Hearts and Flowers

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  2   

Chapter One  “I

DON’T really know why I’m here.”

Jesse shrugged slightly, uncomfortable under the weight of the rather cold eyes that watched him so carefully. “I suppose you hear that a lot, though?” “Often enough.” She nodded her head, stereotypical glasses sliding down her nose. “How do you feel about seeing a Therapist, Mr. Pearce?” Did she give the word the capital letter or did he? Jesse couldn’t help squirming in the soft cushion of his chair. Shit! This is what he didn’t want, this feeling like a little boy under his mother’s eye. He hadn’t enjoyed it when he was a little boy and he certainly didn’t enjoy it now. He let his gaze wander around the expensively furnished office rather than look at the woman sitting in the chair in front of him. She was younger than Jesse and attractive enough, but like the office there was a chilly edge to her that he found unnerving. “I’m not sure, and call me Jesse, please,” he prevaricated, licking his lips nervously. “I think you are, Mr. Pearce. Go ahead and tell me.” There was a brief pause and a professional smile. Jesse supposed it was meant to be reassuring, but it was anything but.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  3    “Uncomfortable,” he mumbled. Christ, this kind of on the spot pressure was killing him; it’s why he was a CPA, not a stand-up comic, for heaven’s sake! He always needed time to go and stew, to process. How the hell was he supposed to know what he was feeling at the very moment he was feeling it? “Because I’m a Therapist?” Fuck, he hated that kind of circular crap and there was that damn capital letter again. “Because you’re a woman,” he blurted out finally. He wasn’t sure that was really the reason, but it sounded better than saying “because you look like a dried up, judgmental old bag and no way in hell am I telling you anything about myself”. “Ah.” She nodded again. “Based on your age, I can understand you might have difficulty relating to a woman.” “You do?” Jesse looked at her suspiciously. He wasn’t that much older than she was. She didn’t have to look so damn smug. “It’s quite common with men of your generation,” she smiled as she briskly replied, but Jesse noted there wasn’t a trace of warmth or compassion to be seen. “I’ve learned not to take offense. Luckily we have some excellent men on staff. Let me give you a referral.” Jesse left the rather oppressive office, gratefully clutching the slip of paper in his hand as he let his feet quickly find their way down the tiled hallway. He wasn’t sure if he should be relieved or insulted.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  4    ***

IT was a short drive back to the office, and Jesse hurried into the towering glass and steel building seeking the shelter and comfort of his familiar space. This had been a difficult trip outside of his comfort zone, and even with a new appointment scheduled, he wasn’t sure he was ready to try again. He nodded curtly to his assistant as he rushed past, briefly noticing as he did so that the curly-haired young man wouldn’t meet his gaze. Well, it wouldn’t be the first time Jesse had made him nervous. Finally. Jesse gave a grateful sigh as he closed the door to his office and leaned his back against the cool surface of the wood. What had he been thinking to let his sister talk him in to this? Why would he even think he would be able to let his guard down enough to share his inner turmoil? Because you’re so fucking desperate! his inner voice mocked. You’re tired of trying to meet someone’s expectations only to find you’ve disappointed them once again. Giving himself a shake, Jesse sat down behind the desk, glumly eyeing the stack of pink phone messages that stood out on the gleaming surface and the blinking light on his phone that indicated even more waited. At least business was good, he thought as he began shifting through the files that were carefully stacked on his desk for review. Thank heavens for tax season. There was no time to think, no time to be lonely.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  5    ***

HOURS later, Jesse placed his reading glasses on some papers and wiped a hand over his face. He hated to do it but he was going to have to tell MacKenzie, MacKenzie’s managing partner that they needed to do a complete audit on the firm’s books. The signs were all there; skillfully hidden, but still visible to his experienced eye. Something wasn’t quite right with the firm’s accounts. The only flaw was the firm’s accountant was also a MacKenzie. Nothing like stirring up a bit a trouble within the family ranks, but then that was one of reasons he was paid so well. As he rubbed his eyes again, Jesse wondered if Dennis had made a fresh pot of coffee. Rather than buzzing for a cup to be brought in, he thought a stretch and a brief walk might do him some good. Jesse yawned as he stood, stretching his hands toward the ceiling and enjoying the pull on his muscles. He needed to make time to go to the gym tonight. He had missed his last couple of nights and his slot in the ropes would be rescheduled if he missed another. He heard voices as he approached his office door and frowned briefly. Dennis was a good enough assistant but he spent far too much time socializing. Jesse was going to have to speak to him again, no matter how much he would prefer not to. There was another noise Jesse didn’t recognize, some strange little … whimpers? Is that what he heard? Jesse sighed with exasperation and opened the door to see just what was going on now. He stepped out into the open area and gasped as his foot hit a wet patch on the marble tile. His arms windmilled for balance and he thudded into the wall as he struggled to keep from falling.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  6    “What the…” “Oh my God!” Dennis’s curly head popped up from underneath his desk. “Mr. Pearce, are you okay?” “Yeah,” Jesse muttered as he stepped away from the wall and straightened his tie. “Why is there a wet spot on the tile?” “Uhm … yeah. Sorry about that. I was just getting something to clean it up. Won’t take me but a minute.” The young man looked nervously down below his desk again and back up at Jesse. “Is there something I can bring you?” “I just wanted a cup of coffee,” Jesse grumbled. Now he had to apologize for walking around his own office? “Why don’t you go back to your desk? I’ll bring it in and then clean up the floor.” “You don’t have to do that, Dennis. Just call for one of the maintenance staff.” Jesse looked quizzically at his assistant. He knew he had a tendency to be short, but most times he really did try to work around his instinctive lack of cordiality. Was that a word? Look at that, one visit to the shrink and he was already questioning himself. “Really, it’s no problem,” the young man babbled, practically shooing Jesse back towards his door. “Won’t take me but a minute.” Jesse paused outside his office as he realized Dennis was repeating himself. “Is everything okay?” he asked hesitantly. He wasn’t normally

