Forgiving Jason

A Total-E-Bound Publication

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Forgiving Jason ISBN # 978-0-85715-604-4 ©Copyright Serena Yates 2011 Cover Art by Posh Gosh ©Copyright July 2011 Edited by Stacey Birkel Total-E-Bound Publishing This is a work of fiction. All characters, places and events are from the author’s imagination and should not be confused with fact. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, events or places is purely coincidental. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form, whether by printing, photocopying, scanning or otherwise without the written permission of the publisher, Total-E-Bound Publishing. Applications should be addressed in the first instance, in writing, to Total-E-Bound Publishing. Unauthorised or restricted acts in relation to this publication may result in civil proceedings and/or criminal prosecution. The author and illustrator have asserted their respective rights under the Copyright Designs and Patents Acts 1988 (as amended) to be identified as the author of this book and illustrator of the artwork. Published in 2011 by Total-E-Bound Publishing, Think Tank, Ruston Way, Lincoln, LN6 7FL, United Kingdom.

Warning: This book contains sexually explicit content which is only suitable for mature readers. This story has been rated Total-e-burning.

Men of Riverside

FORGIVING JASON Serena Yates

Dedication For those who never give up hope that luck, determination and love may bring separated lovers back together for the happy ending we all crave.

Trademarks Acknowledgement The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of the following wordmarks mentioned in this work of fiction: Honda Civic: Honda Motor Company, Ltd. Ford: Ford Motor Company Mazda: Mazda Motor Corporation Carfax: Carfax, Inc.

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Chapter One

Riverside, Texas Saturday August 16, 2008 Shit, there were a lot of cars on display at his brother’s dealership. Steve Jacobi walked around in a daze. The sun beat down on the asphalt under his feet in the relentless way it had during summer. He was already thirstier than he wanted to think about, but this was an important day for him and he wasn’t going to interrupt his information-gathering because it was almost too hot to breathe. He’d wanted his own car for so long, and now that his savings finally covered something less than a decade old, he was spoilt for choice. Carefully working his way along the lot’s perimeter, he made detailed notes. He needed a practical, reliable sedan or hatchback that would get him to and from work, and maybe the occasional weekend fishing trip to Moon Lake, an hour or so south of Riverside. What he really wanted was one of the flashier, slightly newer sports cars that would probably break down at the first opportunity and saddle him with a lot of maintenance and repair costs to boot. But, oh, it would be such fun driving it along the highway. He snorted at the thought. His co-workers would probably laugh their asses off, asking whom he was trying to impress. Since there was no fiancée, not even a girlfriend, he’d be wondering the same thing. Not that he was going to change his secret preferences just because he had a new car or anything. “May I help you, sir?” The smooth male voice came from straight behind him “Um…” Steve turned around, startled by the interruption. The salesman who stood before him, wearing a friendly smile and a charcoal grey suit that made him look like a model fresh off the runway, was a good six inches shorter than Steve’s own six feet. He was slim, but had a strong upper body that filled the suit jacket well. His face was delicate, almost elfin in its beauty, topped off by short, blond hair with a nice

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wave. But the best part was his grey-green eyes. They peered at him with an intensity that made his cock stir in his suddenly tight pants. The man looked awfully familiar. His head tilted as his gorgeous eyes crinkled at the corners and the smile gained in depth, now reflecting real emotion. “Steve?” The salesman’s grin grew wider. “Is that really you?” “Jason?” He had a hard time keeping his mouth from falling open. “Jason Fortin?” God, the kid who’d been two years behind him in high school had sure grown up. Jason had always been good-looking, very popular and had gone out with every single cheerleader during Steve’s senior year. But he’d filled out some since then, and the interest now reflected in his gaze was more than disconcerting. What was up with that? Jason had always been straight. Surely it was too much to hope for him to have changed that much. “Man, it’s good to see you.” Jason stuck out a hand. “What have you been up to?” “Not much.” Steve shrugged as they shook hands, not wanting to go into his lack of professional success. It was a sore point at the best of times, and he had no intention of sharing his lack of accomplishments with Jason, who had obviously done very well for himself. Shit, the man was a salesman at one of the largest car dealers in Riverside just over two years out of high school. Steve’s older brother, Tim, had taken over the car dealership from their parents last year when they’d retired to Arizona, and had made it a huge success by reaching out to younger customers. What was his job as a mere window washer compared to that? “I don’t believe that.” Jason let go of his hand much more slowly than expected. “Right now’s not the time to get into that, but I’d love to find out what you’ve been up to. Maybe we can go for a drink or something later tonight?” “Sure.” Was Jason asking him out? Shit, he had to get his libido under control. He was too much of a coward to do anything about the attraction he felt, and nothing about Jason indicated that he was even remotely interested in him other than as a potential buddy. “Okay, we can agree the details later.” Jason looked around the lot, waving his hand in a circular motion. “See anything you like?” “It’s more about finding what I need.” He hated admitting it, but it was the sad truth. Jason frowned for a second, but his smile quickly returned.

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“I’m sure I can help you with that as well.” Jason pointed at a group of vehicles in the eastern corner of the lot. “We’ve got several of what you might call the more practical makes over there. A lot of people are looking for more reliable, lower cost and fuel models these days, so we’ve created an area for the cars fulfilling that demand. Would they be closer to what you’re looking for?” “Yes, they would be.” He followed Jason to the indicated corner, carefully wiping the beads of sweat from his forehead as they walked. He was relieved to see that the price tags matched his budget much better that those of the cars he’d been looking at so far. “That’s pretty clever.” “Well, yes, my boss has this knack of finding out what his customers want then making it happen. Many of the older salesmen attacked him for ruining a system that’s always worked, but you can’t really argue with success, can you? We sell a lot more cars now than we used to, even if a lot of them are the cheaper models.” Jason grinned. “Apparently a lot has changed since Tim took over, but, since I started working here about the same time that his parents left, I never noticed the difference.” “Yeah, my brother is pretty clever like that.” And I’m not. They looked at the different models for a while, Jason being pretty helpful about the details and any questions Steve came up with. When he narrowed it down to about three choices, another salesman suddenly approached them. He was about Steve’s height, probably mid-thirties and with the air of the much maligned used-car salesman from comedy shows and commercials. He wore the same charcoal suit that Jason did, but it didn’t look half as good on him as it did on Jason’s trim physique. His dark hair was combed back and held in place with some sort of gel, and his brown eyes sparkled with artificial helpfulness. “Leo?” Jason had taken a step back from the new arrival and looked at him with narrowed eyes. “Hi, Jase.” Leo stepped back into Jason’s personal space. Jason took another step back. What was up with that? “Just checking to see if everything is all right?” Leo turned his smarmy gaze on to Steve. What was the man’s problem? Jason had mentioned that Tim was his boss, so he couldn’t be checking up on Jason in an official capacity. Because it sure felt like checking up to Steve, and Jason’s reaction spoke volumes.

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“Yes, thank you, we’re just fine.” He wanted to add “Now go away” but didn’t feel he was entitled. “Are you sure I can’t interest you in one of the newer models we have available here?” Leo pointed at a section clearly reserved for sleek sports cars. “I’m sure.” Steve cleared his throat, not liking how subdued Jason had suddenly become. “Jason here is doing a fine job, so there’s no need for you to get involved.” “Okay, if you’re sure.” Leo’s lips turned downwards, but he started to move away. “Let me know if there is anything I can do for you.” Steve waited until Leo was out of earshot before he spoke to Jason. “What’s his problem?” He’d rarely seen a more obvious attempt to steal another guy’s business. “Oh, don’t mind him.” Jason rubbed the back of his neck. “He’s one of the older salesmen I mentioned. He thinks he can sell a more expensive car to anyone, make a higher commission. Normally, he doesn’t even come near this area with the ‘cheap cars’, as he calls them. Well, except to try and convince people to spend more money on a car they may not need and definitely don’t want.” “But he tried to steal your customer while he was at it.” Steve shook his head. “That’s pretty nasty.” “It is what it is.” Jason dropped his hand, the smile slowly returning. “Now, how about the cars we’ve been looking at. Would any of them work for you?” “Yes, I kind of like the Honda.” He was still upset about Leo’s tactics, but if Jason was willing to let it go, who was he to interfere? “Great! Would you like to think on it some more? We do one-page information sheets with the key data, so if you want to take that home for the Honda and maybe the Ford and the Mazda you were looking at? Of course, you should also check the Carfax reports for each of them—that will give you the vehicles’ histories.” “That’s a great offer, but I think I’ve made up my mind.” He grinned when Jason’s eyes lit up. “The Honda?” Jason bounced on the balls of his feet, all enthusiasm. “Yep, that’s the one.” He nodded and smiled back. Jason’s grin was infectious.

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“Okay, in that case, please follow me.” Jason pointed at the main building. “We can do all the necessary paperwork in my office. At least I can offer you a cup of coffee to tide you over until that beer we’re going to have tonight.” Clearly, Jason wasn’t one to give up easily. He’d apparently been dead serious about the offer to go out for drinks. Steve sighed as he followed his new friend into the thankfully air-conditioned office. He hadn’t been to see Tim at work, or anywhere else, for a long time, but nothing much had changed inside. The most expensive cars were still displayed in the large interior room. Carefully positioned plants near the walls created small areas of quiet, little tables loaded with brochures hiding behind them. There was a certain buzz about the place as salespeople and a few customers discussed arrangements. “Hey, Steve, it’s good to see you!” Tim beamed at him as he walked out of the corner office that overlooked the huge room. His brother was well over six feet tall and an imposing figure with his broad shoulders and powerful legs. Both were displayed to advantage in his light blue summer suit. He had the Jacobi dark curly hair, skin that was an even darker brown than Steve’s, and eyes that were closer to black than brown. All in all, Tim was the spitting image of their father, while Steve’s looks reflected more of their white mother’s heritage. “Same here.” He returned Tim’s hug before stepping back, slightly embarrassed about the enthusiastic greeting. “It’s been too long.” Tim’s smile became slightly strained. “I’ve been busy.” And not willing to be confronted with his brother’s perfect life. Tim opened his mouth, thought better of saying anything, closed it, and nodded. “So, you’re here to buy a car?” Tim smiled at Jason before looking back at Steve. “I hope Jason took excellent care of you. He’s not been salesman of the month for eight out of the last twelve months for nothing. Best hiring decision I ever made.” “Thank you.” Jason blushed the most adorable pink, and his smile widened. Gorgeous. The man was simply gorgeous. “Yes, he did.” He wanted to make Jason smile like that again. “I’ve decided which one I want and we were just going to do the paperwork.” “Excellent!” Tim slapped Jason’s back. “I’ll leave you to it then. But, Steve, please don’t be a stranger? I know we don’t have the advantage of Mom cooking Sunday dinner for us

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any longer, making us share a family meal once a week. But I’d love to see more of you, even if we just go to a restaurant or something. Please?” “Okay.” He wasn’t sure about this at all. Tim might pick a more expensive place than he was willing to pay for, but maybe seeing his brother on a more regular basis would be worth a little extra expense. “Okay. I can’t make it this week because I’m playing basketball with my co-workers on Sunday afternoon. But I’ll give you a call about next week, all right?” “Sure, that would be great.” Tim hugged him again and withdrew into his office. “So, what about that paperwork?” He was a little embarrassed about Jason having heard all that family stuff. “No problem, man, just take a seat over there and I’ll get the necessary documents.” Jason pointed at a small office about halfway between Tim’s office and the next corner as he led the way. Almost an hour later, he’d signed more forms than he cared to remember and a credit check had been completed. He wrote a cheque for half the value of the car, which Tim had accepted from his brother with an ‘I know where you live’ kind of smile. Steve was now the proud owner of a 2001 Honda Civic, forest green and hopefully with a lot of miles left to go. He couldn’t wait to start driving it rather than using the bus all the time. Even though Riverside public transportation was good, a man had his pride. It was high time for his own four wheels. “So, ready for a beer or two?” Jason leant back, having handed him the keys. “Only if I can walk home from where we decide to go.” He caressed the keys, welcoming the feeling of their slightly ragged edges against his skin. “I’m not going to take a risk with my new possession.” “Got it.” Jason chuckled. “Not too sure about places near where you live, but how about that new Irish pub on Main and Fourth? I think it’s called Fitzpatrick’s Inn. The location is pretty central and I’d be happy to give you a ride home since I can’t drink in public anyway.” “Shit, man, that’s right, I totally forgot. Ever since I finally turned twenty-one in March it’s stopped being an issue for me. Tell you what—to be fair, I’m going to stick to soda as well. That way I get to take out my new car.” That was much better than going back to taking the bus or having to pay for a cab. “And I’ve wanted to try that place for a while now, so it’s all good. Give me—what, a couple of hours?—before we meet there.”

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“That’s right, you have a car to christen.” Jason grinned and nodded. “I’ll see you there at seven, then.” “Seven it is.” He got up and walked to his new car, a slight spring in his step. A short drive out of the city was in order, which he planned to follow with a quick shower before making his way to the pub. And why the hell did that meeting for drinks feel like a date? Was it his inexplicably strong attraction to Jason? It wasn’t like he’d never felt attracted to another man, but those feelings had been pretty easy to ignore so far. He liked women as well, after all, and going out with them was more accepted. Since he’d never been one to rock the boat, he’d always figured he’d stick with that. But none of them had made him feel as interested at this early stage as Jason had. He got into the car, his attention momentarily on making sure the mirrors were adjusted correctly. Pulling the seatbelt across himself and listening to the click with a new owner’s satisfaction distracted him further. The next half hour was pure bliss. He almost didn’t want to turn around towards home. But he had a date, and he was curious to see what would happen.

**** Jason wasn’t exactly new at dating. He’d done his share in high school, even though it had been only girls, not the boys he’d really been interested in. He hadn’t changed his tactics or slowed down since then. After all, he had a reputation to uphold. Being the most popular guy around had its price, and fitting into the image of what was right, at least according to the majority, was part of that. He’d never met anyone interesting enough to divert from that strategy. Until today. Man, seeing Steve again had sure jolted him awake. The man had looked good ever since he’d first noticed him in high school. He’d grown to at least six feet, his shoulders were even broader than they’d been before, and his chest and arm muscles had been barely contained by the straining navy T-shirt. The back view when he’d first approached what he thought was just another customer had been as delectable, with an ass to die for covered by tight jeans shorts.

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But it was the front view that had done Jason in. The chocolate brown skin alone made him want to lick the man all over. Combined with the soulful dark brown eyes, the full, red lips, and the square jaw, there was only one word to sum it all up. Irresistible. He’d had a crush on Steve in high school but had lost touch after the older man’s graduation. He’d always been more of his older brother William’s friend anyway, much to Jason’s dismay. And with William away at Harvard, there’d been no opportunities for staying in touch. At least none that would have been less than obvious. Now, though, Jason was ready to be obvious. He didn’t even care whether the man was as straight as he seemed to remember. Just spending time with Steve would be better than nothing. If they could become friends, there was always hope for more. Just look at Zeke and Ben. His eldest brother, Zeke, had always seemed as straight as they came, had even been engaged to that bitch, Claudia, for years. Ben, the detective, had never given any indication of being gay, either. And yet, from talking to Zeke since he’d moved back to Riverside at the end of June, both of them had discovered that their friendship had grown into more over the years. Zeke had even admitted to having been attracted to Ben before he’d ever got engaged. Keeping up a front of being straight had apparently seemed as wise to Zeke as it always had to Jason. He grinned. Maybe it ran in the family? Not just the being gay, but hiding it until they met the man they were ready to break all the rules for. Their parents had taken Zeke’s coming out a lot better than expected, but what would they say if they found out that Jason leaned the same way? Had for years, in fact—he’d just never acted on it. He was so ready to act on it now, though—his erection tangible proof of his excitement at the thought of Steve looking at him with desire. He wanted the man’s lips on his and his arms around his body. Anywhere would do, as long as he got to touch that amazing body. His cock definitely agreed. He took off his work clothes so he could take a shower, a little surprised at how hard he already was just thinking about Steve. While their meeting could just be interpreted as guys having a drink to catch up, it sure felt like a whole lot more. Man, he had it bad. He turned on the water, waiting for it to warm up before he stepped into the shower. Letting the warm spray massage first his back, then his front after he turned around, he gave his imagination free rein. Grabbing the soap, he started to clean himself, but in his mind it

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wasn’t his own hands that caressed his body. Steve’s much larger fingers traced his pectorals, caressing each nipple before trailing downwards to follow the barely visible trail of hair to his eagerly waiting cock. Not touching himself the way he wanted to was deliciously exciting. Only after he’d completely cleaned himself and was ready for rinsing did he allow himself to close his hand around his erection. Imagining that it was Steve’s hands stroking him made him come faster than he ever had. Panting in surprise as much as from the jolts of ecstasy travelling through his body, he leaned his forehead against the cool tiles to catch his breath and calm down. He couldn’t wait to try this with Steve actually there. He could only hope for more stamina than he’d shown just now. Turning off the water, he got out of the shower and wrapped a towel round his waist. Getting dressed in jeans and a T-shirt happened in a haze of longing. When he checked himself in the mirror to make sure his hair didn’t look like he’d just been in a storm, he barely recognised the dreamy look on his face. Snap out of it! He couldn’t confront Steve looking like this. The man wouldn’t know what had hit him. It was way too early to be feeling like this anyway. He didn’t want to chase Steve away, after all. He made his way to Fitzpatrick’s, found a space to park his car and walked inside about ten minutes too early. Pathetic. At least he’d get a head start on getting a table. He had no intention of just having drinks standing up at the bar. Seeing Steve in line two couples ahead made him breathe a sigh of relief. At least he wasn’t the only eager one. He watched the man’s strong back and tight ass for a few seconds—not long enough for anyone to notice, but more than long enough for his cock to start hardening again. Yum! Stepping past the other couples, responding to their slight frowns with an apologetic grin, he tapped Steve on the shoulder. “Hey.” He stepped back to give Steve room. A beautiful smile spread across Steve’s face after the initial surprise. “I like a man who is on time.” He smiled right back. “Same here.” Steve pointed at the five people in line ahead of them. “I’m also very hungry and figured there might be a wait.” “Good deal.”

