Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 2 Kitsuné Wedding
For Taylor, with love and thanks
HE
HAD his name and he had his sword. Some would say
that was enough for any man. Better to be a rōnin than to serve an unworthy master. Fujiwara Ryuichi’s master had been unworthy in the extreme, so Fujiwara left that service, even knowing that it might mean he would never rise to serve a great house, and he struck out on his own. But there was no work at all for a samurai who had deserted his master, even a bad, corrupt master. No work, no respect, no honor due him. He had chosen the wrong master; the burden of honor was on him whether he chose to stay in service or walk away. He reached Nagoya, masterless and reduced to manual labor in exchange for food and a place to sleep, feeling as if he was coming to the end of himself. Yet he had it in his heart to see Fuji-san once more, so he walked east into the blaze of the rising sun. By the time he had crossed the river and the sacred mountain was looming above, his heart was heavy. Even the sight of the snow-capped peak did little to lift it. His katana, once so much a part of him, had grown heavy too. “Lay me down,” it seemed to say to him. “Lay me down and take your leave.” So on the morning when he set out on the last leg of his journey, the one that would bring him to the foot of the sacred mountain—realm of snow and fire—he knew what he
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 3 must do, what he should have done to begin with. Honor demanded that he surrender his own life. He reached the base of the mountain in the early afternoon. There, amidst the flowering almond trees, he sat down to meditate on his life and to plan his own ending, for if his life had not been lived well, at least his ending should be good. He washed himself and donned his best clothes. Then he composed his death poem, a short one for a short life: The honor of death Wipes clean the dishonor of A brief life wasted. He rolled up the page and set it aside on his carefully arranged armor where no blood could fall upon it. Then he knelt on the soft mat of grass and opened his robes. He took up his wakizashi and spent a moment in contemplation of the fine blade. It was then that a voice pierced the silence. “Is this truly the only end you can imagine for yourself, Fujiwara-san?” Ryuichi looked up in surprise. “Who’s there?” he demanded, seeing no one close enough to speak to him. “How do you know my name?” Had someone followed him from the Matsuda castle? “I know many things, Fujiwara-san. The kami brought you to this mountain for a reason.” Ryuichi grabbed for his katana. “Show yourself!”
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 4 There was a rustling among the vivid blanket of purple irises that grew along the bank of the stream. He had chosen that spot so the sound of the stream and the sight of the irises would be with him as he passed out of his life. He watched as the mass of purple and green parted and a sharp little red-furred face appeared. The fox’s bark sounded like laughter. “Do you know me, now, Fujiwara-san? I am called Kaji-no-Shita.” Ryuichi knew this was not the kitsuné’s true name, for such knowledge would give a human great power over the little creature. But kitsuné were kin to the great dragons and were dangerous spirits in their own right. With a nickname like “Tongue of Fire,” this kitsuné was undoubtedly one of the fire clan and doubly chancy to ignore or insult. “Forgive me, Kaji-san. I did not know what to think.” “Indeed.” The fox trotted up to him and sat down next to his pile of armor. “I appear to have come upon you at an inopportune moment. You have lost your honor?” “I fear so.” “And yet you treat me with respect in spite of having no need of my goodwill. This doesn’t speak of a dishonorable nature, though I could be wrong.” “I deserted my master,” Ryuichi said simply. “And the reason?” “Is my own.” The fox nodded. “Truly. And yet the course on which you propose to embark is a rather permanent one. Would
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 5 there be harm in putting it off for an hour while we discuss your options?” “I should have done this while yet in his service, as a protest. Instead I ran away. I have no options.” “Everyone has options.” “There is no work for a samurai who has deserted his master, no matter what that master was.” “So then do you propose to die for the sake of honor or because you are unemployed?” the fox asked with a tilt of its head. Ryuichi had no answer and so gave none. It disturbed him not to know the answer. “Well… how if I told you that I could find you a master? A good, honorable master whom none would hesitate to follow? Would you still wish to die?” “How could an honorable master wish to employ a dishonored servant?” Ryuichi asked. The kitsuné seemed to frown, though that might have been a trick of the light. Animals had never struck Ryuichi as having such expressive faces. “Of course it would depend on the circumstances. If you had served a master he deemed unworthy of your high standards of honor, then he would almost certainly feel that you had acted correctly in leaving that service. May I know the name of your former master?” Ryuichi hesitated, but then he wondered why it should matter at all. His employment had been public; anyone who
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 6 wanted to know its details had only to ask. “Matsuda-noIchiro,” he replied, “whose castle lies near Osaka.” “Oh, Matsuda-san; yes, I have heard of him.” Ryuichi was curious. “What have you heard?” Again, the slight tilt of the head. “It is the province of my kind to gossip, I suppose. I know Matsuda-san to be a corrupt man and one who has cheated and angered some powerful spirits. He will not retain his power much longer. It is well for you that you are no longer in his service. Now, as for your situation, I say again: how if I find you a new master?” “If I can serve him in good conscience, and if he accepts me in spite of what I have done, then I would be content not to die today. But forgive me, Kaji-san; what would you ask in return?” The little kitsuné seemed offended. “Can I not do these things out of the kindness of my heart?” But upon seeing Ryuichi’s stricken look, he barked with laughter again. “Oh, Fujiwara-san, the look on your face! Yes, I have a request, and it is not a small one. If I do this for you, I would ask you to become my husband.” Ryuichi was stunned. “You are not married, Fujiwara-san?” “No, I’m not.” “Does the idea of becoming husband to one of my kind disturb you?”