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  7    prone to asking such things but this appeared to be his day for stepping outside the box. Panicked brown eyes swiveled up to meet his. “Fine! Everything’s fine!” It was more than obvious that everything wasn’t. The noise was soft and low but even so Jesse heard it. There it was, that small, almost whimpering sound again. “Did you hear that?” he asked Dennis, looking over the young man’s shoulder. “What? No! I didn’t hear a thing.” Even as the denial fell from the young man’s lips the small sound came again. “It sounds almost like a child.” Jesse’s curiosity was roused and he pushed past Dennis and began looking carefully around the office. “Don’t be silly…” Dennis began, only to stop when a glance from the piercing blue eyes skewered him where he stood. Shit! he muttered under his breath as he watched his employer walk around the office. He was in for it now. As Jesse walked near Dennis’s desk he heard the noise again, louder this time. With a grunt he knelt down, looking up to see his assistant cover his eyes with his hand as Jesse pulled a small box towards him. The movement startled the box’s occupant and Jesse fell back on his rear as a small, furry creature leapt towards the sides and attempted to lick Jesse’s nose with an eager pink tongue.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  8    “It’s a puppy!” Jesse said in amazement as he reached in and picked up the wriggling ball of golden fur. Soft whines and yips greeted his action as the small bundle hurtled himself toward Jesse in a frenzy of tail wagging and licking. “I’m really sorry, Mr. Pearce,” Dennis confessed, his words tumbling out in a rush almost as frenzied as the puppy’s tail wagging. “I found it out by the dumpster when I was having a smoke and I just couldn’t leave it there and I know I shouldn’t have brought it up here and I’m really, really sorry….” “Breathe, Dennis.” Jesse held the puppy up in the air, bringing him to his face and away again, much to the pleasure of the small pup. “Who’s a good boy, then? Who’s a good baby?” Dennis stared in amazement as his usually dour and humorless employer suddenly morphed into a smiling puddle of puppy goo. “So that’s puppy piddle I slid in, eh?” Jesse looked pointedly at Dennis. “What?” Dennis replied dazedly as he continued to look around for his boss instead of the stranger that had somehow taken his place. “Yeah, uh, sorry about that.” “So you’ve said.” Jesse tucked the bundle of fur under one arm and rose effortlessly to his feet. “What do you plan on doing with him?” “Is it a him?” Dennis asked with sudden curiosity, the question distracting him from the flexing of his employer’s taut quadriceps.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  9    Jesse just gave him another look. “Well, I didn’t exactly get a chance to check these things out!” Dennis began defensively. “I was too busy trying to … to….” “Hide him from me,” Jesse helpfully finished his sentence. “…hide him from you.” Dennis sat back down at his desk, shoving the small box out of the way with his foot with a sigh. “I can’t keep pets at my apartment, but I couldn’t leave him outside in this weather. I’m thinking I’ll run an ad.” Jesse stroked the puppy a few more times, enjoying the solid warmth beneath his hands and trying not to think about the fact that he hadn’t touched anything or anyone that soft and warm in far too long before handing him over to Dennis. “He’s a fine fellow. Someone should be glad to take him off your hands.” Dennis took the puppy carefully and looked up at his employer. “So, is it okay if I keep him here until I find a taker?” “Only for a few days.” Even as Jesse wondered where his common sense had taken off to, he found himself smiling at the picture Dennis made holding the wriggling puppy. “We are a tax office, not a kennel. Just be sure to keep him out of the way when clients or the big boss show up.” “You bet!” Dennis promised excitedly.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  10   

Chapter Two  “DENNIS!” Jesse yelled for his assistant without looking up from the figures he was currently running an adding machine tape on. Yes, he had computer programs that would do the task for him, but sometimes he just preferred a little bit of old-fashioned hands-on work. “Yes, Mr. Pearce.” Dennis stood in the doorway to the office, looking around the floor anxiously without trying to be too obvious about it. “He’s down here.” Jesse gestured with his chin to where the puppy was currently attached to Jesse’s leg, busily occupied in a festive game of “get the pants cuff”. Dennis hurried over and tried to pick up the puppy that refused to let go of Jesse’s pants. “I’m really sorry about this, Mr. Pearce.” He gave another gentle tug on the fat hindquarters of the dog that didn’t seem to mind this new game, stretching the cuff of Jesse’s pants away from his ankle and shaking his furry little head until the ears flopped about. “You’ve said that, Dennis,” Jesse sighed. “More than a few times already.” He watched as Dennis gave another pull on the puppy attached to his leg, and couldn’t help but smile at the little growls that escaped from where the cuff was trapped between the baby teeth. “Let him go.”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  11    Dennis dropped his hold on the puppy and Jesse bent down. “C’mon, Fred, time to show me what a good baby you are. Let me see that little black plastic nose.” As always when Jesse spoke to the puppy his voice lowered to a soft coo and as always, the puppy immediately looked up in adoration at the sound of Jesse’s voice, releasing his prize undamaged save for a few teeth marks in the fine wool that just made Jesse smile. “I don’t know how you do it.” The younger man shook his head. “He never listens to me like that. And what did you call him?” “Fred,” Jesse replied, busy teasing the puppy now sitting on his desk with the end of the adding machine paper and smiling as he watched the little ball of fur. “He’s got to have a name.” “I just don’t want to get too attached, you know?” Dennis replied. “Any takers on that ad?” Jesse asked. It had been a long and trying week with the puppy spending most of his time in Jesse’s office directly under his feet, leaving Jesse ducking both sneak attacks and puddles throughout his day. “Well, uh … no.” Dennis looked guilty. The truth was he had yet to even run the ad. Jesse sighed again and pulled his reading glasses off his face. “You need to get that in the paper, Dennis. We can’t keep the pup here. He’s going to grow into a big dog.” “I know, I know.” Dennis looked hopefully at his employer. “He really likes you, are you sure you can’t take him?”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  12    “What would I do with a dog, Dennis?” Jesse asked. “That was a rhetorical question,” he added as his young assistant opened his mouth. “You’d better take him out for a walk, it’s probably time.” “Yeah, I will.” Ignoring the soft growls, Dennis took the puppy off Jesse’s desk and then both Dennis and the dog looked at the seated man longingly. “I can’t.” Jesse wasn’t sure which pair of pleading brown eyes he was addressing, but both were equally disturbing. “Oh, I have an appointment Thursday afternoon and will be leaving early. Be sure you mark it in the calendar. And do be sure you have the ad running tomorrow, please.” “Fine.” To Jesse, it seemed as if both Dennis and the puppy sighed at the same time but he refused to look up and acknowledge either of them. ***

