Miller's Tale by G.A. Hauser
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Copyright ©2007 by G.A. Hauser
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Miller's Tale by G.A. Hauser
Phaze www.phaze.com
Copyright ©2007 by G.A. Hauser
NOTICE: This eBook is licensed to the original purchaser only. Duplication or distribution to any person via email, floppy disk, network, print out, or any other means is a violation of International copyright law and subjects the violator to severe fines and/or imprisonment. This notice overrides the Adobe Reader permissions which are erroneous. This eBook cannot be legally lent or given to others. This eBook is displayed using 100% recycled electrons.
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Miller's Tale by G.A. Hauser
Miller's Tale A novel of erotic suspense by G.A. Hauser Phaze 6470A Glenway Avenue, #109 Cincinnati, OH 45211-5222 This is a work of fiction. Names, places, characters and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, organizations, events or locales is entirely coincidental. eBook ISBN 1-59426-753-7 Miller's Tale © 2007 by G.A Hauser All rights reserved under the International and PanAmerican Copyright Conventions. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher. Cover art © 2007 by Debi Lewis Edited by Kent Miller Phaze is an imprint of Mundania Press, LLC. www.Phaze.com
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Chapter One "459 in progress." "Roger, 459, Code 3." Officer Steve Miller hit his lights and sirens, immediately feeling his heart and adrenaline pumping as he raced to what appeared to be a burglary in progress. Checking his location, he shut off the wailing noise and picked up his radio. "9 Lincoln 59, arriving, standing by." The dispatcher repeated his words over the air. Waiting until the second one-man unit arrived, Steve checked the clock. The call came out at 22:46, it was now 22:59. "For units responding to the 459 in progress, we have an update ... it appears there are no suspects on the scene, repeat, no suspects on the scene." "Roger." Steve clicked off the mike and headed directly to the location. When they arrived, Steve spotted a woman standing at her door waving to them. He parked and shut off the engine, then climbed out of the car to meet her. Before he did, Brian pulled up behind him. He stopped, walking back to Brian's patrol car. "I've got it. You go ahead and clear." "You sure?" "Yeah." Brian looked up at the pretty blonde standing at the open doorway. "Nice one, Miller." 4
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Twisting over his shoulder, Steve noticed she was attractive and petite. "I told you I can handle it," he grinned, looking back at Brian. "Right. See ya on the next one." Brian smiled. Watching Brian's patrol car speed away, Steve cleared his throat, ran his hand through his hair and headed up the long curved walkway to the young woman. "You all right?" Steve asked. "Yeah, just a little frightened ... come in." She backed up and allowed him to enter. He looked around the interior, and heard someone talking on the phone in the other room. Minimalist in design, the décor was crisp and clean—black, white, and cherry red, with a Mondrian style set of acrylic paintings over the leather couch. "We had the alarm set, and when it went off we got scared out of our wits!" "So, did they get in?" "Almost. Come here." She led the way through the kitchen to a window. Steve noticed a tall, slender African American woman standing with the phone in her hand. Her dark hair was pinned up on her head and her nightgown was sheer and silky. He had to force himself to not ogle her overtly. "He's here now. Yes, thank you." She hung up and addressed him. "That was your dispatcher. She wanted to keep me on the line until you showed up." "Yeah, they do that." He smiled at her. 5
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"Over here." The blonde waved at him. "See? The creep got the whole screen off." Steve leaned over her shoulder. "Did you touch anything yet?" "I haven't. Sonja, did you?" "I didn't touch anything, Chelsea," Sonja said, holding her hands up. "After I get your information, I'll see if I can get any prints, if that's okay." "Yes! Get the creep!" Chelsea shivered and rubbed her arms to warm them. Sonja laughed at her roommate. "Yeah, get him so I can defend him and get him off!" "Oh, shut up!" Chelsea laughed. "Ah, okay, who wants to give me their name first?" Steve took his pen and pad out of his pocket. "I will. Chelsea Saunders." "Date of birth and middle initial?" "Uh ... you really need that?" Steve glanced back at Sonja and smiled, then said to Chelsea, "I'm not being nosy, I just need it for the report." "Oh, give the man your damn birthday!" Sonja exhaled tiredly. Chelsea rattled it off and Steve wrote it down efficiently. "You're only twenty-eight. I don't think that qualifies you as over the hill yet." "Whatever!" Moving to her attractive roommate, Steve used a more personal tone. "Sonja M. Knight?" 6
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"Yes! How did you know that?" "You were the complainant on the call. It was on my computer. I wish I could say I had ESP." "Oh. Now you want my date of birth, I suppose." "I do." Steve imagined doing very naughty things to her. Just the sight of her long slender legs exposed from her dressing gown was enough to put him into heat. He imagined caressing her smooth cheek, licking those full lips, and burrowing his face into her cleavage. She gave it to him and he slid his pad into his pocket. Trying to click back into his official mode, he said, "So, you heard the alarm go off, raced here to see what was going on and then what?" Chelsea ran her hand back through her hair and said, "I don't know. That's it." "Did you see anyone?" "No. I heard some noises, but when I looked out the window it was too dark to see anything." "So, no suspect description?" "No." He turned to Sonja, who appeared lost in a daydream. "Same for you?" "Hmm? Oh, I didn't even hear anything. He must have been long gone when I got there. The alarm was so loud it made my ears ring!" Giving her an affectionate glance, he had a tremendous urge to comfort her, hold her in his arms. "Uh ... okay, let me see if I can get anything from outside. I'll be right back." **** 7
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They walked him to the door and watched him open the trunk of the patrol car. "You think he's cute?" Chelsea whispered. "Cute? Do I think he's cute?" Sonja laughed at her. "Yeah ... he's so big and brawny. And those blue eyes ... man, what is it about cops?" "Don't get me started about cops, girl!" Sonja coughed. "Don't you go falling in love with no LAPD cop!" "How old do you think he is?" "Young! He's a mere puppy! You stay away from him!" "Oh, come on, he can't be that young." They leaned on each other at the open door as he returned to the house with a small black plastic box. As he passed by on the lawn he pointed to the backyard. "I'll check out his point of entry. Okay? I'll be right back." They nodded and he disappeared behind the house. Chelsea shut the screen door and looked back at Sonja. "I'm exhausted. I hope I can get back to sleep after this." "I know. We both have court in the morning." She yawned and covered it with her hand, then said, "Look, the alarm did its job. It woke us up before some nut case got in the house. So, I don't think you need to worry." "Right." They moved through the house and back into the kitchen to see what he was doing. ****
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Officer Miller was shining a flashlight on the window sill and dusting the metal frame of the screen. When he noticed them both standing inside watching him he said, "Nothing here. Sorry." "Never mind," Chelsea sighed. Steve packed up his kit and walked around to the front again. He set the box down on the front stoop and used a disinfectant wipe to clean the black powder from his fingers. "Is that it?" Chelsea asked, leaning on the door frame watching him. "I think so. Can you get that window locked again?" "Oh! I didn't think of that." She hurried back to the kitchen. While she was gone, Steve whispered to Sonja, "So, you're a criminal lawyer?" "Damn, how did you get so smart?" "I'm just very observant. You said you'd just end up defending him and getting him off." He wanted to kiss those gorgeous lips of hers so badly, he ached. "Oh, I did, didn't I?" She smiled. "I guess that makes us mortal enemies." Loving the look in her eye, Steve replied seductively, "Not necessarily." Blinking her eyes in surprise, Sonja blushed uncontrollably and turned away. "I can't!" came a shout from the kitchen. "May as well come on in again." Sonja waved him inside. He winked at her and headed to the sound of Chelsea's fretting voice. 9
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"It won't shut! He's bent it or something!" "Let me have a look." Steve said. Steve watched Chelsea back up and bite at her nail nervously as Sonja stood behind her. Out of the corner of Steve's eye he noticed when Chelsea glimpsed back at Sonja and caught her staring at him Chelsea whacked her arm playfully and shook her head. "There. I got it sealed again but I do suggest you call your alarm company and make sure the contacts are working." When he turned around he caught some kind of silent communication happening behind him. Chelsea met his eyes quickly and said, "Yes! We will do that!" He stared at one set of eyes and then the other curiously, then gave up and found one of his business cards. He clicked his mike and asked the dispatcher for the case number. When she responded he wrote it down on the card and acknowledged he had received it. "How do you hear with that thing crackling in your ear all night?" Sonja asked, her arms crossed over her chest. "You get used to it." He handed her the business card. "I couldn't understand a thing she said." Chelsea tried to look at the card her roommate was handed. "Anything else I can do before I go?" Steve gave Sonja a very inviting smile. A surprised look appeared on her face. "Uh, no, Officer Miller," Chelsea read his name from his name tag which was on his chest. "I think you've done enough for two damsels in distress." 10
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Choking at the comment, Sonja mumbled under her breath, "Yeah, right. Two damsels." Steve walked to their front door and picked up his fingerprint kit from the steps. He looked over his shoulder and made eye contact with Sonja, saying, "You never know, I may see you in court." "You may!" she answered, "and if it's on a case, you'll lose!" Loving her confidence and fire he grinned. "I wouldn't mind getting beaten by you." Chelsea's eyes opened in surprise. "Good night, Officer Miller." Sonja smiled at him. "Good night, ladies." **** "Bye!" Chelsea waved and they both watched as he walked back to his patrol car. When he drove off, Chelsea closed and locked the door, staring at Sonja. "What?" she asked. "You flirt!" "Me? I didn't do a thing to flirt with that man!" She turned her back on her and started shutting the lights. "You did, too!" "Go to bed, Chel, and get some rest." Setting the alarm again, Chelsea hurried up the stairs behind her. **** 11
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Standing at his locker at the end of shift, removing the uniform and heavy gun-belt and vest, Steve felt exhausted and couldn't wait to get horizontal. "So?" Brian opened the locker behind him. "You make a date with the hot blonde?" Smiling to himself, Steve replied, "Naaa..." "She turn you down?" Brian laughed. "I didn't ask her." "Why? Was her boyfriend inside?" "No. She had a female roommate." "Oh ... one of those..." "No, ya, moron! She's not 'one of those'! Grow the fuck up." "Oh, fuck you. You're just pissed off because you don't have the gonads to ask a pretty woman out. Man! Use the uniform! Chicks go mad for it. And you're not too disgustingly ugly—you can get away with it!" Tilting to look at Brian from over his shoulder as he buttoned his civilian shirt, Steve said, "Too bad you are disgustingly ugly. That's why you're trying to live vicariously through me!" "Shut the hell up!" Brian laughed, shoving him. Steve finished getting dressed and waved to him and a few of the other men who were getting off shift. **** "Bri," Gary whispered to him, "What's the rookie done now?" 12
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"Nothing. He just had an opportunity to make it with some hot chick on a call and he didn't even ask her out!" "Maybe he's gay," Gary snickered. "Don't even joke about it!" Brian curled his lip in revulsion. "He's not! Don't be a fucking idiot." Gary tucked in his shirt and found his car keys. "Christ, you never know with these newbies they hire. Shit—gay-bi-transsexuals! They get every kind in here now. Not like it used to be, ya know." Gary looked to where he was nodding and found a black officer taking off his kit. Sighing in irritation, Gary just walked away. **** Shutting off his truck, Steve looked around the silent parking area of his condominium for anything suspicious. Even though it had an electric gate at the entrance of the garage, sometimes people managed to break in. He climbed out, grabbed his keys, and then chirped the alarm on his rig, scuffing tiredly to the elevator. In the wee hours of the morning the halls were vacant and hollow. Seeing his unit number on the door he opened it, deactivating the alarm, locking it up behind him. Steve tossed his keys and waist pack with his handgun on the counter in the kitchen. Opening the refrigerator, he removed a beer and then some leftover pasta. Sticking the pasta into the microwave and the beer in his mouth, he leaned back on the table, sucking it down trying to unwind. 13
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Remembering something, he dug through his tight jeans pocket and removed a piece of scrap paper from his pad. Sonja M. Knight 7/8/77. "Twenty-nine," he mumbled, "...an older woman ... Christ, you are fantastic." He began to spin a fantasy in his head about meeting her, seducing her, and making hot passionate love with her. "Sonja, Sonja, Sonja, oooh, my ... you are one hot lady." A vision of lying between her spread legs flashed over his mind. Just the thought of penetrating her made him crazy. The bell on the microwave went off. He set the bottle down and opened it up, stirred the macaroni in the little plastic Tupperware container, then he started eating. When he had finished it, he set the plastic in the sink and drank the rest of the beer, then he retired to bed. Once he was washed up and naked, he crawled under the sheets and grumbled, "This fricken' shift work is killing me," then closed his eyes.
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Chapter Two A week later, bleary-eyed and sitting with a dozen other exhausted cops in the county court house, Steve rubbed his face and ran his hand back through his hair, trying to appear alert. Stifling a yawn, he heard the judge coming in and stood as court came in session. Once the judge sat, everyone dropped back down to their seats. Brian sat down next to him heavily. "Thanks, Miller." Steve looked at him tiredly. "This is your damn case I'm here for. I should have just blanked the subpoena. I didn't do nuthin'." "You never do anything. I have no idea why you even bother." "Shut up." One of the prosecutors leaned over the crowd with a list, reading out names. Steve nodded when his was called, and then the few who hadn't shown up had their names repeated in vain. A monotonous trail of people stood before the judge as she doled out courtrooms and warrants for arrest for suspects who, predictably, didn't show up. Just about to nod off in his chair in the stuffy crowded room, Steve jumped as the judge hit her gavel trying to get the murmuring in the room to subside so she could hear. Opening his eyes and rubbing his face again, Steve focused on a tiny form in a snug fitting black skirt and blazer. 15
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Her long chocolate brown hair flowed down her back and her heels were narrow and high. He sat up at attention and tried to figure out which case she had been handling. "...damn, I forgot my fucking pen ... Miller, can I borrow— " "Shhh! Hang on!" He tilted over his lap to try and hear over the low din. Brian asked, "Is it your case?" "If you keep talking, I'll never find out!" "...the defense is ready, thank you, Your Honor." "...prosecution is ready, Your Honor." "Courtroom Four at nine AM." "Thank you, Your Honor." Sonja folded up her paperwork and looked at the young black male she was representing. "Shit ... shit..." Steve needed to speak to her again. He had to or he would go mad. "What? Was it for us? Our case?" "No. I have to go for a minute. Can you listen for it?" Steve gave him a copy of his police report. "It's for a guy named Jack Smith—got it? Find out what's going on with it, and I'll be right back." "Wait! Where the hell are you going?" Brian leaned back as Steve jumped over him to get out. Stumbling over bodies to get to her before she vanished, Steve kept saying 'excuse me' and nudging people aside as politely as possible. When he made it out of the room he found her standing at the elevator with her client. "Ms. Knight!" 16
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She turned, looking into his eyes. The prosecutor on the case read his name tag and then looked over his list. "Officer Miller, so we meet again." She smiled. "I hoped we would." He caught his breath. She glanced around nervously. "I'm rather busy. Is it urgent?" "In a way." He grinned. Looking around first, she then said sharply, "Perhaps you can ring my office if you have a problem." "I don't know your office number." Appearing put out by his request, she dug through her purse for a business card and handed him one in a huff. "Let's go," she told her client when the doors opened. "Are you on this case?" The prosecutor asked while looking at Steve's name tag. "No." About to add, "But, I'd like to be on hers," he stopped himself at the coolness of her expression and backed away as the elevator unloaded and loaded. In a blink of his weary eyes, she was gone. "Hey, good news, our Mr. Smith didn't show and the judge issued him with a bench warrant. What are you doing?" "Huh?" Steve looked over at Brian. "What? Didn't show?" "No. So, just get your overtime slip signed and let's get out of here. What's that?" Before he could prevent it, Brian had snatched the business card from his hand. "What the fuck do you want with a defense attorney?" "I ... uh..." 17
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"Wait! This is the name of the chick from the call last night! You devil! Was she here? I didn't even see no gorgeous blonde around! I knew you weren't gay!" "Oh, shut the fuck up, Potter! Gay..." Steve took the card back, shaking his head. "So, when are you seeing her? Did you guys make a date?" "You sound like my mother. Let me get my overtime slip signed so I can go home and sleep." Steve took the folded paper out of his pocket. "Here ... here's your report." "Oh, thanks, Potter." "No problem, Miller. See ya at the precinct later." "Right." Steve nodded and escaped him quickly. Making his way back into the madness of the original courtroom, he waved his slip in front of a prosecutor and he signed it without even reading it. Steve thanked him, then tried to get out of the building in one piece. Once he was inside the safety of his truck he read the business card a few times as if it would give him a clue as to her opinion of him or some hint of encouragement. It did neither. After the cool reception, he was wondering if he was barking up the wrong tree. Trying not to feel defeated, he started his truck and drove his way home to shed the uniform and catch a few more hours of sleep. Lying in his bed, staring at the ceiling, the daylight making sleep almost impossible, Steve picked up Sonja's business card from the nightstand and stared at it. The image of Sonja standing in the courtroom before the judge in her tiny little 18
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skirt was driving him mad. Imagining calling her, thinking of what to say, he felt the instant anxiety one gets from the fear of rejection. Since he couldn't sleep anyway, he got up, dressing in his running clothes, then headed out to run his normal route. **** Sweat dripping down his temples and chest, Steve untied the front door lobby key from his running shoe and opened it up. Jogging up the stairwell, then managing to enter his apartment while dripping with sweat and catching his breath, he finally got in, heading straight to the refrigerator for a bottle of water. He guzzled it thirstily and tried to cool down. Checking the thermostat, he turned it a few degrees cooler and hoped the air conditioning would kick in quickly. He made his way to the bathroom standing at the sink to look in the mirror. His tank top and shorts were drenched in sweat and he felt even more exhausted because of the odd shift hours he had to suffer during his work days. Trying to sleep and eat normally for two days was almost worse than keeping the odd hours consistently. After some time he began to cool down and catch his breath. Sonja's card was resting on the counter in the kitchen. He stared at it as he finished his water. "Fuck it." He picked up the phone and dialed. "Yes, I would like to speak to Ms. Knight, please." "Whom shall I say is calling?" "Uh ... Mr. Miller. Is she in?" 19
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"She's in court at the moment, can I take a message, Mr. Miller?" "No. No, it's all right. I'll call her back ... Oh, uh, do you know a good time to actually get her in the office?" "She does come back after three or four most days. You can try then. Are you sure you don't want me to take your number? It may be easier if she rings you back." "No. It's all right. I'll try her another day. Thanks." He hung up and stared back at the card again. "Shit. Now she'll know I called. I should have said Mr. Jones!" Cursing at his stupidity, he took a long hot shower. **** "Any messages, Yvonne?" Sonja stopped by her desk before going to her office. "Yes." She handed her a stack of notes. "Thanks." Unloading her briefcase on the chair and sitting at her desk, Sonja sorted through the messages quickly, then stopped at one. 'Mr. Miller, no call back number.' Sitting back in her leather chair, she smiled to herself. "Officer Miller..." Tapping her lips with the paper, she remembered the way he looked the last time she had seen him in that starched dark uniform, very handsome indeed. She actually imagined meeting him socially. Then reality kicked in. "You have to be kidding, Sonja! What are you going to do with a white macho cop?" She tossed the note into the waste basket and got busy on her calls. 20
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Chapter Three Having two week days off had its advantages and pitfalls. The shopping malls were less crowded, as well as the grocery stores, but all his old civilian friends were working and no one wanted to go out drinking on a weeknight. After completing some morning errands, he drove to his parents' house in Burbank, and parked behind his mother's Volvo in the drive. "Hello?" "Hello, Steven. Are you off today?" Susan, his mother, came to the screen door and unlocked it for him. "Yes, today and tomorrow. Is Dad working?" "You should know your father's schedule better than I do." "I suppose." He closed and locked the door behind him. "What are you up to?" "I was just making some cakes and cookies for this weekend's church charity bake sale." "Is that why it smells so good in here?" He sniffed his way to the kitchen, following behind her. "Have a seat. You want a cup of coffee?" "Yeah, thanks, Mom." When she made him one, she set it next to him at the table, then checked her oven quickly. Once she had, she sat down with him and pushed a loose strand of hair back from her forehead. "You look very tried, dear. Aren't you sleeping well?" "It's working nights. I hate it." 21
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"Your father doesn't work nights anymore. Why don't you get off them?" "Dad has been on the force for almost thirty years, he can do what he likes." "Can't you ask for a transfer?" "I will. But, I'm just in my first year, Mom. I don't want to look too anxious to move around. You get a bad reputation if you don't pay your dues. I'll do a little more, then try." She hopped up again and grabbed an oven mitt. When she removed the cookie tray a waft of sweet air filled the room. Steve moaned, sniffing the scent. "Christ, I can eat that whole tray." "Let them cool off a bit, then I'll give you some. Are you hungry? Oh, my, it is almost lunch time." "I'm starved." He stood and set the empty mug in the sink, looming over the baked goods like a vulture. "Let me make you a sandwich." "Okay." He stole a cookie off the sheet, burning his fingers and juggled the molten lava from one hand to the other, blowing on it. "Really, Steven, you can wait a minute." "No, ouch, I can't!" He sat down again and tore pieces of the gooey cookie off and stuffed them into his mouth. She finished making him a sandwich and shook some potato chips with it on the plate, then set it before him. As he dove into it and consumed it quickly, she shook her head at him. "You need a wife. You're not eating well, are you?" "When the hell can I eat? I get home at four in the morning, eat my dinner out of a microwave, most days I eat 22
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lunch in the patrol car ... Mom, it's just not the kind of job you can luxuriate on a big home cooked meal. That's why I come here." He smiled at her. "Good. Come for dinner tonight ... your sister is coming." "Okay." Are you seeing anyone?" He shrugged. "You're twenty-five, you need to have a girlfriend, Steven. I tell all the ladies at church to ask their daughters to meet you." He finished eating and stared at her. "You don't." "I do!" "For cryin' out loud, Ma, you make me sound like some wimp charity case!" "Nonsense." "No? Any takers?" "Not yet." "See!" Steve stood up, pushing in his chair. "I've got some errands to do. I'll be here at around five or so." "Okay." "You need me to buy anything to bring here?" "No, dear, I have everything we need." "Okay, see ya later." He kissed her cheek and left. **** It was nearing six, and Laura parked her car in front of her parents' home and looked around. Climbing out of her car, she grabbed her purse and approached the door and tapped it lightly. 23
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"Hello, Laura, dear." "Hi, Mom." "Come in. Help me set the table." "Isn't Steve supposed to be here?" "Not yet. He left to do some errands but he should be here shortly." "What about Dad?" She set her purse on the counter. Susan checked her watch. "I phoned him after Steve left to tell him you were all coming for dinner. He said he'd take some time off at the end of his shift to get here. I hope he hasn't gotten caught up on a late call ... oh, I hear someone ... Dick?" "No, it's me, Mom." Steve came in and closed the door. "You shouldn't leave it unlocked, Mom." "I don't normally. It's just that Laura just came in ... did you get all your things done?" "Yeah. Hi, Laura." He kissed her cheek. "Hey, Stevie. Man, do you look tired." "I am. I hate working nights." "Get off them." "I will. Ya got a beer, Mom?" "In the refrigerator." "You want one, sis?" "I'd rather have some wine." She followed him to the refrigerator and they both looked in. "That blush will be fine." He took out the bottle and handed it to her then grabbed a beer for himself and twisted the cap open. "Mom? Can I pour you a glass?" Laura asked. "I'll get it," Steve offered, taking the bottle from his sister. 24
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"All right, dear. Thank you. Where is your father?" She checked the time. "Is he coming home early?" Steve asked. "He's supposed to be." Susan set out a bowl of salad. While her back was turned, Steve nodded for Laura to go out to the living room to speak privately. They escaped the kitchen and Laura smiled at him curiously. "What's up?" "I'm in love." "Are you? Great! Who is she?" "She's an attorney. I met her on a call and I can't stop thinking about her." "How long have you been seeing each other?" Steve looked away from her eyes shyly, then said, "Well, I haven't even asked her out on a date formally yet." Laura laughed. "Well, maybe you should ask her out first! Duh!" "I'm dying to, but I don't think she'll go." "Why not? You're cute in a soldier-boy sort of way." "What?" He made a sour face at her analogy. "Soldier-boy? Shut the fuck up." "Well? You're my brother! I can't say you're gorgeous! Give me a break!" "Soldier-boy..." He shook his head and drank more beer. "Anyway ... what woman in their right mind would turn you down?" "This one." "I don't get it. Why are you even trying if she's not interested?" 25
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"Well, I'm not sure she's not interested, and I won't stop trying because she's amazing." "What's she like? Wait—let me guess—blonde bimbo with big tits." Staring at her in annoyance again, he sighed, "Why do I even talk to you?" "No? I get it wrong?" "Forget it." He moved to get away from her. "Wait, Stevie—" As he made it to the hall his father opened the front door. Steve saw he was still in his uniform. Sgt. Dick Miller was rarely out of it. "Hi, Dad." "Hi, Steve ... Laura. Sorry I'm late. Is your mother angry?" "A little..." Laura replied. "Late call?" "Yeah, some wacko spade fought with some security guards." Steve flinched at the racial slur. "Daddy!" Laura admonished. "That's not nice." "Since when did I raise a bunch of lefties?" He muscled his way passed them to the kitchen. "Sorry I'm late, Suz." "It's okay, Dick. I wasn't going to put it in the oven until you came home." "Good girl. Let me just get changed." "No rush, Dick." Watching him walk down the hall, Steve drank his beer. He didn't want to hate him, but sometimes he still did. **** 26
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The music soft and low, the candles flickering across the tiles and porcelain, aromatic bubbles of lavender and spices floating on the warm moist air. Sonja tried to unwind in the bathtub. A glass of wine drooping in her hand, her head resting on an inflatable pillow, she was almost drifting off when a light rap was heard at the door. "Sonja! Your mom is on the phone!" "Tell her I'll call her back!" "Okay!" Settling back down, Sonja finished her wine, allowing herself a few more minutes of luxury. Chelsea was curled up on the sofa in front of the flickering television in her sleepwear when she came into the living room. Sonja, in a fluffy robe and slippers, plopped down and let out a loud exhaled sigh. "Rough day?" Chelsea laughed at her. "Long. I need a vacation." "You need to stop defending creeps!" "That too. So? My mom called?" "Yeah." "I got to get up the energy to call her back. I'm just too tired to talk to her now." "You have to call her! If you don't she'll think I didn't give you the message!" "Yeah, yeah, don't get your panties in an uproar. Give me the damn phone." Chelsea handed her the cordless and lowered the sound on the television. 27
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Dialing, Sonja gazed dully at the screen. It was an old Ally McBeal repeat. "Hello, Daddy..." "Sonja! How you doin', child?" "I'm all right. Mama called. What'd she want?" "Just to talk to her, baby girl. How's the practice going?" "I'm sick of it, Daddy. Half of them are guilty as sin and they never even bother to show up most of the time. I feel like I'm not getting anywhere." "I didn't think it would take long for you to get disillusioned. You've been doing it for what, five years?" "Plus. I don't know what I want anymore." Chelsea peeked over at her. Yawning, Sonja rubbed her eyes tiredly. "Sonja, there are so many other branches of law you can do. I don't know why you don't get out of criminal law. You can do corporate law like I do." "It's what I thought I wanted to do, Daddy. I was really keen on it at first." "Oh, I know. You were all righteous and pigheaded about fighting 'the man'! But, I knew you'd get burned out. They're not all innocent, sweetheart. Not all innocent men out to get their names cleared." "I know, Daddy, I know..." She rubbed her face again. "Is Mama there?" "You hold on and I'll get her ... Leticia! Your daughter is on the phone ... Okay, Sonja, you be a good girl and stop by soon and see us." 28
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"I will, Daddy—Oh, I never even asked how you're doing, Daddy. How's your practice doing?" "We're all right. I can't complain. You know the door is always open if you want to come and join us." "I know. I appreciate that. Good night, Daddy." "Good night, sweetheart." "Hello?" "Hiya, Mama." "You sound exhausted, child. Why don't you take some time off?" "I can't right now, Mama. Soon. So, why did you call?" "Can't I call to talk to my daughter? I don't need a reason to call. If you called me more often, I'd not have to call you!" "I know, I'm sorry. You okay?" "I'm fine." "How about Harry? He staying out of trouble?" "I never hear from your brother. I don't know what he's up to. Both my children neglect me. And neither of you is married! How long do I have to wait before I have some grandchildren running around here?" "Forever. No one wants us we're so damn ugly." Hearing her mother roar with laughter, she looked at Chelsea and stuck her tongue out at her for listening. "You come here for dinner one weekend and bring a nice man with you. I'm sure there have to be lovely men out there you work with." Sonja thought of Officer Miller. "No, Mama, no men, only lesbians." 29
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Her mother laughed again and then said, "What am I going to do with you? What about Frank? Frank Williams ... you never talk about him anymore." "I don't see him much, Mama ... anyway, let me get some sleep. My eyes are rolling back in my head I'm so tired." "Go. Go get yourself some sleep. I love you, baby." "You too, Mama. Good night." She hung up and handed Chelsea the phone. "I'm going to bed. Don't forget to set the burglar alarm." "I won't. Good night, Sonja." **** Chelsea watched her go up the stairs, then sighed, turning the sound up on the TV set. Then Chelsea leaned over to the side table where the telephone sat and slid a card off of it. On that card was written a case number and the name, Officer S. Miller, LAPD.
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Chapter Four "...as you can see, Your Honor, the legality of the initial search falls under fruits of a poison tree. I therefore would like to strike them for use in the trial as illegal confiscated evidence..." He crept into the back of the room and sat down. It felt odd to be in that building in his street clothing on his day off. Dreading being recognized, he kept turning his face away from anyone in uniform. "...So stricken—the evidence obtained during an illegal search will not be used in the trial..." "But—Your Honor!" the prosecutor shouted. "Sorry, Council, you should have known better than to submit this report. Case dismissed with prejudice." Sonja smiled and closed her file. "Does that mean I can go?" the defendant asked. "Yes, but Manny, you keep yourself clean, you hear me? I got you off on a technicality and I don't want you back here! You got that? Get some therapy or rehab or you will be doing time!" "Yes, Ms. Knight. Thank you." As she watched him flee, she shook her head, stuffed the paperwork back into her leather case, and checked her schedule. "Free for lunch, Sonja?" Frank asked her. "Thanks for the offer, Frank..." She noticed Steve standing in the courtroom. "...but, I'll have to take a rain check." 31
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Frank turned to look to where she was staring, then asked, "Are you sure, Sonja? You've been avoiding me lately. At least let me take you out for a drink tonight." "Can I let you know?" "Sure, baby. You just call me when you change your mind." Frank winked at her and left with his briefcase in his hand. **** Having seen the entire interaction, Steve glared at him as he passed, but Frank never even noticed him standing there. "Officer Miller, are you stalking me?" Sonja asked, looking him over. "Yes, no! I mean, not really." "No uniform today?" "No. I'm off today." "Do you normally come to court in a business suit on your days off?" He opened a door for her and allowed her through. "Only when I'm subpoenaed." "Then shouldn't you be in court?" "No. Not today. I haven't been summoned to appear today." She walked to the elevator with him close behind. "Uh ... I wanted to take you out to lunch." Just standing with her was setting him on fire. He could smell her perfume, imagined touching her cheek. "Really? What makes you think I'm available?" 32
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They stepped in and waited for the door to close as a crowd of people did the same. When they began descending, Steve whispered in her ear, "I was hoping." Smiling, she didn't answer. They filed out of the tiny elevator box and into the lobby of the courthouse. Steve noticed a group of LAPD officers coming his way and twisted around to avoid them. Sonja had continued walking to the exit and stopped when she realized he wasn't still walking beside her. She paused and looked back at him curiously. Having successfully dodged his co-workers, he hurried to where she was waiting. "Lose something?" "Yes," he replied, "My mind, over you." "Why, Officer Miller, are you trying to seduce me?" "Is it that obvious?" He grinned shyly. "Yes." She smiled. They were standing in front of the very busy courthouse. The sun was brilliant in the blue sky and pedestrians came and went from all directions around them. "Please. Can I take you to lunch?" He imagined getting on his knees and pleading, Oh, please ... please ... please say yes! Taking a moment, she looked at her watch, then checked her diary quickly as he waited, holding his breath. "I think I can fit you in." "Great!" "Where would you like to go?" 33
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"Name it. Anywhere you like." His heart was pumping wildly in his chest. "All right. Where is your car?" Sinking slightly at the idea of having her climb into a large Ford truck, he thought on his feet and flagged down a cab. "This is quicker." He opened the door for her and gazed at her lovely long legs as she climbed in, salivating at the sight of her incredible fit body. When they had relaxed in the leather bench seat and were settled, the cab driver waited for a destination. Sonja said, "How about the Sunset Grille?" He nodded and started the meter as Steve melted in her aura of sex appeal. Sonja turned in her seat to look at him directly. "How long have you been an LAPD cop, Officer Miller?" "Steve. Call me Steve, please." "All right." "A little less than a year. I'm still on probation." "Well, that explains it." "Explains what?" "Why you haven't turned into a racist pig yet. I'll give you a few more months." "Ouch. That was harsh. You don't mean that." "Don't I?" Dying to touch her, he reached for her hand and couldn't believe how soft and smooth her mocha skin was. "No. I'm not like that." 34
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She glimpsed down at the contact, then raised her long dark lashes up to him again. "You will be. You all turn out that way." "I promise you, you're wrong about me." The cab came to a halt and the driver shouted, "Sunset Grille." Steve fumbled to get his wallet, feeling very defensive about what she was saying, and painfully hurt by some of the truth in it. He gave the driver the money and a tip. Climbing out, he hurried to her side of the cab to open the door. Gawking at her legs as they seemed to go on forever in her short skirt, Steve had to physically force himself to calm down and stop staring at her. He gave her his arm and she held it gently, allowing him to escort her to the front door of the restaurant. A doorman opened it for them and tipped his hat. Having this incredible woman on his arm made Steve feel like he was the luckiest man alive. The host greeted them and then led them to a table near the window. Steve asked, "Is this okay, Sonja?" "It's fine, Steve." She sat down as he held her chair and then set her briefcase under the table. Feeling completely out of his depth in such a fancy establishment, Steve stared at the man holding out the wine list, and took it from him, thanking him. "You want wine, Sonja?" "Why don't you order us a bottle?" "I knew you were going to say that." He shoved his finger into his collar uncomfortably. 35
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With Sonja watching him intently when the waiter approached, Steve cleared his throat awkwardly and asked him, "What do you recommend?" "We have some wonderful Australian Zinfandel that's been getting great reviews." Steve nodded, "That sounds great," handing him back the menu. After he left, Sonja teased, "Nice save." "Thanks. I'm trying not to fall on my face." "I can see that. No culture or fine cuisine in your family tree?" Leaning his elbows on the table to get closer to her, he replied, "Okay, here's where I either come up with some outrageous lies to make you think I'm high class, or tell the truth and risk you thinking I'm from white trash. Which do you want?" "Oh, lie to me, Steven, it'll be much more fun." "Christ, you are so beautiful." Blinking her eyes at him, she smirked, "Hmm, I tell him to lie and he tells me I'm beautiful." "No! I didn't mean that! Oh, just shoot me." "I could. You have your gun on you." He moved his jacket lapel to cover his shoulder holster. "Sorry. Regulation." Noticing the wine steward returning, he sat back as she observed his actions once more. He was shown the bottle. He nodded. The steward opened it and handed him a sample. He tasted it, nodding again. Two glasses were poured. Steve thanked him. 36
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When he left, Sonja asked, "How is the wine?" "I have no clue. It tastes okay to me." She laughed at him and lifted it up to sip. "Yes. A fine bouquet. Slight hint of plums and berries. Rich, full bodied. Good choice." Feeling so inadequate he could crawl under the table, he saved himself and replied, "That's exactly what I was going to say." "I know." She smiled sweetly. "You must think I'm insane. You know, to even try to go out with you." "I guess I'm just not sure why you want to?" He looked around them first, then leaned close so he could whisper. "Sonja, the minute I laid eyes on you that night at your house I was completely enamored. Not only are you intelligent, successful, and witty, you're the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I couldn't stop thinking about you. I know you must think I'm crazy. I'm sorry. I feel like I'm wasting your time. Forgive me." When she reached under the table to his thigh, he blinked his eyes wide. "Don't apologize. You have nothing to be sorry about." "Oh, God..." he whimpered, "Please don't tease me. I'll explode." Smiling in complete pleasure, she smoothed her hand up and down his tight muscular thigh and whispered, "Go ahead, explode for me."
