A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna
A
story, you say?” the traveling bard asked with a flourish, his patchwork cloak ...
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna
A
story, you say?” the traveling bard asked with a flourish, his patchwork cloak billowing behind him at the gesture.
“Aye, and one we have not heard a hundred times or more,” the king replied. “Ah, ’tis a new story you want to hear,” the minstrel drawled, glancing around the room, meeting gazes and measuring his audience. This was not a tale he dared tell in every court. “I think perhaps I have one that you have not heard before. ’Tis not a tale for the faint of heart, though. Will you hear me out to the end?” “Tell your story, bard,” the king commanded. “As you wish,” the storyteller said with a bow. “Sit back and relax as I give you the legend of the rose among the ruins.”
“A TOAST to our future queen?” Rhicer of Zennor looked up, startled out of his perusal of the Mordyn Sea. He smiled when he saw his friend Kanath 1
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna standing there, a bottle of wine and two goblets in hand. “Of course,” he replied with a twisted smile. “How could I not toast the woman whose marriage will end the bloodshed in our beautiful Ageselm?” Kanath chuckled, hearing the note of cynicism in his friend’s voice. They had fought together since before Kanath should have been old enough to carry a sword, but it had been fight or find himself carried off into slavery. Emyl, Prince of Ageselm, had insisted Kanath and the other youths learn to defend themselves early, attiring them in soldier’s garb as early as their thirteenth summer so that the Mordyn warriors who came to collect tribute would leave them behind. The warriors wanted farmers for slaves, not soldiers. The recent defeat of Donnchadh’s general had forced the Mordyn king into negotiation, a discussion that ended the war in return for Emyl’s marriage to the Mordyn princess and their ascendance to the throne. Rhicer had been quite vocal, at least in private, about his disapproval of the wedding. He hated to see the girl, for she was younger even than Kanath, bartered off like so much chattel. Kanath had retorted that Prince Emyl would treat her far better than she undoubtedly deserved and that her small sacrifice would allow thousands to live in peace. They had agreed to disagree. “Open the bottle, then,” Kanath urged, handing it to the older man. Rhicer glanced at the wax seal at the mouth of the bottle. “A rosebud,” he mused aloud. “I am not familiar with that seal.” “Nor am I,” Kanath agreed. “The bottle was among the gifts intended for the court. I saw no harm in starting early.”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Rhicer laughed aloud this time. It was a discussion he and Kanath engaged in regularly. “One day, my friend, your light-fingered ways will get us killed.” “Surely not,” Kanath retorted playfully. “I never take anything valuable.” Still chuckling, Rhicer opened the bottle and poured a measure into each of the goblets Kanath held. Clinking their glasses together, they lifted the cups to their lips and drank. The wine was sweet, far sweeter than anything they had tasted before, but not cloyingly so. Intrigued by the unique flavor, both men sipped again, letting the heady aroma flood their senses, intoxicating them. “This is extraordinary wine,” Rhicer observed, pouring more into the two cups. “Were there more bottles with this insignia?” Kanath frowned in concentration as he mentally recreated the stores from which he had picked the bottle. “There were many different sigils, but I do not remember seeing another like this,” he admitted. “Too bad,” Rhicer lamented. “I would have enjoyed this brew again.” “Let us make the most of the bottle we do have,” Kanath declared. “We can inquire about its origins, but I do not know if the treaty between our country and Mordyna will allow for much trade. In time, perhaps, but for now, I suspect the end of hostilities is all we can hope for.” Rhicer smiled. “I see your days spent at Tinrelm’s side were not completely wasted,” he teased. “You did not used to be so skilled in statecraft.”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “Prince Emyl would see us all masters of our fate,” he replied archly. “And that means knowing more than just sword craft.” “Well do I know it,” Rhicer agreed. “I did not say I disagreed with your lessons or your understanding of the situation. Only that such sentiments, such awareness are unusual in one as young as you.” This, too, was a familiar discussion. Rhicer maintained that wisdom could only come from age and experience rather than from being taught. The contrast between Kanath’s political acumen and his habit of borrowing things without permission was perfect proof of that. He took another sip of his wine, feeling lassitude settle into his bones. A niggling thought told him he should be concerned, given how little wine he had drunk, but he could not seem to focus on that, finishing his cup instead. “Another toast,” he proposed, holding his goblet out for Kanath to fill. Kanath refilled their cups willingly and set the bottle aside again. “And what shall we toast this time?” Rhicer smiled. “To a world where young men do not have to learn to fight to survive and young women do not have to fear being dragged off into servitude or worse. To a world where children are allowed to be children and the course of love runs true.” The first part of the toast did not surprise Kanath at all. Rhicer had always hated the lengths Lord Emyl had found necessary to save the youths from being taken as slaves. Young men taught to fight as soon as they could hold a toy sword. Young women spirited away from their families in hidden enclaves to keep them from being taken. He could not save them all, though, and that bred resentment in the families whose children were taken captive. Lord Emyl took 4
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna every loss, every hard, angry word personally, and it weighed on him enormously. That Rhicer would toast an end to such exigencies was no surprise at all. The last part did surprise Kanath, though. The canny warrior showed a hardened shell to the world, battle-weary and cynical. Kanath had not even known the other soldier believed in love. He drank, though, for he did believe in it, did believe that somewhere out there his soul mate awaited him. He had only to find her. Perhaps now, he could begin his search. Rhicer sipped too, wondering where such sentiments had come from. He had given up on love two decades ago, when the girl he loved had been raped by Mordyn warriors and had committed suicide when she realized she was pregnant. He had begged her to marry him, to let him claim the child as his own, even if he never touched her. He did not care. He simply wanted her at his side. None of his pleading, none of his offers, had penetrated her desperation, and he had watched helplessly as she threw herself from the cliffs into the sea. Heartbroken, he had sworn vengeance on all Mordyn and had spent the intervening years keeping that vow. He had guarded his heart carefully since that day, refusing to let any woman close. His need for sex, he had assuaged with the camp followers and loose women of the court who expected nothing more than a quick tumble and a little coin. The desire for companionship, he satisfied through his friendships with other soldiers: Rynes, when he needed the wisdom of years, and Kanath when he wanted the optimism of youth. His plan had served him well, allowing him to live in relative contentment in recent years, especially now that peace was nigh. It made his words all the more bizarre.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “Do you believe in love?” Kanath asked. “Is that how you will spend your days now that we are free of the threat of Mordyna?” Rhicer snorted. “Free?” he challenged. “We will be free of them when Donnchadh is dead and burned. We will be free when a generation of children grows up without fear. We will be free when no one alive remembers the terror of these days. No, I will spend the next twenty years as I have spent the last: defending our borders and our people.” Kanath's face fell. He had hoped to be able to pursue his own dreams of love, but he would not desert his comrades to go on such a quest. Prince Emyl had trained him well. The safety and security of their home was first in his mind and heart. If fighting remained to be done, he would stay and do it. Rhicer cursed under his breath, seeing the change in Kanath's demeanor. “Do not listen to me, Kanath. You know I am a bitter old man. There is no reason for you to resign yourself to a soldier's life just because I have no care for a different future. You are young still. You should find a pretty lass and settle down, make beautiful children who can grow up free from fear.” “You think my children will be beautiful?” Kanath teased, preening jokingly at the compliment. “I didn't think you'd noticed.” Rhicer laughed in turn. “I'm not blind, am I?” His face grew serious again. “All children are beautiful, Kanath, a gift to all around them. You don't have to be ruled by my cynicism.” The wine loosened Kanath's tongue, giving him the courage to ask, “Why don't you believe in love?” 6
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Rhicer grimaced, casting about for a way to avoid answering the question. In spite of his intentions, he found himself opening his mouth and answering. “The woman I loved took her own life, despite my pleas for her to stay with me. She didn't believe I loved her, didn't believe I could love her after what happened.” “What happened?” “Donnchadh,” Rhicer spat. “Oh, not him personally, I'm sure, but it was early in the war, when the fighting was still fierce, before we wore their yoke so firmly. His soldiers raided our village. I had not come to court yet at that time. They kidnapped her and kept her for weeks, then released her to live with the ignominy of being a Mordyn whore. I told her it didn't matter, but she didn't believe me. My beautiful, spirited Eldvese, broken by those dirty curs. She wouldn't let me touch her anymore—not a kiss, not a caress, not even an embrace. I wasn't going to let them win, though. I stayed at her side, only leaving her to tend to her personal needs and mine. I was there when she realized she was pregnant.” Kanath flinched at that news. “I'm so sorry.” “I wasn't, though,” Rhicer explained. “The child was still a gift, regardless of how it was conceived. The baby was supposed to be a reason for her to fight, to live. I offered to marry her, to tell everyone the baby was mine, that we had been intimate before she was taken and since her return. I wasn't being noble, Kanath. I wanted that baby. It was a part of her and so it was mine. She didn't see it that way, though. To her, it was one final curse. She slipped from the room as I dozed, running to the cliffs. I woke and followed her in time to see her throw herself off, taking not only her life, but that of the child inside her.”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Kanath's eyes closed against the pain in Rhicer's voice. “I didn't know.” “Almost nobody does,” Rhicer replied slowly. “Prince Emyl does, and Rynes. I'm not sure I've ever told anyone else.” Kanath nodded. “I'm honored to be in such company.” Rhicer smiled absently, aware of a curious change in himself. Always before, the mere thought of Eldvese had been enough to send him to the bottle, a drunken rampage that would last for days, usually until Prince Emyl and Rynes locked him in a room and dried him out. It had been years since he had allowed himself to consider those days at all. Tonight, he had spoken of her aloud, something he had not done since the first drunken stupor, when Prince Emyl and Rynes had demanded an explanation, yet he felt no urge to flee, to escape into liquor. Perhaps time truly did heal all wounds. Even so, his thoughts of Eldvese and the babe were not happy ones. He drained the cup and held it out again. “This wine is too good to waste. Pour me another glass.” Kanath complied, not entirely sure it was a good idea, but he would not be the one to deny the other knight. He doubted few besides Rynes or the prince would dare. He drained his own goblet, refilling it when he saw a little wine still remained. He sipped at it more slowly, suddenly feeling the effects of what he had already drunk. It was a night for surprises, it seemed, for two quaffs, even in such rapid succession, should not have had such a strong effect. “This is a most potent vintage,” he slurred casually, shifting to prop himself against the spar of the boat. “Weakling,” Rhicer joked, though privately, he admitted Kanath was right. Watching his companion shift uncomfortably, he stretched out his arm. “Come over here 8
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna and lean on me before you fall over and hurt yourself. Our prince would not be happy with me if I brought you home damaged.” “Damaged, my arse,” Kanath retorted, but he moved to lean against Rhicer's solid shoulder nonetheless. He shifted, finding the crook of his friend's neck to rest his head. “Sleepy,” he murmured. “Rest then,” Rhicer urged. “We're not on watch.” If they had been, he never would have opened the bottle. In the middle of the sea as they were, he did not expect any trouble, but duty was duty, and that came above all else. He could not count the number of times he and Kanath had relaxed this way, leaning against each other for support and warmth through long nights of keeping watch or holding vigil, snatching what sleep they could as they waited for the signal to move out, either in attack or in retreat. It was familiar, comfortable, easy. He shifted a little, settling Kanath's head more comfortably against his collarbone and spreading his cloak over both their bodies to keep away the chill of the ocean breeze. He leaned back against the side of the boat and let sleep take him as well, confident that the soldiers on watch would alert them should the need arise.
WARM. Sweet. Soft.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Rhicer stirred in his sleep, those sensations mingling with his dreams. He could not see his lover's face, but he could smell the sweet scent of arousal, feel the heavy warmth of entwining limbs. He turned his head, nuzzling the curls that brushed his lips. His arms tightened, pulling the pliant body closer, desire growing as he felt the way his lover's frame pressed willingly against his. He wanted to roll the warm form beneath him and bury himself in the welcoming depths. His lover pulled him closer, wrapping him in a heated embrace. Kanath sighed in his sleep, welcoming the feel of loving arms after being alone so long. He went eagerly, wanting more contact. His hand shifted, moving over clothcovered flesh, stroking gently, enticing his lover closer. Fingers moved over his chest, finding sensitive spots, teasing and arousing. Rhicer arched into the touch, angling his body so the urgent caress teased his aching nipple. He bent his head, tipping his lover's head back, seeking skin rather than silky hair. He wanted to smell, to taste, to learn every inch of his lover's visage. Kanath's head fell back, exposing his features to his lover's mouth. Warm lips passed over his forehead and cheekbones, the bridge of his nose and his closed eyelids, down to his jaw. His lips parted in invitation, but his lover did not see or did not care, choosing instead to tease the skin of his neck, behind his ear, nipping gently at his earlobe. He moaned softly at the alternately soothing and arousing sensation. Wanting to encourage his lover, he slid his hand up, seeking the neckline of his lover's blouse, determined to return pleasure for pleasure. His fingers slid beneath the loose cloth, immediately finding warm skin. He caressed it gently, seeking the swell of a sweet breast. The feeling of rough hair beneath his palm instead shattered the 10
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna illusion. Kanath's eyes flew open, finding himself entwined exactly as in his dream, hand against skin, lips against his neck, arms holding him close, but ’twas no tender miss whose arms embraced him. Horrified, he pushed hard, scrambling backward away from Rhicer. His lover's sudden, violent withdrawal started Rhicer awake. “What the fuck?” he muttered, seeing Kanath staring at him with an unreadable look on his face. “You… I… we…,” Kanath stuttered, unable even to put into words what he feared had just passed between them. “What is it, Kanath?” Rhicer asked pointedly, his annoyance at having been forced out of such a heated dream coming through clearly in his voice. Kanath struggled with what to say. Rhicer obviously did not realize what had happened. He was annoyed but not mortified like Kanath himself was. He debated not saying anything, but to his dismay, warring with his embarrassment was a strong desire to snuggle back into the other warrior's embrace and pick back up where they left off. “Were you dreaming?” he inquired finally. Rhicer had no idea what that had to do with anything, but he nodded anyway. “So was I,” Kanath said slowly, “except that I wasn't just dreaming.” Uncomfortable now as he remembered how vivid the sensations were in his dream, Rhicer looked at his young friend sharply. “What do you mean?” Kanath flushed and looked away. “I woke up with my hand inside your shirt, your arms tight around me, your lips on my neck.” 11
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Revulsion contorted Rhicer's face, long ingrained prejudice surging to the fore. He kept himself from scrambling away by force of will alone, embarrassed to realize that one part of him wanted to scramble in the other direction. “’Twas the wine,” he rationalized immediately, determined to explain away the impulse. “We drank too much and lost track of where we were, of who we were with.” “We had three mugs apiece,” Kanath retorted. “We have drunk twice that before, fallen asleep side by side, and never woken up… like that.” His lips curled into an expression of disgust as he thought about it, deliberately ignoring the part of his libido that screamed for more, screamed for Rhicer's touch. Any touch would do, he reassured himself firmly. He simply needed to find a camp follower and sate his lust with her, the way he was supposed to. He was not attracted to his longtime friend. He was not. ’Twas the circumstances. “You said yourself it was an unusually potent brew,” Rhicer reminded him, mentally scrambling for purchase in this newly changed landscape. “It went to your head far more quickly than I have ever seen wine do before. It has to be the wine, Kanath. It could be nothing else.” He pushed aside the welling panic at realizing that the desire he had felt in his sleep had not faded. That gave Kanath pause. Why was he arguing against it being the wine? He most certainly did not want it to be anything else, anything… real. That would be unthinkable. Men did not engage in such activities together. No one at court would tolerate it. He nodded slowly. “You're right, of course. It was the wine.” He sat back down, keeping a respectable distance but trying not to make it any greater than he usually would. He did not want Rhicer probing his unease, asking why he was still so on edge. His only answer, if he told the truth, was the inexplicable desire to sit closer, 12
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna to snuggle up to the other man's warmth, an impulse he dared not indulge. At the very least, such desires would see him cast out from the court, bereft of the prince's protection as well as of the only home he had ever known. At the worst… he pushed away images of men tortured, maimed to stop their unnatural desires. He had never heard of such atrocities in Prince Emyl's realm, though he knew some of the other tribes were not so civilized. He knew better, if Rhicer asked, than to lie. He had never been able to keep a secret from the blond warrior once his friend made up his mind to learn it. Rhicer could read him as easily as he read tracks on the forest floor. No, the only solution was to keep Rhicer from asking in the first place, and that meant acting like nothing had changed. He shook his head slightly. Nothing had changed. He wanted no more from Rhicer than he had yesterday morning, or the morning before that, or the morning before that. Rhicer breathed a sigh of relief. He did not want to discuss what had happened between them, however inadvertently, did not want to examine the emotions chasing themselves around his head like crazed rabbits. He wanted to fall back into the world of dreams where a gentle, female lover welcomed him with open arms. He wanted to close his eyes and see Eldvese's beautiful face, smiling at him as she had once done, before Donnchadh's soldiers changed her. He wanted to pull Kanath back into his arms and finish what they had started. His eyes did close at that thought, shock running through him as he tried unsuccessfully to dismiss the emotion. The first two, he could indulge, but not the last. Never the last. He had worked too hard for his position at court, his military command, to sacrifice it now for such perverted pleasures. He had never found his soldiers
