Wild and Unruly

Amanda McIntyre

WILD & UNRULY BY AMANDA McINTYRE Venus Press LLC

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The scanning, uploading and distribution of this book via the Internet or via any other means without the permission of the publisher is illegal, and punishable by law. Please purchase only authorized electronic editions, and do not participate in or encourage the electronic piracy of copyrighted materials. Your support of the author’s rights is appreciated. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, places, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. WILD & UNRULY Copyright © 2006 by Amanda McIntyre ISBN: 1-59836Cover Art © 2006 by Sable Grey All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any form without permission, except as provided by the U.S. Copyright Law. Printed and bound in the United States of America. For information, you can find us on the web at www.VenusPress.com PO Box 584 Hillsborough NC 27278

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Dedication:

Inspired by the song "Cowboy Take Me Away"~ For the bit of wild & unruly in each if us.

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Chapter One

"Hey, Miss Lillian has a different color sweater on today, she must be crusin' for a man. That right, Miss Lillian? The gangly teen, his clothes perfectly matched though hanging badly on his form, strutted up to the desk, his buddies close behind. "You lookin' for someone, then I'm your man, Miss Lillian, you could teach me what you know." Lillian's gaze snapped towards him with surprise at his blatant proposal. The young man, at most in his early twenties, offered her a cocky smile that bordered somewhere between challenge and a seasoned male. He held her gaze with hooded lids, offering her a few silent kisses as he passed by to go to the computer lab. She heard the muffled laughter of his friends in his wake. She'd gotten used to the whispers, and more recently the bold statements made by adolescent boys who spent their days at the library glued to the computer screen surfing the Internet. Granted, it was perhaps unusual to see a younger woman presiding over the library. The last librarian retired at the age of eighty. Lillian raised a brow of indifference toward the boy. She realized that much of their behavior was immaturity. They were simply restless young men with no more to do with their lives than taunt others. Yet another part of her, one she kept hidden from public view wanted to scream that she wasn't the pathetic, woe-be-gone, clueless spinster they pegged her for. No, in fact, Lillian was quite the opposite. She was careful not to let the public see her private persona, the one that poured over the books of the old west. The stories inside them made her heart come alive, spawning all sorts of fantasies about the bawdy women who worked and ran the bordellos and saloons, playing host to nightly liaisons with dangerous renegades and outlaws. She found it amusing how the very folk who shunned their lifestyle, also partook of it, either by visit, or by benefit of the money they earned. 5

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Lillian shivered, drawing her sweater tight. It was almost closing time. The former librarian hobbled up to the desk and Lillian smiled. She was a sweet woman, hardly an irritable bone in her body. "Two weeks, Miss Claussen." Lil adjusted her narrow reading glasses and peered up at the old woman who was checking out the worn Kathleen Woodiwiss novel for the fourth time. The joy of anticipation shone on the woman's wrinkled face and her silvery hair, no doubt kept rich in color, shone in lamplight. There was a brief moment when Lilly saw herself some forty years down the road. "Thank you dear, I just love this one," her rickety voice trembled as she clutched the book to her crocheted sweater. Lillian glanced down noting the resemblence in color to her own sweater. "You know, you remind me of my younger self. Such a good girl, and so organized. I know our precious books are in the best of hands." The woman smiled and though Lillian knew she meant well, it was not her wish to grow old alone, taking comfort only in the books surrounding her. Still, with the way her life had been going lately— Lillian pushed back a brief flutter of nausea in her throat and smiled at the woman. I am not a goody two-shoes. I want to be unruly, I want to take risks, have crazy adventures. Lillian sighed. Yes, she had a million fantasies, some with adventure, some tantalizingly risqué, while others had her finding the man of her dreams. She watched the old woman teeter down the stairs, her book bag crossing over from her shoulder to her hip. Burt, the library's janitor, tipped his red ball cap as he held the door open for the old woman in a chivalrous gesture. He looked to be a wise man, perhaps even a genius with his bushy white hair and his full white eyebrows perched over twinkling blue eyes. He'd been there as long as Lillian could remember, working quietly, always polite to everyone. "Thank you, Bart." She heard Miss Clausen say to him. "You have a pleasant evening, Miss Clausen, mind yourself now." Her tinkling laughter followed her out the door. Nope, they just didn't make guys like Burt anymore. 6

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Lillian smiled as she glanced at the stack of books waiting to be registered. One in particular, caught her eye. "The Story of Lucky Lil." Lillian felt as though a glass of cold water had been poured over her head. Was this some kind of joke? She glanced nervously around the library to see if the teens had planted the book and were now watching her surprise. The only people left, besides her and Bart, and presumably the teens still at the computers, was a couple in the newspaper section. A well-dressed woman and a man, dressed impeccably in an Armani suit were each preoccupied with separate papers. Lillian eyed the book again, and her fingers itched with curiosity to slip it from the stack to see what it contained. Lucky Lil? Maybe she was a woman spy, like Tokyo Rose, or some other now famous woman in history that was unafraid to set a course for her dreams. She straightened her shoulders and reached for the short stack of books, methodically slipping a checkout tab inside the front cover. Though she tried to ignore it, her heart beat faster as she neared the place where the book lay. As she closed her fingers over its binding, the deep bong of the grandfather clock reverberated in the front hall signaling the five o'clock hour. Closing time. “Found this on the floor out front.” Startled, she looked at the small box Burt laid in front of her. The delicate package wrapped in shiny gold paper was tied with a deep purple chiffon ribbon. It sparkled in the intense light of her bankers lamp. “Who do you suppose would leave something so beautiful in a library?” She touched the exquisite box, carefully turning it in her hands, staring at its splendid covering. She’d never received anything like it. “It looks like some type of jewelry case, Burt. It might be worth a lot. Perhaps, I should call the police.” Her gaze was drawn to a subtle embossed design on the paper— similar to an old-fashioned four-leaf clover. “We could just place it in the safe for tonight. No one would know about it, ’cept you and me. ‘Sides, haven’t you been talking about some date tonight?” His wicked grin made her conscience burn with guilt. She’d been talking all week about her date, though little did any one know her “date” consisted of renting her favorite western movie and Chinese take-out on the way home. 7

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“That’s right, Burt. I can call them tomorrow.” Lillian stared at the package, mesmerized by how warm it felt to her touch. “Well then, my work here is done. See you on Monday.” Lillian's fingertips burned with a sensation that began to warm her blood. “Lillian? Lillian?” Blinking, Lillian looked up and slammed into Burt’s concerned gaze. Certain she was blushing; she held her palm to her cheek. “You feel alright? You look a might flushed.” She dropped the box, trying to ignore the effervescent rush of tingles coursing to parts of her body untouched by another in years. “I’m fine Burt. I probably just need to get out in the fresh air.” Lillian smiled hoping her façade convinced Burt. Inside she quivered with the anticipation of something she could not pinpoint. One thing she knew, that box was not going in the libraries safe. Not tonight. She’d take it home where she knew it would be safe and maybe she could take a better look at its markings to determine what jeweler it came from. He nodded with a short clip to his hat. “Enjoy yourself Lillian. You deserve a good evening.” With that, he disappeared into the shadows of the back hallway. Aware she’d not consulted Burt about taking it home over the weekend she catapulted from her chair in hopes of stopping him. Her shoe caught a slip of paper on the floor causing her feet to swoop out from under her. She caught her elbows on the edge of the desk embarrassed at her klutziness. "Hey. Lucky Lil, looking fine. Is that your after hours look?" Startled, Lillian turned to see the tattooed arm of one of the stragglers. She followed his gaze to where her skirt rode high on her hip. "We're closed." Her voice was emphatic as she tugged her skirt into place. “You should leave now.” "Chill mama, no need to get hostile." He backed away, stumbling over his feet as he bumped into Burt’s mop. "You boys head on home. Library's closed for the day." "Thanks, Burt." Glad that Burt had the penchant for being at the right time when she needed; Lillian pulled herself upright and straightened her clothes. She glanced up as he dipped his rag mop into the water with a splash. “Forgot my bucket in the front hall, guess I’m glad I had to come back and get it.” 8

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“Me too. Thanks Burt.” "Problem with men these days is that they've forgotten how to treat a lady." He glanced at her, and then returned his focus to his bucket. "Nope, there are no white knights or cowboys to come to the rescue and ride off into the sunset with anymore." The utter wishful tone in her voice surprised even her. She gave Burt a shy grin. "Don't give up, Lilly. There may yet be a few good ones left out there." "Maybe Burt, but I think they stopped making them after you." She smiled with affection in her heart for the old man. Checking her watch, she realized that she would need to hurry if she was going to grab a copy of Tombstone on her way home. She paused with her hand on the green banker's desk lamp and glanced at the ornate box. Her eye caught the corner of the book about the bordello madam, Lucky Lil. Grabbing them both, she decided that at least her evening would not be quite so boring if she could research the box online. Lillian tucked the book and box in her tote, switched off the light, and headed for the door. “Night, Burt.” She sidestepped his work as she headed to the front door. "Sweet dreams, Lillian," Burt whispered.

*** Lillian plopped her purse atop the antique dry sink she used as a catch-all by her apartments front door. She'd managed to salvage it from an old furniture store that was being torn down to make room for a new set of movie theatres. It was her love of old things that made her appreciate history as much as she did. "Hey, Wyatt." She chucked the three-legged cat under its chin. "Keeping an eye on things around here today?" She grabbed the Tender Vittles pouch offering it to the finicky cat, which sniffed her palm and meowed in protest. "Fine. You can just wait until after I change." She arched her brow and headed toward the bedroom. "I'll be watching your favorite movie tonight, by the way, should you care to join me" She chuckled as she peeled off her periwinkle cardigan and hung it in her closet next to the other items of her color-coordinated clothing system. Her sister called the system anal--Lillian preferred the word organized. It cut decision making in half by having a complete set of mix and match attire. Classic clothing, sensible--that way she could present a professional, responsible, and self-stated look to the world. 9

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A sigh of contentment escaped her lips as she sat on the edge of her bed covered with its red satin comforter. She’d allowed herself the purchase of the flamboyant coverlet in a fit of whimsy, but made sure that the clerk concealed it in an opaque bag so others wouldn’t see. She pushed off her sensible black leather flats and pushed the plain gray wool skirt down over her hips. Catching her image in the dresser’s mirror she straightened as she snapped a clothespin to the skirt on the hanger. Turning side to side, she had to admit that there was more to her than what most people saw. If they only knew. She slid off her half-slip and padded through the house in her leopard print thong and bra from Intimate Whispers. Like her cat, curiosity pulled at her to scrounge through her purse to find the lovely, mysterious box, convincing herself that it was its potential historic value and not the physical sensations she’d experienced that captured her attention. There was no mistaking its beauty. Intrigued by its detail, she turned it over and over in her hands as she sauntered back to her bedroom. It felt right in her hands, like it belonged. Already, a pleasing warmth spread through her and purely out of habit, she flipped on her stereo already set with her favorite Garth Brooks tunes. A shiver skated through her body as the mellow voice of Garth Brooks crooned his musical story of finding long lost love. She grabbed one of many decorative black and red lace pillows she kept piled at the head of her bed, plumped it with one hand, and dropped it atop the others. In need of better light, she reached over and pulled the delicate black tassel of her bedside lamp, given to her by her grandmother. Its delicate rose-colored globe softened the afternoon shadows in the room. Lillian stretched out across the bed, undoing the barrette holding her hair hostage. She shook her hair free, closing her eyes with another sigh of relief. The box against her palm was warm, like a hot cup of tea, its energy flowed from its very fibers. Lillian gave a quiet chuckle to her over-active imagination. She held the box up to the light, searching for some mark of its origin, a copyright date, or shop name. Chewing nervously at the corner of her lip, she picked at the beautiful bow and watched it slide effortlessly off the box, with but the slightest tug of her hand. 10

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Her labored breathing echoed in the stillness of the room as she carefully peeled away the paper, keeping it as intact as possible. Inside was a black velvet box and a shiver ran across her skin as she gazed upon its rich beauty. With a hard swallow, she opened the box and her eyes opened wide at what was nestled inside. She held up the whisper thin gold chain, blatantly staring at the ruby red jewel dangling at the other end. It was exquisite and no doubt an amazing reproduction. How could anyone be so careless as to leave it behind? She held it at eye-level, by its delicate gold chain, enthralled at how the tiny gemstone swayed from left to right, giving off sparks of red in the waning rays of the sun. She’d never possessed anything quite so magnificent in her mundane life. Lillian sat up, curling her legs beneath her and carefully unclasped the necklace, placing it around her neck. Licking her lips from dryness, she pushed to her knees so as to see herself in the dresser mirror, checking the effect of it as it lay against her pale skin. Touching it with great reverence and a little awe-struck, she smiled at her reflection. It looked amazingly beautiful against her flesh--luxurious and decadent, in a way that sent a thrill through her. Warmth pervaded her body as she lay back. She spread her arms across the barrage of pillows and struck a provocative pose, giving her reflection an equally provocative grin. If only there was a man who could appreciate her for whom she was and not hold stereotyped opinions about her profession. Who said that librarians can’t be sexy? Who said librarians were stuffy and had no fantasy life? She had plenty of both and someday the right man would come along and— She yawned, comforted by the warmth spreading through her. Maybe she’d take a quick nap before feeding Wyatt. Lulled by the soothing country tunes and the gentle whir of the ceiling fan, Lillian drifted off to sleep.

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Chapter Two

A thunderous pounding on the bedroom door startled her from deep sleep. Lillian sat up straight on the bed, her head still groggy from heavy slumber. Through hooded lids, she noted the last dredges of sunlight as it poured through the gauzy white curtains. Slow and easy, the wind lifted them as though waving at her. Cool, fresh air, the scent of earth and prairie grass, skimmed across Lillian's flesh, creating more confusion in her mind. When did I open the windows? "Lil! Dammit, are you in there?" The pounding resumed with the fierce command of someone decidedly irate. "I need to talk to you. It's important." Lillian blinked as her gaze fought with her senses to recall when she'd put up curtains. My room? She scanned the lush interior of the dimly lit room. Though the coverlet and pillows resembled her bed, little else did. Against the opposite wall sat a great oval shaped mirror, set in an exquisitely scrolled framework. A matching mahogany vanity laden with colored perfume bottles and soft pastel ribbons sat beneath it. Perched at its base was a beautiful white tufted chair with an ornate curved brass back. Rosecolored kerosene lamps flickered softly on the wall on either side of the regal vanity. It had to have been over one hundred years old. Where had it come from? Her walls, once an ordinary white, were now a rich, dark olive wallpaper with same color raised floral design. Was she dreaming this? "Lil? You open this door right now, or I'm going to have to kick it down." That voice on the other side of the door did not sound like a dream. She searched, half-awake for something to cover herself with. At the end of the bed lay a gorgeous sheer purple robe. Not having much else to choose from before the man followed through 12

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with his threat, she slipped it over her arms, mildly stunned to discover that it barely covered her. She glanced down realizing with muted brain cells that it had the opposite effect than what she'd been going for. It merely enhanced the now very bold leopard print of her underwear. "One...two…" The man certainly sounded very angry and before she could resolve one dilemma, she would have to deal with him directly. As she struggled off the bed, her mind, hazy with sleep, fought to remember if she’d paid her landlord what she owed in rent. "I'm coming, hold onto your horses." She slid off the bed, hugging the transparent robe as best as she could to her body. Sure, she would awaken soon from this dream; she grabbed the brass lock and twisted it, gently opening the door a miniscule crack. Her heart stayed in her throat. Unless her landlord had made an instantaneous and decidedly better change in both stature and clothing, she had no idea who this hunk was. On the other side of the door stood a giant of a man with his back to her. He was dressed, from what she could tell in a long trench coat, the kind you might see in an old western. Though worn and more filthy than she thought attractive. She eased the door open for a better peek and he whirled on his heel, pinning her with a stern look. "What the Sam hill is “hold on to my horses” supposed to--" His words clipped short as his gaze dropped to where her hands clutched the robe over her breasts. Obviously the new push-up bra was proudly doing its job of producing a deep cleavage. Praise be to Intimate Whispers online catalog. She'd never seen a man swallow that hard before, not in her presence anyway. "Can I help you?" It seemed like the most reasonable question at the moment. "Lil—uh—Lilly—Miss Lilly.” He shook his head as though assembling his tongue back to its proper function. “You know darn well I don't fraternize with the ladies here." He planted his hands on his lean hips and set his jaw firm as he peered at her with eyes sparkling dark as a cool desert night. It was then that she noticed his dusty black cowboy hat. "You're dressed like a--" The words were clearly in her mind, but having difficulty getting past her lips. 13