AFTER walking ‘Fred’, a task that always seemed to take much longer than Dennis thought it should due to the puppy’s interest in his outside surroundings, Dennis sat back down at his desk and stared glumly at his computer monitor. The puppy was perfect for Mr. Pearce; they even looked alike with their golden coloring, and his boss had been much less foreboding and much more human since the puppy’s arrival. But Dennis didn’t dare procrastinate for another week in the futile hope that the man would come to his senses and take the puppy home.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  13    He still couldn’t believe his boss had let the puppy stay this long, and Dennis was counting his blessings that the older man didn’t realize Fred spent the evenings locked in Jesse’s office, most of the time sleeping on the spare suit coat Jesse kept in the closet for client emergencies. If his boss’s carpet would never be the same, well, Dennis wasn’t going to tell if Fred didn’t. “I’m sorry, pumpkin,” Dennis addressed the puppy currently sprawled out over his feet. “But he’s the boss.” Dennis stared at his computer screen once again; he didn’t know what to write. The only ads he had ever run before had been in the personals; he wasn’t quite sure what to say in this one. Maybe there was a way to mix the two? He pulled up his last personal ad on the computer to review it and with a sigh began to type. Finally Dennis paused and squinted at what he had so far. Not bad, he just had to decide on a contact number. He was at the office more than he was at home and he wasn’t comfortable giving out his cell number. Dennis had learned his lesson the last time he had run a personal ad. It was totally a hassle having to change his cell number and let everyone that mattered know. With a shrug, he filled in Jesse’s direct dial number at the office. It rang into Dennis’s desk first anyway and then rolled over to voice mail if Jesse didn’t answer. That ought to do it. After hitting the print button, Dennis glanced at the clock and gasped at the time. He was supposed to meet the new guy down in IT for drinks and he was already running late. He frowned at the ad, biting his lip as he looked between it and the time and then smiled. Carmen down in the mailroom owed him a favor; she would help him out. ***

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  14    “I JUST need this ad to go in tonight, Car. Okay?” he pleaded. “You’re going to owe me, Dennis.” Her lisp was a little stronger today than usual, the new piercing visible on her slightly puffy lower lip. “They don’t have us working nights down here just to get out work you were too busy fucking off to do during the day.” “What? Would I do that to you? Besides, what about last week when I introduced you to the hot new guy that delivers the soda? Isn’t that worth anything to you?” He smiled winningly at her. “I’ve got a really important date tonight, but Pearce will kill me if this doesn’t go in … Pluuuueeeezzz?” Carmen’s glossy black lips parted in a wide grin, the overhead fluorescents glinting off the new diamond stud she had cemented onto her front tooth. “You know I love it when men beg.” “Wouldn’t this be more fun than just sorting boring old mail?” Dennis held his breath, wondering if he was going to end up playing his trump card. It might be worth it but he really wanted to hold on to that for a very, very rainy day. The secret to effective blackmail truly was in the timing. Rather than replying, Carmen just held out a hand tipped with black nails that were a dead match to her lipstick. “I’m working up a new personal myself tonight, for the MetroT, of course. It won’t take any more time to get this one in as well.” “You’re a lifesaver!” Dennis gave her a quick hug as he thanked her hurriedly and then rushed away, his thoughts on how best to impress his

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  15    date. He might still have time to freshen up before it was time for them to meet. Carmen watched him leave and then put the paper down on the mess that covered the top of her desk. Dennis was a nice enough guy, but her date for her lunch break should be showing up soon to take her out and she knew what she would rather be doing. But maybe there was another way … with a grin she picked up the paper again, then shuffled the pile on her desk until she found her own ad and walked over to the sort room where the new girl was working. “Melly?” Carmen yelled as she wandered through the maze of carts full of mail, boxes and supplies that needed to be sorted and then passed out to the upper offices. “Yeah, Car?” The voice was muffled but Carmen followed the sound until she found Melinda bent over one of the carts, struggling to get to a box at the bottom. “Remember when we talked about additional duties?” Carmen almost hesitated when the redhead popped up out of the cart and smiled at her. Jeez, did the kid look young. But how else was she going to learn? “Sure!” shudder.

The rabid enthusiasm expressed almost made Carmen

“There’s a couple of ads here I need you to setup to run in the local papers. One’s for the MetroT, the other is for the Observer.” Melinda made a face. “That’s the one my parents read. Booorring.”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  16    “Yeah, well, you have to remember what type of business this is.” Carmen gestured for her young co-worker to follow her back to her desk. “I’ve got both their numbers in my contacts. Do you think you can find them while I take my hour?” Carmen hesitated for a minute; did she really want this kid on her computer? “Go on ahead.” Melinda smiled cheekily up at her. “It’s just placing ads. How hard can it be?”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  17   

Chapter Three  THE bar was loud and crowded and Kyle Yarbrough was drunk. Well, okay, he didn’t know if he could really say that and mean it with any certainty given his usually high tolerance level. But he was definitely leaning to the right of sober. Or was that the left? With a tired groan he lifted his glass, tipping it back and draining it before looking up at his good friend and current confidante, blinking slightly as he tried to refocus. “I’m telling you, Brett. I’m so fucking sick of it all.” There was a lifetime of disappointment behind his words and his broad shoulders slumped beneath their weight. Brett just smiled at the good-looking man across the table and took a quick swallow of his own beer. “So you’ve said before. What’s set you off this time?” “Fucking men!” Kyle exclaimed loudly, raising his glass to his lips once again before slamming it down onto the table with disgust when he realized it was still empty. “They always say one thing, you know? Always tell you what you want to hear and then do the exact opp … opp … opposite.”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  18    “Ah.” Brett nodded his understanding despite the slight and drunken stutter. “You’ve broken up with Ellis.” Kyle gestured for the waitress who smiled eagerly at the two darkhaired men to bring him another round. “It’s not like I wanted to,” he snorted in indignation. “He just didn’t leave me any choice. How could he bring someone like that into my house?” “You guys were only together for what, two months?” Brett sighed. He knew how the evening was going to go now. The same way it did every time Kyle broke up with someone. Kyle vented and Brett listened. He really wished his friend would find someone to settle down with and stop this roller coaster. “So what went wrong this time?” “You really want to know?” Brett could only smile when Kyle looked at him with brown eyes that blinked owlishly. “No, not really. But you’re going to tell me and that’s why we’re here, right? Anything for a friend.” “Aaahhh….” Brett shuddered as Kyle suddenly gave him a boozy hug and a beery smooch on his bearded cheek. “You’re the best. Why can’t I ever want to fuck you?” “I’m just lucky, I guess.” Brett grinned and ducked as Kyle clumsily tried to swat him with one of his large hands. “You know, if he didn’t want to get serious, if he didn’t want to commit, why’d he move in with me in the first place?” Kyle looked at Brett pleadingly.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  19    It was harder now for Brett to bite his lip and not to tell his friend that Ellis, while undoubtedly a good fuck, had just been taking advantage of Kyle and his obvious desire to be in a relationship until he found someone with more assets to latch onto. Perhaps he could tell Kyle the truth later, but not now, not when his friend was already feeling so hurt. Of course, there was no indication that Kyle would listen any more than he had when Brett had tried to tell him any of this at the start of the relationship. “Well, you did meet him in a bar, Kyle,” Brett ventured. He didn’t know why his tough-looking friend was such a pushover for anyone with a hard luck story. “What does that have to do with anything?” Kyle exclaimed in exasperation. “I met you in a bar too, and look how well we get along!” “Yeah, but we’re friends,” Brett nodded sagely. “Good friends are meant to be found in bars.” “So if not in a bar, how else am I supposed to meet anybody?” Kyle waved his arm to encompass the crowd around them. “It’s not like I can just walk up to someone on the street, you know.” “Well….” “Don’t even say it.” Kyle cut Brett’s sentence off before it even had a chance. “I’m not so desperate I’m going to let Billy try and fix me up again.” “Well….”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  20    “And I’m not going to go talk to that friend of his either. The doctor guy with the weird-ass name.” Kyle glowered across the table. “I’m not crazy because I want to fall in love and be happy.” “So, what are you looking for in a guy, Kyle? I mean, really.” Brett smiled at the waitress when she brought his beer and then sat back and prepared to play shrink for his friend yet again. Maybe he would discover something that would help his own dismal love life. “I just want to be loved, you know?” Kyle looked down at his new beer as if it held the answers. “I want somebody I can love back and take care of. Someone who’s looking for the same things I am. A home, you know? A life together. Commitment. Caring and trust, the basics. Why’s that so hard to find?” “Sounds like you should just get a dog then, buddy. You’d probably be better off without all the hearts and flowers.” Brett tried hard not to snicker. “Maybe you’re looking in the wrong places.” Brett sat up suddenly. “Have you run an ad?” “What?” Kyle smirked. “One of those ‘hung like an elephant GWM searching for size queen for friendship and maybe more’ kind of things?” “Ah, you’ve read them.” Brett couldn’t help but laugh. Kyle always was a funny bastard when you got him going. Especially after a few beers. “Who hasn’t, for a laugh?” “But maybe that’s the way to go, you know?” Brett fumbled for his words, he knew he was expressing his own thoughts on the matter, but