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 7 Ryuichi thought about it, thought about the reputation of kitsuné women for being beautiful and the reputation of fox families for being very fortunate. “Not at all,” he said truthfully. “I am honored, in fact. It seems that you will give me two gifts instead of favor for favor.” “Prettily put. Well, as you are dressed in your finest, shall we marry now? Then I will take you to your new master, and you may begin your service.” Ryuichi agreed. While Kaji-san went off to summon the other guests, he tore up the page upon which he’d written his death poem and cast the pieces into the water of the stream, watching as the cold, clear water washed them away along with his despair. How quickly luck changes, he thought as he straightened his clothing and made himself presentable. An hour ago I was preparing to die. Now I am preparing to be married. The wedding guests assembled, and a tall, distinguished kitsuné in the gorgeously embroidered robes of a priest beckoned Ryuichi. “You are prepared to marry?” he asked. “I am.” “And to be a loyal and loving spouse?” “Yes.” He looked down at the little fox who had appeared at Ryuichi’s side. “And you are prepared to do the same?” “I am,” said Kaji-san. “Then let us begin.”
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 8 It was an odd ceremony with odder guests, and yet Ryuichi felt surprisingly at home among them. It was said that his family had fox blood, and he thought perhaps that was why Kaji-san had chosen him as a mate. Like calls to like after all, he thought, as the guests brought their gifts and laid them in a circle around the couple. The physical gifts were twigs, stones, and bits of paper, but Kaji whispered to him that each contained a wish or a blessing for the marriage. The guests were mostly other kitsuné: some, like Kaji, in fox form; some in the fox-human form that the priest had taken. There were other kami—nature spirits—there as well, and other animals who might also have been spirits or might have simply been curious. The priest invoked Inari Okami’s blessings on the couple, and the kami of the flowers and grasses, stones, trees, and stream all saluted them. When rain fell lightly out of the cloudless blue sky, they were pronounced “married.” After the ceremony, while everyone was enjoying the wedding feast that had appeared suddenly under one of the almond trees, Kaji-san took Ryuichi to meet his new master who lived in a castle high on the slope of Fuji. They were admitted into the presence of a venerable old gentleman. Kaji bowed and said, “Jurōjin-sama, I have the honor to present to you my esteemed husband, Fujiwara Ryuichi. He is a samurai without a master. Will you accept his service?” The old man looked Ryuichi over and nodded. “I have need of good men,” he said. “Yet I would happily employ him, Kaji-sama, for love of you alone. And I congratulate you both on your marriage. May it be long and happy and blessed with abundant wealth.”
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 9 “With your blessing, Jurōjin-sama, it will be all those things,” the little fox replied. “Then it is given gladly, my little friend. Fujiwara-san, report to me in two days’ time. Until then, revel at your wedding feast and in the arms of your beloved.” Ryuichi was overwhelmed with happiness. In a matter of hours he had gone from the deepest well of despair to the joy of a married man, serving a fine master. By the time they reached the base of the mountain, night was falling. Their guests were still celebrating as the moon rose into the sky. “Ah, a full moon!” the priest said. “A good omen.” Then he slumped against a boulder and fell asleep, full of good food and plum wine. Ryuichi and Kaji ate a bit of wedding food and toasted each other with plum wine. Then Ryuichi said, “It grows late.” Kaji trotted off, laughing. “Follow me!” Ryuichi ran along behind, wondering what delights the night would bring after the day had been so magical. He found himself outside a little house with a neat, enclosed garden. In the shrine, a flame burned merrily, and the door to the house was open. “In here!” Kaji called. Ryuichi entered the dark house. He followed the sound of Kaji’s voice and noted a change in it, a darkening and a richness that the fox voice did not have. Kaji must have taken human form. Excited, entranced, Ryuichi began to loosen his clothing.
