!CHIEVEYOUR'/!,3
WORKLIFE
WORKLIFE
4RANSFORMTHEWAY YOULIVEANDWORK !CHIEVEYOUR
'/!,3
3TRATEGIESTOTRANSFORMYOURLI...
365 downloads
2167 Views
10MB Size
Report
This content was uploaded by our users and we assume good faith they have the permission to share this book. If you own the copyright to this book and it is wrongfully on our website, we offer a simple DMCA procedure to remove your content from our site. Start by pressing the button below!
Report copyright / DMCA form
!CHIEVEYOUR'/!,3
WORKLIFE
WORKLIFE
4RANSFORMTHEWAY YOULIVEANDWORK !CHIEVEYOUR
'/!,3
3TRATEGIESTOTRANSFORMYOURLIFE !.$93-)4(
!.$93-)4(
1_ED245_US 1 &&'#&&+#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ'
!CHIEVE 9OUR'OALS
31/7/06 4:51:33 pm '(%*%&,'&0*&0*(Wc
2_ED245_US 2 &&'#&&+#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ(
31/7/06 4:51:34 pm '(%*%&,'&0*(0+)Wc
!CHIEVE 9OUR'OALS 3TRATEGIESTO TRANSFORMYOURLIFE
!.$93-)4(
3_ED245_US 3 &&'#&&+#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ)
31/7/06 4:51:36 pm '(%*%&,'&0*)0&/Wc
,/.$/. .%79/2+ -5.)#( -%,"/52.% $%,()
#ONTENTS
0RODUCEDFOR$ORLING+INDERSLEY BYTERRYJEAVONSCOMPANY
)TS5PTO9OU
0ROJECT%DITOR 0ROJECT!RT%DITOR $ESIGNER 0ICTURE2ESEARCHER
3OPHIE#OLLINS 4ERRY*EAVONS !NDREW-ILNE 3ARAH(OPPER
4AKE2ESPONSIBILITY
3ENIOR%DITOR 3ENIOR!RT%DITOR %DITOR $40$ESIGNER 0RODUCTION#ONTROLLER
3IMON4UITE 3ARA2OBIN %LIZABETH7ATSON 4RACI3ALTER 3TUART-ASHETER
%XECUTIVE-ANAGING%DITOR !DÒLE(AYWARD -ANAGING!RT%DITOR +ARLA*ENNINGS !RT$IRECTOR 0UBLISHER
0ETER,UFF #ORINNE2OBERTS
3PECIAL0HOTOGRAPHY
!DRIAN4URNER
&IRST!MERICAN%DITION 0UBLISHEDINTHE5NITED3TATESBY$+0UBLISHING (UDSON3TREET .EW9ORK .9 #OPYRIGHT¥$ORLING+INDERSLEY,IMITED 4EXTCOPYRIGHT¥!NDY3MITH !LLRIGHTSRESERVEDUNDER)NTERNATIONALAND0AN !MERICAN #OPYRIGHT#ONVENTIONS.OPARTOFTHISPUBLICATIONMAY BEREPRODUCED STOREDINARETRIEVALSYSTEM ORTRANSMITTED INANYFORMORBYANYMEANS ELECTRONIC MECHANICAL PHOTOCOPYING RECORDINGOROTHERWISE WITHOUTTHEPRIOR WRITTENPERMISSIONOFTHECOPYRIGHTOWNER0UBLISHEDIN 'REAT"RITAINBY$ORLING+INDERSLEY,IMITED !#ATALOGING IN 0UBLICATIONRECORDFORTHISBOOKIS AVAILABLEFROMTHE,IBRARYOF#ONGRESS
$EVELOP9OUR0ERSONAL 0OWER #LEAR9OUR)NNER#LUTTER 4HE0OWEROF9OUR 5NCONSCIOUS &OCUSON7HAT9OU7ANT ,OOKAT9OUR,IFE !PPRECIATIVELY
$EVELOP9OUR3ELF !WARENESS
$ECIDE7HATS )MPORTANT ,OOK!HEAD +NOW9OUR6ALUES 2ESOLVE6ALUES#ONmICTS
)3". %$ $+BOOKSAREAVAILABLEATSPECIALDISCOUNTSFORBULK PURCHASESFORSALESPROMOTIONS PREMIUMS FUND RAISING OR EDUCATIONALUSE&ORDETAILS CONTACT$+0UBLISHING3PECIAL -ARKETS (UDSON3TREET .EW9ORK .9OR 3PECIAL3ALES DKCOM
US_001-005-Goals.indd 4 &&'#&&+#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ*
31/8/06 12:17:38 pm '(%*%&,'&0*)0(*Wc
S #LEARTHE"LOCKS
$EALWITH/VERLOAD
$EFEAT,IMITING"ELIEFS
,IVE5PTO9OUR3ELF )MAGE
$EALWITH0ROBLEMS $EALWITH/THER0EOPLE $EALWITH#RITICISM
#REATETHE6ISION 9OU7ANT 3ET9OUR'OALS
4AKE#AREOF9OURSELF ,EARNFROM9OUR-ISTAKES "EYOND9OUR'OALS )NDEX !CKNOWLEDGMENTS
-AKE'OAL 3ETTING7ORK &INDA2OUTETO3UCCESSFUL 'OALS 0LACETHE'OAL)N9OUR &UTURE
'ETTING4HERE -AKE9OUR'OALS(APPEN &OCUSON9OUR$ESIRED /UTCOME 0LAYTO9OUR3TRENGTHS
5_ED245_US 5 &&'#&&+#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ+
31/7/06 4:51:38 pm '(%*%&,'&0*)0)+Wc
)NTRODUCTION (OWWOULDYOULIKEYOURLIFETOBEDIFFERENT7HETHER ITSCHOOSINGANEWCAREERPATH lNDINGYOURSOULMATE ORGETTINGYOURlNANCESINORDER MOSTPEOPLEHAVE SOMETHINGABOUTTHEIRLIFETHATTHEYWANTTOCHANGE
4HEFACTTHATYOUAREREADINGTHISMEANSTHATYOUARE CONSIDERINGMAKINGCHANGES,IKEMOSTPEOPLE YOUWILLHAVE TRIEDTOMAKECHANGESINYOURLIFEBEFORE9OUPROBABLYFOUND THATSOMEWEREEASIERTHAN
#HANGEWILLHAPPENWHEN YOUAREREADYANDABLETO TAKETHENECESSARYSTEPS
OTHERS ANDTHATSOME CHANGESLASTEDWHILEOTHERS DIDNOT7HATWASTHE DIFFERENCEBETWEENTHEM
!LMOSTANYCHANGEISPOSSIBLEIFYOUPUTALLTHEFACTORSIN PLACETOHELPYOU&IRST MAKESURETHATYOUACCEPTYOURSELF 0EOPLESOMETIMESAVOIDTAKINGAREALISTICLOOKATWHERETHEIR LIVESARENOWBECAUSETHEYAREWORRIEDABOUTWHATTHEYWILL lND ANDHOWTHEYWILLFEELABOUTTHEMSELVESASARESULT 3TARTINGWITHANATTITUDEOFACCEPTANCESOLVESTHISPROBLEM 9OUCANASSESSYOURCURRENTWAYOFBEINGOBJECTIVELY WITHOUT JUDGINGYOURSELF3ECOND MAKESURETHATYOUARECLEARABOUT WHATYOUWANT9OUCANUSETHEMETHODSIN!CHIEVE9OUR 'OALSTOCLARIFYYOURVISIONOFWHEREYOUWANTTOBE ANDTO
!#( ) % 6 % 9/ 5 2' /! , 3
6_ED245_US 6 &&,U&&-#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ,
31/7/06 4:51:41 pm '(%*%&,'&0)-0*(Wc
RESOLVEANYDOUBTSANDUNCERTAINTIESSOTHATYOUCANBESURE THATTHISISWHATYOUREALLYWANT&INALLY USEBRAIN FRIENDLY METHODSTOACHIEVEYOURGOAL9OURMINDISANAMAZINGLY POWERFULANDCOMPLEXMECHANISM)TWILLRESPONDWELLTO SOMEAPPROACHESANDWILLRESISTSOMEOTHERSWITHALLITSMIGHT 4HISBOOKSHOWSYOUTHEBESTWAYSTOMAKEYOURGOALS COMPELLINGANDKEEPYOURMINDMOTIVATED)TWILLWORKBESTIF YOUSTARTWITHTHESELF ASSESSMENTONTHEFOLLOWINGPAGESAND WORKTHROUGHTHEBOOKFROMSTARTTOlNISH)FPOSSIBLE TEAM UPWITHAGOAL SETTINGPARTNER SOTHATYOUCANSUPPORTEACH OTHERALONGTHEWAY4HISHELPSBECAUSEYOUCANOFTENGAIN ADDITIONALINSIGHTSFROMYOURPARTNERASYOUTALKTHROUGHTHE EXERCISESTOGETHER ANDALSOBECAUSEWHENYOUTELLANOTHER PERSONABOUTYOURGOALS THOSEGOALSBECOMEMOREREALAND YOUAREMORELIKELYTOCARRY THEMOUT)FYOUCANTlNDA GOAL SETTINGPARTNERRIGHT AWAY DOINGTHEEXERCISESBY YOURSELFWILLSTILLWORKBUT YOUMUSTDOTHEM NOTJUST THINKTHEMTHROUGH INORDER FORTHEMTOBETRULYEFFECTIVE
7_ED245_US 7 &&,U&&-#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ-
).42/$5#4)/.
31/7/06 4:51:42 pm '(%*%&,'&0)-0+(Wc
!SSESSING9OUR3KILLS 4HESEQUESTIONSAREDESIGNEDTOGETYOUTHINKINGABOUT GOAL SETTINGANDMAYLEADTONEWINSIGHTS WHETHERYOUARE ANEXPERIENCEDGOALACHIEVERORJUSTSTARTINGOUT4OGETTHE FULLBENElT COMPLETETHEASSESSMENTTWICEONCEBEFORE YOUREADTHEBOOKANDAGAINAFTERYOUHAVEREADITAND CRUCIALLY DONETHEPRACTICALEXERCISES4HEMOREHONESTYOU AREWITHYOURSELF THEGREATERTHEBENElTSYOUWILLENJOY "EFORE !FTER
7HENYOUTHINKABOUTTHEPROBLEMSTHAT YOUFACENOW WHATISYOURlRSTINSTINCT
7HENTHINGSDONTWORKOUTTHEWAYYOU WANTTHEMTO WHATISYOURRESPONSE
7HATKINDOFINTERNALDIALOGUESDOYOUHAVE
(OWDOYOUFEELABOUTYOURCURRENTJOB
!)BLAMEOTHERS ")BLAMEMYSELF #)ACCEPTRESPONSIBILITY ANDTHINKABOUTWHAT) CANDOTOCHANGETHINGS
!)FEELTHAT)HAVEFAILED ")REDOUBLEMYEFFORTS #)ASKMYSELFWHAT)NEEDTOLEARNFROMTHISRESULT
!4HEYARECRITICAL "4HEYARESUPPORTIVEANDENCOURAGING #)DONTHAVEINTERNALDIALOGUESMYhINNERVOICEv ISSILENTMOSTOFTHETIME
!)DONTDOANYMORETHAN)HAVETO ")TDOESNTREALLYSUITME BUT)WORKHARDASA MATTEROFPRIDE #-YWORKISTAKINGMECLOSERTOFULlLLINGMYLIFES PURPOSE
!#( ) % 6 % 9/ 5 2' /! , 3
8_ED245_US 8 &&.U&''#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ.
31/7/06 4:51:45 pm '(%*%&,''0)'0)-Wc
"EFORE !FTER
7HICHOFTHESESTATEMENTSISCLOSEST TOYOURPHILOSOPHYOFLIFE
7HYISITIMPORTANTTOYOUTOACHIEVE YOURGOALS
(OWDOYOUFEELABOUTYOURSTRENGTHS
7HATISYOURATTITUDETOTHEFUTURE
(OWCLEARLYDElNEDAREYOURGOALS
!9OUREEITHERLUCKYORUNLUCKY "0EOPLEMAKETHEIROWNLUCK #%VERYTHINGTHATHAPPENSISANOPPORTUNITY TOLEARN
!)HAVENTREALLYTHOUGHTABOUTIT ""ECAUSE)DONTWANTTOSTAYWHERE)AMNOW #4OINCREASETHEPOSSIBILITIESOPENTOME
!)MNOTREALLYSUREWHATTHEYARE "4HEYREBETTERTHANMOSTPEOPLES BUTTHEYRE NEVERGOODENOUGH #)KNOWMYSTRENGTHSANDAMALWAYSREADY TOIMPROVETHEM
!)TRYTOLIVEINTHEMOMENT "-YFUTUREISPLANNEDOUTFORTHENEXT lVEYEARS #)KNOWWHERE)MGOINGAND)HAVEMANY POSSIBLEROUTESTOGETTHERE
!.OTVERYTHEYREJUSTDAYDREAMS ")TSALLWRITTENDOWNAND)WILLGETTHEREIFIT KILLSME #4HEYARECLEARANDVIVID AND)UPDATETHEMIN THELIGHTOFNEWINFORMATION
(OWDOYOUKNOWWHENYOUREDOING AGOODJOB !/THERPEOPLETELLME ")JUSTKNOW #7HENMYFEELINGABOUTITISCONlRMEDBY FEEDBACKFROMOTHERPEOPLEANDOBJECTIVE EVIDENCE
9_ED245_US 9 &&.U&''#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ/
! 3 3 % 3 3 ) . '9/ 5 23 + ) , , 3
31/7/06 4:51:46 pm '(%*%&,''0)'0*.Wc
"EFORE !FTER
7HATWOULDHAPPENIFYOUDIDNT ACHIEVEYOURGOALS !,IFEWOULDGOONTHESAMEASUSUAL ")HAVETOACHIEVEMYGOALS #)EXPECTTOACHIEVETHEM BUTWHATEVER HAPPENS )WILLLEARNSOMETHINGVALUABLE FROMIT
(OWCLEARAREYOUABOUTWHATIS IMPORTANTTOYOU
(OWDOYOUMAINTAINYOURWORKLIFE BALANCE
$OYOUDESERVETOBESUCCESSFUL
!)MABITVAGUE ")MVERYCLEARIF)WASNT ANYTHINGCOULD HAPPEN #)AMCLEARABOUTWHATSIMPORTANT EVENIFITIS SOMETIMESFULlLLEDINUNEXPECTEDWAYS
!)TSNOTAPROBLEM)DOENOUGHTOGETBY ANDTHENSTOP ")TALLGOESBYTHEBOARDWHENTHERESA DEADLINE #)AMREALISTICABOUTWHAT)CANDO ANDMAKE SURETHEIMPORTANTTHINGSGETDONElRST
!.OTESPECIALLY NOMORETHANANYONEELSE "9ESBECAUSE)WORKHARDFORIT #9ESLIKEEVERYONEELSE )lNDITEASIERTOBE ATMYBESTWHEN)AMHAPPYANDFULlLLED
&INAL3CORES !
"
#
"EFORE
!FTER
!#( ) % 6 % 9/ 5 2' /! , 3
10_ED245_US 10 &&.U&''#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ'&
31/7/06 4:51:47 pm '(%*%&,''0)'0+-Wc
11_ED245_US 11 ''U;:(*+U9COAU''
!NALYSIS -OSTLY!S
4HESEANSWERSSUGGESTYOUFEELTHATTHELOCUSOFCONTROLISOUTSIDEOF YOU ANDTHATWHATEVERYOUTRYWILLPROBABLYNOTSUCCEED7HATEVER YOUWOULDLIKETOHAPPENINYOURFUTURE ITISLIKELYTOREMAINA DAYDREAMUNLESSYOUTAKESOMEACTION4OCHANGETHINGS FOLLOWTHE STEPSINTHEBOOKANDDOTHEEXERCISESDONTJUSTREADTHEM 3TARTING WITHSMALL ACHIEVABLESTEPS BUILDUPSOMEREFERENCEEXPERIENCESOF SUCCESSFULGOALATTAINMENT
-OSTLY"S 9OUAREHIGHLYMOTIVATED ABITOFAPERFECTIONIST ANDYOUROWN HARSHESTCRITIC9OUDONTLIKETOBEBEATENANDWILLFORCEYOURSELFTO OVERCOMECHALLENGESAGAINSTTHEODDS9OUMAYlND HOWEVER THAT ACHIEVINGYOURGOALSSOMETIMESTURNSOUTTOBELESSSATISFYINGTHAN YOUENVISAGED'IVESOMEATTENTIONTOCLARIFYINGWHATISIMPORTANTTO YOU ANDMAKESUREYOUTAKEACCOUNTOFHOWYOURGOALSIMPACTON YOURHEALTH RELATIONSHIPS ANDGENERALHAPPINESS
-OSTLY#S 9OUDEMONSTRATEAMATUREAPPROACHTOGOALACHIEVEMENTYOUTAKE RESPONSIBILITYFORYOUROWNACTIONS YOUARECLEARABOUTWHATYOUWANT ANDYOUTHINKABOUTTHEEFFECTSONYOURLIFEANDRELATIONSHIPS-AKE SUREYOUDONOTBECOMEOVER ANALYTICALABOUTYOURGOALS ASTHISCAN LEADTOALACKOFMOTIVATION4ORECHARGEYOURDRIVE TAKECARETOSTAY CONNECTEDWITHWHATISIMPORTANTTOYOU ANDTRYOUTNEWEXPERIENCES FROMTIMETOTIME
#ONCLUSION )FTHISISTHElRSTTIMEYOUHAVEDONETHISSELF ASSESSMENT THENBEARIN MINDTHISANALYSISASYOUREADTHEBOOK0AYSPECIALATTENTIONTOTHE AREASHIGHLIGHTEDBYYOURRESPONSES ASWELLASTHETIPSANDTECHNIQUES THESEWILLHELPYOUTOREDUCETHENUMBEROF!RESPONSESNEXTTIME AROUNDANDACHIEVEAMOREBALANCEDMIXTUREOF"SAND#S!FTERYOU HAVECOMPLETEDTHEBOOKANDPUTTHETECHNIQUESINTOPRACTICE RETAKE THEASSESSMENT'IVINGHONESTANSWERSWILLENABLEYOUTOGETADIRECT MEASUREOFYOURPROGRESSANDYOUSHOULDSEEABIGIMPROVEMENT
! 3 3 % 3 3 ) . '9/ 5 23 + ) , , 3
9/8/06 5:47:57 pm ''%*%&,,0),0*)fc
)TS5P TO9OU
4OREACHYOURDESTINATION YOUNEEDTOKNOW WHEREYOUARESTARTINGFROM9OUCANGET CLUESABOUTWHEREYOUWANTTOBEFROM YOURLIFENOW ANDHOWYOUARRIVEDAT THISPOINT9OURBELIEFSARESELF FULlLLING PROPHECIES SOFOCUSINGONWHATYOUWANT ANDWHATISALREADYWORKINGHELPSYOUREACH YOURREMAININGGOALS4HISSECTIONSHOWSYOU s7HYITSVITALTOTAKERESPONSIBILITYFORWHERE YOUARENOW s(OWTOUSETHE#AUSEAND%FFECTEQUATION s(OWTODEVELOPYOURPERSONALPOWER s4HEPOWEROFYOURUNCONSCIOUSMINDTO HELPYOUTOACHIEVEWHATYOUWANT s(OWTODEVELOPYOURSELF AWARENESSAND ASSESSWHEREYOURLIFEISNOW
12_ED245_US 12 '(U;:(*+U9COAU'(
31/7/06 4:51:55 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0&/fc
13_ED245_US 13 %$ 'OALSINDD
31/7/06 4:51:56 pm
4AKE2ESPONSIBILITY 4HElRSTSTEPINCHANGINGYOURLIFEISTOACCEPT RESPONSIBILITYFORWHEREYOUARENOW2ECOGNIZETHAT YOUARETHEONLYPERSONWHOCANCHANGEYOURLIFE NOONEELSECANDOITFORYOU
-AKETHE2IGHT#HOICES 4OTAKERESPONSIBILITYISSIMPLYTORECOGNIZETHATYOUHAVE THEABILITYTORESPONDTOEVENTSASTHEYHAPPEN9OU CANNOTCONTROLWHATLIFETHROWSATYOU7HATYOUCAN CONTROLISTHECHOICESYOUMAKEIN RESPONSE4HISALSOMEANSTHATYOU 4OGETRESULTS HAVEARESPONSIBILITYTOMAKETHE BESTCHOICESYOUCAN ANDTOKEEP ACTIONIS LEARNINGSOTHATYOUEXPANDTHE NECESSARY AS RANGEOFCHOICESAVAILABLETOYOU WELLASGOOD 4HEMOREABILITIESYOUHAVE THE EASIERITISTOMAKETHERIGHTCHOICE INTENTIONS INANYGIVENSITUATION$OESTHAT MEANYOUHAVETODOITALLYOURSELF WITHOUTANYOUTSIDEASSISTANCE.OTHEREARESOME GOALSYOUCANONLYACHIEVETHROUGHWORKINGWITHOTHERS 9OUCANTMAKEOTHERPEOPLEHELPYOUBUTYOUCAN INmUENCEANDINSPIRETHEMTOWANTTOHELPYOUIN ACHIEVINGYOURGOALS
$ONT3ELF BLAME 4AKINGRESPONSIBILITYISNOTTHESAMEASBLAMINGYOURSELF OROTHERPEOPLE FORANYTHINGTHATHASGONEWRONGUPTO NOW%VERYONEINCLUDINGYOU MAKESTHEBESTCHOICESTHEY CANACCORDINGTOHOWTHEYPERCEIVETHEWORLDATTHETIME )TMAKESNOSENSETOFEELGUILTYABOUTTHINGSYOUHAVE DONEINTHEPAST BECAUSEATTHATTIMEYOUWEREDOINGTHE BESTTHATYOUCOULD
i
(APPINESSDEPENDSUPONOURSELVES
14_ED245_US 14 '*U;:(*+U9COAU'*
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
w !RISTOTLE
31/7/06 4:51:57 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0'+fc
w
4HINK&EEDBACK NOT&AILURE 7HENYOUDONTIMMEDIATELYGETTHERESULTYOUWANTED YOUHAVEACHOICEABOUTHOWYOUVIEWTHATRESULT/NE WAYOFLOOKINGATTHINGSISLIKELYTOBRINGUSMOREBAD RESULTSTHEOTHER HOWEVER GIVESUSACHANCETOLEARNFROM MISTAKESSOWEDONTREPEATTHEM7ECANJUDGERESULTS WEDONTLIKEEITHERAShFAILUREvORAShFEEDBACKv INFORMATIONTHATALLOWSUSTOCORRECTOURCOURSE7HICH ONEWILLYOUCHOOSE
,EARNTO*UDGE9OUR2ESULTS )FYOUBECOMEACCUSTOMEDTOTHINKINGOFYOURSELFASA FAILURE YOUARESETTINGUPAVICIOUSCIRCLETHATCANBEHARD TOBREAK)F HOWEVER YOUTAKEALLYOURRESULTSPOSITIVEOR NEGATIVEASFEEDBACK YOUARESETTINGUPAPROGRESSIVE CHAINOFEVENTSONEYOUCANLEARNFROM
"REAKTHE#IRCLEOF &AILURE 4HATS FEEDBACK
&AILURE
%VERYTHING) TRYINTHEFUTURE WILLFAIL
4HATFAILED
7HATDO)NEED TOLEARN
)MAFAILURE 7HATWILL)DO DIFFERENTLY
5SE&AILUREFOR0OSITIVE2ESULTS!VOIDFALLINGINTOA VICIOUSCIRCLEOFFAILUREBYANALYZINGWHYYOUFAILEDINA PARTICULARSITUATION ANDDETERMININGTOCHANGETHEWAY YOUACTINASIMILARSITUATIONINTHEFUTURE)FYOUTREAT EVERYFAILUREASAPOSITIVELEARNINGEXPERIENCE YOUARE SETTINGYOURSELFUPTOSUCCEEDNEXTTIME
15_ED245_US 15 '+U;:(*+U9COAU'+
-YRESULTSWILL IMPROVE
4! + %2 % 3 0 / . 3 ) " ) , ) 4 9
31/7/06 4:51:58 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0'-fc
-AKE9OUR'OOD&ORTUNE $OYOUFEELASTHOUGHYOUAREATTHEMERCYOFEVENTS AND THATYOURCHANCESFORSUCCESSAREDETERMINEDBYYOURPAST HISTORY YOURCIRCUMSTANCES ANDWHATOTHERPEOPLEWILL ALLOWYOUTODO/RDOYOUBELIEVETHATYOUARETHEAUTHOR OFYOUROWNDESTINY THATYOUMAKEYOUROWNLUCK AND THATYOUCANMAKEADIFFERENCEINYOURLIFE-OSTOFUS WOULDPUTOURSELVESSOMEWHEREINBETWEEN4HEMOREYOU FEELYOURSELFSYMPATHIZINGWITHTHESECONDVIEWPOINT THE MORELIKELYYOUARETOACHIEVEYOURGOALS
#AUSEAND%FFECT -ANYPEOPLEPUTTHEMSELVESATTHE%FFECTENDOFTHE SPECTRUM4HEYFEELTHATTHEIREMOTIONSJUSTHAPPENTO THEM ORARECAUSEDBYOTHERPEOPLE9OUCANHEARCLUESTO THEWAYPEOPLETHINKINTHEWORDSTHEYCHOOSETOEXPRESS THEMSELVES s 3HEUPSETME s (EMADEMEANGRY s 4HISGRIDLOCKEDTRAFlCISREALLYGETTINGTOME "YTHINKINGTHISWAY THEYAREHANDINGPOWEROVERHOW THEYFEELTOOTHERPEOPLEOREVENTOINANIMATEOBJECTS RATHERTHANTAKINGCHARGEOFTHEIRFEELINGSANDUSINGTHEM TOPOSITIVEEFFECT4HEYARESAYINGTHATHOWTHEYFEEL AND EVENWHATTHEYDO ISBEYONDTHEIRCONTROL)STHISHOWYOU WANTTOBE0UTYOURSELFAT#AUSEINSTEAD
#HANGE9OUR0OSITION
16_ED245_US 16 ',U;:(*+U9COAU',
#!53%
%&&%#4
9/5
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
31/7/06 4:51:59 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0'/fc
)DENTIFY#AUSEAND%FFECT #!53%
%&&%#4
!SKSh(OW7HATv (ASAPRESENTFUTUREFOCUS ,EARNSFROMPROBLEMS
!SKSh7HYv (ASAFOCUSONTHEPAST &EELSBADABOUTPROBLEMS
&OCUSONTHE0RESENT 7HENYOUDECIDETOPLACEYOURSELFATTHE#AUSEENDOFTHE SPECTRUM THINGSCHANGE9OUAREMORELIKELYTOBELIEVEIN THEPRINCIPLETHATANYPROBLEMCANBESOLVED ANDYOU FOCUSMOREONWHATYOUWANTTHANONWHATYOUDONT 7HENPROBLEMSARISE RATHERTHANASKINGh7HYISTHIS HAPPENINGTOMEvAQUESTIONFOCUSINGATTENTIONONTHE PAST YOUASKTHINGSLIKE s %XACTLYWHATISGOINGONHERE s 7HATCAN)DOTOCHANGEIT s 7HATISITTHAT)WANTTOHAPPENINSTEAD 4HESEQUESTIONSPLACEYOUR ATTENTIONONTHEPRESENT 4AKE$ECISIVE!CTION,IFEOFTENCALLS ANDTHEFUTUREAMORE ONYOUTOACTDECISIVELY!MEDICAL USEFULFOCUSTHANTHEPASTIF TEAM FOREXAMPLE MUSTCONSTANTLY MAKEKEYDECISIONSONPATIENTCARE YOUWANTTOCHANGE
17_ED245_US 17 '-U;:(*+U9COAU'-
31/7/06 4:52:00 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0(*fc
$EVELOP9OUR0ERSONAL0OWER 9OURPERSONALPOWERISYOURABILITYTOMAKECHOICESFOR YOURSELF7HENTHEPOWERISSTRONG LIFEBECOMESMUCH EASIER9OUHAVETHEDElNITESENSETHATYOUAREIN CHARGE ANDTHATTHECHOICESAREYOURSTOMAKE
%NJOYTHE"ENElT 7ITHAHEALTHILYDEVELOPEDSENSEOFPERSONALPOWER YOU WILLlNDYOUCANMANAGEYOUREMOTIONS SOYOUDONTDO THINGSINTHEHEATOFTHEMOMENTTHATYOULATERREGRET9OU DOTHINGSBECAUSEYOUWANTTO NOTJUSTTOPLEASEOTHER PEOPLE9OUACTMORECOMPASSIONATELY BECAUSEYOUARE NOTFEELINGSORRYFORYOURSELF9OURMINDISCALMANDCLEAR YETALERT7HATEVERCHALLENGESYOUFACE YOUAREABLETO RESPONDAPPROPRIATELY/THERPEOPLEAREATTRACTEDTOYOU BECAUSEYOUARECOMFORTABLEWITHYOURSELF
5SE9OUR0OWERTO!CT 3OMEPEOPLElNDTHEMSELVESUNCOMFORTABLEWITHTHEIDEA OFhPERSONALPOWER vBECAUSEFORTHEMITHASCONNOTATIONS OFDOMINANCEOVEROTHERPEOPLE OFORDERINGTHEM AROUNDANDTELLINGTHEMWHATTODO4HISIS HOWEVER A MISCONCEPTIONOFWHATISMEANTBYTHETERM0ERSONAL POWERISABOUTINCREASINGYOURINNER PERSONALSTRENGTH YOURRELIANCEONYOURSELF ANDYOURABILITYTOACHIEVEYOUR GOALS9OUWILLlNDTHATASYOUBUILDUPREFERENCE EXPERIENCESOFACHIEVINGYOURGOALS STARTINGSMALLATlRST ANDGRADUALLYINCREASINGYOURLEVELOFCHALLENGEASYOU GAINCONlDENCE YOURhSELF EFlCACYvASPSYCHOLOGISTSCALL YOURSENSEOFPERSONALPOWER WILLGROW TOO/NCEYOU HAVEIT ITISUPTOYOUTOUSETHATPOWERWISELY)FYOUARE THESORTOFPERSONWHOTENDSTOFEELMARTYREDORPUTUPON BYOTHERPEOPLE YOUWILL lNDTHATFEELINGGRADUALLY !FlRMTHEPOSITIVE DIMINISHING ANDYOURSENSE VISUALIZETHEPOSITIVE AND OFEFFECTIVENESSGROWING AS EXPECTTHEPOSITIVE YOUSTARTTOINCREASEYOUR 2EMEZ3ASSON PERSONALPOWER
i
18_ED245_US 18 '.U;:(*+U9COAU'.
