Doing Time

Doing Time By

Raine McIntyre Triskelion Publishing www.triskelionpublishing.net

Triskelion Publishing 15327 W. Becker Lane Surprise, AZ 85379 First e Published by Triskelion Publishing First e publishing November 2006 ISBN 1-933874-82-1

Copyright 2006 Raine McIntyre All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including photocopying, recording or by any information retrieval and storage system without permission of the publisher except, where permitted by law.

Ebook and cover design Triskelion Publishing.

Publisher’s Note. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, and places and incidents are a product of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to a person or persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is purely coincidental.

Dedication I’d like to thank my daughter Seanna, and my sister Brenda, for always telling me I could do it and then convincing me to take a chance. To my mother Barbara, who hates the stuff I write, but brags about it anyway. To my sons, Jeff and Roarke, who blush when they read my work, but read it anyway. To Chris for joining our family in spite of having met us first. A heart-felt thanks to Kristi, Gail (both of them), and all the staff at Triskelion Publishing for giving me a chance to fulfill a dream.

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Chapter One I want you to know from the outset that I really was minding my own business when Gavin singled me out making me his goal, target, raison d’être or school project, whatever the hell I was to him. To me, he was and always will be a big pain in the ass. And he’s the one person who understood me, healed me, and made eternity seem too short a time, so I cut him some slack…sometimes anyway. Time is the point of my story. Most people think time is linear, so they align themselves along the assumed track of their journey through it. They age, they organize, they lie down and sacrifice themselves upon the Altar of Time. All without ever knowing there’s any choice. Oh, I understood why they do it. I did it too–lived my life the way I understood things to be. I learned too much about the order or rather disorder of the universe into which God plunked us to do it any longer. On the surface, Gavin was the kind of guy women notice–sexy, sinfully gorgeous. He looked at me as though I were a candy bar; one he intended on thoroughly enjoying down to the last bite, then licking the wrapper clean of any remnant of sweetness before tossing it away. He made my teeth sweat. We ‘nice girls’ have sweet tooths, too. At least I used to be a nice girl. That was also before Gavin, but I’m not complaining. Nice is boring and wasteful. You squander years saying no to things that you later regret having missed doing while you could still enjoy them. We’re a long time dead, after all. I was forty-two when I met Gavin. My life was pretty uneventful until I reached forty– the year from hell. Besides turning forty, my husband left me, my mother died, my kids took off for college leaving me alone for the first time in my entire life, and I had to start using reading glasses. Yeah, that reading glasses thing was a total bitch. What made Gavin so appealing? His curly blond hair and sapphire eyes gave him a cherubic guise. But no way, no how, in any reality was Gavin anyone’s angel. Michael, Gabriel, and all their minions would have bust a gut, if they had guts, laughing at the absurdity of such a notion. Gavin was gorgeous; he was also as devious, cunning, and seductive as any vice. Still, with all his faults, in the eons of his existence as a Time Dancer, he had saved the world, or at least kept the fabric of time from unraveling a time or two. Yes, eons. That’s the thing about Time Dancers–they’re virtually immortal, with enhanced physical bodies at their peak of fitness. I haven’t seen one yet who looks a day over thirty. Time is set in frames. At each point along the continuum, human bodies are caught at a particular, three-dimensional location of length, width, and depth, for each specific point in time. Breach the frame and the 3-D location is no longer bound but free to exist at any of the infinite possibilities of eternity.

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So what? That’s exactly what I thought when Gavin first explained it to me. Then again, I really wasn’t listening to him; I was too busy staring at him. He could have made the man in the moon sound reasonable. I know I didn’t give a good goddamn what he talked about as long as I could keep staring into those eyes of his. Forever was in those eyes. We met at a party my best friend Cammy threw. My friendship with Cammy confused even me. Ethereal, blond and blue-eyed, Cammy appeared much more fragile than she was. She ruled her household and prominent social circle with her tiny iron fist. Even her real estate mogul husband James (never Jim) deferred to her wishes. Trust me, only Cammy could have gotten me to a party of any kind. “Come on, Charity, you’re becoming positively reclusive.” Cammy chewed her salad, the only food I ever saw her consume. I guess that’s why she remained so slim into middle age and I didn’t. “I really don’t go much for parties. You know that.” She gave me that pained, guilt-inducing stare and I reconsidered. After all, how bad could it be? I’d been divorced and very much alone (as in celibate) for more than two years and getting kinda itchy, if you know what I mean. However, a woman of a ‘certain age’, five-footfive and one hundred fifty pounds isn’t exactly in demand these days. Go figure. Besides, she said James had invited a client who was interested in the cabin my family was selling. My straight brown hair was far removed from its original chestnut color, but as close as I could come with a bottle. Those annoying little gray hairs taking over like weeds had necessitated the use of something. Surrounded by a plethora of lines, my eyes had retained their original chestnut shade, matching my original hair color. I’d always been able to find reasons to laugh and much prefer it to crying as a cathartic even if it did show on my face. My name is Charity Donovan. It used to be Charity Cramer, but I got my name back in the divorce. I was lucky to get that. Ed Cramer, my ex, was a shark–that unique subgenre of lawyer for whom hell has a special ring. Unlike natural predators, these sharks swim in schools, protecting their own in the ‘Good Ole Boy’ network. I had always worked with computers, so at least I wasn’t dependent on the good graces of Ed Cramer for my livelihood. Like any graces, good or otherwise, could be found in Ed. So I agreed to attend Cammy’s party for family, friends, and business acquaintances. Talk about strange bedfellows. Maybe I’d find Mr. Right in such an eclectic collection of people. Right, and as they say, “Maybe monkeys will fly out my butt.” I’d been at Cammy’s since early afternoon, ostensibly helping her prepare. We both knew I was more of a hindrance than a help. Cammy just wanted to check out, read ‘redo’, my hair, clothes and makeup. I figured she’d redo my body, voice and personality if possible. Luckily or unluckily, she couldn’t, so I got to leave those three things as they were. She kept saying she had someone special for me, someone who’d asked to meet me in person. I couldn’t imagine who’d even know me let alone ask about me, but Cammy would only say that it was a client of James’ interested in the cabin. So, I spent the first half of the party anxiously awaiting Mr. Mystery Man. I should have known Cammy wasn’t one to be impressed with anyone ordinary or at least no one who would actually be suitable for dating me. Someone who wouldn’t intimidate

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me. Someone within a decade of my age. I really should have known. I did notice Gavin right away, but then so had every other female in the place. For some reason, though, he singled me out. He stared and I tried to pretend I didn’t see him since I didn’t really figure he was looking for me. But I’d never felt such a physical pull to another person, let alone a stranger. When he made a beeline for me, I turned to see who his target might be, but I stood alone. Me? Was he blind? Lost? Crazy? Fascinated, I watched the Adonis approach. This could not possibly be the man. Silly me for thinking that after thirty plus years of friendship, Cammy might actually know me and the type of man I’d be comfortable with. He stood about a foot taller, outweighed me by about seventy pounds, and could not have been more than thirty years old. The blue of his suit reflected and intensified the azure of his eyes. His smile wiped every bit of data from my buffer. That’s Computerese for I stood there frozen in place like the empty-headed moron I’d become, and gawked. “Charity?” “Uh-huh?” He tilted his head to the side, a puzzled frown on his face. “Are you okay?” “Uh-huh.” His cocky, knowing smile disturbed the butterflies in the pit of my stomach. I just hoped they didn’t take flight–taking my dinner with them. “I have a proposition for you. Do you have a few minutes?” Okay, a proposition, the cabin, now that made more sense. Still, I seemed to have lost my ability for coherent thought. “Uh-huh.” He laughed outright this time. “I wish all women were as obliging as you. How about out here?” He indicated the terrace. Not wanting to be too repetitive, I switched it up a little this time. “Okay.” We strolled out onto the terrace. “Do you know anything about Einstein’s Theory of Relatively and Time Travel?” I blinked at the non sequitur. Einstein? “What am I saying? Of course you do.” “Einstein?” For some unknown reason I’d read Einstein’s discourse just last week on time relativity. You do a lot of strange things when you’re bored, but what did that have to do with a cabin purchase and a hot young man, who, by the way, had to be more than a decade my junior? “Yes, Einstein. His theory on time folding on itself and worm holes, the whole thing on Relativity.” I think I blinked at him, which he took for a sign of intelligence or interest or something, because he continued talking about Time, The Universe, and Everything. Spellbound, not with his ramblings but with the way the muted lights shone off his curls and highlighted the ocean depth color of his eyes, I remained silent watching his full lips move and dreamed of kissing them. Boy, it had been awhile. His lips stopped moving and I looked into his eyes. He considered me, not with curiosity at my mute fascination, but with a burning intensity I couldn’t quite identify. It sent

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frissons of excitement down my spine to settle low in an area that hadn’t seen any action for quite a while. He slowly raised his hand to my face, lightly caressing my cheek. “Me, too,” he purred and I fancied that he felt the same pull I did. He lowered his hand visibly shaking himself and pulled on a polite but distant façade again. “So what do you think?” “Think about what?” He sighed and started his speech again, but stopped seemingly considering a different tact. He smiled, something that really should be illegal around the female population considering how lethal it was. “You know, my house is much quieter and more conducive to private conversation.” “It is?” “Oh, yeah.” He leaned against the half wall surrounding the terrace onto which we’d wondered. “Most definitely. I can guarantee that we can discuss my proposition uninterrupted.” “Proposition?” “Yes, my proposition and anything else we’d care to discuss.” He straightened and moved closer holding out his hand. I took it. His hand engulfed mine and he pulled me slowly but firmly toward him, stopping when only inches separated us. I stared down at our clasped hands. “Come with me?” I looked up into his eyes and nodded. He smiled at me again, pleased. I smiled back, pleased that I’d pleased him. Putting his hand against the small of my back, he started us toward the exit. It never occurred to me at the time that no one knew, including me, where I was going and with whom. What did occur to me was that the heat branding his hand into my back could be addictive. I swore I could feel each separate finger of that hand and that I never wanted him to remove his hand or his fingers from my body. Cammy crossed the terrace where we’d left the house directly into our path on the terrace. “Oh, good, you two have met.” I, of course, just stood there, my mouth open in its new normal position, and blinked. Gavin answered for both of us, “Charity and I were just leaving to get better acquainted.” Why I chose that moment to muster some lucidity I’ll never know, but I did, so I asked, “Uh, who are you?” Gavin laughed, smooth to the end, the fastest thinker on two feet. “Did I forget that little detail?” Naturally, I answered, “Uh-huh.” “My name is Gavin Carpenter.” He shook my hand then returned his palm to the small of my back. “Pleased to meet you. Now that we know each other, let’s go get better acquainted.” “Okay.” Sanity and good sense had deserted me again.

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We continued past a dumbfounded Cammy, Gavin again filling any silence with a technical discourse on Time and everything you never wanted to know about it. I went along with him, not contributing anything to the conversation…or monologue. We walked down the sloping driveway of James and Cammy’s comfortable Scottsdale home. Though only March, the temperature was an unseasonably warm eighty-five degrees during the day and sixty degrees now. Spring flowers had long since bloomed, unaware that Phoenix, of which Scottsdale is a suburb, always has one last winter hurrah during March, dropping temperatures and stripping blossoms. We reached the end of the drive, and the glow of the artificial lighting that lined the concrete. Gavin kept walking toward a silver Dodge Viper, but I’d stopped at the end of the walkway, self-preservation again making an appearance, but he had yet to notice. He unlocked the car doors and turned, finally noting my absence. “Charity?” “What do you want with me, Mr. Carpenter?” “Gavin, please.” “Okay, Gavin, what do you want with me?” He laughed and said somewhat cryptically, “You should see the strength of your aura. It’s the darkest red I’ve ever seen.” “My what is what?” Okay, good looks, even really good looks only go so far. “It’ll take too long to explain. Just come with me and I’ll clarify everything.” “Gavin, what do you want with me? Is this even about the cabin” He sighed and walked back to the driveway, but made no move to touch me. “I’d really like to go into depth about that, but it would be so much better away from other people.” “Better for whom?” Gavin’s smile formed slowly this time, a hint of admiration in his eyes. I felt like a puppy that had learned a new trick, or maybe an old dog. “Ah, yes, for whom.” He moved to the split-rail fence bordering the driveway and perched sideways on the top rail studying me. “Well, that’s complicated, but you could say just about everyone.” “So, are we ending World Hunger or Nuclear Proliferation? Is the cabin going to house the homeless?” “Actually we’re saving time.” I was beginning to wonder if he wasn’t a gorgeous fruit and nut cake. Too bad, but just my luck. “What are we saving time doing?” His eyes never left mine, not a trace of a smile touched his face. “No…big ‘T’ Time. We need to save ‘Time’.” He never cracked a smile though his expression was one of amusement as he watched me furtively back away from him toward the house. “I see. Well, I sorta have other plans today. Maybe we could save ‘Time’ next week.” I’d made it halfway up the sidewalk when he pushed away from his seat on the fence

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and sighed, “I knew any match for me would never come quietly, but for a while it looked like it might be a little easier than this.” Emotionless, he stalked toward me. I turned to flee, but he was at my back, his arm around my waist before I’d made it two steps. I opened my mouth to scream, but found myself unable to emit even a squeak past the pain in my midsection. “Charity, I know you’re frightened, but I’m not going to hurt you. There’s just no time to waste.” He sounded sincere, but he was very wrong. Oh, I had been frightened, but now I was pissed. Dammit, it hurt. I clasped his pinky and pulled bending back his little finger at the same time I stomped heavily on his instep–a move I’d learned in self-defense class. “Dammit! You vicious…ouch, shit, that hurt!” My words exactly. Gavin hopped on one foot and shook his abused left hand. Again, I turned to run, but he snagged my dress in his right fist and pulled me toward him. He got me close enough to snake an arm all the way around me. He slung me onto his shoulder in a fireman’s carry, my stomach painfully balanced over him. Being the female that I am, my first and totally useless thought was how embarrassed I was to have him lift me. One hundred fifty pounds isn’t exactly light. But that was hardly the most important thing here, was it? Next, I noticed an absence of sound and movement. We were on our way to his car. I raised my head and looked around, forgetting for a moment to try to scream. The birds flew in the late afternoon dusk frozen in mid-air like puppets on invisible strings. Guests at Cammy’s party, drawn by our argument, had stepped onto the terrace. Like mannequins, they stood frozen in mid-conversation. The pain in my middle increased and burned. It radiated throughout my body beginning in my gut. I forgot screaming, kicking, or anything else, dumbfounded as the world lay frozen in mid-action as we passed. “You’ll feel better when we return to the normal time flow.” I gave his words only a momentary thought. The burning pain took all my concentration. He set me down in the car on the passenger side as a wave of dizziness spread throughout my body like the ripples across a pond. The pain in my stomach grew and traveled into my head. I turned toward Gavin to ask him what was happening when everything faded into darkness then…nothing. ***** I don’t know how much later I came to, but light shone around the shades of windows in an unfamiliar bedroom. Completely naked, I was tucked under the sheets and comforter of a strange bed. Putting first things first, I rose and wrapped the coverlet around me, heading for the facilities in the adjoining bathroom. A terrycloth robe the color of Gavin’s eyes hung on the back of the bathroom door. The events of the previous evening, at least I thought it was the previous evening, came crashing back setting the ache in my head pounding at my temples. I tried the bedroom door, but it was locked, of course. Rubbing my temples, I moved to

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the foot of the bed and sat trying to relieve the pain and form a workable escape plan. It wasn’t long before I heard steps outside the door and rose to face whoever entered. Keys jangled and hit the wood outside the door as the ancient brass handle rattled and turned. The door swung heavily inward admitting Gavin and a food tray. He paused when he saw me and smiled. He had replaced his elegant dress clothes of the previous evening with a black, metallic jumpsuit whose fabric seemed to absorb the light around it and reflect it back with a life of its own. Or, maybe that was just Gavin. The material set off his tawny hair and midnight eyes like the frame for a classic painting. It was all I could do not to answer his smile with one of my own. “Good. You’re awake. I brought you coffee, plenty of cream and sweetener, orange juice, toast and scrambled eggs.” “Yeah, like I’m gonna eat or drink anything you bring me. What did you drug me with? Some kinda date rape roofie drug?” He chuckled and moved into the room setting the tray on the table next to the bed. “I have never drugged anyone. Especially not with any date rape roofie drug.” “Then why did I pass out, huh? I never pass out.” I included the entire room with a sweeping gesture. “By the way, where am I? And why am I here? Where are my clothes? What time is it? For that matter, what day is it?” He folded his arms over his chest and leaned back against the door, watching me. Impatient, I ground out between clenched teeth, “Well?” “My turn now?” Sarcasm is not an attractive trait. I curled both hands into fists longing to slam both into his condescending grin. “I’d like to know where and what day and time it is. Then I’d like to know how I got here.” I paused, checking to make sure he was listening to me. “But most of all, I want to know why.” That smug grin still attached to his face, he answered, “You’re in a spare bedroom in my home, about eight hours after you left your friend Cammy’s. As for how and why…” He shrugged. “A time freeze shift is always…disorienting at first, but you’ll get used to it. Combined with your panicking, it was no wonder you passed out. There were no drugs involved. Your breakfast is perfectly safe.” I snorted and folded my own arms across my chest as I faced him. As badly as I needed coffee and as good as it smelled, I still didn’t trust him. After all, besides sounding nuts, he had kidnapped me. “Listen, Mr. Carpenter, I don’t care what when and why anymore. As much as I’ve enjoyed your hospitality and our little chat, I’d like to leave now. So, if you’ll just return my clothes…” He sighed heavily, something he did a lot around me. “Raphael told me my match would be a match in every way; I just didn’t realize you’d be so pigheaded.” “Pigheaded? Pigheaded!” I felt the flush on my face like a sunburn as I clenched my fists and dug half moon divots in my palms with my nails. Who did he think he was? “Listen, Mr. High and Mighty Shifter or Hop, Skip, Jumper man, I didn’t ask to be brought here and I don’t want to stay.” I stopped ranting and frowned. “And who’s this Raphael guy?”

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His smile slowly grew as he watched my tirade. “God, you’re passionate.” He uncrossed his arms and stepped away from the door to approach me. Wary, I took a step back and hit the edge of the bed with the back of my thighs. He raised a hand and cupped my face, his thumb stroking my cheek. “We’ll do great things together.” I couldn’t help it. I laughed. He dropped his hand and smiled that boyish, impish grin that, in spite of everything, I had started to crave seeing. “Listen, Gavin, I don’t know if you have some type of older woman–Oedipus complex or what, but I’ve been through one hell of a wringer with my ex and bullshit just doesn’t go down as easily as it once did.” He laughed. “Despite that lovely visual, I swear I’ve told you nothing but the truth,” he raised his right hand palm toward me in a mock Boy Scout salute, “so help me God.” He lowered his hand and smiled. “I’m actually much older than I look.” He raised his hand to my face again and stroked my cheek. “Besides, what I see when I look at you is much deeper than even you can see.” I jerked my head back and he lowered his hand, straightening. “Yes, Raphael told me it would be like this.” He studied me a moment longer. “I just thought or hoped that maybe…” He shook his head and started for the door stopping to add, “There are clean clothes in the top drawer of the bureau and in the closet. I’ll be back in half an hour to bring you to see Raphael, my…supervisor.” He started to turn, but stopped and faced me again with that boyish grin. “I’d drink that coffee if I were you. You’re going to need it. Besides, what do you have to lose?” “Gavin?” He waited, watching me patiently. I blushed. “Why did you take my clothes?” “Well, we wouldn’t want you to leave before we had a chance to talk to you, now would we.” “Oh.” He started to leave again and I stopped him. “Who…um…undressed me last night?” He grinned and turned, leaving without another word. Well, I guess that was an answer of sorts.

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Chapter Two I quickly donned the underclothes and funky metallic-looking jumpsuit like the one Gavin had worn that morning. A hidden zipper ran from the neckline down to below the belly button. I did like the slimming black color, though. My head felt funny and ached enough that I knew I’d need the coffee to deal with whatever came next. I took a chance on my gut feeling, no pun intended, that Gavin meant my no physical harm…yet. Note to self: kick the caffeine habit before one way or another it kills me. I scarffed down the food since I’d been too nervous to eat yesterday, and brushed my teeth with a still-sealed toothbrush I found in the bathroom. True to his word, Gavin returned in exactly thirty minutes. I had just finished exploring the room for my belongings, such as my cell phone and my illegal but useful mace, so I suppose I was as ready as I’d ever be. Gavin raised a single eyebrow at the strewn contents of the room. “Find anything?” “I didn’t really expect to.” I walked out the door ahead of him. “Come on. Let’s get this over with.” He stepped aside to let me pass. “By all means.” I descended the staircase to the right of the bedroom door. Each creak of the hardwood floors betrayed the house’s age. Matching the plank flooring, the wood paneled walls glistened and smelled of fresh polish. Indirect lighting and a large skylight relieved the heavy darkness created by so much woodwork. An oriental runner in mostly reds and blues bisected the stairs. Landscapes and portraits of similar style graced the walls along the descent. Busts and other small sculptures sat here and there in recesses in the walls. The bottom of the staircase opened to a large living room and branched in opposite directions. Three green leather upholstered chairs clustered in front of an unlit fireplace. Other furniture populated the space, but that’s as far as I noticed. A tall, powerfully built, dark-haired man sat in the chair directly facing us, sporting a metallic jumpsuit similar to Gavin’s and mine. Maybe they were some weird cult, like a Star Wars re-enactment club or something. Raphael’s eyes were arctic blue, so light they were nearly clear. Eerie! He reminded me of ‘The Big Bad Wolf’. With his ancient eyes in stark contrast to his youthful body, I was certain he could see right through me. This would not be someone you’d choose to mess with…unless you’re me. He rose as we approached his mannerisms more in keeping with someone twice his age. He couldn’t be more than thirty. This was Gavin’s supervisor? He extended his right hand in greeting. “Ms. Donovan, I’m delighted to meet you.” I laid my hand in his and he covered it with his left, doing one of those smothering type shakes. The kind that says how really happy he is to meet you and how you can depend on him, a used car salesman kind of shake. “Call me Raphael.” He paused and smiled. “I’m much older than I look.”

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I’m sure I blushed redder than my aura that Gavin kept talking about. I hadn’t said anything, but it was what I had been thinking. I looked at Gavin and he shrugged and smiled, sitting down in a chair at the end of the three leaving only the chair in between him and Raphael for me. Raphael finally released my hand. “Won’t you please be seated?” he asked gesturing toward the only remaining seat. I perched on the front of the massive chair, ready to flee if given half a chance. I looked between the two men and didn’t figure I’d be given much of a chance–not even half of one. “Sooo, Mr. Raphael…” “Please just Raphael.” “Okay. So, Raphael, what the hell am I doing here?” Gavin snickered and Raphael grinned broadly. “You’re right, Gavin, she’s a perfect match for you.” He frowned. “She is going to be difficult, though, isn’t she?” “Going to be? Look at her aura and she hasn’t even been taught anything yet.” Again with that aura thing. “Now wait just a doggone minute.” I rose and Gavin rose with me. Raphael remained seated observing us as if we were some kind of amusing toys. “I didn’t ask to come here and I sure as hell don’t want to stay.” My hands on my hips by now, I glared at Raphael and then at Gavin. “One of you had better start talking and tell me what I’m doing here.” I folded my arms over my chest, my foot practically tapping in impatience. “Well?” I waited, then added when the thought occurred to me. “Hey, you’re not aliens are you? Don’t tell me I’ve been abducted by aliens.” “Uh, no, I assure you that we’re no more alien than you are.” Gavin snorted at Raphael’s words, but Raphael simply ignored him. Raphael smiled and gestured toward the chair I’d vacated. “Please, Ms. Donovan, sit down. I’ll do my best to answer all your questions.” Peeved, I sat with my arms still crossed and waited for Raphael to continue. Gavin had crossed to a window on the other side of the room and stood staring out, his hands clasped behind his back. Raphael folded his hands together in his lap and steepled his index fingers, tapping them against his bottom lip his eyes fastened on mine. He stopped and said, “First, you may have noticed Gavin’s peculiar abilities.” Upon hearing his name, Gavin turned toward us and raised a single eyebrow after Raphael’s ‘peculiar’ statement. I looked over at Gavin and he caught my eye. After a few seconds, he shrugged and turned back to whatever fascinated him outside the window. I turned my attention back to Raphael. “I noticed.” “It’s called Time Dancing and Gavin ‘Steps Out’ better than anyone else…ever.” Gavin remained facing the window. “Steps out of what?” “Time.” “What?” Gavin sighed and turned back to face us again. “You ‘Step Out’ of Time when you Time Dance. It’s like stepping off a spinning Merry-

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go-round. Everyone on the Merry-go-round keeps spinning, but you don’t go with them. Your frame of reference has changed. In Time Dancing you’re no longer bound by any time frame of reference and move unbound between or within frames…sort of.” “Sort of?” “Most people think time is linear....” blah, blah, blah, “frame of reference....” yada, yada, yada. I won’t bore you, at least no more than I already have, with the same technical jargon. Suffice it to say that I’m not stupid, and being in the computer field, I do have a nodding acquaintance with theoretical mathematics, but my eyes started glazing over. I once nodded off in a college class and nearly fell out of my chair. This was worse. I actually started a list in my head of Gavin’s features while listening to his lecture. I told myself that I might have to identify him to authorities later. He bore a faint scar along his right cheek and a bump ruined the perfect slope of his nose. Altogether, it was the most beautifully imperfect face I’d ever seen. I doubt that even the passing of a couple decades could remove my fascination with it. “Ms. Donovan?” My attention snapped to Raphael. “Uh-huh?” Raphael laughed. “The science lesson is over for now. I asked if you had any questions so far.” Gavin had returned to his vigil in front of the window. “Is there going to be a test?” Raphael laughed again. “Not immediately.” “Good. When do I get out of here?” Gavin, his back to us, shook his head telling me his feigned disinterest was…well, feigned. Raphael, however, seemed undaunted by my attitude. He stared at me, but spoke to Gavin. “She is a perfect match for you. I’m sure she’ll give you every bit as much trouble as you gave me.” Gavin didn’t answer or comment, but with his back still to us, he silently gave Raphael the finger. Raphael just laughed and turned his attention back to me. “Where was I? Oh, yes, I’m afraid you’re to be our guest for awhile.” “Well, that just isn’t going to work for me, Raphael. I have a job, family and friends who will start to wonder about me, and by the way, they saw me leave with Mr. Science Guy over there. I do have a life, such as it is. It may not be exciting, but it’s all mine.” “No one will wonder about you. To them, the party hasn’t even happened yet. By the time it does, everything will be worked out and come together, be woven, as it were, into the correct fabric of time and space.” I sat back in my chair and stared at Raphael. I know my mouth had to have been hanging open, because I shut it a few minutes later. I wondered why Rod Serling had invited me to this little soiree in the Twilight Zone and how I was going to get out of it. ”Okay. Well, I’m sure you guys believe you, ah, step around time…” “Step Out,” Raphael corrected. “Yes, right, Step Out of time, and I’m really not sure just exactly what I saw and

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experienced, but what you’re telling me is more than a little hard to swallow. I mean no one can really control time.” Raphael remained unmoved by my disbelief. “You don’t believe the evidence of your own eyes?” I smiled. “Now, Raphael, we’re both sophisticated enough to know there’s more than one explanation for what I’ve seen. You guys could be like David Copperfield or better yet, Penn and Teller. The last time I took someone at face value, I ended up married to the Antichrist for twenty-two years.” Gavin laughed. “And you thought she might be difficult.” Raphael frowned at him. “You’re not helping.” To me he replied, “I know you find all of this difficult to…um…comprehend,” “I’m not stupid, Raphael, I comprehend just fine. I just don’t happen to believe it, or rather, I don’t buy your explanation.” Raphael stiffened and Gavin chuckled as he approached me. He raised his hand to my cheek again, something he seemed unable not to do…a lot. “What exactly would convince you that we’re telling you the truth?” I could feel that headache returning along the back of my head and neck and a different kind of ache spreading elsewhere. I wished again that he didn’t have that affect on me. It was disconcerting to say the least. “Yeah, well, I’m not sure there would be anything. After all, most any scene could be staged.” I paused, thinking. “Can we go back and see my mom?” Gavin shook his head sadly. “No, Charity. You couldn’t see any part of her life after your conception. And you’d never be satisfied that it wasn’t a trick if you couldn’t talk to her. Talking to your mother would be too risky. You might inadvertently say something to affect the future. We can’t risk letting you screw up your own future.” I didn’t see why not. I’d done a great job all by myself of messing up my past. I crossed my arms. “Then I guess we’re at an impasse.” Gavin watched me steadily for a moment and strangely enough, Raphael watched Gavin. After a long pause, Gavin smiled and said, “I believe I have a solution. I’ll Step Out with you to a scenario you know we couldn’t possibly have staged, but also one you’ll easily recognize.” “Where’s that?” Gavin didn’t answer me, but glanced at Raphael. “Rafe?” Raphael nodded and Gavin calmly approached me. Something in his determined expression warned me that this might not be all that much fun. My head throbbed and I stood, pressing and rubbing my fingers at my temples. I’m not quite sure exactly where I planned on going, just somewhere else. Before I knew it, Gavin had me around the middle making my destination moot anyway. He pulled me tightly up against his body, his hand and arm firmly against my stomach. Before the burning began again, I made two remarkable observations. First, Raphael had remained in his chair his elbows resting on the arms his gaze dispassionate, merely observing us. Second, Gavin had a hard-on pressed up against my rump. Seems I wasn’t the only one affected that way.

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***** In a strange way, I was flattered. It had been years since I’d had that affect on anyone. Unfortunately, the burning in my middle increased and became unpleasant chasing all other thoughts from my mind. Multi-colored lights flickered in front of me like remnants of colorful flash bulbs. As abruptly as it had started, the burning and the light show stopped. We were no longer in the house, but outside on a grassy hill, a kind…of…knoll. A grassy knoll? Ohmigod! Everywhere people were dressed in clothes reminiscent of an earlier time. A time when I had been too young to care about anything but my next bottle and having my diapers changed. Gavin supported me around the middle, his erection still pressed firmly against my back. I leaned into him and he brought his other arm up to hold me close, my head tucked under his chin. He whispered, “Just watch, Charity. Try not to react strangely.” Strangely? How did one usually act while watching a Presidential assassination? The crowd surged forward before I could ask, people shading their eyes and pointing up the street. A midnight blue convertible came into view bearing the august pair seated in the back seat, the woman in that ridiculous pink pillbox hat. They waved at the crowd. “Stop it, Gavin!” He didn’t pretend to misunderstand. “No, Charity. We’re not here for that. The Time Continuum has to play out as intended to keep fate on track. We can’t change anything without changing everything, tearing the fabric of Time completely apart. Just observe.” I felt him kiss the hair at my temple, and I swear he sniffed my hair. Weird, huh? At that moment, though, I could only watch transfixed in horror as the surreal events of November 22, 1963 in Dallas, Texas played out in front of us. I cringed as the shots rang out and the crowd stirred, not comprehending at first what had taken place. Screams penetrated the sultry afternoon air. I choked back a sob knowing the shots meant the end of a country’s innocence. Gavin rocked me back and forth gently. “Shhh, it’s okay. These events happened a long time ago.” The sparkling lights appeared at the same time the familiar burning started. Parts of me clenched against the pain, lessening the intensity. If I concentrated, I could make the sensation negligible, sort of like labor pains. I guess, in a way, they’re a lot alike–each a passage into a new world. ***** We returned to the living room where we’d started. Raphael still sat in his chair, his position unchanged, still every bit the enigma. Gavin held me close, his erection even more pronounced. Ambivalent about my

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feelings concerning Gavin and not wanting to be even more confused by his feelings or at least his reactions to me, I attempted to slip away from him. His embrace only tightened. “You can let me go now, Gavin.” “I could, but I won’t.” “I’m not going anywhere.” “No, you’re not.” I tugged again, tentatively trying his hold, only half-heartedly trying to break free of his embrace. “Gavin,” Raphael warned, “you don’t want to rush things now, do you?” “I thought that was the point. Or did I misunderstand the part about time being of the essence?” Raphael frowned and leaned forward, his tone that of a parent patiently trying to convince a recalcitrant child to behave. “She has a choice, Gavin, at least about when, at least for a short while yet.” He leaned back into his chair and relaxed. “You haven’t trained all this time, watched and waited centuries to simply scare her off, have you?” Gavin stiffened and released me reluctantly, his tone stilted and perhaps a touch rueful. “Until later then.” I turned toward him and he bowed slightly his manners strangely anachronistic, and made his way back to his window, his hands again clasped behind him. Odd, but I felt even more alone. I turned to Raphael. “Who are you guys and what does it have to do with me? Raphael remained silent, those spooky eyes of his raising the hair on the back of my neck. So, I bluffed–a whistle in the dark. “Look, Raphael, I don’t have an Irish name for nothing. Trust me, I have a bitch of a temper and you’re really starting to piss me off.” Raphael raised his eyebrows at my empty threat. After all, what could I do against men who could step through time? “Tell her, Raphael.” Gavin never even turned around. “She needs to know.” “Yes, she does.” Raphael seemed to gather his thoughts, perhaps searching for the best way to handle me. He looked up. “Please, Charity, sit down. This will take awhile.” He called me Charity and not Ms. Donovan. Uh, oh. I sat and watched him, looking for telltale signs of his mood and, better yet, his veracity. Raphael began, “The Creator of the universe and all those existing within and without,” I started to ask about that ‘without’ part, but Raphael raised his hand, preventing me from interrupting. “The Creator is pure good, in whom no evil can be found. The opposing force– Satan, the Devil, or whatever you choose to call it–is pure evil, in which no good can be found.” I did interrupt now. “This sounds like Sunday school, but you don’t look like any preacher I’ve ever seen.” Raphael’s grin, reminiscent of all the boys your mother warns you about, appealed to a part of me I didn’t care to investigate any further. Somehow, it just didn’t seem appropriate, like lusting after the parish priest. “I assure you, I’m no preacher.”