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He raked his teeth over his lower lip, sweat forming on the upper. He pushed his hat off his forehead. "The sheriff, right. You feelin' okay?" He reached back and scratched his neck, giving her a look that made her question her own sanity. As if she needed any more help. Tongue-tied by his formidable presence and the way he looked at her like a man eyeballs a steak, she drew the robe closer, realizing his gaze had dropped below her eye level once again. "Er--to what do I owe the pleasure of this call--Sheriff…" She drew out the title, her eyes frantically searching his person for a badge--at the very least a nametag. Good God, Burt had turned her in for taking the box, and now they were coming after her. Could this day get any worse? He leaned forward as if waiting, his dark brow arching as he came within a few inches of her face. His gaze penetrated hers. "Sloan. Sheriff Jake Sloan?" Lillian smiled as she raked a hand through her hair, realizing that she must look a mess. Still, by virtue of how this man was trying not to drool; perhaps the unkempt look was something she might decide to try. "Right--Sheriff Sloan.” Is that what they call County detectives now? Lillian searched her mind trying to make sense of what was going on. He ignored her apparent lapse in memory, however, that was the only thing he seemed to ignore. The woman in her sensed he was definitely checking out everything else about her. The idea caused her body to warm and that in turn, created a whole new set of fantasies. "The girls are shopping downtown during the daytime hours again, Lil." He shifted his weight to his other leg, not--she happened to note--allowing his attention to wander from her cleavage. Heat, powerful and bold, snaked through her, causing her blood to warm. "How do you feel about quiet women, Sheriff Sloan?" She pushed the door open wide, leaning her hand against its frame. Her fingers itched to feel the soft tufts of dark ringlets jutting out from beneath his hat. Lillian loved the surge of boldness swelling inside her—the exhilaration of freedom. She’d never been so brazen in all her life—she kind of liked it. 14

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The intense heat of his gaze seared her, and then he choked, flinging the back of his hand over his mouth, his coughing spell causing him to turn away. Rats. Lillian rushed to his side, forgetting the robe, forgetting this was a strange man, forgetting that she stood in the hall of her apartment building. When had they done the wallpaper in embossed scarlet red flowers? "Good God in heaven woman." He glanced sideways scanning her from chin to foot. "You're going to be the death of me." "But I--I haven't touched you." She stepped back, challenging him with her hands on her hips. "Would you please cover yourself?" He reached out, snagging the edge of the flimsy robe. "I beg your pardon." She attempted to snatch the thin robe from his hands, but he held tight, his assessment of her underclothing creating emotions she'd never had to skitter up her spine—not to mention tickle her in other places. "Is that one of them fancy French numbers?" He whispered the words as his gaze roved painstakingly slow over her body. If she weren't a proper lady, his hungry look would have her sizzling in her skin. His heated gaze took away her breath. She was a proper lady, wasn't she? Lillian swallowed. "Sheriff, you said something about my girls shopping? Is that a crime?" Not that she had a clue what he was talking about. Her head was a mess with whether this was a dream and if she would awaken before she had the chance to know him the way her body yearned to. Truth of the matter was, for the first time that Lil could remember, she wanted to be improper, very improper, and not with just anyone, with this man. He squared his massive shoulders, dropped his hand and stepped away from her like she had a virus. "Lil, we had an agreement. Late afternoon, between five and six, that’s when your women are allowed to shop for your--" Lil saw his Adams apple bobble in this throat as he swallowed. "You know…your womanly possessions." His gaze snapped to hers tilting her world on its axis. Those cool, dark eyes filled with determination held hers in an all-business-and-no-fun-like gaze. Hardly the effect he'd made her feel a few short moments ago. 15

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"You talk to those gals,” he pointed a finger at her nose, “and remind 'em of our little agreement. That way the townsfolk get what they want and you all get what you want." He ripped the hat from his head, swiping his hand through a wave of thick black hair. "Damn, it’s hot in here, ain’t it?” It was a nervous gesture that for some reason gave Lillian a great deal of pleasure. Usually it was her role to play the bumbling pack of nerves around men, certainly not the other way around. She smiled, touching the gem at the base of her throat. A surge of confidence welled inside her, sensuality pumped in her blood. "And what is it you want, Sheriff?" The provocative tone in her own voice both surprised and empowered her. She stepped forward, spreading her robe on purpose to offer him a full view of what she offered. With the deliberation of a patient lover, she smoothed her palm over his shoulder, squeezing the well-defined strength of the muscle beneath the duster coat. Thoughts of where else he might be as firm flooded her mind, dampening her thong. Lillian took her time as she circled behind him, trailing her fingers lazily over the back of his broad shoulders. She’d always held inside a fantasy of a man with large shoulders, brimming with masculinity and strength, wanting to be held in his capable arms, soothed by his velvet touch. Taking in his scent—rugged outdoors mingled seductively with leather, she arched a brow as she came around to face him. Playfully, she rested her arm on his shoulder, allowing him full view of the magic of her push-up lingerie. She curled her finger around a ringlet of his ebony hair, jutting out just below his ear. His shoulder flinched briefly as he fought for control. Lillian smiled, appreciating the power she seemed to have over him. Where was this going? Would it end when she woke up? She ran her fingertip along his chiseled jaw, over his firm, kissable lower lip. "Lillian." His tone offered a stern warning. The proper use of her name broke her from her reverie and she stepped back, aware and suddenly self-conscience again at the generous amount of naked flesh open for public display. Her confidence broken, she would go along with the ruse just to get rid of him, so she could figure out what was happening to her. Her face burned with embarrassment. "I'll talk…to the girls, Sheriff Sloan." She moistened her lips and glanced at the floor unsure why she should feel so unworthy around this man. He was after all a 16

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stranger, although in his eyes, she thought she’d seen someone else—someone desirable and beautiful. It wouldn’t be the first time she’d been mistaken. Odds were it wouldn’t be her last. His finger lifted her chin to his gaze. "It's Jake. We're friends, Lil. We've known each other a while now. This one incident isn't going to change that. It’s just we have to keep certain—rules, you know." His gaze, soft and warm, made her feel liquid all over—again. Lillian wanted to kiss him in the worse way, wondering if that would count as a second incident. Though she’d never met him, she felt like she’d known him a lifetime. Maybe he’d ask for her number. Her heart thudded against her chest. "Lil?" "Uh huh?" She held his gaze, mostly--letting it slip briefly to the serious line of his mouth and the lips that looked so inviting. She really wanted to know those lips better. "Just promise me you'll talk to the girls." Lillian nodded, her gaze bobbing from his eyes to his mouth, noting with mild curiosity the small scar on his lip, wondering how it got there. "Soon." He held her chin propped toward his face. Are his lips getting closer? "Lil?" His voice hovered near, so close that his breath--warm and masculine-fanned her cheek. "Yes?" she whispered as she watched his mouth draw near. "I can't touch you." Desire strangled his voice. "You already are, Sheriff." "Oh no, not at all the way I’d like to. It wouldn't be proper. I'm the law, you know and I--um, can't fraternize with you, Lil." His cheek, course with a shadowed beard, barely touched her check. She heard his soft sigh. Since when had making love become illegal? "I won't let you break the law, Sheriff Sloan." She closed her eyes, blurting the first thing that came to her mind, euphoric that a man could want her so bad that he would sigh over her. Lillian tipped her head back to accommodate the hope that his mouth would take advantage of the welcome. 17

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Oh lord, let him kiss me. Just do it— "It's Jake. I want to hear you say it, Lil," he whispered, his breath warm against her face. Touching only her chin, he backed her against the wall, pressing his fully clothed body against hers--wrapped in next to nothing. His fingers, the only flesh on flesh, stay poised as he gazed hard and long into her eyes. Her breasts tightened as his leather coat brushed over them, teasing her senses. She was about to burst into flame. "Say it for me. Say my name, Lil. Let me hear it from--" his gaze lowered, lingering on her mouth, leisurely taking his time as he returned her gaze, "those lips." Desire closed in stifling her ability to breathe. Law or not--no man had ever made her feel this wicked. "Jake." His name escaped in a throaty whisper as she forced her gaze to his. His eyes pinned her in a haze of seduction. He smiled, slow and even, satisfaction sparkled in his eyes. She gasped, aware she teetered on the edge of an orgasm. "I'm just a librarian, you know." The words snuck out before she could stop them. Fine, now he knew. She wanted him to know the truth up front. Lillian noticed the brief, but humorous hesitation flit across his face. The hunky cowboy stepped back, nodding as if he completely understood. He gave her a sexy grin. "Sure you are. Listen, here you can be whatever you'd like to be, but keep your girls in line and there won’t be any trouble." He tapped his finger playfully on the tip of her nose and stamped his Stetson on his head. "Please. Good day, Miss Lilly." With one last lingering look, he turned with a heavy swirl of his well-worn duster and headed down the stairs. Lillian collapsed against the wall akin to the term, ‘rode hard and put up wet’.

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Chapter Three

The dull thump of Jake's boots echoed in the quiet brothel as he strode across the great red Chinese rug on the main level. It was reportedly sent to the Sweet Magnolia by a wealthy and well-traveled client. Among other such furnishings that embellished the town’s only bordello, the Magnolia was well known in the region for its regal furnishings, smooth whiskey, and beautiful women. He kept his gaze averted from the pictures of the scantily clad women that adorned the walls on his way out—in particular the one of the bordello’s famous madam, “Lucky Lil.” Already he’d gotten closer to Lil than he should—both as a lawman and an upstanding member of the town’s only congregational church. That his father was the church’s minister was notwithstanding to Jake’s responsibilities. He knew the house kept some of the ruly behavior of the men in town at bay and for that he supposed he should be grateful. But grateful had its levels, and lately, the continual sight of Lil brought his gratitude to a rise. There were times in his life that Jake wished he wasn't the town's sole form of the legal system, especially when it came to Lucky Lil. He never called her that though— didn't like the connotation it gave her. He guessed maybe in a strange way that she was different than the rest of the bordello women. The idea, or so the rumor was, that she only entertained a select group of men. But he'd never talked to anyone directly who'd ever been with her. Thank God. The thought alone made him ache in places he knew ought not to be affected by a woman of Lilly's reputation. He was, after all, Deadwater Gulch's pride and joy, the epitome of sainthood as his preacher father was pleased to tout. He felt nothing like a saint around Lilly. She'd only recently taken over as head madam, after the former one had up and married a rich hat salesman and moved to New York, but already Lil had created enough 19

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ruckuses that he’d been forced to make frequent visits to the bordello at the edge of town to reprimand the women for one thing or another.

*** "It would be better to pluck out your eye than to associate with such heathen promiscuity." Jake lowered his gaze from the stern face of his preacher father. Sometimes, he wondered just how he'd managed to be born. His father, it seemed had a personal mission to eradicate the world from the sin of sex. The use of it for procreation was acceptable, or so Jake surmised. But for anything else, particularly pleasure, it was a sin, even in marriage. There was a part of him that felt sorry for his mother-God rest her soul. He glanced up, catching only his father's furrowed brow and accusing glare. Though he'd not been around much himself he'd been in the company of one or two beautiful ladies in his lifetime. But under the guarded eye of his father, the man the townspeople called, "Preacher." Sure as a boy he'd snuck out with his friends to peek through the clapboard walls of the bordello on the outskirts of town. They'd gotten an eye-opening education all right, but Jake remembered having lots of questions. None that he would dream of asking his strict father. "Fire and brimstone. That's what you'll face. Hellfire and damnation for the very lustful thoughts in your brain." Maybe that’s what killed his mother? Jakes thoughts skipped back to his fourteenth birthday. His mother lay pale and frail looking propped up against the pillows of her single bed. A quilt she'd had for years, worn thin with age, covered her petite form. She smiled, though weak, and touched Jake's face with her cool fingers. Death lingered in the room waiting. Jake could feel it. The doc couldn’t tell them why she was sick, only that he'd done all he could do. To Jake’s way of seeing things it was his father and his overly rigid attitude that was her illness. Even up to that day, his father prayed over her, absolving her of her sins, so she would be pure enough to meet her Maker. Jake wondered how a man like his father purified himself. "You're a good boy, Jacob. You take those qualities and use them to help people."

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His mother clutched his hand as another coughing spell racked her frail body. He wanted to cut out his hypocritical tongue. Where was the man who proclaimed judgment on others, but would not take responsibility for the care of his family? "Be kind and try not to judge others too harshly until you've been where they are." She motioned him close, giving him a weak, but loving hug. In the next moment, she lay lifeless in his arms. Jake remembered laying her down, holding her hand and staring at her for what seemed an eternity. It was not until later that he cried. Jake found his father alone in his study, a place profoundly forbidden to anyone else. He was deeply engrossed in reading the good word, completely oblivious his wife lay dead in an upstairs room. Had it not been for the influence of his mother, Jake would have slit his father's throat then and there. "She's gone then, boy?" He didn't even look up. "Yes, "Jake mumbled, his anger rising to the surface. "Yes, what—young man?" His ramrod stern tone reprimanded. "Where were you? Where the hell have you been all this time? Didn’t you even care that she was sick?" Jake's voice bellowed through the house, his anger dispelling any fear of his father's reprisal. "I was here, reading and praying for your mother's soul." He turned his dark, piercing gaze toward Jake. "And who is praying for your black soul, father?" Jake spat out through clenched teeth. Before Jake could take another breath, his father snatched him by the shirt collar and pushed him toward the back door. He knew his father believed in discipline. He had the scars on his back to prove it. But Jake was not going to give him the satisfaction. He held his shoulders back mustering every bit of his five-foot six frame, unyielding to the razor strap tearing at the flesh of his back. "It's for your own good, Jacob. This rebellious attitude would come to no good. You must purge your soul of its blackness." One day, you will thank me for this." The rough sandpaper strap smacked across his back, raking across old wounds and tearing through the thin flesh. Tears prickled at the back of Jake's eyes, but he gritted his teeth, determined not to give his father the satisfaction of seeing him cry. 21

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Two more lashings and Jake heard the thump as the strap fell to the wood planks of the back porch. He didn’t bother to look when the screen door slammed behind his father. "I'll give you rebellion, old man." Jake turned on his heel and headed straight for the bordello at the edge of town. *** "What is it you want, Sheriff?" Lil's words, popped into his mind unexpectedly, slamming desire against the wall of his heart. There was no doubt he wanted—and very badly—maybe twice. There was no doubt Jake had dreamt of Lil. He'd dreamed of seeing her body, glistening in the soft lamplight, her dark hair spilled across those red satin pillows he'd only seen from the hallway. And he'd dreamed of her body, soft, warm, and slick beneath his after they'd satiated their passion with hours of making love. He'd dreamed of hearing his name torn from her sweet lips as he brought her to an explosive climax. He shifted on his horse, feeling the painful discomfort of his torrid thoughts. Lord. He had to keep perspective on things. If he was going to run for Sheriff of the District, he'd have to keep his nose clean to please his avid and pristine followers. And lusting after the head madam of the Sweet Magnolia brothel was not going to win him votes with the influential folks he needed on his side. "I'm a librarian, you know." Jake shuddered. God almighty, the woman was a tease. He pictured her covered from head to toe, hair pulled tight in a bun at the nape of her neck, a soft cotton blouse tucked tight in the waistband of a floor-length skirt. Underneath, she wore only that animal print brassiere and whatever the hell she called that strip of cloth that barely covered the soft dark patch where he'd only imagined exploring himself— "Howdy Sheriff Sloan, nice day." The saddle horn rubbing between Jakes legs combined with his thoughts was not helping him stay focused on his purpose. He cleared his throat, hoping the warmth in his face was not showing. "Yep, sure couldn't ask for better." Though he needed a cold shower desperately.

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The man and his wife nodded politely, pleased in having received his neighborly smile. The methodic creak of their wagon seat rattled as they drove past and his mind leapt to the same rhythmic sound, coming from Lilly's bed. Jake groaned, leaning forward on his horse and pressed his heels to the animal's side to pick up his pace. "We'll just hope for nothing more to come up." He reasoned with himself as a wry smile crept upon his face. It was a little late for that.

