, displaying a bright swirling orb of multicolored sparkles. The sphere pulsed and emanated something that felt like emotions. Xena drew her own hand closer and felt, rather than saw, what the God held in his hand. Tears filled the warrior's eyes as she looked down at Gabrielle. The Queen's face was one of confusion and uncertainty as Xena took the smaller woman's hand and drew it toward Apollo's hand. Gabrielle smiled and cried at the same time. "This is Brianna's life force. The Princess wasn't fated to make the journey to the Amazon lands just yet. This," Apollo held up the sphere that began to burn brighter, "belongs to the two of you. It's your decision, however. You've been through a great deal up to this point and I have no wish to make this harder on you than it's already been." Xena looked at Gabrielle, excitement, and happiness evident in the warrior's face. The tall woman watched as Gabrielle's brow furrowed together and the young woman pulled back slightly. "Brie…what is it? Don't you want this?" "I--" Gabrielle swallowed nervously. "What if something happens again, Xe? I don't…I don't know if I could handle it a second time." Xena's heart ached for her wife, wishing she could take the pain of that day from the small blonde's memory. The warrior looked first at Gabrielle, then at Apollo. "I only want what you want, Brie. I know this is scary and it hurts to think about what already happened."
"Gabrielle," Apollo said softly. "It's never a good thing for mortals to know too much about their future, but in this case, I think I can show you something that will ease your fears. I want the both of you to place your hands on top of mine," he commanded. Gabrielle first looked up at Xena. "It's all right, my heart. Give me your hand, Brie," Xena directed. Gabrielle offered her hand up to her wife without hesitation. Xena took the small hand within her own and placed both of them atop Apollo's hand. The two women felt the heat as the shimmering light spilled through their fingers, filling their minds with disjointed pictures, racing from one scene to the next. The young Queen smiled at last, watching the images in her mind's eye change from a laughing baby to a grown woman, dark hair and eyes a brilliant emerald green. The young woman was first a student, a warrior, peacemaker, and then Queen. Neither Gabrielle nor Xena could linger long enough on any one image to see the story that went alone with it, but the feelings were there. The emotions swept through each woman just as if they were experiencing the actions. The smile was enough for Xena as she gave her wife one of her own and pulled their hands back from the light. Gabrielle nodded to Apollo. "Yes, father. Please," Gabrielle asked. A gentle smile creased Apollo's face. The God moved his hand and pressed his palm against Gabrielle's abdomen, the light spilling from his hand, and melding its way into the Queen's body. Apollo took a step away and watched as Gabrielle gasped, reaching for Xena's hand. The small blonde took the warrior's hand and placed it where Apollo's had just been. Xena felt the life in her wife's body jump beneath her hand, bringing the warrior to tears. Then Xena did something very out of character. Gabrielle watched as her wife took a step forward and wrapped her arms around
Apollo, placing a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you…thank you so much," she whispered, her voice breaking with emotion. It was a tearful, yet happy time for all. The pain of the past few weeks melted away as a new happiness took hold in their hearts. Not only would they have two daughters who would always be the children of their hearts, but also Xena and Gabrielle were once again expecting their first baby. Once the Village cleared of most of the Gods, the Amazons were able to gather their wits about them, offering the Queen and her Consort their congratulations. Gabrielle embraced Bedilia once again. "I'll miss you, Bedilia." "I'll miss you too, Gabrielle," the old woman answered as she and the Queen walked a short distance away from the others. "You've come a long way, young Queen. Have you made your choice yet?" "Choice?" Gabrielle echoed. "Which path you will walk," Bedilia clarified. Gabrielle smiled. "I think I'll choose the path of a Queen." Bedilia raised an eyebrow in question and Gabrielle explained further. "One of my own making," the Queen enlightened. "I find that I have to be many things for many people; bard, warrior, wife, and mother, but Queen…" Gabrielle smiled again. "I walk the path of a Queen for myself and no one else."
EPILOGUE
GABRIELLE SIGNED THE last few declarations before her and pushed aside the mug of tea that had long since grown cold. She was making an early day of it after having received a message from Xena earlier. The scroll her warrior sent was equal parts mystery and seduction. The warrior's message said that the children were spending the night with Ephiny and the Queen should hurry home from her duties. The note went on to conclude with a most intriguing line.
"I've planned an evening I hope you'll enjoy…I'm putting all my trust in you." Gabrielle reread the parchment, her mind conjuring up some rather inventive fantasies as to how her Consort would prove that last statement. They talked quite a bit over the past two weeks, discussing not only what happened that involved the two of them, but the issues that plagued each of them individually. Gabrielle decided to come to terms with the fact that she had the skills of a warrior, along with the powers of a half Goddess. Denying either one no longer seemed an option. For her part, Xena had been working on those issues she had with herself and her need for control. It wasn't an easy change to make and she and Gabrielle both knew it would take more than a matter of days for the warrior to affect a real change. Xena was changing, however, and Gabrielle noted the transformation on more than one occasion. "Now, to see what my lovely wife has planned." Gabrielle grinned to herself. * * *
Gabrielle entered their home and could tell Xena was preparing a bath in the other room. What the Queen saw walk through the door to the bathing chamber was enough to freeze her into silence. Xena stepped through the doorframe wearing little at all to cover her tall, muscular frame. In fact, the only two items the warrior had on were a decorative chain that circled her waist, actually hanging low on her hips, and a leather slave's collar, buckled around her neck. "Oh my," were the only two words Gabrielle could manage. Xena crossed the room; seemingly oblivious to the nakedness that she knew was certainly affecting Gabrielle. The tall woman moved behind the small blonde, removing her cloak. Xena's arms wrapped around her wife and the warrior whispered in Gabrielle's ear. "Would you like to play…My Queen?" Gabrielle could imagine the look of seduction in Xena's twinkling blue eyes. The small blonde watched as steam came through the bathing room door, curling as it rose to the ceiling. She glanced around the main room they used at a bedroom. Silken red sheets from Chin covered the bed, but the biggest surprise were the leather restraints tied to each of the four corners of the large bed. Gabrielle cleared her throat, willing some strength back into her knees and attempting to keep some blood flowing to her brain, the blood that was now rushing to points much further south. "I take it I'm in charge here?" she asked, hoping her wife didn't notice the catch in her voice. "As always, Mistress," Xena whispered into the smaller woman's ear before moving away and dropping to her knees in front of the bathing chambers. Gabrielle's nervousness melted away as her libido got the better of her. She made her way to the bath, attempting to remove her top at the same
time. "Allow me, my Mistress," Xena said, quickly moving to stand beside the small blonde, making short work of the leathers Gabrielle wore. The Queen smiled at the control the warrior displayed. Xena removed Gabrielle's clothes without a hint of seduction, rather as a slave would serve a master. Once Gabrielle's back was turned, however, Xena couldn't help but sneak a glance at the shapely figure as it descended into the steamy water. Xena waited patiently, her gaze steady; head lowered just a touch. The warrior owned enough of her own slaves to know the proper behavior and the ways in which to show the proper respect. She especially knew the actions a body slave would perform to convince her Mistress that the possessor was in charge. Xena picked up the bathing cloth and moved toward the young Queen, who was obviously enjoying the feel of the hot water on her tired body. Working the soap into a lather with the cloth, Xena prepared to bathe the Queen when Gabrielle opened her eyes. "No cloth. Just use your hands," the blonde commanded. Gabrielle was feeling every bit the Mistress and she was determined to enjoy this scenario for all it was worth. Xena hesitated for a heartbeat and Gabrielle decided that she would simply pretend that she was Xena, from her Warlord days. The bard heard all the tales, even the ones told as bawdy stories in the taverns. Her wife's proclivities were well known in those days and Gabrielle decided to use what she knew in this fantasy. Xena dropped the bath cloth, lathered her hands with the soap, and began to slide them down the length of Gabrielle's body. Down and up, Xena covered Gabrielle's body in soap, but drew to a halt when her downward moving fingers rested against the edge of golden curls. Gabrielle leaned against the back of the tub, parting her thighs. "Keep
moving in that direction," she said, a carnal smile spreading across her lips. Xena closed her eyes, willing her body not to respond. Remember, you don't have to be in control here…this is for her. Xena's hand continued its downward motion, her fingers mingling with the smooth wetness that had little to do with the bath water. Gabrielle tilted her head back and moaned, spreading her legs open further. The sound nearly undid the warrior. She let her fingers linger, teasing as they circled the hardened nub that screamed for attention. She allowed her fingers to explore, dragging the wetness from its source upward. Gabrielle's body jerked, her mound thrusting against the fingers, coming closer and closer to screaming her release. On the downward stroke of Xena's hand, the Queen thrust herself at the invading fingers, groaning loudly as the digits penetrated her, pressing deeply into her. It didn't take long. Xena began thrusting two fingers into Gabrielle's swollen core, the warrior's speed, and power increasing as Gabrielle's hips dictated. Gabrielle's shout as her climax hit thankfully covered the loud, frustrated groan that Xena verbally expressed. Xena slowly moved her hand away from its intimate refuge, enjoying the way the bard's inner muscles clutched possessively at the receding fingers. Gods, she'll be the death of me! Xena's mind screamed. Gabrielle was still for a few moments longer, and then shook her head to take possession of herself once more. Gods, she'll be the death of me! Gabrielle turned her head and grinned up at her wife. Xena couldn't help herself as she grinned in return. Snaking a hand around the warrior's neck, Gabrielle pulled Xena into a kiss that left both of them struggling for air. Pulling away first, Gabrielle rewarded Xena with a very smug smile. "I think I'm clean enough for one day."