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
w
31/7/06 4:52:02 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0(+fc
"ECOMING#ALM 4HISISAWAYOFCALMINGYOURMINDANDBODYFAST7HEN STRESSFULSITUATIONSARESPRUNGONYOU YOUDONTUSUALLY HAVETIMETODOHALFANHOUROFYOGA9OUCANUSETHIS EXERCISEANYTIME ANYWHERE
0LACEYOURATTENTIONONAPOINT STRAIGHTINFRONTOFYOUANDSLIGHTLY !STHEEYES ABOVEYOUREYELEVEL,OOKATITWITH RELAX MUSCLE hSOFTEYES vWITHOUTSTRAININGTO TENSION FOCUS ANDBLINKWHENEVERYOUWANT LEAVESTHE 3TILLLOOKINGSTRAIGHTAHEAD ALLOW BODY YOURlELDOFVISIONTOGRADUALLY BROADENOUTASYOUNOTICEMOREAND MOREOFWHATISONEITHERSIDEOFTHAT POINTUNTILYOUAREPAYINGATTENTIONTOWHATYOUCANSEEOUT OFTHECORNERSOFYOUREYESONBOTHSIDESATONCE . OWLETYOURAWARENESSSPREADOUTEVENFARTHER5SEYOUR SENSESOFHEARINGANDSPATIALAWARENESSTOGETAFEELINGOF WHATISBEHINDYOUASWELL 2ELAXINTOTHISALL AROUNDAWARENESSANDNOTICEWHATHAPPENS 3TAYTHEREFORASLONGASYOUCAN 7HATDIDYOUNOTICE-OSTPEOPLEREPORTAFEELINGOFINCREASING RELAXATIONTHEYNOTICETHATTHEIRBREATHINGHASSLOWEDDOWN AND THATANYINTERNALDIALOGUEORDEBATEPLAYINGINTHEIRHEADHAS SLOWEDDOWNOREVENSTOPPEDALTOGETHER5SINGYOURPERIPHERAL VISIONASANAIDTOCALMLIKETHISNEEDNOTBEANINTENSIVEEXERCISE )FYOUAREGIVINGAPRESENTATION FOREXAMPLE GOINGALITTLEWAY INTOPERIPHERALVISIONWILLHELPTOCALMANYNERVOUSBUTTERmIESYOU HAVE ANDWILLALSOENABLEYOUTOSEENONVERBALRESPONSESACROSS THEWHOLEAUDIENCE RATHERTHANCONCENTRATINGTOOHARDON INDIVIDUALSATTHECOSTOFANOVERVIEW4ORESTYOUREYESANDRETURN REFRESHEDAFTERTHEPERIPHERALVISIONEXERCISE RUBYOURHANDS TOGETHERVIGOROUSLYTOWARMTHEM ANDTHENPLACEYOURPALMS OVERYOURCLOSEDEYESFORAFEWSECONDS
19_ED245_US 19 '/U;:(*+U9COAU'/
$ % 6 % ,/ 09/ 5 20 % 2 3 / . ! ,0 / 7 % 2
31/7/06 4:52:03 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0(-fc
#ENTER9OURSELF !NOTHERWAYOFINCREASINGYOURPERSONALPOWERWAS INSPIREDORIGINALLYBYTHEMARTIALARTS)TSAWAYOF INCREASINGYOURhPRESENCE vASWELLASAWAYOFSTAYING CALMANDCENTEREDNOMATTERWHATHAPPENSAROUNDYOU -ARTIALARTSPRACTITIONERSDISCOVEREDLONGAGOTHATWHERE YOUFOCUSYOURATTENTIONINYOURBODYHASAHUGEEFFECT ONHOWCALMYOUARE HOWCOMFORTABLEYOUAREWITHIN YOURSELF ANDEVENHOWPHYSICALLYSTRONGYOUARE-OST PRACTITIONERSATTRIBUTEGREATPOWERTOTHISABILITYSOMEGO SOFARASTOSAYTHATWHENYOUARETRULYCENTERED ITIS IMPOSSIBLETOFEELFEARTHOUGHTHISTAKESALOTOFPRACTICE
)NCREASE9OUR!WARENESS 7HILEYOUAREOUTWALKING PRACTICEPAYINGATTENTIONTO YOURCENTRALPOINTANDMAINTAININGYOURPERIPHERALVISION !LTHOUGHITMIGHTNOTBEWHATYOUEXPECT ASYOUFOCUS ONYOURCENTRALPOINT YOUWILLlNDTHATYOUALSOBECOME CONSIDERABLYMOREAWAREOFYOURSURROUNDINGS-ANYSELF DEFENSECOURSESTEACHTHEDEVELOPMENTOFTHISALL AROUND AWARENESSASAMEANSOFINCREASINGYOURPERSONALSAFETY
20_ED245_US 20 (&U;:(*+U9COAU(&
t
4%#(.)15%3 TOPRACTICE
5SETHISEXERCISETOLOCATE THECONNECTIONBETWEENYOUR YOURhCENTERvAND FEETANDTHEmOOR CONCENTRATEONYOURFOCUS 0AYATTENTIONTOAPOINTTHATIS )TCANBEPRACTICEDINANYQUIET ANINCHORTWOBELOWYOUR PLACEWHEREYOUCANCONCENTRATE NAVEL ANDINTHECENTEROF 3TANDWITHYOURFEETSHOULDER YOURBODY HALFWAYBETWEEN WIDTHAPART WITHYOURWEIGHT FRONTANDBACK,OCATETHE EVENLYBALANCEDANDYOURBODY POINTMENTALLYANDFOCUSONIT RELAXED COMPLETELY ,ETYOURKNEESBENDSLIGHTLY ,OOKSTRAIGHTAHEADANDGO ANDCONCENTRATEYOURFOCUSON INTOPERIPHERALVISION
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
9/8/06 5:12:08 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0(/fc
4EST(OW#ENTERED9OU!RE )TISEASYBOTHTOTESTHOWCENTEREDYOUARE ANDTOCENTER YOURSELFMORESTRONGLY!SKAFRIENDTOPUSHYOURCHESTTO TRYTOMAKEYOUTAKEASTEPBACKWARD4RYTHISTWICE THE lRSTTIMEFOCUSINGONTHETOPOFYOURLEFTEAR ANDTHE SECONDTIMECENTERED9OULLNOTICEADRAMATICDIFFERENCE
3TRENGTH9OUMAYFEEL THATWHETHERORNOT SOMEONECANPUSHYOU OFFBALANCEISSOLELYA QUESTIONOFPHYSICAL STRENGTH#HANGEYOUR FOCUS ANDYOUWILLlND THISISNOTTHECASE
&OCUS7HENYOU CONCENTRATEYOURENERGY INAPERIPHERALPARTOF YOURBODYYOURLEFTEAR YOUWILLlNDTHATYOUARE EASYTOPUSHOFFBALANCE EVENIFYOUARETRYING HARDTOSTAYUPRIGHT
#ENTER/NCEYOUHAVE CONCENTRATEDYOUR ENERGIESCENTRALLYINYOUR BODY YOUWILLlNDTHAT YOUAREHARDERTOPUSH BACKWARDEVENIFYOU ARECONSCIOUSLYRESISTING THEPUSHLESSHARD
4)0 )MAGINEPROJECTINGANhENERGYBUBBLEvFROM YOURCENTRALPOINT.OTICETHERESULTSYOUGET
21_ED245_US 21 ('U;:(*+U9COAU('
$ % 6 % ,/ 09/ 5 20 % 2 3 / . ! ,0 / 7 % 2
31/7/06 4:52:05 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0)(fc
#LEAR9OUR)NNER#LUTTER )FYOUFEELASTHOUGHTHEREARETOOMANYTHINGS HAPPENINGATONCE ANDYOUDONTKNOWWHERETOSTART THISISASIGNTHATYOUNEEDTOCLEARSOMEMENTALSPACE /THERWISEYOUCOULDENDUPCONSTANTLYlRElGHTING
"E%FFECTIVE NOT"USY -ANYPEOPLETODAYBELIEVETHATTHEYhCANTRELAXv5SUALLY THISISBECAUSETHEYFEELTHEREISSOMETHINGTHATTHEYDONT WANTTOFACEUPTO SOTHEYTRYTODISTRACTTHEMSELVESBY KEEPINGCEASELESSLYBUSY4HEPROBLEMISTHATITDOESNT WORK/NTOPOFTHETIMEWASTEDONNONESSENTIALTASKS ANDYOUWILLALREADYHAVEDISCOVEREDTHATANYBITOFTRIVIA WILLDOIFYOURMAINPURPOSEISJUSTTOSTAYBUSY WHATTHEY ARETRYINGTOESCAPEFROMDOESNTGOAWAY)TISSTILL NAGGINGAWAYATTHEBACKOFTHEMIND DISTRACTINGTHEM FROMTHEVERYTASKSTHEYAREUSINGTODISTRACTTHEMSELVES 7HENYOUFACEUPTOTHINGS HOWEVER YOUWILLlNDTHAT THEYWILLALWAYSBEEASIERTODEALWITHTHANYOUFEARED
22_ED245_US 22 ((U;:(*+U9COAU((
t
4%#(.)15%3 TOPRACTICE
)THELPSTOCLEARYOURMIND !SYOUSTAYFOCUSEDONYOUR COMPLETELYBEFOREYOUMAKE BREATHING YOUWILLlNDYOU ASTARTONSOMETHINGNEW NOTICECERTAINSENSATIONSMORE 4HISISANEASYMIND CLEARING THANUSUAL.OTICEHOWTHEAIR EXERCISETHATCANBEPRACTICED YOUBREATHEINISCOOLERTHAN WHEREVERYOUHAPPENTOBE THEAIRYOUBREATHEOUT #LOSEYOUREYESANDFOCUSON %ACHTIMEYOUBREATHEIN LET YOURBREATHING9OUWILLlND YOURATTENTIONFOLLOWEACHIN THATINASHORTTIMEITSHIFTS BREATHDEEPERDOWNINSIDE INTOAMORERELAXEDPATTERN 7HENYOUAREREADYTOCOME BACK OPENYOUREYES4AKEA )FYOUHEARANYhMENTAL MOMENTORTWOTONOTICEHOW CHATTER vLETITHAPPEN,EFTTO REFRESHEDYOUFEEL ITSELF ITWILLCALMDOWN
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
9/8/06 5:12:09 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0)*fc
"UILDAN)NNER3ANCTUARY 7HEREISYOURFAVORITEPLACETORELAX%VERYONENEEDS SOMEWHERETHEYCANGOTORECHARGETHEIRBATTERIESAND RECOVERFROMTHEENERGYDRAINSOFMODERNLIFE 4HISEXERCISEISDESIGNEDTOHELPYOURECHARGEYOURENERGIESEVEN WHENYOUREFARAWAYFROMARELAXINGENVIRONMENT &INDACOMFORTABLEPLACEWHEREYOUCANCLOSEYOUREYES 2ELAX USINGTHEBREATHINGTECHNIQUEONTHEOPPOSITEPAGE )NYOURMINDSEYE lNDYOURFAVORITEPLACETORELAX)TCOULDBE AROOMINYOURHOUSE SOMEWHERETHATYOUVEBEENON VACATION AMEMORYFROMLONGAGO OREVENANIMAGINARY PLACE4HISISSOMEWHEREJUSTFORYOU WHEREYOUCANRECHARGE .OTICEWHATYOUCANSEEANDBEAWAREOFTHECOLORS ,ISTENTOTHEPEACEFUL RELAXINGSOUNDS .OTICEHOWPEACEFULITFEELS ASYOUBEGINTOABSORBTHEPEACE ANDTRANQUILLITYWITHINYOURSELF 3TAYFORASLONGASFEELSRIGHT THENRETURNREFRESHED &IND4RANQUILLITY7HENYOUHAVEFOUNDYOURIDEALINTERNALREFUGE YOUCANTAKE THETIMETOPERFECTITUNTILITMEETSALLYOURCRITERIAFORRECHARGINGYOURENERGIES
23_ED245_US 23 ()U;:(*+U9COAU()
10/8/06 10:12:40 am '(%*%&,(0(*0).fc
4HE0OWEROF9OUR5NCONSCIOUS 4HEOLD FASHIONED&REUDIANIDEAOFTHEUNCONSCIOUS SOMETIMESCALLEDTHESUBCONSCIOUS MINDWASOFAKIND OFDUNGEONWHEREWELOCKUPALLTHEREPRESSEDDESIRES AGGRESSION LUST SELlSHNESS THATWECANTADMITTO
2ECOGNIZE9OUR5NCONSCIOUS )NFACT YOURUNCONSCIOUSMINDISJUSTTHOSEPARTSOFYOUR THOUGHTPROCESSESTHATHAPPENBELOWTHERADAROFYOUR CONSCIOUSAWARENESS7HENYOUARETALKINGTOSOMEONE WHOCHOOSESTHEWORDSANDTHE ORDERINWHICHTHEYCOMEOUT 7HENYOUPICKUPYOURPHONE 9OUR FROMTHETABLE WHOISCOORDINATING UNCONSCIOUS THEDOZENSOFMUSCLESINVOLVEDIN MINDIS THATMOVEMENT7HATKEEPSYOU WORKINGIN BREATHINGWHENYOUAREASLEEP .OTYOURCONSCIOUSMIND YOURFAVOR 9OURUNCONSCIOUSMINDISABLE TOMULTITASKINAWAYTHATISFAR BEYONDYOURCONSCIOUSABILITIES )TKEEPSTHEBILLIONSOFCELLSANDTHOUSANDSOFSYSTEMSIN YOURBODYWORKINGINMOREORLESS PERFECTHARMONY)T RUNSYOURIMMUNESYSTEM YOURDIGESTIVESYSTEM YOUR BREATHING YOURCIRCULATION ANDITPERFORMSPRODIGIOUS FEATSOFREAL TIMEPROCESSINGTHATTHEMOSTADVANCED COMPUTERSARENOWHERENEARMATCHING
,EARNTO5SE9OUR5NCONSCIOUS 9OURUNCONSCIOUSMINDISLIKEAFAITHFULSERVANT CARRYING OUTYOURWISHESWITHOUTTHENEEDFORCONSCIOUSEFFORTON YOURPART)TWANTSYOUTOSUCCEEDANDITTRIESTOACTINYOUR BESTINTERESTS)TLIKESTOBEGIVENTASKSTOCARRYOUT)FYOU DONTGIVEITANYINSTRUCTIONS ITWILLTAKETHEMFROMOUTSIDE INmUENCESUSUALLYDRAWINGFROMADVERTISING THEMEDIA ORPEERPRESSURE2IGHTNOWYOUCANCHOOSETOENLISTTHE HELPOFYOURUNCONSCIOUSMINDBYBEINGCLEARABOUTWHAT YOUWANTANDGIVINGITUNAMBIGUOUSINSTRUCTIONSTOFOLLOW
24_ED245_US 24 (*U;:(*+U9COAU(*
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
31/7/06 4:52:09 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0*&fc
4)0 4APYOURUNCONSCIOUSMINDSCREATIVITYBY
ASKINGITTOSOLVEAPROBLEMASYOUGOTOSLEEP9OU OFTENlNDTHATYOUHAVETHEANSWERWHENYOUWAKE
-ANAGE9OUR-IND 9OURCONSCIOUSMINDTHEhYOUvTHATMAKESDECISIONS OR YOURhWILLv ISLIKETHECAPTAINOFASHIP4HEUNCONSCIOUS MINDPLAYSTHEPARTOFTHECREW4HECREWMEMBERSALL KNOWWHATTHEIRJOBSARE ANDTHEYCANCARRYTHEMOUT WITHOUTHAVINGTOBETOLD3OWHATISTHEJOBOFTHE CAPTAIN4ODECIDEWHERETHESHIPISGOING-ANYPEOPLE THOUGH DONTUSETHEIRCONSCIOUSMINDFORITSINTENDED PURPOSE/NTHEIRhSHIP vTHECAPTAINISFOREVERWORRYING ABOUTWHETHERTHECREWAREDOINGTHEIRJOBS WHILE NEGLECTINGTOSETACOURSEFORTHESHIP&ORLONGSTRETCHES THEYAREBECALMED ORGOINGAROUNDINCIRCLES)NSTEAD YOU CANSELECTCONSCIOUSLYTHECOURSEYOUINTENDANDLETYOUR UNCONSCIOUSMINDGETONWITHTHEJOB
25_ED245_US 25 (+U;:(*+U9COAU(+
THINK
3-!24 9OURUNCONSCIOUSMINDDOESNOTUNDERSTANDTHEWORD hNOT vSOITSIMPORTANTTHATYOULEARNTOTALKTOYOUR UNCONSCIOUSINAWAYTHATITWILLUNDERSTAND 'ETMOREEFFECTIVERESULTS BOTHFROMYOURUNCONSCIOUSAND FROMOTHERPEOPLE BYTELLINGTHEMWHATYOUDOWANTTHEMTO DO RATHERTHANWHATYOUDONT)FAPARENTTELLSATODDLER h$ONTTOUCHTHATCANDY vTHETODDLERSUNCONSCIOUSMIND HEARShTOUCHTHATCANDYv3IMILARLY SUPPOSETHATYOUWANTTO GIVEUPSMOKINGIFYOUCONSTANTLYTELLYOURSELFh)MNOT GOINGTOSMOKE vYOUWILLBECONTINUALLYREMINDINGYOURSELFOF CIGARETTES ANDPROBABLYRESTIMULATINGYOURCRAVING.EGATION ISALOGICALCONCEPTBUTYOUCANTFORMANIMAGEOFIT SOFOCUS YOURUNCONSCIOUSONPOSITIVEBENElTS
4 ( %0 / 7 % 2/ &9/ 5 25 . #/ . 3 #) / 5 3
31/7/06 4:52:11 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0*(fc
7ORKWITH9OUR5NCONSCIOUS -ANYPEOPLETRYTOMAKECHANGESTHROUGHWILLPOWER ALONE WITHOUTlRSTGETTINGTHEAGREEMENTOFTHE UNCONSCIOUSMIND OREVENCONSIDERINGWHATITMIGHTBE TRYINGTOTELLTHEM4HISBEHAVIORWILLMAKECHANGEFEELLIKE ACHORE ANDITWILLUSUALLYFAILASSOONASTHEPERSONS CONSCIOUSATTENTIONISELSEWHERE THEUNCONSCIOUSMIND WILLGOSTRAIGHTBACKTOITSOLDHABITS3OMESELF HELPGURUS TREATTHEUNCONSCIOUSMINDASALAZYSERVANT TOBE PUNISHEDIFITGETSOUTOFLINE"UTWHATIFTHOSESUPPRESSED DOUBTSTURNOUTTOBEGENUINECONCERNSTHATWERE CONSCIOUSLYOVERLOOKED&ARBETTERTODISCOVERWHATYOU REALLYWANT ATBOTHTHECONSCIOUSANDTHEUNCONSCIOUS LEVELSOFYOURMIND SOYOUCANGETBEHINDYOURGOALSIN EVERYPOSSIBLEWAY ANDPURSUETHEMSINGLEMINDEDLY4HAT ISWHATTHEPROCESSESINTHISBOOKAREDESIGNEDTODO
26_ED245_US 26 (,U;:(*+U9COAU(,
&)8
MINUTE
)FYOUNEEDTOMAKE AQUICKDECISION BE SUREYOUAREHAPPY WITHTHEANSWERSTO THESEQUESTIONS BEFOREYOUACT L$O)REALLYWANTTO MAKETHISCHANGE L
)F)MAKETHISCHANGE
L
7HATISTHEPURPOSE
WHATWILL)MISS OFTHEBEHAVIOR)AM TRYINGTOCHANGE L
7HATWOULDBE
DIFFERENTIF)MADETHIS CHANGE
2ECOGNIZE9OUR&EELINGS 9OURUNCONSCIOUSMINDUSESYOUR FEELINGSTOCOMMUNICATEWITHYOU )FYOUHAVEEVERMADEABIG DECISIONDESPITEHAVINGSOME UNFOCUSEDMISGIVINGS BECAUSE RATIONALLY YOUCOULDNTlNDA REASONNOTTOGOAHEAD YOUMAY HAVEWISHEDLATERTHATYOUHAD PAIDMOREATTENTIONTOTHATSMALL DOUBT HOWEVERQUIETLYITWAS EXPRESSINGITSELF)FYOUDONTFEEL ENTHUSIASTICABOUTACOURSEOF ACTIONBUTDONTKNOWWHY ITMAY BEASIGNTHATYOURCONSCIOUSMIND HASMISSEDSOMETHING
5SE3ENSEAND)NSTINCT !DECISIONMADEBASEDONYOUR GUTFEELINGONLY THOUGH COULD TURNOUTASBADLYASONETHAT
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
31/7/06 4:52:12 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0**fc
#OMMON)NSTANCESOF3ELF SABOTAGE 3%,& 3!"/4!').'"%(!6)/2
2%35,43
4RYINGTOSTOPSMOKINGWHENPARTOFYOU DOESNTWANTTO 4RYINGTOLOSEWEIGHTWITHOUTADDRESSING THEUNDERLYINGISSUES 4RYINGTOBEASUCCESSINACAREERYOU DONTREALLYLIKE 7EARINGABUSINESSSUIT BUTWITH SLOPPYGROOMINGANDACCESSORIES
2ELAPSINGEARLY FAILINGIN YOURATTEMPT 2EPEATINGUNSUCCESSFUL YO YODIETING 0ERFORMINGPOORLYUNDER ACHIEVINGATWORK 0EOPLEDONTTAKEYOU SERIOUSLY
IGNORESYOURINSTINCTS4HEIDEALDECISIONSARETHOSEIN WHICHYOUARECONSCIOUSOFANEVENBALANCEBETWEEN EMOTIONANDREASONAGOODDECISIONWILLUSUALLYFEEL INSTINCTIVELYRIGHTANDALSOMAKERATIONALSENSE7HENANY MAJORDECISIONNEEDSTOBEMADE ASKYOURSELFIFYOUR PROPOSEDACTIONMEETSBOTH )NNER#ONlDENCE4HEULTIMATE OFTHESECRITERIA)FITDOES CONlDENCEDERIVESFROMTHECERTAINTY THENYOUSHOULDACTONIT THATADECISIONISRIGHTFORYOUONBOTH WITHCONlDENCE RATIONALANDEMOTIONALLEVELS
27_ED245_US 27 (-U;:(*+U9COAU(-
31/7/06 4:52:13 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0*,fc
5SE9OUR"ELIEFS0OSITIVELY 4HEBELIEFSYOUCHOOSEBECOMElLTERSTHROUGHWHICHYOU INTERPRETEVERYTHINGTHATHAPPENS%VIDENCETHATSUPPORTS YOURCHOSENBELIEFSWILLBEHIGHLIGHTED WHILEEVIDENCETHAT CONTRADICTSTHEMWILLBEPLAYEDDOWNORNOTEVENNOTICED (EREARETWOBELIEFSYOUMAYHAVECOMEACROSS h,IFESABITCHANDTHENYOUDIEv h,IFEISANADVENTURE PEOPLEAREBASICALLYGOOD AND )CANACHIEVEANYTHING)WANTv 7HICHONEISTRUE)FYOUTHINKABOUTIT YOUCANPROVIDE EVIDENCEFROMYOUROWNLIFETOSUPPORTEITHERONE3O BOTHORNEITHERARETRUE"ELIEFSARELIKEMAPSTHATHELP USlNDOURWAYAROUND4HEIMPORTANTQUESTIONABOUT THEMISNOTh!RETHEYTRUEvBUTh!RETHEYUSEFULv 7HICHBELIEFYOUCHOOSEBECOMESAlLTERTHROUGHWHICH YOUINTERPRETEVERYTHINGTHATHAPPENS%VIDENCETHAT SUPPORTSYOURCHOSENBELIEF 2EADTHE!PPROPRIATE-AP-APS WILLBEHIGHLIGHTED WHILE COMEINDIFFERENTGUISESTHINKABOUT EVIDENCETHATCONTRADICTSIT AWEATHERMAPAGAINSTAROADMAP WILLBEIGNORED PLAYED BOTHOFTHEMAREACCURATE BUTWHICHIS DOWN OREVENGOUNNOTICED THEMOREUSEFULFORYOURPURPOSES
28_ED245_US 28 (.U;:(*+U9COAU(.
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
31/7/06 4:52:14 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0+'fc
#ONSIDERTHE%VIDENCE 4HEhLIFESABITCHvBELIEVERWILLACTINAWAYTHATMAKES SENSETOTHEMINTHELIGHTOFTHATBELIEF WHICHWILLBEVERY DIFFERENTFROMHOWSOMEONEHOLDINGTHESECONDBELIEF ACTS4HERESULTSTHEYGETPOSITIVE ORNEGATIVEWILLTENDTOBEAROUT THEIRBELIEF4HELONGERANDMORE DEEPLYHELDTHEBELIEFIS THEMORE 9OURBELIEFS hEVIDENCEvITWILLACCUMULATEIN ARETHESCRIPT SUPPORTOFIT4HEREAREMANYWELL FORYOURLIFE KNOWNEXAMPLESOFRESEARCH STUDIESSUPPORTINGTHEIDEATHAT WHATYOUBELIEVEINmUENCESTHE REALOUTCOMEOFEVENTSINYOURLIFE 4HREEEFFECTSTHATAREOFTENCITEDARE s 4HEh0LACEBO%FFECT vINWHICHSOMEPATIENTSINTHE hCONTROLGROUPvINCLINICALDRUGTRIALSGETBETTER CONVINCEDTHATTHEYARERECEIVINGMEDICINE EVEN THOUGHTHEhTREATMENTvTHATTHEYTHINKTHEYARE RECEIVINGISJUSTASUGARPILL s 4HEh(ALO%FFECT vDISCOVEREDBY%DWARD4HORNDIKEIN THISESTABLISHEDTHATIFYOUSTRONGLYFAVORONE PARTICULARANDSPECIlCCHARACTERISTICTHATYOUlNDINA PERSON YOUAREMORELIKELYTORATETHESAMEPERSON HIGHERFORAVARIETYOFOTHERPOSITIVETRAITS WHETHEROR NOTYOUHAVEEVIDENCETOSUPPORTYOURRATING s 4HEh0YGMALION%FFECT vDESCRIBEDBY2OBERT2OSENTHAL INWHICHSHOWEDTHATHOWEFFECTIVELYAND SUCCESSFULLYCHILDRENPERFORMACADEMICALLYISSTRONGLY INmUENCEDBYTHEIRTEACHERSBELIEFSINTHEIRSKILLS 3INCEWHATYOUBELIEVETENDSTOBECOMETRUEFORYOU ITS IMPORTANTTOTHINKCAREFULLYABOUTWHATYOUBELIEVETO MAKESURETHATITSUPPORTSYOURSUCCESS
4)0 -AKEAPOSITIVEEFFORTTOLOOKFOREVIDENCE
THATDISPROVESANDDISEMPOWERSANYBELIEFSTHATARE WORKINGTOLIMITYOU
29_ED245_US 29 (/U;:(*+U9COAU(/
4 ( %0 / 7 % 2/ &9/ 5 25 . #/ . 3 #) / 5 3
31/7/06 4:52:15 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0+*fc
&OCUSON7HAT9OU7ANT (UMANBEINGSAREBORNWITHTHEABILITYTOSEEPATTERNS INTHINGS7HERETHEREARENOINNATEPATTERNS WETEND TOPROJECTTHEMLIKESEEINGPICTURESINACAMPlRE OR FACESANDANIMALSINCLOUDS
,EARNTO,OOK #ONSEQUENTLY ITISMUCHEASIERTONOTICESOMETHINGIFWE AREALREADYEXPECTINGTOSEEIT4HEIMPLICATIONOFTHISFOR CHANGINGYOURLIFEISTHATYOUGETWHATYOUFOCUSON)FYOU FOCUSONWHATYOUWANT YOUWILLlNDITIFALLYOUFOCUSON ISGETTINGAWAYFROMWHATYOUDONTWANT THATISWHAT YOUWILLlNDYOURSELFRETURNINGTOAGAINANDAGAIN
#HOOSETHE2IGHT-OTIVATION 4HEREARETWOKINDSOFMOTIVATIONTOWARDWHATYOU WANT ANDAWAYFROMWHATYOUDONTWANT7HILEhAWAY FROMvMOTIVATIONCANBEUSEFULINADMINISTERINGTHEKICK THATYOUNEEDEDTOGETSTARTED ITWILLGIVEYOUINCONSISTENT RESULTS4OHELPYOUKEEPGOINGUNTILYOUREACHYOURGOALS YOUNEEDTOENSURETHATYOURMOTIVATIONISMAINLYFOCUSED ONhTOWARDv
30_ED245_US 30 )&U;:(*+U9COAU)&
)DENTIFY9OUR-OTIVATION h4/7!2$v-/4)6!4)/.
h!7!9 &2/-v-/4)6!4)/.