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  21    what did he have to lose? “Both of you right up front spelling out what you’d like from the other person and what you have to give.” “I guess.” Kyle was still laughing as he drained his glass once again and signaled for another. “Why didn’t Ellis just tell me he wasn’t happy?” Brett just sighed at the change in tune and lifted his own finger at the waitress’s inquiring glance. It looked like it was going to be a long night and he was definitely going to need extra refreshment if Kyle was going to rehash every aspect of the relationship. On the bright side, at least they’d only been together for two months – surely there couldn’t be too many aspects to rehash? Kyle stood suddenly, swaying as he caught at the table. “I think I saw the MetroT in the doorway. I’ll be right back.” Brett snickered as he watched his friend carefully maneuver his way to the small rack of papers and back again with exaggerated care. While always amusing, Kyle was hysterically funny when he was in the throes of a breakup. Which, at the rate he went through relationships, was a good thing for Brett. “What’d I tell you?” Kyle waved the paper triumphantly as he sat back down with a thud. “Let’s see what we got here,” he leered at Brett. “If nothing else, maybe we can find somebody in here for you.” “Asshole!” Brett shot back even as he scooted his chair closer. Their dark heads bent over the small circular while Kyle flipped to the classifieds. “Check this out!” Kyle was laughing as he tried to read an ad out loud. “Tired of Mr. Wong? Get ready for Mr. Right.”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  22    “God, I hope that’s a typo,” Brett grunted as he snorted beer up his nose and wiped at his face. “Ick.” Kyle waggled his eyebrows. “I don’t know. Mr. Wong has a hell of a ring to it.” “Stop.” Brett held his hand up. “I’m not drunk enough for wong jokes.” “Spoilsport.” Kyle shoved the paper under Brett’s nose. “How about this one? He totally sounds like your type.” Brett rolled his eyes. It was definitely going to be a long night.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  23   

Chapter Four  DÉJÀ VU. “I don’t really know why I’m here.” Jesse shrugged slightly, uncomfortable under the weight of the eyes watching him. “I suppose you hear that a lot, though?” “Often enough.” No spectacles this time, just a kind smile on the pleasantly striking face that went a long way to ease some of his nervousness. “We can take things slow, if that will help. Let’s start with why you made the appointment in the first place.” Jesse exhaled in relief and stared at the ceiling as he fumbled for the right words. “Ah … it was kind of a spur of the moment decision. I was having drinks with some friends, we were just talking, you know? Somebody walked by with a shirt that had ‘the definition of insanity is doing the same thing every time but expecting different results’ printed on it. I guess … I … erh … want some different results.” “Very good, Jesse.” The kind smile extended up to the liquid brown eyes. “Results in what area?” “Life … I guess. Relationships.” Jesse couldn’t help but fidget and he shifted in his chair. This time the office he was trapped in was

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  24    furnished in a more casual manner. It could have been called restful, except it didn’t help Jesse’s nerves. “Hmmmm. That’s a good first step. Let’s explore that a bit. How are your relationships?” Jesse looked up in panic but the calm expression on the dark brown face soothed him. “Okay, I mean friends, co-workers, all that’s fine enough.” “So it’s serious relationships that are the issue?” “I’ve been divorced a few times,” Jesse confessed; dropping his eyes to his knees and picking at the thread loose on his pants from where Fred had caught him with his puppy claws. “I can understand how that would tend to make you doubt yourself.” Jesse looked up but there wasn’t any judgment on the calm face watching him, just concern and kindness as the pencil scratched across the notepad. “So, you’ve been divorced. You are heterosexual?” Jesse paused. “Uhm … does this all have to get written down?” The pencil stopped moving and was placed carefully down on the pad. “Not if it makes you uncomfortable. I refuse to allow a patient’s concern for confidentiality interfere with their progress.” “Could we just talk about things and not put them in the file?” Jesse asked softly. He was surprised at how much easier this was with another man rather than a woman. He might have thought just the opposite if he

