All Fired Up

CIRCLE OF FRIENDS: ALL FIRED UP …Using his teeth, he pulled her bra straps down her slender shoulders and planted kiss...

Author: Garza Gabrina

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CIRCLE OF FRIENDS: ALL FIRED UP

…Using his teeth, he pulled her bra straps down her slender shoulders and planted kisses on her with his warm, smooth lips. She wanted him to kiss her everywhere, head to toe. She needed to feel his lips against her collarbone, his teeth grazing her belly button, his tongue prying her open and sucking on her juices until her legs trembled and a climax ripped through her. “Kevin, I need you,” she whispered, cupping his face in her hands. His scent filled her, the familiar musk that brought her back to a boy turned man. He lifted his hips in answer and left her quivering, her breath leaving her lungs as a whimper of total surrender. She gripped his shoulders, her fingers bunched around his corded muscles. Straightening her legs, she lowered as he pushed upward, the head of his cock entering her. She sighed in relief as he filled her with one hard thrust that lifted both of them from the chair. Together they came down hard, the chair rocking back where it slammed into the wall. Her toes curled as he pumped her, his hands gripped tight around her narrow waist just above the swell of her hips. She’d never been wanted with such urgency—and she didn’t know if she’d ever wanted a man more than she wanted Kevin inside of her, grinding against her sensitive clit, filling her with each tilt of his hips.

“Don’t stop,” she begged, allowing him to guide her, wanting nothing more than to hold on and enjoy the ride. “I’m not a teenager, Gert.” He pressed his forehead to hers and smiled. “I can last a hell of a lot longer than two minutes…”

ALSO BY GABRINA GARZA Adeno Circle Of Friends: All Wet Hot Phoenix Nights Jax and the Giant’s Bean Stalk One Last Kiss River Of Time: Dreamwalker Sex Between Strangers Take Me Out The Countess Of Suburbia Wide Open Spaces

CIRCLE OF FRIENDS: ALL FIRED UP BY GABRINA GARZA

AMBER Q UILL PRESS, LLC http://www.AmberQuill.com

CIRCLE OF F RIENDS : ALL FIRED UP AN AMBER QUILL PRESS BOOK This book is a work of fiction. All names, characters, locations, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination, or have been used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, locales, or events is entirely coincidental. Amber Quill Press, LLC http://www.AmberQuill.com All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be transmitted or reproduced in any form, or by any means, without permission in writing from the publisher, with the exception of brief excerpts used for the purposes of review. Copyright © 2007 by Gabrina Garza ISBN 978-1-60272-225-5 Cover Art © 2007 Trace Edward Zaber

Layout and Formatting provided by: Elemental Alchemy

PUBLISHED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

For Tom and his great firefighter stories at the open house, both of which I politely stole.


CHAPTER 1 The smoke detector continued to shriek at decibels higher than appropriate for human ears. It drowned out the intercom and the panicked voices of men and women rushing through the office who continued to get in Gert Randall’s way. Despite the blaring alarm, most people still stopped to shut down their computers or rifle through their briefcases—more upset about their lives being interrupted than the very real danger of becoming a roast. Dressed in three-inch heels, Gert ran for the nearest exit, pushing past coworkers preoccupied with their cell phones, on her one-woman stampede toward the stairs. When she’d started at Lancaster and Associates six months 1


ago, the forty-third floor had seemed like a prestigious luxury. Now, faced with disabled elevators and enough stairs to give her a rock-hard ass, she hated her corner office and its killer view of the city. Her footsteps echoed through the concrete stairwell, which made her wonder why no one else had followed her lead and run like hell. She untied her silk scarf from around her neck and used it to cover her mouth and nose, catching a light whiff or her perfume. If a giant cloud of smoke caught up with her, she would be prepared. “Stop, drop, and roll, baby,” she said to herself. Distant voices caught up with Gert as she reached the thirty-seventh floor and realized why she’d bought a membership to the gym. Unfortunately, she hadn’t used it since her very first gung-ho introductory week. Muscles she’d never known existed ached for days afterward, which had ultimately led her to think about how she should go since she paid seventy dollars a month. Her lungs burned, the backs of her calves seemed about to disintegrate if she went on much longer. As she focused on the stairs before her, she wondered why someone hadn’t invented a fireproof elevator for lazy, non-athletic people like her who couldn’t handle hauling ass down seven thousand stairs before her building became a blazing inferno. “Gert!” someone yelled. She vaguely recognized Stanley Westhouse’s voice. One of Lancaster’s senior accountants, he had a way of saying her name that always gave her the creeps. In the stairwell his 2


voice emerged even shriller and more unpleasant than it did in the office, and she twisted around, trying to see if he was far behind her. “What?” she yelled. “What in the hell are you doing?” Were her coworkers that daft? Couldn’t he hear the deafening warning all around them? She didn’t bother with an answer. Talking to him would only be a waste of breath, and right now she needed all of her oxygen content fueling her muscles. “Gert!” Stan yelled again. “Fire!” she shouted. “Emergency!” “No,” he said. “False alarm. Didn’t you read your memo this morning?” “Memo? What are you—” Her feet gave out—or rather, her shoe gave out. Donna Karan’s were not accustomed to the brutal treatment she’d issued on her new heels, and as she slid down the unforgiving stairs, all she could think of was that at least she’d bought them on clearance. In a vain attempt to keep from sliding down on her butt, she reached out and grabbed hold of the railing, which slipped from her grasp thanks to the scarf in her hand. No matter how hard she tried to steady herself, she lost the scarf and one of her nails in the fruitless struggle. Skirt hiked up around her hips, legs wide apart, and broken heel forgotten behind her, she came to a stop somewhere along the thirty-sixth floor. “You can come back up now,” Stan said. A door slammed, 3


signaling he’d left her bruised and helpless on the stairs. With a trembling hand she pushed her strawberry blond bangs out of her eyes and bit her lower lip to keep from sobbing. The alarms had scared the hell out of her, a bad reminder from her past, a screaming banshee of smoke and fire. She tried to turn on to her side, but when she moved, pain surged through her right wrist and her left ankle. “Stan!” she yelled. With no other choice, she counted to ten and waited, but he’d gone back to his desk or out to smoke. Left in between floors, she either had to crawl up the stairs to where she’d come from or maneuver her way back down and hope she could find someone to call an ambulance. She took a breath, prepared to scream for help, but her throat closed and only a squeak emerged. With the fire alarms still blaring, it didn’t matter since she guessed no one could hear her. Tears pricked the backs of her eyes and she played with the beads on her bracelet. Tony would be so disappointed in her if she’d called him at the end of the day and told him she’d broken down during a fire drill. Thinking of him opened the flood gates, and within moments she lay curled on the floor, quietly weeping into her hands. God, this was getting worse by the minute. Now not only had she fallen down the stairs, but her makeup would look like modern art, a swirl of eye shadow, mascara, and foundation bleeding down her mottled face. 4


Heavy footsteps stomped toward her, and she wiped her face with the heels of her hands and sat up. “I need help,” she said. “Please, I need help!” The alarm stopped blaring just as she yelled, and two heavy, gray boots with reflective tape stopped before her. She gazed up long legs hidden beneath baggy protective gear to a man carrying a utility flashlight in one hand and a bright yellow helmet with E.F.D across the front. Pale green eyes narrowed and perfect, full lips parted. Lord have mercy… “Jesus,” he murmured. He appeared startled to find someone in the hall—or maybe he figured he’d meet someone eventually, just not a woman sprawled out on the ground. “Are you okay?” She wiped her nose and took a moment to compose herself. Naturally fate had dropped an absolutely gorgeous man before her in her most miserable hour. “I think I broke my ankle,” she said, casually bringing her skirt down to mid-thigh. Even if he was tall, handsome, and dressed like one of her top five fantasies, she didn’t want to give him the goodies—not without coffee, some time alone, and major flirting. The firefighter—K. Thomas, according to the name sewn onto the left breast—crouched beside her and rested his hands on his knees. Perspiration beaded on his brow, his cheeks rosy from running up the stairs, but he didn’t appear nearly as winded as she’d become in only six floors. Damn, how much stamina does it take to run up thirty-six flights of stairs—and 5


wouldn’t he rather use that energy for something else? He put his hand on her shin and felt his way down to her ankle, his brow furrowed. It surprised her that his hands were smooth, his touch gentle, and she watched him trace his fingers along her skin, his thumb circling around her ankle bone where her leg had started to swell. “Where does it hurt?” “Huh?” “You might be going into shock. I’ll radio an EMT.” “No, I’m okay.” In her fantasy, he would have flung her over his shoulder and had sex with her up against the wall. Of course, in her fantasy she wouldn’t have fallen on her ass. She would have been standing out on the street casually watching emergency response teams enter the building, and in her sexiest voice, she would have asked K. Thomas if he’d like to start a fire with her back at his place. “But you said your ankle might be broken.” “Yeah, I know, bad shoes and all. Don’t worry about it. Just help me up.” “I’m not sure that’s a good idea. You’ve had a fairly serious fall.” “No, I’m sure I’ll be okay. I can wiggle my toes, which obviously means it’s not broken like I originally thought.” Without asking, he pulled off her shoe. Thank God Gert’s little sister had forgotten her birthday and sent her a check two months late, which had bought her a recent pedicure. Her feet had never looked better, aside from the swelling in her ankle. Once again he ran his fingers along her flesh, this time 6


starting from her toes and moving up the back of her foot. Damn, it felt good. Not quite as soothing as the massage during her pedicure, but the little old woman named Tiang didn’t compare to well over six feet of hot, sexy man. “Okay, let’s see.” “See what?” He stared at her again as though she were a nut case. Poor thing didn’t realize just how hot he was and how one look at him reduced her IQ. “I want to see you move your ankle.” “Oh, okay.” Teeth gritted, she managed to move her toes back and forth and turn her ankle from side to side. “See?” “Pull your foot back.” “Okay.” She considered faking an injury and asking him to help her stand. If nothing else, she could shamelessly lean against him as she hobbled to the elevator and down to the lobby. Then he could call that EMT and maybe, just maybe, if he turned out as hot as the firefighter, she could fantasize about a rescue threesome. But she didn’t have to feign agony. The moment she pulled her foot back, hopes of a minor sprain vanished. “Mother of God,” she yelled, nearly collapsing flat onto her back. Dozens of very unladylike words popped into her mind, but thankfully stuck to the roof of her mouth and refused to come out. “Holy…hobbits!” Did I just say holy hobbits? “Hobbits, eh?” He grinned, the perfect, crooked expression on his tanned, handsome face. If a broken ankle didn’t kill her, his smile would stop her heart—and then he could give her 7


mouth to mouth to revive her. “You must be in a lot of pain with a mouth like that.” “I’m not fooling around,” she muttered. “It really hurts.” “I’m sorry.” His expression sobered and he nodded. With her shoe still in hand, he stood and gazed up the stairs, then down to the door he’d walked through when he found her. “Don’t worry, ma’am. I’ll stay with you until the EMTs arrive.” She tried to smile, but nothing made her feel more like a thirty-something spinster than the word ma’am. Just who was he to call her ma’am? So she lived alone and she had a cat. Nothing wrong with that, especially since she’d adopted him from the shelter and saved him from certain death. She practically had the title of a saint in the feline world. “Don’t call me ma’am,” she blurted out. His brows furrowed, and something about his expression looked oddly familiar, as though she’d seen him somewhere before. Maybe on her week-long stint at the gym she’d seen him jogging around the track. Or maybe when she’d gone with her sister to the Open House at the fire station they’d seen him driving the truck around the block. “I’m sorry, I should have asked for your name. That was rude of me, but I really didn’t think I’d find anyone in the stairwell.” “I don’t disappoint, do I?” “Not at all, Miss…” He’d think she was an old maid if she told him her name was Gertrude. Sometimes she wanted to strangle her parents 8


for naming her after her grandmother, though she loved her Grams. Playing with the end of her skirt, she stared up at him and decided to give him her middle name. “You can call me Suzie.” “Suzie.” He offered his hand. “I’m Kevin Thomas.” Her eyes went wide. She’d gone to school with a Kevin Thomas. Hell, she’d dated a hockey player her freshman year in high school and had gone back and forth, dating and breaking up with a guy named Kevin Thomas, though nothing serious had ever come out of it. The details as to why they hadn’t carried their relationship on to college were fuzzy, but she figured it probably wasn’t important. He hadn’t been the college type anyhow. This couldn’t be the same kid with bleach blond hair knotted into dreadlocks. His bad boy image had sucked her in after being an innocent, sheltered girl all through grade school and junior high. All she remembered was seeing Kevin, the new kid transplanted from across town, in freshman year, strutting into class and sitting a row in front of her. There had to be more men in the world named Kevin Thomas, though she knew, even without the dread locks, the raggedy punk band T-shirts, and the attitude oozing from every pore, this was the same guy. So that’s why he looked familiar… He took a seat beside her and removed his helmet, revealing short, light brown hair. She’d never known his real hair color, partially because he kept it bleached almost white and also because she’d never made it past second base with 9


him, not in four years of being his on again, off again girlfriend. Damn, it had been a long time since she’d seen him. And now this. What a reunion. Not that he’d recognize her without her homemade dresses and pin straight hair in two braids, face without a trace of makeup and absolutely no sense of fashion. Moving to the city had definitely changed her for the better. “So it looks like the alarm was only a test,” he said, tapping his fingers on his knees. It reminded her of how they’d spent most of their time together in her room while her older brother stood in the doorway and drilled him about hockey games until it was time for Kevin to return home. She’d forgotten about that. No wonder they’d never messed around much, with Tony always keeping an eye out for any kissing or fondling. “Yeah, funny, I guess.” He shrugged. “You’re our second known casualty from their impromptu fire drill.” “Good to know. I don’t feel like a complete moron.” “The first guy apparently got up too fast from his desk and hit his face on his cubicle wall. Broke his nose. Looked like hell, too.” Gert made a face, unable to decide if that was a freak accident or pure stupidity. It didn’t matter since Kevin wasn’t exactly whispering sweet nothings in her ear. “You know you did what you’re supposed to do when a fire alarm goes off,” he said, giving her a wide, almost cheesy 10


grin. Now that she remembered. The way he could soften up at all the right times when they were together, linking his little finger with hers and telling her how someday he was going to make her his forever, Mrs. Gertrude Thomas, always pulled at her heartstrings, if just for a moment. “I did?” “Yep. You should be proud of yourself.” She cocked a brow. “The fire department needs to revise their rules if they want everyone to fall down the stairs.”