Xena offered a hand and led the small blonde from the bath, drying the Queen with an oversized towel. Gabrielle turned around and stood face to face with the warrior, watching the drops of water that had splashed onto Xena's dark skin, roll down her torso. The Queen grabbed a towel, but came up with a better idea at the last moment. Leaning in close to the warrior's chest, hands on Xena's hips, Gabrielle allowed her tongue to capture the rolling drops of moisture. Xena's head rolled back and she moaned at the exquisite feel of the warm tongue as it blazed a path of fire across her breasts. Gabrielle stopped in the appropriate places to suck or nibble, but then she continued her tongue's journey. Gabrielle abruptly stopped, turning and heading for their bed, leaving Xena trying to catch her breath. "You're not going to make a habit of keeping me waiting, are you?" Gabrielle's voice shocked Xena from her pleasurable daydream. "No, Mistress," Xena answered breathlessly, rushing to the Queen's side. Xena watched as Gabrielle fingered the thick leather cuffs tied to the four corners of the bed. The Queen ran her fingers against the silky rabbit fur lining the inside of the restraints. The look in the Queen's eye as she looked up at Xena, caused the warrior to swallow hard. Gabrielle reached up and examined the leather collar wrapped around her Consort's neck. On one side, it bore the Queen's Royal crest and in the front, a hard loop was sewn into the collar. Gabrielle chuckled aloud at the thought of how red Xena must have turned asking some vendor to burn an Amazon crest into a slave's collar. The Queen's soft laughter did nothing to ease Xena's peace of mind, nor did the Queen's next action. Gabrielle breathed in the aroused scent of her wife, now her slave. "Gods, you smell good when you're excited." The words elicited a nearly silent whimper from Xena. Gabrielle hooked her index finger within the loop on the warrior's collar and pulled down slightly. "Sit," the Queen commanded.
Gabrielle dropped to her knees and parted her wife's long legs. She bent her head and Xena shivered, simply knowing what the contact of that lovely pink tongue would feel like. Gabrielle touched the outer edge of Xena's folds with her tongue and tasted the moisture that daubed the tips of the woman's dark curls. Exploring further, Gabrielle dipped her tongue in carefully, sliding it along the entire length of Xena's sex. Xena closed her eyes and moaned, shamelessly spreading her legs wider. "Please…" she begged the kneeling woman. That sound was all Gabrielle needed. She lapped greedily at the warrior's center, Xena's hips arching up to meet the tongue that penetrated deeper with each thrust. Suddenly without warning Gabrielle pulled away leaving the warrior moments away from her orgasm. "Oh, Gods…please…" seemed to be the only words Xena was capable of. "Lie down in the middle of the bed," Gabrielle demanded. Xena scrambled quickly, realizing somewhere in the back of her mind that the old Xena would have smirked, moved slower, done something to prove she was unaffected by the young Queen. The warrior knew better. She was completely and utterly under the will and whim of the Amazon Queen. Gabrielle positioned the warrior's arms above her head, one on each side of her head. Gabrielle moved to fasten the cuffs to Xena's wrists, but stopped at the frightened expression in Xena's eyes. The Queen knew she would have to do this carefully to keep her wife from experiencing a fullblown panic attack. Gabrielle touched her fingers to Xena's cheek, stroking the flesh there, gentling the warrior. Xena's blue eyes locked onto emerald green and the Queen allowed all the love and adoration she felt to come to the surface. Gabrielle slipped both restraints on the warrior's wrists, but once she buckled them tight, Xena began to breath deeply, nervously wondering if she would be able to get enough air into her lungs.
The small blonde leaned closer to the woman beneath her, feeling the warmth of their bodies pressed together, taut nipples teasing those below her, smelling the sweet scent of the dark hair. "I've got you, there's nothing to fear," Gabrielle murmured against Xena's throat. Gabrielle finally leaned in, claiming Xena's lips in a soul-searing kiss. The warrior felt her whole being respond to that kiss. The anxiety she was feeling heartbeats before, disappeared entirely when Gabrielle's knee tenderly slipped between drenched thighs. Xena's nipples tightened and an intense heat filled her body to the brim. She could feel the folds of her swollen sex rubbing along the bard's thigh, and then heard her own voice groan loudly, the sound muffled by the sultry kiss that seemed to go on forever. Gabrielle swallowed Xena's sounds of passion. The Queen replaced her knee with her fingers, relishing in the drenched feel of Xena's sex, and Gabrielle's hand moved in time to the erotic rhythm of the warrior's hips. Kneeling over her wife, Gabrielle slipped two, then three fingers inside, grinding her own center along the warrior's thigh. Xena watched, mesmerized, as Gabrielle's breasts swayed temptingly above the warrior. Xena lifted one leg, maximizing the pressure Gabrielle felt and the Queen moaned loudly, tightening her grip around her wife's muscled thigh. Xena could suddenly think of nothing else beyond her restrained arms, which prevented her from reaching out and taking what she wanted from her bard. A groan of frustration escaped her throat, but Gabrielle was determined that the warrior should be rewarded for her submission, not punished. The Queen slipped her hand from Xena's body, but before the warrior could voice her disappointment, the bard penetrated the warrior's slick passage with four fingers. "Oh Gods, yes!" Xena cried out. "Deeper…" Xena pleaded. "Yes, there…"
Gabrielle drew back and offered a breast to the warrior, who wrapped her lips around a rosy colored nipple, sucking hungrily. It was Gabrielle's turn to cry out and she began to drive her sex against the warrior's thigh, moving to the tempo her hand set inside the warrior. Xena wanted nothing more than to propel herself headlong from the edge of the cliff Gabrielle led her up to. The warrior used the last of her reserves, however, to drag the young Queen down with her. Xena tugged on the erect nipple in her mouth, gently pulling with her teeth, sucking the nub of flesh hard. Just as she felt Gabrielle's trembling body arch against her, she let herself go, leaping from the precipice into the arms of a heart stopping climax. Pleasure coursed through the warrior's body as she stiffened, crying out Gabrielle's name. Xena's body convulsed with intense spasms of delight that lasted long after the warrior gave up her last bit of control, and blacked out. Gabrielle finally withdrew her fingers, laying the palm of her hand across Xena's sex. Gabrielle felt the intermittent pulsing of her inner muscles, the sensation continuing to send shivers of pleasure sweeping through her body until she too, fell sound asleep. THE END
THE PERFECT GIFT DISCLAIMER: Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, etc. are ©copyright MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. I don't own them, I just play with them for a while and, like the good girl I am, I put them back when I'm done…okay, they get a little worn, but hey…I play hard! I intend absolutely no copyright infringement in the writing of this story. It's intended as flattery toward the creators and actors of the characters. All other characters that appear are copyright to the author.