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  25    hadn’t sat across from that woman last week and discovered he would rather risk certain death than share his uncertainties about life with her. But with this guy, Arlando something or another his name was, Jesse was finding it painful but not quite worthy of death. “If that is your preference.” The therapist’s brown eyes gazed steadily into his and Jesse took a deep breath before looking down again, suddenly aware of the implications behind the last word. After all these years was this really happening here, now? Was it time? “Great.” There was a long pause while Jesse inwardly struggled, finally looking up again and shrugging ruefully. “I understand it’s difficult, Jesse, but let’s try again. So you’ve been divorced, are you heterosexual?” The voice was once again soft and undemanding and a cocoa-colored hand gestured in the air for gentle emphasis. “Not … totally,” Jesse managed to choke out through a suddenly closed throat. “Do you want to talk about that?” “I’m not sure.” “Let’s talk about your sex life then, Jesse.” “My sex life?” Jesse squeaked.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  26    “Yes, how satisfactory is it?” The rich voice stayed soft and soothing and Jesse felt himself relax a bit more. “I’m not really involved with anyone right now.” Brown eyes were looking at him steadily again. Hell, who was Jesse kidding? They were looking right through him. “Do you feel you have to be involved with someone to have sex?” “I’m not sure,” Jesse mumbled. “Good enough.” A flash of white teeth. At least this guy had a sense of humor about him. “Let’s see if we can help you clarify that. When you have sex with a woman, are you usually involved with her?” “Yes,” Jesse admitted slowly, not sure where this line of questioning was headed but positive it was in an uncomfortable direction. “When you have sex with a man, are you usually involved with him?” “Not usually.” Jesse coughed; his throat was suddenly tight with emotion as he tried to articulate the things he had not even acknowledged to himself. “Thank you for being open with me, Jesse. I know it’s difficult, but I think it’s necessary. What was the best sexual experience you ever had; was it with a man or a woman?” Jesse hesitated again, unsure of just how much of himself he wanted to expose.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  27    “Remember, Jesse,” Dr. Williams’s soft voice prodded him gently. “You’re the one that came to me.” “With a man.” Jesse exhaled heavily after having finally forced the words out. “And what made it so special, do you remember?” “Well, it was with someone I didn’t know, someone I never saw again.” Jesse wiped at his forehead as he realized he was sweating. “What difference did that make? Can you tell me?” Jesse wondered how such a soft voice could be so hard to resist as it relentlessly poked and prodded at him. “I … uhm … I could be anything, I could do anything and it didn’t matter.” “Why didn’t it matter, Jesse?” Jesse looked out the window to avoid the kind eyes. “I wasn’t going to see them again. I could trust … they couldn’t … they wouldn’t….” Jesse broke off, unable to finish. “They couldn’t hold anything you did or said against you the next day and because of that it was easier to be honest with them?” “Yes,” Jesse whispered, ashamed to have his feelings put into words. The man opposite him shifted slightly, looking at a small clock on the shelf beside Jesse. “We’re out of time for today, Jesse. But I must say

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  28    you’ve been exceptionally brave and open with me this first session. I don’t think we’ll be seeing each other for long if you continue to make such good progress.” “Really?” Jesse looked up in amazement. “Really.” Dr. Williams just smiled some more. Unlike the woman Jesse had seen last week, he seemed real and warm. “You seem to already have the answers you need. Maybe you just needed a little direction. To help with that, I’ve got some homework for you.” “Homework?” Jesse grimaced. Ignoring the interruption, Dr. Williams continued, “I want you to think about those same questions I just asked you, but this time, instead of sex, I want you to answer them in terms of intimacy.” “Intimacy?” Jesse couldn’t seem to get past the one-word answers, but at least the boulder seemed to be gone from his throat. “It’s not sex that makes a relationship, Jesse.” The doctor leaned forward earnestly. “And it doesn’t matter if it’s with a man or a woman. It’s trust and intimacy and honesty that will bind your life and your soul with another, and really, Jesse, isn’t that what you’re looking for?”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  29   

Chapter Five  “SHIT!” That hurt. Jesse rubbed his nose where it had mashed into the door in front of him, then giggled slightly before looking around him theatrically and clamping his hand over his mouth to stifle the sound. There was something about sneaking around in the dark that brought out the little boy in him. He could have turned the overhead lights on but that would ruin the fun. He swayed slightly, squinting even though he knew he couldn’t see anything in the dark office, and tried once again to find the lock to his office door. Jesse was drunk. He knew he was drunk and that made it okay. It was only when you didn’t know enough to know that you were drunk that it was not … okay. Was that okay? Finally he managed to fit his key in the keyhole but while it went in a few millimeters it wouldn’t turn. Maybe it was upside down? Jesse leaned his weight against the door, one hand pressing to the lock face so he wouldn’t lose it again, the other fumbling to turn the key around. Aha! There was a telltale click and Jesse pushed the door open. He heard the sound of toenails and then an eager whine and a chuff. “Fred?” he murmured. “Is that you, boy?” He moved slowly forward, his arms outstretched before him as he wobbled a bit for balance.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  30    “Shhhhh.” Jesse bent down to hush the puppy but overbalanced and fell forward onto his knees. “Eeeew,” he exclaimed as his hand fell into a damp patch on the carpeting. “Bad puppy.” Jesse lifted his hand and looked around before wiping it on his pants. Fred just danced forward, happy to see his favorite human. “Good puppy,” Jesse muttered as he petted the quivering body that pressed up against him. With a sigh he rolled onto his rear and stretched his legs out in front of him as he hugged the furry mass to his chest. “Whooops!” Jesse fell over onto his back and stared up at what he knew was the ceiling to his office while Fred yipped in excitement and clambered over him to lick and wiggle in his face. It was still early and Jesse could have gone home but his apartment seemed lonely and empty. Besides, it seemed like the office was more his home than not. “Hell,” he grimaced. What a day. He swiped a hand in front of his face to try and shoo Fred away, but the puppy just thought it was part of the game and grabbed at his shirt cuff. It was dark and quiet in the office but Jesse still didn’t have any urge to turn on the lights. For just a few minutes, here in the dark, maybe he could allow himself to think about the things he had learned today. Intimacy. Did he really want to think about intimacy? Did he really want to think about any of this? Jesse hadn’t earlier. That was why he had headed straight to the closest bar and proceeded to get drunker than he had in years, drunker even than he had when his last wife had left.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  31    He had almost let himself get picked up too. When the rather tiredlooking brunette had approached him, he had welcomed her presence as a distraction from his thoughts and been more than willing to flirt and buy her a few drinks. What was wrong with two adults looking for a little forgetfulness? It was only after things had progressed beyond flirting and her enameled nails had been stroking his thigh that Jesse had realized this wasn’t what he wanted at all. Or at least, she wasn’t what he wanted at all. He didn’t want curves and perfume, softness and paint and the need to be the aggressor. No, what Jesse really wanted was the feeling of hard muscles beneath his fingers, the callus of another man’s touch against his skin and the scratch of another man’s whiskers against his cheek. He wanted to be taken. What the hell, Jesse told himself. In for a penny, out for a pound. He had said things today, thought things he had denied for years. Why not let it all hang out. Is this what his problem had been? How intimate could he really have been if he hadn’t been honest with himself or those closest to him about what he really wanted? Not very. Old arguments, old fights filled his mind and Jesse rolled over to press his stinging eyes into the carpet beneath him. Fred snuffled his ears and neck and Jesse dragged the puppy closer to him for comfort. But even over the sound of the tiny heartbeat, Jesse could still hear the words of his last wife. What do you want? She had asked him that