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A tiny noise came out of his throat. Then he placed his hand down on top of hers and slowly brought it to his lips to kiss. Her expression changed to a soft sensuous pout as she watched him. "Do you want to make love to me?" Thinking he must be dreaming, he cleared his throat and squeaked out, "Yes..." "Are you free today?" "Yes!" "Let's have our lunch then, shall we?" He let her hand go reluctantly, raising his glass to her. She tapped his with her own and smiled at him. **** Too much wine firing his desires, Steve once again took a cab to his condominium leaving his truck in the police station lot. He let her into his building hoping he'd left the condo clean and not strewn with dirty clothing or dishes. Holding back from groping her until they were in private, he opened his door, deactivated the alarm, and gestured for her to come in. Moving slowly, she looked around the spacious condominium and appeared to be impressed with the design and style of the interior which was similar to the one she and her roommate shared. Trying to be polite and not drag her off to the bedroom like an animal, Steve tossed his keys down on the table and said, "Uh, can I get you anything?" 38
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Once she had set her briefcase down, she moved across the room to him and smoothed her hands over his chest under his suit jacket to his shoulders. Instantly he wrapped around her and brought her to his lips. When they made contact he groaned in delirium and grew weak in the knees. Slowly dropping his jacket down his arms, Sonja felt the leather holster and caressed it sensuously. And keeping his lips attached to hers, he unbuckled it and slid it down to the carpet, then held her shoulders and turned up the passion of their kissing. When he could he parted for a breath and moaned, "My God, you're amazing, amazing..." Untying his tie, opening his shirt, she spread it wide and smoothed her hands over his chest. Feeling her hesitate, he stared down at the contact and tried to catch his breath. "Sonja? What is it?" "Nothing..." He clasped her hands in his and kissed them lovingly. "Are we going too fast?" "No. No, Steve, I want this." Gently he urged her back to his bedroom and turned on a dim table lamp. As she watched, he took off his shirt and tie and draped them over a chair, then opened his slacks and let them drop soundlessly to the floor. In the flattering dim light, she smiled and purred, "Not an ounce of fat on you, Officer Miller." "And I intend to keep it that way." He took everything off but his briefs and then reached out to her. Before she embraced him, she began opening her blouse slowly. 39
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He dropped his hands to his sides and waited. Her top, her skirt, her hose and shoes, everything went until he stopped her at her matching lace bra and thong. "Wait ... not yet." As if in a dream he floated over to her kissing her lips. Slowly he worked his way down her neck to her breasts. She closed her eyes and let her head fall back as if she were savoring the tenderness and affection. The color of her skin and the texture were driving him completely mad. His mouth began watering at her incredible beauty. He wrapped his massive biceps around her and nuzzled her cleavage gently. "Oh, Sonja, you are such a woman ... I've never felt anything like this before." She moaned softly and closed her eyes. When he lifted her into his arms and set her down on the bed, she reached for him lovingly. His hungry kisses made their way all over her body. Touching her with warm tender hands he waited until she was squirming with pleasure and reaching for him to make love to her. He lowered the shoulder strap of her bra and found her nipple. As he sucked on it he felt her watching him, panting small breaths of air in her excitement. When he slipped his hand inside her thong she opened up for him like a rose. At one point when she had become calm and still, he sat up and reached into his nightstand. When he set the condom on the bed, she slid her thong off and waited. He stood off the bed and dropped his briefs down his legs. When he was exposed she reached out for him and stroked it gently. "You are one handsome man, Officer Miller." 40
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Kissing her lips, he whispered, "Make love to me, Sonja Knight." She found the condom and opened it, taking it out of its foil, then she rolled it on his length and reached out for him. When he penetrated they both gasped in amazement. "Oh, you feel so good ... so incredible," he breathed, as he thrust inside her, writhing on her hot dark skin, loving the feel of her breasts on his chest. She wrapped around his broad back and groaned in pleasure. It was slow. It was deliberate, and he was making sure it was just on the spot. Loving the damp heat between her legs, he clenched his teeth and held back waiting for her to come first. To his delight her heard her gasping wildly as she began to spin into an explosive climax. She arched her back and closed her eyes tight. Feeling her body burst with pleasure, he pushed in, pumping deep and hard and grit his teeth as he came, his entire body shuddering with chills. Forcing himself to open his eyes, he found her watching him, still catching her breath as she witnessed his expression of bliss. "You look fantastic when you come," she whispered sensually. Loving the compliment, he looked down at their connection and found one brown body and one tan one. "Look at that." She was still catching her breath when she asked, "Look at what?" "That." He nodded his head to where they were still attached. "Is that beautiful or what?" 41
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Leaning up to see what he meant, she smiled and lay back, laughing softly. "You are one hell of a fuck, Officer Miller." Blinking his eyes at her in surprise, he replied, "You're not so bad yourself, Ms. Knight!" "Whoa! I am so satisfied!" He burst out laughing at her expression and then finally pulled out to lie next to her. "I pleased you then?" He took off the condom and dropped it on the floor. "You did more than please me! Where did you learn how to make love to a woman like that? Is that what all white men are like?" She smiled slyly, her tongue planted firmly in her cheek. He roared with laughter and then wiped at his eyes as they filled with water. "Oh, Ms. Knight, you are a handful." "You have no idea! Do you know what you're in for?" She crossed her arms defiantly. "No, but I'm ready. Bring it on." He wrapped around her, nuzzling her. "Bring it on? You don't want me to bring it on, Officer Miller. You be careful what you're asking for!" "You think you scare me?" He leaned up over her, smiling. "Scare you? Of course I scare you!" He chuckled and said, "Well, you do a little. But not in bed!" "Speaking about bed..." "I know. I have to get you home." "Yes, and how are you going to do that without your car?" "I'll get us a cab." He stood. 42
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She watched him as he did, then asked, "What kind of car do you drive? What is it an old Volkswagen bus or something?" "Volkswagen bus? You really know how to hit a guy where it hurts ... no, it's a Ford truck. A brand new one." "Brand new? Then why were you afraid to let me see it?" "I just couldn't picture you wanting to climb in and out of a big rig." "So? What are you going to do? Buy a new car to chauffeur me around in?" He stopped what he was doing and looked at her. "Does that mean you'll see me again?" She sat up and fixed her bra. "I didn't say that." "But, you implied it." "Don't you go putting words in my mouth." Feeling let down, he mumbled, "I just need to wash up," and pointed to the bathroom. When he returned she held up a framed photo of his academy graduation with his parents and a young woman in it. She asked, "Is that your ex-girlfriend?" "No, it's my sister, Laura." He started getting dressed. She set it back down and watched him. "Why do you look like you just got your face slapped?" "I feel like I did." "Why?" "Well, you said you don't want to see me again." He slipped on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. "I did? When did I say that?" "You—You said—" 43
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"Shut your stupid mouth and come over here and kiss me." He brightened, embracing her, kissing her passionately. Setting back to stare at her face, he asked, "So, you'll see me again?" "I think I can fit you in." He grinned excitedly and went for her neck, kissing and rubbing his face on it playfully. "Oh! You give me a hicky and I'll give you a fat lip!" "No hicky, promise." When they slowed down she reached up and cupped his face tenderly. "You are a very lovely man, Officer Miller." "A man who is falling head over heels in love with you." Sighing softly, she whispered, "What ever am I going to do about you?" **** Pulling her Mercedes into the driveway, she climbed out, carrying her briefcase and purse up to the front door. As she approached, Chelsea opened it for her. "Hey." "Hey back." Sonja set her things down by the stairs and headed to her bedroom to change. "Did you eat?" "Had a big lunch. I may just fix myself a salad." Chelsea hopped up the stairs behind her. "Who did you have lunch with?" "You're worse than my mother—on me with the questions the minute I walk through the door!" She laughed, kicking off 44
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her high heels, then headed to her walk-in closet for some comfortable clothing. Waiting by her door until she emerged, Chelsea sighed, "Well, I think I may have made a fool of myself." "Why's that?" Sonja shouted out to her as she changed. "I called the police precinct where that cop works." When silence returned, Chelsea shouted, "Can you hear me in there?" "Yes..." "Well, I just thought about him, you know, and figured maybe we could get together or something. I mean, I'm not a criminal attorney, it's not like we have any weird karma or anything going..." She waited, then moved closer to the closet. "You sure you can hear me?" Sonja had changed into her loungewear and was hanging up her skirt and blazer. Chelsea sighed, "But, he wasn't in, so I left my name with some stupid desk clerk. Now I wish I hadn't. I mean, if he liked me, he would have tried to call here, right? I mean, he has my home number, right? So, odds are he's not interested and I just made an ass of myself ... Sonja! Are you even listening to me?" Finally stepping out of the closet, Sonja walked passed her and mumbled, "I need a glass of wine." Chelsea immediately followed her down the stairs. "So? Did I make an idiot of myself or what?" "I didn't know you were even interested in him." She checked the refrigerator for an open bottle and took out some Chardonnay. 45
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Reaching into the cupboard, Chelsea took out two stemmed glasses and set them on the counter. "I am, sort of. The dating scene has gone flat for me and I don't know why. I mean, I'm great looking, right, Sonja? And I have a nice body ... I've got the look—you know, the Hollywood-actress-look. My father always said I should be an actress, not a lawyer, so, I mean, why wouldn't he ask me out? Right? Sonja?" "Maybe he's married, or has a girlfriend or something." She set the bottle back and wouldn't meet Chelsea's eyes. "No ... no way. He didn't have on a ring, and that night I think he was really flirting with me. Remember? You saw the way he was drooling over me in my little baby-doll pj's. So, I just assumed he'd call or jump at the chance to date me." Finally looking at her over her wine glass, Sonja laughed sadly. "I never knew you were such a narcissist. Listen to yourself ... drooling over you? That Hollywood-actress-look? When the hell did you come all over conceited?" "I'm not conceited! I just know these things! I hear them!" "Ya don't hear them from me!" She coughed and brought her wine with her to the dining room table and set it down. "You did say it! You said I was pretty when you described me on the phone to your mother. Remember?" Retrieving her briefcase from the living room, Sonja set it by her glass of wine and opened it up to get out some paperwork. "That was when we first moved in together, three years ago! She hadn't met you then." "Well, whatever, that's what you said." "Look, I've got some work to do ... okay if we talk later?" 46
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"But, you never answered my question!" "What question?" "Was I stupid to call Officer Miller and leave a message for him?" Taking a minute to consider that ironic question, Sonja finally said, "I guess you'll find out if it was." Chelsea pouted when Sonja sat down with her back to her and began reading through some files. When she heard her leave the room, Sonja gazed at the curtains on the window directly in front of her and rubbed her forehead tiredly. Under her breath she whispered, "Just what I need, another complication revolving around the life of the handsome Officer Miller." Her life was complex enough, but she couldn't help the fact that she was falling deeply in love with a white LAPD cop. **** Parking his truck in the condo lot, Steve activated the alarm and used his key to get into the stairwell of the condominium. Taking them two by two, he went over the few hours he spent with Sonja again and again in his mind. Coming through his door, deactivating the alarm, he closed and locked it, then set his gun pack down in the kitchen with his keys. When he walked into his bedroom he found the bed still unmade from their lovemaking. Standing still, looking down at it wistfully, he could just about catch a scent of her perfume lingering in the air. Moving to the mattress, he lifted a pillow to his nose and inhaled, hoping to find her scent still 47
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present. He sat down on the bed, setting the pillow on his lap, staring down at it. Who was he kidding? She was so far out of his league he couldn't even imagine she would see him again. He checked the time and found it was nearing five. Rubbing his face tiredly, knowing he had to work tomorrow, another late shift from early evening to early morning. He wanted to call Sonja and make her commit to another date, but worried he may be rushing her. Motivating himself to get up and stop ruminating, he straightened up the bed, then the room. When he was done he took a cold beer out of the refrigerator. Feeling worn out, he dropped down on his couch and flicked through the channels on the television.
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Chapter Five "Miller!" "Yeah?" "There's a phone message here for you from your days off." "Where?" He stood over the clerk as he shuffled through the scraps of paper. "Thanks." Walking away as he read it, finding it was from Chelsea, he crumbled it up and muttered, "Crap..." under his breath. Trying the combination to his locker, he cursed and shook it angrily, then took a deep breath. He made another attempt at the numbers. "Bad two days off?" Brian laughed. "What happened? Spend them crying yourself to sleep over your loneliness?" Rolling his eyes in annoyance, Steve decided not to answer and tugged open the locker door roughly when it stuck. "Lay off the rookie, Bri!" Gary shouted, buttoning his uniform shirt, "He's just realizing now he's lost all his civie friends! You're stuck with just cops from now on, Miller! Like it or lump it!" "Christ, stuck with you lot! How lucky can a guy get?" He undressed and kept his back to the banter. "Didn't your father warn you, Miller?" Brian laughed. "Who's his father?" Gary shouted to him. "Sgt. Dick Miller." "No! That's your dad? Man, I feel sorry for you, Miller." 49
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Steve kept his mouth shut and fastened his gun belt around his waist, just catching the eye of a black officer who was trying not to eavesdrop as he changed. Steve knew his father had a reputation, and didn't want any of that fallout hitting him. When he tried to say hello to the man, he found he was too late and missed catching his eye when the officer turned around to continue getting ready. The teasing finally abating behind, Steve finished dressing and shut the locker door with a slam. He stood at the mirror checking his hair and appearance when he noticed the black cop passing behind him in the mirror. Steve tried to catch up to him as he left the locker room. As he did the officer looked over at him curiously. "I don't think we've met officially," Steve said. "I'm Steve." He reached out his hand. "Isaac. Isaac Johnson." They shook hands. As they walked down the hall, Steve mumbled to him, "I don't know if you were listening to any of that bull crap in there." He gestured to the locker room. "I try not to get involved." "Oh, well, it's just that one of the guys made a comment about my father, Sgt. Miller—" Pausing, staring at Steve curiously, Isaac waited. Feeling like an idiot, Steve had to finish what he started reluctantly. "It's just, well ... he's kind of an old fashioned sort of cop—" "Uh huh." Isaac narrowed his eyes at him. "And, I just want people to know I don't agree with his views ... you know. And being so new, I just don't want 50
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people to judge me by his standards. Do you know what I mean? Or am I just making a complete ass out of myself?" Isaac started to smile at him. "You don't mean just 'people', you mean 'people of color'." "Uh ... yeah. Sorry to even have to say it. It's just my old man holds certain beliefs and I don't want to be categorized like that." "I get it." **** Brian stopped Gary's progress as they left the locker room and moved down the hall to the roll call rooms. "Check out Miller." Gary stopped and looked at him as he and Isaac spoke quietly ahead of them. "What about him?" "He won't talk to us, but I can see who he will talk to." Gary shook his head and said, "Shut up, Potter," and kept walking. **** "Thanks, Isaac." Steve patted him on the shoulder. "No problem, man. I appreciate you making the effort." Steve winked at him and they moved on to their prospective squad rooms. When he sat down for the roll call and briefing before shift, Steve noticed Brian standing against the wall when he usually sat down at the same table next to him. Trying to catch his eye, about to wave him over to his seat, Steve noticed he averted his gaze on purpose and pretended he was busy 51
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reading a wanted bulletin. Thinking it was odd but nothing more, Steve sat looking straight ahead as the sergeants called everyone to attention for roll call. **** "Sonja!" Hearing her name, she stopped in the crowded corridor and turned to look over the many business-suited shoulders. "You never returned my call." "Oh, hello, Frank. I've been very busy this week. I'm sorry." "You never used to be too busy for me." He caressed her cheek with his knuckle. Very gently she nudged it away. "Well, it's just this week, Frank. I've been really snowed under. I haven't had a minute to breathe." "Carl saw you at the Sunset Grille yesterday." "Oh? So what? I can't eat out?" "Who were you with?" "A client. Look, Frank, I have to meet one now and you're making me late." She checked her watch. "A client? He said he looked more like a cop than a client. He said he was wearing a damn shoulder holster." "Carl needs to mind his own business!" "Hold on!" Frank grabbed her elbow as she tried to slip away. She glared at his hand until he removed it. "Don't you man-handle me, Frank Williams." "You never used to mind." 52
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"I really have to go—" "What are you doin' having lunch with a damn honky cop? What's going on, Sonja?" "I said—Mind your own business!" Keeping up with her as she hurried down the hall, Frank replied, "Your father is giving a presentation this Saturday night at the NAACP, so, I thought we could go together. He said we could join your mom and him for dinner. Sonja, stop moving and talk to me! Are we going to the dinner together Saturday night?" Forgetting about the dinner completely, she slowed down and tried to think. "You can't miss it. Your father would be very disappointed." "I know. It just slipped my mind it was this weekend." "Right. Now we can talk some sense. I'll pick you up at your place at seven." Against her better judgment she said, "All right. But just for the dinner! I'll have Daddy drive me home." "What on earth has come over you? You've gone cold on me, Sonja." "I'm just tired, Frank. Now I'm late—excuse me!" **** It was ten PM and the call volume had subsided slightly. Steve asked the radio dispatch for a break and she gave it to him. He put his patrol car in park and shut off the lights, then looked at that house. It was lit from within and both cars were in the drive. Reclining in the seat he imagined having 53
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the courage to knock, but after Chelsea's call to the precinct he knew it wasn't a good idea. **** "I'll put it out, Sonja." "No. Never mind, you're in your pajamas ... I'll do it." She wrapped up the trash and tied the plastic at the top. "I'm going to take a bath and then hit the sack." "Okay, girl, you go and relax. Good night." Bringing the trash can out to the front for the morning collection, Sonja came around the side of the house and froze. A patrol car was parked across the street from her house. "What on earth?" **** When a few of the lights darkened, Steve figured they were going to bed. He flipped his headlights on and was about to tell the dispatcher he was available for a call. Then, he noticed her standing there. He clipped the mike back on the hook and waited to see what she would do. She set out the trash and wrapped her sweater around her tightly as she walked in her slippers across the road to him. "Officer Miller?" "Hello, Ms. Knight." "What on earth are you doing here? Are you spying on me?" "No. Not really. Just that since you had that burglary attempt I thought it would be a good idea to hang around a little." 54
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"You expect me to buy that?" "No, not really." He smiled. "Christ, I want to kiss you ... so much." "You know, if the neighbors see this my reputation will be ruined." Seeing her wry smile, he replied, "I know ... cops are more unpopular than criminals these days." "You got no one to blame but yourselves!" "I don't want to get into all that. Come closer so I can touch you." She moved nearer to his fingers, then peeked over her shoulder at the house. "I don't want Chelsea to see us." "She called the precinct on my days off and left a message." "I know." He clasped her hand and kissed it gently. "She's got one mean crush on you, Steve, and if she sees us together it'll hurt her." "You're a good friend, Sonja." With her free hand she caressed his hair, moving it away from his face. Instantly aroused, he opened the door to the car, got out, embracing her. The movement startling her in its abruptness, she opened her mouth to say something, then closed her eyes, returning the hug. When she felt his vest she rapped her knuckles on it. "It's like hugging a robot!" "I know. Sorry." 55
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"You really need to wear that thing? It's frightening. You won't let anything happen to you, will you, Steve?" The radio crackling in the background, Steve knew he needed to clear his break, he just didn't want to go. He cupped her face and leaned down to kiss her. There was something so risqué about what they were doing it excited something deep inside him. Her tongue driving him wild, he began to get completely wound up and knew he had to slow down—to stop. Then he felt her impulsively reach in the darkness to his crotch to feel how hard he'd gotten from the contact. "Sonja ... oh, Sonja ... I'm so glad I came here ... mmm, your touch..." "This is madness—What am I doing groping this LAPD cop in the dark street leaning against his patrol car in front of my house? It is absolute madness." Smiling to himself at her raving, her hand was still rubbing on his cock as it pressed against his thigh under the trousers. "I'm telling you, Steve, I'm imagining ripping your clothing off, exposing you and making wild love to you in the street!" "Oh, yes ... what a fantasy!" Suddenly, through his hazy brain he heard his call sign. "Shit." "What?" "Hang on." He answered the dispatcher, keying his lapel microphone. "9 Lincoln 59, are you available for a call in your district?" "9 Lincoln 59, Roger, Code 1." She acknowledged him and he heard his computer beeping inside the car. "You have to go?" 56
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"Yes. It's just a paper call, nothing urgent." She had stopped fondling him, but continued to cup her hand over his cock. "I love the feel of it in my hands, baby, but most of all I adore the paradox of molesting a man in full police uniform ... but don't you tell any one!" "Your secret's safe with me ... Oh, Sonja, I need to see you again ... off duty." Slowly she let her palm glide down his crotch to rest on his thigh. When she didn't answer he used his finger to lift her chin so she would meet his eye. "What are you doing this weekend? I can ask for Saturday night off." "No. Not this Saturday." The way it was said, so abruptly, he studied her dark brown eyes curiously. Then she added quickly, "My father is giving a speech Saturday night." "Oh ... I see." "I ... I have to be there." "Yes. Of course." "Can ... Can I let you know?" Again feeling deflated that she wouldn't commit to a day, he nodded, casting his eyes down. After a look behind her to the house, she held him for a last passionate kiss. Waving, she hurried back to the door. He waited until she was inside. Climbing into the car tiredly, Steve put it into drive and headed to his call. **** 57
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Tiptoeing back into the kitchen, Sonja locked the door, set the alarm, then crept up the stairs to her bedroom. Before she did, she pressed her ear to Chelsea's door and listened, didn't hear anything from inside it, and moved on to wash up for bed. Once she was horizontal she curled into fluffy pillows and crisp sheets to think. No matter which direction her thought process went, it spelled trouble. "Trouble with a capital MILLER!" she sighed in frustration. "Why do I want you? I must be out of my head!" **** As he was writing up his report, lost on his thoughts and struggling to concentrate with his mind in his trousers, a message popped up on his computer. He read it and typed Brian back. "I brought my lunch." Another message appeared. "Meet?" "I'm in the church parking lot off Juniper Drive," he typed, then hit the send button on computer and went back to his car prowl report. When the headlights of another patrol vehicle appeared, Steve rolled his window down all the way and waited as it pulled up, window to window. When he found it wasn't Brian he was surprised. "So, this is where your hideout is, Miller!" "You found me!" He smiled at her. Lydia set the car in park and grinned at him. "You sick of late shift yet?" "Yes. I'm dyin' here." 58
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She saw someone else coming in and asked, "Who's that?" "It's Potter. He asked to meet." The third patrol car pulled up on the opposite side of Steve's car. He lowered that window as well. "What do you want?" Steve asked him. "Just figured we could hang out. What a slow fucking night! You still on that car prowl?" "Yes. Just about done writing it up." "What do you have, Lydia?" Brian shouted through Steve's car at her. "Attempt burg," she shouted back. "Yeah? Where is it?" Steve asked. "Over at the Van Nuys neighborhood." "I just had an attempt over there last week." "Huh ... most likely the same guy." "Back window?" "Yup. Kitchen." "Same guy." "So," Brian shouted in annoyance as he had to yell to be heard, "...you brought your lunch again?" "Yes. I don't like eating out this late. Fucks me up." "What do you eat then?" "Just a salad ... light stuff." "What the hell are you, Miller? A carrot cruncher?" Lydia laughed and then smiled at Steve. "I just don't want to turn into a fat couch potato like you, Potter!" "Ouch!" Lydia laughed again. "Shut up, Brown!" 59
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"Make me!" she yelled at him. "Children, don't make me stop this car," Steve teased. "God, it's so dead!" Brian groaned. "You'll jinx it!" Lydia warned. "Whenever you say it's dead, all hell breaks loose! So, shut up!" "You shut up!" "Children! I'll not say it again!" Steve shouted. "Okay, I'm going to clear my call. Ready?" He hit the button and waited. Nothing happened. "Told you it was dead." Brian reclined in his car and sighed. "Right. My turn." Lydia cleared her call as well and set her paperwork aside. She looked through Steve's car to see Brian resting his head on the seat and his eyes closed. "So, uh, Steve ... "she spoke softly, hoping Brian couldn't hear. "Hmmm?" He looked over at her. "You ... you, uh, you seeing anyone?" Cracking a smile at the pretty, petite cop, he said, "Sort of." "Yeah? Sort of? Does that mean you're free to date other people kind of sort of, or not free kind of sort of?" "Uh..." With his eyes still closed, Brian shouted to her, "He's out of your league, Brown!" "Shut up, Brian!" she shouted back in embarrassment, not realizing he had heard. "He's got some hot blonde with big ones from Van Nuys he's seeing, right, Miller? So hot she could be a centerfold!" "Will you shut up, Brian!" she screamed. 60
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Steve shushed them to listen to the dispatcher. "Shit. I knew it." "Christ! A shooting! I knew it, too!" Lydia moaned. "You got it?" Brian asked. "It's in your district." "I got it." Steve grabbed the radio and told the dispatcher he was on his way to the scene. The air waves came alive with units to back him up, including the two with him. Flicking on his lights and sirens, Steve revved up the engine. "Right behind you, Miller!" Brian shouted, igniting his lights as well. "Woooo!" Lydia shouted and hit the gas. Seeing a line of speeding patrol vehicles screaming with sirens blazing in his rear view mirror, Steve's adrenaline was pumping under his vest.
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Chapter Six Munching on a bowl of bran flakes, Sonja turned on the television to catch the news and traffic report. Chelsea poured her a cup of coffee and set it on the table next to her. "Thanks, sweetie." "My pleasure." ...and the top story this morning is of a gang shooting leaving two people dead at the infamous nightclub... Sonja perked up and leaned over the table as Chelsea did the same. ...officers arrested two suspects and the area is still blocked off as the homicide detectives investigate the scene... "Look! Officer Miller!" Chelsea pointed in excitement. Sonja suddenly understood what it must be like to be married to a cop. She felt sick from thinking something could happen to him. "Close up! Get a damn close up!" Chelsea shouted. "Christ, you can see his cheekbones from here! Oh, he is so fricken' hot! Why didn't he call me back?" A lieutenant was talking to reporters, giving sparse details as a few officers could be seen behind him working. "Get out of the way, you old fart!" Chelsea whined. "I want to see my Officer Miller!" "Your Officer Miller?" Sonja choked. "Well, I can dream, can't I?" "Girl, you can get anyone you want, why do you want a damn LAPD cop?" 62
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Shrugging, she said, "I don't know. Cuz he's cute?" ...the first officers that responded to the scene made the arrest ... we think we've got all the outstanding suspects, but we're still in the interviewing process... "Man, I wouldn't want his job." "Whose? That man's?" Sonja pointed to the lieutenant. "No! Officer Miller's job!" "I know. He's a crazy fool to do that job." "I think he's brave. I know you don't like cops, Sonja, but someone's got to keep the tide back. You just hate them because you defend those felons out there." "Don't start on me!" she warned. "Well? What will you do if you end up defending one of these guys who killed someone? You just feel sorry for them and get them off to let them kill again!" "Chelsea, enough! I don't need this crap first thing in the morning." She set her bowl in the sink and stormed up the stairs to get ready for work. "Do something else!" Chelsea shouted after her. "Do contract law like me!" Slamming her door to shut out the lecture, Sonja took off her robe and stepped into her closet to find an outfit for the day. "First I got you mooning over my lover! Then I get a lecture about my career! I swear, Chelsea Saunders, one of these days!" she muttered waving her fist at the closed bedroom door. ****
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"I'd like to get started writing this up, Sgt. Lee," Steve said. "Yeah, go on, Miller. Homicide is handling it from here, so just do a quick one page report with the suspect and victim names. Then get your overtime slip to me and go home." "Thanks." As he walked to his patrol car which was in a tangle of other police vehicles he found someone seated in the driver's seat of their own waving him over. Scuffing his weary feet to him, he leaned in and said, "Hi, Dad." "Christ, you look like hell." "I feel like shit. I still have to write the fucking thing up." "I don't know why we bother. So, some gang shit-heads killed each other. No great loss." Knowing this could turn ugly, he stood up to walk away. "I'm glad they're shooting each other!" Sgt. Miller shouted to him, "Less of the fuckers around!" Pausing, he added, "You coming by this weekend?" Steve nodded and waved, not looking back. **** Six hours of overtime later, Steve ended up crawling into bed at ten am and closed his eyes in complete exhaustion. When the phone rang he almost cried in agony. "Yeah?" "I just wanted to make sure you were all right." "Sonja!" He sat up in bed. "I saw the news and I was really freaked out you were on that horrible scene." 64
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"I was all right. It was really mostly over when we got there. We just had to clean up after the mess." "I was sick over it, Steve." "You were really worried about me?" He smiled, despite his weariness. "Yeah, don't go getting a swelled head or anything." "I do adore you. You know that?" "You stop that now, you hear? I'm at work." He leaned back, sighing. "I wish you were here, in my bed." "Oh, shit. You were sleeping. I'm sorry, Steve. I woke you up. I never thought of that." "I don't mind you waking me, believe me." "And you have to be at work again tonight, right?" "Yes." "How do you do it?" "I don't know. I need to get off nights." "It's not natural. You can't function like that." Pausing to think about it, he said, "You really do care about me, don't you?" He expected a snappy answer back in self-defense. A long pause followed and then she just whispered, "Maybe I do." "Ohhh, baby, baby ... please ... tell me when I can see you again. Don't be elusive and vague. Give me a day." "When are you off next?" "Monday, Tuesday. But—I can take any night off if you just let me know." 65
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"Monday, Tuesday? Wow, those are some really romantic days of the week." "They rotate. I'll have a weekend off here soon." "Okay, Monday." "Really?" "After work—I'll see you." "What do you want to do?" "I don't know. What the hell can we do on a damn Monday?" She laughed. "Come here ... come to my place." She purred, "All right..." "Do you want to come straight after work? I can get us something to eat." "Sounds nice." "Yes! I am so excited! Sonja, just talking to you makes me hot." "Don't you go playing with that thing without me!" "I won't. It's all yours." "All right. Let me let you get some rest." "Thanks for calling. I really appreciate it. And I can't wait to see you Monday." "Sleep. I'll see you soon." "Bye, baby." **** "Bye." She hung up and smiled dreamily. "Sonja, your father's on line one." "Okay, Yvonne." She hit the button and said hello. 66
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"Sonja—I just wanted to remind you about the dinner this Saturday." "I know, Daddy. I wouldn't miss it." "Good girl. I told your mother you remembered but she still wanted me to remind you." "I'll be there." "Is Frank taking you?" "...yes..." "You don't sound too happy about it. Anything happened between you?" "Nothing, Daddy. Nothing happened." "He's a good man, Sonja. He does a lot for the community." "I know, Daddy." "And your mother keeps harping on me about grandchildren!" "Oh, don't even bring that up again!" "Well, we can't seem to get either you or your brother interested in marriage. I don't understand either of you." "Just waiting for the right one, Daddy." "Don't wait forever, Sonja, don't wait forever." "Is Harry coming to the dinner, too, Daddy?" "Yes. He's bringing some new date with him." "I'm not surprised. He's such a player." "Be nice about your brother." "Look, let me get back to work." "Okay, sugar, I'll see you Saturday night." "See ya." She hung up the phone, frowning, then thought to herself, I don't want to see Frank again. But the thought of 67
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bringing Steve to meet my parents is daunting to say the least ... All right girl, shake herself out of this mood, and time to focus on work once again.
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Chapter Seven Hoping it was going to be slow since he got very little sleep and felt as if he hadn't taken off the uniform for forty-eight hours, Steve left the parking lot of the precinct in his patrol car and headed straight to Van Nuys. Just as he was getting close to her house he noticed a strange Cadillac parked out front and stopped, pulling the car over out of sight quickly to watch. **** "Have fun, you two!" Chelsea smiled as they left. "Thanks, Chel ... you behave yourself as well!" "No chance of that, Sonja!" "Where she going?" Frank asked as he held the door open for her. "Some club in downtown LA." **** As she stepped out Steve could see the sequined evening gown and feather boa clearly. Behind her that same tall attorney was in a tuxedo waving good-bye to her roommate. He opened the door as she climbed in and then went to the driver's side. As he watched, the gold Cadillac vanished down the suburban street. He had no idea he could feel so crushed. Struggling to get his anger and emotions under control, Steve gripped the steering wheel with white knuckles and drove away. 69
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**** "Sonja!" Harold shouted to her. "There's my father, Frank." "Right. See if we can make our way to him in this crowd." Moving through the mob of patrons, Sonja finally stood before him and hugged him tight. "Your speech was inspirational, Daddy." "Thank you, sweetheart. Frank, good to see you again." "Harold, you, too. It's been ages ... Leticia, how have you been?" "Good, Frank, you?" They exchanged kisses on the cheek. "Good. Very good." "Where's our table, Daddy?" "Over there. Your brother is standing with his date near it. You see him?" "Yes. Where was he sitting earlier?" Sonja asked. "He just got here." "You mean he missed your speech and just came for the dinner? Oh, Daddy, what are we going to do with him?" "I don't mind. Look, he made the effort." "Effort?" Leticia snorted, "It's the least he can do for all we've done for that boy!" "Let's not get started, Leticia. Let's make it a nice peaceful night, all right?" "I didn't start anything, your son is the one who started it." "Come on, Mama, let's get a seat so we can have a glass of wine." Sonja escorted her mother to the table. 70
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When they approached, Sonja gave Harry, Jr. her disapproving eye. "Don't you look at me like that," he defended. "You missed your father's speech!" "I tried to get here on time. I just couldn't." Frank interrupted them and asked, "Who's this lovely lady you've brought with you?" "This is Althea. Althea Jackson." "Nice to meet you Althea. My name is Frank Williams." She shook his hand and then hooked back onto Harry's arm. "And this ugly so and so is my sister, Sonja." Harry smiled. "Hi." Althea waved. "Hi." Sonja gave her a slight nod, then said, "Mama, sit down." Sonja sat next to her mother as Frank sat down next to her. Harry, Jr. left a seat next to his mother for his father, then sat down with Althea beside the vacant chair. Frank offered to pour some wine for everyone. Once each had a full glass, they raised a toast and sipped it down thirstily. "Frank," Leticia began, "So nice of you to bring Sonja so she didn't have to come alone." "Don't start, Mama." "She's twenty-nine and needs to settle down." "I swear I'll leave if you keep this up," she warned. "It's not from me not trying, Leticia. Believe me, nothing would make me happier than to slide a ring on this woman's finger." 71
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"Child, what are you waiting for!?" "I swear! I'll leave!" Sonja pointed her finger in warning at them. When she caught Harry laughing at her, she sneered, "Don't you laugh at me. I don't see why you can't give her grandchildren. She doesn't care where they come from. You can give her some stranger's babies and she'll be happy." "Oh, Sonja, behave yourself!" her mother chided. "You started it, Mama." "Here comes Dad." Harry, Jr. waited as he sat down next to him. "Sorry I missed your speech, Pop." "I'll give you a copy of it to read," he answered sarcastically. "Good one, Dad," Sonja grinned. "I hope you're all behaving yourselves. There are a lot of influential community leaders here and you should all be introducing yourselves to them." "We will, Dad. Once we've eaten. I'm starving. When's the dinner going to be served?" Harry asked. "Typical Harry, a walking stomach." Sonja nudged Frank to pour her more wine. "Who is this young lady you have with you?" Harold asked. "Oh! Sorry, Dad! This is Althea." "Nice to meet you, Althea." "Hi. Nice to meet you, sir." "Harold." "Yes, Frank." "Tell me ... how do I get in on volunteering for the legal defense fund?" 72
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While they chatted across the table, Leticia whispered to Sonja, "What's wrong with you and Frank?" "Not now, Mama," Sonja whispered. "You lose interest in him?" "Yes." "Why? Did he go out on you?" "I don't care what he's doing." "I don't understand. I thought you two had a nice thing going." "Not now. Okay? He may hear you." Shaking her head, Leticia sat back as they began serving the salads. As they ate, sharing some light conversation between bites, Sonja felt Frank's hand settle on her thigh. She peered down at it, then very discreetly picked it up and moved it off her leg. "What's wrong with you?" "I'm eating dinner with my parents." "They can't see." "I don't care." "Why have you gone so cold, Sonja?" "Shh! Not now!" Catching her mother's suspicious eye, she ignored the look and kept eating. "You hear about that gang shooting?" Harry, Jr. asked. "I can't believe two men were killed. You going to defend them, Sonja?" "I don't know." "I'll bet the stupid LAPD fucks up the investigation." He laughed, finishing his dessert. 73
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"Hey!" Sonja shouted. Everyone at the table stared at her curiously. "What on earth is wrong with you?" Leticia asked. "Oh, my God!" Harry, Jr. laughed, "Did Sonja just defend 'the man'? You're a traitor!" "I am not! It's just that they don't always fuck it up." Frank stared at her strangely. "Yeah they do!" Harry, Jr. challenged her. "Was that an LAPD cop you had lunch with?" Frank accused angrily. Everyone stopped eating to glare at her. Looking to see her father's reaction, she shook her head. "No! Don't be absurd!" "Who was he then!?" Frank demanded. "He ... he was a private investigator, all right? He was helping me with my defense of a client. Geez-Louise, I can't make a damn move without someone scrutinizing me." Sonja noticed her parents exchange worried looks. "I don't like to be lied to, Sonja," Frank grumbled. "Neither do I!" Leticia shouted. "All right!" Harold waved his hands for them to calm down. "Leave the girl alone. If she says it was a private investigator, then we believe her." Feeling the evil eyes around her, Sonja lost her appetite and avoided looking at anyone. As the evening wound down, her father was shaking hands with everyone who had attended and was encouraging financial support for the organization. 74
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Sonja stood with her mother as Harry, Jr. kissed her cheek and said goodbye to her. When he came to his sister he said, "You just take care of yourself, Sonja. Don't go doing anything stupid." "That's rich coming from you. You're the king of stupid." "I'm not involved with no LAPD goon." "Shut up! Who says I'm involved with the police? You believe everything you hear from Frank? He's just a jealous man." "You can keep denying it, Sonja, but if it's true we'll all find out sooner or later." "Oh, just crawl back under your rock, will you? And take Bambi with you." "Althea ... not Bambi ... I think that bimbo you live with is beginning to rub off on you." "You're not too old for a slap." "Later—" He walked passed her. "You ready, sugar?" Frank wrapped his arm around her waist seductively. "Hmm? I told you I was going home with my parents, Frank." "Well, your mother said I was driving you." "What? Mama, I'm going home with you and Daddy." "Why can't Frank take you home? It's out of our way, Sonja and I just want to go home and sleep." "Fine. Take me home, Frank." She wrapped her boa around her shoulders in annoyance. "You leaving, Sonja?" 75
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"Yes, Daddy. I was very proud of you tonight." She kissed his cheek. "You, too, dear. We'll be in touch soon." "Okay, Daddy. Good-night." Frank escorted her out and found his car was waiting for him after he had given the valet his ticket. Sonja climbed in, completely distracted with the night's conversations surrounding a mysterious LAPD cop. **** Steve rubbed his eyes in exhaustion and checked the time on the dashboard clock. Though he'd had calls all over the city, he consistently came back to the same spot to write them up. If anyone asked, he could say there has been a spate of burglaries in this neighborhood and he was just being proactive. Who could argue with that logic? When the Cadillac finally pulled up in front of the house after one in the morning, Steve set his work aside and watched carefully. **** "Thanks for the ride, Frank." "Where you going? Don't get out of the car yet ... unless you're inviting me in." He put his arm on the seat behind her and inched closer. "Not tonight. I'm very tired. Good night." When she moved to open the door he grabbed her hand to stop her. "Sonja, I do not understand what is wrong with you lately?" 76
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"Let go of my hand, Frank." "I will let go after you kiss me properly." "I said let go, Frank!" **** The reflections on the windshield made it impossible to see inside. But, the time it was taking for her to emerge from the car was making it clear what must be going on in the interior. **** "Not until you give me a proper kiss, Sonja! So stop resisting me and kiss me!" "I don't want to kiss you! Now, let me out before I get violent!" "Get violent? What do you mean, get violent!? You suddenly turn into a cold fish and now you say, 'get violent'?" **** When the door swung open and the inside dome light lit, Steve sat up and struggled to see from so far away. He expected the man to walk her to the door. Then, they would most likely make out on the porch. The creep would be invited in and the lights would go out. He expected it and dreaded it completely. **** She stormed up to the front door. Frank climbed out and slammed his car door and raced after her. "Good night, Frank!" Sonja shouted. 77
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"Not until you tell me what's going on, Sonja! We've been seeing each other off and on—" "Mostly off!" "Off and on..." he continued, "For some time now. And you gave me the distinct impression you were interested. Now— for Lord knows what reason, you go cold as ice. You have some explaining to do." "I don't have to explain to you! Who do you think you are? I'm telling you to go home! That's my explanation! Go!" He grabbed her arm roughly. "I don't like being spoken to like that, Sonja!" "Let go of me! I said—get your filthy nigga hands off me!" When he slapped her she gasped and stared at him in shock. In an instant Steve had Frank by the throat, pinned against the front door. As Sonja struggled to catch her breath, Steve growled, "I just witnessed you assault this woman! You're going to jail, you fucker!" "No! No, it's all right. Let him go." Sonja was visibly shaking from the fright and abruptness of the reaction. "Let him go?" Steve shouted in fury. "He just hit you! He's going to spend the night in jail!" Frank's eyes were wide in surprise. With his back against the door he appeared to be trying to figure out where Steve came from. "It's okay..." Sonja touched Steve's shoulder. "Officer, please, it's okay." With extreme reluctance, Steve backed off and let Frank go, glaring at him as if he would kill him. 78
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Frank straightened out his tuxedo and then regained his composure. "I'll sue you for harassment!" "Nice try, Frank." Sonja rolled her eyes. "You're lucky I don't allow him to arrest you. What's wrong with you? Hitting me like that? You should be ashamed of yourself! Wait till Daddy hears what you did! He'll want to have you arrested himself! Now get out of my sight!" Sneering at Steve with contempt, Frank read his name tag and spat out, "Officer Miller—I'll be looking for you. You just watch your ass now." "Likewise," Steve growled. Slipping passed him quickly, Frank went to his car and squealed the tires as he left. Taking a moment to calm down, Sonja relaxed her stiff posture and exhaled a long breath. Steve looked back at her after the car had vanished, touching her shoulder softly. "Are you all right?" "Yes. I don't know what came over him. He's never like that. He's a well respected attorney. It's just not like him." "So, now you're defending the asshole to me?" She stopped her rambling and met his eyes. "It's not what you think, baby," she whispered. "It never is." He laughed sadly. "It was this—my father was speaking at the NAACP ... Frank just took me there. That's it. I swear to you. I asked my mother to drive me home, but she said she was too tired." "And there was nothing between you? Why am I having a hard time believing that?" 79
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The door swung open and Chelsea shouted, "What's going on out here? I heard some shouting and then tires screeching! I got dressed as fast as I can—oh, hello, Officer Miller..." She batted her lashes at him flirtatiously. "Uh..." Sonja stammered, trying to find some reasonable excuse as to why he was standing where he was, and Steve knew it. "Hi. I was just patrolling the neighborhood. There has been a little spree of burglaries in this area. When I heard the shouting I came to see if Ms. Knight was all right. Now that I see she is, I'll be going." "Do you have to?" Chelsea opened the screen door, almost shoving Sonja off the front porch. "I do. Good night." "Did you get the message I called?" she shouted. When he was gone, she sighed, "Man, is he gorgeous ... you were lucky he was in the neighborhood, Sonja. Did you and Frank have a fight?" Sonja moved passed her to the living room and then went to her room to change. "What happened, Sonja?" Chelsea asked, standing at Sonja's door. She threw the feather boa on the bed and disappeared into the walk-in closet to get her pajamas on. "I said no, and he got all nasty on me." "You said no to Frank? Why? I thought you liked him." "I used to. But that ass slapped me! He slapped my face!" "He did? Ohhh, man. That's like assault or something. Did Officer Miller see that? Did he want to arrest him?" 80
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"Something like that." Sonja emerged and headed to the bathroom to wash her face. "He's like a hero ... you know, always there when you need him. Why won't he call me, Sonja?" she whined. "I don't know." She cleaned her teeth and brushed her hair, then sat on her bed and picked up the phone. "Who are you calling this late?" Sonja raised her index finger indicating to wait. "Hello, Mama? Yeah, it's me. You'll never believe what just happened. Frank slapped my face! He did! I told him I didn't want to kiss him and he slapped me! A police officer saw it and almost arrested him for assault! So, you tell Daddy what I said! You tell him Frank hit me! Yes, I'm okay, just angry. No, I convinced the officer to not arrest him. But, he shouldn't hit a woman, Mama. So, now you can stop pushing that man at me, you got that? Yeah. I will. Good night, Mama." She hung up and set the phone back on the nightstand. "What did she say?" "She said I was right. That I should keep away from him." "Wow. Now we're both single and available!" Peering up at her enthusiastic expression, Sonja nodded politely and then said, "I got to get to bed." "Okay. Good night." "Night." When she left, Sonja shut the light. Lying back, she was unable to close her eyes. **** Still furious, Steve stood at his locker at the end of shift and hung up his gun-belt. 81
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"Where'd you disappear to the end of shift?" Brian asked. "Hmmm?" "Lydia and I were in the church lot waiting for you. You never showed. Didn't you read our messages?" "Oh. No, sorry." "You okay? Did something happen to piss you off?" "Just tired." "Oh. Well, Lydia has a mean crush on you, Miller. She asked me not to say anything so don't tell her you know. She's really hot. You interested?" "Hmm? Interested?" "Man, you must be tired. You're not listening to a word I'm saying." "Sorry." Steve closed the door of his locker and found his truck keys. "See ya tomorrow, Potter." "See ya, Miller." The drive home felt long and tiresome. When Steve came through his door he didn't bother to eat or drink anything, he just stripped, washed up and got into bed. With his thoughts disturbing him, he tossed and turned, falling into a fitful sleep.