VIOLENCE WARNING: Not in this one. It's a little bit of sentimental fluff for Valentine's Day . SEX: Not this time, guys. Some of the time, heartfelt love is enough. MESSAGE FROM THE AUTHOR: I only know how others feel about my stories from feedback. I'm at:
[email protected] *This short story is a vignette to the Queen Series. You may be a tad lost here without reading the series fromthe beginning, starting with, To Become A Queen.
THE PERFECT GIFT
"XENA, HOW MANY of dese do we have ta do?" Tai asked the tall warrior beside her. "The more we have, the better it will be," Xena answered. They stood side by side, Xena worked quickly with her sharp knife and Tai filled the wooden buckets beside them. The five year old performed her task with a screwed up face at the odor coming from the containers on the ground. Tai only came up to the warrior's knees, but she worshiped Xena and worked as hard as she could to please her new mother. Tai tossed another of the smelly objects into the bucket. She looked up at the warrior and Xena winked at the youngster. Tai didn't much enjoy this part of fishing, but she did enjoy spending time with Xena. After Tai's mother had died, Xena and Gabrielle had adopted the youngster as their own. The two women told Tai that she and her baby sister, Emery, were their little girls now. There were days when Tai still missed her mother, but Gabrielle held her at night and Xena promised to teach the youngster everything about being a warrior. Those small acts of kindness helped to keep the sad thoughts from overwhelming her. Tai had slipped one day and called Gabrielle, Mama. She didn't know why, but Tai felt so much better after saying it because Gabrielle was just like her Mama. At first she thought that Gabrielle had been upset because the Queen said Tai didn't have to call her that. Gabrielle sat down and explained what she meant and the little girl listened intently. Gabrielle simply hadn't wanted Tai to forget her mother. Tai nodded her small head in understanding, knowing however, that it just felt right to call Gabrielle that name. From that day on, Gabrielle became Mama to the youngster.
"Okay, little bit. I think we have enough now. Let's go." "Do we really need dis many?" "Oh, yea. It will make it lots better, trust me." "'Kay." Xena's head craned around the corner of the building, the rest of her body hidden by the structure. Heartbeats later, a tiny blonde head looked around the corner as well, about knee-high to the warrior. "Dere's da bad man," Tai whispered. Xena and Tai watched the two figures across the compound. Xena couldn't keep the smile from her lips, watching Gabrielle as she spoke to her uncle. The blonde Queen straightened up and a hand went to her back. She massaged the area as she continued talking with the dark-haired God. Xena's smile was meant, not only for her wife, but also for the life that Gabrielle carried inside her swollen belly. Recently, it only took a quick thought of their soon-to-arrive daughter, Brianna, for Xena to get emotional. Shaking her head, the warrior quickly returned her mind to the job before her. "Okay, little bit. Keep your head down and stay by me." Ephiny caught sight of the two from the balcony of her own small hut as they scurried through the Amazon village, hiding behind huts and tents. She watched the comical sight with an unexpected fascination. "Ep," Ephiny called out to the Village's Weapons Master. "What on earth is Xena up to?" "Don't know. She just asked me if I had an extra bucket and a ball of twine. I gave the stuff to her and she and Tai took off giggling like schoolgirls." Ephiny shook her head. "Why does that sound like trouble to me?"
Eponin chuckled. "Maybe because you know Xena as well as anyone and you also know that since Gabrielle became pregnant again, Xena's probably been good for about as long as she can stand it." "Yep, that's what I was afraid of. Oh, well," the Regent turned to go back inside. "The Warrior Princess is our Queen's headache during peacetime." * * *
"Okay, we tie the string like this," Xena explained as she worked. Tai watched in fascination as the warrior moved around the room. Xena tied the string into a series of complicated loops and knots, stringing it around the doorframe and pulling it through the door's latch. She stood on a stool to reach the top of the door, precariously balancing her precious cargo upon the upper frame. "We crouch down here, under the window, and we wait. When he comes in, as soon as the door opens just the tiniest bit…leather boy gets it. The opening door automatically trips the lever and we've got him like a rat in a trap." "Den what?" Tai asked. "Then we laugh our butts off," Xena answered, a satisfied expression on her face. "You said butt," Tai giggled. Xena smiled at the youngster's amusement. "Yea, well, warriors can say butt when we're with other warriors." "Cool."
Xena thought a moment. "Uhm...just don't tell your mom I said that." "Why? Will you get in trouble?" "You have no idea." "Is it cuz she's Queen and in charge?" "Is that what you think?" "Dunno." "Well, who do you think is in charge?" Xena asked. "You!" Tai said emphatically, pointing a tiny finger at Xena. "Why do you say that?" Xena asked. "Cuz you're bigger and stronger." Xena chuckled aloud. "Some day, little bit, you'll learn that even the smallest and weakest looking among us can be strong. Sometimes, usually just when we need it the most, the greatest heart and strength can come from the most unlikely of people. Which means, when we're here in the Amazon Village, Gabrielle's in charge." "But why?" Xena could see this going on for a while. "Because she's Queen and that makes her the most important person here." "More 'portant dan you?" Tai's expression told the warrior that the youngster was amazed. "Way more important than me. You might even be Queen one day." "Baby Bri will be Queen cuz she's your real little girl," Tai replied.