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  32    time and time again. But he had never been able to answer her, never been able to open up and be honest. He had been unable to let go of the fear that if he really opened himself up to her she’d leave. Hadn’t she done that anyway? The groan that filled the dark office seemed to come from the depth of Jesse’s very soul and he pushed himself back up onto his knees with effort. Tomorrow. He would think about all of this tomorrow. Right now he needed some sleep. “You wanna roommate for the night, buddy?” Jesse asked the panting creature beside him. Fred really was a nice dog. It was going to be a shame when Dennis finally found him a home. Jesse was really going to miss him. There was a red light blinking on his desk phone and Jesse hesitated as he realized it was the message indicator. That was surprising as he knew Dennis always checked before he left to make sure none of the calls were important enough to need an after hours response. “Who could it be now?” Jesse giggled again as he started singing the line from that old song. “Let’s find out.” After a moment of fumbling Jesse was able to turn his desk light on. He blinked at the sudden brightness and picked up the handset to punch in his code numbers. When the recorded voice told him that he had fifteen messages he was shocked. Fred was gnawing at his ankles, and Jesse absently picked him up and set him on top of the desk where he could pet the playful puppy. The

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  33    first couple of messages were hang-ups but the next one that played made him hold the phone away from his ear in disbelief. “What the hell?” Jesse looked down at Fred and then back at the phone before he brought it to his ear once again. What kind of filthy pervert would leave a message like that? And why on his phone? There were a few more in the same vein but finally one had less filth and enough real words for Jesse to realize that Dennis’s ad must have run and somehow his office number had been in the ad. But still, what kind of weirdos were out there in the world? Who would want to do those kinds of things to a cute little puppy? Jesse clutched Fred to him protectively. He would take the mutt home himself before he let any of these jerks get their hands on him. Easily forgetting he had agreed the advertisement was a good idea, Jesse wondered just what Dennis been thinking when he thought this was the way to find Fred a good home. Did he really think that it would be okay to just hand the poor little guy to some stranger? Jesse nuzzled his face in the soft fur and laughed softly when Fred rewarded him with a lick and small yip before burrowing that little black plastic nose in his neck. “That’s wet,” Jesse laughed again. “Wet and cold.” Jesse listened to the rest of the messages, his agitation growing with each one he deleted. This was just ridiculous and he really wished he could give just one of those callers a piece of his mind. Even as he thought about what he would like to say, the phone rang once again. “Hello?” Jesse picked the phone up and answered cautiously.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  34    “Hi. I’m … uh ... calling about the ad?” The voice was rather nice in a low and husky way, not like any of the others, but Jesse was just drunk enough to be belligerent anyway. “You’re lucky I don’t call the authorities on you,” Jesse threatened the caller. “What are you thinking calling my phone and leaving filthy suggestions like that?” “Uh….” “There’s a name for sickos like you. You know that, don’t you?” Jesse was starting to warm up, the alcohol fueling his righteous indignation. “Hey, look, man….” “No. You look. There’s not a chance in hell I’m going to let a sweet little thing like Fred go home with you. If anything, he’s coming home with me, and I’ll tell Dennis that first thing in the morning.” “Well, if you and Fred and Dennis are so happy together, why did one of you run the ad? That’s false advertising, you know!” Jesse’s caller had obviously gotten over his surprise. “Because I can’t very well keep a dog in the office!” Jesse explained with all the logic of a beer or five. “A dog?” That nice voice was sounding a little slurred and confused itself. “This is the number for the ad in the MetroT, isn’t it? You know, the one that started out ‘tired of looking for love in all the wrong places’?”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  35    “Oh.” Jesse suddenly deflated. “No, it’s not. My assistant ran an ad for a stray dog he found. The ad was in the Observer.” “Sorry. I must have misdialed.” There was a pause and then the caller read off the number. Jesse rubbed his face and ran his fingers through his hair as he leaned back in his chair. Fred had suddenly gotten tired and collapsed in his lap in that boneless way puppies had. “That’s my number, but I can’t believe it’s in some ad for the lovelorn. Must have been some kind of mix-up.” “Oh. So, you aren’t looking for a date?” The voice on the other end sounded rather wistful. “You have a really nice voice.” “Really?” Jesse could feel a blush rising on his cheeks. “I mean, uh … so do you.” “For a pervert.” That was definitely laughter Jesse could hear. “Hey, you should have heard some of the messages on my machine. Some of these guys aren’t quite right.” Jesse shuddered as he thought about some of the messages; they were even weirder when he looked at them in the human context. “I’ve probably dated them, then.” humorous and Jesse joined in his laughter.

The response was wry and

“It’s kind of late. What are you doing at your office?” His caller had settled back and gotten comfortable by the sounds of things and Jesse suddenly wasn’t as tired as he thought.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  36    “I had a strange day, you know? Went out and had a few, it was easier to come back here than try to get home.” Even though the other man couldn’t see him, Jesse’s shoulders shrugged. “No one waiting up for you?” “Not any more.” Jesse sighed. “It’s a long story.” “I’ve got time.” The husky voice softened. “I’ve got rather a long story myself.” “Really? I’m tired of mine. Why don’t you tell me yours?” Jesse didn’t know why he was so reluctant to hang up the phone but he was all the same. “What’s your name first? Mine’s Kyle.” “I’m Jesse.” Jesse cleared his throat. “Pleased to meet you, Kyle. So, what happened that you’re looking at personal ads?” “I feel kind of stupid now, you know, talking it out. The same story as most, I guess. Boy meets boy. Boy moves in with boy. Boy brings other boys home when boy number one is at work. Boy number one catches boy. Boy number one is alone. Again.” “Ouch.” Jesse winced in sympathy. “Still, you’ve got a good sense of humor about things.” Kyle laughed. “Can’t help it. Get enough beer down me and everything’s amusing. Maybe instead of answering ads for a boyfriend I should have answered your ad about a dog. Is he a nice one?”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  37    “Fred’s a real champ.” Jesse smiled affectionately down at the puppy curled up in lap, sound asleep. “I’m going to hate to give him up.” “Why are you?” “You know, I don’t really know.” Jesse let his head fall back against the chair. He really liked this guy. “Tell me, Kyle, what do think of when you hear the word intimacy?”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  38   