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Gavin snickered again, but remained facing the window. Raphael continued, his expression…expressionless. “Order decays into Chaos, the natural progression of things. Evil attempts to corrupt, to defile everything before its time. One of those things is Time. Even time frames erode eventually. Time Dancers repair the wear and tear on them, the rifts. ‘A stitch in time saves nine’, you know.” “He’s been using that one since Ben Franklin said it.” Gavin had joined us again. I saw him peripherally and glanced briefly at him. He stood a little to the rear and left of my chair, his arms crossed, but his posture alert. I guessed he was there to prevent my bolting when I heard whatever it was Raphael had to say next. I decided to take the plunge and get it over with. “And this has to do with me how?” Raphael ignored my question and continued his soliloquy. “Normal rifts are fairly routine to repair. A single Dancer can repair them quickly and easily. However, every couple of centuries or millennias or so, Lucifer or Satan or the Devil, Evil gets it into his head to try to take out all creation in one fell swoop. “He concentrates all his minions and power against a single rift. Should he succeed in tearing a large enough hole, Time would unravel uncontrollably. Like a nuclear reaction, all atoms would be torn apart and scattered unpredictably. And, like a nuclear reaction, once the chain reaction begins, it picks up speed geometrically and soon involves everything and everyone. All creation would implode and explode simultaneously.” “Bummer.” What else could I say? Gavin snorted. However, I don’t think Raphael was at all amused. “To put it mildly. See, it’s our job as Dancers to see that Evil doesn’t succeed.” “Sounds like you have your work cut out for you,” I remarked. “I assume Satan is being naughty again and planning on giving it another try soon, right?” “That about sums it up,” Raphael agreed. “You are going to tell me eventually how this all has anything whatsoever to do with me, right?” Raphael considered me with his arctic eyes and I felt the cold seeping in. I knew right then that I wasn’t going to like this. He leaned forward in his chair, coming closer to me. I instinctively leaned forward to hear him better. “That’s where you come in. You and Gavin.” “Me and Gavin?” “Yes, you and Gavin. We need the concentrated force of a specialized energy to repair the rift that evil opens as soon as we detect it. If we’re too slow, it won’t be enough.” “Okay. You have a lot of these Dancing guys, right?” “Legions.” “So…why the hell am I here?” Raphael sat back again and asked, “Have you ever asked yourself if you have a soul mate?” “A what?” He shifted gears faster than a NASCAR driver. “A soul mate. Someone who fits together with you to make a union stronger than either of you alone–synergy, but greater than synergy–the antithesis of individual effort. Instead of adding the output of each of you, the total force produced is equal to raising the

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product of each output several powers.” “Uh, yeah. That’s a helluva lot more math than I want to do. I’d have to say a big N-O to the soul mate thing. If there’s one thing my Ex taught me, it’s that we come in alone, we go out alone, and we’re probably better off alone in between. Period. End of story.” Gavin piped up, “I warned you, Raphael.” Raphael frowned at Gavin and then at me. “You have a soul mate, Charity.” He used my first name again. Not a good sign. “Okay, well, we’ll just have to agree to disagree there, Raphael. Besides, what does a soul mate have to do with Satan, time rifts, and, most importantly, me?” Gavin spoke softly behind me, “Soul mates are needed to heal the rift. Not all the Dancers in the Universe will be enough, but the concentration of the specialized energy created by soul mates will. But these ‘special’ rifts require preordained healers.” An icy chill I felt to my bones seized me. I swallowed convulsively and whispered hoarsely past the growing lump in my heart, “They do?” Gavin moved closer and laid a hand on my shoulder. Whether to comfort or restrain me, I didn’t know, but his touch started a fire to melt the glacier around my heart. I looked at him, into those soul-stealing, forever eyes. “We’re soul mates, Charity. We’ll have to heal the rift, together. It’s our fate.” I had to go and ask, didn’t I.

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Chapter Three “Gavin you’re certifiable, you know that? We’re not married or dating or anything. We don’t even know each other. How can we be soul mates? Besides, I have other plans.” I started to rise, but Gavin’s hand on my shoulder prevented it. “Charity, I wish it were as easy to dismiss as simply certifying me.” He looked at Raphael. “My turn.” Raphael shrugged. “We’ll talk again, Ms. Donovan. I truly am sorry I couldn’t convince you with logic.” “W-W-What?” I stammered. Raphael finished, “It’s a shame really, but it does seem that all too often people base important decisions on the state of their hormones rather than rational thinking.” He smiled and added, “Try not to wear her out, Gavin.” Gavin scowled at Raphael. “Don’t be crude. Come, Charity, we have much to discuss and little time to do it in.” He extended his hand toward me. I stared at it a moment before taking it. Don’t ask me why I took it. I don’t know. I’d like to say I had a plan to lull him into thinking I was compliant, but I didn’t. I just went where Gavin wanted to take me. Seems I always did. He smiled as I stood, his eyes never leaving mine. Then in front of God and Raphael, Gavin lowered his head to mine and kissed me. The world dropped away. His hands started in my hair, holding my head up at a slant, the perfect angle for his mouth. My hands hung loosely at my side, and I moved them up to cover his. Warm and supple, his fingers held me tenderly, but I felt the leashed power they contained. Rising back slightly, he tasted me, pulling my bottom lip into his mouth and suckling it. I whimpered, anxious for more of something, an urge to crawl into his skin, to taste more of him. Still cupping my head with his right hand he slid his left around my waist and pulled me closer. The ridge of his erection pressed into my abdomen. I wriggled, rubbing my breasts against him, my nipples pleasurably throbbing. He groaned and I wrapped my arms around his neck my tongue jousting and entwining with his. He tasted clean and delicious, mint and cloves, a spicy combination, and I just wanted to eat him up. After all, I had wrapped myself around him like a tortilla with a chewy Gavin center. My pulse sped and I felt the pounding in my neck and chest and down much lower. His arousal drew an answering wetness between my legs and a visceral longing ache I needed to appease. The burning pain I’d felt before had changed to the sweet ache of desire. When I could draw a breath, the scent of warm, aroused male filled every pore out to my fingers and toes, chaining opposing forces of lethargic warmth and tingling excitement with me at the center. I felt I would die if I couldn’t fulfill this yearning, and yet the intense pleasure might very well kill me. I could have stayed there for hours just kissing. I’m not so sure I didn’t. All I know is by the time he drew away, I noticed that we were somewhere outside and that I’d draped

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myself around him. He didn’t seem to mind, even laughed at my efforts to extricate myself. I felt myself blush and avoided eye contact with him hoping he didn’t notice that too. Finally, I took stock of my surroundings and stood, gawking. “Hey, don’t look now, Toto, but I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore.” Gavin’s laughter told me he found me amusing in spite of my besotted behavior. I wondered how old you have to be to stop behaving and feeling foolish. Maybe you never get that old. Then again, maybe the joy leaves if you do. In any case, I had yet to lose either the foolishness or the joy. “So, Gavin, what exactly is it we’re supposed to do together?” “Let’s walk.” He grabbed my hand pulling me along with him. At least we weren’t on a grassy knoll again. “Hey, slow down there.” I pulled back, making him stop. He watched me impassively then picked up my other hand, too. ”We’re going to save Time, the Universe, and, by default, Everything. Sound like fun?” He dropped my hands and walked over to the hefty branch of a fallen tree that rested about three feet off the ground and sat on it, watching me. After a few moments, he patted the tree branch beside him, inviting me to share his seat. He cocked his head to one side and continued, “You know, I’ve seen all your life up to this point. Not always in order and some parts more than once.” He leered, just a little. “I especially liked Prom night.” I blushed remembering the night I lost my virginity. “Yeah, so did my Ex. Exactly how much did you see?” He sat there grinning long enough that I didn’t think he intended to answer, but he finally did. “More than your Ex and probably more than you.” “Pervert.” No sense worrying over what had already happened, what I hadn’t even known had happened. He just laughed. “Your thinking is certainly unique, definitely outside the box. You don’t really care what I’ve seen, do you?” “Would caring make any difference?” That set him off but good. He threw his head back and roared with laughter. I looked away embarrassed, but not sure why. After all, I already knew I thought a little differently than most people. Okay, a great deal differently than most people. I’ve tried all my life to be like everyone else or at least to understand everyone else, but I have never succeeded. Not even a little. It hasn’t been about whether I see the glass halfempty or half full, but because I wonder if it makes a difference what’s in the glass as to how you see it. It does to me. A slight breeze teased my hair and playfully flung a few strands across my face. For the first time, I noticed that our serene surroundings seemed absolutely devoid of any other human life. I tossed my head shaking the wayward locks away and walked to the tree to share his seat. Perching on the limb sidewise, I wiggled against the bark seeking a comfortable

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position facing him. He, too, turned sidewise in order to face me. “So tell me, Time Lord, why haven’t you seen anything in my life beyond today? I could use a few tips. God knows it’s got to be better than it’s been lately.” He watched me closely, his features again serious and answered, “I can’t see your future because from now on, for better or for worse, you and I share a future. Besides, futures are nearly impossible to see. Unlike the past, the future is influenced by choices in the present and constantly changes.” I looked off in the distance and wondered myself at my calm acceptance of the preposterous events of the last day. I guess I bought into it, but figured I might just wake up any minute to find that it had all been a dream. Hawks circled in the distance hunting their suppers in the fields below, their cries piercing the eerie quiet. Through the brilliant blue sky, low, stark white clouds floated over the verdant grasslands. The wind, heavy with moisture, had picked up speed. With the clean blue and gray of the skies and the copious wildlife, we couldn’t be anywhere near a city. At least not a modern one. I brought my eyes back to him. “So where are we now?” He smiled and scooted closer raising his hand to brush the hair off my face. “That’s it? I tell you we’re fated to be together from here to eternity and all you want to know is where we are?” “Well, I’d also like to know when if it matters any. It doesn’t appear to be near my time.” He threw back his head and really laughed again. I suppose it’s good when people think you’re funny, but it’s better if you actually mean to be funny. He treated me as you’d treat a precocious child – amused but superior. Gavin finally stopped laughing and raised his hand resting it against my cheek. “You really are amazing you know. I doubt I’ll ever be bored again. To answer your questions, though, we’re on the plains of Wyoming, mid-summer around 1870. There weren’t or aren’t many people around. I come here to think. You like?” “Very nice.” I hopped off the tree and brushed the bark off my rear. “Well, what’s first?” He left the tree too, and dusted himself off. “You train and learn how to channel power. Then we practice together. And finally we fight the bad guys and live happily ever after.” “Hmm. Sounds like a plan. How long do we have to train?” “At least six months. Conditions won’t be right for that long.” I skipped the ‘conditions’ part to ask about the six months. “Uh, Gavin? I’m not in…um…very good shape. Hell, I get tired walking a mile. I don’t think six months is going to do it. I’ll try, but maybe you could find another soul mate–a younger, fitter one.” He chuckled and cupped my cheeks, kissing me on the forehead. “You’re priceless. But don’t worry, Raphael takes care of that part. Be prepared for a treat. Your body has to be changed. You need a more resilient…model. You need the body you had at eighteen, your peak.”

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“Don’t we all?” “Well, in this case, that’s exactly what you get.” “Huh? Some kind of surgery? Wait. No surgery gives you an eighteen-year-old body, outside and inside. Do we take some kind of vitamins or magic elixir or something? Is there really such a thing? How is Raphael going to give me back my eighteen-year-old body?” “Well, it really isn’t a matter of giving you back your body, but more like freezing time in the exact moment you were at your peak and plucking out your body from that moment to prevent it from aging and deteriorating any further.” “Okay. But how does that body, uh, get here now?” “That’s just it. It doesn’t come to you. You go to it to make the second you.” “Second me? A clone?” “Not really. We capture two distinct time lines out of the infinite number of possibilities. You sort of jump forward with your enhanced body to the place on the new time line where the two threads separate while the ‘other you’ continues on the original timeline. Both of you retain the same memories up to yesterday at the party, but only the new you will have your memories after the moment we met on this time stream. The ‘other you’ will never meet me at the party, but will live your life after that point.” I know I stared at him for quite awhile. I remember thinking, “Yeah, that makes sense” while simultaneously thinking maybe I was the one who was certifiable. A thousand questions flashed through my mind, instead, I just asked, “So is that what you did?” “Yes, a very long time ago.” “But you don’t look eighteen.” He smiled. “My peak was at twenty-five. Besides, we always look older than our apparent chronological age. All our experiences and knowledge, just having lived shows on a person. Eyes are the windows to the soul, after all. After enhancing your body, we train like crazy.” “Why does Raphael have to do it? You’re a Time whatever,” “Dancer” “A Time Dancer. Can’t you do it?” “I can isolate the two lines, but I can’t bring you back here. We share a destiny. I could take you to right before we met, but it’s just too close to ‘now’. Two objects cannot occupy the same space at the same time. If we got caught in the same time frame as our other selves and it would be disastrous. The chance of creating a dissonance and as a result fracturing our time lines is too great.” He moved my hair, lifting it and caressing the back of my neck. “We need to return to Raphael now and get started.” Now came my favorite part, the kissing part. I’d have to ask about why it was necessary. Maybe later would be soon enough. Nah. He leaned in, but I stopped him with a finger against his lips. “I have a couple more questions.” He smiled and waited, slipping his free hand and arm around my waist to pull me closer. “Why am I not surprised?”

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“First, how old were you when you were changed and how long ago?” “I was nearly forty. Raphael removed me from Pompeii the night before Vesuvius erupted. And that’s really two questions, but for the sake of expediency, go ahead and ask your other question.” I stood there dumbfounded. “Almost two thousand years ago?” “What?” “Vesuvius erupted in the first century A.D., nearly two thousand years ago.” I kick ass at Trivial Pursuit. “I won’t ask how you know that, but yeah, a couple thousand years ago. So what’s your next question?” “Okay.” I hesitated. I guess I’d deal with our age difference later. “Why are you always kissing me? Is it part of the Dancing? Will Raphael have to kiss me to change me?” “He’d better not.” “What?” “Raphael won’t have to kiss you. As for me, I like touching you, kissing you. You’re my soul mate after all. Besides, Stepping Out is easier using our combined energies.” “You don’t even know me. We just met. Even if we really are soul mates, it takes a little longer than a day to develop a ‘touching’ kind of relationship. Even longer for a ‘kissing’ one.” “But I’ve known you all your life.” “Well, I haven’t known you.” “You will. Besides, you don’t seem to mind my touching and kissing.” He nuzzled my neck again, breathing deeply, inhaling my scent. “And you smell so good.” “Uh, thank you, I guess.” I had trouble keeping my train of thought. I looked at him, really looked at him. His deep blue eyes seemed at once ageless and vulnerable. I sensed the yearning hunger when he watched me and couldn’t help the immediate and instinctual reaction I had. I wanted to soothe and remove that vulnerable look and satisfy his hunger so he no longer yearned for anything or anyone. For the first time in my life, I sensed the missing pieces start to fit together and it frightened me. I didn’t want to need anyone. I didn’t want to want someone so much. I didn’t want to feel that helpless loss of control, but I knew that it was already too late. That my control was relentlessly slipping away, like sand through my fingers. I raised my hand to his face and he stilled as though he feared I would take it back if he moved. His cheekbones were high, his eyes large and widely spaced. His curls were the color of wheat and as soft as a child’s, giving him the perpetual look of a youth. He wore his hair just a little longer than fashionable, adding to his youthful good looks. He had such kissable lips, full bottom lip and bow-shaped upper lip, opening on even, white teeth. He had said he was from Pompeii, but I saw Celtic ancestry sculpting his features and nothing Italian or Mediterranean. I started to ask him about it, but he kissed me then and nothing else seemed quite as important. I wrapped my arms tightly around him and returned the kiss wholeheartedly. I just couldn’t seem to help it. Maybe I’d be able to figure out why later.

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***** “Gavin? Ms. Donovan?” “Unh, huh?” Gavin and I answered together. “You two seem to be getting along fairly well. I assume you told her everything, Gavin?” “She knows about the change.” “And?” “She agrees.” “You know that’s not all I’m asking.” “It’s enough for now. Have I been wrong yet?” He stepped back and scooted me toward Raphael. “You’d better get going. She’ll need recovery time.” By their short exchange, I knew there was something important they weren’t telling me, but that ‘recovery time’ thing caught my attention and pushed out other thoughts. “Hey, wait. Why will I need recovery time?” I moved away from Raphael, preventing him from touching me. “I assure you, Ms. Donovan…” Raphael began “Yeah, yeah. You’re always assuring me of something or other. And call me Charity dammit. Gavin, why will I need recovery time?” Gavin reached for me, but I stepped away from him too, not wanting the distraction of his touch. He ran a hand through his hair, looking at Raphael and back at me. Raphael answered, “Charity, splitting you into two separate time lines is…stressful, and just a tad painful. Well, not really painful, but a little uncomfortable.” I folded my arms over my chest and raised an eyebrow. “A little uncomfortable like having your teeth cleaned or a little uncomfortable like having a tooth knocked out?” Raphael shrugged and Gavin answered, “As I recall, probably more the later. However, you sleep for a day or so and you wake up feeling better than you have in years.” “And just how long is this uncomfortable part?” Raphael answered, “No time at all. Before you know it…” Gavin interrupted, “About an hour.” I relaxed. Hell, a toothache for an hour? Piece of cake. “Will my other self feel any discomfort?” “No, she continues on the same path uninterrupted. You, however, have to be pulled from the thread and your body will be enhanced. No light matter.” I uncrossed my arms and walked to Raphael. “Well, come one. Let’s get this over with.” Raphael shook his head and stepped forward taking my hands and looking into my eyes. “Now, Gavin told me I don’t have to kiss you to do this,” I remarked just in case he wanted to try anything funny. Raphael glanced at Gavin who shrugged and then looked back at me. “I bet he did, but as much as I’m sure I’d like the experience of kissing you, Ms. Donovan—”

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“Charity,” I corrected. “Charity, I do not need to kiss you to do this.” “Good.” Raphael’s eyes opened wider and he laughed. “That sounds suspiciously like an insult.” “No offense, Raphael, you’re just not my type.” “Now I know I’ve been insulted.” He pulled me closer and smiled. “I promise to be a perfect gentleman. Now close your eyes.” “Why?” “Gavin, does she ever do anything without questioning it?” “Do I?” He shrugged. “Why would she?” Raphael sighed. “I guess that would be too much to expect. Ms., uh, Charity, closing your eyes will help keep you from getting dizzy. Keep them open if you prefer.” “No, that’s okay. I just wondered why.” I closed my eyes and waited. The whole thing was over before it had really begun. I wasn’t sure what the big deal was. Maybe it’s different for everyone and then maybe it’s just the difference between men and women. You’ve heard the old saying about there being a lot fewer babies if men had to have them, right? The most uncomfortable parts were the memories. Bittersweet, I saw my life condensed into sound bites. My father and mother happily cooing over my bassinet, a memory I’d not known consciously gave me a different perspective on the people I’d never considered like other people. They were my parents. I never allowed them to be fallible human beings until I had no choice. The fights, the petty unreasonable accusations of divorce, my parents’ divorce had exposed their clay feet and forced me to face the insecurity of having ‘normal’ people for parents instead of people who could do anything, fix anything, keep my world safe. Later, my own divorce looked no better. Regardless of which of us had the majority of blame, there was plenty to go around. My children were full-grown by the time of our divorce, but the hurt I saw in their faces, something I’d been unable to see at the time, was every bit as painful as mine had been at my parents’ divorce when I was twelve. The inevitable loss of innocence hits all of us hard. If you’re ready, it can help you grow, be beneficial in fact. If you’re not, well…not so much. I watched my children grow up again, cringing at my failures with them and rejoicing again at the successes. Our children grow up and leave for lives of their own in spite of what we do or don’t do. My first words, first steps, first kiss, and the enormously embarrassing first sexual experience flashed before me big as life. The hurt, the joy, the sorrow and the ecstasy hurled through my brain at a dizzying pace. My father had died years earlier in a car accident. The funeral wasn’t any more fun the second time. My mother’s death hit me harder because of the closeness we’d always shared and my Ex’s timing in leaving me the same month. I cried for both of my parents again, sad

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that there never would be another chance to say anything. It’s never the things we do that produce the most regret in our lives, but the things we leave undone, unsaid. When my life had finished replaying, Raphael took me to my eighteen-year-old self. I barely recall the person I was then on the outside, but the person inside still existed in my middle-aged body. Strange how that works. Time, experience, and people change our behavior, but we’re really the same person all our lives. Wherever you go, there you are. A single moment of intense discomfort during the actual separation of the two time threads then nausea as we sped along the path taking us back to where we’d started made up the whole of my journey to my new self and my new life. Raphael held me tightly against him, murmuring reassurances as years literally flew by in a matter of seconds surrounded by a display of flashing lights and swirling colors. Odors and sounds assailed me faster and faster until I could no longer distinguish between them. Cramping in my lower abdomen grew uncomfortable but manageable. The noise and movement was a different matter. I heaved on Raphael’s shoes. He, of course, assured me that it didn’t matter. We returned to the living room where Gavin waited in his usual spot in front of the window. I heard him ask Raphael how it went, but I seemed unable to keep my eyes open for long. He took a step toward us and the room tilted. I saw the concern on Gavin’s face and felt Raphael pull me closer, supporting me on my trip to the floor. Gavin kneeled next to us and lifted me easily into his arms. “Oops! I don’t seem to be as heavy as I was.” Gavin’s voice held laughter. “No, you’re not. Let’s go to bed.” “I don’t know you well enough for that.” We’d already started up the stairs. Well, Gavin had started up the stairs carrying me. I was glad I didn’t weigh as much as the last time he’d carried me. “Don’t worry; you’re the only one going to bed. I’d never take advantage of a lady.” “Yeah, right.” Sarcasm just comes so naturally to me. He laid me on the bed and removed my shoes. “You know, Gavin, I wouldn’t mind if you wanted to stay with me while I fall asleep.” “You wouldn’t, huh? I guess I have a couple minutes to spare.” He covered me with the comforter. “Only a couple of minutes?” “That’s all it’s going to take for you to fall asleep.” I heard him walk to the other side of the bed and felt the mattress dip when he sat down. A few minutes later, two thuds indicated he’d removed his shoes. He crawled under the comforter and pulled me to him, spooning along my back, something I’d definitely missed in my single life. I sighed and settled against him. It felt so natural. For once, my sleep was restful and uninterrupted, in spite of everything. *****

Something was different. I sat up, without having to roll over first, without groaning, without pain. The sun was high and my bladder full. I hurried to the restroom and took care

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of things, noticing that Gavin had slept fully clothed the entire night next to me. He muttered a grumpy sentence about five more minutes then rolled over and fell back asleep. It registered that all my clothes hung off me, but I never liked staring into a mirror. I figured I knew what I look like; there was really no sense in belaboring the point. So when I dropped my pants and started the shower, it didn’t immediately occur to me to check myself out. I was too busy thinking about how goddamn hungry I was. I hadn’t been this hungry in years. And my head felt fuzzy, like waking after a long sleep, where dreams and waking reality intertwine and have to be separated slowly. I stepped into the warm water and soaped my hands preparing to wash when two thoughts came to me simultaneously. One, I was hungry but didn’t crave coffee. Two, the body I was washing was unfamiliar, mostly, yet hauntingly familiar at the same time. Sorta like a flavor you haven’t tasted in awhile that travels over your tongue and is swallowed before you have a chance to identify it. My hands froze and I looked down. Ohmigod! It was me at 120 pounds only more toned than I’d ever been, even at eighteen. I knew that they told me it would happen, but I didn’t really think it would happen exactly as they had said. I had a body I feared touching. It might have disappeared or turned back into the fortytwo year old, sagging, plump woman I’d been yesterday. Tentatively I touched it, first through the soap then in just water. Nothing disappeared. In fact, everything tingled, like new skin under a blister only without the pain. Nothing sagged, the skin firm over the muscle beneath it. I touched my face and my cheekbones stood out, the skin taut. I had a collarbone again and, miracle of miracles, hipbones that protruded farther than my gut. My paunch had disappeared back into the abdomen from which it had sprung so many years ago. The water had turned tepid, so I quickly washed my hair. I couldn’t help pausing, though, to run my fingers through the smooth locks. The elasticity of strong, healthy hair had replaced the dry, metallic feel of dyed locks. I examined the strands. Even wet they glowed with natural highlights. I turned off the water and grabbed a towel to wrap around my hair and another to dry my skin. I held the second towel in front of me and stepped out of the shower and over to the mirror. Anxiously I lowered the towel and caught my first look at the new shell I owned. It was indeed the body of my youth without the drawbacks–no acne, no raging hormones–just the fit, healthy glow of youth. I picked up the toothbrush I’d used the day before and spread a thick dollop atop the bristles. I opened my mouth and the stark whiteness drew my attention. Gone were the stains of coffee and age. The chip on my upper incisor had disappeared as well as the remaining wisdom tooth I hadn’t yet removed. I ran my tongue over my front teeth, top and bottom and felt the smooth as newly polished surface of my teeth even before brushing. I know you’ll think I’m crazy or crazier, but of all the changes to my physical body, the ones that meant the most were my hair and teeth…and of course not having to wear reading glasses any more. I must have spent five minutes reading the small print on the labels of every product on the bathroom shelves and the Newsweek magazine lying on the counter.

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I looked the perky body over a few times in the mirror, but it seemed apart from me, more a memory than an old friend. Because despite the beauty of youth, I had come to terms with aging and mortality–two conditions that no longer applied to me. I wrapped the towel around my torso and shook out my hair, leaving it wet. No way was I going to blow-dry a single strand. I had makeup available, but enjoyed not using any. Just as I finished combing out my hair, a determined knocking sounded at the door. I opened it catching Gavin in mid-knock, his hand raised to strike again. He looked me up and down. I hadn’t realized before how much I wanted his approval, but it was important. When he kept staring his hand still lifted in mid-knock, I turned around slowly. “So what do you think?” I asked. I took another look down my new, old body or old, new body, something like that and realized that modeling first thing in the morning in a towel might not be smart. He lifted my chin with the fingers of his knocking hand and engaged my eyes. He looked deeply, searching for something and smiled. “Still in there.” It wasn’t a question. Embarrassed, I looked away and strode past him into the room to search for clothes. “Of course I’m still in here. Where else would I be?” I had nearly made it past him when Gavin grabbed my arm and pulled me back in front of him. “You know, I don’t think I really got a good look at the new you.” He didn’t look at my body, though, but fastened his eyes on my face seeming fascinated with exploring every part of it. When he’d satisfied himself, his eyes came back to mine and he smiled. I couldn’t help but smile, too. He lowered his head and lightly kissed me. I forgot how little I had on and wound my arms around his neck pressing my full body length against him. I felt him chuckle against my lips a deep, satisfied male chuckle as he wholeheartedly wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me firmly against him. The towel around me slid down aided by Gavin’s roving hands. Only the press of our bodies together kept the towel from falling completely. I pulled back slightly lowering my hands down his sides to look at him. A burning intensity had replaced his playful smile. His eyes locked with mine. Slowly and deliberately, he pulled the towel from between us, held it out straight, and dropped it to the floor. I felt my nipples tighten and my belly clench in reaction as he raked his eyes over my body. He smiled, but the smile, predatory and carnal, did nothing to relieve the amatory tension running along my nerves and interfering with my breathing. He cupped my face and pulled me to him. Not knowing exactly what to do with my hands, I held his waist loosely as he slanted his mouth over mine. With an arm around my waist, he held me tightly against him, ran his fingers through my damp hair, and cupped the back of my head. Warm and inviting, like coming home, his lips tasted mine, making me feel wanted and desired. His hand fisted in my hair and the one splayed against my back held me secure, keeping me positioned against him so he could continue to explore my mouth and rub all my sensitive spots and his. He tumbled us back onto the bed, me on top, keeping us securely fastened together. I lifted my upper body, my weight supported by my hands against the bed on either side of

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him. He released my lips, but kept his arms around me, his hands securely fastened in my hair and around my middle. While I stared into his eyes, he slid his hand from my waist and down my back and thighs. The gleam in the blue forever of his eyes changed, flared into that look, the look that men get when they have no intention of going back, when releasing you will only come after they finish with you or at death. It had been years since I’d seen that look and even longer since I’d felt it flare from me. I didn’t want this and I couldn’t live without it. This was the point of no return–on one side sanity, autonomy, and on the other paradise. An insistent knock broke the spell. I looked over my shoulder at the door as though I wasn’t quite sure what it was. Gavin’s response was more colorful and succinct. “Fuck!” He released me and I scrambled off him and the bed, grabbing up my discarded towel and hurried to the bathroom shutting the door behind me. I listened at the door to muted voices and the distinct sound of the bedroom door closing. I grabbed the robe I’d worn the day before off the hook on the back of the door and pulled it on, belting it tightly. I cracked the door and peeked through the small opening. The room was empty. Someone had left me a new jumpsuit and underclothes on the bed. To this day, I wonder which side of my own personal rift I’d have chosen. There was no doubt which side Gavin had. I wonder if it would have made any difference. Since the day I met him, my fate was sealed, maybe even before that. After all, he’ll always be my favorite poison, my special vice. I took my time dressing, enjoying it. Clothes fit as though made for me and I suppose in a way they were now that I had the body for which manufacturers made clothes. I hurried downstairs for breakfast.

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Chapter Four I entered the living room and looked at Raphael seated in his usual chair. He studied me silently for a moment. “Ready to begin training?” I put my hands on my hips and glared. “Don’t you rise when a lady enters the room anymore?” He rose slowly, smiling ironically, and bowed. “Do forgive my faux pas. I was dazzled by your beauty for a moment and forgot myself.” “Humph.” “I believe the word you’re looking for is ‘whatever’. You must adopt the lingo befitting your new body.” Gavin walked past me into the kitchen. “Coffee? Or would you rather have some Fruit Loops?” “Whatever.” Raphael ignored us. “If you’re pouring, Gavin, I’ll take some–coffee that is. Charity?” I followed them into the kitchen. "I think caffeine would be more of a hindrance than a help today. I am hungry, though.” I glanced at Gavin pointedly. “And as much as I appreciate Gavin’s generous offer, I’d much prefer protein instead of carbs if we’re going to be working hard. Are there any eggs?” Both men just stared at me, their cups halfway to their mouths. “I can cook you know.” Blink. Blink. I could see I wouldn’t get far with these two, so I helped myself to the frig. Fully stocked, it contained eggs and bacon. I pulled them out along with the butter and milk. I found a skillet in a cupboard and even non-stick spray. The men still stood and stared. “So, scrambled okay? Fellas? H-e-e-l-l-l-l-o-o?” Gavin reacted first, his grin endearing and mischievous. “You’ll have to excuse us, but most, uh, female Dancers at first won’t eat the calories let alone cook for us.” I cocked an eyebrow. “And how’s that usually work out for them?” Raphael answered, “Not so good. We usually spend the first couple days helping them recover enough to realize they have to eat.” I started the bacon strips, looked at them over my shoulder, and smiled. “You should have picked pleasantly plump women like me. We do know how to eat when we’re hungry. And most of us know how to cook, too.” Raphael sat at the counter sipping his coffee. “You do understand that Dancers are fated, not chosen, don’t you?” “Yeah, you mentioned that. How do you know who’s fated?” Raphael hesitated, so I turned around to ask again, but he interrupted. “How about if I just say that it’s my job to know and leave it at that.” “Whatever.” I could see the addictive quality of that one word answer.