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna attractive, even one as handsome, objectively, as Kanath. Could he list the lads who were likely to be popular with the ladies because of their looks? Of course, but he had never had any interest in them himself. He had always looked toward the women, appreciating their softness and sweet, gentle curves. Kanath's hair had been soft, the skin of his neck as sweet as any he had ever tasted…. Rhicer shook his head, rejecting the wayward thought. He was not going to do this, not going to ruin a valued friendship over a momentary lapse of sanity. His heart twinged at the thought of losing Kanath's friendship. The young man was a breath of fresh air in Rhicer's staid existence. For so long, he had trusted only Rynes and Prince Emyl, had allowed no one else close, even as friends, though he had plenty of acquaintances among the other soldiers. Then a few years ago, the prince had promoted a promising young soldier to second in command of Rhicer's patrol. He had protested because of the man's youth, but Emyl had insisted, and Rhicer had slowly gained another friend. Kanath kept him on his toes with his antics, yet the younger man surprised him as well with his grasp of tactics. Together, they made a formidable pair. Only Tinrelm's patrol had more success against the Mordyn, a title Rhicer had no interest in trying to wrest from their prince’s chosen heir. A sudden bustle on the deck drew their attention. Grateful to have anything to think about other than the unwanted, unwelcome desire that had swamped them during the night, both men rose to see what was going on. They immediately recognized Princess Nische’s maidservant.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Looking at each other with concern, they approached her. “What is wrong, Bragnae?” Rhicer asked kindly. “You seem troubled.” “It’s gone missing!” Bragnae wailed, wringing her hands in frustration. “Whatever it is, it can’t have gone far,” Kanath pointed out reasonably. “If it was on the ship yesterday, ’tis still on the ship this morning. Tell us what is missing and we will help you look.” “Oh, no! I couldn’t do that!” she protested. “’Tis a secret, only meant to be shared with the princess and her bridegroom on their wedding night.” Rhicer frowned. “Something as valuable as that should certainly be found immediately. Are you sure you cannot tell us? We would be discreet, of course. We are in the prince’s confidence. He would surely share with us later the nature of the secret.” Bragnae tugged nervously on the end of her braid, but in the end, she suspected they were right. If she had any hope of finding the love potion before some hapless soldier drank the brew and found himself irrevocably in love, she would need help. There were parts of the ship she would not be able to search on her own. “’Tis a bottle of wine,” she told them softly, “but not any bottle of wine. It has a rose in the wax seal.” Rhicer’s heart pounded suddenly in his chest. “And what makes this wine so special?” he asked, leaning forward to speak softly enough so that only Kanath would be able to hear.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “It is a love potion,” she explained, embarrassed. “Nische’s mother made it for her to share with her husband to ensure a happy marriage for them. If someone else drank it….” She trailed off, not wanting to even imagine the imbroglio that could cause. Rhicer heard the smothered gasp from his friend and fellow soldier. “A rose seal, you say?” he repeated, though his own stomach was clenching at the thought. “We can certainly look for the bottle. Someone must have taken it from the stores, not realizing what it was. If you return below, we will bring it to you when we find it.” Bragnae nodded slowly, relieved to be free of that responsibility. “I will be with my mistress,” she told them. As soon as they were alone, Rhicer turned to Kanath. “Do not say a word,” he ordered. “Let me think.” Kanath held his tongue, his thoughts racing. A love potion. It would explain everything that had passed between them, but it also meant…. His face fell. He could not be in love with Rhicer. As much as he liked and respected the older man, he wanted a home, a family, children. Had he condemned them both to a life of misery with his thoughtless actions? There had to be a way out of this, Rhicer mused. Every potion had an antidote. Any herbalist knew that. It was simply a question of finding one who knew the antidote to this one. “What happened to the bottle?” he asked softly. “I don’t know,” Kanath replied. “I guess it’s still where we were sleeping.” “Get it and hide it,” Rhicer ordered. “If she is right and we did drink a love potion, we will need whatever remains in
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna the bottle to find a way to reverse the spell. No one can know.” “Do you think I don’t know that?” Kanath snapped. “You, at least, had a chance at real love instead of some… spell. If we can’t find a way out of this, I will never know what it’s like to truly love someone. So forgive me if I’m a little on edge.” Rhicer’s face turned thoughtful. He had considered his own discomfort with the situation, quite sure Kanath’s matched it. He had not, however, considered their words from the night before, considered that Kanath was still young enough to look for love. “I’m sorry,” he said, “but if you hadn’t—” “If I hadn’t,” Kanath retorted. “Fine. Blame it on me. Yes, I took a bottle of wine, one among many, but you drank too, Rhicer. You didn’t have to have any. You didn’t have to share it with me. That was your choice.” He stormed off, grabbing the bottle from where it lay next to their cloaks, still entangled from the night. Scowling over his shoulder, Kanath grabbed his garment too, and stalked off, leaving a very bemused Rhicer in his wake. With a groan, the blond sank to the deck of the ship and buried his face in his knees. What the hell were they supposed to do now? He pushed aside the desire to go after Kanath, to pull the young man into his arms and apologize, showering his face with kisses until his apology was accepted. That impulse came from the potion, and he had no intention of giving in to it. On the other hand, he could not leave things unsettled between them. Kanath was his right hand when it came to their patrol, the two of them working together so seamlessly that he often imagined they could read each other’s minds. He refused to lose that. Regardless 17
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna of what the elixir made him feel, he was still the master of his own actions. Rising from where he crouched, he went in search of Kanath. The ship was small enough that the young man would not be able to hide for long. Angry at himself, Kanath huddled in a dank, unused corner of the hold. Rhicer had told him a hundred times not to borrow things without asking first. He had always laughed it off, insisting that no one would notice one missing bottle, one small knife, one plain sword. His friend would shrug at his flippancy and tell him that one day he would surely regret it. He regretted it now, and not only was he paying the price for it, but Rhicer was as well, something that struck Kanath as incredibly unfair. His friend deserved better than that, better than to be stuck with an irresponsible youth with no more sense than to steal a love potion meant for his lord and lady. Rhicer deserved… he could not even make himself think it, not with the magic herbs pumping in his veins, affecting his every thought. Whatever, whomever Rhicer might deserve, Kanath wanted him for himself. His eyes closed as he remembered what it felt like to wake up in Rhicer’s arms, to have the warrior’s strong body next to his, almost beneath his, cradling him, supporting him. The flat, hair-dusted chest had felt strange that morning, accustomed as he was to a woman’s body next to his, but now his fingers itched to feel it again, to learn its contours and sensitivities. Would Rhicer’s nipples be as sensitive as Kanath’s own? Would he take the time to linger and allow Kanath to do the same? He had heard enough gossip among the women of the court to know that Rhicer was a favorite among them, always conscientious and courteous, ensuring their pleasure before finding his own.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Would he treat Kanath the same way, caring for a male lover as generously as he had cared for a female? Blinking at his wayward thoughts, Kanath grimaced. He would never find out. Even if he could work his own mind around the mechanics of making love with a man, he could never ask Rhicer to consider it. It was unthinkable! His friend was still in love with a woman dead twenty years! He would never truly want anything to do with Kanath. He was already talking about finding a way to break the spell. And that was the right way to deal with the situation. There was simply no other choice. “Kanath?” he heard Rhicer’s voice calling. “What are you doing down here?” “Hiding,” Kanath admitted. “Thinking.” “And what were you thinking?” Rhicer asked. He did not have to ask what the young man was hiding from. “Do you know someone who can break the potion?” “I think so,” Rhicer replied. “North of the village where I grew up, there lives an old woman and her daughter. People go to them when they’re sick, when they think they’ve been cursed, when they need assistance. They’re the only ones I know who might be able to help us.” “We have to go and see them, then,” Kanath declared. “As soon as we can get away from court. We cannot let this continue.” “I know,” Rhicer said, a note of sadness creeping into his voice. He knew the feelings in his chest were not real, that they were brought on by that damned potion, but it had been so long since he felt anything but desolation. The idea of returning to that after knowing the warm flush of love 19
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna again was disheartening. “We’ll go as soon as we land. There are enough soldiers to escort Princess Nische to court and we have enough standing that Lord Emyl will accept our word that we had an urgent errand that could not wait. As long as we do not miss the wedding, two weeks hence, he will forgive us a short absence.” Kanath looked up at Rhicer with pleading eyes. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. “You always told me I’d get myself in trouble if I kept taking things. I didn’t mean to get you in trouble too.” Rhicer waved a dismissive hand. “We have other things to worry about than casting blame,” he insisted. “What’s done is done.” “This will not… change us, will it?” the young man asked. “I mean, when the spell is broken, we will go back to desiring women rather than men, right? We will again be the good friends we always were, without this… tension between us.” “Of course,” Rhicer assured his lieutenant, inwardly praying for just such an occurrence. He could deal with many things, even losing his desire to bed the women of the court, but he could not deal with losing Kanath.
ALL of Ageselm turned out in celebration of the union of
Prince Emyl and Nische, Princess of Mordyna, their union securing peace in the land and allowing Emyl to claim the throne. The court celebrated within the keep, the rest of the
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna populace accommodated in pavilions outside. The night was cool and clear, the moon full as spring turned to summer, an auspicious time, according to the local sages, for such an important wedding. Outside, the peasants danced and made merry, while inside the priest spoke the words of blessing on the couple. Though no one spoke of it in the cleric’s presence, everyone understood that they would be blessed again, much later, in the ways of the pagan gods. Rhicer stood restlessly in the back of the chapel, his hand clutching the hilt of his sword. Until the wedding vows were spoken and the marriage consummated, he would not drop his guard. Nothing could disrupt this historic moment, not even his own wild longings. He and Kanath had done as they agreed, leaving the princess’s entourage as soon as the ship landed, having told Bragnae that the potion was nowhere to be found, that it had surely been consumed by some hapless solider and the bottle thrown overboard to hide the evidence. She had been distraught at the idea, insisting that they find out who it was so she could explain the situation to him. They promised they would tell her if they saw anyone acting strangely, confident enough in their self-control to hide their growing feelings for each other from her. They had not discussed it again, not wanting to risk being overheard, but each had been aware of what was developing between them, spurred on by a potion too powerful to ignore. Rhicer caught himself staring at Kanath at odd times, watching his fellow soldier with a possessiveness that could not be explained away as anything other than love. He told himself it was the elixir working in
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna him, but it did not make the feelings less real or less demanding. Occasionally, he would sense Kanath’s eyes on him as well. He tried not to turn at those moments and seek out the young man, tried to maintain the pretense that nothing had changed between them. Sometimes, he succeeded, but just as often, he did not, his eyes meeting Kanath’s with unerring accuracy, as if he instinctively knew where to find his lieutenant. He refused to consider that he might be subconsciously keeping track of the younger man. That he had done just that, consciously, with Eldvese when he was courting her, made him all the more determined to chalk his awareness up to his usual battle-ready wits. He had succeeded to some extent while they were still on the ship. Once they had reached shore and headed north, it had grown ever more difficult. They traveled alone to see the witches, and without the buffer of other soldiers and their duties between them, their burgeoning desire grew progressively more difficult to ignore. It started simply enough with the everyday gestures of assistance that had become second nature between them long before they ever drank the potion. Kanath would hand him something and their fingers would brush. Rhicer found himself asking the other man to pass him things just to have that excuse for contact, however fleeting. Kanath had not helped either, his breath catching almost imperceptibly each time, little gasps that went straight to Rhicer’s loins and his heart, making him want to hear them again. Nighttime had been the worst, lying side by side in their tent, shivering from the chill yet afraid to scoot closer to share warmth for fear of what else would transpire between them. The distance between their bodies had not stopped Kanath’s face from haunting Rhicer’s dreams, the little 22
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna breaths magnified in his imagination until they were fullfledged cries of passion. The dream lover from the ship returned each night, no longer faceless, but graced with Kanath’s features, transfigured with desire as he responded to Rhicer’s every touch, every kiss and caress. He woke each morning painfully hard, painfully aware of how close the object of his desire lay, how easy it would be to roll over and take the other man in his arms. Kanath would not turn him away. The love potion was torturing the younger man as surely as it was Rhicer himself. One move, one inviting gesture, and he knew what would happen. And he knew they would both regret it later. The potion was working on them, twisting their emotions and desires, but it could not twist their reality. It could not make an affair between them more acceptable. It could not give them a place in court or in the military if the truth became known. It could not give Kanath his dream of a family. Rhicer did not even consider his own forgotten hopes. He had set them aside after Eldvese died, unwilling to take the risk of loving and losing again. He had dreamed of other things, of a place at court, of a rank in the military. The potion threatened both of those ambitions if he indulged the pointless desire that had sprung up between them. And while he did not know for sure, he feared that every innocent touch only deepened the hold the elixir had on them. If that was true, then making a reality of the dreams that tormented him would surely cement the magic so fully it could never be undone. It had taken them three days to reach the house of Mistress Rodard, three long days of riding side by side, casting yearning glances at each other from the corners of their eyes, three long nights of struggling not to roll into each
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna other’s arms and sate the passion that simmered along their nerves. The wise woman had examined the bottle carefully when they had haltingly explained the situation. “A rose sigil?” she asked after sniffing the contents. “Yes, a rosebud,” Kanath replied. She had raised an eyebrow in surprise. “Maeve of Mordyna, then,” she commented. “Her love potion is one of the most powerful ever brewed. They say she made it out of desperation, determined not to live her life in misery when she realized what manner of man she had married. Even she was not powerful enough to change his nature, but he has not raised his hand to her in anger since she slipped him this brew in place of his evening’s wine some twenty years ago.” “How do you know this?” Rhicer asked, surprised at the details the young woman knew. “We have been at war with Mordyna for longer than that. Surely you have had no commerce with her.” “War is the purview of uncouth men,” the witch informed them with a regal air that would have set queens to shame. “Those of us who follow the old ways have better things to do with our time than meddle in such affairs. This will not be an easy spell to break. When did you drink it?” “Five days ago,” Kanath replied. Mistress Rodard frowned. “Five days, you say. I will do my best for you, but this may well be beyond my power. My mother, perhaps, would have had more luck, had she still lived, or if you had come to me right away, but Maeve’s elixir
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna grows more potent over time. The longer you wait, the harder it is to break the spell.” “We came as quickly as we could,” Rhicer insisted, his mind already calculating what to do if the antidote failed. “And I will give you what I can. You will take it and it will work or it will not. ’Tis the best I can do for you.” They had waited in nervous silence while she brewed the antidote, not looking at each other as they tried not to think about what would happen if the wise woman’s potion did not work. Though Rhicer would never have admitted it, he dreaded success almost as much as he did failure. The sound of applause drew Rhicer’s thoughts back to the present, to the smiling faces of his lord and new lady as they accepted the congratulations of the court on their wedding. He thought wistfully of his youthful dreams of sharing such a moment with Eldvese, but those thoughts had lost the power to hurt him over the past two weeks. He thought of her more often than before, but the memories had lost their potency. His heart was completely under Kanath’s sway now, a fact he had given up trying to deny to himself even though he was no closer to finding a solution that would allow him to give free rein to those emotions. Instinctively, his eyes sought his lieutenant. He did not allow himself to think of Kanath as his love except in the privacy of his chambers in the dead of the night, for fear that he would say or do something that would give him away. For once, Kanath was not looking back at him, focusing instead on the royal couple. Rhicer knew he should be watching them as well, but he could not tear his gaze away. He so rarely saw the other man in anything except the leather jerkin and breeches he wore on patrol. To see him now in his wedding finery… his eyes closed as he struggled against the 25
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna upwelling of desire. Battle gear was for protection, not to show off the figure of a man. The burgundy velvet tunic and tight breeches, on the other hand, had that exact purpose, and they drew Rhicer’s eyes like a magnet to Kanath’s broad shoulders, narrow waist, and long, long legs. An image of those legs wrapping around his hips flashed into Rhicer’s mind. With a muffled groan, he pushed the thoughts away. Across the room, Kanath knew the exact moment Rhicer looked his way. His sensitivity to that powerful gaze had grown over the past two weeks, until he could feel Rhicer’s eyes as if they were a caress. The witch had been kind, but her potion had been no match for the one that already bound them. He could feel the two spells warring within him and had known the moment Mistress Rodard’s elixir failed. His face had fallen, yet his heart had leapt in his chest, a conundrum that continued to haunt him. His mind told him that this could not be, but his heart insisted that it had to be. The trip back to court had been, if anything, more fraught than the trip north. As they traveled to see the wise woman, Kanath had held tight to the thought that the spell would be broken as a way to keep his desires in check. It had not stopped him from dreaming, but it had stopped him from acting on those dreams. Having that hope taken away, the reasons for denying himself had grown progressively more difficult to remember. He would lie awake at night, listening to Rhicer shift on the bedroll next to his, soft sounds escaping him as he dreamt. Kanath did not need to ask what Rhicer thought of as he slept. The moans and sighs spoke volumes of the passion his captain experienced in his dreams. Kanath’s only question, though unspoken, was who evoked those sighs. He jealously hoped it was him, even though he knew they could not act on their feelings. His
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna conscious mind continued to utter those protests, flinging up every nightmare image of men being castrated to stop their unnatural impulses, but when he finally escaped into dreams, the nightmares did not follow. Only tenderness colored his dreams, and love, as Rhicer turned every bit of his reputed skill on the younger man, wringing climax after climax from his willing flesh. Those three nights had been hard enough, but at least Rhicer had been close by. In the week since they returned to court, he had only seen the other man from a distance, and even then, only fleetingly. He would have feared Rhicer was avoiding him, except that preparations for the wedding and subsequent coronation had kept him so busy that Rhicer probably thought Kanath was the one avoiding his captain. The separation had done nothing to ease the dreams, though. They still assailed him every night, so vivid that he awoke gasping Rhicer’s name, his own seed wet on his belly. He found the entire situation more than a little embarrassing, but at least he had the privacy of his own chambers to hide his situation. He could only imagine how mortified he would have been if that had happened while they were still traveling. Even as he thought that, he wondered if Rhicer would have taken that as an invitation, if he would be sharing his passion with the older man now instead of spending himself alone in his sleep had he but let Rhicer see the depths to which the elixir had affected him. He crushed those rebellious thoughts mercilessly, driving them back into his subconscious, reminding himself that it was the potion making him feel this way, not his own true heart. Those words were easy to say, but with each passing day, he found them more and more difficult to believe. How could he when the smallest glimpse of the older man made his heart race, when the barest hint of acknowledgment fired