Chapter Six.  “I

HAVE to say, Jesse, I’m really impressed at how far you’ve come in

these last several weeks.” Dr. Williams smiled at Jesse proudly. “It’s amazing the progress that can be made when a client is really willing to work at it.” “Well, I’ve had some help, I admit.” Jesse laughed. He was at ease now with Dr. Williams. Actually, he couldn’t remember why he had felt so nervous in the first place. “Fred, of course, and your new friend, Kyle?” Dr. Williams looked down at his notes. “Yeah.” Jesse couldn’t help the faint flush that rose up over his cheeks at the mention of Kyle. It was funny how close he felt to the other man even though they’d only talked over the phone. “You three are putting me out of business.” It was Dr. Williams’s turn to laugh as he put his pen down. “You’ve already completed the next several steps in my planned treatment. I honestly think it’s time we take a break.” “Really?” Jesse blinked in surprise.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  39    “Obviously if something comes up and you feel you would like to talk about it, I’m here for you, Jesse. But you’re more than ready to step out on your own and take some risks.” The two men stood and shook hands. Jesse struggled for something meaningful to say, some way to let the other man know just how much Jesse appreciated his candor and support, before he gave up and just enfolded the doctor in his arms for a tight hug. “Now I know we’ve been successful.” Dr. Williams gave Jesse a pat on the back. “You’ll do fine, Jesse. Just trust yourself and you can’t go wrong.” ***

JESSE was whistling as he walked into his office suite. A large, golden mass of fur leapt up from his cushioned bed beside Dennis’s desk and came running across the marble floor. “Hey, Fred!” Jesse bent down to give his dog a hug and some rough pets. He didn’t even wince when Fred’s tongue lolled out with pleasure and drooled copious amounts of liquid onto his shoes. “How was he?” Dennis shook his head at the sight of his boss and Fred together. While he had thought the two were perfect for each other, he hadn’t meant for his boss to not only keep the dog but to insist that he come to work with him every day now as well. “He was fine. Missed you, though.” Dennis didn’t really mind Fred being around the office. It certainly gave him plenty of opportunity to be

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  40    away from his desk under the guise of ‘walking’ the dog. And the changes in Mr. Pearce were incredible. Really, Dennis sniffed, he should get a raise for his success at setting up his boss with a companion. “How was your appointment?” Dennis had to yell to be heard in his boss’s office, an event that would have been unheard of pre-Fred, he thought smugly. Maybe he should consider changing his line of work? There were dog whisperers, right? Apparently he was a terrific dog matchmaker. “It went well.” Dennis struggled not to laugh as both Jesse’s and Fred’s golden heads poked around the door at the same time and with almost the same interested expression. “So well, in fact, I think we’re closing the office to celebrate. Pack it up, Dennis. I’m calling it a day.” “Super!” Dennis enthused. He wasn’t going to argue with that. “You picked a good day for it.” “Is there a problem?” Jesse came out of the office with his briefcase in hand and Fred eagerly following right behind him. “No mail again.” Dennis shook his head. “Third time this week.” “What’s up with that?” “There’s a big stink downstairs.” Dennis leaned forward, eager to impart the juicy gossip. “Carmen, the night supervisor in the mailroom, ran off with some weird guy she met through a personal ad and I guess everything’s a mess.” “Really?” Jesse look intrigued and then he smiled sheepishly. “You’d be amazed the people you can meet that way.”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  41    ***

JESSE looked at his watch and sighed once again. It was still too early to give Kyle a call. He knew the other man was out with his friend Brett and they were celebrating Brett’s new promotion at work. Well, he had something to celebrate as well. Jesse had thanked Doctor Williams for his part in Jesse’s newfound equilibrium, and he wanted to thank Kyle as well. It was funny how things worked out with the mix-up in the ads. Sometimes he still couldn’t believe the way everything felt so right. It was something Jesse had given a lot of thought to as he and Fred went on their evening run. Take some risks, the doctor had told Jesse. Well, he was going to take a big one and ask Kyle to dinner. He wanted to meet the other man. He really felt like they had gotten close over the last month. He and Kyle already knew more about each other’s warts and foibles than any other relationship he’d ever been in. After that first phone call they had developed on ongoing dialogue via their calls, graduating from Jesse’s office phone to their own cells over which they had exchanged pictures. It was no surprise that Kyle’s self-portraits were more humorous than Jesse’s. He had a great sense of humor, something Jesse really enjoyed about him. They took turns calling and while it had started slow they now talked every night without fail. There was something about the relative anonymity of a phone call that had allowed them to explore themselves with more honesty than

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  42    either one of them had ever experienced. Jesse found it remarkably freeing; from Kyle’s comments he did as well. And if Jesse ended up with a hard-on that wouldn’t quit after those calls – that was a statement in and of itself. But how to go about it? Jesse had hopes, sure – and he even thought that the other man reciprocated them, but he didn’t want to scare Kyle off. Before Jesse could reach any hard or fast decision his cell rang. Jesse looked at the picture of Kyle sticking his tongue out that illuminated the small screen and smiled. He looked at the time with surprise but picked it up and settled back on his couch. “Hey.” It was Kyle’s voice. Jesse ranked that voice high on his list of favorite things. It wasn’t deep, but it was smoky maybe? Husky with an underlying hint of humor that was never far behind. “It’s early. I thought the party would go on a bit longer.” Jesse couldn’t help but tease. “You guys getting old?” “Brett pussed out on me. Something about having to get up and go to work tomorrow.” “Promotions will do that do you,” Jesse agreed as he stretched his legs out in front of him. Fred raised his head, the tags on his collar jangling before he saw that Jesse wasn’t going anywhere and settled back down with his paws over his nose. “Not that I would know.” Jesse just snorted and ignored the comment. He knew Kyle ran his own successful landscaping business. There were no promotions to be had when you were the boss.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  43    “It’s been a long day.” Jesse’s insides did a bit of flip-flop as he heard Kyle groan over the line. “You tired?” “Sore.” Kyle groaned again. “One of the guys called in sick today and the ramps were stuck on the trailer. We had to lift a couple of the tractors out.” “Manual labor? The horror.” Jesse couldn’t resist teasing again before his tone became serious. “You didn’t hurt yourself?” “Thanks for the vote of confidence,” Kyle shot back. “If you were really concerned you’d come give me a back rub.” Jesse was silent for a moment as he imagined all the things on Kyle he could rub and then he cleared his throat. “Yeah, I’ve been told I give a pretty good one. Where are you right now?” “I’m on my couch. Why? Is this going to turn into one of those ‘what are you wearing’ calls?” Kyle laughed and then groaned again. “Shit. Don’t make me laugh, it hurts when I laugh. You know, if you really loved me you’d do something distract me from the pain.” “Okay.” Jesse swallowed. “What do you want me to do?” He couldn’t help the way his own voice grew husky. This time the pause was on Kyle’s end and Jesse was afraid he had taken Kyle’s comment too seriously. “Tell me what you’re wearing, that’ll distract me.”