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Chapter Eight "Mom? It's me." "Hi, Steven." She unlocked the screen door and let him in. "Did you want breakfast?" "Yes. That's why I'm early. I've got nothing to eat in the house but cold cereal." "Noo ... Sunday mornings are made for a good hot breakfast. But, it has to be quick because I've got to go to church at eleven. Do you want to come?" "No." He set his gun pack down on the counter and poured himself a cup of coffee. "Man, that bacon smells good." He sniffed over the frying pan. "Where's Dad?" "I guess he's in the shower." "Is he working today?" "Yes. He's got Tuesday and Wednesday off this week." "Oh. I've got Monday and Tuesday off." Steve sat down at the table and browsed through the Sunday paper. "You do? Oh, good you can come for dinner." "Uh, I can't tomorrow, but maybe Tuesday." "Why can't you tomorrow?" "Busy." "Busy doing what?" "Just busy, Mom." "How many eggs do you want?" "Two—sunny side up." "Okay, dear." 83
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Hearing him shuffling down the hall, Steve looked up over the comic pages to see his father in his uniform coming into the kitchen. "Morning, Dad." "Morning," he mumbled and poured himself a cup from the pot. The moment he sat down Susan set a plate in front of her husband. Steve watched as he sprinkled salt on his eggs. "I asked Steve to come for dinner tomorrow because he's off, Dick, but he said he's too busy." "So?" Dick stuffed the toast and egg into his mouth as he looked for the sports pages. Susan set a plate down in front of her son. "He won't tell me what he's doing." "Maaa, leave it." Steve started chewing on a piece of bacon hungrily. "I don't know what you're doing that you can't tell us." She cracked another egg into the pan and it sizzled loudly. "I'm just seeing some friends. That's all." "Which friends?" she asked. "Christ, Dad, when did Mom get so damn nosy?" "We were discussing you last night," Dick said, some runny egg on his fingers. "Twenty-five and you don't have a damn woman in your life. What's wrong with you?" "Do you know what my shift pattern is like? Give me a break!" "If you're a friggin' faggot I'll kill you." Stopping in his tracks, Steve glared at him in anger. "Why do I come here? I must love the verbal abuse." 84
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Susan set her own plate down and moved the newspapers aside to give her some room. "Dick, don't use that language at the table." "For your information—" Steve growled, "I'm not a homosexual. All right?" "Then date someone, for cryin' out loud!" Dick shouted. "You'll get a nasty reputation around the department if you don't act like you're interested in women!" "Nasty reputation?" Steve choked in a laugh, "Look who's talking!" "What's that supposed to mean!?" Dick huffed. "All right, you two." Susan admonished them. "I would like to eat my breakfast in peace—and you both should come to church with me. They way you behave ... you're like a couple of pit bulls, you know." "I'm done." Steve stood and set his plate in the sink. "You want more, Steven?" Susan asked. "No." Dick asked over his shoulder, "You working later tonight?" "Yeah." "Sunday night, should be quiet." "Hopefully. I'm really beat ... Dad?" "Yeah?" He pushed his empty plate aside and lifted the sports page again. "Is it too early to ask for a transfer to days?" "Naaa, go and put one in." "You don't think since I've only been on less than a year they'll think I can't hack it?" 85
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"Look, nights isn't for everybody. If it's messing you up, put in a request. It don't matter when, Steve." Susan finished her meal and took both plates to the sink. "You should, dear. The hours you work aren't healthy." "Right. I'll put it in today when I get there. Thanks, Dad. And thanks, Mom for breakfast." He kissed her cheek and took his keys out of his pocket. "So, we'll see you some time over the next two days?" She walked him to the door. "I'll call. Probably Tuesday." "Okay, dear. Be careful." He picked up his gun pack and fastened it around his waist. "See ya." **** She watched him walk to his truck and then went back to the kitchen again. "Load the dishwasher, Dick, I have to get to church." "Mmm," he grumbled. "And stop teasing your son about being gay. It really upsets me when you do that." Dick set the newspaper down to look at her when he replied, "You know why I'm asking? Because gossip gets around, Suz. And the gossip I hear is that every fricken' female officer on the division is hot for him. You listening to me? And none of them can get a fricken' date with the bastard."
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"Maybe he just doesn't think it's a good idea to date where he works. It could make for a messy situation, Dick." She took off her apron and found her purse. "I'm not buyin' that. There are married couples working there, there are plenty of people finding romance. He'll soon learn that only one cop can stand another cop." Smiling sweetly at him, Susan wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered, "You know that's not true." Touching her arms gently, Dick answered, "It ain't like the old days, Suz." "Maybe, maybe not. Just let him find his own way. I'll see you tonight. Be careful, dear." "Right. Say hello to the priest for me." "See ya." **** Once Steve arrived home he forced himself to change into a running outfit and shoes and tied his key to his lacings even though he was completely exhausted. Inhaling the lukewarm air into his lungs, he raised his chin to his planned route, and picked up speed. **** Seated next to her mother on a pew, Sonja sang with the choir and loved the sound of everyone's voices rising in unison. The preacher thundered his motivational sermon, warning his congregation to fight ignorance and injustice in their community, and to live a life of goodness and faith. 87
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Feeling her hand being clasped, Sonja looked down at their white cotton gloves and then smiled at her mother as she absorbed the comforting words with tears in her eyes. Sonja patted her hand gently, smiling to herself. Leaning forward to look down the pew, her father was enrapt with the sermon as well, most likely taking heed of the speech and memorizing the noteworthy parts to use later for his volunteer work. The last song In His Presence, coming on strong, they all stood up and raised their voices to the rafters feeling the power of the words and the sensation one gets when one belongs to a strong solid organization. "Amen!" she said, kissing her mother's cheek. She reached out to the few around her to shake their hands and whisper kind words. The congregation filed out slowly. Most members lingered outdoors to catch up with neighbors and friends. Sonja found her father exchanging thoughts with the preacher, and her mother busy socializing and laughing. Knowing they would take some time to chat and enjoy the warmth of the connection they felt with the rest of the congregation, Sonja moved to the periphery, a pleasant smile on her lips. Once she had made it to the sidewalk out by the line of parked cars she tilted her head to something just outside her line of vision. As she focused in on it, she could see a muscular male in blue gym shorts and a tank top standing still, catching his breath and covered in sweat. For a moment it seemed he was the only one there. Her eyes swept over that incredible height and every sinewy 88
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muscle of his exposed legs and arms. She could almost taste his sweat. He made a move to meet her, then halted. She could tell the impulse he had to race to her and connect with her was so strong he had to physically will himself to stop. She felt the same way. She tilted her head to a direction, and he immediately made a move to the side of the church. After taking a quick glance around her, she tried to make an inconspicuous beeline to the same spot. She didn't dare look for her parents and could only pray that they were still deeply involved in their conversations. When he materialized from around the bend in the building she rushed to him. "Sonja! Oh, look at you! Oh, you are so fucking amazing! I want to hold you but I'm a sweaty mess!" He was gasping for air as he spoke. "I was stunned to see you standing there! Christ, Sonja, I was mesmerized by your beauty ... you in that pink outfit!" She adjusted her pillbox hat with lace just covering her forehead, glancing quickly at her matching pink blazer and skirt, her white silk blouse, and her pink leather shoes and purse, shyly. "What are you doing here? Officer Miller! I am getting a distinct feeling you are stalking me!" she laughed. "No! I swear! I run this same route every day!" He held up his hand and crossed his fingers over his chest. "God, you're beautiful ... Kiss me." She looked around quickly, then pecked his lips. "My parents are here. I can't hide with you for long." 89
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"We're still on for tomorrow, right? After work you'll come straight to my place?" "Yes." She took off her cotton glove and smoothed her hand down his rounded deltoid. "Oh, Christ ... now I have to run with a hard-on..." He laughed and pointed to his crotch. She smoothed her hand over it, smiling wickedly at him. **** "Where's Sonja?" Leticia asked Harold. "She was standing by the curb only a minute ago." "She must be around. Maybe she met someone she knows. Have a look for her." "Excuse me, have you seen my daughter anywhere?" "I thought I saw her go around the back of the church, Leticia. I don't know what she was doing." "Around—? Thank you..." **** "I should be getting back. My parents will be wondering what happened to me." "Okay, Sonja ... I'll see you tomorrow night, then, right?" "I won't let you down! Now go!" He pecked her lips. "Sonja!" She heard her mother. Watching him vanish behind the shrubbery, Sonja closed her eyes and had no idea if her mother had seen the kiss or not. Slowly, she turned around and found her approaching. "Who was that?" 90
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"Who was who?" "That white man I saw running that way?" She pointed. "What white man? You mean the jogger?" "I don't know! Were you talking to him just now?" "Did you see me talking to him?" "Oh, you have become impossible, child!" Leticia grabbed her hand and started bringing her to the front of the church where her father was waiting. "Can't you answer a simple question?" "Obviously not!" Sonja laughed. When Harold spotted them he waved and found his car keys. "Where were you, Sonja?" Leticia answered for her, "She was standing on the side of the church talking to some white man." "Some white man?" Harold unlocked the car door for them. "Who were you talking to?" "He was just some guy jogging by, Daddy. He asked me for directions. I don't know why Mama has to make up all sorts of stories for you." She got into the back seat. After Leticia climbed into the front passenger seat she sighed, "You could have told me that when I asked! I swear, Harold, she's getting so smart-lipped." Harold started the car and looked into the rear view mirror at his daughter. One of her gloves was removed and she was touching her finger to her tongue lightly. "Just some jogger, huh?" he asked skeptically. Instead of answering, she gazed out of the window and savored the taste of his sweat on her lips. **** 91
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Back in his uniform and behind the wheel of a patrol car, Steve counted the hours until the shift was over and he could have two days off and see Sonja. He had typed up his transfer request and given it to his sergeant, hoping against all odds that he could move without too much of a wait. Where they would move him was another story. He knew he wouldn't be in Sonja's district any longer, but it was a trade off and his sanity was at stake. When he pulled into the parking lot at Juniper Drive he found two patrol cars already there. Smiling at them for discovering his hiding place for writing up reports, he pulled up next to one and found Brian window to window with Lydia. Brian's passenger window lowered and his pudgy face was seen. "Hey, Miller." "Hey, Potter. I just handed the sarge my transfer request." Having heard him, Lydia shouted, "No! You're not leaving us!" "Afraid so. I can't take these hours. I'm a basket case!" "I don't mind them," Brian said, "The wife watches the kid at night, and I watch him during the day. It beats the hell out of the cost of daycare." "You've got a wife?" Steve gasped comically. "What woman would put up with you, Potter?" "Funny, Miller. You're just jealous because I found someone. He's a lonely bastard, Brown." "I find that hard to believe." Lydia pouted. "Don't leave us!" 92
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"Well, it may take a while. You know how it goes around here. The rookie's requests are put on the back burner," Steve said. "I can't believe you want to leave the squad," Lydia moaned. "You got it bad for Miller, don't you, Brown?" Brian teased her. "Oh, take her on a date, will ya, Miller?" "Shh ... hang on." Steve held up his hand and listened to the radio. "Isn't there someone to back him up?" "Who?" Brian asked. "7 Lincoln 33—Officer Johnson. He's calling for a back up and no one is answering." Steve picked up the mike. "It's not our district, Miller!" Brian shouted. "9 Lincoln 59—I can back—" Steve told the radio dispatcher. She advised the requesting unit, and Steve flipped his lights on and went flying out of the lot. **** When Steve was gone, Brian sneered at Lydia, "What the hell's wrong with him? Can you imagine racing all the way across the damn city to Wilshire just for Johnson?" Frowning at him in annoyance, Lydia replied, "You can really be an asshole, Brian. I don't know why we put up with you." **** Steve flew through the vacant streets and asked the dispatcher for a status check. He heard it was still under 93
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control but to continue heading there. As he arrived he advised radio and pulled up behind Isaac to see he had a very suspicious traffic stop. Isaac glanced back at Steve who was walking up to the passenger door as he leaned near the driver's side talking to the occupant. Steve shined his flashlight at the lap of the passenger, then checked the back seat. Only two men were in the car. Seeing the man's hands clearly on his lap, Steve tried to listen to Isaac as he asked the driver questions. Isaac told Steve over the roof of the car, "Get them out." Steve nodded and slipped his flashlight into his belt ring. He opened the door and ordered the man out. Once he was standing, Steve pushed him face down against the car and patted him down for weapons quickly, then shut the car door and asked him for his name and birthday as Isaac did the same to the other man. A third unit pulled up behind Steve's car and another black policeman stepped out to assist them. As the patrol vehicles' flashing lights spread red, white, and blue colors on the surroundings, the dispatcher advised the three units in code that they had two men with aliases for outstanding warrants for their arrest for homicide. Immediately Steve twisted the man's back to him and cuffed him up as Isaac did the same. "Put him in my car," the black officer said to Steve. "You sure?" "Yes. This is our division."
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"Okay." Steve waited as this officer patted the man down again, then they shoved him into the back seat of the car and locked it. Isaac came back to them after he had done the same. "Thanks, Miller ... where the hell were you, Jess? I needed a quick back up here!" "I was tied up or you know I would be here!" Jessie defended. "Let me look inside the car." Steve let them argue it out in private and slipped his gloves on, then took his flashlight out of his belt ring again. He opened the door and shined it on the floor of the passenger seat. "Holy fuck." "What?" Isaac came hurrying over. "Check it out." Steve illuminated the floor. Sticking out from under the seat was the butt of a pistol and a large plastic bag containing white packages. Steve began pulling it out and a bloody knife appeared stuck to the plastic bag. "Time to call the sarge." "You got it." Isaac got on the radio and asked for the supervisor to respond. When Jessie came over to Steve he looked in and then opened the back door. He started digging around. "More weapons and some bloody clothing." "Nice one, Isaac!" Steve shouted to him when he was through with the radio request. "Good snag!" Coming over to take another look, Isaac shook his head. "Holy shit. Thanks for coming to back me, Miller. I had no idea what I had but I knew it was hinky." "No problem. That's what we're all here for." 95
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Jessie took a closer look at him. "Not all of us." "Look," Steve whispered, "As far as I'm concerned we're all in blue—that's the only fucking color I can see. You know most of us feel that way." "I know," Isaac said softly, "But how long did it take for someone to answer up for my request?" "It's just the crossing of divisions, Isaac." "Bull shit," he said. Another patrol car pulled up and their African American sergeant stepped out. First he looked inside the two patrol cars at the suspects while putting his hat on his shaved head, then he walked over to where they were standing. Sgt. Casey looked at Steve first curiously, then asked Isaac, "What have we got?" "Looks like evidence of a homicide, Sarge. Bloody knife, clothing, dope, I don't know what else. We just wanted to wait for you before we started pulling the car apart." He looked at all the items on the floor of the car and nodded, then took out his cell phone. "Let me call homicide and see what they want us to do." "Right." Isaac nodded. "Go ahead and clear, Steve. Get back to your district." "You're joking? You know the amount of paperwork you've got ahead? Let me help." "We got it," Jessie assured him. Steve checked again with Isaac and got his nod. "All right ... if you're sure." Isaac held out his hand. "Thanks for the back up." "Anytime, man, anytime." Steve smiled as he shook it. 96
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Steve noticed Sgt. Casey observing the interaction as he spoke on the phone, then he stepped back to their group. "Homicide wants you to impound it. Don't touch it. Just take the suspects back and book them on the warrants." "See?" Isaac smiled. "Not as much paper as you thought!" Steve grinned at him and waved. "See ya." **** As he left to get into his car, Sgt. Casey watched him leave. "Where'd he come from?" "Way the hell across town," Isaac said as he watched him pull into traffic. "You know Dick Miller?" "Yeah. I know the racist son-of-a bitch, why?" "That's his son." Isaac laughed. "You're shitting me." The sergeant exchanged puzzled looks with him then said, "Well, at least he takes after his mother's side of the family!" Sgt. Casey laughed, then shouted back to Jessie who was making sure the prisoners were still contained, "All right, Jess, order an impound!" "Right, Sarge!" **** On his way back to his own area, Steve listened to see if any of the calls that were being dispatched were meant for him. Hearing nothing of interest, he headed back to the church lot and found one car still there. He pulled next to it and was glad it was Lydia. When he put the car into park, he cleared the call and became available again. 97
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"So? A whole lot of nothing and you raced over there for no reason?" she asked. "On the contrary!" Steve laughed. "He was damn lucky he wasn't hurt! He had two homicide warrant suspects, a car full of weapons, dope, and bloody clothing! I'm very glad I went. I would hate to tackle that one alone!" "Oh! Those warrants were his?! Man, that is scary. You were really a good guy to go all the way out there." "I would hope someone would do it for me if I was requesting a back up." "I would!" "Thanks, Lydia." "You still 'sort of' have a girlfriend?" "Yes ... and getting more like a real girlfriend everyday." He smiled sweetly. "Wow, lucky girl. Is she a cop?" "Nope." "Uh oh, they're calling me. I gotta go. Catch you later." "Bye." Steve waved, checked the time, and was glad it was nearing the end of the shift and the week. **** Finally heading back to the locker room, Steve was surprised to see Isaac and Jessie already in it and changing. "Wow, you guys got off easy!" Isaac smiled. "I told you! Just a quick report and an impound. Homicide has all the inventorying! But, thanks again, Steve, for coming to back me up." "No problem. It was a great arrest." 98
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"Just luck." "Stop being so modest!" Jessie burst out laughing, "Modest? Isaac? Man, you've got him pegged wrong!" "Do I?" Steve smiled, hanging his gun belt in the locker. "He's got the biggest ego on the division!" Jessie shoved Isaac playfully. "Hey, hey ... careful with the merchandise." Isaac buttoned his shirt and tucked it into his jeans. "Steve, we're going out for a quick beer. You want to join us?" "Sure!" He zipped up his denims and bent down to tie his shoes. "All right, man, meet you out in the parking lot." Steve nodded as they passed. He finished getting dressed, shut his locker door with a slam, and walked out. **** Brian was changing at his locker and had heard the entire conversation sneering to himself as Steve disappeared out of the room. **** As he walked across the lot to where the men were standing, he felt someone nudge him with their shoulder. Lydia was in her street clothing and her hair was out of its usual clip and hanging down on her shoulders. "Hey, hot stuff, going my way?" "Hey, Lydia ... you look different without the uniform." "Oh? Tempted?" She batted her eyelashes at him. 99
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"Sorely." He winked. They both came up to Jessie and Isaac in the parking lot. "We're just going down to Mo's dinner. It's the only thing open that serves alcohol at this hour..." Isaac said. "Whatever. I don't mind." "You going out for a beer?" Lydia asked in excitement. "You want to join us?" Jessie asked. "You mind?" she answered. "No! Not at all!" Jessie smiled. "Cool! I'll follow you." She ran to her car. Isaac leaned on Steve to whisper, "I didn't think to ask. You mind if she joins us?" "No, not at all, Isaac." "I just didn't know if she was being a pest, you know." "Naa, she's all right. A nice girl really." "Oh?" Jessie smiled. "Not like that—no. I've got someone else for that." He grinned wickedly. "We'll have to hear all about her then, won't we, Isaac?" Jessie opened his car door. "Oh, yes," Isaac laughed. "See you there." Steve nodded and climbed into his truck wondering if telling them about Sonja was a good idea. **** Opening her eyes, Sonja checked her digital clock and found it read just after two AM. She fluffed up her pillow and tried to close her eyes again but a stream of thoughts began to race through her mind. Right before she had gone to sleep 100
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she debated with herself about telling her father about Steve. Thinking of ways to make it sound wholesome and wonderful, she hashed out scenarios in her head as if she were writing a closing argument. He was a kind-hearted man. He would understand. She couldn't keep sneaking around. It was wearing her down and made it all seem so sordid. So, once again, awakened by something unknown in the night, she had all those nagging thoughts going through her mind. She decided to have lunch with him. Sonja knew she had court early in the morning and cursed herself for not getting back to sleep easily. **** "Another beer, Isaac?" "All right, Steve, one more. Then I got to get home to the Mrs." "Jessie? Lydia?" "No, I'm good." Jessie showed him his half full beer, and Lydia shook her head no. He signaled the waiter and two more were brought to the table. He set one before Isaac, then he claimed the second one. "I'm a little buzzed," Lydia said, "Maybe I should be drinking coffee." "Then you won't get to sleep." Steve smiled at her. "Oh, right." "Eat something." Isaac pushed a basket of bread towards her. 101
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She took a slice and munched on it. "You're being very quiet about this mystery woman, Steve." Jessie smiled and checked Lydia for her jealous reaction. "It's just too new," he said, trying to downplay it for the female cop's sake. "Where did you meet?" Isaac asked, sipping his fresh beer. "Uh, can we change the subject?" He peeked over at Lydia's pout. "You think he's cute, don't you?" Jessie nudged Lydia. She straightened her back and sat up. "Huh?" "You heard me!" He laughed at her expression. "Stop teasing her, Jessie." Steve shook his head at him that it wasn't nice. "Yeah, change the subject or I'll have to put some country and western music on the jukebox to mend my achy-breakyheart!" she whined comically. "Uh! No country and western, please!" Isaac held up his hand. "Good! Then stop joking about it!" She made a silly face at him. "Oh, I am so beat." Steve rubbed his face wearily. "You get used to it." Isaac stifled a yawn. "I thought I would, but I can't. I just think some people aren't cut out for nights." "I like having my days free for my kids." Jessie ate some bread. "That's what Brian Potter says. He said it's better than paying for daycare." 102
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When he dropped that name both men exchanged looks. Steve caught it. "What?" "Potter," Jessie sneered in annoyance. "That fat lazy useless pile of white horse shit." Laughing at him, Steve replied, "Don't hold back, Jessie. Say what you really feel!" "Wow," Lydia, said, "You guys really hate him that much?" They exchanged looks again first, then Isaac said, "Let's just say he's not our favorite cop." Jessie choked in a laugh at the understated comment. "Is he that bad?" Steve asked seriously. "Look," Isaac said, "You form your own opinion of him. But, let's just say when we heard you talking to him in the locker room we automatically thought you were some closet member of the KKK." "Oh, come on." Steve laughed softly. When the men exchanged glances again Steve said, "Aren't you exaggerating a bit? Yes, he's ignorant but he's not a white-hooded racist." "Like we said, you have your own opinion." Jessie nudged the bread bowl back to Lydia and she chewed on another piece. That set him back to ponder. "Then..." Steve tried to find the courage to ask the question on his mind. "Then what do you think about Sgt. Dick Miller?" Jessie burst out laughing, then Isaac elbowed him and said, "That's his father." Immediately Jessie stopped laughing. "Oh, Lordy..." he said sadly. 103
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Without thinking, Steve mumbled, "Christ, I am so fucked." Isaac tilted his head curiously. "Why? Why do you say that? You're nothing like him, man." "No. Not that. Just that this woman I really like—" "Uh oh." Jessie shook his head. "You're joking." Lydia leaned closer, a puzzled expression on her exhausted face. "No, I'm not." Steve stared directly into Jessie's eyes. Isaac sat back and whistled through his teeth. "You better wear your bullet proof vest all the time." Steve clenched his jaw, finishing his beer, staring from one sympathetic gaze to the other. Finally Lydia said, "What the hell are you guys talking about?" "Nothing you need to worry your pretty little head about." Isaac smiled. "I've got to go and get home." At the announcement they all stood up tiredly and made their way to the parking lot after paying the check. Lydia and Steve waved to Isaac and Jessie as they climbed into their cars. She leaned on him and asked, "Kiss goodnight?" He smiled as he looked down at her. "Are you okay to drive? Last thing you need is a DWI on your record." "Yeah. I'm fine. I don't live very far from here. So, no kiss then?" "On the cheek?" "Okay." She offered her face. 104
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He pecked it, waving to her as he climbed into his truck. On the way home he thought about what Jessie and Isaac had implied about his father, and it did not make him happy.