11


CHAPTER 2 It didn’t surprise Kevin that Gertie Randall remained a smartass after all these years. Not pain, not humiliation, and certainly not even her skirt hiked up to reveal her white cotton panties could keep her mouth tamed. For a girl who’d always appeared sweet and innocent, she had spunk—and he’d wanted to take hold of her and never let go for as long as he could remember. And now he’d found her again a lifetime later, a sophisticated version of her former self complete with a nice rack and long, shapely legs he wanted wrapped around his head. He watched her link her fingers together, noticed the lack of a wedding band or engagement ring, and thought 12


someone needed to devise a twelve-step program for shaking the addiction he had to her. It had been too damn long since he’d last seen her and she constantly wriggled her way into his thoughts. Now he didn’t want her far from his mind. He wanted her beneath him, on top of him, in front of him…it didn’t matter, just as long as he had her naked, submissive, and in his bed. But he couldn’t let her know how she drove him crazy, at least not yet. If she wanted to play games, he’d play them, too. The bad boy he’d thought no longer existed threatened to come to life, both deep inside of him and in his pants where his cock began to throb. Damn, she looked hot, hotter than he’d ever imagined—and apparently she liked what she’d seen. “You look really familiar,” he commented, testing the waters. Her eyes widened, but her expression never fully changed. Inwardly he smiled because now he knew she recognized him, which gave him an advantage. He could mess with her all he wanted and she couldn’t do a damn thing about it without breaking character. “You see lots of women, I’m sure. And I bet you tell them all the same thing.” He shrugged and offered an easy smile. “It’s like you’ve known me my whole life.” “You’re just full of it. Lines, I mean. You’re full of pick up lines.” He looked her over, taking his time to notice every detail 13


about her until she gave a sigh of disgust, as though it were his fault that she’d decided to come to work in a revealing V-neck sweater that begged him to stare at her perfect breasts. “Well,” he said at last, “when a damsel in distress throws out a line like ‘holy hobbits,’ how could I resist?” Gert tried to hold back a smile, though it didn’t quite work and she turned away, swiping her bangs from her eyes like she used to when the situation made her nervous. “Um, how much longer do you think it’ll take to get an EMT on the scene stat?” she mumbled. “You don’t want me flat line or anything.” His brows rose. She watched way too many medical shows on television if she wanted to throw around words like “stat” or “flat line.” Disappointed that she wanted to get away from him, he climbed to his feet and thought a moment, wondering what he could say or do to keep her a moment longer. Apparently she hadn’t hit her head or gone into shock, other than the shock of seeing him again. Her ankle appeared sprained, her wrist, which she kept using to push her hair back, didn’t seem to bother her. Damn. No emergency and no reason to keep her. “I’ll check, though I don’t think you’re in danger of flat lining.” “Are you authorized to give medical advice?” “No.” “Then how would you know? I could keel over on these stairs any minute.” “Ma’am,” he said, “there is absolutely no reason to take that tone of voice with me. I’m checking on the status of help. 14


Stay calm and breathe normally.” He opened the fire door, walked down two sets of stairs, and peered through the window into the office building on the thirty-fourth floor. The place looked as though it had been abandoned a while back, but the former office tenants hadn’t bothered to take all of their junk. He hit his radio button once the door closed behind him and had a look around, careful not to step on cords or trip over office chairs. “Hey, Jerry. Kevin Thomas reporting.” “Go ahead, Thomas,” the dispatcher responded. Walking the length of the room, he parted the vertical blinds and squinted as sunlight glinted off the lake. White sailboats dotted the water and joggers took advantage of a beautiful day. “I have a woman up here who fell down the stairs.” “Nice. Head injury?” “Nah, twisted ankle.” “How far up is she?” “Thirty-sixth floor.” “Conscious?” “And talking my ear off.” “Oh, hell, she’s cute, isn’t she?” Kevin inhaled, his finger lingering over the call button. “Come up here with a stretcher and find out for yourself.” “No can do.” “Why not?” “Well, we thought we were all clear, so we sent three 15


ambulances away. Can you wait a few more minutes?” He walked around in a circle and pushed an abandoned leather chair across the carpeting bearing the indentations from a large desk. “She’s a little bit feisty.” “I knew we shouldn’t have sent Mr. September up alone.” Kevin rolled his eyes. He should have known that damn calendar would come back to bite him about a thousand times, mostly from Jerry, whose idea of repetitions were bites out of a danish, not weights. “Relax. I’ve got it under control. We went to high school together.” On the other end, Jerry grunted in interest. “Did you now? Then I guess you need a moment to rekindle the past.” Kevin hesitated just long enough, and Jerry busted out laughing. “Is this an old high school flame? No pun intended, firefighter.” “Will you get some help up here now?” “You’re certainly not denying it.” “Look, you son of a—” Jerry made fake static sounds into the radio. “What’s that, Kev? Can’t hear you. The signal must be cutting out.” More fake static sounds. “Looks like I’m about to lose you.” “Jerry, don’t you dare.” “Still can’t hear you. Don’t worry, Kev, help is on the way. Just keep the little lady comfortable.” Kevin ran his tongue along the inside of his cheek, his muscles tense. He’d wanted another moment alone with Gert, but Jerry had made it too easy for him to slip through the fire 16


door and to her side all over again. Their mutual friend Jackie wouldn’t believe this. She’d been in contact with him over the years, keeping him up to date with the rest of their friends, but she didn’t mention Gertie very often. In Jackie’s very outspoken opinion, Kevin needed to get a hold of himself and forget his high school crush. She told him, in rather lengthy and unnecessary conversations, that he should stop dwelling. He put on his game face and returned to the stairwell, where Gert had managed to move onto the steps. She cursed her damaged shoe, pausing in mid-sentence as he approached. “Help is on the way, right?” she asked cheerfully. “Yep.” Her smile faded into a deep set frown. “You’re lying to me.” His brows lifted. “Why would I lie to you?” “I have no idea, but you’re lying to me. Oh, my God, did you even call for help?” “Of course I called for help.” Maybe she had hit her head. “Then why aren’t they coming to get me?” He shifted his weight. “You’re not the only person injured in the, uh, fire drill.” “Which means?” Her cheeks had reddened, a sure sign she’d turned from calm to irate. “Relax. An ambulance is on the way.” With an exasperated sigh she began to chew on her fingernails. “What do we do in the meantime?” Images of her bent over the railing, doggie style on the 17


stairs, or with her back up against the wall filled his mind. He wanted her nibbling on his lower lip and earlobe, not her nails. “What do you want to do?” The pink in her cheeks brightened, but she looked away before he caught her smiling. “I just want to get out of here. These concrete stairs are cold, the floor is dirty, and the dust in the air is aggravating my allergies.” “Here.” He offered his hand and watched her do a double take for a wedding ring. “Fireman’s carry.” “You guys actually do that? In real life?” Her brother had made a joke of slinging her over his shoulder and throwing her into the pool, usually fully dressed, which had become the only firefighter’s carry she knew and hated. She had no idea what Kevin would do to her. “Of course we do.” Her toes curled and her knees spread a little wider as she shifted her weight. An inch or two more and he’d be able to see those white cotton panties again. “Are you carrying me back to my desk?” “Where’s the fun in that?” He pointed down the stairs. “The office below here looks like it’s under renovation. You could relax and wait for help.” “Dunner, Dunner, and Stacks,” she said. “They moved to the loft on the fiftieth floor a month ago once Jessica Stacks divorced Robert Dunner. I’ve heard they had a dispute over office furniture.” “Sounds ugly.” He pulled her to her feet and paused once she stood with 18


her breasts to his chest, her eyes looking up into his. It brought back memories of slow dancing in a high school gymnasium to really bad music while their teachers looked on. Holding her again sent unexpected electricity through his veins and he froze, wondering who would take the first step, who would be the first to speak. The longer he stared at her, the less he wanted to speak. He could say everything with one hard, deep kiss to the mouth. She wouldn’t know what hit her, not until she tasted him, felt his tongue push past her lips, his arms wrapped around her body. With each kiss he’d explore her, snake his hands beneath her clothes and cup her breasts, caress her sides and hips until she begged him for more. He’d leave her wet and trembling, barely able to catch her breath as he pulled her panties down her hips and inhaled the scent of her. And then… “How long do you think it will take?” “As long as you…wait, what?” He took a step back from her and removed his helmet, unable to believe how quickly he’d become entangled in fantasies. He ran his fingers through his hair. Picturing her almost naked had made him hard, but beneath his work clothes she’d never notice. “Oh, for the ambulance?” With a brow cocked, she looked him over. A wide, sexy smile spread across her face and she arched her back just enough for him to drop his gaze to her breasts and see her nipples strained against her thin V-neck, begging to be 19


touched and kissed. “What else would I be talking about?”

20


CHAPTER 3 He made it easier than she’d expected the moment he wrapped his arm around her and helped her down the stairs. All she had to do was lean against him and his grip tightened or he paused and asked if she felt light-headed or dizzy. “Should you have moved me?” “You didn’t appear to have a spinal or neck injury. I think you’re safe being mobilized.” “I think I’m better off immobilized.” Like tied up to a fire pole. “Alright.” “I think I should lie down,” she suggested, wondering if he heard a word she was saying. 21


“Right.” He took the next step and slowly eased her toward the bottom of the stairs. “You’re doing fabulous, Suzie.” She almost asked him who the hell Suzie was before she realized she’d given him that name as cover, even though it didn’t matter. Every time he turned and searched her eyes, she noticed the recognition, but she didn’t want to be the first to admit it. Childish, silly, completely unnecessary in execution, she still planned to play along as long as possible. It excited her to imagine seducing a perfect stranger even if underneath the ruse they’d known each other since high school. “Believe it or not, I am capable of walking down the stairs without falling.” “I have my doubts.” His sarcasm paired with a grin could have weakened her knees if she stared at him too long. “In that case, we should have bet on it.” He pushed the door open and held it with his foot as she limped in, still supporting her weight on his shoulder. “Just what would a girl like you have bet?” Who gets to be on top… She shrugged and tried to feign innocence despite the obvious suggestiveness of his question. “Something good.” “You have to elaborate.” His fingers curled around her hip like a vice. She gave him a sideways glance, her gaze trailing from his bright green belt up to his pale green eyes. Never had any man looked more like walking sex than a six-foot-three firefighter with shoulders that could fill a doorway and hips she wanted to bite. The door behind them closed with a hard thud, sealing out 22


the echo from the stairwell. She tensed once she realized they stood alone where no one would look for them. She had Kevin Thomas right where she wanted him—and if everything went as planned, she’d have him again and again. “Warm, moist, completely satisfying…” She paused and watched his expression change, wondering to herself if the erection he undoubtedly had achieved wanted to come out yet. “Brownies.” He swallowed hard and nodded. “I really love brownies,” he croaked. “Doesn’t everyone?” She hobbled toward a jazzy red couch with designs of saxophones and trumpets. It had to be just about the ugliest couch she’d ever seen, but it certainly matched the ugly modern art painting above it, both of which had thankfully remained in the graveyard of Dunner, Dunner, and Stacks. She stood and stared at the painting, which looked oddly familiar with its elongated reds and blues on a bright orange background. Two smaller, slightly round spots in blue accompanied the random smears of paint. “Do you know what I really like?” she asked. “Nuts in my brownies.” Kevin stood beside her and cocked his head to the side. He didn’t react as she expected him to, which made her think maybe she’d taken her baking seduction a little too far. It seemed like a shame since she had all sorts of jokes about cucumbers, bananas, popping cherries, and the like waiting to burst out. 23


“Is this what I think it is?” Kevin asked. He pointed at a name scribbled in green on the bottom right hand corner. “Does that say Caston Pollux?” She squinted, frustrated that he’d rather know the name of some crappy painter than fall under her clever spell. “I think it does. You know him?” “No, but I recognized his, uh, method of painting.” “It looks like a drunken monkey got a hold of a paintbrush.” “That’s not from a brush.” Gert leaned in closer and stared at the pathetic excuse for art. “Finger painting?” “Getting warmer. Elongated shapes and two misshapen circles.” Her mouth fell open. “No,” she gasped, drawing the word out. “Is that really his…no way.” “Yep. I saw something about him on the news a few months ago. He hangs the canvas waist high in his studio and becomes a human ink stamp. He called it exciting.” “I bet he did.” She jumped back from the penis art hanging above the ugly couch. “How creative.” “Now there’s a term for it.” He moved her hair off her shoulder and drew circles on her shirt with his fingertips, something she remembered him doing in high school. It had always calmed her when he gently touched her, like he could be soft inside while the rest of him appeared gruff. Once in a while he made her feel like she knew him better than anyone else ever could—and then they wouldn’t talk again for weeks. 24