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I went back to my cooking, figuring I had a lot of time to wheedle answers out of Raphael and Gavin both, so I’d just bide my time. I heard Gavin behind me, but never expected him to reach around me for some bacon. I swatted his hand with the spatula. Hey, I couldn’t help it. I just reacted. Besides, I don’t think I really hurt him. Raphael was laughing which probably didn’t help any. Gavin just shook his hand and scowled at me. You know, scowling, smiling, it didn’t matter. He was just plain delectable. I did give him an extra piece of bacon to make up for the spatula thing. The twinkle in his eye made me wonder if extra bacon had been what he was even after. ***** We spent the morning learning how to stretch and meditate. Tai Chi and Yoga type stuff. I nearly fell asleep several times, especially during the Yoga. I figured we were ready for the Marshall Arts fighting lessons after lunch. I was wrong. We spent the afternoon finding our centers. Well, my center anyway. That’s right, finding my center. When I got close, warmth formed in the center of my stomach or diaphragm and spread outward until my hands and feet radiated heat. It gave me a horrible headache. I learned later what to do with the concentrated power. First control, then power–lots of power. I had my eyes closed concentrating on locating my center when Gavin came from behind me to wrap his arms around me, his hands splayed over my stomach. He pressed. “Feel the center here?” If I hadn’t felt it, I might have considered elbowing him in the same place he pressed on me. Although his hands made concentrating difficult, the power surging through me at his touch dwarfed any solo effort on my part and needed little direction from me. I leaned back into him, giving as he pressed me back into his groin. I felt his erection spring to life and experienced a thrill of excitement and answering arousal. His hands moved to my hips and pulled me tighter into him his pelvis pressed firmly into my back. I definitely felt something, but I didn’t think it was my center. No, it was much lower than center. In all the time I Danced, I never failed to become aroused, even if only a little. When we Stepped Out together, the feelings were even more intense. I closed my eyes and gave in to the sweet erotic tingle rolling over me and to the burning power flowing through me. Gavin swept my hair aside and nuzzled my neck where it met my shoulder. I shivered though the afternoon was warm. His hands moved off my hips to reach up and release the zipper of my jumpsuit. Cupping my breasts, he thumbed my nipples through the lace of my bra. I groaned and leaned into him. “Come with me,” he whispered. “Where?” “No questions. Just come.” “Mm-hmm.” Lethargic from the afternoon sun and his hands on me, it was the most I could manage.

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I opened my eyes as a gust of wind sent grass and leaves spiraling around our feet. We stood under a tree on a grass-covered hill overlooking other rolling hills. Like a sea of grass, they continued as far as the eye could see, groves of trees dotting the landscape. The sky in various shades of gray, held angry looking clouds in even darker shades of charcoal and purple. In the distance, cliffs jutted starkly from the hills, powerful waves pounding against them. I stepped from Gavin’s arms pulling the zipper of my jumpsuit back up and turned in a circle taking in a panoramic view. I shivered and he wrapped his arms around me again resting his chin on my head. “So, where are we?” “Where I grew up. It’s part of the British Isles now.” “I thought you came from Pompeii.” I felt him shrug. “Not originally. It’s a long story for another time. But this is where my heart lives and has always lived.” I leaned further back into him. “Even after all these years?” “So it would seem.” Thunder rumbled softly as a light mist started falling around us. Wind and rain rattled the leaves overhead and I moved closer still to Gavin’s warm body. He wrapped himself more securely around me. I looked up at him over my shoulder. He tilted his face up into the rain and I felt his enjoyment. As the drizzle increased, I stuck out my hand to catch the rain in my palm. Unlike the thick drops of home, the rain was soft and coated my hand rather than plopping into it. I wiggled my bare toes in the turf and shivered again. “You’re cold. We should go.” He released me and turned me to face him. “Take my hand and I’ll let you drive.” Nervous, but excited, I placed both of my hands in his and gripped him tightly. “What do I do first?” He laughed. “First, you loosen your grip so I can get my circulation back.” “Oh, sorry.” I let go of him completely. He pulled me to him, wrapping me in his arms. “Maybe for the first time, we should get a little closer.” I had no problems with that. I wrapped my arms around him, laying my head on his chest. His heat penetrated his shirt and warmed my cheek. I listened as his heartbeat sped up when I tightened my hold. I inhaled deeply loving the clean earthy smell of the rain and Gavin’s heady, sensual smell mixing around me. “Let the power roll through you and carry you with it. Like surfing or skiing, ride the crest with the power behind pushing you.” The burn started in my gut, but I stepped ahead of the pain like stepping onto an escalator. Warmth and a feeling of well-being filled my like endorphins after a race. I looked up into his face. His eyes darkened and I could feel their pull. The rain, pain and pleasure, the power and the pull of his eyes, gathered and mixed in a collage of color and lights. I instinctively knew where to go and how to get there, so I Stepped Out and felt the tug of time frames left behind.

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The lights, color and motion stopped and left us at home in the backyard. Gavin unzipped me again slipping his hands into the opening, his fingers cool against my heated flesh. The power I’d only barely felt before grew, the warmth flushing my face and spreading out into my fingers and toes. Like a drug, it made me feel omnipotent and eager to experience more of Gavin’s touch. But it occurred to me that my new body might be new in a lot of ways. “Uh, Gavin?” “Mmm-hmm?” I straightened and pulled slightly away from him. “Is this body I have the one before or after Prom night?” “What?” I turned around to face him. “Before we take this any further, I’d just like to know has it, or, have I ever, uh....” He burst out laughing and I thought he might seriously injure himself, get a hernia or something if he didn’t calm down. Finally, he caught his breath enough to talk, though I could still see the flicker of humor in his eyes. “Charity, I think if you’re going to fuck someone, you should be able to say the word, don’t you?” I turned around and stomped away. His laughter followed me back into the house. Hey, it was getting late anyway and time to quit...everything. Besides, I think my concentration was shot for the day. I did know I didn’t need to see Gavin for a while. He was right about one thing, though, I wasn’t ready for this. The pull I’d felt for Gavin since we had first met had only grown. Desire for him was a hunger, an itch I figured I’d scratch sooner or later. I ran up the stairs to my room before I got any itchier. ***** Dinner that night was delicious. I learned that we had a seldom-seen staff of three– cook, maid, and general all-around handyman. That would explain the clean clothes and clean rooms. All during the meal, Gavin’s smirk followed me. Neither of us talked much, though. It must have driven Raphael bonkers, because after a few minutes of my avoiding eye contact with both of them and Gavin’s suppressed laughter, Raphael sat back and folded his arms across his chest looking inquisitively between Gavin and me. “Okay. What happened?” “Nothing.” Now I really couldn’t look Raphael in the eye. “Gavin?” “Nothing. Charity and I just spent a little time learning more about each other. We’re practicing forging connections,” he said with a straight face. Raphael considered us silently for a few minutes. “Fine. Then you should be ready to show her some uses for those suits. We’re about done here, right?” “Hmm, more time with Charity? It’s a lot to ask, but I guess I’m up to the task.” Gavin

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stood and extended his hand to me. “Coming, Charity?” I stood and ignored his hand. I really didn’t want to touch him anymore than necessary right then. He messed up my concentration let alone my tantrum. “I’ll try and not be a burden.” He just laughed at my intended slight. It was nearly impossible to insult Gavin. He found everything so goddamn funny. I preceded him out of the dining room into the living room with his laughter trailing after me. In the middle of the room, I stopped and faced him. “What do I do first?” “Well, first you smile.” His palm stroked my cheek sending shivers down my spine. I smiled in spite of myself and he kissed the corner of my mouth. His tongue ran along the seam of my mouth separating my lips for his entry. Both his hands now cupped my face allowing him control of our kiss, his kiss, his possession. Forgetting about Raphael watching, my mother’s best advice, and every shred of selfrespect I still called my own; I fisted my hands in his shirt and pulled him to me, wrapping myself in the decadent pleasure of his body. With Gavin, I found embers of feelings spring to life within me that I thought long dead. They ignited a conflagration I feared would consume, not only my body, but also the innermost part I’d protected for so long. Fear and need played Tug ‘O War in the pit of my stomach. The familiar burning ache there and tingling along my nerve endings warned me we had started traveling to a distant time and place. I pulled away to look into his forever eyes. Seeing the path to heaven or hell, I knew eventually that I wouldn’t care which path I took as long as I took it with him. The spatial disorientation ceased and I looked around at the desolate landscape, feeling the heat emanating from the baked and cracked ground beneath us. It was full daylight, about noon, the absolute worst time of day for this place. “Let me guess, Death Valley?” “How’d you know?” “Hmm, maybe the total lack of any life or the feeling of being baked alive. Also, they filmed part of Star Wars here.” “Glad to see your education is so diverse.” Gavin turned slowly around and pointed. “Regardless of how it looks, there is life all around us. Looks can be deceiving. For instance, right over here is a rift in progress with your name on it.” The rift itself appeared to be about three feet long and a couple inches wide, about a foot off the ground. Light and color bent around the borders of the tear and the whole thing looked like a slit in a movie screen on which the scene in front of us was projected. I wondered how I’d never noticed one before. I turned and asked Gavin. “You’ve never seen them because you’ve never been in the same Time and Space frame with any of them before. This…place exists out of phase with the normal or ‘real’ world in which we live. This is one of the parallel planes, the one through which Time flows like air through ductwork–sort of like in between then and now and later. “How far into the future and past does this plane we’re on extend?” He faced me and put his hands loosely on my waist. “We’re at the front or nose, the part that pushes forward into the future. Even microseconds ahead are being chained or woven into this plane of existence. But Stepping into the future takes more control and skill

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than Stepping into the past because the shifting present constantly changes the future. "The further you go forward, the easier it is to Step there because there is less of a chance of being caught at the cusp where the present and future mesh.” I interrupted, “What happens if you’re caught on the cusp?” He frowned. “I’m not sure exactly. I’ve asked Rafe and he just shrugs. I do know that the ones who did get caught there no longer exist.” “Dancers can die? I thought we were immortal.” Gavin shook his head emphatically. “No, ‘virtually’ immortal. We don’t age; that wouldn’t be conducive to Time Dancing. We don’t get sick; viruses and bacteria wouldn’t survive Stepping Out. By the same token, we’re sterile because those types of cells couldn’t survive Dancing either.” He smiled and pulled me closer to rest his forehead against mine. “That’s why Dancers are taken later in life, after they’ve had and raised children or gotten past that time in life when it’s of paramount importance.” I pulled back to see him better. “And how far into the past does this plane extend?” He smiled. “The past rolls off the plane like taffy onto a table. It folds onto itself. And like taffy, each of the layers is of varying sizes. Just as in the future, the further back you go, the less chance you have of getting caught at the fold or joint.” He dropped his hands from my waist and turned to face the rift with me. “Let’s get acquainted with our friend here.” He pointed to the aperture I’d noticed before. I felt the vibrations coming from the general area he’d indicated. I walked toward the emanations, my hands extended. The further I walked, the faster the air surrounding me beat and pulsed–a living thing. The tactile feel of the invisible curtain I’d reached gave weight and dimension to the rift. A sensual, vibrant cloak that I wanted to wrap around me to become part of the rift. I moved forward, but Gavin held my arms from behind and pulled me against him. “Yes, it calls, Charity, but don’t answer like that. Slowly, like a reluctant maid, you have to charm her. Seduce the rift or you’ll be the one consumed. Here, I’ll show you. We’ll Dance together.” He ran his fingers down the back of my arms and hands, finally stopping to fit his against mine. The siren’s song of the rift intensified as Gavin clasped me closer. I realized we both felt the sensuous pull as Gavin again grew hard, his erection arousing me even further, the call of the Dance stirring both our reactions. I closed my eyes allowing all the sensations bombarding me time to settle and separate into individual identifiable pieces. The harmonic dissonance was, at first, jarring. “Here, Charity.” Gavin pushed in again on my stomach. “Can you feel the temporal alignment when the frequencies match?” I felt the vibrations fight to align, but fail as they came close. “Not quite. It’s like they hover around each other, and then overshoot. What am I doing wrong?” I looked up at him over my shoulder. He frowned and pursed his lips. Then pulled off his top and dropped it. Grabbing the hem of my top, he started tugging it up. I lowered my

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arms quickly and grabbed it, stepping away from him. “What are you doing?” He laughed. “I’m trying to improve the touch.” He reached for my top again. I stepped back further. “How is stripping going to improve the touch, except for in the obvious way?” He put his hands on his hips. “Charity, the clothes are interfering with the sensitivity. I need to help you feel the vibrations.” I watched him, undecided. He lowered his hands from his hips and reached slowly toward me, cajoling, “Let me show you. It’s like using a tuning fork to adjust the pitch on a musical instrument.” I didn’t resist this time when he slipped behind me and pulled off my top. He laid his arms along the back of mine and laced our fingers raising both our hands toward the rift. His warm breath disturbed the hair by my ear when he whispered, “Can you feel the vibrations?” I nodded. He moved our hands closer to the pulsing lights. Vibrations traveled up my arms raising the hairs. I shivered and pushed back into him. Gavin lowered his left arm wrapping it around my middle, pulling me closer. “Has the burning started here yet?” I hadn’t noticed before but it had started burning in the area of my diaphragm. Not as unpleasant as Stepping Out, more like indigestion. I nodded. “Good. That means you’re aligning your body to the rhythm of the rift.” He raised our left hands and we reach for the rift again. A low thrum vibrated through my body. I felt myself adjusting to the cadence of the rift aligning the frequency to match its rhythm. We reached the matching frequency, the resulting hum melodious and haunting. Our palms flat against the fissure’s outer shell, Gavin directed our hands into the pulsating fracture. Instantly, like a parted curtain or dipping your hand into a river of glowing paint, light in shades of violet, purple and blue streamed from the rift’s core. Reds in cerise and fuchsia poured from us covering the streaming beams and drowning them in magenta waves. Energy like golf balls struck my arms. The burn in my stomach matched the burn in my hands. “Charity, now push back into the rift. Time flows like water in a river, like electricity through wires, like the blood in your veins. Match your inner rhythm to the rhythm of the flow and push back. Dance with Time.” Heat left through my fingertips and Gavin pulled our hands out of the rift’s center and rested them against the outer shell once again. The flow from our hands increased. The resulting current washed over the fissure and seeped into it. A lurid sucking noise accompanied the ebb of the amethyst glow and the vibrations ceased. I knew that we had sealed the rift. Gavin whispered, “That should do it,” then folded his arms around me, capturing my arms in the embrace. Remnants of my earlier arousal leapt to life. I leaned back into him craving the feel of

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his body against mine. A burning ache stabbed along my arms pulling me out of whatever sensual trance I’d been in. Unwrapping myself from Gavin’s hold, I rubbed each of my forearms in turn and looked down to find streaks of red and blue bruises along each arm I turned to face Gavin. “What the hell is this?” He shrugged. “It’s the reason we wear these suits. You’ll stop bruising so easily after a couple months. A couple more months and you’ll hardly bruise at all, even for the most damaged fractures.” He picked up my top, shook it out and handed it to me. Suddenly self-conscious, I turned my back to him and pulled it over my head, then turned to face him again. The pain did me one favor. It distracted me from the lure of Gavin’s body. I’ve never wanted anyone, ever, as much as I wanted Gavin. So maybe this soul mate thing had merit. Gavin touched my shoulder tenderly. “Does it hurt that much?” “Does what hurt that much?” “The bruises.” I glanced down and realized that I’d been rubbing my arms. “No, not really.” I smiled up at him. “Besides, it’s only temporary, right?” His return smile started my heart on its racing pattern again. I moved back and turned away from him, self-preservation being one of my stronger instincts. “So what’s next, Boss?” When he didn’t answer, I turned to face him. He stepped closer, but didn’t try touching me. Still I could feel the heat from him, a living thing that called me to enter into the flames, just a tad. A little singeing around the edges wouldn’t hurt. But I knew that once I entered, I’d be drained, and then there’d be nothing left of me…again. My husband had left me for another woman and nearly destroyed me. I’d fought and healed, building a new person stronger than the original. Yet somehow, I knew if Gavin left, my annihilation would be complete. The logic of that notion struck me as insane. After all, I’d only known him a short time, but the notion stuck. Yeah, maybe this soul mate thing did have merit. He cocked his head to the side and observed me silently, like a crossword puzzle. He frowned, obviously not deciphering whatever code unlocked the hidden me. He looked as though he wanted to say something, but the moment passed. I chuckled at the absurdity of my thoughts. Gavin’s frown deepened turning my chortles to all out, belly-shaking, maniacal laughter. The harder I laughed, the more confused his expression grew, until I bent over from the cramps in my stomach that my laughter had caused. His expression grew alarmed. I don’t know, maybe I just needed the emotional release from the strain of the last few days. Men never seem to appreciate the release we women feel from letting go and shoving all emotion outside. It’s like spring-cleaning, though most women cry, not laugh. Like I said, I don’t find crying all that rewarding. Laughter, on the other hand, is purely cathartic. I sat in the sun stroked dirt as my chuckles wound down and wiped the tears from my cheeks. Gavin bent over me, probably wishing he had an extra straight jacket handy. I

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reassured him that I was fine. And I was. The release was enough to carry me through until the next time. I’d have to get Gavin to loosen up, though. He couldn’t have a conniption fit every time I had a…well, a conniption fit. One of us had to be stable and I chose him.

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Chapter Five As I sat in the dirt, a feeling of dread slowly replaced the euphoric feelings I’d had. I looked up at Gavin and saw that he was looking around. He bent and helped me to stand, sniffing the air like a bloodhound. “Gavin?” His nose wrinkled and he coughed his body anxious to rid itself of the noxious fumes now evident all around us. “Demons.” He spewed the word like a curse. “How do you know?” I didn’t see anything yet. “Besides the stench, watch the ground around the rift.” Gavin pointed to the area where the rift had been. I held my arm over my nose, the malodorous air wafting around us now like a stinking cesspool. My stomach took a couple tentative heaves and settled down into painful cramping. One hand over my nose and one hand clutching my stomach, I squinted and finally noted insect-like movement over the parched land. Like an infestation of Guinea Worms, the ground roiled and heaved. Flashes of malevolent beings popped into view now and then like worms ripe and ready to emerge from the skin. “They nibble away at the leavings of damaged rifts, increasing the mutilation. It takes many of them a lot of time to really hurt a rift badly, but their smell is really rank.” Gavin turned away from the proximity of the awful creatures. I had no desire to get any closer and I was more than eager to leave the fetid stench, but like a car accident, I couldn’t seem to look away. “Why are they so loathsome? How could anyone choose the darkness with these things as examples?” Gavin snorted. They’re just soldiers, the dregs of the Underworld. Evil can present a beautiful face when it so desires. Now let’s get out of here before I rolf.” He took my arm and we Stepped Out. ***** We trained intensively for a couple more weeks. I learned moves that caused even my young, enhanced body morning-after pains. We repaired rifts of various sizes and colors, yet the colors pouring from us were always reds. I learned the hues represented the strength of the seepage, the blues at the opposite end of the spectrum from the reds being the weakest. The rift we’d seal would be darkest crimson. My mind wandered when Raphael and Gavin explained the physics behind color, energy, and drowning or flooding rifts to stop the bleeding. I Danced by feel. I guess you could say I had natural rhythm. When I could feel the energy in certain places in my body, when I could tell the most propitious moment to caress the flow, I’d just do it. This frustrated Gavin and amused Raphael. Strangely, Gavin’s patience with me seemed boundless and so did his appeal. He’d

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begin by demonstrating to me with his body how my body should Dance. He always ended by touching me more than physically. His company and caresses became the chocolate I craved–sweet, decadent, never enough and, oh, so very bad for me. For some reason, though, I held off taking that final step. I sensed sex with Gavin meant more than just sex. Something told me to wait. One evening, I learned what the secret that Gavin and Raphael had kept from me was. The three of us ate dinner together each night and discussed everything from history to philosophy. The evenings always began with a strange ritual. We’d walk into the house and no matter the time, Raphael awaited us in the living room in his favorite chair, his index fingers steepled, his brow furrowed in thought, his eyes staring into the far reaches of a time and place no one else could see. He’d look up as we entered the room and catch Gavin’s eye. They’d silently assess each other, waiting. Raphael would finally ask, “Well?” and Gavin would answer, “Not yet.” Raphael would sigh and we’d go eat the meal prepared by the hidden cook and served by the invisible maid. At least I never saw them. I knew they were keeping something from me. And I knew I wouldn’t like whatever it was, but even my fertile imagination could not come up with a possible answer to what the ‘thing’ could be. Of course, I asked about the ritual and the illusive servants, but both Raphael and Gavin merely stared, smiled or ignored me altogether. I didn’t push figuring it wouldn’t do any good. Another thing life teaches, if you’re smart enough to pay attention, is to choose your battles wisely. Unbelievably, the one thing I’ve always had in abundance is patience. It’s the sustaining part of innate stubbornness–my most pronounced personality trait. It sustained me through many years of marriage to a louse who didn’t know the meaning of loyalty. It sustained me through raising two independent and intelligent children without losing sight of the goal or my temper very often. It even sustained me through surviving in a male-dominated career field full of land mines for the unwary and topped by the proverbial glass ceiling. No, two men, ancient and experienced though they were, would be able to outwait and outlast me once my mind was set. The house was large and airy. I’d heard it dated from the Civil War era. Although never a working ranch, it resembled a large hacienda. Terracotta tile and expensive hardwood floors with thick stucco-glazed adobe and wooden walls still graced the home. Thoroughly modernized, the house still held old-world charm and appeal. I explored whenever I had a chance, fascinated by every nook and cranny. I had been going through old clothing stored in a large walk-in closet next to the front room. Short beaded flapper dresses shared space with floor-length ball gowns and men’s’ suits of every era. At first, I barely noticed that Gavin and Raphael were talking in the other room. When their conversation heated up a few decibels, I unashamedly crept closer to the closet entrance in order to listen. “Rafe, why do you keep pestering me about this?” I could imagine Gavin’s hand raking through his hair in frustration. Most of the times we worked together, Gavin’s tone remained even, but his hair ended up being in total disarray

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by the time we finished. “I told you that I’ll know when the time is right.” “Unfortunately, Gavin, there’s no time left to be the right time.” “What do you mean? You said six months. It’s barely been one.” “It seems we underestimated his ability to concentrate efforts on this front. He’s never before been able to marshal forces this quickly. I suppose his determination has increased considering the Age of Man soon draws to an end.” “One last hurrah, huh?” “So it would seem?” There was a marked pause and I considered leaving my hiding spot, when Gavin spoke nearly too softly for my hearing, “How soon?” “Another month if we’re lucky, only a couple weeks if we’re not.” “She’s not ready.” “I thought she exceeded all your expectations.” “She does in training, in her obstinate refusal to concede defeat, even in how much she personally appeals to me, but she’s not ready to be joined.” “You know if you’d told her about the necessity of joining sooner, she’d be ready by now.” “No, Rafe, she wouldn’t because she wouldn’t be here.” “But, surely her duty—” “Her duty is not how she decides things. Oh, she’ll do it, eventually, but I don’t know how to present it to her, so she doesn’t feel betrayed.” “There isn’t time for eventually either. For Heaven’s sake, Gavin, just seduce her.” Gavin’s laughter had a hard biting edge to it that did nothing to melt the ice encasing my heart. “Seduce her? Seduce her and then the morning after just casually mention that now we’re bonded mind, body and soul? That what happens to one of us now happens to both? “I might even have been able to do it that way earlier, when I didn’t know the inner her as well. God knows I want her more each day, but the time for sex to be, even remotely casual between us, has long passed. It would irreparably hurt her and our relationship.” I heard Raphael rise and his voice fade, as he must have followed Gavin from the room. “Gavin, there’s no choice. You need the two weeks to acquaint her with reading auras and for her to get comfortable dealing with the joining. Gavin there Is. No. More. Time!” Their voices faded as they continued arguing on their way to the dining room. Stunned, I remained motionless for several minutes while I thought over what I’d heard and chewed on it awhile. Somehow, obviously with sex, Gavin and I had to join to fight whatever evil forces were now making trouble. While finally being with Gavin, being filled and possessed by him excited me, having no choice or even worse, being tricked into it, countered all of it. I left my hiding place taking care to make as little noise as possible, and climbed the stairs to my room. I locked the door though I knew the simple barrier could stop neither Raphael nor Gavin for long. I counted on their reluctance to intrude on my privacy–for a short time at least. A short time was all I needed. I used precious minutes, though, changing into fresh clothes and hunting up

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sunglasses. I hadn’t yet missed my family and friends as my adventure hadn’t seemed real and certainly not permanent. Reality has a funny way of attacking when you least expect it. Reality had finally captured me. I found my sunglasses right where I had left them in the purse I hadn’t used since I got here. I was surprised it was even here since I didn’t have it with me when I left Cammy’s with Gavin. Just another one of those thoughtful things Gavin did to make me feel more at home. It made me furious. Why couldn’t he just be a self-centered insensitive jerk like the men I was accustomed to so I could discount and ignore my growing feelings for him? I hadn’t yet learned how to travel through time, but I did know how to skip through space. It’s much easier to maneuver around in one time frame than it is to Step Out of the frame. I knew I had to get away for at least a little while. I wasn’t sure where to go or for how long, but my nature didn’t take too kindly to being finessed and lied to. I’d had a lifetime of that already. I put the glasses on top of my head and sat cross-legged on the floor, my eyes closed, trying to find my center of power. At first, I found it difficult to clear my mind and shut out distractions, but I finally managed. The familiar burning started and I clamped down separating myself from the pain, controlling the steps, Dancing. As I Stepped Out, I opened my eyes. Gavin stood framed in the doorway, his expression harsh and resolute with just a pinch of regret. “Charity, stay. There’s nowhere to go that I won’t follow. For good or evil we’re tied together now…forever.” “Perhaps.” I wrenched my eyes from the hypnotic tug of his. “Perhaps not.” I Jumped and escaped before he had time to move. I knew he’d follow, but I hoped he wouldn’t find me right away. I had no definite plans and no idea what I wanted to accomplish by leaving. I knew that I’d already embraced my role as a Dancer, but the deception still grated. Funny thing was, I’d fallen completely in love with Gavin, despite my oath never to allow anyone that much control again and I’d done it in record time. Oddly relieved that I finally knew all there was to know, I still hated giving up control. It hadn’t worked out well the last time I did. But Gavin wasn’t Ed and I wasn’t the naïve girl I’d been. Gavin would take turns being on top. I smiled at the turn my thoughts had taken and realized I was close to accepting what seemed inevitable…but not quite. ***** I chose to visit my son first. He taught computer classes at ASU. I knew I could melt into the throng of students attending his introductory computer course. Newly graduated and working on his Masters degree, Ian had the least technical, but most crowded classes as is normal in a university. I found an empty seat in the back of the large amphitheater. I removed my sunglasses reassured that, even with my odd clothes, if Ian noticed me, he still wouldn’t recognize me. Who expects to see their eighteen-year-old mother sitting in the back of their classroom? I didn’t pay much attention to his lecture, but spent the hour drinking in the sight of my

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oldest child. Probably for the last time. I remembered the day he made me a first time mother. Regardless of popular belief, that’s the day a girl becomes a woman. His blond curls bouncing as he ran through life eager to experience everything at once, Ian had been the happiest little boy. His smile claimed more of my heart than any other human ever had. I saw now how my devotion to my children had hurt my marriage. To me my children had always been the most important people and my number one priority. Children need unconditional love, but so do husbands…and wives. I’d never been able to give that last part of me to my husband, or to any other person. Was I ready to give all of myself to Gavin? Students rising and leaving alerted me to the end of class and drew me back to the present. Ian watched me a moment, a frown creasing the line between his eyes. Damn! I’d forgotten how much my daughter looked like me at this age. Ian must have noticed. I lowered the sunglasses to hide my eyes and stood to leave. Gavin leaned indolently against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest, one leg bent and his foot resting against the doorjamb. In spite of my anger at his and Raphael’s deceit, my heart sped up at the sight of him. My fingers itched to touch him; and as though he had already touched me, my nipples tightened. I was already wet and throbbing, aching for him. But I wasn’t ready to give in just yet. He blocked the door I’d entered by, leaving only the door down on the floor unguarded. I’d have to pass close to Ian to get to it, though. Luckily, a throng of students crowded around him vying for his attention. I looked back and forth between Gavin and Ian. Gavin crooked his finger signaling me to follow him. I shook my head and smiled. He and I both knew he’d avoid taking me out of the middle of all these people by force. Besides, it wouldn’t be that easy. I may not be his equal, but he’d still have to touch me to control me. Gavin crooked his finger again. I smiled and shook my head again then turned to descend to the lecture floor. I didn’t wait to see if Gavin followed. I knew he would. He couldn’t even call out to me without really making Ian suspicious. Someone who looked like his sister and had his mother’s name would definitely catch Ian’s attention. I reached the crowd, and sedately made my way to the exit. I turned when I reached the door to take one last look at my son. Enough to last a lifetime. Ian caught my eye and raised his brows questioningly. I threw him a quick kiss, startling him, and then exited the room Stepping Out as soon as I saw no one in the short hallway. ***** Gavin would expect me to go to my daughter, but he didn’t know where. A graduate art student at Northern Arizona University, she was currently in the White Mountains painting and not on campus. It would take Gavin some time to find that out. Here the air still had a definite chill. Sunrise Ski Resort operated by the White Mountains Apache Tribe in northeastern Arizona, reaches an elevation of more than 11,000 feet. I breathed in a lungful of clean, crisp mountain air and started the short hike to where I knew Carrie would be. I’d Danced to a secluded area to avoid anyone seeing me.

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The hill holding the ski lift resembled a shaved head with a reverse Mohawk. It presented a slightly jarring picture in the spring and summer months. Carrie sat contemplating the green and gold scenery before her oblivious to anything but her partially completed painting and the view. Her golden blond hair piled haphazardly off her neck, she appeared fragile and dainty until one noticed her toned body. She’d given me hell growing up. Fiercely independent, her stubbornness made me look docile. I hoped she’d find a man worthy of her, but doubted any man, except her brother whom she’d always idolized, could ever handle her. Ian and Carrie rubbed off on each other. Ian’s calm acceptance and logical outlook countered Carrie’s fiery stubbornness and impulsive behavior. I doubt anyone has ever had two children that are more diverse. I was proud of having produced them and amazed at how much I liked them as people. I must have made some noise because Carrie looked over her shoulder pinning me with a keen stare. Like her brother, she frowned in confusion. “Do I know you?” I left my sunglasses on. Something I would not normally do, as it’s kinda rude not to look people in the eye. “No, I don’t think so.” Carrie, cocking her head to the side to study me said, “Hmm, you look like my cousin, Anne. What’s your name?” I hadn’t thought I’d be talking to either of my kids so I hadn’t thought up a cover story. “Leah Carpenter.” Gavin should feel honored. “And you?” “Carrie Cramer.” “Well, Carrie, I really like your painting.” She glanced down at it. “Thanks. Painting’s my life.” “Don’t let the other parts of life get away from you. You’re old before you know it and regrets make poor substitutes for memories.” She laughed. “What are you, all of seventeen or eighteen?” Okay, so I’d forgotten myself. She frowned again. “Are you sure we haven’t met?” “I’m sure.” She shrugged and returned to her painting. I moved closer, hungry to watch her face a few more minutes. She turned her gaze to me again and raised her brows in question. I pointed to her painting. “You do this for a living?” Her smile brightened. “I’m still studying, but this is for a show in a small gallery in Flagstaff that my friend owns.” I hadn’t heard about this. “Your parents must be proud.” She laughed. “In a perfect world.” She continued talking while she painted. “My father will probably come, but I’m sure he’ll have to bring his latest girlfriend. God forbid he spend the night alone or trying to talk to his family.” I was almost afraid to ask, “And your mother?” She smiled sadly. “I try not to bother her too much. She’s had a hard time and doesn’t

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get out much. Besides, with my dad and his latest being there together with my mom makes everyone uncomfortable.” Now that took me aback. “Your mother doesn’t feel comfortable around your dad?” “I don’t think she cares. Not really, but it makes me uncomfortable seeing them both somewhere but not together.” I remembered my high school graduation and seeing my parents in the audience, but rows apart. It had been a depressing reminder of things lost forever. I guess it doesn’t matter how old you get, your parents are home and stability…until they’re not anymore. In a way, I’d felt homeless up until the day my father died. “I know how you feel, but your mother might really want to see your work.” She laughed. “Are you sure you don’t know her? There’s another reason, though–my boyfriend.” “You have a boyfriend?” She laughed harder at that. “Is that so hard to believe?” “Well, no, I mean I’m not sure why I thought you didn’t; especially as pretty as you are.” “Why thank you, Leah. You can hang out here anytime.” She paused and looked at me long enough to make me uncomfortable, then loaded her brush and continued painting again. “My boyfriend owns the gallery where I’ll be showing, ‘The Frame of Mind’. I’ve been living with him the last four months, but my mother doesn’t know.” Just when you think you know all there is to know about someone. “You have? Why haven’t you told her?” I didn’t even know his name. She stopped painting and tapped her bottom lip with the end of the brush while she thought. “I’m not sure. Probably because she really disapproved when my brother moved in with his girlfriend. She never says anything, but her whole body radiates disapproval. I can do without that for a little while longer.” Okay, that did it. “Did it ever occur to you that your brother flits from girl to girl like some giant testosterone bumblebee and that the only reason he moves in with anyone is to save money on dates?” She burst out laughing and I realized what I had just said. “So, you do know my brother.” Uh, oh. “Well, yes. I took one of his classes and I’ve heard things. You know.” “Hmm. It sounds like you might know him pretty well.” I thought for a second that she might figure something out. I didn’t see how she’d figure out the truth, but I didn’t particularly want her asking uncomfortable questions. She shrugged and returned to her painting. “My brother’s just a tad skittish now. He’s not going to commit himself until he’s sure a girl is ‘the one’. I’ve tried to tell him that it doesn’t work that way, but he doesn’t listen.”