*** It had been days since Lilly had seen her fantasy Sheriff, but it had given her time to assess her surroundings. At first she figured maybe she was dead and that this was some type of after-life, but the memory of the book, its pictures and Bart's face from her former life flashed intermittent images in her brain. Nonetheless, she had little time to think heavily on her situation. From the time the Sheriff left her in a lusty haze, one woman and then another had knocked on her door asking her advice. What surprised Lillian most was how well she orchestrated their questions and concerns, almost as though she'd been running the public establishment all of her life. She surmised that in some ways running a brothel was similar to running a library, it's just that a card catalog was replaced by thirteen seasoned women who offered assistance to those in search of their desires. In the days that followed, Lil found herself more and more comfortable in her role as Madam. Those around her seemed oblivious to any change in who she was and so she accepted her role unsure of what cosmic opportunity was being given to her. She figured as with most things that if you wait long enough, the truth will be revealed "Lilly, we have a man here who says he needs to speak with you." Lillian looked up from the small desk in a room behind the bar where she'd been going over receipts from the last month. Angel, one of her girls who'd recently come to the brothel after her would-be husband deserted her, had a look of grave concern etched on her beautiful face. "If it's one of those salesmen looking to swap his wares, tell him we're not interested." "I think that maybe you might be interested in what I come for." 23

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The brusque voice rounded the corner of the door, before the face that matched it appeared. The man stared at Lil over Angels shoulder. Lilly could see Angel was afraid. Though life at the Sweet Magnolia was agreeable unconventional, things were generally business as usual, and for the most part non-violent. The man, a good four inches taller and a whole lot more in girth, leaned against the wall, toying with the strap of Angel's gown. "I have plenty of money and I want something real special for it," he muttered as his gaze roamed over Angel’s slender frame. It didn’t take much to see he was bad news. Lil carefully closed her leather bound accounting book and turned in her chair. "I can see that you are a man of discriminating and fine taste in women. Why don't you let me buy you a drink and we can talk about exactly how we can best serve you." Lil cast a glance to Angel with a gaze that cautioned her to remain calm. The man still carried his gun on his hip, a sign that Billy hadn't been able to convince him to leave it at the bar as was the rules for Magnolia guests. Lil stood, cautious not to move too quickly, for fear of Angel's safety. "What do you say? A drink or two of our finest, and maybe a friendly game of cards? It will relax you. Women rarely respond well to a man too wound up with stress." Lil licked her lips, dry from the dust blowing through the open window and the tension hovering in the air. "Okay." The man nodded and gave Lilly a ravenous look. It sent a shiver snaking up her spine. She knew she needed to gain his trust, while someone else ran for help. At any moment, out there on the edge of town, it could turn into a blood bath and no one in town would be the wiser. Lilly smiled, hoping to charm him as she sashayed toward him. She crooked her arm through his as she positioned herself between him and Angel. Lil motioned to Angel with a subtle glance to find a way to sneak out and get help as soon as she got the burly thug to the main room. The stench, days of spent in the heat on a horse, reeked from his body. The man’s breath was putrid, his face unshaven. He had the earmarks of someone who had not come into his sudden wealth by honest hard work. "You say you have lots of money?" Lil motioned to Bill. 24

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"More than this god-forsaken place has ever seen,” the man boasted, his grin more of a snarl on his filthy face. Bile rose in Lilly's throat as she noticed him eyeing her cleavage. "Well, you're probably right." Lilly smiled graciously, trying not to pull away when he clamped his beefy hand on her arm and twirled her around to face him. He stuck his face at the base of her neck, slobbering over her like she was a dog bone. "A fresh bottle of our finest, Bill, for our very special guest, and bring a new deck as well." Lil swallowed the vomit in her throat as she smiled, backing away from the man to hold out a chair for him. She needed to keep up the charade of royal treatment until Angel could get back, hopefully with the good Sheriff. Bill nodded and over his shoulder, Lil spotted Angel crouched low, guiding the man's horse behind her. "How about a little music?" Lil brought the man’s gaze away from the window as she sat at the piano. "You sing?" she asked as she adjusted her skirts to reach the pedals. Lilly wondered how many old Billy Joel tunes she would be able to remember and prayed silently there would be enough to fill the gap until Angel returned.

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Chapter Four

She'd done as she promised. Dammit. The girls were keeping to the arrangement and that should make Jake a happy man. So, why the hell was he so miserable? His relationship, though strained with his aging father did not detour his efforts to find Jake a suitable wife. Several women, some barely into womanhood, others widows had made surprise visits to his office as of late. Still none captured his attention as a man, like Lillian. Jake had secretly wished for a damn ruckus at the Magnolia—hell, for the past few days he'd prayed for one, just for the excuse to see her again. The door of the jailhouse slammed open and the sound of it banging against the stucco wall rattled the teeth in his head. The lone prisoner in one of the cells, a citizen who was sleeping off a night of too much celebrating his recent gold find, stirred on his cot, and covered his head with his pillow. "Sheriff! You got to come quick!" Ben the town's grocer threw his hands in the air, waving them like a mad man. Behind him stood a young woman, her long blonde hair straggled from her upswept curls. Jake pushed from his desk and his carefully constructed house of cards tumbled over its bare surface. It had been a long and uneventful morning. He had a hopeful stirring in his gut, and a few inches lower as well. "What's the trouble?" He grabbed his holster slinging it over his hips and slipped the buckles into place as he waited for the man's reply. "Over at the Magnolia. This gal says there's a crazy man got one of them ladies and is holdin' her hostage." Jake's heart pummeled to his feet. He'd waited for days for a ruckus, but he sure as hell didn’t want any one harmed. 26

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"Did he see you leave?" Jake asked the woman peering from behind Ben, as he fished for his hat behind the door. Her eyes welled with tears. Hell, she couldn’t have been much more than twenty herself. "You stay here with, Ben." Jake turned his attention to the stupefied man. "You fix this lady a nice cup of tea, see if you can find out if he's got the law looking for him." "But Sheriff, my wife'll kill me if—" "Ben, you don't do as I say, you'll have to deal with me. Now pick your poison." Ben nodded and ushered the woman inside the jail's front room. He strode past Ben, heading for his horse as he murmured a silent prayer. "Lord, please don't let the hostage be Lilly."

*** Jake pulled tight on the reins, kicking up a cloud of dust as he hopped off his horse He took the front steps of the Sweet Magnolia's front porch, two at a time. To his right, huddled at the far end of the porch were a few of the girls from the house. Their eyes were wide with fear. He placed a finger to his lips, motioning them to be still as he ducked beneath the window to get a look inside. "Where are they?" He kept his voice low, attempting to calm them as best he could. If things got any worse, he didn't need a gaggle of screaming ladies of the night to have to contend with as well. Even if it could be argued loosely that it came with their job. He slipped in the front door, gun drawn, crouching low as he scanned the rim of the upper stairway and balcony. His ears listened for any sound that would clue him into their whereabouts. "This don't concern you none, Sheriff." The gruff voice of a man who'd had one too many shots of Kentucky's finest emitted from the hallway above. Jake didn't recognize the voice, but he recognized the slur. "Come on out here and let's talk about whatever your concern is." His gaze skipped the entrances of the three separate wings of the house. It appeared the man was alone, and judging from the horse Angel rode in, he had no mode of getting away either. Muffled overhead, he heard the soft voice of Lilly reasoning with her captor. Jake closed his eyes, praying she wouldn’t try something on her own. 27

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"Sheriff Sloan?" Lilly's voice was uncharacteristically high as it approached the railing. She appeared, looking at him over the banister rail, beautiful as ever in a royal blue satin dress. Though disappointingly understated from the last outfit he'd seen her in. "Mr.--" A beefy arm clamped around her waist and the fear in Lilly's eyes clung to Jake's. Jake's stomach lurched and he slowly dropped his hand next to his gun. "Tell him what it is I want, Miss Lilly." The man pressed his unshaven cheek to Lilly's as he stared at Jake over her shoulder. In one hand he held a gun pointed to Lilly’s side, the other he held tight at her waist, jerking her body nauseatingly against him. Every nerve ending on Jake came alive. His gaze held to Lilly's. "Mr. Black would like my company for the evening." She lifted her chin as the man nuzzled her jaw. "I told him I was not taking callers today." Jake had seen his share of men who became cantankerous and mean when drunk. Most times he could talk them to coming to the jail for a warm meal and a place to sleep it off. Once in a great while, he'd run across the more stubborn variety. This guy appeared to be product of the latter, maybe worse. "The lady says she's not taking callers this evening, friend." Jake eased toward the stairs as he spoke, keeping his gaze on Lilly and the man, hoping he could put them both at ease and avoid any bloodshed. "I want this one,” he snarled. “I put down enough cash in this hellhole called a town the past few days. I deserve the best." It made Jake curious to know where the cash had come from. "No doubt you do." Jake stepped slow up the stairs his gun ready at his side. "Maybe tomorrow would be better for the lady?" Lilly's gaze snapped lightening bolts and her lips, bathed with a ruby red tint pressed together in a straight line. She apparently was not beholdin' to the idea. "Well, what if she ain't? I'm a man and I got needs. Isn't this where a man takes care of them needs, Sheriff?" The man argued Jake's logic as though Lilly was a prize animal they were discussing. It turned Jake's stomach. "Well, maybe you could get yourself cleaned up, presentable like, and then come back tomorrow. I bet Lil would see you in an all-together different light. Right, Lil?" 28

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He gave her a pointed look, nodding with a bright smile, hoping she would take his hint to go along with her. "Over my dead body." Her eyes were as cold as a desert night. Jake’s jaw clenched, and he fought not to show his frustration. Not the wise thing to say to a drunken man holding you hostage. The man brandished his gun, waving it in front of Lilly and aiming right at Jake's chest. "Lillian" He hoped she would catch on to what he was trying to do, and help him instead of trying to wind up in the town morgue. "I.'m sorry, I can't do it, Jake." "Jake, is it?" Well, now, I think I understand now, Sheriff. You and this little pretty filly got something going ‘tween you, isthattit?" The man's words slurred and he stumbled backward. Just long enough for Jake to run the rest of the way up the stairs. He stood not three feet from the two of them, he could smell Lilly's perfume mixed with the pungent order of whiskey. "The lady and I have nothing going on between us." Jake glanced at Lilly and her eyes seemed to call him a liar. "Go ahead, tell him, Lil." He nodded toward the man, pressing his brows together for emphasis. "I—" "Lillian." His voice was tight with concern. Why wouldn't the bull-headed woman just work with him? "No, you wouldn’t catch me dead with him." She held his gaze. "Is that a fact?" The man's left hand slid over the bodice of Lilly's gown, groping blatantly as he smiled at Jake. "Guess I should be glad about that. Maybe I will take you up on your suggestion, have me a little piece of this tomorrow. Still, I'm not sure I trust that look in your eyes Sheriff, maybe we ought to just find out—" His grin showed dirty, yellow teeth. Lilly held still, her chin high, keeping her gaze straight ahead. "Come on, sweetheart, we're goin’ to go for a ride, jes’ you and me." The man sidestepped his way to the stairway, holding the gun to Lilly's side. He moved down the stairs with Jake following cautiously behind. 29

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"You won't miss this one, Sheriff. Says she's the librarian type." He chuckled and slid his tongue up the side of Lilly's cheek. That was enough for Jake. From four steps above them, he leapt through the air, knocking the man out of the way and sending Lilly sprawling to the floor as his body covered hers. Shots rang out around him and screams filled in the space as a dull thump left his head in a daze. Another shot and a searing pain coursed through his left buttock. He'd been hit, but his concern was for Lilly. One more shot came from outside, but dazed, Jake could only hope that no one else had gotten hurt during his escape. He rolled off Lilly, landing with a thud on his back, immediately bringing his butt off the floor in pain. A dull ringing thrummed between his ears and he reached up discovering a damp stickiness near his temple. Unsure if the wound was caused by a bullet grazing his head, or if he’d hit his head in the fall, either way, images were beginning to swim hazily before him. Lilly’s lovely face appeared over him. "Get him upstairs, get some hot water." Lilly ushered over the group of women who'd rushed in off the porch. “They stole the Sheriff’s horse.” "He got scared off." A collective gasp rose as the realization that the Sheriff had been shot became clear. "We need some bandages, a bottle of whiskey, and we'll need something to make a poultice." Lilly barked out orders even as Jake sensed he was being lifted. “Hurry now.” "Just get me to my horse." He spoke between clenched teeth. "I need a doctor." "You haven't got a horse at present, Sheriff Sloan." Lilly pushed ahead of the entourage to the top of the stairs. "And there's no time to get a doctor, you’re bleeding all over this beautiful floor. Now hush and you all take him to my bed." It was the one line that made Jake smile, just before his world went black.

*** The erotic images in his dreams were wild, but left him feeling wonderful. Jake smiled, and through the fog, suddenly remembered where he was. 30

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His eyes shot open and without thinking he sat straight up in bed. Pain shot clean up his spine and his scream bellowed throughout the halls of the bordello. "Sheriff Sloan," a familiar voice cajoled, "I suggest that the other clients will wonder what it is I am doing in here to our esteemed man of the law." Jake dropped back on the bed, attempting to bring his heart rate back under control. He squeezed his eyes tight against the pain radiating from his cheek—and not the one on his face. "How long have I been out?" He spoke through clenched teeth, not yet ready to face her, he kept his eyes shut. "Long enough." Jake sensed her move to the side of his bed, her subtle fragrance like rose petals. He peered open one eye. "Long enough? Long enough for what, exactly?" "As if you'd be very good in that capacity at present, Sheriff." She teased with an arched brow and a smile. He was grateful for the heavy quilt covering his lower half. "Lillian, really, how long have I been out?" His fingers dug at his closed eyelids as he attempted to pull out of his groggy state. Good lord, there was no telling what kind of rumors were spreading through town. He realized with a sudden clarity in his brain, that he was stark naked under the blanket. Had Lilly undressed him? His heart began a slow and steady thud causing him to swallow as he tried to detour his brain in another direction. "Two days. The doctor came a few hours after you'd been shot. It was a rather delicate operation being where it was and all." She busied herself with the bowl of water, dipping the rag she held in and out of the bowl, squeezing droplets of water from the cloth. “He got the bullet, though you ended up smacking your head on the table as you leapt to my aid, and that’s what knocked you out for a few days and required a few stitches.” "What's that for?" He eyed the bowl, returning to her gaze, catching what he thought was a nervous glance. "I thought you might need a bath." "Miss Lillian, I don't think that's an all-together good idea." He shook his head. "Nope, not a good idea at all." 31

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"I hadn't planned on seducing you, Sheriff." Lilly placed a delicate hand on one hip capturing his gaze. "Unless, of course, you were to ask me--politely." Heat flared in his belly rendering him speechless. “Besides, I was only going to do the top half, Sheriff. The doctor suggested that it might help after the fever broke." "I had a fever?" For the life of him, Jake couldn't remember the last forty-eight hours. "I'm afraid so. There was so much flailing around and moaning and groaning, it made some of my girls blush crimson." Lil grinned and he knew then she was teasing him, unmercifully. Oddly, it also relaxed him. "We just took it that you had a fever. Doc Bennett said that's probably what it was." She shrugged and the frilly strap of her lace camisole slipped to her elbow, revealing her slender pale shoulder. White—a sign of purity. Jake felt his fever returning, but it was for Lilly. He wanted to tell her how he'd dreamed of her, but decided against it. "Can I get some help back to my office?" He scanned the room, looking for his clothes, realizing that he was in Lil's room and how utterly feminine it was. The red satin sheets he lay between slid cool over his skin as he crooked his leg to ease the soreness. He sighed, wishing he could stand—wishing frankly, he could do a lot of things. Some of which had nothing to do with flesh wounds. "Doc Bennett suggested that since the house was not terribly busy that you just as well stay put and let your wound--" She nodded to his lower half. "Heal proper." "I can't stay here. I've got duties in town. There's a town meeting this week—I think it's this week—" He pressed his fingers to his forehead as though trying to jumpstart his brain. Lilly's presence had already managed to do the same for other parts of him. "I'm supposed to be meeting with my campaign committee." "They're welcome to meet here in a few days when you're feeling better." She pinned him with a business-like look. Jake gave her a skeptical side glance and realized she was clearly serious. "I don't think that’s a good idea." She said nothing, nodding with a shrug of that shoulder once again, this time revealing the sumptuous, rounded edge of her breast peeking above the material. 32

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His fingers itched to reach out and slide his palm over the gentle slope, cupping the sweet mound of flesh, knowing that she would fit perfectly in his palm. Lil focused on the rag in her hand. "Well, the doctor said you shouldn't be out of bed for a couple of days at any rate." As if aware of his thoughts, Lilly tugged the flimsy ruffle back on her shoulder cutting off his view. It was just as well, of all the luck--he finds himself held prisoner in Lilly’s bed, and for more reasons than one, he can't do a thing about it.

*** "But, maybe if you sit up and lean to the right we can get you a little freshened up. It will no doubt help you rest more comfortably." Lilly leaned over Jake and slid her arm along the back of his shoulders. With a bit of persuasion, she sighted in a final attempt to convince him, that cleanliness was after all, next to Godliness—or, so the Good Book says. After a moment of thought, he agreed His scent was masculine; his body warm from sleep, and the flesh and muscle beneath her hands was firm and sleek. "Work with me here, Sheriff," she grunted as she tugged his shoulders from the bed. "You seem to still be awfully weak." Lillian wasn't sure if he truly lacked the strength or not, however, it appeared his eyesight was clearly in working order. "Are you enjoying the view, Sheriff?" "What?" It was obvious she'd interrupted his assessment of her cleavage. Again. "Lillian, you know that I don't—" "Right Sheriff, but it does seem you enjoy looking, even if you've promised yourself that you don't want to touch." She paused in her struggle of lifting him upright, gaining a measure of satisfaction that the camisole dipped, revealing her best asset. Aside from her sparkling personality, of course—which she was beginning to discover she truly enjoyed, more and more. "I know the promise Sheriff, but can you truly deny that you aren't just a little curious?" Lillian found it difficult to breathe as she watched his eyes darken. He licked his lips. 33

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Aside from his steady breathing, only a light breeze through the fluttering bedroom curtains could be heard. "Would it help if I said I want you to touch me, as much as I'm guessing you want to?" Lillian couldn't believe the words were coming from her mouth, yet in the same moment she knew she couldn't turn from him. “I owe you a great debt of gratitude. You saved my life, Sheriff Sloan.” "So soft…Lilly--I," his whispered words sent a delicious chill up her spine. Unrestricted, her nipples tightened seeing the raw hunger in his eyes. "I can see it in your eyes, Jake." She released her hold, letting go carefully so he lay back against the pillows. His hand snapped around her wrist. "Don't go." Fire sparkled in his dark orbs and her skin burned beneath his fingers. She backed slowly away from the bed, reaching behind her with one hand searching for the door. Her fingernails scraped at the wood and she pushed it shut hard enough to make it click. He held her in his captive gaze. "What about your promise?" Lillian loved the way he looked at her, fairly salivating from want. "I promise…its not just lust, Lilly." He swallowed hard. "About that bath—" "I want one." He reached for the bowl, sitting it beside him on the bed. Reaching in, he curled the rag in his hand and squeezed as he held her gaze. He might as well have thrown a match at her. He used the strength of his arms, pushing himself until his ample biceps bulged with strength so he could brace himself upright. The butterflies in Lillian’s stomach had gone from flutter to full-fledged rampage. He held the cloth out to her. Not certain how her feet moved, she stood at the bedside, lifted her cotton petticoat above her knees and straddled his legs. The bowl tipped precariously splattering them with tepid water. She laughed, surprised at how nervous she was, yet how much she wanted this moment with him. "Am I hurting you?" She rose up on her knees.