“Sets the mood, doesn’t it?” His fingers skimmed down to the middle of her back and circled the notches in her spine one by until he reached her hips. “We might have a difficult time finding a blank canvas and paints,” he murmured in her ear. Goose bumps rose along her arms, and she turned her face toward his. Perfect, moist lips lingered inches from hers, while heavily lidded eyes gazed down at her. He played with the ends of her hair as his fingers inched up her back, treating her spine like a ladder until he reached her neck. “Yeah,” she said. “We’d need a different gratuitous scheme for our artwork.” She couldn’t breathe as he stroked the sensitive nape of her neck, the pads of his long, thick fingers callused and delicious. He massaged the base of her skull until his palm cupped the back of her head and tingles fizzed through her body like miniature sparklers ignited all at once. With her pain forgotten, she stood, one hand wrapped around his heavy coat, the other tightly balled in a fist, and enjoyed how natural it felt. Fingers spread, he continued to massage her until she realized she’d begun to breathe again, finding herself relaxed in his arms. Kissing him no longer seemed like an option. It had become a necessity, a vital part of her existence. She started to reach for his face, to draw him to her, when he pulled his hand away from her, raking his fingers through her hair. “You should probably take the pressure off your ankle,” he 25


suggested, his voice low and hoarse. For a firefighter, he seemed a little too good at putting out fires, namely the one growing between her legs. Chewing on her lower lip, she examined the ugly red couch and the penis art. Closer to the window the former renters had left an eggplant purple velvet couch complete with ungodly gold throw pillows. Not the ideal, but better. “Over there,” she said. Still leaning on Kevin, she hopped toward the purple couch and collapsed on the overstuffed cushions. Tiny brass bells sewn onto the pillows jingled as she sprawled out, resting one leg on the arm rest and bending the other. Her skirt inched up, allowing him a view he couldn’t deny. “Now what?” she asked as she tucked her hands behind her head. He shrugged out of his heavy jacket and tossed it over an armchair. For the first time since she’d seen him, he allowed her a view of what he’d been hiding under his gear. Outlined beneath a snug fitting gray T-shirt, his abs and chests tormented her from a distance, while his shoulders alone were worthy of praise. She’d dated this guy before? No way… As if he had no idea how damn sexy he looked, he removed his hat, tossed it aside, and sat down at the end of the couch. He finally forced his gaze from the apex of her thighs to her ankle. “I should probably examine you. Or, more specifically, your ankle.” “Are you qualified to examine me?” 26


Kevin cleared his throat. “I’ve had basic first aid training.” “Then examine away. Do you need me to do anything?” He gripped her foot. “Just tell me when to stop if I hurt you or something.” Her heart drummed in her chest as he palpitated her foot and inched his way up to her ankle. “Anything?” “Keep going.” He stroked the inside of her ankle and gently flexed it back, then forward, stopping before he’d manipulated it to the point of pain. “Still good?” “Just fine.” With one hand on her toes and other around her ankle, he slowly rotated her foot until she inhaled sharply. His gaze met hers, but he didn’t apologize or ask if it had hurt. Instead he watched her and stroked her arch, moving from her heel to the ball of her foot. Her lips parted in surprise at how good it felt. Normally she didn’t like anyone touching her Fred Flintstone feet with all of her scars from chicken pox, mosquito bites, and summers at the beach. But this felt too damn good to deny herself. “Kevin,” she whispered. His hands moved up her leg to her knee and thigh as he leaned into her. Like a hunter bearing down on its prey, he knelt over her, his breath hot on her cleavage peeking through her V-neck sweater. He kissed her chest and neck, then pressed his lips to hers 27


for a hard, unexpected kiss that stole her breath. She arched her back until her body met his, and the electricity in his kiss left her groaning and helpless as she pushed her hips further up. Almost immediately she felt him, hard and ready for more than a kiss. They’d never gone all the way, but she remembered the feel of him against her belly and the less glamorous days of him fitted against her, the length of his cock pressed between her legs and directly against her clitoris. Back then she’d never imagined it could get much better, but now she wanted all of him. His shoulder and back muscles strained beneath her fingers as she ran her hands down the length of his smooth, hard back. With one leg hooked around his, she kept him close, claimed him with wordless aggression. He’d gotten away from her once, which had been her fault. This time she wouldn’t give him up without a fight. Kevin wrapped his arm around her and tugged at her sweater while she wrestled with his shirt, managing to pull it over his head in record time. “Looks like I win.” He kissed her bare, flat stomach, partially exposed by her hiked up sweater, and eyed her. “I guess that’s a matter of perspective because right now I’m not doing too bad either.” “Not at all.” His hand ran up her thigh again until he reached her soaked panties. He touched her through her underwear, traced along her cleft and all the way to her ass, then back again. Sensory overload left her boneless, her eyes closed and lips 28


parted as she shivered with desire for his touch. But all at once she recovered her senses and slipped her hand into his dark trousers until the heat of his body and the tickle of silky coarse hair brushed her fingertips. She stroked around his cock, exploring the definition of his hips and the weight of his testicles first. He shifted his weight, resting on his side while she unzipped him and felt his dick harden all the more once she allowed him more room. His hips flexed, his breath harsh and frantic for her. Kevin rubbed her harder through the damp cotton between her legs. Her knees spread to his touch, back arched until she thought she might burst from the buildup of pressure low in her belly. “Make me come,” she begged him. She pumped him faster in her fist and made no attempt to stay quiet as he used the heel of his hand and rubbed against her soaked pussy and engorged clit. Their voices echoed through the abandoned office space until all she could hear was his voice speaking her name. “Gert, oh, Gert,” he breathed. It had been a long time since he’d said her name. She’d never expected him to say it again, especially like this. His gravelly tone unraveled her, and she squeezed her eyes shut as he brought her to climax, her body convulsing beneath him. His balls tightened as she groaned and let him know how much pleasure he’d given her. With several more hard strokes he came in her hand, her name still on his lips, his body belonging to her once more. 29


Still unable to catch his breath, he rested his forehead on her shoulder and kissed her upper arm, while she ran her fingers through his damp hair and breathed him in, the smell of shampoo and sex in the air. “When did you know?” she asked. “Know what?” “You just called me Gert.” He lifted his head, his eyes narrowed. “What was I supposed to…oh.” “Yeah. Oh. Looks like someone slipped up.” Anger flitted in his gaze, but he still kissed her on the lips. In the past he would have been reckless, a thrill of anger and rebellion that had attracted her in the first place. It no longer seemed to exist in him—or he’d learned to put it to better use. “You were the one who said I should call you Suzie.” “But you agreed.” He shrugged and maneuvered onto his side where he wrapped his arm around her and secured their places on the couch. “I guess I did.” “But why’d you agree?” “Maybe I liked the idea of hooking up with a pretty stranger.” He nuzzled her, his tongue flicking against her jaw line while he kneaded her breast. “Besides, it turned into a satisfying slip up, didn’t it?” Gert smiled. “Not bad.” Pressed between her legs, his dick jumped to life again. “What can I do better?” “Do you have a condom?” 30


“In my wallet.” She reached between their bodies and rubbed her thumb over the head of his cock, feeling him twitch in response. “Then let’s make our own artwork.”

31


CHAPTER 4 A shadow darkened the length of the room just as Gert rearranged herself. Two window cleaners lowered from the floor above and paused, both of the men laughing over something as they cleaned their squeegees. She started to turn her head to the side and speak, but Kevin closed his lips over hers and she forgot her train of thought. His hips moved against hers, his breaths hard and fast as she explored his back with her hands, memorizing the long, taut muscles right down to his perfectly round ass. He nibbled on her lower lip as she pulled him closer, wanting every inch of him against her. With one arm beneath her, he hiked up her skirt and 32


caressed her thigh, his touch firm and commanding, his long, warm fingers urging her to wrap her legs around him. “Kevin?” she whispered. His lips left hers and focused on her throat, kissing and sucking on her tender flesh until she’d almost forgotten she’d started to ask him a question. “What is it, Gert? You want me to talk dirty to you?” She chuckled to herself, sprawled out on the couch with him draped over her. “No—well, yeah, if you want. I just wondered if those two guys could see us.” He turned his head and studied the window washers as they began their work. Neither of the two men dressed in dirty overalls paid attention to the job at hand as they continued their conversation and gestured toward the lake. “Maybe.” Another rush of arousal soaked her panties at the thought of the two men getting the show of their lives directly through an office window thirty-six floors above the city. Kevin cupped her breast through her sweater, his thumb teasing her nipple. He looked from her to the window and back again. “You like that?” She followed his gaze to the window where the two men still hadn’t noticed them. Her heart raced as she waited for one of them to turn, his eyes wide as he realized two people had found an abandoned office floor for the afternoon. “Do you?” “I like the idea of having all the fun while someone else can only watch.” 33


Gert traced the seam of his lips with the pad of her thumb and smiled. “Wanna give them something to remember?” The tip of his cock pressed hard between her legs and she tilted her head back, allowing him to kiss her throat. “I take that as a yes?” He sat up and brought her with him, cradling her in his arms until they both collapsed into a leather chair fit for an executive. In a frenzy of eager kisses and soft caresses, he somehow managed to slide her panties off and fling them aside, leaving her naked, damp flesh against his lap. She reached down and stroked him as he arranged her on his lap until he fit her legs around his waist. While he gripped her sides and fondled her breasts, she rolled the condom down his length and caressed his sac, feeling it tighten as she leaned into him. Kevin pushed the wheeled office chair across the plush carpet, the squeaks of castors grinding almost lost to their groans and sighs. She leaned back, her thighs propped up on the arm rests, her hands linked around his neck. She’d never felt so vulnerable and ready, spread wide just for him. They inched out of the shadows. Kevin propelled them forward, each thrust of his legs teasing her with his cock pressed to her pussy, sliding across her slick opening. Dust motes swirled around them, and sunlight warmed her back the moment he pulled her sweater over her head and tossed it aside. Wide, male hands cupped her breasts and unhooked her bra in the front, the fullness of her body spilling into his grasp. Using his teeth, he pulled her bra straps down her slender 34


shoulders and planted kisses on her with his warm, smooth lips. She wanted him to kiss her everywhere, head to toe. She needed to feel his lips against her collarbone, his teeth grazing her belly button, his tongue prying her open and sucking on her juices until her legs trembled and a climax ripped through her. “Kevin, I need you,” she whispered, cupping his face in her hands. His scent filled her, the familiar musk that brought her back to a boy turned man. He lifted his hips in answer and left her quivering, her breath leaving her lungs as a whimper of total surrender. She gripped his shoulders, her fingers bunched around his corded muscles. Straightening her legs, she lowered as he pushed upward, the head of his cock entering her. She sighed in relief as he filled her with one hard thrust that lifted both of them from the chair. Together they came down hard, the chair rocking back where it slammed into the wall. Her toes curled as he pumped her, his hands gripped tight around her narrow waist just above the swell of her hips. She’d never been wanted with such urgency—and she didn’t know if she’d ever wanted a man more than she wanted Kevin inside of her, grinding against her sensitive clit, filling her with each tilt of his hips. “Don’t stop,” she begged, allowing him to guide her, wanting nothing more than to hold on and enjoy the ride. “I’m not a teenager, Gert.” He pressed his forehead to hers and smiled. “I can last a hell of a lot longer than two minutes.” 35


Kevin reached beneath her and cupped her ass, supporting her weight as she held him. The back of the chair slammed against the wall and rattled the artwork until Gert swore someone would hear them and come in to investigate. It reminded her of the window washers. She turned her head to the side, glancing over her shoulder to see both men still talking as they worked. She couldn’t tell if they’d noticed and decided to look the other way, or if they couldn’t see through the tinted glass. As if he realized her thoughts, Kevin pushed the chair forward and they went flying, spinning around like a Tilt-AWhirl. She landed hard on him, feeling him so deep inside of her she could barely breathe. A rush of excitement left her rigid with the first pulses of a much needed orgasm, and she stilled, waiting for the pressure to build and overwhelm her. A yelp of surprise left her lips as her back touched a warm, smooth surface. She opened her eyes to Kevin and saw his face washed in warm sunlight, the natural golden highlights in his short hair matching the streaks in his pale eyes. With a smile, he lifted her up, wrapping her legs around his hips as he stood and pressed her back to the glass. “Holy—” “Hobbits,” Kevin finished, pinning her to the window with each hard thrust. He captured her mouth with his and claimed each of her screams, his tongue filling her mouth as his cock pushed deeper into her, each stroke keeping her suspended. She locked her arms around his shoulders and moved with him, no longer concerned with her audience. 36


Eyes open, she found Kevin watching her, his gaze dark and intense. She became aware of their bodies connected, belly to belly, her breasts against his chest, his hands spread beneath her, holding her up. Clenching her vagina, she made it impossible for him to hold on a moment longer, and she noticed the strain beneath his eyes, the desire to pleasure her as long as possible fading into his own needs. “I want you,” she murmured. “All of you.” He kissed her hard again, pumping her against the glass until he stilled and she felt him pulse against her, the rhythm of their mutual releases like two hearts beating in time. She threaded her fingers through his hair and massaged his scalp, groaning in pleasure as they sank to the carpet and he guided her onto his lap. “Gertie,” he said, his voice a low hush. The tone of his voice made her inch closer to him until his thighs pressed against hers. She didn’t want to miss a moment of him, not a single breath or word. “I never thought I’d have the chance to be with you.” “If I’d known it would be like this, I would have lost my virginity four years earlier.” He kissed her nose and mouth, smiling against her lips while he played with her hair and made her scalp tingle. “How’s the ankle?” They stretched out on the carpet, and from the corner of her eye she saw the window washers had stopped working. Grinning, she traced Kevin’s swollen lips before she kissed 37


him again, shivering as he sucked the tip of her index finger. “Did I do something to my ankle?”