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She stopped and watched me closely again. “I like you, so I’m going to give you a little advice. If you’re at all interested, don’t give up on Ian. He’ll take a while, maybe a long while, but he’s worth it. He needs someone like you. Someone who sees him for who he is.” I hid my smile. It’s not every day your daughter gives you her blessing to date her brother, your son. Besides the ‘ick’ factor, it gives new meaning to looking for a girl just like your mother. She returned to her painting, and I stepped even closer to ask, “Do you have a flyer or something for your show?” I had an idea. She put her brush in her mouth and rummaged through her knapsack. She pulled out a business card and handed it to me, returned the brush to her hand. “I don’t have a flyer with me, but here’s a card for the gallery. The show is next Saturday and Sunday. That’s my boyfriend’s name there, Dillon MacDonald.” “Oh, an Irish name.” “Yes, Mom would like that. She’s Irish. Hey, I’ll give a good word to my brother about you. He’s between women right now. Who knows. You may be ‘the one’.” I chuckled. “Somehow, I doubt that.” She frowned and looked at me. I figured it would be a good time to leave. ”Well, I need to take off. Good luck on your show. Nice to meet you.” I started through the trees to the secluded spot at which I’d arrived, her “Yeah, same here,” following me. She was all too perceptive. I wondered if her artist’s eyes gave her a head for noticing details or if I was just lucky that way. Quickly I Stepped Out as soon as I could no longer see her. I wondered how long it would take Gavin to find Carrie and if he’d actually ask her about me. Maybe. I wondered if Carrie and her brother would compare notes about the strange girl and the guy following her around. Likely. But if they told the ‘other me’, she or I would be oblivious and would ignore their questions. It would all blow over as one of those weird happenings in life. I hoped. Still, I planned to take one more risk. ***** I Stepped Out to the back of the hotel I usually stayed at while visiting Carrie in Flagstaff. I didn’t’ figure there would be anyone around there. Luckily, I was right. The stench of tobacco, coffee grounds, and rotting vegetables filled the air, but I could still detect the faint scent of pine trees and burning fireplace logs. I circled around to the front and entered the lobby. Moving to the front desk, I deliberately chose the young man sitting behind a computer screen rather than the middle-aged woman manning the reception desk. I figured I could get more information from him than from her. I wished I’d had the sophistication to use my natural resources while I still had them, but I knew what to do with them now. The young man looked up and did a double take, fastening his gaze on me a little south

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of my chin. I mentally rolled my eyes, but plastered a vacuous smile on my face. “Excuse me,” I checked his nameplate. “Brian. I have an address here, but I’m not sure how to get there.” I laid ‘The Frame of Mind’ business card on the counter. He picked it up and checked the address. "It’s about a mile north of here, straight down the highway.” He returned the card and gave me a smarmy smile he must have thought charming. “I get off in an hour. How about I drive you there?” I giggled in my best imitation of an empty-headed eighteen-year-old taken with his charm. “That’s so sweet of you, but my boyfriend is picking me up.” Since it wasn’t far, I decided to walk. The jumpsuit protected me against the chill. Quaint and artsy, The Frame of Mind displayed all types of photographs and paintings. An attractive young man in his mid-twenties with blond hair and blue eyes looked up as I walked in. He frowned as I approached and asked, “Do I know you?” “I’m Leah Carpenter, a friend of Carrie’s.” He smiled and shook my hand. “I’m Dillon. Carrie’s having a show here this weekend you know.” I liked him. Friendly and personable, he never once checked out my chest. “Yes, I know. I’m here to pick up a couple flyers.” His smile widened. “That would be great.” He picked up some flyers from a stack in front of him and handed them to me. “Tell everyone you know. Carrie’s paintings will sell themselves.” “I certainly will.” I shook his hand again. “It was very nice meeting you, Dillon.” “Same here. I’ll tell Carrie you stopped by.” I left the gallery, walked the couple of blocks to the post office, and purchased an envelope and stamps. I found a pen and scribbled a note on the flyer. I only hoped the ‘other me’ would take my advice and attend Carrie’s showing. It seemed I could still do something to influence my life. Even if it belonged to someone else now.

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Chapter Six The cabin had been vacant for many months. It belonged to my family, or Ed would have taken it in the divorce as well. I rarely used it, so I’d decided to sell. I was sure no one would find me here. Well, except for Gavin. He’d be here eventually. I had a key with me and entered through the back door by the kitchen. The musty, stale scent of long disuse surrounded me as I stepped through the doorway. Turning on all the utilities helped to make the cabin seem a little less empty. And opening all the screened windows and washing the bedding and linens made it homier. Plenty of dry food stocked the shelves. I had a bowl of soup and made Kool-Aid for later. Although it was early May, the nights were good and chilly at this elevation. After making the bed, I brought wood and kindling in off the porch and started a fire in the woodburning fireplace. I decided hot cocoa might taste better in front of the fire, so I carried my things to the couch in front of it. Spaghetti-Os were better than I remembered or I was just too hungry to care, so I had two bowls. I washed up my dishes and took my cocoa into the living room. Sitting crosslegged on the couch, I cradled my warm cup and stared into the flames. They danced hypnotically reminding me of rifts, Time Dancing, and of course, Gavin. I took a deep swallow from the mug, finishing my cocoa. I had it bad. Everything reminded me of Gavin. I shook my head, disgusted with my own weaknesses. Even after having known him such a short time, I realized I’d started to love him and that I wouldn’t have felt so betrayed if I hadn’t. And I knew one other thing: I hadn’t let go of my old life, but it had let go of me. The glow from the good deed I’d done earlier had begun to fade. I was a little envious of the ‘other me’, even though that life no longer fit. Looking back, I realized that I had become fearful that I’d never have anyone. At least Ed Cramer had me believing that he was the only one who would have me. I gave him control and adopted his opinions as my own in exchange for the dubious security of a husband and home. I pulled out my wallet, opening it to the pictures. I remembered the day we’d had the first picture of my children taken. It was all I could do to convince my daughter to keep her dress down and not show the photographer her new lace underwear. My son scowled, belligerence in his posture. He clutched his new baseball glove tightly, but I’d refused to let him keep his bat since he’d already clubbed his sister twice with it. It had always been my favorite picture of them, as it captured forever their essence completely at a time when we’d still been a happy family. But nothing lasts forever. Not happiness. Not sadness. I flipped through the remaining pictures, recalling each step of my children’s childhood as they progressed into adulthood. I only saw each of them a few times a year now. It’s the way of things. Children leave and make lives for themselves. Though I would now risk my life to protect it, I would never again participate in the business of everyday living. I missed it more

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than I ever thought I would. Ian, my bright baby, had been born and for the first time in my life, I fell completely and irrevocably in love. Carrie, my child of strength and determination, came a year later. Two more perfect works of human art had never been born and they loved me unconditionally regardless of how I looked or acted, what I could, could not, what I would, or would not, and what I did or did not do for them. I protected them, taught them, loved them with all my heart and let them go when it was time. When I’d finished raising them, only the tattered remnants of a marriage beyond repair remained. The failure for that marriage could be laid equally at my feet. I saw that now. When Ed, in his midlife crisis, started running around on me, I had been disappointed– it’s so clichéd–but not surprised. He left me for a younger woman, someone who worshiped him as I never could. It was his attempt to recapture his youth and acquire the acclaim and affection he felt was his due. I’d been able to accept the flaws in Ed, but he and I both knew I still saw them. I can ignore things, even fool myself, but I don’t do well with deliberate pretense. For a long time, I thought there might be something wrong with me. That I might be as frigid and passionless as Ed had accused me of being. Then Gavin came into my life and turned it upside down, made me feel again, made me care again when I had thought I could do neither. He’d made me see what I could be with the right person. I pulled my knees up, laid my head on them, and wept. As I said, I rarely cry, but I cried then. I wept for my dead parents, for my dead marriage, for my old life, for myself, and finally, I cried one more time for the me that I’d lost along the way. Then I was finished with crying. It drained me. I put my empty cup on the floor next to the couch, suddenly more tired than I’d been in weeks. I lay down staring again into the fire while visions of rifts danced in my head. The snapping of sap from the logs and mesmerizing flicker of the fire soon lulled me to sleep. ***** I dreamed of Gavin and Dancing Time and woke stiff and cold. The fire had died down so I decided to just go to bed. I returned my mug to the kitchen and felt my way down the long hallway to the bedroom. The distance seemed much longer in the dark. The dim moonlight peering through the windows only served to lengthen and darken the shadows against the walls. Loose tree limbs waving in the night breeze scratched against the sides of the cabin and windowpanes. Shuffling to avoid stubbing my toes, my progress was painfully slow. I entered the bedroom and shuffled to the adjacent bathroom to reach for the light switch and turn it on. A chill along my spine raised the hair on the back of my neck and along my arms. “Hello, Gavin.” I turned to face him. “You’re here a little sooner than I expected.” He looked good, too good. Unlike most people, he always looked better than I remembered. I felt the tug and longed to reach out to him, to touch him. I raised my chin and

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clasped my hands tightly together instead. “So what now?” He smiled and took a step toward me and stood in the doorway. I stepped back. He frowned, but didn’t come any closer. “Now? Well, now you decide how we’ll play this.” “What do you mean?” He leaned against the doorjamb and crossed his arms. “I assume you overheard Raphael and me?” “Yes.” When I didn’t elaborate, he sighed and asked, “What exactly did you hear?” “Pretty much everything I imagine. Let me see…we have to be joined to be effective against the rift that is coming sooner than everyone expected.” He nodded and I continued, “This ‘joining’ means we have to fuck, right?” He snorted at my vulgarity. “Well, at least you can say the word now.” He smiled, his eyes pleading for understanding. “Yes, it’s physical, but it’s more than that.” “Oh, yeah, right, there’s another nifty little catch. It means that whatever happens to you happens to me. If you die, I die and vice versa. Do I have that right?” He regarded me solemnly for a minute. “I’d like to think the benefits outweigh the costs.” “And I’d like to think I have a choice, but it doesn’t really matter what we want, does it?” “You do have a choice.” “I do?” “Yes, you choose when and you choose how it happens. I’ve already told Rafe that I would never, could never force you, regardless of the consequences.” He smiled seductively, sending tingles once more down my spine. “I promise you won’t regret it.” “What if I decide it’s not going to happen at all?” Another big sigh. “It’s too late for that now. It was too late before you were ever born, even before I was born.” He watched me, regret in his eyes and shrugged. “The time is now. Choosing is all that remains.” “Choose? Choose what? Choose rape or surrender? What kind of choice is that?” He moved into the room uncrossing his arms and closing his fists at his sides. I should have been afraid, but somehow I knew he’d never hurt me, not physically anyway. “It won’t be rape, Charity, but I can’t let you go. Not now. Will you come willingly? Yes, or no?” He wiped all expression from his face. “Give me your answer, Charity.” “And if I don’t?” “Then that would be a choice, wouldn’t it? Tell me, Charity. Say the word. Yes or no?” I watched his face for some sign that he’d relent, but his expression, devoid of any emotion, frightened me more than his anger ever did. Still I denied him the answer he sought. I’m nothing if not obstinate. Defiant, I lifted my chin and asked, “Why is it my choice?” His eyes glittered then with that forever glow. “Because I’ve already made mine. I made it blindly the night I left Pompeii. I made it again the first time I ever saw you, and reaffirmed it every day since then.”

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He moved toward me into my personal bubble, my personal space and loomed. I knew he was trying to use his physical size to intimidate me…and it worked. However, cutting off my nose to spite my face is a particular talent of mine. I refused to give ground or show that his closeness affected me. I tried for that anyway. “Make no mistake about it, Charity. I am yours and you are mine, no matter how long it takes for you to accept that.” He cupped my cheek and stroked it gently, brushing his thumb back and forth. His expression was the softest I’d seen it since this chase began. I didn’t make the mistake, however, of thinking I’d won any concessions. “I’ll tie you to me throughout eternity if that’s what it takes,” he murmured. I moved out of his reach and glared angrier than I remembered being in years. I had to be glowing red-hot by now every bit of my passion showing in my aura. All my life, I’d been a good girl. I’d done everything I’d been told. I just wouldn’t be that good girl any more. I couldn’t be. I have a brain, a damn good one, but no one ever let me use it. This time, I wanted to be the one in control. “Well, buster, that’s what it’s going to take.” I prepared to Step Out, but he was quicker. I’d never seen him move that fast. In fact, I didn’t actually see him move at all. I realized that he’d never let me see this ability. Maybe for just this kind of situation. His arm encircled my waist, warm and firm against the bare skin under my shirt. His other arm bound me at my upper arms across my breasts. I felt the burning in the pit of my stomach as he probed the depth of my power and captured my center. “Let go.” The pain was uncomfortable, but tolerable. I realized then that he’d been abundantly considerate up until now. I was overmatched and we both knew it. But, as I said, I’m a perverse woman. “You said you wouldn’t force me.” “And I won’t, but I can’t let you go, either. Besides, I never said I wouldn’t try and persuade you.” I stopped struggling and forced myself to remain calm. “I’ll just wait until you fall asleep you know.” He bent his head to me and whispered in my ear, “I don’t plan on going to sleep for a very long time. You won’t want to leave me by then.” I shivered at the implication of his words and the feel of his arms around me. Against my will, my nipples beaded and rubbed against the fabric of my bra, reaching toward his arm like flowers following the sun. He pulled me closer, his arm caressing my bared midriff. His scent surrounded me making me dizzy and longing to give in to what my body wanted. Why was I resisting? “Yes or no, Char?” Oh, yeah, that’s right. I was making a point. “What makes you think you can convince me?” I felt his shrug. “I see the way you watch me and I feel it in your kiss. I know because it’s the same way I watch you and the same way I kiss you. You want what I want, but you’re afraid of giving up control. Well, neither of us is in control, we never were. Still, you choose

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when and you choose how. Your choices will determine how we deal with each other from now on.” I moved out of his arms and turned to face him. I backed slowly toward the door. “Listen, Gavin, I like you…a lot, but I’m not ready for this. How about we take more time to get to know each other better?” I smiled reassuringly, trying to hide my progress toward the door, knowing I’d have to put some distance between us in order to Step Out. “No.” He wasn’t buying it. “Unfortunately, time’s up.” Scooting around me, he beat me to the door and shut it firmly then pulled a key from his jeans pocket and locked it. Facing me again, he smiled. “You left it on the counter.” He took a step toward me, close enough now to touch. “We’ll settle this now. How about I just convince you to accept what we both want anyway?” I stiffened at his arrogant assurance in his ability to seduce me and at my inability to resist his charms. I returned his sardonic smile. “How about you don’t?” He raised an eyebrow then his smile grew wider. “You doubt my ability to convince you or are you afraid that I might be right?” “I’m not afraid of anything.” He snorted. “You may not be afraid of anyone else, but you’re definitely afraid of yourself and your feelings. “ He may have been right, but it would be the last thing I’d ever admit to right then. He moved toward me again and I backed out of his way until I reached the bedroom wall next to the bathroom. He didn’t touch me, but lowered his head to my neck and inhaled slowly. “God I love your smell.” I shivered despite my best intentions and he chuckled, low and seductively. “I bet you taste just as good.” He nibbled along my collarbone and licked a path to my ear. He pulled my earlobe into his mouth and suckled while cupping my shoulders then sliding his palms lightly down my arms. I shuddered again and slipped away from him. He followed me as I backed toward the door and then pulled his shirt over his head, dropping it as he advanced. I stopped and folded my arms. He stopped and pulled up a leg one at a time to untie his shoes and remove them. “What are you doing?” He smiled. “I thought that might be obvious.” He pulled off his socks and tossed them with the rest of his clothes. I couldn’t help studying his chest, my fingers aching to explore its contours. My mouth suddenly dry, I looked at his knowing grin and swallowed convulsively. I whipped around to face the door and pulled desperately on the handle, forgetting for a moment that Gavin had locked it. He chuckled again, but though I stopped struggling with the door, I refused to turn around. “Is this what you’re looking for?” Then I did turn slowly to face him. The key dangled loosely from his fingers. I swiped

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at it. He raised his hand just above his head, out of my reach. “You wouldn’t want to leave before the fun even starts, would you?” I crossed my arms again and scowled at him. “Yes, I think I would.” He folded the key into his hand and lowered his arm. “Tsk, tsk, tsk. Let’s just remove it from temptation, shall we?” I followed the arc of the key’s path as he threw it onto the dresser, and returned my gaze to his face. His smile had changed. Unhurried, he kept his eyes locked with mine as he methodically unbuttoned his jeans. He finished and reached for me, but I darted around him and headed for the open bathroom. I almost made it through the doorway when Gavin snagged my shirt and pulled me toward him. Shades of the day we met flashed through my mind and I swiveled, twisting my hips to prevent his arm from wrapping around me. My maneuvering caused Gavin to lose his grip on my top. I spun and lost my balance at the sudden release and stumbled falling hard up against the wall. I had been in the midst of twisting around, so my right shoulder and back took the brunt of the collision. Stunned, my arms down at my sides, my palms flat against the wall to brace myself; I couldn’t escape Gavin as he trapped me between his arms. He thrust against me, front to front, sandwiching me between him and the wall. I raised my hands between us and pushed against his chest, but didn’t move him an inch. He watched my face intently as I struggled against him, but merely held me immobile, pinned against the wall. I considered kneeing him, but he slid his leg between mine pinning me firmly and preventing it. He took great pains to keep from hurting me. No, he wasn’t hurting me, he was just frustrating the hell out of me. Fastening his hands around my wrists, he pulled them from in between us and held them immobile against the wall on either side of my head. Trapped, unable to move or do any damage, I struggled a few more minutes to escape and then stilled. Frowning, I raised my eyes to his. “Well?” He smiled. “Well what?” My frown became a scowl. “Well, what now?” His smile became a smirk. “Haven’t we already been over this?” I sighed. “Okay, I give. You’re bigger, stronger, faster, and you have me good and trapped.” Quietly composed, he answered, “Yes, I do.” Between clenched teeth, I bit out, “Let me go. Now.” Instead, he lowered his head to mine. I turned away, thinking to avoid his kiss, but inadvertently gave him greater access to my neck. He bit me forcefully, but before I could complain, laved the bite with his tongue to soothe the sting, then sucked vigorously, marking me. He traveled further down and repeated the pain-pleasure torture on my shoulder. He progressed inches at a time down my body, repeating the process, but varying the

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pressure until I found myself concentrating solely on his mouth as it moved over me–his bite, his tongue, his lips. Languid warmth crept over me to weaken my knees and draw a moan from deep within. I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against the wall. My breath caught in anticipation of the pain and the promise of the pleasure, unable to break the spell. Continuing his erotic assault on my senses, Gavin released my wrists to lift my shirt up and over my head. He dropped the garment to the floor regaining hold of my wrists and pinning them over my head against the wall. “Say yes, Charity,” he whispered. His dulcet tones seeped into my bones and leached out the rigid material, turning me to putty he could mold to suit his purpose. “Say now, Charity. Don’t make me wait.” He pressed himself flush against me, his erection pushing into my belly urgently seeking a home inside. He hardened more with each labored breath he drew and sent flowing across the overly sensitized nerves behind my ears and along my neck. “Say yes, Charity. Give us what we both want.” My equilibrium failed, sending my desire careening out of control. I heard desperate mewling moans of impassioned urgency, and realized they came from me. Gavin planted delicate butterfly kisses along my jaw reaching my lips, painting them in swirling strokes and delicious nips all the while keeping my wrists imprisoned painlessly, but firmly, above us. I strained, thrusting forward, writhing against him. Teasing, luring, whipping my senses until I stood at the precipice yearning to fall over, he gave me the pressure and friction my body craved only to withdraw it, stirring the pot of my steeping emotions to a slow roiling boil. I whimpered, and he whispered against my mouth, breathing the words, “Tell me, Charity. Say the word.” He moved across my jaw and bit my earlobe, pulling and sucking, his mouth cool against my fevered skin. “Say yes, Charity.” I rode his knee seeking completion, seeking relief, seeking a bond. “Please, Gavin.” “I want to please you, Charity. Say the word.” I remained stubbornly silent, but opened my eyes and locked gazes with him. I wanted and needed something I’d never had and didn’t understand. I knew only that I found it nearly impossible to ask for help, let alone ask for what I wanted. Gavin’s look promised love and security, but I wanted more– trust and respect. Then I saw, in the depths of his forever eyes, what I’d really been seeking. He needed me as much as I needed him. He was leaving himself open and vulnerable, allowing me to accept or reject him. He risked that I would choose what I didn’t really want out of perverse obstinacy. And I might have had I not known Gavin really would not push me on this. He would keep up the pressure, but let me decide in my own time, regardless of the consequences. I marveled that in that moment, Gavin trusted me more than I trusted myself. I smiled.

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No one else had ever done that. “Yes.” God yes! “Yes?” “Yes! Show me.” Yes now. Yes here. Yes, show me what it is we both want. The decision made, I gave myself over to the passion I’d locked away years ago. The fear I’d felt at losing control was replaced by the need to connect with someone. He brought his hands under my hair, holding my neck reverently in his palms and lifted my face up to his, slowly lowering his head. I held onto his arms, needing to preserve the link to him. His lips caressed mine. Flirting, tasting, his tongue beckoned and I opened my lips to receive him. The exotic taste of his mouth, cinnamon and cloves, rolled over my tongue as smooth as old brandy. I made a foray, my tongue entwining with his. The intoxicating game shot darts of pleasure to my groin, releasing the dam. Moaning, defenseless against the erotic assault, I soaked the thong I’d managed to pull on at the outset of the drama and wished I hadn’t bothered. It was just one more thing in the way. Desperate for fulfillment, I pulled and tugged at his jeans. He seized my wrists and held them immobile again pulling his lips from our kiss and resting his forehead against mine. “Easy, Charity love, there’s only one first time, even for us.” I leaned back and looked into his forever eyes. I wanted to see those eyes lost in desire. But more than that, I wanted to gift Gavin with the loss of control to passion. Tracing his sculpted torso, I ran my hands down to his jeans and tugged them down to pull them off. I stood, my fingers playing over his chest loving the feel of contrasting hairroughened skin and his gently sloping physique. His powerful muscles contracted under my touch when I shifted my explorations to his back. Gavin held me lightly by my shoulders, not attempting to stop me, merely maintaining our bond. My tongue found its way to his nipple and I traced a path around it before pulling the small bead between my teeth to nip and suckle. His head fell back as he closed his eyes. I knelt before him. A low rumble from deep in his chest tickled my lips as I trailed kisses down the golden hair on his torso to his rigid cock. I traced the vein running down the middle of it; a salty tang greeted my questing tongue. The exotic taste mixed with his earthy aroma creating a potent cocktail. He anchored his hands in my hair and pulled me closer. Wrapping my arms around him, I licked a path around the tip of his shaft, exploring every feature. My questing fingers followed the course of his spine to the Promised Land at the base. I grasped a cheek in each hand, kneading and moving even closer, slanting my head to explore all parts of his sex thoroughly until I finally sheathed him in my mouth. Cupping his balls in one hand, I circled the base of his cock with the other. I pulled the skin tight and began a slow rhythm, licking and suckling as I moved him in and out of my mouth. This time his groan was audible. He only let me stay with my amorous pursuits for a few minutes, though, before holding me still. The taut muscles of his stomach tensed, every line firm, velvet over marble. “Oh, God, Char, don’t even breathe.” I released my hands from him, but couldn’t resist a final lick down the middle of his

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shaft. His hands jerked painfully pulling my hair. “Come here.” I looked up at his terse command. He gazed down at me, his jaw muscles working. The storm blue of his eyes had darkened to midnight, and at that moment, my only thought was that soon I’d be tied irrevocably to the object of my obsession…and he’d be tied to me. I rose and he released my hair, cradling me instead with a hand at the nape of my neck. He caressed my cheek with the back of his index finger, watching me as though seeing me for the first time. I smiled at him, and he returned the smile with none of my tentativeness. His lips, warm and beckoning, his forever eyes compelling, he pulled me toward him. “I’ve wanted this forever. I watched you grow up and weather adversity, always surviving and maintaining empathy for others, whether or not it was deserved. And through it all, your spirit shone through your eyes in spite of the pain staining your soul. I wanted that spirit, that strength for myself.” “Yeah, frumpy, conflicted, middle-aged, housewives are in short supply. And why not, we’re so very alluring.” He laughed and wrapped me in his arms, my head tucked under his chin. “And still she jokes.” His arms loosened enough so that his eyes could again meet mine. His expression grew sober. “I wanted you to be mine, to treat you the way you deserved to be treated. In all the times, in all the places, and of all the people I’ve ever met, there is nothing and no one to compare to you and that part of you I long to touch. Let me show you the magic we can make together.” I’d always thought I’d laugh at corny words like those if anyone ever had the temerity to say them to me. Again, I was wrong. The visceral ache they evoked weakened my knees and rendered me incapable of resisting… even if I had wanted to. Resist? Hell, I wanted to push him down and take him now, not wasting time getting to the bed. I wound my arms around his neck and attacked his mouth, enjoying his talented tongue in play instead of speech. His arms encircled my waist and he lifted me off my feet, carrying me to the bed. Setting me down at the foot, he lowered me to the comforter, my knees hanging over the edge. His eyes fastened on mine, trapping me in their intensity. Balancing his weight on his hands, he leaned over me, brushing his lips over mine to taste and tease, never resting for long in any position. I cupped his face in my hands to hold him still, bringing him to me for a deeper kiss. He obliged, but used his freed hands to reach my bra. Sliding his hands to my back, the bra clasp easily unfastened. He left my lips to plant light kisses along my jaws and neck and pushed my bra up and off and trapped my wrists above my head. The stubble along his jaw lightly abraded the skin under my arm and at the side of my breast as he rubbed his cheek down my side. Pulling my pants and thong down in one motion, he slipped off my shoes and pulled the entire tangled bunch of clothing off my legs and pinned my wrists again above my head, pulling my breasts taut. I shivered and my nipples tightened into puckered nubs pleading for his attention.

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Licks over the peaks teased me into further frustration. Still unable to use my hands because of his grip on my wrists, I whimpered and squirmed. He took my nipple into his mouth sucking hard then biting lightly, shooting bolts of pleasure throughout my body, my breasts at the epicenter. I arched my back and he released my wrists to cradle me, his hands spanning either side of my ribs. Finally, I could disentangle my arms and hands and touch him. Reaching him had become all-important. He turned his attention to my other nipple and the spikes of raw ecstasy hit me once more. I forgot to breathe and gasped when he nibbled gathering a complete lungful of air at one time to make up for it. I closed my eyes, immersed completely in dizzying waves of sensation; each nerve sensitive to Gavin’s every move, every touch. Like a virtuoso, his hands and mouth played me; attuned to every nuance of my body’s reaction, my heart’s desire, the hunger consuming me. I spiraled toward a fiery end. Gavin’s touch becoming both my anchor and the impetus to soar. His golden curls twined around my fingers as I grasped handfuls of his hair. My sigh became a moan and I arched my back, eager to meet his tongue on its journey down my abdomen to the other lips that wept for him. He framed my hips in his hands and spread my legs with his body. Releasing my grip on his hair, I opened my eyes to meet his. The intensity of our locked gazes was nearly painful, and heat flushed my body. Like Peter Pan having his shadow torn from him, it peeled and stripped at my walls and defenses, leaving the center of my soul exposed and vulnerable. But I knew then that I was safe with Gavin. Trust is so fucking intoxicating! It frees you to explore the hidden you, the dark, fearless you. But sex without love is like Tootsie Pops without the Tootsie Role center–good but just not as good as it should have been. Hell, you put love and trust into sex and the enthralling mixture is the closest we humans come to Heaven this side of Hell. I didn’t know if what I felt for Gavin was ‘true’ love, didn’t know if I even believed in a true love anymore or if I could feel it for anyone, but it came damn close. For now, that was enough. Gavin explored me with his mouth, his tongue tracing a fiery trail around my navel, along the crease of my legs and the folds covering my sex. I ached and pulsed in time to the rhythm he orchestrated. His hands trailed up the inside of my thighs and spread my labia with his thumbs as his tongue thoroughly explored every part of me. He fastened his mouth on my clit, sucking, stroking, bringing me to an explosive climax. He slid easily up my body and into my sheath, the slick muscles still pulsing from my orgasm. He propped himself on his elbows and captured my eyes once again. Lacing our fingers and smiling, he whispered, “Mine.” I wrapped my legs around him as he began to move. He murmured, “Finally,” and fastened his lips on mine, the salty tang of Gavin and me mingled deliciously on my tongue. I felt the pressure build again, my body moving in time to Gavin’s as I strained and reached for the climax that seemed just out of reach. I arched, increasing the angle and the

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friction. Gavin released my hands and reached between us to stroke me in time to his driving thrusts. I groaned as the orgasm built and surged over me, and Gavin thrust one final time, his shout mingling with mine as he released himself into me. The tingling began in my fingers and toes even as the pulses of my inner muscles faded. Gavin laid his head in the crook of my neck and rested most of his weight on his elbows. The tingling spread up my legs and down my arms. He stiffened and wrapped his arms around me rolling us over. I propped myself up on my hands and looked into his eyes, seeing the painful ecstasy mirrored. The burning began in my midsection again as unbidden power gathered in my center. I had to rest against his chest. My body clenched, caught in another more powerful wave, the pain and pleasure rolling along each nerve, alternately cramping and releasing them to exquisite pleasure, building to increasingly more powerful climaxes. After what seemed hours, the throbbing subsided, leaving me spent and agreeably tired. I relaxed and Gavin stroked my hair. The burning increased and spread, then dissipated leaving a sense of well-being in its place. I raised my head, looking in Gavin’s eyes. “So, that’s it then? For better or worse?” He twined a lock of my hair around his finger, and finished, “As long as we both shall live.” “Oh, my God, what have I done?” Gavin chuckled, his chest hair tickling my face. “Gee, thanks. I feel so wanted.” I pulled one of those hairs. “This is serious.” “Ouch! Yeah, it hurts.” Still buried in me, he rolled back over taking me with him to pin me under him, his arms wrapped around me, his weight supported on his elbows. I definitely couldn’t pull any chest hairs or anything else with my arms trapped between us. He watched me a moment and I found myself unable to break eye contact with him. “Having second thoughts?” I nodded. “Maybe. Maybe it’s just sinking in.” “Regrets?” I watched the emotions flicker across his face as he struggled to control them–fear, resolve, and something akin to affection. I saw too that he felt as unsure as I did, and for some reason that made me feel better. I guess I didn’t want to be the only one out of their element, the only one fearing whatever came next. I smiled at him, with what I hoped was a provocative turn to my mouth. “A few.” Gavin’s smile reflected mine. “Yeah, like what?” He lowered his mouth to my neck and planted open-mouthed kisses down to my shoulder where he nipped me gently. I shivered. “That there isn’t enough.” His kisses traced across my chest and his tongue trailed lower. “Enough what?” “Hmm?” My back arched pushing my breasts closer to his mouth. He looked up. “Enough what?”