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And if Steve seemed slightly embarrassed about being here early, at least that meant Jason wasn’t alone. Maybe Steve was just as eager to make a new friend—or more—as Jason? By the end of the next two hours, after a delicious meal of bacon and cabbage, accompanied by dark beer for him and lemonade for Jason, they had discussed everything from sports to music to what had happened to them after they’d lost touch with each other. Steve had looked very hesitant when he’d told Jason he was a window washer, but when Jason had simply asked him questions about the job, he’d seemed to relax. Jason told Steve about his aborted career as a hair stylist, happy to make him laugh at some of the outrageous client stories he’d had to listen to. “Man, I don’t blame you for wanting to leave that behind. Just all that gossiping alone would drive me crazy.” Steve finished his beer and leant back in the comfortable booth seat. “So, what made you go work for my big brother?” “Actually, it was a suggestion from my big brother, Zeke.” Jason had desperately needed some time away from his worried parents. “He asked me to come see him in Austin and we had a few good talks. He told me more about his job as a real estate salesman. I couldn’t see myself selling real estate, but the idea of helping people find what they want sounded interesting.” “And from my own experience, I’ve got to say that you’re pretty good at it.” Steve smiled, showing his perfect white teeth. Jason melted, having a hard time hiding his attraction now. He shook his head, focussing on getting back to the story. “So Zeke suggested I go and talk to his former classmate and good friend, Tim Jacobi, who had just taken over his parents’ car dealership. That was in August last year, and I’ve never looked back.” Their waitress chose that moment to check if they wanted anything else. “I’d love some coffee.” Jason checked with Steve, who nodded. “We’ll take two, and some apple pie, what do you think?” “As long as we share.” Steve patted his nonexistent belly. “Sure.” Jason shook his head after the waitress left. “You have nothing to worry about.”

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“Not yet.” Steve laughed and sat up straight “It’s never too early to worry, though. Just look at my dad. He may be a lot older and has dealt with my mom’s excellent cooking for almost forty years, but still. I’d rather not go there, if you know what I mean.” Jason still thought Steve was worried for no reason, but he wasn’t going to get into a fight about it. They had more interesting topics to discuss. Like their joint love of fishing, which learning they shared had surprised them both. They’d already agreed to make a day of it next Saturday, with Steve’s new car providing the transportation to Moon Lake and Jason providing a picnic lunch and drinks. Once they’d had their coffee and paid the bill—separately upon Steve’s insistence— they wandered outside. It was dark but they quickly found their cars, which were only a few spaces apart. Their corner of the parking lot was particularly dark, and Jason wished he could take advantage of the cover and pull Steve in for a kiss. He’d only had very few encounters with other men, and none of them had made him want to kiss them as much as he wanted to kiss Steve right now. His brain told him it was much too early, but his cock disagreed. God, he wanted this man. Steve hesitated when he reached his car. He turned around, looking a little lost. “That was fun. Thanks for suggesting it.” Steve’s smile was hesitant. “Hey, I had fun too.” Jason needed to say something before it was too late, but what? If he didn’t come up with anything, he’d have to wait a whole week for their fishing date. “I don’t do a lot of this.” Steve winced, almost as if he’d said too much. “That didn’t come out right. What I meant was that I don’t spend a lot of time doing stuff like this with guys. They’ve all got girlfriends or fiancées and prefer to spend time with them.” “And you haven’t.” Jason nodded, grateful for the opening. “No.” Steve leant back against his car. “What about you?” “Not at the moment.” Hell, that didn’t sound right somehow. It was his usual response, but it made him sound so arrogant. Why had he never noticed this before? “In that case, there’s a game on Wednesday we might still be able to get tickets for.” Steve grinned. “Or we could go roller skating in the new rink they just finished.” “Roller skating?” He hadn’t done that since he was a teenager. “I like that idea.” “I’ll find out the details and we can figure out the best evening.” Steve stood up straight, suppressing a yawn. “Sorry, I think I’d better turn in.”

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“Yeah, same here.” Even though he was probably too keyed up to sleep, it had been a long day and he should at least try to get some rest. “I’ll call you sometime tomorrow, okay?” Steve opened his car, the grin on his face evident even in the semi-darkness. “Talk to you then.” Jason stood rooted to the spot as he watched Steve get into the car and drive off. Damn, it was going to be a long few days.

**** Luckily, the week turned out to be shorter than he’d feared. They went roller skating on Monday, which was more fun than was probably legal. They had both found their feet quite quickly, but not without a few spectacularly embarrassing falls in the beginning. He hadn’t laughed so hard in a long time. The tickets for the Wednesday game were sold out, but they’d ended up going for dinner in a tiny pizzeria on Seventh instead. Discussing some of the things Steve got to watch as he cleaned windows had been highly entertaining. Now it was finally Saturday morning. He’d packed a picnic lunch, as promised, and the drinks were in the cooler sitting by the door, alongside his fishing gear. He was ready to leave about an hour before Steve had agreed to pick him up. If he hadn’t been so excited, he’d be embarrassed. When Steve finally arrived, right on time, he looked as happy to be leaving as Jason felt. “I haven’t done this in ages.” Steve opened the trunk and they put the food inside. “Tim used to take me, but that was before Mom and Dad retired and he became too busy at work.” “I’ve been too busy working myself.” Jason put his fishing rods in the back of the car and got into the passenger seat. “You know, with the new job and trying to establish a reputation. But I feel more settled now that I know what I’m doing.” “Good, if that means we can do this more often?” Steve started the engine and drove towards the highway that would take them out of the city. “I sort of miss being away from all the noise and traffic once in a while.” “I know what you mean.” Jason relaxed back in his seat after a few miles, reassured by the safe way Steve was driving. “I would like doing this on a regular basis.”

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Steve’s smile made him melt and he had the hardest time not to let his physical reactions show. While Steve evidently wasn’t one to be afraid of the odd touch, Jason was still no closer to knowing whether the man would be open to all the things Jason had imagined doing to him. In his fantasies, they had gone way beyond kissing and he couldn’t wait to see if reality measured up to his imagination. Once they arrived at the lake, they quickly found a deserted bay and set up their stuff for easy access to bait for the fish and sodas for them. They were comfortable together, bumping shoulders, handling the bait and the few fish they caught. The long silences as they stared out over the water were relaxing, and all the stress from work was forgotten by lunchtime. Jason spread out the blanket he’d brought and laid out the bread, mayo, pickles and sandwich meats he’d packed along. Potato salad, apples, a selection of cookies and a thermos of coffee completed the meal. “I’m stuffed.” Steve wiped a few crumbs off his luscious lips and lay back on the blanket. “Same here.” Jason lay down next to him, making sure their shoulders and upper arms touched as he pretended to be interested in the leaves above them. Steve tensed for a moment but didn’t move away. Jason had never longed to kiss another man as much as at that moment. But he knew moving too fast could cost him everything. He needed to be patient. When Steve’s large hand touched his before hesitantly twining their fingers together, he almost stopped breathing. How was he supposed to keep himself from pouncing on the other man now?

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Chapter Two

Steve’s heart beat faster than after a gruelling workout—a different exertion, more intense somehow. Feeling Jason’s hand against his, skin to skin, was more thrilling than he’d imagined. And he’d done a lot of fantasising over the past week, supplementing their real encounters with imagined ones. Today had been absolutely perfect so far, and with Jason right next to him in this totally secluded place, the temptation of touching him had been too much. The need to find out what it felt like to hold another man’s hand had been overwhelming. More than that, he really liked Jason and suspected that the excitement coursing through his veins was more than half owing to it being Jason whose warm fingers and palms responded to his touch. The connection made thrilling tingles travel up his arms and seemingly straight to his cock. And Jason let him touch, hadn’t moved away one bit. Steve closed his eyes and lay there, breathing in and out as he listened to the leaves rustling in the wind. He didn’t dare move for fear of ending the magical moment. When he heard Jason’s contented little sigh, he was relieved he wasn’t alone in his enjoyment of the moment. He opened his eyes and turned his head to the right so he could look at Jason. “Hey.” Jason’s sparkling grey-green eyes were full of desire. Wow! “Hey.” Steve tightened his fingers for a moment. Jason squeezed his hand back and smiled. There was so much to say, but he had no idea where to start. This felt very different from any of his encounters with women. The understanding between them was implicit and already deeper after a week than it had been after several months with the two girlfriends he’d had. Their silences were comfortable and their dates had been more active and fun than just going out to dinner or a movie, although their visit to the Trattoria Alfonzo had been nice as well. Steve moved his fingers along Jason’s experimentally, looking into his eyes the whole time. He looked curious, eyebrows slightly raised and eyes wide open. Jason was probably as

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surprised at what was going on as he was. The thought of doing more took hold of him and wouldn’t let go. More delicious tingles travelled up his arm and his groin tightened. Was he ready for more? Hell yes! “I want to kiss you.” Shit, he hadn’t wanted to blurt it out like that. “Straight from the heart,” Jason laughed and nodded. “I would like that a lot.” “Yeah?” Steve turned onto his side, raising himself on his elbow as he pulled their hands up between their bodies. He wasn’t ready to let go. “Please.” Jason blushed. “I’ve never kissed a man before.” “Good.” He smiled. “That means we both get to try something new at the same time.” Steve brought up his left hand, cupping Jason’s face and caressing the soft skin with his thumb as he bent closer. Jason’s eyes widened and his tongue darted out to wet his lips. It made Steve want to follow its example. He bent down and kissed the corners of Jason’s mouth. His lips were soft, making Steve want to try again. So he did, placing light kisses along his lower lip, then his upper. The feeling of light stubble against his mouth was so different from kissing a woman. It excited him and spurred him on to try more. Jason whimpered softly when he pulled back, his pupils were dilated and his breathing was faster than when they’d started. That was all the encouragement he needed. Returning his full attention to kissing Jason, he brought their lips back into contact. Jason greeted him by moving his head upwards, so they were even closer. Hot breath fanned across his skin as the other man breathed deeply. He brushed his mouth back and forth across Jason’s, trying to make him whimper again. When he did, Steve lost all restraint. Pressing in more closely, he let his tongue move into Jason’s welcoming mouth. Licking into the welcoming heat, he tasted coffee and chocolate at first. He pushed his tongue deeper and gently caressed Jason’s until there was a darker flavour. Something spicy that was strong and made his head spin. He slid his left hand behind Jason’s neck to support him as he deepened the kiss. It went from gentle exploration to passionate encounter when Jason started to kiss him back,

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returning the curiosity by pushing into Steve’s mouth. He moaned and sucked on Jason’s tongue for all he was worth. The resulting tightness in his pants was as immediate as it was urgent. He pulled back before the temptation to slide over the other man to start humping him became unmanageable. Separating from Jason’s eager lips was hard, but he needed to breathe as well as try to regain some control. “Wow.” Jason laid his head back onto the blanket, his gaze not wavering from Steve’s. “Wow is right.” Steve moved his hand downwards until it rested on Jason’s chest. He could feel the heart beating against the other man’s ribs. It mirrored his own state of pleasant tension. “So you’re not straight?” Jason blinked, an embarrassed grin spreading across his face. “Sorry, that didn’t sound right at all.” “But it does express what you feel, doesn’t it?” Steve pulled back farther and let go of Jason’s hand so he could support his half-raised posture more easily. “Kind of.” Jason nodded. “Doesn’t mean I have a right to ask you that.” “Why not?” He frowned. “If not you, who else could possibly have a right to know?” “That’s true.” Jason took a deep breath. “This past week of getting to know you has been pretty amazing. I have no idea where it’s going, or if it’s going anywhere, but I think we need to talk about it before we continue—or not, whatever. Have I confused you yet?” “No, but you’re getting there. “ Steve liked this flustered side of Jason as much as the fun-loving side of him he’d discovered during their roller skating adventure. “Oh, sorry.” Jason looked away. “No, don’t be.” Steve moved his hand from Jason’s chest to grab his chin and carefully pushed until he looked at him again. “I was joking, okay?” Jason smiled and stopped frowning. “So, back to the original question.” Steve cleared his throat. It was his turn to feel embarrassed. “I’ve never told anyone this, but you’re right, I’m not straight.” “I had no idea.” Jason’s frown was back. “Well, it’s not something I have advertised, exactly.” He chuckled. “The thing is that I’ve felt attracted to both men and women. I’ve just never had the courage to act on any of my feelings towards a man—until today, with you.”

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“So you’re bisexual?” Jason’s eyes widened. “If you want to be technical about it, yes.” It would take some getting used to this label being applied to him. He’d never even dared think it to himself. “What about you? I was sure you were straight, with the number of cheerleaders you dated in high school.” “Yeah, well, I figured it was easier that way, you know?” Jason looked away, then back with a sigh. “So it was all a ruse?” Steve felt more relieved than he’d admit. “I guess. I never set out to deceive people, but it was always easier to do what was expected.” Jason blinked. “My older brothers were always so perfect. Zeke, with his ability to make money from anything he touched. My dad always saw him as taking over the family business. And William is more intelligent than you can imagine, so he was perfect in his own way. I was never that good in school, so I didn’t have anything they could be proud of. I didn’t want to give them a reason to be ashamed of me.” “But you said they were okay with Zeke being gay.” Steve’s heart hurt at the desolation he detected in Jason’s voice. “That’s now, years later. I’m not sure they’d have taken it that well when we were younger.” Jason shrugged. “It doesn’t matter as much anymore because I have my own life, finally. And I know that I’d have Zeke on my side if I decided to come out.” “If?” Steve didn’t like the sound of that. But—shit, he wasn’t about to admit he was bisexual. Who gave him the right to demand that Jason come out? Still, it hurt to know that Jason was hesitant to admit they might be more to each other than friends. That was where they were headed, wasn‘t it? “Sure, if.” Jason took Steve’s hand, the one still resting comfortably on his chest, and entwined their fingers again. It seemed he liked that connection as much as Steve did. “Coming out may be easier with my family, or at least parts of it, than it would have been a few years ago. But the rest of my friends, the people at work and my customers might have some issues. So I’m not about to do it unless it’s worth it.” “Got you.” Steve nodded, then he had to laugh when he realised what Jason had just said. “My strategy is actually exactly the same. Only I have no clue how my parents would react, not that it matters much since they don’t exactly live around the corner anymore. I’m more worried about Tim’s reaction and the impact it would have on my job.”

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“Good, I guess we agree. Not that we have to decide anything right this minute.” Jason grinned. “The only thing I’d like to do right now is more kissing.” “Oh yeah?” Steve could go with that plan. He so could. Kissing Jason had so far been a lot more exciting and satisfying on a deep-down level than most of his previous sexual encounters. Not that there had been that many. Neither of his two relationships had lasted more than three months, and he’d never found the kind of connection he already felt with Jason. Maybe there was something about this idea of a soul mate after all? At the very least it now seemed to him as if there were people who were more likely to be good partners than others. Gender, at least for him, was clearly less important than the other person’s character. “Come here.” Jason’s voice was deeper than before and his eyes were half-closed. Steve looked at him. He was a picture of desire and temptation. How could he resist the promise in Jason’s eyes? The beautiful lips that were soft as velvet, yet able to give as good as they got? The tongue that had explored his mouth and had made shivers of arousal chase down his spine when he imagined it on other parts of his body? With a low moan he slid down next to Jason so he lay on his side. He moved his arm around Jason’s waist, turning the other man onto his side as well. The need for top to bottom contact was devastatingly urgent. Too bad they wouldn’t be able to take their clothes off. Even though they were hidden from view, this place was just a little too public for full nudity. The thought alone increased his arousal another few degrees. Their tongues met and stroked alongside each other, making the heat and passion between them rise again. Steve moved closer until his hardening cock bumped into Jason’s equally hard erection. Man, that feels good! “Shit.” Jason pulled back, his eyes big. “Yep, I agree.” Steve breathed deeply, trying to control his need for pressure, friction…anything to relieve the sudden tension. “But in a good way.” Jason laughed out loud. Steve dove back into the kiss, enjoying the feelings that coursed through his body as he caressed Jason’s tongue and explored his mouth. He ground his hips into Jason’s and let his hand travel up the well-muscled back. Jason’s body looked slim and he was lithe, but from

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what Steve detected under the T-shirt there was an underlying strength there as well. One he definitely wanted to examine in a lot more detail. Jason pulled back, panting for breath. “Fuck, this feels good.” Jason swallowed. “You’re going to make me come if we don’t stop.” “Don’t want to stop.” This felt way too good. “Okay. Change of plans, then.” Jason moved his hand between their bodies, fumbling their buttons and zippers open. Steve looked down and almost came anyway. Jason pulled his hard cock out of his briefs before sliding his hands into Steve’s underwear, clearly intent on doing the same. “Hold on.” Steve wanted to look at what they were doing. “Don’t tell me you’ve changed your mind?” Jason looked horrified. “No way.” Was there a man alive who would say no to an orgasm? “But I want to see what’s going on when we do this for the first time. I’ve waited for my first man-on-man sex for too long to make this a rushed affair.” “Oh, man, you’re gonna make us wait, aren’t you?” Jason’s hand withdrew and he rolled away, onto his back as he closed his eyes. “Shit.” “I’m sorry.” Disappointment made Steve’s cock deflate and he also rolled onto his back, closing his pants as he went. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from Jason. The man was hiding a gorgeous body under his clothes. “No, don’t be.” Jason opened his eyes, tucked himself back in and sat up. “You’re right, we should take our time. It’s just that it felt so good and I was so close…” “Same here.” Maybe there was hope? “Would…would you like to continue this in my apartment?” Jason looked so hopeful, Steve would have said yes to anything he asked. “I would like nothing more.” “Okay, let’s go then.” Jason sat up on his knees and started packing the leftovers and empty containers back into the basket he’d brought the food in. “Now?” Steve sat up to help. “Sure, have you got anything better to do?” Jason winked and closed the cooler.