38


CHAPTER 5 Four hours in the Emergency Room and confirmation of a sprained ankle gave Gert plenty of time to pout and seek Kevin’s deepest sympathies. She’d sat in the waiting room with her foot propped up on his lap and then had moved into a triage room with him at her side, which she knew made the nurses work a little harder to make her comfortable. All of the women, especially the older women, seemed to adore him, and on more than one occasion Gert caught the nurses scrutinizing her. “So,” she said as he wheeled her back through the waiting room, “come here often?” “You have no idea.” 39


“The staff loves you.” “The staff loves the free donuts I’ve brought from the station.” “I think it might be something else.” She looked up and caught him smiling. “Nope, when it comes to free donuts, I’m a man whore.” They passed through a set of double doors and into the ambulance drive where two trucks were parked, their engines humming as they waited for calls. Kevin parked her at the curb and put the brakes down to keep her from rolling into ER traffic. Keys in hand, he told her to wait—as though she had a choice—and he’d pull the car around. She bit her lip and watched him walk through the parking lot, his gait long and confident, perfectly suited to a firefighter. The wail of sirens in the distance made her shiver, and she held her breath, imagining Kevin answering the call to the scene. Images she didn’t want flitted through her mind, thoughts of him trapped in a burning building, the roof coming down on him twelve feet from the door where the rest of the volunteers and full-timers from his firehouse had escaped. Unintentionally she stepped down on the concrete with her injured foot and cursed under her breath. She touched her left shoulder where she’d had her brother’s name tattooed six months after he’d died in a public housing fire. While she stood beside her mother and her father, the only one in the family who’d never shed a tear over Tony, she swore she’d never, ever get involved with a fireman. They 40


were heartache waiting to happen. They were a lifetime of long nights spent awake wondering if a call would come in and tell her the worst. She couldn’t bear hearing the news twice, once regarding her brother and again from a boyfriend or husband. But this didn’t count. She wouldn’t get involved with him, at least not seriously. All she had to do was reel in her heart and keep it from skimming along the surface of love. In the end, she’d protect both of them. “Now is not the time,” she murmured to herself. They had too much fun together to think of anything else. The sirens faded and she thought of how Kevin had raced up the stairs of her building. It made her smile to think of his expression when he first found her. Kevin pulled up and turned on his hazard lights, which flashed against the brick wall. He tossed her crutches into the trunk, then practically hefted her over his shoulder and carried her back to her car, which two of her coworkers had been nice enough to drop off for her on their lunch break. The air freshener hanging from the rearview mirror released a burst of strawberry-scented air as he fired up the heater, which made her acutely aware of her dolled up Toyota. While the rest of her had grown up, her car, which she’d bought two years ago, had a hula dancer on the dashboard and several strands of Mardi Gras beads swaying from the rearview mirror, most of which tangled with the air freshener. “You know what sounds good right now?” he asked, watching her from the corner of his eye as he pulled out onto 41


the street. “A triple scoop strawberry sundae.” She tapped the air freshener with her finger. “That’s the fake strawberry talking.” “Well, I sort of like what the fake strawberry is saying.” He eyed her with a seductive smile. “Besides, strawberries always remind me of you.” “They do?” “Of course they do.” She wanted to ask how in the hell he kept his body tight when just thinking about a triple scoop sundae gave her thighs dimples, but her stomach growled in defiance and her mouth watered with the thought of spooning creamy vanilla ice cream drizzled with strawberry sauce into Kevin’s mouth, then planting a kiss on his lips to taste the sundae and him, the perfect combination. Her Matrix swerved into the local custard stand, which was surprisingly crowded for early evening. Apparently it had become perfectly acceptable to eat ice cream before dinner— not that she wanted to complain once she caught sight of groups of families and friends crowded around tables with ice cream cones in hand. “Please tell me you plan on eating something.” He entered the drive-thru lane and tapped his fingers on the inside of the driver’s door. “It won’t necessarily stop me, but I’d feel bad eating alone.” “Do you think they have salads?” Kevin glared at her. “I think I might kick you out of your car for suggesting a salad at a custard shop.” 42


She grabbed his knee and gave it a squeeze. “You’ve convinced me with your threats.” They ordered at the menu board and slowly pulled forward toward the window where a snotty teenager with more nose piercings than should have been allowed shoved their order through the window and then dropped half his change onto the ground. Gert started to lean forward and tell the little pixie off, but Kevin pulled into a spot at the back of the small parking lot and opened the brown bag where his triple scoop sundae and extra cup of strawberry sauce waited. “That looks good,” she commented. “Too late. You get what you ordered.” Doing her best pout, she unlatched her seat belt and leaned into him. “You won’t even give me a lick out of pity for my sprained ankle?” “It’s a sprain, not an amputation.” “Oh, well, thanks.” With a sly smile, he held up the cup of strawberry sauce. “This is for you.” “What if I don’t like strawberries?” “Oh, you will.” He set the cup on the dashboard and dug into his ice cream while she nibbled on her dipped cone and wondered what he was up to. Imagining it was him in her mouth, she swirled her tongue around the hardened chocolate outside and waited for him to look at her. After what they’d done in the office, she couldn’t imagine him denying her in the car. She licked her way down to the cone and sighed, doing everything in her power to make 43


him turn and eye her, but he tipped the plastic container and slurped down sauce and ice cream that had melted in the cup. “A-ha. So that’s what they mean by ‘wolfed it down.’” He licked his lips and turned to face her. “Ice cream is my weakness. Well, one of them.” Too impatient to wait for him to make his move, she arched a brow and parted her knees. “What else do you like to eat?” A wide grin spread across his lips. “You don’t remember?” Kevin stretched his arm out and stroked the nape of her neck with his fingertips, his touch soft and gentle. “I’m not really the same person I was the last time we saw each other.” Sinking lower in her seat, she reached across and rested her hand on his knee, feeling his legs spread wider. “I bet Star Wars is still your favorite movie.” “Well, yeah. Why wouldn’t it be? Have you seen the crap they’ve put out in theaters lately?” “At least I still know you through the dark side.” Kevin nodded and curled a strand of her hair around his finger. “We’ve only hinted at my dark side.” Her nipples responded first, then she clenched her thighs as her heartbeat finally caught up with the rest of her body. “You want me to believe a guy who orders a triple scoop sundae has a dark side?” Without a word, he leaned forward and kissed her, his lips sticky and sweet, his mouth warm and inviting. She closed her eyes and sighed as he pushed her hair back from her face and caressed the shell of her ear. 44


“Not yet convinced?” he murmured. “You can convince me right now.” Unaccustomed to sitting in the passenger seat, she fumbled to recline her chair and shimmy into the backseat like a horny teenager out for a date. Somehow she managed to crawl between the front seats, only hitting her head on the ceiling once and catching her shoe on the cup holder in the back. She managed to swing her bum leg to the side and avoid hitting it on either seat with Kevin’s help guiding her back. She rested the back of her head against the window and watched him maneuver into the back seat with her. Unlike her, he hit his head on the dome light and nearly collapsed on top of her. “You’ll be the next one in the ER,” she teased. “I’ve got a hard head.” “I bet you do.” Kevin arched a brow. “I guess you’ll find out.” He settled with one leg between hers, his breaths hot against her cheek. Shadows darkened his face and eyes, and she reached up to touch him, memorize the curve of his nose once broken in a hockey game, his strong jaw covered in stubble, his kissable neck she wanted to wrap her arms around and never let go. Kevin lowered his head and kissed her neck until she writhed beneath him. She pulled at his shirt and ran her hands up and down his back, clinging to him and every inch of his flesh. He took his time and kissed his way from her neck to her 45


shoulder as she arched her back, pressing herself to him. No matter how much he gave her, she wanted more of him. “I really, really want to make your Death Star explode, preferably in my deep space.” “God damn, woman, you know how to turn a man on.” With a smile, she hummed the theme to Star Wars, doing her best to keep from laughing as he reached her navel and tickled her with his tongue. Her song ended as he gripped her thigh and pulled her right leg up, resting her heel on the back seat. He knelt in front of her and kissed the inside of her thigh until she could do nothing more than groan, her head tossing back and forth as he ran his finger along her panties. “Imagine if I were dressed in the slave costume from Return of the Jedi.” “Trust me. I already have.” Gert bunched up her skirt and bit her lower lip in anticipation as he pulled her legs apart. With her spine curled and good foot planted on the cubby hole between the front seats, she managed to draw herself up. He took his time and touched the inside of her thigh with his tongue, drawing circles on her sensitive flesh. Every maddening second sent surges of frustration through her as he pressed harder, then issued light, feathery strokes. She knew each stroke was a promise of what he’d do to her once he removed her underwear. “Close your eyes.” “Why? Don’t want me to see your light saber?” He chuckled against the apex of her thighs and inched her 46


cotton panties down, giving her no choice but to hold on for the ride. His hot breath and even hotter lips touched her, made her shiver and gasp in anticipation of him fucking her with his tongue. “Not just yet.” “Why not?” “Because.” He blew warm air between her opened thighs, then drizzled something cool onto her throbbing clit. She started to close her legs, but he brought his finger to her lips and gave her a taste of strawberry. “I want to play with you first.” Her breath left her lungs as he pressed his tongue firmly against her clitoris and closed his lips around it, sucking hard until she grabbed a handful of his hair. She couldn’t decide if she wanted to wrap her legs around his head, or part her knees and beg him to touch her everywhere. He gave her no time to think as he thrust his tongue into her, causing her body to jerk in response. Once again he turned his attention to her clitoris and licked circles around her sensitive flesh, then dragged his tongue along her engorged lips and pushed into her again. Her hips rose, sliding him deeper. Pulling out, he flicked his tongue against her clit until she spasmed and jerked against his face. “Who would you be right now?” she panted. He kissed his way up her stomach and chest, biting at her shoulder and neck. His musk filled the car, the familiar essence of sex that made her wrap her arms around his neck. “Han Solo. From Empire Strikes Back.” 47


“Perfect.” “If you’ve had a Star Wars fantasy, too, I’ll marry you right here.” “In the back of my car?” “Would you prefer a convention?” “I’d prefer you showing me what else you could do with your tongue. Or better yet…” She reached for his belt, which she immediately unhooked and pulled free. The buckle clanked against the seat cushion and her knuckles while she unbuttoned his jeans and unzipped him. He ravaged her with kisses, his body sliding over hers until he covered her completely, his pelvis pressing down on hers. Somehow in the sudden frenzy of caresses he managed to pass her a condom, which she immediately ripped open. The moment between rolling it down the length of his cock and feeling the first hard thrust blurred. It didn’t matter how long they made love, she needed to feel him inside of her, to know he needed her as much as she needed him. Gert rose to meet him, her fingers tangled in his thick hair as she drew his mouth to hers and kissed him hard. She groaned beneath him, felt his muscles tense as he tried to hold on a moment longer. Groaning, she reached down his back, dragging her nails along his spine until she reached his tight, round butt. “I want to feel you come,” she whispered. The car rocked, pounded to their beat, and he growled against her lips. His pace quickened into a dizzying rhythm 48


that sent her over the edge. With one more intense thrust he let out a groan and settled over her, his pelvis slowly moving against hers until she milked him dry. For a long while she lay beneath him and stroked his hair and ears, tracing his jaw and his lips as she gazed up at him. He kissed her eyelids and forehead, a tender exchange between two people who didn’t need to speak. He’d become impossible to resist. She felt the pull of him each time she dared to look into his eyes and see the grown-up version of her high school boyfriend. The clean-cut, more responsible Kevin definitely stole her breath much more than the rebel hockey player ever could—and it frightened her. Temporary relationship, only for fun and nothing else. “How long have you been a firefighter?” she asked at last, struggling to sit up. Once she spoke, she realized she didn’t want to know how long he’d been risking his life for others. He shrugged. “Volunteered in high school with your brother. You don’t remember that?” His mention of Tony startled her. She could still see her older brother bounding into the house after his first real fire, how his eyes were red from the smoke, his hands still trembling as he told her about the rush and how he’d never felt fear and elation as strong as he had chopping down the door of a burning house. “We’d probably broken up by then.” The lips she could spend hours kissing parted in question, but he didn’t speak. Instead he ran his fingers through his hair and sighed, using his hand to wipe the fogged up back 49


window. “I don’t know if I’d call it breaking up.” “What would you call it?” He looked at her again with his soft, inviting eyes and an easy, almost forlorn smile. “Growing apart.” And now he was trying to weave himself back into her heart where he definitely didn’t belong and into her life where she had plenty of room, all of it topped with a heaping spoonful of selfish fear. “Is that what happened?” “Well, your exact words were a bit scathing, so yeah, I’m going to stick with growing apart.” “What did I—” His lips closed over hers and silenced her at once, giving her no chance to speak, let alone think. She melted into his embrace, figuring the past was the past and the present was a hell of a lot more fun. “Whatever I said I was wrong,” she mumbled. “Good, because now…” He kissed her again, his tongue pushing past her lips, his arms around her as they slid down into the comfortable darkness. They fit together, arms and legs, mouths and hips, and as she felt his pulse on the side of his neck, their reconnection made it impossible for her to imagine it all coming to an end. It would only take one arson, one bad floorboard, one second too late leaving the building. One heartbeat, his heartbeat, and it could all be over—ashes to ashes, dust to dust. As if to mock her, sirens blared in the distance, the 50


mournful call of urgency. She couldn’t take it anymore and pushed on his chest. “Now what?” Kevin wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled her neck, his body draped over hers, their fit snug and perfect. “Now I’ve run into you again and it just feels…like I can try again with you, do everything I’m supposed to do.” He kissed her forehead, and she closed her eyes. Had he been a romantic all those years ago? Tough, dangerous, always in trouble fit his description, but hopelessly in love didn’t quite fit the bill. “And what would that be?” “Whatever it takes. I don’t plan on making the same mistake twice, Gertie.”