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 10 He found the sleeping room and saw a vague outline of the futon, and the pale curve of an arm and shoulder. Ryuichi stripped off his robes and slipped under the coverlet, taking his new wife into his arms and kissing her deeply. And sprang away from her—him—as if bitten. “What?” Ryuichi shouted. “What mischief is this?” He fumbled for a light while Kaji calmly told him to stop being so foolish and come back to bed. “You’re a man!” Ryuichi said. Kaji sighed and held out his hand; a ball of foxfire took shape on his palm and illuminated the room. “I’m a kitsuné.” He set the kitsuné-bi on the floor and brushed a lock of dark red hair away from his face. His eyes were golden in the unearthly light. “A male one? You never told me.” “You never asked, Ryuichi-san.” He didn’t know if he was more angry or disappointed. “This isn’t possible.” “Why not?” “Men do not marry men.” “You married a kitsuné. Many men marry kitsuné.” Ryuichi said nothing for several minutes. He stared at the biseinen, the handsome young man on the futon, and wondered how this had happened, how he had allowed himself to be taken in by this creature. Finally, he said
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 11 coldly, “It was not a true marriage ceremony; therefore, we are not married.” Kaji’s reply was equally cool. “It was as true as any other. We had the blessing of the kami and even of the sky. It only rains out of a cloudless sky at a kitsuné wedding. Why are you so upset, husband? Before you took me in your arms, you thought yourself the luckiest man on earth. And now? You look as if you had seen an evil ghost.” “I am not your husband.” “You are.” “It is not possible!” Ryuichi shouted again. Kaji glared at him. “We made a bargain, you and I. I have given you all you asked for.” “And in return, you asked for a marriage, which you have had. That is an end to it.” Ryuichi gathered up his clothing and prepared to leave the house, but Kaji asked, “And how if your luck changes again?” “If it does, I will come back and strike off your head with my sword before I take my own life.” He left before the kitsuné could say another word and went to sleep under the almond tree where he had left his armor. But sleep wouldn’t come, for outraged as he was, Ryuichi was nevertheless an honorable man, and he knew that because he had bargained in good faith with Kaji, he now owed the kitsuné what he had promised: to be a loyal and loving spouse. Whatever that entailed.
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 12 It wasn’t as if he had never encountered such a situation. Among the samurai, male love was not unknown, and often it was spoken of even more reverently than the joining of men and women. He had never taken a male lover, but he was not opposed to the idea in principle. He had never been interested in another man in that way, nor had any man sought his favors. His anger was based only on the fact that he felt tricked, and in truth, he had helped trick himself. It was always a risk to bargain with a kami, especially a kitsuné, for they were clever creatures and enjoyed a good joke. He sat up against the trunk of the almond tree and thought about his situation. Truly, he was no worse off than he had been a day earlier. In fact, things were far better. He had a position and had been accepted by Kaji’s clan. There was no reason to think that he would not prosper. There would be no son, of course, but if he died this day or the next or the next, there would still be no son. So, with a sigh, Ryuichi got up from his seat beneath the almond tree and walked back to Kaji’s house. He sat down on the futon beside his new husband and said, “I do not fear your wrath, Kaji-san, or the loss of my life, as you know. But I have found my honor today and will not again spend it so lightly. I will abide by all the laws of heaven and earth which recognize our marriage. But,” he continued, “I confess I have no experience of this sort of love, nor do I think I have the desire for it. I will do what I can to be a good husband to you. I do not know what more I can give.” Kaji touched his shoulder. “It’s enough, Ryuichi. I don’t want you to be unhappy.”
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 13 Ryuichi finally was able to look Kaji in the eye. “Why me? Why did you want me as a husband?” “Like calls to like, anata.” Kaji leaned forward and touched his lips sweetly to Ryuichi’s. After a moment of surprise, the samurai found it in himself to return the kiss. He wrapped an arm around Kaji’s waist and pulled him close, cradling the sharp-featured face with his other hand. If he was going to be a husband, he reasoned, he would find some way to be a good one. So he held his lover close and lost himself in a rain of kisses. Once he got past the oddness of not finding breasts where breasts should have been and of touching another man’s penis, it was not so different as he had feared. Kaji was young and beautiful, with a dark mahogany mane of hair and golden eyes rimmed with long dark lashes. His mouth was generous, and his lips were sweet with plum wine. They kissed for a long time—deep, searching kisses. Their touches were like flame. To his surprise, Ryuichi found himself growing hard in Kaji’s hand. “Let me give you pleasure, Ryuichi,” Kaji whispered as he straddled his new husband, gripping both their cocks in one hand and stroking them slowly and firmly. Ryuichi lay back and let the feelings wash over him. Never had he imagined that the feel of another man’s penis against his own could be so exciting, so pleasurable. Kaji leaned forward, trapping their erections between them, and began a languid thrusting of his hips. Ryuichi grasped Kaji’s backside and pulled him closer, whispering, “Harder.”