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Chapter Nine Sonja looked through her morning schedule quickly, then opened up a compact she had in her purse and re-applied her lipstick as she sat at her desk. At a knock on her door she shouted, "Come in!" "Sonja?" "Yes, Yvonne?" "There's someone here to see you." "What's it about?" She put her paperwork back into her briefcase. "I'm not sure, but I think it has to do with the gang shooting the other week." She nodded and followed her out of the room quickly. Two older women were waiting for her. "Can I help you?" "Yes ... is there someplace private where we can talk?" Sonja invited the women into a conference room and waited until they sat down at the table. She closed the door and asked, "Can I get you anything?" "No, thank you," one said sweetly, obviously the more outgoing of the two. She sat down, leaning her elbows on the table. "Our sons were involved in last Thursday's incident ... you know the one? Near that nightclub?" Sonja nodded. "Well, word around is that you're the one to call to get them off the hook. I know my Terrance ain't no gang member. He swears to me he's been framed. And I believe 106
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him. He's a good boy, Ms. Knight. He couldn't have killed either of those two boys." "And the same for you?" she asked the silent woman. She nodded, not answering verbally. "I take it they're still in the county jail at the moment." "Yes. The judge refused them bail. I hate to think of my boy rotting in that prison." "Has he ever been in prison before?" "Oh, well, yes, but for silly things." "Like?" "Well, he got arrested for assault a few times, and he stole a car, but I still think they got it wrong. He just hangs around with the wrong crowd." Nodding, knowing Terrance most likely had a rap sheet as long as the table, she tried to be reassuring. The silent woman finally spoke up, "I blame the LAPD. They just want to make an arrest and our boys were picked out at random. They don't care about the truth. They just need an arrest." Never before had she flinched at the police being slammed. "Let me go and see your sons and find out what they have to say, okay?" "Then you'll help us?" the first woman asked. "We don't have much money, but those public defenders—they don't give a monkey's ass who goes to jail and who don't. We'll find some way to pay you ... we will." "Let's worry about that later. The important thing is for your sons to get proper representation." 107
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The women exchanged satisfied looks. "If anyone can get our boys back on the streets, it's you, Ms. Knight." Knowing that was supposed to be a compliment, Sonja tried not to cringe. **** Steve woke up early and got his run out of the way. Next he scrubbed the house, changed the sheets and went shopping for some fine food and wine. Coming back with grocery bags filled with treats, he set things into cupboards and the refrigerator, and then hurried back out again to buy some new clothes. **** At five-thirty PM Steve's intercom buzzer sounded. He jumped out of the chair and hit the button. "Yes?" "Stevie?" "Oh, crap, Laura?" "Yeah, is it a bad time? Mom said you were off and I just got out of work and was hoping we could go out for a meal." "Shit, Laura—I have plans." "Ah, can we talk face to face? I feel weird having this chat with you over the intercom." "I'll come down." "Come down? Why can't I come up?" she asked and waited. He cursed and raced around looking for his shoes and keys, then sprinted down the stairs rechecking the time on his watch. 108
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With her arms crossed over her chest in irritation, Laura glared at him. "Why the hell didn't you just buzz me to come up? I don't want to talk in the damn lobby." "Look, I'm expecting someone and I just don't want you around when she comes." "She?" She grinned wickedly. "Yes! Now, be a good sister and get lost!" "I want to meet her!" "No!" "Why not? Oh, Steve, come on. I won't embarrass you or talk about you when you were little or anything. Please, please, please?" she begged comically. "No! No offense, Laura, but I'd rather you didn't meet her yet." "Why not?" "It's still too new. I don't want to overwhelm her with my family!" "I'm not family! I'm just your sister!" Steve just spotted Sonja parking her car on the street in front of the building. With a bottle of red wine in her hand, she was busy tucking her keys into her purse. He wondered what she would do when she noticed them standing in the lobby. She hopped up the two cement stairs and stopped short. Laura spun around. "Oh—my—god—" "Shut up, Laura, I mean it." He rushed to the door and opened it. "Hello, Sonja. Come in. This is my sister, Laura." "Hello, Laura, I recognize you from a photo Steve has in his apartment. Nice to meet you." 109
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"And nice to meet you!" Laura held out her hand. "Right. Bye, sis." Steve nudged her to the door. "Bye!" Her smile was pasted on as she waved and stumbled out the door. Steve wrapped around Sonja's waist possessively, keeping his back to his sister, and pushed the elevator button. They rode up to his floor in silence. He moved passed her and unlocked his door, allowing her to enter first, then shut it behind him. "Sorry about that. I had no idea she was stopping by unannounced." "Is the cat out of the bag now?" Sonja set her purse down, giving him the bottle of wine. "Oh, thanks. Uh, only to her, I think. You want a glass of this now?" He gestured to the bottle. "Sure ... so, am I a secret to the rest of the family?" She followed him to the kitchen and looked at the table. It was decked out with romantic flowers and candlesticks. Preoccupied, he didn't answer as he screwed the opener into the cork. Steve convinced himself Laura would not tell their parents about it. If she did, he'd kill her and she knew it. He popped the cork out and poured two stemmed glasses, when he spun around to hold one out to her, he suddenly remembered just exactly who was standing in his kitchen. Before she took the glass, he set it back on the counter next to the bottle and wrapped around her slowly, bringing her body to rest against his, then went for her lips. He felt her let go as if the toils of her day had completely melted from her shoulders. 110
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Sonja sighed in pleasure and dug her hands through his thick sandy brown hair. Mesmerized by her hypnotic charms, Steve lost himself on her lovely perfume and softness. Gently cupping behind her head with one hand and her narrow waist with the other, he swayed in a delicate waltz, moving her one step at a time to his bedroom. Imagining music in their heads, they kept the tempo going; their lips occupied. "Oh, Steve, I've missed you, missed touching your hair and face," she purred. Candles were lit all over his bedroom and rose petals were scattered on the bedspread. He coaxed her to lay back on it with him, resting on his elbow to stare down at her. With his index finger he traced the line of her forehead, down her nose to her lips, stroking them softly. She opened her mouth, urging his finger into it to suck. Instantly he reacted to the seduction and writhed on the bed. She began kissing his hand tenderly, reaching to unbutton his shirt. And it was that luscious slowness that was driving him mad. With both hands she spread his shirt wide across his chest, kissing his tiny erect nipples. He hissed an intake of air between his teeth and pumped his hips hungrily. Moving down his body to his black slacks, she opened the button, then the zipper, and parted the sides to stare at the line of hair on his pelvis and the very top of his pubic hair. 111
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"Look at you..." she whispered seductively. "So pretty, pretty, pretty..." she crooned. His head spinning, he lay back and stared at her, wanting her, forcing himself to go at her pace and not ravish her. Smoothing her long fingers and painted pink nails across his rippled chest and down to the dark pubic hair of his crotch, she gazed at him as if she were just enjoying the moment. Unable to hold back any longer, he spun them around so he was leaning over her, allowing her to rest back on the pillows. It was his turn to open her shirt. Watching, she kept peeking down at his hand, then up at the expression on his face. As the top parted he caught a glimpse of her black lace bra. Moaning a soft sensual sound of yearning, he used a rose petal to lightly touch those two velvety mounds of flesh. As if allowing him his turn to play, she relaxed and stared at him, a loving smile on her lips. Finally he looked into her face and when he did his eyes filled with tears. "Make love to me, Sonja." "Oh, my precious baby." She melted, cupping his face with her hands, bringing him to her lips. As they kissed he wrapped around her and rolled over, setting her on top of him again. She began shoving his shirt off his arms and then his slacks down his thighs. Raising his hips, he helped her to get him naked and then removed her top cupping her breasts over that enticing bra. She leaned over his face loosening one of the straps and set one of her breasts free from its confines. He went for it with both hands 112
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and closed his eyes tightly as he suckled it. She reached down between his legs and stroked his cock until he was gasping for breath. Taking the rest of her clothing off quickly, she found a condom had been laid out on the nightstand and reached for it. He was trying to be patient, panting and watching every move she made. Rolling it on him gently, she smiled as she sat up, then impaled him between her legs. They gasped in delight. Gritting his teeth, he held back his orgasm and felt her pumping and grinding on him, her hands bracing her upright over his chest. He kept his eyes closed because just the sight of her would make him come instantly. She opened her mouth and gasped in bliss. The minute he heard her, feeling her body shudder around his cock his eyes blinked open. Instantly he reached up to cup her breasts in his hands, pumping up into her tight body. His jaw clenched and his eyes shut tight, then he opened his lips to whimper in deep masculine grunts that sent her into a chorus of moans. When she collapsed on top of him, he caught his breath and felt a lovely perspiration coating wherever their skin connected. As his grip tightened around her back, he whispered, "I love you. I love you so much." He felt her set back to look at his face. When she did she smiled down at his timid expression. "I love you, too, Officer Miller." At those comforting words, tears ran down the sides of his face. He embraced her tightly, like he would never let her go. **** 113
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Even though her own sentiments frightened her to death, she loved that strangle hold he had on her, felt safe and secure in its grasp, and suddenly it didn't matter if the world thought they were crazy. All that mattered was the way they felt. Let the rest be damned. **** Her head resting in the crook of his shoulder, they both stared at the ceiling as they cuddled, knowing they had time later to eat and drink. Steve gently caressed the warm skin of her arm, tickling his fingers up and down it. "Penny for your thoughts?" She laughed softly. "Well?" "Just feeling happy and content." "Ohhh ... I like that. Me, too. I wish we could always be together like this, Sonja." "It would be nice. But, life is very complicated, Steve." "Yes. I know." She rolled over to face him, pushing her long hair back over her shoulder. "I want to tell my parents about us." "But?" "But—I'm afraid of what their reaction will be." "Believe me. I understand." "What do you think Laura thinks about us?" "Laura? Laura isn't the problem. And to be honest, I think I can even manage my mom." "Right. It's your dad, then." 114
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Rubbing his face with his free hand, Steve groaned, "He's just such an ignorant bastard, Sonja. He'd really go ballistic over us." "Funny." "No. Not funny at all." "No. I didn't mean that. Just that I think my dad will be okay, and my mother will be the one to go 'ballistic'." "Really?" "Yes. Really. I was thinking last night I should just go out to lunch with him and drop it on him." "And you don't think he'll get upset?" "He might. But, he respects me and I think if he knows how serious we are, he'd understand." "If he does, you're very lucky." "It's not even that you're white, Steve. I think the LAPD thing will be more upsetting to him. He's an important member of the NAACP and heads the legal defense fund. The LAPD has been a real bane to the community. I think that will upset him more, than say, if you were just some lawyer or businessman." "Do you have to tell him? Can't you say I'm in construction or something?" "No. If I tell him about you, it's going to be the whole story. What's the use telling him partial truths?" "What the hell am I going to do about my dad?" Steve asked. "You know the black officers I work with can't stand him?" "Ouch." "Exactly." 115
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"How do they even know him?" "Did I mention he was a sergeant?" "No. Great—a mad honky sergeant with a gun—just what we need!" "Augh ... don't remind me. I really have no idea what he would do. On one hand I think Mom can convince him to just leave me alone. On the other, I envision him gunning me down in rage. He kept thinking I was gay because I didn't ask any of my female co-workers out. You should have seen the veins in his neck protrude when that lovely image filled his pea brain." "Gay? You? Man, he's got real problems! How did he ever think you were gay?" "I don't know. I don't ask what goes on in his warped mind." In the silence that followed, Sonja rested her head on his chest and closed her eyes. "Oh, there is one more thing." "What's that?" "Uh ... promise you won't be mad?" "Uh oh..." "Promise?" "Does it have to do with that asshole who slapped you?" "Who? Frank? Oh, hell no! He's history! I won't ever see someone who slaps me! You don't ever have to worry about that!" "Good. What then?" She leaned up again so they could meet eyes. "You know that shooting you had last Thursday?" "Yes ... the one where two gang members ... oh no..." 116
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"Yes. Their mamas came to my office yesterday." "No. You didn't say you would take the case!" "I did! Steve, it's such high profile—" "Sonja! They were caught red-handed! There were so many witnesses there can't possibly be any mistake!" "From what I read, mostly white witnesses," she said. He sat up and looked at her. "If you get those guys out of jail they will kill again. They get off on it, Sonja! And one of them has an assault on a cop on his rap sheet! He shot a cop, Sonja!" "Don't you yell at me!" "I'm not yelling at you, I'm just yelling because it upsets me." "You are yelling at me! I'm the only one here and you are yelling!" He kicked off the sheets and got out of bed. "We need to stop talking about it." "What are you doing?" "Getting dressed. Come on. I need some food." "You promised me you wouldn't get mad!" "No. I didn't!" She found her clothing on the floor and began dressing. "Yes, you did!" "I don't remember saying, 'I promise'!" "You implied it!" He started laughing, unable to help himself and she did as well. When they were almost fully dressed he softened up and wrapped his arms around her. "They'll be found guilty anyway." He kissed her nose. 117
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"Not if I can help it." "You won't be able to help it." "We shall see." **** Back in bed after the meal, Steve wrapped around her from behind, playing with her breasts gently. A metallic noise of a mobile ring tone was heard from far away. Sonja opened her eyes wearily and cursed under her breath. "Let them leave a message," Steve said. "Let me just see if it's my parents." Steve released her and she got off the bed and dug through her purse. "Hello? What do you want, Chelsea? Oh, sorry, I should have said something ... Frank's? Use your thick blonde head, will you? Frank's!?" Steve smiled to himself. "I'm at a friend's. Look, Chel, I'll be home in the morning early to change and go to work. Let me get back to sleep. I'm exhausted. Good night, girl." She hung up and shook her head, stuffing the phone back into her purse. Steve lifted up the covers for her to climb back underneath. "Where were we?" he mumbled tiredly. Sonja snuggled back against him, and his hand immediately went back to her breasts. Sighing tiredly, she closed her eyes saying, "I'm going to have to tell her about us eventually." "Tell her. I don't give a shit about Chelsea." "You don't have to live with her!" She snorted sarcastically. 118
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"Neither do you." Steve pushed his hips against her bottom. Smiling to herself, she replied, "You do move fast, Officer Miller." "Code 3." "Code 3 ... you are one funny cop ... code 3." Nuzzling the back of her neck as he squeezed her nipple, Steve felt the fire once again in his hips and began pushing his hard cock against her bottom. "You knocking at my door?" "Can I slide in?" "What's the magic word?" "I love you?" "That'll work." She opened her thighs for him. He reached for a rubber quickly and rolled it on, then pushed in from behind and groaned. "I just want to be in you ... all the time." "Oh, you say all the right things." He found her breasts again and kissed the back of her neck and hair as he pumped. Enjoying the closeness, he heard her sigh happily and moved his left hand down to her pubic hair. As he thrust slowly from behind he found her clit and began stimulating it with his hand. "That's it, baby," she hummed, then cupped his hand with her own, helping him along. When he felt her stiffen up in a climax he waited until she caught her breath, then slowly urged her to her hands and knees. She knelt up and wiggled her bottom for him. He whimpered in delight and wrapped around her from behind 119
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once again fondling her breasts as they dangled down. In moments he was coming and shivering from head to toe. Setting back to look at the contact he hissed in a breath of pleasure and got a good eyeful. "You enjoying yourself?" she asked. "Immensely. Christ, you are so fantastic, no matter which direction I look!" "Now pull that big dick out of me so I can get some proper rest! Some of us have work tomorrow!" He chuckled to himself and disengaged his hips from hers, then went to the bathroom to dispose of the rubber and wash up. When he came back she was smiling at him contentedly. Savoring that wonderful expression, Steve crawled between the covers, cuddling Sonja warmly. "Thank you." "No!" she laughed, "Thank you! I haven't been this satisfied since Chelsea told me about the damn Rabbit." "The what?" "Never mind. Let me sleep. You set the alarm?" He double checked it. "Yes." "Good-night, Steve." "Good-night, my love." He kissed her cheek and snuggled up to her. For the first time in many weeks, he slept like a baby.
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Chapter Ten "Stevie?" "Yes, Laura?" "Tallllk to meeeee..." she sang teasingly. Sitting on his couch in the living room watching the news, Steve held the phone to his ear and sang back, "Talk to youuu about wha-attt?" "Aboutttt Sonnnnnjaaaa..." "Only if youuuu stoppppp singgggingggg..." "Okay. Tell me all about her." "I met her in the courthouse. She's a lawyer." "Oh. Man, is she slumming it with you or what?" "Shut up." "So, you really have it bad for her?" "I do, Laura. Real bad." "She's so pretty!" "I know." "You going to tell Mom?" "I want to. It's just Dad I'm afraid of." "Well, at least he'll know you're not gay." "Ha-Ha." "What do you think he'll do when he finds out?" "I don't know. Kill me?" "That's not funny, Stevie." "You think I'm laughing? I'm serious, Laura. He's such a fricken' racist." "He won't kill you. He'll be angry, but that's all." 121
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"I don't know what to do." "You want me to ask Mom?" "No!" "You sure? I can put it to her hypothetically." He thought about it as he stared at the television. "Stevie?" "Let me tell her." "When? Are you coming for dinner tonight?" "I don't know. It depends on Sonja. I was hoping we'd see each other again tonight." "Oh. Well, Mom is under the impression you're seeing them tonight." "Shit." "What do you want me to do?" "Nothing. Stay well clear of this, Laura. If it gets ugly there's no reason for you to be part of the fall out." "I don't mind. I want to support you." "Thanks. Look, let me call Sonja and see what her plans are. She wasn't able to commit until she knew what her work load was going to be. She said she may work really late on a new case." "Okay." "I'll speak to her, then I'll call Mom. So, you're off the hook." "Well, if I don't see you tonight for dinner, have fun with Sonja." "I will. See ya." "See ya." 122
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He disconnected the phone, put the television on mute, checked the time, found it was only ten am, and dialed Sonja's mobile phone. "Hi, handsome," she purred. "Hiya, doll. Where are you?" "Just leaving the courthouse and headed back to my office." "Are we on for tonight? Let me buy you dinner." "I think I can squeeze you in," she said. "I know what I want to squeeze," he breathed. "Down, boy!" "What time should I make reservations for?" "Uh ... how about seven, just to be sure." "Fine." "I've arranged to have lunch with my dad." "Did you?" "Yes." "I was going to do the same with my mom today. Laura just phoned and she said they are expecting me later on. I never said I was going there for dinner. Or at least I don't remember saying it." "Well, I'll wish us both luck then." "Yes, good luck. Don't let him abuse you." "Dad's not like that." "Good ... I love you, Sonja." "And I love you, too, hot stuff." "You sure you don't mind coming here? I can pick you up at home." 123
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"No. I don't want the complication of Chelsea at the moment. I'll stay at yours." "Overnight again? How lucky can a man get?" "Very lucky if he's a good boy!" "I'm a very good boy!" "Oh, I'll say, sugar! Okay, let me go. See you around five thirty-ish." "Okay, call if you're late." "I will. Bye, babe." "Bye, Sonja." Steve took a deep breath and called his parents' house. "Mom?" "Hello, Steven. What time are you coming for dinner?" "Uh, I want to talk to you about that." "Oh? Why?" "Let me take you to lunch." "Lunch? You want us to go to lunch with you?" "No, not both of you." "What about your father?" "No. Just you." "What's going on, Steven?" "Mom, indulge me." "Fine." She sighed in irritation. "Meet me at the deli on High Street. Noon." "Fine. I hope you're not in any trouble, Steven." "I'm not, Mom. I just want to talk to you." "What should I tell your father?" "Shit, I forgot he's off today. Tell him you have shopping to do." "You're making this sound very mysterious, Steven." 124
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"Mom..." he sighed tiredly. "Okay. Noon at the deli." "See you there." He hung up and stared at the television without seeing it. **** Sonja waved to her father as he sat at a table and looked around the restaurant for her. He acknowledged her and kissed her cheek, then sat down and laid the cloth napkin on his lap. "What's the occasion, Sonja? We haven't had lunch together in ages." He thanked the waiter for the menu. "I just miss our chats, Daddy." She sipped water from a glass that was set for them on the table and waited for him to choose a meal. Neither of them had time to waste. "Did you decide, Sonja?" "I did." "You order first then." She nodded and looked up at the waiter. "I would like the cracked crab salad, please." Harold rubbed his chin as he decided. "The steak, medium, and a baked potato." "Thank you." The waiter took the menus. "Anything to drink?" "I'll just have some more of that water for now." He poured Harold another glass full from the mineral water bottle that was in the center of the table and then set it down and left.
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Sonja watched as her father sipped from the glass and seemed to unwind from his busy morning. "I got a new case, Daddy." "Which one?" "I'm defending two of the boys from that gang shooting last week." His mouth tightening to a grim line, nodding. "I'm sure you'll get plenty of good publicity, Sonja." "Yes. That's why I took it. Carl's going to second chair." She sipped her water looking around the room at the clientele all dressed in business suits and tailored outfits. In the silence that followed, Harold stared at her. "There's something else on your mind. Why don't you just tell me what's going on?" Smiling sweetly at him, she set her glass down and whispered, "I can never hide anything from you, can I, Daddy?" "I should hope not." "There is something. Something I really want to talk to you about." "I'm listening." "I'm seeing someone, Daddy." He nodded, waiting. "He ... he's really wonderful and I'm very fond of him. His handsome, clever, and I know he is very fond of me as well." "Who is this man, Sonja?" Judging by the look on his face, she knew he was expecting the worst, particularly after the rumors from Frank. "He's ... he's..." 126
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"Here is your steak, sir. And the salad for you." The waiter set down their plates and held a pepper mill over Sonja's food. "Pepper?" "No. Thank you." He nodded and left. "Sonja..." "Oh ... yes ... Daddy, his name is Steve Miller. And ... he's white, Daddy, and he works for the LAPD." She flinched and waited. "Then Frank was right. You were seen out to lunch with a police officer." "Yes, Daddy." "You didn't have to lie to me, Sonja." "Didn't I? Daddy, I thought you would think I was sleeping with the enemy. I had no idea what kind of grief I would get from you and Mama." She poked at her salad nervously. "Why a police officer? Sonja, isn't that just a little below you? I mean, a white lawyer, a white doctor, I can almost understand—" "I didn't mean for us to fall in love, Daddy." His expression changed to a serious one. "You love this man?" Fidgeting anxiously, she bit her lip and nodded. Exhaling a long sigh, Harold cut up his steak and took a bite as he thought about it. Once he swallowed he said, "I know you. I know you don't do anything lightly. Why, if I had said a month ago you would meet a white LA cop and fall in love you would have bit my head off!" She smiled in embarrassment. 127
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"...but—if you tell me you met this man ... and you love him ... then what can I say? He must be very special to have won your heart." "Oh, he is, Daddy! I've never met a man who is so caring. He is so wary of my feelings he thinks about me in every way. Frank wasn't like that, Daddy. He was a selfish man—selfish in his actions, in his words, and in his loving. Steve is different. He's soft, gentle, and kind. And I've never felt someone love me like he does. He's not pretentious, Daddy. He is honest and says what he thinks. I know exactly where I stand with him all the time. No games, Daddy." "Well, maybe I have to meet this man." Brightening up, she reached out and touched his hand. "You will. And he can be a good resource for you, too! He's inside the police department and very sympathetic to the black community. He can be a big help to you, Daddy." He shook his head in awe. "I just never would have believed it, Sonja. That's all. It's just a little bit of a shock." "Will you tell, Mama?" "Me?" "Yes. Please. I just know how she'll react to it. She'll have my head, Daddy. Can you just tell her he's a good man? That he treats me good?" Chewing his steak and shaking his head at her, he replied, "I think you should be the one to tell her." "No! Oh, you mention it to her. Soften her up. Then once she's gotten used to the idea I'll speak to her about it. I'll bring him over to meet you both." 128
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"You know your mother, Sonja. There is no 'softening up'. She has her beliefs and she's not one to change her mind." "So ... so, she'll be a racist and not give him a chance." "Sonja," he admonished. "Well? That's what she is, Daddy. If she hates him just because he's white—" "I told you, I think it's the police thing that will upset her." Pouting in frustration, Sonja lowered her voice and said, "You know, Daddy, years ago people used to respect what the police did. They do a very hard job out there. I never thought much about it before but, I have to tell you, I fear for him now, Daddy. He has to wear that bullet proof vest every day. Someone will try to kill him some day and I just get crazy thinking about him getting hurt." Giving her a soft smile, Harold said, "My, he must be something. I've never heard you defend the police." Her cheeks heating up with her blush, she lowered her eyes to her meal and whispered, "I never thought I'd be defending them either." "All right, sugar. You let me tell your mama for you. But— expect a call from her right after and she'll be hollering her head off." Giggling at his expression of the hell fire to come, she said, "Okay, Daddy. I know." **** Steve hopped out of his truck when his mother's car pulled into the lot. Catching her eye, he waved at her and waited while she parked. 129
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"Hi, Mom." He kissed her cheek. "Hello, Steven," she said coldly. He held the door open for her and they were hit with the scent of dill pickles and cold cut meats. "Two, for lunch," he told the waitress. "Sit anywhere. I'll bring a menu over in a minute." "Thanks." Steve escorted his mother to a table by the window. "I expected it to be packed." "It is most weekends. I guess it's just quiet because it's a Tuesday." She sat down and set her purse by her feet. "Oh, thanks..." Steve took the menu from the waitress. "You want coffee or anything?" the waitress asked, chewing her gum. "Yes, I'd like a cup. Mom?" "Yes. That would be fine." Steve could feel his mother's attitude in everything she did. It was unnerving and making concentration difficult. When the waitress brought them a pot of coffee to share and some milk, Steve thanked her and asked, "You ready to order, Mom?" "Yes, dear." They ordered their food when the waitress came over with her pad. "Right," she said, took the menus and left, then returned quickly with their drinks. Steve thanked her, taking his time mixing milk into his coffee, looking out of the window at the passing pedestrians and traffic. "Are you going to tell me what this is all about, Steven?" Susan asked in irritation. 130
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"Can we eat first?" "Steven!" "Right ... look, it's no big deal. I'm not in trouble or anything." She crossed her arms over her chest impatiently. "It's just that there's a new woman in my life." "Oh?" She unclenched her arms and leaned closer. "And?" "She's really amazing, Mom. She's an attorney and comes from a really wonderful background. Her father's an attorney as well, and her mom is a designer. She's really high class." "That's wonderful, Steven! Why did you make it sound so mysterious when you called? I think it's wonderful news. What's her name? When can we meet her?" "Her name is Sonja Knight. I don't know when you can meet her." "Sonja ... that's a lovely name. Is it Italian or something?" She sipped her coffee. "No." Steve noticed the waitress bringing their food. He paused and sat back as she set it down. "Anything else?" "No, we're fine." She stuffed the bill next to the napkin holder and left. Steve inspected the food, pulling the toothpick out of the bread and took a bite. "Mmm, good!" "They do have good food here. Your father and I always come here after morning bingo." Chewing his food, then sipping from a glass of water, Steve said, "Uh, so, this woman, Sonja..." "Yes, dear." Susan relaxed and ate her food. 131
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"She ... she's..." "She's what? Oh, no, Steven, she's not married!" "No! No, she's not married, not divorced, doesn't have any kids ... no ... and she's twenty-nine. So, she's not too young or too old." "Oh. I suppose she's not too old. She's four years older than you, Steven. You don't mind that?" "No. Not in the least, Mom. She's strikingly beautiful. Like a model. And her fashion sense is meticulous. I suppose she gets it from her mother." "Have you met her parents?" "No. Not yet. We've only known each other for a few weeks. It's all really new." "Well, bring her over! We could have a barbeque on one of your days off!" "I will. Soon. But, it's just that I'm worried about what Dad will do." "Why? I think your father will be pleased. He's been complaining about you not dating. Well, you even heard him making a comment about you being a..." She lowered her voice, "...a homosexual." "It's just ... it's just that ... she's ... she's..." "She's what? Mexican? Is she Mexican, Steven? Oh, your father won't like that. Is that it? Is she Hispanic?" Staring her straight in the eye he said, "No. She's black." Taking a moment to hear what he said and then digest it, Susan set her sandwich down and glared at him. "No! No, Steven!" "Mom, calm down!" 132
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"How could you!? Oh, your father will be so furious! I don't understand how you could be attracted to a ... black ... woman! Where on earth did that come from? Steven, there are so many attractive white women around, couldn't you find one of them?" "Mom! Calm down!" He looked around in paranoia. "Don't you bring her to the house! Don't you ever bring her around, Steven!" "What the hell is wrong with you!?" he snarled. "Will you shut your mouth for one minute?" "Don't you talk to me like that!" "Mom, if you were listening to me at all, you would have heard that she is a brilliant attorney—she's gorgeous—" Holding up her hand, she indicated she didn't want to hear it. "Enough. I have to go." "What? You're not even going to finish your lunch?" "I lost my appetite." When she reached down for her purse, Steve grabbed her wrist to stop her. She met his eye in surprise. The moment she connected to his glare he snarled in fury, "If you walk out on this lunch without coming to a compromise with me over this ... you will lose me forever!" Her eyes widened and her face lost some color. "I will move. I will disconnect my phone number. We will never speak or see one another again. You have my word, Mother. The end. You will have lost me. Do you understand?" She set her purse back down and sat back, dabbing a tissue to her nose and staring at him. 133
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He released her wrist and lowered his voice. "I expected this from Dad. Not from you. I thought you were a decent person. You go to that fucking church every Sunday. What the hell do they teach you in there? Racism and intolerance? For cryin' out loud, listen to the poison you are spouting! You are talking about the woman I love! How the hell can you sit there in your church-lady outfit with that fricken' crucifix around your neck and spout hate? You make me sick! At least meet her! See how refined and intelligent she is! You and dad aren't worthy enough to be cleaning up her shit! And talking about religion, doesn't it say in the Gospel of John that God loved the whole world he sent his son; not just white people?" "Oh! Steven Jay Miller!" He threw his crumpled napkin on top of his uneaten sandwich and crossed his arms tightly over his chest. He was about to kill someone. "The food all right?" The waitress looked down at the halffull plates. "Yeah. I'm done. Take it away." Steve avoided her eye. "Do you want me to box it up?" She lifted the plates. "No." She left them alone. Susan took a few deep breaths and tried to compose herself though she was near tears. "I'm sorry. You're right. It wasn't very Christian of me to say those things." "Damn fucking right." "If you want me to meet this young lady, I will."
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Unraveling his tightly wound arms, he relaxed his muscles and looked at her again. "Thank you. That's all I ask. If you give her half a chance you may even like her." "I'm sure I will." She forced a smile and failed. "What about Dad?" "You know exactly what your father will think." "Talk to him." "My talking to him will make no difference to him." "You can tell him what I said. He'll be out of my life completely." "Most likely if he knows you are seeing a black woman, he'll disown you anyway." He didn't think it would sting, but it did. "Fine." "I really need to get back home, Steven. I've got things to do." He took his wallet out of his pocket and counted out a few bills. Shaking, she stood and found her purse then walked with him to the cashier. He paid and followed her outside. It was obvious to him they were both feeling sick and drained. "I'll try and find a time when Sonja is free to meet you." "Yes, dear. Goodbye." Without her customary peck on the cheek to wish him on his way, she walked to her car and climbed in, never turning back or waving. It had gone exactly as he expected. The worst was yet to come. **** 135
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By five o' clock Sonja was finishing up for the day, closing her computer down and packing her briefcase with some paperwork she needed to read through. She hoped after dinner Steve would give her a few minutes to catch up on her work. When her cell phone rang she looked at the display and answered it. "Hello." "Child—you have gone out of your mind!" She sighed, "Hello, Mama." "Tell me what your father just told me is just a joke to wind me up!" "No. It isn't." "A white policeman? Are you in some kind of drug induced state? Sonja, listen to yourself! Think about your position in the community! Think about your work! How will it look to your clients if they find out you are sleeping with the enemy!?" "He's not the enemy, Mama." "Yes, he is! You lose sight of it when you look through your ga-ga eyes at him! But he will hurt you! In the end, you will lose credibility in the community! In the legal profession! Is any man worth that? When he finally finishes using you like a rag—" "He is not using me! I resent that!" "What on earth does he want with a black woman? What's it got to do with him? Is it for some bet or something? Use your head, Sonja! He's a white—LAPD cop! Do I need to repeat it? Don't you remember Rodney King? I can list dozens of cases of police misconduct. That department is institutionally racist! I think you are making a big mistake!" 136
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"Racist? You want to hear a racist? Listen to yourself, Mama!" "Why don't you find yourself a white doctor? You think I'm a racist, but I'm not! You find yourself a nice rich white doctor! I don't care if he's Jewish! He'll be of your status in life! Not slumming it with some crummy cop! You are a woman of class and dignity, Sonja! We brought you up to appreciate the finer things in life! What do you want with a blue collar cop? I am so ashamed of you!" "Okay, then you're a snob!" "You're right! I am a snob! Your father and I worked ourselves up from nothing to be where we are! We didn't intend for you to bring us back down!" "Stop it! Mama, I'll hang up on you! Don't insult him to me!" "I can't believe you have anything in common with this man? What is it? Is he good in the sack, Sonja? Are you thinking with your sex?" "Stop it! You really are pushing me too far!" "You think it's some status symbol to walk around with a white man on your arm? Huh? Tell me! What on earth is the attraction for him?" "He loves me, Mama!" she started crying. "He loves me and treats me like gold! He cares for me! He protects me! I've never had a man so kind and good-hearted like he is! He's an honest, decent man! I can count on him—any time! He never lets me down, Mama! Never!" Sonja tried to hear something from the other end of the phone. Silence was all that returned. Hating herself for 137
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getting emotional, she took some deep breaths and slowed down. "I don't care what you think, Mama. I don't care if you never meet him. You and I will be strangers. I can live with that. Daddy understood. He said if I love him, then he must be a good man. You go and listen to Daddy. He loves me unconditionally. He knows me. You go sit and have another chat with him. Let him talk some sense into you." "Okay, child, calm down ... all right." Finding a tissue in her purse, Sonja dabbed at her eyes and tried to get her breathing under control. "I don't know who this damn cop is, but he sure has got you under his spell." She laughed softly. "If you meet him, you'll see. He's sweet as sugar, Mama, and as handsome as a movie star." "I have no doubt he'd have to be special to have got you so in love." "I am in love with him. I'm so mad for him I can't think of anything else." "My, my ... listen to yourself." "I know. It's crazy, Mama. I know. But I didn't plan on it. It just happened." "Well, I better meet this Mr. Wonderful myself, then hadn't I!?" She started laughing in relief. "Yes. Yes, you need to meet him. I want both you and Daddy to see what kind of a man he is for yourself. Then you'll understand." "Okay, child, we'll arrange something soon. You just don't get hurt, that's all I ask." "He won't hurt me, Mama. I trust him with my life." 138
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"I'll keep my fingers crossed for you then. All right. Let me go. You just ring when you want to arrange something. Maybe we can all go out to dinner." "Yes. On his next days off I'll make arrangements." "Okay, Sonja." "Bye, Mama. I love you." "I love you, too." She disconnected the line and sat back in her chair. Taking a minute to control her emotions, she opened her purse and found her compact, then checked her eyes and make-up in it. **** When the phone rang he hurried to it wondering if it was Sonja. "Hello?" "Hi, Stevie." "Hi, Laura." "I just got off the phone with Mom." "Oh?" He sat down on the sofa. "She was really upset. She said you threatened her and were very mean to her." "I had to be, Laura! She immediately started on the race thing. I had no choice." "She said she's not going to mention it to Dad." "I don't care what she does." He rubbed his face tiredly. "She said he'd disown you and never forgive you." "No great loss." "I had a feeling it wouldn't go over well." His chest welling again with his rage he shouted, "Why not!? Why should it matter? Laura, you saw Sonja! She's so 139
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much better than they are it sickens me that they are the ones with the attitude!" "I know! Don't yell at me!" "Did you tell Mom you met her?" "Yes! Steve, I put in a good word, believe me! I told her she was gorgeous and refined. I did! All the right words, Stevie, I swear!" "Did it make a difference?" "A little. You know, Sonja is so striking looking, I do think Mom would retreat her stance on meeting her." "I think that as well. Look, when I arrange it, on a day when Dad is working, you come too. I can use all the back-up I can get." "Roger!" She laughed. "I'm serious, Laura." "I know. But, even if you win Mom over, which to be honest, I think you will do once she meets her, what are you going to do about Dad?" "I don't know ... I guess we'll just avoid him. I can't go on trying to please a man who is impossible to please." "God, he will go so ballistic when he finds out." A cold ball filled Steve's stomach. "Why does he have to be so ignorant? Why?" "I don't know, Steve. I really don't know." Inhaling a deep breath, Steve said, "All right, look, let me go. Sonja's on her way and we've got dinner reservations at seven." "Okay. Call me when you arrange a meeting with her and Mom." 140
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"I will. See ya, Laura." He hung up and looked at the clock, then got up to splash his face and brush his hair. **** Looking back at her car after she rang his intercom, Sonja heard his voice over the speaker and then the buzzer on the door sounded. She pushed the elevator button and stepped in, then once again checked her face to see if there were any signs of her earlier tears. He was waiting outside the elevator door when it opened. "Hi, babe." He kissed her and held her hand as they walked down the carpeted corridor to his unit. Once he was inside he checked his watch. "We have a minute before we have to leave. You want to sit and relax?" She set her briefcase down and then collapsed on the couch. "Yes, all right. I have just a little reading to do after dinner. You don't mind, do you?" "Of course not. How about a glass of red?" "Sounds nice." He left and she gazed around the clean calm room and leaned her head back on the cushions. Returning with a stemmed glass, he handed it to her and watched her sip it, then sat on the floor in front of her and removed her high heel shoe. "Oh, that is wonderful..." she moaned as he massaged her foot through her silk stockings. "Did you have lunch with your dad today?" "Yes." "And?" 141
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"He was all right. He was a little judgmental at first, but I think he understood." "I am really pleased, Sonja." "Me, too. I got a call right before I left the office from my mother. Oh—she started screaming and shouting!" She waved her hand around and then took another sip of wine. "But even she calmed down after a while. I think it'll be all right." "Thank fuck!" He took off her second shoe and began massaging the other foot. "What about you? Did you talk to your mom?" "Yeah. We went out to lunch. What a performance." "Uh oh." "It was what I expected. But, she also gave in a bit. I told her we'd schedule some day to meet up." "And Dad?" Steve made a sour face and got up to wash his hands and find his car keys. Sonja finished her wine and slipped her heels back on. "What happened with your Dad, Steve?" "Laura called me just a few minutes ago. She had talked to Mom. She said Mom won't mention it to him. Everyone thinks he'll go insane. Mom even said he'll disown me, but I'm sure they're overreacting." "Well, three out of four isn't bad." She tried to laugh. Grim faced, Steve didn't answer. He slipped on his shoulder holster, checked to see he had his badge in his wallet, then put his suit jacket over the top. "Come here." 142
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He perked up and looked at her. She was curling her finger at him. Smiling sensuously, he wrapped around her and kissed her passionately. At the feel of her mouth and the scent of her perfume, his mood elevated substantially. "Everything will be all right." "I know," he sighed, and kissed her nose with a quick peck. "I think once everyone meets and the mystery is solved they will see there's no need to be upset." "Exactly." Steve nuzzled into her hair and kissed her neck. "Right. Shall we go?" "Now I don't want to leave," he purred. "You'll have me all night long, lover." "Ohhh, that sounds soooo good," he hummed. "Let's eat. I'm starving. I didn't get too much of my lunch down." "Ditto," he replied. "It sounds like we had similar experiences." "We did." She waited as he set the alarm, closed and locked the door, then reached out to her hand. "You know the odd thing?" "What's that?" He pushed the button for the elevator. "They didn't really mind you were white." "Really?" "Yes. It was the fact that you were a cop. I never expected that." "So, if I was a white brain surgeon they'd be fine?" He waited for her to step in and then pushed the button for the parking garage. 143
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"Yes!" She laughed. "Well! Back to night school, then!" He grinned at her. "Did you ever think of doing anything else? You know, other than being a cop?" When they stepped out into the echoing cement garage he chirped his alarm on his truck. It was the first time since she met him that she had seen what he drove around in. He opened her side and hoisted her up by her waist to help her get in then went around and climbed in the other side. "Wow! This is a fancy truck! I never knew they were so posh in the interior!" She admired the leather seats and shining accessories as she put her seatbelt on. "It's top of the line. Dolby speakers, CD player, A/C, all power everything ... I love it." "Comfy! And we're so high up!" "It feels safer. You know if you get hit you'll live." He started the engine and turned down the music. "You never answered my question." He backed out of the space and hit the automatic gate opener. "Which question was that?" "Would you ever do another job?" Leaving the garage, pausing as the gate closed behind him, Steve thought about that question for a long while, not sure how to answer it. Looking out at the traffic quietly, Sonja clasped his hand and held it tightly as they drove to the restaurant. He parked in the restaurant lot and helped her out of the high truck, then clasped her hand as they walked to the front entrance. He held open the door for her and allowed her to 144
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pass through it first, then followed her to where the hostess was standing. "I've a reservation ... Steve Miller..." he said. "Yes..." She crossed off his name and then smiled. "Right this way, please." Gesturing for Sonja to go first, Steve, deep in thought, followed behind. As they approached the designated table, he noticed a man giving him a nasty look. Instantly Steve glared at the man and waited to see how long it would take him to stop staring. Sonja sat down gracefully and placed her purse under the table. When she did, she smiled up at Steve and waited for him to sit down. Seeing him frozen for a moment, and his gaze connected to another man in the room, she immediately grew uncomfortable and whispered, "Sit down, Steve." Now in a foul mood, he dragged the chair back, sat down and thanked the hostess for the menu, then looked up again at the man to see if he was still eyeing them. "Steve ... forget it," she whispered and touched his hand. "If he looks at me that way again I'll kill him." Grinning wryly, she replied, "We will never be completely free of ignorance, Steve. But we can avoid having it ruin our evening. Just ignore him and look at me." Forcing himself to peer over the menu at her calm smiling face, he exhaled a breath and tried to block the rest of the world out of his mind for an hour. ****
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"I brought a change of clothing. It's in the trunk of my car." "All right." Steve reached for her waist and helped her down to the cement floor of the parking garage. "It was a lovely meal, Steve. I've never tried that restaurant before." "I really love it there. The food is consistently good." He held her hand and chirped the alarm on the truck, then opened the door to the condo and allowed her to pass first. They moved directly through the building to the front door and Sonja stood at the trunk of her car and used the remote to open it. Steve admired the silver Mercedes and reached for her small overnight case as she held onto a business suit in a garment bag. She closed the trunk and ignited her alarm, then followed him back into the building. As they stood in the elevator, both of them were deep in thought. It wasn't until she had hung up her clothing and kicked off her shoes in his condominium that one of them spoke. "You seemed very quiet tonight, Steve." "Hmm? Just tired. Can I get you anything?" "Maybe some water. I really need to read over my notes for a few minutes. I hope you don't mind." "No. I don't mind at all." He disappeared into the kitchen and poured her some water from a bottle, then returned and set it on the coffee table. They hadn't discussed anything at dinner but current events and some Hollywood gossip. Neither one of them wanted to ruin their good mood or discuss the initial irritation of the rude staring man. 146
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"Should I do this in the bedroom so you can watch the television or something?" "Nope, you go ahead and make yourself comfortable. I'll just go take a shower and relax." "Thanks, babe. I know it's a pain." "No problem." He unraveled his tie and looked down at the paperwork. "What case are you working on?" Looking up at him sheepishly, she gave him a wry smile. "You're joking!" "No. Now no peeking. Shoo." As he unbuttoned his starched shirt he couldn't help but look over her shoulder at it. "Just a quick look. Come on..." "No! Are you kidding me?" She laughed and sipped the water. "You're going with self-defense?" "No. Not guilty." "What?" he choked. "I said go away!" She waved her hand at him. As he walked to the bedroom, he mumbled, "Not guilty? How can they not be guilty?" She smiled to herself and shook her head. **** Hearing the shower blast, she focused on her work and read a few chosen cases that her paralegal had located. Making notes, scribbling down ideas, she had come to a stopping point and chewed on the back of the pen wistfully as she concentrated on what to do next. The sound of the water had stopped some time ago. She set the pen down and 147
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turned to look over her shoulder at the closed bathroom door. A devilish smile spread across her lips. Placing the paperwork back into her leather briefcase and zipping it up, she got to her feet and moved across the plush carpet to that door. **** He was leaning over the sink brushing his teeth. He rinsed his mouth, wiped his hands on a towel, and then felt his jaw to see if he needed a shave. When the sound of the door handle turning caught up with him, he looked at it and waited. A gust of moist warm air rushed out. The mirror had a round gap in the steam where he had used a towel to wipe it. The light bulb felt bright and hazy. He stood back from the sink and smiled adoringly at her. "All done?" "No, sugar, I'm just about to start." She grinned wickedly. "Come and get it." He spread out his arms, palms forward in invitation. Closing the space between them, she wrapped her left hand around his waist, and with her right she reached between his legs and felt the weight of his warm testicles in her palm. He went for her lips and kissed her passionately, moaning as her fingers toyed with his balls, then began stroking his cock. He cupped her face and went wild with his tongue, sucking at her mouth and teeth as she drove him crazy.