51


CHAPTER 6 By the time they reached her apartment building, Gertie felt ready to collapse. Kevin parked her car and helped her to the elevator and down the hall of the sixth floor toward her unit, where she could already hear her cat Waffle demanding his dinner and attention. “Do you like cats?” she asked as Waffle pranced into the hallway and rubbed against Kevin’s leg, completely ignoring the woman who had not only saved him from using up the last of his nine lives at the shelter, but who also fed him only the best organic cat food available. He’d not only been rescued, but he ate like kitty cat royalty and snubbed her every chance he got, the ungrateful little beast. 52


“I consider myself more of a dog person.” Kevin scooped up the cat and scratched him under the chin, seemingly oblivious to the cat hair flying around him. Waffle continued to purr and rub up against his new best buddy, glancing every so often in Gert’s direction. She swore he glared at her to make sure she saw how easily she could be replaced. “But this guy seems cool.” “Good, because he probably won’t leave you alone for the rest of the night.” He put the cat down in the foyer, while Gert hobbled into the kitchen to feed the mewling feline and take cold sodas out of the fridge. While he straddled a chair, Kevin looked on and studied the collage of photos she had stuck to the fridge, some of them dating back to high school and college. “Did you get the invite to Carleena and Ben’s barbeque?” she asked, while he continued to stare at the refrigerator. He blinked once, then turned to face her. “I did, but it’s sort of far away and on short notice.” She nodded. Ever since Ben and Carlie had finally hooked up—which was twenty years in the making—one of her best friends in high school had been chattering nonstop about the new love of her life. Now that she’d found Kevin again, she wondered how Ben, Carleena, and the rest of their old crew would react to high school sweethearts getting back together. No one would have believed they lived in the same city only a few blocks away from one another and hadn’t met until a freak accident. Or, maybe they would believe she fell on her ass and 53


Kevin happened to be standing by. “Are you okay?” she asked when he still seemed to be spacing out. “Tired.” He rubbed his hand over his face and stifled a yawn. “You’re exhausting, woman. I don’t know how much longer I can keep this up.” Standing on her toes, she lifted her brows and tried to get a look at his crotch, which made him smile. “Trust me, I have no problem keeping that up.” One little phrase and he made her tingle all over from deep in her womb to the tips of her breasts. She wanted to feel him suckle her again, taste the distinct flavor of his mouth once he crawled up her body, and have him touch her, his hands strong and commanding—the powerful hands of a rebel boy turned responsible man. She slid into her chair and crossed one leg over the other, creating pressure around her clit that refused to be sated until Kevin could do it for her. “Do you want to call it a night and crash here?” His eyes narrowed. “Do you think I’d sleep if I were lying beside you all night?” That was it. She couldn’t resist him, not when he looked at her with a twinkle in his green eyes and offered her his most devilish smile. For him she would have done anything—and she wanted him to do everything to her, no holds barred. “Well, you could be on the bottom and I could do all the work.” The cadence of his breathing changed, and she knew she 54


had him. It had been a long time since she’d enjoyed sex three times in the same day, and if she could keep Kevin stowed away with her a while longer she had a feeling she could break her personal best record of seven. After all, who really needed to work? Or eat…or sleep… As far as she was concerned real life was for wussies. He sucked in a breath through his teeth. “Tell me more.” “You want to know how I’d take you straight from the bath, lay you down in my room, and knead your tired, aching muscles until you were completely relaxed?” “Then what would you do?” “Well, once I had you dried off completely, I’d want you to make me all wet with your tongue—” He leaned over the table to meet her for a kiss when his beeper went off and startled her. She managed to lightly peck him on the lips before he dug his pager out of his pocket and sighed. “I need to run.” No, she wanted to tell him. I’m all fired up and I need you, my big, sexy fireman, to hose me down before I turn into ash. “Oh,” she said instead. Waffle jumped up onto the kitchen table and head butted Kevin one last time, then turned around for every cat’s favorite show of affection—kitty butt. Kevin stood, apparently oblivious to Waffle’s attempts at mooning him, and patted down his pockets in search of keys, which he produced with a frown as he looked at the keychain bearing twelve loyalty cards from various supermarkets, pharmacies, book stores, and pet stores. So she liked getting 55


discounts. “You drove my car,” she reminded him, taking her keys back with a sheepish grin as he flipped through the tiny plastic cards. He winced. “Yeah, my bike is still at the station.” “Bike?” “Harley, not a ten-speed.” Proof that part of the bad boy still existed. She stood and smiled, imagining him straddling a big silver bike, clad in a black leather jacket and jeans that would show off his perfect, tight ass. Now she really didn’t want him to leave. “Where are you going?” He swung toward the front door. “Fire. The station is only a few blocks away. I can jog there if I can’t catch a cab.” He glanced at his watch, then back up at her. “Are you taking tomorrow off with your bum ankle?” “I haven’t decided yet.” “Well, I don’t know if I’ll see you afterward.” Her heart raced in a completely different way. No longer did she feel the thrum of blood rushing through her to all the best parts like liquid flame teasing her every desire. Now she felt the familiar churn bubbling inside of her, the cold, heaviness she’d felt for so long after Tony passed away. “Why would you say that?” she demanded. He gave her a quizzical look. “Because it’s pretty late.” How could he possibly want to look out for her when he should have been thinking of his own personal safety? She 56


wanted to grab him by the arms and shake him, tell him he’d better go through every step to come back to her in one piece. And alive. She couldn’t take another parade to honor one of the city’s heroes. “Be careful,” she blurted out, chasing after Kevin with her injured ankle high in the air, fighting the urge to pounce on him and tell him to stay right there with her—or worse, just throw her crutch at him and hope she knocked him out. He glanced at her from over his shoulder and paused, turning to face her again. His expression softened and he wrapped his arms around her, his fingers tracing lines down her spine. “Always.” Her grip on him tightened as though somehow she could meld their bodies together and keep him from going back to the station. When she inhaled, she swore she caught the faintest hint of wood smoke on his T-shirt when all she really wanted to smell was them together, the distinct cologne of a man and a woman. “I mean it.” “So do I.”

57


CHAPTER 7 All night long she heard sirens blaring as she sat on the balcony with Waffle curled up in her lap. With summer gone and the nights cool and crisp, she no longer had to worry about mosquitoes eating her alive. This had always been her favorite time of year for as long as she could remember, but tonight the smell of smoke threatened her tranquility. Fireplaces burned in restored old houses several streets away. She gripped her mug of tea and inhaled chamomile and lemon, trying to block out the pain from her throbbing ankle and the headache from her racing mind. Each time she heard the distinct rumble of a motorcycle a 58


few streets away she perked up and waited for Kevin to drive up and tell her he’d decided to stay the night. She missed the smell of him on her, the way he exhaled on the column of her throat and made her shiver all over. The muscles in her vagina tightened as she thought of how damn good he looked in his uniform. If only she could convince him to quit and just keep the fireman getup because it definitely made her hot. What woman hadn’t had a fantasy about a hard-chested fireman busting down a door and carrying her away? Her cell phone beeped with an incoming text message, and she fished it out from beneath her blanket and flipped it open. An icon of mail spilling out of a mailbox flashed on the screen along with the name Jackie beneath it. She rolled her eyes thinking, between Jackie visiting their long-time friend Garrett on the east coast and Carleena’s new relationship with Ben, her cell phone charges for sending out text messages would be further up the wazoo than she could possibly pay. After several seconds she downloaded a picture of Garrett asleep in bed with a gigantic dog beside him. The dog had a cigar in its mouth and its paw across Garrett’s chest. Obviously in need of an explanation, she texted back a question mark and waited for a reply, hoping her former lab partner didn’t have a creepy dog fetish she never knew about. Her phone buzzed again with a new message that read, Tell me again why I got a nipple lift. She rubbed at her eyes and decided her night would end with a text message that seemed halfway normal when it came 59


to Jackie. Dropping Waffle onto the balcony, she stretched and returned inside just in time to see a breaking news story on her television screen. Her breath caught in her throat at the sight of flames consuming an office building, which she recognized from the south side of town. It was one of those old high rise buildings the government supplied to low-income families, the type that always reminded her of Ben Pinato, one of her childhood friends whom Jackie had been keeping tabs on whenever he came home from Australia. He’d lived three streets away from her, directly on the dividing line between the school with the metal detectors at every entrance and the smaller, middle income, blue collar school the rest of them had attended. Thanks to being toward the end of the alphabet and good grades, Ben had ended up with the rest of them. Because of him and his constantly drugged out mother, Gert had seen public housing, the cracks in the walls, the lighting that could become an electrical hazard at any moment, the stains on the bathroom ceiling from the previous tenant attempting to barbeque inside. She wondered if a bathtub barbeque had been the cause of the blaze she stared at on her television screen, if one bad decision had engulfed an entire building in fire within minutes. Without closing the sliding glass door, she walked in a daze toward the television and sat on the edge of her plumcolored ottoman, the one she’d discovered at a flea market and 60


forced her brother Tony to carry through the crowd and to her Ford Escort, where it didn’t fit in the back seat or the trunk. She found herself absently touching a bald patch on the fabric, much as she’d done as she watched news reports of her brother’s death. The ticker tape across the bottom of the screen brought tears to her eyes, but she didn’t look away. Six firefighters injured, one dead in partial highrise building collapse overnight. Every time she heard of a firefighter lost in the line of duty her throat tightened. She clasped her hands, staring at the letters that blurred before her. Kevin could have been one of the injured or the one dead. No one would have called her to tell her he’d been carried out of the building…or if he was still inside, perhaps not accounted for yet. Waffle rubbed up against her leg and tapped her knee with his paw, requesting a place on her lap. Rather than pick him up, she stood and grabbed her car keys. The injury to her ankle still hurt like all hell, but physical pain made no difference when her concern for Kevin ripped her insides apart. If he was dead, she needed to know. If he was one of the six injured, she needed to go to the hospital and show her love and support. If he was perfectly fine, she wanted to wrap her arms around him and call him every name in the book for worrying her. She wanted to kiss him, hold him, tell him how much she 61


wanted him to stay in her life now that they’d found each other again. She had to find him.

62


CHAPTER 8 Gert pressed send on her cell phone and waited for Jackie to answer. She wondered what time it was in Belgium, which was the last place Jackie had mentioned on her trip around the world. No matter the hour, only Jackie would know who to call first and how to find Kevin. She could find anyone, including Carleena, who had disappeared into the behind-thescenes world of Hollywood, and Garrett, who had turned into a fish and probably lived in Atlantis by now. The glue that held their group together, she annoyed the hell out of Gert whenever they got together in person, but over the phone and in emails she was a lifesaver. “You always call just when I’m about to get laid,” Jackie 63


huffed as she answered the phone. Gert sputtered, not knowing how in the hell she was supposed to respond. “This is important.” “Yeah, well…it better be life and death important.” “It is. It’s Kevin.” Long silence followed, swallowed up only by a very male voice somewhere in the background. “What’s up, Gertie?” “He got a call about a fire,” she said, her voice tightening with each word as she relayed the story to Jackie, who asked important questions at all the right times. She managed to keep the conversation sensible, never once allowing Gert a moment to break down and sob like she wanted to from the moment she saw the blurb on her television. “Do you have his cell phone number? ” “He doesn’t have it on. I’ve tried it at least a hundred times and it goes straight to his voicemail. I don’t know how to contact him or where he lives. Jackie, I can’t find him anywhere and I don’t know what to do.” “You hold on one minute and I’m going to call Kevin’s cell from Garrett’s phone.” Her voice turned muffled as she snapped orders at Garrett, who didn’t respond verbally. Gertie coasted through a green light and pulled into the first hospital she found. The Emergency Room entrance was crowded with police cars and ambulances all parked with the engines still running. With her phone muted, she rolled her window down and waved to the nearest officer, who was talking to a group of women, who were either undercover cops or prostitutes. 64


“I’m sorry. I’m looking for a firefighter named Kevin Thomas,” she said. The officer looked from her to the women and back again. “You have to go inside and ask one of the receptionists.” He pointed to the ER doors, then to a white sign with red lettering and a picture of a car being towed. “And you can’t park here. It’s a fire lane.” “I have an injury.” “Yeah?” “And this is an emergency.” “Hence the Emergency Room. Move your vehicle to a parking space.” He turned away before she could continue. “Gertie!” Jackie shouted. She pressed a button on her cell phone to rejoin the call and held it up to her ear. “Did you find out anything?” “His cell phone isn’t on.” “That could mean a lot of things.” Like dead, missing, injured, in a coma for the next twenty years… “I know,” she squeaked, fear consuming her. “If he’s in the hospital, he’s required to have it powered off. Trust me, they’re vigilant about that rule.” “Then how do I find him? He could be anywhere.” “Do you know which fire house he calls home?” “No.” She pulled out of the Emergency Room drive and onto the street again, stepping hard on the gas pedal to avoid a street sweeper. With each question it seemed like she knew less and less about him, which didn’t jive well with her. She wanted it to be 65


just like old times where she knew his favorite color, which had always been blue, his favorite cookies, Double Stuff Oreos, his favorite baseball team, some smaller operation in the suburbs called the Thunderbolts, and his movie, which just like most guys his age happened to be the first Star Wars film. Aside from the movie, she had no idea how much he’d evolved beyond horny, rebellious teenager. Of course he’d changed. He’d definitely grown up, but they didn’t have hours to sit in study hall and fawn over one another, pass notes in the hallway or slip them into each other’s lockers. They were grownups—and he had a very adult life, one that meant he might not come home again. “Gertie, did you hear my question?” “No, I’m sorry. I’m just a little frustrated.” “Honey, he’s going to be just fine.” “I said that a hundred times about Tony,” she mumbled. “And one night I was wrong.” Jackie didn’t reply immediately, and Gert wouldn’t have listened even if she had. Her brother had shown her the cliché was painfully true—life came with no guarantees. No matter how careful or how repetitive his job, one night could take it all away. “We’ll find someone who knows Kevin and go from there,” Jackie said, always the assertive mind. “It might take a little bit of investigation on our part, but I’m sure an EMT or someone at one of the police stations knows him.” “But how am I supposed to—” She slammed on the brakes and switched the phone from one ear to the other. “I’ve got it. 66


I know the name of his dispatcher. It’s Jerry. He was talking to him on the phone during the fire drill.” “See, now there’s a start. We can call information and find him that way.” “This could take hours.” “Relax, I already have Garrett looking up the numbers for the fire houses. Why don’t you go home, and I’ll make some phone calls? God, I hope you’re not doped up on painkillers and driving around the city.” “I’m not.” Her gaze fixed on the opaque sliding glass doors and the pair of EMTs heading toward their waiting ambulance. They moved aside for a very pregnant woman being helped into a wheelchair and a woman several feet behind carrying a bundled up baby. Seeing them reminded her that she wasn’t the only person in the city who needed help. “You don’t sound right.” “I’m worried.” “You should be in bed, Gertrude. It’s the middle of the night.” Oh, now Jackie meant business calling Gert by her full name. “I’m not heading home. I have to find him.” “And you will, but you need to go home and get some rest,” Jackie said firmly. “You can’t be running around the city with a broken ankle.” “It’s just a sprain.” “Don’t argue with me.” Jackie exhaled. “Jackie, you don’t know what this is like for me.” Another brief pause on the other end and Gert felt herself 67


start to choke up. She didn’t want to break down like this. She was always the one who maintained composure, the shoulder for her mother to cry on at the funeral, the one to look straight ahead and say nothing, pretend to feel nothing as his brothers drove fire trucks behind the hearse. “Where exactly are you?” “The hospital.” “Which one?” “St. Joseph, on Cicero.” Jackie muffled the phone and mumbled something to Garrett, who replied with a lot more enthusiasm than Gert had expected. “What’s wrong?” “Nothing. Hey, are you still in your car?” “Yeah, but I’m not leaving here, not until I find him.” “Look, I know you’re in pain and you’re worried, but you can’t be tying up my phone line. Stay right where you are and try to relax. I’m going to send someone to stay with you.” “I don’t need a sitter.” “And I don’t think you should be alone right now. Trust me, Gertie. I’m trying to help you.” More people came out of the ER, among them a guy and a shorter woman with her arm in a sling and dark hair in a mussed ponytail. She didn’t need to see the man’s face to know it was Kevin. She’d know those broad shoulders and his easy gait anywhere. “Found him,” she said, relief slowly replacing the dread that had followed her since she saw the television report. 68


“What?” Jackie asked. “I just saw him.” “You did?” She relayed the message to Garrett. “Are you sure?” “Yeah. I gotta go.”