Xena paused, wondering how they had gotten onto such a complex subject. "Where did you get that idea, Tai?" "I heard somebody sayin' it," Tai evaded. "Well, that's not true. You and your sister Emery are just as much our little girls as Brianna will be. Any one of you could be Queen if you wanted it. It takes a very wise and strong woman to be Queen, though. Do you think you'd like that?" "Nope," Tai answered. "Oh, you've already made up your mind about that, have you?" Xena teased. Tai's head nodded up and down in quick jerks. "So, why don't you want to be Queen?" "Cuz mama doesn't get ta have no fun. You get ta ride Argo, and go fishin', and go huntin'. Warriors get ta have a lot more fun. I think I'll be what you are. I'm gonna guard the Queen." "Ahh, the Queen's Champion?" "Yea, that's it...Queen's Ch--Ch--thampion." Xena laughed quietly. "I know you'll be the best, little bit." Xena peeked over the windowsill and saw Gabrielle and Ares coming their way. She watched as they walked toward the home that Xena and Gabrielle shared with their girls. They stopped outside as two Amazon's approached them. Xena knew the two women. In fact, she had told them to be on the lookout in order to pull Gabrielle aside. Xena wanted to guarantee that Ares walked through that door alone. Xena and Ares had always had a rather adversdefault relationship. In the past, it had been easy for the Warrior Princess to express her dislike and
rage against the God of War. Things had changed last season, though. One of the more surprising revelations had been that Ares was not only Gabrielle's uncle, but also her mentor. Apollo had extracted the oath from his brother before Gabrielle had been born. It became Ares's duty to teach his charge everything necessary in order for Gabrielle to control her newfound godly powers. Gabrielle had finally come into her own as the daughter of Apollo and she and Ares had formed an interesting relationship. Oddly enough, Gabrielle seemed to be one of the few people who never feared offending, enraging, or even yelling at the God of War. Xena's part in their newly extended family became slightly fuzzier. She had always known where she stood with her old nemesis, but she now found that Gabrielle actually expected Xena to behave civilly around Ares for the sake of the children. Xena usually made herself scarce when Ares was in the Village with Gabrielle. So, Xena had been left with conjuring only fantasies in her mind of ways in which hurt Ares. She had been planning this latest attack for some time. It was fun, she loved the scheming and the time spent with Tai, plus it was so innocent it couldn't possibly get her into trouble with Gabrielle. To Xena, it was a win-win proposition. Aside from naptime, there were few moments during the day when Tai wasn't with Xena. At first, Xena thought she would go insane at having the pint size child as a constant companion. It didn't take long until she actually looked forward to the company each day. Gabrielle had even commented on how the warrior moped around the house when Tai had to take a nap. "I think he's coming, Xena." Tai's childlike whisper shook Xena from her musings. "You're right." She ducked her head under the windowsill, doing a last minute visual on the trap's set up. "Xena?" Tai whispered. "Ssh." Xena concentrated on the trail of beige string.
"But, Xena…" "Ssh, Tai. I hear footsteps. If he hears us we'll get caught." "But, Xena…dis is really, really 'portant." "What?" Xena finally asked in exasperation, looking down at the youngster crouched beside her under the window. "Isn't da bad man s'pposed to come in?" "Yea." "An' he comes in an' da buckets fall?" Xena watched with extreme satisfaction as the door began to open. "Yea, yea. This is it." "Den why is he over dere?" Tai pointed out the window. "Wha--?" Xena whipped her head around to see Ares standing out in front of the house, chatting up some Amazons. "Oh, no!" She jumped up from her hiding place in order to slam the door closed. Unfortunately, her muscles had grown stiff from her crouched position under the window. She tripped as the door opened and the buckets emptied their contents upon the unsuspecting victim. "Gods on Olympus!" Gabrielle cried out as two buckets of assorted fish parts rained down on her. The Queen looked down to find her wife sprawled across the wooden floor of their home, Tai right behind her. Gabrielle closed her eyes and breathed deeply. "You two--" "Mama…Mama!" Tai ran forward, a small piece of parchment in her hands. "Look what I made for you for Cupid's Day."
Tai looked up at Gabrielle with a sweetly innocent expression, glancing back at Xena with a 'you're on your own' look. "That is so cheating," Xena whispered. Gabrielle took another deep breath. "That's lovely, honey, thanks. Was this," she brushed a fish tail from her shoulder, "Xena's idea?" Tai looked back nervously at Xena's still prone figure. "I don't think warriors are s'pposed to tattle on other warriors," Tai whispered up at Gabrielle. "Xena?" Gabrielle said in a voice that sounded as though it had begun to fray at the edges. "Yes?" Xena couldn't think of one intelligent thing to say. "Are these pieces of…fish?" "Uhm…they're trout…your favorite." "On a plate, not with their guts draped all over me!" Xena winced at the younger woman's volume. "Gabrielle, I--" "No. I don't want to hear it right now." Gabrielle drew in another breath and fought down the urge to hit something. "I'm going to the bathing chamber and I want this cleaned up by the time I return." She walked out of the door without another word. Gabrielle's glare dared anyone to comment on her appearance as she walked down the steps of their hut. Ares' smile formed as soon as he saw Gabrielle coming his way. "You know--" He began with a chuckle. He froze at Gabrielle's next words. "If you say anything that could be classified as a smart-ass comment, so help me, you lose a testicle!"
"Um…I gotta go." Ares disappeared, leaving behind a trail of falling blue sparkles. Later, as Xena and Tai mopped up the mess they had created, Xena commented on the youngster's behavior. "Quick thinking to suck up like that." "What's 'suck up' mean, Xena?" "In this case, my friend, it means that you're a lot smarter than me." * * *
Xena and Tai knelt on the floor, each with a wet rag in hand. A candlemark had passed since Gabrielle left the hut, covered in fish unmentionables. "Tell me, little bit, is this the fun warrior stuff you were talking about?" Xena asked. Tai kept scrubbing the wooden floor that still smelled of fish guts. "Dis don't seem like fun warrior stuff at all." "Tell me about it." Xena paused and tilted her head as though she was testing the air with her senses. "Tai," she whispered, "Give me that soap." In a matter of heartbeats, Xena had pushed the thick cake of soap a couple of feet away from where they kneeled. Suddenly, the air crackled with a sort of hot energy and Ares's form materialized. As soon as the God became solid, his legs flew out from underneath him and he landed on his back, hitting the wooden floor hard enough to expel all the air in his lungs. Tai took that opportunity to do what she always did when Ares was on the ground playing with her. She charged him, screaming out her own particular version of a Xena battle cry, landing directly on the God of War's stomach.
Xena laughed as Ares pulled the cake of soap from underneath him and tossed it in the nearby bucket. "That'll teach you to knock first," Xena said. "I'm a God--ooph!" he exclaimed as Tai jumped up and down on this stomach. "Nobody else makes me knock." "Nobody else can kick your ass whenever she wants, either." "You can't kick my ass...whenever you want," he quickly added at the challenging gleam in Xena's eye. "Oh, yea? Who's lying on a wet floor, flat on their back, with a kid bouncing on top of them?" "Point taken. Whoa, kid. You're getting a little close to the equipment." Ares lifted Tai off his prone form. "Dat was funny, Ares. Do it again," Tai said. "Maybe next time, kiddo." He reached down to pat the blonde head. "So," he lowered his voice and looked around the room. "Is she back yet?" "I never thought I'd see the day. You acting like a wuss around Gabrielle." "You would be too if you knew what was good for you. Have you ever been around a woman just beginning to learn her God power? She may not have many of them, but until she learns how to control what she does have, I'll look out for my family jewels, thank you very much. When she says I'll lose a testicle, all she has to do is think about it too hard and poof! There it goes. " "Hhmm, could be worth seeing," Xena said in between her laughter. Gabrielle returned from her bath, wearing a much more congenial expression. "So, everything is all clean I see."
"Completely. Bri, I'm--" Gabrielle held up her hand. "It's okay. I should have known that you were getting ready to blow. You've been good way too long." Gabrielle winked and Xena knew that her wife had already forgiven her. One of the earmarks of this pregnancy had been that Gabrielle's temper resembled a summer gale. It swept through fast, with lots of strong wind, lightning, and thunder, but was gone before it ever achieved full force. Xena knew her wife. She also understood what it was like to be pregnant. It would only be another moon or two and Gabrielle's sweet and compassionate disposition would return. "Ares, I'm beat. Do you mind if we call it a day?" Gabrielle asked. Before Ares could answer, he sneezed. "Bless you," Xena and Gabrielle said in unison. "Wait a minute. Did you just sneeze?" Gabrielle asked. "I don't think I've even heard you sneeze before," Xena said. "That's because Gods don't sneeze," he replied. "Maybe it was just a fluke." Ares sneezed again. "Uh oh. I gotta go." "What's wrong?" Gabrielle asked. "It's the immortal virus. Man, I have to get back…now!" Ares face grew a look of concentration. He paused and looked at his outstretched hand. "Damn." He snapped his fingers, even said a quick incantation but all that happened was a little smoke and a small popping noise. "I'm still here." He said, looking down at his body. "Brilliant deduction," Xena said without sympathy.