(ASBUILT INDIRECTIONYOUKNOW WHEREYOUAREGOING ANDCANMAKE CORRECTIONSIFNECESSARY 7ORKSINASUSTAINEDWAYYOUWILL lNDTHATITEXERTSANEVENSTRONGER PULLASYOUCOMECLOSERTOYOURGOAL ANDWILLHELPTOINSPIREYOU
,ACKSDIRECTIONWHENYOUWANTTO GETAWAYFROMSOMETHING ANY DIRECTIONWILLDO 7ORKSONLYFORASHORTTIMEITGIVES OUTASSOONASYOUGETFARENOUGH AWAYFROMWHATYOUAREAVOIDING LEAVINGYOUBECALMEDUNTILTHENEXT THREATCOMESALONG 0ROVESTOBESTRESSFULTHEMENTAL IMAGETHATMOTIVATESYOUISOFWHAT YOUWANTTOGETAWAYFROM
)NSPIRESYOUEVENIFYOURCURRENT SITUATIONISUNPLEASANT YOURMENTAL IMAGEISOFWHEREYOUWANTTOBE
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
31/7/06 4:52:17 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0+,fc
h4OWARDvMOTIVATION
2ESULTLEVEL
2ESULTLEVEL
/NEOFTHECHIEFARGUMENTS AGAINSThAWAYFROMv MOTIVATIONISTHATITLEADS TOINCONSISTENTRESULTS)F SOMEONEISMOTIVATEDTO MAKEMONEYPRIMARILY BECAUSESHEGREWUPIN POVERTYANDNEVERWANTS TOGOBACKTHERE HER MOTIVATIONWILLBEGINTO DISAPPEARASSHESTARTS GETTINGRICH ANDRETURN ONCESHEHASLOSTHER MONEY"EHAVIORALEXPERTS HAVESURMISEDTHATTHISIS THEREASONTHATSOME MILLIONAIRESMAKEANDLOSE THEIRFORTUNESSEVERALTIMES OVERTHEYAREWORKINGTO hAWAYFROMvMOTIVATION
-OTIVATION
'ET2ESULTS %VERY4IME
h!WAYFROMvMOTIVATION
0ICK9OUR-OTIVATION2EACHYOUR GOALWITHhTOWARDvMOTIVATIONh!WAY FROMvMOTIVATIONONLYHELPSYOU ESCAPEFROMWHATYOUDONTWANT
,IMITTHE$RAMA IN9OUR,IFE 7EALLFACEACERTAINAMOUNTOFCHALLENGEANDDIFlCULTY SOMEFARMORETHANOTHERS(OWEVER SOMEPEOPLESEEM TOATTRACTDIFlCULTIESEVENINQUITESTRAIGHTFORWARD SITUATIONSWHERENONEPREVIOUSLYEXISTED4HISMAYREmECT ANUNCONSCIOUSNEEDTOBETHEHEROORHEROINEINTHEIR OWNLIFESTORY7HENTHINGSAREGOINGWELL THEYWILL UNCONSCIOUSLYlNDAWAYOFDISRUPTINGTHEMSOTHATTHEY CANCONTINUEINTHEIRHEROICSTRUGGLE
4)0 !SKYOURSELFIFYOUWOULDBEHAPPYTOGET WHATYOUWANTEASILY9OUMAYBECREATINGMORE DRAMATHANYOUNEEDTOBESUCCESSFUL
31_ED245_US 31 )'U;:(*+U9COAU)'
& / #5 3/ .7 ( !49/ 57! . 4
31/7/06 4:52:18 pm '(%*%&,(0(*0+.fc
,OOKAT9OUR,IFE!PPRECIATIVELY 3OCIALPSYCHOLOGISTSHAVEDISCOVEREDTHATPOSITIVE EMOTIONSGIVEUSBENElTSBEYONDJUSTFEELINGGOOD 7HENYOUFEELGOOD ITSEASIERTOSEETHEBIGPICTURE RATHERTHANGETTINGLOSTINDETAIL
&OSTER#REATIVITY 7HENYOUEXPERIENCEPOSITIVE %VERY EMOTIONS YOUAREMORECREATIVE EXPERIENCE THANWHENYOUAREFEELING hNEUTRALv0OSITIVEEMOTIONSHELP POSITIVEOR YOUTOMAKESENSEOFCOMPLEX NEGATIVE INFORMATIONQUICKLY ANDMAKEYOU CANBEUSED LESSLIKELYTOJUMPTOCONCLUSIONS TOLEARN !POSITIVEMINDSETHASPHYSICAL BENElTS TOOITHELPSHEARTRATE ANDBLOODPRESSURETORETURNTONORMALMOREQUICKLYAFTER STRESSFULEVENTS
#ULTIVATEAN!PPRECIATIVE-INDSET "ECAUSEPOSITIVEEMOTIONSHAVETHESEBENElTS ITISUSEFUL TOBUILDONWHATISPOSITIVEINYOURLIFEASABASISFOR MAKINGTHECHANGESYOUWANT(OWEVER ITISNOTALWAYS EASYTOTRYTOSTIMULATEPOSITIVEEMOTIONSTHROUGHHUMOR ORTHROUGHTELLINGOURSELVESTOLOOKONTHEBRIGHTSIDE 2ESEARCHERSINTHERAPIDLYGROWINGlELDOFhPOSITIVE PSYCHOLOGYvTELLUSTHATTHEEASIESTPOSITIVEEMOTIONSTO EVOKE EVENUNDEREXTREMECIRCUMSTANCES ARETHOSEOF GRATITUDEANDCOMPASSION9OUCANUSETHISTO s !PPRECIATEEVENSIMPLETHINGSWITHGRATITUDE s 7HENBADTHINGSHAPPEN ASKYOURSELF h7HATDO) NEEDTOLEARNFROMTHISv s &INDPOSITIVEMEANINGTHROUGHHELPINGACT COMPASSIONATELYTOWARDOTHERS
i
w
)TISOFPRACTICALVALUETOLEARNTOLIKEYOURSELF
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
32_ED245_US 32 &'(#&*'#;;:(*+#7Y^_'(.+++$_dZZ)(
.ORMAN0EALE
31/7/06 4:52:19 pm '(%*%&,)0('0&&fc
-AKETHE-OSTOF'OOD-EMORIES 9OUREMOTIONALRESPONSETOAMENTALIMAGEISDETERMINED ATLEASTASMUCHBYTHEWAYINWHICHYOUTHINKABOUTITAS BYWHATITISTHATYOUARETHINKINGABOUT 4HEVISUALQUALITIESOFANIMAGETELLTHEBRAINHOWMUCHATTENTION TOPAY9OURRESPONSEISSTRONGERWHENANIMAGEISVIVID AND WHENYOUAREINVOLVEDINIT4RYTHISEXPERIMENT
4HINKOFAHAPPYMEMORY!SYOUSEEITINYOURMINDSEYE NOTICEHOWINTENSEYOURPOSITIVEEMOTIONALRESPONSEIS
)STHEPICTURELIFE SIZE ORSMALLER"RINGITUPTOLIFE SIZE )SITINCOLOR ORBLACKANDWHITE-AKEITCOLORFUL 4RYMAKINGITALITTLEBRIGHTER4HENPUTSOMEMOVEMENTINTOIT 3TEPINTOTHEPICTUREANDSEEITTHROUGHYOUROWNEYES .OTICEWHATHAPPENSTOTHEINTENSITYOFHOWTHEMEMORYMAKES YOUFEELAFTEREACHOFTHESTEPSABOVE 5SE0ASTAND&UTURE0OSITIVEIMAGES lLLEDWITHTEXTUREANDMOVEMENT ARE EFFECTIVEMOTIVATIONALAIDS WHETHERTHEYDERIVEFROMMEMORIESORFUTUREHOPES
w
33_ED245_US 33 ))U;:(*+U9COAU))
31/7/06 4:52:20 pm '(%*%&,(0(+0&+fc
&IND7HAT)S!LREADY7ORKING 4HEREISANINCREASINGLYPOPULARAPPROACHTOORGANIZATIONAL ANDPERSONALCHANGECALLED!PPRECIATIVE)NQUIRY WHICH HOLDSTHATTHEBESTWAYTOIMPROVETHINGSISTODISCOVER WHATISALREADYWORKINGANDTHENDOMOREOFIT7ETEND TOGETMOREOFWHATWEFOCUSON0AYINGATTENTIONTOWHAT ISALREADYWORKINGWELLINYOURLIFEISLIKELYTORAISEYOUR MORALEANDYOURSELF ESTEEM ANDINCREASETHEENERGY AVAILABLEFORCHANGINGTHEAREASOFYOURLIFETHATARENOT WORKINGSOWELL
+NOW9OUR3TRENGTHS 4OMAKEITEASIERTOESTABLISHTHEPOSITIVESINYOURMIND TRY THESELINESOFINQUIRY s 7HATDOPEOPLETELLYOUAREYOURSTRENGTHS s 7HATDOTHEPEOPLEWHOCAREABOUTYOUREGARDASYOUR
!CCENTUATETHE0OSITIVE 4HISEXERCISEISDESIGNEDTOHELPYOUFOCUSONTHEASPECTSOFYOUR LIFETHATYOUWANTTOKEEP%VENIFYOUHAVEBEENTELLINGYOURSELF THATYOURLIFEISTERRIBLE THEREAREALWAYSSOMEPOSITIVEELEMENTS
2ATEHOWPOSITIVEYOUFEELATRIGHTNOWONASCALEOFTO 7HATISWORKINGINYOURLIFE7RITEITDOWNITDOESNTMATTER HOWTRIVIALEACHELEMENTSEEMS'OINTOASMUCHDETAILASYOU CAN.OTICEHOWYOUFEELABOUTEACHSMALLELEMENT 7HATAREYOUPROUDOF!GAIN DESCRIBEEACHEVENTANDNOTICE WHATITMEANSTOYOU ANDHOWYOUFEELABOUTIT 7HATAREYOUGOODAT 2EVISITHOWYOUFEEL ANDRATEITONTHE TO SCALEAGAIN4O INCREASETHEPOSITIVEEFFECT YOUCANRETRACETHESTEPSABOVE ADDINGMOREDETAIL SOTHATYOUREALLYINVOLVEYOURSELFWITH EACHPOSITIVEIMAGE
34_ED245_US 34 )*U;:(*+U9COAU)*
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
31/7/06 4:52:22 pm '(%*%&,(0(+0&-fc
GOODQUALITIESANDABILITIES4AKEALOOKATYOURSELF THROUGHTHEIREYESOR BETTERSTILL ASKTHEMYOUMAYBE PLEASANTLYSURPRISED s )MAGINETHATAGOODFRIENDWAS TALKINGABOUTYOUTOSOMEONE "UILDINGON WHOHASNOTMETYOU(OW WHATIS WOULDTHATFRIENDDESCRIBEYOUR ALREADY GOODPOINTS STRONGMAKES .OTICEHOWYOUFEELAFTERFOCUSING ITSTRONGER ONTHEPOSITIVEASPECTSOFYOURLIFE 7HATHASCHANGED
,EARNTO6ALUE!CCEPTANCE 5NTILYOUAREINAPOSITIONTOCHANGETHEPARTSOFYOURLIFE THATYOUDONOTLIKE THEBESTATTITUDETOHAVEISONEOF ACCEPTANCE4HEREISNOPOINTWASTINGYOURENERGYFRETTING ABOUTTHINGSYOUARENOTINAPOSITIONTOCHANGE/NEOF THEBEST KNOWNEXPRESSIONSOFTHEATTITUDEOFACCEPTANCE ISTHEh3ERENITY0RAYER vUSUALLYATTRIBUTEDTOTHE THEOLOGIAN2EINHOLD.IEBUHR)TSHOWSAWISDOMTHAT RESONATESBEYONDANYPARTICULARRELIGIOUSTRADITION 'ODGRANTMETHESERENITY TOACCEPTTHETHINGS)CANNOTCHANGE COURAGETOCHANGETHETHINGS)CAN ANDTHEWISDOMTOKNOWTHEDIFFERENCE
$O-OREOF7HAT7ORKS )NCONTRASTTOPROBLEM FOCUSEDAPPROACHESTOCHANGE THE !PPRECIATIVE)NQUIRYAPPROACHSAYSTHATYOUWILLGETMORE SUSTAINABLECHANGESIFYOUCONCENTRATEONDOINGMOREOF WHATISWORKINGINYOURLIFE)TISEASIERTOENVISAGETHE FUTUREYOUWANTWHENITISBASEDONYOUROWNEXPERIENCES RATHERTHANTRYINGTODREAMITUPINITSENTIRETY
4)0 -AKESUREYOURVISIONOFTHEFUTUREKEEPSTHE GOODASPECTSOFYOURLIFENOWTHISWILLREDUCEYOUR RESISTANCETOCHANGE
35_ED245_US 35 )+U;:(*+U9COAU)+
,/ / +!49/ 5 2, ) & %! 0 0 2 % #) !4 ) 6 % ,9
31/7/06 4:52:23 pm '(%*%&,(0(+0&/fc
3UMMARY4HINK0OSITIVELY !NEGATIVEAPPROACHTOLIFEORLACKOFSELF CONlDENCEDOES MORETHANJUSTMAKEYOUFEELBADABOUTYOURSELF)TCANALSO STOPYOUFROMTAKINGTHEPOSITIVESTEPSYOUNEEDINORDERTO REACHYOURGOALS4OGETWHEREYOUWANTTOGO YOUMUST LEARNTOTAKERESPONSIBILITYFORYOURLIFE APPROACHITWITH CONlDENCE ANDMAKETHEMOSTOFTHEOPPORTUNITIESYOUlND
0LANOF!CTION
4AKE 2ESPONSIBILITY
$EVELOP9OUR 0ERSONAL0OWER
4REATPASTEXPERIENCES ASOPPORTUNITIESTO LEARNANDIMPROVE
0RACTICEPERIPHERALVISIONAS ANAIDTOSTAYINGCALMIN STRESSFULSITUATIONS
!CTIVELYCHOOSETOMAKE DECISIONSRATHERTHAN LETTINGYOURSELFBEPUSHED PASSIVELYINTOSITUATIONS
,EARNHOWTOADJUSTYOUR POSTUREINORDERTOLOCATE YOURCENTERANDINCREASE YOURPERSONALPRESENCE
&OCUSONTHEPRESENTAND DECIDEWHATYOUDLIKETO DODIFFERENTLYINTHEFUTURE
&INDACOMFORTABLEPLACE YOUCANGOTOTAKEREFUGE ANDRECHARGE
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
36_ED245_US 36 7O=IIUF&),U&)-$_dZZ),
31/7/06 4:52:28 pm (,%*%&,')0&+0+(
%NLIST9OUR 5NCONSCIOUS
,OOKAT9OUR,IFE !PPRECIATIVELY
2ECOGNIZEWHEREYOUR FEELINGSANDINSTINCTS WANTTOTAKEYOU
0AYATTENTIONTOWHATIS WORKINGWELLINYOURLIFE ANDIDENTIFYYOURSTRENGTHS
)DENTIFYWHATMOTIVATES YOUANDUSETHISTOGIVE YOURSELFFOCUS
!CCEPTANDMAKETHEMOST OFTHOSETHINGSTHATYOU CANNOTCHANGE
&OCUSONMOVINGTOWARD WHATYOUWANT RATHERTHAN TRYINGTORUNAWAYFROM THINGSTHATYOUDONTWANT
#ONCENTRATEONDOING MOREOFTHOSETHINGSTHAT WORKWELLINYOURLIFE
37_ED245_US 37 7O=IIUF&),U&)-$_dZZ)-
3 5 - - ! 294 ( ) . +0 / 3 ) 4 ) 6 % ,9
31/7/06 4:52:30 pm (,%*%&,')0&,0&,
$EVELOP9OUR3ELF !WARENESS 4HEMORECONSCIOUSYOUAREOFTHEWAYSINWHICHYOU THINKANDBEHAVE THEEASIERYOUWILLlNDITTOIDENTIFY ELEMENTSTHATCALLFORCHANGE$EVELOPINGYOURSELF AWARENESSISAPOWERFULAIDTOACHIEVINGYOURGOALS
,ISTENTO7HAT9OU3AY h)TSAJUNGLEOUTTHEREvh)VEPUTTHATBEHINDMEv4HESE AREMETAPHORS ACOMMONWAYTOEXPRESSTHINGS7HEN SOMEONESAYSh)MINABADRELATIONSHIP vTHEYARETALKING ASIFTHERELATIONSHIPISSOMEKINDOFCONTAINER)FTHEYWERE SPEAKINGLITERALLY THEYWOULDSAYSOMETHINGLIKEh)AM RELATINGBADLYTOTHISOTHERPERSONv4HEIMPLICATIONSOF THEMETAPHORTHATTHERELATIONSHIPHASSOMEKINDOF EXISTENCEOFITSOWNOUTSIDEOFTHESPEAKERAREDIFFERENT FROMTHOSEOFTHESECOND STATEMENT)NTHElRSTCASE MINUTE ITSASIFTHERESNOTHINGTHE PERSONCANDOABOUTTHE RELATIONSHIPINTHESECOND 4OMAKESENSEOFAN CASE THESPEAKERCANDECIDE UNFAMILIARSITUATIONFAST lNDAPOSITIVEMETAPHORFOR TOMAKECHANGESINTHEWAY ITBEFOREYOUACT THEYARERELATING
&)8
4HISGIVESYOUTHERIGHTMENTAL ATTITUDETOlNDAWAYTHROUGH TOASOLUTION L
4HINKOFWIDEOPENMETAPHORS
ADOOROPENING ABROAD SWEEPOFLANDSCAPERATHER THANSMALL ENCLOSEDONES L
7HENYOUCANTHINKWHAT
SOMETHINGUNFAMILIARISLIKE YOUFEELCOMFORTABLEWITHIT L
4HENCOMEBACKTOTHE SITUATIONANDCALMLYTHINKIT THROUGH
%XPRESS9OURSELF /UREMOTIONALSTATEFROM MOMENTTOMOMENTISA RESPONSENOTJUSTTOEXTERNAL EVENTSBUTTOOURINTERNAL WORLDTHEMEMORIESTHAT mEETINGLYCOMETOMINDAND OURIMAGESOFWHATMIGHT HAPPENINTHEFUTURE4HE METAPHORSYOUUSEWILL SUBTLYAFFECTHOWYOUFEEL ANDANYMETAPHORSTHATYOU USEHABITUALLYWILLSHAPE BOTHTHEWAYYOUTHINKAND
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
Sec1_38_ED245_US001 38 ).U;:(*+U9COAU).
10/8/06 10:32:58 am '(%*%&,(0(+0'*fc
THINK
3-!24 IFYOUFEELYOURLIFEISINARUT ANDYOUCANNOTlNDA WAYTOPROGRESS USEMETAPHORTOHELPYOUTHINK CREATIVELY&INDAMETAPHORFORWHEREYOUARERIGHT NOW ANDDEVELOPITTOSEEHOWYOUMIGHTMOVEON !JOURNEYISAUNIVERSALMETAPHORFORLIFETHATANYONECAN RELATETOGOALSAREDESTINATIONS CHALLENGESAREOBSTACLES ALONGTHEWAY ANDSOON9OUCOULDASKYOURSELF IFYOURLIFE WERELIKEAJOURNEY WHATKINDOFJOURNEYWOULDITBE9OU CANWRITEYOURANSWERORDISCUSSITWITHSOMEONEELSE4HE ANSWERSCANBEVERYREVEALING!LIFETHATISLIKEATRAINJOURNEY THATDOESNOTSTOPATTHERIGHTSTATION FOREXAMPLE MAY REVEALTHATYOUNEEDTOPAYMOREATTENTION ANDTOTAKEMORE CONTROLOFYOURDIRECTION
YOURMOOD7HATIMAGESDOYOURHABITUALMETAPHORS EVOKE$OYOUWORKWITHSOMEONEWHOIShAPAINv)S YOURFAMILYLIFEhANIGHTMAREv/RISEVERYTHINGhRUNNING SMOOTHLYv)FYOUUSEUNPLEASANTIMAGES YOUAREEVOKING MATCHINGEMOTIONSINYOURLISTENERSINCLUDINGYOURSELF
2ECOGNIZE9OURh3ELFv /NEOFTHEMOSTCOMMONYETLEASTRECOGNIZEDMETAPHORS ISTHEhSELFv7ETALKABOUTTHESELFASIFITISALAZYSERVANT h)MlNDINGITHARDTOMOTIVATEMYSELFv ORANUNRULYCHILD h)HAVENOSELF DISCIPLINEv 4HISDISTANCESYOUFROMTHE FACTTHATTHEREISJUSTTHEONEPERSONTHEREYOU 2EMEMBERTHATWHATEVERYOUDO ORDONTDO ISYOUR CHOICEANDYOURRESPONSIBILITY
4)0 )FYOUlNDYOURSELFUSINGNEGATIVEMETAPHORS ASKYOURSELF h7HATELSEISTHISSITUATIONLIKE(OW ELSECOULD)DESCRIBEITv
Sec1_39_ED245_US 39 )/U;:(*+U9COAU)/
$ % 6 % ,/ 09/ 5 23 % , & !7! 2 % . % 3 3
31/7/06 5:06:02 pm '(%*%&,(0(+0'+fc
#HART9OUR0ERSONAL(IGHSAND,OWS ()'()-0!#4
.%'!4)6%)-0!#4
s7INNINGADIPLOMA s%ARNINGADEGREEINASUBJECT) LOVED BUTFOUNDCHALLENGING s&INALLYGETTINGTHERIGHT MARKETINGJOB s4HEBIRTHSOFMYCHILDREN s-YPROMOTIONLASTYEAR
s&AILINGMYDRIVINGTEST s3PENDINGTWOYEARSINAJOB )DISLIKED s"EINGPASSEDOVERFORTHE POSITIONIN.EW9ORK s-YDIVORCE s-YPOORRECORDINSALES
#HARTTHE(IGHSAND,OWSOF9OUR,IFE !NOTHERWAYOFVIEWINGYOURLIFEISTOLISTHIGHANDLOW POINTSABRIEFEXAMPLEISSHOWNABOVE 7HENYOUHAVE COMPLETEDYOURLIST LOOKBACKOVERIT.OTICEHOWEACH SIGNIlCANTEXPERIENCEINYOURLIFEHASHELPEDTOMAKEYOU THEPERSONYOUARETODAY&IRST TAKECREDITFORMAKINGTHE HIGHPOINTSHAPPEN!SKYOURSELFTHESEQUESTIONS s (OWDID)CONTRIBUTETOTHATBEINGAHIGHPOINT s 7HATWAS)DOINGRIGHT
,EARNFROMTHE,OW0OINTS 2EMEMBERTHATTHEREISSOMETHINGPOSITIVETOLEARNFROM THEWORSTEXPERIENCES EVENIFITISONLYHOWTOPREVENTA SIMILAREXPERIENCEFROMHAPPENINGAGAIN&ACINGADVERSITY DEVELOPSYOURCHARACTERIFYOUCHOOSETOLEARNFROMIT !SKYOURSELFTHESEQUESTIONS s 7HATPOSITIVETHINGSHAVE)LEARNEDFROMTHAT EXPERIENCE s )NWHATWAYSHASTHISMADEMEASTRONGERWISERMORE COMPASSIONATEPERSON )MAGINETHATYOURLIFEISBEINGMADEINTOAMOVIE7HICH EPISODESWOULDTHEDIRECTOREMPHASIZETOMAKEAN INSPIRINGSTORY7HICHEPISODESWOULDBESELECTEDIFITWAS AFEEL GOODCOMEDY
) 4 3 5 0 4 / 9/ 5
Sec1_40_ED245_US 40 &'(#&*'#;;:(*+#7Y^_'(.+++$_dZZ*&
31/7/06 5:06:03 pm '(%*%&,)0',0+/fc
+EEPA*OURNAL !SWELLASREVIEWINGYOURLIFEWITHTHEBENElTOFHINDSIGHT YOUCANLEARNFROMASITUNFOLDSBYREmECTINGONITEACHDAY 7RITINGYOURTHOUGHTSDOWNHELPSYOUDETACHYOURSELFFROM THEM ASWELLASTEACHINGYOUMOREABOUTYOURSELF 2E READINGPASTENTRIES EVENCOMPARATIVELYRECENTONESWRITTEN JUSTAMONTHORTWOAGO WILLSHOWYOUHOWMUCHYOUREMOTIONAL STATEINmUENCESHOWYOUTHINKANDWHATYOUWRITE 4ENMINUTESOFWRITINGADAYISENOUGHTOGIVEYOUUSEFUL RESULTSITBECOMESEFFORTLESSONCEYOUGETINTOTHEHABIT 7RITEWHATEVERYOUTHINK WITHOUTANALYZINGITORPRE PLANNING WHATYOUAREGOINGTOSAY &INDTHETIMEOFDAYTHATWORKSBESTFORYOU&IRSTTHINGINTHE MORNINGBEFOREYOURMINDGETSINVOLVEDINTHEDAYS DISTRACTIONS WHENYOUCOMEHOMEFROMWORKTODRAWALINE BETWEENWORKANDLEISURE ANDLASTTHINGATNIGHTAREALL POPULARCHOICES ACCORDINGTOTASTE
4UESDAY !PRIL TFEEL THISMORNINGMADEI !WONDERFULSUNRISE DHAVE TOBEUPSOEARLYAN PARTICULARLYINSPIRING EDAYAHEAD TIMETOFOCUSONTH ATIONINFULL EWITHTHEREORGANIZ 4HEOFlCEWASTENS NABLEAND ANAGERSEEMSREASO SWING BUTTHENEWM INTRICKY OODATCOMPROMISE ISTURNINGOUTTOBEG SITUATIONS CEISGOING TOTHE.EW9ORKOFl 0LANNINGFORTHETRIP ERSEEING ENGIVENTHEJOBOFOV SMOOTHLY AND)VEBE NOTTOGET DELEGATES)MTRYING THESCHEDULEFORTHE ONT SINCE)KNOWTHAT)D TOONERVOUSABOUTIT HEN)MTENSE PERFORMATMYBESTW
Sec1_41_ED245_US 41 &'(#&*'#;;:(*+#7Y^_'(.+++$_dZZ*'
$ % 6 % ,/ 09/ 5 23 % , & !7! 2 % . % 3 3
31/7/06 5:06:04 pm '(%*%&,)0',0+'fc
$ECIDE 7HATS )MPORTANT
4OHARNESSTHEPOSITIVEPOWEROFhTOWARDv MOTIVATION YOUNEEDTOBECLEARABOUTWHAT YOUWANT7HENYOUAREBUSYDEALINGWITH THEEVER INCREASINGDEMANDSOFEVERYDAYLIFE ITISEASYTOGETDISTRACTEDFROMGIVINGYOUR OWNNEEDSANDWISHESTHEATTENTIONTHEY DESERVE4HISSECTIONISABOUTFOCUSINGON WHATISREALLYIMPORTANTTOYOU)TSHOWSYOU s(OWTODISTINGUISHBETWEENhURGENTvAND hIMPORTANTv s(OWTOCLARIFYYOURVALUES s(OWTOCHECKFORANDRESOLVEINNERCONmICTS ANDPOTENTIALSELF SABOTAGE
42_ED245_US 42 *(U;:(*+U9COAU*(
31/7/06 4:57:20 pm ''%*%&,,0).0&+fc
43_ED245_US 43 *)U;:(*+U9COAU*)
31/7/06 4:57:21 pm ''%*%&,,0).0&-fc
,OOK!HEAD $OYOULIVEFORTHEMOMENT ORISYOURLIFEPLANNEDOUT INDETAILFROMNOWUNTILBEYONDRETIREMENT0ROBABLY YOUFALLSOMEWHEREBETWEENTHETWO9OUNEEDTOLOOK ATHOWTOMAKEAVISIONOFTHEFUTUREWORKFORYOU
7HERE)S9OUR4IME(ORIZON )FYOUOWNABUSINESS THEDISCIPLINEOFHAVINGTOCREATE ABUSINESSPLANMAYALREADYHAVEFORCEDYOUTOMAKEPLANS BEYONDYOURNATURALTIMEHORIZON)NOURPERSONALLIVES MOSTOFUSCOULDBENElTFROMGIVINGSOMESUSTAINED ATTENTIONTOTHELONGERTERM,OOKINGFARTHERAHEADALLOWS YOUTOSIDESTEPSOMEOFTHENASTYSURPRISESTHATLIFECAN THROWATYOU ANDMEANSTHATYOUSPENDLESSTIMEIN hlRElGHTINGvMODETRYINGTODEALWITHUNEXPECTEDEVENTS
7ORKTOWARD9OUR'OALS )FITISNOTEASYTOTHINKOFYOURGOALSFORSIXYEARSAHEAD THISISVALUABLEINFORMATIONINITSELF4REATITASASIGNTHAT ITISWORTHSPENDINGSOMETIMEDECIDINGWHATYOUWANT INTHEFUTURE2EMEMBERTHATTHISISJUSTASTARTINGPOINT 9OUCANADDTOYOURGOALSASMOREIDEASCOMETOYOU9OU MAYlNDTHATYOUGETCLEARERABOUTYOURVISIONFORTHE FUTUREASYOUCOMPLETETHEEXERCISESINTHENEXTFEWPAGES 4HEYWILLHELPYOUCLARIFYYOURVALUES$ONTBESURPRISEDIF YOURGOALSCHANGEALTOGETHER ORRADICALLYEXPAND ASYOU RAISEYOURSIGHTSANDDISCOVERMOREABOUTWHATYOUWANT
,ONG VERSUS3HORT TERM6IEWS ()'()-0!#4
.%'!4)6%)-0!#4
4AKINGALONG TERMVIEW L%NABLESPROACTIVEDECISIONS L7ORKSWITHhTOWARDv MOTIVATION L)SDRIVENBYPOSSIBILITY L/FFERSCHOICE
4AKINGASHORT TERMVIEW L%NSURESREACTIVEBEHAVIOR L7ORKSWITHhAWAYFROMv MOTIVATION L)SDRIVENBYNECESSITY L#OMPELSYOUTOACT
44_ED245_US 44 **U;:(*+U9COAU**
$ % #) $ % 7 ( !4 3) - 0 / 2 4! . 4
31/7/06 4:57:22 pm ''%*%&,,0).0&/fc
t
4%#(.)15%3 TOPRACTICE
4OENCOURAGEYOURSELFTO FOCUSBEYONDYOUREVERYDAY CONCERNS HOWEVERPRESSING TAKETENMINUTESTOASK YOURSELFTHESEQUESTIONSAND WRITEDOWNYOURANSWERS 4HEYWILLHELPYOUTOGAINA BROADOVERVIEWOFYOURSITUATION 7HATAREYOURGOALSFORSIX YEARSFROMNOW
7HATAREYOURGOALSFORTHREE YEARSFROMNOW 7HATAREYOURGOALSFORONE YEARFROMNOW )TISBESTTOSTARTWITHYOURSIX YEARGOALS BECAUSETHEMEDIUM TERMANDSHORTER TERMGOALSWILL OFTENBESTEPPINGSTONESONTHE WAYTOYOURLONG TERM DESTINATION
0LACE)MPORTANTOVER5RGENT 3TEPHEN#OVEY THEWELL KNOWNAUTHORONBUSINESSAND TIMEMANAGEMENT DRAWSADISTINCTIONBETWEENTASKSTHAT DEMANDTOBEDONEIMMEDIATELY ANDTASKSTHATARE IMPORTANT(EPOINTSOUTTHATTHEIMPORTANTTASKSOFTEN GETPUSHEDTOTHEBACKOFTHELINE BECAUSEWEARETOO BUSYDEALINGWITHTHEURGENTONESEVENTHOSETHATARE NOTIMPORTANT4HEIMPORTANTTASKSOFTENONLYGETDONE INAMADSCRAMBLE WHENTHEYBECOMEURGENTBECAUSEA DEADLINEISLOOMING4HEKEYISTOKNOWWHATISIMPORTANT ANDTOSTAYFOCUSEDONIT/NCEYOUHAVESOMEMEANINGFUL LONG TERMGOALSTOWORKTOWARD THESTEPSTHATWILLGETYOU THEREBECOMEIMPORTANT ANDITISEASIERTOPRIORITIZEYOUR TIME4ACKLINGTHEIMPORTANTTASKSlRSTWILLINCREASEYOUR SENSEOFCONTROLOVERYOURWORKLOAD REDUCEYOURSTRESS LEVELSANDMOSTIMPORTANTOFALLENSURETHATYOU ACCOMPLISHMUCHMORE
4)0 !SKYOURSELF h7HATAM)PUTTINGOFFRIGHT
NOWvANDDOITIMMEDIATELY WITHOUTCONDUCTING ANYMOREINTERNALWILL)WONT)DEBATES
45_ED245_US 45 *+U;:(*+U9COAU*+
,/ / +! ( % ! $
31/7/06 4:57:24 pm ''%*%&,,0).0'&fc
+NOW9OUR6ALUES 9OURVALUESGIVEYOUMOTIVATIONFORYOURACTIONS &OLLOWTHENUMBEREDSTAGESINTHISSECTIONTOESTABLISH WHICHVALUESAREIMPORTANTTOYOU ANDENSURETHATYOU ARECLEARABOUTWHATYOUAREWORKINGTOWARD
9OUR0ERSONAL3CALEOF6ALUES 9OURVALUESAREALSOYOURCRITERIAFORJUDGINGIFSOMETHING ISRIGHTORWRONG4HEYGUIDEYOURDECISIONSANDGIVE MEANINGTOYOURLIFE4HISGUIDANCEOPERATESATAMOREOR LESSUNCONSCIOUSLEVELYOUDONTNEEDTOTHINKABOUTIT /NCEYOUBECOMEAWAREOFYOURVALUES YOUCANUSETHEM ASACHECKLISTTOEVALUATEANYCHOICESYOUAREOFFERED
&IND9OUR6ALUES
46_ED245_US 46 *,U;:(*+U9COAU*,
&IRST lNDYOURVALUESFORA PARTICULARAREAOFYOURLIFE
4HENESTABLISHWHICHOFTHESE VALUESAREMOSTIMPORTANTTOYOU
#HECKFORCLASHESBETWEEN CONmICTINGVALUESANDRESOLVETHEM
#HECKFORhAWAYFROMv MOTIVATIONINTHElNALSETOF VALUES
(OW6ALUES/RIGINATE 9OUACQUIREYOURVALUESAS YOUGROWUP FROMAVARIETY OFINmUENCESAROUNDYOU THEYMIGHTINCLUDEYOUR PARENTS YOURPEERS ORTHE POPULARCULTUREOFYOUR CHILDHOODANDYOUTH/VER TIME INADULTHOOD YOUWILL ALSOlNDTHATYOUMODIFY YOURVALUESINTHELIGHTOF THECONCLUSIONSYOUDRAW FORYOURSELFFROMTHEEVENTS OFYOURLIFE6ALUESARE ABSTRACTCONCEPTSLIKEFUN INTEGRITY LEARNING OR SECURITY SOYOUCANSATISFY THEMINMANYDIFFERENT WAYS5SETHEFOUR NUMBEREDSTAGESSHOWNIN OUTLINEONTHELEFT AND EXPANDEDONTHEFOLLOWING PAGES TOIDENTIFYAND ORGANIZEYOURVALUES
$ % #) $ % 7 ( !4 3) - 0 / 2 4! . 4
31/7/06 4:57:25 pm ''%*%&,,0).0'(fc
'ETTHE"ESTFROMTHE0ROCESS %LICITINGYOURVALUESISASIMPLEYETPOWERFULPROCESSUSETHESE TIPSTOMAKEITMOREREVEALING)TMAYBEEASIERFORSOMEONEELSE TOASKYOUTHEQUESTIONS INSTEADOFASKINGTHEMOFYOURSELF
6ALUESSHOULDBEABSTRACT)FYOUREACHAhCONCRETEvANSWER LIKEhAGOODCOMPANYCARvASACAREERVALUE ASKAGAIN h7HATSIMPORTANTABOUTTHATvUNTILYOUREACHANABSTRACT %VENWHENYOUTHINKYOUHAVERUNOUTOFANSWERS ASKING h7HATSIMPORTANTABOUTAREAvWILLOFTENUNEARTH IMPORTANTVALUESTHATYOUWERELESSCONSCIOUSLYAWAREOF 4HEMOREHONESTYOUAREWITHYOURSELF THEMOREVALUABLEYOUR LISTWILLBETOYOU )FYOURVALUESLISTINCLUDESAWORDLIKEhSATISFACTION v hFULlLLMENT vORhCONTENTMENT vCHECKWHATTHATWORDMEANS TOYOU)FITISWHATYOUWOULDGETIFALLTHEOTHERVALUESONTHE LISTWEREPRESENT YOUCANSAFELYTAKEITOUT
&IND9OUR6ALUESFORA3PECIlC!REA 4HElRSTSTEPISTOTHINKOFTHEAREAOFYOURLIFETHATYOU WANTTOCHANGElRST7HENYOUHAVEDECIDEDWHATITIS ASKYOURSELFTHEFOLLOWINGQUESTIONS s 7HATISIMPORTANTTOMEABOUTAREA 7RITEDOWNTHEIMMEDIATEANSWERTHATCOMESTOMIND 4HENCONTINUETOASK s 7HATELSEISIMPORTANTTOMEABOUTAREA 9OUWILLPROBABLYENDUPWITHALISTOFAROUNDSEVENTOTEN POINTSOFIMPORTANCERELATINGTOTHATAREAALTHOUGHIT MAYBELESSANDITMAYBE MORE4HESEPOINTSARETHE VALUESTHATYOUHOLDFORTHAT )TSNOTHARDTOMAKE DECISIONSWHENYOUKNOW AREAOFYOURLIFE+EEPA WHATYOURVALUESARE NOTEOFTHEM ANDREVISIT THEMIFYOUNEEDTO
47_ED245_US 47 *-U;:(*+U9COAU*-
i
w 2OY$ISNEY
+ . / 79/ 5 26! , 5 % 3
31/7/06 4:57:26 pm ''%*%&,,0).0')fc
%STABLISH9OUR-OST)MPORTANT6ALUES 3OMEVALUESWILLBEMOREIMPORTANTTOYOUTHANOTHERS 4HEMOSTIMPORTANTVALUESWILLBETHEONESTHATHAVETHE MOSTSAYINHOWYOUUSEYOURTIME SOTHENEXTSTEPIN CLARIFYINGYOURPRIORITIESFORYOURCHOSENAREAWILLBETO DISCOVERYOURVALUESHIERARCHY4HElRSTVALUETHATCAME TOMINDINTHEPREVIOUSEXERCISEMAYNOTBETHEMOST IMPORTANT)NFACT SOMEOFTHEhSUBMERGEDvVALUESTHAT CAMEATTHEENDOFTHELISTMAYBETHEONESTHATTURNOUT TOBEMOSTIMPORTANTTOYOU%LICITINGYOURVALUESHIERARCHY ISSIMPLE*USTTAKEYOURLISTOFVALUESFORAGIVENAREAAND ASKYOURSELF s )F)COULDONLYHAVEONEOFTHESEVALUESINAREA WHICH ONEWOULDITHAVETOBE 7HENYOUHAVEIDENTIlEDTHATVALUE ASK s )F)COULDONLYHAVEONEMORE WHICHONEWOULDITBE ANDSOON UNTILYOUHAVEALLTHEVALUESINORDER ,OOKATTHEEXAMPLEBELOW USINGVALUESFOR h7ORKAND#AREERv
48_ED245_US 48 *.U;:(*+U9COAU*.