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I saw just a hint of uncertainty in his expression. My smile widened with the returning arousal. “Just that there isn’t enough time. Even forever may not be enough.” His grin was worth every bit of pain I’d suffered, every doubt I’d had, and every tear I’d shed in the last couple of months. I’d do a lot more; suffer a lot more to see that smile. “Oh.” It was my turn to laugh. “My silver-tongued devil.” His grin appeared again and more–desire. He had that look again, that man’s look. I hadn’t seen it since the day of my change and realized he’d not been sure of me from that time until now. He’d joined with me not knowing if I’d ever really accept the situation; that I might actually leave. And I might have except for one thing–loyalty. I don’t give myself lightly in any way. Once I do, there is no going back. “You like my tongue, do you?” “Mmm-hmm. One of your best features.” That grin again. My body tightened and moisture gathered preparing me as though I didn’t just have the greatest sex of my life. My eyes fastened on his mouth. “Oh, my.” He chuckled deep and low again, nearly smirking. I looked up. “Did I say that out loud?” He laughed and nodded. I felt the blush spread and cover me. He brushed my cheek tenderly, his look touching deep inside me. I couldn’t help but groan. He covered my mouth with his, gently exploring and worshipping then moved back and swept his gaze down my body. Like a caress, I felt it cover me as he grew harder within me. I wrapped my legs around his torso as he started moving. We danced again, fulfillment still having left enough desire for another refrain. I hung onto him until my breathing returned to normal, and then straightened my legs. Gavin released me, rolling to his side next to me. I turned on my side and he spooned me, draping his arm and leg over me. I heard him faintly whisper, “Just a few minutes.” I think I gave him my pat answer, “Uh-huh,” or maybe, “Whatever,” before falling into a deep sleep…for a little while at least.

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Chapter Seven Gavin filled my night until right before sunrise when we fell into an exhausted sleep. I came awake slowly, a draft chilling my backside. He lifted the covers, pulling them completely down and off. Gavin trailed a finger down my spine followed by his tongue. I faced away from him. He swept the hair away to nibble on my ear. I shivered, but not with the cold. The cabin was toasty warm. Gavin must have turned up the heat. He had certainly turned it up in the bedroom I started to turn over, but he put a hand on my shoulder, keeping me in place. “Just stay there. Let me love you like this.” I shivered again and he chuckled, his warm breath disturbing the fine hairs on my neck. I closed my eyes, savoring the feel of his hands skimming down my sides, his mouth tasting my skin. He pulled the two pillows from under my head and lifted my hips placing the pillows under them to raise my rear. I disliked the feeling of vulnerability at first and squirmed mumbling a protest. “Shhh, Charity. It’s all right. I’m not going to hurt you.” His mouth close to my ear, he whispered, “I promise you’ll enjoy everything I do.” How could I argue with that? I’m all in favor of pleasure, especially my own. The fact that he was concentrating on me, on my pleasure, and that I couldn’t see him, made the experience intense, nearly too intense. But you only grow by stepping outside your comfort zone, so I stepped. I stepped with both feet. At first Gavin touched me with only his hands and mouth, his tongue. I felt the rough edges of his callused hands catch as he brushed over my back and shoulders, the rasp of his tongue as he followed with his mouth, biting and tasting. The moisture flowed from me wetting the pillows supporting my hips. My moans became louder as my initial discomfort at being so open was lost in the hedonistic touch of his worshipping hands and mouth. My arousal grew, the slight pressure of the pillows aiding its spread. Gavin moved to my feet and legs, stroking the inside of my thighs, suckling the pads of my toes. He traveled slowly up my legs until he reached the folds covering my sex now swollen and dripping. I froze, my body begging him to join with me. “Not yet,” I heard him whisper, and groaned at the erotic torture. The bed shifted as he straddled me. His rigid erection nestled in my cleft and spread pre-cum and my own slickness over my buttocks, and I knew he suffered as much from the teasing as I had. He covered me, sliding his hands under my body to cup my breasts. He slid easily into me, at last, and I welcomed him with a sigh. Like a warm blanket, he wrapped himself around me. The pressure built slowly as he pulled in and out. He moved a hand between my legs and spread the folds, finding my center. He matched the massaging rhythm to the tempo of his strokes until my climax seized me, spun me, and blocked out everything but the feel of Gavin moving deep inside and his moan as he followed me over. He pulled out and dropped heavily onto his back, his arm over his eyes. I managed to

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roll off the pillows, our combined sweat drying on my back; cool now that Gavin no longer covered me. I seriously considered going back to sleep, but Gavin sat up and asked, “Shower first, and then breakfast?” I grunted, and kept my eyes closed. He laughed. “Breakfast first?” “You cooking?” “Okay. What’s there to cook?” “Canned ham, powdered eggs, pancakes, and coffee.” “Mmm, sounds yummy,” he muttered sarcastically. I laughed at that and sat up. “And I take a shower.” He threw the pillows out from between us and rolled over, grabbing me, forcing me to lie back down as he covered me. He supported his weight on his elbows and looked into my eyes. “We shower together. Wouldn’t want to waste water.” “Somehow I don’t think showering together will save much water.” “We shower together.” “Okay, okay. Whatever you say, Tarzan. We shower together.” “Good.” He gave me a quick peck and left the bed grabbing his jeans and pulling them up, leaving them unbuttoned as he walked into the kitchen. I got out of bed and rooted around in the dresser drawers. I found an old pair of my daughter’s cutoffs and a tank top, and slipped them on before padding out to the kitchen. I was starving and even the army surplus food smelled good. I slid my arms around Gavin as he stood over the stove cooking. He covered my arms with one of his and I squeezed, laying my head against his back. There’s just something so sexy about a big he-man getting all domestic. “Mmm, smells good.” He laughed. “You must be hungrier than I thought.” “Mmm, I’m not talking about the food.” He turned off the stove and set the spatula down in the pan, and turned to lifted me under my thighs. I wrapped my arms around him and braced myself against his shoulders. “Shower first,” Gavin murmured before snaring my lips. We did manage to shower and eventually eat breakfast. Even the powdered eggs tasted good. ***** For all Gavin’s experience, he still had never learned how to ‘veg’, so I had to teach him how modern man had perfected the art of wasting time. First, we hiked to the dock near the cabin that jutted into the small man-made lake to fish. We used bits of Spam as bait, though Gavin offered to dig for worms. I showed him how to cast out into the lake, then sit and wait. We didn’t catch much, but I did learn that he had been a Roman slave when Raphael

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plucked him out of Pompeii, which explained his Celtic looks. He asked about my life, though he’d seen much of it from the outside and in frozen tableaus. It was strange that I’d never noticed him, but that would have been a bad thing, I suppose, with the possibility of changing the future and all. “Gavin, does it ever get old? Do you ever come to the point where’s there’s nothing left to do or know?” He smiled fondly as he thought. “I keep learning and so will you. What we don’t yet know remains infinite. Likewise there’s no cap on improving our skills.” We had another hike planned for later, but afternoon showers kept us inside. We cuddled by the fire and created our own blaze. Gavin was insatiable and I seemed equally as ravenous. We had just finished another shower after a couple bowls of Spaghetti-Os and noticed a note on the kitchen table. Gavin picked it up and remarked, “Well, at least he didn’t stay to greet us personally. I’m not sure whether he or you and I would have been more embarrassed.” “Who?” I picked up the note which was signed ‘R’. Raphael. Gavin snorted. “Who else?” He watched as I read the note. “Well?” Okay Kids, Playtime is over. I’ll see you by 9:00am or you’ll see me at 9:01am. Love, R Gavin laughed. “So what has to be done here before we leave? I say we return tonight and wake him up. He hates that.” The thought of irritating Raphael almost made up for having to return to real life. “Just the linen and dishes. Oh, and the fireplace needs to be cleaned out. Heck, it just has to look like no one has been here.” He pulled me to him. “Heck, huh? What a good girl you are.” I melted into him. “Mmm, maybe I could show you just how good I can be.” “I think I’d like that.” We woke Raphael four hours later; just to make sure he knew we had gotten back safely. I’d never before heard Raphael use a single one of the words he uttered at us right then. And I’m still not sure what he threw at the door Gavin had hastily closed. ***** You’d think with the nookie we’d shared and the soul mate thing and all, Gavin would ease up on the Task Master part. Well, if you did, then we’d both have been wrong. If anything, he was worse. In fact, I think he was going for Asshole of the Year. He had my vote. We began each day now learning about auras and reading them. My aura tended to

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stay toward the reddish side of the spectrum, especially when Gavin was near. He tried teaching me to control my aura by controlling my emotions. Control my aura and control my power. Orange was about the best I could manage most of the time. “Charity, you’ve got to control it.” “I’m trying, Gavin. You think I like doing this over and over?” “I figured you must.” “Kiss my ass.” He came up behind me and wrapped his arms loosely around me as I struggled to reach for my center. I was exhausted from the extra hours we had already put in that day. “Later,” he promised. His husky whisper sent shivers cascading along my arms and the back of my neck. He released me and smacked me on the rear. “But that’s later. Right now, concentrate.” I heard Raphael’s low chuckle coming from the porch and turned to glare at him. He only laughed harder. I saw and felt the angry dark red pour and stream off me. I knew I’d had it for the day and stomped off toward the house. “Charity, where are you going? We haven’t finished.” “We may not have finished, but I have!” I mounted the stairs to the room Gavin and I now shared, yanking off clothing and dropping a trail on my way to the shower, knowing that it would really piss off Mr. Neat Freak. I jammed on the water and tugged off my boots, socks and pants while the water warmed up. Stepping under the steaming water, I braced my arms against the front wall of the shower stall letting the water pound over me, opening pores and soothing aches and pains. I closed my eyes, raised my face into the flow, and thought about nothing for the first time in hours. I heard the shower door open as a draft hit me. Opening my eyes and steeling myself for the lecture I was sure would come, I jumped when Gavin’s arms wrapped around me instead. He pulled me against him, his cock pressing against my back, his damp scent surrounding me. Ambivalent, I stiffened in response waiting for him to chastise me for my behavior outside. He cupped my breasts then moved a hand down to cup my mound and whispered, “Forgive me.” I waited, surprised at his words. “I forget myself and push too hard.” I melted and leaned back into him, raising my arms to touch him behind me, tunneling my fingers through his baby-fine curls as he kissed my shoulder and neck. “And I don’t push hard enough,” I answered. He rolled a nipple between his fingers of one hand while gently massaging between my legs with the other. “Now comes the makeup sex?” “Uh-huh, and you can push as hard as you want,” I managed to groan before giving in to the delicious feelings he invoked. “Mmm.” His embrace tightened, the delicious contrast between the heat pouring off him surrounding me and the pulsing steam from the shower added and heightened the excitement

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rolling over me. I clutched his hair tighter, wanting to pull him around me, and fastened my lips to his over my shoulder. The kiss deepened, the water cooled, and Gavin moved both hands over and down my body stroking and caressing, exploring and fondling. He teased, bringing me to the edge several times and leaving me there until I wanted to scream with frustration and beg him to finish. My body ached for Gavin to slide inside and fill the emptiness. He grew harder against my back until he finally spread my legs, slid fully into me, and abruptly stopped moving. He broke our kiss and wrapped his arms more securely around me, preventing me from moving while he gathered control. I whimpered in frustration so close to an orgasm a little nudge, a little pressure would send me over. Gavin leaned back against the shower wall pulling me with him lifting me nearly off my feet. He held me immobile while he withdrew slowly, almost completely out to plunge in again the shock waves thrillingly new each time. He thrust twice, and the third time my climax seized me, sending my mind elsewhere for the duration. A few minutes later, I felt my inner walls pulse and milk an orgasm from him despite his best efforts to delay it further. The warm spray hitting me outside played in concert to the throbbing from Gavin as he found his own release. He groaned loudly in my ear, biting out his words between clenched teeth, “You feel too fucking good, Char!” He laughingly added, “And fucking you feels too good.” He sat on the foot-wide ledge surrounding the shower keeping me connected, splayed my legs over his, leaning back against the far wall. I closed my eyes and rested against him, echoes of my climax still playing over me. The problem with perfect moments like these, besides being too few and far in between, is that eventually the real world intrudes and writes over the interlude with the nasty business of living. But, for now at least, we savored our piece of perfection. If we’re lucky, these are the times we’re able to take out and examine at the end of our lives and chain together to make the ‘good old days’ into our own version of history. ***** What would you do with two thousand years of waiting time? Learn to ski? To paint? Memorize every line of Monty Python? Most of us would like to think that we’d do something useful or noble, but knowing me, I would have wasted at least one thousand of years frivolously. Gavin didn’t seem to have that problem. I still explored every chance I got, just as I had when I’d overheard the discussion on joining. Since there were only three fulltime residents, plenty of rooms went unused in what amounted to a mansion. Sheets covered the furniture and heavy drapes kept out damaging sunlight and, of course, curious and prying eyes. One large airy room contained almost no furniture but did have a wall of picture windows as well as a sizeable skylight. Partially complete sculptures and busts competed for

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space with easels containing paintings in various stages of completion. A grand piano, uncovered and well polished, dominated one corner of the room. Music sheets lay scattered around on stands and any flat surface. Paints, clay, and stacks of completed canvases populated the remaining space. Moist towels covered the incomplete busts. I unwrapped a couple, surprised to find what looked to be my likeness at various ages. Several similar, but completed sculptures, busts, and other statuary also lay about. Raphael and other subjects as well as embarrassingly accurate whole body statues of my naked form stood out in the open for anyone to see. I gathered extra cloths and draped them strategically around. The paintings were even more vivid and compelling. Though these were just as explicit as the statues, something makes two-dimensional representations less intimidating than threedimensional. Once I recovered from the initial surprise at seeing the subject of the paintings, I enjoyed studying the color and composition. The exquisite pieces evoked feelings of passion and desire. Somehow, I knew that the artist who created the beauty along the balustrade was the same who created these lovely pieces–Gavin. I wondered over to the piano and looked at the compositions lying there. I hadn’t played in years, but I could still read music. I attempted a couple lines of melody and heard enough to know it was good. In another corner of the room under a heavy cover, a pile of hand-carved wooden weapons, tools and artwork lay organized on stands and easels. The tools and weapons looked recently fashioned but contained the feel of antiquity, each piece shiny with wax. I ran my hand over a long bow, the slick, cool wood a sensuous experience on its own. “It took me two months to carve that piece. Probably a long time to spend on something that has no practical use anymore.” I looked up at Gavin, into his midnight eyes, and returned his smile. “It’s beautiful. They’re all beautiful. That’s reason enough.” His grin widened as he walked toward me. He bent to kiss me, just a brush, and I melted as I always do, my body already readying itself for him. Turning into him, I wrapped my arms around him. I forgot again, for a short time, that the world contained more than just the two of us. He lifted his head and I opened my eyes, his smile never failing to warm me from the inside. “So, what are you doing in here?” I shrugged. “Exploring.” He released me and I walked coyly around the room, stopping here and there to stroke various works of art. He chuckled. “What’s the verdict?” I lifted a particularly explicit portrait out of a stack of paintings and examined it closely. “I think that I hope to God this is your work and not Raphael’s.” He laughed heartily and walked to me, wrapping his arms around me from behind. “Yes, they’re all mine. I’m hoping you’ll consent to model in person for me.” I leaned back into him and pulled his arms tighter around me. “At least I don’t have to die of embarrassment.”

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“And the modeling?” “Hmm. Maybe we can work out a reciprocal arrangement.” “Do you sculpt or paint?” “Nope. Not even a little. Does it matter?” His seductive smile and enthusiastic kiss was answer enough. ***** I asked about the servants several times, but Raphael and Gavin still ignored me or avoided answering. Not one to let something go, I decided to track and snare the illusive three. Gavin and Raphael really should have figured I would. I thought the cook would be the easiest to find. I simply told Gavin I was going in for a shower. I neglected to tell him I as planning to meet the servants first. Mary was friendly and just as curious about me as I was about her. She’d been working for Raphael for over ten years now and planned on retiring at the end of the year. She told me that the maid’s name was Marie and the handyman’s name was Joseph, Mary’s husband. All three servants were hired together and were retiring together. Mary didn’t know any further back than the last set of servants, their predecessors whom she’d never met. All of them had also retired together after about ten years. Raphael must not want questions about what we did and why we didn’t age. I got it. He could have just said, “Charity, I don’t want anyone knowing who we are or what we do.” But no, let’s make it all cloak and daggery. He forced me to investigate, don’t you think? I talked to her a few minutes then went to meet Joseph. Mary let me know he was working outside along the driveway. The ‘estate’ was a full square mile, but I couldn’t really picture it. All I know is I couldn’t see any neighbors. Rolling hills full of scrub pine and various cacti surround the house, which had been built up on a hill to avoid flash flooding. In the distance, I could see a mesh wire fence and I wondered if it was electrified. If so, to keep people out or in? Close behind the fence was a bougainvillea hedge, effectively blocking sight of the buildings for anyone on the other side. A long, winding dirt drive led to the house from a tall wrought iron gate. Juniper bushes lined the driveway, all uniformly trimmed and lushly green, making the landscape less stark. Joseph was busily trimming these when I found him. His clippers stopped in mid-clip as he eyed me warily. “Howdy, Joseph. Your wife Mary told me you’d be here. I just thought I’d come and meet you. My name’s Charity. I’m staying with Gavin and Raphael.” I stuck out my hand forcing him to shake it or be rude. He looked like he might opt for rude for a second as he eyed my hand suspiciously. Slowly he put the clippers into his left hand and shook my right. I rewarded him with a bigger smile. “It looks like you do gardening along with handyman type stuff.” He looked at the bush in front of him and nodded. “Raphael know you’re out here?” I looked at the house and back at him. “I sincerely doubt I’d be out here if he did.” He grinned at me then got back to his trimming. “Mind if I trim while we chat? I need to finish this one before sunset.”

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“Sure. I don’t want to interfere.” I walked around the hedges trying to find a difference. “What is it exactly you’re trimming and how can you tell when you’re finished?” He kept clipping. “I can just tell.” “Hmm.” Sounds like Raphael. “Well, that’s my cue to leave. Nice meeting you, Joseph.” “Same here.” Dusk had arrived, so I decided to try to find Marie. I started getting this tingly feeling between my shoulders, so Gavin must have been trying to find me. I’d have to hurry before he did. I walked in and tried moving stealthily. I guess I failed because Raphael called to me. He sat in his usual chair apparently communing with whomever or whatever he communed with. “What’s up Rafe?” I thought I’d try brazening it out. He raised a single eyebrow and then pointed toward the stairs. “She’s changing linens in your old bedroom.” I stared at him. “Uh, who?” “Marie.” “Okay, thanks.” I started up the stairs. “Oh, and Charity?” I paused. “Yes?” “Gavin is looking for you and he’s not pleased. You might want to take the back way up.” “I will. Thanks.” More about Raphael was scary than just his eyes. I hurried to take the back stairs through the kitchen. Mary didn’t even look up. Marie had just finished the bed and was coming out of the room, her arms filled with linens. She froze looking terrified when she noticed me. “Marie?” She nodded. “I’m Charity.” She bit her bottom lip and looked around as though trying to find a bolthole or something. “Listen, Marie, you don’t have to worry about getting into trouble. Raphael knows I’m talking to you. He even told me where I could find you.” Her eyes opened wider. “He did?” “Yeah.” She smiled then. Gavin and Raphael’s voices drifted upstairs and I knew it wouldn’t be long before Gavin came up here to look for me. “Well, I’ve got to get going, but I wanted to meet you. We’ll have to chat later.” “Yes, Ma’am.” “Please, call me Charity.” “Okay, Charity.”

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I smiled and hurried toward our bedroom door. “Charity!” Uh, oh, busted. I didn’t need to turn around and see Gavin to know he was upset, but I turned anyway. “Yes, Gavin?” Innocent but bold was the way to play it. “Don’t ‘Yes, Gavin’ me. You deliberately lied to me.” I put my hands on my hips and glared. “I didn’t lie to you.” “Oh, no? You said you were going to shower.” He set his hands on his hips and glared back. “And I am. Right now as a matter of fact.” “Okay, so you didn’t lie, you deliberately misled me. You have no idea how worried I was when I couldn’t find you.” I hadn’t considered that he’d be worried. Guilt hitched up my chin and obstinacy kept me from apologizing. “If you and Raphael would stop acting like some kind of secret society and just answer my questions, I wouldn’t have to skulk around finding out what I want to know.” Gavin glanced down the hallway, but Marie had already disappeared. He stepped forward and lowered his voice, his hands balled into fists at his sides. “We’re protecting the servants as well as ourselves and our privacy.” “You think I would hurt someone?” “Not deliberately. Why can’t you just accept that after all these centuries, we might just know what’s best?” I lowered my voice and balled my hands into fists. “And after all these centuries, you two know everything, right?” “I didn’t say that.” “Didn’t you? You watched me and my life for forty-two years, yet you still thought I’d put up with being patronized for my own good.” We glared at each other for a few minutes and I stormed back toward the staircase. “Where are you going?” Had he heard a word I said? “Dinner. It’s too late for a shower now.”

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Chapter Eight I descended the stairs and started across the living room where Raphael stood by the fireplace. I ignored him and headed for the dining room. “Charity?” I stopped but didn’t turn around or speak. “I’d like to apologize.” That got me turning and looking at him. “For what?” He crossed to me. “For not treating you as an equal.” Somewhere in the depths of Raphael’s eyes, I saw the compassion of ages and the pain it cost him. I’ve never understood Raphael, but every once in awhile I caught glimpses of his soul and insight into his true nature. I smiled. “Not a problem.” He smiled as well, but sadness stole its spark. “Obviously that’s not quite true, but for my part, it won’t happen again.” I nodded and turned to go. “Oh, and Charity?” I stopped and turned around. “Yes?” “He really was worried about you.” I cringed. “I know.” He chucked me under the chin. “Cut him some slack. It’s painful for an old dog to learn new tricks.” “And sometimes for a new one as well,” I added. He laughed. “Yes, I guess so.” I started for the dining room again, and remembered I hadn’t washed up yet. A restroom sat right next to the living room. I quickly washed and dried my hands not wanting anyone to come looking for me again. I opened the door and stopped when I heard Gavin’s voice. “She just seems so vulnerable at times that I want to protect her, use every bit of strength I have to keep her away from harm.” “Gavin, she’s not a child, she’s your partner. Luckily, you’re not the only one to misjudge and underestimate her. That will be your ace in the hole. You’ll see. She is your strength, just as you are hers. Learn to accept this, really accept this, and you’ll be a much happier man.” I waited until they left for the dining room before leaving the restroom. As I entered the dining room, both men rose. “Sit down. I just had to wash up.” “Cleanliness is next to godliness…and the living room,” Raphael remarked and winked at me. Was there nothing this man missed? I laid my hands on Gavin’s shoulders and kissed his cheek. “Sorry. I’ll try and let you know where I’m going.” I sat in the chair next to him. “Unless you

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piss me off.” He had a roll halfway to his plate and seemed to have forgotten what he was doing. I smiled at his confused expression. “Are you finished with the rolls?” I nodded at the breadbasket in front of him. He put his roll down and passed me the basket. “So, are we making up now?” I looked at him and glanced at Raphael who was trying to pretend he had no ears. “Not until you say ‘That’s alright, dear. I know I’ve been an ass and I promise not to treat you like an ignorant prisoner in your own home again’. Then we can make up after dinner. I do still need a shower after all.” Raphael choked on the water he’d been drinking. Gavin remained impassive and ignored Raphael. “How about I accept your apology, give you mine, and I’ll try and treat you like an adult and not piss you off too often?” I smiled and gave him my hand to shake. “Deal.” He took it and kissed the back, his eyes fixed on mine. Raphael watched our byplay, an indulgent smile on his lips. Gavin and I ate companionably for a couple minutes before I noticed that Raphael still sat silently watching us. “Raphael?” He looked up at me. “Is something wrong?” He didn’t answer, but looked at Gavin his eyebrows raised, his head tipped slightly to one side. Gavin nodded at him and put his utensils down. I frowned as he rose and walked quietly to the dining room entrance. He checked the other side facing the hall to the kitchen and leaned up against the wall, his arms crossed his focus on the entrance. “What’s going on?” “Charity,” Raphael started solemnly, “there’s another precaution we take with the servants.” “Yeah? Do you hypnotize them or something?” Gavin chuckled and Raphael glared at him. “You’re not helping.” He turned back to me, his expression characteristically blank. “In a way.” “In what way?” “In the way that they’ve worked nearly twenty years for us, but only remember the last decade.” I blinked at him. “How?” Raphael’s inscrutable smile appeared again. “It’s just one of those things I do.” “Because it’s your job?” I asked wryly. His smile went from inscrutable to amused. “Yes.” “But what about their lives, their memories, their families?” Raphael waived a hand nonchalantly. “Oh, I never choose people with any ties. And if, by some chance they develop any ties

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outside the household they wouldn’t be here anymore. But that’s never happened. It’s my job to know the right people to pick.” “Rafe,” Gavin warned and returned to the table moments before Marie brought in a sliced chocolate cake. She looked at the food-laden table and frowned in confusion. “Is everything alright Mr. Raphael?” “Everything is fine, Marie. We’re just slow tonight.” She nodded and set the cake down, returning to the kitchen. “Well,” Raphael asked, “shall we eat?” ***** We trained alone most of the time I think to get a rhythm going between us. Not that Gavin and I ever had much trouble getting a rhythm going. We did work with other Dancers occasionally, though. My favorites were Brent, Tracey, and Penelope–who preferred to be called Penny. I think it was because they were closest in age to me, my real age, and had only been Dancers for a few years. Neither Brent nor Tracey had partners. Their soul mates hadn’t been born or weren’t Dancers yet. However, I couldn’t help but wonder. They Danced together and I got vibes from them that said they did a lot of other things together. No one seemed as curious– okay as nosy–as I was, so I’d have to ask the couple myself if I wanted any more information. Penny had Marcus, a very proper person, who got along well with Gavin. Now that was an odd friendship considering Marcus had been a Roman Centurion and I knew Gavin had been a slave to the Romans. However, being born in the same millennium seemed to bring people closer together, a common point of reference, it seems. The others, Brendan and Sharon, had been married in their previous lives. Having come from Ireland during Cromwell’s time, they had a lilt every once in awhile in their voices. They’d always known each other. More than any other couple, they typified two halves of a whole. It was as though one breathed in and the other breathed out, neither able to complete the cycle without the other. I asked Gavin why they weren’t the ones to heal the rift everyone knew was coming. We were sitting on the porch taking a break. Gavin covered my hand with his. “Just as there is a single soul mate for each Dancer, for each couple there comes a single unique rift they alone were born to heal. Brendan and Sharon had theirs during World War 1. Penny and Mark healed one after Nagasaki and Hiroshima.” Allen, the other Dancer in the group, was sullen and standoffish. I couldn’t imagine anyone ever matching him in any fashion. “Charity, how much do you think you and Gavin are alike?” Rafe asked me at dinner one night after about the umpteenth time I’d complained about Allen, which, I think, might have been every time I’d seen him. “Alike how?” “How many personality traits do you have in common? How often do you approach a problem, or people, or anything in the same manner? How much alike are your temperaments?”

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Gavin looked at me and winked, then continued eating. “Well, except that we’re both stubborn, we’re more or less opposites.” “Gavin has always been strong-willed, he couldn’t have survived otherwise. You need him to be that way to firm up your own resolve. You two aren’t really opposites. You’re complements. Together you make a whole stronger than the sum of each of your–synergy.” I could see his point. “Okay. You’re probably right. What brought this up?” “Cut Allen some slack. His mate has just been born, so he’s about to complete his over five hundred year wait. She’ll be sunny, personable, and all too trusting. She’ll help Allen learn to open up and trust others and he’ll protect her from her own innate naiveté.” Raphael went back to his own dinner and I watched the two men eat while I grew defensive and downright huffy. I even opened my mouth a couple of times to justify my irritation with Allen, but stopped and chewed it over some more. Raphael had a point, whether I liked it or not, so after a couple minutes, I shrugged and said, “Sure, why not. It’s no skin off my nose,” and went back to my own dinner. Both men stopped eating and looked at me curiously. It’s not as if I can’t admit when I’m wrong, or when someone has a point. Geesh! “What?” They returned to their dinners. ***** One hundred degree plus days did have their charm. Gavin took off his shirt to train. Oh, yeah, drooling pretty much interfered with my training session after that, not to mention my attention being totally and completely occupied with the view. We’d been doing the Tai Chi / Yoga thing, as Gavin was adamant about my learning to concentrate under physical stress. We took a little break to get a drink and Gavin ran the hose to let it cool down, then stripped off his shirt and soaked his head. He shook off and I just stood there, watching the show as drops glistened across his shoulders and chest. I followed the path of a single drop as it trailed down his abdomen and disappeared into the waistband of his pants. That’s when I lost a few points off my I.Q. and the drooling commenced. “Charity, let’s see if we can try that last sequence again. It seems to be helping.” He turned the water off and walked back to the mats lying under the awning in the lush rye grass. I watched his back as he walked away, the muscles playing just under the skin. Oh, baby, all that luscious, barely leashed power…and all mine. He sat down facing me and stretched. “Come on, Charity. We’re burning daylight, babe.” It was an hour or so until sundown. I licked my lips, my eyes now fastened on his face as I moved toward him. I decided I’d like to try a different type of exercise. I reached his mat and he looked up. I knew my back was to the low riding Sun and shaded my expression from him, but he was a smart boy. He’d get the message eventually.

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“Charity?” He shaded his eyes to see me better. “Is something…” He got it. His eyes blazed and I moved, my face no longer hidden, and looked pointedly at his crotch. His reaction was immediate and obvious. He started to stand, but I put my bare foot in the middle of his chest pushing him back so he rested on his elbows and I stood over him, straddling his body. My hands on my hips, I smiled down at him, his wicked return smile a reflection of my own. I went to my knees to sit across his lap, riding his arousal and letting every carnal thought I had show in my eyes as my hands played over the muscles of his chest and sides. Neither of us smiled any more. I licked my lips slowly, drawing his attention to my mouth. I licked his bottom lip, then his top lip, before moving to his jaw and neck. He groaned and let his head drop back. I continued to his chest, my tongue licking a swirling pattern to first one nipple and then the other. I sprinkled biting and suckling along the way for variety. Raising my head, I waited for him to look at me again. Keeping my eyes on his, I pulled off my top and slowly slipped off my athletic bra. Gavin laid his upper body down to reach for me, but I caught his wrists and pushed them on the mat next to his head. My breasts brushed against his chest, his hair rubbing against my sensitive nipples. I was well aware that this time my smile was wholly feral. Gavin’s eyes glittered with barely contained excitement, our new game pushing all the right buttons for him and for me, too. In fact, buttons were getting pushed I didn’t know I had. I lowered my head to his, covering his lips with mine. Rocking myself against his swollen shaft, I kissed him, exploring his mouth with my tongue. He struggled a little trying to use his hands, but I kept mine firmly on his wrists and chuckled wickedly at his efforts. “Ah, ah, ah. I call this dance.” “Fuck, Charity.” “I plan on it, but that’s the entrée and we’re still on the appetizer.” He laughed at that. “You’re the cook.” With my lower body pressed firmly against him, my hips writhing over his. He got harder and I got wetter. Kissing my way down his stomach, I pulled his pants and briefs down and off. He reached toward me again. “Gavin, if you touch me without permission, I’ll stop.” Okay, empty threat, but it worked. His hands dropped, but he propped himself on his elbows again to watch. I moved down his body licking around his straining cock. Muscles in his abdomen jumped as I trailed my tongue along the crease between his legs and body. I looked in his eyes then licked the precum from the head of his shaft. His eyes narrowed and he licked his dry lips. I trailed a finger over his taut stomach then grasped him gently to take his cock completely in my mouth. He groaned and lay back completely. Cupping his sac and squeezing gently, I swirled my tongue over the sensitive area under the head and sucked as I moved him in and out of my mouth, tasting the clean salty flavor of him. After a few minutes of my undivided attention, I felt him stiffen, his breathing

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labored and I knew he was on the edge. He groaned, “Charity, I’m going to…” I put a finger to his lips to stop his unnecessary warning and stroked more emphatically with my tongue. I lapped up the warm eruptions that filled my mouth and gently licked off any that remained. Gavin lay spent, his eyes closed and covered by an arm, his body loose and relaxed. Kissing my way back up his body, I rolled to my side lying next to him, an arm and a leg draped possessively over him. There’s something to be said for down time. It’s every bit as necessary as practice. Several silent minutes passed and I thought Gavin might have fallen asleep. “I was married once, you know.” Okay now, that was a surprise. “No, I didn’t know.” “I had two sons, too.” I propped myself on an elbow and looked down at him, his eyes still closed and covered. He’d never really talked much about himself. I didn’t want to scare him off by asking too many questions. Men really hate sharing their inner workings. It’s as though they’re afraid that the more you know, the more ammunition you’ll have to use against them. Hmm…they may have a point. I had to ask anyway, “What happened to them?” He moved his arm off his eyes and opened them, staring into the distant past. “I grew up knowing my place in life, that I’d be a warrior like my father and his father before him. When you’re young, you feel invulnerable. Being undefeated in battle just adds to the sense of invincibility." He paused, looking at me with a smile. “I fought with the Iceni queen, Boudicea. Ever hear of her?” I nodded. I really do kick ass in Trivial Pursuit. I know all sorts of trivial things. Of course, that’s nothing like actually living through them. “She was the one who led a revolt against the Romans for treating her and her daughters as badly as the Romans treated most of their own women.” Gavin snorted. “Yes, well and succinctly put.” He turned his laughing eyes to look in mine. “You remind me of her.” Now I was indignant. “Wasn’t she red-haired and like six foot?” He chuckled and laid his hand along my cheek. “Not in looks, although the same fire burns in your eyes as in hers. Neither of you knew how to give up.” “Yes, stubbornness seems to be a trait–or character flaw, depending on how you look at it–in many of us Celts.” He sighed, dropping his hand and stared into the distance again, his face haunted by the sad shadows of his past. “Yes, it does. Sometimes to our detriment.” I watched him for moment then asked, “What happened to your family?” He looked at me, smiling sadly. “Moira wasn’t like you. She was more like a fragile flower.” “Gee, thanks. Your wife?”