"I mean I'm stuck here. All because I came back to check on you," he nodded his head at Gabrielle. "I knew this being nice gig was gonna bite me in the ass sooner or later." "Now, Ares, calm down," Gabrielle said. "What do you mean an immortal virus…is it catching? Is that why you can't transport yourself back to Olympus?" "The immortal virus only affects Gods. We heard last week that a couple of the Roman Gods were infected. Damn! I played cards with Mars. I bet that asshole passed it on to everybody on Olympus!" "So, you sneeze and lose your ability to transport?" Xena asked. "Doesn't sound too terrible." "I lose all my powers. I can't do a thing until I get better. I'm stuck here unless somebody comes for me." "All your powers?" Xena asked with an evil grin. "Xena, stop," Gabrielle ordered. "Don't worry, Ares. I'll call my father and he'll come get you. Do you feel okay?" "Yea, it doesn't do anything unless I--" Ares sneezed again. "What in Hades name?" Xena looked out the window into the Village. "Well, this is different." Joining Xena at the window, the three of them watched as snow fell from the sky. Ares sneezed and the snow stopped. He sneezed again and the entire compound filled with multicolored butterflies. "Everything is okay unless--" "Unless you sneeze," Xena finished. "Great," she said to Ares's embarrassed shrug. "This could be dangerous." "Nah, it's usually weird harmless stuff."
Gabrielle went into their bedroom and opened up the small wooden box that held her prized possessions. She put on the ring that Apollo had given her and spoke one word… father. In the past, Apollo had appeared almost immediately upon Gabrielle using the enchanted ring. "Father isn't answering." Gabrielle came out of the bedroom to address Xena and Ares. "You rang?" Aphrodite's voice arrived before she did. The Goddess wore her customary pink, low cut diaphanous gown. The only thing different was that she wore a cloth mask over her mouth and nose. "Aw, Dite, thank you, thank you. I thought I was gonna be stuck here as a mortal," Ares said. "Thanks a lot," Gabrielle responded. Ares shrugged and at least had the decency to look apologetic. "You know what I mean." "I'm afraid I do," Gabrielle said. "Aphrodite, where's my father and what is that thing on your face?" "Hey there, mama-to-be. Well, Apollo and the crowd have the same virus that this lug has, and boy, are they like pissed at you, Ares." "I only let Mars in to play cards!" "Yea, right! That wolf of his was all over the place. After everyone gets over this, we'll have to have Olympus fumigated. And do you want to know the worst part? This mask is ruining my make-up!" Xena and Gabrielle tried to hide their smiles. No matter how she had matured around mortals, Aphrodite would always be...well, Aphrodite. "So, you're the only God who doesn't cause puppies to fall from the sky when they sneeze?" Xena asked.
"Yep, I'm virus free and I plan on staying that way. That's why the mask, get it? Apollo gave me a yell when you tried to call on him," Aphrodite said to Gabrielle. "He figured little bro was stuck down here." "So how long does this virus last?" Gabrielle asked. "A few years," Aphrodite answered. "Years?" Xena and Gabrielle repeated in unison. "Well, not to you guys, silly. Years up on Olympus are just...what, two or three days down here?" she asked Ares. "More or less," he answered. "Gabrielle's been with Ares all day. Any chance she can get this virus?" Xena asked. "Don't think so, warrior-babe. I've never heard of anyone but a full God getting the immortal virus." "Excuse me, My Queen, but we have trouble." Ephiny had waited as long as she could, but felt that the situation warranted interrupting Gabrielle and her family. The Regent had never felt truly comfortable around Gabrielle's Godly relatives. She thought it best to steer as far away from the Gods as possible whenever they were in the Village. "Now what?" Gabrielle asked as Ares sneezed again. Suddenly, a herd of small gray burros materialized and wandered aimlessly throughout the compound. "Are you doing that?" Ephiny asked. She knew that Gabrielle had been practicing to control the powers she had inherited from her father. "Not me…him" Gabrielle jerked a thumb in Ares's direction.
"I don't want to know why, do I?" Ephiny stared at the burros as they passed by the group. "Not if you want to stay sane," Xena replied. "And the trouble is…?" Gabrielle encouraged Ephiny to continue. "Huh?" Ephiny looked confused. "The trouble you were going to tell me about?" "Oh…um, yea. Unfortunately, we have a rather touchy situation going down at the settlement near the Strymon." "Situation?" Gabrielle asked. "Marcasa, their new leader is starting shit, but it's the kind of shit that could end up causing a war." "We just gave them an extension to stay on that land until we can meet to sign a lease. What more does he want?" "He wants a lease immediately. The terms of the last contract stipulate that the Queen of the Amazons would negotiate in person no more than a fortnight after the lease ended." "Does this moron know that Gabrielle's pregnant and due by the next moon, that she's in no condition to travel?" Xena growled. "Frankly, I think that's part of his plan. At this point, he knows Gabrielle can't possibly travel the four or five days it would take to get there before the fortnight is up. If the timeline on the negotiation isn't kept, as written, the land will revert ownership to the lessee." "The bastard!" Xena said. "Actually, the people there aren't the type to want to go to war, but Marcasa is misguided enough to want to pull a fast one when he sees the
opportunity. "So you're telling me the Amazons lose that land if I can't get there in time?" Gabrielle asked. "I'm afraid so, but that's not the worst part of this little scenario. Andralen is taking these manipulations by Marcasa rather personally. He's threatening physical force if the settlement doesn't wait until the birth of your child, until you're able to travel. You know how Andralen feels about you." Gabrielle nodded, remembering Andralen. A centaur captain, he met Gabrielle the previous fall in the forest to the south of the Amazon village. He had his rear hoof ensnared in a hunter's metal trap. Luckily, Gabrielle had been visiting her favorite quiet spot in the woods and heard the centaur's angry bellows. After releasing the spring on the trap, she carefully explained about the healing power passed down to her from her father. In order to save Andralen's leg, she would have to expend some of this power, but first warned the creature that her ability was inconsistent much of the time. She had a hard time calling it up at will. Andralen took the chance and Gabrielle saved him from what would have been an almost certain amputation of the limb. Since that time, Andralen had become a devoted supporter of the young Amazon Queen. "I'm at a loss. How on earth can I possibly get there in time, even if I could spend five days on horseback?" Everyone looked around, trying to come up with an idea. Even Xena had a difficult time in dreaming up a way to get out of their situation. "Hellooo!" Aphrodite said. "Am I like invisible here?" The women went silent and looked at her in confusion. "Sweet Pea, I can get you there before you can say 'hot tub with the girls' and have you back in time for supper." They continued their silent stares for a few moments, but then they looked
at one another and all began to speak at once, effectively dismissing Aphrodite's suggestion. She stamped her foot in an attempt to get their attention. "Hey!" Aphrodite said. No," Xena said. "It does sound like an easy solution, though" Ephiny added. "No," Xena repeated, folding her arms across her chest. "Xena, I think--" Gabrielle began. "No. Gabrielle you're--" "Not going to deliver for another moon. Even if it does happen early it will still be another fortnight." "Xena, I'm kind of offended. You know I'll take care of our little mom-to-be," Aphrodite was quick to add. "I know you mean well, Aphrodite, but--" "Xena, I don't think we have any choice. Aphrodite, will it be safe for the baby?" "Sure! She'll be in the safe hands of Auntie Aphrodite." "Oh, that just fills me with confidence," Xena said. "All right," Xena held her hands up in mock surrender, not looking at all thrilled with the idea, but slightly intimidated by her wife's gaze. "But, I want Aphrodite to zap you into the centaur village first and make sure Andralen sends a unit with you to the settlement. I want you protected. Actually, I think it would be better if I--" "Xe, someone needs to stay home with the girls." "We're surrounded by Amazons. They live to baby sit."