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna his loins? And when Rhicer looked at him the way he was doing now, eyes raking over him, studying him intently, Kanath’s knees weakened and his body throbbed with aching need. Only his iron will kept him from crossing the room and begging Rhicer to take him, to ease this terrible passion. He suspected Rhicer was just as on edge as he was, that his captain would not deny him if he asked, yet he kept his distance, and that gave Kanath the strength to do the same. He had never wanted to disappoint his captain, even when they had only been comrades-in-arms. The thought of disappointing his love was anathema to him. The movement of the court startled him from his thoughts, and he followed the others from the chapel into the hall where the celebratory feast was laid out. Usually, the prince preferred informality, the various members of court mingling freely, and that would hold true again after dinner, but for the feast tonight, they would sit according to rank. That meant he and Rhicer would have to sit side by side, their shared command of their patrol determining their seats. He said a silent prayer for fortitude, not wanting to embarrass Rhicer or put them in a dangerous position through some indiscretion. He approached the head table, making his bow to his new lady. To his surprise, she gestured him forward. “My lady?” he asked hesitantly, stepping up to the table deferentially. “You helped lead one of the patrols that escorted me to my new home,” Nische observed. “Take this rosebud as a sign of my appreciation.” Kanath took the flower she removed from her bridal bouquet in numb fingers. If it had been any other flower, he could have accepted it with aplomb, but holding the same 28
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna flower that had been on the potion bottle left him unsettled again. He murmured his thanks for the honor and stepped away, moving toward his seat with thoughts and emotions roiling. Could she know? Had she guessed that he and Rhicer had consumed her mother’s potion? Was she about to reveal their situation to the court? Before real panic could set in, he passed Tinrelm and Melot, Prince Emyl’s nephew, who had led the other patrol. Both of them already held roses identical to the one in his hand. Breathing a sigh of relief, Kanath took his seat, schooling his face to a simple welcoming smile as Rhicer joined him, also bearing a rose from Nische’s bouquet. He set his rose between their plates and scooted over on the bench to make room for Rhicer next to him. Rhicer slid into his seat next to Kanath, setting his rose next to Kanath’s on the table. He turned to smile at his lieutenant when movement on Kanath’s other side pushed the young man closer to him, their legs brushing under the table. He managed to stifle the groan that wanted to tear from his throat, but he could not stop the shiver that went through him at the first contact between their bodies in more than a week. He almost shifted away, but then he realized this would possibly be the only chance he would ever have to be this near to Kanath. As much as he knew it was a bad idea, this one night could well be all he would ever have with his lover. Could it really hurt to bask in this momentary closeness, this one indulgence in a lifetime of denial? Surely not. As soon as everyone was seated, the servants brought out the platters of food, setting one in front of each group of four people. Rhicer leaned forward, his shoulder brushing Kanath’s arm as he reached for the dish. The electrifying contact nearly made him drop the spoon in his hand. The 29
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna slight gasp he heard from his friend did not help his composure any. He took a deep breath, settling his singing nerves before serving Kanath and himself. Only after he had regained his seat did he realize the gesture was one usually shared between couples. No one seemed to look at them askance, though, so he shrugged and let it go, picking up his knife and beginning to eat. Next to him, Kanath trembled with suppressed desire. He wanted to look at Rhicer, to see if the other man was as affected by their closeness as he was, but he dared not turn his head, for fear the naked longing in his heart would be visible on his face for all to see. He forced himself to focus on his trencher, to lift the food to his mouth as if Rhicer serving him was an everyday occasion, as if he did not wish the rest of the court would disappear so he could give free rein to the lust that was riding him hard. He squirmed, trying to find a more comfortable position for his aching cock, the movement bumping his hip against Rhicer’s, only compounding the problem. “Sit still,” Rhicer muttered, the friction of Kanath’s body against his straining his control. Kanath shot his friend a disbelieving look. Before he could consider the wisdom of his actions, he dropped his hand beneath the table, grabbing Rhicer’s hand where it rested on his thigh and bringing it to the stiff shaft that was currently tormenting him. He hissed at the contact, not having thought that far ahead. “I can’t,” he ground out. Rhicer jerked his hand back as if burned, but instead of the horror he expected to feel, that he told himself he should feel having had his hand on another man’s cock, he was overcome by the rightness of it, the perfect way it curved into his palm, even confined within Kanath’s breeches. That did
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna not solve their current dilemma, though. Thinking quickly, he bumped a flagon of ale, allowing them both to jump up to avoid getting the dark liquid on their finery. “Go,” he whispered to Kanath under the cries of dismay and confusion. Kanath slipped away, stepping outside the overheated hall into the cool night air. He leaned on the wall surrounding the upper landing, hoping the separation from Rhicer would cool his ardor. The quiet, though, had the opposite effect, giving him the privacy to linger on the sensations evoked by Rhicer’s hand. He could not have said what possessed him to do such a foolish thing, but he could not regret it. That simple touch would fuel his fantasies, waking and sleeping, for months, along with the memories of Rhicer’s lips on his neck and the moans that escaped his friend’s lips when he dreamed. Resigning himself to suffering through the rest of the feast lust unquenched, he adjusted himself as best he could in his breeches, the touch of his hand enough to have him hissing again, his body arching into the touch. He considered giving himself relief, but he dared not be gone that long. Already, his absence would surely have been noticed. Even more than that, as much as it still bothered him to admit it, his own hand was not the touch he craved. ’Twas Rhicer’s hand he needed. With a groan, he lowered his head to the cold stones. What had possessed him? He could not do this anymore. After only two weeks, he was ready to break, ready to beg Rhicer for a moment of his time, for the simplest of touches. And when he could not do that, what had he done? Practically forced his best friend into molesting him! Something had to give, but he had no idea what. He remained outside for as long as he could justify, finally stepping back inside the hall, brushing at his tunic 31
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna with a scowl on his face to lend credence to the illusion that he had been splattered by the ale. His erection had not subsided at all, but at least his long tunic would hide the evidence from everyone. Everyone except Rhicer, that was. Rhicer would surely take one look at him and know he still ached with unfulfilled desire. To his relief and disappointment both, the meal had almost finished, many of the guests now milling around the room. Kanath returned to his seat to eat, for he was indeed hungry, but Rhicer had risen from his place, leaving Kanath plenty of space at the table. He had been so busy worrying about the close quarters at the feast that he had not considered what would happen after. Any celebration, but especially a wedding, was an excuse for socializing, and for the unattached ladies, and even for some who were attached, it was an opportunity to cast their lures among the men. To his dismay, the women swarmed around Rhicer like flies to honey. Or buzzards to fresh meat, he thought uncharitably. His hands curled into fists as he watched them flirt with the older soldier, their hands petting him subtly as they tried to catch his attention. Feeling suddenly nauseated, he pushed away from the table and barged into the crowd with every intention of driving them away from his lover. That thought drew him up short. Damn it! He simply could not make a spectacle out of them that way, especially when he had no idea if Rhicer wanted to be rescued. The man was giving every indication of enjoying the fawning attention. Scowling, Kanath decided that what was good for the, well, the gander was good for the gander. Taking a deep breath, he plastered his best smile on his face and set about gathering his own throng of admiring ladies.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Despite the façade he presented to the court, Rhicer was painfully aware of Kanath’s absence and his return to the hall. The distraction he had engineered had served its purpose for a few minutes, but as soon as the mess was sorted and he resumed his seat, his eyes had landed on the two rosebuds Nische had bestowed on them. In the chaos that had followed his spilling the ale, they had been shoved together so their leaves now brushed. The sight had brought back thoughts of another touch, of Kanath’s hand on his, and his hand on Kanath’s cock. He had finished eating quickly, knowing if he was still seated when Kanath returned, he would do something rash, something they would certainly both regret. Taking refuge in long-familiar behavior, he had risen from his seat as soon as he politely could, gathering around him a circle of fawning ladies, sure to distract his attention from his absent lieutenant. It had not worked, though. Their calculated caresses had the opposite of their intended effect, leaving Rhicer cold. He supposed that was better than being so heated from Kanath’s presence that he could not trust his own judgment. Then Kanath had stepped back into the hall and all thoughts of control disappeared. He had to fight not to turn his head, not to rake the other man with his gaze to ascertain his state of mind. Had he used the time outside to relieve the passion that had clearly been riding him? The mental image of Kanath with his hand on his cock, stroking himself to completion, sent lust surging back through Rhicer’s body. Even in his mind, he wanted to push Kanath’s hand away and replace it with his own. Forcibly turning his back on temptation, he smiled down at one of the ladies whom he had often favored with his attention in the past. Mistress Rynyl had used her status as a widow of the war to move among the court with impunity,
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna seducing as she saw fit. Her marriage had not been a happy one, so she was not looking to snare another husband, simply to enjoy the occasional liaison to sate her passions until the next time. They had made no promises, and would make none, but she was convenient and could be relied on to provide him with release when he needed it as well. Blacha recognized the look on Rhicer’s face. She had seen it often enough in the privacy of her chambers or his, as he tended to her pleasure or she to his. Smiling coquettishly, she slid her hand up his arm. “Dance with me?” she purred. “Gladly,” Rhicer replied with what he hoped passed for interest. It was hard, though, to focus on her when his senses were screaming at him to drive the harpies away from Kanath, to keep them from touching his lover. Kanath, though, did not seem at all bothered by their attention. Fine, Rhicer thought. If that’s the way you want things to be…. He drew Mistress Rynyl into his arms, holding her close enough that her breasts brushed his chest as the dancing began. He could hear her surprised gasp—they were not usually quite so forward in public—but the sound did nothing for him this time. It was Kanath’s gasps he wanted to hear, Kanath’s passion he wanted to inspire. Kanath glared daggers across the room at the trollop in Rhicer’s arms. Never mind that he liked Blacha, that he had spent hours in pleasant conversation with her. All he knew now was that she was where Kanath wanted to be, where he belonged—in Rhicer’s arms. Determined not to let his jealousy show, he turned away and sought out the first woman he could find. Mistress Lorod was not the companion he would have chosen had he been thinking rationally, but his only thought now was to evoke in Rhicer the same unreasoning jealousy that seeing Blacha in Rhicer’s arms 34
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna had evoked in him. He pulled the skinny girl into his arms, guiding her roughly through the dance, uncaring that his grip was too tight. The forms of the dance brought the two men close, then sent them spinning apart again. They paid minimal attention to their partners, all their awareness focused on each other. Rhicer grimaced when he saw Kanath’s dancing partner, the knowledge that his lover had chosen Hinia salt in his wounds. He knew Kanath’s opinion of the insufferably vain chit, knew Kanath would never have chosen to dance with her normally, which meant that the young man was deliberately teasing him, dancing purely to provoke Rhicer. Face hardening, he turned away, unwilling to watch her hands on his Kanath. Anger grew within him at the unfairness of the situation, at the strictures of society that let that little slut put her hands all over Kanath with impunity while he, who loved Kanath beyond reason, was condemned to watch in ever-mounting frustration. A pained gasp from Blacha drew his attention. “My apologies, Mistress,” he said softly. “I am not fit company tonight.” “Perhaps a glass of wine would lift your spirits,” she suggested cajolingly. “Or would you rather slip away somewhere private? I am sure I could improve your mood.” Rhicer frowned. Always before, she would have been right. Her clever hands and cleverer mouth would have had him climaxing in a matter of minutes, and she would have done it willingly, knowing that he would return the favor tenfold when they had more time. Now, though, it was harder hands he craved, not her delicate fingers. “Not tonight,” he murmured. “We cannot leave until our lord and lady have retired. You know that.”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Blacha’s lips curled in frustration as she listened to the feeble excuse. “That did not stop your lieutenant from sneaking out during the feast,” she pointed out cattily. “That was different!” Rhicer protested. “I spilled ale all over him. He simply went to clean up his tunic. And he went out and returned alone.” And he better not have met anyone while outside, Rhicer’s jealous mind growled. “What you are suggesting would be the height of folly, tonight of all nights.” Blacha thought her sometimes-lover was showing far too much attention to the sensibilities of a foreign upstart, but she said nothing. She knew Rhicer well enough to know that when he got in one of his moods, he would not be swayed. “Then I will take my leave,” she declared with a peremptory curtsy. Before he could react, before he could look for Kanath, a heavy hand clapped him on the shoulder. “What did you do to set the lass off this time?” Rynes’ deep voice asked teasingly. Rhicer breathed a sigh of relief. Finally, distracting company that would demand nothing more of him than he was willing to give! “She wanted to slip away into a dark hallway or empty room,” Rhicer explained easily. “I didn’t think tonight was the time for such indiscretions.” “We’re at a wedding feast, Rhicer! How could it not be the right time?” Rynes demanded incredulously. “We’re at the wedding feast of our lord and a Mordyn princess,” Rhicer elucidated. “I wouldn’t want to be the one to cause insult. When they have left, then I can slip away.” Thinking it safe to stand with Rhicer as long as Rynes was there as well, Kanath joined the other two men just in
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna time to hear Rhicer’s last words. Anger and jealousy, calmed somewhat by seeing Mistress Rynyl leave, sprang to life again. Did he mean so little to Rhicer that his captain was planning an assignation under his very nose? Turning on his heel, he stalked away, grabbing a flagon of ale from the table and downing it in one gulp. “What’s bothering the pup tonight?” Rynes inquired, catching the anger on Kanath’s face and seeing his reaction, but unaware of the cause. For the first time in his life, Rhicer lied to Rynes. “I have no idea.” He did know, though, as clearly as if he could see into Kanath’s head. He chafed at the restrictions that kept him from pulling the other man into an embrace, from shaking him for being so silly as to imagine Rhicer could prefer any woman’s company to his. “Well, keep an eye on him,” Rynes advised. “If he gets drunk and stupid, he’s far more likely to cause insult than you would have slipping away discreetly.” Rhicer sighed. Rynes had just given him reason to do what he had wanted to all evening—hover at Kanath’s side— and yet he knew that doing so would only exacerbate the situation. Their proximity would send the lust neither of them could seem to contain spinning back out of control again, and one of two things would certainly happen. They would either end up making a scene because they were arguing or they would make a scene because they would no longer be able to keep their hands to themselves. Neither option seemed like a good idea to Rhicer, but he was the cause of Kanath’s budding drunken rampage, and he could not simply wash his hands of the situation.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Fortunately, the prince chose that moment to call for the court’s attention, thanking them for their well-wishes. Extending his hand to his lady, they excused themselves amid applause and catcalls, leaving the court to continue its celebration without them. The ladies of the court excused themselves quickly as well, leaving the soldiers and those few women whose only interest was finding a bed partner for the night. Using the general chaos as an excuse to seek out Kanath, Rhicer discovered that his quarry was more adept than he expected, staying one step ahead of him while still drinking steadily. Growing frustrated, Rhicer abandoned the chase, trying to formulate another plan. If Kanath would not consent to be caught, perhaps he could be enticed into doing the capturing. Following one of the women out of the hall, he waited in the shadows of the darkened corridor to see if Kanath would take his bait. Inside, Kanath’s anger finally slipped the weakened leash of his control when he saw Rhicer accept one of the trollop’s invitations and follow her out the door. Throwing the flagon in his hand to the floor, he stormed after his lover, determined to set the other man straight. Rhicer was his and no light-skirted whore was going to steal him away. He had taken no more than two steps down the shadowy passage when hard hands closed over his shoulders. “What the hell is wrong with you?” Rhicer’s voice demanded in his ear. Kanath sagged against Rhicer in relief, his back pressing down the long length of the captain’s body. So pleased was he not to find the other man with some woman that he did not even react to the sensation of his fellow soldier’s erection prodding his backside vigorously. Then the angry words
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna penetrated the fog of alcohol and lust. “Me?” he hissed, turning to face Rhicer. “What about you, strutting around the room, letting Blacha rub up against you like a cat in heat?” “I didn’t—” Rhicer began, but the rest of his words never came. Kanath’s lips silenced them, pressing hard against Rhicer’s in a sloppy, drunken kiss. Shocked, he stood there and let it happen. Kanath drew back in panic. Earlier, he had berated himself for his actions at the feast, but this was much worse, much more personally intimate. He took one step back, then another, intending to turn and flee. He never got the chance. Shock wearing off, Rhicer felt Kanath withdraw. “Hell, no,” he muttered, grabbing the younger man’s shoulders and spinning him around, slamming him hard against the wall. “You don’t get to kiss me and run.” Before Kanath could reply to that, Rhicer’s mouth settled over his, lips moving hungrily, urgently. Kanath gasped beneath the onslaught, lips parting on the sudden inhalation. Rhicer took advantage immediately, tongue surging inside to taste and plunder and claim. Kanath arched forward, head tipping back as he stopped fighting against the love and lust that had assailed him all evening. He could taste the ale from dinner on Rhicer’s lips still, and another, deeper flavor that was Rhicer’s own. Sucking eagerly on the invading muscle, he memorized the taste, afraid he might never have another chance. Eventually, the need to breathe forced Rhicer to lift his head. As he stood there, body throbbing with unquenched desire, the reality of what they were doing—and where they were doing it—hit him hard. He took a hesitant step back, intending to ask Kanath to come to his chambers with him. 39
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Before he could speak, though, his lover ran like a frightened doe. Panting still, Rhicer let him go. Horny as hell and halfdrunk was not the way to have the conversation they clearly needed to have. With a muffled groan, he resigned himself to another night alone.