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“Hardly.” Steve laughed and picked up the blanket, folding it before taking hold of the fishing gear. God, this was so easy! “I was surprised we have the same priorities.” “Maybe you shouldn’t be.” Jason led the way back to the car. “After all, we’re both men.” “Good point.” Steve followed Jason. They got everything stowed and were on their way back to Riverside in minutes. As much as he enjoyed driving, his thoughts kept wandering to what they were about to do. Would it be as easy as it had been at the lake? What was going to happen when the haze of arousal was gone and he took off his clothes with full knowledge of what was going to happen? “Don’t worry about it.” Jason moved a hand onto his thigh, squeezing slightly before relaxing and leaving it there for comfort. “We’ll be fine.” I sure hope so!

**** Jason was a lot more nervous than he’d let on. Yes, he wanted to explore Steve’s body. Feeling Steve pressed against him, the very tangible proof of his arousal pressing against Jason’s own erection, had been more exciting than he could have imagined. When he’d finally had their pants unbuttoned, he’d thought he was in heaven. Running his hands along the hot skin as he’d tried to pull Steve’s cock from his underwear had almost made him come. He desperately wanted to find out what it was like to look at and touch Steve’s cock. He’d fantasised about something like this for years. But he was scared as well. What if he didn’t do it right? What if Steve baulked once he saw him naked? What if…? Jason sighed and leaned his head back against the headrest. All he had to do now was wait a little longer and hope for the best. Holding on to Steve’s thigh, feeling his muscles tense and relax as he drove, gave him much needed grounding. “Where do I go?” Steve’s voice interrupted his thoughts.

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“Oh, sorry.” Jason looked around, amazed they were already near the city limits. “Take exit twenty-five, then make a right on to Culver Boulevard. Keep going straight for about five miles, then make a right into Thirty-Third Street and it’ll be the fifth building on our left.” “Got it.” Steve kept going until they’d reached the exit, then followed the directions to their destination. Jason got the leftover food from the trunk, Steve grabbed the cooler and they were on their way. Jason just hoped he hadn’t left his place in too much chaos, but who would have thought he’d bring Steve back with him today? Opening the door of his fourth-floor apartment, he let Steve inside a few minutes later. A quick glance at the living room revealed no embarrassing leftover pizza boxes or empty beer cans. “You want a drink?” Jason pointed at the small kitchen. He wanted to get busy in the bedroom so badly—his cock was still half-hard from earlier. Having Steve right here, with nobody to interrupt them, had him well on the way to fully erect within minutes. “We can drop off the stuff in there then get something from the fridge.” “Sure.” Steve followed him, taking in his surroundings with quick glances. His main attention seemed to be on Jason’s ass. “A soda would be great. Driving is thirsty work.” “You want the grand tour?” Jason got them fresh sodas from the fridge. “Not that there’s that much to see, but I figure you need to know the basic layout.” “Please.” Steve gulped down half the can before looking back at him, his eyes smouldering with lust. “I have some clear priorities, though.” “Oh?” Man, if that didn’t make his cock sit up and take notice. “Yeah.” Steve finished the soda in one more go, put down the can and stepped closer, his gaze never leaving Jason’s. “I want to continue right where we left off.” “S-same here.” He looked up, admiring the warmth in those deep brown eyes. Diving into them to explore Steve’s innermost thoughts would be such an adventure. “After you.” Steve grinned as he stepped aside, making sure their shoulders brushed as Jason walked past him into the small hallway. Jason took the lead, pointing out the living room, his office and the bathroom as they went. Getting to the bedroom had never been this important. He’d never taken anyone there, preferring the anonymity of whatever girl’s apartment was available over his home. Somehow, that made it feel all the more important for this thing with Steve to work out. The

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man was already deeper into his life than anyone outside his family. And most of his relatives, other than Zeke, weren’t all that close either. All thought of family, his apartment and anything else left his head as soon as they stepped into the bedroom. He barely had time to be relieved that he’d actually made the bed that morning before Steve took him into his arms, one hand on his ass, the other behind his neck. He pushed him up against the wall and bent down his head for a kiss that was hotter than anything they’d shared so far. Jason opened to him as his back collided with the wall, welcoming the hot tongue that swept through his mouth. He lifted his hands and ran them up Steve’s arms and his broad shoulders before skimming the soft skin of his neck then burying his fingers in the black curls. He held on for dear life as Steve plundered his mouth. He was so aroused, his hips bucked and he felt Steve’s hard erection through the fabric of their pants. Hadn’t they done this already? With an almost super-human effort he pushed Steve’s head away the few inches needed to catch his breath and be able to speak. “Naked?” God, he was down to one-word expressions already. “Hmm.” Steve’s mouth was back on his for another scorching hot kiss. Jason pulled back again, panting for breath. “Now.” Or he could come in his pants. After all, he was at home this time and the apartment did have a washing machine. “Bossy.” Steve stopped trying to get their mouths to touch. Hot puffs of air escaped Steve’s open mouth, caressing Jason’s skin. Steve grinned and pulled back farther. “I like that.” “Yeah?” Jason focussed on keeping his hips still, but it wasn’t easy. He wanted to keep going and come already. “There’s more where that came from.” Steve laughed and the tension was broken. “I’m sure there is.” Steve stepped back. “But for now we want the same thing, so there’s no need for bossiness.” Jason’s hands slid out of Steve’s hair and he dropped his arms to his sides, trying to regain his balance. Not an easy task when Steve started taking off his T-shirt, revealing

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sculpted abs, a well-muscled chest with the largest brown nipples he’d ever seen on a man, and an almost hairless expanse of skin that just begged to be licked and nibbled on. When the shirt was gone, thrown into a corner, Steve raised his eyebrows and stared at him. Oh, right, it was his turn now. Suddenly he was a little hesitant about undressing in front of this hunk. He took care of himself, even went to the gym on a regular basis now that he had a well-paying job, but he had none of the almost chiselled beauty of Steve’s upper body. A quick glance a little lower confirmed the bulge in the man’s pants was no less impressive. “Hey, look at me.” Steve’s voice was low. Jason looked up. “You are gorgeous. I can’t wait to see more of you.” Steve stepped closer, putting his hands on Jason’s hips and squeezing. “Okay.” He nodded then pulled off his shirt, throwing it behind him. Steve’s low whistle was very rewarding. “Just look at you.” Steve lifted a hand and slid it across Jason’s belly, up towards his chest. “I love how white your skin is. Just look at the contrast between the two of us.” Yeah, that did look exciting. He never knew he had a thing for dark skin, but he was quickly getting there. When Steve’s fingers circled his nipple, he took a deep breath. Steve caressed the quickly hardening bud, and Jason moaned. There seemed to be a direct connection between his nipple and his cock. Who knew? Steve’s hand travelled to his other nipple, circling and caressing it, and he moaned his delight. “Oh God, that feels incredible.” Jason closed his eyes for a moment. Steve chuckled and moved away. Jason’s eyes flew open. “We’ll get back to that, I promise.” Steve smiled. “But I really think we should try and get naked first, or we’ll never get there. You are just too distracting.” “I am?” Jason was kind of happy about that. Knowing that Steve was as attracted to him as he was to the beautiful new man in his life was very reassuring. Steve took his hand and put it firmly onto the now very prominent bulge between his legs.

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“Can you feel what you’re doing to me?” Steve’s hips pushed into Jason’s hand. “Man!” Jason decided a change in tactics was needed. “Okay, let’s focus on getting naked first, then we can explore, okay?” “Yes.” Steve stepped back, turning his body away from Jason. The side view was almost as good as the frontal, but Jason forced himself to turn away and deal with his clothes. When he was done, his cock stuck out from his body and was so hard it was almost painful. He turned around and, for the first time in his life, looked at a man with an erection who wasn’t onscreen in some porn flick. No words were needed. He took Steve by the upper arms and moved him towards the bed. Steve smiled as Jason pushed him onto his back then scooted between his legs, never looking away from the dark shaft that looked just as hard as his own. He reached out to touch the beautiful penis. Running a finger around the tip made Steve hiss. When he closed his fist around the pulsing shaft, Steve fisted the blankets. Rubbing that spot just underneath the head that was so sensitive for him made Steve moan and buck his hips. Jason tightened his grip and watched as Steve started fucking his fist, fascinated by the novelty of someone else’s soft skin against his palm. He lifted his other hand to cradle the heavy balls and Steve started shaking. “Fuck!” Steve’s thrusts became more powerful. Seconds later his back arched and jets of white semen erupted from the tip of his cock as his entire body trembled. Jason softly squeezed his balls and milked the shaft until nothing was left. Steve flopped back onto the bed with a grunt. His own arousal momentarily forgotten, Jason watched as Steve’s face relaxed and his lover started grinning. “Wow.” Steve’s chest heaved as he recovered. “Got anything to clean this up? And then it’ll be your turn.” “Please.” He was ready to explode as he bent towards the nightstand to extract some tissues for Steve. As soon as he was done Steve sat up and reached for Jason’s cock. His hand hadn’t quite closed around the stiff erection when Jason pushed into it with all his might. Steve’s grip tightened and he started jacking him off. It only made the inevitable outcome even more intense. Seconds later Jason’s hands shot forwards to hold on to Steve’s shoulders as he

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released his load, covering Steve in more spunk. The pleasure coursing through him was the best he’d ever felt. Steve cleaned him up then reclined on the bed before pulling Jason into his arms. “I would say that was a success.” Steve sounded exhausted but very amused. “Absolutely.” Jason yawned, ready for a nap. “Could just be beginner’s luck, though.” “Beginner’s luck? Are you joking?” Steve’s eyebrows rose towards his hairline. “We’d have to try it again to see if this was an exception.” Jason grinned. He’d always been good at finding excuses for just about anything. “Ah, I see what you mean.” Steve chuckled and tightened his embrace. “Nap first, though, okay?” Jason nodded and snuggled closer. His orgasm had been fantastic. Having a hard body to cuddle against was nicer than he’d ever imagined. And the fact they both agreed on the need for a nap was icing on the cake.

**** Riverside, Texas Monday August 25, 2008 Jason had never had such a hard time returning to the real world as today. In recent months, as his performance as a salesman had improved, Monday mornings had become a time of excitement. Not only had he been keen to start a new work week, with the previous week’s sales statistics being available, there was also always sure to be some extra excitement. A friendly amount of ribbing of colleagues who didn’t do so well and some grudging admiration of those who had risen to the top of the heap that week. The weekend with Steve had been amazing. The fishing alone had been more fun than he’d had with a buddy in ages. And the sex? Shit, that had been spectacular. They’d stuck to kissing and hand jobs, mutual and otherwise, on Saturday. Steve had even decided to stay the night, and waking up beside another man with morning wood had been an experience. Jason grinned as he sipped his coffee. He’d come in extra early to check the numbers in peace and prepare for any possible discussions or comments from Tim and his colleagues.

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But as he stood there, staring at the pinned-up sales reports, his attention wasn’t on the printouts for once, but firmly back in his bedroom. When he’d turned towards Steve and their hard cocks had touched, there’d been no stopping them. Frottage had always seemed a somewhat strange activity to him in theory, but feeling Steve rub up against him, experiencing the friction of cock and balls against his own, had been exhilarating. With enough pre-cum between them to make the sliding smooth, they hadn’t been able to stop until they’d both come so hard they’d shaken with it. The rest of the day had passed much too quickly, but at least they’d agreed to see each other on at least one evening this week. He’d hated seeing Steve leave for his own apartment on Sunday night. He hadn’t slept all that well alone. “Hey, what’s wrong with you?” The voice was overly loud and made him jump. He turned around to see who seemed to have a problem with him. Leo. The man seemed to constantly follow him around. That Saturday when Steve had bought his car had only been one example of many in the last few months when Jason had been sure Leo was trying to steal his customers. He shook his head. If the guy spent more time understanding the people who wanted to buy cars and the cars themselves, he might be more successful. Scare tactics and blustering might have worked ten years ago when Leo was a star salesman. But they sure didn’t convince anyone now. “I asked you a question.” Leo frowned. “Or are you too important to talk to me now?” “I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you. I was looking at the sales numbers.” What the hell was wrong with the guy? “Yeah, right. More like admiring your own success.” Leo fisted his hands. “How do you do it? That’s what I want to know.” “Do what?” He had an idea of what Leo meant, but playing dumb might avoid the confrontation Leo seemed to be looking for. “You know what!” Leo’s voice rose. “It can’t be right that you sell more cars than I do. I have a lot more experience, and customers can relate to that. No, I think something fishy is going on. You have some sort of scheme going or something.” “You can’t be serious. “ A scheme to sell more cars? Give me a break!

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“There is no other way.” Leo’s upper lip pulled up, making him look even uglier than usual. “But I’m going to find out what it is and expose your cheating ways. That’ll teach you.” “Look, I just do my job as best I can. There is no cheating and I don’t use tricks.” He wasn’t going to let this idiot ruin his good mood. “We’ll see about that.” Leo grinned. “I’ll be watching you very closely from now on. You have been warned.” What the fuck?

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Chapter Three

Riverside, Texas Tuesday August 26, 2008 “Ready to have a drink with us after work?” Hank’s question practically rumbled from the big man’s chest. It was loud enough to pull Steve from his memories of the weekend. He wished, not for the first time, that his co-worker came with a button to turn down the volume. Everything about Hank was big, strong, or loud. Including his opinions on anything up for discussion, be it politics, the weather, cars, or appropriate ways to spend one’s free time. Of course, Hank was always right and had to have the last word as well. “Not sure yet.” He was still hoping for a quick get-together with Jason. It had only been two days since he’d left the man’s apartment but it had felt like weeks. He wanted to see him again. Hell, he wanted a lot more than that. “What’s wrong with you?” Hank turned his massive body towards him, making the cleaning platform they were perched on wobble. They were ten floors above the safety of solid ground, washing the windows of an architectural firm’s office, and Steve wasn’t happy to have been paired with the much heavier man. He’d never admit it, but high rises like this weren’t his thing, and being stuck on an unstable platform with someone known for his volatile temper didn’t exactly make him feel safe. “Why do you think there’s anything wrong with me?” Steve continued swiping the cleaning fluid off the windowpane, making sure the extra dripped from his T-bar straight into the small bucket on his belt after each pull. “Having a drink with the boys should be a no-brainer.” Hank had stopped working, his beady eyes now fixed on Steve. “Unless you’ve got something better to do?” “I’m waiting to hear from a friend.” Steve just wanted to finish the job and get off this damned platform. “And this ‘friend’ is better than we are?” Hank frowned.

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“Not better, just…” He wasn’t about to tell Hank that Jason was the best company he’d had in years. If Hank got wind of his already considerable attachment to Jason, Steve’s life at work would be hell. There’d been enough homophobic comments over the seven months he’d worked for Crystal Clear for him to know he’d be in deep trouble if they ever found out he was interested in men. Bisexuality wasn’t a concept that was understood by far more open minded people than this particular group of macho window washers. “Yeah, right.” Hank snorted, his lips curling in contempt. “I always thought you were a bit odd, keeping yourself apart like that. But I told the other guys they were wrong and to give you a chance. Looks like they’ll be the ones to have the last laugh after all.” Oh hell, now he’d done it. An angry Hank was not a good thing. The man was not only opinionated, but extremely vindictive towards people who made him look bad. “Or is there something else going on?” Hank narrowed his eyes. Steve shrugged, trying not to think about Jason. He just knew his feelings would show in his face if he did. “There is!” Hank sounded triumphant as he slapped the platform’s rail. Steve held on to it for dear life, hoping to hell that the safety lines would hold should the platform tilt too far. “I bet you have a new girlfriend.” Hank grinned and slapped him on the back with enough force to make him lurch forwards. “Can’t wait to meet her.” Steve just shook his head. He’d never introduced a girlfriend to these guys, and wouldn’t want to even if he had one. They were enough to scare off Attila the Hun, much less a woman in a new relationship. The fact that Jason might one day become his boyfriend was not something he was willing to share with them. Shit. He already thought of the man as a potential boyfriend. He’d only known him for less than two weeks. He almost slapped his forehead with the stupidity of it. What was he thinking? No way could these guys find out he was contemplating a relationship with a man. They’d probably never talk to him again, if not worse. “No reason to shake your head, kid.” Hank’s grin widened, making his entire face crinkle. “I’ve been there. Not ready to admit I was already in a relationship, but everyone else knew. You’ll get there and I look forward to finding out what she’s like.”

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“No, you don’t understand. I really don’t have a girlfriend.” Steve wanted to say more but thought better of it. The less he said, the less Hank knew…and the smaller the risk he’d find out the truth. “We’ll see.” Hank reached for the pulley to move them to the next window. Yeah, well, that was exactly what Steve was afraid of. There was plenty of time for thinking while washing windows, and he did a lot of that over the final two hours of the work day. Having to hide the fact that he was going out with a man, because that was certainly what spending time with Jason felt like, didn’t sit well with him. He was a private guy, but keeping secrets like that was another matter. He wasn’t even sure if Jason was out, but based on the fact he’d said that he’d never been interested in a man, he probably wasn’t. Steve wasn’t about to announce his sexuality either, so what was going to happen when they started spending more time together? Being buddies would only get them so far. Damn. This situation was a lot more complicated than he was ready for.