"Sweetheart, I'll only be a few candlemarks." Xena realized that she had gone into her over protective mode. She had to let Gabrielle rule her people, no matter how personally difficult that became. She smiled and reached over to kiss Gabrielle's forehead. Gabrielle placed one hand on Xena's arm. "Don't worry so much, okay?" "What, just when I'm getting so good at it?" "Okay, now that it's all settled how about giving me a lift home first. Eh, sis?" Ares sneezed again and a long line of multicolored rabbits slowly hopped past the group. "Right. Off you go!" Aphrodite sent Ares on his way with a wave of her hand. "Okay, just say the word, Sweet Pea, and we're outta here." "Let me change into something more formal first," Gabrielle said. * * *
"Tell Tai that I had to leave in a hurry…don't let her eat too many snacks before dinner…do you remember how Emery's milk goes in the container to feed her?" Gabrielle rattled off a string of requests as she dressed. "Bri, You'll be back for dinner. I think I can manage until then," Xena answered. "I know, I'm being silly, aren't I?" "Pretty much, but I'm used to it." "Very funny, warrior. Gods, I'm getting nervous already." "You'll have everything under control in no time, I know it. Just come back to
me quickly, my heart. You know I haven't had to spend a Cupid's Day apart from you in all the time we've known each other." "Xe, it's days away," Gabrielle answered with a smile. "But, I promise you, no matter what, we'll celebrate Cupid's Day together." "With my gift?" Gabrielle suddenly remembered why she had wanted to talk with Ephiny earlier that day. She knew that Xena had been casually trying to remain inconspicuous, while searching their home high and low for any signs of hidden gifts. The Queen had requested that Ephiny hide the custom-made saddle Gabrielle had commissioned for her wife. "With your present," Gabrielle replied. "It's a deal then." They kissed and held to one another as though it would be a much longer separation. Xena wanted one more kiss, but there wasn't time before Gabrielle rushed through the door. Gabrielle and Ephiny discussed the details of the contract one last time. After a few more hasty farewells, Gabrielle gave one last wave, and blew a kiss in Xena's direction before her figure shimmered into nothingness beside Aphrodite. * * *
"Your Highness, we are most honored that you have come in person." An elderly man took Gabrielle's hand and gave it a light squeeze. "I apologize for my son's behavior in this matter. Marcasa is young and has yet to gain the maturity that leadership demands. You are an excellent example for him." The old man glared at the young man who stood beside
him. "I'm happy that we could come to an understanding and that this didn't have to escalate into anything violent," Gabrielle replied. She watched as Marcasa looked away from her, unable to make eye contact. His cheeks had turned red with shame. She understood that his father had taught him better, but the young man had given into the attractive nature of power. "I really must be going, now. I have someone waiting." Gabrielle looked over to where Aphrodite stood, surrounded by a group of men and Centaurs. "We've never seen any of the Gods in their mortal shapes before," the old man's words explained and seemed to apologize for the behavior of the men of the village. "You get used to it after a while," she replied with a smile. "Aphrodite? Ready?" "I'm always ready." She winked at the men. "Say goodbye, Aphrodite," Gabrielle pulled the Goddess away from the group. "Spoilsport. Well, toodles, guys. See ya 'round the temple." Aphrodite took hold of Gabrielle's hand, and the Goddess snapped her fingers together. A pale pink powder shimmered as it fell to the ground where the two women had been standing only a heartbeat earlier. "Wow, that was quicker than last time," Gabrielle said, as she felt solid ground beneath her feet. She looked around, unable to understand why they were standing on the side of a road in an area she couldn't recognize. "Aphrodite, where are we?"
Before Gabrielle even had the words out of her mouth, Aphrodite threw back her head and sneezed. Suddenly, brightly colored tulips popped up from the ground for as far as they could see down the road. "Uh oh," Aphrodite said in reply. * * *
"Oh, no," Gabrielle said. Her face expressed the shock that she felt. "Don't even tell me that you have it, too." "Okay." Silence hung heavy in the air. "Well?" Gabrielle cried out. "You said not to tell you!" Aphrodite replied. She sneezed again and all of the green grass around them turned a bright blue. "I don't believe this is happening. Where are we?" "Hey, I'm just as surprised as you are. This wasn't exactly how I planned this. Don't you have any transport powers at all?" Aphrodite asked. "Even if I could, which I can't, I'd be afraid that we'd end up in a dozen pieces. You know how erratic this stuff is for me." "Well, this bites," Aphrodite said. "I guess we'll just have to start walking," Gabrielle said. "Exqueeze me?" Aphrodite stopped to stare at Gabrielle. "You want me to walk?" "It's either that or camp out for a few days until your powers return."
"That sounds fine." "Of course, we have no food, no water, and no place to sleep," Gabrielle said. "Oh, guess we can't let you and the bambino go without food." "There's another really good reason why we have to get home," Gabrielle added. "Why?" "My water just broke." "You can break water?" Aphrodite asked. "What does that mean?" "It means I'm having my baby." "Oh no you don't." Aphrodite placed her hands on her hips. "You cross your legs and don't let that little bugger out." "It's not quite that easy," Gabrielle replied, clutching her abdomen. The pain seemed to roll through her in slow, fluttering waves. It felt nothing like the first time she had given birth to this youngster. "Brianna, stay!" Aphrodite ordered as she pointed to Gabrielle's stomach. Gabrielle laughed, in spite of the seriousness of their situation. "Aphrodite, you're losing it." "Well, this mortal gig can get old in a hurry. What are we going to do?" "I don't know, but the first thing we need to do is get off the side of the road." Aphrodite sneezed and a line of wooden chairs inched their way down the road."
"I take that back. The first thing we need to do is stop you from sneezing. The second is to find some shelter. I'm going to need your help in walking, though." "Oh, okay. Um…what do I do?" Aphrodite looked as though she was afraid to touch Gabrielle. "Just let me lean on you a bit. Okay?" They started walking, still unsure which direction would lead them home. They were in the middle of nowhere and nothing looked the slightest bit familiar to Gabrielle. After a while, they had worked up a sweat for their efforts. Well, Gabrielle had worked up a sweat. Aphrodite attempted to assist Gabrielle in between fits of sneezing. They had seen the sky turn magenta, bunnies grow wings, but the strangest, Gabrielle had to admit, were the fish that flew by. Seeing the fish caused Gabrielle to think that it was only earlier that morning when Xena had doused her with fish guts, a practical joke meant for Ares. The thought of Xena, and the Cupid's Day gift from little Tai, made Gabrielle's eyes fill with tears. She was trying to be brave, but their present situation, coupled with the pain in her lower belly was simply too much for her. "Geez, how many loaves of nut bread have you been eating lately?" Aphrodite asked. "Hey, I'm sorry, it was just a joke." Aphrodite was quick to apologize when she saw the tears in Gabrielle's eyes. "I'm just…Aphrodite, I don't know how much further I can go." "We need to find you a spot to rest for a while. How about over there?" "I don't think we should stop," Gabrielle responded and then grimaced from another contraction. "Sweet Pea, I don't know what to tell ya, but I have no idea where we are and you really look like--"
"No! We have to keep going." "Why are you being such a stubborn half Goddess?" Aphrodite said in exasperation. "Because I'm having a baby and it's just you and me in the middle of nowhere! Because the last time--" A strangled sob halted the remainder of Gabrielle's sentence, but she didn't have to finish for Aphrodite to understand. The Goddess knew that Gabrielle had been thinking of the last time she had given birth to this same baby, when Hera had stolen the child's life force in an act of revenge. The pain and suffering experienced by Gabrielle and Xena had set all of Olympus against Hera. "We can do this, Gabrielle. Come on." Gabrielle offered a weak smile, rather impressed that Aphrodite could take charge of the situation. The feeling was short-lived, however. "Just quit saying you're going to have that baby. That is just way too grody to even think about." * * *
""I knew it, I just knew it!" Xena shouted. "And you just couldn't wait to send her out there…with Aphrodite of all people." "They're not actually that late," Ephiny responded. She was just as concerned, but couldn't explain to Xena what she had been feeling. "They've been gone for an entire day! Yesterday she said it would be a few candlemarks. She's with a Goddess. It isn't like they had to stop for the night."