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He stared up at her with the reverence of an angel. "You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." He reached up with the back of his fingers brushing the hair back from her temple. “Sit down, Lil." "Are you in pain?" She closed her eyes as his palm came to rest on her cheek. "Horrible," he whispered as he leaned forward, touching his lips to the hollow of her neck, trailing scorching kisses to her chin. She turned her head as his mouth sought to mate with hers. "Rules, Sheriff. No kissing on the lips. It's too—" She searched his coal-colored eyes, and then her gaze dropped to his mouth. Lillian traced the fullness of his lower lip. "It’s too personal." Jake's brow arched in a dubious response and she could see he was weighing whether or not to break the rule. "I'm already breaking a rule." He held her face in his hand and she knew he was challenging her. "You're breaking your rule, not the Magnolia's." She wouldn't meet his gaze, knowing he would see that she really didn't give a damn about any rules. A moment of silence ticked by. "Ok, Lil, we'll play by the Magnolia's rules. Here is one more--no one can know about us. No one. Is that understood?" Lillian squeezed her eyes shut as she kept her head down, the sting of his remark hit closer than she'd anticipated--worse than any bullet to her heart. "Because of the politics?" she whispered. "It's my future, Lil." His voice sounded so reasonable, it was hard for her to understand why it angered her. Wasn't this after all, what life in a bordello was all about? Stay detached from the customer and don't let your emotions get messed up with the act. Just show them a good time and pat them goodbye in the morning. She didn't want to have to say goodbye to Jake. "Of course, it's our secret, Sheriff." She undid the top pearl button that held together the thin camisole across her shoulders and it fell open for his full view. "Lord almighty." His voice shook with such emotion that it tore at Lilly's insides. In order to protect her heart from breaking, she decided to pretend that he cared more for her than just as a free-spirited lady of the night. 35

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The desire in his gaze as he stared at her made her smile. Could it be the squeaky Sheriff was as new to this as she was? She knew he was a preacher’s son, but it was hard to believe that a catch like Jake Sloan had not had his way with women before. Then again, with the women she’d heard his father was tossing in his path—but that didn’t matter. Whatever they had between them was here and now, theirs alone and she had every intention of enjoying it fully. Lil reached for the cloth, and rubbed it over the hard muscle of his chest, slowly gliding the cloth from shoulder to shoulder. She leaned forward to wash the back of his neck, and he met her halfway, pushing against the mattress with his fists to hold himself upright. She leaned over his shoulder, pressing her breasts unashamed against his sinewy strength, releasing a sigh as his lips brushed across her shoulder. A gust of wind sent the curtains waltzing in the air and she heard his quiet moan of pleasure. There would be a storm in the desert tonight, she could sense it as well as the tingling she felt beneath her skirt. "Now it's your turn, Sheriff." She held the rag out to him. "Lil--" His gaze, warm and ready yet unsure, shot to hers. He was struggling with his morals she knew, and part of her was grateful. Still, she'd come this far and in truth, she didn't want to let it end here. She could only hope he felt the same. She cautiously placed the wet cloth in his hand, holding them both in her hand as she guided him to just above her breast. The water trickled in rivulets over her warm skin, causing her to shudder beneath his touch. Lil let her hand fall away as Jake cupped her gently. "Lilly, you're magnificent." He tossed the rag aside, kneading softly, caressing her, gently brushing his thumb over her pink tips tight with anticipation "You can kiss me anywhere else--" she sighed dropping her head back in the pleasure he was offering. His mouth warm and wet, kissed each swell as he held her reverently in his palms, the tip of his tongue darting out to sample each pebbled bud. 36

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Lillian clamped her hands to his shoulders, relishing in the languid movements of his tongue and teeth. If he'd not done this before, he certainly was a quick study. "Lilly, I'm about to burst, but this damn wound on my butt. I'm afraid it'll--" He laughed as he swiped a hand over his face, heaving a frustrated sigh. His gaze met hers speaking volumes that he wished he could do more. She leaned forward and gently placed a kiss to his forehead. "You forget where you are, Sheriff. We have ways to handle that." She smiled and though in truth, she'd never done what she was about to do, she wanted to be the one to please him. He grabbed her around the waist, pulling her flat against his chiseled torso with his face a breath from hers. "Call me Jake, Lilly. Please, when we're together, that’s all I ask." She nodded, her words came out in a whisper as she held his dark gaze. "Okay…Jake." He loosened his hold and she pushed up on her knees, taking her time as she drew the blanket to his hips. He was incredible, more man than she'd ever imagined herself with. His hand covered hers, as if he wasn't sure, but Lil was. "Just relax," she said, her mind already assimilating how she was going to perform a feat that she'd never done before. No one in the bordello knew who she was, nor suspected she might be a virgin, which she was, likely the oldest living virgin in this town. But seeing him beneath her, his eyes eating her alive, made her want to forget everything else. She touched the jewel around her neck and smiled as she caught Jake's warm gaze. Suddenly everything was right, as it should be in the great scheme of things. Lilly slid the covering lower, her heart racing as he came into view. He reached out and caught her wrist. "Relax, Jake. You'll feel much better soon." He was engorged, hard and proud and she was pleased that she'd been the one to get him there Now, she just needed to finish what she'd started. Doubt skipped through her mind and for a fleeting second, she felt inept to be trying to play the seductress role. What if she hurt him? What if she didn't do this right? Lil grappled with a million excuses as she gently tugged the blanket from the death grip of his fingers. 37

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"You ever done this before, Jake?" Her throat was tight. If she was nervous, then he would surely know it. He glanced up at her with an expression somewhere between sheepish and excitement. Excitement was good. It fueled her resolve. Neither of them had ever done this. Perfect, at least if she messed up, he wouldn’t know it. Lil took a deep breath and closed her eyes, determined to make this a pleasurable experience for both of them. She took the cloth, gently gliding the cloth the length of him, holding him in her palm, allowing the sensation to takeover her senses. Next she stroked his thighs, relishing in the strength of sinewy muscle, imagining the lucky saddle between his legs that he rode daily. Pleased when his expression relaxed, she wrapped her fingers deftly around his length. Jake pressed his head against the pillow, his eyes shut tight. A strangled moan escaped his lips. "I have a confession to make." Lil ran her palm over his rigid washboard stomach as the other stroked, wanting to give to him every morsel of pleasure she could afford— save the most important—her heart. She lowered her head, taking his tip between her lips, her tongue flicking sensuously over his smooth flesh. She adored the taste of his skin on her tongue. "God, Lilly—" His hands fisted the covers, his face turning crimson from the strain. She felt the slow gyration of his hips trying to accommodate the motion of her hand and fought the desperation of the need to have him buried deep inside her. "Lilly. I can't—" He growled as through trying to stay in control. Lilly reveled quietly in the power she had over him, watching him unravel before her eyes. With a final thrust of his hips, he arched his back, and gave a primal scream. She'd forgotten about the buttock muscles flexing with his climax.

*** Lilly's mouth covered his, stifling the guttural moan emitting from his throat.

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His satisfied groan sounded foreign to Jake's ears. Gawd almighty, no woman had ever done that to him before. Her lips tasted like sweet wine and felt like heaven against his mouth. Jake wrapped his arms around her pulling her against him, and held her head to prevent her from changing her mind. She'd used the kiss--he sensed--to muffle his scream, but as long as she was there, he had other ideas. Forget the rules. Lacing his tongue with hers, he devoured her mouth, wanting to capture forever what had transpired between them. He knew it could never happen again, it shouldn't at any rate. The risk was simply too great--to his future, to his heart—and to hers. He cupped her face, gently pushing her from him, committing to memory the delicate flush in her cheeks, her lips soft and swollen from kissing him. "Lilly." He pressed her forehead to his and closed his eyes. "I forgot about your injury." "Lil," he chuckled quietly, "that was the last thing on my mind." "Oh." A soft blush crept pink into her cheeks. "I hope it was--okay." He took a deep breath, hard as it was for him to admit that he'd never had an experience like what he'd just had with her. "It was fine. Just fine, thanks.” She arched a brow as though she could see right through him. "How about you?" Then he chuckled. What an absurd notion, obviously the woman, being who she was—well, let’s just say this was probably nothing unusual. "I didn't mean that it—that you—were inexperienced." "Of course." She took a deep breath, pulled away and averted her gaze to the water bowl that had spilled in the heat of passion, soaking the sheets. "Guess I need to change these." "For more than one reason." He smiled feeling suddenly awkward. Glancing down, he swore he saw her blush—a strange reaction for a lady of her profession. "You can use the cloth and we'll change the sheets later." She quickly scooted off the bed, adjusting her camisole as she escaped his arms. "I'll have them bring up a tub so you can soak. It will help your wound." With a quick brush of her hand through her hair, she checked her reflection in the mirror. Lil glanced over her shoulder and flashed him a bright grin as though nothing spectacular had happened. "I'll go check on your supper." 39

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Food? She could think about food at a time like this? "Lilly? Are you going to be all right?" He'd been a fool, not realizing right away that she'd done everything for him and what had she received in return? "I'm dandy, Sheriff. You should rest. I'll have one of the girls bring up your food tray." How the hell could he make things right? Part of him was ready to pull her back into bed and give to her the pleasure she'd shown to him, his reasonable side considered how the scandal of it would spread like wildfire to his political competition. He settled on taking her suggestion. Her example of not letting their emotions get involved was no doubt the better idea. Jake reached for the cover, pulling it back up to his waist. As his eyes drifted shut he had to admit, he did feel a hell of a lot less tense. He envisioned her again, leaning over him, her hair tickling his chest, the sweet smell of her skin and the taste of her mouth. His hands tingled with the memory of the weight of her breasts. Jake's breath hitched as he thought of that moment before his body shattered beneath her gentle guidance, and in the next instant frowned from something else invading his thoughts-"I have a confession to make."

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Chapter Five

Lillian scolded herself for crying. All of her research had given her the head knowledge that women in her profession were not expected to have emotion and that they could go about the robotic gestures, simply walking away with nary a thought, until the next client came along. As long as the men paid, spent money at the bar, and treated the women nicely, she supposed they were there to perform a service of sorts. She realized that neither she nor Jake had brought up the subject of payment. Lillian swiped a tear from her cheek as she changed into a borrowed a dress from one of the other girls. She didn’t want to face Jake again, the pain was too much and too confusing. There was no doubt that there was something there between them all right, but it was of the dangerous variety that would only lead to heartache. She twirled the necklace between her fingers and considered whether a lifetime of loneliness was comparable to giving your heart freely to be broken. A gentle tap sounded on the door of the bedroom she was staying in while Jake recuperated. "Miss Lilly? I took Sheriff Jake his supper like you asked me to." "Thank you, Nellie." She laced up the corset-style placket on the bodice of the dress. It's effect pushing her bust up, much the same as a modern day push-up bra. Odd that she'd not given much thought to former things. Perhaps the loneliness of that life is what brought here--to find her destiny. Was Sheriff Sloan her soul mate? The odds looked fairly slim thus far. The warm red ruby gem lay nestled in the valley of her cleavage and she touched it remembering her few moments of unbridled passion earlier. "Anyone around here play that upright piano downstairs, Nellie?" Lillian called out. She had the sudden urge to plunk out a bluesy "he-done-you-wrong" honky-tonk 41

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song—maybe several and liberally laced with a good shot or two of that fine whiskey folks boasted the Magnolia as having. "Why, Miss Lilly," there was a tittering laugh from beyond the door, "you do." For the first time, she was grateful she'd learned at some point in her life, the art of playing piano. She played all the songs she could remember that spoke of lost love and broken hearts. Belting out off-key, she surmised by the stares, what words she could remember. Several of the women with evening guests passed by offering curious glances at what probably sounded like strange music, but Lillian didn't care. She needed to purge her soul of Sheriff Jake Sloan. The Kentucky Bourbon helped some.

*** She chose wisely to stay away from Sheriff Jake, hoping that on the third day the doctor would deliver him from the bondage of her bedroom and she could move on with her life, whatever and wherever that took her. Sweeping her hair atop her head, she secured it in place with a couple of combs. Her necklace sparkled in the morning sun and she stared at it in her reflection in the mirror. The brief thought that this might well be her life now crossed her mind briefly, but it was quickly replaced by the image of Jake Sloan's glittering eyes as he held her. Granted, he hadn't made love to her, but had she pressed him a little further, Lillian was sure the experience would have brought them both immense pleasure. It was in Jake's make-up to please--that much of herself she saw right away in his persona. Doing the right thing for his image was also in his persona. Something inside of her yearned to tell him that he didn't have to pretend around her. She already understood what it was like to live up to other's people's expectations. And how sometimes, you have to follow your heart. She stepped behind the canvass dressing screen and swirled her hand in the warm bath she'd had drawn for morning. It had taken three men to pull another tub from downstairs, but because she was Lil, they obliged her request with a smile, a whiskey, and a tip of their hats. Lillian dropped her robe over the top of the screen and eased into the bathwater sighing audibly as her body immersed into its comforting depth. 42

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She dropped her head back against the edge, closed her eyes and let her troubled mind wander. Somewhere in the recesses of her brain a tabby cat popped into her thoughts. Lillian felt a finger lift the jewel at her neck. "It's beautiful, but doesn't hold a candle to you, Lil." She opened her eyes and sunk deeper into the water. The grasp Jake had on the necklace fell as her body immersed into the water. Her heart experienced a brief moment of panic. Her plan to steer clear of Sheriff Jake Sloan had worked—up to now. What his very presence did to her was unruly. She tried not to let her brain remember his chiseled torso, now hidden beneath chambray shirt he wore, or the exquisite form of his manhood, even now pulling the fabric tight against the worn cloth of his pants. Lillian swallowed forcing her gaze upward to his serious expression. Unaware of her ogling, Jake pulled a chair close to the tub, turning its back to her and sitting astride it. He leaned his elbow on the top rung and rested his chin on his forearm. He looked completely at ease. That made one of them. "I wanted to talk to you about what happened the other day." Lillian was not at all certain she wished to discuss something she'd been trying to forget for the past three days. "I see you're feeling better." Lillian lifted her chin, determined to prove she could control the desire "You've been avoiding me." She let her hand drift through the water, watching the ripples in the wake of her hand. "Isn't that what you wanted?" He glanced away and chewed on his lip as though deep in thought. "If there was any other way, if this was any other time." Lillian chuckled at the irony of his words. "What you mean to say is that if I were a woman of any other profession, your voters wouldn't mind us mattress dancing, right Sheriff?" Lillian's anger at his prejudice seethed beneath the surface. His head snapped back in surprise and his mouth dropped open. Obviously he'd never had a women speak to the very heart of a matter—and perhaps not with such an 43

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attitude. Still, Lillian was tired of trying to be something she was not in order to satisfy what others expected. "I just wanted to say thanks, Lil." His voice smoothed over her skin like the warmth of the water, but the pain of his prejudice ran much deeper. "Sure thing, Sheriff, anytime." "We're just from different worlds, you and me, Lil." He was right on that score. "No problem, Sheriff." Lillian wanted him to leave as she felt the tears begin to constrict her throat. "Friends?" He stuck out his hand in a gesture of goodwill. She wanted to tell him she would never see him as just a friend. Lillian kept her focus on his reflection in the water as she reached for his hand. Tears plunked like raindrops in the water. He grabbed her hand. "Lil, dammit, this is no time for tears." "Sorry, Sheriff." She swiped the back of her hand under her eye. "I just don’t think we're going to be able to be friends." "Don't do this, Lil." His fingers grasped her hand and held tight. "Do what, Sheriff? Have emotions? Care?" She jerked her hand free. "Can you please hand me that towel?" He reached for the towel at the end of the bed and held it to her. She snatched it from him. "What it is with men anyway? Turn around, please." He cast his gaze to the ceiling and turned in his chair, heaving a sigh. "This hardly seems necessary, does it, Lil?" "Sorry Sheriff, no more free shows. You think because I dress a certain way that I have no emotions, no feelings? Well, you are so wrong, buster. I do." She jammed her finger into his shoulder causing him to lurch forward from the chair. "Lil—" "First, I have to contend with jabs about "Miss Lillian and her cardigan sweaters, and long skirts" that apparently turn men off." She stepped from the tub, as she wrapped the towel around her. Jake turned his head marginally. "I wouldn’t care if you wore long--" 44