**** Riverside, Texas Saturday August 30, 2008 “Penny for your thoughts.” Jason lowered the stick he’d been using to turn their steaks in the tin pan before wiping his hands on the dish cloth he’d stuffed into his belt. Steve looked at him for a few more seconds before shrugging. He wasn’t sure what was going to happen between them and he certainly didn’t want to ruin their Saturday afternoon with heavy thoughts. They’d hiked into the wilderness area north of the city, bringing their own food for an improvised barbeque. Sitting in the shade and watching Jason prepare their meal gave him the opportunity to ogle the other man. Jason had taken his T-shirt off and his toned chest with small pink nipples made Steve’s mouth water. His blond hair shone in the occasional ray of sunshine breaking through the leaves overhead, and the easy way he moved as he prepared their food was almost graceful. Steve could have watched him forever.

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“You don’t want to talk about it?” Jason sat back and relaxed. “I’m not sure there’s anything concrete to talk about.” He sighed. He tended to worry too much, and wondering about the effects of a long-term relationship on his life when he’d known Jason for two weeks was probably an overreaction. He remembered the conversation he’d had with Hank. The ribbing he’d got when he told the group he wasn’t going to join their afternoon of bowling on Saturday had been no worse than usual. It was his apprehension that had made it seem like an issue. But how was he going to tell Jason? Should he even bring this up? “Look, there’s obviously something bothering you.” Jason tilted his head. “But if you’re not ready to talk about it that’s fine. We haven’t known each other that long, so we don’t need to share everything.” ”That’s exactly it.” He leant back against the tree trunk behind him and stretched out his legs. “We’ve been seeing a lot of each other and do pretty well together, don’t you think?” “Yeah, I would say so.” Jason nodded. “But what about when we’re around other people?” He couldn’t believe how stupid this sounded when he said it out loud. But he’d started it, so he’d better finish it or Jason would never leave him alone. “What do you mean?” Jason looked puzzled. “We’ve been out to dinner a couple of times, seen that action movie the other day. We were around people then, weren’t we?” “Yes, I guess we were.” He chuckled. “That’s not quite what I meant, though. This is going to sound odd, but it was something my co-worker said the other day about girlfriends.” “Girlfriends?” Jason’s eyebrows rose to his hairline. “Why the hell are we discussing girlfriends?” “We aren’t, don’t worry. No, it was what he said about introducing my new girlfriend to the buddies at work. Not that I have one, but Hank didn’t know that. He just noticed that I’d spent a lot more time away from them recently and I guess to him that means I must have a girlfriend.” He cleared his throat. “It made me wonder how we’ll deal with others seeing us together, you know?”

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“Others seeing us together?” Jason stepped forwards, clearly interested now. “I assume you mean as more than buddies, because that surely wouldn’t cause any problems, would it? So are you talking about us being a couple?” “I guess.” He could feel the colour rise in his cheeks, sure now he’d read more into the situation than was warranted. “Oh, that’s just adorable.” Jason’s eyes crinkled as a grin spread across his face. “Adorable?” That wasn’t quite the response he’d been looking for. “Just the fact that you’re blushing about this.” Jason shook himself and turned serious. “I’ve actually been wondering the same thing. I mean, I may have never dated a man before, but I don’t have a problem coming out and saying so. After all, I’ve always known that I’m gay. There’ll be a few people who will be confused, but I think that’s their problem more than mine. My real question about this is where you want to take it?” “Hmm.” That wasn’t what he’d been hoping to hear either. Well, not quite. At least Jason hadn’t run screaming into the hills when he’d mentioned them being a couple. “‘Hmm’ isn’t a real response.” Jason laughed, but it sounded forced. “Do you really think that the people you work with and your friends wouldn’t mind that you’re suddenly gay? Because that’s what it will look like to them.” He wished that was the case with his co-workers. He didn’t really have friends, so he didn’t need to worry about that part. “I’m sure that some of them would mind. What I’m saying is that I won’t care because what they think doesn’t matter to me. I might have been concerned about what my boss would think, but I know that Tim would be okay with us. After all, he’s been friends with my brother Ben for years, and he didn’t even bat an eyelash when Ben and Zeke got together a few months ago.” Jason looked at him, the question clear in his eyes even before he spoke. “So, are we a couple?” Steve couldn’t do anything but nod. Deep down he’d known that they were a couple, even if he hadn’t admitted it to himself until just now. More importantly, he actually wanted them to be a couple. Even though he’d only known Jason for such a short time, there was just something about them spending time together that had clicked. He just wished he knew how to deal with other people’s reactions.

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“It’s different for you, isn’t it?” Jason looked thoughtful as he moved forwards to check on their food. “Very different.” Steve had rarely been as sure about anything as he was about predicting the animosity and derision he would face if the people he worked with found out he was gay. The fact that he was actually bisexual would possibly make things even worse. For the people who saw the world in black or white, grey was a very uncomfortable concept. “So, what you’re saying is that you’re going to have to hide our relationship?” Jason was clearly trying to be objective about this. “I didn’t even realise that we have a relationship until we started this discussion. I thought about it, yes, but it’s only just now dawned on me that this is heading in a totally unexpected direction.” And wasn’t that an uncomfortable admission to have to make. The disappointment on Jason’s face almost crushed him. “I’m not saying I don’t like being more than a friend to you. On the contrary, I like that a lot. But I’m not sure that anyone needs to know how much more we mean to each other. Not at this early stage anyway.” Steve wanted to wait and see how permanent this really was before he did anything irrevocable. “Okay.” Jason nodded, but he didn’t look happy. “Just give me some time, please, okay?” He’d trusted too easily before, and he wasn’t going to repeat that mistake, no matter how tempted he was. “Sure.” Jason took a deep breath and managed a real smile. “Come here.” Steve opened his arms. “The meat and potatoes look like they’ll take a while longer, and I think we have better things to do than talking about things that haven’t even happened yet.” “You do, huh?” Jason got on hands and knees and crawled towards him, moving like a big jungle cat. God, that was sexy. “I sure do.” He took Jason’s face between his hands as soon as the other man was within reach. Jason crawled across his legs, straddling his thighs and sitting squarely in his lap before leaning into him. He brought his arms around Steve’s waist and held on. Steve pulled his face even closer and brushed his mouth across the tempting pink lips offered up to him. With

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a moan, his lover opened up. Their tongues met and tangled in a game of hide and seek that was more about staying in touch as much as possible, than about hiding. Steve slid one hand behind Jason’s neck and the other around his shoulders so he could stroke his back. Slowly moving downwards, he made them both moan when he finally reached the tight ass and squeezed a cheek through the fabric of his shorts. Jason’s hips bucked as he groaned. That motion increased the pressure on Steve’s groin enough for him to decide they needed to take the edge off. Even though their little clearing was very secluded and they hadn’t seen more than five other people on the way here, they were still out in the open. They needed to be careful and quick about this, but he wasn’t going to deny himself or his lover the fun of a quick orgasm in the fresh air. Steve moved his hand between their bodies, opening buttons and zippers, never letting up on the kissing. Jason made soft little sounds at the back of his throat as Steve pulled first his own then Jason’s cock out of their underwear. Holding both in his large fist, he gave them a tight tunnel to thrust into. The friction of cock on cock combined with hot kisses quickly drove him the rest of the way to the edge. He came with a grunt, spraying hot spunk all over his hand. Jason wasn’t far behind. Throwing his head back, he came with eyes closed tightly and a low moan that sounded like music to Steve’s ears. His lover fell forwards, burying his face in Steve’s neck. When they’d both caught their breath, Jason pulled back and opened his eyes. Sated was definitely a very good look on Steve.

**** Riverside, Texas Monday September 1, 2008 On his way to work, Jason tried, yet again, to put his worries about Steve’s attitude towards their relationship into perspective. Mentally ticking off the arguments, he used the time at a red traffic light to focus on the key points.

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They’d known each other for only two weeks. He felt very strongly about Steve already and suspected he was going to fall for his rugged charm in a major way. However, that didn’t mean Steve was in the same position. He was ready to make a public commitment to Steve. He’d be proud to call him his boyfriend and wanted the world to know as well. But then, he didn’t have any fears about not being accepted for being gay. He knew Tim was going to be fine with it, and with his boss to support him, any colleagues who might have an issue would fall into place. Hiding their relationship didn’t sit well with him at all. He sighed as he turned the car into its spot on the parking lot. Patience had never been his strength, and it looked as if it was going to be sorely tested over the next few weeks while Steve decided what he wanted to do. His car was the second one on the lot—only Tim had made it even earlier than he had. Hurrying into the office, he found the stack of monthly sales reports on the secretary’s desk and grabbed them. He loved getting hold of them first, so he could get his reports done as soon as possible. He poured a coffee then took everything into his tiny office, settling in to check how everyone had done. “I told you to stop cheating!” “What?” Jason’s head snapped up from his paperwork. So far, it had all been good news as far as he was concerned. Other salespeople, not so much. The recession was hitting everyone hard, but some of his colleagues seemed to adapt more easily than others. After all, used cars as a whole had become a lot more attractive for many families now facing tighter budgets. Selling them was a lot easier than trying to sell new cars. “You heard me.” Leo stood in the door, with his lips pursed in disapproval and a furrowed forehead. His dark hair looked even slicker than normal and the light green shirt made him look too pale to be considered healthy. “What are you talking about?” Jason gripped his pen more tightly in an attempt not to give away how unsettled he felt at Leo suddenly attacking him like this. “I told you last week that I want you to stop cheating to get to be the best salesperson of the month every single time.” Leo’s voice carried a deep tone of conviction and his facial expression turned from haughty to determined.

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“I’m sorry, but I can’t say I took that seriously.” Was this what it came back to? He’d almost forgotten Leo’s threat about watching him. But this demand to change what he was doing went too far, even for a self-centred and slightly crazy person like Leo. “Oh, I can assure you, I was more than serious.” Leo stepped inside the room, making it seem smaller somehow. “That is very disappointing. I guess I’ll have to use a different approach to make sure you take me seriously.” Leo grinned, but there was no friendliness in the gesture. Jason raised his eyebrows when the pushy man closed the door to his tiny office and slowly approached his desk. Sitting down on the edge of it in a move that presumed a lot more familiarity than there existed between them, Leo gave another patently false smile that almost made Jason cringe. Only his decision to show no weakness and his need to find out what the hell was going on kept him from yelling at his slimy colleague to get the hell out of his office. “I’ll tell you how this is going to play out. You’ll stop cheating so that honest people like me have a chance to get the monthly title and awards.” Leo narrowed his eyes, bending slightly forwards. “If you don’t, I’ll tell everyone about your boyfriend.” “What boyfriend are you talking about?” Jason held his breath. Thinking about coming out and actually doing it, especially facing someone whose attitude towards gays he wasn’t entirely sure of, were proving to be two very different things. “Oh, you have more than one?” Leo’s smile turned sardonic. “Naughty, naughty!” Jason’s mouth almost dropped open. What the hell was going on with Leo? His best policy was probably silence, to see where the man was going with this before he said something that could be used against him. Leo had always been jealous of his success, constantly trying to torpedo Jason’s ideas for change, and their rivalry for the salesman of the month title was legendary. One way or another, he was sure Leo would bring this back to the business side of things. How, he had no idea. “Cat got your tongue, Jase?” Leo waggled his eyebrows. He made sure he didn’t move a muscle, not wanting to remind Leo he really hated being called Jase. His name was Jason, damn it. He’d made the mistake of telling Leo once, and the slime ball had used every opportunity to bait him with it since.

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“So, about this boyfriend of yours.” Leo picked up a paperclip and pulled it apart in slow, careful motions. If he was going to use it to clean his nails again, Jason was going to scream. “I still don’t know what you mean, or what you think you saw.” He was relieved to see that Leo had turned his attention away from the now straight piece of metal. “There was no thinking about what I saw involved. I saw you with him, so there is no point in denying it.” Leo lowered his eyebrows, probably trying to look threatening. It didn’t work. “Where?” He needed to know what it was Leo thought he’d seen if he wanted to do damage control. Was it worth even trying? Hadn’t he just considered coming out anyway? “I saw you in the movie theatre.” Leo looked triumphant. “Oh.” They hadn’t even come close to doing anything that could have made Leo suspicious, he was pretty sure. “Let me tell you something, Leo. Steve and I are just buddies, nothing else.” “You kiss all your buddies?” Leo tilted his head, still playing with the paper clip. “Kiss?” They hadn’t even come close to touching that day, not in public. What had happened in his apartment afterwards was an entirely different matter. “Don’t play me for a fool, I saw you making eyes at him that day in the movie theatre. I won’t even mention what I saw in the wilderness area parking lot on the weekend.” Leo leant back looking proud of himself. “You are most definitely gay.” Shit. He’d looked around to check if anybody was there before he’d given Steve that quick peck on the lips. Apparently, he hadn’t been very thorough. Okay. Only one way to go now. His grandfather had always said that offence was the best defence. “So what?” Jason leant back in his chair, forcing himself to look relaxed. Maybe bluffing would get this idiot off his back. He was going to come out sooner or later, but he’d rather do it on his terms and timing of his choosing. Steve hadn’t sounded as if he was ready to let the world know about his relationship with Jason, so giving him some more time to come to terms with the situation might help. And why else would he come out? He’d always said he’d only do it if he was in a relationship with another man. Doing it just to be honest wasn’t enough reason for him. The risk of being rejected, at work and elsewhere, was very real. After all, this was Riverside, Texas, not New York City or San Francisco.

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“Do you really think that anyone will still want to work with you if they know you’re gay?” Leo raised his eyebrows. “Some of them may not but that’s their problem.” He was pretty sure any hard-core bigots would have left when they’d found out that one of Tim’s best friends, a well-known police detective, was now living with another man. “Well, I wouldn’t be so sure if I was you.” Leo sat up straight, puffing up his chest in the most ridiculous way. Had he been a peacock, his feathers would have been at full display. “Tim doesn’t like confrontation amongst his employees. He’s said so often enough. Once our co-workers start making objections or tell him that they won’t work with you anymore, I’m pretty sure that Tim will make it your problem soon enough.” “And I’m just as sure he won’t mind one bit.” He grinned just to see Leo turn angry. The man was insufferable when he thought he had the upper hand. “You’re right, he might object to the fighting, if there is any, but I’m equally sure that he will defend my right to keep my sexual orientation personal and not make it an issue at work. If anything, he will remind anyone who says they have a problem that they can always go and find a job elsewhere.” “So you’re ready to tell everyone that you have a boyfriend? More importantly, that he is the brother of the man who is our boss?” Leo barked out a short laugh. “Forgive me, but I have my doubts.” “I wasn’t going to tell everyone, no.” “But I will.” Leo nodded, as if his intentions needed confirmation. “So you think blackmail is the way to improve your job performance?” He was very tempted to tell the man to forget it, but he wanted to find out more about what Leo might be planning. Best to keep him talking. “I wouldn’t call it blackmail, exactly.” Leo stared at the little circle he’d made with the thin metal strip before he looked back up. “I’m trying to give you an incentive to back down and stop using whatever tricks you have up your sleeve to make me look bad.” “Make you look bad? Is that what you think I’m doing?” As if he had nothing better to do. He was trying to make a living, that was all. That he had discovered that he was a pretty good salesman was nice, especially since he’d had never had any particular talents before. Not like his brilliant elder brothers.

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“Well, you’re not doing it because you have talent or experience, nobody as young as you can possibly have either.” Leo tossed the remains of the paper clip onto Jason’s desk. “Oh my God.” He sat back and closed his eyes for a moment, hoping to find out this was a bad dream. When he forced them back open Leo was still there. “There’s no point in calling God into this.” Leo looked indignant. “This is about doing the right thing.” “And the right thing, according to you, is me not selling people the cars they obviously need and want.” Jason shook his head. Unbelievable. The man was more delusional than he’d feared. “Nonsense. We’re not here to help people, we are trying to sell as many expensive cars as we can. This is a business. We’re all trying to make a living, and I’m sure that anybody who walks in here as a potential customer can take care of themselves.” Leo was about to grab another paper clip but withdrew his hand at the last moment. “You really believe that, don’t you?” Jason was horrified by the world view that was behind thinking like that. Survival of the most commercially aware was not something he could personally get behind. “Of course!” Leo stood up, as if trying to put some distance between himself and someone who obviously didn’t share his view of the world. “So, for the last time, are you going to stop cheating or not?” “Since I’m not cheating, I can’t stop doing it.” Never mind the consequences, he would deal with them as and when they happened. As far as his situation went, they wouldn’t even be that bad. The one thing he was a little worried about was what might happen to Steve. But he wasn’t going to let Leo know he was worried in the least—the man would take immediate advantage of that, he was sure. “I warn you, I will tell everyone that you’re gay.” Leo’s stance had changed, his hands now fisted and his face turning red. “Go ahead, knock yourself out.” Jason sat back in his chair, making sure he looked as relaxed as possible. Coming out may not have been what he wanted to do, as much for Steve’s sake as his own, but he wasn’t going to let Leo blackmail him, either. “This is not a joke!” Leo’s face turned red, his lips curling in anger.

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“I’m sure it isn’t.” Jason almost laughed at how ridiculous Leo looked like this, all puffed up with nowhere to go. What was this idiot going to come up with next? “I’m not just going to give up.” Leo’s smirk was strained as his hands remained fisted. “Oh, please.” Jason plastered a smile of his own onto his face, hoping to make Leo mad enough that he would leave and let him get back to work. “I have ways of making your life here pretty uncomfortable.” Leo rubbed his hands together. “If you want me to be impressed, you’re going to have to be a lot more specific than that. Empty threats don’t work so well.” He took a deep breath. “Look, we’ve been over this. I will not back down to purposely sell fewer cars than you. I don’t care if you out me, so your little scheme for blackmail isn’t going to work. And now I want you to leave, please.” “You will regret this.” Leo straightened up and stepped back from the desk. Jason pointed to the door, not willing to waste more time or effort on making his position clear to Leo. “This isn’t the end of the matter.” Leo walked to the door and opened it. Turning around one last time, he gave his parting shot. “Just remember, I came here to give you a fair chance. I can’t help it if you’re too stupid to take advantage of it.” “Get out!” Jason almost rose from his seat but he forced himself to stay put. Losing his temper in front of this guy was not going to help. He needed to look calm and collected. When Leo had finally gone, Jason sank back in his chair. He had nothing to be afraid of. The only real threat was Leo outing Steve at work, but it hadn’t sounded as if he’d figured out that that was the one weak point in Jason’s position. His brother might be surprised, but he’d come around pretty quickly. Wouldn’t he?