Ephiny had been trying to display an outward calmness in hopes that it would affect Xena. So far, that hadn't worked at all. Xena took everything that anyone said to her as patronizing. The warrior was right about one thing. They couldn't remain passive. They had to take some sort of action. "Look, Xena--" "So help me, Ephiny, if you say you're sending another message to Andralen with those damn birds I'm going to wring your neck. Right after, I'm going to do the same to those freaking pigeons!" "Okay, okay, no more messages with the birds." Ephiny clearly understood Xena's reasons for worry, but the Regent didn't know quite how to explain that she had a certain feeling about Gabrielle. She didn't know how to explain it herself, but although Gabrielle had been missing for nearly a full pass of the sun, Ephiny simply knew her Queen wasn't in harm's way. She had no idea how to convey that very abstract feeling to a very worried Xena. Ephiny doubted it would have done any good anyway. "I'm open for suggestions, Xena," Ephiny continued. "Andralen said that when Gabrielle and Aphrodite left the settlement, they were both fine. The only thing I can think to do is have a search party set off for the settlement and hope we run into them along the way. Maybe Aphrodite did get that virus they were talking about and they had to walk the rest of the way." "I hope you're right, and yea, that's about all we can do right now," Xena answered, taking some heart from Ephiny's confident answer. "Ep, get a search party together. I want Sika along. She's the best tracker we have," Ephiny ordered. Eponin didn't even answer. She simply rushed off to make the arrangements. Xena pursed her lips and whistled. Moments later Argo stood waiting
beside her mistress. Xena jumped up and landed softly upon the animal's bare back. "The more people, the slower we go. I'm taking Argo and heading out now. Catch up when you can. I'll take the main road. If anything did happen, Gabrielle would be sure to stay along that route." Xena's actions didn't surprise Ephiny. It was quite evident that Xena was dangerously close to losing what shreds of patience now held her together. It wasn't simply about Gabrielle, although that would have been nothing new for Xena. The overprotective behavior had become second nature for Xena ever since their baby's, life force had been returned to them. "Damn, I forgot about the girls. Tai's gonna freak," Xena turned around to address Ephiny just as Eponin rejoined them, leading two horses. The warrior was afraid Tai would be frightened if both Gabrielle and herself turned up missing. "I'll take care of it. Tai loves Sartori. I'll have the kids stay with them and explain to Tai. Go one. We'll catch up as we can." "Thanks, Eph!" Xena called back, leaving the Amazons choking on a cloud of dust. "How long do you think it will take her to get there," Eponin asked as she tossed a saddle on her mare's back. "I figure it takes almost five days to get to the settlement on horseback at an easy pace. The way she's moving, it won't take more than 2 days tops." "What do think really happened to the Queen?" Sika asked Ephiny as she joined the group. "Not sure, but I have a feeling. I know, you'll think I'm nuts, but it's like…like-" "A gut feeling." Sartori joined them, finishing Ephiny's sentence.
"Exactly. Do you feel it, too?" "Yes, but I can't explain why, which I find odd in itself. Adia has the same feeling so I can only hope that our mutual intuition is correct," Sartori answered. Ephiny opened her mouth to speak, but Sartori raised a hand to stop her. "Eponin already told me that Xena left. I'm on my way to collect Tai and Emery right now. I'll let Tai know that there's nothing to worry about." "Sartori, you're a life saver. Everyone ready?" Ephiny looked around as the group on horseback nodded their heads. Without another word, they rode from the village. Sartori smiled when she saw her mate walking toward her. The tall healer carried Xena and Gabrielle's additions to their family, one in each arm. Adia carefully deposited baby Emery into Sartori's arms. "Can I ride on your shoulders again, Adia? Can I?" "May I," Sartori added. "You want to, too?" Tai looked up at Sartori. Adia laughed and kissed her wife on the cheek. "Does she remind you of her mom?" Adia scooped up the youngster and perched her upon her shoulders. "Wow, I can see everything from here," the small girl said. "Tai, Xena had to go get Gabrielle, but I think they'll both be back soon." "'Kay. Mama's okay…juss late." Sartori and Adia exchanged stunned glances. "How do you know that Gabrielle is okay?" Sartori asked. Tai shrugged. "Juss know."
"Well, we all feel it, I guess," Sartori said to Adia. "Hope we're all right," Adia replied. "Although, I think by now we should be used to the fact that our Queen does have a knack for finding trouble." Sartori smiled at the statement. "I think Gabrielle would argue that trouble seems to find her." "Either way, I feel rather sorry for any trouble that's bothering Gabrielle right about now." "Indeed," Sartori agreed. "They have evidently never dealt with the Queen's Champion." "Yep. If they only knew that in another day or so old tall, dark, and pissed off will be hot on their trail, they'd run for the hills," Adia said with a chuckle. * * *
Aphrodite led Gabrielle off the road and up a small grassy hill. The young Queen didn't say a word. She allowed her aunt to lead her into a rather sizable wooden feeding stall. Gabrielle recognized the enclosure from her days in the farmland of Potidaea. Farmers with a great deal of land filled the buildings with hay, leaving them open to allow their stock to feed in the winter. Gabrielle gave a tired sigh followed by a grunt of pain as she settled her back against a pile of bundled hay. A jumble of thoughts and fears raced past her mind's eye. She didn't want to give in to her fear, but the contractions had become more frequent. The pain grew a little stronger with each one, no longer the light flutters that had first tickled her belly. Another contraction took hold of her small body and Gabrielle felt the familiar pressure that indicated that Brianna had no intention of waiting until her due day.