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She set back from his lips with a gasp and said, "What a lovely body you have, Officer Miller. You are like refined sugar, sweet, sweet, sweet!" She shook her head. "It's your body, you own it..." "I like the sound of that!" "What do you want to do with your body?" He caressed her cheek softly. "Go and get on that bed! I'll show you exactly what I'm going to do with it!" As he made for the hallway, she slapped his bottom. He darted away from a second swipe and raced to his bedroom with her in pursuit. He leapt on the bed with a bounce, and then spun around to her. Coming in behind him, she paused, and then decided to remove her clothing in a striptease. As he watched, going mad for her, he clung to the blankets and licked his lips hungrily. In fun, she spun her shirt over her head and danced, thrusting her hips to and fro, and all the while he was glued to her, yearning to have her fantastic mocha skin against him. When she was down to her bra and thong, she cupped her breasts and pressed them tightly together, pursing her lips at him seductively. He sprung off the bed and grabbed her, nuzzling his face into her cleavage as she laughed in enjoyment. "I knew you wouldn't sit and watch the show!" "I can't! You're too hot!" He kissed her neck and then lifted her up in his arms and carried her to the bed. Setting her 149
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down gently, he slowed himself down and smoothed her hair back from her forehead. "I am so in love with you, Sonja. I've never felt this way before." "Neither have I, Steve. It's scaring the hell out of me!" She laughed. "I keep worrying that one day we won't be together. I dread the day when I can't touch you, hold you, make love to you." "Why? Where you going?" she asked in anxiety. "Nowhere! No! I'm not going anywhere! I just know it's too good to last. I feel like I have to savor every minute with you." "Stop. Stop making us worry for no reason and find a condom." She put her finger to his lips to quiet him. He reached into his nightstand and tore one off the strip, then handed it to her. She opened it and tossed the foil, sliding it on him. Backing up, he waited as she opened her legs for him, then watched her expression as he pushed in. A shiver raced down his spine and he had to still himself for a minute to get under control. Then unable to resist, he held her breast in his hand and sucked on that luscious dark nipple. Swirling his tongue over it until it hardened, he nibbled it between his teeth gently until he felt Sonja squirming under him. As his heart rate began to soar, he arched his back and stared down at their connection, loving the contrast of color and the darkness of her pubic hair as it blended with his light brown ones. The sticky heat between her legs was bringing him closer to the edge. Grinding his teeth, he held back, wanting 150
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her to reach climax first. Closing his eyes, trying not to come, Steve concentrated on swirling his hips on her clitoris, knowing that was the magic spot. Opening his eyes, staring at her face and breasts, Steve was nearing the point where he couldn't hold on much longer. When her lips opened for a gasp he blinked and looked down at her. Knowing she was there, he thrust inside her deeply, grinding his teeth at the intensity and came in a blaze of fiery color. The sensation washed over his entire body in a flash of fire. Grunting like an animal, he pressed his hips against her as hard as he could and felt his cock throb inside her. When she caught her breath she connected to his eyes. Once he met hers, she whispered, "I have never made love to a man like this before. You always satisfy me." He smiled proudly, trying not to beam with pride. "I am addicted to your cock!" He burst out laughing and wrapped around her tightly. "God, I love you!" He feathered her with kisses all over her face and hair as she laughed at the tickling. When he pulled out, about to climb off the bed and clean up, she held onto his arm and stopped him. "Nothing is going to happen to us, Steve. I promise you that." A bright smile shining on his face, he leaned over to kiss her lips, then threw out the condom and came rushing back to nestle under the sheets. "Set the alarm?" she asked. "Yup." 151
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"Good night, baby." "Good night, my love."
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Chapter Eleven After Sonja left for the office Steve's apartment felt empty. To kill some time before his night shift, he dressed in a pair of shorts and left to go for a run. Once he had a few miles behind him Steve began to ruminate over all the things they had discussed overnight, and the one thing that stuck in his mind was the idea that he should find another line of work. The notion of being a cop came from his father. He had pointed Steve in that direction ever since he was in junior high school. Lucky Laura had her choice of colleges and careers. The only time she was given any grief was after her failed marriage. Lasting only two years, Laura admitted wedding your high school sweetheart wasn't the best of ideas. Other than that one blip, Laura was a free agent and never under their father's thumb like he was. Was he brainwashed? Was he led to believe he had no other choice than to follow in Dick Miller's footsteps? He didn't remember. His college degree was in criminal law. Having mostly liberal studies, he didn't imagine making a career out of any of the several options he could have chosen. Could he have been a lawyer? Christ, Dad, you always said I was too lazy to do anything else. Steve wiped the sweat off his face and checked the road behind him as he sprinted across it. What the hell else can I do? The damn money is pretty good. Go back to school? And live on what? Have Sonja support me? Oh, no, sick! Sick! He cringed and picked up his pace. What the hell am I ganna do? 153
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**** "Yeah ... like ... the guy pointed a gun at me ... so? What was I supposed to do?" Sonja tried to read the dark blue tattoos on his neck and forearms. They were an odd mishmash of symbols she couldn't decipher. "So, now you admit you shot him?" "I didn't shoot nobody! The pigs said I did it!" "Right. So, someone pointed a gun at you and you did nothing." "Whose side are you on, bitch? You look black but you talk white!" "Believe it or not, I'm on your side, Terrance. I'm trying to determine whether we need to go with self-defense or not guilty. You keep changing your story." "I'm not changin' no story! You ain't listening!" "I am listening now. Did you, or did you not, shoot that boy?" "I ain't admitting nothing! I didn't shoot no one!" "So, not guilty. Right?" "That's what I'm sayin'! All those stupid dumb-asses pointed to me when 'the man' showed up! I didn't do nuthin'!" "All right. Do you know who did?" "I ain't turnin' on no one!" "You do realize if you don't tell me who did it, and all the witnesses think it was you, you will most likely go to jail for it." "I ain't afraid of no jail. You see this tattoo? I got that from the state prison! I don't care." 154
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"I don't mean in jail for a few months. I mean life." His expression hardened. "I didn't kill no one! You get off your skinny butt and get me out of here!" She stood and called to the prison guard to let her out of the room. The door was unlocked and a guard came in, putting the handcuffs back on the prisoner. "You get me out of here, bitch! You get me out of here!" She watched as he was dragged out and tried not to look at the guards' sneer as she was escorted back to daylight and fresh air. When she escaped the lock-up facility she dialed her mobile phone. "Carl? Sonja. Look, what's the DA offering on the gang shooting?" "First degree murder." "Not even second degree? You have to be kidding..." "No. They're going hard line on any gang related violence. You get any information from the kid?" "No, he's not giving me anything I can use. How credible are the witnesses?" "They're pretty good. I spoke to three of them myself. They are sure he's the one." "Damn. I wanted self-defense, but he's denying he pulled the trigger! First he says he had a gun pointed at him, then he changes the damn story!" She opened her car door and climbed in, setting her briefcase down on the seat next to her. "Look, I don't know which way to go." "We have to discredit the witnesses. That's our first job."
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"I know, Carl. I don't think that will be too hard. They're a bunch of kids." She stuck her key in the ignition and looked around the busy parking lot. "Using the race card?" "Yes. You know, all blacks look alike crapola, and how can they be sure it's him? The witnesses were all white, right?" "One Hispanic," Carl said. "Big deal, we'll still use it." "Next move..." "Yeah?" "Discredit the investigation." She cringed. "Sonja?" "I'm here." "Get the name of the primary officer—once you got it, find some dirt on him. Put him through the grinder. The juries here in LA are biased against the cops as it is, so once you make him look like a liar his investigation will collapse. With shaky witness testimony and a bad investigation, we have an acquittal. They can't convict beyond a reasonable doubt ... Sonja? Are you still there?" "Yes, Carl. No other way to do it? I have to go after the cop?" "What's the problem? You've done it before, Sonja. Just do what you do best. Make them look more inept than the Keystone cops. He didn't find the gun on him, right? There wasn't any forensics on the gun, no clear prints." "Maybe I can just do it to the follow up units." 156
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"Why? What's the deal with the primary officer? Do you know who it is?" "Yeah. I do." She bit her knuckle and stared out of the window tiredly. "Who is it?" "Miller. Steve Miller." "Never heard of him." "He's a rookie." "Perfect! You got him, Sonja. Go for the jugular." "Right. I gotta go, Carl. Thanks for the help." "You can borrow one of my girls if you need more research. Anything you need." "Thanks. I'll speak to you soon." She hung up and stuffed her phone into her purse. How on earth can I do that to Steve? Knowing if she didn't, Carl would, she started the car and pulled out of the parking lot on her way to her office. **** "Did you have a nice weekend, Steve?" Lydia sat next to him in the roll call room. "Yes, it was excellent! How about you?" "Mostly errands, laundry, shopping ... not really anything too exciting." They looked up as Brian came in the room. "You're in my seat, Brown." "It's not your seat. Your name isn't on it!" Lydia snorted at him. "I always sit here!" "You didn't last time," Steve said. 157
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"One time, big deal. Move, Lydia!" "Leave her alone, Brian, find another fucking seat." Instead of taking another chair at another table, Brian leaned back against the wall near them. The same place he was last time when he wouldn't sit down next to Steve. Lydia and Steve exchanged a shake of their heads, rolling their eyes at his behavior. The sergeants called them to attention and commenced with roll call. **** Late in the shift Steve was finishing up his report in the church lot when a patrol car found him and parked beside him. "Hi, Steve." "Hi, Lydia. What do you have?" "Property damage—be still my heart." He laughed at her expression. "Oh, I got that beat. I got a domestic, verbal only." "Our life is so exciting." "Don't say that. Last time you did we had a shooting!" "Yeah! We don't get too many in our division. I better keep my mouth shut." After a moment she asked, "Seen Brian at all?" "No. I think he's pissed off at us." "He's such a baby. Should I type him and tell him we're here?" "Naa. I don't really like associating with him." "I know! Especially after what Jessie and Isaac said! I never thought Brian was that bad." "He obviously is, so why deal with him, ya know?" 158
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"What a jerk." "I know." They went back to their work, keeping an ear out for the radio dispatcher. **** "Well, the wayward lady finally found her way home!" Chelsea looked up from her Chinese take out meal. "I've missed you!" "Thanks, Chel. Mmm, that smells good!" "There's loads! Grab a plate. I always order too much, and, well, I was hoping you were going to come home tonight." "You are the best roommate!" Sonja found a plate and set it down. "What have we got? ... oohh, egg foo young ... nice, and sweet and sour chicken ... yes ... rice, egg rolls ... girl— you were ordering for an army!" "I kinda got carried away ... so! Who's the new love in your life?" Sonja unwrapped the paper from the chopsticks and dug in. "Just a guy." "Just a guy? You spent the last two nights with him! Where did you meet?" "At work." She stood and poured herself a glass of wine. "You want some?" "Yeah, why not." Once she set both glasses on the table she resumed her eating, feeling really hungry. "What have you been up to?" "Don't change the subject!" Chelsea sighed in annoyance. "What's his name?" "His name?" Sonja tried to think of one. 159
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"Yes! His name! Man, you are really being evasive about him." Struggling to come up with something that didn't sound contrived, Sonja finally breathed out in surrender and said, "I may as well tell you so you hear it from me." "Huh?" Chelsea tilted her head. "Steve. His name is Steve Miller." Looking perplexed, Chelsea repeated it a couple of times under her breath. "Miller? Any relation to Officer Miller?" "You could say that." Sonja stopped eating and waited for the fall out. "What? His brother? You met Officer Miller's brother?" "Chelsea! Not his brother! It's Officer Miller. His first name is Steve." It took a moment, then she gasped, "My Officer Miller?" "Your Officer Miller? No—My Officer Miller." "You stole him from me?" she squeaked. "What do you mean 'stole' him! You never had him! He wanted me from the first day he met us!" Slamming down her chopsticks, Chelsea shouted, "You traitor! I thought you were nice! How can you do that to me?" "Do what to you? I didn't do anything to you! He pursued me and not you! What the heck do you want me to do? It wasn't like you two established a relationship!" "But, you don't like white guys! Or LAPD cops! You must be doing this just to spite me!" "Oh, I don't need this!" Sonja rubbed her forehead like it ached. "Chelsea, I'll ask him to set you up, all right? He must know lots of other cops that we can match you up with." 160
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"I don't want anyone else!" she whined. "You stole him!" she said, storming away from the table to her room. "Fine! I stole him! Fine! Whatever! I'm still going to enjoy my meal!" Sonja shouted after her. "I'm sick of people making me lose my appetite!" She bit into an eggroll and chewed spitefully. "I stole him." She shook her head. "That girl is delusional." **** Very glad the shift was over, Steve headed to the locker room and was about to try his combination when he stopped short. "Oh, shit." Isaac overheard him and turned around, still unbuttoning his uniform shirt. "What is it, Steve?" "Look at this." Isaac came over to him and looked at where he was pointing. In black marker someone had written, 'Nigger-lover' on his locker door. "I'll get the sarge," Isaac whispered and left. Steve stared at it in a trance trying to figure out who found out about him and Sonja. He spun around and looked at the men getting changed in the room. None of them were paying any attention. Sgt. Casey moved Steve out of the way. "When did it show up?" "Sometime after I changed for roll call, sir, at the beginning of shift." "Right." He left and came back with a Polaroid camera a minute later. 161
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Steve stood back with Isaac as photos were taken. "I need a report written, Miller." "I'll write it, Sarge," Isaac offered. "Thanks. Get it to me in the morning. Don't do an OT slip for it." Sgt. Casey waited for his nod, then whispered, "Any idea who did it, Miller?" Steve had one, but didn't say anything. "No, sir." "Get some paper and tape and cover it for now. I'll let the station master know so he can get it cleaned up." "Okay. Can you let Sgt. Lee know, sir?" Jessie stepped back as Sgt. Casey nodded, then passed by him in an angry huff. He walked over to Steve and Isaac and asked, "What's wrong?" They both pointed at the locker. "Oh, for cryin' out loud," Jessie moaned. "I don't get it? Who knows I'm seeing a black woman?" Steve whispered to them. "It ain't that, Steve." Jessie shook his head. "It has to be!" "No..." Isaac looked around the room then said, "It's because you're hanging with us." Steve shook his head at first, then hissed, "Potter?" "That would be my first guess." Isaac looked back at the marks. Steve shoved passed them to Brian's locker and didn't find him there. A hand on his shoulder stopped him from storming out. "Leave it, Steve. He'll never admit to it." "I'll kill him," Steve growled. 162
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Isaac shook his head sadly. "You'll learn to let it roll off you." "I doubt that very much." Steve felt like punching Brian's locker until it burst open. "Let me get some paper and tape." "Thanks, Jessie." Steve tried his combination and tugged open the door violently. Isaac patted his back to calm him down. "Forget about it. It'll be gone in a few hours once the station master is made aware." "Gone from the locker, but never erased from my brain." "Don't torture yourself. Forget it. It's juvenile crap." Jessie returned and held up a blank piece of white paper. Steve held it in place as it was taped over the marks. "Thanks, man." "No problem." "After roll call tomorrow we'll write it up, okay?" "Okay, Isaac. Thanks again." "You just don't get yourself into a state about it." Knowing he already was, Steve just nodded and continued to change into his street clothing. Before he left he stopped by the sergeants' area and located the book that had all their hours logged in it. He used a vacant desk and flipped through it to the present shift. Brian had taken the last half off. Steve slammed it shut and returned it to its place on the shelf. "You need something?" One of the shift-change sergeants saw him with the roster. "No, thanks. I got what I needed." 163
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Steve knew it had to be him, he was just deciding on how to confront him.
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Chapter Twelve Sonja received the cold shoulder over breakfast. "Chelsea! Stop behaving like a spoiled brat! I didn't go after him, he chose me!" Her cereal bowl in her hands, Chelsea spun away from Sonja. "Did he call you? No. Did he come over here to see you? No." Sonja fixed herself a cup of coffee. "Did he call me? Yes! Did he come over to the courthouse to find me? Yes!" she shouted as Chelsea started walking away. "I can't help it if we love each other! It has nothing to do with you!" When Chelsea slammed the door to her bedroom, Sonja shook her head. She moved to the stairs and screamed up, "Do I have to find myself another roommate? Or will you get over it and forgive me!" When nothing came back in reply, Sonja ran her hand through her hair muttering, "I do not need this! I swear, I do not need this!" **** Steve slept the morning away and didn't wake up until after one. He sipped a cup of coffee, then went for his run. The afternoon September sun felt hot on his back. Once he had shaved, showered, and cleaned up the apartment, he checked the time. Sitting down on his sofa he set the phone on his lap and dialed. "Hello, Steve." 165
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"Hi, good lookin'. How's your day going?" "My day is fine, but last night was a disaster." Suddenly wondering if she knew about the locker incident he asked, "Why?" "Ms. Saunders had a fit when I told her about us." "Oh..." He deflated and sighed. "She kept calling you 'my Officer Miller'. I shoulda slapped her." "I wouldn't worry. She'll get over it." "I don't know. She's still wasn't talking to me over breakfast ... are you all right?" "Yeah. Fine." "You sure? What happened? Something happened." "Well, yeah, something did. Last night." "I knew it! Are you hurt? What happened?" "Calm down. I'm fine. Nothing like that." "I swear that damn job you do gives me so much anxiety. I can't stand the idea of you out on the streets of LA in the dark with all those idiots with guns—" "Sonja." "What?" "I'm fine." "What is it, then? Why do you sound so upset?" "Someone tagged my locker with a nasty comment last night." "Uh oh." "It really made me angry, Sonja." "What did it say?" "I can't repeat it." 166
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"That bad?" "Yeah." "Why would someone do that? Did you tell the men you work with about us?" "I ... I don't think it had anything to do with us. At least I don't think so." "Wait. Now I'm lost. I assumed it was racial." "It was. I'm not doing a very good job of explaining it, am I?" "No! I hope you're better on the stand!" "Let me start again. The other night I backed a unit from another division who needed a back up." "So?" "His name is Isaac Johnson." "A black man." "Yes. Well, Isaac and I struck up a friendship and the other night after shift Isaac, and another black officer, Jessie, and I all went out for a quick beer." "Uh huh." "So, now I'm a ... 'nigger-lover'." "How nice. You know who did it?" "I think so. There's a guy in the squad named Brian. He's an ignorant bastard. That evening he got into an argument with another member of the squad and when I defended her, I knew he was angry with me." "So? Tell the supervisor." "It won't do any good. No witnesses. It's just my word against his." 167
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"Forget about it, Steve. I've fought that battle my whole life. It's not worth wasting your time on. They want a reaction. Don't give them one." "It's easy to say. I just envision getting him alone in a dark alley." "Forget it. At least you don't live with him!" She laughed. "Right. Chelsea. You want me to talk to her?" "If you think it'll do any good. She won't talk to me. I don't know how much more of that nonsense I'll be willing to take!" "Move in with me." She chuckled at the idea. "You are one fast mover, Officer Miller!" "I know it's insane. Do it anyway." "Let's just see if Ms. Saunders can't get over her ego first." "I can't get you to change your mind?" "I can't believe you're asking me this over the phone and after all the insanity we're going through! You need to slow down, Officer Miller, and let us catch our breath!" "Why are lawyers so logical?" "Someone has to be!" "I hate this shift. I have to wait until my days off to see you." "No sign of a transfer yet?" "No." "When are your next days off?" "Sunday-Monday." "Wow, that is a long time away."
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"Well, I'm off most of the day on Saturday, so I can stop by your place then. And there's always the time-off option. Just name the day and I'll take it off." "No, save your time for a proper holiday." Pausing, Steve then asked, "You want to take a vacation together?" "It's in the realm of possibilities. Let me just get through this load of work." "You always have too much work." "I know. And speaking of it..." "Gotta go?" "Yes. I really have a ton of reading to do. I shouldn't have the luxury of a long chat." "I must really rate then." "You must!" "Okay, Sonja. Just don't work too hard. I love you." "I love you too, babe." "I'll try to stop by during shift. That way I can get Chelsea to come to her senses." "You do whatever you think is best." "Okay. See ya." "See ya." He hung up and stared at the phone for a moment. The echo of her voice still in his ear, he was trying to stop the longing in his heart from missing her when they were apart. Setting the phone aside, he leaned his head back on the couch, closing his eyes. **** 169
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Disconnecting her mobile phone, Sonja set it into her purse and stared out into space, the case files stacked up under her elbows. Imagining Steve in his soft cotton blue denim shirt and jeans ... the way the material faded to a fuzzy sky blue at his thighs and knees. The memory of his rounded bottom and of his cock bulging inside them sent her into heat. She hated the long days without him and wished he would get off that crazy shift and find some routine they could tolerate. **** Preoccupied, moving through the halls without really seeing or feeling the environment around him, Steve ground his jaw and turned the corner of the wall to where his locker was. Cringing, he peeked at it and found a sandpaper-like smear where the indelible marking pen had been. "Great. A constant reminder." He tugged it open and placed his black waist-bag with his off-duty pistol inside it, and pulled the shirt over his head to get changed. "Hey, Steve." "Hey, Isaac." "We'll get that report done right after roll call." "Okay." Hearing someone behind him, Steve glanced over his shoulder and found Brian opening his locker door. Unable to resist, Steve sneered, "Nice one, Potter." Brian made a show of looking around him. "You talking to me, Miller?" "Don't act so fucking coy." 170
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"Leave me alone." "You'd like that, wouldn't you? And I will. Especially when you need the back-up." Isaac came over to intervene. "Don't say that, Steve. I know you. If someone needs a back-up you'll be there. We're all on the same team, right, Brian?" Brian didn't meet their eyes. Isaac shook his head at Steve and communicated to not pursue the discussion. Steve twisted back to his locker, continuing to get dressed. **** When Steve entered the roll call room Lydia hurried to him. "I heard what happened!" "Man, that didn't take long to make the rounds." "Do you know who did it?" "I have my suspicions." He looked for Brian in the room. "You think it was Brian, don't you?" "Yes." "I don't want to say either way. I just think it sucks." When the sergeant came in for roll call, the first thing on the agenda was a review of diversity training. Steve frowned despite himself and wondered how widespread the gossip had gone. By nine PM he was able to take a break and head to Sonja's house. He parked his patrol car out front and knocked. Chelsea opened it and at first appeared excited, then deflated. "What do you want?" "Let me in, Chelsea." 171
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"She's taking a bath." He stepped in when she opened the door. "Good, it'll give us a chance to talk." Sitting on the sofa, Chelsea twirled her hair around her finger and waited. "I'm sorry if my seeing Sonja hurt you. I didn't mean it to." She shrugged, pouting like a little girl. "I didn't return your call because I wasn't interested in you, Chelsea. It was Sonja I fell for on the night of the attempted burg." "I don't care." "But you do or you wouldn't be treating her so badly. Don't take it out on her. Hate me, I don't care, but don't be mean to her." "How much do you like her? I mean, do you see other women?" "No. I don't see anyone else." "How do you know she's not seeing anyone else?" "Because I trust her." "Huh." She looked at her hair for split ends. "I know you two have been living together for three years, I just don't want to ruin it. Okay? So? Peace?" When she looked up he was holding out his hand. Slowly she climbed off the sofa and reached for it. When she clasped it, he shook it and jumped back as she dove on him and made for his lips. "Chelsea? What the hell are you doing?" 172
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Leaning back, staring at his astonished expression, she asked, "You really don't find me attractive?" "No!" "But! I've got everything men like! Blonde, blue eyes, big tits! I don't get it!" He nudged her away and straightened out his uniform. "I'm sorry. I just have different tastes. I'm sure you'll find someone else who is attracted to those things. I mean, to you." "You know anyone?" She giggled excitedly. "I'll keep you in mind ... I'm going to see Sonja now. Okay? I only have another few minutes left on my break. So, we're okay? You'll be nice to her now?" "Yeah. I suppose." "Thanks, Chelsea. You're a good sport." He took the stairs two by two and hunted her down. Pausing at the top landing, he listened and heard a slight movement of water. Leaning on the door, trying the knob, he twisted it, pushing it open. She gasped, realizing it was Steve. "You gave me a heart attack!" He closed the door behind him and stood over the tub trying to see through the bubbles. "Oh, man—look at you! I am so horny!" "Take off that uniform and join me!" "You have no idea how hard it is not to!" "I have an idea how hard it is..." She let her eyes wander. "Damn!" "So? Did you talk to Chel?" 173
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"Yeah. She's okay now." He sat on the closed toilet seat and scooped some bubbles out to blow at her. "I hope so. I can't stand that hanging over my head. I have enough to worry about." "No, I really think she's okay now." "They get your locker sorted out?" "Yeah. The janitor scrubbed it off. Left a big messy spot on it." "At least it's gone." He checked his watch. "I have to clear and get back to work." "Okay." "Before I go, stand up and let me look at you." Smiling, she gripped the sides of the tub and began to emerge. He stood back, gazing at her. The white foam slowly oozed down her dark skin, rivers of running water glistened like diamonds down her thighs and flat stomach. Moving to this dream, he reached for her face and cupped her jaw, bringing her lips to his. Kissing her passionately, the scent of musk and lavender in the air, impulsively he reached around her and embraced her. When they parted she laughed at all the water and foam on his uniform. "How will you explain this one?" "Who cares?" He kissed her again. "Go. Don't get into trouble on account of me." "Okay." He backed away, then rushed her and kissed her again. "I'm leaving." 174
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"Go! We'll be together soon." She slid back down into the warm water. "Bye." "Bye." Chelsea was standing at the base of the stairs when he came down. She shook her head at his glazed look and chest full of soap bubbles. "Man, you do have it bad." "Oh yes..." He smiled dreamily. "Good night, Officer Miller!" She showed him to the door. "Bye!" **** When he left she hurried up the stairs and tapped the bathroom door. "Come in." Chelsea smiled at her roommate. "He is so cute! And he is really in love with you!" "You okay with that?" "Yeah ... it's too cute to be mad at." "You'll find someone, Chel." "I know. But, you better realize how lucky you are!" "I do!" "Good! I'm going to bed." "Good-night, Chel." "Night, Sonja." ****
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Steve crawled back into his car and cleared his break with the dispatcher, then found a message on his computer from one of the supervisors for him to meet at a designated location at one of the precincts. He put the car in drive and headed there, advising the dispatcher he was out with a supervisor. When he pulled into the precinct lot he noticed another patrol vehicle flash its lights at him. He parked near it and got out, not able to see the occupant until he was up close. "Dad? What are you doing on shift this late?" "I had a late call. An accident fatality." "Oh." Steve tried to think about whether he heard that broadcast and then realized it must have been before his shift started. "I heard another nasty rumor about you." "What now?" Steve threw up his hands. "Am I a transsexual now?" "No. A 'nigger-lover'." Steve cringed and looked him straight in the eye. "That was just a tag some asshole put on my locker last night." "Why would someone write that? What the hell's going on with you?" "Dad, I backed a unit over in Wilshire that was looking for a fast back up. That's it!" "Who's the guy you backed?" "A cop! He was a cop, Dad! Like me! Like you!" "What did you say to your mother that got her so upset?" "Mom's upset?" 176
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"Stop playing dumb. She wouldn't say why she's upset but I can see she is. What did you do now?" "Nothing. I don't know why she's upset. I didn't do anything." "You're a shitty liar." "I'm not lying! Dad, I have to get back to work. It's getting busy." "You're up to something." "Dad, I'm not up to anything." "I'll find out. You can't hide anything in this place. Cops gossip worse than old Jewish hens." "Dad..." Steve rolled his eyes. "I'd rather hear it from you. If I hear it on the rumor mill I'll be fucking furious." Licking his lip, trying to find a way to say it without getting shot, Steve knew he could not win. "Later, Dad. I've got to go." He felt his father was watching him leave, and he also knew he knew he was lying. It was just a matter of time before he found out the truth.
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Chapter Thirteen Rolling over in exhaustion, seeing his clock read half passed noon, Steve answered the phone, trying to clear his mind from his deep sleep. "Oh, no. I woke you again. Oh, Steve! I can't figure out when to call you!" "It's okay, Sonja. I should be getting up now anyway." He yawned and rubbed his hand through his hair. "Can you get tomorrow night off?" "Tomorrow ... tomorrow..." "Saturday. Tomorrow night is Saturday night. Too short notice?" "No. I can try. Why? What have you got in mind?" "Dinner with my mom and dad." "Oh." "What?" "I just didn't expect it so soon." "I just thought it was a good idea. If you don't want to—" "No! No, it's fine. It is a good idea. I'll ask the sarge and let you know. I have no idea what the squad looks like for tomorrow. We've been really short lately and everyone is in one-man units." "They know you have to ask first. So, don't worry if it doesn't work out." "Oh, good ... so ... how's your day going?" "The usual. Busy." 178
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"I noticed I already got a subpoena for that gang shooting." "I thought you'd be getting it soon," she said, "your name is on the prosecutor's witness list." "I thought those trials usually take months to get to the court. What's the deal?" "The DA is anxious to get a conviction, and we're ready for trial. So? Why keep delaying it?" "Because that's the way the system works!" "It still may be continued if something comes up." "So ... Mommy and Daddy this Saturday ... should I be nervous?" "A little. They won't put you through anything nasty. Mama may dig a little at you, but not in a malicious sort of way." "Just protecting her little girl?" "You got that right!" "I can handle it." "I know you can. I've got to go. So, call me when you find out so we can make reservations. Okay, babe?" "Okay, Sonja." "Be careful out there!" "I will." "Love you—" "Love you too." He hung up and stretched his back trying to motivate himself for his run. Climbing out of bed, he washed up and put his jogging shorts on, then found his keys. As he sprinted out into the sunshine, he tried to imagine what her parents would be like. It would be an interesting night. Of that he had no doubt. 179
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**** "Sarge?" "Yeah, Miller?" "How's it look for getting tomorrow off?" "Why? You want a three-day weekend?" "I wouldn't mind." Sgt. Lee reached back for the book and flipped the pages. Running his finger down the rota of names he said, "Looks okay. What do you want?" "Take it as a vacation day." "Done." "Oh, and Sarge?" "Hmm?" "Anything come in about my transfer yet?" "Not yet. You want me to inquire about it?" "If you could. No offense, but this shift is killing me." "It's not for everyone, Miller." He made a note on a post-it. "Thanks, Sarge." "No problem ... oh, Miller?" Steve turned and came back to him. "Any other problems in the locker?" "No. Nothing." "Good. I want to hear about it if there is." "Okay." Steve nodded and headed to the roll call room and took out his mobile phone. "Sonja?" "Yes?" "I got the day off tomorrow." "Oh! Fantastic!" 180
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"Yup. So, you want me to call you tomorrow morning and find out when to pick you up, etcetera?" "Yes. Where are you?" "In the roll call room. I have to go, they're about to start." "Okay, Steve. Be safe." "Bye!" He disconnected the call and met Lydia already sitting in her seat. Steve sat next to her. "Look at this. A subpoena for that gang shooting! You believe that's come to court already?" She waved it at him. "Yeah. I've got one, too." "You should have! You're the primary officer. I don't know what I did." "You took witness statements." "Big deal." "Don't you want the overtime?" "No. I want the sleep!" He smiled at her and then caught Brian coming into the room. Avoiding his eye, he said to Lydia, "I took tomorrow off." "Did you? Bummer. Who will I hang out with?" "How about Potter?" Steve grinned. "Fat chance." She shook her head. **** It was nearing midnight and Steve was about to drive around Sonja's neighborhood to check if it was calm and peaceful. Suddenly he heard Lydia asking for a fast back-up. He grabbed the radio and answered her call. He flipped his lights and sirens on and flew over the open roads. 181
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His tires screeching to a halt behind her patrol car, he raced around it to find her fighting on the ground with a male suspect. Several other cars were heard off in the distance, sirens wailing. Steve jumped on the man, trying to grab his hands to get his cuffs on him, shouting at him to stop struggling. "He's got his dope in his mouth!" Lydia yelled. "He's trying to swallow it!" Steve grabbed the man's jaw and tried to prevent him from gulping it down. "Spit it out! I swear we'll get your stomach pumped!" The man got his arm free and lashed out at Steve. He caught that flailing hand in the face and then managed to grab his wrist to control it, placing one of the cuffs on it, then wrenched it back as Lydia gripped the second wrist. Once he was handcuffed, Steve leaned his knee on the man's neck and did a quick pat down for weapons. "Watch for needles!" Lydia shouted. "All right..." Steve panted, catching his breath. Three other cars pulled up. They raced to assist Steve and Lydia. They stood the suspect up and Steve caught him trying to choke down the drugs. "Spit it out!" He shook him. Unable to get it passed his throat, the suspect gagged and the large lump of plastic was expelled onto the street. "Thank you!" Steve shouted sarcastically, escorting the man in to the back of Lydia's patrol car. "Thanks ... Thanks guys!" Lydia shouted to everyone as they let radio know everything was under control. She took 182
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out a disinfectant wipe and started cleaning her hands. "Oh, Steve. You've got a cut on your face." "Shit. Where?" "Don't touch it with your hands. Here, clean them first. Let me wipe it up." He took the package from her and tore it open, then scrubbed his hands with it. She found a new one and leaned up to dab at the blood. "How bad is it?" "I think he must have just caught you with his fingernail. You better clean it up good." "Great." He kept thinking about the meal he had with Sonja's parents and his face looking like a roadmap. "What do you want me to do with this?" One of the other officers had the plastic bag of drugs in his rubber glove. "Oh, right. Here." She found an evidence envelope in her trunk. "Stick it in there for now." He dropped it in, snapping off his latex gloves. "You want some help writing it up?" Steve kept dabbing at the scratch with the chemical wipe. "No. Go back to the precinct and wash that up better. I can handle the paperwork." "I'll follow you in case the asshole gets hinky in your backseat." "Oh. Okay, thanks." She called over radio and advised them she'd be transporting a male to the precinct and that Steve's unit would be following her. Steve went back to his car and looked into the rearview mirror at his face. "Shit." 183
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After helping her escort the suspect to the holding cells and taking all the drug paraphernalia carefully out of his pockets with rubber gloves on, Steve headed to the locker room and washed his hands at the sink, then leaned over it to the mirrors. A red line about and inch long arched down his cheek bone. He scrubbed his face with the strong disinfectant soap and then looked for the station master for the first aid kit. When he found him he withstood the peroxide sting and then the bandage with antibiotic ointment on it. "You going to report it?" the station master asked. "What? Report a scratch? No. I wasn't." "What if it gets infected?" "Oh, for crying out loud..." Steve said. "Ask Sgt. Lee." "It's a scratch!" "All right, do what you want." He shrugged and stuffed the kit back into the metal cabinet. Walking to the write up area first, Steve asked Lydia, "You sure I can't at least do the booking sheet?" "Only if you don't feel like heading back out on the street." He checked the time. "Let me write it up." She nodded and moved over allowing him to sit next to her and share the information. After a minute she whispered out of the corner of her mouth, "That Band Aid looks sexy on you." Laughing softly, he whispered back, "Nice try. I look like a dork." "You clean it up good?" "I put everything but fucking ammonia on it." 184
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"Good. That should be enough." "Cox thinks I should report it to Sgt. Lee." "Really? A scratch?" "That's what I said. So, no way, right?" She shrugged. "I don't know. With all the new health and safety crap around here, who knows?" "Is he in the precinct? Did you see him?" "Yeah. He's at his desk. I just screened the arrest with him." "I'll be back." "I'll be here!" He touched the plastic strip on his face and walked around the dividers to the sergeants' area. "Sarge?" When the sarge looked up from his writing he immediately noticed the bandage. "Oh, shit. What happened?" "Suspect scratched my face during the fight with Lydia." "Shit." He opened his file drawer and took out a packet. "It's just a scratch, Sarge." "It doesn't matter. They want all injuries on duty documented." He exhaled tiredly and took out the paperwork. "Geez, it seems a bit much." "Just a CYA exercise, if you ask me. Here. Write the suspect name, case number, everything in here. Then give it to me." "Okay." "Oh, and when you're done. Go home." "Home?" Steve lit up. "Yeah. You got tomorrow off, right?" "Yeah." 185
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"Then finish the paperwork and get out of here." "You're the best, Sarge!" "Yeah, yeah..." He went back to his writing. Steve brought the packet over to Lydia and sat down. "What's that?" She looked over at it. "Oh, you have to be kidding! For a scratch?" "I don't mind now. He said I can go home after." "Oh! Lucky you!" "Well, I was wounded." He smirked. "Yes, wounded defending me ... you're my hero." "And you shouldn't handle drug addicts without a backup!" "I know ... I know..." **** By one AM Steve was home. The minute he came through the door he headed to his room to strip and then stood in a scalding shower allowing the hot water to hit his face. Once he had scrubbed clean, he looked at the cut in the mirror dabbing more peroxide on it, wincing at the burn. Standing back to assess the damage, he gave up. Knowing there was nothing he could do about it, Steve headed to bed.