LYING alone in his cold bed, Rhicer mulled over the evening
and all that had transpired. He had hoped that the distance between him and Kanath over the past week would allow their emotions to settle. Clearly, that had not worked. As soon as they had come together again, the passion had exploded between them, stronger than ever, pushing them both to behave far more rashly than usual. Even at his most desperate or daring, he had never kissed a woman the way he had Kanath tonight, in a corridor, where anyone could stumble across them. He had always at least had the presence of mind to pull a prospective lover into an empty room. Yet he had not hesitated to pin Kanath against the wall and ravish his mouth. Kissing Kanath bore no resemblance to kissing any woman, though. No woman had ever responded so aggressively to his kiss, had ever fought him for control the way Kanath had done. His cock sprang to life instantly at the thought of the way his lieutenant’s hard body had pushed against his. Sliding his hand beneath the covers, he stroked firmly, twisting his wrist to apply just the degree of friction he enjoyed best. His mind raced at the feeling of his own hard flesh, remembering the fleeting sensation of Kanath’s cock in his hand. Still stroking lightly, he struggled to work
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna his mind around this new reality, where he could yearn to feel another man’s erection in his fist, another man’s hand around his shaft. Somewhat to his surprise, his cock did not wilt at the thought. Pensively, he considered the mechanics of making love to a man. As wrong as he had always believed that to be, he had heard whispered tales of barbarian warriors who practiced such acts openly, forming bonds that lasted as long as any marriage. Such tales had always been greeted with scorn and derision, and Rhicer had been as apt to discount them as anyone else, but now he wondered. With a woman, it was obvious, but how could that work with a man? His hand stroked again as he pondered the possibilities. Certainly, they could caress each other as he was touching himself now. A moan escaped his lips as he imagined Kanath’s hand on his cock, stroking him slowly at first, and then with increasing speed and strength. His hand would be callused from sword fighting, much the way Rhicer’s own hand was, instead of soft and smooth like a woman’s. They could take each other in their mouths as some of the women had done to him. It was a form of lovemaking he had always enjoyed, the sweet taste of a woman’s warm folds, her heady scent enticing him to take his time and savor. Would Kanath taste as sweet? His fingers tightened on his cock as he imagined Kanath’s lips stretching around his girth. That part was easy to imagine, but he would not ask his lover to do something he himself was not willing to do in return. Curious, he caught a drop of welling fluid from the tip of his erection and lifted it to his mouth, sucking on his thumb to catch the flavor. It was different from a woman’s
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna juices, but not repellant. He caught another drop and tasted again. Perhaps it would not be so terrible a thing to try. The thought of sharing such intimacies with Kanath had him throbbing, aching for a hand other than his own, for lips to kiss, a body to explore and devour. Images of the two of them entwined on his bed overwhelmed him, catapulting him into his release. Panting, he lay back and tried to relax. Maybe it would not be so awful to make love with a man instead of a woman. He would miss sinking into a woman’s moist, hot depths, though, miss feeling her muscles squeezing his cock, welcoming him in, meeting him thrust for thrust. Horrified whispers returned to his memory, tales of men captured in battle forced to whore like women for barbarian tribes. He shuddered at the thought, his body immediately clenching against such an invasion. Surely he could not… and if he could not, he would not ask it of Kanath. Wiping his stomach clean, he turned on his side and sought refuge in dreams. His final thoughts followed him into reverie, however, haunting him as he tossed and turned. He moaned in his sleep as he felt Kanath beneath him, looking up at him with trusting, lustful eyes as he thrust repeatedly into his lover’s hot depths, muscles clenching tighter than any woman’s ever had, squeezing him, milking every drop of fluid from his spasming cock as he came and came and came. Cool sticky sheets woke him to the reality of yet another dream-induced climax. Sitting up, breath still fast, pulse pounding, he let the images of his dream filter into his conscious mind. Despite his instinctive revulsion, his subconscious clearly wanted more with Kanath than frottage and fellatio. He shuddered again, the teachings of a lifetime
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna warring with the images from his dream. He had never questioned those teachings, perfectly content to take his pleasure with women, but his situation had changed now, and that meant exploring a new reality. The same practicality that had made him a force to be reckoned with on the battlefield came to the fore now, as he considered how he and Kanath might undertake a relationship. Whatever they decided, it would have to be clandestine. That much was a given. The question was what any such relationship might look like. He had rejected certain options out of longingrained habit, but his dreams suggested his heart was not as willing to set them aside as his mind. And if that was the case, then he needed to know if it was possible or just the half-formed fantasies of a lust-crazed mind. Reaching between his legs, he probed at the little hole, finally managing to force the tip of one finger inside, flinching as he did. This was not as easy as it seemed. With a woman, his fingers had always slid inside easily, her natural fluids easing the way. His own entrance was bone dry. His body was obviously not made to accommodate another man’s cock! Determined to see if this was even possible, not to mention pleasurable enough to propose to Kanath, Rhicer glanced around the room, searching for something he could use to imitate a woman’s inherent lubrication. His eyes settled on the flaxseed oil he used to dampen his whetstone. It kept the stone from damaging his blades. It ought to ease this process as well. He set the small container on the bed next to him, dipping his finger in the viscous fluid, and tried again. The oil helped, but it was still an odd feeling. His body kept trying to expel the invader, clenching tightly around his digit. He could only imagine how that would feel around his cock, but if he could barely accept the tip of one finger comfortably, how was he supposed to consider pushing his erection into such a tight space? 43
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna After a few moments, he realized the pain had passed somewhat and, while he still felt oddly full, it no longer hurt. He pushed his finger in a little farther, stroking the walls of the passage the way he would a woman’s sheath. At first, he felt nothing special, but then the tip of his finger brushed a little bump and sparks danced before his eyes. Gasping, he tried again, with the same results. He had found the pleasure to be had. Now the only question that remained was one of size. He had felt Kanath’s cock and it was of much greater girth than his own index finger. Withdrawing his finger, he looked down at his hand appraisingly, bunching his fingers together, trying to approximate the girth he had held in his hand so briefly at dinner that night. Taking a deep breath, trying to relax, he dipped three fingers in the oil and returned his hand to its explorations. Pushing hard against his entrance, he worked a second finger back in next to the first. It hurt, but then, one finger had hurt at first too. Reminding himself that there was pleasure to be found in this exercise, he tried to relax as he searched for the little bump again. Finding it, he worked it repeatedly until his muscles eased around the invasion. Taking another deep breath and trying not to tense, he pulled back and added a third finger, panting through the initial stretch. Eventually, though, his muscles relaxed and accommodated the digits inside him. Dropping his other hand to his resurgent erection, he stroked his shaft in time with the internal stimulation of his fingers. In a surprisingly short amount of time, given he had climaxed twice already that night, he found himself teetering on the edge of release again. Eyes closing, he let his imagination change the scene to fit his desires, so that Kanath’s hand now surrounded his aching erection, Kanath’s fingers—nay, Kanath’s cock—now stroked his
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna insides. As soon as the image formed, his self-control deserted him and he collapsed onto the bed, Kanath’s name on his lips. Sleep took him immediately, and if he dreamed again, he did not remember it in the morning.
LONG before the sun rose, Kanath abandoned his bed and sought the comfort of the mews. Taen, his pride and joy, opened one eye sleepily before shutting it again, but she consented to his gentle stroking despite the early hour.
The mews and caring for Taen had provided Kanath a retreat, a place for quiet contemplation, for almost as long as he could remember. The prince had seen the boy hanging around the wooden structure even before he could talk, watching the birds, listening and absorbing what the falconers had to teach. He had encouraged his interest, promising that if he learned well and showed himself serious enough, he would see to it that Kanath received a bird of his own when he was old enough. Taen had been a present from his sovereign on his tenth birthday. He retreated there now to struggle again with the events of the previous night’s feast. The potion was clearly more potent than he had previously thought, given the way he had acted during the meal and after. The whole situation frightened him. There. He had said it. His mother always told him admitting to a fear was the most important step in
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna overcoming it. Somehow, Kanath did not find that thought terribly reassuring at the moment. It had been one thing when he was out of control, but Rhicer had still managed to retain his command of the situation, providing Kanath with a means of escape for a few minutes during the feast. As the night wore on, though, his captain—his lover—had steadily lost control as well. In the crisp light of the dawning day, he could admit to the jealousy he had felt, admit to trying to spark an answering emotion inside Rhicer. He had obviously succeeded, far beyond his wildest expectations if Rhicer’s kiss was anything to go by. He trembled, leaning weakly against Taen’s stand, as he remembered what it had felt like to be caught between the hard stone and Rhicer’s harder body, his lips captured, claimed, his mouth possessed. No woman had ever dared kiss him the way Rhicer had, with all the anger and jealousy and lust that had colored their exchange. No woman had ever commanded his surrender the way Rhicer had. He had ached to surrender, ached to beg… for another kiss, a caress, anything to soothe the roaring emotions in his chest. By the ancient gods and goddesses, he had wanted it! And that thought had been enough to send him fleeing into the night. Despite the needs roused by the potion, he was not a passive man, not one to surrender or to beg. He had not reached his position as the youngest leader of his liege’s patrols by letting someone else take charge. He acted first and asked permission later, taking control of situations and exploiting them to meet his own ends. To find himself now wanting to be taken, to be controlled, angered him as much as it scared him. As much as it aroused him. Here, in his refuge, with no one to see but Taen, he could admit that he had returned to his chamber last night and 46
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna brought himself off to thoughts of Rhicer kissing him, claiming him, loving him, but the images, other than the kiss, had been formless, sensation rather than sight. The feast had proven to him the folly of denying what he felt. Regardless of how it had started, he considered Rhicer his now. The only question was whether he could stake that claim and still retain any sense of himself. He wanted Rhicer, desperately, but if having him meant giving up his own identity, it would be better if he simply left now. The prince would surely recommend him to one of the other lords, would surely help him establish himself elsewhere. “I thought I might find you here.” Kanath spun, the sudden movement startling Taen. Reflexively, he stroked her feathers, calming her, but the familiar easy motion did nothing to calm his own racing heart. “Rhicer,” he acknowledged. “You’ve always come here to think,” Rhicer observed softly. Not sure what to say, Kanath settled for saying nothing. Rhicer was right, of course, but he did not need Kanath to tell him that. Instead, he resumed his gentle preening of Taen’s feathers. “Will you walk with me?” Rhicer asked diffidently. “We need to talk, and I imagine it would be easier if we don’t have to worry about anyone overhearing us.” Kanath nodded nervously. He almost held his wrist out to Taen, just to have something to do with his hands, but he stopped himself. This was Rhicer, his captain and friend. His lover, his traitorous thoughts added. Scolding himself for such thoughts, he stroked Taen’s wings one final time. “Lead the way.” 47
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Rhicer headed into the forest, taking a little-used path away from the keep. He had found the path, and the ruins it led to, soon after his arrival at court. He had gone there seeking solitude, a place to mourn Eldvese’s death. More than once, sitting among the old, mossy stones, he had considered taking his own life and joining her, but something had always stayed his hand: a sense of duty, a refusal to take the easy way out, a hope for a better future despite the darkness of his path. As far as he knew, no one else ever went there. It would provide them the privacy to speak honestly without imposing the intimacy of one bedchamber or the other. After his dreams the night before, Rhicer was not entirely sure he trusted himself around Kanath and a bed. Certainly not until he had his lover’s permission. “What is this place?” Kanath asked as they reached the ruins. Forgetting for a moment the tangle they had landed in, he walked the edge of the clearing with wide eyes, fingers touching the old stones as if they could come alive and reveal all their secrets. One wall still stood, along with the hint of several arches that would have formed the roof when the building was intact. The stones had been pale when they were first quarried, but rain and wind and time had weathered them to a dull brown, highlighted with dark green moss and pale yellowy-white lichen. His toe prodded the carpet of fallen leaves, tracing the line of the foundation across the forest floor. At what would have been the far corner of the building, had it still been standing, he stopped cold. A tangle of branches lay across the ground, covered in rosebuds despite the lack of support for the climbing tendrils. “What it was originally, I can only venture to guess,” Rhicer replied as he watched Kanath explore. “Now, though,
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna it is my hiding place. I come here when I need an escape from court.” He managed to smother the gasp that wanted to slip free when he saw the rose bush Kanath had found, but he could not stop the leap of his heart. Roses had haunted them since this misadventure began, on the potion that linked them, at the feast the night before, a gift from their lady, and now here, on brambles he had seen for years, but never in bloom. It seemed the flower was entwined with their lives as the individual branches of the bush were. Rhicer had gone back after their heated kiss and Kanath’s flight, to retrieve the two roses Nische had bestowed on them last night, not wanting someone to find them and tell their lady how careless they were with her gift. Over the course of the evening, their leaves had become so entangled that he had been unable to separate them. “I thought it was a weed,” he murmured, reaching down to touch one of the nascent flowers. He told himself he was imagining it, but it seemed the bloom swelled beneath his touch, one step closer to flowering in its full glory. Clearing his throat, Kanath turned his back on the rosebush, facing Rhicer across the clearing. “You said you wanted to talk.” “We have to stop pretending nothing has changed,” Rhicer said softly, not approaching Kanath yet. The younger man had the look of a frightened deer, and Rhicer did not want to give him any reason to run. “We do?” Kanath asked. “Look how well it worked last night,” Rhicer pointed out. “I could barely stand to watch you dancing with anyone else.”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “You could have fooled me,” Kanath retorted. “The way you were dancing with Mistress Rynyl certainly didn’t give me that impression.” “Then you weren’t paying enough attention,” Rhicer replied with a rueful chuckle. “Even Rynes realized something was wrong with both of us. He just couldn’t figure out what.” “You didn’t tell him, did you?” Kanath exclaimed in a panicked voice. No one could know! They would be cast out or worse! “Of course not,” Rhicer assured him soothingly, taking a step forward before thinking the better of it and stopping again, “but if we don’t figure out a way to live with this, it won’t take long before other people start asking questions, and we can only plead ignorance or bad moods for so long. We have to figure out how to make this work between us.” “What do you mean?” Kanath asked warily. “I was jealous last night, watching you dance with Mistress Lorod. I didn’t want you touching anyone but me,” Rhicer began, sure that revealing his own feelings was the way to convince Kanath to admit his. “I handled it badly, I know that, but I didn’t expect it. I’ve had some time to think since then. We’ve been friends for ten years, Kanath. That’s a lot more than most marriages have when they start. Do you think we could find a way to deal with this together?” “Together?” Kanath repeated, not sure exactly what Rhicer meant. Too nervous now to stand still, he started to pace, his steps measuring the edge of the clearing. “Was it really so terrible to kiss me last night?”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna It had not been terrible at all, but a lifetime of conditioning made that hard to admit. He stopped pacing to look across the clearing at Rhicer only to find the object of his desires much closer than he realized. He froze, breath rasping in and out as memories assailed him, of Rhicer’s lips on his, Rhicer’s body pressing his to the wall. Taking Kanath’s stillness as a good sign, Rhicer took a step closer. They were not touching, but he could sense the shivers that went through the younger man. Hoping to encourage that, he added, his voice dropping to a husky whisper, “I went back to my chamber last night and thought of you. Do you know what I did, lying in my bed alone? I imagined you there with me, touching me the way I was touching myself.” “Rhicer, we can’t,” Kanath protested breathily, his entire body yearning for exactly what Rhicer was describing. “Why not?” Rhicer asked, closing the distance between them so that his breath tickled Kanath’s neck as he spoke. This was a side of Rhicer Kanath had never seen before. He knew Rhicer the warrior, Rhicer the friend, but he had never been privy to Rhicer the seducer. He was beginning to understand his captain’s popularity with the ladies. “I agree no one can know,” Rhicer continued, addressing what he was sure was Kanath’s primary concern, “but that doesn’t mean we can’t meet discreetly and see what could come of this.” “It’s the potion making you say this,” Kanath protested even as he leaned back into Rhicer’s warmth. The seductive images beckoned his mind and heart, urging him to give in. What harm could there be? They could be discreet. They had