"Oh, Gods!" Gabrielle couldn't keep from crying out. "Okay, like I don't know what to do. This cannot be happening!" Aphrodite paced back and forth as agitated as Gabrielle had ever seen her. Gabrielle's cries came more frequently. She silently consoled herself that while the pain was enough to take her breath away, it felt distinctly different from her last experience at giving birth. Then, something had felt wrong from the onset. The agony had gone on for what seemed like candlemarks. Now, it was happening fast…almost too fast. Aphrodite continued to look around and pace the small building. She looked more terrified than Gabrielle. "Okay, you have got to stop this whole thing. I mean it. Quit fooling around, Gabrielle!" "Aphrodite--" Gabrielle bit her lip in order to swallow the agony of another fierce contraction. The Goddess went pale as she stood there, wringing her hands and looking as though she might faint at any moment. "No, no, no. This can't be happening. I can't do this, Gabrielle. I can't do this at all. I'll find someone. That's it. There must be someone around to--" "Aphrodite!" Aphrodite froze at the sound of Gabrielle's voice. "Aphrodite," Gabrielle said from between clenched teeth and panting breaths. "Whether you like it or not," she sucked in what appeared to be a painful breath. "I…am…having…this…baby!" Gabrielle nearly shrieked. "And, I'm having it right now. I can't do it alone, though. Please, Aphrodite…I'm so afraid." Aphrodite's expression changed. Her brow furrowed together and she
looked down at Gabrielle. Her face grew serious and she very nearly looked as though she was staring directly through Gabrielle. Aphrodite's physical features changed as Gabrielle looked on. The Queen had never had the opportunity to see Aphrodite in any light other than as the frivolous Goddess of Love. Most people, even Aphrodite's own family, had never thought of her as anything but shallow and empty-headed. Only those who caught the Goddess during one of those rare personal moments when she let her guard down would see her as Gabrielle did just then. "All right, then. Let's get to work," Aphrodite moved away from Gabrielle, scurrying around the building and gathering up a number of cloth sacks that looked to be cleaner than the rest. She scooped up two other items near the back of the stall. "Aphrodite?" Gabrielle's frightened voice called out. "I'm right here, Sweet Pea." She rushed back to Gabrielle and knelt beside the young woman. "What are you doing?" Gabrielle asked. Aphrodite smiled confidently as the young woman. "Getting ready to introduce your baby girl to the world." Gabrielle reached out and Aphrodite took her hand. The Goddess's grasp was deceptively strong, surprising Gabrielle with a strong sense of reassurance. "You may have to help me a bit," Aphrodite said. "It's been a long time since I had Cupid. Talk about labor pains. Try giving birth to a kid with wings, then we'll talk." Gabrielle found herself smiling in spite of what she was experiencing. "Like, that's a day I'll never forget. Wanna hear about it?" Gabrielle nodded.
"Atta girl. Well, it happened like this…" * * *
"A few more seasons and she's gonna knock 'em dead," Aphrodite said as she handed the small crying bundle to Gabrielle. "How can something so tiny eat so much?" "Well, she is my child, after all. Oh, Aphrodite she's so beautiful," Gabrielle replied as she looked down at the baby pressed against her chest. "I didn't know she would be so beautiful." "Did you try to project yourself to Xena?" Aphrodite asked. "I tried, but she keeps her mind so closed. Besides, I'm not even sure yet if I'm doing it right. I tried to send a sort of mental picture to the Amazon village. I figure someone will tune in to it." Tears fell from Gabrielle's eyes when she looked down at Brianna, but she had never been happier. All she could think of was how much she wished Xena had been there to share in the overwhelming emotions. After their last experience under Hera's curse, Gabrielle had so wanted Xena to be at her side during the birth. Actually, she hadn't told anyone, even Xena, exactly how frightened she felt, as her due date grew closer. Gabrielle had been certain that no one but Xena would be able to help her get past her fear. Then she thought of Aphrodite. Lately, Gabrielle had been feeling more and more comfortable around the Olympian Gods. After all, Ares had been seeing her every day as part of her instruction on the magical arts and her father had even been a frequent guest at their dinner table. Gabrielle had always had a soft spot for Aphrodite. She felt that the Goddess had always meant well, even if her plans did sometimes go astray. As familiar as the Gods had become to
her, Gabrielle still hadn't felt as though these people were family. Seeing the change that had come over Aphrodite, just when Gabrielle needed help the most, had altered her perception of the Goddess, along with the idea that these immortals were a part of her or she with them. During Brianna's birth, Aphrodite had become a source of strength that Gabrielle had never anticipated. The Goddess had not only taken complete control of the situation, but, with her own strong and compassionate attitude, Aphrodite had instilled a feeling of confidence within Gabrielle. "I don't know what I would have done without you," Gabrielle said. "Hey, just tryin' to do my part as Auntie Aphrodite." "Well, I'll never forget how you held it all together. You sort of…well, to be honest you surprised me." "Yea, well, between me and you, I kind of surprised myself, too. No one's ever…you know, depended on me before, needed me." "I needed you, Aphrodite, and you came through for me." The Goddess smiled and Gabrielle wondered if it was possible for Gods to blush. "Just don't get used to it," Aphrodite teased. "Stepping in to save the day is so not my gig, ya know." Gabrielle chuckled. "I think it just might be. Maybe more than you realize." "Right!" Aphrodite answered before laughing. "You and I both know I'm not cut out for the whole Queen's Champion thing. I think I'll leave that for--" "Me." Both women turned toward the door in order to see who had finished Aphrodite's sentence. Gabrielle already knew that voice. The low, female alto was unmistakable to Gabrielle's ears. Xena looked as though she hadn't slept in days, her hair was wind blown from the wild ride she'd just
had. "Xena!" Gabrielle exclaimed and the tears returned. Xena wasted no time in rushing to kneel beside her mate. "Bri, you had me so worried. I--" She wrapped her arms around Gabrielle, pulling back at the last moment in surprise. Sapphire eyes went wide at the sight of the now sleeping bundle lying against Gabrielle's chest. "Gabrielle." It was the only thing that Xena could think of to say. She just stared down at the baby. Brianna, somehow sensing that it was her turn to make an appearance, stretched and yawned. She opened her eyes and made a gurgling sound, falling back asleep instantly. "By the Gods! She's beautiful," Xena said at last. "My heart, I'm so sorry you had to go through this alone." Xena carefully slipped her arms around Gabrielle and kissed her gently. Gabrielle was rather glad that she wasn't the only one crying as she watched Xena stroke the infant's head, tears falling slowly from those same sapphire eyes. "I wasn't alone, Xe. I was with my aunt." Xena looked on as Gabrielle and Aphrodite exchanged a glance. They smiled in such a way that Xena knew there was much more to the story. It was obvious that something special had passed between the two women. She had no idea how Aphrodite had come through for Gabrielle, but she shouldn't have been too surprised. After all, only a few days ago she had told Tai that when we needed it the most, the greatest heart and strength could come from the most unlikely of people. "Thanks, Aphrodite," Xena said. "All part of the service." "You two missed your mark a little in trying to get home, though, didn't you?"
"Unfortunately, Aphrodite came down with--" Aphrodite sneezed and bubbles began to float down from the sky. Each pink, translucent bubble had a furry pink teddy bear inside with a red heart on his belly. "I see," Xena replied with a chuckle. "Brianna, look what your Auntie Aphrodite made for your birthday." She burst one of the bubbles and grabbed the bear out of mid air. The acknowledgement wasn't lost on Aphrodite. Having Gabrielle accept her was one thing, but having the hard sell warrior claim her as family touched the Goddess's heart. "You okay?" Xena asked. "Yea," Aphrodite shook her head and moved toward the large door. "I think I just got something in my eye. Guess I'll give you guys a few minutes to… you know." She practically ran from the enclosure. "For being the Goddess of Love, I don't think Aphrodite handles real affection too well," Gabrielle said. "Hey, happy Cupid's Day," Xena said before she leaned over and kissed Gabrielle's forehead. "Has that much time gone by?" Gabrielle appeared surprised. She grinned up at Xena. "I'll bet you tore the house apart looking for your gift. Didn't you?" Xena tried not to look as guilty as she suddenly felt. "Not too much," she mumbled. Gabrielle developed a sort of mischievous gleam in her eye. "Well, here." She carefully transferred Brianna to Xena's arms. The child looked even smaller held safely within the warrior's strong embrace. Gabrielle realized that even when she was quite old and gray, she would always remember
that image, of Xena holding their newborn child, tears filling the warrior's eyes. "She'll have to do for now. Happy Cupid's Day," Gabrielle responded, reaching up to kiss Xena's wet cheek. "She's just what I wanted," Xena replied as her voice broke from emotion. "She's the perfect gift." THE END