2EVISEDPRIORITYORDE )NTEGRITY
)NITIAL,IST %NJOYMENT
,EARNING
3ECURITY
0EOPLE
2ECOGNITION
-ONEY
2ESPECT
-AKINGA DIFFERENCE
)NTEGRITY
-AKINGA DIFFERENCE
-ONEY
%NJOYMENT
3ECURITY
0EOPLE
2ECOGNITION 2ESPECT
,EARNING
R
$ % #) $ % 7 ( !4 3) - 0 / 2 4! . 4
31/7/06 4:57:27 pm ''%*%&,,0).0'+fc
$ECIDINGBETWEEN6ALUES )FITSHARDTODECIDEWHICHISTHEMOREIMPORTANTOFTWOVALUES USETHISMETHOD
9OUCANHAVEEITHERONEVALUEORTHEOTHER BUTNOTBOTH 7HICHDOESITHAVETOBE
9OUMAYlNDTHATAVALUEINYOURINITIALLISTTURNSOUT TOBETHESAMEAS ORASLIGHTLYDIFFERENTASPECTOF ANOTHER VALUE)FTHISHAPPENS MERGETHEMSORESPECTAND RECOGNITIONMIGHTBECOMERESPECTRECOGNITION 9OUCANWRITETHEVALUESONSTICKYNOTESTOMAKEITEASIERTO REORDERTHEMITALSOMAKESTHEPROCESSMOREPHYSICALLY INTERACTIVE SOITMAYGIVEYOUADEEPERCONNECTIONWITHIT
-ONEYASA6ALUE )FMONEYCOMESOUTATTHETOPOFTHELIST YOUMAYNEED TODOSOMEADDITIONALWORKONYOURLIST)DEALLY MONEY WOULDBEAhMEANSvVALUE ONETHATISUSEFULBECAUSE HAVINGITHELPSTOFULlLLABSTRACThENDSvVALUES&OR EXAMPLE HAVINGMONEYMIGHTALLOWYOUTOHAVEMORE SECURITY ORFREEDOM-ONEYDOESNOTMAKEAGOODhENDSv VALUE)FSOMEONEHASMONEYATTHETOPOFTHEIRVALUESLIST THEYCOULDENDUPWITHALARGEAMOUNTOFMONEY BUTlND THATITMEANSNOTHINGTOTHEM
+EEP9OUR0RIORITIES&LEXIBLE 4HEVALUESTHATAREMOSTIMPORTANTTOYOUMAYCHANGE OVERTIMEASYOURCIRCUMSTANCESCHANGE)FSOMEONEIS HEAVILYINDEBT MONEYMAYBEHIGHONTHEIRSCALEOF VALUES/NCETHEYHAVEACOMFORTABLEAMOUNTINTHEBANK MONEYMIGHTBELESSIMPORTANT ANDOTHERVALUESMOVEUP THELIST4HEVALUESHIERARCHYTHATYOUELICITEDIN3TAGEIS ASNAPSHOTOFWHEREYOUAREATTHISPOINTINTIME
49_ED245_US 49 */U;:(*+U9COAU*/
+ . / 79/ 5 26! , 5 % 3
31/7/06 4:57:29 pm ''%*%&,,0).0',fc
#HECKFOR#LASHESBETWEEN6ALUES #ONmICTINGVALUESFOREXAMPLE ADVENTUREVERSUSSECURITY INYOURCAREER CANMAKEYOUFEELTORNBETWEENTHEM (ERESHOWTOCHECKTHATYOURVALUESARECOMPATIBLE s 4AKETHELOWESTVALUEONYOURPRIORITIZEDLISTANDCHECK ITAGAINSTTHEONEABOVEIT#ANYOUHAVEBOTH)FYOU FEELTHATTHETWOVALUESCANNOTCOEXIST MARKAN8AT THECLASH#ONTINUETOCHECKTHELOWESTVALUEAGAINST EVERYOTHERVALUE ALLTHEWAYUPTHELIST s 4HENTAKETHENEXTLOWESTVALUE ANDCHECKITAGAINST EACHVALUEABOVEITINTURN s #ONTINUEWITHTHENEXTLOWESTVALUEUNTILYOUHAVE CHECKEDEACHVALUEAGAINSTALLTHEVALUESABOVEIT
2EAD9OUR#HART )NTHESAMPLECHARTBELOW THESUBJECTFEELSTHAT hENJOYMENTvANDhMONEY vANDhSECURITYvAND hRECOGNITIONvAREINCONmICTWITHEACHOTHER4HEYNEEDTO ASKMOREQUESTIONSTORESOLVEHOWTHECLASHINGVALUESCAN BEMET ORTODECIDEONTHEMOREIMPORTANTOFTHETWO
0OTENTIAL6ALUES#LASHES
)NTEGRITY-AKINGA -ONEY %NJOYMENT3ECURITY0EOPLE 2ECOGNITION DIFFERENCE
)NTEGRITY
-AKINGA DIFFERENCE
-ONEY
%NJOYMENT
3ECURITY
0EOPLE
2ECOGNITION
,EARNING
50_ED245_US 50 +&U;:(*+U9COAU+&
$ % #) $ % 7 ( !4 3) - 0 / 2 4! . 4
31/7/06 4:57:30 pm ''%*%&,,0).0'.fc
7HAT9OUR!NSWERS3AYABOUT-OTIVATION 9/52!.37%2
7(!4490%/&-/4)6!4)/.
h"ECAUSE)VEBEENPOOR AND )DIDNTLIKEITv
h!WAYFROMvMOTIVATION
h"ECAUSEOFALLTHEWONDERFUL THINGS)COULDDOWITHITv
h4OWARDvMOTIVATION
h7ELL YOUNEEDMONEYv
#ONCEALEDhAWAYFROMvMOTIVATION IFYOUSAYYOUNEEDSOMETHING WHAT ISREALLYONYOURMINDISWHATWILL HAPPENIFYOUDONTHAVEIT
h)TSBETTERTOHAVEMONEYv
!NOTHERCONCEALEDhAWAYFROMv BETTERTHANWHAT4HANNOTHAVINGIT
h"ECAUSE)CANBUYTHINGS AND )CANUSEITTOBENElTPEOPLE ANDITPROVIDESASAFETYNETv
-OSTLYhTOWARD vWITHSOMEhAWAY FROMv
#HECKFORh!WAY&ROMv-OTIVATION -OTIVATIONCANBETOWARDWHATYOUWANT AWAYFROMWHAT YOUDONTWANT ORAMIXTUREOFTHETWOh!WAYFROMv MOTIVATIONUSUALLYRUNSOUTBEFOREYOUREACHYOURGOAL SO YOUMAYlNDTHATVALUESTHATAREMAINLYhAWAYFROMvWILL NOTBEFULlLLEDCONSISTENTLY4HEKEYQUESTIONFORDETECTING THEDIRECTIONOFMOTIVATIONINEACHVALUEISh7HYIS VALUEIMPORTANTv)NTHECHARTABOVE YOUCANSEEA RANGEOFANSWERSTOTHEQUESTIONh7HYISMONEY IMPORTANTv ALONGSIDETHEMOTIVATIONUNDERPINNINGEACH ONE!LTHOUGHhWHYvISNOTAUSEFULQUESTIONTOASKINA PROBLEM SOLVINGSITUATIONITTENDSTOELICITEITHEREXCUSES ORJUSTIlCATIONS ITISAVALUABLEONEWHENYOUARETRYINGTO ESTABLISHMOTIVATION4OANSWERTHEQUESTION YOUHAVETO ANALYZETHETHINKINGUNDERPINNINGYOURACTIONS ANDITWILL BECOMECLEARWHATYOURMOTIVATIONIS
4)0 "ECOMEMOREAWAREOFOTHERPEOPLES
MOTIVATIONBYNOTICINGTHEhTOWARDvANDhAWAYFROMv CLUESINWHATTHEYSAY
51_ED245_US 51 +'U;:(*+U9COAU+'
+ . / 79/ 5 26! , 5 % 3
31/7/06 4:57:31 pm ''%*%&,,0).0'/fc
2ESOLVE6ALUES#ONmICTS )FYOUDISCOVEREDTHATTWOOFYOURVALUESCONmICTWITH ONEANOTHER THEREARESEVERALPOSSIBLEMETHODSFORYOU TOTRYTOWORKTOWARDARESOLUTION
3ATISFY"OTH6ALUES !SKYOURSELFWHATNEEDSTOHAPPENTOMAKEITPOSSIBLETO SATISFYBOTHVALUESATTHESAMETIME4HENMAKEITHAPPEN !LTERNATIVELY TAKEONEOFTHECLASHINGVALUESANDASK YOURSELFh)F)HAVETHATVALUEFULLY WHATWOULDITGIVEME THATISEVENMOREIMPORTANTv4HISSHOULDGIVEYOUA HIGHERVALUE!SKTHESAMEQUESTIONUNTILYOUCANTGET ANYHIGHER4HENDOTHESAMETHINGWITHTHEOTHERVALUE 9OUMAYlNDTHATTHEHIGHERVALUESAREMORECOMPATIBLE WITHONEANOTHERTHANTHELOWERONESWERE
-OVINGTOh4OWARDv !SKYOURSELFSOMESEARCHINGQUESTIONS s )FYOUAREMAINLYFOCUSEDONWHATYOUWANTTOGET AWAYFROMORAVOID WHATDOYOUWANTINSTEADOFTHAT s )FYOUKNEWTHATYOUWERECOMPLETELYSAFEFROMWHAT YOUWANTTOAVOID ANDTHEREWASNOCHANCEOFITS HAPPENING WHATWOULDTHATFREEYOUUPTODO s )FYOURPRACTICALANDlNANCIALNEEDSWOULDBEMET WHATEVERYOUDID WHATWOULDYOUWANTTODO
#!3%STUDY2ECONCILINGTHE/PTIONS $OINGAGOODJOBANDQUALITYTIME WITHHISFAMILYAREBOTHIMPORTANT TO9UKIO(EFOUND THOUGH THAT STAYINGLATEATWORKWASEATING INTOHISFAMILYTIMEANDLEFTHIM FEELINGRESENTFULWHILEATWORK AND ANXIOUSWHILEATHOMEINNEITHER PLACEWASHEGIVINGHISBEST
52_ED245_US 52 +(U;:(*+U9COAU+(
s9UKIOLOOKEDATHISTIME MANAGEMENTANDMADESOME EFlCIENCYSAVINGS ENABLINGHIM TOGETAWAYFROMWORKEARLIER s9UKIOLEARNEDTOBALANCETWO CONmICTINGREQUIREMENTS!SHE FELTLESSTENSE HISCREATIVITYAT WORKACTUALLYIMPROVED
$ % #) $ % 7 ( !4 3) - 0 / 2 4! . 4
31/7/06 4:57:33 pm ''%*%&,,0).0('fc
'IVE9OUR6ALUES6OICES 5SEVISUALIZATIONTOGIVEYOURCONmICTINGVALUESTHEIROWN VOICES3TEPOUTSIDEYOURSELFANDSEEHOWTHEYNEGOTIATE WITHEACHOTHER"YOBJECTIFYINGYOURVALUES YOUWILLlNDIT EASIERTOESTABLISHWHATISREALLYIMPORTANTTOYOU
)MAGINEYOUHAVEONEOFYOURVALUESSITTINGINTHEPALMOF YOURHAND7HATDOESITLOOKLIKE7HATDOESITSVOICESOUND LIKE$OTHESAMEWITHTHEOTHERVALUE INTHEOTHERHAND !SKONEOFTHEVALUESWHATITISTRYINGTODOFORYOUANDWHAT ISREALLYIMPORTANTTOIT)MAGINEANANSWERTHATFEELSRIGHT 2EPEATTHEPROCESSWITHTHEOTHERVALUE !SKTHETWOVALUESIFTHEYNOWREALIZETHATTHEYBOTHWANTTHE BESTFORYOU !SKEACHVALUETOTELLTHEOTHERWHATITNEEDSTOKNOW )MAGINEWHATTHETWOWOULDLOOKLIKEIFTHEYMERGED 7HENTHEVALUESAREASCLOSEASPOSSIBLE LETYOURHANDSRELAX ASYOUTAKETHEVALUESBACK 0ERSONALIZE9OUR6ALUES!STHEY 4AKEALITTLETIMEANDWAYS ACQUIRETHEIROWNVOICES YOUWILLlND OFFULlLLINGBOTHMAYCOME ITMUCHEASIERTOACTASANOBJECTIVE MEDIATORBETWEENTHEM TOYOU
53_ED245_US 53 +)U;:(*+U9COAU+)
31/7/06 4:57:34 pm ''%*%&,,0).0(+fc
3UMMARY+NOW9OUR6ALUES 4HEVALUESTHATAREIMPORTANTTOYOU THEABSTRACTCONCEPTS SUCHASLOVE FRIENDSHIP SECURITY ORRECOGNITION PROVIDE MOTIVATIONFORYOURACTIONSANDHELPGUIDEYOURDECISIONS &ORANYAREAOFYOURLIFETHATYOUWANTTOCHANGE ITIS HELPFULTOTHINKABOUTTHEVALUESTHATINSPIREYOUINTHATAREA OFYOURLIFEANDTHECONmICTSBETWEENTHESECONCEPTS
0LANOF!CTION
&INDTHEVALUESTHAT AREIMPORTANTTOYOUFORA PARTICULARAREAOFYOURLIFE
%STABLISHWHICHOF THESEVALUESAREMOST IMPORTANTTOYOU
+NOW9OUR6ALUES $OANYOFTHEVALUESEXPRESS ACONCRETEGOAL RATHERTHAN ANABSTRACTCONCEPT
9%3
!SKYOURSELFhWHYISTHIS IMPORTANTTOMEvUNTILYOU REACHANABSTRACTCONCEPT
9%3
-ERGETHETWOVALUESINTO ONETHATCOMBINESBOTH ASPECTSOFTHEVALUE
./
$OANYOFTHEVALUESSEEM THESAMEAS ORVERYSIMILAR TO ANOTHERVALUEONTHELIST
./ #HECKFORVALUESTHATARE ONLYIMPORTANTTOYOU BECAUSETHEYHELPYOU ACHIEVEOTHERVALUES
2EPLACETHESEhMEANSv VALUESWITHTHEhENDSv VALUESTHATTHEYHELPACHIEVE
$ % #) $ % 7 ( !4 3) - 0 / 2 4! . 4
54_ED245_US 54 7O=IIUF&+*U&++$_dZZ+*
31/7/06 4:57:39 pm '(%*%&,'(0&*0*-fc
#HECKFORhAWAY FROMvMOTIVATIONINTHE lNALSETOFVALUES
#HECKFORCLASHES BETWEENCONmICTINGVALUES ANDRESOLVETHEM
2ESOLVE6ALUE#ONmICTS
55_ED245_US 55 7O=IIUF&+*U&++$_dZZ++
6ISUALIZEEACHCONmICTING VALUEASANINDIVIDUAL hVOICE vANDACTASAN OBJECTIVEMEDIATOR BETWEENTHEM
#ANYOUCHANGETHESITUATION SOYOUCANSATISFYBOTH VALUESATTHESAMETIME
9%3
-AKETHESECHANGES HAPPEN
./ ,OOKFORTHEHIGHERVALUE THATISCOMMONTOBOTH AND GETTHEM ATTHELEAST TO AGREETOWORKTOGETHER
-ODIFYTHEWORDINGOFTHE CONmICTINGVALUESTOSHOW HOWTHEYARECOMPATIBLE
3 5 - - ! 29+ . / 79/ 5 26! , 5 % 3
31/7/06 4:57:40 pm '(%*%&,'(0&*0)*fc
#LEAR THE "LOCKS
4HEBIGGESTOBSTACLESTOACHIEVINGOURGOALS AREWITHINOURSELVES4OSETOUTFORYOURGOALS WITHCONlDENCETHATYOUWILLACHIEVETHEM YOUlRSTNEEDTOLETGOOFANYLIMITINGBELIEFS ANDCLEAROUTANYBLOCKSWITHINYOURSELF4HIS SECTIONWILLHELPYOUTO s)DENTIFYANDLOOSENUPLIMITINGBELIEFS s'ETYOURSELFOUTOFARUT s$EFUSETHETRIGGERSFORPROBLEMS s(ANDLEYOURINNERCRITIC s$EALWITHDIFlCULTPEOPLE
56_ED245_US 56 +,U;:(*+U9COAU+,
31/7/06 4:57:45 pm ''%*%&,,0).0))fc
57_ED245_US 57 +-U;:(*+U9COAU+-
31/7/06 4:57:46 pm ''%*%&,,0).0)+fc
$EFEAT,IMITING"ELIEFS !NYTHINGYOUBELIEVETHATHOLDSYOUBACKCANBE DESCRIBEDASALIMITINGBELIEF)TCOULDBEABELIEFABOUT YOUROWNCAPABILITIES ABOUTHOWTHEWORLDWORKS OR ABOUTHOWYOUOROTHERPEOPLESHOULDBEHAVE
,OOKAT9OUR"ELIEFS !SACHILD YOUTAKEYOURBELIEFSFROMOTHERPEOPLE/NCE YOUHAVESOMEBELIEFSINPLACE YOUUSETHEMASTHEBASIS FORFORMINGNEWBELIEFS!SSOONASYOUSTARTBASINGYOUR BELIEFSONOTHERBELIEFS RATHERTHANONTHEEVIDENCEOF YOURSENSES YOULOSETHEREALITYCHECKTHATWOULDMAKE YOUUPDATEYOURBELIEFSINTHELIGHTOFNEWEVIDENCE7HAT YOUTELLYOURSELFACTSLIKEASELF HYPNOTICSUGGESTIONITBEGINSTO INmUENCEYOURVIEWOFREALITY4HIS /URLONGEST ISALLTHEMOREINSIDIOUSBECAUSE MOSTOFTHETIMEYOUARENOT HELDBELIEFS CONSCIOUSLYPAYINGATTENTIONTO MAYBETHE YOURINTERNALDIALOGUE SOWHATITIS MOSTLIMITING SAYINGGOESUNCHALLENGEDBYYOUR CONSCIOUSMIND
)DENTIFY,IMITING"ELIEFS "ECOMINGAWAREOFBELIEFSTHATYOUlNDLIMITINGISTHElRST STEPTOCHANGINGTHEM4HEYARENOTALWAYSOBVIOUS BUT THEYUSUALLYSHOWUPlRSTATACONSCIOUSLEVELASFEELINGSOF DISCOMFORT IRRITATION ORANXIETYWHENTHINKINGABOUTA PARTICULARISSUE&OREXAMPLE IFYOUREWORRIEDABOUT PUTTINGYOURSELFFORWARDFORPROMOTIONATWORK YOUCOULD SAYOUTLOUD h)CANDOTHATJOBEASILYv9OURIMMEDIATE INNERRESPONSEMIGHTBEh.O)COULDNT THEYLLSEETHROUGH MEINAMINUTE)DONTHAVEENOUGHEXPERIENCE vANDSO ON3OYOUCOULDWRITEDOWNTHETHREELIMITINGBELIEFS EXACTLYASYOUEXPRESSEDTHEMTOYOURSELFINTERNALLY s )COULDNTDOTHATJOB s 4HEYLLSEETHROUGHME s )DONTHAVEENOUGHEXPERIENCE
58_ED245_US 58 +.U;:(*+U9COAU+.
#, % ! 2 4 ( % " , / #+ 3
31/7/06 4:57:47 pm ''%*%&,,0).0)-fc
#HECK9OUR3ELF 4ALK ).$)#!4/27/2$ 7(!4)4).$)#!4%3!.$7(!4 /20(2!3% 4/!3+9/523%,&
3HOULD OUGHTTO
)FYOUHAVERULESFORHOWPEOPLEhSHOULDvBEHAVE YOUARESETTINGYOURSELFUPFORDISAPPOINTMENTWHEN THEYDONTLIVEUPTOTHESESTANDARDS!SKYOURSELF h7HATWOULDHAPPENIF)THEYDONTv
)MUST )HAVETO
4 HISWAYOFTHINKINGINDICATESTHATYOUFEELCOMPELLED TODOSOMETHING RATHERTHANWILLINGLYCHOOSINGTODO IT"UTAREYOUREALLYCOMPELLED4OUNCOVERWHATIS BEHINDTHISFEELING ASKYOURSELFh7HATWILLHAPPENIF )DONTv
-AKESME
SINh3HEMAKESMEANGRYv4HISABDICATESYOUR ! PERSONALRESPONSIBILITYBYASSUMINGTHATANOTHER PERSONHASCONTROLOVERYOURFEELINGSORACTIONS !SKYOURSELFh2EALLY(OWDIDWHATSHEDIDORSAID CAUSEMETOGETANGRYv
)CANT
)FTHISMEANSh)CANTDOTHISYET vASKh7HATSTOPS YOUv)FITMEANSh)DONTWANTTO vASKh7HAT WOULDHAPPENIFYOUDIDv
!LWAYS NEVER EVERYONE NOBODY
4HISINDICATESASWEEPINGGENERALIZATION TOWHICH THEREWILLUSUALLYBEEXCEPTIONS*USTPUTAQUESTION MARKAFTERTHEWORDhALWAYSv
4RY
h 4RYvINDICATESTHATYOUAREDOUBTFUL ORTHATYOUMAY NOTSUCCEED)NSTEAD SAYh)WILLv
#HALLENGE9OUR"ELIEFS *USTWRITINGTHELIMITINGBELIEFSDOWNDISTANCESTHEMFROM YOUANDSTARTSTOLOOSENTHEMUP3INCEYOUARENOW AWAREOFTHEM YOUCANBEGINTOQUESTIONIFTHEYAREREALLY TRUE,IMITINGBELIEFSAREOFTENINDICATEDBYRECURRINGWORDS ANDPHRASESINWHATWESAY)FYOUlNDYOURSELFUSINGANY OFTHESEPHRASESINYOURINTERNALDIALOGUE ASKYOURSELFTHE INDICATEDQUESTIONTOUNCOVERTHELIMITINGBELIEFAND RECONNECTITWITHREALITY7ITHPRACTICE YOUWILLSOONlND THATTHESEPHRASESRINGALARMBELLSFORYOUANDWARNYOUIF YOUARESTRAYINGINTONEGATIVETHOUGHTPATTERNS
59_ED245_US 59 +/U;:(*+U9COAU+/
$ % & % !4, ) - ) 4 ) . '" % , ) % & 3
31/7/06 4:57:48 pm ''%*%&,,0).0)/fc
,OOSEN,IMITING"ELIEFS %VENIFYOUHAVEHELDSOMEOFTHEBELIEFSTHATLIMITYOUFOR AVERYLONGTIME YOUCANSTILLLOOSENTHEMCOMPARATIVELY EASILY4RYTHEFOLLOWINGTECHNIQUES s 4URNTHEMINTOQUESTIONS!DDAQUESTIONMARKONTO THEENDOFEACHBELIEFANDSAYITOUTLOUDASAQUESTION 4HISINTRODUCESDOUBTANDMAKESYOUCOMPARETHE BELIEFWITHYOURCURRENTREALITYALOTMAYHAVE HAPPENEDSINCEYOUACQUIREDTHEBELIEFORIGINALLYANDIT MAYNOLONGERBETRUE)FYOUAREDOUBTFULABOUTYOUR ABILITYTODOAJOB FOREXAMPLE SAYINGh)DONTHAVE ENOUGHEXPERIENCEvAUTOMATICALLYMAKESYOUSTART LOOKINGFOREXAMPLESOFRELEVANTEXPERIENCEFROMYOUR WORKHISTORYUPTONOW s !SKYOURSELFWHERETHEBELIEFCAMEFROM!SCHILDREN WEINTERNALIZETHINGSTHATPEOPLETELLUS!TANEARLYAGE WECANTUSELOGICTOCHECKTHEVALIDITYOFWHATWEARE TOLD SOWEJUSTACCEPTIT4HINKABOUTWHENYOUlRST ACQUIREDTHATLIMITINGBELIEFITMAYBEOLDERTHANYOU THINKANDWHOYOUGOTITFROM.OWTHATYOUHAVE YOURADULTWISDOMANDPOWERSOFLOGIC WOULDYOUSTILL CHOOSETOTAKETHATBELIEFONBOARD s !SKYOURSELFWHATTHEBELIEFISCOSTINGYOU)FYOUGO ONBELIEVINGTHIS WHATWILLTHENEGATIVEEFFECTBE)F YOUCHOOSETOBELIEVESOMETHINGMOREEMPOWERING WHATWILLYOUGAIN
THINK
3-!24 "YREFORMULATINGTHELIMITINGBELIEFASANASPIRATIONAL QUESTION YOUCANTURNITAROUND )FYOUPUTTHEWORDSh(OWCAN)xvINFRONTOFTHE PROBLEMATICBELIEF YOUTURNITINTOADIRECTIONFORACTION&OR EXAMPLE YOUCANREPLACEh)DONTHAVETHETIMEvWITHh(OW CAN)lNDTHETIMEv
#, % ! 2 4 ( % " , / #+ 3
60_ED245_US 60 &+,#&-)#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ,&
31/7/06 4:57:50 pm '(%*%&,(0*/0(*fc
2EHEARSING.EW"ELIEFS )FSIMPLYINSTALLINGANEWSETOFBELIEFSSEEMSTOOHARDTOYOU TRY THEMOUTBYMENTALLYREHEARSINGHOWTHEYWILLFEEL)TWILLHELP YOUREALIZETHATITISPOSSIBLETOCHANGETHEWAYYOUTHINKANDACT
)DENTIFYWHATYOUWOULDCHOOSETOBELIEVEINSTEADOFTHE LIMITINGBELIEF
2UNAMENTALMOVIEINWHICHYOUSEEYOURSELFACTINGFROMTHE NEWBELIEF INASITUATIONWHEREITISAPPROPRIATE
2EPEATTHEMOVIE MAKINGITMOREVIVIDEACHTIME UNTILIT STARTSTOLOOKCONVINCING
-AKEANYADJUSTMENTSYOUNEEDTO 3TEPINTOTHEhYOUvINTHEMOVIEANDRUNITAGAIN SOTHATYOU CANFEELWHATITISLIKETOACTFROMTHENEWBELIEF.OTICEHOW THINGSTURNOUTDIFFERENTLY 4RYOUTACTINGONYOURNEWBELIEFINANON THREATENINGREAL LIFE SITUATIONANDNOTICEHOWTHINGSTURNOUTDIFFERENTLY
s !SKYOURSELFWHATTHEBELIEFISTRYINGTODOFORYOU 7HATISTHEPOSITIVEINTENTIONBEHINDTHATBELIEF&OR EXAMPLE ITMAYBETRYINGTOPRESERVEYOUFROM DISAPPOINTMENT )SITACHIEVINGIT4RYTOTHINKOFWAYS INWHICHYOUCANLETGOOFTHEBELIEFBUTACHIEVETHE POSITIVEOUTCOMEITWASTRYINGTOGETFORYOU s !SKYOURSELFIFEVERYONEBELIEVESTHESAMETHING$OES EVERYONEYOUKNOWSHARETHISLIMITINGBELIEF)FYOUCAN THINKOFSOMEONEWHODOESNOT WHATENABLESTHEMTO BELIEVESOMETHINGDIFFERENT)FTHEYCANDOIT THENYOU SHOULDBEABLETO TOO
4)0 ,OOKBACKOVERYOURLIFEHISTORYFORREPEATING PATTERNS7HENYOULEARNFROMYOURMISTAKES YOU DONTHAVETOREPEATTHEM
61_ED245_US 61 &+,#&-)#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ,'
$ % & % !4, ) - ) 4 ) . '" % , ) % & 3
31/7/06 4:57:51 pm '(%*%&,(0*.0''fc
$EALWITH0ROBLEMS !NYPROBLEMHASATHREE PARTSTRUCTURE WHICHGIVESYOU THREEWAYSTOTACKLEITCHANGETHESITUATION CHANGE HOWYOUINTERPRETIT ORCHANGEYOURRESPONSETOIT%VEN IFTHElRSTISNOTPOSSIBLE THEOTHERTWOALWAYSARE
3TAY2ELAXEDAND0OSITIVE 3OMETIMESYOURMINDSATTEMPTSTOSOLVEAPROBLEMCAN ACTUALLYHELPTOKEEPTHEPROBLEMINPLACE&OREXAMPLE SOMEONEWHOHASSUFFEREDABADRELATIONSHIPBREAKUPMAY lNDTHEMSELVESPULLINGBACKEMOTIONALLYWHENTHEIRNEW PARTNERGETSTOOSERIOUS4HISCOULDRESULTINTHEBREAKUPOF THECURRENTRELATIONSHIPTHEVERYTHINGTHEYWERETRYINGTO AVOID4RYINGTOSOLVEAPROBLEMBYCONTINUALLYTURNINGIT OVERINYOURMINDMAYEMBEDITDEEPER4HEhSOLUTION FOCUSvAPPROACHINTHERAPYSUGGESTSADIFFERENTMETHODIF YOUFOCUSYOURATTENTIONONWHATLIFEWOULDBELIKEIFTHE PROBLEMWERESOLVED YOUWILLBEMORELIKELYTOTHINKAND ACTINWAYSTHATLEAVETHEPROBLEMBEHIND
&OCUSONTHE3OLUTION
62_ED245_US 62 ,(U;:(*+U9COAU,(
0ROBLEM !CTION 3OLUTION
7HATIS )MPORTANT )FYOULETTHE PROBLEMOCCUPYALL THEFOREGROUND YOU CANHARDLYSEETHE SOLUTIONREVERSETHE SCALE ANDTHE SOLUTIONISCLEAR
3OLUTION !CTION 0ROBLEM
#, % ! 2 4 ( % " , / #+ 3
31/7/06 4:57:52 pm ''%*%&,,0).0*)fc
'ETTING9OURSELF/UTOFA2UT 3OMETIMESYOUCANlNDYOURSELFGOINGOVERANDOVERYOUR PROBLEMS FEELINGLOWINENERGY ANDTELLINGYOURSELFTHATTHEREIS NOTHINGTOLOOKFORWARDTO)FYOUEVERGETINTOTHATKINDOFRUT HEREARESOMETRIED AND TESTEDWAYSTOGETYOURSELFOUTOFIT %XERCISERESEARCHSHOWSTHATREGULARVIGOROUSEXERCISEPRODUCES BRAINCHEMICALSTHATHAVETHEEFFECTOFMAKINGUSFEELGOOD 0LANTHINGSTOLOOKFORWARDTOREMEMBERTOSCHEDULETREATSFOR YOURSELFEVENWHENYOUAREBUSYANDDISTRACTED TOAVOIDhEMPTY WEEKENDvSYNDROME )NTERRUPTRECURRINGPATTERNSIFYOUAREGETTINGSTUCKINA FAMILIARPATTERNTHATISAFFECTINGYOURENERGY INTERRUPTITBYDOING SOMETHINGDIFFERENT'ETSOMEIDEASBYASKINGYOURSELF 7HATWOULDMYFAVORITE46CHARACTERDOINSTEAD 7HATISTHEMOSTOUT OF CHARACTERTHING)COULDDO 7HATWOULDACONCERNEDFRIENDADVISEMETODO
5SETHE-IRACLE1UESTION 3OWHATEVERTHEPROBLEMYOUARETRYINGTOSOLVE ASK YOURSELFTHISQUESTIONh)FAMIRACLEWERETOHAPPENTONIGHT WHILE)AMASLEEP SOTHEPROBLEMWASCOMPLETELYSOLVED WHATISGOINGTOTELLMETHATTHEPROBLEMHASGONEAWAY WHEN)WAKEUPTOMORROWv4HINKAROUNDTHEANSWER GIVINGITTHETIMEITDESERVES ANDGOINTOASMUCHDETAILAS POSSIBLEONWHATTHESOLUTIONWILLSEEMLIKEANDHOWITWILL CHANGETHINGS!GOODSUPPLEMENTARYBACK UPQUESTIONTO GETYOUTHINKINGABOUTHOW YOUWILLBEBEHAVING 4HEUNIVERSEISCHANGE DIFFERENTLYISh(OWWILL OTHERPEOPLEAROUNDMEBE OURLIFEISWHATOUR ABLETOTELLTHATTHISMIRACLE THOUGHTSMAKEIT
63_ED245_US 63 ,)U;:(*+U9COAU,)
i
i
HASHAPPENEDv
-ARCUS!URELIUS
$ % ! ,7 ) 4 (0 2 / " , % - 3
31/7/06 4:57:54 pm ''%*%&,,0).0*+fc
3CALETHE0ROBLEM 4RYTHISQUESTIONWHEREWOULDYOUPLACETHEPROBLEMYOU AREDEALINGWITHONASCALEOFTO WHEREISTHEWORST ITHASEVERBEENANDISWHEREYOUWILLBEWHENTHE PROBLEMISCOMPLETELYSOLVED!SSIGNINGTHENUMBER ACTIVATESTHELEFTHEMISPHEREOFTHEBRAIN WHICHISMORE ASSOCIATEDWITHPOSITIVEEMOTIONSTHANTHERIGHT4OMOVE TOWARDACTION ASKWHATWOULDBEDIFFERENTIFYOUWERE ONENUMBERABOVEYOURCURRENTRATING(OWWOULDYOUR THOUGHTS FEELINGS ACTIONS ANDTHEOUTSIDEWORLDDIFFER 4HISWILLHELPYOUTOTAKETHElRSTSTEPTOWARDASOLUTION