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  44    “What?” Jesse felt his cheeks flush. “You serious?” “I’m an injured man. It’s your duty.” Kyle was still laughing but his voice was deeper than Jesse had ever heard it. “For God and country, then?” Jesse reached up and turned the light off on the side table with shaking fingers. He had never really done anything like this before. Risks. He was taking a big one. “Did you and Fred run tonight?” Kyle was talking again, his voice helping Jesse feel more at ease. “Did you shower afterward?” “Yeah.” Jesse felt his flush travel all the way up to his ears as he remembered what he had done in the shower and just who he had thought about while doing it. “Then I put on my usual sweats and a t-shirt.” “I bet you smell nice. All warm and clean from the shower, wrapped up in soft cotton.” “Uh … I guess.” Despite getting himself off in the shower, Jesse was starting to react to the slow and almost drowsy note in Kyle’s voice. His cock stirred and lengthened against his thigh. “Any underwear?” “No.” sweats.”

Jesse could barely breathe at his own daring.

“Just the

“Nice. That’s just how I’ve imagined you.” Was that really Kyle’s voice? Jesse wondered. It sounded familiar but it wasn’t. It sounded mysterious. Beckoning.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  45    “So if you were to reach a hand down under the waistband and trace the fine line of hair down your belly you’d be able to wrap your fingers around your cock?” “Kyle?” Jesse’s voice trembled even as he found his hand moving down under the waistband of his sweats just as Kyle had suggested. “It’s okay, Jesse.” Kyle was suddenly soothing Jesse, knowing somehow he was pushing into new territory. “We’ll do it together. Are you holding yourself now?” “Yes.” Jesse could scarcely breathe the way his heart was pounding in his chest. “I am too. I’m hard, you know? I always am when we talk. There’s something about your voice that just makes my cock stiff.” “I … I didn’t know.” Jesse felt his fingers begin to move as Kyle spoke. How long had he wanted to do this? Just bring himself off while listening to the magic of Kyle’s voice? “I didn’t want to scare you.” Jesse swore he could hear the rustle of clothing through the phone and then Kyle groaned again. “God, that feels good.” “Yeah.” Jesse’s hand was moving faster without his urging, tugging with short, fast strokes. It felt like something in a dream. A truth he couldn’t deny. He wanted this man, he had for a while.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  46    “I bet your cock feels like silk. All hard and hot. I can’t help but wish it was your cock in my hand right now. The things I’d to you, Jesse. The things I want to do to you.” Oh fuck. Jesse couldn’t believe how hot this was. He was breathing hard now, panting into the phone while his cock was leaking fluid without pause. Just hearing the rasp of Kyle’s voice and the sound of Kyle’s heavy breathing was turning him on like a firecracker. The whole the time Jesse’s hand kept moving up and down the length of his cock, pausing right under the swollen head to rub his fingernail over the soft skin. Just an extra bit of sensation that was almost enough to bring him off. “I don’t even need any lube for this.” Kyle was talking again, telling Jesse things that were just winding him up tighter than he had ever been before. “You’ve got me dripping. All I have to do is move my hand over the top and smear it on down. You sound so good, Jesse, talk to me.” “I … I don’t know what to say.” Jesse was groaning now with each slippery stroke. He knew Kyle could hear the familiar sound of flesh working flesh. He wanted Kyle to hear. Hell, right now, he needed Kyle to hear. “Just tell me how you feel. What you like. What would you like me to do?” Kyle’s husky voice wove a spell of silken seduction around Jesse, one that in the quiet darkness of his apartment he was unable to resist. It felt like velvet on his skin, touching him, opening him up, drawing his balls tighter and closer to his body. “I want this,” Jesse managed to choke out. “I do want this. I want you.” Even as Jesse opened his mouth to continue it all became a blur, a

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  47    wash of sound and sensation that shoved him over a cliff with the sound of Kyle’s voice as his only lifeline, until all he could do was feel the overwhelming force of their combined desire as it poured out of their bodies in what seemed like an endless stream of thick, pearly come. He didn’t think he had ever shot that hard. Jesse didn’t know how long they stayed on the phone with no sound between them but the gradual quieting of their breath. If knowledge was power then each of them had just given it up to the other. It should have been scary. But it wasn’t. “So.” Jesse was finally able to speak. “Dinner, next?” His fears suddenly seemed groundless. This wasn’t the usual way he started a relationship. There wasn’t anything usual about this at all. But it was Kyle. And it was okay. “You buying?” Jesse loved hearing the relaxed satisfaction in Kyle’s voice and he loved knowing he had put it there. “Absolutely,” Jesse asserted eagerly. “I guess it all depends on how fast you get here then, doesn’t it?” Kyle still sounded half-asleep and Jesse suddenly wanted to see him like that, all sated and sleepy. Jesse wanted to smell him and touch him and know that he was as deep into this as Jesse was. “Otherwise it will end up being breakfast.” “What about Fred?” Jesse asked, the implications behind Kyle’s words not bothering him a bit. The big golden dog looked up excitedly at the sound of his name.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  48    “Hell, bring him along. It’s the least you can do since he brought us together so to speak.” Together. Jesse hadn’t heard anything that sounded that good in a long time. There was a smile on his face as he picked up Fred’s leash and looked around the empty apartment he was leaving behind. He had wanted change and he had gotten it. Jesse still wasn’t sure how he had been so lucky but one thing he did know – he wouldn’t be able to tell Dennis how he and Kyle met; the little bastard would definitely want a raise.

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  49    Chrissy Munder The joke in Chrissy Munder's family is that she was born with a book in her hand. Even now, you'll never find her without a book or seven scattered about. Forced to become a practicing realist in an effort to combat her tendency to dream, her many years of travel and a diverse assortment of careers have taken her across most of the U.S. and shown her that there are two things you can never have enough of: love and laughter. Check out these other titles by Chrissy Munder…   

 

   

 

Hearts & Flowers by Chrissy Munder  50    ©Copyright Chrissy Munder, 2008 Published by Dreamspinner Press 4760 Preston Road Suite 244-149 Frisco, TX 75034 http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/ This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the authors’ imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental. Cover Art by Dan Skinner/Cerberus Inc. [email protected] Cover Design by Mara McKennen This book is licensed to the original purchaser only. Duplication or distribution via any means is illegal and a violation of International Copyright Law, subject to criminal prosecution and upon conviction, fines and/or imprisonment. This eBook cannot be legally loaned or given to others. No part of this eBook can be shared or reproduced without the express permission of the publisher. To request permission and all other inquiries, contact Dreamspinner Press at: 4760 Preston Road, Suite 244-149, Frisco, TX 75034 http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/ Released in the United States of America September, 2008