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 14 Kaji obliged, rubbing up against Ryuichi so that the sensations grew more intense. Ryuichi began to lift to meet each thrust. “Give yourself over to it,” Kaji urged, and with a groan Ryuichi began to climax, seed spilling between their sweat-slicked bodies. He fell back; he was dimly aware of Kaji still rubbing against him, and finally the feel of Kaji’s ejaculation against his own spent cock. So that is what it’s like to have a man. Ryuichi was half aware of a desire to do this remarkable thing again, to move against a hard body, a body that would not yield or break under him but which could meet him and match him. He wrapped his arms around his new husband and buried his face in the brush of mahogany-colored hair. “Did I do well?” he whispered. “Very well indeed, anata. I gather you enjoyed it?” “Very much. To my surprise,” he admitted. He kissed the top of Kaji’s head and closed his eyes. He knew that he could sleep now.
KAJI’S word was good. In the three years since their marriage, Ryuichi flourished in his new position, rising through the ranks of Jurōjin’s samurai to become one of the old man’s personal guards. Jurōjin was a kami and he had many supernatural enemies who could only be vanquished through supernatural means. None of the other samurai had a kami husband who could teach them the tricks of magic needed to protect Jurōjin as Ryuichi did. His cleverness and skill became legend among his fellow samurai.
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 15 His relationship with Kaji grew stronger too. He learned how to give pleasure to a man and learned to enjoy it. There were things he simply would not do—he would never allow Kaji to mount him—but they adapted to each other’s wills and desires fairly easily, and there was so little friction between them that Ryuichi again recognized how fortunate he was in his spouse, for he knew of few couples who agreed so well both in the bedroom and out of it. And in truth, many of the other samurai, once they knew about Kaji, seemed to envy Ryuichi. For some, it was that he was now part of a powerful kitsuné clan. And there were other reasons, not all of which made Ryuichi happy. The captain of Jurōjin’s guards had more than a respectful eye for Kaji. His flirting annoyed Ryuichi, though he said nothing about it to either the guard or Kaji. It was one weakness he was not prepared to show to anyone else. Not long after Captain Kuroki began to take a lively interest in Kaji, Ryuichi became aware that one of the ladies of the house, a distant relative of Jurōjin’s, was interested in him. As Kaji did nothing to discourage the captain, neither did Ryuichi discourage Lady Kittigawa. He was after all a man, he told himself, and a man who had always loved women. His marriage had been one of convenience, and many married men took mistresses. Kaji could hardly complain; like Ryuichi, he had promised loyalty, yet his behavior around Kuroki was less disinterested than it should have been. As for the lady, she made numerous excuses to be alone with Ryuichi and took every opportunity to happen upon him by “coincidence” in the garden or along one of the paths from
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 16 the castle to a nearby hot spring. Several times he came close to declaring his interest but could not bring himself to take the final step, though he often imagined what would follow if he ever did. One day, quite by accident, he was walking along that same path when he spied some movement in the bushes nearby. Though he felt certain it was just an animal moving through the undergrowth, nevertheless he was bound by duty to investigate. He came upon the place quietly so as not to startle whatever lay there and parted the screening vines carefully. Bowered amidst the flowering shrubs was Kaji, being enthusiastically mounted by the captain. Ryuichi stepped back in horror, letting the vines fall to screen the lovers. He had always heard that kitsuné could be flighty and were not to be trusted, but he thought Kaji was different, that he was as steady as the flame that burned in their house shrine. In his heart, Ryuichi had never believed Kaji would allow his flirtation with the captain to go so far. Ryuichi backed away and walked on, barely able to think, heart breaking over the betrayal. He reached the spring almost without realizing it, and found Lady Kittigawa submerged in the hot water, her black hair spread out upon the rocks behind her. She must have heard him because she turned to look, and instead of sending him away as she should have, she smiled. “Fujiwara-san, what a coincidence,” she said sweetly. Then she stood slowly, allowing him to see the beauty of her body, her breasts like firm little oranges, her rounded hips, the plump mound between her legs shaded by silken black hair,
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 17 and her beautiful buttocks and legs. “Would you like to join me?” she asked. “The water is so very hot and relaxing.” He walked toward her and caught hold of her arm, pulling her close. His mouth covered hers roughly, but she did not cry out or complain. Rather, she yielded to the kiss with ardor and begged him for more. “I have longed for your mouth on mine, your hands on my body,” she told him even as his misery broke open inside his heart and mind, and he pulled away from her. Strangely he felt nothing like desire, only a great and heavy sadness. “I cannot.” “I desire you, Fujiwara-san, as you do me. Why deny it? When both desire the act, where is the dishonor?” He looked up at her. “It is not honor that keeps me from you, my lady, but love. And heartbreak. Farewell.” He turned to go. There were tears in his eyes, for now he knew that he loved his fox husband with all the passion and devotion he could ever have felt for a woman. But the fox had betrayed him. A sob caught in his throat as he stumbled back along the path, half-blind with unshed tears. “Husband, don’t leave me.” It was Kaji’s voice behind him, not the lady’s. He turned to find that it was Kaji standing in the pool. Ryuichi’s voice was rough with anger and pain. “What lie is this?” “Truth,” Kaji replied. “Come back to me now, and I will tell you the story.”