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna both conducted affairs before, no hint of scandal touching their names or the names of their lovers. “The potion started this,” Rhicer agreed, for how could he deny it, “but I am choosing to continue it. I have imagined you in my arms every night since you woke up in them and I want to know that feeling again. I want to hear the cries I have only dreamed of. I want to feel the caresses I have only imagined. Can you truly tell me you do not feel the same?” As he spoke, he nuzzled gently at Kanath’s neck, a conscious imitation of the first caress he and his lover had shared in their sleep. “No,” Kanath replied, his head tilting to grant Rhicer better access, “but I don’t know what to do.” “You didn’t have any problem figuring out what to do last night,” Rhicer pointed out, nibbling lightly on his lover’s skin. “Kiss me. Start with that.” The invitation was more than Kanath could refuse. With a sharp breath, he turned in Rhicer’s arms and did as the older man had said, fitting their lips together with all the passion that had consumed him since their first kiss the night before. Unlike the quick fumble in the corridor, they had no fear of being found this time. They had already discussed and dismissed the reasons not to do this. All that remained was to explore the growing emotions between them, to learn finally how they fit together. Despite their eagerness and mutual desire, it was awkward at first, both of them used to taking control with their lovers. “Relax,” Rhicer murmured, pulling away enough to catch his breath. “This isn’t a competition you have to win.”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Kanath tensed, starting to pull away. “So I’m supposed to roll over and give in to you?” he snarled. The anger in Kanath’s words startled Rhicer until he caught the hint of fear beneath it. He shook his head, tightening his arms enough to stop his lover’s backward movement. “That isn’t what I meant. All I care about is your pleasure. I have always found my pleasure in seeing to my lover, but that doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate your attentions in return.” Leaning down, he nuzzled Kanath’s neck. “Does this feel good?” Kanath moaned softly. Rhicer lifted his head and looked down into Kanath’s eyes seriously. “If it were a woman nuzzling your neck that way, would it bother you?” “No,” Kanath had to reply. “And what would you do while she nuzzled at your neck that way?” Kanath flushed, but replied, “Probably fondle her breasts, maybe use one arm to pull her against me so she could feel how good she was making me feel.” Rhicer chuckled. “I don’t have breasts, but I certainly enjoyed the last time you caressed my chest. I’ve been dreaming about it since that night. So, can we try this again?” He started to lower his head, but Kanath caught his chin, lifting it so their eyes met again. “Do you mean that?” “Mean what?” Rhicer asked. “That I’ve dreamt of you? Yes. I mean it. That I want you to touch me? Yes. I mean it.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna That my cock is throbbing so hard I’m afraid of what will happen if you don’t touch me soon? Yes. I mean it.” Kanath’s eyes closed on the seductive words. “How am I supposed to resist you when you say things like that?” “You’re not,” Rhicer assured him, lowering his head and nuzzling at Kanath’s neck again, angling his upper body in clear invitation. A part of Kanath’s mind wondered traitorously if Rhicer had used that line on previous conquests, but he pushed the thought aside. Rhicer was there with him now. He had no claim on his lover’s past. And unless he started staking one, he would have no claim on his lover’s future. Mindful of Rhicer’s suggestion that he react to this lover as he had with previous lovers, he stroked his hand down the blond’s chest. It felt odd not to encounter the swell of breasts, but he did not let the oddity dissuade him. Thinking of what felt good to him, he flattened his hand and used the heel to massage at the heavy muscle of Rhicer’s chest. Rhicer inhaled sharply, his grip on Kanath’s hips tightening as his lover kneaded his flesh. Even through the fabric of his light tunic, the touch galvanized him, leaving him trembling and aching for more. He pulsed his hips against Kanath’s thigh, letting the other man feel his arousal. It was a gamble, but it was one he felt he had to take. The reality they were facing was of a love that involved two cocks, not just one. He had come to terms with that during the night. He needed to know Kanath could accept it, too, before he invested any more in this. Up until last night, everything that had passed between them had been forced on them or from them by the potion. This was different. He had consciously sought Kanath out that morning with the intention of determining if they could 54
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna make this work between them. His seduction of Kanath was as deliberate as any seduction he had ever carried out. More so, even, for this was the love he would bear for the rest of his life, whether Kanath accepted him or rejected him. For Rhicer, this was it. He was in love with his lieutenant, come what may. Kanath tensed again when he felt Rhicer’s erection pressing against his leg, but he stopped himself from pulling back. Despite the way the older man had cajoled him into this position, he knew Rhicer was not a woman. He still struggled with that fact, but he had to stop reacting like a scared child. Rhicer had not forced him to come here, had not forced him to accept a kiss or a caress or an intimate touch. Rhicer was not suddenly going to throw him down and force anything else on him either. His own niggling concerns about losing himself reared their heads again, but they were easier to address. He would simply have to take control of the situation. He knew how to make love to a woman, and while this would obviously be different—the cock pressed against his thigh reminded him constantly of that fact—what he already knew would surely hold him in good stead. So the next logical step was to peel away a few of the layers of clothes that separated them. That, at least, he knew he could handle. He had seen Rhicer shirtless countless times. Undoing the laces on Rhicer’s tunic was not at all like undoing the laces down the back of a woman’s dress, nor very much like loosening his own laces, but he managed to get them undone with a minimum of fuss, parting the cloth to reveal hair-dusted skin burnished gold by the sun. He should not have been surprised at the sudden desire to touch, to caress, to explore—the love potion had seen to that—but even so, the intensity of the emotion nearly
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna brought him to his knees. Rather than fight it, a ridiculous endeavor when Rhicer had more than given permission anyway, he replaced his hand as it had been before, palm covering one dusky nipple, pressing down firmly, repeatedly, actively trying now to build the passion between them. It still felt strange to have the rasp of hair against his skin, instead of smooth flesh, but it no longer repelled him the way it had the first time he felt it. Rhicer shrugged his tunic off his shoulders, letting it fall unheeded to the ground. Lifting his head, he focused on removing Kanath's tunic as well, wanting his hands on the smooth skin that had haunted his dreams. Two weeks ago, he would have professed to having no idea if Kanath was smooth or hirsute or somewhere in between, but the magic in the elixir had pulled up and clarified every memory he had of seeing his lover shirtless in the summer heat, tormenting him with images of sweat gleaming on olive skin. No longer. He could touch now, could indulge the desire that had teased him these past two weeks. He trailed a single fingertip around the dark circle the color of the fallen leaves, seeing it pucker beneath his petting, the center hardening to a tempting point. “Do you like that?” he queried, though he thought he knew the answer already. Kanath arched into the questing caress, a vague memory of wondering if Rhicer would touch him this way flitting across his thoughts. He had his answer now. “Yes,” he moaned. “Please… don’t stop.” “I won’t,” Rhicer promised, his finger circling again with firmer pressure this time. Kanath was so incredibly responsive simply from the gentle stimulation to his nipples. Rhicer could only wonder at how his lover would react to having his cock stroked.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna A part of him wanted to delay, to draw out these moments of discovery, but his own arousal was straining at his breeches, demanding attention, and he suspected the quickest way to ensure that would be to show Kanath how good it could feel. Trailing his knuckles gently down his lover’s torso, he brushed them across the bulge distending the younger man’s leggings. The compulsive jerk brought a smile to his lips even as his lust drove him to touch again, to explore fully. He reined in his desire, keeping it under iron control. He wanted Kanath desperately—his hands, his lips, his body— but rushing this could spook his lover, and that would make the next step that much harder to take later. Subduing his demons, he focused entirely on the warm body in his arms, determined to make this an experience his lover would want to repeat. Often. The fleeting touch of Rhicer’s hand on his swollen shaft caught Kanath off guard, but as soon as he felt it, he knew he wanted it again, preferably without the layer of cloth between them. Heedless of the dictates of propriety, he dropped his hands to his breeches, opening them and letting his aching erection spring free. Immediately, Rhicer’s hand closed around it, the sensations enough to have Kanath arching with pleasure. Fortunately, his lover’s arm went around his waist, supporting him, else he would surely have fallen to the ground. Kanath’s reaction was everything Rhicer could have hoped for and more, but it posed a problem he had not considered in suggesting this sylvan setting for their conversation. As long as they were talking, it was ideal, but now, wishing they could stretch out beside each other, he
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna was stymied. He did not even have his cloak, the day being far too warm to require it. Stopping long enough to return to the keep, particularly in the state they were in, was unthinkable, however, which meant he needed to find another solution. He glanced around the clearing again, assessing it rapidly. The moss that grew in the lee of the remaining wall would provide a soft seat, the wall some support for their backs. “Come sit with me,” Rhicer suggested, reaching for Kanath’s hand and leading his lover to his chosen spot. Kanath followed eagerly, settling onto the moss and reaching for Rhicer. One hand pulled his lover down for another hungry kiss while the other grabbed Rhicer's hand and returned it to his own aching cock. Rhicer answered the kiss with matching hunger, all thoughts of who controlled what burned away by the heat of their escalating passion. His hand took up a rhythm designed to arouse, his tongue matching it as it surged between Kanath's lips. He wanted his lover mindless with desire, moaning and writhing against him. Kanath leaned back against the wall, bracing himself to lift his hips into Rhicer's caress. More than once since drinking the potion, he had dreamed of Rhicer touching him this way, but he had never truly believed he would see those dreams realized. Until last night, he would have denied wanting to see those dreams realized, but now, in the shadowy glade, with no one to see or hear but his lover and the birds that flitted idly overhead, he gave voice to his hidden desires, his words tumbling out in an incoherent babble, testament to the power of Rhicer's caress. “Let go, my love,” Rhicer whispered, leaning close to Kanath's ear, his hand never slowing its deliberate strokes.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna He had imagined this moment, alone in his room, but he had underestimated the beauty of watching his lover move beneath his hand, arching up into his caress, seeking a release that only Rhicer could give him. Overwhelmed by the force of his emotions, he lowered his head to Kanath's shoulder, struggling for control. Kanath did not realize that, though, hands closing around Rhicer's skull, urging him lower. Immediately, Rhicer complied, his mouth sliding to the enticing disks he had teased earlier with his fingers. Closing his lips around one tight peak, he suckled firmly in time with the movement of his hand. The drag of the blond's mouth on his sensitive nipple sent Kanath over the edge, his cock twitching rapidly, coating Rhicer's hand and his own stomach in creamy fluid. His eyes rolled back in his head as he collapsed backward, letting the wall support him fully. His breaths continued in sharp little pants as the enormity of what had just happened washed over him. His climax, from little more than the touch of Rhicer's hand, had been as strong as any he had ever experienced. From Rhicer's hand. He was half-sitting, halflying on a bed of moss, his shirt and breeches undone, his sated cock still cradled by Rhicer's hand... Rhicer's hand. Every bit of a lifetime's worth of conditioning rebelled at the thought, protesting that this must be wrong, that somehow this could not have happened, but he could not deny the evidence before his eyes. Nor did he want to anymore. That thought surprised him, but denying his feelings had led to guilt, anger, jealousy, confusion. Now, though, he felt none of those things, only a bone-deep sense of well-being that far surpassed anything he had ever known with the women he had consorted with in the past. That realization drew his eyes up to meet his friend’s. A single glance 59
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna revealed the unassuaged passion that still rode the other man hard. Guilt swept over Kanath as he realized how incredibly selfish he had been. At first, he had been so concerned about keeping things equal, about giving as good as he got, but all those thoughts had fled when Rhicer touched his erection. He was not a selfish lover. He never had been, and he had no intention of starting now. As much as he had fought it, as uncomfortable as the idea continued to make him, Rhicer was his lover now, and it was time to come to terms with that. Pushing himself back up to sitting, he smiled lasciviously at Rhicer. “It seems you have a little problem there, lover,” he drawled, hand stretching out to cup the heavy bulge. “You don't have to—” Rhicer began, only to have his words cut off by a fierce kiss. “No, I don't have to,” Kanath agreed when they separated, “but I do want to. Let me give you back the pleasure you gave me.” It was an offer Rhicer could not refuse. He leaned back against the wall as Kanath shifted onto his knees, reversing their position of a few moments ago. Eyes wide with wonder, Kanath unlaced his lover's breeches, freeing the rampant erection within. Pushing aside his niggling doubts, he reminded himself that he knew exactly what to do with an aching cock because he dealt with his own on a regular basis. Tending to Rhicer's could not be so terribly different. Taking a deep breath, he closed his hand around the long, thick shaft. Rhicer's hips lifted from the mossy bed of their own accord, his entire body energized by the galvanic contact. Already, the sight of Kanath's face transformed by his release had left the blond's control wavering. He had held off,
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna though, hoping for this exact event. He would never have asked Kanath to reciprocate when he himself had only just come to terms with the idea of their sexual interactions, but he had hoped his lover would return his attentions. The reality was far more than he could ever have imagined. The hard length was heavy in Kanath’s hand, the angle slightly awkward as he knelt facing his lover. He momentarily considered moving behind Rhicer so the movement of his hand would be more like stroking his own erection, but that would deprive him of the vision of his lover’s face etched with passion. He would simply have to get used to the angle. The tip of Rhicer’s cock leaked fluid steadily, coating Kanath’s knuckles. Pausing for a minute, the younger man ran his palm across the mushroomed head, coating his skin with the slick fluid before returning his attention to the long shaft. Rhicer moaned and bucked into his hand, bringing a pleased smile to Kanath’s lips at the thought that he could please his lover as well as he had been pleased. Feeling daring, he used his free hand to reach between Rhicer’s legs and fondle the heavy sac. That unexpected touch broke Rhicer’s control, his orgasm leaving him limp and quivering beneath Kanath's hands. Blindly, Rhicer reached out for his lover, pulling the other man into his arms. His lieutenant came willingly enough, head cradled on Rhicer's shoulder as it had been so many times before. The difference was in the lack of barriers between them and the incredible climaxes they had each wrung from the other. In harmony with the world for that moment in time, Rhicer kissed the dark curls on the top of Kanath's head, smiling as his lover tilted his face up for a real kiss. Rhicer indulged him eagerly, their lips brushing repeatedly, tenderly, neither deepening the kiss, simply enjoying the moment of post-coital bliss before the real world
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna intruded again. With a sigh, Rhicer relaxed onto the moss, content for the time being to stay as they were. The most amazing sense of well-being suffused him as they lay there in each other's arms. “I love you, Kanath.”