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Chapter Fourteen Sonja sipped a cup of coffee in her violet robe and slippers, pouring over the legal briefs that she had spread out over the dining room table. Chelsea was in her leotard in the living room doing Pilates to a video. When the phone rang Sonja shouted, "I got it!" and headed to the kitchen. "Hello?" "Hi, babe." "Hi, Steve. You all excited for our big night?" "Yeah. I'm okay about it. Look, I was wondering, since I have all day off, can we spend some time together during the day as well?" "You can stop by ... I'm working on some things for the office, but I can spare a few hours before my hair appointment at two." "You sure? You don't sound too enthused." "No! Come over! I'm just a little bleary-eyed from a lousy night's sleep." "How come you slept poorly?" "A number of reasons, but I swear, I was having premonitions something bad had happened to you." "Really?" "Yes! You have got to find another line of work, Officer Miller!" "Is that Steve?" Chelsea shouted from the living room, out of breath. 187
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"Yes!" Sonja shouted back. "It's your admirer," she whispered to Steve. "Tell him I said hi!" "She says, hi." Sonja refreshed her coffee cup from the pot in the kitchen. "I can't believe she's a lawyer. She's just such an airhead." "You ever see Legally Blonde?" "Oh ... you're joking." "No. I swear it. She knows her shit, Steve. Anyway, come over. We'll play a little before my appointment." "I'm on my way!" She hung up and went to the refrigerator for some milk, returning to the table to read. A few moments later, Chelsea appeared, catching her breath and dabbing sweat from her forehead with a terry cloth wristband. "You seeing him today?" "He's on his way now." "Cool!" Sonja glanced at her from over her coffee mug. "Don't do anything stupid." "Like what?" Chelsea flicked back her hair. "Like strut around here without clothing—like what!" "It wouldn't matter, Sonja, I know he's not interested." "Good." She went back to her reading. "Believe me! I tried!" About to ask her what she was talking about, Sonja just shook her head as she left to take a shower. **** 188
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Turning the music up as he drove, Steve sung 'Nobody loves you like I do', by Emerson, Lake, and Palmer and wove his way to Van Nuys. He parked in front of their house. Chirping his alarm, Steve hopped up the front stairs and rang the doorbell. As it opened he found a smiling grin. "Hello, Chelsea." "Hello, Officer Miller." She opened the door and gave him a good once over. "Man, you look even better out of uniform." "Uh, where's Sonja?" "In the dining room. She's been reading case law all morning. Only took a break to shower and change, otherwise she'd still be in her robe and slippers." He moved through the living room looking for her. "Nice ass!" Ignoring the comment, Steve poked his head around the corner. "Hello, gorgeous..." Sonja blinked her eyes and set the paperwork down. "Hiya ... oh, I love you in those tight faded jeans." She rose up, hugging Steve. He kissed her lightly, smiling in pleasure. "What happened?" She backed up and looked at the cut. "When did you get that?" Her hand hovered over it as if she wanted to touch it to make it feel better. "Nothing. Just a scratch." He rubbed her arms warmly and wiggled his hips against hers. "I knew it. I told you I had a dream something happened to you last night!" "It's nothing!" "What happened?!" She crossed her arms over her chest. 189
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"Just a little scrap with a suspect." "A little scrap." "Yes. Forget about it." "I don't want you in that job! I don't want you in that job!" she shouted. "Shhh ... kiss me." Loving the feel of her in his arms, Steve ran his lips to her jaw, then nibbled on her earlobe near her gold hoop earring. "Oh, you feel so good ... I've missed you." "Mmm," Sonja wrapped her arms around him and held tight. Rocking her side to side, Steve opened his eyes and noticed the paperwork on the table. Sonja smiled and set back to look at him, then realized he was reading her work. "Hey! What are you doing?" She twisted around and started gathering up the sheets. "Where did you dig up all that junk on those witnesses? Come on, Sonja! Are you making up shit just to discredit them? Why do you want to let that animal back out on the streets! Did you see him? Do you know what those tattoos mean?" "I can't talk about it! Steve, it's official misconduct if we discuss the case." She slid the files into her briefcase and zipped it up. "I can't believe this!" Steve said. "I work my ass off trying to get them in jail, and you work yours off trying to get them out!" "I knew this would happen!" Biting his tongue, he forced himself to stop talking. 190
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He pivoted on his heels, clenching and unclenching his fists over his frustration as she watched him. Sonja set the briefcase on the floor, leaning it against the doorframe and asked, "You want some coffee or anything?" "Ya got a beer?" "A beer?" She laughed, then noticed he wasn't joking. "No. We have wine. Neither of us really drink beer. You want to go out and buy a six pack?" "No. Come here." She took a small step towards him. He reached out for her hand, then led her out of the dining room through the living room and passed a blonde couch potato, and up the stairs. When he stood on the top landing he realized he had no idea which room was hers. She smiled at his dilemma and tugged him in the right direction. The curtains were pulled back and the sunlight blazed through the glass panes. The bedspread was shimmering gold with a mixture of silver and black throw pillows on it, each one covered in beads and tassels. Pale teak furniture, clean of scrolls and inlaid lines, with polished brass knobs seemed to glitter in the sunshine. On the walls were framed drawings of costume designs, hand colored and signed. As he took in the contrast of hues and shadows, he looked for some clue as to the deep dark secrets of his lover. His hand still being held and the force behind it leading him to the bed, Steve became distracted from reality. She sat down and stared up at him curiously. With his sharp police senses he was looking for evidence of her past 191
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and he knew she knew what he was up to. Very gently she smoothed her hand down that faded denim of his zipper. He snapped back to the present and gazed down at her large brown eyes. "It's not here." "What's not here," he asked, puzzled. "Whatever you're looking for." Taking off his waist pack, he set it on the dresser, then coaxed her to lie back on the bed and spread out comfortably along side her. Yearning to touch her, he used his knuckle to caress her soft cheek, staring into her gaze as if trying to communicate his desires. When she unbuttoned his jeans he peeked down at her hands. The zipper parted at her insistence and then she reached inside and hunted him down. Finding his cock hard and pressed against his thigh, she urged it upright and revealed it from his clothing. Next she pushed back his shirt tails to get a good look at his abdomen. Letting her do as she wished, Steve waited, only lightly caressing her hair and face as he reclined back on the bed. He was wondering what she was thinking as she stared at his exposed body. Did the golden shade of his tanned summer skin against the color of his pale pelvis enthrall her for some reason? Using her pink polished nails she danced over the line of hair that led to his pubis, then over that rock hard cock to the tip, and down to the base again. He resisted the urge to jump on top of her and get them naked, trying to savor the tantalizing contact. 192
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At first she just stroked it with her fingertips, teasing it, then she wrapped her palm around his cock and squeezed as she pulled on it making him shiver and open his lips to gasp. "Steve, you know I want to make love to you..." "Mmmm?" he replied, closing his eyes. "...but I just love the way you feel in my hands, the contrast of that light sky blue denim to your skin tone, and that expression on your face ... oh, baby, it makes me so excited ... I just wanted to watch you." She started massaging under the head of his cock, pulling on the slipping skin slowly, then increasing her speed and tightening the grasp on him to make his breathing deepen and his chest rise and fall rapidly. He hissed her name and whispered, "You'll make me come if you keep doing that." "That's the idea, sugar..." He stopped holding back and gasped, his hips thrusting forward and his fingers gripping the bedspread. He heard her breath catch in her throat as he came. Slowing her hand down to a leisurely pace, she loosened her grip and just massaged him again as she did in the beginning. Along the line of hair of his belly were creamy white spatters. She dipped her index finger into one and made a light swirl patter on his tight skin. Very slowly he opened his eyes and found her looking down wistfully at his cock where the cum that had been released from it. The tenderness of the moment wasn't lost on him. Though he had not come inside her, the closeness, 193
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the trust between them was so intense, it gave him an emotional lump in his throat. When she tilted her head to the door, he asked, "What is it?" "I thought I heard the doorbell." "You expecting someone?" "No." "Maybe it's a friend of Chelsea's." **** "Is she here?" "Harry! Yes, she is! Did she know you were coming over?" "No. Where is she?" "Hang on! Sit in the living room and I'll get her. Okay? Sit there!" She made sure he didn't head to the stairs and then flew up them herself. "Sonja?" She knocked. "What is it?" "Your brother is here." "My brother? What the hell does he want?" She looked down at Steve and said, "Through that door is my private bath. You can clean up there. Stay here and let me see what he wants. Okay?" He nodded and leaned up on his elbows as she left, closing the door behind her. **** When she came down the stairs he was waiting at the bottom with his arms crossed over his chest. "What do you want, Harry?" 194
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"I came here to talk some sense into you!" "Don't you even start on me!" she warned, pointing her finger into his face. "Then it's the truth? You're seeing a nasty white cop? Have you lost your mind, Sonja!?" "I haven't lost my mind, and if you don't shut up, you'll get a fat lip!" "I can't believe my ears!" He flailed his arms around in rage. "My own sister, sleeping with 'the man'! A white-nastyLAPD pig! I thought I was hearing things! I thought it couldn't be true! What happened to you and Frank!?" "Frank slapped me!" "As well he shoulda! I have a mind to slap some sense into you myself! I can't believe Mom and Dad don't kill you!" "They have some brains, Harry! You never use yours!" "Brains? You think you have brains? Wait till this gets out! You think you'll get anyone trusting you to defend them? Sonja, you are completely out of your mind! No one will work with you!" "Look who's talking about work! First you think you're going to be some superstar ball player! And when that failed you think now you can be an actor! You tell me who's completely out of their mind!" "We're not talking about me here!" "You're twenty-six years old and you still have your mama supporting you! Don't you tell me how to live!" "Just until I get my big break! And we're not talking about me here! Sonja! I'm embarrassed to have you as my sister! You're a traitor! You've turned white on me!" 195
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"Oh, shut up! White on you ... you sound like an idiot! A complete idiot! If you had your life together then maybe you'd be even slightly credible! But you're just a big baby living off our parents' income!" "Stop changing the subject! I came here to talk some sense into you before everyone you know and work with runs a mile when you walk through the door!" "You're the one I wish would run a mile! I don't care what you think, Harry! Get it through your head!" "You aren't serious about this cop! Tell me it's just for a fling! To see what a white dick is like! Or just to get some inside info! You cannot be really dating him!" "A fling? A fling? I'll fling you! You have a nerve judging me! That dimwit Althea didn't open her mouth once at Daddy's dinner! Why? I'll tell you why! She's so thick she can't manage to put words together for a sentence! Right? At least my man's got a brain!" "Your man? He's The Man, Sonja! The fucking enemy! He'll hurt you! He'll call you nasty names eventually! When you fight, that'll be in your face! You'll see! You think he can stop himself from throwing it in your black face?" "Watch me." They both spun around when they heard Steve's voice. "You didn't tell me he was here!" Harry shouted in rage. Sonja went to him and held his hand. When Harry witnessed it he shook his head in frustration. "You're both mad. I'm telling you it's a mistake!" "I would never hurt your sister, Harry. Never." "That's real easy to say!" 196
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"No. It's real easy to do. In time you'll believe me. I can't help the way you feel now." Harry made a move to the door. "You'll regret this, Sonja. Mark my words you'll regret ever getting involved with the likes of him." "I only have one regret, Harry." She waited until he met her eye. "That my brother is a racist pig." Giving them both a last glare of hatred, Harry stormed his way out of the house. Chelsea, who had been hovering in the corner, closed the front door quietly and wiped her forehead off with an exaggerated, "Phew!" Steve felt Sonja's body deflate against him from the relief of him leaving. He wrapped his arm around her, then embraced her tightly against his body. "Hurdle after hurdle," Steve sighed unhappily. "Look, we knew it wouldn't be easy." "You know, that's what makes me so angry. Why can't it be easy? If we were the same damn race, no one would make an issue of it. Christ, it's the twenty-first century! People, grow up!" he thundered. "I like you both," Chelsea squeaked. They turned to look at her shy smile. "Now..." Chelsea corrected, "...I like you both together now ... now that I'm not jealous anymore. You know what I mean?" Steve exchange smiles with Sonja, then laughed. "Ohh, my love, life is just not easy." "No, Steve. I could have predicted that." 197
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"I'm afraid we have a hurdle a hell of a lot bigger than Harry to get over yet." "Your dad?" "Yes." Steve held her against his chest and rocked her. Biting her nail, Chelsea said, "Anything I can do?" "No. But thanks, Chel." Sonja smiled at her. **** "Right, so pick me up at about seven and we'll meet them at the restaurant." "Okay, babe." Steve stood on the porch steps as Sonja waited to say good-bye. "That suit I wore for you on our night out on Monday, was that okay?" "The dark one?" "Yes." "What color shirt and tie?" "Uh, white shirt, maroon tie?" "Okay. It'll do for now, but we do need to go clothes shopping." She smiled. "I'm sorry. A sense of design is not something I can put on my resume'." "Don't worry, honey, help is on the way." "You sure that suit is good enough? I can buy another." "Don't be silly. You look very handsome in it." "Real handsome, with this fricken' marred face." He pointed to his scratch. "Don't worry." She ran her hand through his light brown hair reassuringly. "Okay, let me go to the salon." "Okay. Enjoy it. See you later." 198
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"Bye!" Chelsea waved from behind Sonja. He waved back and they both watched him climb into his truck and leave. "He could have hung out here while you were at the beauty salon, Sonja." Sonja turned to look at her in her skimpy shorts and top. "Yeah, right. Don't you ever give up?" "What...?" Chelsea pouted innocently. Shaking her head, Sonja found her car keys and purse. "See ya later." "Bye!" **** Ironing his shirt and slacks in between dabbing more peroxide on his cut face, Steve's nerves were getting the better of him. Checking the time repeatedly, pacing, imagining getting drunk, he hadn't felt this anxious since his oral board exams for the police force. He decided not to wear his gun for the night. Opening a metal locker under his bed, he placed the magazine separate from the pistol, took the one loaded round out, cocked the slide back and pulled it apart. Once it was in pieces, he locked the safe and shoved it back under the bed, dropping the key in his dresser drawer. Steve hoped he wouldn't need it. He headed to the shower and began his ritual for getting himself ready for this special night out. Wishing he had a luxury car instead of an SUV truck, Steve pulled up in his spot in front of Sonja's house and checked his face in his rear view mirror. Other than the marring scratch, 199
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he looked all right. Cursing at having it so blatantly on his face, he tried to forget it and pocketed his keys as he hopped out of the rig. **** "He's here!" Chelsea shouted as she watched him walk up to their door. "Sonja, he is so gorgeous in that suit!" "Girl, you need a life!" Sonja laughed and took a last look at her hair and reapplied her lipstick. Chelsea sat back on the couch and stared at Sonja wistfully. "You look fantastic, Sonja." "Thanks, Chel. Oops! That's the doorbell!" "You want me to get it?" "Yeah, go on." She stood back and waited. "Hi, Steve!" **** "Hi, Chelsea. No plans for tonight?" He stepped inside. "I may go out with the girls." He was about to reply when he turned his head, seeing Sonja. He stared at her with his mouth hanging open. Smiling at the reception, she batted her eyelashes at him. "Hello, Officer Miller." "Oh, my God ... I'm the luckiest fucker in the world." He hurried over to her and kissed her cheek. "You look amazing." Steeling a peek at her shimmering tight dress, Sonja grinned up at him slyly. "You like?" "I like!" He brought his hips closer to rub against her. "You guys are so cute together!" 200
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Hearing the spectator, they restrained their eager hands and took a step back. "Right, ready?" Steve asked. "Let's go." Sonja headed to the door on her high spiked heels. Steve opened it for her and then held out his elbow to escort her to his vehicle. "Bye, you two! Good luck!" "I'll need it!" Steve shouted back and smiled. Once he hoisted Sonja gently into the seat, he went around the driver's side and paused before he started the car. "What is it?" "You're too good for me, Sonja. Who am I kidding? Your parents are right." "Steve..." She reached out her hand to his and clasped it tightly. "Stop being so nervous. Everything will be all right." "What are you doing with me? You can have any man in LA." "I don't want any man in LA. I want you. Now stop being so silly and let's go." He started the ignition and muttered, "They'll hate me. I am so not good enough for their daughter." "Stop ... shush. You are good enough. Steve, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me, and they'll see that. The important thing is how we feel about each other." Biting his lip, he headed to the restaurant. The elegance of the surroundings hung in the air as the sound of crystal and silver tinkled from the flower-laden tables around them. Steve was already out of his depth and hoped his inadequacy didn't show—like the cut on his face. 201
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Inhaling for courage, knowing he'd rather race into a burning building than meet these people, Steve squeezed her hand mercilessly and whispered, "You'll help me get through this, right?" "You will do just fine," she assured him. The host met them and Sonja asked, "Are Mr. and Mrs. Knight here yet?" "Yes, miss. Right this way." She smiled at Steve in excitement. They followed the host into the dining area. **** "You just behave yourself and don't give the poor man the third degree." "Behave myself? Harold, I'm going to see if this man is good enough for my Sonja. Don't you tell me what I should and should not do." "Oh, look, there's Sonja now." "Is he with her?" "Yes, he's behind her." Mrs. Knight stretched her neck over some other patrons to get her first look at this mystery cop. **** "Mama, Daddy, this is Steve. Steve Miller." Harold stood up, reaching for Steve's outstretched hand. "So nice to meet you, Mr. Knight." "Harold, please. No need to be so formal." "Mrs. Knight." Steve extended his hand. 202
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"Nice to meet you, Steven. Please, call me Leticia." She clasped it and smiled. "Sit down." Steve sat next to her and whispered, "Are you sure you're her mother and not her sister?" "Oh! I see we have a silver tongue among us!" She laughed. "I'm serious. I can see where Sonja gets her incredible beauty from." Seeing her pretty mother melt instantly, Sonja squeezed Steve's hand in approval. "You sure you're a police officer?" Leticia teased, "Because I like you!" Steve laughed softly. "I wish I wasn't sometimes. But, it's not like a tattoo. The uniform comes off." "Well said, young man." Harold smiled at him. "Thank you, sir. Sonja has told me so much about you both. She's very proud of you." "She's told us a lot about you as well." Leticia leaned towards him. "You are a very handsome man, Steven." "Except for this," he said, pointing to his face. "I feel like a kid that's come in from a schoolyard. I haven't had a cut on my face since I was five." "He got that fighting with a suspect, Mama." Sonja thanked the waiter for the menu. "Oh, that's terrible." She shook her head sympathetically. "We do forget how dangerous it is for the young men and women of the department. I know Sonja worries about you every day." 203
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Steve smiled at Sonja lovingly and tightened his hold on her hand. "I know. She's great that way." Leticia and Harold exchanged looks. "So," Harold said, "How long have you been a police officer?" "Less than a year." Steve took the menu and thanked the waiter. "Order us a bottle of wine, Harold." "Okay, dear." He looked over the wine menu. Steve listened to his choice and wondered what you had to do to get an education in wine selection. "Do you like red wine, Steve?" Leticia asked. "Yes. Yes, I do." "Harry came to see me this afternoon..." Sonja read the menu curiously. "He opened his big mouth and made a scene. Steve was there and I was so embarrassed by it." "It's okay," Steve whispered to her. "No! It's not okay! Mama, now that you've met Steve you can see what kind of a man he is. Can you tell that Harry to keep his big mouth shut?" "I'll try, but you know your brother." "Daddy, talk to him. He's going to make a nuisance of himself now." "I'll have a word with him, Sonja. Don't worry about your brother." "Thank you, Daddy." She smiled in triumph and leaned on Steve's shoulder to look at his menu. "What will you have?" "I don't know. There're so many things to choose from." 204
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"They make a great rib eye steak here, Steve. I highly recommend it." "Thanks, Harold ... I..." "I like the halibut," Leticia whispered to him behind her menu. "Right, the halibut." Steve nodded. "Let the man decide!" Sonja scolded them. When the waiter arrived with their wine, Harold took a look at the label, then nodded. It was opened and a small glass was poured. He sipped it and nodded again. Everyone was given a glass full. "Are you ready to order or should I come back?" "I think we're ready. Sonja? Are we ready?" "Yes, Daddy." When they got to Steve, he said, "I'll take the halibut," and winked at Leticia. She grinned as if she loved the attention. After they handed their menus back, Sonja looked at her mother and said, "Come with me to the ladies' room." "All right." She set her napkin down on the table. "Be back." Sonja waved. The moment they were gone, Harold said, "It's time for your critique." "Oh?" Steve had a feeling that's what they were up to. "Fingers crossed I passed the test." "Not to worry. So, tell me, what's your opinion of the LAPD?" **** 205
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Pushing the door back to the ladies lounge, Sonja stepped past a few women who were powdering their noses in the mirrored glass. When she could she spun around and said, "Well? What do you think of him, Mama?" Seeing her daughter's shining eyes, Leticia decided not to tease her. "He's a very nice young man." "See! I knew once you met him you would like him." She took her compact out of her purse and dabbed the shine on her nose and forehead. "He's wonderful, Mama. You think Daddy likes him?" "I do. He's a very sweet young man." "And smart too. He's very bright." "You really care what we think about him, don't you?" "I do. It means a lot to me that you like him. We're all too close a family to have something like that come between us." Leticia kissed her daughter's cheek. "Come on, let's get back out there." "Thanks, Mama." "Go on, Lord knows what your father is up to." **** "...and you know, Harold, even with the extended diversity training, there's no way to weed out all the bad apples on the department. But it isn't for lack of trying on the administration's part." When Steve noticed Harold staring at something behind his back, he realized the women were coming back to the table. Politely, they both stood up as Sonja and her mother sat back down again. 206
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"Is he picking your brain about the police department?" Leticia put her napkin back on her lap. "Harold, leave the man alone." "I just am interested in the prospective of a white officer who's in the rank and file." "I don't mind, Leticia. Honestly. It's a great police force. Everyone there is really trying to make a difference. Like I was saying to Harold, there're always just a few bad ones that you have to weed out. Unfortunately, they make a bad name for the rest of us." "It is a shame." Leticia sipped her wine. "What type of designing do you do, Leticia?" Steve felt Sonja reach for his hand under the table and clasped it tight again. "I design costumes for the theater." "Do you?" He turned to look at Sonja, and asked, "Were those prints on your bedroom wall your mother's?" "Yes! You noticed them?" Sonja asked. "I did. I thought you'd bought them from a dealer or something." Steve turned back to Leticia. "I'm very impressed." "Why, thank you." Leticia smiled. "Have you any projects going at the moment?" "I do. I'm doing the costume design for the stage adaptation of Jane Eyre." "A period drama, wow. You have your work cut out for you." "I'm looking forward to the challenge." 207
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"What does your father do, Steve?" Harold sipped his wine and then dabbed his lip with the cloth napkin. "He's ... he's a sergeant." Steve noticed Leticia catch her daughter's eye in suspicion at the way he had answered. Sonja quickly looked away. "I see," Harold said, "Do you work with him?" "No. I'm stationed in Van Nuys, nights. He's over in Rampart, days." "Have you met his parents, Sonja?" Leticia asked sharply. "Not yet, Mama. Soon." She finished her wine and Steve offered to pour her more. "Do they know you're dating Sonja, Steve?" "My mother and sister know." Steve sipped the wine, trying not to make a bitter face and not succeeding, knowing Sonja's mother had just found their Achilles' heel. "Oh, I see." Leticia's expression dropped. "Change the subject, please, Mama." Sonja looked for the waiter and their food anxiously. After a moment, Steve said, "I'm not proud of my father, Leticia. On the contrary." She didn't answer, only waited for him to finish his thought. "He's a sick, bitter man, who isn't worthy of licking the dirt from under Sonja's shoes." "Steve..." Sonja chided, nudging his arm nervously. "I can't help that he's an ignorant fool. I can only learn from his mistakes and try to be a better human being for it." "What's he going to do to my Sonja when he finds out?" Leticia asked in suspicion. 208
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"He won't do anything. If he so much as looks at her the wrong way he'll regret it." "He's your father, Steven," Harold whispered. Steve met his eyes. "I know. And I admire him in some ways. But in this respect we will never see eye to eye. I am fiercely protective of Sonja. I will never allow anyone to hurt her. Even my own father. No! Especially my own father." "All right. Enough." Sonja patted Steve's thigh under the table. In the silence that followed, the waiter appeared and began setting their plates down. Steve felt Sonja's stare on his profile and knew she could tell that he was deeply hurt by the conversation and taking it very personally. "The food looks good!" She tried to lighten up the atmosphere. "Steve, here, try my salmon." He tilted to her and found a fork full of food being offered. When he met her eye he found her tentative smile. Intending on taking the fork from her, she shook her head and offered to feed him. And with a slight blush in his cheeks, he accepted the offer. "Mmm, good! You want to try mine?" When she nodded he loaded up his fork. He fed her and waited. "Mmm! I should have had the halibut!" "I told you it was good!" Leticia scolded. When they all started laughing, Steve felt a little better. But, he knew deep in his heart, that conversation would never be forgotten. **** 209
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Lingering onside the front entrance, Sonja held Steve's hand tightly and sighed, "I never should have had that dessert! I am so full!" "It was hard to resist." Steve smiled down at her, "Like you..." She gave him a quick peck on the lips and then smiled shyly at her parents who were trying not to eavesdrop. "Don't forget, church in the morning, Sonja." Leticia gave Harold the ticket stub from the valet parking she had held for him in her purse. "Yes, Mama. I know. I'll be at your house early." "Do you go to church, Steve?" "I did as a young boy, Leticia. But, I haven't in a very long time." "Maybe you can come with us to our church." Before he could answer, Sonja said, "No, Mama, why would he want to come to our church?" "I would love to go with you, Sonja." She turned to look at him. When he read the incredulous look on her face he smiled, nodding his head. "I would. I would go with you anywhere, Sonja. And if church is an important part of your life, I want to be a part of it." "That's very sweet, Steve, but, maybe next time." Leticia noticed their car was being parked in front of the restaurant and Harold was thanking the valet. When she turned back to them she asked her daughter, "Are you coming back to the house for a coffee?" "No, Mama, I'm full. Not tonight." 210
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Leticia watched Steve hand his ticket to the valet. When he was out of hearing range she whispered to her daughter, "You're ashamed to be seen in church with him?" "No!" Sonja reacted defensively, then found her mother's stern expression. "Not ashamed, no. I just think it's too soon. I'll bring him there ... I will, just not yet." "Hmm..." Leticia cocked her eye at her daughter. "Don't look at me like that, Mama. It's too new. Let us get to know each other even better. I'm not ashamed. Look at that man." She gestured to him. "How could you be ashamed to be with a man that looks like that?" "That's exactly what I'd like to know." "Shh, Mama, he and Daddy are both coming over." Harold asked, "Are you two coming back to the house?" "Not tonight, Daddy. Let me get some rest. I'll be by early for church." "All right, Sonja." "It was nice meeting you, sir." Steve held out his hand. "You too, young man. I know we'll be seeing each other again." "I look forward to it." He smiled at Leticia and kissed her cheek. "Goodnight, Leticia." She kissed his in return and rubbed his arm affectionately. "Goodnight, Steve. You be careful out there." "I will." "'Night, Mama, Daddy..." Sonja kissed them both, waving as she walked with Steve to the truck. **** 211
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Once Harold and Leticia were in their car and on their way home, Harold asked, "What do you think of him?" "I think he's a very nice man, Harold. I like him." "But?" "But, I don't think the two of them realize how difficult it's going to be for them." "Oh, I don't know. I think they both have their eyes open, Leticia. Neither of them is naïve and foolish." "What about his father? I don't like some LAPD sergeant having a chip on his shoulder about my daughter. I don't like it one bit." "I'm sure once he meets our lovely daughter, he'll soften up." "Humph! I hope you're right!" **** "How do you think it went?" "I think they like you, Steve. Especially my mother! Oh, you swept her right off her feet." He laughed softly, and squeezed her hand. "I didn't mean to. She's just a really pretty lady. I can't believe how young she looks." "She does look good for her age." "Am I taking you home with me?" "I have to wake up early for church in the morning." "I know. I can get you back early." She looked down at her dress and asked, "Can I take a rain-check?" Feeling disappointed, Steve nodded. "Sure. Okay." 212
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They pulled up in front of her house and Steve shut the engine and lights. He twisted in his seat and stared at her in the dimly lit interior. "Is everything okay?" "Yes. Why?" "I don't know. I just thought maybe some of the things that were said this evening upset you." "Upset me? What was said that upset me?" "Well, about my father, for a start." "Oh, that ... no, I'm not upset. Well, if anything I feel sorrier for you. I don't have that to deal with. You see my parents are very dear people." "They are. You're so lucky, Sonja. I wish mine were normal!" "You can't control anyone but yourself, Steve, so don't get all worked up over it." "No. I know." He reached out for her hand and brought it to his lips to kiss. She scooted closer on the bench seat and caressed his hair back from his face. When he met her eyes he could almost feel the crackle and spark from their attraction. He released her hand and reached for her, bringing her to his lips. Loving the soft, gentle kisses, Steve watched Sonja close her eyes as she seemed to lavish in the strength of his embrace. Smoothing her hand up his muscular thigh, she made her way to his crotch. His cock was rock hard under his slacks. When she touched it he whimpered in longing and spread his legs wider in the confines of the truck's cabin. His kisses 213
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grew more passionate and he dug his hands through her hair and cupped the back of her head, yearning to make love to her and not wanting to let her go, feeling an emotional tidal wave of love for her. She started to slow them down. She kissed his mouth gently, then she set back as if to see his face. The street lamp threw a beam of light against it. From the rear view mirror he could see his cheekbone with the scratched surface was illuminated, and a very thin line of water had run down next to it. She touched that tear and dried it from his skin. "Come inside." Blinking his eyes quickly, he didn't wait for her to repeat it, or change her mind. He swiped his keys from the ignition and jumped out, hurrying around to her side. Holding her waist, he lifted her to the ground and then shut the door, igniting the alarm. With his arm around her shoulders, they hurried up the pavement and to her front door. Once it was unlocked, they rushed through and closed it behind them. Sonja put her finger to her lips to keep him quiet. He nodded and they climbed up the stairs stealthily. At the top landing, Sonja looked into Chelsea's bedroom. "Oh! She's still out carousing. How about that?" Steve checked his watch. "It's only ten thirty. That's pretty early for a Saturday night." "Yes. You're right. It's just that she hasn't been going out recently." "Forget Chelsea..." he whispered, kissing her. Sonja arched her back as he urged her hips to his, his arm tightly clinging to her waist. Then, in one swift movement he 214
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scooped her off her feet and carried her to the bed. After he set her down he removed her shoes gently and kicked his off, sliding his jacket down his arms, he opened his tie and top shirt button. "Get naked for me," she whispered. Instantly a smile found his lips. He stood back from the bed and opened the rest of the buttons of his shirt. Staring intently as each item of clothing was dropped to the carpet, he watched as she licked her lips in anticipation. Once he was completely naked and about to climb on the bed with her, she rose up and began taking her own outfit off. As he watched, he tossed the throw pillows aside and turned down the bed. "Do you have any condoms?" She nodded and disappeared into the bathroom. He reclined on the bed and waited. Emerging naked, holding the rubber in her fingers, her smile wicked and inviting, he curled his finger at her in invitation. She set the condom down on the nightstand and moved over to the bed to rest her body on his muscular length. Loving her weight on top of him, he opened his arms and legs and wrapped around her like a snake, moaning and inhaling her in pleasure. "Oh, you feel so good!" As if she could vanish into his masculine grip, she nuzzled her face against his neck and kissed his hot skin. "You smell delicious." "Mmm ... you, too," he purred and sniffed at her neck hungrily.
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"I could crawl on this body all night!" She groaned, wiggling on him. "You must be very strong, babe ... I can't believe the size of you." "I'm just a pussy cat." "I know." She ran her hand through his hair and leaned up over him to see his eyes. "My pussy cat." "Grrr." "Make love to me." His silly grin dropping to an expression of complete seriousness, he breathed, "I love you so much, Sonja." "I love you too, Steve." "Marry me." She burst out laughing at the joke, then gazed down at him to see he wasn't smiling. "Say you will." "Steve ... I've known you a month." "It's long enough. I can't bear the thought of not being with you." "We have time. Let's just enjoy what we have now." He spun her over so he was on top, then found the rubber and slid it on. Feeling her legs part for him, he knelt over her and pushed in, closing his eyes at the rush. "Make me come, Steve ... make me come." "My pleasure, Sonja ... my pleasure." He rested on his elbows and began his slow rhythmic thrusting. "That's it, baby ... oh you do that sooo good..." Grinding his teeth, Steve distracted his thoughts just enough to keep him from climaxing too soon. 216
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And with the word 'marriage' swirling through his head, he hoped Sonja was imagining this kind of love-making every night for the rest of her life. "I can live with that..." she whispered suddenly as if reading his thoughts. "Hmmm?" "Nothing. Keep going, babe." "I'm going..." He kissed her neck softly. As it rushed through her she gasped and her breathing deepened. He watched, enthralled as she savored the aftershocks, then she opened her eyes and smiled wistfully at him. "Good?" he asked. "Oh yes..." "My turn?" She wrapped her legs around him and grinned. "Your turn." He leaned up higher and started thrusting his hips deep and fast. She stroked his chest, pinching his erect nipples and watched his face as she did. In mere seconds he was grunting and hanging his head, his eyes clamped shut. He dropped his body weight down on her and caught his breath as she rubbed his back in comfort. Slowly he leaned up and tried to hide from her as he wiped his face with his hands. "Steve..." "Sorry." He was humiliated by the tears and had no idea why he couldn't control them while he was with her. "What's wrong?" 217
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"I think it's just because I love you so much. I know it sounds lame—" "No, it sounds wonderful." She moved his hand back to see his face. "I ... I don't want to pull out." She smiled sweetly. Reluctantly he disengaged his hips and sat back staring down at the used condom on his cock. She reached to her night table and popped a few tissues out, then very lovingly removed it for him. "Come here." He crawled back on top of her and wrapped his arms around her, hiding his face in her pillows. "Don't worry," she whispered, petting his hair and neck. "Everything will work out..."