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Chapter Four

“Where’s Blaine?” Steve stared at the job sheet with this week’s customers and addresses. He’d come to the office like every Monday morning to pick up this week’s assignments. The sheet should contain the man or men he was supposed to work with. But that column was curiously empty. He’d expected to be working with Blaine, one of his favourite coworkers. An ugly sounding laugh made him look up. Hank and Ed stood a few feet away, their own job sheets in hand. They were snickering. “What?” It looked as if they knew more than he did. “You didn’t know?” Hank raised his eyebrows. “Know what?” He was fast losing patience. The jobs on his list were too big to be done by one person, so he definitely needed a partner. Clearly, there was some sort of mistake and he’d have to go and see the administrative assistant to find out what was going on. And she was not his favourite person since she always managed to make him feel extremely stupid. “He got fired.” Ed, an older man about a foot shorter than Hank and a lot less muscular, exchanged one of those he-knows-less-than-we-do glances with Hank. “Hadn’t you heard?” “No.” How was he supposed to have found out? He’d been on a huge job last Thursday and Friday, so the news had passed him by. “It was about time, too.” Hank scratched his belly. “Why? What did he do?” Steve had a very bad feeling about this. Blaine was more softspoken than most of Steve’s co-workers and had always been nice to everyone, but had been on the receiving end of a lot of ribbing about his slight frame and love of classical music. “Well, he didn’t do anything specific, thank God. But we were all afraid he would, one of these days.” Ed looked very uncomfortable. “Do what?” This was stupid. Blaine wouldn’t harm a fly. “You know…” Hank looked at his feet, clearly embarrassed.

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“No, actually I don’t.” Steve was about to turn around to go to the admin office. Surely they’d be able to tell him what had happened. “You mean you never felt him look at you like that?” Hank looked up, his eyes wide. “You’ve never wondered why he doesn’t have a girlfriend?” “Huh?” Steve was ready to shake the man. “He was a fag, man! Disgusting little piece of shit.” Hank drew himself up to his full height. “I can’t believe you didn’t notice.” “N-no, I didn’t.” Shit. Steve didn’t like where this seemed to be going. He didn’t even want to think about what it might mean if he was ever found out. “Well, we did.” Ed grinned. “So we told our boss what was going on and stood up for our rights.” “Hold on. You told Vance you thought the man is gay? And that got him fired?” Steve wanted a hole in the ground to open up and swallow him. Right now. This was wrong on so many levels, he didn’t even know where to start. Firing someone for being gay wasn’t even legal. Basing it on nothing more than an accusation was just wrong. And to do it to someone who was as nice as Blaine, always ready to help? Steve felt nauseous. “Yeah, sure we told him. We have a right to work in decent conditions. I mean, can you imagine having to work with him, just the two of you, and then he comes on to you or worse?” Hank did an exaggerated shudder. “I don’t even want to think about it, makes me sick to my stomach.” Steve could only stare at the others. If he opened his mouth now, he’d say something he couldn’t take back. And he wasn’t sure that he was ready to put his job in jeopardy. Losing his job in this economy wasn’t something he could afford. It made him a coward, but he just couldn’t do it. It had been hard enough to make his own way without a college degree and no talent for anything he’d been able to discover. Working for Tim and the dealership might have given him a secure job and Tim had offered, but he’d always refused to consider taking handouts. “You’re suspiciously quiet. Do you have a problem with this?” Hank narrowed his eyes. “Aren’t you relieved we got Blaine’s sorry ass fired before he had a chance to attack us?” “Attack us?” Where did these guys get their ideas? “Look, I don’t think he would have attacked us—”

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“And how do you know?” Ed stepped forwards. “Were you friends with him or something?” “No, I wasn’t.” And looking back now, he was very sorry he hadn’t been friendlier. He’d always liked Blaine, and whether he was gay or not, he should have had someone to defend him from being fired without a reason. “Well, good. We don’t want the likes of them around, and we don’t want people who think it’s okay to sin against God’s will, either.” Hank nodded as if to confirm his words. “Right. Well, I’ve got to go find out who I’ll be working with this week. See you guys later.” Steve couldn’t get out of there fast enough. He almost ran the entire way to admin, only to find out he’d been given a temporary hire to train. Great!

**** Sharpstown, Texas Saturday September 6, 2008 Even on his way to their destination, sitting in Jason’s car this time, Steve still couldn’t believe he’d agreed to this. It had sounded like fun at the time, and he’d been curious, but was it wise? No way. It was naughty and maybe a little risky. He’d also been way too curious to see one of these places from the inside, so he’d agreed to go with Jason. Better than going alone any day. At least Jason would be able to protect him from unwanted advances. At least Steve hoped so. “Are you as excited about this as I am?” Jason turned off the freeway. “Probably more.” Steve chuckled, trying to keep his nerves from taking over. “But I’m not sure it’s in a good way.” “You’re not?” Jason pulled into the hotel’s parking lot, found a space and killed the engine after parking the car. “You should have said something! I don’t want to force you to do anything you’re not ready for.” Steve looked out of the window and across the street from the hotel’s parking lot. There it was. The very first gay club he was planning to walk into. The Retro Bar looked very

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nondescript from the outside. Located inside a brick building that used to be a warehouse, it was sure to be an interesting place for its architecture as well as its customers. A short line of men of all ages and descriptions led up to the door. They were all dressed well but apparently needed to pass muster with the huge guy next to the front door. Steve watched as the bouncer let some of them in and rejected others. Jeez, what if the guy didn’t accept them as suitable customers for some reason? They’d driven almost an hour to make it to the outskirts of Houston, hoping for some anonymity. At the very least they wouldn’t run into any of his homophobic co-workers, and most likely not into anyone else he knew. And if they did? They’d have as much to hide as he and Jason. That thought made him grin and he returned his attention to his partner in this adventure. “You’re not exactly forcing me.” He laughed, but it sounded hollow, even to him. “I just realised how real it’s suddenly become.” “Okay, as long as you’re sure?” Jason pulled the keys from the ignition and put his hand on Steve’s thigh. “I’ll drive us back at any point.” “Thanks, but I want to do this. I’ll never get my courage up again if we don’t go through with it now.” He took Jason’s hand and squeezed. “Let’s get this show on the road.” They got their overnight bags from the trunk then Steve followed Jason into the hotel reception. The clerk, a young man with floppy hair and a cute grin, didn’t bat an eyelash when he checked them in. They found their room on the fourth floor, dropped their bags, got changed then made their way across the street. This way they wouldn’t have to watch what they were drinking. Driving back to Riverside after what might be a long evening hadn’t seemed like a good idea, either. And honestly? He was sort of counting on the idea that seeing a bunch of hopefully good-looking guys dance would get them hot and inspired enough to do a little more than a hand job tonight. He wasn’t sure about sucking Jason off, but he wanted to try. He wanted him to reciprocate as well. Just thinking about it had him half hard in his tight pants already. They passed the bouncer without incident and walked inside. Muted sounds came from a thick door straight ahead, the rhythm that of dance music. The room they found themselves in was fairly big, with a bar on the right and some comfortable leather chairs and a wardrobe area on the left. They paid the cover charge to a cute guy who also took their jackets then

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were pointed towards the bar to pick up their one complimentary drink. He went with tonic water because he wanted a clear head for this, and Jason followed his example. They glanced at each other before walking through what was clearly the entrance to the club itself. The noise hit them as soon as they opened the door. The music was loud enough to cover anything other than loud shouting. The lighting was dim but several spotlights illuminated the dance floor in all colours of the rainbow. It teemed with bare-chested men who were dancing in various stages of intimacy, from simple swaying to the music, to kissing, to humping each other right there for anyone to see. The smell of alcohol and male sweat was a heady perfume and, when Jason took his hand to pull him to one of the little tables on the left, he managed to tear his gaze away from the spectacle to watch where he was going. It wasn’t easy. His arousal had gone up at the view and feeling Jason’s hand in his in public like this was more exciting than he’d have thought possible. He’d never been one for public displays, but somehow this was different. Not feeling safe enough to touch his lover in public under normal circumstances, even in the smallest way, made doing so now more special. Jason didn’t let go of his hand even after they’d sat down. Steve decided he could get used to that as he finished his drink and watched the goings-on. Most of the men wore leather pants, a few of them had kept their T-shirts or mesh tops on, and all of them seemed to be having the time of their lives. As he expanded his visual inspection outwards from the dance floor, he noticed several couples plastered up against the back wall. His eyes widened. Their activities definitely weren’t limited to kissing. “You want to dance?” Jason’s mouth was close to his ear and the sudden question made him jump. He grinned back at Jason and nodded. At first it was weird to hold his lover in his arms like this—in public. When Jason’s hands came around his neck, sliding across the sensitive skin at his nape, he stopped watching the other couples. Jason stepped right up to him, and he felt a hard erection pressing against his own. The music took over, and they moved as one with their hips grinding into each other and their chests touching.

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It was intoxicating. At this rate, he’d need to do something about his rising arousal pretty soon or face the fact that he was going to come on the dance floor. When Jason tilted his head upwards, he had so much lust in his eyes it was almost over right then. Steve moaned and bent down to kiss his lover with all he had. With their tongues duelling, his hands roaming all over Jason’s hot body, and their hips grinding in a maddeningly sexy way, he was soon too aroused to think. Coming in his pants seemed like a small price to pay for relief that got more urgent by the second. Painfully hard and gasping for air, he finally pulled back. “Need you.” Jason’s lip movements were clear, his pleading look even more so. “Fuck, yes, I need you too.” He looked around, hoping for a miracle. It looked like they had a choice between the crowded back wall and the rest rooms. Making his way towards the rest rooms was a no-brainer. He may have liked all this touching in public, but he wasn’t ready to come this way. Jason’s eyes were glazed over with lust by the time they made into a stall. His own felt as if they were crossed from exerting as much control as he was capable of. He locked the door, opened his pants and pulled out his hard cock. Jason was doing the same, and they had their hands on each other before he was able to take his next breath. Enclosing Jason’s throbbing cock in his fist, he started to jack him off. Silky skin slid back and forth against his palm. He’d grown to crave this feeling. It made Jason hotter than hell, and when his lover threw his head back against the wall in abandon, it fired him on as well. Finally Jason’s smaller hand made it to Steve’s cock. The first touch made him gasp. Shit, the guy had a firm grip, just the way he liked it. “Yes, just like that.” He’d tried to keep his voice down, but the chuckle from the next stall informed him he hadn’t quite succeeded. Fuck being embarrassed—they were all here for the same reason, right? The amused noise was followed by a loud moan, so he knew their neighbours were pretty much in the same situation as they were—coming closer to an explosive orgasm by the second. The fact he was sort of in public and could hear other men moaning and groaning all around him was an incredible turn-on. Not that he wasn’t about ready to explode without any additional help. Jason’s presence, his dazed look and firm hand were all he needed. “Gonna.” His voice sounded hoarse.

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Jason just grunted, redoubling his efforts. He pushed into Jason’s hand one last time and let go. Spurt after spurt of semen flooded his lover’s hand as Steve’s entire body shook with his release. “Man, that’s hot.” Jason stiffened and followed him into bliss. Panting heavily, he rested his forehead on Jason’s shoulder for a moment as he tried to recover. Jason leaned into him for support and they breathed together for a while. “Wow.” Jason looked up, his grey-green eyes glittering with happiness. “So much for needing a hotel room.” “Who says anything about not needing it?” He stepped back, got some paper and cleaned them both as best he could. “Surely, this was only just the beginning?” “You’re going to kill me.” Jason tucked his softening cock back into his pants. “But I’m going to enjoy every fucking second of it.” And wasn’t that the absolute best thing to look forward to?

**** Jason couldn’t wait for Steve to finally unlock their hotel room. After the ‘bathroom episode’, they’d gone back to dancing for a while, even though he’d been ready to head out. He hadn’t wanted to admit how hot he still was for more action after he’d just come, but now he wished he had. His cock was so hard inside his pants that it was difficult to walk. Steve had the same problem, but his hands were less shaky, so he’d volunteered to get the door. “Shit.” Steve stilled, took a deep breath and tried again. “You know, there are some definite advantages to old-fashioned keys. These magnetic strips just never seem to work when you don’t insert them at just the right speed.” “Man, don’t talk about inserting stuff right now, or I’m not going to make it into the room without embarrassing myself after all.” Jason bit his lower lip to stave off the thoughts of pushing into Steve’s ass. He wasn’t even sure his lover was ready for that, but he sure wanted to try. Steve stilled, then his shoulders started shaking. “What?” Jason gripped the man’s arm and shook him. “Come on! Focus here.”

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Steve’s laugh burst out, but apparently it also helped him relax enough to finally get the door open. Jason pushed him inside, kicked the self-locking door closed behind him and manoeuvred Steve straight towards the bed. “Naked. Now.” Jason pulled his T-shirt up and off, throwing it into the direction of the easy chair where they’d placed their street clothes after changing out of them earlier. Steve’s eyes widened, but he started taking off his own clothes with gratifying speed. They were both naked within seconds. Jason tackled Steve, and they tumbled onto the bed, laughing. He took Steve’s face between his hands and fused their lips together, kissing his lover with all he had. The feelings he was beginning to have for this man were overwhelming. He’d never felt this close to anyone, had never wanted to crawl inside their skin and stay there. Not sure how Steve would react, he hadn’t put his emotions into words yet, so he tried to get his body to speak for him. Moving closer, making sure their lower bodies touched as well, he ended up on top, straddling Steve’s strong thighs. Pushing forwards brought their cocks into alignment, and they both moaned with the delicious friction. All thoughts of wanting more left his head as his arousal spiked impossibly higher. “Yeah.” Steve’s voice now had that rough edge that it only got right before he came. “Fuck!” Jason pushed even closer, the tingling at the base of his spine spreading upwards as he came in pulses of pleasure that made him cling to Steve and gasp for breath. “Ugh.” Steve responded as more heat splashed between them. Boneless, Jason sank onto the bigger man’s body as he tried to catch his breath. He buried his face in the soft skin of his neck and breathed in the scent of sweat and fresh cum that usually made him hard. Not this time, though, which made him hope he’d finally get to play for a bit before the need to find relief became overwhelming. “I love it when you let go like that.” Steve’s large hands caressed his back, squeezing his ass for good measure. “It’s mutual.” He lifted his head and looked into Steve’s deep brown eyes. “Good.” Steve grinned and kissed him on the cheek. “I’m thinking shower.” “Absolutely.” He carefully unstuck himself then led the way into the surprisingly spacious bathroom.

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When the water was nice and warm he stepped under the spray, pulling Steve in behind him. He soaped up his hands and started washing his lover. Sliding his hands across all the slick, dark skin of his chest was a delight for all his senses. The contrast between their skin colours was as much a turn-on for him as the delicious sounds Steve made when he touched a particularly sensitive spot. The mixed scents of the sweat coming off and the lightly perfumed soap made him take deep breaths. Being allowed to touch all of it at will when they were alone was more fun than he’d ever thought two men could have together. Jason slid his hands farther down, avoiding Steve’s slowly hardening cock for now, and moved straight to the long legs and strong feet. He lifted one after the other to make sure they were squeaky clean, even between the toes. When he was done, he turned his face up and rose to give his lover a quick kiss. “Turn around.” Jason smiled when Steve looked hesitant. “Love watching you.” Steve’s back was as amazing as his front. The muscles along his shoulders and spine stood out, strengthened by work. His upper body tapered into a small waist, only to curve out to the most gorgeous ass Jason had ever laid eyes on. And he’d been watching men’s asses for years. He washed that tempting back and the long legs then returned to the ass cheeks. Kneading them made Steve tense for a moment before he relaxed into the massage. Jason didn’t dare go any further for now. He knew he wanted in eventually, but he doubted that Steve was ready. So he reached around instead, giving Steve’s cock and balls a thorough soaping. It made the bigger man squirm as he emitted delighted moans. “God, you’re good at that.” Steve turned around and embraced him. “Let me return the favour, huh?” “Okay.” He was pretty sure he was ready for more and hoped Steve had the courage to go through with it. When Steve’s big hands started washing him, he was in heaven even before his lover reached the good parts. When he was asked to turn around, he almost held his breath. Having his ass cheeks massaged was heaven, and he moaned loudly to make sure Steve knew how much he liked it. “You like that?” Steve’s voice was husky.

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Steve kept moving his fingers closer to where Jason now knew he wanted them but seemed to hesitate about the final step. “Yes.” He pushed his ass back into Steve’s solid grip. “Please…feels so good.” Steve took a deep breath and pushed a soapy finger into Jason’s crack. The touch of someone else on the sensitive skin made him gasp. “More!” God, that felt so good. Steve kept rubbing the now tingling skin and Jason started pushing back. He was beginning to wish for the next step—his hole beginning to twitch as his arousal rose. When Steve moved his other hand around to grasp his fully erect cock, he lost it and started fucking his lover’s fist. As soon as Steve touched his asshole again, putting the slightest pressure on the muscle, Jason started coming like a geyser. “Fuuuuuck!” His legs trembled as he painted the shower tiles white, the thrill of one of the best orgasms of his life travelling up and down his spine as he emptied his balls. If this was what a slight touch to that area of his body did to him—what would it be like to be fucked? He couldn’t wait to find out!