“RHICER!” He turned at the sound of his name. “Yes, my Lord?” he asked when he saw his liege lord approaching. It had been a month since the wedding that had ended the war between their country and Mordyna. He had never seen his sovereign looking happier. It seemed that marriage agreed with the older man. Rhicer suppressed a smile as he considered the previous month. He, too, had never been happier, though he had taken pains to hide it, wanting to avoid questions he dared not answer. “I have been thinking,” the king declared, linking his arm through his captain's and leading him toward his study. “We have been a country at war for too long. It is time we began to think like men of peace.” Rhicer had the sudden memory of the wise woman, Mistress Rodard, scorning men for their warring ways. “I think that is a marvelous idea,” he agreed. “What do you propose?” Smiling, the king pulled a rose from the bouquet that adorned his desk, one of the many changes Nische had wrought in the keep, and slid the stem in next to the laces of his friend's tunic. “I find it much easier to think of peaceful
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna things now that I have my lady wife to remind me of them,” he explained. Rhicer froze, his eyes caught by the rose. He and Kanath had returned to the ruins frequently over the past month, always to find the rosebuds there ready to burst into bloom without ever opening. He had given up trying to explain, simply accepting that it would be that way. He had even come to think of the flower as their own personal sigil. Though the keep was often decorated in the lush blooms, the flowers were always open, releasing their soft fragrance. He wanted to throw the flower away, to reject what would surely be his king's next comment, but he dared not raise the man's suspicions. ”You certainly seem happier now,” Rhicer allowed neutrally. “I am,” the king agreed. “It is past time you had a wife of your own.” Rhicer shook his head. ”No, I cannot. It would not be right,” he protested immediately. “My heart is already taken.” “By a woman dead these twenty years,” the king reminded him. “You have mourned her long enough, Rhicer. She threw her life away needlessly, and now you are doing the same thing. Would she not have wanted you happy?” Rhicer was not sure, given Eldvese's mind-set before her death, whether she truly would have wanted him to be happy, but he did not say that aloud. “I am happy,” he said instead. And it was true. Despite the necessary secrecy, despite the time that passed between their assignations, he was happy with Kanath, happier than he had been even when Eldvese was alive. They managed to slip away to the ruins together three or four times a week, the stolen hours filled with passion. They had not yet made love, Rhicer being nervous about broaching the subject, but Kanath's hands 63
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna and mouth were pure magic, and he did not even feel the lack. King Emyl's expression clearly conveyed his disbelief. “You need something to live for besides your duties,” he insisted. “We had no choice these many long years, but that time is over now. You are free to dedicate yourself to something… someone else.” He already had. Telling the king that, though, was not an option, not when his friend would then immediately demand to know who. “Really, your Highness, I am perfectly content as I am,” Rhicer insisted. “Perhaps ‘your Highness’ would believe that, but I am speaking as your friend, not your commander. Surely you can understand my desire to see my joy shared by others,” Emyl continued. “Mistress Todan, perhaps. She is young enough to give you children still, but not some flighty miss who would drive you crazy with her silliness.” Uncomfortable now, Rhicer shook his head, trying to find a way out of this conversation as quickly as possible. “She is a lovely lass, but not really what I am looking for,” he demurred. She was not at all what he was looking for. She was not Kanath. “No?” the other man asked, surprised. “Well, perhaps the Widow Bytor, then. You are more of an age with her, though she is still young enough to retain all of her beauty.” Objectively, Rhicer could admit that they were both beautiful women and would make some lucky men wonderful wives, but they could no longer spark his interest. He suspected, though he had no intention of finding out,
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna that neither of them would even be able to rouse him. Marriages were arranged for many reasons, but he hated the thought of condemning a woman to a loveless marriage with an unfaithful husband for no good purpose. The king was clearly determined, however, which meant finding a way to delay until he could invent an excuse his sovereign would accept. “I will consider it,” he allowed, “but if you will excuse me, I promised to meet Kanath so we could adjust the patrol schedules now that we are less under threat.” “You work too hard, Rhicer,” the king reprimanded gently. “I work hard so you don't have to,” Rhicer countered, walking to the door. He bowed slightly and left, wondering how he was going to explain all of this to his lover. He was still pondering that question when he reached Kanath’s chambers, where they had agreed to meet to discuss patrol schedules. As he knocked, he mused that one of the advantages of conducting an affair with his lieutenant was the number of excuses their shared responsibilities gave them to spend time closeted together discussing strategy. People were used to seeing them together so no one looked beyond that to the rest of what they were doing. Inside the room, Kanath paced nervously. It had become his routine as he waited for Rhicer, mind racing as he wondered what would transpire between them this time, his body aching for his lover’s touch, his mind afraid this would be the time Rhicer did not come, the time when his lover decided it was too much work hiding like this. Those doubts faded the moment Rhicer took him in his arms, but the minutes leading up to any meeting were fraught with tension. He imagined, sadly, that they would always be this way, for he would never have the kind of public, permanent
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna commitment that would ease those fears forever. His eyes fell on the bouquet of rosebuds on his dresser. Flowers now adorned many of the tables and chests in the keep, giving Kanath an excuse if anyone ever questioned the buds in his room. Only Rhicer knew where those blooms came from, for they had gathered them together the last time they had gone to the ruins. Over the past month, they had turned the little clearing into a haven for their love, arranging some of the tumbled stones to form a cairn where they kept a blanket on which to recline as they explored each other’s bodies. His hands and lips knew Rhicer’s body from head to foot now, as Rhicer’s knew his. Vivid images assailed him, of Rhicer’s hands stroking him to completion, of Rhicer’s tongue licking him clean. The first time his lover had done that, Kanath had almost pulled away, but Rhicer’s hands had stopped him. “Let me see if you taste as good as you feel,” he had murmured, and Kanath had been helpless to resist. Rhicer’s tongue was as talented as his hands, and Kanath had felt himself hardening again despite his recent climax. Rhicer had just smiled at him and licked a little more, until he was completely clean. It had taken several more encounters before Kanath worked through the reservations holding him back from reciprocating. He always made sure Rhicer found his release, but it had taken several amazing orgasms from—and in— Rhicer’s mouth before he finally worked up the courage to push his lover back onto the blanket and take the straining cock in his mouth. Even then, he had choked on it the first time, trying to take too much, too fast. Rhicer had not seemed to notice, though, too aroused by the whole situation to care. Kanath had taken his time after that, licking along the entire length, his hand caressing what his mouth did not
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna cover. The slightly bitter taste had surprised him at first, but it had not been unpleasant, just unexpected. A few more tentative tastes had been enough to convince him he could do this. After that, he had relaxed and concentrated on the sounds of pleasure escaping Rhicer's mouth, letting them guide his movements. He had gagged a little when his lover's creamy fluid filled his mouth, again because it was unexpected rather than unpleasant. The next time, he had swallowed it all with no problem. A knock interrupted his thoughts, and his heart leapt as he started toward the door. His memories had left him eager for Rhicer's touch, Rhicer's taste. He only hoped his lover was alone, because hiding the erection in his trousers would be impossible. Only Rhicer stood outside his door, but for once, the sight of his lover was not reassuring, for a rose adorned Rhicer's chest, not a rosebud like the ones in his room, but a full-blown bloom. Jealousy exploded inside him. He had no idea who had dared attach their symbol to his lover, but he would not stand for it. He grabbed Rhicer's hand, dragging him inside and pinning him against the wall. “What is this?” he demanded, pointing to the rose, while a small, still rational part of his mind pointed out that Rhicer would never be so cruel as to flaunt a betrayal in his face this way. Rhicer sighed. He had hoped for a reasonable conversation to figure out how to dissuade Emyl from his plans, but that was clearly going to have to wait. He lowered his head and kissed Kanath tenderly. “Our king is in love,” he observed, “and thinks that the entire court should share his happiness.”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “He gave you this?” Rhicer nodded. The frown on Kanath's face did not ease, though. “Why? What did he say?” There was no point in avoiding the truth. He would have to tell Kanath eventually, and the sooner he explained, the sooner he could weather the storm and move on. “He thinks I should marry. He wants me to be happy.” “You don't need to get married to be happy,” Kanath protested. Rhicer could not get married! He had just found his lover! He could not lose him now! His thoughts brought him up short. Only a few short weeks ago, he had dreamt of finding a woman to love, to marry, and had been angry when the love potion interfered with that. How things had changed! His only thoughts now were of Rhicer, of losing Rhicer, of being forced to watch the man he loved marry someone else. He could not do it. He could not bear that. “So I told him, but since I cannot tell him about you, he saw no reason to believe me,” Rhicer explained. “He has several suitable candidates in mind.” “No,” Kanath declared firmly, snatching the rose from Rhicer's tunic and throwing it to the floor. “They can't have you! You're mine.” He stalked away from Rhicer to the vase of rosebuds they had collected the day before. He snapped one off and prowled back to his lover, sliding the stem into the hole where the other rose had been. “You're mine,” he repeated. “Am I?” Rhicer questioned, a slight edge to his voice. He understood Kanath's jealousy, but he was uncomfortable with being claimed so starkly when they had never made any promises other than to see what happened between them.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “Of course you are,” Kanath replied, finally ready to name the emotion that had been growing within him for the past six weeks, sparked by the potion, but real now, regardless of the cause, “as I am yours. I love you, Rhicer, and I will not give you up. You cannot ask it of me.” “I have not,” Rhicer reminded him. “I will not, because that would require me to give you up as well. I could sooner stop breathing than I could stop loving you.” He pulled Kanath against him, letting his lover feel his sudden arousal, feeling the answering erection in the younger man's breeches. His entire body ached with desire. The concerns that had always held them back from coming together in the keep faded to nothing in the face of their growing lust, only thoughts of each other still occupying their minds. Rhicer bucked his hips against his lover's, desperate for release yet knowing that something fundamental had changed between them once again. Not even bothering to suggest waiting long enough to make it to their bower in the ruins, he pushed Kanath backward toward the bed, his hands flying over his lover's body, separating him deftly from his clothes. Kanath's hands reciprocated immediately, setting the rosebud aside carefully, then all but tearing Rhicer's clothes away. They fell onto the straw mattress, their hands flying over each other's skin, seeking sensitive places without having to guess now, their caresses no less powerful for being familiar, but this time, Rhicer wanted something more. Each step they had taken as they made love had followed a pattern: Rhicer showing Kanath the possibilities and then Kanath reciprocating in his own time. Rhicer had not minded that at all, not when his lover always made him feel so good. Now that the moment had come to take the final step, though, he thought it wise to reverse, slightly, their 69
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna roles. He already knew, from his early experimentation, that having Kanath's fingers—and by extension his cock—inside him would feel good. Rather than waste time trying to convince Kanath to let him demonstrate, he would simply have to convince Kanath to touch him, to take him that way. Later, when his lover was comfortable with the idea, he would reciprocate. Grabbing Kanath's hand where it was busy fisting his cock, Rhicer guided it instead to his entrance. He arched immediately into the touch when he felt his lover's fingers brush the puckered flesh. It lasted only a second before Kanath jerked his hand away. “What are you doing?” he demanded. Kanath had been as lost in their passion as Rhicer, already eager for release, but Rhicer's unexpected actions had broken through the haze of desire, shattering the familiarity that let him rush forward at such a headlong pace. He pulled away, panting, trying to reconcile the obvious invitation with his own, very real fears. “I want you,” Rhicer said simply, “in every way possible.” Kanath shook his head, looking down at the size of his erection. “This will never work. I'll hurt you!” Remembering his own experiment, Rhicer shook his head. “You just need something to ease the way a little. Where's your flaxseed oil? It will help.” Kanath's frown deepened. “How do you know?” Rhicer flushed. “I tried it. I lay in bed thinking of you, thinking of what it would mean to make love with you, and I tried it. You're right, it can hurt, but if you stretch me with your fingers first, and use plenty of oil, it will be fine. Better
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna than fine. Trust me, Kanath. I want this. Think how good it will feel to you, sinking into me. You can't tell me a part of you hasn't missed having your cock sheathed and squeezed while we made love. You can have that. All you have to do is agree.” Rhicer's words painted a picture Kanath had trouble resisting. He was not entirely sure this would work, but Rhicer's confidence was catching and his words seductive. Deciding he could always stop if it became clear Rhicer was not enjoying himself, Kanath rolled from the bed to grab the pot of oil he kept to dampen his whetstone. Returning to the bed, he asked one more time, “Are you sure?” “I love you, Kanath, and I want you. Come and claim me.” To highlight his words, he spread his legs wide, bending his knees to expose himself completely to Kanath's gaze. Given the fears and jealousy that had consumed Kanath earlier, it was an invitation he could not refuse. Caution, though, slowed his hand as he dipped his fingers in the oil. “Talk to me,” he urged. “Tell me what you're feeling.” “Right now?” Rhicer asked, a slow grin crossing his face. “Right now, I'm feeling empty, longing to be filled with your fingers, your cock.” Kanath shivered at the husky, inviting words. Taking a deep breath to remind himself to go slowly, he pushed one finger against the puckered flesh. He almost gave up when his finger did not immediately slide inside, but just as he was about to pull his hand away, the muscle gave way, admitting his digit into the tight, clenching channel. He gasped, amazed at the sensation and the look of wonder on Rhicer's face. “Talk to me,” he prompted again.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “Feels good,” Rhicer gasped, shifting against Kanath's finger, trying to work it deeper within him so that it would brush the spot he had discovered during his own explorations. Kanath seemed to take the hint, sliding his finger in to the second knuckle. “Move your finger around,” Rhicer instructed. “Somewhere, there's a little bump. It's what will make having you inside me so incredible.” More than a little uneasy still with an idea that had honestly not crossed his mind, Kanath did as Rhicer instructed, searching for the spot his lover had described. The hoarse shout that escaped Rhicer's lips almost made Kanath pull away, but Rhicer's words stopped him. “Oh, God, Kan,” he moaned. “Do that again.” Kanath did, the sound of the nickname his lover had given him bringing a smile to his lips finally. Surely Rhicer would not be using that name if he did not like what Kanath was doing, and that was more than enough incentive to run his finger across the little nub again. Another pleased moan encouraged another firm touch, until Rhicer was writhing on the bed. “Add another finger,” he begged, knowing he could come from Kanath's attentions, but wanting his lover inside him. Kanath hesitated only a second before complying, withdrawing his finger and pushing back inside with two. Again, he felt the muscle clench tightly before slowly releasing. He did not hesitate this time, though, his fingers searching immediately for the little bump. Rhicer hissed at the pain of the stretch, but it lasted only until Kanath's fingers stimulated his sweet spot again, the bolt of pleasure from that touch far outweighing the pinch of being stretched. He had done this once before, but it could not even begin to compare with this experience, with the 72
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna heady thought that it was Kanath's fingers stretching him this time, Kanath who would soon be filling him as no one else had ever, or would ever, do. Kanath's cock throbbed as he watched Rhicer undulate beneath his touch. His lover had always been responsive, but seeing him now… it was different, more somehow, more abandoned, more desperate, more needy. He wanted to satisfy every need, every desire he could see burning in Rhicer's heated blue gaze. Without prompting, he added a third finger, mentally measuring his cock against the girth already stretching his lover's portal. Feeling Kanath begin to take control, Rhicer hitched his knees up higher, pushing back into the invading fingers. He groaned softly, trying to form the words to tell his lover how good he felt, how much he wanted the other man inside him. The words would not come, though, his mind too overcome with sensation to focus on anything else. Instead, he reached blindly for the oil, spilling some into his palm, his hand moving to Kanath's cock, coating it with the thick fluid. “In me,” he requested. “Please.” Kanath stared down at Rhicer. He had known where this was leading—Rhicer had made it very clear what he wanted—but to hear his lover pleading for it so bluntly threw him off balance. Could he really do this? Could he really stick his cock up another man's arse? “It's all right, Kan,” Rhicer said, seeing the hesitation on Kanath's face. “I want this.” “Honestly?” Kanath asked, wanting to make sure. “Yes,” Rhicer promised, the hiatus in his lover's movements letting him catch his breath enough to explain his thoughts. “It feels so good having your fingers inside me. 73