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Chapter Fifteen While he sipped a cup of coffee reading the Sunday paper which was delivered to her door, Steve heard someone coming into the living room. "Hello...!" She peeked around the wall. "Hiya, Chelsea. Good night out?" "Steve! Did you stay over?" "I did." "Where's Sonja?" She read Peanuts over his shoulder. "Getting ready for church ... here, you want the funnies?" "No. I really need to shower and get cleaned up. Are you going with her?" She nodded to his suit pants and white shirt. "No. This is from last night." "Oh, yeah ... how did it go with Mom and Dad?" "Okay, actually. It went pretty well." "I'm not surprised. Her parents are great." When she dropped down across from him in a chair he could see her eye liner was a little smeared and her hair wasn't at its best. "What did you get up to last night?" "I met someone..." She grinned devilishly. "Yeah? Did you sleep in the damn car?" He laughed at her. "No!" She hit him. "In the car ... I'm not a slut! I slept in his bed." "Slept with him on the first night, tsk, tsk..." He sipped his coffee, smiling at her over it. "Yeah ... we couldn't help ourselves. You know how it is. He couldn't keep his hands off me. Most guys can't." 219
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"Uh huh..." "You're the exception, Officer Miller." "Oh well." He grinned at her. "So, Sonja's going to church ... you off today?" "I am. I'm off for today and tomorrow." "What are you guys going to do together?" "I don't know. We haven't gotten that far yet." Sonja descended the stairs, checking her purse and its contents and set it by the front door. "Hey, Sonja." Chelsea smiled at her when she came into the room. "You always look so pretty for church. So angelic." "She looks pretty in anything." Steve reached for her. "Only Jackie-O looks better in a pillbox hat." "Thanks, Chel ... so? You about ready?" Steve stood and set his cup in the sink, then stuffed his tie into his pocket and folded his jacket over his arm. "Yup." Chelsea followed them to the door. "Maybe we can all go out together tonight." Sonja lifted her purse up and then said, "You mean us three?" "No! Four! I want you to meet Michael!" "Who on earth is Michael?" Sonja nodded for Steve to open the door so they could leave. "My new beau! Come on, Sonja, it'll be fun!" "Uh, we'll let you know." Sonja waved to her and Steve escorted her to her car. When they had gone out of Chelsea's hearing range, Sonja snorted, "Her new beau? She mean her one night stand?" 220
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"No doubt." Steve noticed Chelsea had closed the door and vanished behind it. "So, are you going to call me when you get out of church?" "We usually go to a café after with some of Mom and Dad's friends." "Uh huh..." "I don't know what time we'll be finished." "It doesn't matter. I have my mobile. Just call me whenever you get through." "All right." "Do you want to see me tonight?" Steve hated when she became evasive. "I have a little work to do before tomorrow..." "Does that mean no?" "I'll call you and let you know." "Sonja, I'd like to see you on my days off. You know how hard it is to get together when I'm on shift." "I know ... I'll call you." She pecked his lips and climbed into her car. As she drove away he waited until he couldn't see her tail lights any longer, and then scuffed his heels to his truck. **** Seeing him in her rear view mirror as she left, Sonja had some anxiety in the pit of her stomach that they were moving too quickly. When he talked about marriage after only a mere month of dating, she began to panic and feel as if she was losing control. All she wanted to do was slow them down so she could think. 221
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**** On their walk up the path to the church, Sonja whispered to her mother, "There's Frank, Mama. I don't want to see him." "Where? Oh, I want to give him a piece of my mind." "Let's avoid him, Mama..." She turned around and shouted, "Daddy? We're going inside." He nodded and shook the hand of the gentleman he was speaking to, then followed them into the church. Sonja looked over her shoulder in paranoia and then directed her mother to an open pew. She slid in and picked up a bible, then noticed her father and mother were once again caught in a conversation before they had a chance to sit next to her. As the congregation filled the room, Sonja spotted a mixed race couple. A black man and a white woman were just sitting down together on the opposite side of the aisle. She had never noticed them before. When someone sat next to her, she turned to find Frank's condescending grin and growled, "Get away from me, Frank!" "So ... Miss Defense Attorney is sleeping with a white LAPD pig. You thought you could keep it a secret but you can't." "I said, get away from me!" "The word is out, Sonja. All your black colleagues know. And once they know, business will dry up. You think you hold any credibility now? They see you as a traitor. You've succumbed to the white man." "Shut up, Frank. You make yourself sound more of a fool than usual." 222
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"Do I? I don't think so, Sonja. There's only one fool sitting in this church here, and it ain't me." "You better not let Mama see you. She'll give you a fat lip after what you did to me." "I'm leaving. I don't want to be seen with you. Last thing I want is for your nasty bed habits to influence the way people see me!" "Too late for that, Frank! They already see you as a nasty habit!" As if she had overheard her daughter's comment, Leticia spun around to look at them. When she caught sight of Frank she stormed over. "Get away from my daughter! No one hits my Sonja!" Frank stood and faced her. "If you think my little slap will hurt her, you're in for one big shock with her new love interest." "I happened to have met him, and he's a better man than you could ever hope to be." "You tell him, Mama." "You know his father is one of the worst racists in the department? And if you ask me, the apple never falls far from the white poison tree." "Why don't you just leave, Frank, and take your talk of poison with you!" "I'm going, Leticia, but don't say I didn't warn you!" Frank took a last sneering glance at Sonja. "You'll come running back to the black community with egg on your face, Sonja, when you find out what that man is really like." "Get lost, Frank!" Sonja said, trying not to raise her voice. 223
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After he left Leticia sat down next to her and reached for her hand to comfort her. "You ignore him, Sonja. He's just a jealous man." Sonja nodded, gazing down at the bible on her lap. **** Steve was in his running outfit and checked the time. He knew if he waited another few minutes he'd once again catch her coming out of the church. Pacing, wearing a path through the living room rug, he cursed under his breath in frustration, and left, finding a new route to run. **** When Sonja stepped out into the sunshine she looked around the surrounding streets for Steve. Purposely moving beyond the crowd, she stood back and shielded her eyes from the glare and checked her watch. "What are you looking for?" Leticia asked when she caught up to her. "Huh? Oh, Steve runs this way on his exercise route. I just thought he'd be around when we came out." "Why didn't you invite him to church? There are other white people in the congregation, Sonja." "I know. Funny, I never noticed them before. There's even a mixed couple." "Yes. Everyone is welcome. You don't have to keep him out." "I didn't mean to do that, Mama." "What is it, child?" She reached out for her. 224
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"I'm afraid." Sonja dabbed at her eyes before a tear rolled down. "Of what?" "Of the way I feel about him." Leticia smiled kindly. "He ... he mentioned marriage last night, Mama, and I almost made a dash for the door." "You don't feel that way about him?" "No. I do. That's just the problem. I just think about all the issues we'll have to deal with. It's all too complicated, Mama." "Hush ... don't get yourself into a state." She put her arm around her shoulder. "Life is complicated for everyone, Sonja. You just deal with each day as it comes." "But, I think of it from every angle ... my job, his job, his family, our religious backgrounds, our cultural backgrounds ... it's just a never ending list of problems." "None of those problems are insurmountable. You're both very bright people and no matter what comes up, you'll manage." "Do you believe that, Mama?" Leticia used her tissue to dab at Sonja's eyes. "Yes. I do." Sonja embraced her. "Thank you, Mama." "Shhh, don't fret, child. You just don't worry." Sonja nodded, taking the tissue from her mother and wiping her nose. She took one last look around the streets for him, then followed her to their car to go to breakfast. ****
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Drenched in sweat, Steve came through the door and checked his answering machine then his mobile phone. Neither had a message on it. Trying not to curse and grow upset, he walked to the kitchen and removed a bottle of water from the refrigerator, sucking it down thirstily, and then resumed his pacing. The bottle empty, his patience worn, he headed to the shower and stripped off his running gear, stepping under the silver spray. **** Sonja stood out front of the café as her parents said goodbye to the small group of friends. She found her mobile phone and took it out of her purse. When the answering machine picked up, she hung up and tried his mobile phone. When that too had the service pick up, she sighed in irritation and was about to hang up when she decided to leave a message. "Steve? It's me. I'm headed home ... it's..." She checked her watch. "...it's just after noon and I'll be home soon. I don't know where you are, but call me if you get this message. Love you, bye." She hung up and stared at the number on the display. Tossing it back into her purse, she wondered if her indecision about the rest of the day prompted him to make other plans. Angry at herself for not committing to seeing him, she knew she must be in love because whenever he wasn't with her she was in a bad mood wishing he was. ****
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The towel wrapped around his waist, Steve was on his way to his bedroom and veered to the living room to look down at the answering machine again. Nothing. He ground his jaw and stormed to the bedroom to change into fresh clothes, deciding on what he was going to do with his free time. **** Hopping up the front steps and sticking her key in the lock, Sonja closed the door behind her, and shouted out for Chelsea. Hearing nothing in return after seeing her car in the driveway, she shrugged and then checked her answering machine. There were no messages. "Fine! Whatever!" She threw up her hands and climbed the stairs to change. **** Steve sat in his truck at a traffic light and drummed the steering wheel with his fingers waiting for it to change. When it did he noticed a coffee shop and imagined an ice cold latte. He pulled into the lot and parked, then thought about Laura and knew she lived close by. When he turned on his phone it made a signal that indicated he had a message. Hitting the codes and listening to it, he found it was from Sonja but it was over an hour old. "Shit!" He dialed her home number frantically and no one picked up. Disconnecting it, he then tried her mobile. "Sonja!" "Steve? Hang on. Let me pull over." He waited, watching the traffic as it passed by in front of him. "Hi," Sonja said. 227
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"I just got your message now. I'm sorry. I turned off my cell phone when I was home, thinking you'd try there first. Then I must have blanked and forgot to turn it back on again." "I did try your home phone first." "I didn't get any message from you." "I didn't leave one there. I called your mobile after." "Oh ... well, I was out for a run. Or maybe it was when I was in the shower." "It doesn't matter. Where are you?" "At a coffee shop on Ventura Boulevard. Bobby's café. Interested?" "Yes! I'd love a mocha. Which cross street?" "East of Van Nuys, near the college." "I'll be there in five." "Great!" He hung up and felt his mood improve considerably. Shutting down the radio and air conditioning, Steve grabbed his keys and jumped out, locking it up and then whistled a happy tune as he stood in front of it and looked for her car. After ten minutes he spotted her at the traffic signal and smiled in delight. She waved and pulled in, parking opposite his truck. His heart exploding in his chest at the sight of her, he hurried to open her door for her and then stood back as she got out. "Oh, am I glad to see you," he sighed, moved his gun pack to the back of his waist and then hugged her tight. "I thought I'd missed you! I thought you were upset with me." 228
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"What? Never!" He caressed her face and kissed her deeply. The sound of a revving engine and then screeching brakes startled him. He jerked up his head and found the grill of a patrol vehicle snarling at them. Sonja spun around and gasped in shock. "Dad!" Dick Miller jumped out of his car as if he were chasing a bank robber. He stalked his son and his girlfriend with his hand on the butt of his holstered gun. Instinctively Steve shoved Sonja behind him. "Dad, what the hell's the matter with you?!" "I knew it!" Dick spat, "I knew I'd finally find out what you were up to! You disgust me! How can you flaunt your vile attraction in public?! You're a fucking disgrace!" "Go!" He shoved Sonja to get away from him, fearing for her safety as he read the look in his father's eyes. After he shoved her, he held up his hands and tried to distract his father. "You need to calm down, Dad! This is insane!" **** Sonja hid behind one of the cars and called 911 on her mobile phone as the spectators stood back wondering if this police sergeant was dealing with a violent suspect. **** "Insane? You're calling me insane? I could kill you for this! You make me sick! How could you go with one of them, 229
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Steve? Aren't white women good enough for you? You have to scrape the bottom of LA's barrel?" "Take your hand away from your gun, Dad..." Steve knew his own gun was in the waist pack he'd slung behind him and out of reach. As if to intimidate him, Dick used his thumb to open the holster snap. "Now I know why your mother hasn't been the same in days! She walks around as if she's been ill! And you did it to her! You and that black whore!" Bristling at the slur, Steve kept his temper under control and watched that trigger happy hand. "You're killing your mother, Steve! Killing her!" "Don't be ridiculous!" Steve shouted, then from far off he heard sirens. "She's pale and sick now! And I know why! You! You and your pathetic impulses! And that fucking graffiti? You deserved it! Because it's the fucking truth!" When two patrol cars burst into the lot the uniformed men jumped out and stood behind their sergeant in confusion. "Steve?" one of the guys from his academy class shouted. "What the hell's going on?" "My father's gone mental, Dan!" Steve shouted. "Sarge? What's the deal?" "Get the hell out of here!" Dick spat, foaming at the corners of his mouth. "Shit..." The officer backed up and called for a lieutenant to respond immediately. "Dad, your career is going to go into the trash can! Stop this and calm down before they send out a supervisor!" 230
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That hit a chord. Dick turned around to look at four members of his division as they stared in complete shock at him. With his attention diverted, Steve looked for Sonja and found her safe inside one of the shops with several people comforting her as she cried, watching him. "Sarge?" Dan walked over to the bent older man slowly. "Why don't you just calm down? Huh? We'll get Lt. Strong here and he'll figure it out." "The lieutenant? I don't want the fucking lieutenant here! He's black! You stupid SOB! Why did you call him here?" "I ... I..." Dan shrugged, watching Dick's nervous hand still attached to his gun inside the holster. Steve took a step closer, wondering if he could overpower him. When Dick looked up suddenly, Steve froze. Swallowing his fear, Steve said, "Dad ... think of what Mom and Laura will do when they find out ... Mom may be upset, but she'd never want to hurt anyone." "You hurt her, you son-of-a-bitch! You hurt her!" "Not like this will! Dad, use your head! Your career is going down the drain as we speak!" When the gun came out a collective gasp emerged from the spectators and Sonja went crazy, having to be held back by the crowd. Steve held up his hands in defense. "If my career is finished," Dick roared, "It's because of you!"
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Behind his father, Steve found the lieutenant had parked his car out of sight and was walking up to the officers to get updated. "Dad ... we can put all this behind us ... please. I'm sure it's all a misunderstanding. Now, put your gun back into your holster..." Seeing a group of men creeping behind his father, intent on jumping him, Steve kept him distracted, the sweat trickling down his temple. "Dad ... Mom was all right. I spoke to her about it." "When?! More lies, Steve?!" "No! I swear! She wants to meet her! She was okay! She said we'd all get together!" "You're full of shit!" On a silent count of three, four cops jumped on Dick's back and grabbed at the hand with the gun. Steve watched in shocked horror as his father fought for his gun which they pried out of his hand and then the cuffs came out. "No!" He hurried over. "Don't cuff him, please!" Sonja came rushing over and hugged Steve in relief. He held her tight. Lt. Strong made his way over and gave Sgt. Miller a very disappointed shake of the head. The men got him to his feet and held onto his arms from behind. "Dad..." Steve felt his heart break. "It didn't have to come to this..." Sonja wiped at her eyes, the tears running down her face. 232
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Dick finally calmed down. He looked around at all the astonished bystanders, then his own lieutenant and officers. He shook his head, defeated, as if it all suddenly dawned on him. "I'm sorry, son." "Put him in the back of my car." The lieutenant nodded to where he had parked it, then looked at Steve and Sonja sadly. "What are you going to do to him, lieutenant?" "I don't know, Steve. But, I wouldn't count on him keeping his badge." "It'll kill him." Steve wiped at a tear before it fell. "He should have thought of that before he did something so stupid." Steve nodded. "I'll bring him back to the precinct and call the captain. He'll be the one to make the decision." "Okay." He nodded and walked back to his car. Steve tried to compose himself and moved his gun pack back to the front of his body. When Dan approached him he said, "Sorry, Steve." "Yeah. Me too." "Take it easy." Dan waved and climbed into Steve's father's patrol car and followed the slow train of cars to the station. "Oh, fuck..." "What now?" Sonja looked up at him in fear. "The fucking media just arrived. Let's go. Are you okay to drive?" 233
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"Yes." "Go to my place." She nodded and found her keys. Steve waited in his truck for her to leave the parking lot and then followed as the reporters scavenged for whatever was left in their wake. Within a few minutes she arrived, parked, and waited for him as he disregarded the parking garage and left his truck behind her car on the street. Hurrying to her, he cradled her in his arms, found his key, then escorted her to the elevator and waited impatiently as it rose. He could see she was shaking so much she could barely function. Once they were in the confines of his apartment unit, he wrapped around her and rocked her in his arms. "I am so sorry ... oh, my god, I am soooo sorry..." She hiccupped and tried to control her tears. "Please don't hate me for it. Please, stop crying..." Steve felt like retching he was so sick over it. "I ... I don't hate you, Steve. I'm just so glad he didn't hurt you." "He wouldn't. I know him. He's all talk and bravado." "Right." She wiped at her teary eye with her knuckle. "Go splash your face and calm down. Let me find something for you to drink." She kissed him and then went to the bathroom to wash her face. The minute she left the room, Steve picked up the phone and dialed. "Hello? Mom? You would not believe what Dad just did!" he shouted. "He bumped into me and Sonja getting a cup of coffee over on Ventura Boulevard, and went crazy! He pointed a gun at me, Mom!" 234
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"Oh, dear God..." "The lieutenant came to the scene and took him away! He'll lose his job now, Mom! Can you believe that asshole! I told you to talk to him! I told you to tell him about us to get him used to the idea!" **** Sonja heard Steve yelling and looked at her reflection in the mirror over the sink. She dabbed at her running mascara and tried to calm down. **** "...but you didn't! You couldn't help us both out?! See what happened, Ma? You all think you're so damn smart! Well? He'll be lucky if they don't prosecute him!" "You won't press charges!" "I should! But, no, I won't! But, it's up to the captain now! Not me!" "Oh, I have to get to the precinct right away!" "You do that! Maybe now you can knock some sense into the bastard!" "Let me go, Steve..." "Fine!" He slammed the phone down and then noticed Sonja standing there. "You said you have something strong to drink?" She tried to smile. "Yes." Rubbing his face, he walked to the kitchen and started opening up cabinets. Finally he found one with a 235
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bottle of cognac in it. He poured two ridiculously enormous glasses full and then handed one to her. Before she drank it, she whispered, "Please calm down." He led her to the sofa and sat down, then took a very large swallow of the alcohol while she sipped it. "I never thought he'd do that." "It's over now." Sonja rubbed his thigh. "How dare he put you in danger!" "Me?" She laughed sadly. "Yes, you! I don't care what happens to me! But, if he thinks he can—" "Shhh.... please. It's not good to keep getting into a state." "Your parents will kill me. Sonja, it'll find its way to the news and all their fears will be confirmed." "Please stop, Steve." "I can't! What he did was what everyone tried to warn us about! And he's my own flesh and blood! What happens next time if some complete mental threatens us, or harms you just because of our relationship! Sonja, I'd go mad! Remember that asshole in the restaurant? I can't handle the thought of anything happening to you!" "Nothing is going to happen. Steve, I'm not defending your dad, but—" Steve choked at the absurdity, and finished the rest of the cognac with a gulp. "But—he looked really remorseful when they took him away. He knows what he did was very wrong." 236
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"He'd better!" Steve said, slamming the glass down on the table. "If he doesn't think what he did was wrong then there's no fricken' hope left at all!" "He's sick, Steve. He needs help." Steve looked at her expression, then shook his head in awe. "How can you defend him?" "Because it's my job." She gave him a sly smile. "No. Not this time. There is no defense for what he did. And don't you even try to be understanding about it. Think of what your parents will think of me? And him! They will want me to stay away from you! And I should! I can't allow you to be treated that way! Oh, Sonja, I'm sick about it ... sick..." "Yes, my parents will be upset, of course they will. But they know you can't control your father." "But, your mother, last night, remember? She said, what will my horrible father do to you, remember? She knew." "And she knew you would protect me. Which you did." "But, I shouldn't have had to! He shouldn't be such a fucking idiot!" "Will you drink that?" She handed him the glass. He swallowed it down and laid his head back on the couch, shutting his eyes. Taking the empty glass out of his hand, she cuddled against him and rubbed his thigh softly. "Let it go, Steve ... I know it sounds all so terrible now, and it is, but—time is a great healer ... and in a week or a month, we'll be passed it." "Why is he such an idiot..." he moaned. "Even a man like Dick Miller will learn sooner or later, Steve. Sometimes it just takes a very big wake up call." 237
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He opened his eyes and looked at her. "I don't deserve you." She smiled and kissed him. **** "Yes, I'm here to see my husband. Richard Miller." "Oh ... are you his wife?" the desk clerk asked. "Yes." "Hang on." She waited, checking her watch. In a moment the door opened and the captain showed her through. "My son called me. Is Dick all right?" "He's fine. We're just having a chat with him now." When she stepped through the open door she found her husband seated in a chair, hunched over. His skin was red and shining. He had taken off his gun belt, uniform shirt, and bullet proof vest, and was seated in a white t-shirt and his dark slacks. When he heard someone come in he looked up weakly. "I fucked up, Susan." "Oh, Dick..." She rushed to him and sat next to him, holding his hand. "I don't know what got into me. I just snapped." "I should have told you. Steve told me he was seeing Sonja. He asked me to tell you, to warn you. It's my fault, Dick." "No. No, Susan, it's mine. I don't know why I did it. I just snapped. I wasn't thinking." She turned to look at the men in the room, all stern faced and hard. "He's sorry he did it." 238
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The captain answered, "We're sorry too, Mrs. Miller." "He can still do the job. He just needs some time off." They exchanged glances. "No, Susan," Dick sighed, "They can't do that. They have to get rid of me now." "But, you weren't planning on retiring yet, Dick." "I'm taking an early retirement, Susan." "Can I take him home?" she asked. "Yes," the captain answered, then reached out his hand. "I need your badge, Dick, sorry." Dick nodded, then tugged his shirt over to his lap and opened the pin. He took a last look at it, and then handed it to him. "You're free to go. We'll have the investigations panel review it and see if they want any further action." "Yes, sir." He stood tiredly. "Get some rest, Dick. And think about what you did. You've a good son in Steven. He's an excellent worker. I've no doubt the woman is a very nice young lady." "Right." Dick nodded, not meeting anyone's eye. Before he left the lieutenant said, "Get some professional help, Dick." Dick looked up into his face and felt extremely guilty. "Sorry, Lt. Strong. Honest. I didn't mean any offense. It's just the way I was brought up, you know." "It's never too late to change." "No. It isn't." "You don't want to lose your son forever, do you?" "No. No, Lieutenant, I don't." 239
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They opened the door and allowed him to pass. Susan walked him to her car. She opened the door and waited until he sat down, then went to the driver's side. "I'll have Laura get your car later." He nodded. She started the ignition and headed home. As he sat there he mumbled, "I fucked up, Susan. I'm sorry." "We both did, Dick. I think we owe our son an apology." Staring out of the window in a daze, Dick tried not to think about what he'd just done. **** When the phone rang Steve jumped out of his skin and looked at Sonja for her reaction. He peered over at the caller ID. Picking up the receiver Steve said, "Hello." "It's your mother, Steven." "What..." he responded flatly. "Your father is home with me." "Yeah? So?" "He has something to say to you." "What the fuck does he want to do now?" Steve heard her hand over the phone. "Steven?" "What?" "I'm sorry." "Are you? Or are you sorry for yourself?" "No. I'm very sorry for the way I behaved. I feel like a giant ass." 240
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"What the hell were you thinking?" Sonja warned him to calm down with non-verbal cues. "I wasn't thinking. I just snapped. I don't know how I could have done that. I really am sorry, son." "You should be apologizing to Sonja! Not me!" She shook her head in horror and backed up. "I will. I will when I get a chance." "You have one! Here she is!" **** She cringed and looked at the phone in distaste. He nodded his head and handed it to her. "Hello?" she whispered meekly. "Sonja? Sonja, this is Dick, Steve's father. Look, about what I did. I can't apologize enough. I don't know what happened. I just went off. But, I know what I did was wrong. Please. I know you can't forgive me, but just accept my apology to you and to my son." "It was a terrible thing to do to him. He's a good man, Mr. Miller." "I know that. I know he's a good man, and you're most likely a good woman. I just came from a different background ... you know, when I was growing up. My father, well, he wasn't a very tolerant man." "Uh huh..." She nodded, looking at Steve. "...I'm not using that as an excuse, but, it's hard when you've been brought up a certain way ... Look, I'm just sorry. I'll pay for my stupidity with my job. I lost the career I loved." "I'm sorry for you, really." 241
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"You are?" "Yes. I know you must have loved that job." "I did, Sonja. It was my life." "And you love your son, and your daughter." "I do. I don't show it most time, but I do. It's nice of you to say those things." "I'm not a monster, Mr. Miller. I'm a human being. I still have feelings even though my skin is black." "I am so sorry. Please, I can't say it enough. Maybe one day I can make it up to you both. If you'll let me." "It's easy for me to forgive you, Mr. Miller. I'm not the one you betrayed. It's your son who you should be talking to." "Yes. You are right. I know most likely you'll never want to see me again, and I don't blame you, Sonja, but if ever you do, I'd love to take you both out to a nice meal and put this horrible thing behind us." "It's okay with me. I'll let your son decide." "Thank you, Sonja. You really have been more than fair." She handed Steve the phone. **** "What'd he say?" Steve asked, then took it. "Dad?" "She sounds like a lovely girl." "You should have said that before you pointed a loaded gun at us!" "I'm sorry, son ... I'm so sorry." "Good!" "Sonja said she'd let me take you both out for a meal to make it up to you." 242
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"She did?" He looked at her and tilted his head. "Yes. But she said it was up to you. I know what I did was unforgivable, son, and if you never want to see me again, I understand. But, I do want to show you I can change." "You? Change? You having a laugh?" Sonja hit him and he looked at her in annoyance. "I know, son. I know. But, even this old dog can change if he puts his mind to it. I don't want to lose you, too, son. I lost my job, my life, and now I can't lose you as well." "You really feel bad? I mean, really?" "Yes. I don't know how else I can say it. Steve, I'm sorry. I was a fool. I don't know what I was thinking. I was out of my head—but now I feel like I found it again. Please. I know it'll take time, but, accept my apology and let me get to know Sonja." "Huh..." Steve stared at his girlfriend in shock. "Okay. As long as Sonja says it's okay." "Good. Let me go now. I'm very tired. Here's your mother." Steve waited, then heard his mother's voice. "Mom?" "He's really sorry, Steven. I think your father means every word he says." "I'm stunned, really." "He's had quite a shock, too. I don't know what he's going to do now that he's not in the department any longer." "Fish?" "Yes, most likely." "Let me go, Mom." 243
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"Okay, dear. Will you let us know when you can come out for a meal? Soon?" "Okay. We'll let you know." "Goodbye." "Bye." He hung up and then stared at Sonja for a moment. "I think hell froze over." "It was a shock to him. Maybe it's what he needed." "I swear I never thought I'd see the day when he would come around." "I'm very glad." "What will you do? Will you tell your parents about what happened?" "I don't know what to do." She collapsed on his chest and sighed. He held onto her and rested his head back on the cushions. "I'm very glad that's over." "Me, too, Steve. Hopefully that was the worst of it." **** Steve cooked dinner, some chicken cutlets, salad, and a steamed vegetable. They kept the news channel playing on the television, dreading being the topic of the nightly headlines. As he loaded the dishwasher, Sonja curled up on the sofa and flipped the channels to see if anything was on another station. Bringing the rest of the wine with him, Steve topped off her glass and sat down. "Anything?" "No. Nothing." 244
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"Sometimes when it has to do with internal affairs, the police do end up keeping very tight lipped about it." "Maybe we got out of there just in time." "I don't think too much came over radio. I didn't think it was broadcast as anything more than a back up for the sergeant." "What about all those gawking spectators." Steve shrugged. "Even if they know some of the details they don't know our names." "True. I just don't want my parents to hear about it through the grapevine." Rubbing his face tiredly, Steve said, "God, I don't want them to know..." "Okay, stop worrying. We'll figure something out." Sonja shut off the television and set the remote control on the coffee table. "Court tomorrow." "Thank god I don't have court tomorrow. I do next Monday though. That gang shooting." "Yes. That's right." Sonja bit her lip. "I had to testify only once before. Most of the cases are either dismissed or pled out." "I know. So ... uh, you're not very experienced on the stand then?" "Not experienced, but I'm not intimidated either. Why? You planning on grilling me?" He grinned. "Me? No!" She grinned back. "What will you do?" He was intrigued. "Nothing!" She sipped her wine. 245
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"I mean it, Sonja. What should I expect? I mean, it's pretty straight forward. Just what I did, right?" "Yes! Don't worry! You worry too much! Is there anything you don't worry about?" He thought about it, then laughed. "No, I guess not!" "Now stop talking and give me a kiss." He set his glass down hugging her. After he kissed her he said, "There's one thing I don't worry about." "What's that?" "Satisfying you in bed." "Oh, you got that right, sugar!" she purred. "Thank you." "For what?" she asked. "For loving me even though that love has really been a burden on you." "A burden? You don't know what you're talking about." "Yes. I do. You've put up with more than any woman should have, Sonja." "Is that what I'm doing? Putting up with you?" "In a way, yes." "Well, I don't mind it. You're worth it." He smiled adoringly at her, dragging her down on the couch with him, smothering her with kisses.
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Chapter Sixteen "Sonja, you got a minute?" Looking up from her files, she nodded and waited as Carl sat down in front of her desk. "I just had a very disturbing conversation with Frank Williams." Sonja threw down her pen and rolled her eyes. "Sonja, I'm not telling you how to run your life—" "Good!" "...but—when this gets out it won't be good, Sonja." "What difference does it make, Carl? I don't know why everyone thinks it's their business!" "I'll tell you why, Sonja. We have a reputation for fighting against some of the actions of the police. Most of our clients have been arrested by them. Do you see the problem, Sonja?" "Why do our clients need to know my personal life?" "They find out. They just do." "I'm a professional, Carl! I know the difference between business and pleasure!" "Do you?" "What's that suppose to mean?" "I'm talking about Steve Miller. Officer Miller." "What about him?" "Next Monday he will be testifying in that shooting case. And it's up to you to get up there and discredit him! What will you choose, Sonja? Hmmm? Business or pleasure?" 247
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"You just don't worry." "I am worried! This will be like your test case, Sonja!" "Test? Don't you test me, Carl! I don't like being tested!" "It isn't going to be my test case, Sonja. It'll be everyone who is watching this trial's test! They are going to see what you are made of! They are going to see if sleeping with a cop changes your tactics and strategy in that courtroom. You've been very effective up to now, Sonja, and that's why all the defendants come to you—you and me—Are you capable of doing your job?" "I can't believe you are asking me that? You know me better than most, Carl! Don't let some idiot like Frank Williams change the way you think about me. That man is jealous, and his comments are pure venom. You should ignore that man." "I hope you're right, Sonja. You know without those two key points, discrediting both the witnesses and the cops, we haven't a chance." "Would it be so bad if those nasty boys were put away?" "Sonja!" "All right, forget I said that. You know me. I'm there to win." "I know you are. I have no doubt you'll do your job." "I will. Now let me get back to this." He leaned over her desk. "What is it you're reading?" "Officer Miller's academy record." "Anything you can use?" "No. The man was exceptional." "Lucky you." 248
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She caught the glimmer in his eye and chased him out. He waved, shouting, "I'll be in court. Call me if you need anything." "Good-bye, Carl." After he left she sighed and read the instructor's comments on her lover. 'Brilliant future', 'outstanding performance', 'asset to the department', 'natural leader'. She didn't like what she was going to have to do. **** "Is the pizzeria okay, Laura?" Steve asked. "Yeah, anywhere quick. I only have an hour for lunch." She shut the truck's radio and stared out at the passing traffic. "Have you spoken to him since the incident?" "Mom called me to tell me about it. I haven't stopped by yet. I guess I was waiting until the dust settles. I didn't talk to Dad at all." "He went completely mental, Laura. I didn't even recognize him." "Look, there's a parking spot." "Where?" "Where that hatchback is pulling out." "Oh. Cool." After he pulled in and shut the truck, Laura jumped down, waiting for him to set the alarm. She followed him into the pizzeria and lagged behind him as the hostess seated them. They ordered quickly and were served soft drinks. When the waitress left, Laura sipped her Sprite, then said, "I knew he'd go mental, Steve." 249
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"Yes, me too, but I thought that meant he'd rant and rave! Not point a loaded gun in my direction while he was on duty. Come on, Laura, that was pathetic even for him." "It was really pathetic. But, I still am not surprised. You know what he's like." "Yeah, but the weird thing was, after the whole mess he called me and apologized. To me and to Sonja." "Did he?" "Yes. I think the old fucker really felt bad." "Yeah, bad about losing his job!" Laura laughed. "That too, but truly remorseful." "Yeah, right." "I wouldn't have believed it either, Laura. But he said all the right things." "Huh." "He wants to make it up to us and take us out." "Get real! No way. He most likely wants to take you out to scream and shout at." "No. I don't think so." "Well, make sure you invite me along. Seeing Dad eating crow will be very amusing." "I will. But, to be honest, I don't really have any interest in allowing either him or Mom to meet Sonja. I just feel sick about what they did and it isn't going to be just some apology that's going to make it all better. I'm not rushing over there with her and putting Sonja through anything else. They'll have to wait until I check it out. But if we do get together with them, I'll make sure you're there. I'll need you as a body shield." He smirked. 250
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"Ha ha." She shook her head at him. "Enough about them ... I need to date again, Stevie. I feel like I'm out of practice." "Well, divorce messes you up. Give yourself time." "I have done. I feel ready again." "So? Meet someone." "It's not easy." "I know. But it's not impossible either." A tray of pepperoni pizza was set down in front of them. They thanked the waitress, then dug in. "When are you seeing Sonja again?" "I don't know. It's really hard when I'm on shift. I'll most likely stay by her house tonight, then when she goes to work I'll come home and run, then nap before my shift." "Any news on the transfer yet?" "No. I asked Sgt. Lee to check on it the last time I was on shift. I have no idea if he has or not." "How long does it usually take?" "I have no clue." "Is there anyone at work you can set me up with, Steve?" "Let me think..." "Does Sonja have a brother?" She grinned impishly. "Yes, she does. Harry. But he's not exactly your type." "No?" "Let's just say he had a cow over her seeing me." "You never know! The right woman may change him! If Dad could change anything is possible!" "Good point! I'll set you up!" "Really?" He smiled wryly at her and went back to his pizza. 251
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"Oh, well, back to the drawing board." **** It was four PM when he parked in front of their house. Steve shut his engine and looked at the five bedroom split level where he'd spent almost all his young adult life. They only moved once, when he was five, and since then he'd been in that same house until he moved into his condo a year ago. Inhaling for courage, he made his way to the front and checked the screen door. It was locked. "Mom?" When his father appeared, Steve cringed involuntarily and imagined a confrontation. "Come in, Steven. You want a beer?" "Sure, Dad." He closed and locked the door behind him. "Hi, Mom." He found her making dinner in the kitchen. "Hello, dear." She accepted his kiss on the cheek. "Thanks, Dad." Steve took the beer, twisting off the top, then sat down at the kitchen table. Dick sat down across from him. "You all right?" Steve asked. "Yeah. I'm all right." "What did they decide to do? Did you find out?" "They just asked me to request an early retirement." "Really? You must be relieved." "I am." Dick sipped his beer from a tall pint glass. "Are you staying for dinner, Steven?" "No. I was going to go to Sonja's. I don't get to see her very much when I'm on shift. So, since I'm off today I'll be staying over at her place." "Does she have her own apartment?" 252
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Steve thought his dad appeared exhausted. "She's got a house in Van Nuys. She shares it with another lawyer friend, Chelsea." "Van Nuys? She must be doing well." "She is. She's loaded. She comes from a good family as well. Her dad was—still is, an attorney and her mom designs costumes for the theater." "Really?" Susan said, her eyebrows rising in surprise. "Yeah. Her mom is really talented." Steve watched his father's face to see if he showed any sign of stress while discussing them. "What's she doing with you?" Steve smiled at his father's expression. He was happy to see something other than grief in it. "I have no idea. She's totally slumming it with me! Believe me!" "I would like to meet her one day, Steven. I know she may be a bit hesitant now," Susan sighed. "I'm sorry about that, Steve." Dick's face fell again. "I really screwed things up." "Yes, you did." Steve held back his anger, and then sighed, "But, she's such a kind understanding person, she'll most likely agree to meet you guys." "I don't know how she can after what I did." "Dad..." Steve touched his arm. "You've learned something from it, right?" "I did, son. I swear to you. I feel like such a heel. I have no idea why I did that. It's just that seeing you there, you know, it was a shock. I just didn't know how to react. I felt betrayed, son. I've been asking you what was going on, you 253
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know, with the tagging of your locker, and your mother's bad mood, and I just snapped. I can't use a better word to describe it. I snapped." "You really have to ask me why I didn't tell you I was dating a woman of color? Are you kidding me?" "Well, I just think if there was at least a hint of it, I would have been prepared. I'm sorry, I sound like I'm making excuses or blaming you. I'm not blaming you." "Dad, I have to tell you that even after what you did, to see you so remorseful is really making a difference to me. I know no one is perfect, and you've been brought up to be a racist by your own father, but, now—now I feel like I can communicate with you. It really makes a difference." "Have you met her family, Steven?" Susan washed her hands, wiping them on the dish towel. "Yes. We went out to dinner last Saturday night." "And?" "They were a little standoffish at first. But, they came around once we got acquainted." "Are they nice people?" "Very nice. Her dad is very clever. Sharp as a damn whip. You can just tell he absorbs everything you say. And her mom is really young and stylish looking. Dad ... Laura met Sonja at my condo. She really thought she was nice." "She never mentioned it." Dick finished his beer and pushed the empty glass aside. "No. She mentioned it to Mom, I think." He looked over at his mother who was busy cutting up salad. "So ... uh, you 254
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going to do some fishing, Dad? You know, now that you have the time?" "Maybe." "Why don't you call Uncle Stu? You guys haven't been fishing together in ages." "Uncle Stu's been busy, Steven," Susan replied. "How do you know? Everyone needs a break. Call him, Dad." "Soon. Not just yet, son." He stood up slowly, appearing older than his fifty-five years, and said, "I need to lie down. Nice of you to come over and see us, Steven." "All right, Dad ... I'll let you know when we can all get together. Most likely over my days off." "Okay, son." Steve watched him leave the room and looked at his mother for some reassurance. "He looks like shit." "He's been sleeping quite a lot. I think this whole thing has been a real shock to his system." "Are they giving him his pension?" "Yes. They are. Luckily, or I'd have to go back to work." "Shit ... Mom ... why did he do it? He only had five more years there. He really wanted to hit sixty first." "I don't know, Steven. What can I say?" Knowing he should bite his lip, instead he said, "You can say some of it was because you didn't tell him when I asked you to." She met his eye and glared at him. "You should have told him yourself. Don't keep blaming me. You're not ten, you don't need your mother to talk to your father for you." 255
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"No? You know what he's like. You could have just mentioned it." "Enough, Steven. I can't stand going over and over it." Suddenly Steve felt foolish. He touched her arm and said, "Sorry, Mom. I should have had the balls to tell him. It isn't your fault." "You should have. But, that's all in the past now, so forget it." "I'll try, but, I still am uncomfortable about the idea of Sonja meeting either one of you. I don't care if you say you're both changed. I don't believe it for a second." "Then don't bring her around." She shrugged. He set his beer bottle in the sink. "See ya." "Steven..." He paused and looked back at her. Both of his parents seemed to have aged ten years in the last two days. "We do want to meet her properly. Please convince her we want nothing more than the two of you to be happy together." "Honest?" He studied her eyes carefully. "Honest. She sounds like she's come from a very nice family. I have no reason to dislike her." "No. You don't. But she had several reasons to dislike the two of you." "Well, I can't do anything about that if you don't bring her around. I can only apologize when I see her." "Okay, Mom. I'll let you know." She moved to him and kissed his cheek. "We only want what's best for you." 256
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"Then you should pray Sonja stays with me." Steve hugged his mother and left. **** Steve checked the clock on the dashboard and stopped at a florist for some red roses. The aroma filling the compartment of the truck, Steve parked out front and didn't see her car. He rang the bell and Chelsea answered. "Wow! Roses!" "Did she call and say she was going to be late?" He looked around the interior and spotted a man standing in the living room. "No. Come in! She should be home soon. Michael, this is the LAPD cop I was telling you about! Steve Miller." "Hey." "Hey." Steve examined the baggy pants and t-shirt curiously. He had a bandana on his head and a shaggy black goatee. "I'll take those and put them in water. Go talk to Michael." She took the flowers, nudging him into the room. Waiting until Chelsea had left, Steve asked the young man, "Haven't I arrested you?" "Me? No, man!" "I'm kidding. Don't break out into a sweat. Sit down." As if he were obeying orders, Michael dropped down on a leather chair. "Is that your gun?" Looking down at his waist pack, Steve said, "Yeah." "What is it?" "Glock." 257
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"Cool, dude." "What do you do for a living, Mike?" "When I'm not surfing I work over at the record store on Santa Monica Boulevard." "Cool, dude," Steve said, his wit was lost on Michael. "Either of you guys want a drink of something?" Chelsea asked when she came back in. "Oh, Sonja bought beer! She knows you like it." "Did she?" Steve smiled. "I'll have a beer, Chel..." "Okay, how about you, Steve?" "I think I'll wait for Sonja." "Okay. One beer coming up!" When she bounced out of the room again, Steve said, "You know Chelsea's an attorney?" "Yeah. I don't care what she does, man. It's okay by me." About to give him a fatherly lecture about not hurting her, Steve heard the door and stood moving towards it. "Hello, babe!" "Hiya, Steve." "Let me help you with that." He reached for her briefcase. "It's okay. I'll just set it down by the stairs. I don't want you snooping again!" "Snooping? Moi?" "Yes, you!" She kissed him and then spotted Chelsea coming down the hall with a beer. "Oh, good! You got him one." "It's for Michael." 258
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"For Michael? Who the hell's Michael?" Sonja moved to the living room, looking inside "Hey." Michael waved and took the offered beer. "Oh. Hello." Sonja backed out again and gave Steve a pained look. "Come upstairs while I change ... talk to you later!" Sonja waved and smiled. Steve kept his laughter behind his teeth until she had shut the door to her bedroom. "Where the hell did she find him?" She burst out laughing. "I think you guys are having a contest to see which one dates the worst man." "Oh, stop it!" She took off her shoes. "Don't even compare yourself to that thing!" "He's a surfer-dude!" Steve pretended he was on a surfboard. "She wants us to double-date? Pa-leeze!" "Hey, hey, don't be a snob!" Steve scolded. "You know, you're right. Maybe he's a nice guy." "Exactly!" Steve sat on her bed with a bounce. "Let me get out of these work clothes." When she vanished into her closet, Steve scooted higher on the bed to be able to see into it. "Oh, yes..." "You being a pervert and spying on me?" "Take it off, take it all off!" "You are one naughty boy!" "And? Your point? No! Don't put anything on. Come here ... just like that." She emerged in her bra and thong, her hands on her hips defiantly. 259
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"Closer..." he whispered. Smiling, she stepped nearer. "Closer..." She took another step. He wrapped around her waist, nuzzling her cleavage. "Mmmm ... so lovely." "You have a one track mind, Officer Miller." "I can't help it. You're too amazing." "I wish I wasn't so tired." He paused and looked up at her. "I'll stop." "I can please you..." she offered. He pouted out his lower lip comically. "But I want to please you!" "I have a suggestion then." "I'm listening." "Let me unwind with a glass of wine..." "Yes." He tugged her bra down, kissing her right breast, moaning in pleasure. "Have something to eat..." "Yes." He kissed her left one, loving the taste of her skin, sweet as sugar. "Do a little work..." "Argggh ... yes." "And then climb into bed with you." "Deal, Ms. Lawyer." "Good. Now, let me get on some comfortable clothing." He reluctantly released her and stretched back on the bed again as she took off her bra and put on a cotton top. Squirming on the bed as he watched, he reached into his 260
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jeans and moved his cock so it wasn't bent to the side. When she turned to look at him she caught him taking his hand out of his pants quickly and smiled. Once her stretch leggings were pulled on, she shut the closet light and sauntered out as he drooled. "Lay back on the bed..." He instantly flattened out. She opened the clip for his waist pack and set it on the floor, then knelt next to him and opened the button of his jeans. "I can wait..." he lied. "Sure you can." She humored him. When his zipper lowered he lifted his hips and allowed her to pull his jeans down his thighs. He moved his shirt higher on his chest and propped up his head to watch. Moving her hand over his cock as if she loved the feel of it when it was rock hard, Sonja pet it lightly, making it bob in expectation. When she wrapped her painted lips around it he thought he would faint. He had yearned for her to do that to him, but never even considered asking unless she initiated it. The erotic chills that raced over his body made him groan in pleasure. Using her hand and her lips, she brought him up quickly and felt it pulse with the climax. Backing away as he came in hot spurts onto his chest, she ran her hand up and down his smooth skin to prolong the sensation. Panting and rocking his hips side to side, Steve was near crying it was so intense. When he opened his eyes she was 261
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dabbing up the spill with a wet washcloth. "Oh, Sonja ... ooooohhhhh..." "Will that hold you?" "Yes ... oh, you are so amazing..." She kissed the tip and then tucked his hard cock into his jeans. Before she stood up to set the cloth into the bathroom, he caught her wrist and brought her down to his chest. "I love you so much..." Smiling sweetly at him, she whispered, "I feel the same, babe." They kissed and he allowed her to move off the bed, then stood up and tucked his shirt in and ran his hand back through his hair in her dresser mirror. "Let's get some food and wine." She smiled and reached for his hand. He grabbed his waist-pack holster from the floor and set it on her dresser, then rushed to her, almost as if he were wagging his tail like a puppy at her side. When they came down the stairs they passed the living room and found the other two deep in a passionate swoon. Chelsea was kissing Michael while his hand was up her shirt groping. "Oh, dear..." Sonja urged Steve past the room entrance quickly. He peeked in and blinked in surprise. "Zoiks!" A strong grip dragged him to the kitchen as he lingered for a good look. 262
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"I don't mind if they assault each other, but they should do it in the privacy of Chelsea's room!" Sonja snorted. "Where'd those roses come from?" "Me." "Oh! Thank you! That's sweet!" She kissed him. "You're welcome." "You want one of these beers?" "Okay." He took it and almost cut his hand when they wouldn't twist off. He checked the cap, opening a drawer for the can opener. "She got me gourmet micro-brews! You're spoiling me, lady." "I do what I can." She poured a glass of wine for herself, then took out some trays of sushi and soy sauce. "What's that?" "Sushi." "Oh?" "Don't tell me you've never tried it." "I won't tell you." He sat down to watch as she opened the trays up and set down plates. "Try it before you make any judgments." "Okay." An audible moan was heard coming from the living room. "I'm ganna be sick!" Sonja curled her nose. "Turn on some music. Drown them out!" Steve looked for a radio and turned it on. It was already tuned to a station. He increased the volume and some melodic blues music floated around the room pleasantly.