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He nodded. “Actually, that’s just how I saw her. It turns out she really was more a dandelion than a rose. She survived everything life threw at her and even thrived at the end. You know what happened to the Iceni after the revolt?’ “They were enslaved or killed—virtual genocide. The Romans made an example of you, a reminder of the perils of rebellion.” “Yes, we were. I was home at the time. Wounded weeks before, I’d pretty much been lamed in one leg, my left. When the Romans attacked our village, my wife managed to grab our youngest son, Eavan, and hide in the stables. They were still captured and taken for slaves. My oldest boy, though only ten, grabbed my sword and ran out to defend his family and village. He had your fire and stubborn determination and he died because of it.” He stared, smiling sadly again. I could tell he’d been proud of his son, of his son’s stubborn and futile act of self-sacrifice. “What was his name?” He looked into my eyes steadily watching me. “Ian.” “Ian, like my son?” He nodded. “Ironic isn’t it?” “What happened to everyone else?” “I heard that Eavan died on the trip to Rome and Moira became a concubine for some Roman senator.” “How awful for her.” “Not really. She was a pampered mistress and ended up with more children, her own family–a replacement.” “You don’t sound resentful.” “No. I’d known Moira most of my life. We grew up together. She just did what she’d always done and made the best of whatever life threw at her. If anything, I envied her ability to put the past behind her in a way I never could.” “Parents shouldn’t outlive their children.” I laughed at the irony in that statement. "Guess we don’t have much of a choice, though, do we?” “Charity, you can’t ever take a chance again and visit your children.” I sighed. “I understand, Gavin.” Well, there’s understanding and then there’s agreeing. He tilted my face toward him and pressed a quick kiss against my lips. I frowned and asked, “What happened to you? How’d you end up in Pompeii?” He shrugged. “Don’t ask me why they didn’t just kill me outright like they’d done with most of the men of my village. I was too lame for the games or for fieldwork, but I proved useful with horses and making tools and weapons. My master found my ingenuity beneficial and I ran his household for the last ten years of the fifteen that I was enslaved.” “You didn’t try to get free? You just gave up?” He pulled me on top of him and slid his fingers through my hair, cupping my head in his palms. “Not for a minute. I kept on living, didn’t I?” I ran my thumb along his bottom lip and he pulled the digit into his mouth. I smiled into the azure blue of his eyes. “For which I’m eternally grateful.”

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The fond amusement ignited in his eyes. Like a moth to a flame, I found myself, as I always did, unable to resist the fire. I rarely tried to resist anyway, and never for very long. His hands firmly in my hair, he slanted his mouth across mine and explored hungrily. He rolled us over and quickly pulled off my pants and thong, while kissing me breathless. The lethargy of the late afternoon quickly dissipated and I found myself eager to taste Gavin again. I figured he had decided to control the pace of our lovemaking now, but that wasn’t any kind of hardship. Because although I didn’t want to hear the details, his longevity had given him enough time to acquire an impressive amount of skill. ***** We spent a lot of time in Death Valley. The closer to the summer it became, the hotter the days. By comparison, Phoenix at night was refreshingly cool. The Earth, like everything else in the universe, has its own places through which travel between frames is easiest. These happen to coincide with the vortex sites, the places of Harmonic Convergence, like Sedona, Arizona, Stonehenge, the Bermuda Triangle, and of course Death Valley. A couple weeks after Gavin and I joined, I went off on my own to heal a small tear. Light bubbled slowly from a foot long crack that sat about eye level. It had probably been forming less than a month. These global soft spots are rife with rifts. Gavin was around somewhere if I needed him, but he said I would learn faster on my own. I did enjoy Dancing alone every once in awhile, but that day just felt weird. Apprehensive, I was not at all anxious to be alone. Before I left, Gavin had kissed me goodbye and whispered, “Charity, you’re stronger than you know.” I considered his odd remark and answered, “Okay, thanks, I guess.” He smiled indulgently and left to check conditions further along in the valley. He promised that someday I’d know how to sense a growing rift, too. I wondered if someday I’d be as strange as he was. I healed the small rift quickly and neatly, the whole time feeling the oppressive weight of many eyes on me. I turned in a circle searching for the source of the unease, but I saw nothing. I mean literally nothing. I knew it was probably those horrid little demons, but they didn’t usually hide. I kicked around in the dirt for a minute, wondering when Gavin might pop back. I guess I could have returned home or to where Gavin should have been, but just then a figure walked into view. At first, I thought it might be Gavin, but Gavin wouldn’t have come walking from so far away. I shaded my eyes and watched as two other figures flanked the first and followed him or her. I wasn’t very concerned. I knew I could Step Out quickly and there wasn’t anything very menacing about the three, at least not from that distance. I folded my arms and waited, forcing myself to remain calm and motionless. I could make out their faces enough to see they were exceptionally beautiful. The lead figure was a female and the two flanking her males. The female was at least five foot ten and both men

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were a couple inches over six foot. They all had curly, blond hair like Gavin’s. When they drew near enough, I saw that the leader had light blue eyes similar to Raphael’s and the men had dark brown. All three dressed in white down to their deck shoes. “That’s far enough, guys.” I didn’t want them within touching distance of me; but I did want to satisfy my curiosity about them. They all stopped and the female said, “Whatever makes you comfortable, Charity.” So they knew me. I felt more apprehensive than flattered. I looked them up and down carefully. “Let me guess…demons?” They looked genuinely surprised, and I laughed. “Come on, guys, nobody that good looking could be anything but evil. And you’re dressed in white to boot. How anti-clichéd can you get?” “You’ll have to excuse us. We never expected you to be both beautiful and so intelligent.” I snorted. “You’ll have to do better than that. Even Gavin can sling better bullshit.” “Thank you, dear.” I jumped and turned around, not having heard Gavin’s approach. “Could you sneak up on me a little louder, please?” “Sorry. I thought these three or someone like them might visit if I left you alone a bit.” Gavin stood next to me now and crossed his arms. “Charity, meet Lilith, Asmodai, and Belial.” “Ah, the Higher Echelon of the Underworld.” I surprised them again, but not Gavin. “You do know so many surprising things.” “Gavin, I told you—” “I know. You kick ass at Trivial Pursuit.” I grinned. “Hey, I even played Rafe to a draw and I got half the answers from that eclectic library of his. By the way, we need some nice romances or at least mysteries. Some Raymond Chandler or even Louis L’Amour.” “Cowboys?” Gavin faced me, his arms now held loosely at his sides. “Any kind of different fiction would be an improvement.” “We have Iliad and Odyssey.” “Rafe said that wasn’t fiction.” “It’s not?” “Ahem, not that listening to you two discuss literature isn’t utterly fascinating, but we do have some things to discuss that you might find of interest,” Lilith interjected. Gavin faced the three again and crossed his arms. “Such as?” Lilith smiled a used car salesman’s smile. “A friendly warning.” “We’re not friends.” Gavin’s tone held no warmth. Lilith no longer smiled. “Just a figure of speech.” “So is ‘suck my dick’. Ever hear that one?” I put in my two cents worth. Gavin snorted. “You really can be surprisingly crude.” “I think they got the picture.” “Have you considered that your children will go on without you, Charity; that you’ll

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never be a mother to them again or even know your own grandchildren?” “Yes.” I kept on surprising them I guessed by their raised eyebrows. “Doesn’t it bother you?” “Yes, but they have the best mother they could have–me. I’m still with them. Or did you forget that? Unlike other people, I get to fulfill my destiny personally as a mother and contribute to society as a Dancer.” I felt Gavin relax and realized how worried he’d been for me. I do wish everyone would give me more credit for thinking things out. I spend enough time alone to come up with some pretty good ideas and insights. Asmodai and Belial moved to stand in line with Lilith. This time Asmodai spoke. “And what makes you so sure you’re up to the responsibility of a Dancer?” Belial piped up before I could answer. “Wouldn’t it be better to leave it up to a more experienced and skilled Dancer?” Oh, yeah, they were good. They knew my weakness–self-doubt. I guess they either didn’t know or ignored how stubborn I was, though. “It might be better to leave it up to someone better and more experienced,” I felt Gavin stiffen next to me, “but I was the one who was asked, the one chosen. So, until I’m told differently or until I’m dead, all my effort and all my faith will go into finishing this.” I turned to Gavin, who smiled proudly at me. “Are we about done for today? I’m famished, and Mary promised me pork chops tonight.” Gavin’s smile widened. “Sounds like a plan.” He looked again at the three demons, his smile gone. “It seems like we found something better to do.” Lilith laughed. “Do you really believe it will be that easy? We will leave you with one other thought.” I cringed. I hoped not visibly. Gavin had no reaction. Lilith smiled that horrid ‘gotcha’ smile, and turned to address Gavin. “How do you know you won’t fail Charity the way you failed your family? Will Charity die in your place this time like Ian did before?” And then they were gone. “Well, that was just plain mean. They’re off the guest list for our victory celebration.” Gavin hadn’t stirred. His face had lost all color and his eyes held a bleak, hopeless look. They were not going to do this to my Gavin! I grabbed his upper arms and looked into his face. I could tell he didn’t see me, so I shook him. “Look at me, Gavin. Ian didn’t die because of you. He died because someone decided a ten-year-old boy with his father’s sword posed a threat, was in the way, or just out of plain cussedness killed him. You were not even able to leave your bed. None of it was your fault or even under your control. You can’t let them do this to you!” He turned those pain-filled eyes toward me and I cursed the beings that had hurt him. “What if I do fail you?” “Listen, the only way you can fail me is to listen to their bullshit.” “But what if I do fail, or we fail?” “Then we fail. We can only do what we can do. But if you think I’m giving up before

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then, you’re crazy and you don’t know me very well. Besides, Raphael told me that whatever happens was always meant to happen anyway.” Gavin smiled finally and stroked my check. “So much passion. I’d forgotten how to feel that much until you.” I turned my face into his palm. “That’s what I’m for, to teach you what you’ve forgotten.” “And what am I for?” “You teach me what I never knew. And we teach each other how to trust again.”

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Chapter Nine I modeled for Gavin in the afternoons. He made me strip, so I made him strip. Fair is fair, after all. Ever the perfectionist, it took several minutes to arrange my pose and position me just so. He had a thing for shadows and angles, but even he couldn’t arrange the sun’s position, so he settled for repositioning me every so often instead. At first, the fact that I sat fully exposed in front of a wall full of picture windows caused me some discomfort. After all, besides the two other males in the household, Dancers were prone to stop by unannounced. But after a few sessions, I lost myself in listening to Gavin’s stories about times and events I had only experienced in books and movies. Besides, Gavin didn’t even seem to care that he worked naked. His state of dress or undress didn’t affect his painting or sculpting either. He placed his easel or stand in such a way that I could watch his progress. He warned me, though, that it I tried ‘helping’ with little suggestions, I’d soon be watching the back of the stand or easel, and he’d be hidden behind it. I kept my mouth shut. I suppose I could have refused to pose, but that seemed more like cutting off my nose to spite my face than teaching Gavin a lesson. The more I learned about him, the more curious I became about the women he’d known. After all, it takes a lot of practice and attention to detail to become as proficient and adept as Gavin was in certain intimate activities. It was difficult to know how to ask, but not knowing drove me nuts. As much as I wanted to know all about him and his past, I found myself jealous of women many centuries dead before I’d even been born. Sometimes, ignorance really is bliss. “Gavin, what were the women like?” He kept working and didn’t look up. “What women?” “You know, the women that lived in your time.” Real smooth, Charity. Now he looked up. “The women of my time or the women I made time with?” He chuckled at his own cleverness. Well, I know I looked embarrassed, because it was definitely what I felt. I couldn’t meet his eyes. Then I chickened out altogether. “Oh, the women of your time. When you were born.” He laughed, but answered, “I’m sure that’s just what you meant.” I looked down and remained silent. “You would have fit in perfectly in my clan.” Curious now, I raised my eyes and asked, “I would have?” He started painting, frowning; at his memories or something in the painting itself, I didn’t know. “Sure. Celtic women were strong, equal partners. Some, not many, but some were even warriors. But that was all before Christianity spread.” “What happened then?”

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“It happened after my time, but I watched. Priests took away our gods and our culture and substituted subservience to the Church. It was centuries before Celtic women or any other women gained back a modicum of the rights and privileges they enjoyed during my lifetime.” Gavin sounded bitter. “Are you a pagan then?” He stopped and looked surprised, then burst into laughter. “I don’t confuse the church with those who misuse their positions in the church; whatever their real reasons for doing so are. Besides, after doing this work and living with Rafe all these centuries, it would be difficult to be a pagan. No, I’m a monotheist.” “Fancy word.” “Mmm. Just means I believe in a higher intelligence and a plan that controls it all. The only question I have is why.” “Why?” “You know…why us? Why good and evil? Why bother, we don’t seem to be worth it.” “Cynical much?” He sighed heavily. “I suppose I am.” He lifted his brush, then stopped to smile at me, his grin wide and charming claiming all his face. “Perhaps you can reform me.” I chuckled, amused at his light play. “I know a lost cause when I see one.” “You wound me.” He turned his attention back to his painting. “How exactly did you become a Dancer?” He smiled. “Unlike for you, my choice was fairly easy to make. After all, there’s not much inducement to staying on an island where you’ve been a slave for more than a third of your life and where you are currently waiting for an active volcano to explode. I actually did hesitate, though. “I’d already lived longer than the average man. My leg had never healed right and produced constant pain. My family was dead or gone. I really saw no reason to extend my life a couple more decades let alone centuries.” “What changed your mind?” I couldn’t imagine Gavin being anything but placid and unflappable. He stopped and lifted his brush, fixing me with an intense stare that I felt to my toes. I couldn’t look away, even though it was uncomfortable to maintain his searing gaze. “You did.” “How did I affect your decision? I wasn’t even born yet.” His smile turned tender. “Do you remember in the cabin when I told you that the first time I made the decision to wait for you was the night Vesuvius erupted?” “Vaguely. I remember other things that happened that night at the cabin even better, though.” I’d connected with other people before–my husband and children, Cammy—but I’d never before connected with someone on this level, nor felt it physically. My stomach clenched, the pull tugging at my core. Even though I was uncomfortable, I couldn’t look away. Then just like that, he smiled and looked away, his smile saying he knew how he’d affected me. I suspected that he felt it too, though.

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He physically shook off his mood and frowned in concentration, no longer seeing me or anything else this side of the present. When he spoke, his tone, low and modulated, set the melancholy mood for his story. “The entire week before the explosion had been…unsettling. Animals were frantic, probably sensing something was wrong. Later in the week, the earth beneath the city moved and groaned like a woman in labor. Streams dried up, steam escaped holes in the side of the mountain, yet everyone still thought the volcano posed no danger. “Throughout the day and into the night, ash and gases rolled over the city, coating everything and making it difficult to breathe. By late afternoon, the ash and smoke effectively blocked out the sun. Many started to succumb to poisonous gases and airborne debris, dying before the lava even flowed. I had decided to remain behind, more weary than I’d ever been before or since.” He smiled, pausing a moment in his story. “Hope doesn’t always spring eternal.” I nodded, agreeing sadly. “No, I suppose it doesn’t. Is this the part where you met Raphael?” “Yes. I’d already sent everyone else away. I sat in my master’s chair, drinking my master’s best wine, staring into my master’s courtyard and wondering if I’d be conscious when the lava arrived and feel pain or if I’d already be dead from the noxious fumes. Raphael appeared out of thin air. You know how it looks. He stepped through an invisible doorway opening in the middle of nowhere.” I smiled recalling the first time I’d seen Gavin’s tricks. “Did you freak out as much as I did?” He laughed. “No, and I didn’t stomp on his foot either.” Disgruntled, I mumbled something about not liking strangers touching me, even if the stranger was the finest eye candy I’d ever seen. Then I scowled harder when he just laughed at my rantings. “Okay, Mr. Smarty Pants, why didn’t you freak out?” “I don’t really know. I guess that in the mood I was in, he seemed to belong there. I think I did ask him if I was dying. He said he hoped it wouldn’t come to that.” “So, he’s always been a smart ass?” He snorted. “He told me that he’d been sent to guide me, to take me away to become a Time Dancer, to do important work. You know the spiel.” I chuckled. “Was it as effective on you as it was on me?” “Well, I may have made some disparaging remarks about his sanity, but I did agree to let him show me some things. He promised I wouldn’t regret it and I never did.” “What did he show you?” “You. He showed me you. That was all it took.” “What exactly did he show you?” I couldn’t imagine anything in my life convincing anyone of anything except maybe as a cautionary tale–’The Dangers of Wasting Years Trying to Meet Other Peoples’ Expectations Because You Didn’t have Any of Your Own’. His gaze focused on the distant past, he answered, “I saw a little girl, eight or nine years old, eager to please. She watched everyone and everything. And when no one was watching her, curiosity drove her to find the why of everything. It was the reason she watched in the

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first place.” I laughed. “I do remember my parents complaining that I was always underfoot. They constantly told me to stop asking so many questions and go out to play with the other kids.” He grew more agitated as he continued. “Then came age twelve and the disillusionment of your parents’ divorce. You were so lonely that I wanted to reach out and comfort you, but I couldn’t of course. “I watched you grow and mature into an attractive young woman. You didn’t have to settle for mediocrity, you know.” I looked away. Though I could tell he wasn’t criticizing, I grew uncomfortable with all the attention focused on my life. Besides, I’d done the best I could with what I’d had and what I had known at the time. I looked at him and raised my chin, spoiling for a fight. “My son and daughter were more than worth it,” I remarked defensively. He nodded. “Undoubtedly. It’s just too bad you thought you had to trade your life for theirs.” I laughed at the erroneous conclusion he’d made. “I didn’t trade. I was just afraid and I used them to hide behind.” He raised his eyebrows in surprise. “You afraid? You’re not afraid of anything.” He was sweet, but boy, was he mistaken. “I feared being alone, afraid I wouldn’t make it, or even worse, afraid I might. Then I’d have to admit I’d wasted so much of my life.” “Nothing is wasted. What we experience makes us who we are.” “I know that…now. I knew it then, here,” I pointed to my head, “but I didn’t know that deep inside where convictions are buried.” I shifted uncomfortably. Hoping to redirect the conversation, I said, “Besides, this was supposed to be you telling me about you. What was it like where and when you grew up?” “Hmm. It was damned hard work. People were pretty much the same, though. They just didn’t live as long. There were more ways to die than there were ways to stay alive. “You knew what was expected and what your life would be like by how your parents, family, and clan lived. There was little tolerance for anyone different and fear and suspicion for anyone behaving out of the norm.” He grew still and even more thoughtful. “I grew up among hunters and warriors, where everyday life could be even more brutal than normal. Battles, though, never killed as prolifically as the infected battle wounds did later.” He shrugged. “I wasn’t much suited to the life of a warrior, but I was good at it. From my first battle at thirteen until I was so severely injured, I’d never lost a fight. I didn’t really lose that battle either since the three I fought ended up dead, and I didn’t.” He rubbed the phantom of his old wound. “Adrenaline masks pain and keeps you going long past the point of self-preservation. In my case, I remained conscious and alert until blood loss finally brought me down. I woke a couple days later in my own bed, delirious and with a high fever.” He sighed and closed his eyes as though to chase away the ghosts of pain. “My best friend, Rory, had pulled me from the battle field and carried me home. Until I met Raphael, I often wished Rory hadn’t bothered. In any case, he died in the Roman attack

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on our village. He was only there because he wanted to stay to see to me. So, in a way, I was responsible for his death, too.” He paused and stared over my shoulder at something only he could see. What do you say to something like that? I’m sorry? I searched for something, anything to take his mind off the sadness of his memories. “What about the women? You said you weren’t a father again. From age twenty-five to forty is a long time.” His voice held no warmth and was detached, as though he recited someone else’s story. “I was taken into slavery at an age where I never forgot being free. No child of mine would ever be born into slavery. Even then, there were ways to prevent pregnancy. After I became a Dancer, the problem no longer existed.” Perversely, I grew indignant on behalf of the women. “Did none of them mean anything to you?” He frowned, obviously as confused by my question as I was. “I never forced anyone or promised anything. Hell, I rarely even slept with anyone more than once.” “Ever pay for it?” Meow. Where had that come from? I was immediately contrite, but you can’t pull back spoken words. I saw him flinch, but he answered me calmly, “No, I never had to pay for it. And I never told anyone I loved them until you.” “What about your wife?” “What about her?” “Surely you told her you loved her.” “No, and she wouldn’t have believed me if I had. She was Rory’s sister, and our families had known each other since before we were even born. Our marriage was arranged long before we actually took our vows. We did respect each other and produced two fine boys. I’m sure we would have had more children had things been different. Perhaps we would even have fallen in love, given time.” Skeptical, I pushed it. “Gavin, two thousand years is a very long time.” His smile mocking, he answered, “I believe I know that far better than you, Charity.” I felt the heat rise off my face as I blushed, partly embarrassed, but still very dubious. "Gavin, no one?” He crossed his arms and fixed me with that intense stare. Perhaps he couldn’t decide if it would be such a bad idea to throttle me right then and be done with the torment. “No one. However, I did get to watch you, my soul mate, live with another man for twenty years, sleep in his bed, and bear his children. And then, when you were finally free of him, I had to wait another couple years for you to be ready.” “Oh.” I felt small, and I suppose I had been petty, but this was way too much for me to comprehend. I didn’t deserve that kind of love. I didn’t know what to do with it. “Gavin, I’m sorry. For everything.” I rose and picked up my robe. Slipping into it, I tied the belt and walked to him. I forgot most of the time how really old Gavin was. Then there were times like these that

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brought it back to me in glaring Technicolor. I’ll never be able to understand that kind of patient abiding. How does that not drive someone crazy? He stared over my head out the windows. I could tell that he was angry, but also that I’d hurt him. Every rigid muscle in his posture told me so. I laid my hand on his still crossed arms. He flinched, but didn’t pull away. “Listen, Gavin, I open my mouth without thinking, but I didn’t mean to hurt you or say those things. It’s kind of a defense mechanism.” He turned his head toward me, his eyes full of sadness. I didn’t like to see it there any more than I liked seeing the hurt. “Your defense mechanism excuse won’t last forever. Yes, you were treated unfairly, but so are most of us in one way or another. You wrap the hurt around you like a security blanket against the world. You can’t let it keep ruling your life. If you don’t let go of it and let someone else get close, you’ll never be able to trust again.” My first reaction defensive, I withdrew my hand and took a step back. I wanted to argue that I had a right to my anger, that I had been terribly wronged and deserved retribution or at least I had a right to protect myself from getting hurt again. Why should I trust anyone? Gavin turned back to his easel and sighed. He gathered his brushes and placed them in the turpentine he had ready. He wiped his hands on a rag, rose and nonchalantly walked over to where he’d draped his jeans over a chair back. I admired the long line of him, the cool elegance of his movement, his pure masculine beauty. I watched the unself-conscious way he stepped into his pants and pulled them up, leaving them unbuttoned. Without a word, he pulled all the drapes closed. The silence screamed at me. The longer we remained unspeaking, the more worried I became. I desperately sought for something to say. I knew that I feared how much I needed him or at least how obsessed I had become with him. I felt the ties binding us closer every minute of every day like solder cooling and hardening in what remained of the gap still keeping us separate people. But mostly, I feared what losing him would do to me. I shouldn’t feel so much for someone I’d known such a short time. He turned and walked toward me, beams from the skylight playing over him as he walked across the circle of light. He stopped next to the sofa to my right and leaned back against it, half-sitting. “What now, Charity?” “Now?” The single word question caught in my throat and rasped past my lips. He rested his hands on either side of his hips along the back of the sofa. My eyes fastened on them as they flexed against the ornate fabric, whitening his knuckles and betraying the agitation not apparent in his even tone. “Did you really expect that I would be some celibate monk for a couple thousand years, my life in stasis until you were ready? Would you even want someone like that? “I’ve known women, none of them like I know you. Every person we get to know, to share parts of ourselves with, no matter how small, takes and gives pieces molding us into the people we become. Yet we can only afford to give ourselves completely to a limited number of people.

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“So what is it you really want to know? What can I possibly tell you that would make you trust me? I’m not Ed.” I approached close enough to lay my palms against his chest. His muscles twitched in reaction, but his expression remained impassive. “You’re right.” His forever eyes darkened, the only indication that he wasn’t immune to my touch. "What am I right about?” I smiled. I knew this dance, my favorite and the only one I wanted to do with Gavin right now. I saw the flash of heat cross his face moments before he suppressed it. I splayed my hands across his torso, and then lifted one to play with the curls along the back of his neck and one to rest possessively at the top of his open jeans on his hip as I moved closer to him. “What I don’t want to know is what you did to whom and when you did it as long as you do me and only me from now on.” And I meant it at that moment. I only wondered how long it would take me to stop pulling on my hair shirt every once in awhile, possibly fucking up the best thing I’d ever had. His hopeful–but dubious–expression didn’t put my mind at ease at all, and neither did his rigid posture. “And what exactly do you want me to do to you?” I smiled, playing it out. “Everything.” His eyebrows rose in surprise and I laughed at the expression on his face. Sex play wasn’t like the reserved, modest woman I usually was. Punctuating each word with kisses along his jaw, I answered him, “Everything…and…anything.” Thanks to Gavin, I was outgrowing the staid, uptight person I’d been most of my life. He watched me closely, his smoldering expression darkening the blue of his eyes to indigo. “Anything, huh? Anything covers quite a lot of territory.” The blaze in his eyes, the tilt of his lips when he smiled, the melody captured in the low tone of his voice, the smell and taste and thought of him and I knew that I was on my way over the falls in a barrel again, naked as the day I was born. He searched my face finding something in my eyes that satisfied him because he smiled and finally touched me. Untying my robe, he allowed it to drape open. He held onto it, opening it slightly to inspect my body thoroughly like a prospective buyer. I felt his scrutiny like a caress across my skin. While I still maintained a small portion of my thinking ability, I reminded Gavin that we weren’t alone in the house. “You know we’re not guaranteed privacy, right?” We’d been interrupted more than once. I suspected Raphael came himself because he enjoyed watching me scurry around trying to get into to my robe as quickly as I could. Gavin ignored whoever came in, male or female. Whatever else he’d been previously, he hadn’t been a prude. “Gavin, did you hear me?” Because he half reclined on the couch back, his head was a lot closer to my level now. I watched his grin widen into a wicked leer. “Charity, have I ever told you that you talk too much?”

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I scowled and opened my mouth for a clever retort. Well, I’m sure it would have been a clever retort, but Gavin distracted me with his talented hands removing my robe and tossing it aside. And then I found something much better to do with my mouth My arms draped around his neck of their own accord as I moved closer to taste him. Like honey on a lazy summer’s afternoon, his skin was warm and sweet. His pulse jumped under my mouth as I suckled and marked him. I figured that his unintelligible growl was the only answer I was likely to get from him. I relaxed and forgot that there was anyone or anything outside of us in existence. Only Gavin could make me forget myself so completely. I couldn’t help but wonder if he felt it, too. But too afraid that he retained the control I couldn’t, I didn’t ask him. Something was different. I felt it in his touch and in the kisses he branded against my skin. I became feverishly desperate to touch more of him, afraid that this happiness would slip away, gone before I could savor the joy. He framed my face in his hands and forced me to look at him. “Charity, slow down. I’m not going anywhere. What’s the hurry?” He frowned and gifted me with his special smile. “I plan on taking my time and even your impetuosity won’t deter me.” When you look into someone’s eyes, really look deep, past the shields and shallow surface, you see pieces of their true selves, their soul. But this isn’t what makes it uncomfortable. No, gazing deeply naturally opens you up and they can see into you, all the way to your soul. Being so exposed and vulnerable takes more trust than people generally afford each other. Though I’d been married to Ed for more than two decades, I don’t recall ever having opened myself to him like that. What did that say about our marriage? With Gavin, I had no choice. I couldn’t look away and I couldn’t help looking past the outside while he stripped away my own protective shell. He still held my face between his hands. I caressed his cheek in my palm, stepping closer to his warmth. His eyes still locked with mine, he stroked my arms and cupped my breasts in his hands. Frissons of pleasure skittered down my spine, raising the hairs at the back of my neck when he gently rolled my nipples between his fingers. He lowered his head and covered my lips with his, exploring my mouth with his tongue. I felt the release of answering warmth and moisture between my legs and moaned, wrapping my arms around his neck, pressing my body even closer. His hand moved to cradle the back of my head and his other arms slid firmly around my waist. The stiff denim of his jeans pressed into my stomach reminding me that he still remained partially dressed. He pulled away again. One fist wrapped tightly in my hair, he grinned at me and stood fully to switch our positions. Releasing my hair, he lifted me onto the back of the plush sofa. Putting a hand on each of my knees, he moved my legs apart and knelt between them, draping my legs over his shoulders. His hands shifted to my hips, to pull me closer to the edge of the couch. He kept his eyes locked with mine as he gently spread the folds of my labia, opening me to the stroke of his fingers. I dropped my head back and closed my eyes when Gavin’s tongue caressed the length of my crevice, the velvet touch drawing a moan of tortured pleasure from me. It was not enough and yet too much.

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He entered me, first with one and then two fingers, starting a rhythm mimicking the possession to come. His tongue echoed the cadence and swirled around, nearly touching, but never fully rubbing over my nub, erect in anticipation. My muscles clenched and sweat broke over me until I thought I might expire if Gavin didn’t stop teasing me. “For goddsake, Gavin, you’re killing me.” I felt him chuckle, the humming vibrations nearly finishing the job. I groaned loudly and he took my pleading flesh into his mouth and suckled, bringing me over fast and hard. He stood and I felt a cool breeze between my thighs when he backed up a step to remove his jeans. I opened my eyes again, possessively eyeing Gavin’s body–all mine. Pulling me up, he wrapped me in his arms and lowered his head to kiss me, my scent and taste still on his lips. His mouth moved over my face to my throat, where he nipped my skin, gently stimulating my senses. The yearning swelled from deep within, that feeling Gavin always drew from me whether or not I willed it. But I willed it in spades right then. He lifted my hair off my neck and kissed a path to my nape, turning me and wrapping his arms around me from behind, his erection hot and heavy against my back. His hands moved over me, pulling me even more firmly back against him. Controlled, but not controlling, his hands moved over me conveying need, yearning, love. His hands moved over me, a gift, a piece of Heaven I’d never known before and never wanted to lose. I fit him. He fit me. Synergy–more than the sum of our wholes. As Raphael was fond of saying, “the definitive summit in the minuscule window of time in which perfection exists never to be born in the same incarnation again”–ultimate perfection. It was almost too much, too good, too perfect. Moments do not, cannot last for more than a small slice of time, making them even more precious by their rarity. Most of us live our lives never experiencing these rare moments in time, never finding the person who completes us, the one person we complete. Without Gavin, I never would have, either. Too flowery? Probably. Too sentimental? More than likely. Too good to last? As I would discover, most definitely. He moved between my legs, spreading them even further apart. Pulling me up taut against him with one hand, he used the other to trail fingers over my abdomen, riding over my mons, dipping into the prodigious cream now flowing at his touch. “I wish I had more hands to touch all of you at once.” His breath, warm and moist against my neck, his evocative words, his scent, his skin slick with sweat all combined to seduce my senses. I longed to climb into his skin and merge with him until we were one. He held and supported me, bending me over the couch, against the plump cushions. Wrapping his upper body around me, he slid into me, finally joining us. He held still a moment, gaining control, and then moved in slow, firm strokes. Sweat gathered drying in sticky patches across my face, down my legs and arms. Gavin clutched me around the middle, his rhythm growing faster and stronger. He tensed and I knew he was close to the edge. I tightened my inner muscles and he faltered and groaned. I felt the wave rising, so I relaxed and let it come. Gavin held me closer and reached his own climax; the warm pulses driving me over the

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edge to join him. He sank against me. For several minutes, we rested over the back of the sofa, breathing heavily. He withdrew from me and chuckled when he stumbled trying to straighten and take a step. He waited another minute before reaching for his jeans and pulling them on. I turned around and lean against the cushions. I watched him approach, his expression softening in love, his whole demeanor welcoming. He held me tenderly and I felt loved. I remembered, though, that nothing lasts forever, especially happiness. As Gavin held me, I trembled, an awful foreboding seizing every bit of joy in the moment. “Are you cold?” “Just a little.” I had no desire to subject him to my paranoid pessimism. He sighed and smiled down at me. “I suppose you’ll want to dress now?” I laughed. “Let’s not frighten the staff by parading through the house naked. Raphael would be perturbed if we caused them any distress.” He picked up my robe and wrapped it around me, holding onto the edges and pulling me closer to him. He kissed me tenderly and tucked me under his chin. Holding me closely, he said, “I guess I’ll just have to keep your delectable body to myself.” I wished that he could, but I had a feeling that I was only waiting for the other shoe to drop.