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"Turn around, Sheriff." Lillian had more to say and it was time she said it, no matter who understood--or didn't. Besides, if he looked at her, she'd lose whatever nerve she was hanging by a thread to. "Yet, I can wear the most provocative clothing of a bordello madam and still it apparently turns a man off." "Lil, you're not making much sense." Jake turned then, resting his elbow on the back of the chair. Sure he looked confused, but dammit so was she. Someone else ought to share in that. "All my life, I pretended to be the ultra-intellectual, deep, understanding, and even-keeled sort of woman in hopes that I would attract the same kind of man. I thought if I could find someone like me, I'd be deliriously happy." Jake nodded, and then frowned. "You're losing me here, Lil." She paced in front of the screen, tufting her fingers through her damp hair as she walked. "So now here I am, the madam, the queen of the Sweet Magnolia, the crème de la crème of bordello hussy's." She threw her hands in the air in exasperation. "I have lacy camisoles, and satin dresses, fine jewels, and still--" She stamped her foot. "Still, I cannot attract one good man. What is the problem, Jake? Why can’t I find Mr. Right?” Jake scratched his head and grinned as he stood and walked to her side. "If you'd wear that animal print number I first saw you in, I guarantee you'd have plenty of men tearing each other apart to get to you." He touched her shoulder turning her to face him. "Then again, I'm not sure that would make me very comfortable either." She focused on the chambray shirt covering the exquisite chest she knew was underneath. "Confused about what you want, Sheriff?" He inhaled deep. "What are you looking for, Lil?" "I have this problem though, Sheriff. I don't want just any man." His gaze narrowed as he studied her, he knew what she was about to say. "I want you, Jake. "I never said I wasn't attracted." He smoothed his hand over her bare shoulder and up the curve of her neck, holding her cheek in his palm. "But, it's only temporary. I know you're ashamed of me Jake, of who I am." She dared to look at him then, and saw the flash of her truth in his eyes. 45

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"That’s not true, Lil," he whispered touching his lips to her forehead. "Jake, you said as much to me not less than ten minutes ago." "You make me crazy, Lil. I wasn't expecting this." Heat radiated from his body, blocking the airflow between them. Lillian wanted him to fan the flame igniting inside her. "You make me crazy, too, Sheriff." "What did you mean when you said you had a confession?" Jake took her hands, pulling her to sit on his lap as he returned to the chair. Maybe by telling him the truth, he would begin to see that together they could work through the prejudices. "Okay.” She took a deep breath as she smoothed her hand over his shoulder. “Would you believe I'm a librarian from the twenty-second century?" Shivers ran across her shoulders as he placed gentle kisses on her still damp skin. "Right now you got my head in such a spin, I think I'd believe anything you told me." He slipped two fingers over the towel covering the valley between her breasts. He tugged once, gently pulling the towel away from her body. “Doc says I’m all healed.” "I'm serious, Jake." He stared at her and this time it was obvious her words had sunk in. "Lilly, I've always known you as—as, well, the madam of this, uh…the Sweet Magnolia." "I'm telling you the truth, Jake." She searched his face, hoping that something would click and he would see with clarity why she was there--that destiny—fate, whatever it was called, had brought them together—that they were meant to be together. Jake stood up slowly, easing her from his lap. His lips pressed together in a hard thin line. "Listen, I have some things in town that require my attention, Lil." He reached for the towel, now on the floor and gingerly wrapped it around her With a business-like air he stepped back and took another long look at her, before he tipped his hat, and promptly left without so much as a goodbye. Lil clutched the towel to her breast as the door slammed behind him. 46

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Chapter Six

"The twenty-second century?" Jake chuckled quietly and shook his head as he shuffled through the myriad of papers in front of him. The packet of papers had arrived from the present governor while he was recuperating and they requested his approval and support. Having the governors backing would bode very well for his career. All he could think of was Lilly. And his body burned. Jake's mind whirled in a sea of confusion. Lillian was like no woman he'd ever met. These last few days showed him a side of her strength that he'd rarely seen in a woman before, yet at the same time she had a vulnerable side that didn't match the independent and bawdy image she portrayed…or tried to. The woman was a quandary for certain and had a body for sin. Jake sighed and ran his hand over his mouth as he leaned back in his chair. "Problem, Sheriff?" Jake glanced at the latest guest of the Deadwater Gulch jail. "Nothing that I can't handle, old man." The prisoner sat on the single cot, his hands fisted over his knees. He'd probably been a bit rowdy at the saloon last night. He seemed harmless enough now. This was the first time Jake had met his new visitor. "What brings you to town, stranger?" Perhaps distracting his thoughts from Lilly would help. "Jez' passin' thru. Hear they've found gold in these here parts." Jake's chair creaked as he walked over to the old wood burning stove. He pulled a tin cup from the nail holder on the wall. Pouring part of a cup he walked to the cell. "Here, this might help take the edge off last night." The man met Jake at the bars and he noticed despite the man's scruffy exterior, his eyes sparkled clear and crystalline blue. 47

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"Thanks, Sheriff." He took the cup and carefully sipped its contents, holding it up as he glanced at Jake. "Don't suppose this will help your problem?" Jake blinked from the man's gaze. "I haven't got any problems." Not any he wished to discuss with a prisoner at any rate. "I'm not the person most people see me as, Sheriff." His words fairly slapped Jake in the back of the head. He spun on his heel. "What'd you say?" The old man shrugged and his long white braids shrugged with his shoulders. "Guess most folks aren't who they say they are." "What are you getting at?" Jake had the odd feeling this man was tapping into his thoughts. "No need to get riled, Sheriff." The man smiled pleasantly. Jake sensed that "riled" was exactly what he’d hoped to achieve. "A man's got to do what a man's got to do, sometimes." Jake locked into the man's steady gaze. "Same goes for a woman, I 'spect." One eye narrowed as he stared at Jake. "Don't make 'em a bad person a 'tal." "Who are you--?" "Sheriff? Got a minute? I need you to look over this guest list for the fundraiser on Friday." Nathan Stiles, Jake's first deputy and volunteer campaign manager, stood at the entrance waving the papers like an American flag. Jake frowned at the old man sipping his coffee acting as if they hadn't been having a most cryptic conversation. Yet something in the old mans words stuck in his craw. "Let me take a look." Jake held out his hand and grabbed the papers, ignoring the look on Nathan's face. "Let him go after he finishes, Nate." Jake tipped his head toward the cell, keeping his focus to the list. "Uh—" Silence followed and Jake glanced up, following Nate's puzzled gaze. The cell was empty. Jake's gaze shot to the where one cup hung secure from the wall. "The old man? Where'd he go?" 48

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Nathan shrugged. "It's been quiet in town, Sheriff, I was grateful with you being locked up in the Sweet Magnolia and all." "I wasn't being held against my will." Jake corrected as he scanned the room looking for evidence of the old man, or his mind, he wasn’t sure which was lost at the moment. "We'll keep that between us, Sheriff." Nathan grinned. "So you didn’t lock up an old man, with long white braids and blue eyes talking about gold?" Nathan rolled his shoulders as though he was getting edgy. Jake understood the feeling all too well. "Sheriff? You think you might be a havin' a little spell maybe after your injury?" Nathan pushed back his hat and tucked his hands in his back pockets. "That would hardly affect my brain, Nathan." Nathan shrugged with a perplexed expression and cast his gaze to the floor. Jake stared in silence at the empty cell. Maybe he was having a 'spell.' From the twenty-first century. Or was there more truth to what Lilly was talking about than he gave her credit for. Whatever the case, he had to talk to her again. "Nathan, watch over things for a while and hang on to this, there may be some changes." He tossed the list to his desk and grabbed his hat by the front door.

*** Lil had had about all of this fantasy that she could stomach. She searched through her madam's clothing and found the bra and panties that she'd arrive in. The simple gesture of adjusting her bra brought back memories of Jake's hands on her skin. Still, he'd not turned out to be the cowboy that would ride off with her into the sunset. Snapping from her daydream, Lillian toyed nervously with her necklace as she glanced around the room, making sure everything was just as it was when she awoke in the room. She'd seen Somewhere in Time. All Christopher Reeve had to do was go to sleep and his will took him back in time. How hard would it be to try in reverse? She plumped the red satin pillows, stopping a moment to inhale the Bay Rum scent of Jake that still lingered on the fabric. Or was that her imagination? 49

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The sun was setting low in the desert sky as she crawled atop the cool red coverlet and lay back against the pile of pillows. Lillian closed both eyes, and with a sudden panic, peered through one eye to take a last look around. She wanted to remember the good times she'd experienced here. She wanted to remember Jake. Her memories might well be the only thing to keep her warm when she was old. A rush of shivers ran over Lillian's bare flesh and she sighed as she closed her eyes. She thought of his gentle eyes, the warmth of skin against hers. If there was ever someone that could fill all her specifications of a life long mate, it was Jake Sloan. Her breathing slowed as she pictured him in her mind, wishing with all her heart that things could be different. Lillian thought of him as she slept.

*** "Lilly?" A fierce whisper came from nearby with someone shaking her shoulders and jarring her from a most exquisite dream—one with her and Sheriff Sloan on a blanket beneath the desert night sky. "Lilly, I need to talk to you." The familiar voice pulled her out of the deep sleep she'd been in. Her mind grappled with her thoughts piecing together reality and fantasy. Jake sounded so real. "Lilly, I have some things to say and you're just going to have to hear them." Her shoulders shook again under a pair of strong hands. "Wake up, Lil. Lord almighty woman wake up so I can get this off my chest." Lillian lifted one eyelid and focused on Jake's face not but a few inches from hers. His breath smelled of coffee and his skin like the outdoors. If it was a dream, she hoped to never awaken. "What are you doing here? I thought you didn’t want to see me anymore." Even to her own ears, her words sounded slurred. She swallowed against the dryness in her throat, wondering how deep of a sleep she'd dropped into. "It's me, Lil. Listen, sit up here so I can say what I came to say. Then if you don't like it, I'll pack up and move out of your life for good." 50

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Lillian opened her mouth to speak, to tell him that was the last thing she wanted. His kiss caught her off guard as much as his sudden retreat from her mouth. She licked her lips hoping the taste would make him real. "Lilly, I've been acting like a fool." Jake tipped back his hat and scratched his forehead with his thumb. "I've been so wrapped up in this election and with trying to do what's right for everyone else that I've plum forgotten how to see what's right for me-right in front of me." She blinked away the fog in her brain. "Jake, slow down and once more from the top." Lilly pushed herself to her elbows and brushed back the hair from her face. She felt a little like Sleeping Beauty and prayed that Jake was here as her prince. However, if facial expression had anything to do with it, he looked as though he'd swallowed a lemon—whole. "Why are you dressed like that?" He jabbed a finger toward her. "You got guests arriving?" Lillian caught his gaze as it dropped to assess her clothing—or lack thereof. She shook her head no. "I was going back." "Where to, Lilly? You weren't thinkin' of leaving me...not now." He sat on the edge of the bed, bracing himself either side of her and stared into her face. She swallowed. "I was going back home." Jake nodded, his dark eyes glinting like a river at night. "Back to the future, you mean?" "That’s already been done, but it was a great movie." Jake squinted one eye with a puzzled expression. "But you're still here." Lillian smiled then with relief, "So it seems, Sheriff. Now what was that you had to talk to me so urgently about?" "Lilly, there are some things that just defy explanation." He stood, crossing his arms and walked to the end of the bed. Surprised by his sudden shift of attention, she agreed watching him check the street through the curtains. "True enough, Sheriff." "Jake." He tossed her a direct look. "Oh right, Jake. That’s what I'm to call you whenever we're together, right? But no one can know that, because—" 51

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"Lilly, what I am about to say is--" Jake placed his palms over his eyes and sighed. "I've never said this before and I don’t ever plan on saying it again to another soul." Lillian sat up, tucking her long legs under her. Now he had her full attention. "Then by all means, Jake," she softened her voice, "say what you came to say." He turned and sat on the edge of the dresser and licked his lips. The man had a gorgeous mouth. Lillian forced her gaze to his eyes. "Lillian, I know that we've not known each other very long, but I—" He paced back and forth at the end of the bed, nervously running a hand over his mouth as though trying to find the right words. His boots thumped across the dusty wood planks, matching the sound of Lillian's heart. "What, Jake?" Lillian found it hard to breath. She wanted to hear that he felt the same as she did about him. She wanted him to tell her that it didn’t matter what her profession was, or how she dressed, that it was the woman inside her was in love with. Love? Was that it then? Was she in love with Sheriff Jake Sloan? "I—lo--," he hesitated briefly, "I have a fierce affection for you, Lillian." Lillian dropped her gaze to the bed and smiled softly. "How fierce, Jake?" "Plum fierce, Lillian." She heard him walk to the side of the bed. "Then I suppose its okay for me to tell you that I feel somewhat the same." Lillian glanced up and caught his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed. "You do?" He frowned. "Only somewhat?" "Seriously plum." His shoulders eased as he gave her a sexy smile. "You really couldn't tell, Jake? You think I'd do what I did with you to just any man?" Jake glanced away with a puzzled expression. Well, of course he would think so. She was supposed to be a bordello madam, wasn't she? "I don't Jake." She spoke as she got to her knees and walked across the bed on wobbly knees. She lost her balance and he reached out and grabbed her shoulders. "You mean to tell me--?" He studied her face. "I told you, Jake. I'm a librarian." 52

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"But the way you touched me—you're a--this is--a bordello, Lil." His stupefied expression pleased her. "That’s pretty astute for a guy who's never been to one, professionally speaking, of course." "Well, my work keeps me pretty busy, Lil." He scanned her again from head to toe. "You sure aren't the image I have of a librarian." Lillian smiled. "Does it matter? I'm a woman, the same as any other woman. Looking for the man who is strong enough to let me be who I am. You brought out that side of me. You accepted that part of me when no one else had." He placed his hand on her cheek. "Good lord, Lillian. Can a man get hard from hearing a woman talk?" Lillian briefly considered late night television and nodded. She smiled. "You want me to keep talking?" He nodded slowly. Lillian smiled as she carefully turned each button of Jake's shirt, her gaze focused at the perfect package being unwrapped before her eyes. She glanced at his expression, his eyes beginning to darken and felt her heart stumbling toward the abyss of passion awaiting them. A mixture of fear and excitement washed over her in a wave as she peeled his shirt over his masculine shoulders revealing the massive chest, muscled from natural hard work. All logic was swept away as she ran her fingers down the smooth, tan plane of his chiseled torso, the nerves in her fingers tingled as they brushed over through the dark line of soft hair that disappeared beneath his jeans. Lillian leaned forward running the tip of her tongue along the base of his neck, her inhibitions set free by a power greater than she understood. "I want you to do to me what I did to you." Her hand brushed over the front of his pants feeling the length of him in her palm. His brows shot up under his hat and he covered her hand with is. She massaged him pleased he was growing hard. "I want to feel your hands on me, Jake." She grabbed his hands pressing them to her bare breasts, then down her ribs, relishing that he took command of his hands and slid them around her drawing her close. 53

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His grasp trailed lower and a groan emitted deep from his chest as he cupped her behind "Lilli—" He blinked once, as though pulled from a trance and looked over his shoulder at the shut door. "It's too early, everyone's still sleeping, Jake." She smiled. "They've been busy, Jake." Lillian nipped his shoulder raking her teeth across the rugged taste of his skin. "I want to feel your skin, Jake." Her heart raced, enjoying the fact that his breathing was labored. "Shall I go on, J--?" "Hush." His kiss captured her mouth, cutting off words and her thoughts. She flung her arms around his neck to hang on to her emotions already on a tailspin out of control. With gentle insistence, his kisses pulled her deeper and deeper into oblivion, creating in her the need for totally abandoning herself to this man. Lust turned to need, desire to need. The thought struck her from nowhere that he'd insisted they could only be friends and she smiled against his lips. "What is it?" He pulled back, his gaze so intense she thought she might incinerate. "This is going to make it a little more difficult to remain just friends, isn’t it?" His hands slid up her back, unhooking her bra. "Damn difficult, Lil. But what I have in mind requires being a lot more than being friends." He slid the bra down her arms, assessing her as he did and she shivered under his scrutiny. She arched a brow, following his gaze and playfully cupped herself as she watched his hands move to the snap on his pants. "More than friends?" He stopped then, narrowing his gaze. "You know what you do to me, don't you?" "I like to think the feeling is mutual." He grinned, and lifted her in his arms, turning with her as he sat on the edge of the bed. "What are you doing?" She watched with curiosity as he spread her knees apart to straddle his lap. He pulled her against him, his face inches from his. "Is that mutual enough?" The bulge straining between her legs provided all the answer she needed. 54

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She snagged the hat from his head and plopped it on hers, cupping his face in her hands as she ravaged his mouth. The searing heat of his kiss left her breathless as he trailed hot kisses down her neck. She laced her fingers through his hair wanting to experience every part of him, wanting to burn this moment in her memory She knew the risks involved, but she abandoned all reason as his tongue sizzled against the sensitive area above her breast. Warm and wet, against the cool touch of her skin, his mouth drew in the tip of her breast peaked firm at his touch. Lillian locked her fingers behind his neck to keep from toppling backwards, her body arched as his teeth gently raked over each nub. A hot current of pleasure shot through her body and she gripped his shoulders, her nails raking his flesh in effort to find release for the emotions skittering about inside. Lost in the sensation of his slow exploration, Lillian stared mesmerized at the curtains fluttering in the morning breeze, aware—as if in a dream—they mimicked what was happening to her heart. Fanning the already smoking embers deep in her belly. She kissed the soft curls on top of his head. "Jake, aren't you a bit overdressed?" Jake pulled up his gaze to hers, his eyes burning with a passion that took her aback for a brief instant. "This could spell trouble, Lil, for both of us."