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna I'm stretched and full and eager for the rest. I can only imagine what it will feel like to have you inside me, thrusting slow and deep, but having your fingers in me is a hundred times better than I imagined it could be. I can't even begin to guess how good it will feel to have your cock filling me. Please, Kanath. Let me feel that. Let me feel us joined in body as we are already joined in heart.” Kanath did not ask again. He would not belittle that powerful declaration by questioning it. He slid his fingers slowly from Rhicer's body and shifted between the widespread knees. He took himself in hand and lined the head of his cock up with his lover's clenching opening. “Tell me if it hurts,” he requested, not wanting to do anything that would cause his lover pain. When Rhicer nodded, he leaned forward, pushing inside. He heard Rhicer hiss as soon as his cockhead passed the tight ring of muscle, and he froze, waiting for some sign to continue. He trembled with the strain of holding back. Rhicer's body squeezed him repeatedly as it spasmed, and it was all Kanath could do not to thrust in with all his strength, wanting to feel that clenching massage along the entire length of his cock. Rhicer appreciated Kanath's restraint as he struggled to adjust to the additional stretch of Kanath's erection inside him. He wanted this. Even with the burn of this first penetration, he wanted it, but his body was fighting it. He panted rapidly as he tried to relax. “Touch me,” he pleaded, hoping that would help distract him. Kanath shifted to do as Rhicer requested, the movement pushing him further into Rhicer's body. His surprised gasp mirrored Rhicer's as he took his lover in hand again, stroking the lolling shaft firmly.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Kanath's touch had the desired effect, the renewed surge of desire relaxing Rhicer's muscles, letting him accept the loving invasion. “Move,” he said finally, his hips beginning to rock against the cock impaling him. Kanath let out the breath he had not been aware of holding, as he pushed slowly deeper into Rhicer's body, his hips rolling forward and back, surging and retreating in a familiar rhythm that had, nonetheless, taken on an entirely new complexion. Never before had his cock been sheathed so tightly by a lover. Never before had a lover met his thrusts so firmly. Never before had he been in love with his lover. That, he knew, more than anything else, made the difference. Rhicer's gaze glistened with love as well as lust, an expression he was coming to covet jealously. He thrust with a little more force as thoughts of the king trying to marry Rhicer off penetrated the haze of love and lust. “Mine,” he growled as he thrust again. The possessive tone of Kanath's voice combined with the sudden brushing of his lover's cock over that susceptible spot sent shivers of passion along Rhicer's nerves. “Yours,” he agreed breathlessly. “Now and always.” Kanath drove deep into Rhicer's body, sheathing himself completely as he lowered his head to his lover's, their lips meeting in a tender kiss that belied the passion simmering between them. For a moment, they stayed there motionless, frozen in a tableau of ecstasy as their hearts spoke silent vows of love and devotion. Then their bodies took over again, their mouths separating to breathe as their control broke, hips straining together, point and counterpoint. Though each would have prolonged this moment indefinitely, for the pure joy of being one, frail flesh betrayed them, their climaxes coming far faster than either would
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna have preferred, Rhicer's seed coating their bellies and rubbing slickly between them, Kanath's filling Rhicer's body to overflowing, trickling down to the sheets below them. Kanath's arms trembled with the strain of supporting his weight, but he did not want to crush Rhicer beneath him or move away and separate their bodies. Rhicer took the choice away from him, arms encircling the other man's shoulders, pulling him down to rest fully on his supine lover. “I am not a fragile thing you need worry about crushing,” he reminded his lover. “I want to feel your weight on me. I want to know this is finally real, not some product of fevered dreams and wild imagination.” Kanath smiled, stirring his hips slightly. “It is real,” he promised, lowering his head to kiss Rhicer tenderly before cradling his head in the curve of his lover's neck. They lay in sated, contented silence for some time before Kanath lifted his head again. “You cannot marry,” he said seriously, “yet I doubt our king will accept a simple refusal. He is nothing if not persistent. What are we going to do?” Rhicer sighed, pulling Kanath's head back down to his shoulder. He wanted to pretend the situation did not exist, to imagine that they could continue as they had this past month, loving each other in secret, presenting the face of comrades to the world. Unfortunately, that no longer seemed feasible. “I don't know,” he replied softly. “Are we asking too much to be allowed to love each other in peace?” “Apparently,” Kanath replied sadly. He burrowed into Rhicer's neck, clinging desperately. “I won't lose you. I won't let them take you from me.”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “I won't go,” Rhicer promised. “Nothing the king could offer or threaten is enough to make me marry someone else when I love you more than anything.” Unable to resist the whispered words, Kanath closed his lips over his lover's, tongue sliding inside to find its mate, twining together as their bodies remained entwined. To his surprise, he could feel his cock twitch where it still lay embedded in Rhicer's body. He almost pulled back, but Rhicer's legs lifted just then, encircling his hips. “I can feel you,” the blond murmured, nipping at his lover's lower lip. “You're swelling inside me. It feels so good. You make me feel so good.” Kanath's heart overflowed at the tender words, affirming their budding relationship, both physical and emotional. So much had happened, so much had changed, and through it all, Rhicer had been his constant. As long as he had known the older man, he had been Kanath's constant. That sudden realization had him looking at his lover with new eyes. Yes, the love between them had started with the potion, but the gentleness, the tenderness, the caring between them were longstanding, and far more important than he had ever given them credit for being. Hands trembling at the revelation, he stroked Rhicer's face gently. “I love you,” he said again. “Not because the potion makes me, but because you are kind and noble, loyal, handsome, selfless, generous, tolerant, courageous, intelligent, honorable. I fell in love with you because of the potion, but I'd be a fool to deny the depth of my feelings now.” He did not wait for Rhicer's answer, knowing his lover would surely feel obliged to reply with a list of Kanath's stellar qualities, but the younger man was not interested in hearing them. Another time, perhaps, but now he wanted
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna only to show Rhicer how he felt. Lowering his head, he cut off any words that might have escaped his lover's lips, stopping them with a kiss of infinite tenderness, infinite beauty, the promise of years to come, layered with passion and love, a communion of souls to surpass any other love, any other loyalty. They would never know the blessing of the gods, old or new, but they did not even need that, not when they had each other, not when the simple press of their bodies together filled them with a sense of joy and fulfillment that nothing else had ever rivaled. Rhicer wanted to reciprocate Kanath's declaration, having realized some weeks before that what he felt for his lover was far too personal to be merely the product of the elixir, but doing so would have meant drawing away from his companion's lips, and he had absolutely no desire to do that. Instead, he poured his dedication into their kiss, his hands cradling Kanath's head, fingers twining through the long, mahogany curls. Though fraught with emotion, the kiss remained gentle, lips brushing, separating, and brushing again, an ebb and flow as ageless and inexorable as the tide. Their passion stirred beneath the surface, but for the first time since they drank the potion, it was banked, warming them, but not controlling them, giving them the space to truly explore each other leisurely, languidly, lovingly. They took advantage of the time, kissing in the lazy way of sated lovers, craving the contact, but not yet desperate for more. The desperation would come in time, driving them to reaffirm their love, but that would be later. For now, they basked in the warm, soaking pleasure, letting it ease the fears and concerns for their future. This was what was real, this was what mattered. Everything else simply faded away.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Eventually, Kanath lifted his head, looking down into the pellucid eyes, seeing the love he felt reflected there. Shifting a little, but careful not to dislodge himself from his lover's body, he traced the strong features with tender digits, memorizing the beloved visage once again. Rhicer's eyes drifted shut beneath the loving caress. He did not want to miss a single moment, a single expression that crossed Kanath's face, but he could not seem to help himself, the force of his emotions stronger than he expected. His head tilted into the moving hand, not willing to sacrifice a single instant of contact. Being with Kanath still filled him with amazement, their interaction so different from what he had always known before. With Kanath, he did not have to be the seducer. He could lie back, at times, and give up control to his lover, trusting that Kanath would gladly take on the dominant role. Though they had not talked about it in exactly those terms, Rhicer suspected Kanath actually preferred that role. He hoped, with time, to persuade his lover to accept the tender caresses he had just bestowed on the older man. If that never happened, though, Rhicer would still be content. How could he not be with Kanath at his side? His hands ghosted across Kanath's back, relearning the contours of muscles that bunched and released beneath his stroking. He thought he could spend hours engaged this way, simply touching. If their situation had been different, they could have indulged that desire, within the bounds of propriety, anytime they wanted. As it was, they were limited to a few stolen hours. Resentment grew in Rhicer's heart, railing at the unfairness of the situation. He and Kanath would never have the moments that were such a part of the lives of ordinary couples. They would never be able to stroll through the market hand in hand, for the pure pleasure of
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna being together. They would never be able to shower each other with little tokens of their affection, for fear that someone would question them and discover their relationship. As much as he hated to think of it, they would spend their lives skulking through the shadows, hiding their love like an illicit affair. Pushing those thoughts aside, he focused back on the moment at hand. They had too few of them to waste what little time they did have on regrets. His hips lifted, lodging Kanath more deeply inside him. “Make love with me again,” he murmured. A sharp rap startled them, their eyes meeting in growing panic as each tried to remember if he had locked the door. They had their answer when the heavy door swung open. “Kanath!” Rynes called as he walked inside in the way of longtime friends who know they are welcome unless the door is locked. The sight that met his gaze was something he would never have expected to see: his two best friends, in bed, together, obviously naked, obviously…. His mind shied away from the thought of what must surely be happening beneath the bedsheets. “What the hell is going on?” he demanded, long-ingrained attitudes rearing their vicious heads. Kanath's shoulders slumped, his head dropping to Rhicer's neck as if he could somehow hide from Rynes' question. Rhicer did not bother with the curses that rose in his throat. Cursing the situation was pointless. Cursing Rynes' importune arrival would only alienate their friend further than he already was. If they had any hope of continuing their lives as they had the past month, they had to gain his cooperation.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “Shut the door and we'll explain,” he ordered softly, his arms encircling Kanath protectively as he waited to see how Rynes would react. Explain? Rynes was quite sure no amount of explanation could change the evidence before his eyes or his reaction to it, but these were his friends—his closest friends, men he had trusted with his life more times than he could count— and he would do them the courtesy of hearing them out. He shut and locked the door and turned back to the bed where neither man showed any inclination to move apart. “I'm listening.”
RHICER stood in the shadows of the fallen arches of an old building they intended to convert to a stable and mews, time and energy permitting, watching Kanath tie the rosebud to Taen's leg. A smile crossed his face as he watched his lover's graceful movements. He did not think he would ever tire of watching the other man. When Kanath had completed his task and released his falcon, Rhicer stepped up behind him, encircling him with gentle, loving arms. “Happy?” he asked softly. “Very,” Kanath replied, leaning back against his lover. He looked around the plot of land they had claimed for their own, high in the mountains, away from any who would bother them. As they had settled in their new home, they had laughed together over the ruins that surrounded their little hut and the rosebush that sprang up among them. Kanath swore the bush had not been there when he first
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna found the cabin, but they had decided not to question it. “Best decision I ever made,” he added. Rhicer laughed at that. “When we first drank the potion, I thought our lives were ruined.” “And now?” Kanath asked, though he knew the answer. He reached behind him and pulled Rhicer’s head forward for a light kiss. “Now, I’m glad that you never got over your light-fingered ways.” Kanath chuckled. “Why is that?” “Because,” Rhicer explained in a conspiratorial whisper, “if you hadn't filched that love potion, we wouldn't be here together now. And that is too terrible a thought to contemplate.” Kanath's smile widened and his laughter broke from him in merry waves. It had taken many days and much loving for him to believe Rhicer truly meant that, but his doubts had faded as they made their plans and traveled to their new home. “Take me to bed and prove it,” he challenged. With a lighthearted grin, Rhicer grabbed Kanath's hand, pulling him toward their home. Kanath laughed joyously at the freedom to be together as they crossed the threshold. Their abode was simple still, just the one room, but they had managed to make it a place of their own. Their pots and dishes lined the shelves, their bedrolls intermingled over a pallet of straw, just as their lives had become one. Rhicer caught Kanath against him tightly, lowering the lighter body of his lover onto the blankets. He had intended to spend the afternoon building a bed frame, but now that the opportunity had presented itself, he would rather spend 82
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna the time making love. Kanath’s legs parted willingly, wrapping around him as his weight pressed the brunet into the straw. Stroking the blond’s hair, Kanath pretended to ponder the situation for a moment. “I think it’s your turn to be on top,” he declared after a moment. “Keeping track?” Rhicer teased. “I wouldn’t want you to feel left out,” Kanath retorted playfully. In truth, he did not care how they loved, just so long as they did, but his own early fears about losing himself to Rhicer’s dominance had left him with a need to make sure the reverse was true as well, even though he knew Rhicer did not see it that way at all. “All I need—all I ever need—is to know that you love me,” Rhicer swore, his hands moving over the lithely muscled body. “Nothing else matters but that.” It was the truth. Having known the joy of Kanath making love to him, Rhicer had never pressed his lover to switch roles. Eventually, though, Kanath had asked, saying he wanted to know the pleasure Rhicer obviously found in their joining. It had been a long, tender communion, the first of many. Rhicer did not complain about Kanath’s desire to keep their relationship balanced, but that did not figure on his list of concerns. Still, with his lover beneath him, beginning to writhe invitingly, Rhicer was not about to counter Kanath’s suggestion. Together, they squirmed their way out of their clothes, not wanting to be parted for a moment, even if it would have facilitated their disrobing. Contact mattered more than speed, and the thought of separating for even a moment held no appeal when they had feared to be separated forever. 83
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Soon enough, they lay together with no barriers left, hairdusted chest brushing smooth skin as their lips met and held, that union as vital as the eventual joining of their bodies. They rolled across the straw pallet, moving this way and that as they worked to arouse each other’s passions to fiery heights. Lips nipped, tongues licked, hands caressed every inch of bare flesh they could find, lingering over sensitive spots, making new ones by their mere presence, until both men were dripping with their need. Kanath rolled to his stomach, pushing up onto his knees as he rocked back against Rhicer’s groin in blatant invitation. Rhicer did not reach for the oil, however. Instead, he lowered his head, catching the bucking hips in his hand, and licked a wet stripe from Kanath’s pendulous sac all the way to the base of his spine and back down again, stopping when he reached the roseate opening that would soon stretch to receive him. He heard Kanath’s gasp of surprise, but he did not pause, his tongue swiping repeatedly across the sensitive flesh until his attentions won a long, low moan from his frantic lover. He had often wondered about loving Kanath this way, but he had never dared. Now, however, in their own home, safe from all prying eyes and ears, he took that liberty, licking at the tight hole until it clenched and then slowly unfurled for him. Tightening his grip on Kanath’s hips, he rolled his tongue and worked it inside the guardian ring, waiting with bated breath for his lover’s reaction. Kanath’s breath rushed out in a muted wail, his body bucking wildly. “More,” he begged. “By all the gods, Rhicer, do that again!”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Rhicer obliged, thrusting his tongue in and out of the tight portal the way he would soon do with his cock. He was tempted to reach between his legs and stroke his aching shaft, but if he did, he feared he would release too soon, and he had no intention of finding joy anywhere but inside Kanath’s tight arse. Instead, he reached between Kanath’s legs, stroking the erection he found there in time with the penetration of his tongue. “Too… much!” Kanath groaned, trying to pull away before Rhicer made him climax, but his lover’s grip was implacable. With a harsh wail, he climaxed, his seed covering his lover’s hand and the blankets below them. Rhicer did not pause in his attentions, milking Kanath’s cock until it stopped twitching, then continuing to work it until it began to fill again. Rocking back on his heels, he reached for the oil with his other hand, coating his fingers so he could finish the happy task of preparing his lover to take him Slipping two fingers inside easily, he crooked them until he found the spot that made Kanath cry out, begging wildly. With Kanath’s thrashing as encouragement, Rhicer increased the pace, plundering the willing passage until Kanath was sobbing with his need. His own desire mounting exponentially with each pass of his fingers across his lover’s bundle of nerves, with each hoarse plea, Rhicer finally pulled back, flipping Kanath onto his back. Whatever configuration of limbs they used as they built their desire, they always made love face to face. Always. They needed to see each other’s eyes, to meet each other’s mouths, to have that reassurance that they were not simply fucking but instead recommitting their lives and their hearts to each other. Kanath lifted his legs to Rhicer’s shoulders, rocking his hips onto his lover’s thighs so he was completely open to the
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna shaft that bored into him, taking him, claiming him. Loving him. It only took a moment for the hard cock to slide home, filling his body with its length and girth, filling his heart with a love that defied definition or explanation, but simply was. A love society could not snuff out. A love he would never hide again. He cried out his rapture, eyes closing as he felt Rhicer bend over him, folding him nearly in two as the blond sought his lips. Kanath offered them willingly, avidly, the final connection that set his soul soaring, his release burning through him, spilling out on his belly between them as Rhicer’s anointed his eager sheath. Rhicer shifted, letting Kanath’s legs settle around his waist as he continued to rock into his lover’s passage, his erection slowly shrinking. He did not pull out right away, though. He never did, maintaining the connection between them as long as he could. Kanath’s inner muscles squeezed him tightly as if loath to let him slip free. Finally, though, his cock slipped out, too lax to continue the connection. He rolled to the side, pulling Kanath with him so they lay facing each other, their lips still brushing tenderly as they came down from the high of making love. “This can’t be wrong,” Kanath said after a moment. “No matter what we were taught, no matter what the court believes, I know this can’t be the evil we were taught to believe.” “It isn’t,” Rhicer agreed, “but neither is it a battle we can fight alone. As much as I miss Rynes, and even Emyl, we would never have a life together there, even a hidden one, and I will not give you up. Not for anything.” “Nor I you,” Kanath swore. “But if a time comes when we can go back….”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “If that time comes, Rynes will find a way to let us know,” Rhicer assured his lover. “And if it does, then we will go back, secure in our love and our place, but I will not risk your life, our lives, unless we know it is safe. ’Tis better to live here alone but together than to face separation or worse.” “I love you, Rhicer.” “And I love you. Now sleep. Taen will bring what news Rynes can contrive to send eventually, but for now, we have our own lives to lead.” Kanath nodded, his eyes closed, his head fitting perfectly into the crook of Rhicer’s shoulder. As he drifted off, the thought occurred to him that their affair had started with them sleeping very much like this, with the exception of the conspicuous absence of any clothing to separate them. He only hoped his dreams tonight were as vivid as they were then, because this time, Rhicer would be there in the morning to help him make them a reality.