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Chapter Ten We weren’t the only Dancers Raphael handled, just the only two to live with him because of how close ‘the time’ was. He left often to handle other Dancers, but I never knew how he spent his free time. Gavin had gone to his lair to work on a landscape and I’d just finished reading Moby Dick cover to cover. It taught me that I never would again read a book for the sake of saying I’d read it or because it was a ‘classic’. It had to have more to offer than that. I walked into the front room and found Raphael sitting in his usual chair, his fingers steepled in their normal position. It occurred to me how little I knew about this man who held so much power in my life. I decided to ask him a few questions while I had the chance. “Come on, Charity. Sit. Grilling me will be so much more comfortable that way.” Maybe I should have been more surprised than I was that he knew what I was after, but I’d come to expect things like that from him. Whatever else he was, Raphael was no mere mortal, not even a mere Dancer. “Do you know everything?” He snorted. “If I knew everything, the last thing I would have done this morning is let you catch me alone. But I suppose you’d just stalk me like the little curiosity hound you are.” I sat and studied him. How to begin? I wiggled uncomfortably, and then looked down at my interlaced hands for inspiration. Who he is? What he is? “Well?” Raphael’s question startled me, but I still didn’t know where to start. He relaxed back in his chair and laid his arms along the armrests, turning his head toward me. His eyes filled with suppressed mirth. “Let me guess. You want to know who I am and where I come from.” I nodded. “Well, I wish I could tell you.” He turned his gaze forward. “No, actually I’m rather glad I can’t. It would just lead to a theological/philosophical debate and then, knowing you, endless questions leading to more debates and questions.” He turned toward me again and smiled. “Yes, I’m really very glad that I can’t tell you.” “Why can’t you tell me? It’s not like I have anyone to tell or, for that matter, anyone who’d believe me.” “No, but it would interfere with free will, yours and others. You’d have more information than you need to make choices based on faith and conviction.” “Why is that important?” He sighed. “I should have known there’d be know stopping the endless questions.” I smiled. “Answers would stop them.” He laughed. “I’m happy to see your sense of humor has improved. You wasted way too many years in depression over imagined sins that never did exist anywhere but in your own mind.” “How do you know that?” “Like I keep telling you, it’s my job to know these things.”

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His all-knowing smile left me feeling stripped. I looked down at my hands, unable to meet his piercing gaze. “That can’t be all, Charity.” “Has Gavin always been so patient?” He frowned. “I would have thought you considered him extremely impatient.” I knew I was blushing, but I ignored my discomfort and continued. “No, I mean when it comes to waiting for me?” “He was never patient about waiting for you, just resigned.” This was getting difficult. “Well, didn’t he have, you know, impulses?” He smiled, amused at my discomfort. “Impulses?” I sighed. “Sex, Raphael, sex. Didn’t he get a little impatient for sex?” He laughed. “Have you asked him?” “Yes. But he treats it so casually. He didn’t form any relationships or anything?” He cocked his head to one side and watched me, his lips still twitching in amusement. "No, he never really formed any ties with his, ah, partners. Unlike people less long-lived, he wasn’t bothered by those pesky emotions anymore. Well, that is except when it came to you. In another situation, he would have been considered a stalker. Luckily, he stayed out of trouble and off the radar so you were never the wiser.” He paused and smiled. “Does his lack of previous commitments bother you? That’s a little backward you know.” I laughed with him. “No, it’s just a little hard to fathom anyone remaining that disconnected for that long. What about you, Rafe?” “What about me?” “Are you never bothered by those pesky emotions?” He chuckled. “Oh, I’m bothered by emotions alright, even pesky ones. They just don’t happen to be the aberrant, hormonal kind.” Aberrant, hormonal emotions? Well, that was succinct and, I had to admit, not a bad description of the battle of the sexes. It was a horrible way to think of love, though. “You’ve never been in love? Never had a family or children?” “No.” “So, have you ever even had, um, you know?” He watched me squirm, amusement setting the corners of his mouth twitching again and his eyes twinkling. If Gavin had forever eyes, Raphael had fathomless. It took a lot to move him to show anything from them but calm tranquility. I seemed to have been lucky that way. Everyone got off on laughing at my embarrassment. “You know, Charity, Gavin’s right. You really ought to be able to say the words if you’re so willing to perform the acts or question someone else’s behavior.” “The acts?” Discomfiture fled in the wake of my growing anger. “You and Gavin discuss my, I mean mine and Gavin’s sex life?” I grew shrill, but I couldn’t help it. Some things should remain private, right?

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“See? ‘Sex life’, now that wasn’t so hard, was it?” Raphael’s amusement seemed to grow in direct proportion to my annoyance. I clenched my teeth together until my jaw ached trying to control my runaway temper. I wasn’t sure if I was angrier with Raphael for laughing at my discomfort or Gavin for being indiscreet. “No, I suppose my Puritanical roots are showing.” He snorted. “Trust me, you’re no Puritan.” “Should I be insulted?” He smiled. “No. Most Puritans wasted their precious lives in servitude to maintaining appearances. Afraid to enjoy life, they satisfied their sense of decorum by never sharing themselves with anyone, ever–not laughter, not pain, not joy. They gave themselves up as living sacrifices to the God of Moderation they’d fashioned to rule over their lives.” I had calmed down now, a little taken aback by Raphael’s words, both the tone and amount. He wasn’t usually so loquacious or obvious about his feelings, especially disgust. Lost in his own thoughts, he seemed to forget I was there. I would have left it alone…but then I wouldn’t have been me. I wanted him to be not so serious. I wanted to make him laugh, even at my own expense. He needed it. Besides, I was still curious about his sex life. Curiosity may have killed the cat and I figured that one day it would lead to my downfall as well. “Soooo, Rafe, ever done it?” He turned his attention to me and raised his eyebrows, asking silently if I still wanted to go there. Then again, maybe he was asking if I was stupid or just plain crazy. My lips formed a perfect smirk letting him know that I was indeed crazy and dared to go just about anywhere. “You ever done the wild thing, or played hide the salami, or screwed, or fucked? You ever had sex…with another person I mean?” He gaped at me a full three seconds, and then burst into laughter. The sound was musical, entirely captivating. I smiled and chuckled with him, realizing I’d actually managed to shock and surprise him. I doubt that happened often. Still smiling, he slumped back into his chair. “Oh, Charity, I guess I ought to be careful what I ask for, especially around you.” “I know other equally clever euphemisms, if you’d like to hear them,” I offered. “No, I think we’ll save them for another time.” I waited a few moments. “Well, have you?” Still smiling, he replied, “You’re like a terrier puppy with a new chew toy.” He steepled his fingers and watched me closely. “Let’s just say that I promise not to tease you about your love life and you won’t question me about mine.” I grunted. “Will it make any difference if I agree or not?” “Sure it will. If you agree, I won’t tease you about your love life. Either way, you know about all you’re going to know about mine.” “Hmm, sounds like a deal, at least for now.” It also sounded as though he might actually have something to hide. He took my proffered hand to shake on the deal and held onto it for a little longer. “Did I tell you how glad I am that you’re here?”

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Surprise must have shown on my face. “No, I don’t think you ever have.” He laughed and released my hand. “Well, then I’ll have to remember to do that.” I rolled my eyes and leaned forward to leave when another question occurred to me. Raphael sighed. “Yes, Charity?” I looked back up at him, not even asking how he knew I had another question. "How old are you?” I really didn’t expect an answer, but I got one anyway…sort of. “I’m a great deal older than Gavin. I will tell you this, though, that before the end of all this, you’ll know everything you need to know.” “Raphael, do you know how this will all end?” “Of course I do. It will end the way it was always meant to end. Now run along and bother someone else for awhile.” “That is soooo patronizing.” I did get up to leave, though. “Isn’t it though.” Raphael had closed his eyes, his mind already turning to something or someone else. Dismissed, I left the room and returned to my next reading project, War and Peace. I wondered if I’d have time to finish it. ***** I know I didn’t want to get up the first time I opened my eyes the next morning, and it didn’t get any better later. By noon, it had reached ninety degrees and rising, and wouldn’t cool down until long after sundown. Ah…springtime in Phoenix. Sweat gathered in all my bodily creases and dripped into my eyes, stinging like a sonofabitch, which only made things worse. Long before afternoon the bitch factor had settled firmly on my shoulders, so I decided, that discretion being the better part of valor, I’d keep my mouth firmly shut. Too bad Gavin, the Training Nazi, obviously saw no value in being valiant. After about the tenth time he said, “Dammit, Charity, concentrate,” I decided that taking myself to a cooler more favorable climate was definitely the thing to do. So, I Stepped Out and into Sunrise Ski resort, landing in about the same place I had when visiting Carrie. I hiked again to her favorite spot, knowing she wouldn’t be there. The cool breeze lifted the scent of wild flowers and pine, laying it gently all around me and drying the sweat into tacky patches on my forehead and neck. I sat contented just to watch the clouds drift overhead for a bit. Gavin arrived about a half hour later emanating enough fury to heat my back. “Are you trying to drive me crazy, Charity?” I stared straight ahead not even turning around to answer him. “No, I seem to be able to do it without much thought.” I leaned back resting my weight on my elbows and closed my eyes. I felt Gavin move closer, but ignored him. “Charity,” I had no idea what his next words would have been, something pithy and offensive I’m sure, but a clap of thunder from a bolt of lightening striking only a few feet in

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front of us interrupted. My eyes snapped open and I jumped up. The smell of sulfur and ozone wafted over us emanating from the haze surrounding the area where the lightening had struck. A stranger appeared from the midst of the smoke like some stage magician. His hair, dark as a raven’s wing, lay slicked back and to his head and matched his goatee. He had birdlike eyes the color of obsidian that honed in on me making me very glad Gavin had shown up. I tried hard not to hide behind him. Dressed all in black, the stranger really did look like he was on his way to ‘astound and confound us with amazing feats of prestidigitation’. I moved closer to Gavin as he approached. Gavin had crossed his arms, his face devoid of expression, which let me know he was anything but happy. Shadows grew deeper all around us, although the sky remained cloudless. “Gavin.” “Luc.” “What’s it been? Two or three decades?” “Give or take.” “And this must be Charity.” Gavin moved in front of me, cutting off Luc’s access. “Must it?” They eyed each other silently a few more minutes. “What do you want, Luc?” “Can’t I just want to meet the latest Dancer?” “No.” Luc laughed. “You can’t be with her all the time you know.” “Yes, I can.” Gavin’s flat tone carried a message I wasn’t getting. Luc’s eyebrows raised and he laughed again, but this time the sound grated across every nerve I had. “Perhaps you can.” He looked me over indolently. “I can see why you’d want to.” I moved even closer to Gavin and felt him stiffen. I grabbed his arm, afraid he might do something foolish. I had no idea what exactly, but I knew in my gut that I couldn’t let him attack this Luc guy. The menace surrounding him was enough to alarm me. “Charity, Gavin, I thought I might find you here.” Raphael had appeared behind Luc, but ignored him and approached us as though Luc didn’t exist. Once past him, Raphael turned and faced Luc, placing himself between him and us. “You aren’t trying to intimidate my Dancers are you, Luc?” “Gavin doesn’t look the least little bit intimidated,” Luc noted. Raphael crossed his arms, his feet planted wide. “It’s not time yet. You know the rules, Luc. Don’t think they won’t be enforced.” Luc snorted. “Speaking of rules, the balance still has to be kept, Rafe.” “And your point?” “There’s one too many.” Luc’s words fell like stones. I wanted to ask one too many what, but I didn’t figure I’d like the answer. There are times when even I manage to keep my mouth shut.

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When Raphael remained silent, Luc turned to leave then stopped and turned back, an oily smile firmly in place. “It won’t make any difference, you know. Time is about up. Still, there is one too many. I can’t let that go, but I suppose one’s as good as another. Right?” He inclined his head toward me. “Charity.” He turned back around and walked into the smoke, disappearing in another clap of thunder and a lightening strike. The afternoon cleared again as though the Earth could breathe easier now. Raphael nodded at us and disappeared without a word. Gavin remained motionless, watching the spot where Raphael had stood. The whole thing weirded me out. “So, Gavin, friend of yours?” He turned toward me and frowned as though just remembering that I was there. "Huh?" “That Luc guy. Friend of yours?” “Hardly.” He grabbed my wrist gently and pulled me into his arms. I rested my cheek against his chest and snuggled closer. “That, my dear, was the Prince of Darkness himself, Lucifer, Evil Incarnate and the reason you’re not going to be leaving my sight for the duration.”

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Chapter Eleven Meeting Lucifer hadn’t scared me; it had terrified me. Suddenly everything hit home and the stakes made clearer. This was a head game, but not chess or something equally innocuous. We played for real heads, real lives, real futures. I got that now. I know my silence for the remainder of the afternoon and during dinner concerned Gavin. I could see it in his face. I chewed on the happenings of that day, masticated them into paste, and swallowed the whole glop down to be done with it. “Gavin?” I interrupted his story to Raphael. “Yes?” “Can we get money and IDs?” Gavin looked at Raphael, who shrugged. I’d have to decipher their shorthand code someday, but I figured it might take me years. Gavin looked warily at me. “If we need them. Why?” I rose from the table. “Because I want to go dancing.” “Dancing? As in music kind of dancing?” Gavin rose also. I had already picked up my plate and moved toward the kitchen. “Sure, the music kind of dancing. It’s not like you can use the normal male excuse that you can’t dance, can you?” Gavin was picking up his dishes. “I can dance.” I stopped and smiled at him over my shoulder. “I knew you must. You have such good rhythm.” He smiled in return. I took my dishes to the sink, rinsed and placed them in the dishwasher. Gavin brought his to the sink and I automatically took them from him, repeating the process. I figured there was no good reason Mary and Marie always had to do all the dishes. Gavin wrapped his arms around me and kissed my neck. “Where do you want to go dancing?” “I don’t know. No disco, but maybe some salsa and swing? I can’t do either, but I’m game to learn.” I wriggled away from Gavin and headed back into the dining room, stopping next to Raphael. “Oh, and I’ll need an ID that has my age at about twenty-two, twenty-one at the youngest.” Raphael froze, the fork halfway to his mouth, and looked curiously at me. “Why?” I put a hand on his shoulder. “Because, my dear Raphael, every twenty years or so I get blitzed and I’m way over due.” He looked pointedly at my hand, which I left right where it was, and then at me. “You’re going to get drunk?” “Precisely.” “That would be most imprudent of you.” “Most imprudent indeed. I plan to be most seriously imprudent.” “I’ll take care of her.” Gavin had joined us.

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They gave each other another of those inscrutable ‘Secret Society of Males’ looks and Raphael nodded at the credenza. “Top drawer. There’s a couple hundred dollars in the wallet and your IDs somewhere in there.” He returned to his meal. Gavin grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the door. “Come along, Charity. Let the nice man finish his dinner. We’ll take the Viper. We wouldn’t want to just appear somewhere in the middle of people.” I stopped. “Not that I don’t think these suits are nifty, but I thought I’d change into a black dress and something besides these boots.” Gavin laughed. “Right. Let’s go all out. Hurry though. I’m sure I’ll beat you down here, but if you manage to change first, wait right here.” I let go of his hand and raced him upstairs. Less than thirty minutes later, I headed downstairs in a nice sedate black silk wraparound with a full skirt and cap sleeves. I would have worn stilettos if I’d ever in my life learned to walk in them for more than half an hour. I wore wedges instead, not very sexy, but fashionable, and a lot safer for everyone. Both men looked up as I came downstairs and immediately stopped talking. Raphael rose from his customary place in the heavy cherrywood chair, but it was Gavin who caught my eye. He wore tight black pants, a loose black linen shirt, and black leather shoes, which only emphasized his ethereal golden curls and blue eyes. “Oh, my. You look good enough to be gay.” Raphael laughed, but Gavin just shook his head. “So, you think I look gay, do you?” “Gavin, there is no way, no how, you could ever look gay.” Raphael looked at me and then at Gavin and laughed. “Get out of here and have fun. Gavin?” “Uh-huh?” His eyes had yet to look away from me. “Gavin, have Cinderella home early and relatively intact.” “Uh-huh.” Gavin offered me his arm and finally looked at Raphael. “What did you say?” Raphael snorted. “Drive carefully, like with your eyes on the road. And try not to be stupid.” “Gotcha.” The drive into Scottsdale was necessarily long since the house was in the remote outskirts of Phoenix. Still, it was a pleasant drive. We managed to avoid anything personal or work-related, but still had plenty to discuss. The club had a distinctly Latin flavor. Neon light pictures and signs bathed everything in surreal colors that somehow matched the heavy base-flavored music from the live band. I was, at first, disappointed to see that Mark and Penny had a table waiting for us, but after a few minutes and a few drinks, I began to relax and have fun. I realized a party was just what I needed and I was glad others were with us. Brendan

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and Sharon arrived a few minutes later and our party was complete. Brent and Tracey were off Dancing together for a few days and couldn’t join us. I wondered again about their relationship. I’d never been in a group where only the women imbibed, but that happened in our group that night. I asked Gavin about it, but he only gave me that shrug that meant anything from ‘I don’t know’ to ‘enigmatic are the ways of the Sphinx and male Time Dancers or maybe just males in general’. He rose and I handed Sharon my purse. “Would you mind watching this for me for a few minutes?” “Sure thing, I’m not going anywhere. I’m planning to concentrate on my drinking for a while.” Gavin moved behind me and grabbed my hips. “Here we go. Your hips are mine.” I put my hands over his. “Lead on.” He moved with me at first until I’d gotten the basics then moved around me and grasped my hips from the front. “Put your arms on my shoulders and keep your head up.” Within an hour, we danced easily together, my arms draped loosely around his neck and his hands firmly on my hips. We executed spins and dips until my head spun, too. This was without a doubt my second favorite exercise. A young attractive man about twenty-two or twenty-three tapped Gavin’s shoulder and asked to cut in. I was flattered, but not interested in collecting scalps, so I said thank-you, but no before Gavin could answer. “Let’s get a drink.” I turned to Gavin. Something in his eyes gave me pause. “Gavin? Is something wrong?” He watched the young man walk away and join his friends before answering me. “No, everything’s fine. Come on, I’m thirsty.” We got back to the table and Mark looked up. “Everything okay?” “So far,” Gavin answered. I ignored them and sucked down a Marguerite. “Okay. Another one. I can still feel my nose.” “Your nose?” “Yep. If I can feel my nose, I haven’t had enough yet.” I smiled at Gavin and he put his arm around me. “Well, then I guess we’d better get more.” A couple more and I’d caught up with Sharon, if not in number then in effect. Each of the guys nursed a single beer while we women slung down pitchers of Marguerites. Without my even noticing it, I forgot about demons and rifts and just enjoyed myself. Gavin and I danced some more and so did the other couples. We danced until I lost track of time and just about everything else. The swing dancing was more difficult and a lot more tiring. I loved it, but slow dancing really heated me up. Moving together in sync to the pulsing music, the beat capturing and enclosing us, excluding everyone else, our bodies entwined, sliding against each other until I felt the sizzle in his hands. I think we were all having fun, but I really wasn’t looking at anyone else. Then came

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the unfortunate incident. Gavin said it was a good lesson. I told Gavin to go do something with himself that is anatomically impossible. I still think someone should have warned me. Penny and I decided to salsa together since the guys had gone to get more drinks and the music came on and all. It seemed like a good idea at the time. I think our guys had returned to our table just about the time these two other guys walked up to us. I saw Sharon point at us and then the two guys blocked my view of our table. “Hey, you two look like you could use some company.” I stopped trying to see around them and answered, “No thanks, we have all the company we want or need.” Penny grabbed my arm and tugged me toward our table. “Come on, Charity, our drinks are back.” “Charity, huh?” the tallest one grabbed my arm and smiled, “I like that.” The smell of tobacco and beer oozing from his pores turned my stomach. “You have no idea how much that pleases me.” His smile widened. Doesn’t anyone recognize sarcasm any more? “How about you show me some sweet charity?” “Is that what passes for clever repartee these days? Because if it is, I have serious concerns for this generation.” “Huh?” I turned to Penny, who worked on removing her arm from Short and Stout’s clutches when ‘Tall, Dark and Dumb’ decided to grab my arm. I jammed my finger in his chest. “Listen, Buddy, when a lady says no, she means no. Why don’t you and your little friend go find someone your own age and mental capacity?” I pulled harder, but no joy. This guy pissed me off. Kids these days, no respect. It didn’t occur to me until much, much later, after the hangover, that these guys were actually older physically than I was. By that time, Junior had finally caught on that I was less than enamored with him and possibly even insulting him. “Maybe someone should teach you some manners.” He squeezed my arm harder. I could no longer see Penny, but I did hear a chunk and a thud. This guy had pushed me way past pissed. I didn’t appreciate some big jerk manhandling me while trying to teach me manners he had never possessed. “First, you’d have to be able to recognize a manner when it bites you on the ass you fucking moron. Now let me go before you’re sorrier than you already are.” He actually drew back his hand to hit me. I took the opportunity to stomp on his instep, regretting now that I didn’t wear those stilettos. He released me to grab his injured foot and howl as he hopped around. “Remember that the next time you decide to slop your unwanted attention off on some poor female. And if you can’t control yourself, don’t drink.” I turned quickly around and ran into Gavin’s chest. “Oomph.” “Making friends again, darling?” I backed up a step and realized the entire club was clapping. Two burly bouncers had

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collected our friends and escorted them to the door. “He made me angry.” “I can see that. I’m glad I’m not the only one who warrants your giving them a broken foot.” He was having a difficult time not smiling. “However, I think our fun evening has ended.” “Yeah, okay.” I walked to our table with Gavin following. Penny had a towel with ice pressed against her jaw. “Penny, did that Neanderthal hit you?” Mark grinned. “She forgot to duck.” Penny glared at him. “I did not. You blocked my view.” Gavin explained, “Mark pulled the guy off Penny and the little guy took a swing at him. Mark ducked. Penny didn’t” Sharon, who had been lying up against Brendan, finished the story. “Penny got really mad then and decked the guy. He was still out cold when the bouncers came to break it up.” I looked at Penny’s hand, at the bruises already darkening her knuckles. “Remind me not to make you angry.” Penny snorted and lowered the towel to answer. “Me? Honey, you didn’t do too badly yourself.” Gavin laughed. “Did I ever tell you how we met? My foot still hurts.” I looked at him smugly. “People shouldn’t piss me off. And they really shouldn’t touch me without being invited.” Gavin slipped his arms around me from behind and rested his chin on my head. “I better be the only one you invite.” I smiled and leaned back, my arms resting over his. “As long as you take me dancing.” Brendan chuckled. “Well, I think we’ll call it a night.” He looked down at Sharon who slept against his arm, her soft snores barely audible, and kissed her hair. “My rose is wilting.” Gavin explained as we drove home that Dancers attract the opposite sex as well as other types of energy. Our enhanced bodies would attract attention even without the additional energy emanations, though. Centuries before, a male Dancer died in a fight over a female Dancer. “Our bodies can take a great deal of abuse and still heal, but we are human and there’s a limit; hence the ‘virtual’ part of virtually immortal.” “Why didn’t you warn me?” Gavin chuckled “I didn’t think you’d relax and enjoy yourself if you knew what might happen. And you deserved a night out to have worry-free fun.” What could I say? I mean, how many guys would let you get piss-eyed drunk knowing that they had to remain alert, that they might have to protect you? It sort of makes up for the times he acts all macho and superior. “You had fun, didn’t you?” The amusement in his voice didn’t even make me angry. I looked up at his chiseled profile and hoped that we had many more years together,

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but if we didn’t, I still wouldn’t have traded a single moment with him for a safe eternity without him. He glanced at me and chuckled. “Are you still there?” I slid my hand into his lap and stroked him. He drew in a quick breath. “I had a lot of fun and hopefully it’s not over yet.” The fire in the look he gave me then held no amusement. I laid my head against his shoulder, unfastened his belt, and unzipped his pants. “Charity, I don’t think…” “Then don’t think.” I pulled out his cock and stroked him, exploring and searching for what felt best. He stopped me when I tried taking him in my mouth. “I’m not going to explain to Raphael on the other side how I came to die in a car crash with my pants undone and my cock out right on the eve of possible world destruction.” I laughed but sobered a little and tucked him back together. I don’t have a clear picture of what happened after that, although I do remember taking a little nap and barfing my guts out on the lawn. Gavin carried me over his shoulder as he climbed the stairs. Not such a good idea as I hurled again upstairs. He did start the shower for me, though it was cold and he didn’t remove my clothes before sticking me in it. He laughed when I called him a few choice names, but he did turn on the hot water and help me strip. Funny how he managed to get himself naked right after that. I fell asleep wrapped in his robe and his arms, his magical hands massaging my neck and shoulders and then lower. The nausea was long gone and the remainder of the night passed in a sensual haze. If this is being taken advantage of, let him take advantage of me every night. ***** The sun peeking through the small slit between the curtains caught me squarely in the left eye, pinning a jagged schism of pain behind it. I groaned and tried rolling away from it, but Gavin’s arm held me securely on my back. I threw an arm over my eyes and tried lying still not to disturb my roiling stomach. Yeah, then I remembered why I only got drunk once every twenty years or so–the morning after sucks so very much. The last, first and only other time I’d gotten this drunk, I ended up pregnant and had nine months of morning sickness to boot. I could recall neither Prom night nor last night clearly, but I knew I’d at least enjoyed last night a hell of a lot more than Prom night. Gavin shifted and pulled me closer. It was all my queasy stomach needed to remind me yet again about the perils of overindulging. Exploding out of bed, I almost didn’t make it in time to the toilet. When I’d finished, I sat on the cold tile floor and laid my head on my arm resting on the toilet lid. I probably didn’t want to stray very far from my porcelain friend today. Rather than hearing or seeing Gavin, I felt his presence and moaned, “Go away and let me die in peace.”

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He laughed, an evil sounding thing, and I wasn’t sure he knew I was speaking literally and not metaphorically. “Poor baby. Here, I’ve brought you some Alka-Seltzer. If I recall, it works wonders.” I looked up through my poor blood-shot eyes and groaned, “Thank you.” He smoothed my hair back as I finished the cup he’d brought. I did feel a little better. He smiled when I looked up again, and I should have known what came next. “I’ll give you an extra half hour to dress this morning.” And then he left. I threw the empty glass at him, but missed. It was plastic anyway. I could hear his laughter all the way downstairs. My shower alone took the extra half hour, but it was as fast as I could manage. I added sunglasses to my normal training ensemble. Even the indirect lighting inside seemed too bright. Tiny little gremlins played anvils in my head, each step a hammer blow as I descended the stairs. Raphael sat at the kitchen counter reading the paper and drinking coffee. He slid a mug of the strong black brew to me without looking up from his reading or making any comment. For the first time since I’d been transformed, I drank the liquid caffeine. It hit my bloodstream almost immediately. I felt the warmth spread to every cell and my headache eased. I sighed long and audibly, closing my eyes to savor the effect. Raphael lowered his paper and cradled his mug in both hands taking a long draw of his own coffee. “Ah, Nirvana.” He set the mug back down and picked up his paper again. “I thank God every morning for the person who first got the strange idea to make a beverage out of those lovely little beans.” I chuckled and he lowered his paper to look at me. “You know, Charity, seeing you this morning reminds me of when Gavin was first changed. He got roaring drunk every night for a month and puked his guts out every morning. I feared for awhile that he might actually be a little simple and really not understand what caused his nausea and headaches.” I laughed outright. “I’m a much faster learner.” He raised his paper. “I thought you might be.” I rinsed out my mug, grabbed a piece of dry toast off the serving plate on the counter, and headed outside. Strangely enough, I felt much better. ***** The last Thursday in June, after an intense day of training, Gavin and I came into the house to find a roomful of strange people. The men stood and Raphael introduced them to us. “Gavin, Charity I’d like you to meet Ariel, Azrael, Gabriel, and Uriel. They’re my…brothers and sisters.” The women, Ariel and Gabriel, had long, dark curly hair and the men, Uriel and Azrael, had short, dark hair. They all had those strange, light blue eyes that Raphael had, the ones that pierced to your soul. Gavin and I shook hands all around. I couldn’t help staring. They were more than

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attractive; they were compelling. “Why don’t you two go up and get ready for dinner? We’ll discuss things then.” Raphael already led his siblings into the dining room. Gavin, as always, was calm and collected, but I could barely contain myself. Something was definitely up and I had a feeling I wouldn’t like the toy surprise. “Gavin, have you met his family before?” “Some of them.” “Oh, yeah? Are there more?” “Yes, about a dozen altogether.” “Do they all have those spooky wolf eyes?” Gavin laughed. “I didn’t notice before, but they do sort of look like wolf eyes, don’t they. Let’s shower together to save time.” I eyed him suspiciously. “Save time, huh? Seems to me that I’ve heard that line before.” We showered and he did nearly make me forget my excitement, at least about our dinner guests. I’m not so sure we saved any time, though. Mary outdid herself and we had lamb with mint sauce, fresh homemade rolls, steamed vegetables, mashed potatoes and gravy, salad, and wine. Raphael’s siblings were very intelligent, which I expected, but very funny, which I didn’t expect. They had the air of royalty, but insisted on being treated like ‘normal’ people. “You all have such Biblical names. Where did you get them?” I asked. “Our father is a very religious man”, Ariel answered. They all laughed at that, as though it were some great joke. I figured too much wine. “Yeah, and you didn’t even meet Michael yet.” This brought on a fresh round of laughter. “Hey, isn’t Azrael the name of the Angel of Death?” “Yes it is, and don’t think that hasn’t caused me considerable trouble over the years,” Azrael answered. “Let’s see, Raphael was the Archangel of Healing....” Gavin covered my hands in my lap and interrupted, “Let’s not give away all your secrets, Charity. They might be foolish enough to challenge us at Trivial Pursuit sometime.” That got another hearty laugh. Something had made Gavin uncomfortable enough to keep me from asking any more about them. I didn’t push it. The remainder of the evening proved relaxed and jovial. We finished another of Mary’s famous chocolate cakes and everyone rose to leave. Gavin and I shook hands all around and started up the stairs to our room when I heard Gabriel and Azrael ask to speak to Raphael a moment. More than Gabriel and Azrael’s voices, something in Raphael’s caught my attention when he asked them to follow him to the dining room. I left Gavin preparing for bed and silently crept down the stairs, keeping quietly to the shadows. I reached the landing and knelt down to peer at the trio through the railings. Azrael laid a supporting hand on Raphael’s shoulder. “We’re sorry, Rafe. We know how hard it is to lose a Dancer, even when it’s expected.” “Is this it then, Rafe?” Gabriel asked.