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"Or immense pleasure." She grinned with lips still rosy and swollen, her cheeks tinged in a pale crimson. Her eyes were clear, bright with arousal. Jake grinned and cupped her face, crushing his mouth to hers. Frantic at first, she coaxed him into drawing out each kiss longer and more sensuous until Jake thought he would die. "I want you to know." He mumbled against the sweet taste of her petal soft skin, "That I don't do this." "You mean to tell me, Jake, that this towns leading lawman is a virgin?" He turned her to the mattress beneath him and took the hat from her head, tossing it over his shoulder. "What I'm saying is, I don't hop into bed with anyone." He saw realization of his words wash over her expression. "Me neither." Her admission as she curled her arms around his neck unleashed a part of him that would leave his reputation to the dogs. "Show me what it is you don't do, Jake." He kissed her gently, reveling in the way she molded against him. "I made you a promise." He placed another lingering kiss on her lips and followed a path of light kisses between the warm valley of her breasts, stopping briefly to suckle the perfect rosy tips. Then he leisurely moved over the silky smooth slope of her belly, tasting the subtle saltiness of her skin. "First time, Lil?" He teased, glancing up to see her eyes flutter shut as he slipped his hands beneath her hips. Carefully he drew the skinny thong over her hips and down her mile-long legs. "Lil, after today, you'll be mine. I can’t stand the thought of another man's hands on you." He kissed the soft spot on the inside of her knee, intoxicated by the scent of her warm flesh. 56

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"I've never wanted anyone, but you, Jake." She whispered, brushing her fingers over the curls on the top of his head. Urged on by a power greater than anything he'd ever desired, he eased her legs open, kissing the warmth of her inner thigh, the scent of her overwhelming his senses. Her sighs nearly undid him as he took his fill of loving her with his mouth. He steadied her hips as his tongue entered her fevered womanhood, hot and wet, ready just for him. Bold and hard, his erection strained against the confines of his pants and with every moan she titillated him, taking him closer to losing control. She stretched her arms over her head and grasped the wrought iron headboard, writhing with pleasure, lost in her bliss. Jake dug his fingers into the flesh of her hips, fighting the furious tension building between them. He wanted to be fully inside her, to watch her reach the pinnacle with him as released the dark craving clawing at his groin. Her hips rocked against him in rhythm to her inevitable release, as his tongue darted again and again to her secret spot. "Omigod, Jake!" Her body arched in a shattering climax. He sucked in a deep breath to keep from falling over the edge himself. Without warning, she sat up and grabbed his shoulders, hauling his body on top of her. Her aggressive behavior fanned the flame burning in his crotch. "Now, Lil?" He grinned, caught off guard as he raised his body above her to accommodate the insistence of her hands to unbutton his pants. The look on her face was fierce—more determined than any gunslinger he'd ever encountered. God, but he loved her unwavering focus. "Damn drive-in things—" she muttered between clenched teeth. "Drive in?" He shifted, bracing himself in helpless, aroused amazement as with lightening precision she had his pants pushed over his hips and halfway down his thighs in record time. He sprung forth, sucking in the air as his throbbing erection brushed against the core of her heat. Lil grabbed his chin and pulled his face to hers in a kiss that set his skin on fire. "Boots?" He pulled his mouth from hers, hoping like hell she wouldn’t care if they were on or off, he didn’t want to waste any time. 57

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Lillian's hand closed around him. "Later." Jake grinned settling himself between her legs. He had to admire a woman who knew what she wanted…particularly when it was the same thing he wanted. With a burning gaze holding his, she raised her knees, using the soft pads of her feet to slide over the back of his thighs, pushing his pants over his boots. "Jesus, Lil." He swallowed as a hot summer breeze blew over his naked flesh. She guided him to where their bodies kissed intimately, brought her hand to his cheek, and invited him without another word. He pushed full into her, penetrating her tightness. Lilly's barely audible gasp stopped him. "Good Lord." Reality hit him full force and he pulled back as far as her death grip around his neck would allow. "Lil? How is it possible--? I mean--Dammit, you should have said something." He fought the guilt that he'd been too much for her at once. Lillian smiled, her eyes sparkling as she brushed a shock of hair from his forehead. "And ruin what you started? No way, Jake." She shifted, wrapping her legs around his hips to allow his deeper penetration. He sighed as her snug warmth enveloped him, welcoming the intrusion of his body to a place where not a soul before him had ventured. The thought brought him great satisfaction that he would be her first—and God-willing—her last. He kissed the gentle slope of her neck, allowing her body to adjust to his and to more so to enjoy the simple bliss of their joining. Jake sought the sweet pleasure of her mouth, sensing his own tension mounting as he satiated his desire with kisses that threatened to consume them both. Lost in a euphoric daze, it was a moment before Jake realized that the steady creak in the back of his brain was the sound of the bedsprings as his hips rocked against Lilly's heat. Suffice it to say that except for the usual trials and tribulations if growing up, he was--in fact--no more experienced with women than she claimed to be with men. Truth, as is the case in most things, had exceptional timing. He wanted to reassure her that he was as green as she was, but the urgency of his eminent release held him at bay, quickening his thrusts. "Look at me, Lil." He braced himself above her, dipping to sample the succulent rosebuds beneath him. 58

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She sighed soft and low, stroking her fingers through his hair, skimming over the back of his neck as she opened her eyes. Dark emerald green, her sparkling eyes captured his heart as much as his gaze. He fell, lock, stock, and barrel deep into a chasm he was unprepared for. Caution signals blew through his head, but they would have to wait. Jake emitted a groan of pleasure as her muscles began to close tight around him. The headboard, unashamed at their coupling, smacked loud against the wall with his every lunge, yet that mattered little in lieu of the fever that threatened to consume him. Lil was fierce, clawing at his hips, grabbing his flesh as she started over the edge of her own orgasm. With every ounce of strength in his body, he teetered on the paper-thin verge of his own release. Just as he sensed Lil closing tight around him, a muscle cramp started low in the heel of his boot. "Son offa--" "OhhhJaaaake!" He covered her mouth with his, muffling her cry of passion with a searing kiss as pain shot up his calf. Jake couldn't hold back his joyous grin. Her fingernails dug into his butt as she toppled over the edge—scraping precisely across his freshly scabbed wound. Between the leg cramp and her fingernails Jake wanted to scream at the top of his lungs and he soon had that chance. An all-consuming release overtook the pain and his hot seed spilled into her. The fierce sting of his injury was lost in the rapturous moment. With a final push, he drove into her once, twice, and once again before he collapsed heaving, his warm body pressed against hers. Beneath him, he registered her skin, hot and slick against his own. Just like his fantasy, he smiled content. An awkward silence was the third partner in the bed. He swallowed hard, licking the dryness from his lips. "Lil?" He spoke against the soft curve of her shoulder. "I've got a confession of my own." She didn’t speak. His rear end where her hand still gently cupped him, burned like blazes and he wondered if she'd opened the wound. Still, for the pleasure of the moment, he'd risk it again in a heartbeat. 59

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He braced himself on his elbows. "When I said I hadn’t done this, I meant I’ve lived a pretty sheltered life. I’m a preacher’s son and well, I—lets just say that my father believes differently. The bordello is quite often the topic of my father’s sermons.” Jake searched her face, and her eyes misted over. Hadn't he satisfied her? "I guess what I'm trying to say is that I haven’t exactly led a roguish life." "Why didn’t you tell me?" "In case you didn't notice, we didn't have a lot of time for discussion." He laughed quietly. "It doesn't matter. You are an incredible lover, Jake." She kissed him soft and slow and he sensed such tenderness that he couldn’t think. If the world stopped revolving at this moment, he knew it was here he wanted to be. "Next time, we should try it without the boots." He offered the suggestion between kisses. She kissed his shoulder as she curled a lock of his dark hair around his ear. "The variety of your talents continues to surprise me." "I'm only getting started, darling.'" He arched his brow.

*** Thankfully no one seemed interested in finding out what had transpired in her room. Lillian watched Jake as he slept. The light of mid-day splayed over the skin of his bare chest in its slow, rhythmic motion. He appeared so peaceful in his slumber. She smiled at the casual way his arm rested over his forehead and how sexy the dense shadow of a beard framed his gently parted lips. Her body remembered how his hands felt sliding over her skin, so soft and gentle, unhurried and thorough, giving as much pleasure as he took. She had no idea of their future together, but she could not imagine waking and not finding him next to her. Every aspect of Jake Sloan, spirit and flesh, seemed to have been fashioned for her alone. No, the last thing she wanted to do was wake him. To do so would most likely mean he'd leave her bed and she wasn't ready for that yet. "Get your eye full yet, Miss Lilly?" He spoke quietly as a slower-than-molasses smile crept across his face. The sound of his voice alone reverberated through her as though her heart was finely tuned to its sound. 60

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"Not yet. I'm not sure I'll ever get my fill of you." She propped up on her elbow and ran her palm over his broad chest, reveling in the sinewy strength beneath her hand. "Anyone complain about the noise this morning?" He peered at her with one eye, taking her hand in his and turning it to place a soft kiss on her palm. Unable to resist playing against his former concerns, she grinned. "Several of the ladies and their guests I heard celebrated at the bar afterwards. Toasts all around, bets being paid off." She shrugged. "That sort of thing." Lillian rested her arm on his chest and peered at him, enjoying the fact that he didn't appear the least concerned. His soft chuckle warmed her heart. "I guess I ought to really be going." He turned his face toward the window and frowned. "Good lord, its past noon." He patted her hand and sat up, swinging his feet over the edge of the bed. Maybe she'd assumed more had happened between them than really had. Jake seemed perfectly at ease in his nakedness. He searched for his boots, which came off as promised. "I told Nate last night I'd be right back. I figure by now, he's already made up his mind what went on up here." She lay in bed, watching the firm muscles of his thighs bunch as he walked around the edge of the bed, imagining the strength she knew lay between them. The thought made her wet—but the man could do that to her with a single look. "And that’s a bad thing?" Jake looked over his shoulder, his hair tousled from their lovemaking. "Lil, I told you how I felt. I meant what I said." The fact that she wore no clothes was not the reason for the chill bumps running up her arms. His penetrating coffee-colored gaze however, was more than enough. "I'd like to come by a bit later to call on you." He hesitated as he buttoned up his pants. "If that’s all right by you." Lillian wanted to leap into his arms, but at the risk of appearing possessive, she simply twirled a strand of hair around her finger and glanced up at him. "Of course Jake, that would be fine by me."

***

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Lillian lit the rose-globe of the kerosene lamp and blew out the match. She hadn't heard from him the rest of the day, though she'd not heard the end of the congratulations and wishful sighs from the rest of the bordello's women. Her body felt his presence even as she tried to occupy her thoughts with cleaning the rugs, and hauling clean water to the tub in her room. She'd enjoyed a simple supper with a few of the girls and played the piano afterwards to give some venue of release for her impatience in wanting to see him. "Night, Lil." Angel gave her a reassuring smile as she turned to go up the stairs. "You sure you're okay?" Lillian wasn't sure how to answer, but she lifted her chin with a measure of confidence and returned the woman's smile. "Go on, I'll lock up." She strolled through the parlor on the main floor and wandered to the dining room, finding small ways to keep from having to go to the front door and lock it. When it occurred to her that she was going to wear a rut in the carpet, she sighed finally and turned toward the door. Maybe he'd gotten busy—the life of a Sheriff could easily be demanding and what method would he have really of contacting her? Sure, he could send Nate—unless, of course, he didn't want Nate to know about them. Lillian jerked open the frosted glass door and stepped outside onto the covered porch. She stared into the pitch-black night, its sky glittering with a million stars and she thought of her former life—safe, secure, predictable, and admittedly much lonelier. She crossed her arms over her chest, rubbing the thin material covering her upper arms and strained to hear the sound of a horse's gallop coming up the road. The shrill cry of a desert hawk pierced the silence, causing her to jump from her reverie. Her emotions swirled between desire and fear as she walked inside and closed the door behind her with a final click of the lock.

*** She dreamed that night of Jake, bits and pieces of their conversations over the past few days tossed with quick glimpses of their lovemaking, but always she saw the look on his face just before he kissed her. Her body responded to him as naturally as a song to a bird and only he could make her soar to the sky and yet make her grateful she was here on earth—with him.

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"I came as quick as I could, sorry." Jake's kisses touched her before she opened her eyes. Afraid it might be only a dream, though delicious one, she stretched out her arms to feel him first. His flesh, still cool from his night's ride covered hers still warm from the covers. Her eyes still closed, she opened to him, accepting him, wanting to connect her ethereal dream to reality. She knew him, the feel of his muscle, the taste of his mouth, the musky, male scent of his skin. His lips found hers, gently tasting, exploring as he slid effortlessly into her moist heat. His quiet sighs blended with hers, freeing the fear inside her that he wouldn’t return as promised. She was in heaven, her arms and legs wrapped around his body. Together they soared higher and higher through a dreamlike state--thrust after precious thrust-filled her heart with so much pleasure she thought it would burst. With a joyous sigh, she came with him, exploding into a thousand prisms of light. Melded together as one, they gripped each other tight as though something dire might threaten to tear them apart. Jake's breathing slowed, soft against her shoulder, he kissed her skin. "I like waking up with you in my arms." She brushed her lips across his jaw. The stubble of his unshaved skin was rough against her mouth, mixed with the dewy taste of passion on his flesh. "It's as though I can't get enough of you, Lil." He rolled over scooping her under his arm and tucking her close to his side. His chest rose in a great sigh. "You're like an addiction my body craves." Lillian chuckled. "I could only dream about one thing tonight, Sheriff. Can you guess what that was?" She raked her fingers across his chest and hugged him, kissing the strength of his muscled shoulder. "Well, I sure as heck hope it was me you were dreaming about, Lil." "No ego for you, Sheriff." She playfully teased. "Not when I walked around half the day hard enough to drive nails just thinking about you." He turned his face toward her and his dark eyes glittered in the light of the summer moon shining through the window. "You create quite a craving, Lil." "The feeling is mutual, Jake." Lil suddenly realized the doors were locked. "By the way, how'd you get into my room?" She sat up and stared at him propped on her pillow, one arm caught behind his head and looking mighty satisfied—which she guessed he probably was. 63

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"I’ve done my fair share of climbing in my day. Part of the job, you know." He rubbed his hand over his chest, pausing to scratch an itch. "Your job requires you to climb in women's windows, Jake?" "Come on back down here." He grinned as he reached for her. "After you answer me, sir." Lil pulled the sheet up around her, covering what she could manage while Jake held possession of more than half the sheets around his perfect body. "Lillian White, you ought not be thinking such wicked thoughts about me. You think I'm some Don Juan fella’ that climbs into women's bedrooms at midnight, ravishes them, and then leaves, making them wonder if it was a dream or real?" "You're avoiding the answer, Jake." His hand caressed her hip, his warm fingers dipping between her thighs. He stroked her gently, without hurry, holding her gaze, knowing he what he was doing to her "Miss Lillian, I swear to you, I have only climbed into a woman's window once in my entire life." His voice when he talked lovingly to her, and the familiarity of his touch was already starting to strengthen the notion of security in her heart, making her think of things like gardens, grandchildren, and anniversaries. She lay down beside him, his hand resting placidly between her legs. "And when was the last time you did that, Mr. Sloan?" He leaned over and kissed the tip of her nose. "About thirty minutes ago." Jake kissed again, tenderness displayed in his unhurried kisses. "It's a hell of a lot of incentive to know what kind of woman is waiting through that second story window." "Are you going to let me sleep at all tonight?" she whispered, her body melting under the expert way he seemed to know what pleased her. "Right after I play Don Juan." In a groggy state of bliss, Lil teased, "Now Jake, you won't leave me wondering if it’s real or a dream, will you?" His lips stretched into a wide grin against her mouth. "I promise you there will be no doubt in your mind, how real it will be." "Sounds like a challenge, Jake." "No ma'am, just a promise." 64

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"I like an honest man." She curled her arms around his neck as he drew her body to his. "Does that include a guy that climbs in your window in the middle of the night?" She draped her leg over his thigh. "Especially him."