69


CHAPTER 9 The cop that had told her to move her vehicle began shouting as she left the car idling and hobbled out, her bum ankle throbbing in pain. She yelled to Kevin, who didn’t hear her over the wail of an emerging ambulance and the hospital’s ventilation system. A woman heading in the other direction noticed her and glanced back at Kevin, catching him by the sleeve. With her thumb she gestured toward Gert, who had lost ground hobbling over the curb. He turned just as she caught her crutch on a drainage grate and lurched forward, stepping awkwardly on her good foot. She hopped several times, her arms wheeling as she attempted 70


to maintain her balance. Somehow she managed to grab hold of the railing and save herself just as Kevin rushed to her side. “Garrett just called me.” The voice was deep, masculine, but not Kevin’s more husky tone. She sucked in a wild breath and looked up into dark, friendly, familiar eyes. Relief allowed her to breathe again, though she still didn’t feel complete. “Ben?” “Gert.” He smiled and rubbed her shoulders, concern heavy in his cocoa brown eyes. Even back in grade school she’d always thought he had dreamy eyes, the kind a girl could swim in for hours on end. Somewhere along the way the rest of his body had finally caught up with his eyes and turned him from scrawny teenager to solid, muscular man. “I just heard the news.” “What news? What did you hear?” “That you were looking for Kevin. Garrett just sent me a message and said you’d pulled into the ER.” Looking didn’t seem like a strong enough word. She felt as though she were desperately searching for him like a diver frantic for one last pocket of air in a dark, treacherous cave. Suffocation seemed like a real possibility, like a fate she couldn’t ignore if she didn’t find him. “Hey, it’s okay. Relax,” Ben said softly. “Calm down, Gertie, you’re shaking all over.” With the last of her drained energy she shrugged his hand away. “I can’t relax. I need to find him.” 71


“Whoa, hold on there. How about you sit with Carleena, and I’ll do the looking?” Before she could ask, Carleena leaned forward and into her line of sight, her eyes heavy given the time of night. She still looked gorgeous, which was something only Carleena could pull off. “What happened to you?” Gert asked, eyeing the sling. “A dog that outweighs me by thirty pounds and a boyfriend who thinks he’s the dog whisperer.” Sirens wailed their approach and Gert stiffened, her skin prickling the way it did whenever she heard a fire engine. Independence Day parades were a nightmare with the dozens of fire trucks from every town passing by at ten miles an hour, the horns and sirens filling the air and seeping into her bones, holding her captive in a nightmare she realized she’d never forgotten. Somehow she’d managed to fool herself with a thin veil of acceptance, always putting on a brave face, even though she still thought of Tony daily. She wondered if he’d thought of her that day, if he’d told one of the other men who’d walked into the building and come out alive, “Tell my family I love them.” That wasn’t like him. He wasn’t sentimental. He probably hadn’t thought about her in weeks, maybe not since Christmas, when they’d secretly fought in the kitchen about God knows what. All she knew was that every time he asked for someone to pass him something she’d wanted to throw it at his damn head. 72


And then she’d lost the one person who could make her laugh and make her want to smack him. A true brother in every sense, annoying but lovable. Sometimes a little more of one than the other. The truck passed the ER entrance, the lights flashing and the red engine a blur in the dark of night. A nightmare on wheels, regrets with a voice that ripped through her. The ghost of her brother coming back to give her a message she didn’t want to understand. “Is that him?” she asked. “I don’t think so,” Carleena answered. It wasn’t Kevin. Or it could have been him and she’d never know. She hugged herself and allowed Ben to support her against his body as he guided her toward a bench and told her to sit. Carleena scooted closer and handed her a tissue, which she stared at for a moment through glassy eyes, realizing for the first time that she’d begun to cry. “How about Ben drives us back to your place?” Carleena suggested. “We’ll stay the night if you don’t want to be alone.” Memories flooded her mind of sitting on the back porch with Carleena while a somber funeral party ate in the house and talked about what a good guy her brother Tony had been. “I’ll take you two back and keep looking for him. For all we know, he’s home asleep with his phone off.” “He could be,” Carleena mumbled, but she lacked conviction in her voice. “I can’t do this again.” Gert sobbed against Carleena’s 73


shoulder, grateful to be found, but at the same time feeling more lost than she’d ever felt before. A gentle hand settled on her shoulder and gave it a squeeze, which was Ben’s way of telling her he was nearby without getting in the way. “Oh, God,” she said, her voice weak, disrupted by hiccups. “I’m in love with him. How could I be in love with him?” “Honey, it’s been a long night. Let’s get you home where you belong,” Carleena suggested, squeezing her tight. Ben picked her up, telling her to hold onto him, that he had her. But it didn’t feel like anyone held onto her. It felt like a freefall, one moment away from impact, her heart a bloody, unrecognizable lump. She wouldn’t need it anymore, not if she’d lost Kevin. She lifted her head from Ben’s shoulder and tried to steady her trembling lower lip, but she’d long since lost all control of herself. “I won’t do this again,” she told him. “Never again.”

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CHAPTER 10 Kevin threw off his shirt and tossed it into a laundry bag, adrenaline still pumping through his veins. Nothing like a little danger to get the heart going, and he definitely craved the high that accompanied entering a building consumed by flames. He lived for the rush of making a difference, of getting to the point where there was no way in hell he could turn back. The moment people depended on him belonged to him, to either step up or step out—and he wasn’t one to step out. His muscles would ache later on, once he took a hot shower and joked with the guys, but for now he felt as though he could sprint around the block several times before hitting the inevitable wall. Then he’d crash, most likely on the couch, 75


and wake several hours later in a bed of crushed Cheetos and beef jerky. It wouldn’t be the first time. “What the hell happened to you, kid?” Maloney asked as he patted down his salt and pepper hair. His beer gut hung over his pants, while his gold rosary swung as he walked toward the showers. “When?” Kevin asked, stripping down in order to hit the showers. “Tonight. You were late.” “Late? How do you figure?” The beefy older man rolled his eyes. “I ain’t ever beat you in here on a call and tonight we could’ve left without you. What did you do? Go to the wrong firehouse?” “Yeah, I forgot my way, Maloney.” “Me and O’Sullivan thought you might have gone to the more newsworthy fire.” He’d briefly heard the guys talking about a second fire in a high rise, the result of someone starting a fire in their bathtub to keep warm. In the colder months they saw everything in lower income neighborhoods from folks burning newspapers to leaving ovens open in order to heat apartments. This blaze, however, had been deadly, a far cry from the fire he’d helped put out. “You know me, sir. Always one for the fame. The ladies dig it.” Maloney scowled. As a third-generation firefighter, he thought he owned the place. “Don’t get smart with me, kid.” “Maybe I’m losing my touch.” 76


“Bullshit.” For a half a second Maloney smiled, the fierce Irishman turned momentarily friendly. “Maybe you’re not taking the job seriously.” His left shoulder itched, and as he passed a mirror on the way to the showers, he turned and glanced at the black tattoo. Immediately he thought of Gertie and how Tony had always said she deserved someone better in her life than Kevin, especially when he talked crazy about soul mates, getting married, and being together forever. “If you ever—and I mean ever— want anything to do with Gertrude, you’re going to have to get off your ass and quit screwing around. Look at yourself. What the hell are you going to do with your life?” This is what he’d done with his life, follow right behind Tony into the boots of a firefighter. He’d worked damn hard to go from volunteer to employee with more than a handful of strings pulled, most of them thanks to his relationship with Tony, however brief it had been. Sometimes he didn’t know who he wanted to impress more—Tony so he’d let him see Gert again, or Gert so she’d notice him. They’d gone their separate ways, but he’d always thought about her. Some girls just had that affect on a guy, woven right into the fabric of his heart. It seemed ridiculous that high school sweethearts could be anything in the future, especially since they’d broken up long ago. But the moment he heard about Ben and Carleena hooking up he’d thought about Gert, wondered where she’d gone and how he could see her again. 77


And now he couldn’t wait to get back with her. Rather than a night on the couch, he could snuggle up in her arms as his speeding heart rate finally eased and he could sleep. That’s what he had to look forward to at the end of the day, getting to know her all over again. “Oh, boy,” Maloney grumbled. “You’re getting laid, aren’t you? Ah, well, it’s about time someone took pity on you, kid.” Kevin scratched his shoulder and wondered if this was Tony’s way of saying he was finally good enough to see his litter sister. With a smile he clapped Maloney on the back and entered the showers. “I think I might be doing something right for once.” *

*

*

Kevin wrapped a towel around his hips and dug into his bag in search of his keys and cell phone. Every muscle in his body ached something fierce, as though he’d been tugged and twisted in every direction and then stuffed into a blender. He’d finally hit the wall with brutal force and come down from his adrenaline high, as had the rest of the guys pulling on their street clothes. They looked like a hoard of naked zombies trudging from the steam-filled showers—the new, younger guys still holding onto their energy, while the more seasoned professionals trudged out and complained about the lack of hot water and the news crews always in their way. Kevin walked to his locker and rubbed his fingers through his damp hair with one hand while he turned on his phone with the other. His phone instantly buzzed with a new 78


voicemail message. Brow furrowed, he listened to several messages from Gert and a dozen more hang-ups he assumed were from her. Each one she sounded increasingly frantic, her voice hinting at her fragile state. “Gert,” he mumbled, climbing to his feet. He slung his duffle bag over his shoulder, the steel tip of his boot digging into his spine as he jogged down the stairs. “Why the hell you gotta worry so much, sweetheart?” He glanced at the clock before leaving the firehouse and considered calling her back later on. Had it not been for the alert, he would have been sound asleep with no sign of waking until after ten. But he wasn’t in Gert’s place, and he knew from the sound of her voice she had probably spent the night awake and waiting for him to call her and say he was okay. Sunlight had just startled to trickle over the city buildings while street sweepers roared down the one-way roads and taxis fought to pass them before they reached the corner. He waited for a bus and several cars to pass before he jogged across the street and to the parking garage where he’d left his bike. “Huh.” He grunted. Maybe she had gone to bed after all. A yawn escaped and he closed his phone, only to hear it chime with a text message. He flipped it open and found thirteen new messages, a record for his popularity. With the motorcycle running, he scrolled through the list of names and furrowed his brow. It appeared Gert had an army on the lookout for him, starting with Jackie and Garrett and ending with a question mark from Ben Pinato. He leaned back 79


against the headrest and sighed. She’d called out the big dogs, which probably meant she’d seen the fire on TV and believed everything they said. Once again he tried her cell, but she’d apparently turned it off for the night or was in a hospital looking for him. He could just see her limping from Mercy to St. Francis, demanding that someone find him. Over and over he tried her number as he drove toward her apartment. Traffic filled the streets while pedestrians yapped on their Bluetooths and clung to their morning cups of coffee. The world looked as robotic and predictable as ever, no one concerned about fires or collapsing roofs, no one searching or being searched for. His cell phone rang just as he pulled up in front of Gert’s building and turned off the engine. With his helmet under his arm, he answered the call. “Thank God,” the woman on the other end huffed. “Who is this?” “Where in the hell have you been all night? Do you realize what I’ve been through?” Only one person in the world would make this about herself. “Are you with Gert?” “No,” Jackie answered. “I’m on the other side of the world trying to enjoy a cup of steamed milk and chocolate while trying to console Gertrude.” She sighed in complete disgust. “And hunting your ass all night.” “Her phone isn’t on.” “Then Carleena probably hit the wrong button. You know 80


what a complete idiot she can be when it comes to electronics.” “Why would Carleena have Gert’s phone?” Another sigh of disgust. “Are you paying attention? Because they just picked her up from the hospital ER where she’s been looking for you.” He closed his eyes, his worst case scenario confirmed. “She shouldn’t be out. She sprained her ankle.” “Yeah, well, try telling her that and see how far you get.” She mumbled something and a guy, presumably Garrett, answered. “Look, Kevin, where have you been all night?” “Putting out a fire. I just left the station and I’m sitting in front of her place now.” He leaned forward, hoping to catch a glimpse of her window and see if the television was on or if she was hobbling around on her crutches. “You better get your ass in there, pronto.” “Yeah, I assumed so.” “Do you have any idea what you’re putting her through?” “Putting her through? It sounds like you’re the one who’s pissed at me. What the hell are you chewing my ass out for?” “Because this is what I’ve dealt with all night long.” Now it was his turn to sigh. “I do this every single day.” “I know you do, but Gertie doesn’t.” He started to reply, but only shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’ve gotta see her. Now.” “Hey,” Jackie said, the edge gone from her voice, “I’m going to give you a warning, Kev.” He grunted, already knowing what she’d say. “She might not be ready for this.” 81