5SE9OUR4HOUGHTSTO(ELP #OMMONSENSETELLSUSTHATIFWETHINKABOUTUNPLEASANT THINGS WEFEELBAD ANDIFWETHINKABOUTPLEASANTTHINGS WEFEELGOOD!SWEHAVEALREADYSEENWITHTHETECHNIQUE FORMAKINGTHEMOSTOFYOURGOODMEMORIES THEWAYTHAT WETHINKABOUTTHINGSHASABIGIMPACTONTHEINTENSITYOF WHATWEFEELABOUTTHEM
#!3%STUDY%LIMINATING!NXIETY 0ARTOF*OHNSJOBINVOLVEDGIVING PRESENTATIONS ANDHEGOTVERY NERVOUSABOUTTHEM"EFORE EACHONEHEWOULDRUNMOVIESIN HISHEAD WITHTHEAIMOFBEING hPREPAREDFORTHEWORSTv"ECAUSE THEMOVIESWEREhSHOTvFROMHIS OWNPOINTOFVIEWASPRESENTER HEFELTMOREANXIOUSTHEMORE SCENARIOSHEIMAGINED7HENHIS COLLEAGUESUGGESTEDHETRYVIEWING THEMENTALMOVIESASANOBJECTIVE OBSERVER RATHERTHANAPARTICIPANT HEBECAMEMUCHLESSANXIOUS
64_ED245_US 64 ,*U;:(*+U9COAU,*
s*OHNFOUNDTHATADETACHED POINTOFVIEWDISTANCEDHIMFROM UNHELPFULEMOTIONS s7ITHPRACTICE HECOULDSEE HISFUTURESELFCOPINGCALMLYWITH MISHAPSANDTOUGHQUESTIONS (ISPRESENTATIONSWENTBETTER BECAUSEHEWASLESSNERVOUS s(EFOUNDHECOULDGETEVEN BETTERRESULTSBYIMAGINING PRESENTATIONSTHATWEREWELL RECEIVED BECAUSEMENTALLY REHEARSINGSUCCESSMAKES SUCCESSMORELIKELY
#, % ! 2 4 ( % " , / #+ 3
31/7/06 4:57:55 pm ''%*%&,,0).0*,fc
t
4%#(.)15%3 TOPRACTICE
4EACHYOURSELFTODEFUSETHE )SITTHREE DIMENSIONALORmAT IMPACTOFANEGATIVEIMAGE .OWMAKETHEIMAGESMALLER 4HINKOFAFOODTHATDISGUSTS ANDFARTHERAWAYFROMYOU YOU!SYOUVISUALIZETHEIMAGE WORKONMAKINGITmAT DIM MAKEAMENTALNOTEOFHOW MONOCHROME ANDSTILL INTENSEYOURFEELINGOFDISGUSTIS .OTICEHOWINTENSEYOUR .OTICEHOWBIGTHEPICTUREIS FEELINGOFDISGUSTISNOW9OU .OTICEHOWCOLORFULITIS SHOULDlNDTHATITHASREDUCED )SITMOVINGORSTILL INSTRENGTH
!LTER9OUR6IEWPOINT /NEOFTHEMOSTPOWERFULWAYSTOALTERTHEIMPACTOF AMENTALIMAGEISTOCHANGETHEPOINTOFVIEWFROMWHICH YOULOOKATIT)FYOUAREVIEWINGAMEMORYFROMTHEPOINT OFVIEWTHATYOUHADWHENITHAPPENED SEEINGITTHROUGH YOUROWNEYES YOUWILLlNDTHATYOUREVISITTHEMEMORY EXACTLYASYOUREMEMBERIT ANDWILLPROBABLYALSOFEELTHE EMOTIONTHATGOESWITHTHATMEMORY)F HOWEVER YOUTAKE THEPOINTOFVIEWOFANIMPARTIALOBSERVER SOMEONE LOOKINGATTHESCENEFROMTHEOUTSIDE SOTHATRATHERTHAN BEINGYOURSELF YOUARESEEINGANIMAGEOFYOURSELF YOU WILLlNDTHATYOUAREAUTOMATICALLYMOREDETACHEDFROM THEACCOMPANYINGEMOTION9OUCANREDUCETHEEMOTION EVENMOREBYSENDINGTHEIMAGEFARTHERAWAYINYOUR PERCEPTUALSPACE BYDRAININGTHECOLOROUTOFIT ANDBY MAKINGITDIMMER BLURRIER ORMOREFADED0RACTICETHISWAY OFTHINKINGREGULARLY SOTHATWHENYOUREALLYNEEDTO SWITCHYOURVIEWPOINT YOUCANDOSOEASILY
4)0 !LTERINGYOURMENTALIMAGESISASKILLTHATYOU CANLEARNFAIRLYQUICKLYEMOTIONALLYNEUTRALIMAGES AREEASIERTOPRACTICEON
65_ED245_US 65 ,+U;:(*+U9COAU,+
$ % ! ,7 ) 4 (0 2 / " , % - 3
31/7/06 4:57:56 pm ''%*%&,,0).0*.fc
$EFUSE0ROBLEM4RIGGERS ,IKEEVERYONEELSE YOUWILLUNDOUBTEDLYHAVESOME TRIGGERSFORAUTOMATICRESPONSES BUTWHILEMANYRESPONSES WILLBENEARLYUNIVERSALIFYOUAREOUTDRIVINGANDYOUSEE AREDLIGHTAHEAD FOREXAMPLE ITSLIKELYTHATYOU LIKEEVERY OTHERDRIVER WILLlNDYOURSELFAUTOMATICALLYWANTINGTO BRAKEOTHERSWILLBEHIGHLYPERSONALIZEDANDWILLBEYOURS ALONE9OUPROBABLYKNOWWHATTHEYARE BUTITISPOSSIBLE TOLEARNSOMEEFFECTIVEWAYSOFDEFUSINGTHEMANDROBBING THEMOFTHEIRPOWEROVERYOU3OMEOFTHETRIGGER RESPONSEPAIRINGSYOUHAVEPICKEDUPALONGTHEWAYMAY BEPARTICULARLYUNHELPFULIFTHEYATTACHTHEMSELVESTO BROADERSITUATIONS&OREXAMPLE IF ASACHILD YOUORIGINALLY STARTEDTOFEELANXIOUSWHENYOUSAWAFROWNONYOUR PARENTSFACE BUTNOWlNDTHATTHATANXIETYISTAPPEDBY ALMOSTANYONEFROWNINGATYOU FROMYOURBOSSTOA PARKINGATTENDANT YOUNEEDTOTAKESOMEACTIONTO DIMINISHTHEPOWEROFTHATPARTICULARTRIGGER
t
4%#(.)15%3 TOPRACTICE
5SETHISTECHNIQUETOGETRID 3HRINKTHEGOODPICTURETOA POWERFULSMALLIMAGE OFANUNWANTEDEMOTIONAL ,OOKATTHEhTRIGGERvPICTURE THIS RESPONSE ORTODEFUSETHE TIMEWITHTHEPOSITIVEIMAGEINA TRIGGERFORABADHABIT)T LOWERCORNER-AKETHETRIGGER INSTALLSAFRESHSEQUENCEOF PICTUREDISAPPEAR ANDEXPAND MENTALASSOCIATIONS THEPOSITIVEIMAGETOFULLSIZE 4AKEAMENTALPICTUREOFTHE hTRIGGERvSITUATION7HATTRIGGERS THERESPONSE ,ETGOOFTHATPICTURE ANDSEE YOURSELFASYOUWILLBEWHENYOU HAVEOVERCOMETHATPROBLEM -AKETHEPICTUREBRIGHTAND COMPELLING SOYOUGETAGOOD FEELINGASYOULOOKATIT
MAKINGAh3WISSSHvSOUNDTO EMPHASIZETHEEXCHANGE (OLDFORAMOMENT THENBLANK YOURMENTALSCREEN 2EPEATlVETIMESINQUICK SUCCESSION ,OOKATTHETRIGGERPICTUREAGAIN 9OUWILLlNDTHATYOURRESPONSE TOITISWEAKER
#, % ! 2 4 ( % " , / #+ 3
66_ED245_US 66 &+,#&-)#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ,,
31/7/06 4:57:58 pm '(%*%&,(0**0'-fc
$EALINGWITH9OUR)NNER#RITIC -ANYPEOPLEAREHELDBACKFROMREACHINGTHEIRFULL POTENTIALBYANINNERVOICE ALSOKNOWNASTHEhCHATTERBOXv ORhGREMLIN vTHATCONSTANTLYNAGSATTHEM 9OUCANREDUCETHEIMPACTOFTHISVOICE7HEREISITCOMINGFROM -OSTPEOPLELOCATEITINTHEIRHEADS7HATDOESITSAY ANDHOWDO YOUFEELABOUTIT7HATKINDOFIMPACTWOULDITHAVEIF
)TWASCOMINGFROMYOURRIGHTBIGTOEINSTEAD )THADAVERYHIGH PITCHEDVOICE )TWASLOUDER/RQUIETER )TCAMEFROMOUTSIDEYOURBODYALTOGETHER )THADTHEVOICEOFAWELL KNOWNCARTOONCHARACTER )THADAHUMOROUSTONE WITHACHUCKLEINITSVOICE )THADAKINDLY NURTURINGTONE 7HICHONEWORKEDBESTFORYOU(OWDOESITFEELTOREALIZETHAT YOUCANCHANGETHEIMPACTTHATTHEINNERCRITICHASONHOWYOU FEEL!NDWHENWILLTHISBEMOSTUSEFULTOYOU %VERYONEHASAN)NNER#RITIC!LTHOUGHEVERYONEHASAVOICETHATDIMINISHES THEIRCONlDENCEATTIMES HOWMUCHATTENTIONYOUPAYTOYOURNEGATIVEINNER CRITICISENTIRELYUPTOYOUITSWITHINYOURCONTROL
67_ED245_US 67 ,-U;:(*+U9COAU,-
31/7/06 4:57:59 pm ''%*%&,,0).0+*fc
3UMMARY$EALINGWITH0ROBLEMS 4URNINGPROBLEMSOVERANDOVERINYOURHEADCANQUICKLY BECOMECOUNTERPRODUCTIVE MAKINGASITUATIONFEELMORE DIFlCULTTHANITACTUALLYIS4HEKEYTODEALINGWITHPROBLEMS ISTOSTAYFOCUSEDONTHESOLUTION REMAINRELAXEDANDPOSITIVE ANDNOTLETYOURPERSONALGREMLINSTAKECONTROL
0LANOF!CTION
&OCUSON THE3OLUTION
$ONT,ET9OURSELF 'ETINTOA2UT
&OCUSONWHATYOURLIFE WOULDBELIKEIFTHE PROBLEMWERETOBESOLVED
'ETPLENTYOFHEALTHY MOOD BOOSTINGEXERCISETO HELPYOUSTAYPOSITIVE
!SKYOURSELFTHEMIRACLE QUESTIONIFTHE PROBLEMDISAPPEARED TOMORROW HOWWOULD YOUBEABLETOTELL
0LANTHINGSTOLOOK FORWARDTOTHATWILLHELP KEEPYOURMINDOFFTHE PROBLEM
5SEYOURANSWERSTO FOCUSONPOSSIBLESOLUTIONS TOTHEPROBLEM
)NTERRUPTRECURRINGPATTERNS OFTHOUGHTANDACTION BYDOINGSOMETHINGDIFFERENT
#, % ! 2 4 ( % " , / #+ 3
68_ED245_US 68 7O=IIUF&,.U&,/$_dZZ,.
31/7/06 4:58:21 pm '(%*%&,'&0*.0).Wc
69_ED245_US 69 7O=IIUF&,.U&,/$_dZZ,/
!LTER9OUR6IEWPOINT
)SITTHEWAYYOULOOKATTHE PROBLEMTHATMAKESYOU FEELANXIOUS
9%3
3WITCHYOURVIEWPOINTSO THATYOUARELOOKINGATIT FROMTHEPERSPECTIVEOFAN IMPARTIALOBSERVER
9%3
5SETHEh3WISSSHv TECHNIQUETODEFUSE PROBLEMTRIGGERS
9%3
2EDUCEITSPOWEROVERYOU BYCHANGINGTHECHARACTER TONE ORLOCATIONOFITSVOICE
./
$OYOUHAVEPARTICULAR TRIGGERSTHATSPARKA PROBLEMRESPONSE
./ $OYOUHAVEANINNERCRITIC WHOPREVENTSYOUFROM DEALINGWITHPROBLEMS CONlDENTLY ./ 2ATETHEPROBLEMTHAT YOUAREDEALINGWITHON ASCALEOFTOWHERE ISBETTER
!SKYOURSELFWHAT YOUWOULDBEDOING DIFFERENTLYIFTHEPROBLEM WASONENUMBERABOVE THECURRENTRATING
3 5 - - ! 29$ % ! , ) . '7 ) 4 (0 2 / " , % - 3
31/7/06 4:58:23 pm '(%*%&,'&0*.0(*Wc
$EALWITH/THER0EOPLE 3OMETIMESITCANSEEMASIFLIFEWOULDBEPERFECTIFYOU DIDNTHAVETODEALWITHTHEDIFlCULTPEOPLEAROUNDYOU "UTDOTHOSEPEOPLETHINKOFTHEMSELVESASDIFlCULT 6ERYFEWPEOPLEDELIBERATELYSETOUTTOBEAWKWARD
+EEPAN/BJECTIVE6IEW 3OMEONEWITHWHOMYOUHAVEAPROBLEMMAYBEREGARDED ASEASYGOINGBYSOMEONEELSE%QUALLY YOUMAYSOMETIMES APPEARTOBETHEhDIFlCULTvONEWITHOUTREALIZINGIT9OU SHOWDIFFERENTASPECTSOFYOURSELFTOYOURPARTNER YOUR COLLEAGUES YOURCHILDREN ANDYOURFRIENDS7HATTHEY PERCEIVEISTHEIRMENTALIMAGEOFYOU lLTEREDBYPREVIOUS MEMORIES ASSOCIATIONS ANDTHEIROWNBELIEFSABOUTTHE TYPEOFPERSONYOUARE4HISWORKSBOTHWAYSSOTHAT WHENYOUHAVEAPROBLEMWITHSOMEBODY YOUAREREALLY HAVINGAPROBLEMWITHYOURIMAGEOFTHEM
%VERY$ISPUTEHAS4HREE6IEWPOINTS 7HENYOUARELOCKEDINANYKINDOFCONmICTWITHSOMEONE ELSE ITISHARDTOKEEPTHEMENTALmEXIBILITYTOlNDCREATIVE WAYSTORESOLVEIT4HESTRONGERYOUREMOTION THEMORE RIGIDANDSETYOURTHINKINGTENDSTOBECOME4HEKEYTO REMAININGmEXIBLEENOUGHTOGIVEYOURSELFMORECHOICE
70_ED245_US 70 -&U;:(*+U9COAU-&
THINK
3-!24 ,OOKATARECENTDISAGREEMENTFROMEACHOFTHETHREE VIEWPOINTS STARTINGWITHYOUROWN "CAREFULTOLETGOOFANYFEELINGSFROMONEVIEWPOINTBEFORE STEPPINGINTOTHENEXT4OGETTHEBESTOUTOFTHISEXERCISE MARKOUTTHETHREEVIEWPOINTSASSEPARATEPLACESINTHEROOM ANDPHYSICALLYMOVEFROMONETOANOTHER!FTERVIEWINGTHE DISPUTEFROMTHEDETACHEDOVERVIEWPOSITION WHATADVICE WOULDYOUGIVETOTHEhYOUvINTHElRSTVIEWPOINT
#, % ! 2 4 ( % " , / #+ 3
31/7/06 4:58:28 pm ''%*%&,,0).0+/fc
(OWTHE6IEWPOINTS7ORK 4EACHYOURSELFTOSWITCHBETWEENDIFFERENTVIEWPOINTSmEXIBLYIN ORDERTOGAINTHEBROADESTPOSSIBLEVIEWOFANYSITUATION%ACH VIEWPOINTHASITSOWNADVANTAGESANDDISADVANTAGES
!DVANTAGESAND$ISADVANTAGES !$6!.4!'%3
$)3!$6!.4!'%3
9OUROWNPOINTOFVIEW'OODFOR
9OUROWNPOINTOFVIEW#ANLEAD
KNOWINGWHATYOUWANT KNOWINGHOW YOUFEELABOUTTHINGS ANDFORSTANDING YOURGROUNDlRMLY
TOSELlSHNESSORARROGANCEYOUMAY LACKAWARENESSOFHOWYOUAPPEAR AND USEOTHERSFORYOUROWNENDS
4HEOTHERPERSONSPOINTOFVIEW
4HEOTHERPERSONSPOINTOFVIEW
'OODFORSEEINGCLEARLYWHATTHEOTHER PERSONWANTS ANDFOREMPATHYMAY HELPYOUTOSEEHOWYOUAPPEAR TOTHEM
#ANLEADTOPASSIVEBEHAVIOR OR IN EXTREMECASES AMARTYREDAPPROACHIN WHICHYOUSEEOTHERSVIEWPOINTSSO CLEARLYTHATYOUALWAYSPUTTHEMlRST
!DETACHEDOVERVIEW'OODFOR LOOKINGATTHINGSOBJECTIVELY CALMING DOWN SEEINGTHEINTERACTIONASAWHOLE SYSTEM ANDNOTINGITSWIDERCONSEQUENCE
!DETACHEDOVERVIEW,ACKING
UNDERSTANDINGOFHOWTHEPARTICIPANTS INTHESITUATIONFEEL4HISVIEWPOINTCAN LEADYOUTOCOMEACROSSASCOLD
ABOUTYOURRESPONSEISTOPRACTICELOOKINGATTHECONmICT FROMTHREEDIFFERENTVIEWPOINTSYOUROWN THEOTHER PERSONS ANDADETACHEDOVERVIEW
"RING7ISDOMTO#ONmICTS 'ETTINGSTUCKINANYONEOFTHESETHREEPOSITIONS SOTHAT YOUONLYSEETHESITUATIONFROMONEPOINTOFVIEW HAS DISADVANTAGES7ISDOMCOMESFROMBEINGABLETOMOVE FREELYBETWEENTHEVIEWPOINTS ANDINBEINGABLETOLETGO OFTHEFEELINGSARISINGFROMONEVIEWPOINTBEFOREMOVING TOANOTHER SOYOUCANSEETHESITUATIONWITHFRESHEYES
71_ED245_US 71 -'U;:(*+U9COAU-'
$ % ! ,7 ) 4 (/4 ( % 20 % / 0 , %
31/7/06 4:58:29 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0&&fc
$EALWITH#RITICISM (OWDOYOURESPONDTOCRITICALCOMMENTS$OYOUTAKE THEMTOHEART ORSTOPTHEMATARMSLENGTHANDEXAMINE THEMTOSEEIFTHEYARETRUE(OWABOUTCOMPLIMENTS $OYOUTREATTHEMINTHESAMEWAY ORDIFFERENTLY
4REAT#RITICISMAS&EEDBACK )TISVERYCOMMONFORPEOPLETOTAKECRITICISMIMMEDIATELY TOHEART WHETHERITISWELLFOUNDEDORNOT BUTTOHOLD COMPLIMENTSATADISTANCEUNTILTHEYHAVEANALYZEDTHEM !MORESUCCESSFULRECIPEFORHAPPINESSISTODOTHE OPPOSITETOACCEPTCOMPLIMENTSFREELYWHILESUBJECTING CRITICISMSTOCAREFULSCRUTINY4OEXTRACTTHEUSEFULLEARNING FROMACRITICALREMARK FOLLOWTHISSIMPLETWO STEPPROCESS s -ENTALLYDETACHYOURSELFFROMTHEEMOTIONALIMPACTOF THECRITICISM)MAGINEYOUARERISINGABOVETHEPERSON MAKINGTHECRITICISMANDLOOKINGDOWNATTHEM s !SKYOURSELFh7HATDO)NEEDTOLEARNFROMTHISv 9OUMAYlNDTHATYOULEARNASMUCHABOUTTHEPERSON OFFERINGTHECRITICISMASYOUDOABOUTYOURSELF 3TAY0OSITIVE!MATUREATTITUDETOCRITICISMTHATITISINVALUABLEFEEDBACKIS AUSEFULTOOLINLIFE)NSTEADOFBECOMINGDEFENSIVEWHENCRITICIZED AIMTOREMAIN OPENTOCOMMENT ANDTOANALYZEITCALMLY
72_ED245_US 72 -(U;:(*+U9COAU-(
31/7/06 4:58:31 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0&+fc
"E!WAREOF0ROJECTION h0ROJECTIONvISATHERAPYTERMTHATDESCRIBESTHEPERCEPTION OFYOUROWNFEELINGSINANOTHERPERSON WITHOUTTHE REALIZATIONTHATYOURINTERPRETATIONISREALLYABOUTYOU !SSUMEFORAMOMENTTHATTHEREASON YOUAREABLETORECOGNIZEAQUALITYYOU DISLIKEINSOMEONEELSEISBECAUSEYOU HAVESOMEOFTHATQUALITYYOURSELF4HIS IDEAWORKSBOTHWAYSEVENIFYOU DONTREALIZEIT ITMEANSTHATYOUALSO HAVEATLEASTTRACESOFTHEQUALITIESTHAT YOUADMIREINOTHERPEOPLE
$IFlCULT PEOPLEMAKE THEBEST TEACHERS
5SE0ROBLEMATIC0EOPLEAS0RACTICE %VERYONE NOMATTERHOWOBNOXIOUSTHEYSEEM ISACTINGFROMA POSITIVEINTENTIONTOWARDTHEMSELVES6IEWINGhDIFlCULTvPEOPLE FROMTHISPERSPECTIVEMAKESITEASIERTOUNDERSTANDTHEM4AKETHIS PRINCIPLEONESTEPFURTHERANDREALIZETHATTHEYAREGIVINGYOUAN OPPORTUNITYTOLEARN3OMEOFTHEMOSTVALUABLELESSONSYOUHAVE LEARNEDWILLHAVECOMEFROMLEARNINGTOHANDLEDIFlCULTPEOPLE PERHAPSAGRUMPYCOLLEAGUEWHOUNKNOWINGLYGAVEYOUPRACTICE INDRAWINGAPERSONOUTOFTHEMSELVES4RYRUNNINGTHROUGHTHIS EXERCISEAFEWTIMES USINGADIFFERENTPERSONASYOUREXAMPLE EACHTIME TOINCREASEYOURUNDERSTANDING 4HINKOFAPERSONWHODOESSOMETHINGTHATIRRITATESYOU OR BEHAVESINAWAYTHATYOUDONTLIKE 7HATISTHEPOSITIVEINTENTIONBEHINDTHEIRBEHAVIOR3EE YOURSELFBRIEmYTHOUGHTHEIREYES7HATDOYOULEARNFROMTHIS DIFFERENTVIEWPOINT )FTHATPERSONSBEHAVIORHADAPOSITIVEINTENTIONTOWARDYOU BEHINDIT WHATWOULDTHATPOSITIVEINTENTIONBE7HAT POSITIVELESSONSDOYOUNEEDTOLEARNFROMYOURINTERACTION WITHTHATPERSON ! SKYOURSELFh(OWAM)LIKETHATPERSON7HENDO)BEHAVE LIKETHATv
73_ED245_US 73 -)U;:(*+U9COAU-)
$ % ! ,7 ) 4 (#2 ) 4 ) #) 3 -
31/7/06 4:58:32 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0&-fc
#REATE THE6ISION 9OU7ANT
.OWTHATYOUARECLEARABOUTYOURVALUESAND HAVELOOSENEDANYLIMITINGBELIEFS YOUCAN lRMUPYOURGOALSANDBRINGTHEMTOLIFEIN AWAYTHATWILLENLISTYOURUNCONSCIOUSMIND TOHELPMAKEITHAPPEN)NSTALLINGAVIBRANT IMAGEOFYOURGOALINTOYOURFUTUREWILL TURBOCHARGEYOURMOTIVATIONANDKEEPYOU FOCUSEDONDOINGWHATEVERITTAKESTOACHIEVE THEM4HISSECTIONGUIDESYOUTHROUGH s7HYSETTINGGOALSISIMPORTANT s7HATWORKSINGOAL SETTING s4HElVECONDITIONSOFSUCCESSFULGOALS s(OWTOMAKEYOURGOALCOMPELLING s(OWTOINSTALLGOALSINTOYOURFUTURE
74_ED245_US 74 -*U;:(*+U9COAU-*
31/7/06 4:58:39 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0')fc
75_ED245_US 75 -+U;:(*+U9COAU-+
31/7/06 4:58:40 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0'.fc
3ET9OUR'OALS 7ITHOUTGOALSYOUWOULDJUSTBEDRIFTINGAIMLESSLY AT THEMERCYOFWHATEVEREVENTSCOMEALONGINYOURLIFE 9OUNEEDTOHAVEACLEARIDEAABOUTWHEREYOUWANTTO BEINORDERTOTAKETHEACTIONNEEDEDTOGETTHERE
5SE'OALSTO'IVE9OU$IRECTION "YCONTRAST WHENYOUKNOWWHATYOURGOALSARE YOU KNOWTHEPATHYOUHAVETOFOLLOWTOGETTHEREANDYOU HAVESOMETHINGTOAIMAT SOYOUCANMAKECORRECTIONS IFYOUGETBLOWNOFFCOURSE!SENSEOFPURPOSEISA FUNDAMENTALHUMANNEED7ITHOUTPURPOSEORMEANINGIN YOURLIFE YOUBECOMEUNHAPPYASYOUWILLKNOWIFYOU HAVESPENTANYLENGTHOF ,OOKTOTHE&UTURE TIMEINANUNFULlLLINGJOB 7ITHGOALS YOUBECOME MOREmEXIBLEANDRESILIENT !SSESSWHEREYOUARENOW ANDBETTERABLETOCOPE WITHCHANGINGCONDITIONSAS YOUCONTINUALLYDEVELOP
&REE-ENTAL%NERGY )FYOUlNDITHARDTOTHINK OFACTIVITIESTHATWOULDBE ENJOYABLE YOUNEEDTOFREE SOMEMENTALENERGY#UT OUTACTIVITIESTHATMAYBE PLEASURABLE BUTDONT OFFERYOUENJOYMENT #UTTINGDOWNONTELEVISION WATCHINGWOULDBEAGOOD START3WITCHOFFASOAP OPERAYOUWATCHREGULARLY ANDYOULLALREADYHAVE FREEDUPlVEHOURSAWEEK THATYOUCOULDSPEND ENRICHINGYOURRELATIONSHIPS WITHREALPEOPLE
76_ED245_US 76 -,U;:(*+U9COAU-,
&IXONYOURLONG TERMGOALS OVERASETTIMEPERIOD
(ALFWAYTHROUGHTHEPERIODYOU HAVESET ASSESSYOURPROGRESS
!DJUSTYOURMEDIUM TERMGOALS IFNECESSARY&IXONYOURNEXTSET OFLONG TERMGOALS
#2 % !4 % 4 ( % 6 ) 3 ) / .9/ 57! . 4
31/7/06 4:58:41 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0(&fc
#HOOSE%NJOYMENTOVER0LEASURE !FTEREXTENSIVERESEARCH THEPSYCHOLOGIST-IHALY#SIKSZENTMIHALYI CONCLUDEDTHATWEAREHAPPIESTINhmOWvSTATES INWHICHWEARE COMPLETELYABSORBEDINWHATWEAREDOING#HARACTERISTICOFA mOWSTATEISTHEFOCUSTHATCOMESFROMHAVINGADElNEDGOAL4HE STRETCHWElNDINGOINGFORANAMBITIOUSGOALGIVESUSENJOYMENT ANDENJOYMENTISDIFFERENTFROMPLEASURE WHICHISMERELYTHE FEELINGOFCONTENTMENTWEGETWHENEVERWESATISFYBIOLOGICALOR SOCIALLYCONDITIONEDEXPECTATIONSWITHALCOHOL DRUGS ORMATERIAL POSSESSIONS0LEASURELEAVESUSUNCHANGEDENJOYMENTISASIGN THATWEAREGROWINGANDDEVELOPING3OMEEXAMPLESWOULDBE
-AKINGASUCCESSOFACRUCIALPRESENTATION 4RAININGFORANDRUNNINGAMARATHON 2EADINGANINSPIRATIONALBOOKTHATCHANGESYOURPOINTOFVIEW "OOST9OUR3ELF %STEEM !PSYCHOLOGYSTUDYAT7ASHINGTON5NIVERSITYIN3T,OUIS FOUNDTHATPEOPLESSELF ESTEEMVARIESACCORDINGTO WHETHERONATYPICALDAYTHEYTHINKMOSTLYABOUTTHEPAST THEPRESENT ORTHEFUTURE0EOPLEWITHHIGHSELF ESTEEM WHOFEELGOODMOSTOFTHETIMEFOCUSMAINLYONPOSITIVE EVENTSINTHEFUTURE WHILEPEOPLEWITHLOWSELF ESTEEM ANDALOTOFNEGATIVEFEELINGSTHINKMOREABOUTUNPLEASANT EVENTSINTHEPAST)FYOUFEELYOUHAVELEARNEDFROMPAST EVENTS YOUWILLlNDITEASIERTOMOVEONANDNOTDWELLON ASPECTSTHATDIDNTWORKANDWHICHYOUNOWCANNOT CHANGE,EARNINGFROMLIFEASYOUGOISANEFFECTIVEWAYTO AVOIDRETROSPECTIVEREGRETSABOUThWHATMIGHTHAVEBEENv
4)0 4RYOUTNEW EXCITINGEXPERIENCESTOGETIDEAS ANDBROADENYOURHORIZONS3OMETIMESYOUDONT KNOWWHATYOUWANTUNTILYOUVETRIEDIT
77_ED245_US 77 --U;:(*+U9COAU--
3 % 49/ 5 2' /! , 3
31/7/06 4:58:42 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0((fc
-AKE'OAL 3ETTING7ORK #HANGINGYOURHABITSISNOTEASYYEARSOFPRACTICEWILL HAVEEMBEDDEDTHEMINTOYOURNEURALCIRCUITRY)NORDER TOOVERCOMETHEINERTIATHATWEAREALLFAMILIARWITH ITS ESSENTIALTOHAVEACLEARVISIONOFWHEREYOUWANTTOBE
%NGAGE9OUR5NCONSCIOUS-IND 7HENYOUHAVEAVISIONTHATYOUCANSEE HEAR ANDFEEL IT ENGAGESYOUONMORETHANJUSTANINTELLECTUALLEVEL)TGIVES YOUTHEEMOTIONALMOTIVATIONYOUWILLNEEDTOGETTHROUGH SETBACKSANDOVERCOMEINERTIA3ETTINGAGOALINTHERIGHT WAYOFFERSATEMPLATEORhATTRACTORvFORYOURUNCONSCIOUS MIND WHICHSETSUPTHEATTENTIONMECHANISMSINYOUR BRAINTONOTICETHEPEOPLEANDOPPORTUNITIESTHATCANHELP YOUGETCLOSERTOWHEREYOUWANTTOBE)TALSOALLOWSYOU TOEVALUATETHECHANGESINYOURSURROUNDINGSSOTHATYOU WILLBEAWAREOFWHETHERYOUAREGETTINGCLOSERTOYOUR DESIREDOUTCOME ORMOVINGFARTHERAWAYFROMIT
$ISTINGUISHBETWEEN'OALSAND&EELINGS h)WANTTOBEHAPPYvISNOTAGOAL9OUCANBEHAPPYRIGHT NOW FORATLEASTASHORTWHILE BYBRINGINGTOMINDA HAPPYTIMEINYOURLIFE ORAPERSONYOULIKE4HISHAPPENS INSTANTLYANDISACCOMPLISHEDBYYOURINTERNALRESPONSETO HAPPYORPOSITIVETHOUGHTS'OALS BYCONTRAST INVOLVE CHANGESINTHEEXTERNALWORLDAROUNDYOUYOUACTUALLY HAVETOMAKESOMETHINGHAPPENTOACHIEVEMOSTGOALS ANDTHISWILLTAKETIME
78_ED245_US 78 -.U;:(*+U9COAU-.