**** Riverside, Texas Sunday September 7, 2008 Jason was just about ready to call it a night, Steve having left earlier because he had an early start on Monday. Getting back into work mode after the weekend they’d had would be a challenge. He wasn’t looking forward to yet another confrontation with Leo, either. The man had hounded him on the last two Mondays, so he was sure he’d return to spout more nonsense about Jason supposedly cheating. The man really was as dumb as a post. There was absolutely no way to make sales numbers look better than they were. Not with items as big as cars, which were easy to count. But then, Leo had never been very clever with numbers, which explained his misconception that selling fewer expensive cars must be better than selling a higher number of cheaper cars. The man just wasn’t any good at basic math.

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What Leo had proven very good at was figuring out Jason’s weak points and how they could be used to have the highest impact or damage. Leo’s threat to blackmail Jason by telling Tim he was gay, potentially outing Steve at the same time, had gone straight to the heart of the matter. Jason had worried about it all week. He sighed as he pulled a beer from the fridge. Just one so he’d sleep better. It was probably best to go talk to Tim so that he was prepared. Facing the situation head on was better than trying to hide. On his way to the sofa in the living room for a bit of channel surfing, he was shocked when the doorbell rang. It was nine o’clock on a Sunday night and he wasn’t expecting anyone. Should he even react? Curiosity won out and he went to the door to check the peephole. Shit! What was Tim doing here? A fairly angry-looking Tim at that. His boss had never come to see him at home, so why now? This couldn’t be good news. He opened the door. “Tim?” His smile felt like a fake even to him. “Jason.” Tim nodded once. His piercing gaze and unmoving face did nothing to reassure Jason that his worst nightmare hadn’t come true. “What can I do for you?” “We need to talk.” Tim looked past him into the apartment. “I’m sorry to disturb you this late, but this really can’t wait.” “Sure.” Jason stepped aside, then closed the door and preceded his unexpected guest into the living room. “Would you like a drink?” “Just some water, please.” Tim took a seat after a quick glance around. Thank God he’d done a bit of cleaning since he’d hoped Steve would spend some time with him after their return from the gay club. He’d been right and Steve had come in for a while, just not long enough for his taste. In a way, now that Tim had suddenly turned up, that was probably a good thing. His hands shook as he filled a glass for Tim and carried it back to where the man was sitting, looking way too relaxed for what Jason knew was going to come. “Thank you.” Tim took a sip then placed the glass on the end table.

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Jason took a seat on one of the chairs. He felt like a small boy having to face the principal for some misdeed. His palms were sweaty and he tried to dry them on his shorts. The bottle of beer remained untouched—there was no point in clouding his judgement with alcohol. “From the look on your face I’m guessing that you know why I’m here.” Tim leant back, settling in for the duration. “Now I know that I was right to come and talk to you about this whole situation.” Jason nodded, too nervous to speak. “Leo Clark came to see me today. He told me some very interesting things.” Tim frowned. “Things I was unaware of but wish you had told me about.” “What…” His voice was too close to a squeak for comfort. He cleared his throat and tried again. “What did he tell you?” “It was one of the weirdest conversations I’ve ever had with him. And there have been a few over the last year or so, after I took over from my parents and started making changes to the type of cars we focus on.” Tim shook his head. “Leo is just one of those old-fashioned salesmen who put the status of what they sell over everything else. Of course, that is false economics, especially in times of recession, but he just doesn’t seem to want to understand that.” “I know.” He had his own run-ins with the man to prove it. “I’m sure you do.” Tim took another sip of his water, seeming to collect his thoughts for a moment. “Anyway, that wasn’t the weirdest part of this particular discussion.” “I think I owe you an apology.” Jason took a deep breath. “But you don’t even know what I’m going to say next.” Tim’s eyebrows rose. “I don’t know for sure, you’re right. But I have a strong suspicion what this will be about. I’d rather tell you myself, since I was going to talk to you about it tomorrow anyway.” Jason swallowed. “I may as well say it now.” “Okay.” Tim smiled. “I respect that.” “There’s no easy way to say this.” Jason had never told anyone before and he couldn’t believe how hard it was to get the words out now. “I’m gay.” Tim nodded, as if he was trying to encourage him to go on. He didn’t look angry or disgusted at all, so there might be hope.

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“I guess I’ve always known but there never seemed to be any reason to tell anyone. Part of it was because it’s easier to seem straight, part of it was because I’d never found a man I was interested in enough to ‘risk’ coming out for.” He sat back, trying to relax. “And that has changed now?” Tim looked surprised. Oh, shit, maybe Leo hadn’t told him everything. “Yes.” That was all he was going to say. He wasn’t going to out Steve to his older brother for anything. In fact, it wasn’t his place to out Steve at all. “But the other guy isn’t ready to come out?” Tim frowned. “That’s very hard on both of you, I’m sure.” “What?” That so wasn’t the reaction he’d expected, not in his wildest dreams. “How do you mean ‘what’? Secrets are hard on a relationship and big ones like that can be lethal, I’m sure.” Tim shook his head. “I know it’s none of my business, but this man must be very special if you’re ready to come out for him. I just hope he’s worthy of your trust.” “I’m totally floored.” Jason sat back, not knowing what to say for once. “Why?” Tim tilted his head. “You’re taking this awfully well.” He swallowed. “I hoped you’d understand. Leo tried to blackmail me with this, but I refused to take his bait. Even though I hoped you wouldn’t fire me, I wasn’t sure. Leo has been with you a lot longer than I have, so there was always the possibility you’d let him stay and kick me out.” “I would never do that! And there’s nothing much to take well.” Tim shrugged. “You know that my friend Ben came out when he finally got together with Zeke in July. Knowing that they’re in love, rather than being ‘just’ best friends like they used to be hasn’t changed how I feel about either of them. So why would it in your case?” “Because you have to work with me? Because some of my colleagues might have issues and that will cause problems in the team?” Shit, he should probably stop trying to convince Tim there were going to be problems. “I’ll tell you the same thing I will tell them.” Tim sat up straight, his eyes shining with determination. “Anyone who has an issue with someone else’s sexual orientation has a problem. It is up to them to accept or reject you in light of this new piece of information. Anyone who has a real issue will be told it is theirs to resolve, not your problem.”

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“What if they refuse?” He knew how hard some people were on gays, he’d read the newspaper articles and watched the news coverage. “That really is their problem. If they cannot work with you, they will need to go look for another job. I will give them a good reference in line with their actual performance, of course, but I will not stand for them working in my dealership.” Tim smiled. “And you can take that to the bank.” “So you’re really okay with this?” He still couldn’t quite believe it. “Yes, I am.” Tim held out his hand. “We can shake on it, if you want.” It was one of the best handshakes he’d ever experienced.

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Chapter Five

Riverside, Texas Monday 8 September, 2008 “Let’s celebrate.” Hank grinned as he led the way into the pub. Steve had seen no way out of the after-work snack and drinks without creating a major issue about him being aloof. He’d avoided his two obnoxious co-workers as much as possible over the past week, but there was a limit to their patience. He was beginning to hate them for making him do what they thought was right, but he hadn’t been ready to face the consequences of withdrawing from all after-work activities. “What are we celebrating?” Ed, as usual, hung on Hank’s every word. Pete and Ross just trailed behind, looking too exhausted from a full day’s work to be of much use. “That we finally get to work in a fag-free environment.” Hank found them a table and sat down. “It really was about time that little fucker was let go. In fact, I think we should talk about finding and getting rid of any other potential assholes like him.” “Great idea!” Ed banged a fist on the table. “Let’s go get them.” “Yeah!” Ross looked a lot more aware than he had a few minutes ago. Steve’s mouth almost dropped open. These men, probably encouraged by Blaine’s leaving, had apparently gone from being homophobic to actively and openly pursuing their hatred. There was no way he could participate or condone it by staying silent. Only a major effort stopped him from showing his shock. He needed to find the right moment to make his stance clear, but he now knew he had no choice, consequences be damned. “I’ll get our food orders.” Steve needed some time to marshal his thoughts, and organising their food would give him the opportunity. It was the first time he was grateful this pub had adopted the British custom of making people go to the bar to order their food. Why they did it like that he’d never understand,

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since they had waiters and waitresses to bring the meals to the tables. But apparently that didn’t mean they could be trusted with the orders. Ordering complete, he went to the other end of the bar to pick up their drinks and returned to the table. Hank and Ed were deep into discussing their various colleagues with Pete and Ross listening without contributing more than the occasional nod or approving grunt. A group of cavemen sitting around a fire wouldn’t have looked much different. Why had he ever wanted to spend time with them? Of course, he knew the answer. He distributed the drinks and sat down, taking a few sips of his cold beer. Being accepted had been important to him, so he’d closed his eyes to a lot of things in the name of being part of the group. Well, no more. It just wasn’t right to go on a crusade against fellow human beings like that, for whatever reason. He ruthlessly shoved aside the fear that they’d go after him for defending Blaine. “What do you think?” Hank’s voice pulled him from his thoughts. “About what?” He put down his glass. “Sheesh, even when you’re here you don’t pay attention. What the hell is wrong with you lately?” Hank glared at him. “Sorry, I was just thinking.” He sat back in his chair, feeling defensive and hating it. He hadn’t done anything wrong. All this pressure to do whatever the group leader decided was getting to him. “That’s the problem—too much thinking and not enough action!” Hank slammed his half-empty glass back onto the table with enough force to make some of the beer spill. “So, what were you asking?” He wanted to get back to the main discussion so he could find an opening to say his piece and leave. There was no way he was going to spend the evening with these Neanderthals when seeing Jason was the alternative. “I said we should confront the guys we think may be fags, make them admit or deny it. That way, once we catch them, we’ll have proof they lied about it.” Hank looked proud of himself as Ed slapped his shoulder. “We should corner them and let them know what we think about them while we’re at it.” Ross looked around the table, looking for support. Everyone nodded except Hank, who was still staring at Steve.

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“I can’t say I agree with any of this.” Steve’s heart sank when he saw the anger in the other men’s faces. “Excuse me?” Hank’s voice was thunderous. “Did I just hear you right? You want to let these fags take over?” “Who said anything about them taking over?” He had no idea where these men got that idea from. “They—if ‘they’ even exist—haven’t done anything to us, have they?” Widened eyes and dropped jaws were the only reply. “Well? Have they approached any of you? Said anything to try and convince you to become one of them?” The whole idea was utterly ridiculous to anyone with half a brain cell. “They don’t need to.” Hank recovered first. “What?” Steve felt as if he’d missed part of the conversation. “Their presence is enough.” Hank nodded, looking around for support. It was immediately given, the others nodding vigorously. “They shouldn’t be allowed to work with us. They’re offensive and immoral and should be isolated so they’re no danger to the rest of us.” Oh my God, the man really believes this crap. “Exactly.” Ed leant forwards. “Or do you want to be stuck up on a platform with someone like Blaine next to you? You’ll never know when he’ll make his move. And what if it happens when you can’t get away?” More vigorous nodding from Ed and Ross. There clearly was no hope for them. “I don’t know why you’re making such a big deal out of this all of a sudden. We’ve never had any issues. Blaine never did anything to make anyone feel uncomfortable, and if there are others, we don’t know who they are.” He took a deep breath. “Personally, I don’t want to go on what looks to me like a witch hunt. I think it’s wrong.” “You do?” Hank leant back and narrowed his eyes. “Sounds to me like you’re protecting them. And why would that be?” “Shit, he’s one of them.” Ed’s eyes widened as he backed away. “Obviously that’s the only explanation.” Hank nodded. “Nobody in their right mind would support them.” “You can’t be serious.” Steve felt like a bug under a microscope when everyone stared at him with mistrust and anger. “Just because I’m not in favour of hunting down innocent

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people who never did anything to deserve this vendetta you suddenly seem to have going doesn’t mean I’m one of them.” “I have a hard time believing that.” Hank fisted his hands and moved back his chair. “Nobody in their right mind would side with deviant scum unless he had something to hide himself. I suggest we take this outside.” Steve’s mouth did fall open this time. He wasn’t going to move, though. Hank was a lot taller and stronger than he was. Taking it outside could only mean one thing, and he didn’t want to risk injury over this. The fist that hit his jaw came out of nowhere. Pain radiated up into his brain, making him see stars. Apparently Hank had decided to stop waiting. Steve jumped up, ready to defend himself. Before he knew what had happened, the others had surrounded him, holding him immobile as Hank and Ed laid into him. He absorbed punch after punch to his face and belly, struggling to get free so he could defend or at least protect himself. All he managed to do was make them angrier. Finally, the pain was too much for him to remain standing and he sagged in their grip. They let him go and he curled himself into a ball, trying to protect his bloodied face and bruised ribs. They started kicking him with their feet, the pain making him groan. He yelled at them to stop, but there was no relief. He vaguely heard other voices trying to intervene, a call for nine-one-one…then everything faded into darkness.

**** Riverside, Texas Tuesday September 9, 2008 Jason was ready to leave his car to ask the driver in front of him if he even had a licence. The man was hardly moving at all, and there was no way Jason could pass him here or for the next five miles of very busy two-lane road. He’d rarely been so impatient to get to his destination. St. Agnes Hospital wasn’t even that far from the car dealership, but traffic at the end of the work day got bad, even in Riverside.

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Today, he had zero understanding for others and no patience. He’d started practically chewing his nails when Tim’s secretary, Anne, had told everyone that Tim wouldn’t be in today owing to a family emergency. Since Tim hadn’t left the city to see his parents, or so Anne had said when he’d asked her, it could only mean there was something wrong with Steve. It had taken Jason the rest of the afternoon and several attempts to get Anne to tell him more. As soon as she’d informed him that Steve was in the hospital, he’d paused only to ask which one before jumping into his car. Now he was well on his way to insanity, stuck behind a driver who seemed to have all the time in the world. He needed to see Steve, find out what had happened and do whatever he could to help his lover get better. He wanted that right now and not whenever traffic allowed him to make it. When he finally arrived at his destination, it took ages to find a parking spot and another eternity for the receptionist to tell him anything. Apparently Steve was no longer in Intensive Care, but in a room on the seventh floor under close observation. He begged her to call the station nurse so she could talk to Tim—he needed a family member’s permission to be let near Steve. When he was finally given the green light to go to room seven-thirty-one, he already felt better, even though he didn’t know much more than before. Too impatient to wait for the elevator, he ran up the seven floors, arriving totally out of breath. By the time he’d figured out the strange room numbering system and found Steve’s room, he was breathing normally again. He knocked and went inside, his heart hammering in his chest—this time from fear. His gaze jumped to the hospital bed. The little of Steve that was visible under the blanket was covered in bandages, the visible skin even darker than usual with numerous bruises. There was a tube in his nose and an IV had been inserted in his hand. His eyes were closed, but he was breathing on his own. Jason rushed to the bedside and took Steve’s free hand into his own, holding on as if his life depended on it. “Man.” He felt dizzy and almost collapsed as he started trembling with a mixture of relief at seeing Steve alive and fear about the bad state he seemed to be in and how he’d come to be hurt.

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Tim raced around the bed and caught him before he fell, and, as embarrassed as he was about his sudden weakness, he was grateful for the support as the other man pushed a chair under him. “I guess that answers my question.” Tim’s smile was weak, his face drawn and pale. “W-what question?” He looked up. “Why you were so worried about Steve when you had me called just now.” Tim glanced at Jason’s hands that were still clutching Steve’s. “Sorry.” Jason started to withdraw, but Tim’s hand landed on top of his, clearly encouraging him to leave it where it was. “No need to apologise. Steve is going to need all the support he can get to make it through this.” Tim smiled hesitantly. “He’s been mumbling your name, but I wasn’t sure I’d heard right until I saw you come in just now. Your reaction spoke volumes.” “You don’t mind?” He was trying not to lose it. “Not at all. I like you, and if Steve has chosen to be with you that’s good enough for me.” Tim patted his hand and walked back around the bed to sit in the second chair. “What happened?” Jason was going to kill whoever did this to his lover. “The police said—” “The police?” He sat up, shocked to his core. “Yes. Apparently Steve went out for a meal and some drinks last night. It was the same group he usually hangs out with, according to one of them—a Pete Sunder. He was the one least reluctant to talk about what happened.” Tim took a deep breath. “It seems that one of their colleagues had recently been fired for being gay.” “What?” No wonder Steve had been so hesitant about coming out. “Unbelievable, I know.” Tim sighed. “Anyway, they started talking about finding other gay men and getting rid of them as well, since they didn’t want to work with them. Steve started protesting, saying it wasn’t right to persecute people like that for their sexual orientation. Of course, they accused him of being gay as well then started to beat him up. Other customers called nine-one-one while some of them pulled the four big men off Steve, but it took them a while. By then, the damage had been done.” “Where are they now?” He hoped for their sake they were locked away very securely.

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“They’re in custody, awaiting formal charges. For now, I charged them on Steve’s behalf, but he’ll have to confirm that’s what he wants once he regains consciousness.” Tim looked down at his hands. “I’m pretty sure he’ll want to do that.” Jason couldn’t believe his lover had worked with these people. It just proved that most of the world was a very dangerous place for gay men. There was no way he was going to ask Steve to come out now. He’d want to get back to his job, or one like it, and would be at risk of being exposed again. A sharp pain made Jason’s heart ache. He needed to protect Steve from something like this ever happening again. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if Steve was hurt again because of them being a couple. His lover would come to the same conclusion, he was sure. He hadn’t been enthusiastic about living as a gay man anyway. Something like this was more than enough disincentive. There was only one thing he could do. He’d stay until Steve woke up, make sure he was on his way to recovery then he’d get out of his life. It was better like that, for both of them. If only it didn’t hurt so much.