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"Okay. Here." Sonja sat next to him. "This is a California roll. You dip it in soy sauce, then some wasabi, and then you put a little bit of pickled ginger on it." Steve watched in fascination as she did it all, holding it with a pair of chopsticks. "Open wide." Steve opened his mouth. Placing the sushi on his tongue, she waited. He chewed and his eyes lit up. "Mmm!" "I knew you'd like it." "Yum! I never knew it was like that." "Try this one." She picked up a sashimi with shrimp and rice and fed him. "Oh, I love it! Wow..." He grinned as he chewed, his eyes wide. "Excellent!" She smiled proudly and set some on his plate. He picked up the sticks and tried to hold them awkwardly. "Like this." She showed him. Feeling like a clumsy clod, Steve struggled with the chopsticks. Sonja held his hand in hers and worked them for him. "See?" "Oh! Right!" He picked one of the rolls up using the sticks and managed to get a piece in his mouth. "I did it!" He laughed with his mouth full. "You are so talented!" "Liar!" He laughed at her. Smiling happily, she ate some of the wonderful food and groaned. **** 264
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After they had eaten their meal, Sonja peeked into the living room with Steve standing right behind her. "All right! Enough!" Chelsea sat up and pulled her blouse down, but not before Steve caught a good look at her chest. "Wha-at!" she whined. "At least go up to your bedroom! I have some reading to do, and Steve would like to watch some sports on the television!" Michael took off his bandana which was falling off his head and cleared his throat as he seemed to crawl out of the room. When Chelsea attempted to move past Steve, she grinned and whispered, "Get a good look at my double D's?" He choked and didn't reply, looking over her head to Sonja's snarl. "Stop flirting with my lover!" Sonja smacked her bottom. "Go!" Chelsea winked at Steve seductively and wiggled her bottom as she walked down the hall, finally vanishing up the stairs. After they had gone, Sonja studied Steve's expression and bright red cheeks. "You didn't look at her, did you?" "Me?" She rolled her eyes in annoyance. "There's the TV, beer's in the fridge, and I'll be in the dining room." "Okay." She retrieved her briefcase from the bottom of the stairs and walked passed him to the dining room. He dropped down on the sofa and turned on the television trying to get the image of Chelsea's breasts out of his head. 265
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Chapter Seventeen "Carl!" Carl Jacobs stopped and turned around. A man was trying to get his attention in the busy hallway of the courthouse building. "Hello, Frank ... shouldn't you be in court?" "There was a continuance until this afternoon. Look at this, Carl." Frank opened up a newspaper that he had tucked under his arm. He folded it back to make it manageable to read and handed it to him. "Right there ... that article." "Which one? LAPD Sarge goes mental? That one?" "Yes ... read it. Go on." Frank looked around the crowded hall and then back at Carl. "What about it?" Carl handed him his paper back. "What do you want to bet that's Miller!" "Miller? He's only twenty-five, Frank, he doesn't have any kids." "No! His father is a police sergeant! Steve must be the son he was pointing the gun at! I asked around and this Sgt. Dick Miller has one nasty reputation as a real bigot, Carl. Now, say he saw his son out with our Sonja! Well? You see? It makes perfect sense!" Carl snatched the paper back and reread the article again. "Can we find out if it's him?" "You know they close ranks when any of this type of shit hits the fan. I want you to confront Sonja with it." "She'll never tell me." 266
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"Yeah, but you can tell when she's lying. I'll tell ya how. She gets real quiet, then all uppity and indignant. You'll see. If it ain't her, she'll not take any interest at all." "Can I keep this?" He held up the paper. "Yeah. You keep it, with my compliments." Frank grinned. "Right. See ya, Frank. Thanks for the info." **** "...Your Honor—the defense is ready," Sonja shouted over the background noise. "What about the prosecution?" the judge asked. The prosecutor called out in vain for the police officer and witnesses. "No, Your Honor," he muttered angrily. "Case dismissed." The judge slammed her gavel down. Sonja closed her file. "What does that mean?" The man next to her nudged her arm. "You can go. The other side never showed up." "I can go?" "Bye-bye!" He sprinted out of the courtroom before she could say another word. "Sonja!" She peered over her shoulder at someone hissing her name quietly. Seeing Carl there in the mob she nodded to him, making sure none of her other cases were on the docket. Loading her briefcase up and zipping it shut, she met him in the aisle and gestured for him to follow her out of the chaos 267
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of the courtroom. Once they were in the hall she signaled for him to move towards a vacant bench. "Sit down," he said, and sat next to her. "Look at this." She set her briefcase down and took the paper. While she scanned through it, she bit her lip and her hands tightened their grip. "Yeah, so?" She handed it back to him. "That's you. That's about you and your cop friend, isn't it?" She looked around the room and didn't answer. "Sonja! Tell me! Did something happen between you and this sergeant." Exploding in anger, she shouted, "Why do you think something happened? How on earth could that be me? Don't you go making insinuations about my life, Carl!" Smiling, he said wryly, "First silent, then uppity." "What? Uppity? What are you talking about?" "Don't you see? Sonja, it's perfect for court next Monday! Go after this man's father! He's a known racist, Sonja! Then accuse him of the same thing!" "I can't do that! Carl, I cannot do that! The judge will never allow me to direct those types of questions to him! And I won't!" Pausing for effect, he then whispered, "Then it was you..." She turned her face away in annoyance. "It's either you or me, Sonja. You decide. You know I'll murder him up there. I'd love my chance to tear him to shreds ... so if you don't—" "No. I'll do it. I don't want you doing that to him." He stood up, leaving her with the paper. "I knew I could count on you." 268
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After he left she looked at the little article and could not believe he found it, or that he knew it was her. There was nothing in it that even hinted it could be. In frustration she shoved it into a trash bin and stormed down the hall. **** "You know what Frank told me, Mama!" Harry, Jr. shouted at her while she set the table. "He said Sonja's white copboyfriend's father pointed a gun at her!" "What? Harry, stop spreading gossip! You can't believe anything that man tells you! He's green with envy." "No! I'm not joking, Mama! He said it was in the papers! Did you get the papers today, Mama?" "I don't know. If they're here your father's probably put them in the study." Harry raced out of the room as Leticia tried to ignore him and continue getting dinner ready. "Here! He said on page ten, here!" "Page ten? Well, that kind of thing should have been headline news, Harry." She laughed at him. "Read it!" "Get that thing out of my face!" She shoved it aside. "All right! I'll read it!" He cleared his throat and read, "...'Last Sunday at 2 pm in the parking lot of the Ventura Square Market a police sergeant from the Rampart division threatened his white son and his African American girlfriend at gunpoint. Witnesses say several other police units arrived and tackled the middle-aged sergeant, taking away his gun. It 269
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appeared he was arrested and transported away from the scene. There were no injuries.' ..there! Well?" Leticia straightened the silverware on the table. "Mama!" "That article says nothing to me! That could have been anyone! Do you know how many cops LAPD has? I think that's Frank making up stories for all our sakes! Now put that newspaper away and stop spreading gossip!" "You just don't want to believe it! You don't want to know that Sonja's involved with a fricken white racist pig!" "He's not a racist pig, Harry! Why would he be interested in your sister if he were a racist pig! Now are you staying for dinner or not?" "No. I'm not. Althea and I are going out." "Fine! Now leave me in peace!" Harry threw down the newspaper and left. When the front door slammed, Leticia paused, then picked up the paper and reread the article. "No ... oh, dear Lord tell me it's not my Sonja." **** In traffic on her way to her office, Sonja's mobile phone rang. She plugged the earphones into her ears and used the hands-free button. "Yes?" "Sonja? It's your mother." "Hiya, Mama ... I'm driving to the office right now. Is it important?" "Did something happen last Sunday after church?" A cold chill passed over her skin. "Like what?" 270
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"Like what!" her mother shouted. "Uh ... how did you hear about it, Mama?" "I don't believe this! Sonja Mae, I am so angry at you for not telling me and your father!" Stopping for a traffic signal, Sonja adjusted the ear piece. "I was going to tell you! I just didn't get the chance!" "Didn't get the chance? A white sergeant pulls a gun on you and you didn't get the chance to call and tell us! Oh, I could slap you, girl!" "He didn't pull a gun on me! Just Steve ... Look, can I call you back when I get to the office?" "NO! Pull over! I need to get this hashed out right now! I am so angry I can scream." "You are screaming, Mama." She put her blinker on and pulled into a side street and put it into park. "Do you blame me? I had to hear it from your crazy brother." "How did he find out?" "He heard it from Frank who read it in the damn newspaper!" "Frank! Oh, I could kill him." "Forget about Frank. What the hell is going on, Sonja!? When we talked about it with you and Steve, I knew that his father would be a problem, but I never expected anything like this." "Look, calm down. The police took Mr. Miller's gun and badge away from him." "Well, I should think so!" 271
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"He feels real bad, Mama. He even called and apologized. He asked to speak to me when I was at Steve's condo and he begged my forgiveness." "Begged! That ain't even close to being enough! What about Steven!? What on earth did he do about it?" "He pushed me away the instant his father approached him. He made sure I was out of harm's way, Mama ... just like you would expect he would. Then he tried to talk some sense into that crazy man." "He pushed you away?" "He did. He shoved me behind him and then distracted his dad so I could get away. I was perfectly safe in a store with plenty of people watching over me. I'm the one who called 911! It was poor Steve who was dealing with it! He's the one who had the gun pointed at him, not me, Mama ... no, Steve made sure I was well out of the way." "Well, thank the Lord for that..." She exhaled a deep breath. "He tried to get him to calm down, but in the end the police got him down on the ground and took his gun. They made him leave the police, Mama. He sounded really crushed when I was on the phone with him. I felt bad for the guy." "You felt bad for him!? Sonja, you've been defending felons for wayyy tooo long..." "I don't know, Mama ... he said he was really sorry. He wants to take us out for dinner and make it up to us." "You steer clear of that man, do you hear me?" Sonja laughed. "I'm not worried about it anymore, Mama..." 272
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"I don't want you near that man ... promise me!" "I can't do that! That's Steve's daddy! But, it won't be soon ... don't worry." "I have to tell your father ... he'll find out, like I did, from Harry or Frank." "Tell him. But, tell him the way it really happened, Mama. I had no gun pointed at me! You make sure he knows that!" "I cannot believe this happened to my baby girl ... I am sick about it." "You should be sick for Steve, Mama ... he's the one who has to deal with that horrible man. Imagine that for your father?" "Sounds like white trash to me." "I know. But, please don't judge Steve because of it. You met him, you know he's not like that." "I'm trying to keep an open mind, Sonja, but when this kind of thing happens..." "No, please don't take it out on him. Mama, he's so devastated it happened. And I told you, he was like a hero defending me. He never would have let anything happen to me. Say you'll not take this out on poor Steve. It'll crush me, Mama ... please." "All I can do is try. I can't promise more than that." "Good. That's all I ask. I have to go, Mama ... I have to get to my office." "Okay, Sonja, but please, be careful. Don't go near that man." Sonja said, "Okay, Mama ... I love you." "You too, be careful." 273
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She disconnected the phone and looked into her rear view mirror, then headed back to the main street again shaking her head at how Frank had figured it out. Now she had to deal with the fall out. **** Lydia dropped down in the seat next to Steve in the roll call room. She leaned on Steve's side as he read a new bulletin on a crime spree in his district. "Oh, look, your cut's almost healed ... good. I was worried it would get infected, but it's really almost gone, isn't it ... Oh, yeah! Did you hear some sergeant in the Rampart division got in trouble for pointing his gun at his own son?!" Trying not to cringe, Steve shook his head. "No. Didn't hear a thing." "No one is saying who, but some of the day shift cops were at the scene. I heard the captain swore them to secrecy." "Huh ... look at this ... more burglaries in my district. I wish I could catch that guy." "Let me see. Yeah, it's got to be the same one. Kitchen windows. He does it the same way every time. But, all the homes there are armed! What an idiot." "Probably a smash and grab type thing." "Yeah. You should hang out in that neighborhood when you can. I'd stop everyone walking around there at night." "If I can I will." "So ... did you do anything exciting this weekend? You know, on your three days off?" 274
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"No. Nothing exciting at all," Steve mumbled, and folded the bulletin up and put it with his note pad in his pocket. **** On his way out of the roll call room, Sgt. Lee called Steve's name. He stopped and approached him. "I need to talk to you." "Okay." Steve waited as he gathered up his clipboard and roster, then followed him to his desk. "I heard some news of the transfers. They're supposed to come out in about a week. Your name is on it." "You know where I'm going?" "Days. I have no idea which division yet." "Days..." Steve cheered silently and pumped his arm up and down. "They'll probably send you to a real shit area, Miller." "What can I do? I'm the fucking rookie, Sgt. Lee. But, I swear these hours are killing me." "Well, just be careful what you wish for. You're in a very nice area of LA at the moment." Suddenly Steve's euphoria vanished. "What should I do?" "Cross your fingers and wait. I'm not saying you'll go there for sure. It's just typical for a newbie." "Yeah, but at least those are all Adam cars. Not one person units ... right? So, I'll have a partner." "Yes. They are all two-man units." Shrugging, Steve said, "All right. I can handle that." Sgt. Lee looked around the area quickly, then whispered, "How's your Dad? You guys square it up at all?" 275
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Steve peeked over his shoulder as well, then whispered back, "Does everyone know?" "Only a few of us. We were warned to keep it to ourselves under pain of discipline. No one will let it leak, Miller." "I was amazed the press never got hold of it." "I read a tiny article in the paper this morning about it, but they knew nothing—no names. No incriminating details." "Good." Steve ran his hand through his hair tiredly. "He's been pretty good since, Sarge ... he kept apologizing and telling me he just 'snapped'. He and Mom haven't taken the early retirement well, but it was only five years. Hopefully the pension money won't be too much less than he was expecting." "I wish I could say we lost a good man, but your father had quite a reputation." Sickened by the comment as he looked at his supervisor, Steve didn't know what to say. "Look, Sarge, I'm sorry he's such a jerk." "I didn't ask you for your apology, Steve. You've got nothing to be sorry for. You and he are as different as oil and water. You're a great cop, Steve, and I'm sorry to lose you to day shift. I mean that." Reaching out his hand to him, Steve shook it warmly and smiled. "Thanks, Sarge. I hope my new sergeant is half as nice as you are. And I mean that." "Go. Hit the street." Steve returned his smile and headed out, thrilled that the number of days when he had to be on shift in the wee hours of the morning were numbered. 276
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**** Hearing his mobile phone ring, Steve pulled it out of his uniform pocket and smiled when he read the number. "Hello, babe! I was just about to call you to let you know I was in the neighborhood. I drove by there earlier and I didn't see your car." "I stopped by my parents' place, Steve. They found out about what happened on Sunday." "What?" He lowered the volume of the police radio and looked out at the vacant church lot. "How the hell did they find out? No one knows about it but a handful of cops and sergeants." "They read it in the paper!" "Sgt. Lee said that article didn't give away anything! There must be a leak in the police somewhere." "Steve—Frank figured it out." "Frank?" Steve sneered, "When did you see Frank?" "I didn't. He's been busy though, let me tell you!" Seeing a patrol car making its way over to him in the dark, Steve cursed under his breath. "Hang on..." "Hi, Stevie!" "Who the hell is that?" Sonja asked suspiciously. "Hi, Lydia, I'm on a phone call, can I just finish it?" "Sure." She shrugged and then appeared surprised when he closed his window for privacy. "Steve?" "Sorry, a co-worker just pulled up next to my patrol car. You were telling me about Frank?" 277
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"Which co-worker? A female co-worker?" "Yes! Sonja! About Frank!" "You didn't tell me about no female co-worker..." she muttered. "Sonja, please..." "Well, he told Harry, then he told Carl, and then Harry told my mother ... I'm telling you, Steve, everyone around me knows. It's no secret here!" "Shit! No one is supposed to know about it! And the only one's who do seem to be supervisors." He glanced at Lydia and it appeared she was trying to lip read, so he twisted away from her. "He figured it out on his own, Steve. Frank is very crafty. Not a lot gets passed him. My guess is he saw that article and then had Carl badger me until I let it out." "You admitted it!?" "Don't you yell at me!" "Sonja, you could have denied it. It doesn't help that you're confirming everyone's suspicions." "Are you blaming me for this!?" "No ... no ... I'm not. Look, I just had some vain hope that this thing would stay buried. I should know better. So? Now your mother and father hate me, right?" "No. They don't hate you. They were understandably upset, Steve." "Yes, of course. Let me talk to them and explain it." "I think I cleared it up pretty well with my mom earlier today. And she did the same with Dad. I just came from dinner there and they didn't go on about it too long." 278
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"I feel like throwing up." "You get yourself very wound up about things. Calm down!" "Should I stop by?" "Not tonight. I am shattered. Let me crawl into bed." "I wish I was crawling in with you..." "Me too ... believe me. I could use a good warm hug." "Oh, baby. I can come and hug you." "I'll have to dream it tonight, Steve. Really. I am so tired I can't even function." "Okay, I'll let you off the hook. I do have some good news though." "Good! I'm due!" "Sgt. Lee said the transfers are coming out soon. And he said I definitely got days." "Yippee ... that's good news!" "But..." "Why is there always a but?" "But ... it may be in a rough area of town. He said sometimes the new guys get stuck there." "Oh, no ... no way!" "I'm not sure of anything yet, but we'll have to wait and see." "I don't want you in that job! I don't want you in that job!" she repeated again, trying to emphasize it. Laughing at a line he had heard many times before, he said, "I am thinking of an alternative career ... thinking about it..." "Really?" 279
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"Yes. I just don't know what the heck I can do yet ... I have to give it more thought." "Great! Next time we're together, I want to talk more about it." "Okay. You got it." "Let me go to sleep." "Okay. Goodnight, Sonja. I love you." "Night, Steve. Please be careful out there. I love you, too." He hung up and lowered his window. "Sorry." "It's okay. Everything all right?" "Hmm? Yeah. Just talking with my girlfriend." "Is she the 'kind of' girlfriend still?" "No, she's the real kind of girlfriend now." "Oh." "Sorry..." "Is she a cop?" "Oh, God no!" Steve read her offended expression and apologized again. "What's her name?" "Sonja Knight." "That's a pretty name." "She's a pretty lady." "Look at the way you light up when you talk about her! Wooo ... she must be something special. I hope she appreciates you." "She does ... hang on, radio is calling me." They both listened to the transmission. Steve replied over the air that he had heard and set the car in drive. "Gotta go..." 280
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Chapter Eighteen He hated waking up early for court. Most of the other guys just stayed awake or slept in the bunk room. Determined to get home and close his eyes for three hours, Steve heard the alarm and groaned in agony. With a supreme effort he forced himself out of bed and scuffed to the shower hoping the hot water would motivate him. Two strong cups of coffee later, he was in his truck, in uniform, and driving to the courthouse. After getting a parking receipt validated he felt like he was groping his way blindly to the correct room, then knew he was in the right spot when several other squad mates were already there slouched on the wooden benches. He collapsed next to Lydia who cried, "I hate court..." Steve tried to smile at her red rimmed eyes, but failed. "We better testify," Eddie warned, "If they get us here, they better not continue it." "I didn't even do anything," Lydia whined, "I just took a stupid statement!" "Me, too!" Eddie joined her, "I didn't do fuck all!" "Shut up..." Steve rubbed his face. "You're all giving me a headache." When the prosecutor appeared, hurrying down the hall, he did a roll call of names and looked relieved everyone was there, including all the witnesses from the scene. "Look this is how it's going to go..." Everyone sat up in attention. 281
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"The DA is calling all the cops first, then the detectives, then the witnesses will most likely go after lunch recess. They already picked a jury and are ready for opening statements." "Cops first, yes!" Lydia hissed. "So don't disappear!" he warned everyone. "You'll go in one at a time because they don't want you to hear each other's testimony. Got it? Who's the primary?" "I am." He stood next to Steve. "Here's a copy of your report. I expect you'll get the most grilling. You arrested the defendant after the witnesses pointed him out, right?" "Yes..." "Who picked up the gun?" "Eddie did originally, but he gave it to me to put into evidence." Steve looked over at Eddie's tired face. "Did you write that in your chain of custody?" "Yes. It's in both our statements," Steve assured him. "Okay. We'll call you and you," he pointed at Lydia, then Eddie. "And you last." Steve nodded. "Let me go speak to the homicide unit. I'll be back." When he hurried to a group of men in suits, Steve continued to rub his face to wake up. "Christ, I feel too fuzzy headed for this. I wish I had more sleep." "Well, all I did was take a written statement." Lydia sighed nervously. "I heard the attorneys this guy has are ruthless." Steve perked up and nodded to Eddie to go on. 282
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"There's some chick they've got that lulls you into a false sense of security and then goes for the jugular! I don't want anything to do with her." "Some chick?" Steve asked. "What's her name?" "Ahhh ... shit ... I can't remember..." "Knight?" "Knight! That's it!" He pointed at him in amazement. Lydia perked up and tilted her head, as if she was trying to think. "Right, let me get in there." The prosecutor hurried to the door. "I'll have someone call you in one at a time as we need you." When he vanished Steve felt sick to his stomach. "This is going to take all day..." Eddie moaned. "At least we're going first. Pity the poor witnesses!" Lydia looked at the few young people pacing nervously. "My guess is it'll take days ... not just a day." Steve sat up, straightening his back. "I'm not coming back! Fuck the overtime!" Eddie shook his head. "You don't have a choice, you dork," Steve replied, "If they subpoena you, you go!" After about fifteen minutes when the opening statements were done, a head poked out and called Lydia's name. They all sat up and watched her walk to the door as if she was headed to a firing squad. "Go get em, tiger," Steve smiled. She crossed her fingers at him and then went in. Ten minutes later she returned, looking red-faced and worn out. 283
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"Geezuz!" Steve shook his head at her. Someone admonished them, "No talking!" Eddie was called next. He swallowed audibly and went in. Steve whispered to Lydia, "Can't you go home?" "Not until recess. In case they have to recall me." "Shhh!" They both gave the clerk a dirty look and then shut up. Fifteen minutes later Eddie emerged in the same state as Lydia had been, looking pale and sickly. Steve was beginning to panic. When his name was called he felt his skin turn prickly and cold. With the report in his damp hand he walked into the room packed with reporters and spectators, and made his way to the front. "Raise your right hand..." Steve did and repeated the line to swear him in, then he sat down. The prosecutor asked him his name and date of birth, Steve gave them, then he noticed Sonja sitting at a long table with the man he arrested and another African American attorney. "You responded to the report of a shooting. Please tell the court what transpired when you responded to a call on the night of Thursday, September fourteenth, 2006?" Steve looked over at the mixed race jury and began explaining how a dispatched call came out over radio and he was the primary unit on the scene. "When you got there, Officer, did the witnesses notify you who did this shooting?" 284
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"Yes." "Objection! Hearsay!" Steve looked straight at Sonja after she shouted it out, never catching his eye. "Your Honor, this is a police investigation and doesn't fall into the hearsay rule!" "Overruled!" "Continue, Officer Miller." "I ... I arrested that man there." "Advise the court Officer Miller has identified the defendant!" "So noted!" "Officer Miller, when you found the witnesses pointing at the defendant, they indicated he had done the shooting, correct?" "Yes." "And you arrested him." "Yes." "Did he have the gun on him?" "No. They pointed that out as well. Officer Delgado picked it up and gave it to me, then I placed it into evidence." "Then what happened?" "I called a sergeant to the scene and after he arrived I transported the suspect to homicide, then submitted the gun into evidence." "Did you do anything else?" "After that I wrote up the paperwork. That was it." Steve looked at Sonja who was writing notes frantically. 285
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"Thank you, Officer. No more questions at this time, Your Honor." "Ms. Knight?" the judge called. When she stood and met his eyes, he actually shivered from the power. He didn't know this Sonja Knight. The one he knew was very soft and sweet. Who the heck is this woman? he wondered nervously. Taking her time, walking towards him, she said, "Good morning, Officer Miller." "Morning." He wasn't smiling. Nothing about this encounter was going to be amiable. "How long have you been working for the Los Angeles Police force, Officer Miller?" "Ten months." "Is that all? Ten months and you get to be primary on a gang shooting ... how amazing." Since it wasn't a question he just stared at her. "How much training do you get in the academy for homicides, Officer Miller?" "We get most of our training in investigations and that includes all crimes." "Really? No special homicide training?" "Like I said, it's included in the investigations, but, our homicide detectives do most of the work." "Ah, I see..." She walked nearer the jury. "When you arrived on the scene that night it must have been quite chaotic." "Yes." 286
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"People running everywhere? Getting away from the gunfire?" "Yes." "So, are you saying that some people hung around in all that chaos?" "Yes." "And would it make sense that a man who has just shot another man wouldn't try to run?" "He may have tried. But he was being detained by several people." "I see..." She nodded. "And what race were the 'several people' who were holding the defendant?" "What?" He couldn't believe the question. "What race where they, Officer? White, black?" "Uh ... White and I believe one Hispanic." "So, you come to a crowd and there's this one black youth being held by white and Hispanic people." "Yes." "Didn't you think that was a little odd?" "Odd? How was it odd?" "Well, what if this little group of white people decided to imply my client shot someone, when he didn't shoot anyone?" "Why would they do that? What would be their motive?" "Racism, Officer Miller." Steve shivered and tried not to panic. "In my opinion, the witnesses were only detaining the man because they believed he had done the shooting." "Did he have a gun on his person?" 287
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"No. They said he tossed it down and tried to blend in with the crowd." "And you believed them?" "Objection, Your Honor!" the prosecutor shouted, "It's a police officer's job to hear witness statements and make an informed arrest!" "Sustained!" Sonja approached him calmly. "Officer Miller, do you have a father who was an LAPD sergeant?" "What does that have to do—" "Objection! I fail to see the significance of this line of questioning, Your Honor!" the prosecutor shouted. "Ms. Knight, is there a reason for this line of questioning?" "It shows a pattern, Your Honor." "I'll give you a very short leash, counselor ... answer the question, Officer Miller." He glared at her. "Yes." "Yes, you have a father who was an LAPD sergeant, is that right, Officer Miller?" "I said, yes..." he snarled. "And was your father involved in an incident involving race in which he was forced to retire from the department? Particularly against an African American individual?" He looked at the prosecutor for some help and received only a pained look. "Answer the question, Officer Miller," the judge prodded. Surrounding them were cameras, newspaper reporters, spectators... "Why are you doing this to me?" he asked her in agony. 288
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"Was he forced to take an early retirement, Officer Miller?" He ground his jaw. "Yes..." "So, can we believe you may have a somewhat biased opinion on the subject? And instantly when white people accuse a black individual of a crime you believe them?" "I am not biased! It's my job to arrest people who commit a crime! I don't look at what color they are!" "No? Coming from the LAPD with its string of questionable incidences, you don't think you could have been biased in the least?" "Asked and answered, Your Honor!" the prosecutor shouted. "Move on, Ms. Knight." "So, Officer Miller, you see a crowd of white people holding a black youth and you arrest him, even though there was no victim to point him out, no gun on his person—" "His victim was dead!" Steve growled. "I'd like that comment stricken from the record, Your Honor," she warned. "So stricken, the jury will disregard Officer Miller's comment." She paused, for the first time she actually looked into his eyes. He could tell by her expression that she felt his resentment. He knew she had a job to do, but the line of questioning she had chosen was beyond his belief. As he watched her face, it flinched as if some kind of pain were passing through her. He even noticed she clutched her stomach as if catching a spasm of some kind. 289
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"Ms. Knight?" the judge prodded again. It appeared to Steve she was trying to get her head straight. **** She walked to her desk and looked through the papers. "Anything else, Carl?" she whispered. "Nope, it was perfect, doll, perfect," he whispered back. **** She turned to Steve and said, "No more questions for this officer, Your Honor." "Any redirect, Counselor?" the judge asked the prosecutor. Red faced and angry, he stood and asked Steve once again, "You have no doubt that the man seated over there..." He pointed to the defendant whose frown had somehow changed to a wicked smirk during Steve's grilling, and said, "...is the man who the witnesses identified as the gunman." "No. I have no doubt." "Thank you, Officer. No more questions, Your Honor." "You may step down, Officer Miller. The court will take a twenty-minute recess and reconvene at eleven o'clock." When she stood everyone stood up and waited for her to leave the court room. The moment she did, Steve made for the door like a mad bull. ****
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The defendant was cuffed and removed from the courtroom, smiling in triumph. Carl reached out his hand to Sonja. "You were brilliant!" "Not now, Carl..." She raised her head over the crowd. When she raced out of the room, Carl shook his head, smiling ear to ear. "Steve!" He was standing at the elevator door with Lydia and Eddie, who were pumping him to talk. "Steve..." When he turned to see her face she shrunk back at the hatred she found. "Back there, Steve ... it's just the job..." "You humiliated me in there..." he hissed. Lydia and Eddie started in surprise at the hostility. "No, Steve ... it's just the stupid job, I didn't mean—" "How could you do that to me?" "I didn't mean it ... Steve..." When the elevator opened and a crush of people came out, she struggled to catch up to him. Lydia stood in her way. "Why don't you leave him alone? He's not in the courtroom anymore. You can't keep hounding him." "No ... I have to talk to him ... Steve!" He didn't meet her eye. When the door closed Sonja panicked. She raced to the stairwell and started sprinting down the stairs. Pausing, pulling off her high heels, she shoved passed annoyed people and made it to the lobby panting to catch her breath, shoving her shoes back on. **** 291
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The elevator doors opened and he came out with the horde. "Steve!" "Man, she doesn't give up!" Lydia shook her head in amazement. When she grabbed Steve's sleeve Lydia almost knocked her down. Sonja shouted at her in warning, "You touch me and I'll have your badge!" "Leave him alone!" Lydia roared. "Steve! Please!" He nodded to Lydia to wait. She stood back with her mouth open as if she couldn't believe he was giving this pushy defense lawyer the time of day. Breathing a sigh of relief, Sonja held his hand and dragged him to a semi-quiet spot in the lobby. "Baby, I'm sorry ... Carl said if I didn't do it, he would, and he's so much worse than me ... I hated it, I did. You know I love you and would never hurt you like that." "But you did hurt me, Sonja." Her face contorted in pain. "Oh, lover, no ... I didn't mean to. It's this stupid job ... Carl knew about the incident and he threatened me he would use it, and he's so much more of a pit bull than I am. I didn't want him to do it." "So, you decided to do it yourself? That was better?" "Yes! No! I thought it was initially because he can be so horrible. You have no idea. He'd crucify his own grandmother to get an acquittal. I wanted to spare you that. I thought if I did it, I could just do the bare minimum and he'd be happy and you wouldn't be put through it." 292
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He stared at her as an answer, indicating he already was 'put through it'. "No ... it wasn't that bad, was it? Baby?" She caressed his face gently. "You sacrificed me for your slimy defendant." "I didn't!" "You know what the biggest disappointment is, Sonja?" "What, no, baby ... don't tell me." "After all we've been through ... all the shit from my parents, your brother, and all the other assholes around us, you—you hurt me more than any of them. I thought it was supposed to be us against the world, Sonja ... but who will protect me from you?" **** Frank and Carl exited the elevator laughing together over Sonja's cross examination. When Carl spotted her with Steve he stopped Frank in his track. "Uh oh, a little ex-parte discussion is going on over there." **** "Steve, no, I'll never do that again ... I'm so sorry. It's all my fault. Let me make it up to you." "I need to go." He walked away from her. "What's going on here?" Carl asked. "You put me up to it, Carl! I never should have done it! You know what I did to that poor man? I feel sick!" "You're looking at a mistrial, Sonja!" Carl growled. 293
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Steve stopped and turned around at the shouting. When she could, Lydia rushed over to him and wrapped her hand around his arm tightly. "Good! It should be! The tactics we use to get those hoodlums off sickens me!" "Sonja! Lower your voice!" "I will not! You know something, Carl? You can finish this trial without me! I've had enough! I'm sick to death of putting good law-abiding citizens through the ringer just to let some slimebag go out and kill someone else!" "Sonja!" Carl looked around and found several court clerks lingering with interest. "You need to stay on the case! I didn't do all the research! You know how to win it, not me!" "Do I? I'm not interested in winning it ... What the hell you lookin' at, Frank? Turn your ugly face away before I smack you!" "Holy shit, Steve, this defense attorney is cracking up!" Lydia whispered. "You two morons have caused enough trouble in my life, and you know what? Enough! I don't want any part of either of you!" She flicked her hand at them in disgust. "Sonja! We'll have to have a new trial! You can't bow out now!" "I can't? You just watch me! This is me bowing out, Carl! I'll tell the judge I'm madly in love with that handsome LAPD police officer and we've talked about the case, and you know what? She'll kick it right out! I have a good mind to do it right now ... and I'll tell you what! My love for him means more to me than you, or you, or this poxy job! I quit, Carl! Quit! My 294
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roommate does contract law, it may be boring but it's got to be better than this!" "Sonja! What will your father think?" "Shut your mouth, Frank! Don't you talk to me about my father! You don't even mention him to me! After what you did? Assaulting me? He would kick your ass to Mexico if he sees you again!" Frank loosened his collar uncomfortably at the accusation. She opened her briefcase and pulled out the file. "Here! It's all yours, Carl!" She threw it at him and it fell in a flurry of pages. As he scrambled to clean it up, she shouted, "Now, I'm going to try and make up with the man I love! And hopefully, if I'm lucky, he'll give me another chance. But, I'm through with you lot!" Lydia blinked her eyes and looked up at Steve. He was grinning so wide she gasped in surprise. When she looked to where he was aiming his adoring grin, she found a very angry defense attorney who was still ranting under her breath as she steamed towards the door. He positioned himself directly in her path until she almost bumped into him and excused herself around him. "You're amazing." "Steve..." she sighed, "I thought you were long gone." She looked at Lydia and her hold on Steve's arm. Lydia released it instantly and stepped back. Impulsively he reached up to Sonja's face and cupped her jaw, kissing her.
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She wrapped around his broad shoulders and rocked in his arms as the few who had heard the shouting clapped and hooted. **** Frank tapped Carl as he stooped over to pick up all the loose paper. He raised his head and found the two lovers in a swoon. "Forget it, Frank ... it's over." **** Lydia gasped, "Sonja Knight! That's where I heard that name!" Steve winked at her quickly and then resumed his passionate kissing. When Sonja leaned back to see his face she said, "Am I forgiven?" "Oh, yes ... that performance was quite enough. I don't need an encore." "I love you, Officer Miller." "Oh, and I love you, too, Sonja Knight..." He spun her around in his arms and she laughed in joy. "Take me home." "My pleasure." He waved to Lydia and they walked out into the sunshine, grinning in victory.
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