&EELINGSVERSUS'OALS &%%,).'/26!,5%SUCHAS hHAPPINESSv
'/!,SUCHAShPROMOTED BYTHEENDOFTHISYEARv
6AGUE
3PECIlC
9OUCANHAVEITNOW
)TWILLTAKETIMETOACHIEVE
.OSTEPSORPLANNINGREQUIRED
3TEPSARENEEDEDTOGETTHERE
!BSTRACT
-EASURABLE
#2 % !4 % 4 ( % 6 ) 3 ) / .9/ 57! . 4
31/7/06 4:58:44 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0()fc
%NVISAGING9OUR'OALS )TMAYBETHATYOUHAVEKNOWNFORALONGTIMEWHATYOUR GOALSARE!LTERNATIVELY YOUMAYHAVESTARTEDWITHONLYA VAGUENOTIONTHATYOUWANTTHINGSTOBEDIFFERENTFROMHOW THEYHAVEBEENUPTONOW )FYOURGOALSARENOTYETASCLEARASYOUWOULDLIKETHEMTOBE HEREARESOMEWAYSOFGETTINGSTARTED
4ITLETHREESHEETSOFPAPERWITHh4HINGSTHAT)WANTMOREOF v h4HINGSTHAT)WANTTOKEEPASTHEYARE vANDh4HINGSTHAT) WANTLESSOFv$IVIDEEACHSHEETINTOTWOCOLUMNSANDWRITE ASMANYENTRIESASYOUCANINTHELEFT HANDCOLUMN WITHYOUR REASONSFOREACHENTRYINTHERIGHT HANDCOLUMN 4HINKABOUTPEOPLEYOUADMIRE7HATISITTHATYOUADMIRE (OWCOULDYOUBEMORELIKETHEM !FEELINGCANBEASTARTINGPOINTFORDRAWINGUPYOURGOALS)F YOUWANTTOBEHAPPIER WHATACHIEVABLECHANGESWOULDMAKE ITEASYFORYOUTOBEHAPPY )MAGESMAYBEEASIERTOWORKWITHTHANWORDS5SEMAGAZINE PICTURESTHATAPPEALTOYOUTOCREATEACOLLAGEREPRESENTING YOURGOAL 3AMPLE,IST7RITINGDOWNWHATYOUWANTMOREOF ANDWHYYOUWANTIT WILL HELPYOUTOCONSOLIDATEYOURGOALS
79_ED245_US 79 -/U;:(*+U9COAU-/
F 4HINGS)WANTMOREO ND PE OS ET s 3PARETIM IDS WITHMYK s 0LAYINGGOLF s #HALLENGINGWORK PROJECTS
7HY GFOR s 4HEYAREONLYYOUN E ASHORTTIM s %XERCISEANDFUN E s 4OSHOWWHAT)HAV FER OF TO
- ! + %' /! , 3 % 4 4 ) . ' 7 / 2 +
31/7/06 4:58:45 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0(+fc
&REE5P9OUR%NERGYBY$ECLUTTERING 7EAREALLAFFECTEDBYOURSURROUNDINGSTOSOMEEXTENT AND THEENVIRONMENTWECREATEFOROURSELVESMIRRORSOURINNER STATEOFMIND!CLUTTEREDSPACEWILLDRAINYOURENERGY #LEARINGSUPERmUOUSCLUTTERISONEEASY WAYTOGIVEYOURENERGYABOOSTANDTO STARTFREEINGYOURSELFFROMPAST BAGGAGESOYOUCANLOOKTOTHEFUTURE
3TARTWITHTHESMALLSTUFF4OGET
$ECLUTTERING ISEASYONCE YOUGET STARTED
PASTTHEFEELINGOFBEING OVERWHELMED STARTWITHYOURJUNK DRAWER)TWILLINSPIREYOUTOMOVE ONTOTHEBIGGERSTUFF #LEAROUTANYTHINGNOTUSEDORLOVED5NDERNORMAL CIRCUMSTANCES IFYOUHAVENOTUSEDANITEMINTHEPASTYEAR THENYOUWILLNOTUSEITAGAIN 3ETYOURSELFATIMELIMIT)FYOUHAVESOMETHINGTHATIS UNlNISHEDORNEEDINGREPAIR SETYOURSELFAPERIODOFTIMETO GETITlXED)FBYTHENITSSTILLUNlNISHED ITHASTOGO 2ECYCLEITEMSTHATAREhTOOGOODTOTHROWOUTv)TISNOTEASY FORMOSTPEOPLETOJUSTTHROWSOMETHINGAWAYSORECYCLEIT TOFRIENDS SCHOOLS ORCHARITIESWHOWILLACTUALLYUSEIT h /NEIN ONEOUTv/NCEYOUHAVECLEARED MAINTAINTHAT CLUTTER FREESTATEWITHARULETHATYOUCLEARSPACEFORWHATEVER YOUBRINGINTOYOURHOMEBYCLEARINGOUTSOMETHINGELSE 'ETSTARTED4HEMOMENTYOUSTART YOUWILLFEELLIGHTERAND EMPOWEREDTOCONTINUE/THERPEOPLEAROUNDYOUWILLBE MOTIVATEDTOCLEARTHEIRCLUTTER9OURHOMEORWORKSPACEWILL FEELTHEBENElTSANDAPPEARFULLOFPOSITIVEENERGY
4)0 3ETYOURGOALSATTHERIGHTLEVEL)FYOUNEVER
ACHIEVEANYOFTHEM YOURSIGHTSARESETTOOHIGHIFYOU ALWAYSACHIEVEALLOFTHEM THEYARESETTOOLOW
80_ED245_US 80 .&U;:(*+U9COAU.&
#2 % !4 % 4 ( % 6 ) 3 ) / .9/ 57! . 4
31/7/06 4:58:46 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0(-fc
$ISTINGUISHBETWEENh.EEDvANDh7ANTv 0HILOSOPHIESSUCHAS"UDDHISMTALKABOUTTHENEEDFOR NON ATTACHMENTTOTHERESULTSYOUGET SOTHATYOUDONT GETUPSETIFTHINGSDONOTWORKOUTTHEWAYYOUWANTED )NFACT BEINGATTACHEDTOAGOALNEEDINGITTOHAPPEN ARISESWHENYOUHAVEAMENTALIMAGEOFTHEGOAL BUTALSO ANOTHERMENTALIMAGE OFNOTREACHINGTHEGOAL WHICHIS ATLEASTASSTRONG9OUMAYNOTBECONSCIOUSLYAWAREOF THENEGATIVEIMAGEBUTITISALWAYSTHERE4HEhAWAY FROMvMOTIVATIONTHATTHISCREATESWILLGETINTHEWAYOF ACHIEVINGTHEGOAL"YCONTRAST WHENYOUWANTYOURGOAL TOHAPPENBUTYOUWILLBECOMPOSEDIFITDOESNOT YOU ONLYHAVEAPOSITIVEMENTALIMAGE9OURMOTIVATIONWILLBE hTOWARD vWHICHISMOREDIRECTED ANDLESSSTRESSFUL MINUTE
&)8
5SE3-!24'OALS WITH#ARE )FYOUAREINBUSINESSYOUWILL PROBABLYHAVECOMEACROSSTHE 3-!24APPROACH WHICHSTATES THATGOALSSHOULDBE3PECIlC -EASURABLE !CHIEVABLE 2EALISTIC AND4IMED4HESEAREALLNECESSARY CRITERIAFORSUCCESS BUTTHEYLEAVE OUTANIMPORTANTFACTORDOYOU CAREWHETHERYOUACHIEVETHE GOAL)NTHEENVIRONMENTWHERE THE3-!24APPROACHORIGINATED THEREWASNOSHORTAGEOFhAWAY FROMvMOTIVATION)FYOUDIDNOT CARRYOUTYOURTASKS YOUWOULDBE lRED7HENYOUARESETTINGGOALS FORYOURSELF YOUNEEDANAPPROACH THATENGAGESYOURUNCONSCIOUS MINDANDHARNESSESTHEPOWEROF hTOWARDvMOTIVATION
81_ED245_US 81 .'U;:(*+U9COAU.'
)NASITUATIONIN WHICHYOUNEEDTO ASSESSMOTIVATION FASTBEFOREYOUACT MAKEAQUICKCHECK 9OUCANESTABLISHTHAT YOUAREUSINGTHE RIGHThTOWARDvn MOTIVATIONBYASKING YOURSELF L
7HATWILLTHISGOAL
L
7ILL)LOSEANYTHINGIF
GAINFORME )REACHMYGOAL 9OURGAINSSHOULDBE GREATERTHANYOUR LOSSES ANDSHOULDBE PLACEDlRMLYINTHE FUTURE
- ! + %' /! , 3 % 4 4 ) . ' 7 / 2 +
31/7/06 4:58:48 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0(/fc
&INDA2OUTETO3UCCESSFUL'OALS "YNOWYOUWILLHAVESOMEGOALSINMIND9OUMAYHAVE HADDElNEDOUTCOMESALLALONGIFNOT THEYWILLHAVE BECOMECLEARERASYOUWORKEDONYOURVALUESORWORKED THROUGHTHEENVISAGINGPROCESSONTHEPREVIOUSPAGES
#REATEA#HECKLIST 4HEREAREMANYDIFFERENTFORMULASFORGOAL SETTING CHECKLISTS/NEOFTHEMOSTEFFECTIVE BOTHFORPRECISION ANDFORENGAGINGYOUREMOTIONALCOMMITMENT ISTHE FORMULAKNOWNASTHE0/7%2PROCESS'OTHROUGHTHE LETTERSOFTHEWORDh0OWERvSTEPBYSTEP ASDESCRIBEDON THEFOLLOWINGPAGES9OUARElNDINGOUTIFYOURGOALWILL MEETTHECRITERIATHATTELLYOUTHATITISACHIEVABLE
0/7%2THE+EYWORDS 0
0OSITIVETHINKING
/
/WNYOURGOAL
7
SPECIFY7HATAND7HEN
%
CONSIDERALLTHE%FFECTS
2
ENSURETHATTHE2OUTEISKNOWNANDFEASIBLE
00OSITIVE4HINKING 4HISISABOUTTHENEEDTOBECAREFULWITHTHEWORDSYOU USEWHENYOUWRITEYOURGOALDOWN ANDEVENWHENYOU THINKTOYOURSELFABOUTIT3ETTINGAGOALGIVESYOUR UNCONSCIOUSATARGETTOWORKTOWARD4HISACTSASASETOF INSTRUCTIONSFORDECIDINGWHATASPECTSOFYOURENVIRONMENT AREWORTHGIVINGATTENTIONTOWHICHEVENTS THINGS AND PEOPLEYOUWILLDECIDETONOTICEBECAUSETHEYCOULDHELP YOUTOREACHYOURGOAL ANDWHICHWILLNOTMAKEITONTO YOURRADARBECAUSETHEYAREIRRELEVANT2EMEMBERTHATTHE UNCONSCIOUSDOESNOTRECOGNIZEANEGATIVE3OIFYOUSTATE YOURGOALASh)DONTWANTTOBEINTHISUNFULlLLINGJOBA YEARFROMNOW vTHEMENTALIMAGEYOUHAVEFROMTHIS WORDINGISSTILLOFTHECURRENT UNFULlLLINGJOB
82_ED245_US 82 .(U;:(*+U9COAU.(
#2 % !4 % 4 ( % 6 ) 3 ) / .9/ 57! . 4
31/7/06 4:58:49 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0)'fc
'ETTHE*OB$ONE
2ELEASE9OUR0OWER!CLEARVISION
OFYOURGOALSISTHEKEYTOACCESSING -AKINGSUREYOUKEEPTHE THEFULLENERGYOFYOURINTERNALDRIVE WORDhNOTvOUTOFYOUR GOALSTATEMENTISNOT ENOUGHBYITSELF9OURCOULDRESTATEYOURGOALASh)WANTTO BEOUTOFTHISJOBINAYEARv4HISTAKEShNOTvOUTOFTHE EQUATION BUTITISSTILLASTATEMENTOFWHATYOUWANTTO GETAWAYFROM)TISINCOMPLETE BECAUSEITSAYSNOTHING ABOUTWHATYOUWANTTOMOVETOWARD9OURUNCONSCIOUSIS APRECISEINSTRUMENTUSUALLYITWILLDOITSBESTTOFULlLL EXACTLYWHATYOUASKOFITBUTNOMORE)FINAYEARYOU AREUNEMPLOYED WHATEVERYOUARECONSCIOUSLYTHINKING YOURUNCONSCIOUSWILLREGARDTHERESULTASAJOBCOMPLETED BECAUSEITHASGIVENYOUEXACTLYWHATYOUASKED9OUNEED TOMODIFYYOURGOALSTATEMENTTOENSURETHATYOUR UNCONSCIOUSUNDERSTANDSYOURENDAIM h)NAYEAR )WANTTOBEINAJOBTHATPAYSBETTER ISMORE ENJOYABLE ANDHASBETTERPROSPECTSv 7HILETHISISNOTYETSPECIlCENOUGHTOBEAWELL FORMEDGOALSTATEMENT ATLEASTITISNOWPOINTINGYOUIN THERIGHTDIRECTIONFORACTION
83_ED245_US 83 .)U;:(*+U9COAU.)
& ) . $!2 / 5 4 %4 /3 5 ##% 3 3 & 5 ,' /! , 3
31/7/06 4:58:51 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0)+fc
//WN9OUR'OAL 7HOSEGOALISIT9OUWILLONLYBETRULYENGAGEDWITHITIFIT ISYOURS)FYOUARETRYINGTOLIVEUPTOSOMEONEELSESIDEA OFWHOYOUSHOULDBE YOUAREBOUNDTOHAVESOME UNCONSCIOUSRESISTANCEUNLESSYOURVISIONFORYOURSELF EXACTLYCOINCIDESWITHTHEIRS/WNERSHIPISALSOABOUT BEINGABLETOBRINGTHEGOALABOUTBYYOUROWNACTIONS )TWOULDBEPOINTLESSTOSEThWINNINGTHELOTTERYv ASAGOAL BECAUSEONCEYOUHAVEBOUGHTATICKET THE OUTCOMEISENTIRELYOUTOFYOURHANDS7HATANSWERSDO YOUGETTOTHESEQUESTIONS s 7HATCAN)DOTOBRINGTHISGOALABOUTBYMYOWN ACTIONS s 7HATCAN)DOTOINmUENCETHEOUTCOME s 7HATDO)NEEDTODOTOACHIEVETHISGOAL
73PECIFY7HATAND7HEN .OWYOUNEEDTOMAKESUREYOURGOALISEXPRESSED PRECISELY BECAUSEWHATEVERYOUASKFORISEXACTLYWHAT YOURUNCONSCIOUSMINDWILLWORKTOPROVIDEFORYOU$ElNE THEGOALSOTHATBOTHYOURINTELLECTANDYOURUNCONSCIOUS MINDKNOWEXACTLYWHATYOUWANTANDBEGINTOWORK COOPERATIVELYTOGETITFORYOU s -AKESURETHEGOALISQUANTIlABLE s 7HATWILLBEDIFFERENTWHENYOUHAVEYOURGOAL 4AKINGMONEYASANEXAMPLE h)WANTTOBERICHERvISNOTA WELL FORMEDGOAL(OWMUCHRICHER7HATFORMWILLTHAT WEALTHBEIN)FYOURGOALISTOHAVEACERTAININCOME IS THATAFTERTAXESORBEFORE)FYOURGOALISTOBUYANEW HOUSE WHEREWILLTHATHOUSEBE(OWMANYROOMS7HAT CRITERIAWILLTHELOCATIONHAVETOSATISFY7RITEALLTHESE POINTSDOWN4HENMAKEASENSORYIMAGEOFYOURGOAL )NYOURIMAGINATION PUT YOURSELFINTHESITUATIONOF "ECAREFULWHATYOU HAVINGTHEGOAL3EEIT WISHFOR THROUGHYOUROWNEYES AS VIVIDLYASYOUCAN
84_ED245_US 84 .*U;:(*+U9COAU.*
i w 4RADITIONAL#HINESESAYING
#2 % !4 % 4 ( % 6 ) 3 ) / .9/ 57! . 4
31/7/06 4:58:52 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0)-fc
-AKESURETHATYOUHAVEDETAILEDANDSATISFACTORYANSWERS TOALLOFTHEFOLLOWINGQUESTIONS ANDTHATYOUHAVEACLEAR PICTUREOFYOURGOALINYOURMINDS EYE&ILLINCOLORS SOUNDS AND SCENTSASYOUGO 4HEMORE s 7HEREAREYOU DISTINCTA s 7HOELSEISTHERE GOALIS THE s 7HATAREYOUDOING SIMPLERITWILL s 7HATDOYOUSEE HEAR FEEL BETOACHIEVE TASTE ANDSMELLNOWTHATYOU HAVEYOURGOAL 4HISDETAILEDVISUALIZATIONPERFORMSTHREEFUNCTIONS)T BRINGSTHEMENTALIMAGEOFYOURGOALTOLIFEINAWAYTHAT WORDSONTHEIROWNNEVERCOULD SOYOUBEGINTOGETTHE EMOTIONALRESPONSETHATISESSENTIALFORMOTIVATION)TGIVES YOURUNCONSCIOUSMINDASENSORY RICHTEMPLATE SOTHATIT HASAVERYDElNITETARGETTOAIMAT!NDITGIVESYOU INFORMATIONABOUTWHATLIFEWILLBELIKEWHENYOUHAVE ACHIEVEDYOURGOAL SOTHATYOUCANMAKEANYADJUSTMENTS YOUNEEDTOMAKESURETHATTHISISWHATYOUREALLYWANT
w
85_ED245_US 85 .+U;:(*+U9COAU.+
t
4%#(.)15%3 TOPRACTICE
!SYOUWORKTOWARDYOUR GOAL USETHISEXERCISE REGULARLYTOCHECKYOUR PROGRESS %VERYGOALNEEDSANhACHIEVE BYvDATE)FYOUDONOTSETA DATE YOURGOALWILLALWAYS REMAININTHEFUTURE 3ETATARGETDATEFORYOURGOAL #HOOSESEVERALDATESBETWEEN NOWANDTHEDATEYOUHAVESET
ANDWRITETHEMINYOURPLANNER /NEACHOFTHESESTAGEDDATES ASKYOURSELFWHATYOUHAVEDONE TOGETCLOSERTOYOURGOAL AND WRITEDOWNWHATYOUHAVE ALREADYACHIEVED )FYOUlNDTHATYOUAREHITTING THESETDATESWITHOUTMAKING PROGRESS MAKEADETAILEDCHECK OFYOURMOTIVATIONYOUMAYBE SABOTAGINGYOUROWNPROGRESS
& ) . $!2 / 5 4 %4 /3 5 ##% 3 3 & 5 ,' /! , 3
31/7/06 4:58:53 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0)/fc
%#ONSIDER!LLTHE%FFECTS !LTHOUGHYOURGOALMAYBEABOUTAPARTICULARAREAOFYOUR LIFE ITWILLAFFECTOTHERAREAS#ONSIDERTHECONSEQUENCES OFACHIEVINGYOURGOALFOREVERYOTHERAREAOFYOURLIFE WHENYOUHAVE YOUCANBESUREYOUREALLYWANTIT 7HATWILLITCOSTYOUTOACHIEVETHEGOAL3OMETIMES THEREARECOSTSTOACHIEVINGAGOAL INTERMSOFTIME EFFORT ORWHATYOUWILLHAVETOGIVEUP!SKTHESEQUESTIONSTO MAKESUREYOURGOALISWORTHTHESACRIlCES s 7HATWILLHAPPENWHEN)HAVEIT s 7HATWONTHAPPENWHEN)HAVEIT s !RETHEREANYDOWNSIDESTOACHIEVINGIT HATARETHEWIDEREFFECTSOFACHIEVINGYOURGOAL 7 !NYSIGNIlCANTGOALWILLHAVEANIMPACTONTHEBALANCEOF YOURLIFETHINKTHISTHROUGHNOWTOAVOIDUNFORESEEN CONSEQUENCESLATER s (OWWILLTHISGOALAFFECTTHEPEOPLE)CAREABOUT s (OWWILLTHISGOALAFFECTTHEWIDERCOMMUNITIESOF WHICH)AMAPART
#!3%STUDY&INDINGA,IFE"ALANCE +ARLWASTOTALLYFOCUSEDONBUILDING HISCELLPHONERETAILBUSINESS SETTINGAGOALTOBECOMEA MILLIONAIREBEFOREHEWAS(E SUCCEEDEDBUTHEWORKEDSUCH LONGHOURSTOACHIEVEITTHATHIS RELATIONSHIPWASINTROUBLE ANDHE WASINDANGEROFBURNINGOUT7HEN ACHECKUPREVEALEDAHEARTMURMUR HERELUCTANTLYBEGANTODELEGATE SOMEOFHISWORKLOADANDSET ASIDESOMETIMEFOREXERCISE4OHIS SURPRISE EVENWITHHISNEWWORK
86_ED245_US 86 .,U;:(*+U9COAU.,
HABITS HISBUSINESSCONTINUEDTO GROW ALTHOUGHATAMOREMODERATE ANDSUSTAINABLEPACE s)NBALANCINGHISLIFEBETTER +ARL LEARNEDTOENJOYLIFEAND SUFFERINGLESSFROMSTRESS WAS EASIERTOBEAROUND!LTHOUGHHIS RELATIONSHIPDIDNOTSURVIVE HIS QUALITYOFLIFEDIDIMPROVE s(EFOUNDHISINCREASEDMENTAL ALERTNESSHELPEDHIMTOCOMEUP WITHMOREORIGINALBUSINESSIDEAS
#2 % !4 % 4 ( % 6 ) 3 ) / .9/ 57! . 4
31/7/06 4:58:55 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0*'fc
,OOKINGAHEADTO9OUR'OAL ()'()-0!#4
.%'!4)6%)-0!#4
!NTICIPATINGHOWTHEGOALWILL FEELWHENYOUACHIEVEIT L,OOKINGREALISTICALLYATANY DISADVANTAGESITMAYHAVE L#HECKINGYOURUNCONSCIOUSFOR ANYNEGATIVESIGNALS L
!SSUMINGTHATONCEYOUHAVETHE GOAL LIFEWILLBEPERFECT L#ONCENTRATINGPURELYONTHE ADVANTAGESOFTHEGOAL L)GNORINGANYDOUBTSCOMINGFROM YOURUNCONSCIOUS L
(OWMUCHDOYOUWANTTHISGOAL)FYOUARENOT COMMITTEDTOYOURGOAL YOUWILLNOTACHIEVEIT)FYOUFEEL DOUBT YOURUNCONSCIOUSMAYBETELLINGYOUTHAT SOMETHINGNEEDSMOREATTENTION s (OWDO)FEELABOUTTHISGOAL s $O)WANTITPERCENT s $OESMYENERGYINCREASEWHEN)THINKABOUTIT )FYOUANSWEREDhNOvTOANYQUESTION ADJUSTTHEGOALUNTIL YOUFEELENTHUSIASTICABOUTIT
2%NSURETHATTHE2OUTE)S+NOWN !TTHISSTAGE ITISENOUGHTOHAVEAFEELINGTHATTHEGOALIS POSSIBLE(OWYOUGETTHEREWILLBEEASIERTOWORKOUT LATER AFTERYOUHAVEPLACEDTHEGOALINYOURFUTURE s (ASANYONEELSEACHIEVEDTHISGOAL4HENWHYNOTYOU s 7HOCANASSISTYOUINGETTINGTHERE )FNOONEHASACHIEVEDASIMILARGOALBEFORE s 7HATRESOURCESDOYOUHAVETHATWILLHELP s 7HATADDITIONALRESOURCESDOYOUNEED s 7HATCANYOULEARNFROMANYPREVIOUSATTEMPTS /NCEYOURGOALMEETSTHE0/7%2CRITERIA YOUARE READYTOINSTALLITINTOYOURFUTURE
4)0 4HINKABOUTWHATYOUWILLLEARNANDHOWYOU
WILLGROWINTHEJOURNEYTOWARDYOURGOAL ASWELLAS THEBENElTSWHENYOUHAVEACHIEVEDIT
87_ED245_US 87 .-U;:(*+U9COAU.-
& ) . $!2 / 5 4 %4 /3 5 ##% 3 3 & 5 ,' /! , 3
31/7/06 4:58:56 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0*(fc
3UMMARY3ET 0/7%2FUL'OALS
'OALSGIVEYOUDIRECTION ANDPURPOSE4HEYHELPYOU IDENTIFYANDFOCUSONYOUR PRIORITIES AVITALPROCESSIF YOUARETOKNOWWHEREYOU WANTTOGOINYOURLIFEAND WHATSTEPSYOUNEEDTO TAKETOGETTHERE"UTITIS IMPORTANTTOCHOOSEAND DElNEYOURGOALSWITHCARE WEAK HAZY ORNEGATIVE GOALSMERELYGIVETHE IMPRESSIONOFFORWARD MOVEMENTANDCAN OBSTRUCTYOURPROGRESS 4HE0/7%2CHECKLIST WHICHSTANDSFOR0OSITIVITY /WNERSHIP 7HAT7HEN %FFECTS AND2OUTEWILLHELP YOUTURNVAGUEWANTSAND DESIRESINTODElNITE FOCUSED ANDACHIEVABLEGOALS
0LANOF!CTION
0
4HINK0OSITIVELY %NVISIONASETOFGOALSTHAT SHOWYOUWHEREYOUWANT TOBEINTHEFUTURE
/
/WN9OUR'OALS #HECKTHATYOUWISHTO ACHIEVEEACHGOALFORYOUR OWNSAKE NOTFORANYONEELSE
7
3PECIFY7HATAND7HEN 6ISUALIZEYOURSELFHAVING ACHIEVEDEACHGOALTHISWILL HELPYOUDElNEITMORECLEARLY
%
#ONSIDER!LLTHE%FFECTS !SKYOURSELFWHATITWILL COSTTOACHIEVEEACHGOAL
2
4HINKABOUTTHE2OUTE !SKYOURSELFWHATRESOURCES YOUNEEDTOACHIEVETHEGOAL
#2 % !4 % 4 ( % 6 ) 3 ) / .9/ 57! . 4
88_ED245_US 88 7O=IIUF&..U&./$_dZZ..