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Chapter Eight

"If only your constituents could see you now, Sheriff Sloan." Lil traced her finger from his knee to his inner thigh and glanced up at him with a grin. The tepid bath had been a welcome diversion from their morning of lovemaking. Jake lifted the damp curls at the base of her neck and kissed the dewy softness and suddenly understood there were some things that a man could become addicted to She'd shown him that morning more ways of pleasure than he knew existed and she'd modeled that underwear--a thong, she called it—stating that it came with her. Frankly, he didn’t care much where it came from, but he was sure as hell glad it came with her in it. "Speaking of my constituents, there is something I wanted to talk to you about Lil." He knew the risk he was about to take could jeopardize his career, but on the other hand, he knew if he didn’t, he might risk losing Lilly. "There's a party being given in my honor on Friday evening. I'm asking permission to be your escort." "You want to take me to one of your fundraising parties?" She turned to look at him, her green eyes wide with wonder. "Oh as entertainment. Of course, you found out I dabble at playing the piano." Jake grinned. He had heard about her sitting in the saloon belting out some strange songs that no one had ever heard. "I heard a little something about that impromptu show of yours. Angel mentioned a wonderful guy named Billy Joel and you taking down a half a bottle of whiskey?" "I had some issues I needed to face. I'm better now." Lil squeezed the washcloth, watching the water sluice down her outstretched leg. Jake watched right along with her, nearly forgetting what he'd been saying. He blinked, returning to his thoughts as she lowered her leg into the warm water. 66

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"I'm glad to hear you got your issues worked out, but I really just wanted you to come as my guest." She glanced over her shoulder, those beautiful green eyes framed with soft black lashes. "Well, Sheriff, as much as I am flattered that you would like for me to join you, I am afraid that I must decline." "Why Lilly, are you being a snob?" He slid his hands around her waist, enjoying the feel of her skin, slick and wet. Snuggling close to her back, he cupped her luscious breasts in his palms. "I can't, Jake." Her breath caught as he brushed the pad of his thumb over one proud peak. Well on his way to a complete arousal, he shifted to let her know what she was doing to him. "Can't or won't?" "Jake, I have nothing to wear—besides—" She sighed and rested her head against his shoulder, as he continued to pleasure her with his massage. She lay between his legs, her arms draped lazily over his knees. "You know Lil, not that your clothes, or lack thereof, would be a problem as far as I'm concerned, but couldn't you borrow something from one of the other girls?" He kissed a ringlet of hair against her temple, laying his cheek to her shoulder, watching her expression skate between reason and bliss. "What if I said, please?" He slid his hand slow down her belly, dipping into her navel, his fingers sliding over her springy dark curls. Jake kissed her shoulder, raking his teeth gently across her silky flesh. "They all know who I am, Jake, I don't want to embarrass you." "You couldn't do that. Please, Lil."" He kissed the slope her neck as he slid his finger inside her, stroking slow and easy, wanting to watch her go over the edge. "Maybe, with sugar on it?" He teased in a whisper. "Jake, I don't—know--" Her fingers clutched his legs, her back pressed hard against his chest as her legs dropped open for him. "And berries with cream…please come with me, Lilly." He whispered against her cheek, feeling the tension build in her body, wanting to bury himself deep inside her. He turned her face to his, seeing her gaze on the verge of release. 67

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"I shouldn't--" Her words gave way to short gasps, her breath panted against his mouth. "Yes, I think you want to—" He grinned, watching her eyelids flutter shut. She nodded, capturing his mouth in a searing kiss as her sweet climax kissed his finger. Her trust with him in their lovemaking humbled him as much as thrilled him. Jake grinned as she slumped against him. "You don't play fair for a Sheriff." "Then you'll come with me?" He grinned knowing she was still hot and ready— the thought made his shaft throb with anticipation. Lil turned; sloshing water carelessly over the side and without warning impaled herself upon his rigid staff. Her arms draped lazily over his shoulders, she rode him with a slow deliberate gait, keeping hold of his gaze with her mesmerizing smile. "Only if you do the same." He crushed his mouth to hers, grasping her hips as he gave into the fierce storm of his release. "Gawdalmigggghty." Jake dropped the back of his head to the edge of the old tub, and opened one eye. "You're going to be the death of me with all your lovin', woman." "Love? Is that what we're calling this now?" He cupped her face in his hands, "I know you're the only woman that makes me feel this way, Lil." Jake picked up a cloth and squeezed it over one shoulder, following the drops with a kiss. She stretched like a satisfied cat, locking her arms around his neck. "Got a wild streak buried deep inside you, don't you Jake?" He knew more than just their bodies had joined in the last few days, at least for him. "Only one thing I want to think about being buried right now." He fisted the cloth over her other shoulder, watching the water trickle over her sweet flesh. She glanced up at him with a teasing smile, and Jake figured that Nate was going to get a good feel for what it was like to be in charge. In a brief flash, it occurred to Jake that maybe he really didn’t know where Lilly was from, but he sure as hell knew where she belonged.

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Jake told Lilly he'd be by around seven. Even though she offered to take a wagon into town herself, he insisted saying he wanted to be her escort into town like a real lady. Who could possibly argue with that? She shifted the bodice of her dress to conceal as much of her cleavage as possible. Even without the corset, her breasts managed to all but spill out of the dress, but the dress had been the collective choice of the girls who decided the other women at the dinner would be envious of the hunter green velvet and gold brocade. "I shouldn't be doing this," Lilly muttered quietly as she brushed a speck of lint from her skirt. Angel appeared at her left shoulder. "Seems your gentleman caller feels a bit different." She nodded toward where a polished black and gold surrey was sending dust clouds in its wake as it came up the lane. In the twilight, Lillian could barely make out Jake's form in the shadows of the buggy. Two dapple-gray horses careened to a stop in front of the bordello and Jake climbed across the seat with a grin as big as the Nevada sky plastered on his handsome face. "Evenin' ladies." He touched his hat with his fingertips, his gaze scanning the railing where several of the girls lined the porch awaiting his arrival. His dark eyes found her among the crowd and stopped, as though appraising her. He walked up the steps with his gaze firm on hers. He took off his hat as he approached her and Lil wanted to cry. "Just when I thought you were the most beautiful woman in the county, you go and make it the whole state." Lillian heard the quiet tittering and sighs going on behind him. She blushed. What was it that made the men of this era so gallant? "Thank you, Sheriff." She offered a slight curtsy before she realized what she was doing. "Shall we go then?" He offered her his arm, soliciting more sighs from the girls. "You'll have her home early, of course, Sheriff?" one woman called after them. "And mind you, treat her like a lady, Sheriff Sloan, "another cautioned. "You haven't been courted much, have you, Lil?" He leaned close and whispered in her ear. 69

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There was much about Lillian White's experiences that Sheriff Sloan didn't know. "Not a great deal. The girls are just teasing you, anyway." She took his hand as she climbed into the red velvet buggy seat. Lil had to smile as he glanced over his shoulder at the mass of scantily dressed women waving at him. "That’s quite a fan club you have there, Sheriff." "They've all seen my butt." Lil chuckled. "How many promising deputies can say that? Too bad women haven’t been given the right to vote just yet." He gave her a curious side glance. "Never mind." Lil grinned.

*** The night wind whistled through the steeple rock crags as they rode in silence toward town. Even though their relationship had surpassed every intimacy she'd ever known, she felt awkward, their differences seemed clearly too wide. Certain as she was that Jake Sloan was the man she was meant to be with, she could not shake the strange foreboding of this night in her heart. "You're awfully quiet tonight, Lil." He glanced at her. "You're not having second thoughts about this, are you?" Second, third, and forth, if the truth were known. Lillian straightened her shoulders, determined not to allow the timidity of her former life take precedence over Jake's invitation. After all, if he wasn't sure she would be accepted and that all would go well, he wouldn't have asked her. Would he? "Just enjoying the night, Jake. It's so beautiful and open out here." She tucked her hand in the crook of his arm, and lightly kissed his cheek. He chuckled low, "I'm glad to hear that, I was afraid maybe you were thinking this wasn't such a good idea." Lillian lifted her chin in defiance. "I have every intention of wooing your constituents, Sheriff Sloan." He wrapped his hand around hers, bringing her fingers to his lips. "I have no doubt that you will, too. Look what you did to me." An unknown fear brushed over her heart as she smiled down at their joined hands.

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Jake held out his arms, circling them around Lilly's waist as she stepped off the buggy. There was nothing he would have liked better than to take her to a secluded room of the finest hotel in town and treat her like the queen he thought she was. "A kiss for luck, Lil?" He held her close drinking in the scent of her jasminescented skin. "Right here in the street, Sheriff? Do you think that's wise?" She averted her gaze and glanced around them. Jake dropped her gently, easing her into the shadows of the buggy. "You make me lose all sense of propriety, Miss Lillian." He rested his hand on the carriage above her head, taking advantage of the privacy to nuzzle her beneath her ear. "This will have to do until later." Her skin tasted sweet as meadow flowers, dampened by the night ride. She smiled, her teeth showing white against the darkening twilight. "Perhaps we should be going Sheriff, before you make me do things that a proper lady shouldn’t do in public." Her hand slid deftly over the front of his pants as she responded with an amorous kiss. Jake stepped away realizing she was right. It didn’t take much more than the thought of her body to get him aroused. "Guess we best be getting inside." "Your public awaits, Sheriff." Lil sidled past him, trailing a finger over his chest. "I can wait for as long as it takes to get you in private." Jake shifted his suede jacket, buttoning it up the front, in hopes of concealing what she'd managed to do to him with a simple kiss. If all went well tonight, he would follow through with his plan to take Lillian back to the hotel room he'd reserved for them There he hoped that she would accept his offer to spend the rest of her life at his side. He followed her up the front steps to the mayor's mansion, mesmerized by the gentle sway of her hips in that dress. He was sure it would also get its share of envious glances from the other women present, not to mention the admiration of the men. Jake stepped beside her as they reached the beveled-glass front door He glanced at Lil seeing her expression stoic and firm. She looked like she was about to face a firing squad. "How do I look?" She spoke to him, but her attention was clearly nailed to the front door.

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"Like a beautiful painting." He realized at that moment, that he truly meant every word. He'd come to see beyond her beauty and admired the woman inside who faced adversity and challenge without fear of what others thought of her. The door swung open and Rufus, the mayor's manservant, stepped to the side ushering them into the foyer. The mayor and his wife rushed down the short hallway and grabbed Jake's hand, cranking it up and down like a water pump. "Everyone accepted our invitation to meet the brilliant man who is to become our District Sheriff." The older woman worked her way between Jake and Lillian. She clamped onto his arm, dragging him down the hall toward the dining room, completely ignoring Lillian. Jake smiled politely as he extracted himself from the grip of his overly enthusiastic host. "I'd like you to meet my guest for this evening." He stepped away from her and turned to Lil, holding out his hand to her. "Miss Lillian White, I'd like you to meet Mr. and Mrs. Frederick Clancy. Mr. Clancy is the m—" "Yes, Deadwater Gulches mayor." Lil held her hand out in friendly greeting as her gaze moved to the woman standing behind him. "And this must be the lovely woman that everyone talks about…at least, that’s what Jake tells me." Jake placed his hand on Lilly's back and gave it a playful pinch. "I'm so pleased to make your acquaintance." Lil seemed to ignore the fact that the mayor had yet to accept her hand and that the look on Rosemond Clancy's face was blatantly disapproving. The mayor's wife smiled, her expression pinched, glancing nervously at her husband's focus on Lillian's bodice. "Have you and Sheriff Sloan known each other long?" "Not intimately." Lillian smiled at the woman with pure candor. Jake ducked his head to suppress his grin. A brief, but awkward silence followed. Jake cleared his throat. "What Miss White means to say is that we, that is, our jobs, uh…have allowed us to become better acquainted." He ran his hand over the back of his neck, nervous to get past the introduction stage. The mayor, his gaze still fixed up on Lilly, licked his lips. "Well, I say that’s wonderful. All of us here in Deadwater ought to get to know each other." His wife jabbed him with her elbow. 72

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"For the betterment of the community, of course." Lillian smiled, glancing at Jake. "Of course Mayor. You, and of course, you Mrs. Clancy are most welcome anytime at the Sweet Magnolia." "Why thank you." The mayor's chest puffed like a proud peacock spreading its feathers as his wife covered her mouth in surprise. "Dinner is served, sir." Rufus spoke eloquently as he stepped from the dining room. From inside, Jake could hear the murmurs of the other guests. He hoped that his father wasn't among them. As the mayor offered his arm to Lil, Mrs. Clancy rushed forward between them, possessively taking her husband's arm. Jake held Lilly's arm preventing her from following. "We'll be just a moment." "Very well son, but don't be long, you have some anxious voters in that next room." He gave Jake a knowing grin. Jake waited until they'd gone and turned Lilly to face him. "You be good." He pointed a finger at her nose. Her brow arched as she stepped forward and took the tip of his finger in her mouth, drawing it slow and easy through her ruby red lips. "Aren't I always, Sheriff?" she whispered. Her voice tempted him almost as much as thoughts of what he suspected she wore under that dress. It was his goal to find out before the end of the night, the answer to that very question. Jake's mouth went dry, while his body temperature experienced a flash fire. He removed his hat and ran his hand over his brow. "I have a little something for you." He turned and hung his hat on the polished brass coat tree, wishing like hell that this part of their night was over. "Yes, I know Jake, but I thought we were going to wait." She offered a sly smile. For a good thirty seconds, he considered grabbing his hat and Lil and escaping into the night. Yet he knew that he wanted this night to bode well for Lil. He wanted her to feel as though she belonged. "It's a necklace, Lil. I wanted you to wear it tonight. I wanted you to know that I am proud to have you at my side." Lil took a step back and he thought her eyes misted over. She glanced away fingering the red amulet she always wore around her neck. 73

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"It's not a bribe, Lil, nor payment for anything. If you'd rather not accept it, I'll understand." Jake shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other. She shook her head, her gaze still to the floor. "No, Jake, it's not that." He touched his finger to her chin, lifting her gaze to his. "Will you wear it for me then?" "All right, I'll wear it, but it's important that I don't lose this necklace." She reached up and undid the clasp and dropped the amulet into her satin satchel. Jake took a deep breath as he pulled the gold necklace from his coat pocket. He'd commissioned it from the jeweler in town and spent most of a month's wages in the process. It wasn't a ring, but he hoped she would find the sentiment in its value until he could afford a proper engagement ring. "Turn around." He touched her shoulder, turning her toward the oval mirror that hung over the elegant marble-topped entry table. This was a big step he realized, he hoped for the both of them. He placed the necklace around her neck, watching her reaction in the mirror. At first, he thought she wasn't pleased. With careful deliberation, she brought her hand to her throat, touching the gold shamrock where it lay just above the swell of her breasts. In the center, sparkled a small emerald that twinkled in the light of the kerosene lamps. "You're my lucky Lil." Jake placed his hands on her shoulders and stared at her image in the mirror. She'd yet to utter a sound. "I know it's not much. But the gold is from here, in the mines. I asked Simms, the jeweler to make it with something that sparkled as beautiful as your green eyes." A cold sweat broke out on his upper lip as her gaze in the mirror lifted to his. She turned without warning and flung her arms around his neck and kissed him with such force that he stumbled backward, bumping against the wall. That was going to create some conversation on the other side. "You like it, then?" he whispered when she let him up for air. "It's beautiful, Jake. I'll wear it always." "Sheriff Sloan and—Miss White, the mayor requested I remind you that your guests are waiting." Rufus stood with his back straight, and his gaze held discreetly to the opening through which was the dining room. 74

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"Sorry to keep them waiting, Rufus." Jake grabbed Lilly's hand and grinned. There was little else on his mind than to enjoy the evening in the company of the lovely woman beside him.

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Chapter Nine

"The very idea of bringing someone like her…" "It's deplorable…" Lillian shifted in the chair at the dining room table. She'd been seated across from Jake. In proper fashion, she surmised, their hosts had done their best to mix the seating to provide stimulus for conversation, or to separate her from Deadwater's finest. It appeared to Lillian however, that no matter where she'd been seated, the reaction to her presence would be the same. She kept her gaze on her plate, toying with the peas with her fork. "Sheriff Sloan, if elected to the Deputy Marshall's position, or shall I say—when, elected to this position, what do you intend to do about keeping the new towns like Deadwater, productive and clean places suitable for new families coming in from the east?" A quiet titter of laughter bubbled from two women seated at the far end of the table. Their napkins quickly covered their faux pas, but the damage was already done. Her gaze met Jake's across the table, hoping to derive some semblance of encouragement. "Well, Mr. Mayor." He cleared his throat and glanced away. "I'd like to think that Deadwater already exemplifies a healthy, productive town. Open minded and growing every day. I've seen it now as Sheriff every day and I can't think of what changes need to be made that would make our town appear any more enticing to new comers." An obvious cough by Mrs. Clancy garnered the attention of most of those at the table. Lillian felt her confidence slipping away by the moment. She wanted to remind the females seated at this tête-à-tête that many of their husbands were frequent guests of the Sweet Magnolia. Sometimes it was simply for a friendly game of poker, but on occasion it was for the company of the women. Still, it was policy of the Magnolia to keep client visits confidential. 76

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Lillian bit her lip, sensing the heat rising in her cheeks as the silence shrouded whatever good was intended from the conversation. It was evident to some, that the Sweet Magnolia, and the woman who represented it, were nothing more than a house of ill-repute with tainted women and devious undertakings. Lilly threw caution to the wind, and lifted her water glass to her lips, sipping gingerly before she spoke. "The Magnolia was planning on a substantial offering to the Church Women's fund for orphaned children this year." A gasp emitted from the woman next to her. Lillian put down her glass and gently patted the woman's back. "I highly doubt that the Church women will require your help, Miss White. We've done quite well up to now with our raffle and bake sales." The woman to Lillian's left interjected with an air of snobbishness. "Are you implying that the Magnolia's money isn't good enough for charity?" She knew she was offering up a challenge to these small-minded townspeople. Hopefully though, it would not have an adverse affect on Jake's political reputation. "Well, I never--" Probably not, Lillian smiled, and realized why the woman’s husband found his way to the Sweet Magnolia every Thursday night. "I simply think that if we are going to progress as a community, then all of its members should become socially aware and involved." Jake offered her a grin, raised his glass, and nodded in agreement. "I'm not sure that the business the Magnolia partakes in can actually be referred to as either productive, or community-minded." Mrs. Clancy spoke with an icy tone. At least, Lillian thought, the woman doesn’t have the gall to look at me when she knows her husband makes visits to the Magnolia. "Now dear, Miss White is our guest--" The mayor attempted to harness the political and moral monster he'd unleashed. "It's true. Those women are--" One women glanced sheepishly around the room. "Well, being a lady, I cannot say what it is I think." Lillian's spine stiffened. She saw Jake take a deep breath and place his glass firm on the table. As much as she'd have loved him to ride to her aid, this dinner was to his benefit, and to his future. It was clear that those in the room with the exception of Jake 77