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Raphael shrugged. “I only know it’s time for this round to end.” Gabriel sighed. “You’re right. I guess we prepare for the worst as we always do. What about Charity? Does she know about …?” Azrael interrupted, “We have to be going.” He nodded in my direction. I gasped and the other two looked up at me. Raphael took a deep breath. “Charity, Gavin, come downstairs. We need to talk.” I gasped again when Gavin placed a hand on my shoulder, surprising me. Too intent on eavesdropping, I hadn’t heard him follow me. “I wondered where you’d gone.” He managed to make it sound accusing. Or else my conscience did. “Gavin, Charity,” Gabriel looked up at us smiling and finished, “good luck.” I nodded and stood as they left. Raphael turned and started back toward the dining room, signaling us to follow him. Without another word, we followed him out onto the patio leaving Mary and Marie cleaning up the dining room. “So, what’s up, Rafe?” Gavin asked. Raphael stood, hands in pockets seemingly fascinated with the visible stars. “Have you ever looked up into the night sky and wondered at the immensity of the heavens?” I frowned and looked up, trying to see whatever it was that had so captured Raphael’s attention then sat down in a lawn chair and asked, “Are we going to have another science lecture, Rafe?” Gavin chuckled and pulled up a chair and sat next to me. He lifted my hand and kissed the back before cradling it in his. Without looking at either of us, Raphael sat in a chair across from ours and stared out into the night. Crickets serenaded, their song slowing as the temperature grew cooler. Fingers steepled, Raphael finally looked up at us and said, “Brent was taken, you know.” “Taken?” “Yes.” Not lost or missing or killed, but taken. “What does taken mean?” Raphael looked at me and I thought I might have to repeat my question. Then I watched as his face fell and tears filled his eyes. He swallowed convulsively and visibly pulled himself together before answering. “He and Tracey were Dancing in Sedona. Tracey heard Brent shout and watched as something or someone pulled him into a rift. She didn’t see by what or whom, just that he was pulled in.” Raphael looked away. Tears gathered at the back of my throat more in sympathy with Raphael, whom I had never seen in such distress. The significance of this event had yet to hit me. I ignored the tears coursing down my cheeks and asked, “This is what Gabriel and Azrael came to tell you?” He nodded once and looked down at his hands. “This is more than losing a Dancer, isn’t it?” Gavin asked evenly. “It’s time, then?” Raphael looked at us. I watched pain, sorrow, regret and determination all cross his

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face in turn in the moments before answering. “Yes, time’s up. You and Charity will be needed very soon now.” “How soon?” Gavin’s business-like tone seemed to pull Raphael out of his grieving. “Not tonight and not tomorrow, but very soon now.” “How will you know?” Raphael smiled at me and I answered my own question, “I know. It’s your job to know.” Raphael smiled sadly and rose. “I’ll talk to you more in the morning, but make plans to get away this weekend. It might be your last chance…for awhile, anyway.” He turned toward the door. “If you’ll excuse me, I have arrangements to make, so I’ll say goodnight now.” Without waiting for an answer, he headed for the house. Seeing Raphael’s uncharacteristic show of emotion had really thrown me. It did what every strange thing that had happened to me these last weeks, including meeting Satan, had failed to do. I felt my own mortality and feared I really might die. The danger felt real and eminent, like I could reach out and touch it…or it could touch me. I stood and pulled Gavin up with me. “Take me to bed now and make me forget there’s a tomorrow.” He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead. “It would be my pleasure.” I woke once during the long night, crying from a dream I couldn’t recall. But Gavin was there. He pulled me to him, his arms and the warmth of his body lulled me back into a dreamless sleep.

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Chapter Twelve I woke early Friday, a strange compulsion to go downstairs driving me. Leaving Gavin still sleeping, I dressed and grabbed my sweatshirt for a workout and hurried to the kitchen where I found Raphael waiting, a cup of coffee for me in his hand. “Drink up Charity. We need to talk.” “Okay, what’s up?” “Finish your coffee first.” I did the best I could to down the scalding liquid in as short a time as possible. Something in Raphael’s demeanor frightened me, but I couldn’t imagine how things could be any worse than the future we faced. Raphael showed me. I lowered the cup and set it on the counter. “What now, Boss?” He took my hand and moments later, we stood at Sunrise in my daughter Carrie’s favorite spot. This told me two things. First, Raphael had known all along about my visits to see my children. And second, he didn’t want anyone, including Gavin, to overhear. “Let’s walk.” He started forward and I followed. I didn’t ask what he wanted to tell me. I didn’t really want to know. We reached the top of the hill overlooking the bare ski lift path and he stopped, turning to face me. “Charity, this final fight will require a great sacrifice on your part. Something you alone will have to do.” “Okay.” “Remember when I told you that you’d know everything you needed to know by the time this thing ended?” I nodded. “Well, here’s just about the last thing there is to learn. You wanted to know why no other Dancers had ever faced as dangerous and as massive an attack as the one you and Gavin will face.” “It just seems strange that the first time Lucifer manages to put together such a substantial effort doesn’t happen until so very long after the beginning of Creation.” “That’s because it isn’t. It’s happened many times, the last time about five hundred years ago.” Now that was really confusing. “How come no one remembers?” “All memory of the Dancers and the rifts has been removed.” “Removed from where?” “Everywhere. Everyone.” “But why? Wouldn’t the experiences help other Dancers?” “No.” “Why not?” “Because these kinds of rifts can only be healed by the ultimate sacrifice–a life freely given. Not exactly a good recruiting point. Everyone who knows either you or Gavin as Dancers will have their memories wiped, too.” I’ve heard it said that there are two kinds of people–givers and takers. But I think most

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people are a combination of the two. For most of my forty-two years, I’d been a giver. I gave until it hurt, and then gave until it crippled. For the last couple of years I’d tried hard to learn to be a combination of the two, to learn how to accept as well as to give, only to discover that now I’d be called upon to be the quintessential giver. No, he couldn’t be asking that. Placing my hands on my hips, I glared at him. “Raphael, exactly what are you saying?” “I’m sorry, Charity, but it’s the only way.” “Tell me exactly how this ‘only way’ works.” He sighed and I folded my arms, waiting. “You have to understand. You were born for just this purpose, for this particular time, for this particular place, for this particular rift. Your sacrifice will be the only thing that can heal this rift.” “My sacrifice?” I paused, understanding his meaning at last. “How would my sacrifice heal anything?” His tone grew deeper and quieter. “This rift has been hundreds of years in the making. All normal methods of healing, even the energy of mated Dancers, won’t be enough. Gavin has trained longer than any other Dancer, becoming the best Dancer ever for the sole purpose of being able to Dance the rift long enough for the energy to reach the point where you’ll be able to step in and destroy it.” Dread, cold and painful, settled deep in my gut and spread. It looked more and more as though what I thought impossible might actually be the truth. “Obviously I don’t survive, but what about Gavin? You’re not asking me to sacrifice him, too, are you?” “And if I were?” “Then I’d say no.” We watched each other for several minutes, neither of us speaking or showing any emotion. Finally, he smiled. “No, he’d have to make that choice anyway. He won’t be able to return to his old life, though. He knows too much and he’d be miserable without you. He’d probably be more than a little angry, too.” “You think?” He ignored me. “As I told you, Gavin and everyone’s memory of him and you as Dancers will have to be erased. He’ll be returned to his own timeline none the wiser.” “Raphael, I thought that what happens to one of us happens to the other.” He shrugged. “Usually, but this isn’t usual. Gavin will be returned safely to his timeline.” “And me?” I asked, still hoping against hope. He smiled sadly. “Charity, no one gets to know what comes in the hereafter for them; otherwise, faith would be superfluous. A sacrifice is only a sacrifice if it comes at a price.” So now, I knew. The future depended on me, but I had no future. I turned my head from him and stared into the distance. Thoughts and feelings came faster than I could assimilate.

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I still hadn’t finished digesting everything when Raphael asked, “You okay?” There were too many thoughts in my head and no room to consider his question. Was I okay? I was stunned and afraid, saddened and alarmed. I wanted to run and hide, pretend and deny, maybe sleep for a week and escape the pain and pressure of having to come to terms with the inevitable. Was I okay? I’d never be okay again, because I knew I had no choice. When you’re told the world can only survive if you don’t, what choice is there? There is only coming to terms with the inevitable. Was I okay? Raphael put his hand on my shoulder, obviously concerned by what he saw in my face. “Charity, did you hear me? Are you okay?” I sat suddenly, forgetting how to work my legs. Raphael bent over, still holding onto my upper arm. “Charity?” I pulled my arm from his grasp, raised my bent knees, and wrapped my arms around them, staring sightlessly in front me. I felt Raphael sit next to me, felt his gaze on my face and his concern. “Charity?” I turned to look at him. “Are you okay?” I looked away again, into the distance and muttered, “Just peachy,” my words harsher than I’d meant. I looked at him again. “How long have you known it had to be this way? Always?” He watched me steadily, keeping my eyes locked with mine. “Yes, always.” “Then why?” I knew my whiny voice didn’t help, but the frustration was overwhelming. “Why didn’t you tell me from the beginning?” He looked away from me then. I knew what a foolish question it had been. Who would agree to certain death? Did Gavin know? “Does Gavin know anything?” Raphael’s head snapped up, his eyes fastened on mine. “Of course not, and he can never be told any of it. He’d never agree, not even before.” “Before what?” He frowned and I could see him take pains to control himself, his speech and tone, even his expression. “Charity, Gavin would rather you weren’t involved at all.” He took my hand then and, for a moment, I wanted the comfort. But then I realized that once again I’d been led down the garden path. Now I might have to go there anyway, but I wanted it to be my choice and I wanted to make that choice for the right reasons. I pulled my hand from his and asked, “Why Gavin, why me, and how do you know, Raphael?” Raphael seemed at a loss for words. He started to speak and stopped after looking at me. Obviously frustrated, he tried a few more times then stopped trying altogether. Finally, he smiled and shook his head. “Charity, do you know the difference between angels and men and why mankind is so favored?” Huh? “I guess I never thought about it.”

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“Man has free choice. You have free choice. Even choosing not to choose is a choice. Faith is believing without seeing first. Some choices you have to make on faith.” “And?” “And, it’s Gavin because he’s the only Dancer, soul mate or not, capable of working the rift long enough. You, Charity, are preordained to do this, not Gavin, not me, not any other Dancer ever born. That’s why Gavin and that’s why you.” I watched him for a moment, but he seemed to be finished. “And how do you know?” He shrugged. “Like I keep telling you, it’s my job to know.” I looked away, shaking my head. “How am I supposed to believe all this? How do I take it all in? I can’t even talk to Gavin. How am I supposed to know what to do?” His enigmatic smile did nothing to reassure me. “See, that’s the thing. You have to take it all on faith.” I snorted. “Right. The check’s in the mail and I promise I’ll pull out in time. I think I’ll require a little more information. My faith seems to be in short supply here.” He shook his head. “I’m constantly amazed at the vulgarity that spews from such a lovely mouth.” “Flattery will get you nowhere.” He laughed and stood, offering me his hand. “Then I suppose I’ll have to be content with letting my track record and your impeccable instincts and better judgment convince you.” I took his hand, letting him help me to stand. “You may want to reconsider letting my better judgment and your track record convince me of anything.” He lifted my hand to his lips and kissed the back. Patting it affectionately, he answered, “See this?” I looked at our joined hands and then into his face, raising my eyebrows in silent question. “You don’t think twice about giving me your hand. You instinctively know you can trust me.” I pulled my hand from his. “I’ll leave you to think it over. I have faith in your judgment and know you’ll choose the right path.” “Is that it, then?” I asked without a smile. “What more could there be?” “That’s not an answer.” “No, it’s not.” “It’s not fair, you know.” “No, it really isn’t.” He smiled, bowed and Stepped Out, leaving me to ponder my options, such as they were, alone. I wondered aimlessly down the hill. The air had taken on a definite bite. Glad that I’d worn my sweatshirt, I lifted the hood and pulled the drawstrings tight. I may not have known exactly who or what Raphael was, but I did know that I could trust what he told me about the rift. I guess I did still have a little faith left.

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You ask yourself things like would your risk you life for a stranger, but you never really know until the situation presents itself. Most acts of heroism are impulse reactions and not well-thought-out plans. It’s one thing to throw yourself in front of a bullet, but a completely different thing to walk into the lion’s den. And risking your life is different than deliberately sacrificing it. I knew that I was reckless at times and would easily risk my life for most anyone, but self-preservation is also one of my favorite practices. I guess the end would be a surprise to all of us. Maybe even to Raphael. ***** This was the most use my family’s cabin had seen in years. On Raphael’s suggestion, we decided to spend a couple days here. The time was near. At the high elevation even June evenings were cool, so we lit a fire in the fireplace. The clean, fresh air and scent of burning logs relaxed me right away. I sat next to Gavin on the sofa in front of the fire. I brought him a beer, but a hot cocoa for myself. I’d had my limit of alcoholic beverages for a couple decades at least. I sat and folded my legs up onto the sofa, snuggling close to Gavin who draped an arm around me. His T-shirt smelled of him, the scent I’d come to associate with safety and peace…and love. "When I was young, days stretched out in front of me like endless rows of corn. Nothing and no one changed. Then I turned twelve, my parents divorced, and I learned that life consisted of consequences resulting from the choices we make. "My world wasn’t safe. It wasn’t even predictable. So I surrounded myself with controllable things and made myself a controllable life. “Growing up too soon makes you a might skittish, so I became the person everyone could depend on, never rocked the boat, just accepted what life threw at me. I married and figured if I did everything Ed wanted, took care of all the messy details of everyday living, then he would love me and never leave me. I was wrong.” “Did you love him so very much then?” I snorted. “I thought I did. I made him and the children my entire universe, cut myself off from almost everyone and everything else. I gave myself no out and made it impossible for me to be anything but devoted.” I looked up into Gavin’s eyes, wanting him to understand. “I put up with Ed’s cheating, his shouting, and the horrible temper tantrums because I thought I was being loyal, that marriage was forever.” “There’s nothing wrong with being loyal.” I shook my head. “No, that’s just it. There are many ways to leave. I just didn’t choose a physical one. I fooled myself into thinking that if I just did the right thing, none of the blame would be mine. I didn’t think I could live alone. I thought just about anything would be better than being alone. I was so wrong. There are a lot worse things.” “And when he left?” “I did think, for a short time, that I wouldn’t make it. My kids had already left home and I’d never lived by myself. But each day passed and life went on. Mechanically at first,

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then with purpose, my life continued to improve until I was whole again, even better than before. I finally grew up.” “And then I came along and fucked it all up again.” I placed my hand on his cheek and turned his face toward me. “No, you came along and made me realize that the only control we really have is how we choose to react to what life brings. I know now that needing is not loving and loving someone should be an act of generosity, not desperation. I also know that if you left, I’d be okay because I still have what I came in with–myself. “Then what am I to you?” I smiled. “You are the first person I feel I’ve truly loved without needing to.” I saw the confusion on his face. “You needed to love everyone else?” “Yeah. I loved my parents and my children because they’re my parents and my children. I loved Ed because I got pregnant and married him. How could I not love him? I stayed married because that’s what I was supposed to do, so how could I not? Finally, he left and I realized what I felt for him had long before ceased to be love. I’m sure that I did love him at one time; I just don’t know when I stopped. Love rarely dies all at once. It expires piece by agonizing piece. “Now you, you I loved in spite of my better judgment. We won’t have kids together and we won’t grow old together because we won’t grow old. Still, I don’t have to love you. I just do.” “And I love you, too, for no particular reason.” He kissed me then and I felt the connection, the sense of belonging, of having someone on your side. It had been ages. “Now tell me about being a slave.” I learned then about the heartache and the feelings of hopelessness and longing. I learned how he mourned and started living again, determined to one day be a free man until he grew too tired to wait any longer. He told me about the beauty of a world without polluted air and water. How this beauty faded against a microcosm of brutality and superstition. He told me how he learned so very many things then had to relearn them as man’s knowledge changed. And during all those years, Raphael was there training him, but never giving him more information than Gavin needed for the moment. “Do you believe Raphael and his siblings are something more than human?” I asked. “Probably, but it doesn’t make any difference as long as they’re on our side. Rafe tells me what he wants to tell me, but nothing more. I wouldn’t do anything any differently, so I stopped asking a long time ago.” He watched me a moment and sighed. “You just may have to reconcile yourself to never knowing for sure what Raphael’s true nature is while you’re on this side of eternity.” I shrugged. I’d let it go. Eternity would come sooner for me than Gavin realized. He gathered me close and we stared into the fire, each of us with our own demons. I looked down at his hands with mine clasped in them. His hands displayed his strength and

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gentleness in the way they covered and cradled mine, in the way the muscles and tendons flexed and played under the surface as they moved. His smile lit up the room and every last corner of my heart. He pulled me onto his lap and kissed my breath away. I wound my arms around his neck and returned his kiss wholeheartedly. He stood with me still in his arms and attached to his lips, and carried me to the bedroom. We came together the same way we Danced together–in harmony and natural rhythm. I wished we would have more time together, but was grateful for the little we’d been granted. I kept from crying, laughing, or any other behavior to relieve tension knowing that it would make Gavin suspicious. Still, he sensed my desperation and need and proceeded to show me the slow side of passion, and the funny side, and the lazy side, until night became day. We returned home that afternoon to face our destinies. ***** We returned Sunday morning to find Raphael awaiting us. “It’s time.” We changed into our suits for the last time, neither of us speaking. I prepared to do what I had to do. I had only a few more hours to keep the truth from Gavin, making it much easier than it could have been. Of course, Raphael had probably known this all along. I should be angry about being finessed yet again, but all I felt was relief. “Ready?” I looked up into Gavin’s smiling face, and smiled back. A surge of emotion took me and I threw myself into his arms. “Hey, what’s this? Everything will be fine. We’re both ready and just think; soon we’ll be living out our lives in quiet boredom.” I pulled back and laughed, unable to stop the tears tracing down my face. “From your lips to God’s ear.” He lowered his head to mine and kissed me gently. Just a little while longer. Raphael waited downstairs for us, his usual calm firmly in place. “I’ll be here waiting.” Gavin deadpanned, “You don’t know how much better that makes me feel.” Raphael ignored him. “Charity?” “Oh, it makes me feel better, too.” I hoped my sarcasm covered my fear. Raphael touched my arm and smiled sadly, as I looked up into his face. “Are you ready?” I would not cry. “Does it matter?” He dropped his hand. “No, I guess it really doesn’t.” “Don’t worry, Rafe. I always do what I should. That’s why I’m here, right?” “I am sorry, Charity.” “The pathway to Hell is paved with good intentions.” Both men looked startled. I pulled myself together and managed a smile. “Don’t

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worry, Rafe. Everything will end as it was always meant to end.” I turned toward Gavin. “Come on, Gavin. Let’s not keep this sonofabitch waiting.” I grabbed his hand and together we Stepped Out for our last Dance.

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Chapter Thirteen We stood in Death Valley, surrounded by miles of desiccated dust and dirt. Ironically resembling water, waves of heat already rose in the early morning light distorting the distant view. The early hour, and the fact that is was the first part of June, saved us from deadly heat. I felt the tug of the rift before I even saw it. I started toward it, but Gavin grabbed my hand, pulling me to his side. “Wait, Charity, see what’s under the surface first.” I stared in the direction of the tug and concentrated. Beautiful and beguiling crimson light tumbled through a scarlet slash, spilling over the landscape like water over a thirsty field. The light flickered and undulated beckoning me to follow. I took a step and froze. A wriggling mass of indistinct and malodorous shapes covered the rift slithering around and over the surface like hungry maggots. Their fetid stench, thick and palpable, made it impossible to get any closer. I waited and watched, concentrating harder on the shapes, trying to identify them. “Demons.” Gavin turned and spat into the dirt in disgust. I do envy guys some of the mannerisms they’re able to employ with impunity–adjusting their crotch during athletic games, watching TV with their hands down their unfastened pants, and hocking loogies in disgust. I saw the little devils and not so little devils clearly now. Their iridescent scales glittered in the early dawn light like beetle wings. They swarmed over and around the fissure tearing at it. The wounded frame singed them, adding burnt dog hair smell to the miasma. It amazed me that I hadn’t noticed anything but the call of the rift when we’d first arrived. Gavin grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips to kiss the back, then laced our fingers together and squeezed. “Ready?” I nodded. “Good. Now normally we’d try for calm, but for these guys, we need power, but controlled power. Don’t let it get away from you.” “Okay.” “Oh, and Charity?” “Uh-huh?” He held my cheek in his free hand. “I love you.” I covered his hand with mine and leaned my face into his palm. “I love you too, Gavin. Now let’s take care of this so we can go home,” I managed to choke out. Hand in hand, we walked through the field of demons toward the pull of the rift. If I said I wasn’t afraid, I’d be lying and you wouldn’t believe me anyway. Wading through the morass of writhing malevolence proved painful in every sense of the word. Although we repelled even the most vile and persistent of them, they still managed to come close enough to score burns, gouges and scraps. Our suits proved useful protection for more than just rifts. The suit didn’t lessen the non-physical pain, however. Barbs of pure evil, malicious and

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sharp bombarded my subconscious like hyper-PMS. I glanced at Gavin, whose normally calm mien had disappeared; replaced by a frown that looked nearly distraught. I realized that what appeared as bitchiness in me manifested itself in worry and self-doubt in Gavin. I reacted with rage, turning my aura a deep blood red. It radiated outward into even the visible spectrum. The demons closest to us covered what assumed were their ears and roared in obvious pain, scurrying in an effort to escape the perimeter defined by our auras. Surprised, I looked over at Gavin, who laughed hysterically. Gavin losing control was a very frightening sight. I really started to worry. I held his arm, trying to make him look me in the eye. “Gavin? Are you okay? What’s wrong?” He looked at me then, composing himself. “Don’t you see?” Confused, I shook my head. “See what?” “All this time I tried to teach you control so that you could withstand the mental as well as the physical torture we faced.” “I know. I’m not a very good student.” “No, no, that’s not it. In five minutes you’ve shown me the error of centuries–no– millennia of training.” His arm swept across the scene, gesturing at the fallen and scampering demons. “Look what happened because you got angry.” He moved closer and took my hand. "Now, let’s show them what we’re like together.” He kissed the palm of my hand as we both turned toward the rift, which had increased in size and power. Our path was clear now, no demons attempted to get near us or to block our way. Heat radiated from the crimson fissure like flames. Although demons had scattered away from the rent at our approach, it might have been too late. The opening ran about six feet by eight feet, by far the largest I’d ever seen. I looked closer and saw the tattered edges circumscribing the fracture. The demons had done a real job on it. Gavin and I separated. He took the left and I walked to the right. Tentatively, I raised my hands trying to get a feel for the damage done. I could barely touch the edges, but I knew I’d have to find a way to touch more, much more. Fear crawled and bloomed in my throat, making swallowing difficult. Cold sweat dampened under my arms and crawled down my back. I reached into the gaping cavity letting the orange and red colored energies roll over me. They seared my fingers as I pushed at them, trying to mend the wound. Pieces flew off as fast as I could push them together. Rivulets of sweat formed pathways down my face and sides. Gavin wasn’t having much luck, either. “Together, Charity.” I looked up at Gavin and nodded, stepping closer to the middle. An intermediate goal now in mind, I fought the pain and worry and concentrated on reaching him. Together we pushed at the outer edges of the rift. Darts of pain pierced me through my protective suit. My stomach, back and arms would be a mass of welts, burns and bruises. I

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laughed to myself. At least I’d be spared dealing with that later. Fury, fierce and burning, blasted through me. The edges of my aura, shimmering scarlet, became visible, expanding to meet the fresh leaks spilling through the break. Gavin’s eyes widened, watching me and the increased power rolled off him into the gash. We made headway and closed enough of the tear to see into the center of the aperture. My arms quivered in exhaustion and I saw the fatigue that pulled at Gavin. Sweat dotted his forehead and upper lip, pouring off me. I knew it wouldn’t be enough. All that had ever been would cease to be. Unless I finished it. Thunder and lightening announced Satan’s arrival. How déclassé can, you get? I suppose if the fate of the world weren’t literally in my hands, I might have been more impressed, but I’d long ago reached the limit of the amount of fear I could feel. “Charity, Gavin, so nice to see you again. You know you can’t win. Why not give up now and step over to the winning side before it’s too late.” I knew he’d like nothing better than to stick it to ‘The Big Guy’ a little more by corrupting a couple Dancers along with destroying Creation. “Neither of you has to die. One or both of you can widen the tear and hasten the world’s demise. The choice is up to you, free will and all. The choice you make will decide your fate. It won’t help or hinder the sure and eminent destruction of everything. It’s merely a formality. Not even Raphael dares show himself now.” The smile he gave us after his little speech was truly the most horrific thing I’d ever witnessed. His soulless eyes contained only death and evil, a fathomless pit of bleak despair. I knew Lucifer only lied when he opened his mouth, and something Raphael had said when I first met him about no good being found in Evil helped me to remember that the only choice left that would make any difference would be mine. The depth of the miasma of depression was palpable. I inhaled despair and gloom with each breath. Dread settled heavily between my shoulders adding to the ache of strained muscles. I had no idea how I would know the right moment to step into the rift, but my body wouldn’t last much longer. On the brink of giving up, the center of the rift cleared and Raphael’s face appeared. He smiled and nodded. “It’s time, Charity.” I looked around quickly, but it was obvious that no one else, not even Lucifer, saw him. “Of course, if you wait too long,” Lucifer shrugged, “the whole thing becomes moot and your chance to choose disappears.” I watched Satan dispassionately. “No, we wouldn’t want to lose our chance to choose.” In the end, I did know what my choice would be. After all, what would it matter if I saved Gavin, or myself, or even both of us? Even if one of us actually lived when the other died, the resulting world would be odorless, tasteless, and colorless with nothing to hear and nothing to see. All that makes life and being human worthwhile would be gone–better the worst day in Heaven than the best day in Hell. “Now, Charity.” I looked at Raphael again, wondering for an instant why, with all his power, I had to be The One.

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The answer flashed through my mind. I was preordained and had free choice, neither of which applied to Raphael. I nodded and Raphael smiled, seeming to understand. Loving warmth enveloped me, a euphoric sense of well-being and hope. “You’ve done well, Charity and now it’s time.” He disappeared, but the feeling of peace stayed and spread. Tears streamed down my face as I looked once more into Gavin’s forever eyes, praying fervently that some small memory of me stayed with him. I saw the realization hit Gavin and knew that he sensed something of the truth... ***** As I’ve often said, my life, like any other, has been a cautionary tale of wasted chances, broken dreams, and stale promises, but I’ve also been blessed with knowing where I fit in The Plan. We come into the world alone and leave the same way. But if we’re very lucky, we have the chance to share ourselves, all of ourselves, in between with those we love. Today, I am the luckiest person on the face of the Earth. I watch the crimson light bleed from a gaping hole pouring like clotted blood over surface of the Time Frame holding it all. I expect soon to see and hear the grinding explosion/implosion roar as darkness overruns the light. I expect I’ll feel, for an instant, the exquisite pain of annihilation, taste the metallic tang of my own blood filling my mouth as all my cells are unmade. It was all worth it. I mouth, “I love you” to Gavin. His expression changes to panic. He has figured out my next move and I know that I have to act quickly before he can stop me. I step into oblivion, Gavin’s “No” echoing in my head. ***** Raphael hurried into the boardroom, fearing he might be late, but saw that only Michael had arrived. Michael half stood and shook hands, a rare smile lighting his face. Taking the seat next to him, Raphael relaxed and looked around. “Anyone joining us, Mike?” Michael shook his head. “No need, things are calm for a little while anyway.” He leaned back and studied Raphael a moment. “That was a near thing, Rafe.” Raphael grinned. “A miss is as good as a mile, so they say.” “Indeed they do. Still, sometimes it’s okay to hit a homerun, you know. Any residual problems or concerns?” “Only that the intelligence on the timing could have been disastrous. Had it been anyone besides Charity and Gavin....” Raphael shrugged. “Yes. It nearly bit us in the ass this time. Luc almost succeeded. Don’t think the Higher Ups didn’t notice that. Gabby thought for sure she’d get out of the batter’s box this time. Warmed up the old horn and everything.” Michael leaned back in his chair and grinned.

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“Wish I could have seen Luc’s face.” Raphael laughed. “Oh, it was priceless, especially to have been dealt defeat by Gavin and someone like Charity. She may not have sounded or looked like it, but her passion and faith were boundless, not to mention her tenacity. Still, sacrificing your life is a lot to ask of anyone.” “Yes, you’d think after all this time, Luc would know not to underestimate the power of free will, choice and self-sacrifice. By the way, any problems on that front?” “Not really, though I think Gavin guessed something years ago. He had to wait so long for Charity that he was around longer than most Dancers with plenty of unoccupied time to get curious. I guess it’s moot now. He was returned unharmed, intact and clueless to his own timeline and no one has any memory of him or Charity as Dancers.” Michael sighed. “Well, it won’t be long now. The Era of Man has about played out and I’m more than ready. The last century was a bit draining and this one looks even worse.” He stacked his papers in his briefcase and latched it. “Until next time then, Rafe.” “Yeah, next time or you could come visit with the others every once in awhile.” Michael smiled. “I think I’d like that.” They rose and shook hands. Raphael turned to leave but stopped halfway to the door. He snapped his fingers and turned back to face Michael. “I nearly forgot about the new Dancers?” “Yes, one needs to be picked up Monday and the other in a month or so. I’ll fax you the details. Look the profiles over and get Tracey to help you recruit if you need to.” “Good. I will. It’s been much too long since I had the house to myself. Strangely, I don’t think I’ll like it much.” He turned back and opened the door quickly to leave, his step and heart light for a change. Already planning the training curriculum for the new Dancers, Raphael left the office building oblivious to the admiring stares of men and women alike. Whistling jauntily, he briskly made his way through the crowd. God was in his heaven and all was right with the world.

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Epilogue My name is Charity Donovan. I’m a relatively normal forty-two-year-old divorcée. My best friend Cammy convinced me to attend one of her parties, though every fiber of my being rebelled. She promised me a prospective buyer for my family’s cabin. I wasn’t really fooled. She’d been trying to set me up ever since my divorce from ‘the snake’ two years ago. But I hoped I might really get a legitimate offer for the cabin this time. I’d already had a couple fortifying drinks, so I managed to network a little and talk to absolute strangers. Yeah, I know what a bad idea using alcohol for a backbone is, but I’d been out of circulation so long I needed a shortcut. I actually managed to forget my discomfort long enough to enjoy myself. I’d spent the last fifteen minutes debating time travel and folding space with a group of nerds like myself when Cammy broke into our geek circle to pull me away. “Oh, you are soooo going to thank me. This guy is luscious and, surprisingly enough, has the same likes you do.” She led me toward the terrace. “Thanks a lot. I love you too.” She laughed merrily and laid a hand on my arm. “Oh, you know what I mean. He talks kind of nerdy, but he’s a dreamboat.” Does anyone really say “dreamboat” anymore? “Well, as long as we can talk nerdy to each other, what else matters?” Totally missing the sarcastic note I’d definitely put in my words, she stopped and looked as if she was actually thinking about what I’d said. “It is rather strange. He’s a renowned photographer, but he likes that boring stuff. You know, the stuff you like.” She seemed determined to insult me no matter how unintentional. Imagine what she could do if she tried. “Dare I ask what you mean by stuff I like?” We’d started toward the terrace again. “That time stuff.” We stepped outside. “Here we are.” With the sun setting directly ahead on the horizon, I couldn’t see anyone right away. “Gavin Carpenter, this is Charity Donovan. She owns the cabin that you’re interested in.” Shrouded in shadows from the incandescent lighting and setting sun, I couldn’t see his face clearly at first. I extended my hand and he took it, the warmth of his grip traveling up my arm. Confused, I looked down at our joined hands, but didn’t see anything unusual. “I’ve been looking forward to meeting you, Ms. Donovan.” I looked up able to see him now. “Charity, please.” “And I’m Gavin.” In his early forties, Gavin’s curly blond hair held few gray streaks. His body spoke of years of physical work. But it was his eyes that drew my attention. Deep sapphire, they

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looked as though he’d seen the pain and the sorrow, the joy and the laughter of the ages–an old soul. I locked gazes and couldn’t–no wouldn’t– look away. He smiled and I felt as though I’d come home. “I saw you with Cammy and James last week at that charity baseball game, but I couldn’t break away to meet you. I’m glad I finally got the chance.” I remembered the game. I like baseball, which is the only reason I’d agreed to go. Well, that and the free tickets. So, he’d actually seen me before and he still came to meet me? “So, Charity, would you like to talk about the cabin now or later?” “Uh-huh.” I shook my head. “Anytime would be fine.” He chuckled. “Maybe we could go get some coffee? Or…I have a really good coffee maker at home.” I figured he could see okay and knew that while he looked like a Boticelli angel, I looked like someone’s mother. I had no money and the family cabin certainly wasn’t anything special. Maybe he really was attracted to me or at least not repulsed. I certainly found him appealing. Who wouldn’t? I’d never done anything like this before, but somehow it seemed right. His eyes held the promise of tomorrow and tomorrow’s tomorrow. So, I looked into those forever eyes and answered, “I think I’d really like to see your coffee maker.” The End