CHAPTER 11 A bang on the door sent Gert flying off the couch and scared Waffle off Ben’s lap and right up the curtains. Motioning to Gert to stay put, Carleena zipped up her sweat jacket and marched toward the door, pausing before she opened it as though she also feared the worst. Gert watched through half-closed eyes. She hadn’t cried so much in years, since she realized long after the funeral and all of the condolences that her brother wasn’t coming back, no matter how hard she hoped to wake one day and find him in his room playing video games or in the garage lifting weights. Hopes meant nothing. Life happened in the most brutal ways possible and left people reeling, no matter if they prayed, 82


hated God’s guts, or didn’t believe in an afterlife. Carleena sucked in a breath and flung the door wide open, and before Gertie had a chance to register what had happened, Kevin strode in, his gaze sweeping the room. He found her stretched out on the couch and his lips parted as though he had reason to be relieved. “You’re awake,” he said. It took her a moment to catch her breath, to drink him in from head to toe, that body of his she wanted to touch again. Someone needed to pinch her, slap her, do something to reassure her that she hadn’t fallen asleep. He could have been a cruel dream, a vision conjured in hope. She started to reach out to him, but exhaustion had hit her full force and she swiped at the empty air, then cursed under her breath as her eyes filled with tears. “Easy, sweetheart,” Carleena said in her ear. She pushed her away. Nothing was easy, most of all the life of a firefighter, policeman, marine…anyone who purposely put themselves in danger. How in the hell did they expect their families to sleep at night? How could they ever think their wives and children could live one moment without wondering if tonight would be the last night they’d see him come home? “Of course I’m awake,” she snapped, her words emerging more acidic than she’d intended. “I’ve been waiting to hear from you.” Kevin’s shoulders slumped. “You should’ve gone to bed. I’d have called in the morning.” 83


“Really?” “Of course I would have.” “Because you’re automatically guaranteed a morning?” His eyes narrowed. “What?” “I can’t wait for you like this.” “Like what?” “Six wounded and one dead.” His head jerked back as though the realization hit him and he frowned. “That wasn’t us.” “Not this time.” He paused, the relief he’d first shown when he walked through the door slowly fading into bewilderment. “I don’t know what you want me to say.” “I want you to promise me it’ll never be you.” He looked away and shook his head, his mouth curling into a humorless smile. “Exactly.” His gaze snapped back to her face, his pale eyes fiery, blazing with a fight he’d sure as hell finish. “Exactly what?” “You can’t make a promise like that, can you?” Kevin shifted his weight. “No, I can’t.” “Gertie,” Carleena warned, “maybe you two should talk later, when you’ve both had some sleep.” “I want to know what the hell he expects from me with his big plans,” she said, glaring at him. “Because all I’ve ever heard from him is his big, fucking plans that never go anywhere. So tell me what it’s going to be this time, Kevin? What’s your big idea for us now, huh?” 84


“All I expected was a chance,” he said, his hands extended, his palms up. For a split second, everything she’d always wanted to say to her brother sat at the back of her throat. She wanted to scream at him, tell him he couldn’t do this anymore because it wasn’t fair to her or to anyone else. “You’re expecting way too much from me. Our chance is over. It’s been over since high school. Why can’t you see that? We don’t belong together, Kevin, and that’s why it never worked out. It’s still not going to work out. You’re not what I need in my life.” Carleena inhaled sharply, looking from Ben to Kevin to Gertie with a look of complete horror. Kevin backed away toward the door, staring at her each step of the way. “After all this time you really haven’t changed that much, Gert,” he said under his breath. “You can still leave me with a hell of a lot to remember you by in the last moments we speak.” “Kevin,” Carleena offered, but she didn’t finish her thought. It didn’t matter what anyone said. Gert felt Kevin staring through her, his angry, rebellious side flaring up, threatening to singe the edges of the gentle, loving man behind the bad boy image. “I should have listened the last time we broke up, when you told me I wasn’t worth the time investment.” For a moment she wondered if he’d punch a hole in the wall or kick in her door after he slammed it shut, but whatever 85


brewed behind his eyes simmered and died. “I hope your ankle feels better,” he said. Then he walked out and shut the door. *

*

*

Carleena tucked Gert into bed and kissed her on the forehead. “He’ll call,” she said firmly. “Whether you want him to or not, he’s not done here.” She sighed. “Just thank God you’re on medication and very little sleep. You have a pretty damn good excuse for biting his head off after he came over here to see you.” Her words of equal parts consolation and guilt barely registered. Gert had exhausted herself emotionally and physically, her body feeling like a husk barely covering her raw insides. Despite the needed company, her stomach knotted, her throat tight and painful from keeping tears at bay. “I can’t believe you two ran into each other.” Carleena sat on the edge of the bed and laced her fingers with Gert’s. She sounded as though she only wanted to make conversation, but for the moment it didn’t bother Gert. She didn’t want to be alone, able to think about what she’d said to Kevin. “I still remember the first time you and Kevin kissed. God, you talked about that kiss for at least a week in the lunchroom. Every time I looked at him I was so embarrassed, especially when he winked at me in the hallway.” She’d told everyone about it—and those were the days before email and text messages where it took a lot of effort to get the word around. He’d sat on the floor beside her bed 86


when her parents came in to make sure she was doing her homework. Her mom hadn’t cared much for him, but she’d let him stay because he obviously needed a good Christian girl to teach him a thing or two, especially when it came to studying. The moment her parents told them to wrap it up and walked out, he’d dragged her off the bed and kissed her on the bedroom floor, her first real kiss. He’d felt better than she’d ever imagined, tasted like strawberries from the shortcakes her mom had made. So that’s why he’d wanted strawberries earlier…damn him. “Remember how you wanted to name your six kids? What were they again?” “That was years ago.” Carleena slipped into bed beside her and smiled. “Was it Jeremiah for the oldest?” “Jonas.” With a chuckle, Carleena poked her in the shoulder. “I knew you’d remember.” “I was a complete bitch to him right now, wasn’t I?” “Honestly?” Carleena asked. Gert bit her lip and nodded. “Honestly, yeah. I think even Ben felt like you kicked him in the balls with the way you went after Kevin. What in the hell was that all about anyway? He came over here to see you, just like you wanted all night long.” “I don’t want him to do everything I want.” “Here we go,” Carleena said under her breath. “Gert—” 87


Gertie flopped on her side and hugged herself. “Why does he have to be a firefighter? Of all the jobs in the world, why this?” “Because that’s who he is.” “Why?” “Ask him.” “I don’t want to ask him. I don’t want anything to do with him.” “Gertie, he’s not Tony.” “But he could be,” she blurted out. Carleena closed her eyes and sighed. “I know it was hard on you and Prudence when he died, but you can’t hold Kevin’s job against him. That’s not fair to him or to you.” She hugged Gert tight and wiggled her toes. “Did you see the way he looked at you the moment I opened the door? He didn’t see me or Ben, just you. Do you really want to lose something like that?” “No,” she answered, wishing she could turn away. “That’s why I can’t see him any more. I don’t want to lose him.” Carleena sat up and ran her fingers through her hair. “Gertie,” she snapped. Several seconds passed and neither of them spoke. “Suit yourself. I need to get home. Ben’s leaving Monday morning.” “Leaving?” “Back to work in Australia. This was our last night alone together for the next three months.” “I’m sorry—” “I’m not.” Carleena glanced over her shoulder at Gert and 88


gave a wry smile. “I have what I want, even if it’s not always going to be easy. At least I know I have it.” “So you’re trying to make me feel guilty?” “Why did Tony become a firefighter?” “Because it’s what he wanted to do since he was five.” Carleena nodded. “Are you still mad at him?” Gertie’s throat tightened and she nodded. Without realizing it, she’d always been angry at him for leaving her behind. They’d been close in age, so close everyone thought they were twins. She felt as though she’d lost part of herself when he’d been killed in the fire. “If you can forgive Tony for doing what he wanted to do, even if it meant him losing his life, call Kevin and just ask him why he’s a fireman. Just give him a chance, Gertie.”

89


CHAPTER 12 Kevin had no idea how he could hate a woman so much and still want to see her. He worked out all morning at the gym down the street from his place, imagining how fantastic make up sex would be if he could see her one last time. With each push-up he wanted her begging for more beneath him, with each chest press he wanted her mounted on his hips, her breasts in the palms of his hands. But she didn’t want him and had made it painfully clear, not only to his face but in front of two of their mutual friends. “Fuck it,” he said under his breath, throwing his towel to the mat before he dropped down to finish stretching. It had been a week since he’d seen her and either he was well on his 90


way to being in the best shape of his life or the extra time at the gym was going to kill him. He didn’t really care either way. If only he could get her off his damn mind. She was supposed to be the good girl, the sweet, caring daughter in a family of three kids and two loving parents. That’s why he’d been attracted to her in the first place—the way she just seemed to flow with everything around her, as though she belonged exactly where she’d been born. But he’d never belonged with her. He’d been the kid who had everything he wanted because his mom felt bad about the long hours she worked at night and his dad had sales quotas to meet each month and couldn’t come to football games or guitar lessons. Two years ago on Christmas, when he’d decided to go away with some friends, his mom had told him over the phone she was glad she never had more kids because it had been hard enough on one. She’d sounded so relieved, as though she could finally lift the weight of latch-key parenting off her shoulders. It wasn’t like he was unhappy growing up. What teenager didn’t want the whole house every night to screw around rather than finish homework? He’d done whatever the hell he wanted to do until he met Gertie, and not because she was about to change him. She liked the way he spun out of control, the way he didn’t quite fit into her perfect puzzle of life. But Tony had hated him, and that had made all the difference. From the corner of his eye he caught sight of something lurching through the gym doors and turned. He stared for one long second at a woman in light pink sweats before he realized 91


he was staring at Gert attempting to negotiate the ramp on crutches. His favorite dream and his worst damn nightmare all rolled into one hobbled toward him, her eyes cast down, her hair pulled back in a ponytail. “Hey,” she said as she approached. Her voice sounded weak, as if she really put no effort into addressing him. He looked up at her. “Ankle feeling better?” “Ankle feels like hell.” He wondered if her version of hell felt anything like what he went through wanting her back. “Sorry to hear that. Put some ice on it when you get home.” “Thanks for the advice.” “Just trying to help,” he said under his breath. She shifted her weight and lost her balance, her crutch flying out from under her arm and hitting one of the weight machines. In slow motion, she tipped to the side and fell, catching herself on her forearms with a thud that made him wince. “Holy—” “Hobbits,” she finished for him, rolling onto her back. He fought to keep from chuckling and fought even harder to keep from wrapping his arms around her. God damn, flat on her back and sprawled on a gym floor and she still looked hot. Gert moved her wrapped up ankle and sighed. “I swear to God, when you’re around me, I’m always on my ass,” she mumbled. He stared at her a moment, wanting to take the bait and 92


flirt like hell with her. But he couldn’t do it this time, not when she’d push him away again. “I guess you’ve got a lot to blame me for,” he said, helping her to her feet, feeling the contours of her body molding with his as he propped her up. A younger guy with a crew cut and dark framed glasses retrieved her crutch, handing it to her slowly so he could check her out. Either Gert didn’t notice or didn’t care because she barely offered a thank you before the kid walked away. “I was sort of hoping we could talk about that,” she said under her breath, making her way toward the back of the gym where the women’s locker rooms were located. “You’ve got a list for me or something? All the reasons I’m just not good enough for you?” Her chin lowered and she stared at the ground like a scolded child, which only made him want to bend her over his knee and smack her round, perfect ass. “I knew this wouldn’t be easy.” “My fault again.” Gertie took a trembling breath. “Why don’t I get you a stick and you can pummel me all you like?” “You poor thing,” he said, realizing he’d walked her directly into the women’s locker room. It looked and smelled as though no one ever used it. The walls were decorated with some sort of nautical theme and the lights were dim and calming. A fountain in the corner trickled, giving the room peaceful ambiance, which was a far cry from the men’s room where artificial lighting revealed every wrinkle on the older 93


men, who could carry on a full conversation with their towel over their shoulder and their clothes in their locker. Gertie took a deep breath. “Kevin, I’ve spent a week trying to think of something to say and by the time I finally worked up the courage and came down here looking for you, I decided not to script my words and give you some big speech. I just wanted to talk to you.” “I think you’ve already said all I want to hear, Gertie. I don’t know how you can possibly make your point any clearer.” “Can I ask you one question?” Kevin took a deep breath and slung his towel across his shoulders. No matter what she said or did, he’d always let her have her way. Talk about whipped. “Go ahead.” She sat on the bench in the middle of the room and motioned for him to do the same before she propped her crutches up against the lockers. After a long moment of debating whether he should stay or leave, he broke down and straddled the bench. “Why did you decide to become a firefighter?” “Because I sucked at everything else.” Gert frowned. “I’m being serious, Kevin.” “So am I. Right out of high school I realized I did a shit job detailing bikes, so I quit.” Long before Orange County Choppers hit television screens nationwide he’d gotten a job as an apprentice in a bike shop, but he didn’t have the attention span to work on one bike. He wanted to be all over 94


the place, doing something that gave him a rush. “And hockey was cool, but I wasn’t the best player on the team.” He shrugged, remembering her words: Not worth the time investment. “You and I weren’t together anymore at that point, but I still hung around Tony, and he talked me into coming down to the station and getting disciplined. He said I showed potential and good teamwork, but I couldn’t get in full-time without a hell of a lot of work.” “He got you in?” “Of course he got me in. It’s impossible otherwise, especially around here where some of these guys are bred into it. You know how it is with your grandfather having been a fireman.” She nodded. “I have his picture on my desk.” Kevin looked away and nodded. A woman dressed for yoga walked into the locker room, took one look at him, and walked back out. “Tony pretty much gave me all the jobs no one else wanted.” Kevin smiled to himself. He’d wanted to kick Tony’s ass by the time he finished his first full day. “He had me coming around just before the station had its annual public open house, so when the rest of the guys asked if they’d see me volunteering, I said I’d be there all day. Your brother gave me a pat on the back and told me he had the whole thing planned out.” “Oh, I wouldn’t have trusted him.” She smiled at him, a warm and gentle expression he craved from her. “Yeah, now you tell me. He stuck me in the virtual burning 95


house for the whole day and had me take little kids up and down through fake smoke and blaring alarms on my hands and knees. One kid puked on me and another little girl screamed in my ear the entire time, all seventeen times she went through.” Gert smiled. “That sounds like one of his plans.” “I know he wanted to see if I’d quit and walk away, but I didn’t. That bastard wasn’t going to get rid of me that easily.” “Why’d you do it?” “Because I was good at it, Gertie. I saw the way those kids listened when I told them to get on the ground and crawl to the window. And you know what? About two months later that little girl who went through that house seventeen times, her house caught on fire and she got her parents, her brothers, and her dog out alive. She said she knew what to do because she’d done it before at the fire station.” Gert’s eyes filled with tears and she nodded, wiping moisture away with her sleeve. “You saved her.” “I wasn’t there to save her. I was there to teach her how to save herself and she got it, even when I thought there was no way in hell she understood anything I told her. What more could I want than knowing the job I worked like hell to get through ended up paying off?” “Don’t you worry about yourself?” He forced a smile. “I’ve got enough people to do it for me.” “From the moment you left my apartment, I worried about you.” Kevin closed his eyes and ran his fingers through his hair. 96