**** Phoenix, Arizona Thursday September 25, 2008 Steve stared at the mirror. It had taken a long time, but the bruises and scrapes were finally beginning to fade. His body was healing itself, supported by his mother’s fussing and his father’s quiet support. Tim’s suggestion for him to spend some time away from Riverside, to stay with their parents for a while, had been a good one. Being away from his employer, who still insisted he’d done nothing wrong, had enabled him to do some thinking about the kind of work environment he wanted to go back to once he was fit again. He didn’t have a lot of choices, not without a degree or some sort of trade, but there had to be better places to work than Crystal Clear. At this point, he wasn’t

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even sure he was going to return to Riverside. Phoenix was growing on him with its perfect weather, wide roads, palm trees and desert vistas as soon as you left the downtown area. A big part of his reluctance to ever return to what he still thought of as his home was the idea of Jason being there. He just couldn’t understand why he’d deserted him after that first week. He’d been so supportive at first, making sure Steve had everything he needed. Then, from one day to the next, he’d abruptly told Steve it wasn’t safe to be seen together, that he never wanted him to face violence like that again, that he was sorry, but it was better for both of them to call it quits. He hadn’t been able to get a word in edgewise and Jason was gone before he knew it. Tim had been livid, suggesting Steve visit their parents for a while. But he couldn’t keep running, could he? Brushing his hair to finish the routine, he sighed. The physical, external injuries may have almost healed, but his emotional wounds were still wide open. He’d just started to develop feelings for Jason, had considered admitting them to his lover and coming out—and now this? It hurt more than he could say. The problem was that he’d never felt as much for any of the women he’d dated or had a relationship with as he did for Jason—even though they’d known each other less than two months. As odd as it was, he’d thought it was a sign that there was meant to be more between them. The potential had certainly been there. “Breakfast is ready.” His mother’s voice from down the hall carried well in the small adobe-style bungalow his parents now lived in. “And I’m hungry.” His father’s deep voice reassured him. “Just a minute.” One last look convinced him he was as ready as he could be. “Oh, come on, you’re beautiful enough, I’m sure.” His mother’s grin was audible even at a distance. When he entered the kitchen with its breakfast nook that looked out on the landscaped desert garden with its cacti and succulents, he smiled right back at her. “Good morning, Mom.” He kissed her on the cheek, still as pale as ever despite the strong Arizona sun she’d been exposed to for a while now then slapped his father on the back. “Morning, Dad.”

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“You feel better today, don’t you?” His mother got up to fetch the blueberry pancakes she knew he loved so much and put a whole stack of them on his plate before pointing at the maple syrup. “Yes, and a lot of that is thanks to your excellent cooking.” He smiled and poured the syrup. “I’m going to get fat if this goes on much longer, but I can’t say I even care at this moment.” “Oh, no, we can’t have you get fat!” His father winked at him, dark eyes twinkling, before he stole the syrup. “You need to stay in excellent shape so you can find someone to love. Seems to me we might need to look at young men instead of young women?” “Dad…” He stopped moving and stared at his father. Both his parents had been very understanding when he’d told them about Jason. The point about him being bisexual apparently hadn’t quite made it yet. “It’s way too early for me to think about another relationship.” God save him from more heartbreak. There was no way he was ready for that. “And, as I tried to explain, it might be a woman or a man. It’ll depend on the person.” “That just confuses me.” His mother added some fresh cream to her pancakes, always having preferred that to syrup. “I know you tried to explain it to us, and I’m sure you know how to deal with it, or you will figure it out. But that just feels a little odd to me.” “I know what you mean, Mom.” He sipped some coffee to strengthen himself for the sugar and carb attack he was about to experience. “It was confusing to me as well, at least at first. But in the end? I think it’s about the person for me more than anything else. There was just such a bond with Jason, so quickly…” Shit, he was going to cry again if he wasn’t careful. “I can see how bonding with a man might be easier.” His father looked thoughtful as he slowly chewed his food. “That part at least makes some sense to me. Not thinking about where that’s going to lead.” “I’m impressed with how well you’ve taken all of this. I was afraid you’d kick me out, but I didn’t want to lie to you any longer, not about something as important as this.” “We never understood or agreed with what David’s parents did when they found out about him and Elliot!” His mother looked as shocked as if it had happened yesterday.

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“That was Tim’s best friend’s younger brother, wasn’t it? What was his name? Harry?” He vaguely remembered those events but it had been five years ago, and he hadn’t really known anyone involved. “Exactly. Harry was very upset, from what Tim said, but he’d already moved to Oregon to get his degree at that fancy computer college, so he missed a lot of the fallout.” His mother shook her head. “We’d never do that to you.” “I’m very grateful.” He took his first bite of the syrupy pancakes and moaned with delight. This was what he was going to focus on for a while. It would help him deal with the pain he felt inside. “But I don’t think I want to think about another relationship, not this soon.” “I understand that, don’t worry.” His mother patted his hand. “Mr. Overeager here will be stopped if needed, believe me. You’ve got to do this at your own speed. We just want you to know that you’ll have our support either way, okay?” “Okay. Thanks.” He focussed on eating his pancakes for a while. The simple enjoyment of good food was worth taking note of. “Are you ready for the grand tour?” His father had already wolfed down half of his pancakes. “Sure.” He took a second bite and rolled his eyes, it was so good. There was a day of sightseeing ahead, something he felt more comfortable doing now that he didn’t look all torn up any longer. Moving had become easier as the bruises had healed, so he was able to walk almost pain-free. A distraction was exactly what he needed to help him forget how betrayed he felt by Jason’s up and leaving.

**** Riverside, Texas Friday September 26, 2008 “Can I talk to you for a moment?” Tim’s voice was carefully neutral and he wore his boss face. “I’d like to discuss a few things with you in my office, please.”

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“Sure.” Jason swallowed. Was this it? Tim had been very angry when Jason had broken up with Steve two weeks ago but had told Jason that he wasn’t going to let it influence their working relationship. They were both professionals, according to Tim. The underlying anger about his younger brother being hurt emotionally on top of his physical injuries had probably remained, though. Jason had always feared it would come out at some point. He quietly followed Tim into his office, trying to ready himself for the blow of being fired. But really, how was he supposed to prepare himself for that? Tim indicated the sofa, which was unexpected. Serious work-related discussions were usually conducted with Tim behind the desk. What could this possibly be about? They sat down. “First, I have some good news for you. Well, for the entire dealership, really, but I think it will be a major relief for you personally.” Tim rubbed his temples and sat back. “Leo Clark has finally managed to find another job.” “He has?” Jason’s eyes widened. “I didn’t even know he was looking. I should have known something was going on. He’s been almost suspiciously quiet over the last two weeks. I figured you’d just told him to stop his harassment after his attempt at blackmailing me didn’t work.” “I did tell him to lay off you.” Tim’s smile was weak, but it was there. “He and I never agreed on sales priorities or on the direction this business should take. As much experience as he has, his style just doesn’t fit with what I want for the dealership. So, I asked him to not only leave you alone, but to start looking for a position where his particular style would be of more use. He’ll be starting there next Wednesday, but his last day here is today.” “That is good news and a weight off my shoulders. Thank you for telling me.” He didn’t deserve Tim being so nice to him, so what was going on? “You’re welcome.” Tim leant forwards, putting his elbows on his thighs. “Which brings me to the second topic.” “Okay.” Had he been standing up, his knees would have wobbled. “Don’t you think that this nonsense of you staying away from Steve has lasted long enough?” Tim’s gaze was intense enough to burn a hole into Jason’s head. At least, that’s what it felt like.

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“What?” This was the last thing he’d expected Tim to come up with. They’d never so much as talked about his decision to break up with Steve. Tim not minding them being together was one thing, but an active attempt to reunite them despite all the obstacles? That was entirely different and made him respect Tim and his love for his younger brother even more. “You heard me.” Tim’s eyes sparkled with indignation. “I didn’t say anything at first because I figured you were probably trying to protect him. I didn’t agree with the way you did it, but I could see where you were coming from.” “That’s exactly what I’m trying to do.” It hurt to think about what those brutes had done to Steve even now. He’d never forget the way his lover had looked at the hospital. There was no way he could let something like that happen ever again. “Like I said, I can sort of understand your reasoning. I don’t think it’s any sort of a longterm solution to try to make Steve go back into the closet, though. It may look like the easy and safe solution, but do you really think he’ll be happy that way?” Tim’s eyebrows had risen steadily as he’d spoken. “No, I guess not.” Shit, he hadn’t even thought about that. He’d been too absorbed in his own pain. “And the other thing I can’t understand is why you’re still staying away from him. You’re obviously miserable, and I know from talking to my parents that he isn’t doing much better.” Tim sat up. “Since you aren’t about to come to your senses from what I can see, I’ve decided to talk to you about it.” “What’s there to talk about?” Jason raked his fingers through his hair. “I wish there was something I could do, but I don’t think the situation has changed. Steve will probably want to go back to work for Crystal Clear, even though I wish he wouldn’t. We all know how hard it is to find a job in this economy. He may have no choice. I want to make sure that he’s got the best possible chances to be accepted by his colleagues. Some of them may be as homophobic as the ones awaiting trial, even if they haven’t been aggressive so far.” “That’s nonsense and you know it.” Tim frowned. “I can’t see Steve going back to that company, and if he tries I will certainly stop him. That sort of environment isn’t good for anyone, and I don’t want him working there. I understand his need to be independent, which is why he never accepted a job here, but I can’t let him endanger his life. I have some friends

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and business contacts and I’m sure one of them will have something suitable if and when Steve comes back.” “Don’t you agree that the best way to protect him is for him to continue his life as it was before? I’m sure he can find a woman to fall in love with. It would be so much easier for him…” He sighed. Too bad that option wasn’t going to work for him. “Easier isn’t the point here. From the few talks we’ve had before Steve left for Phoenix, it’s become pretty clear to me that he has very deep feelings for you. Steve being Steve, he won’t forget them from one day to the next. You’re not doing him, or yourself, any favours by trying to stay away from him.” Tim smiled. “What I’m trying to tell you here is that you owe it to yourself and him to find out where your relationship can go. Everything else will work out one way or the other.” “Is that why you didn’t fire me?” He just needed to know. “That’s part of it, yes.” Tim relaxed and sat back. “The other part is that I believe personal differences, as long as they aren’t fundamental, shouldn’t determine whom we work with. I must admit that it will be difficult for me to keep working with you if you refuse to try and make up with Steve, but in the end your personal life shouldn’t be my concern.” “That’s very generous of you.” Jason suddenly felt restless. “You’ve definitely given me something to think about.” “Good!” Tim grinned and got up. “I just hope that you’ll make the right decision.” Jason nodded, got up and left the office. It was time to do some thinking. His gut said that Tim was right. He already knew that he had deeper feelings for Steve than he’d thought possible after so short a time. And if Steve was in the same sort of position, maybe there was hope. At the very least it was worth a try, wasn’t it? The more he thought about it, the more he realised how difficult it was going to be. He’d left Steve at the worst possible moment, when his lover was already down. There was a lot of apologising and grovelling in his future. But it would be worth it if he could get Steve to forgive him.

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Chapter Six

Phoenix, Arizona Saturday September 27, 2008 “Are you going to gang up on me too?” Steve held on to the front door in the hopes of not screaming in frustration at his family’s efforts to get him back together with Jason. A grinning Tim stood on the path, illuminated by the bright morning sunshine. It may have been ten o’clock, and his parents had probably been up and at the golf course for hours, but Steve had had another almost sleepless night and was still tired. “Good morning to you too, little brother.” Tim lifted his duffel. “Can I come in?” “Sure.” Too shocked to do or say anything else, Steve stepped back and closed the front door once his brother had come in. “Just as a technicality, I don’t think it’s possible for one person on their own to ‘gang up’ on somebody.” Tim dropped his duffle next to the little table in the hallway and turned around. “Essentially, you’re right, though. I’m here to try to talk some sense into you.” “You came an awfully long way. What on earth made you do that? Don’t you think calling me on the phone would have been enough?” Steve led the way into the living room where they took seats on opposite ends of the sofa. “Maybe, maybe not. I didn’t want to run the risk of you hanging up on me.” Tim slapped him on the shoulder. “I would never do that!” Just because he’d done it once when he was twelve years old, when Tim had called him to tell him he needed to come home from a somewhat nonapproved party, didn’t mean he was going to do it again. Tim just raised an eyebrow. “Really! I’m way beyond those sorts of games.” He decided a distraction was in order. “Would you like something to drink?” “Before I gang up on you, you mean?” Tim grinned and nodded. “I would love some juice. The heat here, even in September, is quite fierce.”

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Glad for the excuse to get up and have a few moments to himself, Steve made his way to the fridge. He pulled out the carafe with freshly pressed orange juice his mother always kept there and poured them each a glass. His parents were clearly worried about his happiness. He hadn’t been sleeping well since he’d left Riverside, and the fact that he was still healing from the beating wasn’t the only reason. Physical discomfort had been the dominant issue at first, but for the last week it had become clear that wasn’t the only reason for his insomnia. Being apart from Jason hurt. All he wanted was to return to how things had been before the beating. And now Tim had made the effort of flying over here to talk to him in person. It may not have been a long flight, only two and a half hours, but Tim had a business to run. The fact that he’d taken time off on a Saturday, one of the busiest and most lucrative days for him, spoke volumes. He sighed as he returned the carafe to the fridge. His family had good reason to worry about him, and it was touching that they cared so much. He still felt pressured, though. He walked back to the living room, determined to talk it out with Tim. “Here you go.” He sat back down, sipped his juice and waited for Tim to start talking. “Thanks.” Tim emptied half his glass before he set it onto the coffee table in front of the sofa. “You’ve guessed the reason why I’m here perfectly. Our phone calls don’t seem to have changed anything, so I thought it might be better to come see you.” “I appreciate that everyone is worried about me, but all I need is some time to think things through.” He wasn’t going to admit that he didn’t think it was going to get him anywhere. What he needed was a plan. A change in his life. Something. “Thinking things through isn’t going to get you anywhere. Please don’t get me wrong, I understand that you need some time to get your life back together again, but hiding out here in Phoenix isn’t going to help.” Tim frowned. “I think it’s time for to you to come back to Riverside and face your life and what you want to do with it.” “It hasn’t even been three weeks yet.” Even though the four bastards who had attacked him were in prison, he didn’t know if he could face being back. “I think the longer you wait the more difficult it’s going to be.” Tim rubbed his face for a moment. “Look, I can’t pretend to know what it’s like to be in your situation. But I do have a feeling it’s not going to get easier. It’s nothing like falling off a horse and getting back on

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again, but I think the principle is the same. The sooner you come back and face your fears, the better. And I will be there for you all the way. No more of that distance between us that seems to have sneaked in since Mom and Dad left.” “No?” That might make a big difference. Tim shook his head. “I think part of that was my own fault because I needed to prove that I can take care of myself. But I hadn’t expected to almost completely lose touch with you.” Steve smiled. “It’s good to hear that you want to change this, too.” “Absolutely.” Tim nodded. “Now, I hope that you’re not thinking about working for Crystal Clear again. Are you?” “I don’t know what else to do, but it wouldn’t be my first choice, no.” And if that wasn’t the understatement of the century, he didn’t know what was. “I am so glad we agree. You probably don’t want to work for the dealership, but I’m sure you could find something else if you’re okay with checking out some of my business contacts. There are a few who work in business that are big enough to need their own window washers or janitors.” Tim looked so hesitant, it was almost funny. “That’s a very good idea. I don’t think I need to prove myself anymore—having just recently bought my first car has sort of made that point.” He smiled, loving to see the relief spread on Tim’s face. “Thank you for offering to help me. I think I’ll take you up on that.” “Good. I’m glad we got that settled. Now, can we go and have some fun? I’ve got to play tomorrow afternoon before my return flight and I’d love to see some of that famous desert landscape which seems to be in abundant supply around here.” Tim got up, clearly ready to go. “Hold on, what about breakfast?” He wasn’t all that hungry but leaving the house without at least some food in his stomach wasn’t a good idea. “Breakfast? At this time of the day?” Tim grinned. “It’s good to see that some things, like my little brother’s sleeping habits, don’t change.” “I’ll get you for that!” He was smiling from one ear to the other, though. It was good to have his big brother back. When the doorbell rang a few moments later, just as he was ready to start eating his cereal, he almost groaned at the interruption. Who could that possibly be?

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“Flowers for a Mr. Steve Jacobi?” The cute delivery boy held a huge bouquet of wild flowers. “That’s me.” Steve took the bouquet automatically. “Who are they from?” “There’s usually a card, sir.” The boy stepped from one foot to the other, looking hopeful. Steve wanted nothing more than to find the card as quickly as possible, but when the boy didn’t leave, he realised he was probably waiting for a tip. Digging for some money in his shorts pocket, he unearthed some crumpled bills that he handed to the boy without checking. “Well, thank you so much, sir.” The boy made a hasty retreat, holding on to his loot with a tight fist. The tip had probably been far too high, but Steve couldn’t begin to care. All he was interested in right now was finding out who the flowers had come from. He didn’t allow himself to think about the meaning of the hopeful flutters in his stomach. “Well, they look nice. Who are they from?” Tim leaned over to smell the flowers. “That’s what I’m trying to find out.” Steve carefully removed the outer wrapping, looking for the elusive card. Seconds later he found it. It was inside a bright red envelope and the printed text said, I am so very sorry for leaving you. Please give me another chance? “Good for him!” Tim looked as triumphant as if he’d written the card himself. “You put him up to this?” That would be so disappointing. He didn’t know why, but he wanted Jason to see how wrong he’d been, not be pushed into doing this by someone else. “No way.” Tim shook his head. “We did talk about his stupidity, but I never suggested what he should do about it.” For some reason that made Steve feel a lot better. His heart told him to forgive Jason right away, missing him was awful. But his head said that he should make Jason work for it a little longer, so he actually learned from the experience. And if he was really honest with himself, part of it was that he still hurt too much to just let it be over with. The relief about Jason having taken the initiative was immense, though. He now had more than one reason to return to Riverside and try to put his life back together again. He’d have to check seat availability on Tim’s flight tomorrow afternoon.