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and Lil, were of like minds and she was most certainly a stain on the tablecloth of their evening. Lil stood, holding her hand up to Jake, insisting he stay seated. "It is apparent that at least for a few more years, the town of Deadwater will go on pretending that the women on the edge of town aren't really people, trying to make a living the best they can." She scanned the horrified expressions of the men and women staring at her. "They want the same things you do—family, a home, security, dental benefits—" Shock gave way to curious glances at one another, but Lillian did not let that stop her. "These women have feelings and emotions. They have hopes and dreams of a better life. Your small-minded perspective and reluctance to allow anyone into your circle that does not dress, think, and act like you will be what will detour any manner of progress for Deadwater Gulch." She pushed her chair in and reached for her wine, swallowing the remainder in one gulp. She returned the goblet to the table with a decisive smack. "Mr. Clancy, Mrs. Clancy, I wish to thank you for this otherwise enlightening evening, but I regret to inform you that I can no longer abide sitting in the presence of such close-minded, self-serving bureaucrats." She glanced at Jake across the table, noting the shock on his face was as bad as the rest. Could she really blame him? After all, he'd brought her there, hoping that in doing so, it would change the view that his constituents had of her, and that of the Magnolia. Sadly, his intentions were as fleeting as the dawn. In all likelihood, it would be several years more of struggle for the women of the Magnolia, before they would be respected for what they could achieve with their earnings. Now was not the time, nor place to try to educate. Life, eventually, would be their teacher, and many bordellos throughout history would come to be known for the charitable works they funded without public acknowledgement. "I'll see you back." Jake spoke quietly as he stood. "I'll thank you just the same, Sheriff, but I'm sure the mayor and your friends here would feel much more comfortable if I was to leave—alone." She moved quickly toward the door. "If I may take the buggy?" She spoke directly to Jake who stood caught between gallantry and his future. Lillian knew which one she wanted him to choose, and so she made it easy. "You belong here, Jake. Please stay." 78

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Jake opened his mouth to speak, his brow creased with his frown. "Thank you, one and all, for opening my eyes." She brought her gaze back to meet Jake’s. "I wish you a wonderful future, Sheriff Sloan." She left, choosing not to look back to see if he followed, but she knew what she would have to say, if he did. Thankfully she reached the buggy and was halfway down the road when she noticed the light from the open doorway. With a glance over her shoulder, she could see Jake’s silhouette standing in the open door. Lil turned away, hoping that when the evening was over, he would find his way back to the Magnolia.

*** Lillian dropped the curtain from her fingers, stiff from holding it back to peer into the dark night as she waited for Jake to show. Deep inside, she had a feeling he wouldn’t come to her tonight, and finally resigned to herself that perhaps it was better this way. Fresh tears rolled down her face, and Lil swiped them away with her robe sleeve. She turned from the window, exhausted from the emotional trauma of the day. Crumpled in a heap on the floor lay the beautiful green dress she'd taken such great preparation in readying just for his view. She reached down, drawing it into her arms and tears broke free at the thought of his expression when he first saw her. So much different from the one she was left with at the unplanned end to her evening. Carefully she laid it over the dressing screen, lifted the globe of the kerosene wall lamp, and blew gently across its surface. She had to make the attempt twice before she could manage to control her tears well enough to blow out the flame. Pitched into darkness, Lil fumbled her way to the bed and removed her robe. She'd worn the special leopard print underwear for him tonight, knowing that he found it sexy, but she felt nothing close to that as she crawled sobbing under the covers. She pressed her face into the soft security of her pillow, breathing in the lingering scent of Jake's skin. Her heart lay heavy inside her chest, desperate to turn back time, wondering if she'd only handled things differently if they would be together now. Deep inside, she knew that had she conceded to their prejudice she would have compromised her integrity. Ironically, life had brought her full circle back to the realization that regardless of what people saw on the outside, it was ultimately her own sense of self-worth that remained the most important. 79

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As she lay on her side in the dark, Lil gazed bleary-eyed at the shadows of the curtains dancing in the pale moonlight. Exhausted from crying, weary from heartache, she drifted to sleep with the scent of Jake next to her cheek.

*** The clatter of metal scraping metal woke her from a fitful sleep. Lil sat up with a start, her heart beating a cadence against her chest. She blinked several times, scanning the room and was startled when the three-legged cat pounced up on the end of her bed. It was as though nothing had changed; that time itself had stopped. But she knew better, deep in Lil's soul she knew she'd been changed. Lillian glanced down beside her hand and discovered the book she'd borrowed from the library. Instantly, she grabbed for the necklace at her throat and found only a gold shamrock, with a tiny emerald set in its center. Her mind blurred between reality and a foggy recollection of another time and place. One where she believed that she'd found more happiness than she could imagine. And yet, somehow, here she was, back in her apartment. Was it all just a dream? She picked up the book, concluding that she must have been reading it before she dozed off. But so much of it seemed real. The furry tri-pod feline, brushed her bare leg as though happy to see her. As though she'd been away for a long time, but that of course, was impossible—wasn't it? Lillian flipped through the pages of the book, noting that the woman featured in the book had become a legend in the old west. Years after, records from books written in Lucky Lil's own hand revealed that much of the bordellos wealth was distributed in secret to many charities and business ventures. It was this discovery that led the mayor to investigate further how best to honor the strange woman after her mysterious disappearance. Lilly's gaze focused intent on the next paragraph. "Legend says that Miss Lillian disappeared one night and her body was never found." Lillian stared at the words, unable, perhaps unwilling, to grasp the incomprehensible. "Though an intense search was headed up by a posse of the town Sheriff and several volunteers, it was finally concluded that she'd traveled back east to seek her fortune." 80

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Lillian carefully closed the book. Photographic snatches of images flashed rapid in her mind as she tried to grasp any of them, trying to make sense of what she thought happened. Her efforts served only to bring on a giant headache and nausea. She needed something for both. She scratched the cat's chin, and peered at him cautiously. "Are you hungry, Wyatt?" It had to be Saturday morning, she knew because the garbage man always came on Saturday morning with his symphony of rattling cans. Lil scooted off the edge of the bed, and stumbled to the bedroom door, snatching her robe from the hook on the back. She needed to good cup of strong tea. Perhaps that would help to clear the fog in her brain. Still, she had the strangest urge to lace it with whiskey and hunt down her old Billy Joel albums.

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Chapter Ten

For the past few weeks, Lilly had dreamt of a man. Not particularly unusual, she'd often had dreams, like all women do. This man though, with his dark eyes and a grin just this side of illegal, touched her to the core. In her dreams, his presence seemed so strong that she awoke many times aware of a man's scent on her pillow. In her effort to reason where she had no viable answers, Lilly came to the conclusion that the shamrock necklace she wore must have been the same one in the filigree box. She searched the box inside and out, hoping to find an address of where she could return it, but there was nothing. Between time and work, her memory of it, and her dreams, eventually faded to the point where she couldn't remember where she got the necklace.

*** "I'll be waxing the front entrance if you need me, Miss White." Lillian glanced up from staring at the box in her hand. The library janitor's brilliant blue eyes sparkled at her. There were times he looked like a cast-off between Einstein and Willy Nelson, with his long silver braids and wise-looking eyes. But he was a good man and treated Lilly like a daughter. "Thanks, Burt. It's almost closing and I don't think anyone is here." Lilly removed her reading glasses from the perch on her nose, and rubbed a finger over her eyebrow. "I just have a few books left to put away." "Headache, Miss White?" Burt gave her a fatherly smile. "I've not been sleeping well, that's all, Burt." "You might try a shot of whiskey in your tea, tonight." He shuffled toward the lobby, scooting his pail and broom in front of him, the methodic squeak of the wheels echoing in the vast dome of the front foyer. 82

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Lilly opened her book bag to drop the box into its depths and stopped, noting the book about Lucky Lil still lay at the bottom of the bag. Lil plucked it from its crowded depths and stared at the cover. The thought ran fleetingly across her mind that she'd never told Burt about her nightly tea ritual. Her focus drawn back to the book, the faded black and white photo of the woman mesmerized her. There was a look of confidence, almost defiance on her face. The dress she wore was elegant, a darker color probably, but Lilly couldn’t tell. Her gaze narrowed as she tried to determine the shape of the necklace the woman wore, but the picture was old, she couldn’t make it out. Lil sighed, rubbing her hand over the back of her neck. She knew the tension was indicative of the stress and for her own sake perhaps it was time to move on, away from her obsession with this book. This life between dream and reality was serving no other purpose than to make her aware that whoever this man in her dreams was, he did not exist on any plane other than her imagination. "Like I said Burt," she muttered quietly, "there are no cowboys left to ride off into the sunset with." Lillian took one last look at the book in her hand and made the decision she should have made weeks ago. It was time to shelve these fantasies where they belonged. Her heels clicked a rapid tattoo as she walked without haste to the farthest corner of the library. There in the last aisle, on the top shelf of the historical section, was where the book belonged. She scooted the rolling ladder to the area, and glanced at the author's name for the first time. Rosemond Clancy. Though the woman's name struck a familiar cord, Lilly brushed it away, determined not to dwell on conjecture or her imagination any longer. She climbed the two short steps to reach the top shelf, making a note to come back later with a dust rag and some wood polish. "Is there a Ms. Lillian White back here?" The low-timbered sound of a man's voice resounded in the silence of the near empty library Lil wondered if Burt was still around. Not that anything very exciting ever happened in the suburbs of Deadwater. "Burt said I'd find you back here." That answered that question. Lillian returned her attention to shelving the book, blowing a bit of dust from the shelf in the process. Murky clouds of dirt particles retaliated causing her to squeeze her eyes shut for a moment as they settled. She turned 83

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her face away to avoid the grit getting her eyes, her focus landing on the lovely stained glass window next to her. The rays of the setting sun shone through the faded colors, but the image of the dark green, twined vines and large white magnolia blossoms sparkled in the evening sun. "All this dust sort of gives new meaning to the historical section." The man's voice startled her and she dropped the book. It landed with a loud bang on the old wood floor, sounding like a gunshot. Lil stepped down the ladder, stooping to retrieve the book. Another hand met hers and her heart skipped a beat. There was a familiarity in his touch and a shiver ran up her spine. "I believe you dropped this." The man took her hand and lifted the book from the floor with the other. "And I believe you left this behind." He drew the blood red amulet from his pocket and laid it in on the book. "I found it in your purse." Lillian stared at the necklace, time and emotions she'd kept at bay flooded her heart. She had yet to look upon the man’s face standing before her, but memories of his passionate embrace crystallized with great clarity in her mind. Afraid, she hesitated, hoping this wasn't a dream, hoping she hadn't fallen off the ladder and hit her head. For all that was in her, she prayed that he was real. Cautious, Lil lifted her gaze to look at the man's face. There was no mistake he was the same man in her dreams, though now dressed in a suit and tie, instead of a cowboy's duster. "You're here, but how—" The urge to kiss him senseless came an instant before he drew her into his arms, crushing his mouth to hers. Captured in his embrace, Lilly sought to touch him, to verify that he was not a figment of her imagination, that he was indeed, flesh and blood. She tugged his suit jacket over his shoulders, needing to know more. "How did you—?" Lilly couldn't touch his hair and face enough, wanting to prove he was real. She could barely breathe for his heated kisses. "I see you haven't lost your penchant for unruly behavior, Miss White." His kisses were warm and wet, skimming down the side of her neck as he deftly unbuttoned her blouse. In a fevered pitch Lilly grabbed his shirt and yanked it open, sending tint buttons clattering across the wood floor. She slid his bolero tie over his head. "Is it really you, 84

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Jake?” She grabbed his face, kissing his eyelids, breathing deep the scent of his skin. "I though you were a dream. I thought I was going crazy." His hands found the hem of her skirt and she wiggled her hips, aiding in his mission to feel his hands smooth over her flesh. "You've still got this?" He leaned back, his finger hooked on the string of her leopard thong. Pleasure shone in his dark eyes. "I have more than one pair." Lilly grappled with his belt, unable to deny the desperate need growing inside her. "Then I want to see every one of them on you," he growled low as he nipped at her lip, teasing her with anticipation. Lilly's heart soared. She didn't understand what possible cosmic force had made this possible, but she didn’t want to second-guess this exquisite bliss. "Where, how did you—?" Her question ended with a satisfied moan as his tongue mated with hers. He leaned his forehead to hers, his breathing shallow from passion. "Can we talk about this later? I've got to have you, Lil. I've been out of my mind looking for you." His breath hot, sweet, and smelled of cinnamon. Lilly's held his predatory gaze as he eased her back against the bookshelves. She spread her arms, resting them atop the shelves as he took pleasure in reacquainting himself to her breasts, his mouth mastering every jolt sent straight to her core. "Jake," she could barely get his name out through the dryness in her throat. If she didn’t have him soon, she feared he might disappear. He stood, gently kissing her as she unzipped his slacks and tugged them carefully down his muscular thighs. There was one last validation that what had happened between them was not a dream. She splayed her hands over his butt, feeling his muscles clench at her touch until her fingers skimmed over a scar. She didn’t know how or why he was there, but it was Jake and that was all that mattered. "Did I mention those heels do great things for your already killer legs, Lil." He held her gaze as he untied the delicate strings on each of her hips. Lil parted her legs just so, and the thong dropped to the floor. Jake glanced down and then lifted his gaze to hers. Night after night, in the seclusion of her dreams, she'd tortured herself with the memory of his lovemaking. It was nothing by comparison to his skills in reality. 85

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Jake's hand grasped her thigh and with gentle care lifted it around his waist. Thick and swollen, he nudged against her pulsating heat. Slick, she welcomed him, grabbing his shoulders to brace herself as he pushed deeper, filling her soul as she held his smoky gaze. "My sweet, sweet Lil." He kissed her slow and thorough, ending with a playful laugh and that doubled her joy. "It sure as hell is great to see you again." He held her gaze, mischief sparkling in his dark eyes as he grinned. "You aren't going to scream are you?" "There's no one here but Burt." Lilly held his face, kissing him between his slow and thorough thrusts. If this was a dream, she didn't want to ever wake up. "Oh Jake, I've missed you." "Lord Lil, I can't begin to tell you—how long I've looked for—Lil, there's just one thing I have to ask you." His pace quickening, he grabbed her other leg, securing her around his waist Lil held onto the shelves, her body in some cataclysmic wonder that she could love do deeply. "Oh lord, what? Anything Jake…anything." Her mind danced in a euphoric state of delirium, her body moving in perfect union with his. He stopped, resting full within her and ran his tongue over his lips before he spoke, his breath coming in short pants. "Marry me?" "Oh yes, oh Jake, yes!" Tears rolled down Lilly's face and she nodded, responding to his amorous kiss. "Good, that’s settled." He grinned as his thrusts came hard and fast, and Lilly held firm to his shoulders, lost in the bliss of his penetration. "Tomorrow…high noon…the courthouse, " he spoke, the words chopped as pumped into her with urgent need. "No more waiting—" Jake's fingers dug into her flesh as he captured her mouth, her tears mixing with the taste of his hard kiss. "No more waiting," she whispered against his soft lips and crashed into him, as his hot seed spilled into her, the past and the future merging into one. She held him tight as the ripples of pleasure subsided, leaving only the sound of their combined heavy breathing. Pressed against his chest, her legs wrapped secure around him, Lil circled her arms around his neck. She was home. 86

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The clang of the old grandfather clock in the library's main entrance resonated through the empty hallways, signaling the close of another day. Burt glanced up from his solitary cleaning and smiled at the orange ball of the sun setting in the western sky. "There's your lovely sunset, Miss Lilly." He turned the lock and flipped over the closed sign on the front door. "Here's wishing you and your cowboy a lifetime of riding off into them."

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About the Author

Pamela Johnson, writing as Amanda McIntyre, is multi-published in several romance genres and non-fiction works, as well as being a columnist. She is the recipient of numerous awards, finalist positions, nominations, including her feature on television and the Romantic Times Cover Model Pageant, Midwest Book Reviews feature book, RTR's Reviewers Choice, a Dorothy Parker nominee, 2003 Romance Studio CAPA Award winner, finalist for 2004 CAPA. Love Romances May 2005 Rising Star. Her multi-author non-fiction book, "Crumbs in the Keyboard" about the challenges women face in writing, generated over $2500 to benefit the Center for Women and Families in Louisville, Ky. and raise the awareness of domestic violence in our world. Visit Pamela's website is www.pamelajohnson.net Under the pen name of Amanda McIntyre, she weaves multi-faceted stories of sensual passion and romance. Told from her ethereal spirit, her stories draw you into a world where reality is seduced by the surreal. Join Amanda in her world of heroes, myths, and legends. www.amandamcintyre.net You can subscribe to her newsletter at. [email protected]

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