31/7/06 4:59:02 pm '(%*%&,'(0'*0+,fc
2EMOVEORREPHRASEANYGOALS THATINCLUDENEGATIVEWORDS SUCHAShNOTvORhDONTv
%NSUREGOALSMOVETOWARD WHATYOUWANT NOTJUST AWAYFROMWHATYOUDONT
!SKYOURSELFWHATYOUCAN DOTOBRINGEACHGOALABOUT BYYOUROWNACTIONS
!SKYOURSELFHOWYOUCAN INmUENCEEVENTSTHATARE OUTSIDEYOURDIRECTCONTROL
&OREACHGOAL SPECIFY EXACTLYWHATWILLBE DIFFERENTWHENITHASBEEN ACHIEVED
3ETSPECIlCDATESFOR ACHIEVINGEACHGOAL
4HINKABOUTTHEWIDEREFFECTS OFACHIEVINGEACHGOAL
!SKYOURSELFHOWMUCHYOU REALLYWANTEACHGOAL
!SKYOURSELFWHOCANASSIST YOUINACHIEVINGTHEGOAL
!SKYOURSELFWHATYOUCAN LEARNFROMANYPREVIOUS ATTEMPTSTOACHIEVETHEGOAL
HEN
ECTS
UTE
89_ED245_US 89 ./U;:(*+U9COAU&&'./
3 5 - - ! 293 % 40 / 7 % 2 & 5 ,' /! , 3
31/7/06 4:59:03 pm ''%*%&,,0*'0).fc
0LACETHE'OALIN9OUR&UTURE .OWTHATYOURGOALISDElNED YOUNEEDTOINSTALLITINTO YOURFUTURE4ODOTHIS YOUNEEDTOlNDOUTWHICH DIRECTIONINYOURPERCEPTUALSPACESIGNIlEShFUTUREvTO YOU TOENGAGEYOURWHOLEBRAININTHEGOALINSTALLATION
(ELP9OUR5NCONSCIOUSTO/RGANIZE4IME "ECAUSEWECANTSEETIME WETENDTOUSESPATIAL METAPHORSTOTHINKANDTALKABOUTIT7EUSEEXPRESSIONS LIKEhTHEDISTANTPAST vhTHESHORTTERM vANDhTHEFAR FUTUREv4HEIDEAOFTIMEASBEINGALINEARSEQUENCEOF EVENTS INWHICHONEMOMENTFOLLOWSANOTHER WILLFEEL QUITEFAMILIARTOYOU4HISISHOWYOURUNCONSCIOUSMIND ORGANIZESYOURPASTMEMORIESEVENTSTHATHAPPENEDA LONGTIMEAGOFEELFARTHERAWAYTHANSOMETHINGTHAT HAPPENEDYESTERDAY ANDTWOHUNDREDYEARSINTHEFUTURE IShALONGWAYOFFvCOMPAREDTOYOURPLANSFORTOMORROW 9OUALSOTALKABOUTTIMEASHAVINGAPARTICULARDIRECTION RELATIVETOYOURVIEWPOINTFOREXAMPLE h)VEPUTITBEHIND ME vORh)MLOOKINGFORWARDTOTHESUMMERv9OUARE USEDTOSEEINGGRAPHSWHERETIMEGOESFROMLEFTTORIGHT ALONGTHELOWERAXISIFYOUSAWONEWITHTHEFUTURE MOVINGTOWARDYOU ORWITHTIMEMOVINGFROMRIGHTTOLEFT ITWOULDAPPEARSTRANGETOYOUBECAUSETIMEWOULDAPPEAR TOBEhSHIFTINGvINTHEWRONGDIRECTION
,OOKINGAT9OUR4IMELINE
90_ED245_US 90 /&U;:(*+U9COAU/&
&UTURE
0AST
&UTURE .OW .OW
4HINKABOUTHOWYOU VISUALIZETIME ANDYOUR OWNPOSITIONINGONYOUR TIMELINE4WOCOMMON DIRECTIONSFORTIMELINESARE SHOWNONTHELEFT)FYOU AREMOVINGTOWARDA PARTIALLYACHIEVEDGOAL YOU AREMORELIKELYTOSEE YOURSELFALREADYONTHE TIMELINESPATH
0AST
#2 % !4 % 4 ( % 6 ) 3 ) / .9/ 57! . 4
31/7/06 4:59:09 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0*-fc
$ISCOVER9OUR4IMELINE 7EARENOTUSUALLYCONSCIOUSLYAWAREOFOURSENSEOFTHEFUTURES DIRECTION BUTITISVERYEASYTODISCOVERIT ANDBEINGABLETO VISUALIZEITCLEARLYWILLHELPYOURFUTURESEEMMOREREALTOYOU
4HINKABOUTTIMEASBEINGLIKEALINE WHEREONEMOMENT FOLLOWSANOTHER4HEPASTISATONEENDOFTHELINE THEFUTURE ATTHEOTHER ANDhNOWvISSOMEWHEREINBETWEEN !SYOULOOKATTHATLINE WHICHDIRECTIONISTHEPAST 7HICHDIRECTIONISTHEFUTURE .OTICEWHEREhNOWvISWHEREYOUARE ORAHEADOFYOU *OINTHEPAST PRESENT ANDFUTUREWITHALINE ANDNOTICE WHERETHATLINEISINRELATIONTOYOU 7HATCOLORISYOURTIMELINE4HECOLORHASNOPARTICULAR SIGNIlCANCE BUTITWILLHELPYOUTOSEETHETIMELINEMORECLEARLY
#HOOSE9OUR$IRECTION 4IMELINESMOSTCOMMONLYTAKEONEOFTWOFORMS s 4HEFUTUREISINFRONTOFYOU THEPASTISBEHINDYOU AND YOUARESTANDINGAThNOWvTHISFORMMAKESITEASYTO BEhINTHEMOMENTv s 4HEFUTUREISTOYOURRIGHT THEPASTISTOYOURLEFT NOW ISALITTLEINFRONTOFYOUTHISFORMCANBEHELPFULFOR TIMEMANAGEMENTANDPUNCTUALITYISSUES ASYOUCAN SEEWHEREEVENTSAREINRELATIONTOEACHOTHER 4HESEARENOTTHEONLYPOSSIBILITIESTIMELINESHAVENO RIGHTORWRONGDIRECTIONS4AKETHEFORMTHATCOMES NATURALLYINASITUATION ANDUSEITINYOURVISUALIZATIONS
4)0 )FYOUDONOTSEEYOURTIMELINECLEARLY IT
DOESNOTMATTER PROVIDEDYOUHAVEASENSEOFWHICH DIRECTIONTHEFUTUREISIN ANDWHEREhNOWvIS
91_ED245_US 91 /'U;:(*+U9COAU/'
0 , !#%4 ( %' /! ,) .9/ 5 2& 5 4 5 2 %
31/7/06 4:59:10 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0*.fc
-AKE9OUR'OAL#OMPELLING 4HElNALSTEPBEFOREINSTALLINGYOURGOALISTOMAKEYOUR MENTALIMAGEOFTHEGOALASVIVIDASPOSSIBLE9OUWANTA PICTURETHATISSOCOMPELLINGTHATITPULLSYOUTOWARDIT WITHOUTYOURHAVINGTOTRYTOMOTIVATEYOURSELF4ODOTHIS TUNEUPTHEIMAGETOAPPEALTOALLOFYOURSENSES s 4URNUPTHEVISUALQUALITIESOFTHEIMAGE-AKEITVIVID ANDCOMPELLINGBUTNOTGARISH ASITHASTOREMAIN REALISTICTOMAXIMIZEITSEMOTIONALIMPACT4HENSTEP INTOITIFYOUARENOTTHEREALREADY SOTHATYOUARE SEEINGITASIFYOUWEREREALLYTHERE s 4URNUPTHESOUNDANDTHESENSATIONS7HATDOYOU HEAR7HATDOESITFEELLIKETOHAVEACHIEVEDYOUR GOALANDTOKNOWYOUDESERVEDIT-AKEANYlNAL ADJUSTMENTSTHATYOUNEEDTO ANDTURNUPTHOSEGOOD FEELINGSEVENMORE s .OWSTEPBACKOUTOFTHEPICTURE)FYOUSTAYEDINIT YOUCOULDDAYDREAMABOUTTHEGOALFOREVERWITHOUT DOINGANYTHINGABOUTIT3TEPPINGOUTREMINDSYOUTHAT YOUARENOTTHEREYETANDYOUHAVETOMAKETHINGS HAPPENINTHEREALWORLDINORDERTOGETTHERE
92_ED245_US 92 /(U;:(*+U9COAU/(
t
4%#(.)15%3 TOPRACTICE
5SEYOURTIMELINEASATOOL INTHISEFFECTIVETECHNIQUE FORFASTRELAXATION 9OUSHOULDlNDTHATITWILLHELP YOUTOTAKEYOURSELFOUTOF UNCOMFORTABLEEMOTIONS AND WILLGIVEYOUSOMEPERSPECTIVEIF YOUNEEDTOMAKEATOUGH DECISION #LOSEYOUREYESANDBECOME AWAREOFYOURTIMELINE
!LLOWYOURSELFTOmOATABOVE hNOW vORLETTHETIMELINESINK AWAYBENEATHYOU &LOATUPUNTILYOUREACHA HEIGHTATWHICHYOUARE COMFORTABLE .OTICEHOWYOUFEELmOATING ABOVETHETIMELINE COMPARED TOBEINGATTIMELINELEVEL 7HENYOUFEELRELAXED mOAT DOWNANDOPENYOUREYES
#2 % !4 % 4 ( % 6 ) 3 ) / .9/ 57! . 4
31/7/06 4:59:12 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0+&fc
#REATING9OUR6ISION %XPERIENCINGYOURGOALASIFITHASALREADYHAPPENEDMAKES ITREALTOYOUANDSTRENGTHENSYOURFEELINGTHATITISNOT ONLYPOSSIBLE BUTISDElNITELYGOINGTOHAPPEN
3EE9OURSELFINTHE 0ICTURE!SYOULOOK ATYOURIMAGEOFTHE GOAL YOUSHOULDFEELA POWERFULMOTIVATING PULLTOGETTHERE
3PECIFY7HO)S4HERE WITH9OU3EEINGWHO WILLBEWITHYOUINYOUR FUTUREWILLINCREASEYOUR EMOTIONALCONNECTION WITHTHEGOAL
-AKE3URETHE 0ICTURE)S"RIGHT!BIG BRIGHT COMPELLINGIMAGE WILLENGAGEYOURHEARTAS WELLASYOURINTELLECT
4)0 )FYOURGOALISNOTMOTIVATINGENOUGH MAKE SURETHATITMEETSALLTHE0/7%2CRITERIAAND EXPERIMENTWITHMAKINGITMOREVIVID
93_ED245_US 93 /)U;:(*+U9COAU/)
0 , !#%4 ( %' /! ,) .9/ 5 2& 5 4 5 2 %
31/7/06 4:59:13 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0+*fc
)NSTALL9OUR'OAL h0LANTINGvAGOALINTOYOURFUTURETIMELINEMAKESITPARTOF THELANDSCAPEOFYOURUNCONSCIOUSMIND ANDWILLGIVEYOU AFEELINGOFCERTAINTYTHATYOURGOALISGOINGTOHAPPEN YOURUNCONSCIOUSWILLTREATITASTHOUGHITALREADYHAS 4HEINSTALLATIONCANBEAVERYPOWERFULPROCESSEMOTIONALLY WHICHHASTHEBENElTOFEMBEDDINGYOURGOALSTRONGLYIN YOURMEMORYANDYOURTHOUGHTS-AKESURETHATYOURGOAL MEETSTHE0/7%2CRITERIAANDISASVIVIDASPOSSIBLE BEFOREYOUINSTALLIT
#OMBINE9OUR#ONSCIOUSAND5NCONSCIOUS 4HEPROCESSISDESIGNEDTOWORKONBOTHACONSCIOUSAND ANUNCONSCIOUSLEVEL9OUMAYlNDTHATIDEASANDIMAGES ABOUTHOWTOACHIEVETHEGOALSTARTCOMINGTOYOUEITHER DURINGTHEINSTALLATIONPROCESSORSHORTLYAFTERWARD!NY RITUALCONSISTENTWITHYOURBELIEFSYSTEMTHATYOUWISHTO PERFORMBEFORETHEINSTALLATION SUCHASSAYINGAPRAYEROR BREATHINGLIFEINTOTHEPICTUREOFYOURGOAL CANONLYHELP TOMAKETHEPROCESSMORESIGNIlCANTFORYOU
94_ED245_US 94 /*U;:(*+U9COAU/*
THINK
3-!24 9OUMAYlNDTHATmOATINGYOURGOALINTOYOUR TIMELINEANEQUALLYVALIDALTERNATIVEMETHOD WORKSBETTERFORYOU 3OMEPEOPLElNDTHISVARIATIONONTHEPROCESSDESCRIBED OPPOSITEISANEASIERWAYTOINSTALLTHEIRGOALINTOTHEIRFUTURE &LOATFORWARDABOVETHETIMELINEINTOTHEFUTURE CARRYING YOURGOALWITHYOU 2ELEASETHEGOALABOVETHETARGETDATE,ETITmOATDOWN INTOTHETIMELINEANDEMBEDITSELFASPARTOFYOURFUTURE &LOATBACKTONOW WATCHINGEVENTSBETWEENNOWANDTHE TARGETDATEREALIGNINGTHEMSELVESTOHELPYOUREACHYOURGOAL
#2 % !4 % 4 ( % 6 ) 3 ) / .9/ 57! . 4
31/7/06 4:59:15 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0+,fc
0LACING9OUR'OALIN9OUR4IMELINE 9OUCANFOLLOWTHISPROCESSONYOUROWNOR EVENBETTER GET AFRIENDTOGUIDEYOUTHROUGHEACHSTEP LEAVINGYOUFREETO EXPERIENCEYOURTHOUGHTSANDFEELINGSASYOUGO "EFOREYOUSTART LAYYOURTIMELINEOUTONTHEmOOR MAKINGSURE YOUHAVEENOUGHSPACETOTAKEASTEPBEYONDTHEPOINTTHAT REPRESENTSTHEDATEBYWHICHYOUAREGOINGTOACHIEVEYOURGOAL
0UTYOURIMAGEOFYOURGOALINTOANIMAGINARYFRAME ANDAS YOUHOLDIT STEPONTOTHETIMELINE FACINGTHEFUTURE
7ALKALONGTHETIMELINEINTOTHEFUTURE CARRYINGYOURGOAL 3TOPWHENTHEGOALISDIRECTLYABOVETHETARGETDATE ,ETGOOFTHEGOALANDALLOWITTOSETTLEINTOYOURTIMELINE
3TEPFORWARDINTOTHEGOALANDEXPERIENCEITFULLYALLOW YOURSELFTOFEELTHESENSEOFACHIEVEMENT
4AKEASTEPBEYONDYOURGOALANDTURNAROUNDSOTHATYOUARE LOOKINGBACKATTHESUCCESSFULACHIEVEMENTOFYOURGOAL9OU MAYNOTICETHATTHEEVENTSLEADINGUPTOTHEACHIEVEMENT REALIGNTHEMSELVESTOSUPPORTTHEACHIEVEMENT7HATADVICE DOYOUHAVEFORTHEhYOUvBACKAThNOWv 2ETURNTOhNOWvALONGTHETIMELINE ANDLOOKINTOTHEFUTURE9OU WILLHAVEASENSEOFKNOWINGTHATTHEGOALISGOINGTOHAPPEN
95_ED245_US 95 /+U;:(*+U9COAU/+
.OW
4ARGET$ATE
&UTURE
0 , !#%4 ( %' /! ,) .9/ 5 2& 5 4 5 2 %
31/7/06 4:59:16 pm ''%*%&,,0)/0+.fc
'ETTING 4HERE
.OWTHATYOUHAVESETYOURGOALS YOUHAVE TOGETOUTTHEREANDMAKETHEMHAPPEN 4HISCANSEEMDAUNTINGUNLESSYOUCLEARLY IDENTIFYPOTENTIALROUTESTOYOURGOAL AND TAKESTEPSTOSAFEGUARDYOURENERGYAND COMMITMENTALONGTHEWAY4HISSECTION SHOWSYOU s7HYITISIMPORTANTTOWRITEYOURGOALS DOWNANDMAKEAPUBLICCOMMITMENT s3TRATEGIESFORFREEINGUPYOURENERGYAND GETTINGSTARTED s(OWTOCREATEADETAILEDROUTETOYOURGOAL s(OWTOSTAYMOTIVATEDANDLEARNFROM MISTAKES s4 HEBENElTSOFLOOKINGBEYONDMATERIAL ANDPERFORMANCEGOALS
96_ED245_US 96 /,U;:(*+U9COAU/,
31/7/06 4:59:22 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0&*fc
97_ED245_US 97 /-U;:(*+U9COAU/-
31/7/06 4:59:23 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0&/fc
-AKE9OUR'OALS(APPEN %VENAFTERYOURGOALSHAVEBEENSET ITSIMPORTANTTO PLANYOURROUTETOTHEMINMANAGEABLESTEPSTOENSURE THATYOUDONTBECOMEDISCOURAGEDBYTHETASK4HIS SECTIONSHOWSYOUHOWTOTURNYOURIDEASINTOREALITY
3WITCH/FF9OUR!UTOPILOT 4HERESULTSWEGETCOMEFROMTHEWAYINWHICHOURACTIONS WORKWITHOURENVIRONMENTTHEPEOPLEAROUNDUS THE RESOURCESAVAILABLETOUS ANDRULESANDEXPECTATIONSOF SOCIETY 7ECANNOTCONTROLOUR ENVIRONMENT BUTWEAREABLETO CHOOSEOURACTIONS3OWHENYOU )TTAKESAT CHANGEYOURACTIONS YOURRESULTS CHANGENOTALWAYSPREDICTABLY LEASTDAYS WHICHISWHYYOUNEEDTOMONITOR TOESTABLISHA THERESULTSCLOSELYANDMAKEFURTHER NEWHABIT CHANGESIFYOUNEEDTO -OSTOF YOURBEHAVIORHAPPENSON AUTOPILOT WITHOUTCONSCIOUS ANALYSIS4HISWORKSWELLONADAY TO DAYLEVEL SINCEYOU WOULDNEVERHAVETIMETOTHINKTHROUGHEVERYSINGLE DECISIONCONSCIOUSLY(OWEVER ITPRESENTSACHALLENGE WHENYOUWANTTOCHANGEYOURBEHAVIOR
3TAY&OCUSED -AKINGBEHAVIORALCHANGEHAPPENISOFTENCOMPAREDTO THEPROCESSOFTURNINGANOILTANKERAROUND/LDHABITS HAVETHEIROWNMOMENTUM4HEYWILLREASSERTTHEMSELVES ASSOONASYOURATTENTIONWANDERS UNTILYOURNEWHABITS HAVEHADTIMETOBECOMEESTABLISHED2EMEMBERTHATYOU NEEDTOKEEPYOURGOALSATTHEFOREFRONTOFYOURMIND
i
/NEOFTHEILLUSIONSOFLIFEISTHATTHEPRESENTHOURIS NOTTHECRITICAL DECISIVEHOUR7RITEITONYOURHEART THATEVERYDAYISTHEBESTDAYOFTHEYEAR
98_ED245_US 98 /.U;:(*+U9COAU/.
' % 4 4 ) . ' 4 ( % 2 %
w
2ALPH7ALDO%MERSON
31/7/06 4:59:24 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0''fc
w
#HANGING9OUR"EHAVIOR #HANGECANHAPPENSOONERTHANYOUEXPECT)TDOESTAKE TIMEANDEFFORT BUTYOUCANMAKEITALOTEASIERBYDOINGIT THESMARTWAYRATHERTHANTHEHARDWAY
7RITEYOURGOALSDOWN7HENYOUWRITEYOURGOALSDOWN THEYBECOMEMOREREALTHANWHENYOUONLYTHINKABOUTTHEM OREVENTALKABOUTTHEM7RITINGTHEGOALSlXESTHEMINYOUR MEMORYANDSTOPSTHEMFROMCHANGINGORFADINGAWAY !SYOUWRITEYOURGOALS YOUACTIVATETHEPREFRONTALCORTEX APARTOFYOURBRAINTHATDEALSWITHEXPECTATIONS DECISION MAKING ANDCHOICEMAKINGYOUMOREABLETONOTICEAND CHANGEHABITUALBEHAVIORS 0UTYOURGOALSWHEREYOUWILLSEETHEMEVERYDAY(ANG THEMONYOURBEDROOMWALL SOTHATTHEYARETHElRSTTHING YOUSEEWHENYOUWAKEUPPINTHEMINFRONTOFYOURDESKAT WORKORHAVETHEMASASTART UPMESSAGEORSCREENSAVERON YOURCOMPUTER(AVETHEMACCESSIBLEATALLTIMES -AKEAPUBLICCOMMITMENTTOYOURGOALS4HISTAKESYOUR GOALSANOTHERSTEPALONGTHEROADFROMIDEATOREALITY0EOPLE ARESOCIALANIMALS ANDYOUPROBABLYDOCAREWHATOTHER PEOPLETHINKABOUTTHEM5SETHATCHARACTERISTICTOHELPYOUR MOTIVATIONBYTELLINGPEOPLEYOUTRUSTANDWHOSEOPINIONYOU VALUEABOUTYOURGOALS
)MPLEMENTING#HANGE ()'()-0!#4
4EAMINGUPWITHAGOAL SETTING PARTNERTOPROVIDESUPPORT L+EEPINGYOURGOALSVISIBLE AND CHECKINGTHEMEVERYFEWDAYS L$ISCUSSINGYOURGOALSWITH FRIENDSANDCOLLEAGUES L
99_ED245_US 99 //U;:(*+U9COAU//
.%'!4)6%)-0!#4
4RYINGANDFAILINGTOMAKE THEJOURNEYONYOUROWN L7RITINGYOURGOALSDOWN THEN PUTTINGTHEMAWAYINADRAWER L+EEPINGYOURGOALSTOYOURSELF ANDGUARDINGTHEMASYOURSECRET L
- ! + %9/ 5 2' /! , 3( ! 0 0 % .
31/7/06 4:59:26 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0')fc
2EMEMBERTHAT9OU(AVEA#HOICE )NWESTERNSOCIETIES MANYPEOPLEHAVEHADEVERYTHING DONEFORTHEMASCHILDREN ANDHADLITTLEEARLYTRAININGIN TAKINGRESPONSIBILITY$URINGTHETEENAGEYEARS SIMPLE CHORESLIKEDOINGTHEDISHESBECOMEBATTLEGROUNDSINTHE STRUGGLEFORANINDEPENDENTIDENTITY!SANADULT THIS BACKGROUNDCANLEAVEYOUWITHAFEELINGOFRESENTMENTOF ANYTASKYOUhHAVEvTODO%VENIFTHETASKISAVITALSTEP ONTHEWAYTOSOMETHINGYOUREALLYWANT YOUMAYlND YOURSELFDOINGITHALF HEARTEDLYWHILEINWARDLYCOMPLAINING 4OGETAROUNDTHISATTITUDE REMIND YOURSELFTHATYOUARECHOOSING MINUTE YOURCOURSEOFACTION.OONEELSE ISGOINGTOSTEPINANDDOITFOR YOU$OITGLADLYBECAUSEITWILL )FYOUREACHIMPASSE TAKEYOUCLOSERTOYOURGOALS ONATASKONTHE
&)8
WAYTOYOURGOAL USETHISPROMPT 4HEANSWERSREMIND YOUWHYYOUNEEDTO ACTANDSHOULDGETYOU BACKONTRACKFAST L
7HATPARTDOESTHIS
TASKPLAYINMYPLAN L
)NWHATWAYDOESIT
BRINGMECLOSERTO MYGOAL L
6ISUALIZEYOURGOAL COMINGCLOSERASYOU COMPLETETHETASK THENGETSTRAIGHTBACK TOWORK
3TAYON4RACK $ISPLACEMENTACTIVITIESAREWHAT YOUDOTOAVOIDTACKLINGSOME OTHERMOREIMPORTANTTASKTO WHICHYOUHAVEANUNCONSCIOUS RESISTANCE!NEXAMPLEMIGHTBE CHECKINGYOUREMAILSWHENYOU HAVEACRUCIALREPORTTOWRITE4HE DISPLACEMENTACTIVITYISANATTEMPT TOREDUCESTRESS)TDOESNOTWORK BECAUSEATTHEBACKOFYOURMIND ISTHENAGGINGFEELINGTHATTHEREIS SOMETHINGELSEYOUSHOULDBE DOING9OUWILLlNDTHATTHEBEST WAYTOREDUCEYOURSTRESSLEVELS ISTOGETSTARTEDONYOURMOST IMPORTANTTASKRIGHTAWAY
4)0 7ALKLIKESOMEONEWHOISCONlDENT)TWILL CHANGEHOWYOUFEEL
' % 4 4 ) . ' 4 ( % 2 %
100_ED245_US 100 '&&U;:(*+U9COAU'&&
31/7/06 4:59:27 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0'*fc
'IVE9OURSELFAN%NERGY"OOST /URTHOUGHTSANDEMOTIONSINmUENCETHEPHYSICALSYSTEMS OFTHEBODYANDVICEVERSA)FYOUSTANDSLUMPEDOVER GAZINGATYOURSHOES YOUWILLlNDITHARDTOTHINK POSITIVELYBUTTHEREVERSEISALSOTRUE7HATISYOUR NORMALPOSTURELIKE ANDHOWHASITBEENINmUENCINGHOW YOUFEEL7HATCHANGESWILLYOUMAKEFROMNOWON
3TRAIGHTEN5P 3TANDINGUPWITHARMS OUTSPREAD YOULLlNDIT EASIERTOACCESSPOSITIVE THOUGHTSANDEXCITEMENT
101_ED245_US 101 '&'U;:(*+U9COAU'&'
,OOK5P)TISHARDTO FEELUNHAPPY LOWENERGY STATESWHENYOUARE LOOKINGFORWARDANDOUT ATTHEWORLD
4HINK0OSITIVE+EEP THESAMEPOSITIONANDLET EXCITINGTHOUGHTSmOW THROUGHYOU%XPERIENCE THEMFULLYFORAMINUTE
- ! + %9/ 5 2' /! , 3( ! 0 0 % .
31/7/06 4:59:28 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0'-fc
&OCUSON9OUR$ESIRED/UTCOME -OSTTHINGSBECOMEEASIERWHENYOUFOCUSONTHEEND RESULT RATHERTHANONTHESLOGOFGETTINGTHEREIT MOVESYOURWAYOFTHINKINGFROMPASSIVETOACTIVE AND CLOSERTOBEINGATTHE#AUSEENDOFTHESPECTRUM
3TAY#LEARABOUT9OUR'OAL )FYOUAREWORKINGTOWARDALONG TERMGOALORGOALS YOU MAYlNDTHAT OVERTIME YOURFOCUSGETSBLUNTEDALITTLE)F YOUDISCUSSYOURGOALSWITHOTHERS THEYMAYNOTALWAYSBE SUPPORTIVEOTHEROUTSIDEFACTORSMAYRAISEDOUBTSINYOUR MIND ANDEVENTUALLYYOURDETERMINATIONMAYBEGINTOFAIL 9OUCANSTOPTHISFROMHAPPENINGALONGTHEWAYTOYOUR GOALBYMAINTAININGACONSTANTPROCESSOFASSESSMENT %VENIFYOURGOALREMAINSCONSTANT OTHERTHINGS YOURPERSONALCIRCUMSTANCESORRELATIONSHIPS ORTHE CIRCUMSTANCESOFPEOPLECLOSETOYOUMAYCHANGE*UST BECAUSEYOUMAYNEEDTORECONSIDERTHEROUTETOYOUR GOAL THOUGH DONTFALTER ORLOSEFOCUS'OCALMLYBACK
#!3%STUDY3PEAKING5PIN-EETINGS +IM AMARKETINGMANAGER FOUND ITHARDTOSPEAKUPINIMPORTANT MEETINGSBECAUSESHEFELTSELF CONSCIOUS9ETINOTHERAREASOF HERWORKSHEWASCONlDENTAND FOCUSED3HEREALIZEDTHATSHEWAS GOINGINTOEACHMEETINGWITHOUTA CLEARIDEAOFWHATSHEWANTEDFROM IT EVENTHOUGHTHEDECISIONSTOBE MADEWOULDHAVEAMAJORIMPACT ONHERPROJECTS!FTERDISCUSSINGTHE ISSUEWITHHERCOACH SHEDECIDED TOGETCLEARBEFOREEACHMEETING ONTHEWAYSHEWANTEDITTOGO )NTHENEXTMEETING +IMFOUND
HERSELFSPEAKINGUPTOINmUENCE THEOUTCOMEWITHOUTEVENTHINKING ABOUTIT s"ECAUSESHENOWHADADESIRED OUTCOMEINMIND +IMSATTENTION WASDIRECTEDOUTSIDEHERSELFIN ORDERTOhREADvTHEMOODOFTHE OTHERPARTICIPANTS RATHERTHAN INWARDTODWELLONHERSENSEOF SELF CONSCIOUSNESS s3HEBEGANTOlNDTHATEVEN OUTSIDEWORK PEOPLELOOKEDTO HERASALEADERINMOSTGROUPSIN WHICHSHEFOUNDHERSELF
' % 4 4 ) . ' 4 ( % 2 %
102_ED245_US 102 '&(U;:(*+U9COAU'&(
31/7/06 4:59:30 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0'.fc
4)0 )NCREASEYOUREMOTIONALENGAGEMENTWITH
EACHSTEPALONGTHEWAYBYASKINGYOURSELF h7HAT DOESTHISSTEPMEANTOMEv
OVERTHESTEPSTOYOURGOALANDSEEIFANYOFTHEMNEEDTO CHANGETOTAKEACCOUNTOFOTHERCHANGES
7ORK"ACKWARD
-ILESTONESTO9OUR'OAL
%VENWHENPEOPLEHAVESET ACOMPELLINGGOALFOR THEMSELVES THEYMAY STRUGGLEWITHKNOWING WHERETOSTART/FALLTHE POSSIBLEACTIONSTHATLIE BEFOREYOU WHICHSTEP SHOULDYOUTAKElRST7HEN YOUINSTALLEDYOURGOALON THETIMELINE SOMEOFTHE MILESTONESALONGTHEWAYTO YOURGOALMAYHAVEPOPPED INTOYOURMINDASYOU WALKEDBACKTOhNOWv4O BESUREYOUARECLEARABOUT THEBESTPATHTOYOURGOAL USETHEMORELEFT BRAINED APPROACHSHOWNINTHE mOWCHARTONTHERIGHT)TIS BASEDONTHEPRINCIPLETHAT YOUWILLlNDITEASIERTO ESTABLISHTHEROUTETOYOUR GOALWHENYOUSTARTFROM WHEREYOUWANTTOBE AND WORKBACKWARD"ESTOFALL ITOFFERSYOUACLEARPATHOF ACTIONSOTHATYOUKNOWNOT ONLYWHATCOMESlRST BUT WHATCOMESNEXT TOO
103_ED245_US 103 '&)U;:(*+U9COAU'&)
4AKEALARGESHEETOFPAPER ANDWRITEYOURGOALATTHE RIGHT HANDEDGE)MAGINETHATYOU HAVEALREADYACHIEVEDYOURGOAL
!SKYOURSELFWHATCONDITIONS NEEDEDTOBEINPLACEBEFORETHIS GOALHAPPENEDINORDERFORITTOBE ACHIEVED7RITEEACHCONDITIONTO THELEFTOFTHEGOAL
$RAWARROWSJOININGTHECONDITIONS TOTHEGOAL4REATEACHOFTHESE CONDITIONSASTHERESULTOFSOME OTHERPREVIOUSCONDITIONS
!SKh7HATCONDITIONSNEEDEDTO BEINPLACEINORDERFORTHISTO HAPPENv7RITETHEMINTHEIR APPROPRIATEPLACESTOTHELEFTOF THERESULTS
+EEPWORKINGBACKWARDUNTIL YOUARRIVEATYOURlRSTSTEP 9OUNOWHAVETHEESSENTIAL hMILESTONESvALONGTHEWAY TOYOURGOAL
& / #5 3/ .9/ 5 2$ % 3 ) 2 % $/ 5 4#/ - %
31/7/06 4:59:31 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0(&fc
0LAYTO9OUR3TRENGTHS .OBODYCANBEASTARATEVERYTHING4RYINGTOFOLLOW SOMEONEELSESFORMULAFORSUCCESSCANMEANWETRY TOBECOMESOMETHINGWEARENOT ANDTHENBLAME OURSELVESWHENTHEFORMULATURNSOUTNOTTOSUITUS
3TAY!WARE 2EMEDYINGANYGAPSINYOURSKILLSTHATHOLDYOUBACK AND FACINGTHECHALLENGESOFLEARNINGNEWWAYSOFBEHAVING CANBEEXTREMELYUSEFULBUTIFTHATISALLTHATYOUDO LIFE WILLBEACONSTANTROUNDOFHARDWORK ANDYOUMAYlND YOURMOTIVATIONEBBING!DAPTATIONINEVITABLYTAKES ENERGYTOMAKEYOURPATHTOSUCCESSSUSTAINABLE YOUALSO NEEDTOPLAYTOYOURSTRENGTHSBYUSINGWHATYOUARE NATURALLYGOODAT4HEBETTERYOUKNOWYOURSELFANDTHE WAYSINWHICHYOUARELIKELYTORESPONDINANYSITUATION THEEASIERITWILLBETOCHOOSETHEPATHTHATWORKSFORYOU s .OTICEWHICHASPECTSOFGETTINGTOYOURGOALENTHUSE YOU ANDWHICHAREMOREOFACHORE)FYOUCAN lND WAYSTOMAKETHECHORESEASIERBYDELEGATINGTHEMTO SOMEONEELSEWHOISGOODATTHEM2EMEMBER YOUARE NOTREQUIREDTODOEVERYTHINGYOURSELF s -AKESURETHATALLTHEACTIONSNECESSARYTOACHIEVEYOUR GOALARECOVERED BYSOMEONEELSEIFNOTBYYOUTHE TEMPTATIONCOULDBETONEGLECTTHEONESTHATDONT COMENATURALLYTOYOU
5SING(ELP%FFECTIVELY ()'()-0!#4
&ACINGUPTOALLTHETASKSTHAT MUSTBEDONEFORYOUTOACHIEVE YOURGOAL L$ELEGATINGWHERENECESSARY L4AKINGONTHOSETASKSFORWHICH YOUHAVEANATURALABILITYAND ENJOYINGWORKINGONTHEM L
.%'!4)6%)-0!#4
,OOKINGONLYATTHOSETASKSTHAT YOUARECONlDENTYOUCANDO YOURSELF L2EFUSINGTODELEGATEANYJOBS L7ORKINGONAHOSTOFTASKS SIMULTANEOUSLYANDFAILINGTO ENJOYANYOFTHEM L
' % 4 4 ) . ' 4 ( % 2 %
104_ED245_US 104 '&*U;:(*+U9COAU'&*
31/7/06 4:59:33 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0((fc
2AISE9OUR3ELF !WARENESS 7HENYOURSELF KNOWLEDGEISSTRONG YOUBECOMELESSLIKELY TOSABOTAGEYOUREFFORTSUNCONSCIOUSLY BECAUSEYOUARE FAMILIARWITHHOWYOUTHINKANDOPERATE5SETHESE QUESTIONSTOLEARNMOREABOUTYOURSELF
$OYOURECHARGEYOURENERGIES BYGOINGOUTWITHLOTSOF 4HEREMAYBE PEOPLE ORBYRELAXINGONYOUR SEVERAL OWNORWITHACLOSEFRIENDOR DIFFERENT PARTNER)FTHEANSWERIShLOTSOF PATHSTOTHE PEOPLE vYOURPATHTOYOURGOALS NEEDSTOINCLUDEPLENTYOF SAMEGOAL OPPORTUNITIESFORSOCIALIZINGOR WORKINGINAGROUPTOKEEPYOUR ENERGYLEVELSHIGH)FTHEOTHEROPTIONAPPEALSMORE MAKE SUREYOUBUILDINSOMEhMEvTIMEINWHICHYOUCANRESTORE YOURENERGY (OWDOYOUKNOWYOUAREDOINGAGOODJOB$OYOU hJUSTKNOWvORDOYOUNEEDTOHEARITFROMOTHERPEOPLE)F YOUNEEDLOTSOFFEEDBACK CONSIDERWHEREYOUWILLBEGETTING THISFROMONTHEWAYTOYOURGOALIFYOUDONTGETENOUGH YOUMAYSTARTTODOUBTYOUROWNABILITIES ANDTHISDOUBTWILL INTURNDILUTETHEEFFORTTHATYOUAREPUTTINGINANDMAKEIT HARDERFORYOUTOREACHYOURGOAL)FYOUhJUSTKNOW vYOUMAY WANTTOSOUNDOUTASECONDOPINIONOCCASIONALLYTOGETA BALANCEDVIEWOFYOURPROGRESS ANDTOENSURETHATYOUSTAY ONTRACKANDTHATYOURVISIONOFTHEENDGOALREMAINSCLEAR !REYOUMOREATEASEWITHDETAILS ORWITHTHEBIG PICTURE)FYOUAREADETAILPERSON YOUMAYNEEDDELIBERATELY TOREMINDYOURSELFOFYOURULTIMATEGOALFROMTIMETOTIMESO YOUDONTGETLOSTINTHETRIVIAOFDAY TO DAYLIVING ANDMIRED DOWNINTHEMINUTIAEOFEVERYDAYLIFE)FYOUAREMORE INTERESTEDINTHEBIGPICTURE ITMAYBEWISETOENLISTTHEHELP OFSOMEONEELSETOCHECKTHEDETAILSFORYOUINCASEYOUHAVE MISSEDSOMETHING
105_ED245_US 105 '&+U;:(*+U9COAU'&+
0 , !94 /9/ 5 23 4 2 % . ' 4 ( 3
31/7/06 4:59:34 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0(*fc
$EALWITH/VERLOAD 3OMETIMESTHEREJUSTSEEMSTOBETOOMUCHTODO AND BIGPROJECTSCANSEEMOVERWHELMING)FYOUHAVE FOLLOWEDTHEPREVIOUSGUIDELINES THISSHOULDNTHAPPEN OFTEN BUTHERESHOWTODEALWITHITWHENITDOES
$ONT$OTOO-UCH )FYOUHAVETOOMANYPROJECTSGOINGATONCE YOUWILLHAVE TOMAKESOMECHOICESABOUTWHICHONESYOUAREGOINGTO COMPLETE ANDWHICHYOUWANTTOPUTONTHEBACKBURNER 2EFERBACKTOYOURhSIXYEAR THREEYEAR ONEYEARvGOAL SHEETTOREMINDYOUOFYOURPRIORITIES'ETINTOTHEHABITOF SAYINGNOTOANYNEWPROJECTSUNTILYOUHAVEYOURCURRENT COMMITMENTSUNDERCONTROL)FATASKSEEMSTOOBIGAND OVERWHELMINGTOGETSTARTED BREAKITDOWNINTOSMALLER TASKSUNTILYOUREACHASIZETHATYOUARECOMFORTABLEWITH +EEPYOURENDGOALINMIND -ANAGE9OUR0ROJECT"REAKBIG ANDREMEMBERTHATEACH TASKSDOWNASIFYOUWEREBUILDINGA SMALLERTASKISANOTHERSTEP HOUSEDIVIDETHEMINTOMANAGEABLE STAGESANDDEALWITHTHEMONEBYONE TOWARDIT
106_ED245_US 106 '&,U;:(*+U9COAU'&,
31/7/06 4:59:36 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0(.fc
t
4%#(.)15%3 TOPRACTICE
5SEASYSTEMTHATWORKSFOR GETTINGTHINGSDONELEARN NOTTOPROCRASTINATE 7HENYOUFAILTOTAKEACTION ITS USUALLYBECAUSEYOUDONTWANT TOTAKEONACHORE9OUNOTICE THATACHORENEEDSDOING THINK ABOUTHOWBORINGDOINGITWILL BE DECIDENOTTODOITYET THEN GOAROUNDTHESAMELOOPUNTIL YOUCANTPUTOFFDOINGITANY LONGER4HISTAKESMOREENERGY
THANDOINGITRIGHTAWAY5SE THISTECHNIQUEWHENEVERYOUFEEL YOURSELFBEGINTOPROCRASTINATE 4AKEYOURLEASTFAVORITECHORE )MAGINEHOWGOODTHINGSWILL BEWHENYOUHAVECOMPLETED THETASK ANDHOWGOODYOU WILLFEELASARESULT +EEPINGTHISIMAGEINMIND GIVElVEMINUTESOFYOURFULL ATTENTIONTOTHETASKANDSEE HOWFARYOUGET
'ET4HINGSIN0ERSPECTIVE 5SEYOURTIMELINETOHELPYOUPUT +EEPYOUR YOURWORKINTOPERSPECTIVEAND GAINANOVERALLFOCUSONWHATYOU COMMITMENT HAVETODO-ENTALLY LAYYOUR LEVELSINMIND TIMELINEOUTONTHEmOOR WITHTHE ATALLTIMES PROJECTSTARTANDENDDATESMARKED OUTONIT3TEPAWAYFROMYOUR TIMELINEANDGIVEYOURSELFENOUGH DISTANCETOSEETHETASKINTHECONTEXTOFTHETIMEBEFOREIT STARTEDANDTHETIMEAFTERITISCOMPLETE4HISWILLGIVEYOU AMOREACCURATEPERSPECTIVEONITANDREDUCEYOURFEELINGS OFhOVERWHELMvUNTILYOUHAVEYOURCURRENTCOMMITMENTS UNDERCONTROL ANDHAVETIMETOTHINKABOUTWHETHERYOU HAVETHESPACETOTAKEONMORE
4)0 ,EAVESOMEUNCOMMITTEDhCONTINGENCYTIMEv FORTHINGSYOUHAVEOVERLOOKEDORTHATNEEDlXING UNEXPECTEDLYDONTlLLYOURSCHEDULECOMPLETELY
107_ED245_US 107 '&-U;:(*+U9COAU'&-
$ % ! ,7 ) 4 (/ 6 % 2 ,/! $
31/7/06 4:59:37 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0)'fc
3UMMARY-AKING'OALS(APPEN !CHIEVINGYOURGOALSTAKESCOMMITMENTANDFOCUSBUTWITH APROPERLYPLANNEDROUTEANDREALISTIC MANAGEABLESTAGES THEPROCESSSHOULDNOTFEELTOOOVERWHELMING0LAYTOYOUR STRENGTHS BUTDONTNEGLECTTHELESSENJOYABLESTEPSORSTAGES ALONGTHEWAYWITHOUTSIDEHELP ADVICE ORTRAINING YOUCAN ALMOSTALWAYSOVERCOMEANYPERSONALLIMITATIONS)FYOU MAKEASTART EVERYTHINGELSEWILLSOONFALLINTOPLACE
0LANOF!CTION
&OCUSON9OUR'OALS 4AKERESPONSIBILITYFORYOUR GOALSREMINDYOURSELFTHAT YOUHAVECHOSENTHESEGOALS
7RITEYOURGOALSDOWNAND lXTHEMINYOURMIND
7ORKTHROUGHTHE3TAGES 7RITEDOWNONEOFYOUR GOALSONTHERIGHT HANDSIDE OFALARGEPIECEOFPAPER
3TARTINGWITHTHEGOALAND WORKINGBACKWARD IDENTIFY EACHSTEPNEEDEDTOREACHIT
$EALWITH/VERLOAD 6ISUALIZETHETIMELINELAIDOUT ONTHEmOORANDhSTEPBACKv TOGAINAWIDERPERSPECTIVE
$ONTDOTOOMUCHATONCE SAYNOTONEWPROJECTSUNTIL CURRENTONESAREUNDERCONTROL
' % 4 4 ) . ' 4 ( % 2 %
108_ED245_US 108 '&.U;:(*+U9COAU&&''&.