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 18 Ryuichi did not move. Could not move. “Come back to me, anata, dear one. Please?” “What did I see? Who was it with the captain?” “No one. No captain, no Kaji. It was an illusion.” Ryuichi sat down beside the pool and wiped his eyes on his sleeve. “Why? Why would you break my heart like that?” “Ryuichi-kun, you are a man of honor. But I wanted more. I wanted your heart. I made a vow to myself that if you turned a blind eye to the illusion of my infidelity or made love to Lady Kittigawa, then I would know you could never love me as I love you, and it would be time to let you go.” “Let me go?” “Tell you that our bargain was complete as far as I was concerned. That you had given me a fine marriage and a great deal of happiness in exchange for your luck, and we would have parted as friends. You would have been free to seek a wife and I to find another mate.” “But why did you not just ask me?” Ryuichi asked. “Why make my heart ache with unhappiness?” “Forgive me; I did not know that it would hurt you so. I did not know you loved me.” His words startled Ryuichi, who realized that though he had been a good husband, he had never been a truly loving one. He had always held something back. “You are my heart,” he said quietly. “I should have told you.”
Kitsuné Wedding | Tracy Rowan 19 “You just have.” Kaji smiled. Ryuichi’s heart was so filled with love for his little fox that he scooped Kaji up into his arms and kissed him with a kind of joy he had never before felt. Kaji laughed with happiness. “Kaji-kun, you are my heart; you burn within my soul,” Ryuichi murmured between kisses, and they fell, laughing, into the pool of hot water. Kaji was ready to be frisky, but Ryuichi stopped him. “I have duties to perform, and now I shall have to perform them soaking wet. You are trouble.” He said it with a smile. Kaji’s grin was unrepentant. “You can count on that.” “And how is it you can become a woman?” Ryuichi demanded, wringing out his clothing. “Why have I never seen that before?” “You never asked.” Ryuichi shook his head and sighed. “Then go home and wait for me. I will have many questions for you tonight, Kajikun.” “And I shall have many answers for you,” Kaji promised. He gave Ryuichi a sidelong glance from beneath his long lashes. “Shall I wait as a woman?” he asked seductively. Ryuichi considered the question for a moment and said, “If you are who you truly are, I shall always love you. But in truth, I think I would prefer to return home to the Kaji I have come to know.” And once again, rain fell out of a cloudless sky onto the lovers.
About the Author
TRACY ROWAN has lived in Chicago all her life. She’s been a bookseller, an artist, a crafter, an office worker, a teacher, and a long-term caregiver. After all that, writing seemed like the logical next step. She lives in a craftsman-style two-flat with Glinda the good witch and her two furry nephews. They spend a lot of time decorating, hanging with their friends, and laughing.
Copyright
Kitsuné Wedding ©Copyright Tracy Rowan, 2011 Published by Dreamspinner Press 4760 Preston Road Suite 244-149 Frisco, TX 75034 http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/ This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the authors’ imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental. Cover Art by Anne Cain
[email protected] Cover Design by Mara McKennen This book is licensed to the original purchaser only. Duplication or distribution via any means is illegal and a violation of International Copyright Law, subject to criminal prosecution and upon conviction, fines and/or imprisonment. This eBook cannot be legally loaned or given to others. No part of this eBook can be shared or reproduced without the express permission of the publisher. To request permission and all other inquiries, contact Dreamspinner Press at: 4760 Preston Road, Suite 244-149, Frisco, TX 75034 http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/ Released in the United States of America March 2011 eBook Edition eBook ISBN: 978-1-61581-785-6