“Yeah, I should’ve known that, shouldn’t I?” “I don’t know if I’m able to go through this. Your job—” “It’s dangerous, I know.” He glanced at her crutches. “And apparently so is yours.” “I have coordination problems when it comes to heels.” Without thinking, he reached out and squeezed her knee. “Then it’s a good thing I came to the rescue and you saved you from your shoes.” “I’m not trying to be funny, Kevin. It terrifies me to think of losing you.” She paused, her eyes glassy. “I’m not the dangerous type. I like to know what’s going to happen, I like guarantees, and I like my life at least in a rough sketch.” “I know, but that’s asking way too much of yourself and everyone around you.” He knew that’s why she’d never been able to stay with him. In her cautious little world she could only tolerate bite-size pieces. “But I like what I do, Gert. It’s not twenty-four hours a day danger and adrenaline, but when I’m there when someone needs me, it’s worth it.” She struggled to her feet and met his eye. Hands on his shoulders, she balanced herself, pressing against him, sinking into him. The smell of her lingered on his skin, made him want to grip her tighter than necessary and never let go. She rubbed her thumbs along his aching muscles, kneading and massaging him with her gentle, irresistible touch. “I don’t know what else you want to know.” He stood, his hands like a vice around her hips, daring her to look away from him. “I want to know why you put up with me.” 97


At last he cracked a smile. “Hell if I know.” The humor on her face and in her voice faded. “I don’t want anything to happen to you, ever.” He leaned forward, resting her forehead against his. “That’s all I can ask you to want from me. You already know I can’t make concrete promises, at least not like that.” Slowly he drew her closer, knowing he would fall for her again and again no matter what. He liked her fragility, her compassion for him and her honesty. That’s all he wanted from her, to know what she felt inside rather than her turning him away. Trembling hands caressed his face and lips. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I just don’t want to think—” He silenced her with a rough, hard kiss to the mouth and pushed her against the lockers where she wrapped her arms around him, her fingernails digging into his sweat-dampened T-shirt. “I don’t want you to think either, Gert. Just be with me. Right now.” Her body shook, but she nodded and clung to him, allowed him to carry her into the showers. He didn’t bother shutting the dividing curtain, not with a mirror across the tiled floor. Slowly he lowered her onto her good leg and unzipped her sweatshirt. “You weren’t kidding about right now, were you?” she teased as she pulled his shirt over his head and ran her hands down his chest. “Not at all.” His cock stood tall and hard, greeting her the moment she 98


reached for his shorts. She didn’t seem all that surprised and smiled, reaching around him to turn on the water just as she stepped out of her pink sweatpants. Welcome, hot water hit him in the lower back and he pulled her close, dragging her beneath the downpour in her bra and panties. Steam rose around them and he kissed her, running his fingers through her damp hair while he enjoyed the site of her dark pink nipples through thin fabric. Her gaze followed his as he circled around her hardened flesh and teased a groan from her lips. Slowly he kneaded her breast, feeling her with the heel of his hand, allowing his fingers to roll and stroke her. He pinched her nipple between his thumb and forefinger and gently lifted, watching as she inhaled sharply and arched her back. Her hand ran down his back and along his ass where she grabbed him more roughly than he expected. Her fingers pressed between his cheeks, hot and slick from the cascade of water around them. A breath hissed past his teeth, telling her in a primal, commanding voice how much he enjoyed the way she played with him. His balls ached with needed release, and he had a feeling she’d bring him there without ever touching his dick. All she had to do was keep doing what she was doing and rub against his prostate, leave him needing her more than ever. Over and over her fingers massaged him, the pressure slowly increasing each time her fingers pressed against the hardened bulge. She cupped his balls in one hand, supporting the weight of his tight, heavy sac, while he stood with one arm 99


around her and the other braced against the wall. She lifted her gaze, her eyelashes beaded with droplets of water, and smiled as she lowered to her knees. Kevin swallowed hard, fighting for control as she licked her way down his stomach and around his bellybutton. His hips jerked forward, his rigid cock begging to be devoured between her lips. From the corner of his eye he saw their steamy reflection, his hand tangled in her hair, her head angled, her sweet, soft mouth planting soft kisses down his torso. “I need to come in your mouth,” he said under his breath. She met his eyes again and watched him as she parted her lips and swirled her tongue along the head of his dick, licking away sticky pre-cum. His breath turned ragged, his balls so tight and hard they hurt. She had to know how much he needed her, how he couldn’t possibly wait another moment, and she gave him what he needed, plunging his rock-hard prick deep into her mouth. Her head bobbed, and he watched her in the mirror, how her hair clung to her slender, wet back, how her ass stuck out—and how much he wanted to fuck her like that. For a moment he stopped breathing and focused on their joined images, enjoying how she looked kneeling before him. “You like that?” he asked, hearing her groan. She worked him faster, harder than before, her actions telling him how much she wanted him to come in her mouth. His belly quivered, the birth of an eruption that took hold of him. 100


Relief washed over him, bathed him as much as the water sliding down his naked body. He let go of her hair and licked his lips, watching as she allowed him to slip from her mouth. He waited for her to spit his seed down the drain, but she stood, holding on to him for balance, and merely wiped her lips before she kissed him, her lips scorching hot, the smell of him on her breath. “Until today, I didn’t like going to the gym,” she said, swiping her wet hair from her eyes. Kevin ran his hands over her stomach and along her waist, feeling the curve of her body and the way his caress seemed to mold to her. “Imagine if we worked out here together every day,” he murmured, nudging her thighs apart. Now it was her turn to swallow hard and hold on to him. “I think we’d be kicked out in a week.” “There are a lot of gyms around here,” he said, salivating for a taste of her. “We could hop from one to the next.” She smiled, hopping in place until she rested with her injured leg bent at the knee and supported by a shower bench. Twisting, she pumped soap into the palm of her hand and sudsed up his hair, her fingers drawing circles against his scalp. He bent, nuzzling her stomach and the tuft of soft hair between her legs already wet and sticky from her juices. Gert inhaled sharply, her hand resting against the top of his head as he gently stroked her vulva, feeling her soft, hot skin. She already smelled like sex and his cock responded at once, hardening the moment he ran his tongue along the slit of her 101


cunt and made her quiver. With her legs wide apart he blew warm air against her clitoris, then closed his lips around the tight knot of flesh and flicked his tongue against her, feeling how hard and smooth she was for him. He felt her begin to lean, opening wider for him to fuck her with his tongue or finger her as she liked, and he wouldn’t disappoint her. He planned to do whatever it took to get her off as she stood above him, then he’d bend her over in the shower, her hair in her eyes, her body belonging to him as it should have long ago. “You feel too damn good to me, Kevin,” she murmured, her body starting to quiver. He answered her with a flick of his tongue along her labia, tasting her as she stood helpless for him, barely able to breathe or speak. She gazed down at him, then up at the curtain they hadn’t shut. “Don’t even think about it,” he told her, tracing along her slit. He ran his fingers along her outer labia, exploring the round, beautiful curves of her body. Her inner lips hung down, begging to be kissed and licked. He couldn’t stop himself from groaning as he sucked on her sweet, hot flesh, his tongue delving into her. He felt her muscles contract, needing to hold on to him, even though he hadn’t been inside of her. “What if—” He pulled back and licked his lips. “If someone walks in, let ’em watch.” 102


“Kevin—” He pulled her clit into his mouth, sucking hard on her until her words turned into a throaty groan. Reaching behind her, he plunged two fingers into her pussy, surprised at how soaking wet she’d become. Her body clenched around him, held him so tight he wished he was buried inside of her, enjoying the feel of her smooth walls. She reacted exactly how he wanted her, compliant to her needs but wary of being caught, a lady and a vixen rolled into one. That’s what had made it exciting to be with her in the empty office with window washers looking on. She definitely had a wild side, even if she didn’t want to admit it. “Do you know how good you taste?” he asked, cupping her vulva. He massaged her with one hand, then teased her clit with his tongue again until he felt her start to tremble, reeling her in, then releasing her over and over again. “I need to feel you inside me,” she begged, her eyes closed, her head tilted back. He reached up and smoothed his hand over her hardened nipples and felt her womb contract. Her breath hitched and she grabbed his hand, pressing his fingers between her legs until he entered her. All too soon she began to shake, little jolts of her orgasm leaving her almost unable to stand. Eyes closed, she smiled and caressed the back of his neck as he stood. “This is what I want from you. Forever.” “Trust me, Gertie, I’m not arguing with you there.” “Good, because I need you right now. I need to feel you with me.” 103


“You’ve got me,” he replied, kissing her ear. She’d always had him, whether she realized it or not. She dragged her hand down his body as he brought his lips to hers and kissed her hard, pressing her body to his. She rubbed against him, gliding his cock against her flat stomach. Taking his hands, she guided them to her hips and began to turn in his arms until her ass cheeks tempted his erection. Kevin bit his lip, hungry for her in every way possible. She knelt on the bench and arched her back, allowing him to rub the head of his cock between her cheeks. He felt her press up against him and nearly came just thinking about being inside of her. Slowly he bent her forward, his fingers tracing her spine. Again he turned toward the mirror and found her doing the same, watching him stand up against her with his dick wet with arousal, the tip pressed firmly against her sphincter. Her hands pressed against the tile wall, her hips moving back and forth. She met his eye through their reflections and he studied her. Damp hair cascaded down her shoulders and framed her face. He reached up and touched her cheeks and swollen lips while he leaned forward and entered her, sighing as he buried his cock slowly into her. He couldn’t believe how tight she felt around him, how snug and perfect they fit together. Gert tensed just slightly and he wrapped his arm around her, holding her tight as he thrust forward, filling her. She breathed and sighed his name as he made love to her slowly, each thrust of his hips against her ass bringing him 104


deeper. At last she turned her head to the side and he kissed her, his tongue sweeping against hers, catching her groans and feeling her pleasure reverberate through him. He played with her clit, circling and stroking her until she could no longer keep quiet. She lost herself to him, and once she began to groan his name, he couldn’t possibly hold back a moment longer. Another hard climax shook both of them, raged their joined bodies into heated passion until he thought the water would boil around them. Somehow, in a cloud of lust, he managed to draw her into his arms and hold her tight, oblivious to the world around them. Gert smiled and rested her forehead against his and squeezed his left shoulder. “When did you get that tattoo?” “I was at a conference out in San Diego when it happened and I couldn’t get back. Got it that night. Felt like hell not being there at his service, but it was all I could do. He was like…he was a brother to me, Gertie. I always wanted a brother when I was younger, and he was the closest I ever came. I still miss him. He did a lot for me, more than I could have ever asked.” “The last time I ever saw you two together, he told me not to screw up your life.” “I think he’d be surprised to see how I turned out.” She smiled. “I think he figured you had it in you, but he was right. I think I would have held you back if we’d kept up how we were going.” “Is that why you wouldn’t see me?” 105


She gave a sullen nod. “He told me one time you and I are like magnets. We can be pulled apart, but eventually we’re getting back together in a head-on collision.” “Sounds about right.” They sat quietly for a moment, the water running down the right side of his body. He felt a sense of relief in living up to what Tony had expected of him, relief he’d never expected to find. They weren’t the heart-to-heart type, buddies who spent the weekends messing around the house or with cars or stuff like that. Their entire relationship was based around the fire station, and once Tony wasn’t there anymore, Kevin had made the decision to keep going. “About those magnets—” “Stay with me,” she said, linking her arms around his neck. He blinked, feeling her melt into his arms as though she couldn’t bear to be away from him. “I will.” “Promise?” She kissed him hard, her hands in his hair. “For as long as you’ll let me.” “For as long as you can tolerate me,” she corrected. “Trust me,” he said, pulling her onto his lap. She chuckled, her fingers wrapped around his growing erection. “I have a high tolerance for you.”

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GABRINA GARZA

Mom, crazy person, and animal rescuer. That’s the gist of it. A native of the Chicago suburbs, Gabrina Garza writes to get out of doing the dishes. When she’s not writing or dodging household duties, she’s either embarrassing her children in public or walking her foster dogs, of which she has way too many. Check out her website for all you never wanted to know: www.gabrina.com. *

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Don’t miss Circle Of Friends: All Wet, by Gabrina Garza, available at AmberHeat.com!

After everything around her changes, Carleena wants to go back to something normal. She’s just lost her job as a planner for the stars and decides the best thing to do is return home for some R&R. She’s in the middle of her personal time when the guy her mother hires to take care of her plants and dogs gives her hell! What’s a girl to do? But Carleena discovers her life isn’t as screwed as she originally thought, and the black cloud she thought would permanently stay over her head might just be lifted when the

house sitter turns out to be someone she knew from high school, the shy and oh-so-sexy Ben Pinato, her former best friend who completely faded from her life. When another old friend returns, Carleena is forced to wonder what sort of relationship Ben and Jackie have had all this time. Can two best friends in high school recapture their connection and possibly turn it into a little more? Or have the years between them created a rift not even a hot encounter can save? She moved on with her life…has Ben done the same?

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