THE screech of a falcon drew Rynes' attention. “Taen!” he exclaimed excitedly, stretching out his arm for the regal bird. “What news do you bring me, old girl?” As if she understood the question perfectly, the raptor extended her right leg. A smile broke out on Rynes' face as he saw what she carried. Carefully, he unwrapped the string that held the rosebud to the bird's claw. “Good news, then,” he murmured 87
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna with satisfaction, stroking the falcon's feathers gently. “Let's get you a treat before you head off home.” A pang of regret took him at that thought. Home, for Taen and for his friends, was no longer the king's keep, perhaps no longer even Ageselm. Three weeks ago, he had stood with them in the misty light of dawn and said goodbye, knowing he would probably never see them again. It tore at him that he had not been able to help them, to protect them from the forces that would have ripped them apart if they had stayed. He had listened to them, the day he found them in bed together. A part of him had wanted to reject their words, but he had been unable to repudiate the obvious love that radiated from them as they explained about the potion that had bound them, will they or nil they, about how they had sought to break the spell unsuccessfully. They had been candid with him about their initial reluctance, even revulsion, but what had struck him most was how carefully they had chosen their words, glancing at each other surreptitiously the entire time, as if to ensure that they were not hurting each other with thoughtless speech. That solicitude had done more to convince him of the true depth of feeling between them than anything they said aloud. “So what happens now?” Rynes had asked finally. “That depends on you,” Rhicer replied, his voice tight with concern. “Will you keep our secret?” Rynes had been shocked at the question before he realized just how precarious a life his friends were living, even without anyone knowing. “Of course,” he promised them, his conviction ringing in his voice. He did not claim to understand what they felt for each other, but it was clear to him that this was not a simple affair, not a matter of lust 88
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna overriding their good sense. As alien as it seemed to him, they loved each other enough to defy all reason, all convention. It had not been as straightforward as keeping their secret, though. However innocently and unintentionally, the king had slowly made their lives impossible. Rhicer had explained about their sovereign's desire to see him married, saying, too, that the old excuses—Eldvese, the war, his duties—no longer seemed to register with the love-struck monarch. Rynes had seen the same matchmaking desire directed toward himself and other members of the court, but he had not been particularly bothered by the notion, the idea of having someone to come home to attractive enough to lull him into acceptance. “I don't know what to tell him. I can't tell him the truth, yet I can't sit back and do nothing while he arranges my marriage to one lady or another. If he forced me to go through with it, I would be caught between making a mockery of my wedding vows and forsaking a love I never expected to find but now hold more dear to me than anything else.” Kanath had rejected that notion out of hand, his vehemence astonishing Rynes. He was used to thinking of the younger man simply as Rhicer's lieutenant, but the fierceness of his expression reminded Rynes that Kanath was no mere cipher. He had no answer to give them, but he knew in that moment that he would help them in any way he could. At first, helping them had been simple: keep their secret. He had not even minded being their confidant, the only one to whom they could talk about their situation and their feelings for each other. They had respected his sensibilities enough not to give him details he did not want to hear. He might have accepted that they loved each other irrevocably, 89
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna and even accepted that their love found physical expression, but he definitely did not want to hear about it. Seeing them once had been far more detail than he ever desired to know. Whatever else he was, and he was many things, he had never been a voyeur. As the days had passed and their impatience with the situation grew, though, Rynes' role had become more complicated. Their disappearances began to be noticed and questions began to be asked. He warned them to be more careful, but they did not seem to register his concerns. Then his liege had approached him one day. “I am worried about Rhicer,” the monarch had begun. “He has not been himself since my wedding.” Rynes knew exactly how true that was, though the change had started even before that, but the king had been too busy to notice. He could not tell his sovereign that, though. Instead, he shrugged noncommittally, hoping to let it go at that. King Emyl was too tenacious, however. “I want to know what is going on,” he had continued. “Has he confided in you at all?” Rynes was torn. Rhicer had confided in him, more than once, but they were not secrets Rynes could share with anyone, and not only because they were not his secrets to share. Revealing what he knew could well see his friends outcast or even killed. Yet to lie to his king…. In the end, the enormity of the consequences outweighed his discomfort with lying to King Emyl and he had prevaricated, trying to avoid an outright lie. “I am sure there is nothing wrong,” he replied. “Rhicer would have told us if there was.”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna That much was true. As far as the blond captain was concerned, nothing was wrong at all, except for the prohibitions that forbade him to be open about his love for Kanath. The king, however, was not convinced. “I want you to follow him,” the monarch ordered. “Find out where he goes when he disappears and why.” “Sire!” Rynes protested, realizing this was an order he would never be able to follow. “You act as if Rhicer were some outlaw, a criminal bent on… I know not what. He is your trusted captain. Why would you ask me to spy on him this way?” “Because something is wrong, Rynes,” Emyl repeated, “and he will not let me help him any other way.” Rynes frowned, but nodded, hoping the king would accept that as his agreement. He did follow Rhicer that day, down a path into the woods he had never trod before, discovering the ruins that had been a haven for his friends. That much was obvious from the blankets spread upon the leaf-covered ground. To his relief, the lovers were still clothed when he entered the clearing, though any who came upon them thus would have no doubt about the nature of their assignation. Arms encircled each other, Kanath's hands cupping Rhicer's arse, Rhicer's hand between them, obviously stroking Kanath's groin. He watched them for a moment, struck by the beauty of their entwined forms, by the way they seemed to fit together perfectly. It went against everything he had ever been taught, but the love and passion between them was so patently obvious that he could not help but feel it was right. It made his own random encounters with the court women seem suddenly empty. He cleared his throat to get their attention, but the sound did not penetrate the lusty haze that surrounded them.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “Rhicer! Kanath!” he called sharply, not wanting them to progress further down the path they seemed intent on following with him standing right there. When he had walked in on them before, the bedclothes had at least hidden all but the fact that they were making love. Nothing would be hidden from him if they continued as they were. They looked up upon hearing their names, but they did not move apart, though their hands stilled so that they were simply holding each other instead of actively arousing. “What are you doing here?” Rhicer asked slowly. “Spying on you,” Rynes replied bitterly. “What?” Kanath demanded, pulling away from Rhicer as if to come after Rynes. Rynes held his hands up in appeasement. “The king ordered me to follow Rhicer and find out where he's been going when he suddenly disappears from the keep. Be glad ’twas me he approached and not someone else, because no one finding you as I just did would have any doubt what you were about to do.” Both men scowled at his announcement, but Kanath was the one who spoke. “Why is he fixated on Rhicer?” “Concern for a friend,” Rynes insisted. “He sees his friend and very reliable captain suddenly acting very differently than he always has before, slipping away with no explanation, disappearing for hours on end, avoiding him even when he is around. What is he supposed to think? Until a few months ago, the king was as much Rhicer's confidant as I was. And now he is not.” “You wouldn't be either if you hadn't barged in on us,” Rhicer pointed out, with a low chuckle.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “Be glad I did,” Rynes contradicted. “Otherwise, you'd be in trouble right now.” “We're still in trouble right now, aren't we?” Kanath asked. Rynes shrugged. “Maybe. We have to invent a plausible excuse, one that will keep Emyl from having Rhicer followed again and from insisting on a wedding, or else yes, you're in trouble. I won't be able to stall him for long when I get back. He'll have noticed Rhicer's disappearance and want an explanation. Fortunately, he has not seemed to realize yet that you go missing every time Rhicer does. Otherwise, your lives would be even more complicated.” Frustration crossed Rhicer's face as he sank to the blankets, pulling Kanath with him. He seemed surprised, Rynes noticed, when Kanath sat next to him. Clearly, that was not Kanath's usual seat, another little sign of how ingrained the intimacy between them had become. “Sit down, Rynes,” he said, gesturing to the opposite end of the blanket. Rynes took the offered seat, not sure what Rhicer wanted, but he had the feeling it would not be a short conversation. He waited in patient silence for his friend to begin. He could not have said what he expected at that point—perhaps a discussion of what story to give to Emyl— but he had certainly not expected the defeat on Rhicer's face as he buried his head in his hands. “I don't know what to do anymore,” Rhicer muttered, his distress obvious in every line of his bent shoulders, in the way his voice cracked as he spoke. Rynes started to reply, to assure his friend that they would find a way, but he never had the chance to speak. Kanath's arms went around Rhicer immediately, pulling him into a comforting embrace that had nothing to do with the passion Rynes had glimpsed earlier. 93
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna “Don't say that,” the younger man insisted. “You can't give up on us. If you stop believing in our love, then everything is lost.” Feeling far more like a voyeur than when he had found them in bed together, Rynes watched in silence as Kanath slid tender fingers beneath Rhicer's chin, tipping his head up so their eyes met. His heart cried out in protest at the thought of anything threatening this bond. He might not understand it, might never understand it, but he had gone beyond questioning it. If anything, he found himself envying it. “There has to be a way,” Kanath said softly, his voice husky with emotion as he tried to pass his conviction on to his lover. “We just have to keep looking until we find it.” “Lies, Kanath,” Rhicer responded. “Every explanation we could give would be a lie. How long can we do that, before it starts eating at us, before we start resenting each other for having to tell lies? Already, I hate the fact that we cannot be together except in these stolen moments. We will never know the joy of falling asleep in each other's arms, of waking up together in the morning. We will never be able to dance with each other at weddings, never be able to hold each other at funerals. We will be denied every aspect of a normal life. I love you, more than anything, and it makes me so angry that we cannot have the life we deserve.” Rynes had not known what was going to come out of his mouth until he had spoken the words, but the moment they left his mouth, he knew they were right. “So go somewhere else, somewhere you can have that life.” “Where?” Rhicer queried. “Where would we have any chance of being accepted for who we are? Even here, where we are known, we would be outcast the moment the truth 94
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna came to light. How can we expect to be accepted as strangers somewhere else?” “You say you love Kanath more than anything else,” Rynes reminded him. “If that is true, what need have you for a society, any society, that would refuse you the right to love each other? Find some place remote enough where there will be none to question you and you can celebrate your love the way it deserves.” “Do you truly believe that?” Kanath asked curiously. “That our love deserves to be celebrated?” Rynes considered the question, for a few scant weeks ago, he would have condemned them along with everyone else. The time he had spent with each man individually and the two occasions he had seen them together privately had changed that opinion drastically. They belonged together. “Yes, I believe it,” he replied. “I also know that not everyone will be as willing to see what I see between you. They will see only two men rather than the obvious, amazing depth of your feelings for each other. It's not a chance you can afford to take.” “But leaving?” Rhicer challenged. “Abandoning everything we have ever known and striking out on our own? That, too, is taking quite a chance.” “It is,” Rynes agreed, “but I do not see how you will keep this a secret for long here at court. Already, your king is asking questions you cannot answer. For the moment, he is only asking me those questions, and I will protect your secret as long as I can, but a time may well come when he begins to speak to others besides me, others who will not have my sensitivity. And when that happens, then you will be lucky if you are simply forced to leave. At least this way, you have time to think, to plan, to gather what you need, 95
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna and to leave on your own terms instead of being cast out with nothing but the clothes on your backs. I do not want you to go. I will miss you terribly, but I don't see, in the long run, what other choice you have.” “You make some valid points,” Kanath admitted slowly, “but where would we go? ’Tis summer now, but already the days grow shorter. We would need shelter, more than just our tent from the war, and supplies, if we have any hope of surviving the winter. We can hunt for meat, but that does not supply us with vegetables and the like.” “I don't have all the answers,” Rynes said regretfully, “but I'll repeat what I said before. Better to do this of your own accord and have time to plan for these problems than to find yourselves thrust into the situation with nothing.” “We have gold,” Rhicer reminded Kanath. “We have been well paid for our service over the years and I have used little of it. We can use that to buy supplies if we find a place near enough to a town that we could travel there on occasion. And next summer, we could farm a piece of land ourselves. It has been years, but I do remember some of what I learned as a child, enough to keep us in beans and carrots anyway.” “So you think we should do this?” the younger man asked. “I don't want to,” Rhicer admitted, “but Rynes is right. It's do it now, on our terms, or later, on others'.” The look of desolation on his friends' faces at the thought of leaving had torn at Rynes' heart and he had cursed himself silently for making the suggestion, but he did not know what else he could have told them.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna They spent the next month making plans. On the pretense of checking on the activities of raiders and bandits, Kanath had ridden out for a weeklong patrol, using the time to search for a place he and Rhicer could call home. During that time, Rhicer began collecting everything he thought they would need to make it on their own. They had much already, from their soldiers' kits: pots and pans, blankets and bedding. They would not be able to take anything large, furniture and the like, because they had no way of transporting it. They would have to slip away if they expected to make good their escape, which meant taking only what they could carry in their saddlebags. Kanath returned at the end of the week with good news for Lord Emyl and good news for Rhicer. He had seen no sign of the raiders and bandits that had often plagued the outlying areas and he had found an abandoned hut, only one tiny room, but solid and snug. It would get them through the winter, at least, and they could add to it later if they needed more space. He had been careful not to give any detail about the surrounding area when Rynes was nearby, not wanting to put him in the position of having to lie later about where they had gone. He would know they had gone, but not where. It had no furniture, but they could use their bedrolls until they had time to fashion a bed, could sit on the floor until they could make table and chairs. It would be a simple life, but it would allow them to be together. Rynes had seen the longing in their eyes as they talked, imagining a life that would no longer require such secrecy. They did not leave immediately, savoring what little time they had left with the friends they would be leaving behind. The king had not given up on his idea of Rhicer marrying, however, continuing to bring up the subject each time he found Rhicer alone. Rhicer's irritation had grown, and
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna Kanath's with it. The breaking point had come, though, the day Nische cornered Kanath and dropped hints to him about likely ladies. It seemed the court was no longer a safe place for any bachelor, much less two who wanted nothing but to be together. And so, preparations complete, Rynes had sent them on their way, hand raised in silent farewell as they rode out of sight. Their disappearance had been noticed immediately, of course. Their rooms were empty of everything personal, their horses gone. The king had been dumbstruck, demanding answers left and right, of how and why they had chosen to leave. Rynes had bided his time, wanting to give his friends a chance to get far enough away that pursuit would be pointless, but eventually he cornered the king and told him part of the truth. “You would not leave Rhicer alone, would not let him live his life as he chose,” Rynes had declared angrily. “You tried repeatedly to make him marry a woman he does not love when he obviously had no desire to marry at all. You set me to spy on him like a common criminal, which he found out, being the intelligent, observant man he is. And if that were not enough, your lady started in on Kanath. They no longer felt welcome here, and you have no one but yourself to blame. Why could you not just leave them in peace?” “But to leave?” the monarch had questioned. “Why did they not simply tell me to mind my own business? Kanath, I can understand, but Rhicer and I have been friends since the war began. Surely he knew that I would not force him.” “He knew no such thing,” Rynes retorted. “He told you he did not want to marry, told you he was happy as he was, but you did not believe him. Maybe he was secretive about some things, but that was his choice, and you made it so that he
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna felt unable to come to you anyway. It doesn't matter now. They're gone.” The king had not been happy with Rynes' answers, but he had no choice but to accept them. By that time, there was no trail left for even the best tracker to follow. Stroking Taen's feathers again, Rynes carried her toward the mews, the rosebud still in his hand. “Is that Kanath's falcon?” The king's voice broke into Rynes' thoughts and he looked up. There was no point in denying it since Emyl himself had presented Kanath with the bird years ago. “It is,” he confirmed. “Did she bring news?” Lord Emyl asked eagerly. “Only that they are safe,” Rynes replied, “but that is all I expected to hear from them.” “They aren't coming back, are they?” the king asked sadly, the loss finally settling in. “No, they're not,” Rynes agreed. “There's no place here for them.” He paused for a moment, wondering how much it was safe to say now that he knew his friends were settled. “No place for them in their home?” Emyl asked sharply. “No,” Rynes insisted. “You made sure of that, with your insistence that they marry. And if you are not careful, you will drive others away as well. Your heart is in the right place, but your meddling has gone too far. Are you really so blind that you couldn’t see what was right in front of you?”
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna He would have said more, would almost certainly have told the king exactly what he thought of the sovereign's actions in driving away his best friends, but the clattering of hooves drew their attention, saving Rynes from what would certainly have been a mistake. He took a deep breath and resolved to accept the decision that Rhicer and Kanath had made. He had known it was the right one when he sent them on their way. Perhaps the day would come when he could make Emyl understand, could convince him not to condemn them for their choice, but that would have to wait until later. Lifting his eyes, he turned to greet whomever had arrived. He did not know the knight who swung from his horse, calling a greeting and asking if there was a roof to be found for a wandering swordsman looking for work, but he felt an immediate kinship with the dark-haired man. He could not put his finger on any particular trait, any gesture or expression that caught his attention, but he felt an incredible pull, an affinity he had not felt for anyone except his two closest friends, now gone. His gaze traveled the length of the man, head to toe and back again, until their eyes locked. Intelligence and a powerful self-awareness stared back at him from the hazel depths. He realized with momentary surprise that he should not have been able to make out the color with the distance between them, but he knew beyond doubt that the newcomer, Cerelt as he introduced himself to the king, had hazel eyes, that realization only increasing the inexplicable conviction that this man would come to mean far more to him than a simple comrade-in-arms. Rynes held back, letting the king make that decision as was his right. That was not what kept him silent, though. His silence had a much more profound cause. His eyes fell to the rosebud in his hand, which had come to represent so much to his two friends. Looking back up, he studied the coat of arms on the new arrival's shield, his 100
A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna breath catching in his throat as he took in the full implication of his thoughts. He had not been mistaken. The rose in his hand had its echo on the other man's insignia.
SILENCE greeted the end of the tale, the audience so entranced by the story that they did not even react to its conclusion for several long seconds. Around the court, many of the ladies wept openly for the star-crossed lovers, and even a few of the gentlemen wiped surreptitiously at their eyes. In the back of the room, near the fireplace, two old men sat side by side, small smiles on their faces as their gazes met. “’Tis not exactly the way I remember it happening,” the older one commented, his hand stretching out to close around the other man’s gnarled fingers. “Perhaps not,” the younger one agreed, “but it makes a fine tale nonetheless.” They fell silent again, their eyes drifting to an old shield, one among many decorating the walls of the keep, its rose insignia faded almost beyond recognition with the passing of time.
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A Rose Among the Ruins Ariel Tachna
ARIEL TACHNA lives in southwestern Ohio with her husband, her daughter and son, and their cat. A native of the region, she has nonetheless lived all over the world, having fallen in love with both France, where she found her career and her husband, and India, where she dreams of retiring some day. She started writing when she was twelve and hasn’t looked back since. A connoisseur of wine and horses, she’s as comfortable on a farm as she is in the big cities of the world. Visit Ariel’s website at http://www.arieltachna.com/. Follow Ariel’s blog at http://arieltachna.livejournal.com/. Other titles from Ariel…
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Rose Among the Ruins ©Copyright Ariel Tachna, 2009 Published by Dreamspinner Press 4760 Preston Road Suite 244-149 Frisco, TX 75034 http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/ This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the authors’ imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental. Cover Design by Catt Ford This book is licensed to the original purchaser only. Duplication or distribution via any means is illegal and a violation of International Copyright Law, subject to criminal prosecution and upon conviction, fines and/or imprisonment. This eBook cannot be legally loaned or given to others. No part of this eBook can be shared or reproduced without the express permission of the publisher. To request permission and all other inquiries, contact Dreamspinner Press at: 4760 Preston Road, Suite 244-149, Frisco, TX 75034 http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/ Released in the United States of America August, 2009 eBook Edition eBook ISBN: 978-1-61581-052-9
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