31/7/06 4:59:43 pm ''%*%&,,0*'0*,fc
+EEPYOURGOALSWHEREYOU CANSEETHEMEVERYDAY
-AKEAPUBLICCOMMITMENT TELLSOMEONEYOUTRUSTOR TEAMUPWITHAPARTNER
)DENTIFYTHESTEPSTHATYOULL ENJOYORlNDEASYANDTHOSE THATYOULLlNDMOREDIFlCULT
&ACEUPTOTHEWEAKERAREAS EITHERDELEGATEORTAKESTEPS TOREMEDYYOURWEAKNESSES
"REAKDIFlCULTTASKSDOWN INTOSMALLER MOREEASILY MANAGEABLESTAGES
-AKEASTARTEVENIFYOUCAN ONLYGIVElVEMINUTES YOULL FEELBETTERFORHAVINGSTARTED
109_ED245_US 109 '&/U;:(*+U9COAU&&''&/
3 5 - - ! 29- ! + ) . '' /! , 3( ! 0 0 % .
31/7/06 4:59:44 pm ''%*%&,,0*'0+'fc
,IVE5PTO9OUR3ELF )MAGE 0SYCHOLOGISTSHAVEFOUNDTHATPEOPLETENDTOACTINLINE WITHTHEIRSELF IMAGE)FYOUSEEYOURSELFASAN ACHIEVEMENT ORIENTEDPERSON YOUAREMORELIKELYTO TAKETHEACTIONSTHATWILLLEADTOACHIEVEMENT
-AKEA3TART 9OUWILLlNDTHATASSOONASYOUTAKEASMALLSTEPINTHE DIRECTIONYOUWANTTOGO YOUWILLBEINGTOSEEYOURSELFAS THATKINDOFPERSON&OREXAMPLE IFYOUHAVENTBEENABLE TOFACECLEARINGOUTTHECLUTTERIN YOURHOME YOUCANGETYOURSELF STARTEDBYCOMMITTINGTOCLEARING /NCEASTART OUTJUSTONEDRAWERANDTHEN HASBEEN ACTUALLYDOINGIT4HISMAKESIT MADE THEJOB LIKELYTHATYOUWILLGOONANDCLEAR WILLSOONBE OUTMORECLUTTERIFNOTRIGHT COMPLETED AWAY THENTHEFOLLOWINGDAY )TALSOGIVESYOUAREFERENCE EXPERIENCEOFKEEPINGA COMMITMENTTOYOURSELF SOTHATYOUSTARTTOSEEYOURSELF ASAPERSONWHODELIVERSONYOURPROMISES,IKEANYOTHER BELIEF SELF IMAGEBECOMESASELF FULlLLINGPROPHECYTHAT MAKESITEASIERTOTAKEACTIONTOWARDYOURGOALSINTHE FUTURE4HEMOREREFERENCEEXPERIENCESYOUCREATE THE MOREYOUBELIEVEINYOURSELFASANACHIEVER
7ATCH9OURSELF#HANGE /NEOFTHEWAYSINWHICHMANYPEOPLEMAKETHEMSELVES FEELBADISBYPERPETUALLYCOMPARINGTHEIRPERFORMANCE WITHTHATOFSOMEONEELSE ANDlNDINGTHEMSELVESLACKING !MOREEFFECTIVEWAYOFMONITORINGYOURPERFORMANCEIS TOCOMPAREWHEREYOU ARENOWWITHWHEREYOU 4)0 2ATHERTHAN USEDTOBE ANDNOTICE COMPAREYOURSELFWITH HOWFARYOUHAVECOME PEOPLEYOUADMIRE LET ANDTHEPROGRESSTHATYOU THEMINSPIREYOU HAVEMADE ' % 4 4 ) . ' 4 ( % 2 %
110_ED245_US 110 &/,#''-#;:(*+#7Y^_[l[=eWbi$_dZZ''&
31/7/06 4:59:50 pm '(%*%&,(0))0*-fc
2EINFORCE9OUR-OTIVATION 0SYCHOLOGISTSANDANIMALTRAINERSHAVEFOUNDTHATTHEMOST EFFECTIVEWAYTOHELPBOTHHUMANSANDANIMALSFORMNEW HABITSISTOREWARDANDREINFORCEGETTINGTHINGSRIGHT RATHER THANPUNISHINGMISTAKES 9OUCANUSETHISPRINCIPLETOSUSTAINYOURMOTIVATION
7HENYOUARELEARNINGANEWSKILLORPRACTICINGNEWBEHAVIORS FOCUSONTHEIMPROVEMENTSOVERYOURPREVIOUSPERFORMANCE RATHERTHANGIVINGYOURSELFAHARDTIMEABOUTANYMISTAKESOR OMISSIONS 2EWARDYOURSELFFORREACHINGEACHMILESTONETOKEEPYOUR MOTIVATIONHIGHYOUDONOTHAVETOWAITUNTILYOUVEACHIEVED THElNALGOALTOSTARTTOFEELGOODABOUTIT 4AKEAMOMENTATTHEENDOFEACHDAYTONOTICEWHATHAS HAPPENEDTOBRINGYOUCLOSERTOYOURGOAL4HISPROVIDES BEHAVIORALREINFORCEMENTTOYOURUNCONSCIOUSMIND LETTINGIT KNOWTHATITISONTHERIGHT %NVISAGE9OURSELFASA7INNER TRACKANDENCOURAGINGITTODO 0ICTUREYOURSELFASASUCCESS ANDITIS MOREOFTHESAME MORELIKELYTHATYOUWILLBECOMEONE
111_ED245_US 111 '''U;:(*+U9COAU'''
31/7/06 4:59:52 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0*(fc
4AKE#AREOF9OURSELF 4HEJOURNEYTOREACHYOURGOALSMAYBELONG ANDSOME TIMESWILLBEEASIERTHANOTHERS)NORDERTOGETTHERE YOUNEEDTOMAKEWISEUSEOFEVERYTHINGYOUHAVE ESPECIALLYOFYOURMOSTPRECIOUSRESOURCE YOURENERGY
"E+INDTO9OUR"ODY 9OUCANMAKEADIFFERENCETOYOURMOODANDEMOTIONAL STABILITY/NEOFTHEMOSTEFFECTIVEWAYSISTOGIVEUP COFFEE#AFFEINEALSOPRESENTINSMALLERDOSESINTEA COLA ANDCHOCOLATE MIMICSTHEEFFECTOFADRENALINETOGIVEYOU ANENERGYSURGEFOLLOWEDBYADIP4HISCANHAVEAROLLER COASTEREFFECTONYOUREMOTIONS3UGARYFOODSHAVEA SIMILAREFFECT)FYOUDODECIDETOREDUCEYOURCAFFEINE LEVELS DOITGRADUALLY REDUCINGYOURINTAKEININCREMENTS OFONECUPPERDAY TOAVOIDTHEHEADACHESTHATSOMETIMES ACCOMPANYANABRUPTWITHDRAWAL
t
4%#(.)15%3 TOPRACTICE
,EARNTOUSEYOUR UNCONSCIOUSTOHELPYOU DROPBADHABITSAND ADDRESSTHEIRUNDERLYING CAUSES %STABLISHWHATPURPOSEYOUR UNCONSCIOUSTHINKSTHESE BEHAVIORSARESERVING7HENYOU lNDTHIS ITWILLBEEASIERTOGIVE THEHABITSUP #LOSEYOUREYES STILLYOUR MIND ANDCALLUPANIMAGE REPRESENTINGTHEHABIT)TMAY BETHELITTLEVOICETHATNAGS YOUINTOWANTINGANOTHER CIGARETTE FOREXAMPLE
4HANKTHEIMAGEFOR COMMUNICATINGWITHYOU)F YOUHAVEADISLIKEOFYOUROWN HABIT THISMAYBETOUGH REMEMBER YOURUNCONSCIOUS WISHESTHEBESTFORYOU !SKTHEIMAGEWHATITISTRYING TODOFORYOU7AITFORITS ANSWER WHICHMAYARRIVEASA THOUGHTORANIMAGE 4HINKOFOTHERWAYSOF ACHIEVINGTHESAMEEND WITHOUTTHEDRAWBACKS#HECK THATTHEYAREASEFFECTIVEAT FULlLLINGTHEGOODINTENTION BEHINDTHEBADHABIT
' % 4 4 ) . ' 4 ( % 2 %
112_ED245_US 112 ''(U;:(*+U9COAU''(
31/7/06 4:59:53 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0*)fc
-AINTAIN9OUR%NERGY ()'()-0!#4
4HINKINGLONG TERMEATINGWELL ANDEXERCISINGREGULARLYTOKEEP YOURENERGYSTABLE L2ECOGNIZINGENERGYDIPSAND BALANCINGYOURACTIVITIESTO MINIMIZETHEM L%NSURINGTHATYOUCONSISTENTLY GETENOUGHSLEEPTOAWAKE REFRESHEDEACHMORNINGAND REMAINALERTTHROUGHTHEDAY L
.%'!4)6%)-0!#4
5SINGQUICKlXESSUGAR CAFFEINEORNICOTINETO MAINTAINYOURENERGYLEVELS L)GNORINGENERGYDIPSAND WORKINGSTRAIGHTTHROUGHTHEM TOTHEPOINTOFEXHAUSTION L-AINTAININGERRATICSLEEPING HABITS ANDTREATINGEITHER TIREDNESSORSLEEPLESSNESS WITHMEDICATION L
,EARNTO)NTERPRET9OUR3YMPTOMS 5NHEALTHYLIFESTYLESAREACONTRIBUTINGFACTORTOMANY ILLNESSES3OMETIMESPHYSICALSYMPTOMSCANBEEARLY WARNINGSIGNSTHATYOURLIFESTYLENEEDSTOCHANGE3TRESS HEADACHESMAYBEASIGNTHATYOUAREWORKINGTOOHARD PERSISTENTINDIGESTIONMAYBEINDICATINGTHATACHANGEOF DIETISNEEDED ANDSOON)FYOUIGNORETHESESYMPTOMSOR SIMPLYSUPPRESSTHEMWITHOVER THE COUNTERMEDICATION THEWARNINGMESSAGEMAYBERE SENTINAWAYTHATIS HARDERTOIGNORE!SWELLASCONSULTINGYOURPHYSICIAN WHENSYMPTOMSAPPEAR YOUHAVENOTHINGTOLOSEBY ASKINGYOURSELFORTHEPARTOFTHEBODYWHERETHE SYMPTOMAPPEARS h)FTHISISAMESSAGEFORME WHATISIT TRYINGTOTELLMEv7HENYOUGETANANSWERTHATMAKES SENSETOYOU ACTONIT)TISMUCHBETTERTOMAKEASMALL ADJUSTMENTTOYOURLIFESTYLENOW THANTORISKAMAJOR CHANGEFORCEDBYILLNESSFARTHERDOWNTHELINE
i
4HENAMEOFTHEGAMEISTAKINGCAREOFYOURSELF BECAUSEYOUREGOINGTOLIVELONGENOUGHTOWISH YOUHAD
113_ED245_US 113 '')U;:(*+U9COAU'')
w
'RACE-IRABELLA
4! + %# ! 2 %/ &9/ 5 2 3 % , &
31/7/06 4:59:55 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0*+fc
,EARNFROM9OUR-ISTAKES 5NLESSYOUAREVERYLUCKY NOTEVERYSINGLESTEPALONG THEPATHTOYOURGOALWILLGOSMOOTHLY$EALWITH MISTAKESANDUNFORESEENPROBLEMSBYLOOKINGONTHEM ASOPPORTUNITIESFROMWHICHYOUCANLEARN
4AKE0ROBLEMSIN3TRIDE 7HENSOMETHINGDOESNOTTURNOUTASYOUEXPECTED ASK YOURSELFh7HATDO)NEEDTOLEARNFROMTHISvANDCREATE SOMEMENTALSPACEFORTHEANSWERTOCOMETOYOU!SKING THISQUESTIONMEANSTHATYOUWILLLEARNFROMMISTAKES)F YOUCHOOSENOTTOLEARNFROMAPARTICULARMISTAKE LIFEWILL KEEPSENDINGYOUMOREOPPORTUNITIESTOLEARNTHATLESSON UNTILYOUUNDERSTANDWHATITISTRYINGTOTELLYOU
2EMAIN2EALISTIC /NESURE lREWAYNOTTOLEARNFROMTHELESSONSTHATLIFE GIVESUSISTOPRETENDTHATTHEREARENOPROBLEMSATALL 3OMETIMES WHENTHINGSAREGOINGWELL ITCANSEEMAS THOUGHTHATISTHECASE"UTIFYOUBELIEVETHATEVERYTHING MUSTBEPERFECT THETEMPTATIONISTOIGNOREANYSIGNSTHAT
THINK
3-!24 3TAYONTRACKANDAVOIDUNPLEASANTSURPRISESBY MAKINGAhMINESWEEPvFROMTIMETOTIME TOCHECK FORANYTHINGTHATCOULDKNOCKYOUOFFCOURSE 4HEFUNCTIONOFAMINESWEEPISTOALERTYOUTOANYCHANGED CIRCUMSTANCESSINCEYOUSETYOURGOAL L
7HATHASNOTTURNEDOUTAS)EXPECTED
7HATDO)NEEDTOKEEPANEYEON 7HATNEEDSMYATTENTIONRIGHTNOW L7HATIFANYTHING AM)NOTADMITTINGTOMYSELF 4AKETHEAPPROPRIATEACTIONTODEALWITHANYCONCERNSTHAT THESEQUESTIONSHIGHLIGHTBEFOREMOVINGON L
L
' % 4 4 ) . ' 4 ( % 2 %
114_ED245_US 114 ''*U;:(*+U9COAU''*
31/7/06 4:59:56 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0*,fc
t
4%#(.)15%3 TOPRACTICE
4HISISAQUICKWAYTOBURST OUTOFTHEhSTUCKvFEELING THATCANHAPPENWHENYOU EXPERIENCEASETBACK )THELPSYOUTORECOVERYOUR EQUILIBRIUM REGAINYOURCONTROL ANDSTARTMOVINGFORWARDAGAIN 7HATSTANDSBETWEENYOU ANDYOURNEXTMILESTONE )DENTIFYASMANYELEMENTSOF THEPROBLEMASPOSSIBLE 4AKEEACHELEMENTANDDECIDE
WHETHERITISWITHINYOUR POWERTOlXITORNOT $ECIDEWHATYOUAREGOINGTO DOABOUTEACHELEMENTTHAT YOUCANlXANDDOIT $OESWHATISLEFTSTILLSTOP YOUFROMREACHINGYOUR MILESTONE)FITDOES ASKFOR HELP ORTAKEADIFFERENTROUTE TOGETTOYOURGOAL !SKYOURSELFWHATYOUNEEDTO LEARNFROMTHISEXPERIENCE
ITISNOT'ENERALLY THELONGERAPROBLEMISLEFTWITHOUT BEINGDEALTWITH THEMOREEFFORTITTAKESTOlX4HEOTHER DRAWBACKTOEXTREMEOPTIMISMISTHATITLEADSTOANEASILY DISTURBEDSTATEOFMIND7HENTHINGSDOGOWRONG IT BECOMESTOOEASYTOTAKEITPERSONALLY TORESENTTHEWORLD FORMAKINGYOUSUFFER ANDTOLOOKFOROTHERPEOPLETO BLAMENONEOFWHICHHELPSYOUTOSOLVETHEPROBLEM
!CCEPT5NCERTAINTY 7HENYOUACCEPTTHATLIFEISNOTPERFECT ITBECOMESEASIER TOSEEPROBLEMSCOMINGANDPREVENTTHEMFROM HAPPENING)TALSOENABLESYOUTOLEARNFROMWHATEVER HAPPENS/NCEYOUARECONlDENTTHATYOUWILLLEARNFROM WHATEVERTHEFUTUREBRINGS ALOTOFTHEREASONSFOR WORRYINGABOUTTHINGSGOINGWRONGWILLDISAPPEAR
4)0 )TISEASYTOFEELGOODABOUTYOURSELFWHEN
THINGSAREGOINGWELL9OUSHOWYOURTRUECHARACTERIN THESTRENGTHWITHWHICHYOURESPONDTOSETBACKS
115_ED245_US 115 ''+U;:(*+U9COAU''+
, % ! 2 .& 2 / -9/ 5 2- ) 3 4! + % 3
31/7/06 4:59:58 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0*.fc
"EYOND9OUR'OALS !SYOUMOVETOWARDYOURGOALS YOUAREALSOCHANGING YOURSELF4HEFARTHERYOUVENTUREBEYONDYOURCOMFORT ZONE THEMOREYOUWILLLEARNABOUTYOURSELFANDABOUT WHATITSPOSSIBLETODOINTHEWORLD
,OOKFOR7HAT-AKES9OU(APPY 2ESEARCHHASFOUNDTHATANIMPROVEMENTINMATERIAL CONDITIONSSUCHASALOTTERYWINORAPROMOTION BRINGSA TEMPORARYINCREASEINHAPPINESS BUTEVENTUALLYTHE RECIPIENTSHAPPINESSLEVELREVERTS TOAROUNDWHEREITSTARTED/NLY WHENAGAPATTHELOWERLEVELSOF !SONESET THE(IERARCHYOF.EEDSISlLLEDIS OFGOALSIS THEREAPERMANENTINCREASEIN ACHIEVED THE HAPPINESS,ASTINGHAPPINESS NEXTSET INVARIABLYCOMESFROMYOURINNER ATTITUDE9OURGOALSMAYCHANGE EMERGES ANDEVOLVEASYOUMOVETOWARD THEM FORTWOREASONS s BECAUSEYOUPICKUPMORERELEVANTINFORMATIONASYOU MOVETOWARDYOURGOALS s BECAUSEYOUYOURSELFAREEVOLVING 7ORKWITHTHISIFYOUHADNOTSETYOURORIGINALGOALS YOUWOULDNEVERHAVEFOUNDTHATYOUCANSETYOURSIGHTS HIGHER9OUMAYALSOCOMEUPAGAINSTCHALLENGESTHATYOU WOULDNOTHAVEENCOUNTEREDIFYOUHADSTAYEDINYOUR COMFORTZONE9OUNOWHAVEPLENTYOFSTRATEGIESFOR DEALINGWITHTHEMANDCANTACKLETHEMCONlDENTLY
%NJOYTHE&UTURE 7HATHAPPENSWHENYOUACHIEVETHEGOALSYOUHAVESET YOURSELF4HISISREALLYAQUESTIONTHATONLYYOURFUTURESELF CANANSWER7HENYOUACHIEVEYOURGOALS YOUWILLSEE NEWCHALLENGESANDNEWOPPORTUNITIESBEYONDANYTHING THATYOUCANNOWIMAGINEANDTHEONLYWAYYOUWILLSEE THESEWONDERFULPOSSIBILITIESISTOSTARTSERIOUSLYWORKING TOWARDTHEGOALSYOUHAVENOW ' % 4 4 ) . ' 4 ( % 2 %
116_ED245_US 116 '',U;:(*+U9COAU'',
31/7/06 4:59:59 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0+&fc
4HE(IERARCHYOF.EEDS 4HEFAMOUSPSYCHOLOGIST!BRAHAM-ASLOWINTRODUCEDTHE (IERARCHYOF.EEDSMODELOFHUMANMOTIVATION ANDITIS NOWWIDELYACCEPTEDASAPATTERNINTHEWAYINWHICHWE WORKTOWARDOURGOALS
%STEEM 3TATUSANDACHIEVEMENT
"ELONGING 2ELATIONSHIPSANDAFFECTION
3AFETY 0ROTECTIONANDSTABILITY
117_ED245_US 117 ''-U;:(*+U9COAU''-
3ELF ACTUALIZATION 0ERSONALGROWTHANDFULlLLMENT
4HEPRACTICALIMPLICATIONTHAT THEHIERARCHYOFNEEDSOFFERS FORYOURGOAL SETTINGISTHATYOU NEEDTOMAKESURETHEBASICS AREINPLACEBEFORESETTING YOURSELFMOREABSTRACTGOALS "EFORESETTINGANYGOALS CARRY OUTSOMECHECKSTOENSURE THATYOURlNANCES RELATIONSHIPS ANDHEALTHAREALLINGOODORDER ANDWORKINGWELL
4HE(IERARCHYOF.EEDS
9OUREADTHE(IERARCHYOF .EEDSFROMTHEBOTTOMBOX UPWARD4HEIDEABEHINDITIS THATOURGOALSWILLBEDIRECTED TOWARDSATISFYINGTHESENEEDSIN ORDER STARTINGWITHTHEMOST BASICFOODANDSHELTER)F SOMEONEISHOMELESS THEYARE UNLIKELYTOGIVEMUCHTHOUGHT TOSTATUSORSELF FULlLLMENTUNTIL THEYHAVEDEALTWITHTHEIRMOST PRESSINGNEEDS9OUWILLNOTICE THATTHELOWERLEVELSAREDRIVEN ENTIRELYBYhAWAYFROMv MOTIVATION WHILETHE MOTIVATIONATTHEHIGHESTLEVEL HASBECOMEENTIRELYhTOWARDv THEDESIREDGOAL
0HYSICALNEEDS &OODANDSHELTER
" % 9/ . $9/ 5 2' /! , 3
31/7/06 5:00:01 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0+'fc
)NDEX ACCEPTANCE UNCERTAINTY VALUING ANXIETY ELIMINATION APPRECIATIVEINQUIRY AUTOPILOT SWITCHINGOFF AWARENESS INCREASING hAWAYFROMvMOTIVATIONn BELIEFS ASFILTERS SELF FULFILLING BLAME SELF BLAME BODYLANGUAGE ENERGYBOOSTS BREATHING BECOMINGCALM MIND CLEARINGEXERCISE CAFFEINE GIVINGUP CAUSEANDEFFECTn CENTERYOURSELF CHECKLISTS GOAL SETTING CHOICE REMEMBERING COMMITMENT ENTHUSIASM COMPARISONS CONSEQUENCES GOAL ACHIEVING CONTINGENCYTIME COSTS ACHIEVINGGOALS #OVEY 3TEPHEN CREATIVITY FOSTERING CRITICISM DEALINGWITHn #SIKSZENTMIHALYI -IHALY DECLUTTERING DISPLACEMENTACTIVITIES DRAMA LIMIT EFFECTS 0/7%2n EMOTIONS ENGAGEMENT EXPRESSINGn GOALDISTINCTION PERSONALPOWER RECOGNITION ENERGY BOOSTS MAINTENANCEn EXERCISE FEELINGBETTER FAILURE CIRCLEOF LEARNINGFROMn SELF BLAME THINKFEEDBACK
FEEDBACK CRITICISM NOTFAILURE FILTERS BELIEFS FLEXIBILITY VALUES VIEWPOINTSn FLOATINGYOURGOALS hFLOWvSTATES FOCUS CENTERYOURSELF DESIREDOUTCOMESn ONFUTURE HABITESTABLISHMENT ONPRESENT WHATISWORKINGn WHATYOUWANTn FUTURE ENJOYING FOCUSON GOALPLACEMENTn LOOKINGAHEADn (ALO%FFECT HEALTH MAINTAININGn HIGHSANDLOWS CHARTING IMPACT CHANGEIMPLEMENTATION ENERGYMAINTENANCE HIGHSANDLOWS LOOKINGAHEAD USINGHELP IMPASSE BREAKING IMPORTANTTASKS VSURGENT INNERCLUTTER CLEARINGn INNERCRITIC DEALINGWITH INSTINCTS USINGn JOURNALS KEEPING JOURNEYS METAPHORS KNOWNROUTES 0/7%2 LANGUAGE hNOTvSTATEMENTS n LIMITINGBELIEFS DEFEATINGn LUCK MAKEYOUROWN -ASLOW !BRAHAM MEMORIES GOOD VIEWPOINTS MENTALENERGY DECLUTTERING INCREASING METAPHORS EXPRESSIONn NEGATIVE
) . $ % 8
Sec1_118_ED245_US 118 I[Y'U''.U;:(*+U9COAU''.
31/7/06 5:00:05 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0++fc
POSITIVE MIND CLEARINGEXERCISE MINESWEEPS MIRACLEQUESTION MONEY MOTIVATION SPECIFYGOALSn ASAVALUE MOTIVATION hAWAYFROMvn REINFORCING hTOWARDvn NEEDS HIERARCHY WANTDISTINCTION NEGATION n NEGATIVITY DIFFUSING NERVES BECOMINGCALM .IEBUHR 2EINHOLD OVERLOAD DEALINGWITHn OWNBUSINESS FUTURE OWNERSHIP 0/7%2 PERIPHERALVISION PERSONALPOWER DEVELOPINGn PERSPECTIVE OVERLOAD 0LACEBO%FFECT PLANNING LOOKINGAHEADn TREATS POSITIVETHINKING APPRECIATIONn ENERGYBOOSTS FEEDBACK 0/7%2n POSTURE CONFIDENCE ENERGYBOOSTS 0/7%2n PRESENTATIONS ANXIETYELIMINATION BECOMINGCALM PROBLEMS LEARNINGFROMn SOLVING n PROCRASTINATION STOPPING PROJECTION LEARNING PUBLICCOMMITMENT PUTTINGOFFTASKS 0YGMALION%FFECT QUESTIONS ASPIRATIONAL LIMITINGBELIEFS
Sec1_119_ED245_US 119 I[Y'U''/U;:(*+U9COAU''/
REALIZATIONOFGOALSn REHEARSAL NEWBELIEFS RELATIONSHIPS DEALINGWITHPEOPLEn PROBLEMSOLVING RELAXATION BECOMINGCALM INNERCLUTTER INNERSANCTUARY PROBLEMSOLVING TIMELINES RESPONSIBILITY TAKINGn 2OSENTHAL 2OBERT RUTS GETTINGOUTOF METAPHORS 3-!24GOALS SANCTUARY BUILDING SCALE PROBLEMS SELF RECOGNITION SELF ASSESSMENTOFSKILLS n SELF AWARENESS DEVELOPINGn RAISING SELF BLAME SELF EFFICACY3EEPERSONALPOWER SELF ESTEEM BOOSTING SELF IMAGE LIVINGUPTOn SELF SABOTAGE SELF TALK LIMITINGBELIEFS 3ERENITY0RAYER SETBACKSn SETTINGGOALSn SOLUTIONFOCUS SPECIFYINGGOALSn STRENGTHS KNOWYOURn PLAYINGTOn STRESS 3EEALSORELAXATION BECOMINGCALM POSITIVITY REDUCTION 4HORNDIKE %DWARD TIMEHORIZON TIMEMANAGEMENT TIMELINESn n PERSPECTIVE WORKINGBACKWARD TIMETABLES hTOWARDvMOTIVATIONn TRIGGERS DEFUSING UNCERTAINTY ACCEPTANCE
) . $ % 8
31/7/06 5:00:06 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0+,fc
UNCONSCIOUS BADHABITS DRAMA ENGAGING GOALINSTALLATION hNOTvSTATEMENTS n POWEROFn TIMEORGANIZATION URGENTTASKS VSIMPORTANT VALUES CONFLICTS n HIERARCHY KNOWINGn PERSONALSCALE
VIEWPOINTS CHANGING DISPUTESn VISUALIZATION COMPELLINGGOALSn DIFFUSINGNEGATIVITY NEWBELIEFS SPECIFYINGGOALSn TIMELINES VALUECONFLICT VIEWPOINTALTERATION WANTS NEEDDISTINCTION WILLPOWER WRITINGGOALSDOWN
0ICTURE#REDITS
4HEPUBLISHERWOULDLIKETOTHANKTHEFOLLOWINGFORTHEIRKINDPERMISSIONTO REPRODUCETHEIRPHOTOGRAPHS!BBREVIATIONSKEYL LEFT C CENTER R RIGHT T TOP B BELOW CL CENTERLEFT CR CENTERRIGHT (OLGER7INKLERZEFA#ORBISL 2EG#HARITY#ORBISC 3TEPHEN4ONER'ETTYR *OHANNES+ROEMER'ETTY!DRIAN4URNERT #REATAS0HOTOLIBRARYCOMC !DRIAN4URNERB 0ETER#ADE)CONICA'ETTY%RIC7ESSMAN)CONICA'ETTY !LT !LAMYL %RICKA-C#ONNELL4HE)MAGE"ANK'ETTYCL 'HISLAINAND-ARIE $AVIDDE,OSSY'ETTYCR *IM#RAIGMYLE#ORBISR ©0HILIPPE2OYER(/! 15))MAGESTATE2ANDY&ARIS#ORBIS!DRIAN4URNER%RICKA-C#ONNELL 4HE)MAGE"ANK'ETTY#REATAS0HOTOLIBRARYCOM(OLGER7INKLERZEFA #ORBIS2OMMEL-ASTERlLE!DRIAN7EINBRECHT4AXI'ETTY-ATTHIAS #LAMER'ETTY#OMSTOCK0REMIUM!LAMY"RAD7ILSON)CONICA'ETTY "UTCH-ARTIN'ETTY#HABRUKEN4AXI'ETTY3TEPHEN4ONER3TONE'ETTY 2EG#HARITY#ORBIS'HISLAIN-ARIE$AVIDDE,OSSY'ETTY#HUCK %LLIOTT4HE)MAGE"ANK'ETTY!DRIAN4URNER*IM#RAIGMYLE#ORBIS %RIC7ESSMAN)CONICA'ETTY#OLIN(AWKINS'ETTY !LLOTHERIMAGES©$ORLING+INDERSLEY &ORFURTHERINFORMATIONSEEWWWDKIMAGESCOM
!UTHORS!CKNOWLEDGMENTS
4HEWORKOF3TEPHEN#OVEY IN4HE(ABITSOF(IGHLY%FFECTIVE0EOPLE ANDOF -IHALY#SIKSZENTMIHALY IN&LOWWASHELPFUL4HE0/7%2PROCESSDESCRIBEDIN #HAPTERWASORIGINALLYDEVELOPEDBY5+MANAGEMENTCONSULTANTANDCOACH *ENNY&LINTOFT
!UTHORS"IOGRAPHY
!.$93-)4(ISANEMOTIONALINTELLIGENCECOACHANDTRAINERSPECIALIZINGIN.,0 .EURO ,INGUISTIC0ROGRAMMING (EHASBEENRUNNINGTHE#REATETHE,IFE9OU7ANT WORKSHOPFORTHELASTTENYEARS ANDWORKSWITHBOTHPRIVATEANDCORPORATECLIENTS AMONGTHEM3ONY 'LAXO3MITH+LINE ANDTHE5+.ATIONAL(EALTH3ERVICE(EHAS WRITTENFORPUBLICATIONSINCLUDING4HE*OURNALOF0RIMARY#ARE-ENTAL(EALTHAND 4HE4HERAPIST(ISCOMPANY #OACHING,EADERS,TD ALSORUNS.,00RACTITIONERAND -ASTER0RACTITIONERTRAININGIN-ANCHESTER %NGLAND&URTHERDETAILSAREAVAILABLE FROMWWWPRACTICALEQCOM&REEDOWNLOADABLERESOURCESTOSUPPORTTHISBOOKARE ALSOAVAILABLEATWWWCREATETHELIFEYOUWANTCOUK
) . $ % 8
Sec1_120_ED245_US 120 I[Y'U'(&U;:(*+U9COAU'(&
31/7/06 5:00:06 pm ''%*%&,,0*&0+-fc