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**** Riverside, Texas Saturday October 4, 2008 Jason was running out of ideas. He’d sent flowers to Steve’s parents’ address in Phoenix last Saturday, and when Tim had told him that Steve had come back with him the very next day, he’d been shocked. That hadn’t stopped him from continuing his campaign, so on Monday he’d sent chocolates accompanied by more apologies, followed by a bouquet of cupcakes on Wednesday. A fruit basket had been his gift on Friday, and that was the first time that Steve had acknowledged a gift. It had been a simple thank you sent by text, but Jason had taken it as a good sign. He stared at the tickets for the Sunday night mini-concert at their favourite Italian restaurant. Was he assuming too much? He was so desperate to see Steve, but he had no idea if the other man was ready for a meeting in person. How the hell was he going to find out? There was nothing for it. He needed to step up his campaign, so he’d go by Steve’s apartment this afternoon, go down on his knees and ask for forgiveness one more time. It turned out to be one of those things that were easier said than done. He stood in front of Steve’s apartment building, wondering how he would even get in without alerting his hopefully soon to be again lover that he was on his way. In his mind, he’d imagined their first contact to be personal and not through a tinny loudspeaker system. Luckily, one of Steve’s neighbours turned out to be a dog owner on her way to walking her two golden retrievers. Evidently not worried about the security aspect of letting a stranger into the building, she had no problem leaving it open for him and he quickly made his way inside. Even not having been here before, number three-zero-seven was easy to find. When he stood in front of Steve’s door, all his courage suddenly drained away. This was one of the most important moments in his life but he couldn’t remember a single word

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of his prepared speech. He was about to turn around to try and recover his ability to think when the door opened of its own accord. Looking at Steve as he stood there, Jason’s mouth was suddenly as dry as the Arizona desert before the rainy season. Steve was as tall and strong as Jason remembered, his broad shoulders and well-muscled chest barely contained in a light blue T-shirt. Tight jeans shorts showed his package to advantage, and his long legs completed the picture of a man Jason wanted to lick from head to toe and everywhere in between. “Jason?” Steve’s eyes widened. “S-Steve.” He stood and drank in the sight of his gorgeous man, speechless at the sudden confrontation that was so different from what he had imagined. “Do you want to come in?” Steve smiled, his perfect white teeth making a welcome appearance in the handsome face. “Please?” He nodded and followed, barely registering the tiny hallway, the kitchen to their left and the door to another room on their right. The living room was straight ahead and contained a sofa that had seen better days, an old TV and some basic bookshelves on one of the walls. “Water?” Steve sat down only after Jason shook his head. No distractions. He’d come here with a purpose and he was going to finally make his apology in person. “I’m sorry.” It was more sudden than he’d planned, but it summed it all up. “I know.” Steve smiled and held out his hand, pulling Jason down beside him, close enough so their thighs touched. “I should have responded to all those apologies you sent a lot earlier than Friday, but I didn’t know what to say.” “The ‘thank you’ was nice because I knew you had received my message.” He was glad Steve hadn’t yet let go of his hand. That was surely a good sign. “I didn’t expect you to say more, because I knew we had to talk first.” “Like we’re doing now?” Steve looked hopeful. “Yeah. I want you to know how sorry I am for making the wrong decision. I left because I thought you’d be better off back inside the closet. I know now that I had no right to make that decision for you.” He hung his head.

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“You’re right.” Steve pushed a finger under his chin and lifted it, making him look into the deep brown pools of emotion that were one of his lover’s best features. “It wasn’t your decision to make, and we should have talked about it.” He nodded, feeling miserable yet again. “But, as painful as it was that you left, I understand now that you did it for the right reasons. Your apologies throughout last week were wonderful, and I think that we’ve been apart long enough now.” Steve let go of his chin, but he kept staring at the man he loved. “You do?” Thank God! “Definitely.” Steve nodded. “All I ask is that from now on we make major decisions together. That we talk about things, you know?” “Okay.” He could do that. “Does that mean we’re together again?” Steve nodded. “As a couple?” He held his breath. He’d be okay with hiding their relationship but that wasn’t what he wanted. “Yes.” Steve smiled. “I’ll take it one step further—I would like us to be a couple openly. Not public-kissing open, but as in our families and friends should know and we don’t have to hide it…even at work.” “Will that be safe for you?” He’d never forget the horror of those barbaric co-workers attacking Steve. Neither would Steve, of course, so the man was either being a daredevil or he’d come up with some sort of solution. “It should be.” Steve twined their fingers and held on. “My new employer has all kinds of anti-discriminatory policies that should protect me as much as possible at work.” “You have a new employer?” That would make not just Steve very happy. “It was one of the reasons I was so busy last week. I wanted to get this settled before talking to you.” Steve shrugged. “I wanted to be on equal footing with you.” “So, where do you work now?” “One of the biggest architect firms in Riverside has recently moved into a new building. They’re big enough now to need their own janitorial service, which includes cleaning the offices as well as washing windows. One of Tim’s friends from high school, a man named Kendall Gable, recently became a junior partner there and made the initial introductions.” Steve squeezed his hands. “So, you see, I’ll be much safer now.”

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And if that wasn’t the best news he’d got in weeks!

Steve watched relief spread across Jason’s face. All the effort of finding a new job had been worth it, just to see this. He’d missed Jason so much, and even though he’d been hurt and angry at the guy, he’d never stopped hoping they could somehow make up and get back together. Out in the open this time…well, as much as was safe. “So, you accept my apology?” Jason’s grey-green eyes were suspiciously bright. “Yes, I do.” Steve pulled his lover closer. With a huge sigh of relief Jason moved forwards. He came into Steve’s arms on a low moan and burrowed his face into Steve’s neck. Jason’s hot tongue licked a path up to his ear, then along his jaw. It made him shiver in delight. Maybe they could take the next step together now? He was certainly ready for more and the way Jason squirmed in his arms when he pulled him onto his lap made it look as if he wasn’t alone. Thank God! Jason looked into his eyes before he moved his head close enough they could feel each other’s breath. He slid his hand behind Jason’s head and pulled him in. As they melted together from groin to chest, he added their mouths and brought his tongue into play. Plunging inside Jason’s hot mouth was an adventure. His lover gave as good as he got, and their tongues were soon duelling in the best possible way. Jason pushed against his hardening cock with so much enthusiasm, Steve just knew that he wasn’t going to hold out very long. Not that he really minded, but he had been fantasising about doing more than kissing and rubbing off on each other. “I want you.” He’d pulled Jason off his mouth and looked straight into his eyes. Jason just nodded, eyes glazed with lust. “I mean, I really want to make love to you.” He swallowed, the implications of what he’d just said making him even harder than he’d been before. “I would like that very much.” Jason blushed. “I’ve fantasised about it since we played in the shower that night after going to that gay club.” “You have?” Steve bit his lip to stop himself from coming right then and there. The image alone was enough to bring him to the edge.

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“Oh, yeah. I loved it when you touched me there.” Jason’s blush deepened, making his pale skin almost as pink as the pretty nipples Steve couldn’t wait to lick and bite into their most excited state. “I want to do a lot more than touch you there.” A whole lot more. He’d even gone to buy lube and a new pack of condoms in the hopes they could get to this point once they’d made up. “And I would like that a lot. But there’s something else I want to try.” Jason put his forehead on Steve’s shoulder. Was he trying to hide? That was just too cute. “What’s that?” Steve pulled back and looked his lover in the face. “I’d like to show you.” Jason licked his lips. “Okay.” Steve lay back against the sofa and spread his arms. “I’m all yours.” “Oh, man” Jason grinned, jumped up and pulled off his shirt. “Let’s get naked first, so there are no interruptions later.” “I like the way you think.” Steve got up and held out his hand. “In fact, I suggest we take this to the bedroom, so we can play and nap when we’re done.” “Perfect.” Jason took his hand and followed Steve into his modest bedroom. The most expensive item he owned, other than his car, was his king-size bed. The wrought iron frame had cost a fortune, but he’d liked the look of it too much to resist. Jason’s obvious enthusiasm as he took it in, his gaze caressing the dark blue cover and lingering on the headboard, was very rewarding. He quickly pulled back the blankets, getting the bed ready for use. “This has potential.” Jason wiggled his eyebrows. “Man, you’re killing me already and we haven’t even started yet.” He grinned back and gave the imp a slap on his tempting bottom. “Hey!” Jason jumped from the shock and blushed. “First things first.” “Shit.” He had a hard time not blushing at the implications of that. “I believe we were going to get naked?” Jason wiggled his cute little ass this time, which was way better than wiggling his eyebrows. Both were cute, but seeing the man’s ass move like that made him want to touch. “Working on it.” He wasn’t wearing much and had followed the order within seconds.

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Jason just stood and stared until Steve snapped his fingers in front of his lover’s eyes to bring him back to reality. With a little squeal, Jason rushed forwards, pushed him onto the bed then fell to his knees—all in mere seconds. By the time Steve had recovered from the surprise lunge, Jason had his hand around his cock and was sliding it up and down in a maddeningly slow tempo. If the other man was out to drive Steve crazy, he was doing an excellent job. The pressure around his cock was exquisite. When Jason slid his hand down and didn’t move it back up again, he opened his mouth to let him know what he thought about that plan. Before he was able to utter the first word, though, Jason’s blond head moved forwards and, for a mere second, he thought he felt the man’s hot, soft tongue on his shaft. He didn’t move a muscle for fear of interrupting what he hoped was going to happen. It looked as if one of his most cherished dreams might come true. Jason’s head remained where it was, and there it was again. With the contact a bit longer this time, his lover’s tongue licked his aching cock from base to tip while Jason held his erection stable with a slightly trembling hand. As Jason gained self-confidence, the licking became more intense until finally he seemed to gather enough courage and enclosed Steve’s cock head with his lips. The suction that followed was heavenly and Steve was too keyed up to hold back. “Gonna!” He hoped it was warning enough, but Jason didn’t move back. There was no way he could stop his orgasm, he pushed up once and started coming. Shaking from the intensity of it, the visual of Jason still sucking his cock spurring him on, he came into his lover’s mouth for the first time. Jason’s eyes widened as the spurts of semen hit his throat, but he swallowed every last drop. When Steve stopped shaking, Jason pulled off, licked the rest clean as well then grinned when he finally looked up. “How was that for a beginner?” Jason winked. “Amazing.” Steve was still trying to catch his breath. “Best blow job I’ve ever had.” “Yeah?” Jason puffed up his chest a little. “Yeah. If you get any better at that I think you’re going to kill me.” He held out his arms and pulled Jason into his lap. “You need something?” Jason shook his head.

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“But you’re still hard.” His hand strayed towards the leaking cock. “I want to come when you’re inside me.” Jason smiled. “I’ve been dreaming about it for so long, I can’t wait to see what it’s like.” “I don’t want to scare you here, but from what I’ve heard it can really hurt the first time. Not that I want to cause you pain, but I’m just afraid that you won’t be able to enjoy it very much.” He swallowed, thinking that it almost sounded as if he wanted to try to talk Jason out of this. But he had to be honest. He didn’t want to hurt his lover for anything. “Don’t worry about it. We’ll see what happens. I want this too much and I know that you’ll take care of me if I don’t enjoy it as much as I think I will.” Jason put his hands on Steve’s cheeks, framing his face. “Ready to get going, lover?” Was he ever! “Turn onto your stomach for me.” He moved up, stretching to reach into the nightstand drawer and pull out the bottle of lube and a couple of condoms. Jason raised his eyebrows but complied quickly enough. Wiggling his tempting ass for effect, he settled in. Steve started by massaging his back, gradually moving towards the ass cheeks he so badly wanted to prise apart for a closer look. Patience. When Jason was relaxed and started to push his ass back into his touch, he knew the man was ready. Slicking a finger, he ran it into the tempting crack, making sure he touched the soft skin underneath with enough pressure so Jason would feel it. Those firmer touches had been the ones that had made him moan in the shower. It worked again. Within a few moments Jason was pushing up his ass in a clear invitation. Steve knew he’d have to be patient, but he was also pretty sure he would lose the ability to think clearly in a few minutes. It would be best to put on the condom now so he wouldn’t have to worry about it later. When he was sheathed, he moved up onto the bed and between Jason’s legs. He pushed them apart with his hands as he moved closer, holding on to make sure the other man didn’t fall over. The sight before him made his mouth water. The pert ass cheeks were spread, revealing the tight pink hole he intended to sink his cock into as soon as it was safe for Jason. His lover’s balls were dangling between his legs and his hard cock stuck out and almost touched the sheet. He just knew he’d have to lick all that tempting skin at some point in the very near

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future. Right now, both Jason’s pleading little sounds and his own painfully hard erection told him he needed to get on with it. Adding more lube to his fingers before pouring some straight onto Jason’s hole, he then started a careful massage of the entire area. Moving up from the perineum, across the wrinkled hole, and back again—he kept circling until Jason pushed back with a grunt, forcing his middle finger inside to the first knuckle. “Yes!” Jason arched his back, pushing his ass up farther. “More!” Steve wasn’t going to hurry and risk injury, but the enthusiastic response reassured him that Jason really wanted this. By the time he had three fingers sliding in and out of the loosened hole, Jason’s pre-cum had created a wet spot on the sheets, and he was definitely ready for more. When he pulled out his fingers Jason’s protest was immediate and very vocal. “Shhh, hold on, just give me a second.” He placed his throbbing cock at Jason’s entrance and pushed just far enough so his lover could feel him. “Yeah, that’s it, baby. Push back at your own speed. Take as much as you can without hurting yourself.” Jason raised himself up onto his hands for more leverage and pushed back, making Steve’s cock head pop into the tightest heat he’d ever felt. He bit his lip and fisted his hands to stop himself from thrusting inside as fast and deeply as possible. Jason groaned and tensed up for a second, increasing the pressure on his cock head to almost unbearable levels. Steve reached out, massaging his lover’s back to help him relax. After a while, Jason adjusted and pushed back again, taking almost half his cock in one go. “Man, that feels so good.” Jason panted, his head hanging low between his outstretched hands. “Come on, push in the rest of the way, make me take it.” Who could resist an invitation like that? He pushed forwards, still conscious of keeping it slow enough for Jason to be able to adjust. When he bottomed out it was his turn to moan. “This is going to be fast.” He was already at the edge, and he just knew he wouldn’t be able to hold back. “Please.” Jason wiggled his ass, making both of them yelp with a surprising increase in arousal. “Move!”

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His slow initial thrusts quickly gained depth and speed as his need for friction grew. He reached around Jason and took his stiff cock into one hand, jacking it in the same rhythm to which he was plunging into his lover’s clenching hole. It didn’t take long for Jason to break out in a sweat. Steve’s lover lowered his shoulders onto the bed and pushed back on every thrust, howling when Steve hit his prostate. Jason started shaking, and heat poured over Steve’s hand as the contractions forced him to give up control and fill the condom in long spurts of utter ecstasy. When they had recovered a little, he slid out carefully, did a minimal clean-up with a corner of the sheet then pulled Jason away from the wet spot and into his arms. Silence reigned as they caught their breath. Finally, Jason turned up his head and kissed him. This one was slow and tender, and held a lot of promise for the future. He let his hands wander over his lover’s body as he caressed him with his tongue. “Hmm, that was amazing.” Jason pulled back and smiled up at him. “If it was as much fun as it looked, I think I’ll need to try it from your end one of these days.” He grinned as Jason’s cock twitched against his thigh. “I do believe you like that idea.” “Who wouldn’t?” Jason snuggled closer. “I can’t wait to try absolutely everything with you.” “Including living together?” Steve bit his lip. How had those words just fallen out of his mouth? “Do you mean that?” Jason’s smile was positively angelic. “Yes. It may be a bit soon, and maybe I should have waited to ask you, but I would like that very much.” Never mind that most people would think they were two buddies sharing a place to live. They’d both know the truth. “Not too soon.” Jason shook his head. “We’ve been apart long enough.” “It was only a couple of weeks, does that even count as separation?” He smiled at Jason’s shocked look. “It felt like an eternity. And I didn’t even know if you’d ever forgive me. I never want to go through that ever again.” Jason tightened his grip on Steve and put his head on his chest. “Okay, no more separations,” he chuckled.

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Jason was turning out to be a wonderful lover, fun-loving and affectionate to boot. His future with this man beside him looked very, very good. Forgiving Jason had definitely been his best decision ever!

About the Author I’m a night owl who starts writing when everyone else in my time zone is asleep. I’ve loved reading all my life and spent most of my childhood with my nose buried in a book. Although I always wanted to be a writer, financial independence came first. Twenty-some years and a successful business career later I took some online writing classes and never looked back. Living and working in seven countries has taught me that there's more than one way to get things done. It has instilled tremendous respect for the many different cultures, beliefs, attitudes and preferences that exist on our planet. I like exploring those differences in my stories, most of which happen to be romances. My characters have a tendency to want to do their own thing, so I often have to rein them back in. The one thing we all agree on is the desire for a happy ending. I currently live in the United Kingdom, sharing my house with a vast collection of books. I like reading, travelling, spending time with my nieces and listening to classical music. I have a passion for science and learning new languages. Email: [email protected]. Serena loves to hear from readers. You can find her contact information, website and author biography at http://www.total-e-bound.com.

Also by Serena Yates Elemental Superpowers: The Cake Scrolls of Vengeance: The Magic Thieves New Horizons: Rescuing the Librarian New Horizons: Discovering the Actor New Horizons: Encouraging the Writer New Horizons: Supporting the Director New Horizons: Saving the Bodyguard Men of Riverside: Finding Elliot Men of Riverside: Rediscovering Adrian Men of Riverside: Understanding Mark Men of Riverside: Saving Zeke Mi Amore Collection: Max’s Italian Romance Stealing My Heart: The Magic Thieves

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